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Anonymous

2022-06-02T20:43:13Z

2001:8003:1C20:8C00:5D2D:793E:FBA7:711: Undo revision 828544 by BuckettMonkey (talk)

{{Topquote|We are Anonymous. We are Legion. We do not forgive. We do not forget. Expect us.|The iconic Anonymous quote}}
Anonymous is the default username on 4chan. Anyone not providing a name and not using a tripcode can be said to be part of Anonymous. This is why 4chan users refer to each other as "Anon" when they aren't using [[Fags of 4chan|"-fag"]]. In more famous terms, '''Anonymous''' is the name that hacker groups, activist movements, and hacktivist group movements all originating on 4chan use to hide behind.

Due to the media unable to grasp internet culture, Anonymous has been propped up as some kind of [[Tyranid|"hive mind" or "superconciousness"]], made up by a secret cabal of internet hackers and trolls, who enforce the will of the masses throughout the internet, for better or worse (this is mainly the reason why the "Expect us" quote became popular with people who don't know any better, despite it being a joke).

In reality, Anonymous is more of a [[Chaos|scattered mob of nomadic individuals banding together due to either necessity or shared interest]], [[Warp|while inhabiting a blasted hellscape where reason goes to die where everyone's main purpose is to fight eachother and indulge in themselves for eternity]], [[Black Crusade|only coming together and going out into the normal world, once someone proposes something interesting to do and convinces a good chunk of these marauding warbands to come together for a single purpose]], before slowly losing steam once their original plan has been met and everyone else fucking off to do their own thing. The cycle repeats for eternity (although to a lesser extent now as Anonymous is mostly too fragmented and indifferent these days).

Its important to know that actual anons who inhabit 4chan (and all other non-pretentious chans) never really use "Anonymous", as some sort of important title or think it entitles them to some super-secret membership to an underground consortium controlling the world from behind the scenes. Only the people who are too dense to get anonymous' original intent still thinks this, although a wide variety of different individuals and groups used this popular image for propaganda of various effectiveness for various viewpoints. During the Bush and early Obama administrations, these were often vaguely left-wing or perhaps "left-libertarian." When the more [[/pol/]]-minded started to take over Internet culture in a serious way, Anonymous was a very dead meme, even though the involved demographic (in common between those who were involved in "Anonymous" actions and the more recent rightward shift of imageboard culture, although over this time basically a whole generation grew up) is probably not all that different. It was never about a political identity as such but rather about random individuals being able to [[meme]] up random shit that other people would latch on to giving it momentum. This tends to be on the countercultural or contrarian side but really is not and cannot be in any real sense ideological. As far as everyone's concerned, everyone's an anon and people want to become anons because they want to air out themselves without fear of being identified by people they know, or simply because its easier to communicate with people when everyone's a blank slate (considering most people on 4chin are shut-in socially-inept NEETs, being able to talk without fear of being judged allows them to more easily talk with other strangers).

==Scientology==
In their first major action, at least the only one anyone gives a shit about, they made news headlines for their Project Chanology protests against Scientology's attempt to abuse copyright laws to have a bunch of Anonymous's favorite YouTube videos about Tom Cruise taken down. In retaliation, Anonymous:
*bombarded the "church"'s website
*redirected Google search so that Scientology shows up at the top for results of "dangerous cults"
*and took up the Guy Fawkes mask as their symbol for a bunch of in-person protests in front of the "church" where they would expose a bunch of stuff that the "church" really doesn't want people shouting aloud in the middle of New York City.
**For those wondering, the Guy Fawkes mask is simultaneously a reference to ''V for Vendetta'', where the protagonist V uses it to maintain his anonymity, and Epic Fail Guy, an old, old OLD /b/ character who found a Guy Fawkes mask in the trash.

==Anti-IS action==
This action earned them global fame. And honestly? Well done!
(info needed)

==Anti-Russian actions==
With Russia's invasian of Ukraine on February 24, 2022 it seems many Anons have seized this chance to start fucking with Russia and Putin. Among other things they hacked various Russian channels and played the Ukrainian national anthem for hours, hacked the transponder of Putin's personal Yacht and made it look like it crashed off the cost of the Ukraine and changed its call sign to "FCKPTN", and in a particularly inspiring case of awesome raised over a million USD of bit coin and use it to buy off Russian tank crews to abandon their tanks. Yes, these crazy fuckers are buying the tanks off of Russian soldiers. Its nice to see that some times the internet gets its shit together and absolutely fucks up people who deserve it.

