2d4chan - User contributions [en]

Eliphas The Inheritor

2012-09-11T10:27:19Z

117.102.33.135:

[[File:Eliphas the Inheritor.jpg|thumb|right|250px|Gentlemen, the only competent Chaos Lord in Dawn of War]]
Eliphas the Inheritor or simply Eliphas is a Chaos Lord featured in the Warhammer 40K Dawn of War Vidya geym series. He made his first appearance in [[Dawn of War]]: Dark Crusade where he led the [[Word Bearers]] legion on Kronus and surprisingly made a future appearance in [[Dawn of War 2]]'s expansion: Chaos Rising, as a champion of the [[Black Legion]]. Eliphas is an Ensemble Darkhorse. That means that he's a character who's gained a level of popularity that was unexpected as he was intended as a one shot character, being a villain protagonist/main villain in Dark Crusade. This was due to a number of factors, the most significant being that he was '''badass'''.

Eliphas was truly an anomaly. In a [[Lord Bale|long]] [[Crull|line]] of [[Metal Boxes|incompetent]] [[Chaos Lord]]s, he was actually a legitimately cool character. His was a personality of insane zealotry, berserk bloodthirst, and dark charisma, and [[Creed|tactical brilliance]]. He had excellent voice acting, an excellent aesthetic, and also had wondrous gameplay. He was without doubt one of the most deadly hero units in all of Dark Crusade. Capable of taking down and destroying utterly Gorgutz 'Ead Unter and the Necron Lord (unless he used that Essence of the Nightbringer ability, or simply blew him into tiny chunks with the lightning ability, or dicked around by turning incorporeal and regenerated to full health at the speed of light then popping back and raping him again, seriously, Artifacts allow the Necron lord to handily outclass Eliphas). Especially, considering that this was the time Dawn of War was gaining more RPG traits. He also was loved for his sinister, cruel quips and dickish manners. Consistently putting down his enemies not only on the battlefield, but also with his eloquence. He was also the one who revealed to the Blood Ravens their possible descent from a Traitor Legion, making him incredibly important to the overarching plot arc of the Blood Ravens.

Despite his apparent death in Dawn of War: Dark Crusade, Eliphas' legions of fans did not go unnoticed, and he was brought back as the main villain in the Chaos themed expansion to Dawn of War II, Chaos Rising. Here is where some people think it all went a bit down hill.

Eliphas was downgraded here from a mighty Chaos Lord into a mere Chaos Champion, under the command of an equally badass Chaos Lord named Araghast. This new appearance of Eliphas did away with the character's badass helmet and voice. As Paul Dobson was replaced with [[Steve Blum]]. Steve Blum's voice acting as excellent all the same and many consider him equal to Paul or indeed, surpassing him. However, others feel that the voice didn't need to be changed and were disappointed. Some fans felt alienated and when Eliphas was defeated yet again, some decided to look to Araghast himself as Eliphas' successor. Ultimately, Eliphas was less well received in Chaos Rising and a percentage of his fanbase were disillusioned with the character. It was also implied in the end that Eliphas in fact served the [[Abaddon|the most despised failure of a Chaos Lord ever to cheapen the Name of Chaos]]. This evoked the expected [[RAGE|response]]

But that changed with Retribution, Eliphas was given Terminator armour and was made a playable character again. Where he was once again the single most powerful melee combatant in the game and could now get DAEMON SWORDS. He was also given some of the best writing and truly seemed like the brutal evil warlord he always used to be. Unfortunately, he had to suck up to Abaddon again, but hey. What did you want him to do? Spout out every reason why he's a failure to his face? [[Games Workshop]] would throw a bitchfit.

So yeah, people are generally divided on what to think of Eliphas, but most agree that he's a complete badass. Probably the most iconic character in the game, second only to Angelos.

== Dark Crusade ==
Eliphas was known to be already present on Kronus during the events of Horus Heresy, where he participated in a battle against the Ultramarines as a young champion. When the Word Bearers were routed by the Ultrafags, he was damned to the Basilica of Torments and returned to the mortal plane after a thousand years of torment as a mighty and terrible Chaos Lord of the Word Bearers and brought others under his warband.

Later, during the opening phases of the Dark Crusade, Eliphas and the Word Bearers were summoned back to Kronus by a Chaos cult at the Third Temple of Black Succession in the far south of the Deimos Peninsula. This cabal had turned to Chaos in light of their experiences with the recent rise of the Necrons on Kronus, and Eliphas had answered. Using the knowledge gained from The Book of the Epistles of Lorgar, their leader Virgilius planned to bring Eliphas to Kronus. On the eighth night of their visit to the Temple, Virgilius led them to the great chamber at the temple's heart, where he and eight of his cultists were sacrificed on an icon of Chaos. The Warp opened between the points of the eight-pointed star and Eliphas stepped forth, heralding the beginning of the Ninth Inheritance. Thus, presumably, we have an idea on how he got his name. Eliphas' objective is slaughter the other powers on the planet in glorification of Khorne and bring it under his thrall as a daemon world. Throughout the campaign he has the following opportunities to get even closer to the Dark Gods.

