Grimdark Songwriting

Observing some striking correlations between the songs found in children's movies and the 40K universe, people on /tg/ sometimes adapt these songs to bring out their true grimdark potential.

Disney Adaptations

The most popular segment to be subjected to grimdarkification, Disney songs seem to lend themselves well to the total despair of the 41st millennium.

Pocahontas: Savages

-Part 1-
[Inquisitor Ratcliffe]
What can you expect
From filthy little xenos?
Their whole disgusting race is like a curse
For them no tears we shed
They're only good when dead
They're vermin, as I said
And worse

[Grey Knights]
They're aliens! Aliens!

[Inquisitor Ratcliffe]
They're not even human

[Grey Knights]
Aliens! Aliens!

[Inquisitor Ratcliffe]
Astartes to the fore!
They're not like you and me
Which means that we must purge them
We must sound the drums of war!

[Inquisitor Ratcliffe+Grey Knights]
They're aliens! Aliens!
Filthy xenos rabble!
Now we sound the drums of war!

[Eldrad]
This is as I saw
With their absurd ambition
The Mon-Keigh seek to conquer and destroy

[Caerys]
Beneath that armour plate
They harbor only hate

[Aspect Warriors]
Killing them shall be a joy

[Aspect Warriors]
They're savages! Savages!
Zeal and fervor blinds them
Savages! Savages!

[Caerys]
Killers at the core

[Exarch]
They're a lesser race than us
Which means they can't be trusted

[Eldrad]
We must sound the drums of war

[Aspect Warriors]
They're savages! Savages!
Now we march against them
And we sound the drums of war

[Grey Knights]
Aliens! Aliens!

[Brother-Captain]
Let's go kill a few, men!

[Aspect Warriors]
Savages! Savages!

[Inquisitor Ratcliffe]
Now it's up to you, men!

[All]
(Aliens) Savages! (Aliens) Savages!
They are lesser creatures!
Now we sound the drums of war!

-Intermission-

[Taldeer]
They're going to kill him at sunrise, Grandmother Wraithbone.

[Grandmother Wraithbone]
You have to stop them!

[Taldeer]
I can't...

[Grandmother Wraithbone]
Child, remember your vision-

[Taldeer]
I was wrong, Grandmother Wraithbone, I followed the wrong path! I feel so lost...

[Taldeer]
The auspex... The spinning arrow...

[Grandmother Wraithbone]
It's the arrow from your vision!

[Taldeer]
I was right, it was pointing to him! Sunrise...

[Grandmother Wraithbone]
It's not too late, child! Let the spirits of the webway guide you! You know your path, child, now follow it!

-Part 2-
[Taldeer]
Is there nothing I can do?
Can I make these soldiers yield?
Is it only death that waits
Out there on the battlefield?

[Inquisitor Ratcliffe]
This will be the day ...
(Let's go men!)

[Eldrad]
This will be the morning ...
(Bring out the prisoner!)

[Grey Knights and Aspect Warriors]
We will see them dying in the dust

[Taldeer]
I don't know what I can do
Still, I know that I must try

[Grey Knights]
Now we make them pay

[Taldeer]
Isha, help my feet to fly

[Rangers]
Now without a warning ...

[Taldeer]
Kurnous, help my heart be great

[Grey Knights]
Now we leave them blood and bone and rust

[Taldeer]
Spirits of the wraithbone cry ...

[Grey Knights and Aspect Warriors]
It's them or us

[Taldeer]
Please don't let it be to late ...

[Grey Knights and Aspect Warriors]
They're just a bunch of
Filthy, stinking

[Grey Knights]
Aliens!

[Aspect Warriors]
Savages!

[Grey Knights]
Daemons!

[Aspect Warriors]
Primates!

[Inquisitor Ratcliffe]
Kill them!

[Aspect Warriors]
Savages!

[Grey Knights]
Aliens!

[Inquisitor Ratcliffe+Grey Knights]
What are we waiting for?

[All]
Destroy their evil race
Until there's not a trace left

[Taldeer]
How loud are the drums of war

[Grey Knights and Aspect Warriors]
We will sound the drums of war
(Savages! Savages!)
Now, we sound the drums of war
(Aliens! Aliens!)

[Inquisitor Ratcliffe]
They shall all succumb
The rotten xenos scum

[Aspect Warriors]
Now we sound the drums ... of ... war!

[Grey Knights]
Of course it means the drums ... of ... war!

[Taldeer]
Is the death of all I love
Carried in the drumming of war?

[Taldeer]
No! If you kill him, you'll have to kill me too.

[Eldrad]
Daughter, stand back.

[Taldeer]
I won't! I love him...

Pocahontas: Colors of the Wind

You think I'm strange and heretical
And you've been so many places
I guess it must be so
But still I cannot see
If the heretic is me
How can there be so much that you don't know?
You don't know ...

You think you own the gadgets you use
That they are just dead things you can claim
But I know every gun and cogitator
Has a life, has a spirit, has a name

You think the only people who are people
Are the people who look and think like you
But if you walk the footsteps of a stranger
You'll learn things you never knew you never knew

Have you ever heard the thunder of a titan's stride,
Or asked the lasgun why it has recoil?
Can you sing with all the voices of the machines?
Can you paint with all the colors of the oil?
Can you paint with all the colors of the oil?

Come feel the blessed current of electrodes
Come see the life support of He-On-Earth
Come examine the riches all around you
And for once, appreciate just what they're worth

The drop pod and the cruiser are my brothers
And all the power weapons are my friends
And we are all connected to each other
In a circuit, in a loop that never ends

How mighty can our empire grow?
If you stop our work, then you'll never know
And you'll never hear the thunder of a titan's stride.

For no matter on which task we spend our toil
We need to sing with all the voices of the machines
We need to paint with all the colors of the oil

You can own all of Space and still
Its just empty space until
You can paint with all the colors of the oil

Jungle Book: I Wanna Be Like You

Now I'm of caste Ethereal

Oh, a Tau VIP

I've reached the top and had to stop

And that's what botherin' me

I wanna be a man, gue'la

And stroll right onto Terra

And be able to approach the Golden Throne

And end this warring era!

Oh, oobee doo

I wanna be like you

I wanna walk like you

Talk like you, too

You'll see it's true

A xenos like me

Can learn to be human too

Gee, mister Aun

You're doin' real good

Now here's your part of the deal, cuz

Lay the secret on me of man's psyker powers

But I'm not a psyker!

Now don't try to kid me, gue'la

I made a deal with you

What I desire is man's psychic power

To make my dream come true

Give me the secret, gue'la

Clue me what to do

Give me the power of man's warp flower

So I can be like you

The Great Mouse Detective: The World's Greatest Criminal Mind

[Ratigan]
My friends, we are about to embark on the most odious, the most evil, the most diabolical scheme of my illustrious career. A crime to top all crimes, a crime that will live in infamy!

Tomorrow evening, our beloved planetary governess celebrates her diamond jubilee. And, with the enthusiastic help of our good friend Magos Flaversham, it promises to be a night she will never forget. Her last night, and my first, as supreme ruler of all Londinium Prime!

From the brain that brought you the Black Bell Caper The head that made headlines on every dataslate And wondrous things like the Gunmetal Job That cunning display that made all hivers sob

Now comes the real tour de force Tricky and wicked, of course! My earlier crimes were fine for their times But now that I’m at it again An even grimmer plot has been simmering In my great criminal brain

[Chorus]
Even meaner? You mean it? Worse than the widows and orphans you drowned? You’re the best of the worst around Oh Ratigan Oh Ratigan The rest fall behind To Ratigan To Ratigan Lord Tzeentch’s greatest criminal mind!

[Ratigan]
Ratigan (speaking) Thank you, thank you. But it hasn’t all been Amasec and Caviar. I’ve had my share of adversity, thanks to that miserable second-rate inquisitor, Basil of Baker Hive! For years, that insufferable pipsqueak has interfered with my plans. I haven’t had a moment’s peace of mind. But now, all that’s in the past! This time, nothing, not even Basil can stand in my way! All will bow before me!

[Chorus]
Oh Ratigan Oh Ratigan You’re tops and that’s that To Ratigan To Ratigan

[Bartimus]
To Ratigan, the sector's greatest Khornate.

[Ratigan]
What was THAT?! WHAT DID YOU CALL ME?!

[Mutant 1]
Oh, he didn't mean it my lord.

[Mutant 2]
I-it was just a slip of one of his tongues!

[Ratigan]
I am NOT A KHORNATE!

[Mutant 3]
'Course you're not, you're Tzeentchian!

[Mutant 4]
Yeah, that's right, Tzeentchian!

[Mutant 5]
A really angry Tzeentchian!

[Ratigan]
SILENCE!! Oh my dear Bartimus, I'm afraid that you've gone and upset me...you know what happens when someone upsets me... I trust there will be no further interruptions. And now, as you were singing...?

[Chorus]
Even louder! We'll shout it! No one can doubt what we know you can do You’re more evil than even you Oh Ratigan Oh Ratigan You’re one of a kind To Ratigan To Ratigan Lord Tzeentch’s greatest criminal mind!

The Lion King: Be Prepared

[Ghazghkull]
I NEVA FOUGHT YA GROTS WUZ ESSETCHUL

YOUZ RUNTY, AN' UNSPEEKABLY WEAK

BUT ME FINKS YOUZ GOT SUM POTENTCHUL

IF WAAGH IS WOT YOU REELY SEEK

[Ghazghkull]
'S KLARE FROM YER VAKANT EXPRESHUNS

DA ORK IS NOT ALL ON OP’STARES

BUT WEZ TALKIN' BOSSES AN' SUCCESSUNS

EVA YOUZ KENT BE CUGHT UNAWARES!

[Ghazghkull]
SO PREPARE FOR DA FIGHT OVVA LOIFETIME

PREPARE FOR SENSHANAL NOOZ

A SHINY NEW ERA

‘S STOMPIN’ NEARA

[Boyz]
But ‘ere getting shot op!

[Ghazghkull]
JUS’ LISSIN YA SQUIG GOB!

[Ghazghkull]
AH KNO DIS SOUNDS SORTID,

BUT YOUZ GON BE REWARDID

WHEN AT LAST AH'M GIVVIN MY TEEF

WAAAAGH WE FINALY DARED

BE PREPARED!!!

[Boyz]
Yeah! Be prepared! Wez gon be prepared! ...Fer wot?

[Ghazghkull]
DEFF OV DA BOSS!

[Boyz]
Why? Did da boss say so?

[Ghazghkull]
NO YA GROTS, SES MORK. AN' GORK TOO!

[Boyz]
Great ideah! Who ned a boss! No Boss! No Boss!

Waagh--Waagh-Waagh--Waaagh-Waaagh!

[Ghazghkull]
IDIUTS! DERE WILL BE A BOSS!

[Boyz]
But youz sed...

[Ghazghkull]
AH WILL BE BOSS! WAAAGH WIW ME AND YOUZ NEVA GON BE KRAMPED AGAIN!

[Boyz]
Yay! Awwwwwwroight! 'ail to da Boss!

[Chorus]
'AIL TO DA BOSS

'AIL TO DA BOSS!!!

SEEMS DAT WE'LL SOON BE KONNEKTID

TO A BOSS WHO'LL BE ALL TIME ADORD

[Ghazghkull]
OV’KOURSE, KVID PRO KVO, YOUZ EXPECTID

TO BRING CERTAIN DUTYZ ONBOARD

DA FUCHA IZ LITTERD WIW TROPHIES

AN DOUGH BIGGEST BOSS AH 'ILL BE

DA POINT DAT AH MUST EMFASAZ ES:

YA WON'T GET TA WAAAAAAAAAAAAGH WIWOUT ME!!!!

[Ghazghkull]
SO GIT PREPARED FOR DA WAAAAAAGH OV’ DA CENTURY!
[Chorus]
(Oooh!)
[Ghazghkull]
BE PREPARED FOR DA BRUTALEST KUNNIN
[Chorus]
(Oooh Waagh, Waagh, Waagh!)
[Ghazghkull]
MASSIVELY CHOPPY!
[Chorus]
(We’ll haf Waagh!)
[Ghazghkull]
DED BIG AN’SHOOTY!
[Chorus]
(En’less Waagh!)
[Ghazghkull]
CRED’IBLY STOMPY!
[Chorus]
(‘Ere we go!)
[Ghazghkull]
WILL MAKE SURE THAT ME!
[Chorus]
(Fo’ da Waagh!)
[Ghazghkull]
BE DA BOSS UNDISPUTED
[Chorus]
(Aaaaaaah...)
[Ghazghkull]
RESPECTID, SALUTID
[Chorus]
(...aaaaaaah!)
[Ghazghkull]
AN' SEEN FER DA BOSS DAT AH AM
[Chorus]
(Oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo)
[Ghazghkull]
YES MA' CHOPPAS AN SHOOTAS ARE BEARED BE PREPARED!!!

[All]
WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!

Aladdin: A Whole New World

[Ghazghkull]
I’ll kill da ooniverse!
Burn’s it, smash’s it, stomp’s it!
Tell me Yarrick now when’s did I last
Get’s a nice surprise?

[Yarrick]
Well, just open your eyes!

[Ghazghkull]
Look at all of dese wonders!
So much chance ‘ere for plunders
On a mighty fighitn ride!
Armageddon!
With kool, amazin rockrete pits
Not normal humie runts
An’ no weak punts
Or tribes of smaller orkish gits

[Yarrick]
Armageddon!
A wondrous place of giant hives
Where billions of souls
Live like moles
Never see the sky in all their lives

[Ghazghkull]
Never da sky in all dere lives

[Yarrick]
Unbelievable war
Orks coming on them like rain
Fighting, dying and much pain
Through deserts of blackened waste
Armageddon!

[Ghazghkull]
Don’t you dare leave dis place!

[Yarrick]
A hundred million fallen souls

[Ghazghkull]
I’s wants you to stay ‘ere

[Yarrick]
There’s so much shooting here,
And so much fear
I won’t ever leave this war-torn world

[Ghazghkull]
Armageddon

[Yarrick]
I think I am stuck here

[Ghazghkull]
Wit new fun chances of fightin

[Yarrick]
Everyday it gets harder

[Both]
I’ll chase you, gun in hand
Across this land
Let me share Armageddon
with you

[Ghazghkull]
Armageddon

[Yarrick]
Armageddon

[Ghazghkull]
Dat’s where I waaaagh

[Yarrick]
That’s where I stand

[Ghazghkull]
A fight at hand!

[Yarrick]:
On this black sand

[Both]
So don’t you leave!

Mulan: I'll Make a Tau Out of You

Let's begin your training - to defeat the Orks
Did they send me Fio'las when I asked for Shas?
The orks will try to kill us all
But they will hit an endless wall
Mister, I'll make a tau from you all

Patient as a gun drone
But on plasma within
Once you aim your rifle
You are sure to win
You're a spineless, mob of idiots
And you haven't got a clue
Somehow I'll make a tau out of you

I'm never gonna catch my breath
I bet I'm gonna get us all shot
Boy, was I a fool in school for cutting gym
This guy's got 'em scared to death
I bet I'm gonna get us all caught
Now I really wish that I knew how to swim

(Chorus:)
Be a tau
We must be sleek as the Barracuda
Be a tau
With all the force of a orca dropship
Be a tau
With all the strength of a mighty railgun
Magnificent as the bright side of the good

Time is racing toward us till the Orks arrive
Heed my every order and you might survive
You're a pain to me, a bane to me
So pack up, deport you're through
How could I make a tau out of you?

