Rebecca Black
 This article is bad, and you should feel bad about it. |
Expect huge amounts of derp and rage, punctuated by /tg/ extracting humor from it. |
Another of several memes that wound up on /tg/ through cross-contamination of /b/ and /v/, Rebecca Black is a fucking horrible singer who did a song called Friday, which can only be described as being akin to subjecting your eardrums to a protracted virus bombing. It is so bad, in fact, that it has managed to drive numerous fa/tg/uys into homicidal frenzies.
This is unusual, for several reasons.
/tg/, historically, knows better than to get involved with hate on music groups/artists that suck - and not simply on matters of principle. When /b/ began a hate-campaign against Justin Beiber, for example, /tg/ just rolled its eyes and went about its usual business of getting shit done, since the userbase of /tg/, being more intelligent than most, knows that in a few short years, he won't even exist in the back of our memories anymore, self-destructing or simply getting too old to be viable, much as was the case for every other fucking useless boy band that came out in the 1990s. Suffice to say, when /b/tards brought news of this particular singer to /tg/, there was rage of a level seldom seen.
None can quite say why the song (and its singer) is so bad; in fact, the entire work as a whole is a rich trapestry of suckage, kind of like a stack of Codexes by Matt Ward. Some parts of the work stand out as particularly stupid; the fact that the entire song is done with the aid of a harmonizer and was done by a bunch of rich white people who think this is akin to Doomrider making a comeback in scope likely does volumes for the hate, as does the obvious 13-year-old driving in the video and the song itself being complete and total feces.
True to form, however, /tg/ has done its time-honored practice of getting shit done and making win out of fail, when one specific fa/tg/uy noticed something that had previously gone unnoticed by most of the other users of /tg/. And when it had been brought to the attentions of those involved, much laughter and humor came about.
Daughter of Boreale
The /tg/ meme of Rebecca Black is somewhat different than the simple ones stemming from other boards; /tg/ argues that Rebecca Black is, in fact, the illegitimate daughter of Indrick Boreale. The similarities in their verbiage is just too hilariously similar to be coincidence. Comparing Boreale's SPESS MEHREENS and EMPRAH to the lyrics of Friday certainly strongly suggests it:
SEVEHN A.M. WAHKEN UP IN TEH MAHRNING
GOTTA BE FRESH GOTTA GO DOWNSTEHRS
GOTTA HEV MY BEHWL, GOTTA HEV CEREAHL
SEEING EVEHRYTHAN, THE TAHM IS GOHN
TICKAHN OHN AND OHN, EVEHRYBAHDY'S RUSSIAN
GOTTA GEHT DAHWN TO TEH BUHS STAHP
GOTTA CATCH MAH BUHS, I SEE MAH FREINDS
GOTTA MAKE MAH MIND UHP
WHICH SEAT CAHN I TAKE?!
IT'S FRIDEH, FRIDEH
GOTTA GET DAHWN ON FRIDEH
EVERYBAWHDY'S LOOKAHN FORWAHRD TO TEH WEEKEHND, WEEKHEHND
FRIDEH, FRIDEH
GETTIN' DAWHN ON FRIDEH
EVERYBAWHDY'S LOOKAHN FORWAHRD TO TEH WEEKEHND
PAHRTAYAHN PAHRTAYAHN (YAH)
PAHRTAYAHN PAHRTAYAHN (YAH)
FAHN,FAHN,FAHN,FAHN
LOOKAHN FORWAHRD TO TEH WEEKEHND (FOR THE EMPRAH)
In Conclusion
The evidence is all-to-clear: Rebecca Black is Boreale's daughter.
Sadly this fact does not make her not suck ass.