Elf: Difference between revisions

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35 elf bone bolts can be made from one elf.
35 elf bone bolts can be made from one elf.


[[Category: Dungeons and Dragons]][[Category:Elves]]
[[Category: Dungeons and Dragons Races]][[Category:Elves]]

Revision as of 16:24, 28 June 2008

Elves are forest-dwelling sisses; the antithesis to the manly dwarf race. Elves are the chosen race of many Mary Sues in the fantasy setting thanks to their pointed ears, slender builds and and ever-perky breasts. Though related, they are not in fact eldar due primarily that one is found in space with guns that shoot shurikens and the other live in forests and have bows that loose arrows. Unless you're playing something crazy like Spelljammer.

Even this masculine elf is actually female.

Or that could be why they're always scantily-clad and the fantasy of neckbeards everywhere.

Typical Elven Traits and Habits

Some people take this shit too far.
DM of the Rings webcomic
  • Having long/pointed ears
  • Hugging trees
  • Eating granola
  • Kissing bunnies
  • Prancing in meadows
  • Being sissies or girls

All elves are female until proven otherwise.

In much the same way that a single dwarf can kill ten orcs, ten orcs can easily rape an elf. Though it doesn't count, cause they're elves.

Uses of elves

35 elf bone bolts can be made from one elf.