(Chorus:)
Be a tau
We must be swift as the Barracuda
Be a tau
With all the force of a Orca dropship
Be a tau
With all the strength of a mighty railgun
Magnificent as the bright side of the good

(Chorus:)
Be a tau
We must be swift as the Barracuda
Be a tau
With all the force of a Orca Dropship
Be a tau
With all the strength of a mighty railgun
Magnificent as the bright side of the good

Beauty and the Beast: Angron

[Kharn:] Gosh it disturbs me to see you, Angron
Without a good war to wage
Every guy here'd love to be you, Angron
Even when frothing with rage
Every single World Eater was sired by you
Every man before you shall bow
Ev'ryone's awed and inspired by you
And it's not very hard to see how

No one's slick as Angron
No one's sick as Angron
No one wields a chainaxe quite as quick as Angron
For there's no man around half as hearty
Perfect, a prime specimen
You ask any Adeptus Astartes
And they'll tell you whose Chapter they want to be in

[Berzerkers:] No one's been like Angron
Had thick skin like Angron
[Kharn:] No one's able to create a din like Angron
[Angron:] As a Primarch, yes, I'm intimidating
[Berzerkers:] My what a guy, that Angron

Give five "hurrahs!"
"For the Skull Throne!"
[Kharn:] Angron is the best
And the rest are all boned

[Berzerkers:] No one fights like Angron
Or ignites like Angron
[Champion:] In a riot nobody incites like Angron
[Daemonettes:] For there's no one as fearsome or angry
[Angron:] My raw energy cannot be caged
[Kharn:] Not a bit of him's scraggly or mangy
[Angron] (That's right!)
I'm bursting with boundless and unbridled rage

[Berzerkers:] No one hits like Angron
[Raptor:] Fights in pits like Angron
[Kharn:] In a BloodBowl match no one can blitz like Angron
[Angron:] I'm especially fond of obliterating
(Kablooey!)
[Berzerkers:] Ten points for Angron!

[Angron:] In the arena I received nerve implants
So I'd fight with no fear or remorse
So I gave my legion the same nerve implants
Now they are an unstoppable force

[Berzerkers:] No one shoots like Angron
No one loots like Angron
[Kharn:] Crushes skulls under ceremite boots like Angron
[Angron:] I use enemy heads for my decorating
[Berzerkers:] My what a guy, Angron!

Mulan: A God Worth Killing For

[Pre-heresy marines]
It’s a long time since we’ve seen a sign of our home

[Angron] Like a mindless grox, I guess we are doomed to roam

[Pre-heresy marines]
Amidst the clash of wars, our orders, are easy to ignore

[Horus]
Hey!
Imagine bowing to a god worth KILLING for?

[Pre-heresy marine]
Huh?

[Horus]
That’s what we need, a god worth KILLING for!

[Fulgrim]
I want one with a perfect form with skin that has no scars

[Angron]
My god will have a pair of horns, with hide as red as Mars

[Magnus]
I couldn’t care less about war or about dreams
It all depends on sneaky schemes

[pre-heresy marines]
Maim kill burn
Ah!

[Angron]
And the other Legions think they’re fighting for Man?

[Horus]
But they still ignore the rewards of a god’s plan

[pre-heresy marines]
Right now all we do for our cause is fight chore after chore

[Horus]
What do we need?

[pre-heresy marines]
A god worth KILLING for!

[Angron]
I think my god demands skulls

[Magnus]
Mine leaves no chance unmined

[Alpharius]
Uh…How bout a...god that destroys all
Exterminates mankind?

[All]
Neh…

[Mortarion]
My many pleas grant me disease that makes stomachs stir

[Angron]
My pleas make me a blood-mad KILLER

[Horus]
I’ve a god who can mix his fate into all lands

[Angron]
But I’ve a god who has such destructive hands

[pre-heresy marines]
When we have our gods not one of us will need the Emperor

[Horus]
What do we need?

[Pre-heresy marines]
A god worth KILLING for

(Marching in from the other side, the loyalist marines come, in the middle of their own song)

[Guilliman]
Who do we love?

[Loyalist marines]
Our mighty Emperor!
(Whistling)
Our mighty Emper…

(They freeze in horror, confronted by the pre-heresy marines, now full chaos space marines)

Mulan: Honor to us all

This is what you give me to work with?
Well Sister, I've seen worse.
We're gonna turn this Sow's ear
Into an adamanitum purse

We'll have you trained and armed.
Indoctrinated till you are alarmed.
Trust my recipe and Chaos'll be harmed
You'll bring glory to us all

Wait and see, when we're through
The boys will gladly go to war with you.
With good fortune and a great hair-do
You'll bring glory to us all.

A girl can bring her family
great glory in one way
By fighting for the Emprah
And this could be the day

The Priests wants girls with good taste (Calm, obedient)
Who works fast paced
With a good bolter and a tiny waist
You'll bring glory to us all

We all must serve our Emperor
Who guards us from his son
The men by being guards
But the girls will get it done

When we're through you can't fail
Like the Emperor you will prevail
How could any Priest say no sale?
You'll bring glory to us all.

[Canoness] An imperial eagle for serenity, a skull for devotion
Flasks of promethium for beauty
You must proudly show it
Add another skull, just for luck
And even you can't blow it!

[Sister] Emperor hear my plea!
Help me not to make a fool of me!
And to not taint your great glory!
Keep the Imperium standing tall!
As scary as the great deceiver
We will face the unbeliever!

[Citizens] Destiny guard our girls
And our future as it fast unfurls
Please look kindly on these armoured pearls
Each a perfect soldier in your name!

Please bring glory to us
Please bring glory to us
Please bring glory to us
Please bring glory to us all

The Hunchback of Notre Dame: Hellfire

[Inquisitor Frollo]: Have mercy, my Emprah, You know I am a righteous man. Of my virtue I am justly proud.

Have mercy, my Emprah, You know I'm so much purer than The common, vulgar, heretical crowd!

Then tell me, my Emprah Why I see her standing there, Why her ghosthelm's eyes still scorch my soul?

I feel her, I see her! The sun caught in her spirit stones Is blazing in me out of all control!

Like fire! Warpfire! This fire in my skin! This burning Desire Is turning me to sin!

It's not my fault! I'm not to blame! It is the Eldar girl, the Witch who set this flame!

It's not my fault, It's Tzeentch's plan! He made foul xenos so much stronger than a man!

Protect me, my Emprah! Don't let foul Taldeer cast her spell! Don't let heresy sear my flesh and bone! Destroy the Farseer! And let her feel Chaos's flames Or else let her be mine and mine alone!

[Guardsman]: Inquisitor Frollo, the Eldar witch has escaped.

[Inquistor Frollo]: What?

[Guardsman]: She's nowhere in the fortress...she's gone.

[Inquisitor Frollo]: But how, I...nevermind! Get out, you idiot!

I'll find her! I'll find her if I have to glass the entire system!

Warpfire! Dark fire! Now Taldeer, it's your turn! Choose me or Your pyre! Be mine or you will BURN!

Emprah's mercy on me...

Emprah's mercy on her...

But she will be mine or SHE WILL BURN!!!

Aladdin:Daemon Prince Ali

Prince Ali! Mighty is he, Ali ababwa!

Strong as 10 Space Marine men definitely!

He has faced the Zealoting hordes

A hundred Grey Knights with swords

Who sent those Fools to their lord?

Why, Prince Ali...

He's got seventy-five golden Screamers

Purple Horrors He's got fifty-three

When it comes to exotic-type Daemons

Has he got a warp?

I'm telling you, it's a world-class Daemonology!

Prince Ali! Handsome is he, Ali Ababwa

That physique! How can I speak

Weak at the knee

Well, reality is what we shall tear,

we'll shatter the veil, so prepare

To gawk and grovel and stare at Prince Ali!

He's got ninety-five White Scar mon-keighs

(He's got the mon-keighs, let's see the mon-keighs)

And imbues all with mutations for free

(He's generous, so generous)

He's got slaves, he's got servants and flunkies (Proud to worship him)

They bow to his whim love serving him

They're just feverish with loyalty to Ali! Prince Ali!

Prince Ali!

Amorous he! Ali Ababwa!

Heard your planet was a sight lovely to see

And that, good people, is why he got dolled up and dropped by

With sixty Juggernauts, bloodletters galore

With his Fiends and Nurglings

A war band and more

With his forty Flamers, his cultists, his traitors

His Furies that warble on key

Make way for prince Ali!

Little Mermaid: Pillage This World

An Imperial forgeworld!

Chaos be praised!

Red Corsairs, to your drop pods,

your armaments raised!

We'll have plenty of slaves and loot

to haul back to the Maelstrom

Look at those stockpiles

they've got quite a hoard!

What shall we slaughter them with?

Bolter? Chainsword?

Looking around here, you'd think

"We're going to kill and enslave everything!"

I slaughter Conscripts and Guardsmen and Ratlings!

I've killed Ogryns, Space Marines, and more! You see a Rhino?

I see a trophy!

For all of the mayhem, and treasure

We'll wage war!

We like to eviscerate and mutilate

grab a Chainaxe, and slice up some bitches

watching the Guardsman scream at the lack of his - what was that?

Spleen?

When you're marked by the dark gods,

life's a lot of fun!

Your day is filled with murder and bloodshed!

You get to indulge in that activity of Slaanesh's - what was that?

Rape?

You're all going to die,

or at least be enslaved

bow down to the dark gods

and you may be saved!

With diabolical glee

It's going to be me

who pillages this world!

How could I glance

At a Land Raider

and not steal it?

How could I listen

to the Guardsmen's shrill screams

and not laugh?

I'd break a Commissar's back

before I'd rack

his corpse to

the hull of my Rhino

perforated on top of the bladed

rows of spines on top of the roof

We Chaos Lords so seldom get bored!

When we've our dark urges, we gleefully fulfill them!

After we've conquered and plundered

we simply move on!

Let flames consume all!

Let the galaxy burn!

We'll defile the

Imperium at every turn!

Can you not see?

It's going to be me, who pillages this world!

Little Mermaid: Under the Sea

The shoeshine is always brighter On somebody else's boot
Fools dream about betraying the Emprah' But such feelings I shall root.
Just think of the pains you'll suffer Behind my punishment door
Such a painful death awaits you So think of those things no more!

No Heresy
No Heresy
Soldier it's better
Free of my fetters
Take it from me
Out in the Eye they have no hope
In pain forever they must cope
While we devotin'
Full time to promotin'
No Heresy

Here in His light, we're happy
As off through miasma they stay
The Lost in the Eye ain't happy
They mourn 'cause the lost the way
But daemons in the Eye is lucky
Cause heretics here I'll find,
That day when I reveal their trech'ry
Guess who's gon' blow their mind? (Soldier: You-? *BLAM*)

No Heresy
No Heresy
Nobody beat us
Enslave or treat us
Ingloriously
We what the daemons like to corrupt
No heresy and their plans disrupt
We got no worries
Nor fear of furies
No Heresy
No Heresy
Since duty's first here
We suffer no fear
Naturally
Even the surgeon an' the vox
They get the urge to cleanse the pox
We got the spirit
You got to hear it
No Heresy

The guard fights so hard
The marines look so mean
The AdMech fix da tech
And they prayin' serene
The priests kill the beasts
Ogryns start clobberin'
The psyker has lost his soul! (Psyker: What about my sou-?*BLAM*)
The tanks crush da flanks
Ratlings, their rifles bring
The stormies fallin' out
The sisters, they sing!
The guard and navy
They never are lazy
An' oh I purge the foe!

No Heresy
No Heresy
When a foul daemon
Tries to corrupt men
My pistol fires free
What do they got? A lot of blood
We spill theirs in sod and mud
Each single man here
know how to pray here
No Heresy
Each young conscript here
My great wrath fear
No Heresy
Each vet'ran here
Know how to last here
That's why it's surer
To live more purer
No matter our places
We in the Emprah's graces
No Heresy

Dreamworks Adaptations

Although less prolific than Disney, some of Dreamworks' titles show great promise.

The Prince of Egypt: Playing with the Big Boys

[Cult Leaders]
By the power of Tzeentch...
Nurgle...Khorne...Slaanesh...Malal...
Magnus...Lorgar...Curze...Angron...
Fulgrim...Khârn...Lucius...Typhus...
Mortarion...Perturabo...
Abaddon...Alpharius...Erebus...Slyte...
Fabius...Ahriman...
Tzeentch...Nurgle...Khorne...Slaanesh...
Magnus...Lorgar...Curze...Angron...
Fulgrim...Khârn...Typhus...Lucius...
Malal...Slaanesh...Khorne...Nurgle...Tzeentch...

So you think you've got friends on High Terra
With the power to put us on the run
Well, forgive us if we give a chortle
You'll know what power is when we are done
Mortal...

You're playing with the daemons now
Playing with the daemons now (Oh, that's nice...)
Every spell and gesture
Tells you who's your master
You're playing with the daemons now

You're playing with the daemons now
You're playing with the daemons now
Stop this vain resistance
Embrace your true existence
Give in to temptation now
Pick up your powerfist, boy
You're playing with the daemons now!

[Chanting Cultists]
By the power of Tzeentch
Nurgle, Khorne, Slaanesh, Malal
Magnus, Lorgar, Curze, Angron
Mortarion, Perturabo
Malal, Slaanesh, Khorne, Nurgle...

[Cult Leaders]
You're playing with the daemons now
You're playing with the daemons now
By the might of Horus
You will kneel before us
Kneel to our splendorous power...
You try to keep faith
But you know we're right
And just to show we feel no spite
You can be our acolyte
But first, boy, it's time to betray
(All the way!)
Or your soul will be consumed, boy
You're playing with the daemons now
Playing with the daemons
Now!

The Prince of Egypt: The Plagues

[Chorus]
Thus said the Gods:
Since you refuse to yield your reign
All through the Imperium of Man...

I send your soldiers on thy self
Into your space, throughout the void
Onto your worlds, into your streets
Into your habs, into your forts
Upon your ranks, on your troops
Upon your people in your hives
Into your minds, into your souls
Until you break, until you yield
I send the swarm, I send the horde
Thus said the Gods!

[Horus]
Once I called you father
Once I thought the chance
to make you proud
Was all I ever wanted...

[Chorus]
I send the thunder from the sky
I send the fire raining down

[Horus]
And even now I wish the Gods
had chose another
Serving as your foe on their behalf
Is the last thing that I wanted...

[Chorus]
I send a hail of burning ice
On every field, on every hive

[Horus]
This was my home
All this pain and devastation
It never had to be this way
All the warriors who suffer
From your stubbornness and pride...

