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{{topquote|Imitation is the sincerest of flattery.|Charles C. Colton, ''Lacon: Or, Many Things in a Few Words: Addressed to Those Who Think''}}
{{topquote|Imitation is the sincerest of flattery.|Charles C. Colton, ''Lacon: Or, Many Things in a Few Words: Addressed to Those Who Think''}}
{{topquote|Who controls the past controls the future: who controls the present controls the past.|Winston Smith, ''Nineteen Eighty-Four''}}


{{Infobox Deity
{{Infobox Deity
|Name = Blizzard
|Name = Blizzard
|Symbol = [[File:Fluff Accurate.jpg|300px]]
|Symbol = The words "Blizzard Entertainment", or a 90's female anti-hero with a necklace (formerly collar) holding two watermelons (formerly emphasizing her cleavage)
|Alignment = Chaotic Evil
|Alignment = Stupid Chaotic Evil
|Divine Rank = AAA
|Divine Rank = AAA
|Pantheon = Activision
|Pantheon = Activision
|Portfolio =  
|Portfolio =  
|Domains =  
|Domains = Greed, Falls From Grace, Bad Ideas, Terrible Writing (Formerly: Polish, Execution, Unoriginality)
|Home Plane = California
|Home Plane = California, The Cosby Suite
|Worshippers = Gamers,  
|Worshippers = Gamers, [[Whale|Whales]], Nostalgic nerds, streamers
|Favoured Weapon = Exploit worker, Union Breaker, Weinsteinian culture, IP theft
|Daemon Prince = Bobby Kotick (formerly), Bill Gates
|Favoured Weapon = Exploit worker, Union Breaker, Retcons, Virtue Signal, Weinsteinian culture, IP theft, Removal of Creativity
}}
}}
A Blizzard is a unique weather phenomenon that in this form only occurs on the eastern seaboard of North America that, usually between November and February, causes polar winds to stream far more south than usual and massive snowfall and freezing temperatures far below what is normal for these areas, due to the lack of mountain ranges that run from west to east that could block these winds, like in Europe.


__NOTOC__
'''Blizzard Entertainment, Inc.''' on the other hand is an American-owned servant of the PRC and [[/v/|video game]] developer founded in 1991. Consumed by corporate merger shenanigans in 2008, they are now a subsidiary of parent company Activision Blizzard. They are well known in the gaming community for rising to prominence by shamelessly ripping off a long list of things, the most pertinent to [[/tg/]] being the similarity between its flagship franchises and ''[[Warhammer 40k]]''. Blizzard is akin to Apple Inc.: they never ''really'' did anything original, and instead took inspiration/borrowed/stole content from other sources, marketing it as though they're pretty much posterboys of the brand, and took the credit for being "pioneers of said genre". [[Games Workshop|Let it not be said they didn't steal their business/creative practices from the best]].
'''Blizzard Entertainment, Inc.''' is an American-owned servant of the PRC and [[/v/|video game]] developer founded in 1991. Consumed by corporate merger shenanigans in 2008, they are now a subsidiary of parent company Activision Blizzard. They are well known in the gaming community for rising to prominence by shamelessly ripping off a long list of things, the most pertinent to [[/tg/]] being the similarity between its flagship franchises and ''[[Warhammer 40k]]''. Blizzard is akin to Apple Inc.: they never ''really'' did anything original, and instead took inspiration/borrowed/stole content from other sources, marketing it as though they're pretty much posterboys of the brand, and took the credit for being "pioneers of said genre". [[Games Workshop|Let it not be said they didn't steal their business/creative practices from the best]].


While not as skubtastic as [[Kaldor Draigo|the]] [[Matt Ward|other]] [[Grey Knights|things]] [[Ultramarines|present]], it still does cause tensions in /tg/ when brought up. Especially if it concerns one of their games' [[fluff]].
While not as skubtastic as [[Kaldor Draigo|the]] [[Matt Ward|other]] [[Grey Knights|things]] [[Ultramarines|present]], it still does cause tensions in /tg/ when brought up. Especially if it concerns one of their games' [[fluff]].


While Blizzard does [[Blood Ravens|"borrow"]] other people's ideas, there's no denying marketing spends a lot of time and effort studying those ideas, figuring why they are successful, and what parts of these ideas should be improved or removed to make them better. This leads to creating a few extremely well done and successful games, in turn earning a [[Profit|LOT of money]]. While other studios may create revolutionary content, Blizzard is more about ''evolution,'' with their games becoming golden standards of quality, and "easy to learn, hard to master" learning curves. They are also responsible for creating the game-dev meme ''"when it's done,"'' which means they could literally spend a decade on mismanagement  one game, probably spending too much time doing drugs in the office, and another decade to force the dev team into crunch with a shit-ton of balance patches, while management pisses off to GDC but it's to be expected, given all other major game developers are the same, if not [[EA|much, much worse]].
While Blizzard does [[Blood Ravens|"borrow"]] other people's ideas, there's no denying marketing spends a lot of time and effort studying those ideas, figuring why they are successful, and what parts of these ideas should be improved or removed to make them better. This leads to creating a few extremely well done and successful games, in turn earning a [[Profit|LOT of money]]. While other studios may create revolutionary content, Blizzard is more about ''evolution,'' with their games becoming golden standards of quality, and "easy to learn, hard to master" learning curves. They are also responsible for creating the game-dev meme ''"when it's done,"'' which means they could literally spend a decade on mismanagement  one game, probably spending too much time doing drugs in the office or seeking the hottest female inductee they can find to grope, and another decade to force the dev team into crunch with a shit-ton of balance patches, while management pisses off to GDC but it's to be expected, given all other major game developers are the same.
 
[[Skub|There's contention]] between the legions of GW and the hordes of Blizzard in regards to copyrights, who invented which idea first, and whether any ripping-off in fact occurred. Facts seem to lean in the direction of yes, actually. Blizzard's co founder Allen Adham wanted to get the license to the Warhammer Universe however the [https://kotaku.com/how-warcraft-was-almost-a-warhammer-game-and-how-that-5929161 business side of the deal fell through], and the team wasn't keen on working for someone else. The exaggerated features and painted art style of the table top minis was adapted for low poly games. It boggles the mind that there still hasn't been legal trouble for this, and leads many to speculate that there's an off the books deal. Fa/tg/uys tend to accuse Blizzard of ripping off most of [[Games Workshop]]'s content, and they're right. They often write long angry posts about why Blizzard an evil company (which aged far too well, see under "Scandals" below), what was stolen from their precious settings, and why Blizzard games sucks so much. But this is normal operating procedure for khornporation, Ip for the Ip throne after all. This sounds hilarious when you think about Games Workshop, who does steal '''all''' of its content from other settings. Blizzard only concentrates what's awesome about Games Workshop and repackages it after doing minimal rework.
 
'''TL;DR''': Good [[crunch]], meh fluff (their memorable humor is arguably the best part of it), they are the [[Tzeentch]]/[[Slaanesh]] to GW's [[Nurgle]]/[[Khorne]].
 
==Scandals==
 
From the late 2010's onwards, the company has experienced a steadily worsening fall from grace. In its first decade Blizzard was usually the universally beloved grand-daddy of the gaming world, albeit with one skubby exception in the form of Diablo 3 (Its PC version infamously requires an internet connection to play. It doesn't matter how you or your company tries to sell it, an online-only singleplayer game is '''never''' a good idea, despite D3 being one of the VERY few cases of this succeeding. They also had an auction house that just led to all kinds of fucky shit like scams, droprates rarer than winning a lotto and people just going P2W to get the best stuff. Fortunately, they wised up and removed the hell out of it less than 2 years later.). But a number of PR-fuckups, shallow cashgrabs, [[Communism|grievances from the developers that actually make the games]] and - worst of all - the revelation of years of pervasive sexual harassment of staff by higher-ups have left a very sour taste in many people's mouths and all but crushed Blizzard's reputation.
 
In a funny twist of fate, when it comes to their products, Blizzard is currently making a lot of the mistakes Geedubs made before [[Kevin Rountree]] took over. Another notable development is that a lot of the original developers that made games like Starcraft and Warcraft into the nearly universally beloved gems everyone knows have started building their own games studios to compete with Blizzard.
 
Here are some of the biggest failures and crimes;
 
'''November 3, 2018:''' The main-event announcement at BlizzCon 2018 was revealed to be ''Diablo Immortal'', a mobile game, and not the hoped-for ''Diablo IV''. Attendees were livid, and one guy who asked if it was an out-of-season April Fools' joke got more applause than the announcement trailer did. The presenters, displaying an astounding inability to read the room, asked the audibly disappointed crowd "Do you guys not have phones?" The gamer rage made an notable impact on Blizzard's stock price, which took months to recover afterwards.
 
'''Feburary 12, 2019:''' Blizzard fired 800 employees despite reporting record earnings.
 
'''October 6, 2019:''' During a tournament, Chinese [[Hearthstone]] pro-player Blitzchung appeared wearing a gas mask and goggles in a livestream and showed support for the then-recent Hong Kong protests. Near the end of the livestream he said “Liberate Hong Kong. Revolution of our age”, a recognized slogan in the Hong Kong protest. After the interview Blizzard disqualified Blitzchung, stripped him of his prize money, and banned him for a year. Backlash was immediate and intense, with many users deleting their WoW and Battle.net accounts or destroying their physical games while #BoycottBlizzard trended with thousands of retweets.
 
'''October 28, 2019:''' Blizzard announced a $660,000 prize pool for their annual arena/mythic dungeon world tournaments, after previously releasing a set of promotional in-game toys, promising 1/4 of the sales would go towards said prize pool. Most fans believed the money made from the sales would be added to the $500,000 minimum that Blizzard had promised. However, after competing players confronted Blizzard officials, it was revealed that Blizzard had instead chosen to rely entirely on the sales profit for the prize pool, making off with ~$2 million themselves from the other 3/4 of the sales and contributing nothing out of their own pockets. Yet more nerd rage ensued.
 