He gets even more favour with the Blood God by assraping the Orks and giving the big guy their skulls along with that of [[Crull]]'s. Slaanesh's by busting open Eldar soulstones so that the hermaphroditic freak can have a late night snack, Papa Nurgle's by releasing a Great Unclean One from captivity, and Tzeentch's by pwning Necrons. Also he can get the favour of Abbadon if he fucks off the blood ravens (maybe Abbadon was watching and decide that he has wonderful arms...you now) and the favour of Lorgar by raping Tau(because he hates the weeboo communists even more than /tg/ and that's saying something).

How much of this he actually accomplished is up to debate, though due to his closeness to Khorne, we can assume he at least retrieved Crull's skull from Gorgutz in a skirmish or something. In the end, however, Eliphas was defeated by Davian Thule and his Blood Magpies and was judged by Daemon Prince into oblivion.

== Chaos Rising ==
As a result of his unexpected popularity, Eliphas returns in Chaos Rising. He fights as a champion for the Black Legion against the Blood Ravens in Aurelia, having been brought back to life by bargaining his way from the Warp and just fighting his way out in other segments. Like a true badass out of hell. He then joins forces with [[Araghast the Pillager]] and serves as his second-in-command. Only to SSSSINNNNDRRRIII his new master when he runs afoul of Force Commander Hair-Gel and his merry band of Hair-atics. Despite this apparent badassery, Eliphas was defeated by the Blood Ravens anyway during their attack on Keep Selanon, despite being the most fucking hard to kill boss in the game aside from Martellus (FFFFFUUUUUU!!!) and Ulkair (MOTHERFUUUU!!!)

He's later seen in the Judgement of Carrion, speaking to a strangely armed Abaddon. Though behind the scenes footage reveals that another Chaos terminator was in fact behind Abaddon serving as his arms. Eliphas swears to Abaddon that we will destroy the Blood Ravens. Depending on whether you think he was trying to set the prologue for the Blood Ravens to destroy themselves in a civil war or simply to outright destroy the sub-sector; Eliphas could arguably have succeeded here or come close to it.

== Retribution ==
[[Image:RetributionEliphas2.jpg|thumb|right|275px|Eliphas back to being his awesome old self again...still needs a helmet though.]]

Eliphas apparently channels the spirit of Araghast's badassness in this expansion. His voice has grown angrier and he seems to exhibit some Blood Knight tendencies. He gets the one liners we all know and love from Dark Crusade back too. He also screams, 'BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD!' very often, implying he's gravitating to Khorne. Yes, it seemed as if Eliphas was finally back to his old self...

Of course, that's before he starts sucking the minuscule cock of Failaddon. Yeah, that's right. Abaddon is in this game. With a VA no less. He sounds like if Araghast has his massive balls torn off, but hey, what did we expect from Failaddon. His only purpose in the game is to whinge at you, and screech about how he wants Kyras dead. And that's because if Kyras sacrifices the Blood Ravens, he'll become a Warmaster of Chaos and a Daemon Prince. Realizing that his own incompetence shall avail him naught against a [[C.S.Goto|Librarian Devotee of Khorne]], he enlists/blackmails Eliphas into his service, who is no doubt unaware of the armlessness. However, many people have chalked up Eliphas' subordination to Abaddon as politeness. After all, we all feel a shred of sympathy for Abaddon. Even 10,000 year old, bloodthirsty humanoid abominations who fanatically worship All-Powerful Gods of Evil and who wield mighty weapons not intended for the hands of noble, right thinking men.

Even so, Eliphas is simply so much fun to play in this expansion. Hell yeah, specc him out as a Champion of Khorne with fully upgraded sweeping doom, spend all remaining points in Nurgle, point and kill. Switch on Sweeping Doom on a horde, hell yeah, everything dies. Additionally, upon becoming a Champion of Khorne, that alone causes him to outdamage both Diomedes and Bluddflag. Speccing the rest of your points as Nurgle turns Eliphas into an unstoppable rape-machine that makes those two look like simpering pansies. And then, when you get Eliphas a Daemon Sword, well, given the tremendously high damage he'll do with it, and from his auras, and his health leeching, any attempt to face him in combat will be met with said person being torn to bloody shreds in under a second. Let us simply say that; Eliphas is a badass.

