Deck of Many Things

This article is a stub. You can help 1d4chan by expanding it

Ohhhhh, holy shit.

Where do we even begin with this?

Well, let's start with the basics.

The infamous Deck of Many Things is a magical item that made its debut in the Greyhawk setting of Dungeons & Dragons. The exact size of the deck (and thus its contents and effects) varies with the edition, but throughout its existence, one thing has remained consistent: its potential for inciting complete and utter chaos with the draw of a card, the likes of which can be generously described as a hazard to the adventuring party, the setting, and the players and DM alike.

So how exactly does it work? Well, assuming your DM is foolish enough yo allow you to obtain one, the deck is basically just an ordinary deck of cards, with each card corresponding to a specific effect. Some of the cards have good effects (gain a level, obtain wealth, etc) and some effects are bad (idiocy, instant death, etc). You can choose to draw however many cards you want, but players with at least some sense in them will opt for a small number, as the probability of drawing a card that will completely buttfuck you increases with each card. And if you happen to survive your ordeal, you may find that your character's life circumstances are so drastically different that it completely derails the campaign if it hasn't already. Whether it's your character losing ever save throw, or turning into a greedy bag of dicks, the wisest option may simply be to just say no.