Editing Fire and Fury (section)

===Crew of the Sucidal Insanity===
====HQ====
=====Tweedle Dick and Tweedle Cunt=====
[[File:Tweedle Dick and Tweedle Cunt art.jpeg|thumb|left|'' WE’RE TOTALLY NOT FUCKING GAY!!! WE JUST HATE EACH OTHERS FUCKING GUTS, SHARE A SHIT-TINY ROOM AND HAVE A PET THAT NEITHER OF US FUCKING WANTED BUT WE THOUGHT IT WOULD SAVE OUR RELATI (COUGH!!!) CAPTAINCY!!!'']]
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'''Fluff:'''
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A company should only really have one captain, especially in the case of angry marines as it is a scientific fact that if you put a group of angry marines into a room together (or just two angry marines, or even a single bored marine) and ask them to come up with a plan of action, that plan of action will quickly degrade into “PUNCH THE OTHER ANGRY FUCKING IN THE CUNT!!!” However, the canteen brawl which was supposed to decide the leader of the “WHY DO WE HAVE TO FOLLOW THOSE CUNTS?!!!” company and their ship The Suicidal Insanity resulted in Tweedle Dick and Tweedle Cunt knocking each other out simultaneously via violent kicks to the bollocks, and so the two of them were made captain. Not two separate captains mind you, there was only one position available, and instead of simply making two such captaincies available would have been too level headed and logical, and so now Dick and Cunt are both, technically, the same captain. And so now they are stuck for all eternity/until one or both of them die, to spend all their time in each other’s company like a married couple in the bitterest of relationships.

This unlikely pairing is always followed by Equal Opportunity Genital Muncher the Honey Badger, named so because they (nobody is stupid enough to try and check its gender) are not fussy on who’s genitals it bites off. It is not known where Equal Opportunity came from, as the large numbers of honey badgers which could normally found in the vicinity of angry marines had to be removed (to make the faction a little bit more sensible from a story perspective), but as honey badgers do turn up from time to time (such as hiding in underwear draws, in toilets or as their mutant honey badger form) most people assume that Equal Opportunity is simply a honey badger that survived the editorial cuts.

Another theory (proposed by psykers who get too near the creature) is that Equal Opportunity is actually a warp familiar, spawned by the hatred between Dick and Cunt. The psykers think this because whenever Equal Opportunity looks at them they get the psychic equivalent of having their genitals chewed off.</div>
</div>

This unit contains 1 Tweedle Dick, 1 Tweedle Cunt and 1 Equal Opportunity Genital Muncher the Honey Badger ('''Power Level X'''). Only one of this unit may be included in your army. If this unit is your warlord then the whole unit is treated as being your warlord.
{| class=wikitable
|- valign=top
! Name !! M !! WS !! BS !! S !! T !! W !! A !! Ld !! Sv
|-
| '''Tweedle Dick''' || 6" || 2+ || 2+ || 5 || 4 || 5 || 3 || 8 || 3+
|-
| '''Tweedle Cunt''' || 6" || 2+ || 4+ || 6 || 4 || 5 || 4 || 8 || 3+
|-
| '''Equal Opportunity Genital Muncher the Honey Badger''' || 6" || 2+ || - || 4 || 4 || 2 || 6 || 8 || 5+
|}
'''Wargear'''
*A Maw and Jaws you don’t want anywhere near your squish parts (Equal Opportunity Genital Muncher the Honey Badger only)
*Three Storm Bolters (Tweedle Dick only)
*The “Sneaky” Knife (Tweedle Dick only)
*Two Broken Power Fists (Tweedle Cunt only)
*Frag Grenade (Tweedle Dick and Tweedle Cunt only)