He starts out in Typhon hunting Thule, he tracks the old bastard Dreadnaught down and takes him out to some rather badass exchange. Killing Davian Thule is however, the most emotionally crippling thing in the campaign. :( Well that, and not finding a Daemon Sword or a helmet. He goes after Kyras, killing copious amounts of shit and then takes the big-ass Daemon Prince down. Taking some time to make Kyras bow before him first before banishing him to the void. He then ascends to Daemonhood and kills the Inquisitorial forces in Aurelia. After sacrificing the Blood Ravens to Abaddon and the entire sector to Khorne.

Excellent campaign, excellent ending. Especially the implication that once he's done with Kyras, Abaddon is next. See, Eliphas has a <s>bad</s> good habit of SINDRI-ing his superiors. Though, we use the word 'superiors' loosely, given that this Failbaddon the Armless of whom we speak.

==Eliphas'dialogues==
*[http://www.youtube.com/user/BigDickCheney#p/u/95/oMc5dCC41Ss Being dickish with Captain Thule] - In retrospect, this was oddly prophetic.
*[http://www.youtube.com/user/BigDickCheney#p/u/93/ae6Fao42aHE Against Captain Thule] - This was prophetic, too.
*[http://www.youtube.com/user/BigDickCheney#p/u/91/mOwu8j_KeeA Eliphas being dickish with Governor Alexander]
*[http://www.youtube.com/user/BigDickCheney#p/u/86/QPeNOEdVmbc Even when about to face defeat, he's still a dick]
*[http://www.youtube.com/user/BigDickCheney#p/u/79/JL6LNePez0U Dick+Comic Relief=lolwut]
*[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MbNfdyfDvvc&feature=relmfu Eliphas' dialogue in the sexiest language of all]
*[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F6IEqca_elI&feature=related Despite false Blood Raven propaganda, this is how Eliphas actually usurped Araghast]

== Trivia ==
*He seems to be suffering from a severe case of Throat Cancer as his voice constantly changes tone.
*<strike>People argue furiously over whether his Daemon Prince ascension piece of wargear is worth taking or not.</strike> Daemon Princehood is the Worst Wargear in the campaign, and in most respects is actually a ''downgrade'' in terms of both abilities, offensive and defensive power, and useful secondary effects (upgraded Chaos Lord Eliphas provides constant morale drain, is immune to knockback/knockdown, etc; Daemon Prince Eliphas does not, though Daemon Prince Eliphas is indeed immune to knockback) in Dark Crusade.
*He has equal appearances with Gorgutz, though he is the only evil character to return from the original DoW series and, so far, the recurring villain character in DoW II.
*He's either named after the first man to commit murder and to be executed in the state of New Hampshire, or some French Occultist.
*Ironically considering his origins as an undivided lord, speccing him out as Khorne is the only way to make him effective in the campaign unless you specifically intend to fuck around with the options the other options offer (and they lack the balls-out melee punch of the former). Speccing him out as Khorne makes him more effective a combatant than every other melee campaign hero put together. This is rather fitting, seeing as how Eliphas roars out; 'Blood for the Blood God!" and "Skulls for the Skull Throne!" very often during gameplay.
*Speccing him out as Khorne not only makes him the most damaging unit in the game, it also makes him into the most successful troll in the game aside from that asshole; Kyras. Any unit hitting him will become consumed with RAGE and start hitting each other. Using the Berzerk ability on Eliphas will also cause everyone else to become FUCKANGRY.
* Evidence from Retribution and Dawn of War: Dark Crusade show that Eliphas serves Khorne above all the other Chaos Gods. The proof for this is that, Khorne is the only Chaos God he invokes by name (along with Tzeentch) and generally acts pretty Khornate. He likes fighting and killing more than regular Chaos Lords and gets angry pretty quickly.[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0DJCii1NAYw He also invokes Khorne more than the other Chaos Gods.] It is finally proved in Retribution, where he literally screams the infamous 'Blood for the Blood God! Skulls for the Skull Throne!' warcry regardless of whichever specialization you give him and generally keeps invoking Khorne at the exclusion of every other God except Slaanesh when killing Eldar, and Nurgle, when he tells their followers to fuck off. And he's not respectful in either instance. He also has this frightening fixation on bleeding his enemies out, as is noticed in the first Chaos mission.
*Spends every Friday night with his friends prank calling Shas'O Kais, unaware that the confused Tau is only getting static. Everybody's phone bill goes up- nobody wins.
*Eliphas can be given a permanent helmet in DoWII Retribution via a very well done and easy to install mod. http://forums.relicnews.com/showthread.php?257214-MOD-Shuma-s-Wargear-room-Advertisement-Retribution-beta-ranked-compatible-mods. You can give me a blowjob later.
**Would forcing my sister to give you a blowjob instead work?
**Yes.
* He is Belgian.