'''January 28th, 2020:''' Blizzard released the remastered version of Warcraft 3. The game came out in a notoriously unfinished, buggy and featureless state and used advertisements that bordered on being fraudulent (Australian and EU authorities actually filed a lawsuit against Blizzard for misleading advertisements), was missing features the original game had ''13 years ago'', [[RAGE|'''claimed ownership of any custom content created for the game in the ToS in a really, really stupid move that is also illegal under US and EU law''' - especially since Blizzard is a US company]] (It's believed they're still butthurt that DOTA (Defense of the Ancients, originally a custom map for W3) joined up with Valve and they couln't obtain a single penny from the sequel) and even refused to offer refunds, which prompted another lawsuit by EU authorities against them. The game also completely replaced the original Warcraft 3 on the launcher, locking players out of the original unless they have the physical discs plus disc ports and instead prompting them to download the "improved" version. Effectively, they somehow managed to ruin what is considered to be one of the best RTS games ever made, [[FAIL|18 years after it came out]].
 
'''August 4, 2020:''' Employees shared a spreadsheet of salaries and recent pay increases showing that few of them were given raises after crunch, and overtime. Many employees, despite working at one of the biggest video game companies in America, were struggling to pay rent and using the company's free coffee as an appetite suppressant as they cut meals. Apparently that 5-year service sword does not also pay rent.
 
'''October 16th, 2020:''' Blizzard announced that they would put Starcraft 2 into maintenance mode, ceasing any content updates in the future. This has left a lot of players angry and sad, especially since Starcraft 2 is one of the very last remaining RTSes with a decently sized playerbase and competitive scene.
 
'''November 20th, 2021:''' Blizzard releases two transmog sets for World of Warcraft: Shadowlands with the Celestial Observer's Ensemble and the Baby Murloc Satch-Shells.  While both were praised for their design, this release caused rancor among the community for being hidden behind a paywall. The former has also been considered better made, or at least more detailed, than the raid tier sets in Patch 9.2, causing further complaints. 
 
'''June 2, 2022:''' The release of ''Diablo Immortal'' is met with overwhelming outcry, as it proves to be a thinly-veiled pay to win game. The micropayment system for loot boxes is not very evident or necessary in the early stages but, as the end of the game approaches, paying becomes a requirement... almost essential to keep moving forward.
 
'''October 3rd, 2022:''' Servers of Overwatch are shut down to push all players towards playing the sequel releasing the next day.


[[Skub|There's contention]] between the legions of GW and the hordes of Blizzard in regards to copyrights, who invented which idea first, and whether any ripping-off in fact occurred. Facts seem to lean in the direction of yes, actually. Blizzard's co founder Allen Adham wanted to get the license to the Warhammer Universe however the [https://kotaku.com/how-warcraft-was-almost-a-warhammer-game-and-how-that-5929161 business side of the deal fell through], and the team wasn't keen on working for someone else. The exaggerated features and painted art style of the table top minis was adapted for low poly games. It boggles the mind that there still hasn't been legal trouble for this, and leads many to speculate that there's an off the books deal. Fa/tg/uys tend to accuse Blizzard of ripping off most of [[Games Workshop]]'s content, and they're right. They often write long angry posts about why Blizzard an evil company, what was stolen from their precious settings, and why Blizzard games sucks so much. But this is normal operating procedure for khornporation, Ip for the Ip throne after all. This sounds hilarious when you think about Games Workshop, who does steal '''all''' of its content from other settings. Blizzard only concentrates what's awesome about James Workshop and repackages it after doing minimal rework.  
'''May 16th, 2023:''' Overwatch 2 has its single-player PvE mode cancelled, the one thing that was established as the central feature of the up to this point tepidly received sequel to the team shooter. Fan reception has been overwhelmingly negative as not only was the original Overwatch allegedly killed for this single-player mode, the sequel is now just a barely disguised shopfront for exceedingly expensive skins for the hero characters and nothing else.  


If you ever meet a raging fan, crying about plagiarism, <s>ignore the fucking troll</s> [[lulz|throw oil on the fire and get a-trolling]]. Alternatively, keep raging about [[The Ultimate Necron Cheese List|Necron Flyer Lists]]/[[rage|Terran Hellion Drop]] imbalance.
'''June 13th, 2023:''' Turns out, they ''did'' some work on Overwatch 2's PvE mode. But here's the catch; they only made the first few missions, or "levels". So, to access them, [[What|you gotta pay an extra $15. Even at the face of backlash]], Activision just can't stop being the shittiest company on earth it seems.


'''TL;DR''': Good [[crunch]], meh fluff (their memorable humor is arguably the best part of it), they are the [[Tzeentch]] to GW's [[Nurgle]].
===The sexual harassment lawsuits===


==Scandals==
This refers to a series of 2021 sex crime lawsuits against Activision Blizzard regarding offences that go back several years. Due to the severity of the crimes/charges and their effects along with the related investigation being ongoing, they've been given their own section on this page.
On November 3, 2018 during Blizcon, Diablo Immortals was announced as a mobile game. Gamers were livid, with one asking if it was an out of season april fools joke. The Gamer rage made an impact on stock price with it taking months to recover after.  
 
'''July 22nd, 2021:''' California's Department of Fair Employment filed a civil lawsuit against Activision Blizzard for sexual harassment of numerous employees - especially female employees, some of the incidents going back years. The final catalyst was the suicide of female employee, Kerri Moynihan, identified as one of the victims of said harassment and even speculation that the harassment contributed to her fatal decision. According to the lawsuit, the culprits are from several levels in the company (former Senior Creative Director Alex Afrasiabi and former CTO Ben Kilgore are among them). The charges include unwanted groping, posting intimate pictures without the subject's consent, hidden cameras in toilets and more. Worse, other execs knew of the abuses but did nothing. The situation wasn't helped when several Blizzard employees lashed out at several high-profile WoW commentators and streamers such as Asmongold for criticizing these atrocities, trying to shift blame onto them despite those streamers having nothing to do with the company or the abuse. With morale at an all-time low and widespread stress, the development of new projects was put on a roughly-two-month hiatus.  
 
'''July 28th, 2021:''' After delivering an open letter to upper management, a portion of Blizzard staff staged a walkout protest that gained considerable news coverage. There was increasing support for staff to unionize, with Blizzard's Board of Directors responding by consulting the same legal firm whose lawyers prevented Amazon's staff from unionizing.
 
'''August 3rd, 2021''' Sponsors started to turn against Blizzard and executive-level employees, such as J. Allen Brack and Jesse Meschuk, left the company (unclear whether it was voluntary resignations or the standard sugar-coated "golden parachute" dismissals for top level business execs).  Brack and Meschuk are both among those named in the lawsuit, and Brack was succeeded by "co-leaders" Jen Oneal and Mike Ybarra following his departure (with further accusations leveled that Brack left to deliberately avoid being confronted over knowing about the abuses but not stopping them).
 
'''August 25th, 2021''' The California Department of Fair Employment leveled charges of obstruction via witness tampering - requiring employees to speak with Activision Blizzard execs ahead of contacting the DFEH, amending the complaint and even destroying evidence by shredding records from the HR archives. This was added to the lawsuit and could take the case from a civil lawsuit to a criminal lawsuit.


On Feburary 12, 2019 Blizzard fired 800 employees after reporting record earnings.  
'''August 26th-27th, 2021''': Characters and places named after developers from the lawsuit are renamed or removed from Overwatch and World of Warcraft. Examples include the Overwatch character Jesse McCree and World of Warcraft's Draenei city Mac'aree - both named for former WoW lead level designer Jesse McCree, being renamed to Cole Cassidy (in a clever move, "Jesse McCree" was retconned to be Cole's criminal alias) and Ere'dath respectively.


On October 6, 2019, during a tournament, Blitzchung appeared wearing a gas mask and goggles in a live stream and showed support to the Hong Kong Protests. Near the end of the live stream he said “Liberate Hong Kong. Revolution of our age”, a recognized slogan in the Hong Kong protest. After the interview Blizzard disqualified Blitzchung and stripped him of his prize money, and banned him for a year. Backlash was immediate, users deleted Blizzard accounts and destroyed games. #BoycottBlizzard trended with thousands retweeting.  
'''September 14th, 2021''': A lawsuit is filed against Activision Blizzard accusing them of union-busting and worker intimidation. The latter in particular based on the company executives' response to the sexual harassment lawsuit.


August 4, 2020 Employees shared a spreadsheet of salaries and recent pay increases showing that few were given raises after chrunch, and overtime. Many employees, dispite working at one of the biggest video game companies were struggling to pay rent and using the company's free coffee as an appetite suppressant as they cut meals. Apparently that 5 year service sword does not also pay rent.  
'''September 20th, 2021''':  Activision Blizzard is subjected to a federal investigation as the Securities and Exchange Commission gets involved over how the company has handled employee allegations of workplace discrimination, sexual harassment, and sexual misconduct. Bobby Kotick and several other senior executives were given subpoenas, with the court date pending.


