Fist of the North Star
"You are already dead." - What Kenshiro says at the end of EVERY. FUCKING. FIGHT.
"ATATATATATATATATATATA!!!" - What Kenshiro says at the beginning of EVERY. FUCKING. FIGHT.
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Setting aside the fact that it's manga and anime and thus Weeaboo for a moment, this is the single manliest show in existence. If you got Vance Motherfucking Stubbs, Colonel "I Ripped Off an Eldar Farseer's Leg and Beat Her to Death With It" Straken, General Sturnn, Gabriel Angelos, and Commissar Fuklaw, Khârn and every World Eater in existence to come together and produce a show using only their pure manliness, this is dangerously similar to what they would probably come up with. That plus Weeaboo, anyway.
And the result is a show that whilst loaded with moralfaggotry (and often ironic moralfaggotry), manages to be so in a way that makes it fairly entertaining, which is something that a lot of other works trying to moralfag (I.E. Chick Tracts) fail miserably at.
Yes, you just read that correctly.
Whenever people think about martial arts in animu the first thing that will come to mind is Dragonball Z; many wapanese see this as the beginning of all fighting animu and their respective cliches....but this is not so. Long before Nappa asked Vegeta about Goku's power level or when nigra Cell charged his lazer, or when everyone's power aura ripped up the earth for 10 episodes, in the 1980's there was Fist(ing) Of The North Star (aka: Hokuto No Ken), one of the most violent animu of all time. This laid the foundation for various animu clichés such as gigantic roid raged meat men, power auras, guys fighting while everyone else stands around being useless talking about their techniques, and memes that we now know today. To get an idea , imagine the movie The Road Warrior. Replace Australia with Post-9/11 New York in the year 199X, replace Mel Gibson with a seven foot tall Bruce Lee, and give him a martial art that makes people's heads explode.
Fist of the North Star is a series taking place in a post-apocalyptic world wherein mankind has descended into barbarism and the strong prey upon the weak. Into this horrid world, there is a man who is trained in a martial arts style called Hokuto Shin Ken, which is centered around punching people using their pressure points and causing them to explode in fountains of gore, like an Angry Marine feeding someone a Plasma Grenade. This man is Kenshiro, a genuinely good-hearted protagonist who protects the weak and who is searching for his Fiance, Yuria. And it only gets more epic from there. The series leads across a dizzying array of support characters and antagonists, ranging from hilarious and uplifting to terrifying and tragic.
Like Eisenhorn for the 40K universe, this work is known for its genuinely touching moments as well as its fuckawesome action sequences and hilariously over-the-top violence. It all-but-single-handedly broke the "men aren't allowed to cry" schtick of the 1980s, bringing us the source of MANLY TEARS that would eventually give rise to the Manly Marines.
Paradoxically, so much is in the series that was simply absent from other works of the time, that it stands on its own, like Rogue Trader, even to this very day. Even minor characters are well-developed and well fleshed-out - even the fucking horse. The villains are monstrous (often being as depraved as people can get), but are very human characters and you get a sense of how far they've fallen to get that way. The setting is dark and disturbing, but has bits of genuinely uplifting moments and more than a few bits of hilarity brought about by the dry humor of several characters (Mostly the Protagonist, Kenshiro, and supporting cast members Bat and Rei).
It is a work of such power and depth that it truly transcends its medium. It's a powerful show - as well as a hilariously awesome campaign setting for GURPS or d20 Modern if you want to take it to its extreme, and several fa/tg/uys have already done so.
Chuck Norris wishes he was anywhere near as awesome as any of the protagonists in this series. Even the fucking horse.
Even Khorne tolerates this series, despite the moralfaggotry, weeaboo-ness, and the fact that the Blood was openly censored (by making it glow white, which usually worked, but occasionally resulted in comic gold) in order to get the show past censors and allow it on network TV in its anime format. Presumably the huge body count the show had helped sway the blood god's opinion.
Plot
Near the end of the 20th century, a nuclear flame engulfed most of the Earth's surface, reducing most of the world into a vast desert wasteland. The survivors of mankind banded together in tribes in order to fight over the few supply of uncontaminated food and water still left in the world, with the strong often preying on the weak. Kenshiro, the successor of the assassination art known as Hokuto Shinken, wanders the wasteland after being separated from his fiancee by a rival martial artist. Accompanied by two young children, Bat and Lin, Ken becomes a savior to the weak and innocent from the various gangs threatening their survival. Throughout the course of his journey, Kenshiro encounters various formidable rivals and adversaries, ultimately culminating with Kenshiro's eldest adoptive brother Raoh, an oppressive tyrant who challenges Ken for the right of the Hokuto Shinken succession.