==Memorable Quotations==
*"'''BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD'''!" - Eliphas, channeling Araghast's badassness.

*"'''SKULLS FOR THE SKULL THRONE!'''" - Because Khorne > Every other Chaos God.

*"''Do not be so quick to make foolish offers, Daemon. Araghast too once though I would be an asset to his cause. Look to what has become of him.''" - Eliphas being a badass.

*"''You wish to honor Lord Nurgle? THEN DO SO FROM THE GRAVE!''" - Eliphas, upon slaughtering a coven of Nurglite guardsmen, also is funny because decomposition joke.

*"''YOU FIGHT FOR NOTHING, YOU ARE NOTHING!''" - Eliphas, upon soloing a Landraider.

*"''Observe, brothers. Observe how Space Marines choose to die, and how little choice they have in the matter. Come Davian, we have unfinished business!''" - Eliphas, just about to kill Davian Thule, the bastard.

*"'''THE ETERNAL WAR ENDS FOR YOU THIS DAY!!'''" - Eliphas, out-Khornate-ing a an Alpha <s>Black</s> Legion (<s>what in the fucking eleven circles of hell would make you think that the deranged chaos champion was from the Alpha legion?</s> Perhaps because he bore Alpha Legion colours? (Nonsensical rambling, no legion like that <u>ever existed</u>) Chaos Champion, while Typhon was getting the shit blown out of it. Said Champion died in one hit.

*"'''WHY DOES ANYTHING THINK I CAN BE KILLED!?!'''" - Eliphas, shrugging off bolter fire and in the mood for some rape.

*"''Oh, Davian, He cannot hear you.''" - Eliphas upon killing Davian Thule, the bastard.

*"''Such inspiring courage! Perhaps we'll mount your corpse on a golden chair and make an idol out of you as well.''" - The quote that solidified Eliphas' popularity amongst the Imperium hating Heretics.

*"''An ambush, we are finished! /sarcasm''" - Eliphas mocks the Blood Raven's unmanly attempts to kill him while also being sarcastic. Oddly enough, most people who hear this line miss the obvious sarcasm. Which can lead you to suspect that most people are monkeys.

*"''Then I wont lie to you brother. You have been lied to enough''." - Eliphas, to Thule.

*"''No coward has ever remained hidden from the Black Legion! I will relish in your soul's eternal suffering!''" - Eliphas expresses his idealized view of the Black Legion whilst calling Kyras' a faggot and calling him out to some FIGHTAN.

*"''CAN YOU WEAKLINGS NOT FIGHT ANY BETTER?!''" - Can YOU scream this to an on-rushing army of Orks after having slaughtered their Warboss? No, you can't.

*"'''These are the Blood Ravens; finest slaves of the Dead Emperor. We owe them ''much'' more than a quick death.'''" - Eliphas, alluding to how he shall rape the Blood Ravens.

*"''Yesss... Come into my home, Taldeer.''" - Eliphas killed the Vindicare Assassin and raped Taldeer. Truth.

*"''The people here have already accepted the Black Testament. So will you.''" - Eliphas is a religious badass. Far moar so than any SPESSH MEHREEN.

*"''Come! See the Faith of my Crusaders, they shall soon cleanse you of your disbelief.''"

*"''Well done! You have come further in this blessed land than I ever thought! Lord Khorne shall drink your blood from the very soil!''"

*"'''IN BATTLE, WE ALL HONOUR KHORNE!!!'''" - Eliphas always did worship Khorne above all the other Gods.

*"''You cannot impede the Black Inheritance.''" - Eliphas, unlike a [[Abaddon|certain other Chaos Lord who's first name is Ezekyle]], has a reason for his title.

*"''No...that cannot be so...''" - Eliphas when responding to the Necron Lord of Kronus telling him of the coming storm of Matt Ward.

==Internet activity==
Eliphas has also a [http://www.youtube.com/channel/UCu-gp8eEmEz4bDt2Q5pXVbQ/videos youtube account], Where he posts random [Awesome|heretical] short videos about his many adventures. Recently, he has killed Dreadnaught Carron, recovered Abaddon's arms, killed Captain Falcon and has become best friends with Davian Thule. He has also gotten even with the Daemon Prince who sent him to the basilica of Torments. [[Awesome|And has thrown HIM into the basilica in turn]].

{{Template:Chaos-Marines}}
[[Category:Warhammer 40,000]][[Category:Chaos]][[Category:Space Marines]]

Games Workshop

2012-09-11T09:27:44Z

117.102.33.135: Undo revision 131969 by Tim (talk) Now, what do you have against the truth, sir?