==Franchises relevant to /tg/==
==Franchises relevant to /tg/==


*'''''[[Warcraft|WarCraft]]:''''' A real-time strategy (RTS) series; initially [[Orc]]s vs [[Human]]s but then later games added more races. Then it became a [[MMORPG]] with [[World of Warcraft|all kinds of crazy shit]]. Particularly notable to /tg/ because it spilled over into multiple genres: There were [[World of Warcraft: The Roleplaying Game|two separate editions of a ''D&D'' campaign setting]], a physical [[Card_Game#Collectible_Card_Games|trading card game]] and has its own board games too.
*'''''[[Warcraft|WarCraft]]:''''' A real-time strategy (RTS) series; initially [[Orc]]s vs [[Human]]s but then later games added more races. Then it became a [[MMORPG]] with [[World of Warcraft|all kinds of crazy shit]]. Particularly notable to /tg/ because it spilled over into multiple genres: There were [[World of Warcraft: The Roleplaying Game|two separate editions of a ''D&D'' campaign setting]], a physical [[Card_Game#Collectible_Card_Games|trading card game]] and has its own board games too.
*'''''[[StarCraft]]:''''' RTS IN SPHESSSSS! <s>[[Space Marines]]</s> [[Imperial Guard|Terrans]] vs [[Tyranids|Zerg]] vs [[Eldar|Protoss]]. Beyond being the national sport of Korea, the ''StarCraft'' franchise has its own board game and has its own unique version of ''[[Risk]]'' which alters the rules just enough so that it isn't merely a re-skinned version of ''Risk''.
*'''''[[StarCraft]]:''''' RTS IN SPHESSSSS! <s>[[Space Marines]]</s> [[Imperial Guard|Terrans]] vs [[Tyranids|Zerg]] vs [[Eldar|Protoss]]. Beyond being the (former) national sport of Korea, the ''StarCraft'' franchise has its own board game and has its own unique version of ''[[Risk]]'' which alters the rules just enough so that it isn't merely a re-skinned version of ''Risk''.
*'''''[[Diablo]]:''''' [[Grimdark]] [[Dark Fantasy]] setting involving the wars between [[Angel]]s and [[Demon]]s, and also not actually made by Blizzard. It was made instead by an outfit named Condor, which got bought out by Davidson & Associates, which also bought out a little outfit named Chaos Studios. Then, Chaos Studios got renamed '''Blizzard''', and Condor was renamed '''Blizzard North''', which is why Diablo ended up being playable on battle.net. Meanwhile, another group of guys named Synergistic Software got bought out by Sierra On-Line, which was in turn acquired by CUC International, which gobbled up Davidson & Associates, which was how the job of making Diablo's expansion pack, Hellfire, got farmed out to Synergistic. However, Condor and Blizzard both had veto power over Synergistic's ideas, and Condor, which was already working on Diablo II, didn't want anything to be in Hellfire that was also going to be in D2, which is why the Barbarian and secret cow quest had to be cut and why Hellfire couldn't be played over Battle.net even though the code totally worked. There was a [[fail|short-lived]] attempt to port the Diablo franchise into both [[Advanced Dungeons & Dragons#AD&D 2nd Edition|2nd Edition]] and [[Dungeons & Dragons 3rd Edition|3rd Edition]] ''Dungeons and Dragons'', though the results were not particularly successful or well-remembered.
*'''''[[Diablo]]:''''' [[Grimdark]] [[Dark Fantasy]] setting involving the wars between [[Angel]]s and [[Demon]]s, and also not actually made by Blizzard. It was made instead by an outfit named Condor, which got bought out by Davidson & Associates, which also bought out a little outfit named Chaos Studios. Then, Chaos Studios got renamed '''Blizzard''', and Condor was renamed '''Blizzard North''', which is why Diablo ended up being playable on battle.net. Meanwhile, another group of guys named Synergistic Software got bought out by Sierra On-Line, which was in turn acquired by CUC International, which gobbled up Davidson & Associates, which was how the job of making Diablo's expansion pack, Hellfire, got farmed out to Synergistic. However, Condor and Blizzard both had veto power over Synergistic's ideas, and Condor, which was already working on Diablo II, didn't want anything to be in Hellfire that was also going to be in D2, which is why the Barbarian and secret cow quest had to be cut and why Hellfire couldn't be played over Battle.net even though the code totally worked. There was a [[fail|short-lived]] attempt to port the Diablo franchise into both [[Advanced Dungeons & Dragons#AD&D 2nd Edition|2nd Edition]] and [[Dungeons & Dragons 3rd Edition|3rd Edition]] ''Dungeons and Dragons'', though the results were not particularly successful or well-remembered.
*'''''Hearthstone:''''' A digital collectible card game. Think ''[[Magic: The Gathering|MtG]]'' but all the depth and complexity got replaced with RNG bullshit. Also it only costs you one kidney to gather a good card collection rather than [[Forgeworld|both, one leg, one testicle, and the soul of your firstborn child]].
*'''''Hearthstone:''''' A digital collectible card game. Think ''[[Magic: The Gathering|MtG]]'' but all the depth and complexity got replaced with RNG bullshit. Also it only costs you one kidney to gather a good card collection rather than [[Forgeworld|both, one leg, one testicle, and the soul of your firstborn child]] , but Blizzard seems dedicated to catch back on that missed profit by adding more content that cannot be bought with in-game currency (gold) and going the way of the battlepass...wait, what do you mean they have two passes?


==Blizzard things that aren't (/tg/ related) rip-offs==
==Blizzard things that aren't (/tg/ related) rip-offs==
In 1992, they made ''Battle Chess'' for the Commodore 64 & MS-DOS, and also a ''[[Lord of the Rings]]'' [[RPG]] for the Amiga.  The ''LotR'' game was supposed to be just the first book, with two sequels, but they never got around to finishing it. They made ''RPM Racing'' (allegedly the first American-made SNES game) and ''Rock n' Roll Racing'' for the Super Nintendo and the Sega Megadrive but that's [[/v/]] shit. They also made a side-scrolling Superman beat 'em up and a shitty Justice League fighting game for a dose of [[/co/]] crap too. There's also their game ''The Lost Vikings'', a platforming puzzle game where you control three [[vikings]], each of them with their own special abilities (Erik the Swift can run faster and jump higher than the other two and also bash through walls with his horned helmet, Baleog the Fierce can shoot an arrow and kill enemies with his sword and Olaf the Stout can block with shield which he can also use like a hang-glider.) Since the game has vikings in it, /tg/ might be interested in it due to their [[Warriors of Chaos|viking fetish]]. A sequel was also made, ''The Lost Vikings 2'', which added two more characters, a [[werewolf]] named Fang and Scorch the [[dragon]], but it's kind of a rarity. Fast forward to more recent times, trying to cash in on the growing MOBA-craze, Blizzard developed ''Heroes of the Storm'' by throwing all their decent franchises into a blender to make one mediocre new game, which is ironic considering highly customized user-made ''StarCraft'' and ''WarCraft III'' maps pretty much spawned the MOBA genre in the first place. Blizz's most recent success is the first-person shooter ''Overwatch''. Though hilariously similar to ''[[Team Fortress 2]]'' and [[Blood Ravens|drawing upon]] various sci-fi and fantasy sources, it presents a somewhat unique [[noblebright]] setting and characters that are mostly [[/d/|fapbait/schlickbait]].
In 1992, they made ''Battle Chess'' for the Commodore 64 & MS-DOS, and also a ''[[Lord of the Rings]]'' [[RPG]] for the Amiga.  The ''LotR'' game was supposed to be just the first book, with two sequels, but they never got around to finishing it. They made ''RPM Racing'' (allegedly the first American-made SNES game) and ''Rock n' Roll Racing'' for the Super Nintendo and the Sega Megadrive but that's [[/v/]] shit. They also made a side-scrolling Superman beat 'em up and a shitty Justice League fighting game for a dose of [[/co/]] crap too. There's also their game ''The Lost Vikings'', a platforming puzzle game where you control three [[vikings]], each of them with their own special abilities (Erik the Swift can run faster and jump higher than the other two and also bash through walls with his horned helmet, Baleog the Fierce can shoot an arrow and kill enemies with his sword and Olaf the Stout can block with shield which he can also use like a hang-glider.) Since the game has vikings in it, /tg/ might be interested in it due to their [[Warriors of Chaos|viking fetish]]. A sequel was also made, ''The Lost Vikings 2'', which added two more characters, a [[werewolf]] named Fang and Scorch the [[dragon]], but it's kind of a rarity. Fast forward to more recent times, trying to cash in on the growing MOBA-craze, Blizzard developed ''Heroes of the Storm'' by throwing all their decent franchises into a blender to make one mediocre new game, which is ironic considering highly customized user-made ''StarCraft'' and ''WarCraft III'' maps pretty much spawned the MOBA genre in the first place, even more ironic is that this attempt pretty much collapsed in a matter of years while those original MOBAs are still active over a decade later. Blizz's most recent success is the first-person shooter ''Overwatch''. Though hilariously similar to ''[[Team Fortress 2]]'' and [[Blood Ravens|drawing upon]] various sci-fi and fantasy sources, it presents a somewhat unique (albeit poorly fleshed-out) [[noblebright]] setting and characters that are mostly [[/d/|fapbait/schlickbait]]. While weighed down by the growing controversy of lootboxes (which, to their credit, was never necessary to get anything critical in the game, just cosmetics), it managed to see some measure of success for a few years. Overwatch's sequel - or update, to be more precise - failed to live up to any of that [[hype]] between an invasive battle pass and a failure to address any of the growing flaws in the gameplay. In fact, it made its own issues including - and we shit you not - [[What|reducing the entire playable roster to]] [[SJW|a number of racial and cultural diversity quotas to fulfill]] [[Fail|rather than improving the game experience]].
 
==Micro$oft buyout - [[Star Wars|a new hope]](?)==
<It was a cold January morning in the year 22.M3 when the gaming community was awoken to the news most unusual and surprising. As it turned out - big daddy Microsoft (or more specifically it's CEO Phil Spencer) decided that Blizzard's portfolio of IPs looked mighty fine and that they should take it, and so they did for about 68 billion dollars. To put that into reference, this cost close to ''ten times'' as much as their acquisition of Zenimax (Owners of Bethesda alongside a few other major studios) last year. The news media went crazy about this and the rumour mill began to churn almost immediately at this shakeup. While the transfer of assets and ownership is still not done as of the time of this writing (23.01.2022) and will be finished at the latest by 20.06.2023. We can try to surmise a few things that are known from the technical side or the interviews with Spencer.
 
Firstly, it has been made clear and in no uncertain terms that the gaming industry's most despicable scumbag [[Slaanesh|Bobby Cocktick]] will be getting the boot as soon as the deal finalizes with Spencer taking over - ''a mighty cry can be heard ringing out across the land~'' -khm- so that is an immediate plus since the guy presided over the aforementioned scandals while basically not giving a shit about the victims or the conduct plus, you know, he stole his mother's vintage ashtray and sold it so that tells you all about his character that you need to know (and in his last interview with the workers he basically tried to save his face and protect the corporation instead of manning up and admitting to the wrongdoings, yeah...good riddance asshole). Unfortunately, he'll still get his artificer golden parachute to allow him to live out his life by either starting up his own company built upon skinner boxes or (ideally) living on the fringes of society, feeding upon the tons of money he made off his bullshit.
 