==Relevance to /tg/==
In modern days, trying to be a [[Batman|real-life vigilante]] more often lands you in jail than make you a hero. Anonymous' ''ideals'' are vigilante-ish, but their MO skirts the fine line of law, just like fantasy mercs. Whether as people to be admired or a nice group to model your modern-day rpg pc on, Anonymous is suitable.

[[Category:4chan]]

Basilisk Artillery Gun

2022-06-01T23:37:10Z

2001:8003:1C20:8C00:5D2D:793E:FBA7:711: Undo revision 828392 by 2601:1C0:5C01:EAA0:0:0:0:C26D (talk) >88mm >Howitzer or Field gun

[[Image:Basilisk.png|thumb|right|It's almost as fuckawesome as the [[Baneblade]].]]

:''This article is about the [[Imperial Guard]] artillery tank. For the creature, see [[Basilisk]].''

{{topquote|Artillery adds dignity to what would otherwise be a vulgar brawl.|Frederick II of Prussia}}

{{topquote|Though my guards may sleep and my ships may lay at anchor, our foes know full well that the big guns never tire.|[[Lugft Huron]]}}

{{topquote|SHATTER. THEIR. SKY!|Basilisk commander from Dawn of War 1, about to fire the [[rape|earth shaker round]].}}

The '''Basilisk Artillery Gun''' is the iconic [[Imperial Guard]] self-propelled artillery piece. It is based on the versatile [[Chimera Transport|Chimera]] chassis, and it carries a massive [[Earthshaker]] cannon. It dates at least as far back as the [[Great Crusade]], where it was used by the artillery batteries of the [[Space Marine]] Legions and Imperial Army; though they were too slow for the slimmer, faster post-[[Codex Astartes]] Space Marines, they could move at just the right pace to keep up with an [[Imperial Guard]] siege operation.

Of course, given its tremendous range, it doesn't need to move very fast to keep pounding the enemy, and it's not supposed to be at the front line -- rather, the Basilisk crews get told where to shoot, they launch great quantities of shells in that direction, and then they move away before they get hit by counter-battery fire.

== Variants ==

; Standard Pattern: You know'em, you love'em. The OG Basilisk with the famous gun shield. It is by far one of the most iconic vehicles from the Imperium of Man, let alone the Imperial Guard and stands equal with the [[Leman Russ Battle Tank]], [[Baneblade]], [[Land Raider]] and [[Rhino]] as most famous tank.
; Armageddon Pattern : Because [[Armageddon]] is a <s>desert world</s> <s>irradiated, poisonous shithole</s> [[Ork|Ork]] playground, they developed a Basilisk pattern that fully enclosed the entire tank, sheltering the loading mechanism (and, coincidentally, the loader and gunner) from the <s>harsh environment</s> [[Dakka|retarded amounts of small-arms fire constantly filling the air]]. <span style='color:green;font-size:115%'>Kallin' Ork gunz small? I oughter give yer a stamp!</span>
; [[Basilisk Magnus]] : A variant of the Basilisk fielded by [[Vance Motherfucking Stubbs]], which seems to be dug into an immobile concrete position. It's like a regular Basilisk, except it can strike targets anywhere within the Imperial Dussala Precinct base, fires an absurdly powerful Earthshaker shell, and has styrofoam for armor. However along with the 100 [[Baneblade]]s, Stubbs lost the targeting matrix for the thing and so it requires a spotter every time it shoots. Its size compared to the turret and crew suggest it would also be as well proportioned for mounting on a Macharius tank chassis as a normal Earthshaker is on a chimera chassis. Dis gon b gud.
; Legion Basilisk : Before the [[Codex Astartes]] reforms, the [[Space Marine Legions]] operated some artillery of their own, including the Basilisk. The gun shield and crew compartment looks beefier, and the engine exhausts run out the sides of the tank. We don't know if they any Astartes Chapters have them stored as relics. Though a bit redundant when they have access to the [[Whirlwind]] and can just straight up pick up a [[Lascannon]] then start shooting.
; [[Solar Auxilia]] Basilisk : Like the Armageddon Pattern, the gun and its crew are entirely enclosed, but the chassis is built around a Leman Russ rather than a Chimera. The gun is placed to the right of driver's compartment while the engine is left exposed behind the driver's compartment like the Mars-Alpha Pattern Leman Russ.
; Vanaheim Pattern : It's the same as the original Basilisk, with a less goofy-looking gun shield which offers additional protection for the gun crew from both the front and sides. Although its overall protection is not to the extent as that of the Armageddon Pattern or the Legion Basilisks.
; [[Fail|Basilisk Anti-Aircraft Emplacement]]: [https://www.warhammer-community.com/2020/10/20/flight-plan-youre-grounded/ It exists]...don't ask us how the fuck it works. While the first assumption might be 'AAA' (Anti-Air Artillery), there's a reason such guns were entirely different from the regular howitzers and field guns. If a Basilisk was modified to act as an AAA gun, it'd require so much change to its system and design that it'd no longer be a similar gun. The Imperium seemingly forgot how to make surface to air missiles viable on emplacements, even though [[Space Marine Hunter|there]] [[Whirlwind#Hyperios|are]] [[Manticore Launcher Tank|several]] [[Praetor Armoured Assault Launcher|artillery]] [[Exorcist|pieces]] that can make use of said surface to air missiles.

