Editing Campaign:Oceans Exalted/Valley (section)

=== Background ===
A long ass fuckin' time ago, a child was born into the Mnemon family. He was always hyper-active, loud, and was prone to breaking things just by being around them. Come primary school, he was the class clown, and only managed to achieve satisfactory performance by cheating off of those with actual talent, and calling in favors upon favors. His muckin' around was fine enough, until he hit Secondary Education, where he was shipped off to the Heptagram. Valley found that Secondary School was far less accepting of boisterous attitudes, especially the Heptagram(But ESPECIALLY the Cloister of Wisdom, which he thankfully didn't attend). The teachers attempts to browbeat him only made his attitude to wreak havoc grow.

Valley-o-Vision:<br>
"Long ass fuckin' time ago in The Realm, without a clue<br>
There lived an ancient family, Immaculate through and through<br>
But yae there was a black sheep, and he knew just what to dooo<br>
His name was young Val-Ley and he refused to step in line<br>
A vision he did see of ffffucking rocking all the tiiime<br>
He wrote a tasty jam and all the MAIDENS DID ALIIIGN"<br>

"OH THE DRAGON'S BALLS WERE BLAZIN' AS I STEPPED INTO HIS CAVE<br>
AND I SLIICED HIS FUCKIN' COCKLES<br>
WITH MY LONG AND SHINEY BLADE<br>
'TWAS I WHO FUCKED THE DRAGON FUCK-A-LIE SING FUCK-A-LOO<br>
AND IF YOU TRY TO FUCK WITH ME THEN I SHALL FUCK YOU TOOOOOO<br>

TIME TO GET IT ON IN THE VALLEY ZONE.<br>
TIME TO LICK A TOAD IN THE VALLEY ZONE.<br>
TIME TO ROCK & ROLL IN THE VALLEY ZONE."<br>

Valley blew up an entire wing of the Heptagram with his reckless, albeit most excellent rocking. Granted, it was actually a joint effort, but the blame was -easily- placed completely on Valley, as he was completely off his tits trippin' balls on -something- he got out of the magical supply closet.

"YOU'VE DISOBEYED MY ORDERS SON WHY WERE YOU EVER BORN?<br>
YOUR BROTHERS'RE TEN TIMES BETTER THAN YOU THE EMPRESS LOVES THEM MORE<br>
THIS MUSIC THAT YOU PLAY FOR US COMES FROM THE DEPTHS OF HELL<br>
ROCK AND ROLL'S THE YOZI'S WORK THEY WANT YOU TO REBEL<br>
YOU'VE BECOME A MIIINDLESS PUPPET<br>
MALFEAAAS WILL PULL THE STRINGS<br>
YOUR HEART WILL LOSE DIRECTION<br>
AND CHAOS IIIIIT WILL BRIIIIING<br>
YOU BETTER SHUT YOUR MOUTH YOU BETTER WATCH YOUR TONE<br>
YOU GOT FOUR WEEKS WITH NO LEAVIN' HOME<br>
DON'T LEMME HEAR YOU CRY DON'T LEMME HEAR YOU MOAN<br>
YOU GOTTA' PRAISE THE ORDER WHEN YOU'RE IN MY HOME."<br>

And so, to get rid of such a nuisance, Valley was deported off to some backwater island in the West to manage the Coconut Production, or something menial.

When Valley finally awoke from his drug-induced stupor, he found himself almost naked, bearing a Sanxian of some sort, a simple yet flamboyant working knowledge of Emerald Circle Sorcery, and stranded in some backwater Satrap doing Coconut-Tallying work.

"Note to self, find whatever I had and take double."