Secondly, Microsoft could finally put a stop to the batshit bro-culture and sexual harassment that appears to have become a regularity at Blizzard if for no other reason than [[Tzeentch|good optics post-acquisition]] (it helps that the offenders and their associates have already been purged from the company).  But hey, if it solves the issues all the better. Also, if one is to believe an interview with Spencer, many studios that have been sent to slave in the CoD mines may be liberated and allowed to go work on their own games (Singularity, Crash Bandicoot, Spyro) while also making sure that Blizzard's own original stuff like Warcraft, Starcraft and others get proper attention.
 
However - it must also be noted that 'ol Microsoft also has a raging boner for making money that is somewhat tempered with business pragmatism which did not prevent them to jump onto lootbox bandwagon or engage in microtransactions since the existence of GamePass has made them enough money to alleviate the need. Also worth remembering that while Spencer may love Blizzard's oldie games, not only are all of the staffers who made those classics long gone by now, he is still a CEO of a corporation whose primary goal is to please investors by making that green arrow go up. If a franchise does not seem like it will generate much [[Teef|money]] it will be thrown back into the dustbin.
 
All that being said - this may represent the best and last hope Blizzard has to get itself out of the gutter and get halfway decent again. A good indicator of this will be how Bethesda will fare with Starfield and Elder Scrolls VI, but a cautious optimist may surmise that we may get games that will, at worst, be merely fine which after the debacles of the new 20s would alone be a big fucking improvement to boot. It should be noted to that the deal will only be finalized in July 2023, and until then may be blocked by antitrust laws or compromised by other factors...
 
And sure enough, [[Not As Planned|they got blocked by the UK]]. Not the EU like we thought, but specifically the United Kingdom. It still rests upon the Cloud Gaming monopoly they claim XBox has, but since it’s a single country all Microsoft has to do is not produce games for the UK anymore and they’ll likely just continue with the merger. So… I guess the merger is still happening?
 
Whatever it ends up looking like, it couldn’t prepare us for what happened next: [https://www.gamespot.com/articles/upcoming-wow-quest-involving-a-characters-abuse-has-players-demanding-change/1100-6515272/ Them releasing a quest in World of Warcraft that made you complicit in the abuse and rape of a character], all in the name of [[Derp|keeping the timeline in order]]. How Microsoft will allow the merger to happen after this, we don’t know yet, but one things clear. They took one good look at the Pinkerton incident at Wizards and said [[That Guy|”Hold my beer.”]] More as the situation updates, but yeah this looks to be the straw that broke the camel’s back.
 
==[[Skub|An unbiased comparison]]==
[[File:Fluff Accurate.jpg|thumb|300px|right]]


==[[Skub|Legitimately unbiased comparison]]==
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Both of the companies' products have a bevy of similarities and differences that can be factually assessed without any real bias. Beginning here is a <s>comprehensive</s> tiny list of the comparisons between popular topics of much [[RAGE|debate]].
Games Workshop and Blizzard Entertainment, or more specifically Warhammer 40k and World of Warcraft respectively, exhibit similarities and differences that can be factually assessed without any real bias. Click the Expand button to the right to see a <s>comprehensive</s> tiny list of the comparisons between popular topics of much [[RAGE|debate]].
 
Note this applies to their settings, as the comparison of companies is moot given Blizzard has sunk from its once-soaring heights to a depth far, far lower than GW ever did.  For all of GW's many flaws including money grabbing, bouts of discrimination and litigation (all which Blizzard is also guilty of), at least GW never fomented sexual assault or induced a suicide. And unlike WoW, Warhammer is growing more and more popular and GW revenue is rising.  Oh 90's and 2000's Blizzard, we miss you so.


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===[[Orks]] vs. [[Orcs]]===
===[[Orks]] vs. [[Orc#Warcraft|Orcs]]===


While it is true that the light green skin, angry porcine face with lots of tusks, and heavyset jawlines are traits shared across the two species of Orcoids, that's about where the similarities end. While [[Orks]] are brutal, fun-loving omnicidal maniacs who love the [[Dakka]] and only momentarily hesitate to shoot something if it's sufficiently green and orky, [[orcs]] in Blizzard's universe actually eventually filled the unique role of being good guys. For the most part, anyway, back when they were first through the portals they were extremely bloodthirsty but as time has gone on they've settled down nicely. This is actually a first, as no other universe is really known for having Orcs who can be described as friendly (''[[Strike Legion]]'' is a good example though as well as the elder scrolls). In fact the Orcs of Blizzard's universe are the glue of their faction, serving as the lynch-pin by which the other races come together as one Horde.  
While it is true that the light green skin, angry porcine face with lots of tusks, and heavyset jawlines are traits shared across the two species of Orcoids, that's about where the similarities end. While [[Orks]] are brutal, fun-loving homicidal maniacs who love [[Dakka]] and only momentarily hesitate to shoot something if it's sufficiently green and orky, [[orcs]] in Blizzard's universe actually eventually filled the unique role of being good guys. For the most part, anyway. Back when they were first through the portals they were extremely bloodthirsty but as time has gone on they've settled down nicely. This is actually a first, as few fictional settings are really known for having Orcs who can be described as friendly (''[[Strike Legion]]'' and Elder Scrolls being two other notable examples). In fact, the Orcs of Blizzard's universe are the glue of their faction, serving as the lynch-pin by which the other races come together as one Horde.  


Similarly, <span style='color:green;font-size:115%'>Orkzes iz da biggest an' da strongest.</span>, with the lowly boy far more buff than your standard human and only getting taller and taller as they age. Orcs, while significantly physically imposing, are roughly the same height as average humans, and are dwarfed by their [[Minotaur|Tauren]] allies.  
Similarly, <span style='color:green;font-size:115%'>Orkzes iz da biggest an' da strongest.</span>. A lowly Ork boy is far more buff and much heavier than your standard human, and he only gets bigger as he ages. Orcs, while significantly physically imposing, are roughly the same height as average humans, and are dwarfed by their [[Minotaur|Tauren]] allies.  


Though it should be noted, that at current state Orcs spawned a total of three [[BBEG]]s of the setting, including the first Lich King himself, while most other races, except dragons and (technically) draenei, have their count on one or zero. The Orks, on the other hand, ''are'' the BBEGs.
In addition, Orcs spawned a total of three [[BBEG]]s of the setting, including the first Lich King himself, while most other races, except dragons and (technically) Draenei, have their count on one or zero. The Orks, on the other hand, ''are'' the BBEGs.


===Terran Marines vs Space Marines===  
===Terran Marines vs Space Marines===  


This should be somewhat obvious. Space Marines, as deigned by [[GW]], are one-man armies, raised from a young age to be killing machines and then augmented to become superhuman monstrosities. Terran Marines, by comparison, are pitiful. If we're being very generous, they're an analogue for the [[Stormtrooper|Tempestus corps.]], but with a worse track record. They are literally a case of the government or rebel faction finding every hick and criminal they can and shoving them in a brainwashing tank, slapping power armor on them, pumping them with drugs, handing them a gun, and telling them to [[Tarpit|keep shooting until it stops moving]]. And, considering everything in the ''StarCraft'' universe can pierce through tanks and [[/m/|giant mechs]], not to mention some power armor, those marines aren't likely to survive their first deployment. So, to put it simply, Terran Marines are really closer to Guardsmen or Penal Legionnaires, except with better guns and even more drugs.  And like the Guard, they have really nice tanks and fantastic artillery.
This should be somewhat obvious. Space Marines, as imagined by [[GW]], are one-man armies, raised from a young age to be killing machines and then augmented to become superhuman monstrosities. Terran Marines, by comparison, are pitiful. If we're being very generous, they're an analogue for the [[Stormtrooper|Tempestus corps.]], but with a worse track record. They are literally a case of the government or rebel faction finding every hick and criminal they can and shoving them in a brainwashing tank, slapping power armor on them, pumping them with drugs, handing them a gun, and telling them to [[Tarpit|keep shooting until it stops moving]]. And, considering everything in the ''StarCraft'' universe can pierce through tanks and [[/m/|giant mechs]], not to mention some power armor, those marines aren't likely to survive their first deployment. So, to put it simply, Terran Marines are really closer to Guardsmen or Penal Legionnaires, except with better equipment and even more drugs.  Although like the Guard, they do have really nice tanks and fantastic artillery.


===Zergs vs [[Tyranids]]===
===Zerg vs [[Tyranids]]===


Both are races of ravenous, rapidly evolving beasts under the control of a distant supreme intelligence, both use biotechnology instead of tools, most of their units are fast, deadly, fragile and numerous, and they even look almost the same. The last part is actually to GW's shame, since they all but copy-pasted the Zerg appearance into Tyranids in 3rd edition, mostly to capitalize on the ''StarCraft'' financial success (yes, they were that greedy and shameless even back then).  
Both are races of ravenous, rapidly evolving beasts under the control of a distant supreme intelligence, both use biotechnology instead of tools, most of their units are fast, deadly, fragile and numerous, and they even look almost the same. The last part is no accident, since GW all but copy-pasted the Zerg appearance into Tyranids in 3rd edition, mostly to capitalize on ''StarCraft'''s financial success (yes, they were that greedy and shameless even back then).  