'''Games Workshop''' used to be good. See [[Beakie]], [[Rogue Trader]] and [[Talisman]].
[[Image:1271198871887.jpg|thumb|right|250px|Games Workshop's typical meeting board]]
They started out [[Old School Roleplaying|making shit that you could use in other publishers games]], and printing American [[RPG]]s up in [[Brits|jolly olde Angleterre]]. Soon they made a wargame and a few board games and people began to take them seriously as something other than a magazine publisher.

=More about=
It is a well kept secret that the Board of Directors of GW are in the same situation as the [[God-Emperor of Mankind]] from Warhammer 40,000. Their defiled corpse-bodies lay dormant upon their Publishing Thrones, maintaining only the smallest semblance of life due to the constant influx of money. It is unknown what would happen if the Board of Directors were allowed to truly die. Some say Games Workshop would collapse in on itself, ceasing the production of all that is good and expensive. Perhaps Games Workshop would be free from the necrotic collar of the Directors' irresistible will, and the company would be free to explore new areas, such as advancing the story of the Warhammer 40,000 universe, or reviving older "specialist" games like [[Space Hulk]] and Blood Bowl.

Much to the embarassment of the entire rest of the industry, they are the biggest single seller of military miniatures. But these are not ''scale mini-chures'', so modelling neckbeards ignore them and get back to folding 1:35 scale photo-etched hydrogen molecules for their dioramas.

=History=

==The Age of Munchkins==
[[Image:Haet trees.jpg|thumb|FUCK TREES]]After the awesomeness of [[Rogue Trader]] at the dawn of time, Games Workshop came out with ''Warhammer Fantasy Battle'' and ''Warhammer 40,000'', the latter normally called ''Second Edition''. Both systems were built around small units of infantry supporting ridiculously munchkinized special characters with complicated rules and wargear and appropriately pricey lead models (''Warhammer'' was often referred to as ''Herohammer'' because of this), but at this stage Games Workshop actually cared somewhat about customers; models were made in plastic or wallet-friendly, Roman-Empire-collapsing lead, game sets included serviceable army lists and collections of miniatures, and paints were provided in 20ml pots, later 17.5ml. This switch was perhaps the first sign of the next age.

At some point it was determined that the stock army lists weren't enough, and so Army Books (for Warhammer) and Codex Books (for 40K) began to come out, each bringing new models and rules into the game. The last round of these for 40K (''Codex: Tyranids'' in particular) tended to make the army ridiculously overpowered and make everyone ''else'' want a new Codex to rectify the balance. Perhaps the ultimate example of ''Second Edition'' philosophy was the last book, ''Codex: Assassins'', which consisted of nothing but four hideously powerful special characters. These included [[Culexus|this asshole]] who caused the psychology effect ''Terror'' to all psykers, regardless of anything, meaning Greater Daemons and Hive Tyrants would occasionally shit themselves and run for the hills when faced with a normal-sized human.

One notable aspect of this period was that Games Workshop hated trees, and would thus include several million cards in every boxed set if given the slightest provocation; the core sets for ''Warhammer'' and ''Warhammer 40,000'' both received an update governing the magic / psychic system which consisted solely of cards and templates (which were card). Some entire games (''Doom of the Eldar'', ''Battle for Armageddon'', ''[[Horus_Heresy#The_Board_Game|Horus Heresy]]'') came out in this period which consisted of nothing but a board and lots of high-density card counters to lose down the back of the sofa or inside the dog.

==The Age of Stealing Your Money==
Sometime in the run-up to ''Third Edition'' it was decided that models should switch from toddler-murdering lead to safe, pointy pewter (or "white metal" as GW insisted on calling it). This led to a 25% cross-board increase in all metal mini costs, even those ordered through Citadel's back catalog. At this point, it seems, something clicked in the heads of GW's management; they had just made a ton more money without actually doing anything. Perhaps they could do that again.

''Third Edition'' 40K and the new ''Warhammer'' soon came around, both reducing the dominance of single munchkin characters in favour of large armies, conveniently meaning players had to buy far more models. Then along came the fucking screw-tops, and proof that any pretense of caring about the customer had been cast aside.

The "problem" with the older paintpot designs was they actually kept [[paint]] usable for a long time; while the fliptops suffered from shit hinges and opening tabs which would both break after about four uses, they were good for years of storage. Obviously this was no good to GW, and so a new pot, the Screw(you)top, was designed which would gunk up its own thread and either glue itself shut forever or prevent an airtight seal forming after a couple of uses. Apparently forgetting ''every other company in existence'' that made model paints, GW also raised the price of these new and terrible things; clearly justified, since they contained a mere 30% less paint than the old design. It was also around this point that photographs of the [['Eavy Metal]] studio started to vanish from the pages of ''White Dwarf'' (along with all other content that could be considered useful for anything at all) since they kept forgetting to hide all their non-Citadel gear for photoshoots. Even though, of course, everyone had known for ''years'' that the painters didn't "mix Snot Green with a little Chaos Black" to get a paint shade that was in Tamiya or Vallejo's stock range. Nowadays we can get the good stuff for cheap from [[Privateer Press]], but back then it was just ''fucking'' terrible.