[Chorus]
I send such fleets out through the void
The galaxy has never seen
On every globe, on every world
Until there's nothing left of green
I send my scourge, I send my sword
Thus said the Gods!

[Emperor]
You who I called my son
Why must you call down another blow?

[Chorus]
I send my scourge, I send my sword

[Horus]
Let my warriors rule

[Horus and Chorus]
Thus said the Gods

[Emperor]
You who I called my son
How could you have come to hate me so?
Is this what you wanted?

[Chorus]
I send the swarm, I send the horde...

[Emperor]
Then let my heart be hardened
And never mind how high the cost may grow
This will still be so:
I will never let my empire go...

[Chorus]
Thus said the Gods:

[Horus]
Thus said the Gods:

[Emperor]
I will not...

[Horus, Emperor, and Chorus]
Let your (my) empire go!

The Prince of Egypt: Deliver us

[Kabalite Warriors]
Blood...Sweat...Pain...Soul...Faster!
Blood...And lift...Soul...And Pull
Pain...And raise up...Soul...Faster!

[Imperial Slaves]
With the sting of the whip on my shoulder
With the salt of my sweat on my brow
Emperor, God up high
Can you hear your people cry:
Help us now
This dark hour...

Deliver us
Hear our call
Deliver us
Lord of all, remember us, here in this burning waste
Deliver us
There's a world you promised us
Deliver us to the promised world...

[Yocheved - Imperial captured agent]
Yal-di ha-tov veh ha-rach
(My good and tender son)
Al ti-ra veh al tif-chad
(Don't be frightened and don't be scared)
My son, I have nothing I can give
But this chance that you may live
I pray we'll meet again
If He will deliver us

(song is either high or low gothic, whichever works)

[Slaves]
Deliver us
Hear our prayer
Deliver us
From despair
These years of slavery grow too cruel to stand
Deliver us
There's a world you promised us
Deliver us
Out of bondage and
Deliver us to the promised world...

[Yocheved]
Hush now, my baby
Be still, love, don't cry
Sleep as you're embraced by God
Sleep and remember my last lullaby
So he'll be with you when you dream

(Yocheved gives the baby to a Marine Scout scouting the planet)

Marine, o marine
Fly gently for me
Such precious cargo you bear
Do you know somewhere
he can live free?

[Young SOB Initiate]
Brother, you're safe now
And safe may you stay
For I have a prayer just for you:
Grow, baby brother
Come back someday
Come and deliver us, too...

[Slaves]
Deliver us
Send a shepherd to shepherd us
And deliver us to the promised world

[Yocheved]
Deliver us!
Marine, deliver him there...

Other Sources

Through random circumstance or creative providence, some songs and poems lend themselves to grimdarking regardless of what media they are tied to.

Queen: Bohemian Rhapsody

Iz dis da real life?
Iz dis jus' fannasy?
Caught in a big push,
No 'scape from reality.
Open ya eyes, Look up at da skies and see,
I's jus' a poor boy, dun need no sympafy,
'Cause I'm big 'n mean, not a grot, chop and smash, shoot a lot,
Any way the waaagh goes doesn't really matter to me, to me.

Warboss, just killed an ork,
Put mah dakka 'gainst 'is 'ead, pulled my trigger, now 'e's dead.
Warboss, waaagh had just begun,
But now I's gone and shot up all ya nobs.
Warboss, ooh, Didn' mean ta make ya mad,
If I's not back again dis time tomorra,
Keep stompin', keep stompin' as if nuffin' really matters.

Too late, I gots shot up,
Sends hurtin' down me spine, body's aching all the time.
Goodbye, ev'rybody, I've got to go,
Gotta leave you all behind and face da troof.
Warboss, ooh, I dun' wanna die,
I sometimes wish I'd never waaaghed at all.

I see a little silhouetto of a beakie,
Zoggin' humies, Zoggin' humies, is it your turn to stomp now?
Thundabolts and Lightnins, very, very fright'ning me.
(Gorkamorka.) Gorkamorka. (Gorkamorka.) Gorkamorka, Gorkamorka Gork n' Mork
Waaaaagh! I's just a poor boy an' nobody loves me.
'E's just a poor boy from a poor goff tribe,
Spare 'im 'is loife from dis monstrosity.
Easy come, easy go, will yas lemme go?
Xenos! No, we will not let you go.
(Let him go!) Xenos! We will not let you go.
(Let him go!) Xenos! We will not let you go.
(Let me go.) Will not let you go.
(Let me go.) Will not let you go. (Let me go.) Ah.
No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
(Oh Brother Captain, Brother Captain.) Bruvva Kaptin, lemme go.
Da Commissar 'as a boltgun put aside for me, for me, for me.

So you fink you can shoot me and spit in my eye?
So you fink you can curse me and leave me to die?
Oh, snotling, can't do dis to me, snotling,
Jus' gonna get out, jus' gotta get stompin' again!

Nuffin' really matters, Anyone can see,
Nuffin' really matters,
Nuffin' really matters to me.

Any way the waaagh goes.

Robert Browning: My Last Duchess

   That's my last adjutant painted on the wall, 

   Looking as if she were alive. I call 

   That piece a wonder, now: The Confessor 

   Worked busily that day, and there she stands. 

   Will't please you sit and look at her? I said 

   Confessor by design, for never read 

   Strangers like you that pictured countenance, 

   The depth and passion of its earnest glance, 

   But to myself they turned (since none puts by 

   The curtain I have drawn for you, but I) 

   And seemed as they would ask me, if they durst, 

   How such a glance came there; so not the first 

   Are you to turn and ask thus. Sir, 'twas not 

   My orders only, called that eager spot, 

   Of joy into her pallid cheek; perhaps 

   A Guardsman chanced to say "She wears her cap 

   Askew, as it please her," or "Prayer 

   Must never hope to match a lock of her hair 

   Taken from her head": such stuff 

   Was unacceptable, I thought, and cause enough 

   For flagellation (she did not). She had 

   An attitude - how shall I say - relaxed 

   Too easily beguiled; she listened to anything 

   She looked on, and her ears heard many things. 

   Sir, 'twas all one! Morning prayers, arrests, 

   The whispers of the Dark Gods in her breast, 

   The impious jibes some vulgar soldier 

   Would throw her way, unaware of her 

   Position and my power. All and each 

   would draw from her alike the approving speech, 

   Or an ear at least. She took confession - good - but prayed 

   Somehow - I know how now - as if her faith was any other jade. 

   A heretic. Who'd stoop to blame 

   This sort of crime? Even had you time 

   For a trial - which I had not - for heretic slime 

   And to say she burns, and to say "Just This 

   Is your fair fate, you lying bitch, 

   Traitor to the Emperor" - and if she let 

   Herself be lessoned so, nor plainly set 

   Her wits to yours, forsooth, and made excuse, 

   - E'en then would be some stooping, and I choose 

   Never to stoop. Oh sir, she prayed, no doubt, 

   On every feast, but which gods blessed without 

   Those same prayers? This became clear. I made commands. 

   Then prayers turned into screams. There she stands, 

   As if alive. Will't please you rise? We'll meet 

   The Governor below, then. I repeat, 

   The Inquisition's munificence 

   Is ample warrant that no just pretence 

   Of confession will be disallowed; 

   Though to find heresy, as I avowed, 

   At starting, is my object. Nay, we'll go 

   Together down, sir. Notice this seal, though, 

   The skull and I, together as you see, 

   Which gives certain... powers to me. 

Charlie Daniels Band: The Devil Went Down to Georgia

The daemon went down to Terra,
He was looking for a soul to steal.
He was in a bind 'cos he was way behind: he was willin' to make a deal.
When he came across this young man chainswordin' on a fiddle and playin' it hot.
And the daemon jumped upon a hickory stump and said: "Boy, let me you what:"
"I bet you didn't know it, but I'm a fiddle player too."
"And if you'd care to take a dare, I'll make a bet with you."
"Now you play a pretty good fiddle, boy, but give the daemon his due:"
"I bet a fiddle of gold against your soul, 'cos I think I'm better than you."
The boy said: "Mah nahme's Boreale ahnd it might be ah sin,"
"But Ah'll take yooouuur bet, yoouugghhrr gonna regrort, 'cos Ah'm the best thawt's ever beahn."

Boreale, rosin up your bow and play your fiddle hard,
'Cause hellwarp's broke loose in Terra and Tzeentch deals the cards.
And if you win you get this shiny fiddle made of gold.
But if you lose, the daemon gets your soul.

The daemon opened up his case and he said, "I'll start this show."
And blue fire flew from his fingertips as he rosined up his bow.
And he pulled the bow across the strings and it made an evil hiss.
Then a band of Nurglings joined in and it sounded somethin' like this:
When the daemon finished, Boreale said,
"Worl, you're prehtty guud, oorrld sawn,"
"But sit dorn in that cheer rigghht ther and let me show you whore it's dorne"

Fire on the monolith.
Run, boys, run
Slaanesh in the House of the Rising Sun.
Squiqs in the bread pan pickin' out dough.
Granny, does your cyberdog bite?
No, child, no.

The daemon bowed his head because he knew that he'd been beat.
And he laid that golden fiddle on the ground at Boreale's feet.
Boreale said, "Daemon, just cuhm on baahhck if you ever wahnt to trah agahin."
"'Cause Ah told you once, you son of a grot,"
"Ah'm the best that's evah bihn."

Iron Maiden: Aces High

There goes da sirun dat warns o' da air raid
Den comz da sound o' da shootaz: DakDakkaDak
Owt fer da scramble we've godda git airborne
Godda git up fer da comin' attak.

Jump in da cockpit an start up da enginz
Lode up da grotz derz no time to muck about
Gavverin' speed as weeb 'ed down da runway
Godda git airborne an smoke dose gitz out

Scurryin', scramblin', flyin'
Rollin', turnin', divin', goin' in again
Scurryin', scramblin', flyin'
Rollin', turnin', divin'
Scurry, liv ter fly, fly ter liv, du or die
Won't ya scurry, liv ter fly, fly ter liv, Deffskwad 'igh.

Move in ter fire at da mainstream o' bombaz
Giv em some dakka an den turn away
Roll ober, spin round ter cumz in behind 'em
Move ter their blindsidz an firin' again

Runtie ships oe'r da Horizon, muv in behin' us
Down on da ground dere's jes deadboys and lootaz
'Eading up an turnin' our flash ter mug dem
'Eading straight fer dim meeb per-ss down on mi shootaz.

Rollin', turnin', divin'
Rollin', turnin', divin' ('ere we go agin!)
Rollin', turnin', divin'
Rollin', turnin', divin'
Scurry, liv ter fly, fly ter liv, du or die
Won't ya scurry, liv ter fly, fly ter liv, Deffskwad 'igh

Iron Maiden: The Trooper

You’ll take my life but I’ll take yours too
You’ll fire you railgun but I’ll run you through
So when you're waiting for the next attack
You’d better stand there’s no turning back

The Ethereal speaks as the charge begins
But on this battlefield no one wins
The smell of acrid smoke and krootox breath
As you plunge into a certain death

The horse he sweats with fear we break to run
The mighty roar of the Tau guns
And as we race towards the xenos wall
The screams of pain as my comrades fall

We hurdle bodies that lay on the ground
And the Tau fire another round
We get so near yet so far away
We won’t live to fight another day

(Guitar Solo)

We get so close near enough to fight
When a Firewarrior gets me in his sights
He pulls the trigger and I feel the blow
A burst of rounds take my horse below

And as I lay there gazing at the sky
My body’s numb and my throat is dry
And as I lay forgotten and alone
Without a tear I draw my parting groan

My Chemical Romance: The Black Parade (Intro)

WHEN I WAS
A GUARDSMAN,
MY SERGEANT TOOK ME TO EASTERN KRONUS
TO SERVE IN VICTORY BAY

HE SAID,
"SON WHEN YOU GROW UP,
WILL YOU BE THE SLAYER OF THE MUTANT,
AND THOSE WHO GO ASTRAY?"

HE SAID
"WILL YOU DEFEAT THEM,
THE DEMONS, AND ALL THE FILTHY XENOS,
THE PLANS THAT THEY HAVE MADE?"

FOR ONE DAY, I LEAD YOU,
TO THE ELDAR, AND TAU AND ORKS AND NECRONS,
TO JOIN THE DARK CRUSADE."

Harvey Andrews: British Soldier

In a spaceport in the city a young guardsman stood
Talking to the natives there if they would
Some just stared in hatred, and others turned in pain
And the lonely guardsman boy wished he was home again

Come join glorious guard! Said the posters in his block
See new worlds and have your fun and serve your emperor
His skills were surely lacking and his family had to eat
So he took the emperors oath and enlisted for up to fight

For there was no fear of fighting, to the conquered he’d be sent
Just ten years getting paid to watch
Then leave a glorious victor, a man who’d made the grade
A medal and some land, and memories in trade

Then came the call of Tash’ren, as it had come before
Another bloody chapter in an unending war
The people stood on both sides, the people they stood behind
Another fight in futilities name, the weak against the blind

The guardsman stood between them, between the whistling stones
And then the broken bottles, that lead to more patrols
The crude bombs that burnt him, the nails that pierced his skin
And wish he’d just stayed home, working with his friends

The starport filled with people the guardsman soon was bored
But better in the port than where the soldiers warred
The room filled up with the xenos females, their younglings in tow
Who stared with itchy fingers at the guardsman and his gun

A yell of fear a pulse of engines the shattering of glass
The window of the port broke to let the package pass
A scream came from the defeated as they ran towards the door
Dragging their younglings crying from the charge upon the floor

The guardsman stood and could not move, his gun he could not use
He knew the bomb had seconds and not minutes on the fuse
He could not run and pick it up and throw it in the street
There were far too many people there, too many running feet

Take cover! yelled the guardsman, Take cover for your lives
And the Aliens threw down their young and stood before their wives
They turned towards the soldier their eyes alive with fear
For the greater good’s sake, save our children or they'll end their short lives here

The guardsman ran towards the bomb his stomach like a stone
Why was this his battle in the emperors name, why was he alone
He lay down on the package and he murmured one farewell
To those at home in Nimbossa to those he loved so well

He saw the sights of harvest felt the wind upon his brow
The young girls in the munitorum parks, how precious were they now
The soaring of the sw’it the beauty of the swilope
The music of the cheering choir so soon would it be gone

A muffled soft explosion and the room began to quake
The guardsman blown across the floor, his blood a crimson lake
There was no time to cry or shout there was no time to moan
And they turned their children's faces from the blood and from the bones

The crowd outside soon gathered and the chimeras came
To carry off the body of a pawn lost in the game
And the crowd they clapped and cheered and they sang their heretical song
One guardsman less to interfere where he did not belong

And will the young growing up learn at their mothers' knees
The story of the guardsman who bought their lives
Who used his youthful body as a means towards an end
Who gave his life to those who called him murderer not friend

Will Smith: Men In Black

Here come the Knights in Grey
Imperium's defenders
Here come the Knights in Grey
They won't let you remember

The righteous bear armor of grey, ok
Just in case they have to come and send some Daemons away
The order given to them, Or-do M
Means with ease they will banish them
So do not your eyes avert
Or Chaos with ease will soon convert
The chosen of the Emperor
Number one Daemon purgers
But to our Battle Brothers we don't exist
On our Ordos most classified list
Daemon infestation? to the Emperor pray
Cause you never know when we might save the Day, and..