'''Special Rules:'''
*'''ALWAYS ANGRY!!!'''
*'''Dual Melee Weapons'''
*'''GET THE FUCK OFF MY LEG!!!:''' Sometimes, running around with two power fists is not enough for Tweedle Cunt to beat the shit out of his enemies, so he will enlist (unwillingly) Tweedle Dick to act as a larger and angrier melee weapons.
**At the beginning of each fight phase, you may decide whether Tweedle Cunt will pick up Tweedle Dick and use him as an improvised weapon. If so Tweedle Dick suffers D2 mortal wounds and may not fight for the duration of the fight phase. However, Tweedle Cunt counts as being equipped with an ''“Improvised” Weapon'' for the duration of the fight phase, but counts as not being equipped with his two broken power fists for the duration of the fight phase.
*'''YOU FUCKING IDIOT!!!:''' “HOW DOD YOU FUCKING MISS THAT SHOT YOU FUCKING CUBT?!!!” (THUMP)
**Whenever Tweedle Dick or Tweedle Cunt fail a hit roll at any time they immediately suffer a strength 4 ap0 D1 hit which is resolved immediately for each failed hit. 
*'''Feel no pain:''' ITS FUCKING DIFFICULT TO TAKE A BOLT SHELL TO THE FUCKING HEAD SERIOUSLY WHEN YOUR GOT THE CUNT BADGER BITING YOUR BALLS!!!
**As long as Equal Opportunity Genital Muncher the Honey Badger is alive, all models in this unit ignore damage taken on a 5+ on a D6, except for Equal Opportunity, who ignores damage received on a 4+.
*'''Otherworldly Badger:''' Whether Equal Opportunity is real, or a warp spawn, it’s effect on nearby psykers is undeniably effective.
**As long as Equal Opportunity Genital Muncher the Honey Badger is alive, this unit has a 6+ invulnerability save and may deny one psychic power a turn, and may add 1 to its deny rolls.

'''Keywords''':
*Faction: {{W40kKeyword|Angry Marine}}, {{W40kKeyword|Imperium}} 
*{{W40kKeyword|HQ}}, {{W40kKeyword|Character}}, {{W40kKeyword|Infantry}}, {{W40kKeyword|Tweedle Dick and Tweedle Cunt}}, {{W40kKeyword|DEMON)}} (Equal Opportunity Genital Muncher the Honey Badger only)

=====Sargent “IN CHARGE OF BORING SHITE!!!”=====
[[File:Sargent “IN CHARGE OF BORING SHITE!!!” Art.jpeg|thumb|left|'' I’M FUCKING SANTA IF SANTA GAVE YOU TAX REFUND INVOICES WHICH WERE ON FIRE!!! HO HO HO MOTHERFUCKERS!!!'']]
While Tweedle Dick and Cunt are constantly fighting or trying to Prize Equal opportunity off their balls, Sargent “IN CHARGE OF BORING SHITE!!!” is actually the one who runs the Suicidal Insanity, but if you’d asked anyone 50 years ago what the young (as he was known then) Joshua Biggins would do once he was filling trained, nobody would have said “second in command of an army of yellow psychopaths”. From the age of eight Joshua had been brought up as an orphan by the Adeptus Ministrorum and had shown great promise as a clerk and general organiser, with the potential of becoming middle management (effectively as comfortable as an orphan in the Imperium is ever likely to get).

However, on one fateful day at the ripe old age of 14 (ancient by marine recruit standards) Joshua was transferred to the part of the Administratum that worked with the Ultramarines, who ground him down over the course of 6 months with their “Courage and honour” and their constant babbling about the “Codex Astartes” until some poor serf said “may our spiritual liege guide you” one too many times. Nobody knows what it was that had put Joshua on edge before the serf said those words, but when the next shift arrived to relieve the clerk of his duties they found the poor ultramarine serf with his head stuck up his own arse.

After this Joshua went feral for a while, living in the ducts of ships, surviving by licking dew of the walls and burning anything ultramarine related he could find, until one day the ship he happened to sneak into was the battle barge Considerable Shouting, where he was found basking in front of a blazing fire created by burning the battle barges entire supply of Codex Astartes (used by the Fiery Aggressors in their promethium mixtures) screaming “BURN YOU STUCK UP CUNTS!!! BURN!!!” After this Joshua was quickly inducted, rose to the rank of black brother Sargent and moved over to the suicidal insanity, who’s captain Dweedle Dick and Cunt made him their second in command, partly because he is an excellent administrator, but mostly because if he finds an accounting error he will go on a burning spree through the accounts department.

Sometimes, Boring Shite will combine his two jobs of administrator and burny bastard on the battlefield, by riding into battle on his Mobile Accounts Department, an extra large black brother bike which holds extra large fuels tanks, extra flamers, flameproof filing systems and a servitor in the side car who pulls double duty as data processor and gunner. All of this colossal weight is too much even for a beefed up astartes bike, so the whole flaming mess is pulled along by a team of five normal black brother bikers, all of whom are extraordinarily pissed off that they’re stuck towing the bastard around.On such a behemoth of burning belligerence little can stand in the way of boring shite, as he continuously swaps from burning his foes alive, to running calculations on why the enemy he just roasted where a bunch of idiots.

