|
|
| (259 intermediate revisions by more than 100 users not shown) |
| Line 1: |
Line 1: |
| {{HurfDurf}}
| | #REDIRECT [[Vampire#Twilight]] |
| | |
| [[Image:Bellasue2.jpg|thumb|right]]
| |
| | |
| '''''Twilight''''' is the next level of obnoxious fangirl faggotry, after the ''Harry Potter'' series.
| |
| | |
| == Plot Synopsis ==
| |
| | |
| Basically a [[Mary Sue]] named Bella gets saved from a car crash by Edward, who is also a [[Mary Sue|Marty Stu]] and looks all gothy and shit.
| |
| | |
| After half a book of plodding romantic crap, we learn that he's a [[Mary Sue|vampire]] (as though the sunken eyes and pale skin weren't a massive tipoff).
| |
| | |
| Most of the of the "action" revolves around [[Mary Sue|Bella]] being saved by her [[Mary Sue|hot sexy bloodsucking boyfriend]] and ends in a [[Mary Sue|"twist"]] that can best be summed up as;
| |
| | |
| ''[[Mary Sue|I'm]] gonna die a horrible death during childbirth, and my [[Mary Sue|kid's]] gonna look like a [[Mary Sue|hellspawn]] all because I fucked a [[Mary Sue|vampire.]]'' ''Oh hold the phone-- it's ok, he's going to turn me into a [[Mary Sue|vampire]] too, and mystical [[vampire]] magic will heal my spine so I can frolic through the forest in heels and a cocktail dress while my [[werewolf]] ex-boyfriend tries to fuck my baby [[Mary Sue|hellspawn]] daughter.''
| |
| | |
| SEQUAL
| |
| | |
| On November 20th 2009 New Moon will be coming out. That's right folks, more vampire hell is coming...oh wait this time they're screwing with werewolves. Yup. They are going to take the awesome war between vampires and werewolves and fill it with goddammed[[Mary Sue]]s. And Bella is probly gonna get filled with werewolf humpjuice. [[Mary Sue|She'll]] get pregnant and and start shootin' [[Mary Sue|babies]] like a cannon.
| |
| | |
| Did we mention it's swamped with [[Mary Sue]]s?
| |
| | |
| The movie version is so bad even the Rifftrax version sucks donkey balls.
| |
| | |
| Basicly WTF?
| |
| | |
| == In conclusion: ==
| |
| <span style="color:#FF0000;font-size:2.5em">''' ''RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGEEEEEE'' '''</span>
| |
| | |
| == External Links ==
| |
| * [http://www.thatguywiththeglasses.com/videolinks/thatguywiththeglasses/bum-reviews/2741-twilight Bum Reviews on ''Twilight''.]
| |
| * [http://www.inquisitr.com/17233/stephen-king-bitchslaps-twilight-author-stephenie-meyer-cant-write-worth-a-darn/ Stephanie Meyer sucks. Stephen King agreed, don't argue about it.]
| |
| | |
| <gallery>
| |
| Image:SWEETMERCIFULFUCK.jpg|Not even Japan is safe.
| |
| Image:King_Troll.jpg|Sir Stephen, King of Trolls.
| |
| Image:LOLTWILIGHT.gif|Bella giving birth to a beautiful baby boy! ^-^
| |
| Image:Twilight_edward_nosferatu.jpg|Know the difference, it could save your life.
| |
| Image:Twilight_Fan_Comment.jpg|
| |
| Image:Twilight_fan.png|
| |
| Image:Gastontwilight.jpg|
| |
| Image:TwilightGif.gif|If you look at this picture, you've basically read the book.
| |
| </gallery>
| |