Here come the Knights in Grey
Imperium's defenders
Here come the Knights in Grey
They won't let you remember

Ozzy Osbourne: Hellraiser

Im waaaaaghing on an endlis rode
around’ da world ta krump beakies good
sumtiems it ‘eels so tuff
but I still asnt ad enuf
I keep tellin dat its gettin a lot
but I no ize a liar
feelin al rite in da noize n da lite
but dats wut makes me waaaaaaaaaaaaaagh

‘ell raiser, in da funder and ‘eat
‘ell raiser, rock ya bak in ya seet
‘ell raiser, an ize gon make it come troo
‘ell raiser, ize gon do sum weird boy fings to you

Waaaaghin on anuvver world,
Anuvver hive anuvver place
sumtimes I dun feel too gud
ize get dis funny feelin an stuff
da boyz keep sayin dat its not good fer me
but bein a grot dun make it
out of control, I playz da ultimate roll
But dats wut lites my fire

Chorus

Im waaaaaghing on an endlis rode
around’ da world ta krump beakies good
sumtiems it ‘eels so tuff
but I still asnt ad enuf
out of control, I playz da ultimate roll
But dats wut lites my fire
Chorus

Nancy Sinatra: These Boots Were Made For Walking

You's keep sayin' you's got sumfing for me.
Sumfing you call WAAAGH!, but 'fess up.
You's been muckin' where ya shudn' be muckin'
An' now some uver gitz got all ya swag.

Dese gitz was made fer choppin', an' dats just wot they'll do.
One uv dese days da ladz is gunna stomp all uver you.

You's keep lootin' when you's ought ta be krumpin'
An' you's gots no wins, only beats.
You's stayin' weedy when ya ought ta be 'ard
Now wotz proppa's proppa, an' ya ain' been proppa yet.

Dese gitz was made fer choppin', an' dats just wot they'll do.
One uv dese days da ladz is gunna stomp all uver you.

You's keep sulkin' where ya 'spose ta be loud.
An' you's keep finkin' you's sumfin' speshul.
Ha! Gotz me a brand new Choppa wotz dead killy,
An' I ain' 'ad time fer breakin' it in...

Ready ya gitz? Start choppin'!

Sabaton: Attero Dominatus

Attero!
Dominatus!
The Hive is burning
Denique!
Interimo!
The Tau has fallen

We stand at the gates of the Hive
With two and a half million men
With six thousand tanks in our ranks
Use them as battering rams

Artillery leading our way
A million grenades has been launched
The xenos must pay for their crimes
The wings of the xeno’s been broken

Commander Chenkov's orders:
Serve me the Hive on a plate!
Disregard the losses
The city is ours to take

The price of a war must be payed
Millions of lives has been lost
The price must be paid by the Tau
That started the war in M.40's

The year of 200.M45
The year when the xenos will fall
We're inside the gates of the Hive
The beaks of the xeno's been broken

Commander Chenkov's orders:
Serve me its head on a plate
Disregard the losses
The xeno's land is ours to take

March!
Fight!
Die!
In the Hive!
March!
Fight!
Conquer!
The Hive!

Sabaton: Wolfpack

To the sector came the Eldar
Mars and Dictator
leading the convoy west

Took the warp gate in
The long jump back - Convoy to Gryphonne
Mars, Dauntless, Dictator leading
Titans to the forge
And upon the asteroid belt
Lies the silence of the sails
On the dog's watch in the final hour
The corsair fleets appear

On all the auspex it seems quiet and calm
Deep down below the xenos lurks

To the sector came the Eldar
Mars and Dictator
Leading the convoy west
In their own track came the wolfpack
Mars led the convoy
Into the hornet's nest

At the crack of dawn the second watch
Dauntless wracked with flames
Half the convoy hulked or disabled
Heading to Command
But below the fleet ecliptic
Out of sensor range
On the second watch in the final hour
The corsair fleets return

The Eldar come in for a second time
To make the Monkeigh face their fate

To the sector came the Eldar
Mars and Dictator
Leading the convoy west
In their own track came the wolfpack
Mars led the convoy
Into the hornet's nest

Lances blazing, fighters failing
M42 when
The Navy did fail the test
To the sector came the Eldar
Mars and Dictator
Leading them into death

Asuryan makes the contact and lead them
Isha's Tears scores a kill in the dark
She Who Thirsts sinking 4 in 2 approaches
Fading Star cut in half by a lance

Sabaton: Panzerkampf (Chaos Edition)

Into the Imperial Land the Chaotic Army March

In Segmentum Obscuros, Millennium 43
Tanks line up in thousands, as far the eye can see
Ready for the onslaught, ready for the Fight
Waiting for the Imperials, to march into the trap

Traps were placed in darkness, in the cover of the night
Waiting to be trigged, when the time is right
In the imagination imminent attack
Once the battle started there was no turning back

The end of the Imperium draws near
It’s time has come to an end
The end of an era is near
It’s time, to attack

Into Imperial land the chaotic army march
Brothers side by side to stop the Imperial charge
Titans on cadian soil a thundering release
One billion man of war the chaotic wrath unleash

Fields of western Cadia were the heat of battle burned
Suffered heavy losses the tie of war was turned
Driving back the Imperials, fighting on all fronts
Out of the Cadian sector, out of chaotic land

Reinforce the frontlines cause the imperials to retreat
Send in all reserves securing their defeat
Believers of the Dark Gods, broke the citadel
Ruins of a planet, Imperials rest in hell

The end of the Imperium draws near
It’s time has come to an end
The end of an era is near
It’s time, to attack

Into Imperial land the chaotic army march
Brothers side by side to stop the Imperial charge
Titans on cadian soil a thundering Release
One billion man of war the chaotic wrath unleash

ONWARD BROTHERS, AMRIES OF THE DARK GODS CHARGE

Oh, Lord Abbadon, conqueror of lands
Will of the Dark Gods, strongly they command
Oh, Lord Abbadon, conqueror of lands
Finally victorious the chaotic army stands

The end of the Imperium draws near
It’s time has come to an end
The end of an era is near
It’s time, to attack

Into Imperial land the chaotic army march
Brothers side by side to stop the Imperial charge
Titans on cadian soil a thundering Release
One billion man of war the chaotic wrath unleash

Sabaton: Panzerkampf

Into the Motherland the hordes of chaos March!

In the great Imperium, Summer M40-93
Tanks line up in thousands, as far the eye can see
Ready for the onslaught, ready for the fight
Waiting for the traitors, to march into the trap

Assassins creep in darkness
In the cover of the night
Waiting for the moment
When the time is right

Imminent invasion
Imminent attack
Once the battle's started
There's no turning back

The end of the [Black] Crusade draws near
Its time has come to an end
The end of an era is near
It's time to attack

Into the Motherland the hordes of chaos march!
Guardsmen, stand side by side, to stop their evil charge
Daemons on holy soil Thunder in the east.
One billion men at war, Imperial wrath unleashed

Fields of unnamed colony, feel the heat of battle burned
Suffered heavy loses losses, the tide of war has turned
Driving back the traitors, fighting on four fronts
drive them Off of this world, out of Imperim
Reinforce the frontline, force the traitors to retreat
Send in all the reserves, securing their defeat
Soldiers of Imperium broke their Citadel
"Ruined Black Crusaders: traitors rest in hell"

The end of the [Black] Crusade draws near
Its time has come to an end
The end of an era is near
It's time to attack

Into the Motherland the hordes of chaos march!
Guardsmen, stand side by side, to stop their evil charge
Daemons on holy soil Thunder in the east.
One billion men at war, Imperial wrath unleashed

Oh, great Imperium, union of worlds
Will of the Emperor, spreading his word
Oh, great Imperium, union of worlds
Once more victorious, the Imperium stands

The end of the [Black] Crusade draws near
Its time has come to an end
The end of an era is near
It's time to attack

Into the Motherland the hordes of chaos march!
Guardsmen, stand side by side, to stop their evil charge
Daemons on holy soil Thunder in the east.
One billion men at war, Imperial wrath unleashed

Sabaton: Primo Victoria

Through the storms of warp
As we go to the Emperor's side
Through the Xeno lines
Mankind Victorious!

We've been training for weeks
But we're still ready to strike
As the great Imperium will win
We're the first wave on planet
We're the first ones to fall
No soldiers drop landed before

In the dawn of war they will pay
With their lives as the price
Legends are written today
In this burning inferno
Know that nothing remains
As our flamers light up the Tau

Aiming for killshots though using a las
Victory is ours with melta and plas'!

Through the storms of warp
As we go to the Emperor's side
Through the Xeno lines
Mankind Victorious!

On a Xeno Planet
In the Ultima Segmentum
Near the Tau Empire
Doom is upon them

We've been here before
Used to this kind of war
Pulse fire goes over the trench
Our order's are easy
It's kill or be blammed
The Commissars shoot those who fail

In the dawn of war they will pay
With their lives as the price
Legends are written today
Now we're invading
The Tau worlds again
This time we know what will come

Aiming for killshots though using a las
Victory is our with melta and plas'!

Through the storms of warp
As we go to the Emperor's side
Through the Xeno lines
Mankind Victorious!

On a Xeno Planet
In the Ultima Segmentum
Near the Tau Empire
Doom is upon them

On a Xeno World
Bathed with their gore
Baneblades are turning the war
Valkyries
Soar to victory
Planetstrike

Aiming for killshots though using a las
Victory is our with melta and plas'!

Through the storms of warp
As we go to the Emperor's side
Through the Xeno lines
Mankind Victorious!

On a Xeno Planet
In the Ultima Segmentum
Near the Tau Empire
Doom is upon them

Through the storms of warp
As we go to the Emperor's side
Through the Xeno lines
Mankind Victorious!

On a Xeno Planet
In the Ultima Segmentum
Near the Tau Empire
Doom is upon them

Edgar Allen Poe: The Raven

Once upon a battlefield dreary, where I cowered, spent and bleary,
Within an Imperial bunker, darkly stained with dust and gore -
As I cowered, nearly shuttering, suddenly there came a sputtering
As some weapon quickly stuttering - firing at my bunker door.
"`Tis some bolter", I murmured, "firing at my bunker door -
Only this and nothing more."

Ah, distinctly I remember, it was in the bleak December,
And the brightly burning bastions lit the horizon by the score.
Eagerly, on freedom drunker; - vainly had I sought to hunker
In this heavy Imperial bunker - with perhaps a tunnel in the floor -
A safe and empty fortress with perhaps a tiny tunnel in the floor -
Only this and nothing more.

And the mad raving howling of each distant Space Wolf prowling
Thrilled me - filled me with fantastic terrors never felt before.
So that now, to the beating of my heart, I stood entreating
"`Tis some Space Wolf there repeating, firing at my bunker door -
Some common Grey Hunter rapid-firing at my bunker door -
This it is and nothing more."

Presently my soul grew stronger; hesitating then no longer
"Marine," said I, "or Scout, your attention I implore;
The bunker walls are thick - they are made of tempered brick
And your bolters do not nick the slightest scratch or tiny score -
Not a dimple, dent, depression, dip, scratch or tiny score -
Away now, and fire no more."

Then in the bunker slumping, presently I heard a thumping
A pounding - rattling many times fiercer than before.
And soon I began to screech - the bunker wall grenades did breach;
The very gods I did beseech as the ceiling fell upon the floor -
Through the wounds poured light which danced upon the floor -
Danced amidst the sounds of war.

Then at once it stopped the violence - I was left alone with silence
Confused, I spied the reason why the shells did drop no more -
For as I began to shutter, then with many a flit and flutter
A psyber-Raven flew through the clutter to perch above the door -
Perched on the two-headed eagle just above the bunker door -
Perched and sat and nothing more.

At this I grew more craven, for the talons of the psyber-Raven
Were all over covered with bright red blood and crimson gore.
"Wretch!" I cried, "Njal hath lent thee - into this fortress has he sent thee
So that remotely may he here be - and this bunker then explore -
Scry out my exact location and this bunker then explore -"

Quoth the Raven, "Eversor"

Then, methought, the air grew darker, the bunker now a little starker
For the uttered word brought terror as I had never felt before.
As for weapons, I knew I had none - no bolter, sword or lasgun;
No arms to stop the war's son fated to break soon through the door -
The blood-mad crazed assassin fated to break soon through the door-
Quoth the Raven, "Eversor"

"Be that word our sign of parting, machine or bird!" I shrieked, upstarting -
"Get thee back into the fire-fight and here spy on me no more!
For as you came unbidden - I would otherwise be here hidden -
Leave my location in this midden - quit that icon above my door!
Take thy shining metal eye, and take thy form from off my door!"
Quoth the Raven, "Eversor"

And the Raven, never flitting, still is sitting - still is sitting
On the pallid two-headed eagle just above the bunker door;
His metal eye has all the seeming of a psyker that is scheming,
To have my guts lie steaming in a pile upon the floor;
And now all hope has left me, crouched here upon the floor
I await the Eversor!

Henry the Fifth, Act III Scene I

Once more unto the boards, Anon, once more,
Or close the wall up with our Neckbeard dead!
In-game there's nothing so becomes a man
As massive fatness and huge faggotry;
But when the /b/last of war brings in the cancer,
Then imitate the action of the fatguy;
Quote from the rulebooks, summon up the fluff,
Disguise fat nature with hard-favour'd RAAAAGE;
Then lend the one a terrible aspect;
Let it stare until PCs are all dead
Like the foul bodak; let the brow o'erwhelm it
As fearfully as does a tiefling’s horn
Add two charisma to his contorted face,
Swirl'd in the wild and wasteful fourth-ed.
Now roll the bones and sketch the portraits wide,
Dream hard of breasts, that bend up every ‘spirit’
To his full height. On, on, you beardyest fatguys,
Whose blood is fet from fathers of thin-proof!
Fathers that, like so many useless tripfags,
Have in these parts from morn till even raged,
And saged their threads for lack of argument.
Fap not to your mothers; now attest
That those whom you call'd fatguys did beget you.
Be copy now to men of better games,
And show them how you roll. And you, warmachine,
Whose limbs are made of pewter, show us here
The metal of your minis; let us swear
That they are worth their pricetag, which I doubt much;
For I see most of you so mean and base,
That hath not showered since last Petertide.
I see you field warhounds in Apocalypse,
Standing upon their foes. The game's been lost!
Follow your spirits, and upon this board
Cry, "Rage at Vampire! Magic! And Fourth Ed!"