Several years afterward, Kenshiro reunites with the now grown Bat and Lin in order to stand up against a corrupt Imperial Army. The three, with the help of other rebels, manage to expose a conspiracy within the Imperial Army to keep the Heavenly Empress (Lin's estranged twin sister, Lui) imprisoned. The Empress is saved, only for Lin to be taken to the "Land of Asura", a country of warriors where only the mightiest survive. Kenshiro crosses to Asura in pursuit of her, only to find himself fighting against the three generals who rule over the land. Kenshiro finds himself fighting not only against his own blood brother Hyou, but also Kaioh, Raoh's own brother. After defeating Kaioh, Kenshiro goes on a few further adventures with Raoh's orphaned son, Ryu.
Fist of the North Star and /tg/
Fist of the North Star is considered one of the only manga/anime works that /tg/ will openly tolerate, if only because it's widely considered fucking awesome and 100% distilled manliness, despite the fact it's main character screams like a version of Bruce Lee crossed with Doomrider when attacking. General gist is that it's about the only manga/anime /tg/ will openly tolerate, and that's fucking unique.
Suffice to say, there's a few amusing examples of Fist of the North Star's influence on /tg/.
It is often joked that one of several commanders of the Manly Marines is a reference to Kenshiro (he is).
Additionally, the infamous Ranger build, which /tg/ used to break 4e before it even came out, Kenshiro Cascadero "Rattata" Orcuslayer, is named for Kenshiro.
If this isn't enough, several DMs have run humorous and hilarious campaigns in GURPs and d20 Modern by using Fist of the North Star as an example. The combination of a post-apocalyptic world and the fact that the martial arts the protagonists and antagonists use is a form that makes people explode (unless they are using Nanto Seiken, in which case it tears them apart in a matter similar to an Eversor) is a bit of curiosity that has never truly gotten old.
Kenshiro and assorted faggots aside from Roah
KENSHIRO: The main character's name is Kenshiro, who possesses the legendary "Hokuto Shin Ken" fighting style. By punching or poking the correct areas, Kenshiro can make opponents' heads (or any other body part he so chooses) explode by internal pressure, often with results that can only produce lulz. But his signature move which spawned imitations that go on to this day is the "Hokuto Hyakuretsu-Ken" technique which is moonspeak for AAAAAA ATATATATATATATATATATA!!! Basically this attack is Kenshiro screaming like a little girl and punching his opponent in a fury of 1,000 fists
This attack seems to have the same effect on enemies as hitting them just once (causing their head to explode) but just makes it better due to the delay of the head-explosion enabling Kenshiro to deliver his famous line: "You are already dead." Which is listed above.
Other notable attacks in Kenshiro's arsenal include: Hokuto Zankai Ken: He makes you fucking explode. Hokuto Ujou Mosho Ha: He makes you fucking explode peacefully. Ganzan Ryozan Ha: He makes you fucking explode. Goshi Retsu Dan: He makes your hands fucking explode. Ten Ha Kasatsu: He makes you fucking explode, but with lasers. Muso Tensei: He goes through you like a ghost, then makes you fucking explode.
KENSHIRO'S TRUSTY SEX TOYS:
Bart: He exists for no other reason than to drive around and spout out one liners while looking like a faggot. Everyone hates this son of a bitch.
Lynn: The medium through which Kenshiro vents his sexual frustration along with Bart, she exists for no other reason than to screech on how awesome Kenshiro is. She is also apparently telepathically connected to Kenshiro and can contact him by emitting a high pitched squeal. You could write a book on possible interpretations on that and still have them all connected by obvious pedophilia.
Yuria: Kenshiro's girlfriend, though pretty much everyone on Earth wants to fuck her. She gets stolen away by Shin (to be discussed later), only to attempt to become an hero after being unable to handle the deaths of countless innocents that Shin caused for the lulz. She only reunites with Ken at the very end of the first series (yes, there are two, but the second one sucks major ass), and she ends up dying of radiation sickness anyway.
GOOD GUYS WHO AREN'T KENSHIRO:
Shuu: A blind practitioner of Nanto Sei Ken. Unlike most Nanto users, he is actually quite manly, and proves so by carrying a block of stone that probably weighed at least 100 tons on his shoulders up the stairs of a huge pyramid, and makes it to the top despite having enough blood spurting out of him to start a bar for vampires, all for the sake of a bunch of little kids. But that makes him a huge moralfag too.
Rei: Not to be confused with TEH REI, Rei is a pretty boy martial artist who uses Nanto Suicho Ken, a style that lets him wave his arms in FABULOUS ways while yowling like a dying cat, and as a result, slices his enemies to bits. He becomes friends with Ken after Ken helps him save his sister.
EVIL BASTARDS WHO YOU MIGHT ACTUALLY CARE ABOUT:
ROAH: Otherwise known as the Psyker Kung-Fu Antichrist, Roah is Ken's adopted brother and generally looks like a mix between Ghenghis Khan and Chaos Champion after he becomes a warlord. He is also the proud owner of the Horse who kills for the lulz.
