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==First War for Armageddon== [[File:Armageddon.jpg|thumb|right|A typical Tuesday on Armageddon]] ===The Beginning=== The first war for Armageddon began with a series of [[Chaos]] rebellions in the hive populace as the [[Daemon]] [[Space Hulk]] ''Devourer of Souls'' came out of the warp above the planet. Much of the [[World Eaters]] legion was aboard the hulk, and they made planetfall amid the bloody rebellions, [[RIP AND TEAR|slaughtering all resistance on the main continent]]. Realizing that the main hives were lost, what was left of the loyalist populations retreated to the smaller continent across the sea to regroup and resupply at the small military bases and outposts located there. For a few short weeks the [[Khorne|Khornate]] hordes busied themselves with sacrificing civilians to summon daemons to bolster their ranks, and the Loyalists used this time to fortify as well as they could, but they had little more to offer their foes than [[Lasgun|flashlights]] and insults. The Blood God's hordes turned their eyes to the last defenders, now bolstered by daemons and the [[Daemon Prince#Demon Primarch|Daemon Primarch]] [[Angron]] himself. The ragged refugees and soldiers could do little more than pray for deliverance when... ===The Cavalry Arrives=== Out of the fucking blue with no real lore explanation the [[Space Wolves|Vlka Fenryka]] showed up, led by the [[Logan Grimnar|Old Wolf]] himself! The wolves blast the fuck out of the ''Devourer of Souls'' and make planetfall to help the remaining [[Planetary Defense Force]] and [[Armageddon Steel Legion|Steel Legion]] forces defend the remaining civilians while they awaited the [[Grey Knights|help]] that [[Logan Grimnar|Logan]] had called for. They actually started gaining ground against the World Eaters until Angron and his [[Awesome|Cruor Praetoria]], his bodyguard of twelve [[Bloodthirster]]s, charged the Imperial line and started [[RIP AND TEAR|chopping up everything that stood between them and Armageddon's south pole]]. The [[Grey Knights]] fucking finally show up to the party and this 'ragged brotherhood' fight Angron and his Bloodthirster posse and win when their brotherhood's Grandmaster was able to banish [[Angron]] after [[Hyperion]] shattered the daemon Primarch's blade. Of the 109 Grey Knights who took to the field, [[Grimdark|13 survived]]. Following [[Angron]]'s banishment the Wolves and Steel Legion were able to destroy the few Khornate forces that remained. ===The Months of Shame=== As the whole planet had been contaminated by [[Chaos]], by the sanction of [[Inquisition|Inquisitor Lord Ghesmei Kysnaros]], the decided course of action was that the remaining population of Armageddon, civilians and soldiers alike, were to be [[Grimdark|sterilized and sent to Inquisitorial compounds to be worked to death]] or otherwise exterminated, and optimistically intended to have any Space Wolves who had seen the Grey Knights be mindwiped save for Grimnar. The Space Wolves were not fucking amused, to put it mildly. Logan [[RAGE|politely and calmly]] explained to the Inquisitor that by punishing the citizens of Armageddon for their heroism and survival, the Inquisition were sullying the honour of the men that yet lived and disrespecting the memories of the dead. The Inquisitor Lord more or less told Logan to go fuck himself. [[RAGE|The Old Wolf was not amused]]. Shortly after this exchange, surviving refugees and soldiers began to be transported off-world, only to mysteriously 'disappear' (certainly nothing to do with the Grey Knights knocking out their warp-drives then blowing them apart, not at all!). The Wolves pretty quickly figured out what was up and called the Inquisition to explain their deeds, but they weren't feeling talkative. The Inquisition began firing on any civilian craft leaving the planet, including the ones escorted by the Space Wolves, who blocked the Inquisitorial fire, [[Noblebright|first with their void shields and then with the hulls of their ships, but never fired back.]] After months of tense standoffs and passive resistance against the Inquisition, the Space Wolves had eventually dispersed unquantified numbers of survivors and utterly shattered the Inquisition's best attempts at containment (including several outright [[Exterminatus]] actions on planets where survivors were believed to have been), to the point where the Inquisition themselves unofficially admitted containment was simply no longer possible. Having failed with his previous attempts, the Inquisitor Lord was feeling a bit [[butthurt]] and so decided to lash out, and this is where the Space Wolves finally got sick of the Inquisition's shit. See, the Inquisitor Lord Kysnaros and the Grey Knights Grand Master serving him had hit upon a brilliant (read: utterly bone-headed) plan: they would call a truce with the Wolves and meet with them in a neutral system to parley, with their respective ships' weapons and shields powered down to prevent any "unfortunate incidents". The catch, of course, was that the Inquisition never intended to live up to their word - when the fleets met as planned, they would open fire almost immediately to cripple the Space Wolves' fleet and force Grimnar to submit to their demands under the threat of annihilation. Grimnar, unaware of the trap, duly showed up in the relic [[Strike Cruiser]] ''Scramaseax'' with its weapons off and shields powered down (as both sides had agreed upon), only for its escorts to be destroyed and the Strike Cruiser itself halfway crippled. Kysnaros took a moment to gloat before "inviting" Grimnar across to his ship, to discuss how the Wolves were going to atone for their actions