Nirvana: Smells Like Teen Spirit

Load up da trukks

Bring yer boyz

`Kuz we's haulin'

Out all da toyz

Da `oomies run

Frum dakka gunz

I knows I knows

We's number one

ELLO ELLO ELLO ELLO

ELLO ELLO ELLO ELLO

ELLO ELLO ELLO ELLO

ELLO ELLO ELLO-

Oomies can't `urt us wit' flamers

`Ere we go now

Orky raidaz

I squish pinkies wit' my anus

`Ere we go now

Orky raidaz

Cuz its choppy

Cuz its bashy

Cuz its dakka

Cuz we's sneaky

YA

Winnin' is what Orks do best

`Cause by Mork we's all been bless'd

Our mighty WAAAAAAAGH `as always been

And always will until the end

ELLO ELLO ELLO ELLO

ELLO ELLO ELLO ELLO

ELLO ELLO ELLO ELLO

ELLO ELLO ELLO-

Oomies can't `urt us wit' flamers

`Ere we go now

Orky raidaz

Now I'm out dere, smashin' faces

`Ere we go now

Orky raidaz

Cuz its choppy

Cuz its bashy

Cuz its dakka

Cuz we's sneaky

YA

And I forgitz

Just wot it was

Oh ya, I think a melta bomb

I found it dere

It's tikkin' now

Oh well, I'll toss it at doze grots.

ELLO ELLO ELLO ELLO

ELLO ELLO ELLO ELLO

ELLO ELLO ELLO ELLO

ELLO ELLO ELLO-

Oomies can't `urt us wit' flamers

`Ere we go now

Orky raidaz

I'm outta words, so I's WAAAAAAAAAAGH!

`Ere we go now

Orky raidaz

Cuz its choppy

Cuz its bashy

Cuz its dakka

Cuz we's sneaky

CUZ IT'S A WAAAAAAAAAGH!

CUZ IT'S A WAAAAAAAAAAGH!

CUZ IT'S A WAAAAAAAAAAAGH!

CUZ IT'S A WAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!

CUZ IT'S A WAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!

Sailor Tau

Fire caste by moonlight
Water caste by daylight
Never running from a real fight
She is the one named Sailor Tau
She will...never turn her back on a friend
She is... always there to defend
She is...the one on whom we can depend
She is the one named Sailor.....
.... Sailor Broadside
.... Sailor Stealth
.... Sailor Crisis
..... Sailor Drone
With cosmic secrets
All so new to her
She is the one named Sailor Tau
fire caste by moonlight
Water caste by daylight
With her Sailor Shas'o to help fight
She is the one named Sailor Tau
She is the one named Sailor Tau
She is the one . . . Sailor Tau!!

Coolio: Gangsta's Paradise

As I browse through the minis of my local games store
I took a look at my life and realized I’m very poor
But that's just perfect for an fa/tg/uy like me
You know, I bought that space marine battle company
At 4:30 in the morning dice are rolling
PCs are dying the whole session railroading... fools
And I've been plannin' and ragin’ so long that
Even my mother thinks that my mind is gone
I'm a man of the die, I've passed my knowledge check
Got a codex in my hand and a beard on my neck
But if I finish all my painting and if you get Matt
Then tonight I am putting on my wizard robes and hat.

We been spending most our lives
Living in an fa/tg/uy paradise
I've done FATAL once or twice
Living in an fa/tg/uy paradise
It's hard work in rolling dice
Living in an fa/tg/uy paradise
We buy minis at high price
Living in an fa/tg/uy paradise

A local boy made a Mary Sue last week
I just approved it and saved my mad critique
I really don’t mind, I didn’t even rage
‘cause I dumped the Lady of Pain on him, flaying his mage.
But I ain't never punched weeaboos even if they deserved it
A fa/tg/uy with a tool? You know that’s unheard of
I’m obese and smelly but have the best army
And my homies agree, it did win the tourney...fools
If you’re here for stories, you'll be wrecked in tears
We have C.S Goto raping well known canon with shears
But we ain't really quaint, so please don't point and stare
We are just autistically impaired

There's chainfists, chainswords, and lightning claws
In our life hobby
Like Cthulhu Mythos
It's as grim an’ dark as can be

We been spending most our lives
Living in an fa/tg/uy paradise
We're just fat and nerdy guys
Living in an fa/tg/uy paradise
There's no greater sin and vice
Living in an fa/tg/uy paradise
We all fight, by rolling dice
Living in an fa/tg/uy paradise

Hitchin' up a game group, churnin' out new content
Made a game on Sunday, soon I'll make another
Think you’re pimp at rollplay? Think you can roleplay?
I know I’m a million times more playa then you gay frey
I'm the neckbeard guy the young Gygaxes wanna be like
In the store day and night rollin’ paragon mad soulknife
So don't be vain and don't be whiny
Or else, weeaboo, I might declare Exterminatus on your army

We been spending most our lives
Living in an fa/tg/uy paradise
We’re all crazy max/min-ites
Living in an fa/tg/uy paradise
We all dare to fantasize
Living in an fa/tg/uy paradise
We’re all virgins who roll dice
Living in an fa/tg/uy paradise

Blue Oyster Cult: Black Blade

I was on a mission to fight for the Greater Good
But this here Dawn Blade at my side don't act the way it should
Keeps calling me it's Shas'O when I feel more like it's Gue'la
And it keeps dragging me faster and faster to an early grave, yeah
And it howls! It howls like hell!

I'm told it's my duty to fight against them all
That warring is my trade and I was born to wade through gore
I just want to be a lover, not a blue-skinned screaming ghoul
I wish it'd picked another to be it's killing tool

Dawn Blade, Dawn Blade
Forged a million years ago
Dawn Blade, Dawn Blade
Killing so it's power can grow

It's death from the beginning to the end of time
And I'm the Tau's champion, or is that just part of it's grand designs?
And whole worlds are dying, and the burden's mine
And the Dawn Blade keeps on killing, 'til the end of time

Dawn Blade, Dawn Blade
Bringing chaos to the world we know
Dawn Blade, Dawn Blade
And it's using me to kill my friends
Dawn Blade, Dawn Blade
Growing stronger so the galaxy will end
Forcing my mind to bend and bend

I am the Dawn Blade
Forged a million billion years ago
My cosmic soul goes on for eternity
Carving out destiny
Bringing in the Lords of Chaos
Bringing up the Beasts of the Immaterium
Sucking out the souls of heroes
Laying waste to the Imperium
My master is my slave
Hahaahahahahahahahaha!
You poor fucking Tau

'Twas The Night Before Emperor's Day

'Twas the night before Emperor's Day,
and he fought all alone,
in a four foot deep trench
lined with plasteel and stone.

I was traveling the warp
with gifts for the land,
when I saw this lone guardsman
making his brave stand.

I looked all about,
I looked near and far,
no Chimera, no Basilisk,
nor Techpriest or Commissar.

No Sergeant yelled orders
to this guardsman - no backing
to fight this ridge full of xeno
formed from pure evil, attacking.

His armor in tatters,
his eyes nearly blind,
A sobering truth
raced through my mind.

His position was doomed,
was my only thought
and this soldier's brave stand
would all be for naught.

The guardsman stared unblinking,
silent and alone,
his lasrifle at the ready
against his shoulder bone.

His gaze was so calm
in the face of calamity,
the perfect picture of
a guardsman of humanity.

Who was this brave hero
whose position I'd spied,
warring against
this unstoppable tide?

I now knew that all humans
I would see this night,
owed their lives to these guardsmen
who were willing to fight.

Soon all round the galaxy
the children would play,
and grownups would praise
the bright Emperor's Day.

They all lived their lives
every month of the year,
Because of brave guardsmen
like the one standing here.

A tear came to my eye
for those who stood alone,
on a cold Emperor's Day Eve
on a planet far from home.

Their great sacrifices
I could never betray
So I drew my burning sword
to join in the fray

The soldier did turn
and I heard a rough voice.
"My Emperor, rest easy,
this death is my choice;

I fight for a freedom
that may never be found,
but not ever shall I waver
on Your sacred ground."

Then the Guardsman turned
to face the incursions
of the foul xenos and
their unholy perversions

I kept watch for hours,
until the night was still
and the guardsman lay broken
on the bloody red hill.

I could not just leave
on that cold grim dark night,
this guardian of honor
so willing to fight.

And as the guardsman lay dying,
his soul strong and pure,
he cried, "Ave Imperator!
It's Emperor's Day! This world is secure!"

I kneeled before the fallen,
A great victory he'd won.
"Happy Emperor's Day my guardsman,
rest in peace, my son."

Daniel Decateur Emmett: Dixie Land

No one knows how this all started
But it don't surprise us empty-hearted-
Get Away! Get Away! Get Away, xenos scum!

When those came up in that ole half-track
We found the nerve to now push back!
Get Away! Get Away! Get Away, xenos scum!

Advance the flag there trooper! Hoorah! Hoorah!
On far off lands we'll take our stand-
And not die bloody cowards!

To arms! To arms! And purge the fuckin' xenos!
To arms! To arms! And purge the fuckin' xenos!

Now John Fuklaw was an awesome sight,
And rallied us into the fight!
To arms! To arms! To arms! Fire away!

And Raepfist cut a bloody swathe
and Conrad Raege had to laugh and scoff
Push on! Push on! Push on! Valiant men.

Bring up that flamer trooper! Hoorah! Hoorah!
Let's give 'em hell, and then die well!
In service to the Emprah!

Advance! Advance! They're no match for us trooper!
Advance! Advance! Ave Imperator!

OH I love to serve the Emprah! Hoorah! HOORAH!
On his holy land I'll take my stand-
To fight on for the Emprah!

Hoorah! Hoorah! Praise be to Holy Terra!
Hoorah! Hoorah! Praise the Immoooooooortal Emprah!

Trey Parker: Everyone Has Aids (Team America: World Police)

Everyone has WARP WARP! WARP! WARP! WARP WARP WARP WARP, WARP WARP! Everyone has WARP!

And so this is the end of our story And everyone is dead from WARP. It took from me my favorite son My only true Warmaster My conqueror of bright stars (He got WARPed)

Well I'm gonna march on Terra! Lead the Astartes and charge the brigades! There's a Daemon inside of all of us... I'll make them see, everyone has WARP.

My Commissar! (WARP!) My Astropath! (WARP!) My Chaplain and Librarian and Captain! (WARP! WARP! WARP!) The Xenos and witch, and the mutant and psyker!

Everyone has WARP! My techpriest and my squig Old Blue WARP! WARP! WARP! The Primarch's got it and so do you! WARP WARP WARP WARP, WARP WARP! Come on everybody we got purgin' to do! It's time to exterminate these worlds everyone has WARP! WARP! WARP! WARP! WARP! WARP! WARP! WARP! WARP! WARP! WARP! WARP! WARP! WARP! WARP! WARP! WARP! WARP! WARP! WARP! (WARP!)

Don McLean: American Pie

A long, long time ago...
I can still remember
How that cultist used to make me smile.

And I knew if I had my chance
That I could make those xenos dance
And, maybe, they’d be purged for a while.

But February made me shiver
With every bolt round I’d deliver. Heresy on the doorstep,
I couldn’t take one more step.

I can’t remember if I wrrryed
When I read about his lolcron bride,
But something touched me deep inside
The day the music died.

So die die, from the flames in the sky,
Drove my raider to the crater,
But the crater was dry.
And them good old dreads were drainin' the promethium dry
Singin’, "This’ll be the day that I die.
"This’ll be the day that I die."

Did you write the litanies of hate,
And do you live in the EMPRAH'S faith,
If the Codex tells you so?
Do you believe in rock ’n roll,
Can crack cocaine save your heretic soul,
And can you teach me how to wrrrry real slow?

Well, I know that you’re in love with him
`cause I saw you dancin’ in the gym.
You both kicked off your boots.
Man, I dig those rhythmic blues.

I was a lonely teenaged scout marine
With a camo cloak colored brown and green
I knew to see but not be seen
The day the music died.
I started singin’,

"Die die, from the flames in the sky."
Drove my raider to the crater,
But the crater was dry.
And them good old dreads were drainin' the promethium dry
Singin’, "This’ll be the day that I die.
"This’ll be the day that I die."

Now since M.30 we’ve been on our own
And heresy grows fat on a rollin’ stone,
But that’s not how it used to be.
When the harlequin sang with the noise marine,
In a coat he borrowed from James Dean
And a voice that came from you and me,

Oh, and while Lord Tzeentch was looking down,
A loota boy stole his JUST AS PLANNED crown.
The classroom was adjourned;
No grade report was returned.
And while Kharn raged about METAL BOX,
Macha tried to get some in the park,
And we rolled sixes in the dark
The day the music died.
We were singing,

"Die die, from the flames in the sky."
Drove my raider to the crater,
But the crater was dry.
And them good old dreads were drainin' the promethium dry
Singin’, "This’ll be the day that I die.
"This’ll be the day that I die."

Helter skelter in a summer swelter,
The birds flew off the Exterminatus shelter
Eight miles high and falling fast.
Nurgle-tan let loose a cloud of gas.
Macha still couldn't get no ass,
With old Failbaddon in a cast.

Now Cultist-chan wore cheap perfume
While Doomrider played a Slaaneshi tune.
We all got up to dance,
Oh, but we never got the chance!
The Angry Marines tried to take the field;
The Emperors Children refused to yield.
Do you recall what was revealed The day the music died?

We started singing,
"Die die, from the flames in the sky."
Drove my raider to the crater,
But the crater was dry.
Them good old dreads were drainin' the promethium dry
And singin’, "This’ll be the day that I die.
"This’ll be the day that I die."

Oh, and there we were all in one place,
All GRIMDARK and lost in space,
With no time left to start again.
So come on: Jack be nimble, Jack be quick!
Candlejack sat on a can-
Cause fire is the devil’s only friend.

Oh, and as I watched him on the stage
My hands were clenched in fists of rage.
No angel born in hell
Could break that daemon’s spell.
And as I purged her in the night
To show her the emperors shining light,
I saw Eldrad laughing with delight
The day the music died.

He was singing,
"Die die, from the flames in the sky."
Drove my raider to the crater,
But the crater was dry.
Them good old dreads were drainin' the promethium dry
And singin’, "This’ll be the day that I die.
"This’ll be the day that I die."

I met a farseer whose love did bloom
And I asked her for some happy news,
But she just smiled and turned away.
I went down to the wargear store
Where I’d heard the music years before,
But the techpriests said the music wouldn’t play.

Hand een thee stweets: thee childwen scweamed,
Thee lovers cwied, and thee poeets dweamed.
But not a hword hwas spoken;
Thee chyurch bells all were broken.
Hand thee thwee men Ay hadmire most:
Thee father, son, hand thee holy ghost,
They captyoored thee lhast train fooor thee coast
Thee day thee myoosick died.

And they were singing,

"Die die, from the flames in the sky."
Drove my raider to the crater,
But the crater was dry.
And them good old dreads were drainin' the promethium dry
Singin’, "This’ll be the day that I die.
"This’ll be the day that I die."

"Die die, from the flames in the sky."
Drove my raider to the crater,
But the crater was dry.
And them good old dreads were drainin' the promethium dry
Singin’, "This’ll be the day that I die.
"This’ll be the day that I die."

Theme from Mighty Morphin Power Rangers

[Immortal God-Emperor of Mankind]: "Inquisitor! Heretics, Xenos, and Mutants are abound! Recruit a team of Acolytes with attitude!"
[Inquisitor]: "Ayayayayay!"