This unit contains 1 Sargent “IN CHARGE OF BORING SHITE!!!” ('''Power Level 5'''). Only one of this unit may be included in your army.
{| class=wikitable
|- valign=top
! Name !! M !! WS !! BS !! S !! T !! W !! A !! Ld !! Sv
|-
| '''Sargent “IN CHARGE OF BORING SHITE!!!”''' || 6" || 2+ || 4+ || 5 || 4 || 5 || 3 || 8 || 3+
|-
| '''Sargent “IN CHARGE OF BORING SHITE!!!” On Mobile Accounts Department''' || 10" || 2+ || 4+ || 5 || 6 || 9 || 3 || 8 || 2+
|}

'''Wargear:'''
*Burning Bag of Codex Astartes
*Molotov Cocktails
*The “Mistake” Remover
*20 Flamers (Sargent “IN CHARGE OF BORING SHITE!!!” On Mobile Accounts Department Only)
*Mega Flamer of Wrath (Sargent “IN CHARGE OF BORING SHITE!!!” On Mobile Accounts Department Only)
*Flaming Chain Flail (Sargent “IN CHARGE OF BORING SHITE!!!” On Mobile Accounts Department Only)

'''Abilities:'''
*'''Always Angry'''
*'''Dual Melee Weapons'''
*'''Burning Weapons:''' If an enemy model suffers any unsaved wounds from any weapons this unit has but is not slain; at the end of the Phase, roll a D6; on a 6, the target suffers a mortal wound.
*'''Flames of Wrath:''' Your opponent must subtract 1 from all hit rolls that target this unit. In addition, all hit rolls made of 6 that target this unit will always hit (regardless of modifiers).
*'''Pyromaniac Brothers:''' If this unit is within 3" of any friendly '''Fiery Aggressor''' unit that contains 3 or more models; this unit receive the benefits of cover, even if they are not in cover.
*'''I’M IN CHARGE AROUND HERE:''' Few are stupid enough to argue against an angry accountant when he has the numbers to back up the fact that your a fucking idiot.
**ANGRY MARINE units within 6” of this model may re-roll failed hit rolls of 1. In addition to this, if your army is battle forged then you gain 1 command point.
*Shield of Flames: The Sargent doesn’t carry around an iron halo or any kind of storm shield. Instead the flames around him burn so hot that bullets have a nasty habit of either deforming before they hit him (depriving them of their armour piercing potential) or become too scared to hit him, instead flying off at oblique angles.
**A model with this rule has a 4+ invulnerability save.
*'''BURN YOU PITIFUL BITCHES!!!:''' Boring Shite has an innate and numerical understanding of fire, and will happily assist others in being more burny if it increases the overall levels of “FUCKING FIRE EVERYWHERE!!!”
**Weapons which automatically hit their target wielded by friendly units within 6” of Sargent “IN CHARGE OF BORING SHITE!!! may roll twice the number of dice when determining the number of hits and discard the lowest half of dice.
*'''MAXIMIUM POWER!!!:''' RAGE CAPACITORS TO MAXIMUM!!! MOLTEN CARBERATOR TO OVERDRIVE!!! SPINNY DIALS TO FUCKING ELEVEN!!! TO INFINITY AMD BEYOND MOTHER FUCKERS!!!
**(Sargent “IN CHARGE OF BORING SHITE!!!” On Mobile Accounts Department Only) At the beginning of your movement phase you may decide to have this unit deactivate all their bikes safety measures and put their pedals so hard to the floor that “pedal to the metal” doesn’t cover it. If so roll a D6 for each model in the unit, on a 4+ the unit suffers a mortal wound, but the unit gains the FLY keyword, increases their movement distance to 28” and enemy units firing at it until your next movement phase suffer -1 to their hit rolls.
*'''FUCK THIS THING'S BIG!!!:''' THAT'S WHAT SHE SAID!!!
**(Sargent “IN CHARGE OF BORING SHITE!!!” On Mobile Accounts Department Only) A model with this rule and a Mega Flamer if Wrath may only fire its Mega Flamer of Wrath’s FUCK SAFETY MEASURES!!! mode if it also activated its MAXIMUM POWER!!! ability in the same turn. If so it may fire the weapons FUCK SAFETY MEASURES!!! mode despite not having the TITANIC keyword and having moved.
*Belligerent Tow Crew: Don’t forget about the group of Black Brothers who tow the Sargent around. If you do it might be one of them who kills you instead.
**(Sargent “IN CHARGE OF BORING SHITE!!!” On Mobile Accounts Department Only) A unit with this rule may make 10 additional attacks with their chain flail weapon profile each fight phase, but at a minus 1 to hit.

'''Options:'''
*May be upgraded to Sargent “IN CHARGE OF BORING SHITE!!!” On Mobile Accounts Department - 250 pts./10 PP.

