Editing The Guy Who Cried Grendel (section)

=== Part II ===

Okay, so here's what happened last session in the wonderful world of Grendel. The group of acolytes had been dispatched to Solomon, as there were rumors that something might be afoot in the lower parts of the hive. Over the last several weeks, disappearances named as sacrifices to the 'Beast of Solomon' (widely believed to be a myth by majority of the inquisition thought up to give the people living and working there a sort of mental release, a reason that their lives are so terrible) have risen dramatically, to the point that work is slowing drastically. Grendel and Co get sent in to find out what's going on and get the lower hive back to normal, or order a massive purge on it, whichever is necessary to prevent the taint from spreading to the upper hive, as their inquisitor owes some favors to Nobles in the upper hive there, who called in their markers to get this shit resolved.

Oh, and for future reference, the other characters have the following names: Volg Hive Guardsman: Bruul Dakka. Feral World Guardsman: Grak Hak. Imperial World Arbitrator: Acadia Inez. Forge World Tech-priest: Barbosa Cromwell. Imperial World Psyker: Able Bones. Noble Born Cleric (prev. Assassin): Alaric Nihilius. Dusk Feral World Moritat Assassin (prev. Scum): Roth Garm.

Anyway, on the travel to Solomon, we get accosted by pirates shortly after exiting the warp (GM randomly rolls each time). They get past the batteries and dock with our transport, and send in a boarding party, and since they docked in the hallway outside our rooms (we got BAD rooms for the trip) we are the first thing they run into. Thankfully, the blaring sirens and sounds of shouting invaders did wake us, and we had time enough to set up cover and make the hallway something of a deathtrap, and after killing sixteen pirates who tried to rush us, the rest are bunkered down, and we have ourselves a stalemate. After a few rounds pass with only an occasional trade of potshots, Grendel (who had not hit a single pirate with his stub revolver) has an idea. He confers with our new Cleric Nihilius (who had taken the Firebrand redemptionist background) for a bit, and then after fiddling a bit, walks out into the open (he was made to take a fear test to walk down bullet avenue, but failed by less than a degree, so after spending a bit of time whimpering, he went).

The pirates, seeing this, get ready to turn him into a pile of bullets, before a few of them pass an awareness check to notice Grendel had strapped twelve flamer fuel canisters to his chest, and was holding a firebomb in one hand and a molotov (quick and dirty conversion of rotgut using a piece of cloth) in the other, with a lit Iho stick in his mouth. The pirates who passed the check proceed to frantically prevent their less observant compatriots from opening fire. So Grendel walks until he is pretty much right in the faces of the pirates, and proceeds to try and threaten to blow himself up and kill all of them if they don't get off the ship. GM makes Grendel roll an intimidate check (he is unskilled in intimidate). He rolled a 99. GM rules he stands there stuttering and gibbering for a moment, at which point Grendel spends a Fate Point to re-roll. He rolls a 1. The pirates flee for their lives, leaving behind their fallen comrades.

Grendel, before the campaign even truly began, pulled a Gran Torino-esque crazy old man moment, and made pirates run away from one fat guy.

So, thinking we are hot stuff after looting the fallen pirates, the Captain and the other passengers/crew members show up, and congratulate the acolytes. Then Nihilius decides to try and charm the captain into upgrading their room and board, maybe even pay them for services rendered, in light of their actions. He rolls to charm, and rolls a 100. Nihilius insults the 'lesser beings' that are all those not of the Nobility, and turns the admiring masses into bitter and angry fucks, who proceed to think of us as racist, assholic dicks. Way to go Nihilius. We are advised to stay in our piss poor rooms until we arrive at Solomon, and we do. Nihilius is convinced it is the psyker Able's fault, and Able morosely agrees, and flagellates himself in the corner, crying about what a repulsive mutant he is.