They've got, a power and a faith that you've never seen before!
They've got, the ability to smite and to even up the score!
No Grot, can ever take them down! The Emprah lies on their side!
Go go Emprah's Rangers! Go go Emprah's Rangers! Go go Emprah's Rangers! The Mighty Inquisiting Emprah's Rangers!

They know, the fate of Holy Terra's lying in their hands!
They know, to always use their weapons at the first chance!
No Cult will ever take them down! The Emprah lies on their side!
Go go Emprah's Rangers! Go go Emprah's Rangers! Go go Emprah's Rangers! The Mighty Inquisiting Emprah's Rangers!

The Unclean, can never take them down! The Emprah lies on their side!
Go go Emprah's Rangers! Go go Emprah's Rangers! Go go Emprah's Rangers! The Mighty Inquisiting Emprah's Rangers!
Go go Emprah's Rangers!
Go go Emprah's Rangers!
Go go Emprah's Rangers!

"And the band played 'Fight on, the Navy'(And the Band Played 'Waltzing Matilda')"

When I was a young man I flew in a ship,
And lived the free life of a scouter.
From the Twin Star of Aphor to the Aquila Rift,
I danced my old scoutship all over.
Then in nought-oh-fifteen, the Emp-ror said "Son,
It's time time to stop scoutin', there's work to be done."
So they gave me a rank bar,
A Cruiser, a gun,
And they sent me away to the War.

And the band played 'Fight on, the Navy'
As we boarded the Santa Maree,
And amidst all the cheers,
the cannonade and tears,
we left for Bellerophon III.

How well I remember the sight I saw then,
the proud Navy cut down and shattered.
And how in the hell that they called Lagrange Ten,
We were butchered like poor bloody cattle.
Old Boney was ready, he'd primed himself well,
he cut us with Lances, and broke us with shell.
And in five minutes flat,
he had blown us to hell,
nearly blew me right back to Agrippa.

And the Vox played 'Fight on, the Navy',
as we formed up and counted the slain.
We'd lost half of ours,
for a handful of theirs,
but we charged right on back in again.

Now us that were left, well, we tried to survive,
in a mad world of lanceshot and boarders.
And for nine minutes ten I kept my boys alive,
as around me our numbers grew lesser.
Then a whole mess of guardsmen stormed onto the bridge,
they shot down old Kelley, the Nav and the Kid,
and for some bloody reason, they just let me live.
Never knew there were worse things than dying.

For I'll do no more dancing my scouter,
I thought as I ran for the pod,
for a scout can't feel dread,
he's got more balls than head,
and that's one thing a coward ain't got.

The handful of pods left I gathered to me,
and we left like a bolt from a barrel.
A dozen survivors of two-million-odd men,
the Grand Fleet of Admiral Karil.
And as we all dove into Catan's dock ring,
and the three from the Mada all started to sing,
the thought of my men,
had a horrible sting,
for not one had lived through the battle.

And the band played 'Fight on , the Navy',
for the wives of the men of Catan,
Nobody cheered,
they just saw us and stared,
and then, the crying began.

And now every march day I sit in the crowd,
and watch the young guardsmen walk on then.
I wonder to myself, not speaking aloud,
why there's not one vet'ran with them.
The young men march stiffly, all upright with pride,
they're all brave young soldiers with nothing to hide.
And then one kid asks,
"Is that how daddy died?"
And I don't have the courage to tell him.

And the band plays 'Fight on, the Navy',
As I answer my question before.
If the march they could give,
to the men who had lived,
not one man would dare march at all.

Dancin' my scouter, dancin' my scouter,
who'll come a-dancin' my scouter with me?
And their ghosts may be heard as you dance on by Bellerophon,
who'll come a-dancin' my scouter with me?

Gilbert and Sullivan: A British Tar

A Space Marine is a soaring soul,
Far greater than a mortal man,
His energetic fist should be ready to resist
Any heretical plan.
His nose should pant,
and his lip should curl,
His cheeks should flame,
and his brow should furl,
His bosom should heave,
and his hearts should glow,
And his fist be ever ready for a knock-down blow.

His nose should pant and his lip should curl,
His cheeks should flame and his brow should furl,
His bosom should heave and his hearts should glow,
And his fist be ever ready for a knock-down blow.

His eyes should flash with an inborn fire,
His brow with scorn be wrung;
He never should bow down to a filthy xenos frown,
Or the tang of a traitor tongue.

His foot should stamp,
and his throat should growl,
His sword should twirl,
and his face should scowl,
His eyes should flash like a conqueror
And he should ever bellow "for the Emperor!"

His foot should stamp, and his throat should growl,
His sword should twirl, and his face should scowl;
His eyes should flash like a conqueror,
And he should ever bellow "for the Emperor!", the Emperor, the Emperor, the Emperor!

Dio: Holy Diver

Holy Bolter
You've been out too long in the warzone
Oh it's jamming again

Ride the Tank
You can see its hull but you know it's clean.
Oh don't you see what I mean

Gotta shoot 'em down
Holy Bolter

Shiny Tracers
Like the eyes of a Daemon in the night
Something is coming for you

Race for the Dropship
You can hide in the sun of the Emperor's light
Oh we will pray it's all right

Gotta get away-get away
Between the armor lies
There's a trooper hard as steel
The valor never dies
War's a never ending wheel

Holy Bolter
You're the star of the battlefield
No need for full auto

Jump on the Tank you can feel its hull but you know it's mean
Some might can never be seen yeah
Holy Bolter
You've been out too long in the warzone
Oh it's jamming again

Ride the Tank
You can see armor but you know it's clean.

Gotta get away-get away Gotta get away-get away
Holy Bolter sole survivor your honour's clean

Holy Bolter Holy bolter never change the mag Holy Bolter
Oh Holy Bolter yeah alright get away get away get away

Holy Bolter Holy Bolter whoa Holy Bolter Hmmm Hmmm Hmmm Hmmm.

Will Smith: Fresh Prince of Bel-Air

Now, this is a story all about how
My life got flipped-turned upside down
And I'd like to take a minute
Just sit by my skull throne
I'll tell you how I became the daemon prince of Khorne

No idea where I was born or raised
On the gladiator arenas was where I spent most of my days
Beatin' smashing' killin' in the arenas
Escaped to the mountains with a few cronies
When a couple of soldiers
Who were up to no good
They found us and attacked my neighborhood
I got in one little fight and Emperor started to worry
And said 'You're movin' with your father and god in Terra'

It kinda hurt to see my pals fucked
But Emprah didn't let me go back
He gave me a battleship and then he gave me my legion.
I put my axe on and said, 'Gotta give my army a lesson'.

First company, yo this is bad
Marines drinking juice out of a champagne glass.
Is this what the marines of World Eaters are like?
Hmmmmm this won't be alright.

But wait I hear there're techmarine, apothecarians and all that
Put implants to the recruits like ones in this cool cat
Now I like it
Badass bloodthirsty soldiers
I don't give a fuck to Emprahs' warnings

Well, the battle-barge landed and when I came out
There was Horus who told he's gonna throw a rout
I was in and we went to Terra
We went totally ape
After an epic bloodshed I heard 'Horus got raped'

I whistled for a Battle-Barge and when it came near
My legion ran in, cursing the Emperor
Dumped Kharn to the trunk and fled the war
Khorne told me 'Yo homes to Eye of Terror'

I got wings on my back and horns on my head
This cool runesword and skin blood-red
I looked at my kingdom
I was finally there
To sit on my throne as the Daemon Prince of Khorne

Sabaton: Stalingrad

Fresh from orbit
From the dropships came to Comrades aid
City in despair
Almost crushed by Ghazkulls army

Oh its grimmer than hell
Ghazkull's forces advancing

The sound of the stubbers
The music of death
A grand symphony

See your friends fall
Hear them pray to the gods
Your emperor denies

Every man dies alone
And when your time comes
You will know that its time

Yarrick's fortress on fire
Is this madness or hell

The sound of the stubbers
The music of death
We're playing Chaos's symphony
Violins as lasguns
Conducted from hell

Oh Hades Hive
Morte Vedae

Are you praying
Do you follow the Commissars lead
No one knows you
No one cares but a single violin

Play the score of the dead
Know the daemon within

The sound of the stubbers
The music of death
We're playing Chaos's symphony
Violins as lasguns
Conducted from hell

Henry Clay Work: Marching Through Georgia

Bring the platoon standard, lads, we'll sing another song
Sing it with a spirit that will start this world along.
Sing it as we'll always sing it, quadrillions strong,
As we fight for the Emprah!

Hoorah! Hoorah! We march with his glory.
Hoorah! Hoorah! His light shall make you free.
So we'll carry his name from Agrip'naa to Delphi,
As we fight for the Emprah!

How the xenos howl when our flamers end all their fun,
How the cultists scream out when they march into our guns,
How the foe cries out for mercy when there will be none,
As we fight for the Emprah!

Hoorah! Hoorah! We march with his glory.
Hoorah! Hoorah! His light shall make you free.
So we'll carry his name from Agrip'naa to Delphi,
As we fight for the Emprah!

Yes, and there were heretics who wept with painful tears
having felt our noble will they had denied for years.
How the Inquisition now brings them justice so dear,
As we fight for the Emprah!

Hoorah! Hoorah! We march with his glory.
Hoorah! Hoorah! His light shall make you free.
So we'll carry his name from Agrip'naa to Delphi,
As we fight for the Emprah!

Your Imperium will die under my great onslaught!
So that Failbaddon said and that is what he thought,
But indeed we shall triumph for arms he has forgot,
As we fight for the Emprah!

Hoorah! Hoorah! We march with his glory.
Hoorah! Hoorah! His light shall make you free.
So we'll carry his name from Agrip'naa to Delphi,
As we fight for the Emprah!

So we fight at Creed's right hand and Cadia shall hold,
For the Emprah stands with us and all rebels shall fold,
And we can hide Titans behind barricades we're told,
As we fight for the Emprah!

Hoorah! Hoorah! We march with his glory.
Hoorah! Hoorah! His light shall make you free.
So we'll carry his name from Agrip'naa to Delphi,
As we fight for the Emprah!

Kelis: Milkshake

[Repeat x2]
My mechadendrites bring all the boys to the yard,
And they're like,
The best forge world's Mars!
Damn right the best forge world's Mars!
We can teach you,
'Bout St. Tesla's electric charge.

I know you want xenotech,
The thing that makes free energy,
What explorators go crazy for.
They lose their minds
If the warp unbinds
Before they get out in time.

[Chorus x2]
La la-la la la,
Warm it up.
La la-la la la,
AdMech toys are waiting.

My mechadendrites bring all the boys to the yard,
And they're like,
The best forge world's Mars!
Damn right the best forge world's Mars!
We can teach you,
'Bout St. Tesla's electric charge.

I can see the machine spirit.
You want to be just some skitarii?
Tech geeks and freaks with toys
That can't be bought.
Just know: heretics get caught.
Watch out if you're smart,

[Chorus x2]
La la-la la la,
Warm it up.
La la-la la la,
AdMech toys are waiting.

My mechadendrites bring all the boys to the yard,
And they're like,
The best forge world's Mars!
Damn right the best forge world's Mars!
We can teach you,
'Bout St. Tesla's electric charge.

Omnissiah says "get involved."
Enginseers practice every day so
You must maintain your firearm.
Same time maintain your iron halo
And you will learn to mend.
(Plus work on our titans!)
Then next honour spark plugs, the wheel and flint.
Then starting your car is a blessed event!

[Chorus x2] La la-la la la,
Warm it up.
La la-la la la,
AdMech toys are waiting.

My mechadendrites bring all the boys to the yard,
And they're like,
The best forge world's Mars!
Damn right the best forge world's Mars!
We can teach you,
'Bout St. Tesla's electric charge.

The Lonely Island: I'm On A Boat

I'm in a dread.
I'm in a dread.
Everybody start running
Cause I'm charging in a dread.
I'm in a dread.
I'm in a dread.
Take a good hard look
at the motherfucking dread.

I'm in a dread, motherfuckers, so you better run.
In a dread, blastin' you away with my giant gun.
Bustin' heretics, making 'em wish they were dead.
You can't stop me, motherfuckers 'cause I'm in a dread.

Take you shot, bitch,
I'm in a dread, witch.
And my adamantium armour's so thick.
I've got my giant fists
And my meltagun.
You were already dead before the war begun.

I'm riding in a drop pod
Falling to the ground
The drop pod's arriving,
Making a terrible sound.
But this ain't Slaanesh
This is the Emperor's hound,
An airborne dreadnought, motherfucking, coming inbound.

Fuck you, I'm in a dread, motherfuckers.
Fuck guns, I cheated death, motherfuckers.
I'm here with Chapter Master Seth, motherfuckers.
I can't even draw breath motherfuckers.

Oh, Emprah, if you could hear my roar,
As I'm waging your eternal war,
Covering the ground with xeno gore
Like Ursarkar Creed, anything is possible.

Never thought I'd be in a dread.
Blood staining my armor red.
Sanguinius, look at me.
Never thought I'd see the day,
I'd watch myself decay.
Believe me when I say
I fought in the Great Crusade.

I'm in a dread.
I'm in a dread.
Everybody start running,
'Cause I'm charging in a dread.
I'm in a dread.
I'm in a dread.
Take a good hard look
At the motherfucking dread.

Tom Jones: Delilah

I saw the gleam of the claw that she passed through my forces
I saw the flickering red fire of evil in her eyes
She was my demon
As she decieved me I watched and made plans for her demise

My my my Defiler
Why why why Defiler
I could see, that thing was no good for me
But I found the Warp had a craving for debris

At battle's end when my troops ran away I was waiting
I crossed the field to her spot and she writhed some more
She stood there laughing
I felt my Powerfist clench and she laughed no more

My my my Defiler
Why why why Defiler
So before they come to fuck up my base
Forgive me Defiler I just couldn't take any more
Forgive me Defiler I just couldn't take any more

Cage the Elephant: Ain't no Rest for the Wicked

I was walking through the Hive
When out the corner of my eye
I saw a filthy teenage girl approaching me.
She said sir can you spare a Throne
For a girl all alone
Perhaps I'd keep you company?
I looked into her eyes
And saw the sin of vice
I knew the Dark Gods held her in their sway
Offering Prayer to the Emperor,
I raised and aimed by Hecutor
And swiftly put a bullet in her head.

Oh, There ain't no rest for the Righteous,
Salvation doesn't come for free,
I got fiends to slay,
I got men to save,
I must strive to bring His Grace to me
I know I can't lose Faith,
I can't give in,
Though sometimes I fear I could,
Oh there ain't no rest for the Righteous,
Until we give our lives for Good.

As I continued through the hive
I go walking past a bar
When a man clad just in paint burst out the door
And then he looked at me and screamed
Swung an axe right at my neck,
I saw no reason or thought behind his eyes
I barely dodged the attack
And knew that I had to fight back
So I steeled myself and drew my gun to fight
I racked my boltgun with a click
And blew apart the heretic
And stood over his corpse right in the street.