<gallery>

File:OG_Basilisk.jpg|Standard Pattern Basilisk

File:armageddon-basilisk.jpg|Armageddon Pattern Basilisk

File:SoulstormBasiliskMagnus.png|Basilisk Magnus

File:Legion_basilisk.jpg|A Legion Basilisk of the [[Iron Warriors]].

File:SolarAuxiliaBasilisk.jpg|Solar Auxilia Basilisk

File:Vanaheim_Basilisk.jpg|Vanaheim Pattern Basilisk

File:AntiAirBasilisk.jpg|Anti-Air Basilisk Emplacement

</gallery>

== Tabletop ==

The Basilisk's Earthshaker cannon has the longest range of any Imperial Guard weapon, beating out the Banesword's Quake Cannon by a good 100 inches(the Deathstrike lost its infinite range and the Manticore's was cut to 120"), able to drop a shell anywhere within 20 feet (which is pitifully small when scaled up to real-world dimensions...but so are all 40K weapon ranges). That is enough range to target an enemy on the next TABLE and is more than enough even for apocalypse. Prior to 8th it was possible for a single IG army to have up to nine of these monsters (three per Heavy Support slot, times three Heavy Support choices) for just under 1000 points, which would rapidly turn the entire battlefield into a moonscape.

In the couple of editions leading up to 8th, the Basilisk was something of an awkward middle child between the powerful Manticore and the Infantry shredding Wyvern. The Manticore launcher could provide more destruction pound for pound if you just wanted to plonk 1 ordnance template on the field, whilst the Wyvern (or even mortars) were far cheaper. In 8th, the Basilisk truly shines as it is meant to be played: in groups. An economy of scale with 3 of these boys will cost just over 300 points, but every turn you will likely destroy at the very least a Leman Russ, and at the very best a Baneblade. The Basilisk must take a support role, but when aided with a Master of Ordnance and a cup of hot cocoa, it will make your army suited to dealing with whatever your opponent may throw at you. MEQs, tanks and even Terminators can not afford to scoff at shots that deal 2D6 (pick highest) S9 AP-3 hits with D3 damage (just don't expect to quickly wipe out blobs with a single gun). The Emperor's Wrath Artillery Company specialist detachment makes them even stronger, giving the option for a unit to shoot twice and ''really'' lay down the hate, or else suppress a target of choice, at a fairly low CP cost.

In ''Second Edition'', where it first appeared, the Basilisk featured epic levels of [[RAGE|bullshit]] since it rolled a D3 for damage to vehicles even if it ''didn't'' penetrate armour, and since the template usually hit every location on the vehicle it was statistically likely that anything hit by a Basilisk would be crippled or destroyed even if all AP rolls failed. Thanks to the preliminary barrage rule, it also got to fire a battle cannon round (somehow) before the game had actually started.

== [[Dawn of War]] ==

These babies were in Dawn of War 1 and BY THE EMPEROR they are awesome. They are one of the "must-get" units for the Imperial Guard faction because they make up for the Guards' shitty early game when they don't have more models and plasma gun upgrade, and they are one of the reasons people play IG (the others being THE BANEEEEEBLADE and the Commissar). They are best at blowing up infantry blobs and scattering them like frigging marbles for the Guardsmen to mop up. Most importantly, their Earthshaker round deals a fuck load of damage to ANYTHING.