'''Keywords''':
*Faction: {{W40kKeyword|Angry Marine}}, {{W40kKeyword|Imperium}} 
*{{W40kKeyword|HQ}}, {{W40kKeyword|Character}}, {{W40kKeyword|Infantry}} (Sargent “IN CHARGE OF BORING SHITE!!!” Only), {{W40kKeyword|Sargent “IN CHARGE OF BORING SHITE!!!”}}, {{W40kKeyword|Black Brother}}, {{W40kKeyword|Biker}} (Sargent “IN CHARGE OF BORING SHITE!!!” On Mobile Accounts Department Only)

====Fast Attack====
=====Black Brother Bike Squad=====
The pinacle of a black brothers burning potential, the black brother bike is the orgy child between every flamer imaginable and an early space age rocket, in that it more resembles a fireball on wheels. Such a bike represents  centuries, if not millennia, of tireless scavenging and construction work by a black brother, as such vehicles are not handed down or stored in an armoury. No no no. That would be tantamount to [[heresy]] in the eyes of a black brother, who see their bikes not as a weapon of war or a vehicle (although they excell at both tasks), but as a physical manifestation of their rage and devotion to flames. This means that a black brother biker is not simply an elite soldier, they are a warrior who has survived centuries of constant war, riding into battle on a vehicle of destruction capable of turning the ground it travels over into molten slag.

Such individuals are held in high regard by other angry marines for the sheer amount of rage they possess and the devotion that they have needed to put into building their bikes. Such individuals are held in such high regard that no angry marine (up to and including the chapter master) would ever touch a black brothers bike without express permission or to save it from certain doom (and even then they would need power fists to not burn themselves on the white hot chassis).

This unit contains 3 Black Brother Bikers (Power Rating 8). It can include up to 3 additional Black Brother Bikers (Power Rating 3 each).
{| class=wikitable
|- valign=top
! Name !! M !! WS !! BS !! S !! T !! W !! A !! Ld !! Sv
|-
| Black Brother Biker || 14" || 3+ || 5+ || 5 || 5 || 2 || 1 || 8 || 3+
|-
|}

'''Wargear:'''
*Each Black Brother Biker is armed with:
::-6 Flamers
::-Flaming Chain Flail
::-Molotov Cocktails

'''Abilities:'''
*'''And They Shall Know No Fear'''
*'''ALWAYS ANGRY'''
*'''Dual Melee Weapons'''
*'''Burning Weapons:''' If an enemy model suffers any unsaved wounds from any weapons this unit has but is not slain; at the end of the Phase, roll a D6; on a 6, the target suffers a mortal wound.
*'''Flames of Wrath:''' Due to wielding flamers and being covered in flames themselves the Black Brothers are always followed by a large cloud of black smoke. While this makes them easy to track, hitting the individual Brothers is a difficult task made more difficult the more Brothers are part of a squad.
*Your opponent must subtract 1 from all hit rolls that target this unit; as long as a Black Brothers unit contains at least 5 models, your opponent must subtract 2 from all hit rolls made by ranged weapons that target this unit, instead of 1. In addition, all hit rolls made of 6 that target this unit will always hit (regardless of modifiers).
*'''Pyromaniac Brothers:''' if this unit is within 3" of any friendly '''Fiery Aggressor''' unit that contains 3 or more models; this unit receive the benefits of cover, even if they are not in cover.
*'''MAXIMUM POWER!!!:''' RAGE CAPACITORS TO MAXIMUM!!! MOLTEN CARBERATOR TO OVERDRIVE!!! SPINNY DIALS TO FUCKING ELEVEN!!! TO INFINITY AMD BEYOND MOTHER FUCKERS!!!
**At the beginning of your movement phase you may decide to have this unit deactivate all their bikes safety measures and put their pedals so hard to the floor that “pedal to the metal” doesn’t cover it. If so roll a D6 for each model in the unit, on a 4+ the unit suffers a mortal wound, but the unit gains the FLY keyword, increases their movement distance to 28” and enemy units firing at it until your next movement phase suffer -1 to their hit rolls.
*'''FUCK THIS THING'S BIG!!!:''' THAT'S WHAT SHE SAID!!!
**A model with this rule and a Mega Flamer if Wrath may only fire its Mega Flamer of Wrath’s FUCK SAFETY MEASURES!!! mode if it also activated its MAXIMUM POWER!!! ability in the same turn. If so it may fire the weapons FUCK SAFETY MEASURES!!! mode despite not having the TITANIC keyword and having moved.