Oh, There ain't no rest for the Righteous,
Salvation doesn't come for free,
I got fiends to slay,
I got men to save,
I must strive to bring His Grace to me
I know I can't lose Faith,
I can't give in,
Though sometimes I fear I could,
Oh there ain't no rest for the Righteous,
Until we give our lives for Good.

Now, much later in the day
I went to rest in my own hab,
And watched the pict-vid to find out the latest news
I was listening to reports
About rebellions all around
And felt a fire stirring deep inside my heart
There are enemies without
and there are enemies within,
It's up to us to defend our Imperium
So I urge all mankind to fight
For what we know deep down is right
The sacred glory of the God Emperor of Man!

Oh, There ain't no rest for the Righteous,
Salvation doesn't come for free,
We got fiends to slay,
We got men to save,
We must strive to each live Faithfully
Oh no
We can't give in,
We can't have doubt,
If we want to survive these times.
Oh there ain't no rest for the Righteous,
Until we give our lives for Good.

One night in Bangkok

[IMPERIAL]
Hive world, Imperial setting
And the hive don't know that the hive is getting
The creme de la creme of the regicide world in a
Show with everything but Ol' Cain

Time flies -- doesn't seem a minute
Since the Slaanesh spa had the regi boys in it
All change -- don't you know that when you
Play at this level there's no ordinary venue

It's Fenris -- or Gravalax -- or a Craftworld -- or -- or this place!

[CULTISTS]
One night in Bangkok and the warp's your oyster
The boys are temples and the girls are free
You'll find a god in every golden cloister
And if you're lucky then the god's a she (right now)
I can feel Slaaneshiis sliding up to me (Oh dear)

[IMPERIAL]
One world's very like another
When your head's down over your pieces, brother

[CULTISTS]
It's a drag, it's a bore, it's really such a pity
To be looking at the board, not looking at the city

[IMPERIAL]
Whaddya mean? Ya seen one crowded, polluted, stinking hive --

[CULTISTS]
Tea, tarts, warm, sweet
Some are set up in the Penthouse Plateau suite

[IMPERIAL]
Frag off! You're talking to a tourist
Whose every game's among the purest
I get my kicks with His blessing, Snotling!

[CULTISTS]
One night in Bangkok makes a Guardsman traitor
Not much between despair and heresy
One night in Bangkok and Inquisitors tumble
Can't be too careful with your company
I can feel a daemon walking next to me

[IMPERIAL]
Yarrick's gonna be the witness
To the ultimate test of cerebral fitness
This provides much more for us
Than a Waaaagh of Orks or a snarling Horus

Praise the Emprah' I'm only watching the game -- controlling it --

I don't see you guys rating
The kind of trap I'm contemplating
I'd let you watch, I would invite you
But the Sisters we use would not excite you

So you better go back to your bars, your temples, your Tarot parlours --

[CULTISTS]
One night in Bangkok and the warp's your oyster
The boys are temples and the girls are free
You'll find a god in every golden cloister
A lot of flesh, a little heresy
I can feel a cultist feeling up on me

One night in Bangkok makes a Guardsman traitor
Not much between despair and heresy
One night in Bangkok and the Seraphim tumble
Can't be too careful with your company
I can feel Eth'reals floating next to me...

Heather Alexander: March of Cambreadth

Lasgun's flash, chainswords swing,
Bolter's armour-piercing sting,
Warhounds run, flickering void-shields,
Fight Those Heretics till They Yield
Baneblade catterpillars groan,
Fight to Keep this World Your Own
Sound the vox and call the cry,
How Many of Them Can We Make Die!

Follow orders as you're told,
Make Their Daemon Blood Run Cold
Fight until you die or drop,
A Force Like Ours is Hard to Stop
Close your mind to stress and pain,
Fight till You're No Longer Sane
Let not one cultist pass by,
How Many of Them Can We Make Die!

Guard your women and children well,
Send These Bastards Back to Hell
We'll teach them the ways of war,
They Won't Come Here Any More
Use your gun and use your head,
Fight till Every One is Dead
Raise the flag up to the sky,
How Many of Them Can We Make Die!

Dawn has broke, the time has come,
Move Your Feet to a Marching Drum
We'll win the war and pay the toll,
We'll Fight as One in Heart and Soul
Baneblade catterpillars groan,
Fight to Keep this World Your Own
Sound the vox and call the cry,
How Many of Them Can We Make Die!

(Repeat verse 1)

Rutland Weekend Television: Football

[Commissar]
I blow brains out for the Emperor
[Blood Angel]
For the Chapter, I burn Orks
[Harlequin]
I dismember for The Laughing God
[Warboss]
Oi killz fer Gork an' Mork!

[Inquisitor]
I drop planet-killing bombs on the unclean from up above!
[All]
Yes 40k's the game that we all love!

[Plague Marine]
I spread STDs for Nurgle
[Noise Marine]
And I do it for Slaanesh
[Rubric Marine]
For Tzeench I scatter entrails
[Berzerker]
For Khorne, I'll eat your flesh!

[Chaos Marine]
I wish they'd bring back Malal, 'cause those other four are bores
[All]
Yes, 40k's the game that we adore!

[All]
We love Warhammer!
[Marines]
Cleanse! Purge! Kill!
[Cultist]
Aaah!

[All]
We love Warhammer!
[Chaos Marines]
Maim! Kill! Burn!
[Guardsman]
Ow!

[All]
40k's the game that we adore!

[Dark Eldar Wych]
I loot and rape for pleasure
[Fire Warrior]
I kill for The Greater Good
[Necron Pariah]
I skin people for the Star Gods and then bathe in their blood

[All]
'Cause in the grimdark future there is dick-all else but war
[All]
Yes, 40k's the game that we adore!

[All]
We love Warhammer!
[Necrons]
Move! Shoot! Move!
[Orks]
WAAAUGH!

[All]
We love Warhammer!
[Nids]
Om! Nom! Nom!
[Penitent Engine]
Ohhh!

[All]
40k's the game that we adore!
The End!

Men of Harlech

Men of Tanith, stop your dreaming,
Can't you see their lasguns gleaming,
Or their ruinous banners streaming,
On this battlefield?

Men of Tanith, stand ye steady!
It shall not be ever said the
Ghosts for battle were not ready.
On you, Tanith men!

From our worlds rebounding,
Let this war cry sounding,
Summon all at Emp'ror's call
The mighty force surrounding!

Oh, men of Tanith, on to glory!
This shall ever be your story
Keep these burning words before ye,
Gaunt's Ghosts shall not yield!

Tongues of las from nalwood flaring,
News of traitors' deaths declaring,
To heroic deeds of daring
call you Tanith men!

Groans of wounded Guardsmen dying,
Wails of wives and children flying,
for the Emp'ror's succor crying
Hear you not their plight?

Shall those voices wailing,
Now be unavailing,
You to rouse who never yet
the Emperor's realm were failing?

This our answer, crowds down pouring
Swift as a bolter's wrath comes roaring
Not in vain, His voice imploring,
calls on Tanith men.

Now to battle we are going,
Every heart with courage glowing,
Pride and passion overflowing
In the glorious strife.

Lo! the din of war enrages,
Vengeance crowns the hate of ages,
Sternly Tanith now engages
the doomed Heretics!

Hear the old pipes playing,
And the soldiers slaying,
Hot the strife while Tanith men
Are lives of traitors claiming.

Lasbolts fly as swift as lightning,
Shout on shout the tumult height'ning,
Aquila's gold wing is bright'ning,
In the Emperor's name!

Loud the Tanith pipes are sounding,
Every guardsman's heart is pounding,
As the trusted Gaunt surrounding,
March you, Tanith men!

Short the sleep the foes is taking,
Ere the morrow's morn is breaking,
They shall have a rude awakening,
Wrought by Tanith men.

With their lasguns flashing,
And Straight Silvers slashing,
Through the traitors' serried ranks
The Tanith men are dashing

Now the heretics are flying,
Trampling on the dead and dying;
Victory aloft is crying,
"Gaunt's Ghosts win the field!"

Manowar: Dawn of Battle

Dreadful Thunder The storms moving in And Judgment day is calling! My soul has been stolen By my ascension as Khorne's Chosen! And the sound of glory !

I will send into the ground All that are found By the sign of Warmaker falling! The Loyalists will fall I will strike down them all Then you will know my calling

The Blood God calls my name In the sound of the wind in the night My sword will drink blood! And I will fight Yes I will fight In the dawn of battle Dawn of battle

I will rise up to Khorne's Call! I will rise up from the grave A brother of Angron A master to the slaves

I am the soul Chosen Of the Khorne's Fire and His Rage I was wrought upon this galaxy Born to rule and battle wage

By the total decimation Of the Imperium at my command! By the Axe! By the Sword! By Fire! By my hand!

I give no explanation! I was branded by Khorne's Will To bring death and destruction To all that I now kill

The Blood God calls my name In the sound of the wind in the night My sword will drink blood And I will fight Yes I will fight In the dawn of battle Dawn of Battle

I long to slay So I wait for a sign I wait for the Hordes To charge from the Eye From the dusts of carnage A promise to keep Then all who see shall believe Deliver into my hand The sword that is His Right Hand Let my journey begin So all shall understand That if I fall I will live again

I will rise up to Chaos' Call I will rise up from the grave A brother to the Angron A master to the slaves

I give no explanation I was branded by Khorne's Will To bring Death and Destruction To all that I now kill

The Blood God calls my name In the sound of the wind in the night My sword will drink blood And I will fight Yes I will fight In the dawn of battle

Antoine Dodson and the Gregory Brothers: Bed Intruder

Chorus:
[Town Crier]
He’s landin' on your planets
He’s snatchin blasphemers up
Gonna purge em so y’all need to
Hide your kids, Hide your wife
Hide your kids, Hide your wife
Hide your kids, Hide your wife
And hide your husband
Cuz they purgin' errbody out here

You don’t have to come and confess,
They lookin' for you
They gon' find you
They gon' find you

So you can run and tell that,
Run and tell that
Run and tell that, heretic
Her- her- heretic

[Acolyte]
We got your DNA
You done left fingerprints and all
You are so dumb
You are really dumb–for real.

You are really, really, really, really, so dumb.

[Witness]
I was attacked by some heretic in the hab-stacks.

[Acolytes]
So dumb, So dumb, So dumb, So

Chorus

[Inquisitor Lord's Report]
'bout 5'9', 5'10'
Pallid complexion, bald cut like Astartes
With some little runes on his head
Clean cut, very gaunt face

Sent in my Sisters, when they walked in,
He had his hands around a tome.
First thing was to grant emperor's mercy,
And that's what they did.
Sororitas: ('ey!)

Chorus

[Inquisitor Lord]
Well, obviously we have a cultist in Lincoln Park

[Battle-Sister]
Are you serious, My Lord?

We got your dagger
We got your scent
I know what shoe size you wear, my boy
So you can run and hide
But we're gonna find you
Find you

Chorus x2

Ozzy: Crazy train

Black Rage, but that's how it goes
Millions of traitors living as foes
Pretty sure it is too late
To learn how to love
And forget how to hate

Mortal wounds are healing
Life's a bitter shame
Im getting an extra save with my Feel No Pain
Im getting an extra save with my Feel No Pain

Let's Go!

I listen to chaplains
To get rerolls
I fight against Bloodthirst
Got my own set of rules
One person conditioned to keep some control
And Astorath lets me live just for the lulz

Mental wounds still screaming
Driving me insane
I'm fighting against Horus crazy brain
I'm im kicking Horus' ass in my crazy brain

I know that things are pretty wrong with me
You gotta listen to my RAGE
FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU...

Death company Chaplain
That's what we've become
Inheriting troubles I'm mentally numb
Crazy, I just cannot bear
I'm living with something' that just isn't fair

Had a wound inflicted
Anyone to blame
I'm going off the rails with my unbound rage
I'm going off the rails with my unbound rage

SSgt Barry Sadler: Ballade Of The Space Marines.

Fighting soldiers from the sky
Fearless men who jump and die
Men who haunt the Xenos' dreams
The brave men of the Space Marines

Golden wings upon their chests
More than men, the Imperium's best
Today we test one hundred teens
But only one joins the Space Marines

Altered to live off any land
Trained in combat, hand to hand
Never to hide their colours' sheen
They wear them proud for the Space Marines

Golden wings upon their chests
More than men, the Imperium's best
Today we test one hundred teens
But only one joins the Space Marines

When at last, he is released
One more Marine finds The Emperor's Peace
He has died for those oppressed
Leaving his Chapter one request

Cut the geneseed from my chest
To live again in the Imperium's best
One more young man to guard the hopes and dreams
Of all Mankind as a Space Marine

When You're Eldrad

When Asuryan is too busy, and Khaine's a bit too much
They call me, by name you see, for my special touch
To the seers I'm a legend, to the mon'keigh I'm a dick
But call me by any name, any way it's all the same

I'm the gore on your shoe
I'm the pebble in your boot
I'm the daemon in your bed
I'm the bolt in every head

I'm the mine on which you step
I'm the pin in every hip
I'm the spore in your eye, makes you wiggle and writhe

And it's so easy when you're Eldrad
This is the life you see, the council tip their hats to me
I do it all because I'm Eldrad
And I do it all for free
Your rage is all the pay I'll ever need

While there's mon'keigh to make sad
While there's lulz left to be had
While there's pockets left to pick
While there's Dreadnoughts left to trip
down the stairs I'll be there, I'll be waiting 'round the corner
It's a game, I'm glad I'm in it
'Cause there's one born every minute

And it's so easy when you're Eldrad
This is the life you see, the council tip their hats to me
I do it all because I'm Eldrad
And I do it all for free
Your rage is all the pay I'll ever need

I pledge my allegiance
To all things skub and derp
Promise on my old Soul Stone
To do as I am told
For Cegorach has never seen
A seer quite like me, not only
does his job but does it happily

I'm the fear that keeps you 'wake
I'm the shadows in the Warp
I'm the Daemons they become
I'm the nightmare in your skull

I'm a Witchblade in your back
An extra turn upon the rack
I'm the quivering of your heart
A stabbing pain, a sudden start

And it's so easy when you're Eldrad
This is the life you see, the council tip their hats to me
I do it all because I'm Eldrad
And I do it all for free
Your rage is all the pay I'll ever need

And I do it all for free
Your rage is all the pay I'll ever need X2

It gets so ronery being Eldrad
What I'd do to see a Codex
Even for a little while
And no one loves you when you're Eldrad

I'm lying through my teeth
Your rage is all the comforting I need!

Weebl: Cucumber song (Spire Legis)

We is takin' a truk
Down to Spire Legis
Cuz we 'ave 'ears they is all 'ummie free
Which makes it safe fer us ta plant new orkses
All fer teh WAAAGH
Just ya sees

'Ummies are the orkses enemies
They try an' stomp us with their bitz
The only way few our boyz ta escape is
Drivin' a truk down the street!