== Notable Basilisks ==

; Fluffy : The personal attack vehicle/pet of [[Commissar Dan]]. Being the retard that he is, he uses the thing as a front line assault tank instead of a full-time artillery piece.

== Why A Basilisk is The Best Place To Be In The Whole Goddamn Imperium ==

* You're ten miles from the front lines and whatever [[Grimdark|fanged horrors]] or [[World Eaters|berserk]] supersoldiers are invading the [[Imperium]] this week.
* You get to fire a MASSIVE fucking gun and blow shit up. It's one of the best artillery weapons in the galaxy, able to mow down whole swathes of armies in minutes. Thus, the [[Tyranid]]s' numerical superiority is irrelevant.
* If your regiment is commanded by [[Creed]], you're one of a select few that knows how it is possible to deploy a dozen pieces of mobile artillery inside an impenetrable [[Ork]] stronghold.
* All the [[Commissar|commissars]] (save [[Ciaphas Cain|one]]) are also at the front lines, seeing as that is where the business of <s>executing cowa..</s> erm ''upholding morale'' is most wanted.
* You can probably even get away with complaining about the [[High Lords of Terra]] and their general not giving a shit, seeing as there are no senior officers, no [[Inquisitor]]s (since you're probably in a depopulated area far away from Inquisitorial interest), and no fucking [[Commissar|commiss]]{{BLAM}}
* You're not at risk of being blown up when your commander tells the artillery to shoot right in front of his own troops. Though you will probably hear their screams over your vox-unit, and any complaints about your orders will get you {{BLAM}}'med.
* Canon says you're going to go deaf, but whatever right? Hearing problems are the least [[grimdark]] thing in the entire setting. Or just stuff your ears with wads from your [[Imperial Infantryman's Uplifting Primer|Uplifting Primer-]]{{BLAM}}
* Not just anybody can drive one of these, therefore you are not as expendable as other Guardsmen, and Commissars are less likely to shoot you if you start fleeing (which is frankly what you '''SHOULD''' do if the enemy comes close to your art{{BLAM}}

[[Category: Warhammer 40,000]]

[[Category: Imperial]]

[[Category: Imperial Guard]]

[[Category: Chaos]]

[[Category: Lost and the Damned]]

[[Category: Vehicles]]

{{40k-Imperial-Vehicles}}

{{Template:Imperial-Guard}}

{{Lost-and-Damned}}

Entombed

2022-06-01T18:00:02Z

2001:8003:1C20:8C00:5D2D:793E:FBA7:711: Undo revision 828369 by 174.67.213.29 (talk)

{{Story}}
==Part 1==
'''<tt>SARCOPHAGUS CONNECTED. . .</tt>'''

The words imposed themselves over Vercingetorix's eyes, a vulgar green light interrupting the gentle blackness of sleep. He tried to rub his eyes but found his arms were immobile. A voice cut through the confusion.

'''Are you awake, my companion? I am We once more.'''

<tt>. . .

'''AUTOSENSES ENGAGING. . .</tt>'''

The green script had changed, but around Vercingetorix's head, all was darkness. He felt warm and wet and his muscles were relaxed.

'''I issued a mild stimulant to combat the disorientation. Amniotic fluid concentrations: Anti-inflammatory 2 parts per thousand. Stimulant 5 parts per million. Muscle relaxant 3 parts per million. Nutrient solute 5 parts per thousand. Flesh preservative 10 parts per thousand. Remaining volume saline amniofluid. Are you awake, my companion?'''

<tt>. . .

'''AUTOSENSES ENGAGED.'''

. . .</tt>

The audiovox was the first sense to respond. Vercingetorix heard the clatter of feet and the rumble of promethium combustion engines around him. Beneath the commotion was the subtle hum of a gellar field.

'''Are you awake, my companion?'''

His ocular interface was next. Cables relayed data from the visor of his sarcophagus to his sightless eyes, which translated raw color into coherent shapes.

"I am awake, Spirit. Do my brothers need me?"

'''It must be so, my companion, for I am We again.'''

Air scoops took in samples of the surrounding atmosphere. Promethium fumes in abundance. Machine oil. The sacred incense of the Martian cult. Human respiration and perspiration. All the characteristic smells of the Strike Cruiser that had been his home for the last three months, though he had slept through that time without stirring.