Prices began to ramp up ridiculously as GW realized they could charge whatever the hell they liked and people would still pay. While GW was never particularly cheap, their chunky kits ended up in the same price bracket as top-quality scale miniatures by other companies; today, a [[Citadel Miniatures|Citadel]] [[Leman Russ Battle Tank|Leman Russ]] (a 95-part kit entirely cast in plastic) costs about the same as a Dragon M1A2 Abrams (an 817-part multimedia kit including 98 in etched brass and a turned metal gun barrel). At some point, someone remembered that back in ''Second Edition'' days they actually had people willing to pay for gigantically expensive, limited-edition lead Thunderhawk Gunships. To hit this niche of "people with more money than sense," [[Forge World]] was created; all you had to do was get mom and dad to sign that second mortgage and stop being so damn selfish and a 40K-scale Titan would be yours.

==The Fall of Warhammer==
It's finally fucking happened. As of May 11th, 2011, Games-Workshop's new terms of use [[Embargo | restricts sales of all of their products to the European Economic Area]], (EU + Norway, Switzerland and Iceland). Obviously, this means that GW's English-speaking customers outside the EEA - Canada, Australia, New Zealand, and the US, as well as customers in other countries who are fans of their products can no longer obtain them through FLGS or online wholesalers (Actually, I think this is incorrect. I believe it just means they can't order online from outside their country but needs reference). (It IS incorrect. It only applies to online stores. FLGS can continue to buy and sell GW products at their normal prices).

So enjoy spending 30-80 dollars on shipping for your order, which can no longer have free shipping for bulk, since you're now ordering international - if you can even order the fucking things at all in your region. Oh, and they spiked the prices another 10-15% for most models.

Additionally, all metal models are being discontinued, to be replaced with much more expensive [[Finecast|Resin]] kits. Unlike the pewter kits (which are basically tin), the resin kits are loaded with carcinogens; strange, since last anyone checked the reason for switching to pewter in the first place was that lead was toxic (and nothing to do with hiking the price). And they are actually much, ''much'' [[Casting|cheaper]] to produce than the pewter models because plastic is a hell of a lot cheaper than metal. And they also break fairly easily so that all the little ten year old Smurf players have to buy new ones when they snap them in half. So essentially, Games Workshop not only ruined the quality of their models, they jacked up the prices and made it nearly impossible for anyone outside EU to obtain it. Kinda like going from fine French wine to your corner-store cheap beer.....and the beer is more expensive than the wine. Yes, we're also wondering how much more retarded GW can get.

Because Games-Workshop fucking hates you, about the only way this could be made worse is if [[Games Workshop|GW]] decided to forcefully shove a [http://files.sharenator.com/rapex_condom_Anti_Rape_Device-s418x278-25757.jpg RAPEX] onto your dick each and every time you placed an order, and even that's debatable.

Games Workshop have sat pretty at the top of the miniature wargames shit-heap for many years (indeed, the scale models industry tries to ignore that they're the biggest single seller of miniatures) and have abused this position to increase their own profits. However, fortunately for the long suffering gamer alternatives are emerging. [[Privateer Press]] for example produce the games [[Warmachine]] and [[Hordes]] and offers cheaper models and starter sets. In the market for wargames Privateer is rapidly emerging as a viable challenger to GW's monopoly.

Also worthy of note is [[Mantic Games]] who produce [[Kings of War]], a fantasy battle game in a similar vein to Warhammer. The rules system was even written by former GW man Alessio Cavatore and its fast, fluid and a lot more fun than Warhammer. The company is pioneering the use of plastic-resin alloy (or 'restic') as a cost effective alternative to pewter. Oh, and equivalent plastic models cost about HALF what GW charge (e.g. GW High Elf Spearmen (16 models) - £20, Mantic Games Elf Spearmen (20 models) - £13.99).

One can only hope that these new upstarts will beat down GWs monopolistic hold on the [[wargame]] market.

=The Digital Age (And Completely Missing the Point)=
So Games Workshop has discovered the internet, and they realize that they weren't squeezing enough cash out of you already. So they went to the iTunes store to sell their books online. And they're still overpriced for what you're getting.

=Why Games Workshop is Bad and it Should Feel Bad=
When speaking of a company, a person is tempted to think of a large body of human beings coming together in an efficient group. The group is governed, and it is thought that someone is there to ascertain the best possible choices are being made granted the information available at hand. However, this perspective, like most of 40k's explicit war “tactics”, is absolute nonsensical trash.