Secondly, while the Tyranids' hive mind is their collective consciousness, the Zerg have actual physical entities with emotions and personalities to rule them - from the lowly Overlords, to the Cerebrates, to the Overmind itself (or Overlords - Hive Queens - Broodmothers - The Queen of Blades after Kerrigan took over control), and with that they also get some actual character development and political struggles in their ranks - something 'Nids solely lack as their only real agenda revolves around planet-hopping towards that psychic light known as the [[Golden Throne]], all the while eating everything on the way. Even though most Cerebrates merged into the new Overmind and were killed by Kerrigan (and her puppets) during Brood War, the real reason that they never showed up again was that their hierarchy was similar enough to the 'Nids that the Cerebrates were killed off off-screen and cut from ''StarCraft II'' as a way of [http://comments.deviantart.com/1/359035454/2977652201 Blizzard playing nice with Games Workshop].
Secondly, while the Tyranid hive mind is their collective consciousness, the Zerg have actual physical entities with emotions and personalities to rule them - from the lowly Overlords, to the Cerebrate, and even to The Queen of Blades after Kerrigan took over control. With that they also get some actual character development and political struggles in their ranks - something 'Nids solely lack as individual organisms are simply tools of the Hive Mind, whose only motivation is to feed. Even though most Cerebrates merged into the new Overmind and were subsequently killed by Kerrigan (and her puppets) during Brood War, the real reason that they never showed up again was that their hierarchy was similar enough to the 'Nids that the Cerebrates were killed off off-screen and cut from ''StarCraft II'' as a way of [http://comments.deviantart.com/1/359035454/2977652201 Blizzard playing nice with Games Workshop].


Zergs also do not eat worlds like Tyranids do - only conquer and colonize them, which automatically lowers their Eldritch Unstoppable Evil level by half.
The Zerg also do not consume entire worlds like Tyranids do. They only conquer and colonize them, which automatically lowers their Eldritch Unstoppable Evil level by half.


There's also a variant of Zerg called the Primal Zerg, which have a strictly more reptilian/mammalian aesthetic and are notably individuals that operate in Packs. Despite being individuals, some with marked intelligence, they're all basically just focused on eating strong prey and surviving and have no ambitions or desires beyond that one dimension.
There's also a variant of Zerg called the Primal Zerg, which have a strictly more reptilian/mammalian aesthetic and are notably individuals that operate in Packs. Despite being individuals, some with marked intelligence, they're all basically just focused on eating strong prey and surviving and have no ambitions or desires beyond that one dimension.


===Burning Legion vs [[Daemon#Warhammer_40,000|Daemons of Chaos]]===
===Burning Legion vs [[Daemon#Warhammer_40,000|Daemons of Chaos]]===
Both are evil demons, who came from the [[Eye of Terror|dimension of magic]] and want to [[Exterminatus|destroy everything]]. The Burning Legion, however, is everything but chaotic, and is highly organized and structured, and even after their dark god Sargeras got himself killed, they managed to keep their shit together. Moreover, unlike Chaos Daemons, who are the manifestations of emotions and magic, creatures of the Legion are mostly normal sapient biological beings, transformed through overuse of fel magic, or artificial constructs, enlivened by said fel magic. Unlike [[Chaos Gods]], who want the eternal conflict just for the sake of it (which makes sense, given they are empowered by emotions, and conflicts stimulate more emotions), the Burning Legion have clear goals, which are: 1) Gather all the magic, 2) Use it to destroy the Creation, 3) Build a new, better one. 4) [[Meme|???]], 5) [[Profit|PROFIT]]!
Both are evil demons, who came from the [[Eye of Terror|dimension of magic]] and want to [[Exterminatus|destroy everything]]. The Burning Legion, however, is highly organized and structured. Even after their dark god Sargeras got himself killed, they managed to keep their shit together. Moreover, unlike Chaos Daemons, who are the manifestations of emotions and magic, creatures of the Legion are mostly normal sapient biological beings, transformed through overuse of fel magic, or artificial constructs, enlivened by said fel magic. Unlike [[Chaos Gods]], who want the eternal conflict just for the sake of it (which makes sense, given they are empowered by emotions, and conflicts stimulate more emotions), the Burning Legion have clear goals, which are: 1) Gather all the magic, 2) Use it to destroy the Creation, 3) Hope a new, better one comes along. 4) [[Meme|???]], 5) [[Profit|PROFIT]]!
 
===Protoss and Draenei vs [[Eldar]]===
You fucking kidding me? OK, let's compare them.  All three are superpowered races with small numbers, long lifespan, have tech, superior to everything in their setting (save Xel'Naga, Titans and Necrons respectively).  And that's it.  Protoss are tough as adamantium bunkers, can warp in infantry almost instantly any place with an energy field, are fast as a slime, hit like every fucking one of them is armed with a tank cannon or a [[Power Fist]] and tend to move in big unkillable all-destroying deathballs of doom.  The Draenei have a natural affinity for magic of any kind, and tend to use it in all their technology, and are less durable than Protoss and slower than Eldar but faster than the former and tougher than the latter.  The Eldar are fast as hell, can be killed by a mean look, and tend to zoom around in small groups at mind-blowing speed, surgically shooting/cutting down priority targets before retreating to the safety of cover. Culture-wise Protoss are closer to [[Tau]] than to Eldar, with a rigid caste system and hierarchy, and the highly collectivist ideology of the Khala, which is actually almost the same as the Tau's Greater Good. From this perspective Dark Templar are basically the Farsight enclave, who told the Khala and its Ethe... I meant Judicators to fuck off and left to build their new home without that brainwashing <s>pheromones</s> psi-internet bullshit. Oh, wait, the Tau Empire was introduced 3 years after the release of ''StarCraft''... OOPS!  Meanwhile the Draenei also have a few cultural parallels to the Tau as well as Jews (given their history of persecution, clear Exodus parallels highly religious culture and seeking a homeland).


===Protoss vs [[Eldar]]===
All three also fell out of their golden ages pretty hard, though that's about where the similarities end. The Eldar caused their empire's fall entirely on their own, between all the murder-fucking and general debauchery that was getting out of hand, to such a point that not only did it reduce their species' population to a pitiful fraction of what it once was, but also damned each and every Eldar soul that exists (or has yet to exist) by creating one of the four Chaos Gods responsible for a shit ton of the Grimdark in 40k. Even though the Eldar are fighting against all odds, and making ''some'' progress with the birth of Ynnead, the chance of them actually ever returning to a semblance of their former glory is about as likely as the God-Emperor of Mankind leaping from the Golden Throne and declaring the Imperium of Man a Xenos-inclusive interfaith democracy.  The Protoss are only partially responsible for their fall from power, as the internal strife between the Judicator Caste and Templar Caste didn't exactly help prepare them for when the Zerg invaded their homeworld of Aiur. The surviving Protoss as a whole had to evacuate to Shakuras, where their Dark Templar kin granted them sanctuary (in that kind of arrogant "look at how cool and caring we are ''despite'' you exiling our kind" mindset).  Also unlike the Eldar, the Protoss are notably reclaiming their former glory. Having made buddies with the Dark Templar, Purifiers (sentient Protoss AI), Tal'Darim (to the Protoss the way Dark Eldar are to the Craftworlders), the collective Protoss race took back Aiur and is currently rebuilding a unified homeworld for all Protoss. The Draenei are somewhere between the two, as their fall was due to some of their race the Titan Sargeras' offer while those who refused him became the Draenei and fled with the help of the Naaru.  Some of these Draenei went on the offensive against the Legion while others fled elsewhere to start a new life. It also took ages, but now all Draenei are finally on the offensive against the Legion.  Given the demons' devastation of their homeworld Argus, it's unlikely they can reclaim it, but they're determined to make a fresh start.
You fucking kidding me? OK, both are psychic race with small numbers and long lifespan, both have tech, superior to everything in their setting (save Necrons and Xel'Naga respectively), and both are quite arrogant about their superiority. And that's it. Protoss are tough as adamantium bunkers, can warp in infantry almost instantly any place with an energy field, are fast as a slime, hit like every fucking one of them is armed with a tank cannon or a [[Power Fist]] and tend to move in big unkillable all-destroying deathballs of doom, while Eldar are fast as hell, can be killed by a mean look, and tend to zoom around in small groups at mind-blowing speed, surgically shooting/cutting down priority targets before retreating to the safety of cover. Culture-wise Protoss are closer to [[Tau]] than to Eldar, with a rigid caste system and hierarchy, and the highly collectivist ideology of the Khala, which is actually almost the same as the Tau's Greater Good. From this perspective Dark Templar are basically the Farsight enclave, who told the Khala and its Ethe... I meant Judicators to fuck off and left to build their new home without that brainwashing <s>pheromones</s> psi-internet bullshit. Oh, wait, the Tau Empire was introduced 3 years after the release of ''StarCraft''... OOPS!


Both the Protoss and Eldar also fell out of their golden ages pretty hard, though that's about where the similarities end. The Eldar caused their empire's fall entirely on their own, between all the murder-fucking and general debauchery that was getting out of hand, to such a point that not only did it reduce their species' population to a pitiful fraction of what it once was, but also damned each and every Eldar soul that exists (or has yet to exist) by creating one of the four Chaos Gods responsible for a shit ton of the Grimdark in 40k. Even though the Eldar are fighting against all odds, and making ''some'' progress with the birth of Ynnead, the chance of them actually ever returning to a semblance of their former glory is about as likely as the God-Emperor of Mankind leaping from the Golden Throne and declaring the Imperium of Man a Xenos-inclusive democracy. The Protoss, on the otherhand, are only partially responsible for their fall from power, as the internal strife between the Judicator Caste and Templar Caste didn't exactly help prepare them for when the Zerg invaded their homeworld of Aiur. The surviving Protoss as a whole had to evacuate to Shakuras, where their Dark Templar kin granted them sanctuary (in that kind of arrogant "look at how cool and caring we are ''despite'' you exiling our kind" mindset). Also unlike the Eldar, the Protoss are notably reclaiming their former glory. Having made buddies with the Dark Templar, Purifiers (sentient Protoss AI), Tal'Darim (to the Protoss the way Dark Eldar are to the Craftworlders), the collective Protoss race took back Aiur and is currently rebuilding a unified homeworld for all Protoss.
'''TL;DR''': Each product has an emphasis on quality and world-building (usually), responsible for both awesome and terrible things. If you really want to know what's what, go look it up yourself from a better source than 1d4chan.