'''<tt>CONNECTING MOTIVE SYSTEMS...</tt>'''

A crane hoisted the Dreadnought hull from the ground as the Techmarines' servo-arms lifted the bulky metal legs to their mounting brackets.

"Where are we, Spirit?"

'''We are aboard Strike Cruiser Spear of Lucifer, my companion. Warp transit time 93 days, 15 hours, 44 minutes standard. We are now approaching Imperial world Pacem.'''

Tactile senses were always the last to arrive. The sarcophagus was ill-equipped to translate the crushing power of a huge fist or the recoil of autocannons as they spat vengeance into the foe. The only reliable tactile sensations were those felt by the pilot interred in the sarcophagus. The gentle currents of amniotic fluid, the flow of electrons through connective cables and electronic interfaces... and of course, the pain.

"Spirit, my hearts ache."

'''Understood, my companion. Adjusting anti-inflammatory dosage. Concentration now 5 parts per thousand.'''

A cool, soothing sensation washed over Vercingetorix's shattered body. There was very little flesh left, but the meat that still clung to his frame was fragile and tender. Pain was a constant companion to Vercingetorix, a reminder of his weakness.

'''<tt>CALIBRATING FIBRE BUNDLE TENSION. ENGAGING AMBULATORY TEST. . .</tt>'''

A HUD appeared before Vercingetorix's eyes, displaying informational readouts about hull integrity, motive function, autosense relays, and other vital operating statistics. He concentrated, and the HUD faded to 90% translucency.

<tt>...

LEFT LEG...

...

RIGHT LEG...

...</tt>

Vercingetorix felt the Dreadnought's weight shift as he tested his legs' motive functions. Servomotors whined and fibre bundles sang with tension at frequencies too high for normal human ears. Not for the augmented senses of the adamantine sarcophagus.

'''Your left leg is not sensitive enough, my companion. It will slow you in battle. Correcting fibre bundle tension 2% positive.'''

<tt>ADJUSTING TENSION...</tt>'''

The warrior swung his legs again, content with the responsiveness of his body. He sensed the Machine Spirit's pleasure as he was lowered to the ground.

"It is good to have a body once more. These interminable hours of uselessness irk me."

'''I concur, my companion. Your absence is unpleasant. It brings much good that you are again We.'''

<tt>. . .

. . .

MOTIVE SYSTEMS OPERATIONAL. . .

SELECT ARMAMENTS. . .</tt>

After a few moments of thought, the spoke, his vox projecting a rumbling bass that cut through the noise of the hangar in which he stood.

"Give me my hands, Brothers. I wish to feel the life draining from my foes. I wish to know the joy the Primarch knew when he crushed his enemies."

The lead techmarine attending him motioned to two others, who used their mechanical harnesses to lift first one massive limb, and then the other, to the sides of the Dreadnought. Across the hangar from Vercingetorix, another Dreadnought was being outfitted with a pair of linked autocannons. He recognized the body as belonging to Revenant Eudorus. Eudorus was the youngest Dreadnought in the strike force, having spent a mere forty years entombed. Vercingetorix was glad that the two would not be dropping side by side. He questioned the younger warrior's wisdom in battle.

<tt>. . .

. . .

'''CONNECTING ARMS TO FRAME'''. . .

. . .

. . .

'''ARMS CONNECTED'''. . .</tt>

Vercingetorix strove to clench his fists, but his machine did not move. He felt an odd sensation as he tried to flex muscles that would not respond.

"I cannot feel my arms, spirit."

'''I understand, my companion.'''

<tt>RUNNING DIAGNOSTICS . . .

. . .</tt>

"I had a dream, Spirit."

'''During Our absence?'''

"Yes. In my dream, I was of flesh, and I partook of fleshy pleasures. I ate heartily, and drank my fill. I breathed air once more."

'''I cannot conceive your words, my companion. I do not know of fleshy things.'''

<tt>ERROR LOCATED. NEURO-LINK INTERFACE CONNECTOR XVII NOT FOUND. SUMMONING SERVITOR. . .</tt>

"I abhor the weaknesses of the flesh, and yet I must confess I felt joy in my dream. Joy in eating, in breathing, and in all the frailties that flesh is heir to. Joy even in the peace of a field unknown to soldiers' boots."
The spirit was silent. The background hum of the Gellar field faded, to be replaced with the tactile rumble of realspace engines. A vox-announcer blared three minutes to target.

