Editing Evony (section)

==What else do you need to know?==
...wait, fuck, you're serious???

===The actual game===
It's a shit Civ-clone with graphics stolen from ''Age of Empires 2''. The blatant copying is so obvious it's ridiculous.

===Ads AKA the only reason we even have this article===
While low-grade browser-based Civ-em-ups are nothing new, when the retards who run Evony realized that nobody gave two fucks about theirs, they decided to make up for it by spamming the shit out of advertisers with automated adspace - such to the point where Google has forcibly blocked attempts by Evony's makers hundreds of times to field more ads, and yet countless ones have made it through. Even after the blanket-block by Google, the sheer number of bots Evony's makers have unleashed has caused the game's ads to be spammed s across every fucking community everywhere - you can't get away from this shit without crap like Firefox's Adblock and Noscript.

When this failed, they began instituting the usual methods: comment spam, praise from alleged "critics", pictures jacked from other games. When ''that'' failed, they introduced [[PROMOTIONS|tits]] to the ads that naturally didn't reflect the actual game. The Evony Ads are so notoriously ridiculous that they can make the most innocuous of pages look like a fuck-mothering softcore porn site. Oh, and with images stolen from Google Image Search. Fuck year. As is expected for a fifth-rate game's ad campaign, [https://thesocietypages.org/socimages/2009/07/14/evolution-of-evony-video-game-ads/ they eventually devolved] to being 95% tits, to the point that [[FAIL|other shitty web browser games made fun of them]].

[[File:Evony_History.jpg]]

The game still exists, and in the late 2010 and 2020's, they've tried a new trick: pretending to be a pin-pulling game where you have to pill the right pins in the right order to release water, lava, monsters, and treasure. Then run adds showing somebody playing the game stupidly, to frustrate the viewer into wanting to play the game to "show them how it's done". To their credit, the game actually ''has'' puzzle stages like that, but you naturally have to play the Civ game to unlock them.

===But wait! There's more!===
Worst of all, dozens of sites and companies decided to copy their methods - genre-shuffled clones, reliance on similarly shitty ads, and using base-level titillation (in both senses of the word) as marketing with the most "successful" ones being Game of War: Fire Age and Mobile Strike. That, in turn, has led to a number of various faux-Civ clones that exist solely for the most cynical of cash grabs, and the whale-hunting cancer [http://www.androidpolice.com/2017/06/29/final-fantasy-xv-mobile-spin-off-new-empire-pay-win-junk/ has even spread to] Final Fantasy, [[Derp|of all fucking things]] (and they didn't even try to hide the blatant hack job, either).

On top of all that, the Evony game itself is loaded to the gills with '''spyware'''. It will infect your machine faster than [[Nurgle]]'s turgid cock and harvest all kinds of info, so if ever you had to pick ''one'' reason out of several not to play it, then there you go. Oh, and the game's operators are under investigation by the FBI for potentially using this info for identity theft. They're also currently in trouble with international police for their involvement in keeping people as slaves to run Gold-Farming services for games like [[World of Warcraft]], and the owners of the company have gone to some lengths to try and [[1984]] anything that could connect their shitty game to it. Reap what you sow, you fucking oxygen thieves.