Tales of Fail

This is a page for the posting of tales of epic and might fail

When terminator armour fails

Have your terminators ever died to termagants? Mine have. I deep striked my squad next to a squad of 15 gaunts and immediately opened up with their storm bolters and assault cannon, managing to cause 6 casualties. On my friends turn he fired his gaunts devourers failing to cause any casualties and being new he decided to charge. At this point I was smiling confidently. My power sword wielding sergeant attacked missing one attack then failing to wound with the second, I was annoyed at this but was not worried. My friend managed to cause 4 unsaved wounds but due my squad being terminators I wasn't worried AND THATS WHEN I ROLLED FOUR ONES. My last terminator managed to miss all his attacks and then was wiped out by gaunts in the next turn. Needless to say RAGE

Cuz they were made for fightin' an' winnin'

Some day you just know Dice gods hate you. It was my first 6E game, CSM vs Orks. I managed to score the objective on turn 6 with my 3-man Obliterator squad which happen to be scoring due to mission type, and it was the objective that could win me the game (without it it would be a draw). And then his three surviving tankbustas fire their rokkits on my oblits. I was kind of amused when all three hit despite their awful BS2, but was not worried - it was only AP3 anyway. Unsurprisingly all three wound, but that to be expected with S8 against T4. And then I rolled three ones on the saves. We both broke into mad laughter because of how ridiculous that was. Not only that cost me an objective, but he also get one VP for killing my HS unit due to Big Guns mission. It's 1/5832 chance that shit could happen.

A Bad Day At the Khorne Building

There's a difference between dice hating you and dice wanting to let you know that they're perfectly capable of sodomy. During one battle playing as Tau, a friend playing CSM rushed a squad of Fire Warriors with his Berserkers thanks to clever positioning of a METAL BOX. Ten Berserkers and their champion charged into battle against 8 Fire Warriors. Laughter turned to horror, however, when the berserkers missed or failed to wound on every attack due to rolling 1s. Horror turned back into hilarity, however, when the Fire Warriors wound up killing half the Berserkers in close-combat and then killed the rest in a Sweeping Advance.

And somewhere, Khorne laughed riotously, for he cares not whence the blood flows.

What the literal fuck though, Khorne.