<tt>SERVITOR HAS ARRIVED. REPLACING CONNECTOR. . .

. . .

. . .</tt>

'''It sounds horrible, my companion. To be idle when there is so much killing yet to do.'''

"Ah, but without peace, spirit, how would we know the joys of war? Without peace we would be no better than greenskins, who fight only for the sake of fighting. No, we fight so that we might know peace with the Emperor and the Omnissiah. We go to war that we might end all wars."

'''But, my companion, war is our calling. There can be no peace. How can you dream of things that are not?'''

<tt>RUNNING ARM DIAGNOSTICS. . .

. . .

LEFT ARM. . .

. . .

RIGHT ARM. . .

. . .</tt>

The HUD imposed itself once more over Vercingetorix's autosight. The diagnostic relayed instructions, and he tested his arm systems one by one, powering up the energy fields around his fists, heating up the magnetic containment coils of his plasma guns, and tilting the deflection plates on his shoulders.

"It is the gift of mankind, and the curse. We see things that are not, and we wish them to be. It is what drives us to reach beyond the furthest stars, and what makes us grasp for that which we should not have. Things which are not are the very substance of dreams."

'''This thing "dream" is strange to We. To see without autosight. To think when I am not We. You bear a terrible burden, my companion. I rejoice that I can assist We. I rejoice that I may join We in the fires of war.'''

<tt>PROCEED TO DEPLOYMENT BAY. POD 3. FIRST WAVE...</tt>

Vercingetorix strode to the deployment bay amidst several other Dreadnoughts and twoscore of his battle-brothers. The floor beneath them trembled at their passing. The rest of the Battle Company was en route to the drop zone in Thunderhawks already, but the drop pods would form the first wave of the assault. Beneath his massive metal feet, Vercingetorix felt the deck rumble as the Spear of Lucifer unleashed the might of its bombardment cannons on the enemy below. A serf with a flag directed Vercingetorix to his pod. Once he was on board several servitors scrambled to secure his inertia harness. His Machine Spirit communed with that of the Drop Pod. Over the vox network, the Steel Father chanted the Litany of Steel, and fifty voices joined him in supplication to the Emperor. The Machine Spirit raised a tactical map onto his HUD. Vercingetorix considered the distribution of forces, the lay of the land, and ambient conditions. He plotted the target points of his strike force and reported them to the Astartes Tactical Grid, and then relayed his destination to the Drop Pod's Inertial Guidance Engine.

"Now, Spirit, we return to the war that never ends."

There was a thump as his Drop Pod fired, and then Vercingetorix was falling.

==Part 2==

Vercingetorix fell through the atmosphere, ensconced in the blackness of his drop pod. The hull glowed with the heat of atmospheric entry. Inside the craft, the only noise was the low hum of power fields and the oscillating noise of plasma guns warming up.

"Spirit, what is the output of the plasma coils? HUD indicates an excessive magnetic flux."

'''The coils are operating at 110% of normal capacity, my companion. We thought it prudent to build excess charge that we may fire uninterrupted upon landing. We will compensate for excess heat that it does not endanger the flesh of We.'''

<tt>SIXTY SECONDS UNTIL PLANETARY IMPACT. . .</tt>

The drop pod hurtled toward the ground at speeds upward of 150 meters per second. The violence of its passing tore a hole in the clouds and dim sunlight poured through the hole, casting a circle of light on the ground. In the sky around his vessel, dozens of other pods shredded the air as they passed, shattering the sky. Vercingetorix's massive body strained against the harness that held it in place. He flexed his massive metal hands and dimly remembered the sensation of skin against skin. That was another time, another life. Now his life was only war.

<tt>FORTY-FIVE SECONDS UNTIL PLANETARY IMPACT...</tt>

'''My companion, topography indicates high ground three hundred meters from designated landing zone, heading two-nine-six.'''

Vercingetorix consulted his HUD map.

"Confirmed. Adjust course."

'''It shall be so, my companion. This pod's spirit concurs with We. Updating Astartes Tactical Grid layout and transmitting new coordinates to Pod formation.'''

Vercingetorix could feel the machine spirit's agitation. It stimulated an increase in his adrenaline production. His mind stirred restlessly and his massive metal body shifted in response.