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'''TL;DR''': A game company with an emphasis on quality (usually), responsible for  both awesome and terrible things. If you really want to know what's what, go look it up yourself from a better source than 1d4chan.

Latest revision as of 09:20, 20 June 2023

This is a /v/ related article, which we tolerate because it's relevant and/or popular on /tg/... or we just can't be bothered to delete it.
This article is about something that is considered by the overpowering majority of /tg/ to be fail.
Expect huge amounts of derp and rage, punctuated by /tg/ extracting humor from it.

"Imitation is the sincerest of flattery."

– Charles C. Colton, Lacon: Or, Many Things in a Few Words: Addressed to Those Who Think

"Who controls the past controls the future: who controls the present controls the past."

– Winston Smith, Nineteen Eighty-Four
Blizzard
The words "Blizzard Entertainment", or a 90's female anti-hero with a necklace (formerly collar) holding two watermelons (formerly emphasizing her cleavage)
Alignment Stupid Chaotic Evil
Divine Rank AAA
Pantheon Activision
Domains Greed, Falls From Grace, Bad Ideas, Terrible Writing (Formerly: Polish, Execution, Unoriginality)
Home Plane California, The Cosby Suite
Worshippers Gamers, Whales, Nostalgic nerds, streamers
Favoured Weapon Exploit worker, Union Breaker, Retcons, Virtue Signal, Weinsteinian culture, IP theft, Removal of Creativity

A Blizzard is a unique weather phenomenon that in this form only occurs on the eastern seaboard of North America that, usually between November and February, causes polar winds to stream far more south than usual and massive snowfall and freezing temperatures far below what is normal for these areas, due to the lack of mountain ranges that run from west to east that could block these winds, like in Europe.

Blizzard Entertainment, Inc. on the other hand is an American-owned servant of the PRC and video game developer founded in 1991. Consumed by corporate merger shenanigans in 2008, they are now a subsidiary of parent company Activision Blizzard. They are well known in the gaming community for rising to prominence by shamelessly ripping off a long list of things, the most pertinent to /tg/ being the similarity between its flagship franchises and Warhammer 40k. Blizzard is akin to Apple Inc.: they never really did anything original, and instead took inspiration/borrowed/stole content from other sources, marketing it as though they're pretty much posterboys of the brand, and took the credit for being "pioneers of said genre". Let it not be said they didn't steal their business/creative practices from the best.

While not as skubtastic as the other things present, it still does cause tensions in /tg/ when brought up. Especially if it concerns one of their games' fluff.

While Blizzard does "borrow" other people's ideas, there's no denying marketing spends a lot of time and effort studying those ideas, figuring why they are successful, and what parts of these ideas should be improved or removed to make them better. This leads to creating a few extremely well done and successful games, in turn earning a LOT of money. While other studios may create revolutionary content, Blizzard is more about evolution, with their games becoming golden standards of quality, and "easy to learn, hard to master" learning curves. They are also responsible for creating the game-dev meme "when it's done," which means they could literally spend a decade on mismanagement one game, probably spending too much time doing drugs in the office or seeking the hottest female inductee they can find to grope, and another decade to force the dev team into crunch with a shit-ton of balance patches, while management pisses off to GDC but it's to be expected, given all other major game developers are the same.

There's contention between the legions of GW and the hordes of Blizzard in regards to copyrights, who invented which idea first, and whether any ripping-off in fact occurred. Facts seem to lean in the direction of yes, actually. Blizzard's co founder Allen Adham wanted to get the license to the Warhammer Universe however the business side of the deal fell through, and the team wasn't keen on working for someone else. The exaggerated features and painted art style of the table top minis was adapted for low poly games. It boggles the mind that there still hasn't been legal trouble for this, and leads many to speculate that there's an off the books deal. Fa/tg/uys tend to accuse Blizzard of ripping off most of Games Workshop's content, and they're right. They often write long angry posts about why Blizzard an evil company (which aged far too well, see under "Scandals" below), what was stolen from their precious settings, and why Blizzard games sucks so much. But this is normal operating procedure for khornporation, Ip for the Ip throne after all. This sounds hilarious when you think about Games Workshop, who does steal all of its content from other settings. Blizzard only concentrates what's awesome about Games Workshop and repackages it after doing minimal rework.

TL;DR: Good crunch, meh fluff (their memorable humor is arguably the best part of it), they are the Tzeentch/Slaanesh to GW's Nurgle/Khorne.

Scandals[edit]

From the late 2010's onwards, the company has experienced a steadily worsening fall from grace. In its first decade Blizzard was usually the universally beloved grand-daddy of the gaming world, albeit with one skubby exception in the form of Diablo 3 (Its PC version infamously requires an internet connection to play. It doesn't matter how you or your company tries to sell it, an online-only singleplayer game is never a good idea, despite D3 being one of the VERY few cases of this succeeding. They also had an auction house that just led to all kinds of fucky shit like scams, droprates rarer than winning a lotto and people just going P2W to get the best stuff. Fortunately, they wised up and removed the hell out of it less than 2 years later.). But a number of PR-fuckups, shallow cashgrabs, grievances from the developers that actually make the games and - worst of all - the revelation of years of pervasive sexual harassment of staff by higher-ups have left a very sour taste in many people's mouths and all but crushed Blizzard's reputation.

In a funny twist of fate, when it comes to their products, Blizzard is currently making a lot of the mistakes Geedubs made before Kevin Rountree took over. Another notable development is that a lot of the original developers that made games like Starcraft and Warcraft into the nearly universally beloved gems everyone knows have started building their own games studios to compete with Blizzard.

Here are some of the biggest failures and crimes;

November 3, 2018: The main-event announcement at BlizzCon 2018 was revealed to be Diablo Immortal, a mobile game, and not the hoped-for Diablo IV. Attendees were livid, and one guy who asked if it was an out-of-season April Fools' joke got more applause than the announcement trailer did. The presenters, displaying an astounding inability to read the room, asked the audibly disappointed crowd "Do you guys not have phones?" The gamer rage made an notable impact on Blizzard's stock price, which took months to recover afterwards.

Feburary 12, 2019: Blizzard fired 800 employees despite reporting record earnings.

October 6, 2019: During a tournament, Chinese Hearthstone pro-player Blitzchung appeared wearing a gas mask and goggles in a livestream and showed support for the then-recent Hong Kong protests. Near the end of the livestream he said “Liberate Hong Kong. Revolution of our age”, a recognized slogan in the Hong Kong protest. After the interview Blizzard disqualified Blitzchung, stripped him of his prize money, and banned him for a year. Backlash was immediate and intense, with many users deleting their WoW and Battle.net accounts or destroying their physical games while #BoycottBlizzard trended with thousands of retweets.

October 28, 2019: Blizzard announced a $660,000 prize pool for their annual arena/mythic dungeon world tournaments, after previously releasing a set of promotional in-game toys, promising 1/4 of the sales would go towards said prize pool. Most fans believed the money made from the sales would be added to the $500,000 minimum that Blizzard had promised. However, after competing players confronted Blizzard officials, it was revealed that Blizzard had instead chosen to rely entirely on the sales profit for the prize pool, making off with ~$2 million themselves from the other 3/4 of the sales and contributing nothing out of their own pockets. Yet more nerd rage ensued.

January 28th, 2020: Blizzard released the remastered version of Warcraft 3. The game came out in a notoriously unfinished, buggy and featureless state and used advertisements that bordered on being fraudulent (Australian and EU authorities actually filed a lawsuit against Blizzard for misleading advertisements), was missing features the original game had 13 years ago, claimed ownership of any custom content created for the game in the ToS in a really, really stupid move that is also illegal under US and EU law - especially since Blizzard is a US company (It's believed they're still butthurt that DOTA (Defense of the Ancients, originally a custom map for W3) joined up with Valve and they couln't obtain a single penny from the sequel) and even refused to offer refunds, which prompted another lawsuit by EU authorities against them. The game also completely replaced the original Warcraft 3 on the launcher, locking players out of the original unless they have the physical discs plus disc ports and instead prompting them to download the "improved" version. Effectively, they somehow managed to ruin what is considered to be one of the best RTS games ever made, 18 years after it came out.

August 4, 2020: Employees shared a spreadsheet of salaries and recent pay increases showing that few of them were given raises after crunch, and overtime. Many employees, despite working at one of the biggest video game companies in America, were struggling to pay rent and using the company's free coffee as an appetite suppressant as they cut meals. Apparently that 5-year service sword does not also pay rent.

October 16th, 2020: Blizzard announced that they would put Starcraft 2 into maintenance mode, ceasing any content updates in the future. This has left a lot of players angry and sad, especially since Starcraft 2 is one of the very last remaining RTSes with a decently sized playerbase and competitive scene.

November 20th, 2021: Blizzard releases two transmog sets for World of Warcraft: Shadowlands with the Celestial Observer's Ensemble and the Baby Murloc Satch-Shells. While both were praised for their design, this release caused rancor among the community for being hidden behind a paywall. The former has also been considered better made, or at least more detailed, than the raid tier sets in Patch 9.2, causing further complaints.

June 2, 2022: The release of Diablo Immortal is met with overwhelming outcry, as it proves to be a thinly-veiled pay to win game. The micropayment system for loot boxes is not very evident or necessary in the early stages but, as the end of the game approaches, paying becomes a requirement... almost essential to keep moving forward.

October 3rd, 2022: Servers of Overwatch are shut down to push all players towards playing the sequel releasing the next day.

May 16th, 2023: Overwatch 2 has its single-player PvE mode cancelled, the one thing that was established as the central feature of the up to this point tepidly received sequel to the team shooter. Fan reception has been overwhelmingly negative as not only was the original Overwatch allegedly killed for this single-player mode, the sequel is now just a barely disguised shopfront for exceedingly expensive skins for the hero characters and nothing else.

