Malcador the Sigillite

The Administratum of the 41st millennium wishes it could be half as badass as Malcador. Interesting armrests...

Malcador the Sigillite (Also known as Malcador the Hero, MTS o.g.-bestie homedawg o' Big E or Malcador the Laundryman Of Teh Emprah) was Regent of Terra, Master of the Administratum, Grand Master of the Officio Assassinorum, and all around bestest bud of the Emperor of Mankind during the Great Crusade and the Horus Heresy. The real-life equivalent of Malcador's position in the Imperium was that of the Prime Minister/Chancellor, who acted as de facto Head of Government in the name of the sovereign (the Emperor).

In some respects Malcador represents something of the Emprah's final dream for mankind as well as something of the nightmare that the Imperium became. In every sense he is just a man. Not a super soldier, just a clever old bugger. Like Big E he understood that the Imperium needed taxes and administration as well as generals and he entrusted those duties to other normal humans. Without him most of the things he created were horribly corrupted because humans are kinda jerks but even then at least it was humans being dicks to each other not demigods lording it over the rest.

History

Having served the Emprah during the unification of Terra (meaning he was fucking OLD for a human), he was present during the creation of the Primarchs and advised the Emperor during the early crusade. Interestingly, the very first Space Marines (as in pre-legion Dark Angels) were noted to have fought with the the Emperor against a psychic group called the Sigilites (even being mentally shielded against psychic assault by the Emperor himself for the campaign; warriors from said campaign had a base d+10 on psychic defense rolls), implying that Malcador may have been one of their number. When the Primarchs started getting collected and the new Imperium spreading outwards, Malcador remained as Regent of Terra, acting as a prime minister who kept the day-to-day activities of Imperium of Man running, sponsoring various agencies (like the Remembrancer Order), appointing the Council of Terra and building the Administratum from the ground up.

After the Emperor returned to Terra and set up the Council of Terra, the Emperor appointed Malcador to the position of First Lord of the Council (essentially the Prime Minister of the Imperium at that point, where the Warmaster was the military commander) while the Emperor descended into the Imperial palace and set to work on gaining access to the Webway. Though he tried to be some kind of cool uncle/granddad to the Primarchs, most of them seem to have got jealous of his closeness to the Emperor. All of them showed off their physical oomph in front of him (though at the time Mortarion was the most recent Primarch to be discovered, so we don't know if Jaghatai, Alpharius and the rest decided to lay the smackdown on grandpa), and at least two of them straight-up assaulted him.

When the Horus Heresy broke out, Malcador worked closely with Rogal Dorn in preparing the defenses of Terra and coordinating the logistics of the war-effort, as well as overseeing a formation of special projects such as the Adeptus Astronomican (who were required to replace the Emperor in powering the psychic beacon), the Officio Assassinorum and towards the end of the Horus Heresy; the formation of the Grey Knights.

He is dead. Very, very dead. During the Siege of Terra, the only chance that the Emperor could get to join the battle would be if someone took his place sitting in the Golden Throne (since Magnus broke it and threatened Terra with a new Eye of Terror) Malcador's psychic power meant he was the only potential candidate to take the Golden Throne while the Emperor fought off the Chaos Space Marines. However, since he wasn't a psyker of equivalent level to the Emperor, the process wore him out and he crumbled to dust after the Emperor was returned to the seat by Rogal Dorn and Jaghatai Khan. With his last ounce of strength, he allowed the Emperor to communicate with his mortal servants one last time. Truly, an all around awesome bureaucrat.

Malcador's Insights

There was much more to Malcador than meets the eye. He claims that he is part of a very old order that has guided humanity from the very beginning, and that the =][= symbol often associated with the later Inquisition was actually the symbol of his order, therefore he was probably one of the old-school Illuminati.