Secret of Survival (The Wind In The Willows)

[All Four]
First you see us…
[Tzeentch]
Then you don’t…
(All four disappear)
[Khorne]
Now you hear us….
[Nurgle]
Now you won’t…
[All four (reappearing behind Traveler’s back)]
It’s our secret of survival
In a very nasty Warp.
[Slaanesh]
Now you feel us…
[Khorne]
Now you can't.
[Nurgle]
Are we real?
[Tzeentch]
Perhaps we aren't!
[All Four]
It's our secret of survival
In a very nasty Warp!
It's our secret of survival
In a very nasty Warp!
[Traveler]
Is it really such a nasty place?
[Voice of Malal]
Oh yes, a very nasty place indeed
[All Four:]
Nastier than you could ever dream of!
[Tzeentch]
From up above…
[Nurgle]
And from beneath…
[Slaanesh]
Daemons…
[Khorne]
Armed to teeth.
[All Four]
Ready to attack you,
You're a snack - and you'd better run!
[Khorne]
Don't come to Innmaterium
If you haven't got a gun!
[All four]
Hahahahahaha!
[Tzeentch]
Every creature of the Chaos
Has to look out for itself!
[Slaanesh]
Got no Emperor here, or Space Marines
You could call for help
[Nurgle]
You're in the Warp boy
And every child could
Tell you that you've got no
Business to be here!
[All Four]
Oooooooooooooooooooooh!
[Slaanesh]
First you see us…
[Tzeentch]
Then you don’t…
[Nurgle]
Now you hear us…
[Khorne]
Now you won't.
[All Four]
It's our secret of survival
In a very nasty Warp!
[Slaanesh]
Now you feel us…
[Nurgle]
Now you can't…
[Khorne]
Are we real?
[Tzeentch]
Perhaps we aren't!
[All Four:]
It's our secret of survival
It’s our secret of survival
It's our secret of survival
In a very nasty Warp!

Sabaton- Panzer Battalion

Out of the warp no Daemos we fear
Piercing the void as we charge
An armoured battlecruiser on course to the expanse
Closing the end of it's march

This time we're here to finish a job
Started a millenia ago
Driving the heretics out of their holes
To bury them with promethium

Armoured guns of mass destruction
Killers in the expanse
Rats who dares to stand before us
Feel our lance go live

[Chorus:] Death in the shape of a Lunar battlecruiser
Insolent xenos don't run face your fate you are dead
cannot outrun our Lunar battlecruiser

Millions of tons of armour and guns
Making it's way through the expanse
Our Lunar battlecruiser is back for revenge
Artillery sweeping the land

First strike is ours no mercy is shown
There's rivers of blood in our track
Breaking their waves of defence with our guns
Emperor watching our back

Blow their void shield clear for deep strike
Ready for the storm
Minefields swept there's no surrender
Feel our lances burn

[Chorus x2]

Out of the warp no Daemos we fear
Piercing the void as we charge
An armoured battlecruiser on course to the expanse
Has reached the end of it's march

Armoured guns of mass destruction
Killers in the expanse
Rats who dares to stand before us
Feel our lance go live

Lunar battlecruiser
Insolent xenos don't run face your fate you are dead
Lunar battlecruiser

Hallelujah

Written by yours truly.

I heard there was a secret word,
that Goto wrote and it pleased the Board,
but you don't care for canon, do you?
It goes like this, the fourth, the fifth,
Horus' fall, the Angel's lift,
Boreale was shouting "Hail the Emprah"
Hail the Emprah, Hail the Emprah,
Hail the Emprah, Hail the Emprah...

Khorne made you strong, but you were don goof',
when Eversor bursted through the roof,
he shouted WRYYYYYYYYYY right before he killed ya.
He murdered all your buddies there,
cut off your limbs, ripped out your hair
And from your lips came the "Death to Emprah"
Death to Emprah, Death to Emprah,
Death to Emprah, Death to Emprah...

Heretic I have seen before,
in a bio-ship I walked the floor,
walls came alive and all tried to kill ya.
Creed's flag appeared on battleships,
infiltrated tanks blew them to bits,
through darkest space was shouted "Screw the Emprah!"
Screw the Emprah, Screw the Emprah,
Screw the Emprah, Screw the Emprah...

There was a time, t'was a good show,
when Eldar appeared by row,
And Eldrad screwed us over big time.
The Necrons from the darkest depths,
send entire regiments to their deaths,
the Guardsmen were all shouting "Where's the Emprah?!"
Where's the Emprah, Where's the Emprah,
Where's the Emprah, Where's the Emprah...

Well on the distant Terra,
sits our beloved Emprah,
guiding his children through these dark times.
Gods of Chaos, beasts from beyond,
monsters by the ancients spawned,
we raise our fist and shout "AVE EMPRAH!"
AVE EMPRAH, AVE EMPRAH,
AVE EMPRAH, AVE EMPRAH!

Where there's a whip, there's a way (The Lord Of The Rings)

Wher ther’z Gork
Ther’z Mork
And Wher ther’z Mork
Ther’z Gork
Wher ther’z Gork
We wanntz go to WAAAGH todayz
Umiess don’t run, fight uz, heyz, heyz, heyz
Ther will be WAAAGH all dayz, all dayz, all dayz!
Ther’z Mork
And Wher ther’z Mork, ther’z Gork!
Wher ther’z Gork
Ther’z Mork
And Wher ther’z Mork
Ther’z Gork
Wher ther’z Gork
Ther’z Mork
Letz WAAAAGH! Letz WAAAGH!
And wher ther’z Mork, ther’z Gork
Get in da choppa, cuz werz gonna fight!
There will be WAAAGH all dayz and nightz and mooar
Cuz thiz iz what the Orkz livez foooor!
Letz WAAAGH! Letz WAAAGH!
Wher ther’z Gork
Ther’z Mork
And wher ther’z Mork
Ther’z Gork
Wher ther’z Gork
We wanntz go to WAAAGH todayz
Umiess don’t run, fight uz, hey, hey, hey
Ther will be WAAAGH all dayz, all dayz, all dayz!
Ther’z Mork
And Where ther’z Mork, ther’z Gork!
Letz WAAAGH! Letz WAAAGH!
Letz WAAAGH! Letz WAAAGH!

I'm a good ol' heretic

Oh, I'm a good ol' heretic
Yeah, that's just what I am
And for your rotting corpse-god I do not give a damn
I'm glad I fought for Horus, I only wish we'd won
And I don't want no pardon for anything I've done

I hates the damn Imperium, those spergin' Cogboys, too
I hates those preening braggarts in uniforms of blue
I hates the nasty Aquila, with all its brags and fuss
And those lyin', thievin' Magpies lead by some coiffured wuss

I hates the Administratum and everything they do
I hates the Inquisition, their fucking Grey Knights, too
I hates those fool Astartes, I hates the Golden Throne
I hates the Ecclesiarchy praying to worthless bones

I fought with the Warmaster for ten score years and some
I caught some bolter fire, got an augmetic thumb
I lost more bits to frostbite, a campin' in the snow
But I killed a bunch of Loyalists, I'd love to kill some mo'

Now forty thousand Loyalists are dead in Istvaan dust
We got some more on Terra, before they killed Horus
They died to Chaos bolters, lasguns and plasma shots
Wish we'd killed forty billion, instead of what we got

We couldn't conquer Terra, but someday it'll burn
Inside the Eye of Terror we're planning our return
So I don't need no pardon for the way that I was made
Nor for the things I'll do to you in our next Black Crusade

Oh I'm a good ol' heretic, now that's just what I am
Yeah, I'm a good ol' heretic, now that's just what I am

Sailor Moon: Sayla Ork

Foightin' evil boi moonlite

Winnin' lurv boi daylite

Nevah runnin' from a real foight

'e iz sa un named Salya Mork (or iz it Gork?)

'e will... Neva turn 'is back onna boy

'e iz... Always dere ta destroy

'e iz... Da un on 'oo we can depend

'he iz da un named Sayla...

...Sayla Choppa

...Sayla Dakka

...Sayla Foightin'

...Sayla Winnin'

Wiff sekrit powahs

All so noo ta 'im

'e iz da un named Sayla Mork (or is it Gork?)

Foightin' evil boi moonlite

Winnin' lurv boi daylite

Wiff 'iz Sayla Boyz to 'elp foight

'e iz da un named Sayla Mork (or is it Gork?)

'e iz da un named Sayla Mork (or is it Gork?)

'e iz da un... Sayla ORK!

Electric Light Orchestra - Mr Blue Sky

Warp storm shattered from the sky
There ain't a witch in sight
It's steel rehnin, Spess Mareens are on the way
And don't you know
It's a beautiful new day hey, hey

Runnin' down the avenue
See how his hair shines brightly, in the hive
On the streets, where crime was rife
The Emperah is living here today hey, hey

Emperah guy, please tell us why
You had to die away for so long
Where did we go wrong?

Emperah guy, please tell us why
You had to die away for so long
Where did we go wrong?

Hey you with the godly face
Welcome to your loyal race
A celebration, The Emperah's up there waitin'
And today is the day we've waited for

Emperah guy, please tell us why
You had to die away for so long
Where did we go wrong?

Hey there Emperah
We're so pleased to be with ya
Look around see what you do
Ev'rybody smiles at you

Hey there Emperah
We're so pleased to be with ya
Look around see what you do
Ev'rybody smiles at you

Emperah guy, Emperah guy
Emperah guy

Emperah, you did it right
But here comes a khornate knight creepin' over
Now his hand is on your shoulder
Never mind I'll remember you this
I'll remember you this way

Emperah guy please tell us why
You had to die away for so long
Where did we go wrong?

Hey there Emperah
We're so pleased to be with ya
Look around see what you do
Ev'rybody smiles at you
Ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba
Ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba

Monty Python: Lumberjack Song

[Tech Priest]

I wanted to be... a Space Marine!
Killing so many different xenos, as they war against planets all across the Imperium. The undying Immortals. The Nobs. The Wraiths! The formidable Farseer! The constantly screaming Warboss! The plucky little Slugga Boyz! The lumbering Kroot hounds of the Tau. The towering Big Meks of the Orks! The gargantuan Mega Armoured Nobs!

With my squad mates by my side, we'd purge! purge! purge!

[Tech Priest]

I'm a Space Marine, and I'm okay.
I purge all night and I burn all day.

[Space Marine Squad]

He's a Space Marine, and he's okay.
He purges all night and he burns all day.

[Tech Priest]

I burn the Orks. I shoot the Tau.
I use chainswords for Eldar.
On Wednesdays I hunt Necron,
And praise Khorne in my battles!

[Space Marine Squad]

He burns the Orks. He shoots the Tau.
He uses chanswords on Eldar.
On Wednesdays he hunts Necron,
And praises Khone in battle...?
He's a Space Marine, and he's okay.
He purges all night and he burns all day.

[Tech Priest]

I burn the Orks. I praise Chaos.
I like to rape and maim.
I put on chaos symbols
And praise heretic gods.

[Space Marine Squad]

He burns the Orks. He praises Chaos.
He likes to rape and maim.
He puts on chaos symbols
And praises heretic gods?!
He's a Space Marine, and he's okay.
He purges all night and he burns all day.

[Tech Priest]

I burn the Orks. I wear warp blades,
talismans, and a mark.
I wish I'd been a daemon,
Just like my dear Papa.

[Space Marine Squad]

He burns the Orks. He wears warp blades,
talismans, and a mark?!

[Inquisitor]

What's this? Wants to be a daemon?! Oh, My!
And I thought you were so loyal! Traitor!

Avenue Q: The internet is for Porn.

Sung by Kharn and a Cannoness

The Imperium is really really great
For Khorne!
I’ve got a fast starship so i don’t have to wait
For Khorne!
There's always some new fight,
For Khorne!
I war all day and night
For Khorne!
It's like i’m killing at the speed of light
For Khorne!

The Imperium is for Khorne
The Imperium is for Khorne,
Why you think the Warp was born?
Khorne, Khorne, Khorne!

I’m glad that we have Warp technology
For Khorne!
Which gives us untold opportunity
For Khorne!
Fight from your tabletop
For Khorne!
You can plunder rape and chop
For Khorne!
Until you've had enough and you're ready to stop
For Khorne!

The Imperium is for Khorne
The Imperium is for Khorne,
Me up all night gathering skulls for Khorne, Khorne, Khorne!

[SPOKEN]

[Canoness] That’s gross! You’re a heretic

[Kharn]
Ah, sticks and stones Cannoness

[Canoness]
NO really, you're a heretic Normal people don’t run around killing in the Imperium

[Kharn]
Ohhhh?

[Canoness]
What?!

[Kharne]
You have no idea Ready normal people?

[Abbadon, Horus, Angron]
Ready

Let me hear it!

[Kharn and guys]

The Imperium is for Khorne!
[Abbadon]

Sorry Emp

[Kharn and guys]

The Imperium is for Khorne!

[Horus]

I eviscerate!
[Kharn and guys]

All these guys unshethe their swords
For Khorne, Khorne, Khorne!

[Cannoness]

The Imperium is not for Khorne!!

[Kharn and guys]
Khorne, Khorne, K---

[Cannoness]

HOLD ON A SECOND!
Now I happen to know for a fact that you, Abbadon, rely on the Imperium to kill off your excess followers

[Abbadon]

That’s correct.

[Cannoness]

And Horus, you once saved the Emperor's life

[Horus]

Sure!

[Cannoness]

And Angron, you keep killing whenever you can

[Angron]

Yes I do!

[Cannoness]

And Kharn, you love kitten

[Kharne]

True!

[Kharne]

Oh, but Cannoness
What you think we do after? hmm?

[Abbadon]
...yeah

(EEEWWWWW!)
The Imperium is for Khorne!
Heretics!
The Imperium is for Khorne!
I hate Khorne
Grab your axe and cleave and hack
For Khorne, Khorne, Khorne!
(harmonizing) Khorne, Khorne, Khorne, Khorne
I’m leaving!
Khorne Khorne Khorne Khorne
Khorne Khorne Khorne Khorne
I hate the Imperium!
Khorne, Khorne, Khorne, Khorne

The Imperium is for
The Imperium is for
The Imperium is for Khorne!

YEAH!

See Also

• RIDIN ON A TRUKK, an Orky version of "On A Boat"

• Little Boxes, using the tune of the song of the same name, singing about METAL BOXES.

External Links

• Video of Pocahontas: Savages
• Video of The Prince of Egypt: Playing with the Big Boys
• Video of The Prince of Egypt: The Plagues
• Video of the Lion King: Be Prepared
• Video of Queen: Bohemian Rhapsody
• Video of Robert Browning's poem My Last Duchess
• Video of Ozzy performing Hellraiser
• Video of Nancy Sinatra: These Boots Were Made for Walking
• Video of My Chemical Romance: The Black Parade
• Video of Iron Maiden: The Trooper
• Video of Harvey Andrews: British Soldier
• Video of Will Smith: Men in Black
• Video of Sabaton: Wolfpack
• Not a Video of A Soldier's Christmas
• Video of Dixie
• Video of Everyone Has Aids
• Video of A British Tar
• Video of Fresh Prince of Bel-Air
• Video of Ain't no rest for the Wicked
• March of Cambreadth
• Video of RWT's Football
• Video of Bed Intruder
• When You're Evil

---

• suptg archive thread for the grimdark songwriting