Pathetic Marines

Pathetic Marines
Battle Cry	"None more pathetic!" and "Your best is still our worst!"
Founding	M31 during the Horus Heresy
Successors of	Multiple Loyalist Chapters
Successor Chapters	Hopefully none.
Chapter Master	Heavy Bolter Guy, Atticuss Sackituss
Homeworld	"The Bastion of Weakness" Space Hulk
Strength	Around 1000 Marines
Specialty	Jack of All Trades,Being Pathetic
Allegiance	Imperium
Colours	None

MY SONS AND WARRIORS, I CALL NOW TO THE LOWEST AND WEAKEST AMONG YOU, THAT YOU MIGHT KNOW THE TASK SET BEFORE YOU. YOU ARE THE WEAKEST AND TRULY THE MOST PATHETIC OF ALL WHO BEAR THE GENE-SEED OF YOUR FATHERS, THE ONES WOULD DIE WITHOUT GLORY OR NAMES. WERE IT NOT THAT I HAD NEED OF EACH AND EVERY ONE OF YOUR PATHETIC SOULS, YOU WOULD HAVE ALL OF YOU DIED ALONE AND UNREMEMBERED. BUT THAT FATE IS ONE YOU WILL NO LONGER FULFILL. YOU WILL ALL RETREAT TO YOUR CHAPTER ARMORY AND TAKE UP THE FIRST PIECE OF WARGEAR THAT FALLS BEFORE YOUR GAZE. BE IT A WEAPON OF TRUE GLORY OR A SIMPLE BOX OF AMMUNITION, BE IT PERFECTION WROUGHT BY HUMAN HANDS OR AN ABOMINATION OF XENOS DESIGN. YOU WILL TAKE WHAT YOU FIND ,AND ONE SHIP OF YOUR CHOOSING, AND MEET WITH YOUR NEWFOUND BROTHERS AT THE EYE OF TERROR. NOW GO MY SONS, MY ONES MOST PATHETIC, AND LET YOUR ENEMIES KNOW THAT EVEN WARRIORS AS PATHETIC AS YOU WILL KNOW NO FEAR.- The God Emperor of Mankind upon creating the Chapter.

"GO FUCK YOURSELF YOU CRAZY INNOCENT BURNING WITCH!"- Last conversation between Chapter Master Atticuss Sackituss and Lord High Inquisitor Marietta Von Brundervane of the Ordo Hereticus, just before initiating a Warp Jump.

The Pathetic Marines are a chapter of Space Marines born from one of the multiple threads that populate /tg/, on 4chan. The chapter is composed of the most pathetic marines from each of the Loyalist Chapters of the Horus Heresy,assembled together to be sent on a crusade against the Arch-Traitor himself. Their failure was obvious. They did not only fail to kill Horus, but even failed to reach him in the first place, crushing together every ship in their fleet as soon as they exited the Warp, creating so also the poor excuse they call their Fortress Monastery. For some years after the merging of their fleet, all the marines wandered trough the huge structure, mapping it and finding that every ship had no real Warp induced change. A lot of time was spent then trying to establish a chain of command. After what seemed a few years in the Pathetic Marines' point of view their Fortress emerged from the Eye of Terror, revealing that actually they have been considered dead for ten thousand years.

Overview

While they see themselves as awfully pathetic, the Pathetic Marines can be considered very well equipped by the 41st Millennium's standards. Every marine has his gene seed coming directly from their own Primarch, have participated in the Great Crusade and is equipped with weaponry that today is considered to be an awesome and awe-inspiring relic. The chapter's modus operandi is not defined at all, as it's an ever-changing mixture of the various combat doctrines that each marine learnt in his original chapter. While all this diversity may be challenging for the commanders to deal with, it works surprisingly well, often pulling out of each marine the best aspects of his combat doctrine and creating a mixture of tactics and strategies so complex and idiotically convoluted that even Tzeentch couldn't foresee it. Still, compared to the combat effectiveness of other chapters, they are very weak and lack the aura of strength that every Astartes worth of his name should show. Their battle cries reflect this dual reality perfectly. The two chapter's cries are usually used in tandem, as the first 'None more pathetic!' is shouted to notify to both friends and foes that the Pathetic Marines are far from being the Emperor's finest, but 'Your best is still our worst!' serves to remind the enemies of the Imperium that despite being Space Marines full of flaws, they are Space Marines nonetheless, and will still fight to the death (or almost) in every and any battlefield.

Relations

No wonder they are friendly with radical inquisitors.

The relations that the Pathetic Marines have with the Imperium are ones of love-hate.

In the Inquisition' archives there are multiple recorded arguments between Chapter Master Atticuss and many puritan inquisitors, while many a radical inquisitor are considered friends of the chapter.

"Very often happens that a puritan inquisitor decides that he has to hunt and kill a certain radical inquisitor. Not very often happens that someone puts themselves between two such opponents. Even less often those someone are Space Marines. I must thank those Pathetic Marines for still being alive today. They had awesome xeno tech, and were in fact looking for me to help them activate an Eldar Webway Portal. When I found that they had multiple artefacts of such caliber I asked for a couple, in exchange they asked my Jokearo. I gladly gave him to them, indeed, but now I'm wondering for what purpouse!"

-Radical Inquisitor Emil Von Ansager, when conversing with one of his accolytes.

The Adeptus Mechanicus is like an exasperation of the relation they have with the Inquisition. Multiple times squads of Skitarii have been sent to destroy what is considered tech-heresy and kill every marine involved with such objects, while many other times they have come crawling on their knees , praying to be permitted to enter some areas of the Bastion of Weakness, where multiple STCs were thought to be.

The relations with the Ecclesiarchy are complex too, as the priests try to push onto the marines beliefes about the Emperor that are not their own, as the see him as their All-loving, Ever-living, Always-protecting father. While they argue with the priests, they end up sometimes even fighting uber-fanatical Sororitas teams. It doesn't end well for the Sisters usually, the former Space Wolves among the Pathetic Marines are incurable womanizers.

The Imperial Navy is aroused but not amused by the Pathetic Marines, as they think of the Bastion of Weakness as a horrendously idiotic thing, and appear disgusted at the mere thought that someone may call it a "starship".

Usually the Imperial Guard regiments and PDFs that have the Pathetic Marines as allies are delighted by their presence. It may be for the fact that many borderline-heretic shenanignas are pulled off by many of the marines.

Additionally, many of the Pathetic Marines hold major dislike for their fellow Space Marine Legions, distrusting members of the "Bloody Magpies"-"Maroon Kiwis"-"Red Chickens", or Blood Ravens to the rest of the Galaxy, on accusations of theft. Due to their general infatuation with modified Xenos technology, the Black Templars refuse any and all friendly communication with the Pathetic Marines, believing them to be little better- if not worse- than the heretics the Templars seek to purge. Ultramarines also share a less than ideal relationship with the Pathetic Marines, spontaneously bursting into tears and saying quote "The Codex Astartes does not support this." On a more friendly note, the Salamanders applaude the welcoming nature of the Pathetic Marines, though this is likely just the inability of the Watch to secure a perimeter around any camp they make. Space Wolves too enjoy the company of Pathetic Marines, claiming they "act stupider than a Wulfen drunk on Fenrisian Ale.