against the Inquisition (hint: it involved stripping away a lot of their independence and sending them on a [[Lamenters|Penitent Crusade]]). As it would turn out however, that Inquisitorial Gloating™ would prove to be a bit premature. Unsurprisingly ''royally'' pissed off at this betrayal and Kysnaros's outrageous demands, [[Just as Planned|Grimnar traveled to the Inquisitor's ship]], and (upon finding out he gave the order to fire on the Wolves) [[Not as Planned|promptly split the Grey Knights Grand Master open from head to nadgers before he could even draw his blade]], before verbally tearing into both the Grey Knights (who were becoming increasingly demoralized, feeling this campaign was a failure and far out of their remit) and the Inquisitor Lord for their incompetence, betrayal of parley, and overall pig-headed approach. When the Knights tried to prevent the remaining Wolves (Logan and three of his Honour Guard, all others having died in the betrayal) from teleporting out, the Wolves answered by shooting their way back to the ''Scramaseax'' and departing the system at speed. (Evidently the Inquisitor Lord thought it was a good idea to be in a void war with [[Logan Grimnar]], a dude who can call on EIGHT battle barges and FUCKING THIRTY [[Strike Cruiser]]s, and in command of a chapter, a [[First Founding]] chapter no less, of Space Marines, and whose [[Awesome|forces are typically assumed to be approximately triple the average number]], [[Black Templars|if not larger]]. [[Rape|He was wrong]].) ===The End=== The next few months were... [[Anal Circumference|messy, to say the least]]. The Space Wolves, infuriated by this latest betrayal, began actively hunting down and destroying Kysnaros's vessels - including the 10,000-year-old GK flagship ''Glaive of Janus'', with its entire crew and the fifty Veteran Grey Knights aboard. The Inquisitor Lord, despite knowing that any effort at containing Armageddon's survivors had failed by this point, responded by escalating the purges of located survivors and calling in favours from [[Red Hunters|the Inquisition's unofficial Astartes lapdogs]]. It was also around this time that a number of the Inquisitor's underlings (among them, [[Hyperion]] of the Grey Knights and Fenrisian Inquisitor Jarlsdottyr) began plotting to assassinate Inquisitor Lord Kysnaros outright, fearing that his actions were going to spark off an outright civil war between the Wolves and the Inquisition. After eight months of the Inquisition getting its ass kicked, the Inquisitor Lord finally called on every resource he could muster and set off to [[Fenris]] with an entire [[Imperial Navy]] fleet, a [[Grey Knights]] Strike Cruiser and the entire [[Red Hunters]] Chapter fleet. Their mission? To hold Fenris, as well as the (currently lightly-defended) Fang hostage, and ultimately (again, ''optimistically'') intending to strong-arm the Wolves into a final parley in which the Inquisition could dictate the terms under the threat of annihilating the Wolves' home. [[Plague of Unbelief|Y'know, cuz it worked so well when Bucharis tried it.]] To make a long story short: the Wolves caught onto the plan and returned, attacking the Inquisition's task force; both sides gave each other bloody noses and everyone lost various amounts of men and ships (the Inquisition-GK-RH soup more so than the Wolves), and the fighting ended when Logan thoroughly demonstrated that for all that the Grey Knights are peerless [[psykers]] capable of going toe-to-toe with [[daemons]] and perma-killing them, in a close-quarters fight they couldn't hold a candle to the sons of Russ. He made this point by teleporting to the Inquisition flagship's bridge, killing the Lord Inquisitor (who by now was on the verge of a nervous breakdown as he realized how ''monumentally'' boned they all were) in a single blow, and throwing [[Hyperion]] a [[Kharn]] vs [[Erebus]] level of beating as his retinue dismantled the surviving Grey Knights. With the top Inquisitor dead, Hyperion busy being beaten into ground beef, and Logan both utterly frothing mad and more than willing to kill everyone aboard, [[Bjorn]] teleported up into the brouhaha and had what is quite possibly the single most "Bjorn" moment ever. Not only did Bjorn tell the Inquisition to get off his damn lawn, not only did he tell Logan to "quit making so much damn noise with this out-of-hand party, young man," Bjorn actually came onto a Fenrisian Inquisitor (who earlier had tearfully fallen to her knees in reverent awe upon first seeing Bjorn and now fought at his side AGAINST the Inquisition's hooligans), calling her a "beautiful frost-born maiden" (revealing himself to be a crotchety old romantic neckbeard after our own hearts). Everyone was pretty fucking dumbfounded, but hey, the Lord Inquisitor was dead, and he was pretty much the only one who'd been in favour of this strategy in the first place (though his colleagues and implicitly the highest levels of the Inquisition, promptly began ([[Derp|AGAIN, optimistically]]) looking for ways to bring the Wolves to heel), so the vast majority of those involved simply shrugged and went their own ways. Inquisitors, even Inquisitor Lords getting ahead of themselves, trying to throw their weight around with Astartes, and then getting in way over their heads is hardly unprecedented, and is a scenario that usually only ends one way. Trying that shit with First Founding chapters however... You'd have better odds trying your luck in a game of [[Rocks Fall, Everyone Dies|chicken with a black hole]]. Just ask the [[Dark Angels]]. [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lT2g2JywF2g| Now in song form!]
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