Never mind that large groups are often less efficient due to the fact that most people like to agree and be part of a group, even if the group is wrong. Forget that the burden of hard work is often shrugged off thanks to the assumption that everyone else will be carrying enough of the real challenges to pull things through. Instead, focus on the fact that the people heading GW – or most large corporations for that matter – are successful, rich, ordinary men who are blessed by good fortune in an unfair universe and probably don't realize the reality. Further, examine the knowledge that, according to Sun Tzu and a variety of psychological studies, successful rich people with the profound luck are the folks most likely to make stupid mistakes out of anyone!

Now you know why GW is run the way it is.

A source of some debate on /tg/ is whether or not GW is actually charging prices that make sense for the hobby. All logic points to a resounding “no”, but another interesting social phenomena is this: fanboyism is an inbuilt human process. Whenever money is spent on a good, especially a luxury item, man has a way of increasing the illusionary worth of that item.

Imagine buying tickets to see your local team play football, and they lose. It's not even a good game, to be honest. People around the country were disappointed. However, those tickets cost a lot of money, and having spent all that money for so little in return makes a person feel stupid. We grope for other things, then, to make the tickets worth while. Yes, it was cold, but your wife was there, so you bonded! The beer was too expensive as well, but they sold your favorite brand! You had an experience! It was fun! Yes, those tickets were worth it in the end.

We'll even do this with soft drinks. Even if brain probes reveal a man likes Pepsi more than Coke, going back and telling the man what he was drinking can actually ''alter his memory'' so that he remembers liking the Coke more. It's amazing.

GW products are exactly the same way. They're ludicrously expensive. Even people who support GW fervently wish they weren't. It hurts. In a rough economy, it's hard to play the game. You spend months, years – who knows how long waiting for that new codex, it turns out to be awful compared to expectations (hello, Tyranids!), and now you've either got to suck it up and keep playing (got to buy the new Trygons, I guess, even though they aren't ''that'' great), or take a huge monetary loss and give up. Fanboyism steps in and makes it all okay. You're not just buying the models, but the game and the network utility too, so 40k is still totally fun and cool!

Big corporations, and GW as well, are predators. They feast on fanboyism. Like the [[Dark Eldar]], they prey on your suffering and write sick, stomach-turning poetry about the flowing, green streams of vital wealth they siphon from your being. You are a toy. [[Hot Chicks|That cute girl at the convenience store you see all the time?]] Thanks to GW, you have to choose between inviting her to the theater and buying that new squadron of Guardsmen. Those of you scoffing at the dilemma, shut up; those Guardsmen are not going to nag nearly as much after you've had them for a little while, so it's [[Neckbeard|totally a tough call.]]

But putty in their hands you may be, there are still some principles of basic economics that imply GW ''might not be earning enough revenue,'' and surprisingly, they can only lose more money by raising prices! There's no real way of knowing how things really are within GW without a look at the delicate, inner machinery they need to shoo Matt Ward's putrid, corrosive stench away from. But it does all come back to our first consideration: GW is run by the type of person most notable for making poor decisions – successful people, and a group, no less.

The situation is thus: there is more to money flow than just the bottom line, though often it's all we think of, but basically there's income, cost, and revenue. What is of most concern is revenue, which could also be thought of as [[profit]]. GW sells their models for a greater amount than what they cost, and the amount they make is revenue!

So now, there's revenue, and then there's marginal revenue. Revenue is just how much you make. Sell a thousand Guardsmen and make ten thousand dollars? Your Guardsmen revenue is $10,000! Marginal revenue, on the other hand, is how much you make ''per item''. In this case, the Guardsmen have a marginal revenue of $10. Each Guardsman made a profit of $10. See? Easy.

Now let's raise prices. From now on, we'll sell half as many Guardsmen per box, and the boxes will cost the same. Now marginal revenue is $22, because every time a Guardsman is sold, we bring in $20 per Guardsman plus an additional $2 gets saved thanks to the Guardsmen we didn't make! This is cool – we're in business, just like GW, /tg/! Let's do that again – our customers are fans, they'll bare it! Now we'll sell five Guardsmen to a box, and we have a marginal revenue of $45!

Okay, wait, wait. I've got it. I'm a genius. Let's sell one Guardsman. Sell it for the same price we used to sell twenty of them! We're going to be rich! Marginal revenue is going to be amazing! Like, what, over a hundred dollars a purchase?

So what's our profit in the end? What! Negative? How!? We're making ''so much'' per model! The marginal revenue is ''so high''!