June 13th, 2023: Turns out, they did some work on Overwatch 2's PvE mode. But here's the catch; they only made the first few missions, or "levels". So, to access them, you gotta pay an extra $15. Even at the face of backlash, Activision just can't stop being the shittiest company on earth it seems.

The sexual harassment lawsuits[edit]

This refers to a series of 2021 sex crime lawsuits against Activision Blizzard regarding offences that go back several years. Due to the severity of the crimes/charges and their effects along with the related investigation being ongoing, they've been given their own section on this page.

July 22nd, 2021: California's Department of Fair Employment filed a civil lawsuit against Activision Blizzard for sexual harassment of numerous employees - especially female employees, some of the incidents going back years. The final catalyst was the suicide of female employee, Kerri Moynihan, identified as one of the victims of said harassment and even speculation that the harassment contributed to her fatal decision. According to the lawsuit, the culprits are from several levels in the company (former Senior Creative Director Alex Afrasiabi and former CTO Ben Kilgore are among them). The charges include unwanted groping, posting intimate pictures without the subject's consent, hidden cameras in toilets and more. Worse, other execs knew of the abuses but did nothing. The situation wasn't helped when several Blizzard employees lashed out at several high-profile WoW commentators and streamers such as Asmongold for criticizing these atrocities, trying to shift blame onto them despite those streamers having nothing to do with the company or the abuse. With morale at an all-time low and widespread stress, the development of new projects was put on a roughly-two-month hiatus.

July 28th, 2021: After delivering an open letter to upper management, a portion of Blizzard staff staged a walkout protest that gained considerable news coverage. There was increasing support for staff to unionize, with Blizzard's Board of Directors responding by consulting the same legal firm whose lawyers prevented Amazon's staff from unionizing.

August 3rd, 2021 Sponsors started to turn against Blizzard and executive-level employees, such as J. Allen Brack and Jesse Meschuk, left the company (unclear whether it was voluntary resignations or the standard sugar-coated "golden parachute" dismissals for top level business execs). Brack and Meschuk are both among those named in the lawsuit, and Brack was succeeded by "co-leaders" Jen Oneal and Mike Ybarra following his departure (with further accusations leveled that Brack left to deliberately avoid being confronted over knowing about the abuses but not stopping them).

August 25th, 2021 The California Department of Fair Employment leveled charges of obstruction via witness tampering - requiring employees to speak with Activision Blizzard execs ahead of contacting the DFEH, amending the complaint and even destroying evidence by shredding records from the HR archives. This was added to the lawsuit and could take the case from a civil lawsuit to a criminal lawsuit.

August 26th-27th, 2021: Characters and places named after developers from the lawsuit are renamed or removed from Overwatch and World of Warcraft. Examples include the Overwatch character Jesse McCree and World of Warcraft's Draenei city Mac'aree - both named for former WoW lead level designer Jesse McCree, being renamed to Cole Cassidy (in a clever move, "Jesse McCree" was retconned to be Cole's criminal alias) and Ere'dath respectively.

September 14th, 2021: A lawsuit is filed against Activision Blizzard accusing them of union-busting and worker intimidation. The latter in particular based on the company executives' response to the sexual harassment lawsuit.

September 20th, 2021: Activision Blizzard is subjected to a federal investigation as the Securities and Exchange Commission gets involved over how the company has handled employee allegations of workplace discrimination, sexual harassment, and sexual misconduct. Bobby Kotick and several other senior executives were given subpoenas, with the court date pending.

Franchises relevant to /tg/[edit]

  • WarCraft: A real-time strategy (RTS) series; initially Orcs vs Humans but then later games added more races. Then it became a MMORPG with all kinds of crazy shit. Particularly notable to /tg/ because it spilled over into multiple genres: There were two separate editions of a D&D campaign setting, a physical trading card game and has its own board games too.
  • StarCraft: RTS IN SPHESSSSS! Space Marines Terrans vs Zerg vs Protoss. Beyond being the (former) national sport of Korea, the StarCraft franchise has its own board game and has its own unique version of Risk which alters the rules just enough so that it isn't merely a re-skinned version of Risk.
  • Diablo: Grimdark Dark Fantasy setting involving the wars between Angels and Demons, and also not actually made by Blizzard. It was made instead by an outfit named Condor, which got bought out by Davidson & Associates, which also bought out a little outfit named Chaos Studios. Then, Chaos Studios got renamed Blizzard, and Condor was renamed Blizzard North, which is why Diablo ended up being playable on battle.net. Meanwhile, another group of guys named Synergistic Software got bought out by Sierra On-Line, which was in turn acquired by CUC International, which gobbled up Davidson & Associates, which was how the job of making Diablo's expansion pack, Hellfire, got farmed out to Synergistic. However, Condor and Blizzard both had veto power over Synergistic's ideas, and Condor, which was already working on Diablo II, didn't want anything to be in Hellfire that was also going to be in D2, which is why the Barbarian and secret cow quest had to be cut and why Hellfire couldn't be played over Battle.net even though the code totally worked. There was a short-lived attempt to port the Diablo franchise into both 2nd Edition and 3rd Edition Dungeons and Dragons, though the results were not particularly successful or well-remembered.
  • Hearthstone: A digital collectible card game. Think MtG but all the depth and complexity got replaced with RNG bullshit. Also it only costs you one kidney to gather a good card collection rather than both, one leg, one testicle, and the soul of your firstborn child , but Blizzard seems dedicated to catch back on that missed profit by adding more content that cannot be bought with in-game currency (gold) and going the way of the battlepass...wait, what do you mean they have two passes?

Blizzard things that aren't (/tg/ related) rip-offs[edit]

In 1992, they made Battle Chess for the Commodore 64 & MS-DOS, and also a Lord of the Rings RPG for the Amiga. The LotR game was supposed to be just the first book, with two sequels, but they never got around to finishing it. They made RPM Racing (allegedly the first American-made SNES game) and Rock n' Roll Racing for the Super Nintendo and the Sega Megadrive but that's /v/ shit. They also made a side-scrolling Superman beat 'em up and a shitty Justice League fighting game for a dose of /co/ crap too. There's also their game The Lost Vikings, a platforming puzzle game where you control three vikings, each of them with their own special abilities (Erik the Swift can run faster and jump higher than the other two and also bash through walls with his horned helmet, Baleog the Fierce can shoot an arrow and kill enemies with his sword and Olaf the Stout can block with shield which he can also use like a hang-glider.) Since the game has vikings in it, /tg/ might be interested in it due to their viking fetish. A sequel was also made, The Lost Vikings 2, which added two more characters, a werewolf named Fang and Scorch the dragon, but it's kind of a rarity. Fast forward to more recent times, trying to cash in on the growing MOBA-craze, Blizzard developed Heroes of the Storm by throwing all their decent franchises into a blender to make one mediocre new game, which is ironic considering highly customized user-made StarCraft and WarCraft III maps pretty much spawned the MOBA genre in the first place, even more ironic is that this attempt pretty much collapsed in a matter of years while those original MOBAs are still active over a decade later. Blizz's most recent success is the first-person shooter Overwatch. Though hilariously similar to Team Fortress 2 and drawing upon various sci-fi and fantasy sources, it presents a somewhat unique (albeit poorly fleshed-out) noblebright setting and characters that are mostly fapbait/schlickbait. While weighed down by the growing controversy of lootboxes (which, to their credit, was never necessary to get anything critical in the game, just cosmetics), it managed to see some measure of success for a few years. Overwatch's sequel - or update, to be more precise - failed to live up to any of that hype between an invasive battle pass and a failure to address any of the growing flaws in the gameplay. In fact, it made its own issues including - and we shit you not - reducing the entire playable roster to a number of racial and cultural diversity quotas to fulfill rather than improving the game experience.

Micro$oft buyout - a new hope(?)[edit]

<It was a cold January morning in the year 22.M3 when the gaming community was awoken to the news most unusual and surprising. As it turned out - big daddy Microsoft (or more specifically it's CEO Phil Spencer) decided that Blizzard's portfolio of IPs looked mighty fine and that they should take it, and so they did for about 68 billion dollars. To put that into reference, this cost close to ten times as much as their acquisition of Zenimax (Owners of Bethesda alongside a few other major studios) last year. The news media went crazy about this and the rumour mill began to churn almost immediately at this shakeup. While the transfer of assets and ownership is still not done as of the time of this writing (23.01.2022) and will be finished at the latest by 20.06.2023. We can try to surmise a few things that are known from the technical side or the interviews with Spencer.

Firstly, it has been made clear and in no uncertain terms that the gaming industry's most despicable scumbag Bobby Cocktick will be getting the boot as soon as the deal finalizes with Spencer taking over - a mighty cry can be heard ringing out across the land~ -khm- so that is an immediate plus since the guy presided over the aforementioned scandals while basically not giving a shit about the victims or the conduct plus, you know, he stole his mother's vintage ashtray and sold it so that tells you all about his character that you need to know (and in his last interview with the workers he basically tried to save his face and protect the corporation instead of manning up and admitting to the wrongdoings, yeah...good riddance asshole). Unfortunately, he'll still get his artificer golden parachute to allow him to live out his life by either starting up his own company built upon skinner boxes or (ideally) living on the fringes of society, feeding upon the tons of money he made off his bullshit.

Secondly, Microsoft could finally put a stop to the batshit bro-culture and sexual harassment that appears to have become a regularity at Blizzard if for no other reason than good optics post-acquisition (it helps that the offenders and their associates have already been purged from the company). But hey, if it solves the issues all the better. Also, if one is to believe an interview with Spencer, many studios that have been sent to slave in the CoD mines may be liberated and allowed to go work on their own games (Singularity, Crash Bandicoot, Spyro) while also making sure that Blizzard's own original stuff like Warcraft, Starcraft and others get proper attention.

However - it must also be noted that 'ol Microsoft also has a raging boner for making money that is somewhat tempered with business pragmatism which did not prevent them to jump onto lootbox bandwagon or engage in microtransactions since the existence of GamePass has made them enough money to alleviate the need. Also worth remembering that while Spencer may love Blizzard's oldie games, not only are all of the staffers who made those classics long gone by now, he is still a CEO of a corporation whose primary goal is to please investors by making that green arrow go up. If a franchise does not seem like it will generate much money it will be thrown back into the dustbin.