Raoh is a huge, overly-muscled bastard who also knows Hokuto Shin Ken, though he's so huge he can overwhelm his foes through sheer muscle. Like Souther, he wants to rule the world, and has an army of countless men to help him. He kills numerous good guys no one cares about, but ultimately gets his ass handed to him by Kenshiro, but an-heroes by simply raising his fist in the air and screaming really loud. This results in a division by zero that makes everyone live happily ever after or something. In Japan, Raoh has a huge fan base, so much that he has his own spinoff anime, and even had an IRL funeral.
Shin: Ken's blonde half-brother and practitioner of Nanto Sei Ken, the opposing style to Hokuto Shin Ken. Jealous that Ken won the right to bang Yuria, he beat the shit out of him, then stabs seven holes in his chest, giving Kenshiro his signature seven scars. After that, he steals Yuria away. Kenshiro ultimately comes back and beats the shit of him. But before he can die, Shin an heroes to avoid the humiliation resulting from dying via Ken's techniques. Was voiced by Steve MOTHERFUCKING Blum and Michael McConnohie in the movie. Michael needs to do a voice for Warhammer 40K.
Heart: The most badass fatass ever seen, and one of Shin's minions. After he has his men kill numerous escaping slaves, Kenshiro gets filled with RAGE and kills all of Heart's men, then attacks him. At first, Ken's attacks are ineffective due to Heart being so fat, but after a creative use of ATATATATATATATATA, Ken makes Heart explode.
Reviews
FIST OF THE NORTH STAR KICKS ASS. IT'S UNGODLY FAGGOTY SOMETIMES, BUT IT KICKS ASS! THE BLOOD SPILLED IS ALMOST ADEQUATE ENOUGH TO PLEASE ME! - Khorne, the Blood God
"Amiba encouraged me to follow my dreams of being a complete bastard and experiment on sentient creatures!" - Dark Eldar Haemonculus
"HENCEFORTH ALL USERS OF DUAL POWER FISTS IN THIS CHAPTER WILL LEARN HOW TO DO THAT FUCKING RAPID-PUNCHING THING OR SO HELP ME I WILL DISCIPLINE YOU." - Temperus Maximus, Angry Marine Chapter Master.
This ALMOST got near the body count I made during my Dominion of Fire." - Angron
/TG/'s RATING
FIGHTING - 6: Unlike Dragonball Z, characters don't spend ages talking about how they're gonna fight or spend whole episodes powering up. So, there's there's lots of actual fighting to be had.
GURO - 9001: No wait, scratch that. The 'fights' in this show basically Kenshiro waving his hands in a general direction and everyone who were supposed to hate explodes in a spray of gore. Except for special cases at the ends of episodes. Khorne likes this show only because of this. Even the horse engages in wholesale slaughter.
Gayness - 9001: As is mandatory for all animu reviewed by /tg/.
Character Depth - 9001: Even the fucking Horse has a detailed fucking backstory. The villains are huge dicks, and this is improved by fleshing them out, to make them more human in spite of them being cockbags. This makes their inevitable comeuppance that much more satisfying and meaningful; an example of what good fucking villains should be like.
Mecha - 1: What giant robots? Kenshiro does punch a WWII-era T-34 Light Tank to scrap, however if it counts.
Manly Tears - 11: This show practically invented them. Some of the scenes in the show are so moving that even the manliest of Neckbeards are moved to tears (Rei's death and Raoh's fight vs. Toki both being well-known points for this). You can sniffle this once. Even Angry Marines are stirred into a slightly-more-reserved anger than usual.
Moralfaggotry - 11: Kenshiro's view of morality is shoved down your throat further than the cock of a forum admin. Fortunately when he does it, it's often done well (I.E. on someone who fucking deserves it) or absolutely fucking hilarious, as it is in this. Even so, it at least attempts to show how moral rightness is not just whimpering in the corner talking about love. It actually shows how to be forceful in the name of righteousness.
Lulz - 7: Despite Kenshiro's rampant moralfaggotry, many innocents die in this series is truly hilarious manners.
HOW TO TROLL FANS
Normally, /tg/ doesn't vilify something it likes, but, due to this being an anime and therefore, weeaboo, we feel it is our duty to provide the tools necessary to destroy it. Below are a few methods by which this may be accomplish, courtesy of the fine pedophiles of Encyclopedia Dramatica:
- Say that Naruto, Dragonball Z, One Piece, and Bleach are better. Fans of FotNS loathe these animes even more than a regular person does, and will explode into a fit of nerd rage at any positive mention of them.
- Say that the second half of the series was far better. Most fans show a virulent hatred for any of the episodes after the death of Raoh.
- Predict that Fist of the North Star: Ken's Rage is going to suck.
- Say that Kenshiro/Raoh is NOT the essence of all that is man. (They aren't, but it serves to piss them off to no end. The proof of this is that Ken and Roah lack beards and are Asian.)
- Comment on how Kenshiro is flat and boring as a character. (We, at /tg/, do not necessarily subscribe to this, but it serves to piss off hardcore fans brutally.)
- Find or make porn of it. (You should know this by now.)