The answer is simple. Not enough people are buying one crappy Guardsman for $200 dollars. A few of the fans are sticking it out, hating us relentlessly, but newcomers to the game see the price tag and run screaming. People who can't afford it leave because they have no other choice, but they're happy in retrospect. Even some of our most loyal customers finally decided to just date that girl after all – she's not nearly as pricey and they'll deal with her constant bitching. Actual revenue is at an all time low.

Believe it or not, companies really do make this mistake, albeit not to this extent (unless you check out [[Forge World]], anyway. Anyone want a Tau [[Manta]]? Only costs more than $1,000). It's because maximizing marginal revenue is very easy. It's simple arithmetic, and if your market base is rather inelastic (and GW's market base certainly is due to the high investment requirements of their games), a lot of times price changes won't have a huge impact, so it's easier to focus on. GW is at some point in the middle here, where it has started to become questionable.

It's hard to say if they're making right decisions or if their pricing makes the most sense. It's becoming the status quo that their games are really a hobby of those with absurd disposable income, which is not a quality described of the young men who are presumed to make up 40k's primary demographic. It's possible that they're targeting young teens with parents who will buy the models for them, but that's hard to say as well since parents will lack the dedicated fanboyism to continually invest in the absurdly priced hobby.

Mix in unbalanced rules that unfairly favor certain factions, long wait times between army updates, [[Casting|inferior model quality]] compared to what's provided to model hobbyists outside of the wargaming industry, and GW may have a recipe for a failing market.

=to do=
{{Template:Stub}}
* Fire the whole management staff, they're the cunts here. But keep the retail staff.
* LOWER THEIR FUCKING PRICES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! '''YEAH ABOUT THAT...HAAHAHA ''FAGGOT'''''
* Stop trying to monopolise things like terrain and game boards. It was a lot more fun and interesting when GW encouraged people to make their own stuff from scratch, but now they seem to think everyone has to have a Citadel Realm of Battle board and use only the plastic terrain kits that are sold at GW. This pisses off all us proper gamers who like to make things that look unique and original. Also, they really should stop selling those stupidly overpriced movement trays for [[warhammer]], they're cheaper and easier to make using sheets of plasticard and trimmed down sprues! Also, everyone knows "Green Stuff" is "Kneadatite" and that every other company in existence sells it more cheaply than GW does.
* Stop charging ridiculous prices for cheap and nasty tools with the Citadel brand on them. The £20 novelty flamer airbrush is inferior in every meaningful way to a £5 Silverline. The Citadel Razor Saw with a fixed, low-quality blade costs more than a decent razor saw with interchangeable blades (hell, some places will hook you up with a Tamiya saw with two blades for £10). The "Citadel Hobby Vice" is ''utterly useless''. People do not automatically come to GW for every single thing the hobby requires because they realise GW's idea of service is sticking its dick in their wallet and fucking their credit card to death.
* Update the Sisters of Battle instead of constantly updating all the space marines for chrissake - you'd have more people buying more armies! (Maybe GW just hates money?) I mean goddamn, how many flavors of smurfs can people possibly want?
** Progressively fewer, if the sales figures are any fucking indication.
*** Update Necrons and Sisters of Battle? We know [[Matt_Ward|just the guy]] for that. [[Dohohoho|DOHOHOHO!]]
**** And it happened. The [[Necrons]] are now forever tainted by Matt Ward.
* Cut the production costs and therefore prices of their products. This is a good business decision as it would increase volume while retaining profit margins, especially considering the upcoming movie if it receives a theatrical release will bring in interested people. Lowering prices increases accessibility while also increasing demand, and when you have more customers buying shit at worst you suffer minimal profit loss if you decrease the prices by the right amount.
* Start advertising. Without the infamous "In the grim darkness of the 41st Millennium there is only WAR!" ad we never would have the term "grimdark". Also promote Warhammer Fantasy more. Without it there would have never been a Warhammer 40k in the first place.
* MOAR PLASTIC MODELS!!!!
** NOT [[Finecast|LIKE THAT]] YOU MORONS!!!!
* KICK [[Matt Ward|MATT WARD]] IN THE BALLS AND KICK HIM HARD
** FIRE MATT WARD IN THE PAYCHECK AND FIRE HIM HARD

In conclusion, '''FUCK YOU GAMES WORKSHOP!!!'''

=See Also=
* [[Rage]]
* [[Casting]]
* [[Heresy]]
* [[Proxy]]
* [[Counts As]]
* [[C.S. Goto]]
* [[Matthew Ward]]
* [[Black Library]]
* [[Citadel Miniatures]]
* [[Forge World]]
* [http://investor.games-workshop.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/01/2011-12-Press-statement.pdf Games Workshop's 2010-2011 Profit Margins. For those with eyes to see.] As you can see, they made profits across the board.

[[Category:Warhammer 40,000]][[Category:Publishers]]