'''Options:'''
*Any model in the unit may add a Flaming Sidecar - 20 pts.
*Any model in the unit may replace 6 of its flamers and Molotov Cocktails for a Mega Flamer of Wrath, but only if it has a Flaming Sidecar - 40 pts.

'''Keywords''':
*Faction: {{W40kKeyword|Angry Marine}}, {{W40kKeyword|Imperium}} 
*{{W40kKeyword|Fast Attack}}, {{W40kKeyword|Biker}}, {{W40kKeyword|Black Brother Bike Squad}}, {{W40kKeyword|Black Brother}}

====Lords of War====
=====Black Brother Knight=====
A Black Brother Knight is what happens when the black brothers start getting penis/flame envy. As the most pyromaniac minded soldiers in the galaxy surely they should be the burniest things around, not some stick-up race of flaming cockroaches. And so, if they feel small and threaten in the flame department the local angry marine knight pilots will wake up one morning to find that their knights have received a bit of a makeover (and that they themselves will have been strapped down into their beds with adamantium duct tape). The first thing to change is the engine, which is either sent into overdrive and the excess heat vented in fiery bursts, or the engines simply replaced with smoke spewing, promethium motors. Next there are the guns, which are replaced with nice big flamers, usually one for throwing out as much flame as possible (for scolding any infantry stupid enough to get close) and one big “FUCK OFF!!!” flame cannon, which has more in common with a volcano cannon than a flamer or a melta gun. Finally, there’s the paint job, which is stripped away with blow torches to create a nice burnt look. When the Knight next enters the battlefield (piloted by which ever black brother won the precious nights fight) it will be mostly obscured by billowing black smoke and tongues of flame, which then quickly engulfs all foolish enough to come too close.

This unit contains 1 Black Brother Knight ('''Power Level 17''').
{| class=wikitable
|- valign=top
! Name !! M !! WS !! BS !! S !! T !! W !! A !! Ld !! Sv
|-
| Black Brother Knight || * || * || * || 8 || 8 || 24 || 4 || 9 || 3+
|}

{| class=wikitable
|- valign=top
! Remaining W !! M !! WS !! BS
|-
| 13-24+ || 12” || 2+ || 3+
|-
| 7-12 || 9” || 3+ || 4+
|-
| 1-6 || 6” || 4+ || 5+
|}

'''Wargear:'''
*One Combi-Combi-Combi-Combi-Combi Flamer
*Six Flamers
*One Mega Flamer of Wrath
*Titanic Feet

'''Special Rules:'''
*'''ALWAYS ANGRY!'''
*'''Dual Melee Weapons'''
*'''Ion Shields:''' WHAT THE FUCK EVEN ARE ION'S DOING BLOCKING BULLETS?!!! THAT MAKES NO FUCKING SENSE!!!
** This model has a 5+ invulnerability save against shooting attacks.
*'''Explodes:''' If this model is reduced to 0 wounds, roll a D6 before removing it from the battlefield; on a 6 it explodes, and each unit within 2D6" suffers D6 mortal wounds.
*'''Super Heavy Walker:''' No matter what angle you look at such a vehicle it is huge, so huge in fact that "THE ONLY THING BIGGER IS YOUR MOM BITCH!!!"
**This model can Fall Back in the Movement phase and still shoot and\or charge in the same turn. When this model Falls Back, it can move over enemy '''INFANTRY''' and '''SWARM''' models, though it must end its turn more than 1" from any enemy units. In addition, this model can move and fire Heavy weapons without suffering the penalty to its hit rolls. Finally, this model only gains a bonus to its armour save for being in cover if at least half of the model is obscured from the firer.
*'''Flames of Wrath:''' Due to wielding flamers and being covered in flames themselves the Black Brothers are always followed by a large cloud of black smoke. While this makes them easy to track, hitting the individual Brothers is a difficult task made more difficult the more Brothers are part of a squad.
**Your opponent must subtract 1 from all hit rolls that target this unit. In addition, all hit rolls made of 6 that target this unit will always hit (regardless of modifiers).
*'''Burning Weapons:''' If an enemy model suffers any unsaved wounds from any weapons this unit has but is not slain; at the end of the Phase, roll a D6; on a 6, the target suffers a mortal wound.

'''Keywords''':
*Faction: {{W40kKeyword|Angry Marine}}, {{W40kKeyword|Imperium}} 
*{{W40kKeyword|Lord of War}}, {{W40kKeyword|Vehicle}}, {{W40kKeyword|Black Brother Knight}}, {{W40kKeyword|Black Brother}}, {{W40kKeyword|Titanic}}