He also does not see eye-to-eye with the Emperor either, disagreeing on some very fundamental points:

• Malcador worried about the Emperor being so far above humanity, so inspirational in his efforts to squeeze out superstition and false-religion that it would eventually cause religious cults to form around himself and his sons instead, which is exactly what happened.
• He also warned that humanity would be so invested in the Emperor that if he were to ever leave or die, humanity would not be able to handle the shock and would be left paralysed and without direction. Though the Emperor himself dismissed this as nonsense, since his intention was to raise humanity and allow it to think for itself - Yet another miscalculation on his part.
  • When looked at from a different point of view: the Emperor's plan to invade and conquer the Webway (which Magnus was supposed to assist with if he had not broken it), then lead humanity into enlightenment away from the dangers of unrestrained psychic potential (which Mortarion was supposed to be the poster boy for if he hadn't switched sides) was so utterly dependent on the Emperor being the center of it all that he was was practically setting himself up for failure. While the Emperor was betting the future of the species on his own outcome, Malcador was thankfully setting up contingencies just in case everything went tits up.

Therefore it could be said that all of Malcador's efforts to create the agencies that the Imperium would need later were all part of an insurance policy that humanity could deploy if it ever turned out that the Emperor and his Primarchs could not be relied upon to carry humanity on their shoulders. Needless to say, if Malcador was the Emperor, things probably would have turned out better for the Imperium.

One of his more amusing requests was that the Primarchs be made female instead of male, or at the very least, add female primarchs into the mix. His primary reasoning was that it would largely deter conflicts within his children, as boys tended to have a competitive "dick-measuring attitude" towards each other, preventing them all from cohesively working with each other. Girls are generally more level-headed than boys and act more as the voice of reason in a family (this is highly debatable), which would probably have eased some of the tensions that led to the primarchs despising each other. The Emperor eventually dismissed this, both as a joke and that it simply couldn't be done as the Space Marine gene seed was keyed towards male subjects. Additionally, it might be that the Emperor expected his sons to be of one mind as he planned to train them under his unified guidance, ensuring they would work utterly objectively with no personal feelings to get in the way (Much like him). This expectation went to shit when the Chaos Gods spirited the Primarchs away from Terra and they landed on different planets and being raised with different backgrounds and beliefs, causing friction between those whose home culture did not really mesh with each other. This undiffused brotherly rivalry (Not helped because the Emperor did not bother to ease the tensions between his sons, in fact if any he intensified them by being a total dick.) *BLAM!* HERESY! would eventually royally bite him back in his golden buttplate when the Horus Heresy erupted. It also caused Malcador quite a lot of physical pain - all the primarchs made a show of their physical strength in front of him at some point, with Mortarion choking him and Lorgar backhanding him around like a ragdoll.

Credits

He was the third most powerful human psyker of his time (after Big E and Magnus the Red), being able to do things such as plunging the entire moon of Titan in the Warp to protect what would become the Grey Knights from the attacking Traitor Legions. He was also able to prevent a volkite gun from firing even while surrounded by a squad of Sisters of Silence, who were there to keep the psyker Sevarian's powers in check, without showing any sort of discomfort or loss of concentration.

Though it has never been seen, he must have been one badass warrior too, since he was the Grand Master of the Assassins. Says something that he took a bone-crunching backhand from Lorgar on the chin. This, in addition to his above-mentioned prodigious psychic power, shows what sort of man Malcador was. With his power - and considering only a few Primarchs are psychic or have psychic defenses (actually they all had psychic potential but most didn't realise, or at least understand their full potential) - he probably could've put Lorgar on a time out. On the moon. With his mind. Or maybe not, considering Lorgy was the second most powerful psyker among the Primarchs, straight after the Magnus himself. Then again Lorgar's powers hadn't come into their own yet, so Malcador could've put him down for the count quite easily back then.

He proposed the Chaplain edict, ironically taking the idea from Lorgar and Sanguinius though back then they were more like Commissars, keeping order and looking for heresy, instead of the modern day warrior-priests.

There is also a tank named after him, though nowadays another tank named after an important hero and leader of the Imperium is used instead, the Leman Russ, passing over yet another perfectly servicable vehicle. Russ is a glory hogger like that.

He was also potentially the busiest man in existence, having founded pretty much the ENTIRE Imperium single-handedly. The organizations he founded--the Administratum, the Officio Assassinorum, Adeptus Astronomica and the Inquisition--have been fucking up everything else and each other ever since without his guidance.

His force staff has also passed into the hands of Varro Tigurius, because Ultramarines.