The rest of the trip passes without incident, and we land on Solomon, and get down to investigating. We hit up the Administratum, the local law enforcement, and briefly speak with some of the nobles who strong-armed our Inquisitor into doing this. Pretty much all we get is generic legends about the Beast of Solomon, and how things sound like they got worse in the underhive. Rather clearly we will have to investigate there. So we head down to the underhive, and start asking around. Pretty much every time we mention our topic of interest, people get scared shitless and run the fuck away. Understandable, as fluff presents the Beast of Solomon as being a terrifying legend. So, we are getting nowhere, and decide to call it a day after meeting back up and heading to a seedy hotel in the underhive to spend the night.

During the night, Able is awakened by a group of robed and cowled individuals trying to bodily spirit him away from the hotel. In panic, he manifests Warp Howl, and manages to fuck that up with a Psychic Phenomena, and now everyone is floating up onto the ceiling. Predictably, this manages to wake up everyone, who proceed to Able's room, to find Able alone, who proceeds to start apologizing profusely for not catching any of his abductors. Nihilius calls him warp tainted scum not fit to breathe, Able cries, and the Tech-priest Cromwell punches Nihilius in the gut and tells him to stop being a cunt to his teammate, there are more important things to do (Cromwell really only punched him just for a chance to hit a cleric, what with the whole opposed faiths thing). Squabbling commences, and then everyone goes back to sleep with a watch order established.

Morning comes, and the Acolytes have a new topic of inquiry: robed abductors. For a while they get nowhere again, but the Arbitrator Inez actually finds someone who recognizes this, and after some cajoling he tells us that the cowled people took his sister around the time that the sacrifices to the Beast started drastically rising. Interesting. Another day spent inquiring reveals many people have had family members just vanish, and some have also seen these robed strangers taking them away, all taking place during the rise in sacrifices.

Quick backstory, the Beast of Solomon is an open ended horror legend from Disciples of the Dark Gods, and underhivers sacrifice members of their own family and friends just so that it doesn't kill them. These abductions are markedly different.

We even run into someone who had the balls to follow the abductors for a time, and saw them vanishing into the same parts of the underhive the Beast of Solomon is claimed to inhabit. We go back up to the overhive, and contact the Nobles who tasked our inquisitor (and us, by proxy) with this mission, and the cleric and arbitrator converse with them, saying how it would be far easier and expedient to solve this problem if they could help us get some local Arbitrators as backup. Some good charm and blather rolls later, and several of the nobles reluctantly agree. Simultaneous to this, the rest of the party has entered the Inquisitorial holdings in the hive, and after presenting their credentials and introducing themselves, explain how, if they could get some degree of backup, they can most likely make the local inquisitors look responsible for both ending the disappearances, resuming work levels in the underhive, and dispelling the Beast of Solomon myth in one fell swoop. A 1 and a 2 are rolled during this, and lo and behold, some acolyte trainees are sent to get experience with us, and a few Inquisitorial Stormtroopers. Awesome.

So, with allies everywhere, we proceed into the underhive, and start searching near the area the guy had led us to. Sure enough, we find a locked room with lots of noise behind it, and what Grendel identifies as cult symbols on it. It's GO TIME. The Inquisitorial stormtroopers blow the door off with charges and charge in, spraying bullets everywhere. We opt to let the Arbitrators charge in next, and go in last with the trainees, imparting the greatest possible words of wisdom to them: Let other people take the bullets for you.

Funny thing, as we charge in, we notice a great deal of brass and red colors. In fact, looking to near the back of the room, we see some weird lights and the Psyker gets some feedback from Psyniscience. We look at the grinning GM and realize he did it again: We just made a bloodbath out of a Khornate summoning ritual. Fuck. Double Fuck. A goddamn Bloodletter RIDING A JUGGERNAUT OF KHORNE pops in to say hi, and after about two thirds of our forces fail their willpower tests, charges us. What proceeds is a Scooby Doo chase sequence, with us running away from the beast, until the corridor branches. We all split and go different ways, because fuck this scares us. The Daemons charge after the two Guardsmen, Dakka and Hak, and everyone tries to navigate the labyrinth. Grendel and Cromwell make their way back to the cultist room first, and find that the Inquisitorial stormtroopers and the arbitrators had cleaned up, and all the cultist are dead, and it reeks of blood everywhere in that room.