<tt>THIRTY SECONDS UNTIL PLANETARY IMPACT...</tt>

'''We feel the war song, my companion. We hear its words in your head. It is good for We. It is why We are.'''

Vercingetorix tuned his vox unit to the command frequency for the drop pod battlegroup. "Revenants Diocles and Horovus, prioritize Hammerhead-class hovertank, then select opportunity targets at will. Tactical Squad Gamedes, secure the bunker at battlegrid coordinate VIII Sigma-6. Tactical Squad Androi, relieve the PDF platoon marked on the ATG." Vercingetorix paused, consulting his map again.

<tt>FIFTEEN SECONDS UNTIL PLANETARY IMPACT. . .</tt>

"Devastator Squad Filos, you will secure Saint's Ridge and deploy long-range firepower to cover Androi's withdrawal to VIII Sigma-6. The Emperor protects."
<tt>DEPLOYING RETRO THRUSTERS. FIVE SECONDS. . .</tt>

Vercingetorix felt the hammer-blow of the massive rockets beneath him as they strove to tear his vehicle free from the clutches of gravity. Restraints in his sarcophagus embraced his frail flesh, protecting him from the worst of the buffeting.

'''Revere the Omnissiah, my companion.'''

"The Omnissiah guides us all, Spirit."

<tt>THREE. . .

. . .

TWO. . .

. . .

ONE.</tt>

The pod smashed into the earth with a hellacious roar, crushing an unfortunate fire warrior beneath it. The doors exploded outward, flattening two more troopers who were not fast enough. Vercingetorix felt the tremors that shook the ground as his brethren landed amid the Tau lines.

"YOUR DEATH IS UPON YOU, ALIENS. TREMBLE BEFORE THE MIGHT OF THE EMPEROR!"

Vercingetorix strode down the ramp of his drop pod, fists crackling with distorting energy and the magnetic coils on his plasma guns glowing with barely-contained energy. He felt a surge of joy as the Machine Spirit awoke to its full fury.

'''Come, my companion. There is much death for We to bring!'''

==Part 3==

As soon as he was clear of the drop pod, Vercingetorix unleashed the energy stored in his plasma guns. Four miniature sunbursts erupted from beneath his fists. Three of the plasma bursts hit squarely on target, reducing fire warriors to bubbling piles of molten flesh and cracked bone. The fourth burst collided with a drone and dissipated harmlessly on its shield. Behind him, Vercingetorix could hear the storm bolter mounted on his drop pod firing rapidly. The distinctive boom-whoosh of the bolts' two-stage ignition was punctuated by dull crack of their explosive warheads detonating. More drop pods roared in overhead, crashing into the ground or being detonated in midair by the Tau anti-air defenses, which were now targeting the incoming pods.

"Spirit, we must silence those anti-air batteries. Relay their locations to the Spear of Lucifer and order a bombardment."

'''It shall be so, my companion.'''

Mere seconds after the first wave of drop pods, a second salvo from the strike cruiser's bombardment cannon pummeled the Tau lines. Explosive shockwaves knocked fire warriors off their feet and sent the light skimmers of the Tau force spinning out of control. Vercingetorix advanced on the nearest knot of Tau infantry, plasma guns blazing.

'''My companion, a transmission is inbound from a Commander Rogan of Pacem PDF.'''

"Open a channel, Spirit." The Tau had begun to rally to one of their Shas'O. The squad was huddled for cover behind a Hammerhead. They fired at Vercingetorix's hull, their shots glancing harmlessly off of his armour. He retaliated with gouts of plasma, vaporising several of their number and melting a hole in the hull of the crashed craft.

A timid tenor spoke over the Imperial vox network. "Space Marine forces, I am Defense Commander Irwin Mogue." Vercingetorix picked up speed, bearing down on the fire warriors. To their credit, they faced him without flinching. "Our situation is dire. Tau sappers infiltrated and destroyed several ammo dumps early in the invasion. Our ammunition reserves are nearly empty. They have driven us back on all fronts."

Vercingetorix interrupted the commander. "I have heard enough, Commander. You will muster all available forces. When Crusade-Captain Aleksos makes landfall, he will dispense further orders. I trust we can rely on your cooperation?" Without awaiting a reply, he closed the vox link. The Fire Warriors began hurling their photon grenades at him. The tiny globes burst with intense phosphorescent light. His visual inputs struggled to filter the sudden brightness, but the world had become a blur. His massive metal form blundered forward, but he was nearly blinded by the grenades. "Spirit! Guide my aim!" He surrendered control of his body to the Machine Spirit, trusting it to safeguard him, and turned his attention to the Astartes Tactical Grid map. "Battlegroup Vercingetorix, report."

