Khorne: Difference between revisions

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BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD; SKULLS FOR THE SKULL THRONE

Chaos god of violence, hate and rage. He is also the world's biggest cornflake producer and likes to have BLOOD with them! He used to be about war in all its aspects, including martial honor (which some neckbeards still cling to), back in the days when power was gained by hacking off people's heads with an axe and/or blasting them with a massive gun. Then Gav Thorpe went and assraped the Chaos codex. Now he's just a loony who likes killing everything, though it has been said that he sends his bloodhounds after anyone who harms the innocent. Kharn is Khorne's champion, and despite everything he's pretty fun to be around. His followers are often characterized by a two dimensional love of tearing shit up and being overcome with blood lust.

Khorne loathes Slaanesh, as Slaanesh is about living it up, while Khorne is about TEARING IT THE FUCK DOWN. Evidence supports Khorne being Tsundere for Slaanesh, as once the Lord of Excess gave the Blood god a cup, and ever since he has EXPLODED IT WITH HATE only to pick it back up and try and put it back together. WHEN I HAVE REMOVED THE WRITER'S EMPTY HEAD FROM HIS SHOULDERS, KHORNE WILL SUBJECT HIM TO UNPARALLELED SUFFERING FOR HIS BLASPHEMY!!!

Khorne was said to have originated during the Crusades, however since hyoomanz aren't the only things that are sentient, there is some speculation as to the truth of this (the war in heaven makes more sense). Actually during the Crusades the Eldar were pretty much fighting the Necrons too, so Khorne's birth isn't too illogical.

KHORNE CARES NOT FROM WHENCE THE BLOOD FLOWS, ONLY THAT IT FLOWS!

HERE'S A PICTURE OF HIM in Warhammer Fantasy Yes, I know, you probably enjoyed your own prior conception.

AND ANOTHER ONE! [1]

Fun Khorne facts!

8. His tongues of Chaos name is Kharneth, and I suppose it still is.

8. Khorne is gay for Billy Mays (He needs the OxyClean to clean up all the blood!)

8. In truth, the Angry Marines are about as Khornate as Khorne flakes. LIEZ! They eat it every day! Which is why they were Exterminatus'd for being Heretics.

8. Khorne wields a Greatsword instead of an axe, and wears black armor.

8. Wears rings on his hands made from the skulls of usurper war gods.

8. Khorne is the strongest Chaos God, and also the first to become sentient (although Nurgle is the oldest).

8. Khorne does it for the lulz.

8. His sacred number is eight.

8. The Internet is for Khorne. This page is proof.

8. Khorne invented the first tool of hitting stuff to allow humans to contribute to his throne, which at the time was known as the Skull Chair.

8. It is a well known fact that the two Bush people worshiped Khorne, as did JFK.

8. Liberal hippy-dippy peaceniks want you to believe all conservatives are cultists of Khorne.

8. He farted 5 miles under haiti. I think we all know what happened next.

8. Khorne's favorite music is DEATH METAL!!!

8. Khorne is Best Buddies with Nurgle

8. Khorne did WTC, and is therefore, a Jew.

8. Contrary to popular belief, all Khornate Berzerkers and Khorne himself are all Accountants. Which is why they're all so angry, because they regret taking that subject.

7. Khorne likes Nurgle because of his cooking and are often seen working together at the annual Warp Cook-off, this is because Nurgle is the only Chaos God that cooks nice shit.. Even if what he cooks has bits of his own intestine mixed in.

8. Khorne beat the Emprah in an arm wrestling match.

Valkia

In Warhammer Fantasy, Khorne has a personal sex slave called Valkia the Bloody. Valkia and Khorne's sickfuckery begins when the aforementioned ugly bitch somehow managed to 'defeat' a greater daemon and tried to deliver it's head to Khorne. Because whatever steroids she used to cheat during that fight wore off, she died in the Realm of Chaos. Khorne, needing some evidence to prove that he wasn't gay, (given his preference for massive, hairy, muscular old men in heavy armor as his champions and his brief yet lustful affair With Billy Mays) took the bitch as his personal BDSM sex slave. The rest, as they say, is history.

Gallery

This page is needs images. Help plz.

Khorne's followers off the battlefield.
Waffels for the blood god!
Khorne's trainers prefer violent pokémon.
Khorne cultist
Would have been a somewhat adequate picture, had they taken the right photographs of the actual Berzerkers. lulz.
Mark of Khorne
Cultist-Chan, being a Jew.

The Chaos Gods of Warhammer 40,000 and Warhammer Fantasy
Four Main Chaos Gods:	Khorne - Nurgle - Slaanesh - Tzeentch
Other Gods of Chaos:	Archaon - Hashut - Horned Rat - Nuffle Malal - Morghur - Necoho - Zuvassin
Chaos Gods of Law:	Alluminas - Arianka - Solkan the Avenger

@@ Line 57: / Line 57: @@
 . Khorne likes Nurgle because of his cooking and are often seen working together at the annual Warp Cook-off, this is because Nurgle is the only Chaos God that cooks nice shit..  Even if what he cooks has bits of his own intestine mixed in.
-. Khorne beat the Emprah in an arm wrestling match.''' BULLFUCKINGSHIT!'''
+. Khorne beat the Emprah in an arm wrestling match.
 ==See Also==