The four trainee acolytes with Grendel and Cromwell gag at the smell, but one remarks 'At least this proves the Beast of Solomon isn't real!'

Remember how the disappearances are different from the Beast sacrifices, and how the abductions are recent whereas the beast is not? GUESS WHAT SQUEEZES THROUGH THE VENTS TO SAY HI. Yeah, BEAST OF SOLOMON TIME. CUE MORE SCOOBY DOO FLEEING. So now pretty much everyone (stormtroopers, arbitrators, acolytes and trainees) are dashing around, both trying to keep away from the daemons (and the beast for those who know it is here) and trying to find each other. The Beast decided to follow Grendel, because all that fat makes for a savory meal I guess, and so Grendel and co are running like hell to get away. Eventually they reach a broken bit of underhive where on one side there is no wall, just a drop the whole way to the surface, about a mile down. And just as we are about to flee out the other pathway, here comes the rest of the party and helpers, chased by the daemons. Good times.

So, we are trapped and terrified, when Grendel and Able devise a plan. Able tries to cast a modified Psychic Stench, one to make something smell highly desirable instead of repulsive, and succeeds in casting it... on Grendel. Grendel charges forward, trying to get in between the monsters, while everyone else tries to get into the tunnels. Both the Beast and the Daemons charge Grendel, but there is a slight problem: Grendel is equidistant between them, and one awesome untrained dodge roll later, they have collided, with the Bloodletter getting thrown onto the Beast, who then tries to eat its new friend, and the Juggernaut temporarily dazed.

Grendel declares he is going to try and climb and ride the Juggernaut. He is made to roll two difficult agility tests, one to climb it and one to mount it. He rolls a 9 and a 12. He then uses Grendel's Claw to goad the Juggernaut forward, and after making some awesome suggestive stabs, encourages it to charge, ramming some of its spikes into the Beast, still entangled with the bloodletter. He tries to turn the Juggernaut, and rolls a 2 on this attack, and gets the Juggernaut, Beast of Solomon and Bloodletter pile to all be moving at ramming speed straight at the broken part of the wall. He attempts to leap off the pile of bodies, rolls a 87 and fails miserably, and spends his last fate point to try again. He fails by one point.

Grendel leaps off the now plummeting pile of bodies, and Burns a fate point, and manages to wrap a hand around an exposed piece of rebar, as behind him a Juggernaut, a Bloodletter and the Beast of Solomon all plummet to their deaths. FUCK YEAH!

And, drum roll please, WHAT HAS GRENDEL WON FOR HIS BADASSERY TODAY!

1 new fate point, with that fresh point smell!

750 bonus experience, for doing the impossible!

+5 permanent Agility for his acrobatic prowess! (bringing the total to 32! He now is a fast fat guy!)

The Sprint Talent (for running away so much!)

1,000 Thrones from the nobles for doing so well at restoring work efficiency amongst their serfs!

A batch of fanboys made of trainee acolytes, arbitrators and a few Inquisitorial Stormtroopers!

BONUS INFO: He had still not bought any Sound Constitutions or armor by this point. Recognizing the folly in this, he bought ONE WHOLE WOUND and SOME MESH ROBES.
AP 3 all, TB 2, 9 Wounds. HE IS NOW UNKILLABLE!

He also added a kill counter to his robe (It has caricatures of a Charnel Daemon, A Juggernaut of Khorne and a Bloodletter on one side, and a the Beast of Solomon on the other, which looks like a giant worm with teeth and scales)

AMUSING INFORMATION:
The GM has now forced Grendel to take Forbidden Lore (Daemons) because he has been responsible for killing three different types (All with Malleus Majoris threat ratings) and RODE A JUGGERNAUT OF KHORNE LIKE IT WAS HIS BITCH.
Grendel reluctantly agreed to actually learn something about the things he kills so easily.