Neutronium golem

Oh God

A Neutronium golem is the monster that /tg/ whips out when two people are comparing dick sizes with prestige classes and obscure splatbooks, like Pun-Pun, and someone wants to say "oh yeah? well infinity plus one!". Neutronium golems will fuck your shit up, mostly because they will fuck up the solar system just by BEING THERE.

These bastards will divide by zero AS AN ATTACK OF OPPORTUNITY.

Stat Block for D&D 3e

Golem, Neutronium (Large Construct)
Hit Dice:	250d1000+1,966,080 (2,216,080 hp)
Initiative:	+79
Speed:	Fly 5,901,426,338' (perfect)
Armor Class:	932 (-1 size, -1 Dex, +80 gravitic mastery, +844 natural), touch 88, flat-footed 932
Base To-Hit:	+187 (+437 grapple)
Attack:	Slam +512 (40960d10+246 damage; average 225,526)
Full Attack:	2 slams, as above
Special Attacks:	Gravitic aura, heat aura, pulsed x-ray, starquake
Special Qualities:	Accretion, construct, damage reduction 1500/-, darkvision 60ft, fast healing 1500, gravitic mastery, immunity to magic, low-light vision, magnetar, superluminal, unearthly construction
Saves:	Fort +163, Ref +162, Will +163
Abilities:	S:502, D:9, Cn:-, I:-, W:11, Ch:1
Environment:	Outer space
Organization:	Solitary, patrol (2-4), or with time lord (Divine Rank 192, 960HD)
Challenge Rating:	9721
Treasure:	None
Alignment:	always Neutral
Advancement:	251-353HD (Large), 354-707HD (Huge)
Level Adjustment:	+17,427 (assuming sentience)
A ball of blistering heat surrounding this automaton is palpable. At its centre you can discern a dark grey humanoid shape, only slightly taller than a human, but proportionally built like a stocky dwarf. The surface of the figure is featureless, and seems to bubble and ripple as if constantly boiling.