All that being said - this may represent the best and last hope Blizzard has to get itself out of the gutter and get halfway decent again. A good indicator of this will be how Bethesda will fare with Starfield and Elder Scrolls VI, but a cautious optimist may surmise that we may get games that will, at worst, be merely fine which after the debacles of the new 20s would alone be a big fucking improvement to boot. It should be noted to that the deal will only be finalized in July 2023, and until then may be blocked by antitrust laws or compromised by other factors...

And sure enough, they got blocked by the UK. Not the EU like we thought, but specifically the United Kingdom. It still rests upon the Cloud Gaming monopoly they claim XBox has, but since it’s a single country all Microsoft has to do is not produce games for the UK anymore and they’ll likely just continue with the merger. So… I guess the merger is still happening?

Whatever it ends up looking like, it couldn’t prepare us for what happened next: Them releasing a quest in World of Warcraft that made you complicit in the abuse and rape of a character, all in the name of keeping the timeline in order. How Microsoft will allow the merger to happen after this, we don’t know yet, but one things clear. They took one good look at the Pinkerton incident at Wizards and said ”Hold my beer.” More as the situation updates, but yeah this looks to be the straw that broke the camel’s back.

An unbiased comparison[edit]

Games Workshop and Blizzard Entertainment, or more specifically Warhammer 40k and World of Warcraft respectively, exhibit similarities and differences that can be factually assessed without any real bias. Click the Expand button to the right to see a comprehensive tiny list of the comparisons between popular topics of much debate.

Note this applies to their settings, as the comparison of companies is moot given Blizzard has sunk from its once-soaring heights to a depth far, far lower than GW ever did. For all of GW's many flaws including money grabbing, bouts of discrimination and litigation (all which Blizzard is also guilty of), at least GW never fomented sexual assault or induced a suicide. And unlike WoW, Warhammer is growing more and more popular and GW revenue is rising. Oh 90's and 2000's Blizzard, we miss you so.

Orks vs. Orcs[edit]

While it is true that the light green skin, angry porcine face with lots of tusks, and heavyset jawlines are traits shared across the two species of Orcoids, that's about where the similarities end. While Orks are brutal, fun-loving homicidal maniacs who love Dakka and only momentarily hesitate to shoot something if it's sufficiently green and orky, orcs in Blizzard's universe actually eventually filled the unique role of being good guys. For the most part, anyway. Back when they were first through the portals they were extremely bloodthirsty but as time has gone on they've settled down nicely. This is actually a first, as few fictional settings are really known for having Orcs who can be described as friendly (Strike Legion and Elder Scrolls being two other notable examples). In fact, the Orcs of Blizzard's universe are the glue of their faction, serving as the lynch-pin by which the other races come together as one Horde.

Similarly, Orkzes iz da biggest an' da strongest.. A lowly Ork boy is far more buff and much heavier than your standard human, and he only gets bigger as he ages. Orcs, while significantly physically imposing, are roughly the same height as average humans, and are dwarfed by their Tauren allies.

In addition, Orcs spawned a total of three BBEGs of the setting, including the first Lich King himself, while most other races, except dragons and (technically) Draenei, have their count on one or zero. The Orks, on the other hand, are the BBEGs.

Terran Marines vs Space Marines[edit]

This should be somewhat obvious. Space Marines, as imagined by GW, are one-man armies, raised from a young age to be killing machines and then augmented to become superhuman monstrosities. Terran Marines, by comparison, are pitiful. If we're being very generous, they're an analogue for the Tempestus corps., but with a worse track record. They are literally a case of the government or rebel faction finding every hick and criminal they can and shoving them in a brainwashing tank, slapping power armor on them, pumping them with drugs, handing them a gun, and telling them to keep shooting until it stops moving. And, considering everything in the StarCraft universe can pierce through tanks and giant mechs, not to mention some power armor, those marines aren't likely to survive their first deployment. So, to put it simply, Terran Marines are really closer to Guardsmen or Penal Legionnaires, except with better equipment and even more drugs. Although like the Guard, they do have really nice tanks and fantastic artillery.

Zerg vs Tyranids[edit]

Both are races of ravenous, rapidly evolving beasts under the control of a distant supreme intelligence, both use biotechnology instead of tools, most of their units are fast, deadly, fragile and numerous, and they even look almost the same. The last part is no accident, since GW all but copy-pasted the Zerg appearance into Tyranids in 3rd edition, mostly to capitalize on StarCraft's financial success (yes, they were that greedy and shameless even back then).

Secondly, while the Tyranid hive mind is their collective consciousness, the Zerg have actual physical entities with emotions and personalities to rule them - from the lowly Overlords, to the Cerebrate, and even to The Queen of Blades after Kerrigan took over control. With that they also get some actual character development and political struggles in their ranks - something 'Nids solely lack as individual organisms are simply tools of the Hive Mind, whose only motivation is to feed. Even though most Cerebrates merged into the new Overmind and were subsequently killed by Kerrigan (and her puppets) during Brood War, the real reason that they never showed up again was that their hierarchy was similar enough to the 'Nids that the Cerebrates were killed off off-screen and cut from StarCraft II as a way of Blizzard playing nice with Games Workshop.

The Zerg also do not consume entire worlds like Tyranids do. They only conquer and colonize them, which automatically lowers their Eldritch Unstoppable Evil level by half.

There's also a variant of Zerg called the Primal Zerg, which have a strictly more reptilian/mammalian aesthetic and are notably individuals that operate in Packs. Despite being individuals, some with marked intelligence, they're all basically just focused on eating strong prey and surviving and have no ambitions or desires beyond that one dimension.

Burning Legion vs Daemons of Chaos[edit]

Both are evil demons, who came from the dimension of magic and want to destroy everything. The Burning Legion, however, is highly organized and structured. Even after their dark god Sargeras got himself killed, they managed to keep their shit together. Moreover, unlike Chaos Daemons, who are the manifestations of emotions and magic, creatures of the Legion are mostly normal sapient biological beings, transformed through overuse of fel magic, or artificial constructs, enlivened by said fel magic. Unlike Chaos Gods, who want the eternal conflict just for the sake of it (which makes sense, given they are empowered by emotions, and conflicts stimulate more emotions), the Burning Legion have clear goals, which are: 1) Gather all the magic, 2) Use it to destroy the Creation, 3) Hope a new, better one comes along. 4) ???, 5) PROFIT!

Protoss and Draenei vs Eldar[edit]

You fucking kidding me? OK, let's compare them. All three are superpowered races with small numbers, long lifespan, have tech, superior to everything in their setting (save Xel'Naga, Titans and Necrons respectively). And that's it. Protoss are tough as adamantium bunkers, can warp in infantry almost instantly any place with an energy field, are fast as a slime, hit like every fucking one of them is armed with a tank cannon or a Power Fist and tend to move in big unkillable all-destroying deathballs of doom. The Draenei have a natural affinity for magic of any kind, and tend to use it in all their technology, and are less durable than Protoss and slower than Eldar but faster than the former and tougher than the latter. The Eldar are fast as hell, can be killed by a mean look, and tend to zoom around in small groups at mind-blowing speed, surgically shooting/cutting down priority targets before retreating to the safety of cover. Culture-wise Protoss are closer to Tau than to Eldar, with a rigid caste system and hierarchy, and the highly collectivist ideology of the Khala, which is actually almost the same as the Tau's Greater Good. From this perspective Dark Templar are basically the Farsight enclave, who told the Khala and its Ethe... I meant Judicators to fuck off and left to build their new home without that brainwashing pheromones psi-internet bullshit. Oh, wait, the Tau Empire was introduced 3 years after the release of StarCraft... OOPS! Meanwhile the Draenei also have a few cultural parallels to the Tau as well as Jews (given their history of persecution, clear Exodus parallels highly religious culture and seeking a homeland).

All three also fell out of their golden ages pretty hard, though that's about where the similarities end. The Eldar caused their empire's fall entirely on their own, between all the murder-fucking and general debauchery that was getting out of hand, to such a point that not only did it reduce their species' population to a pitiful fraction of what it once was, but also damned each and every Eldar soul that exists (or has yet to exist) by creating one of the four Chaos Gods responsible for a shit ton of the Grimdark in 40k. Even though the Eldar are fighting against all odds, and making some progress with the birth of Ynnead, the chance of them actually ever returning to a semblance of their former glory is about as likely as the God-Emperor of Mankind leaping from the Golden Throne and declaring the Imperium of Man a Xenos-inclusive interfaith democracy. The Protoss are only partially responsible for their fall from power, as the internal strife between the Judicator Caste and Templar Caste didn't exactly help prepare them for when the Zerg invaded their homeworld of Aiur. The surviving Protoss as a whole had to evacuate to Shakuras, where their Dark Templar kin granted them sanctuary (in that kind of arrogant "look at how cool and caring we are despite you exiling our kind" mindset). Also unlike the Eldar, the Protoss are notably reclaiming their former glory. Having made buddies with the Dark Templar, Purifiers (sentient Protoss AI), Tal'Darim (to the Protoss the way Dark Eldar are to the Craftworlders), the collective Protoss race took back Aiur and is currently rebuilding a unified homeworld for all Protoss. The Draenei are somewhere between the two, as their fall was due to some of their race the Titan Sargeras' offer while those who refused him became the Draenei and fled with the help of the Naaru. Some of these Draenei went on the offensive against the Legion while others fled elsewhere to start a new life. It also took ages, but now all Draenei are finally on the offensive against the Legion. Given the demons' devastation of their homeworld Argus, it's unlikely they can reclaim it, but they're determined to make a fresh start.

TL;DR: Each product has an emphasis on quality and world-building (usually), responsible for both awesome and terrible things. If you really want to know what's what, go look it up yourself from a better source than 1d4chan.