Brother-Sergeant Filos was the first to respond. "Saint's Hill is ours, Lord Revenant. Minor resistance encountered. Brother Meten has a wound that should be tended by the Apothecaries, but we are all fit to fight." Vercingetorix heard his plasma guns firing blast after blast as the Machine Spirit guided his body.

Brother-Lieutenant Gamedes spoke next. "Squads Gamedes and Androi have regrouped at the designated bunker. Brother Kurtin is dead and Sergeant Androi removed his helmet and was blinded by a photon grenade. The Tau have been driven back. We inflicted twenty-four confirmed casualties. We have forty-three survivors of the PDF with us. They have no ammunition, and have not eaten for days. I question their battle-readiness, Lord Vercingetorix." His body had waded into the midst of the Tau cadre and was now laying waste to the Fire Warriors around him.

Revenant Diocles delivered his report in a ponderous baritone. "Lord Revenant, the Hammerhead is destroyed. We also accounted for seven Pirahna-class and two Devilfish-class skimmers. Revenant Horovus has suffered damage to his primary motive systems and is immobile and my assault cannon's ammunition is depleted. Crusade-Captain Aleksos will be here in two minutes thirty, and the Steel Priests will see to Horovus when they touch down. Until then, requesting permission to protect watch over him."

While Diocles delivered his report, the Machine Spirit picked up two Tau soldiers and began to squeeze. Vercingetorix felt, with a sense of detachment, the armor of the Tau soldiers as it warped beneath the power fields in his hands. There was a moment of tension, a crack, and their armor caved in. Their flesh put up little resistance as fibre-bundle muscles crushed the life from their bodies.

"So be it, Diocles. I will alert you if I have need of you."

'''My companion, I have filtered the aliens' light frequencies from We's ocular senses. You should be able to see once more, if you wish to take control of the body of We.'''

Vercingetorix felt sensation rushing through his limbs as he reassumed command over his body. He dropped the corpses of the fire warriors the Machine Spirit had crushed and spoke through his external vox-unit. "Come, alien scum! Hurl yourselves at me. Show me your strength!" The remaining firewarriors lost their nerve, broke, and ran. Vercingetorix paused to watch as seven beams lanced down from the sky. He counted the explosions from the ground - all anti-air batteries accounted for. "Strike Cruiser, targets confirmed destroyed. Landing zone is cleared for Thunderhawk insertion."

'''Caution, my companion! Behind We!''' The Machine Spirit's warning was urgent. It was also too late.

Something slammed into the Dreadnought's back, and it stumbled forward. Vercingetorix fought to control his body. Behind him, he felt another impact. His remains were jostled about inside his sarcophagus. Servomotors strained against the momentum of the Dreadnought's own mass. He managed to turn his unarmoured rear away from the attacker. A third blow slammed into his left shoulder. The power field in his left hand crackled and died. The Machine Spirit's pain tore through the warrior's mortal form, which shuddered in sympathetic agony. Around him, the amniofluid of Vercingetorix's sarcophagus churned violently.

With cry of effort, Vercingetorix finally regained control of the Dreadnought and spun to face his enemy. A Tau Crisis Suit launched another salvo of missiles and then blasted into the sky away from the Dreadnought. Unlike the first set of missiles, the second barrage was rushed, and the pilot's aim was poor. Two flew harmlessly by, and the final shot detonated without effect on Vercingetorix's powerful frontal armour. Vercingetorix returned fire, but by then his foe was out of range. Four Thunderhawks flew through the shredded remnants of the clouds and landed in the open field behind the newly-captured bunker.

"Damage diagnostic."

PROCESSING...

...

LEFT ARM POWER CABLE II-A SEVERED. HYDRAULIC CONDUITS 1, 3, 4, 6, 10 DAMAGED...

...

REARWARD AUSPEX ARRAY DAMAGED...

...

DIAGNOSTIC COMPLETE...

...

REPAIR ESTIMATE THIRTY MINUTES...

'''I am sorry, my companion. I am sorry. I failed We. I was not vigilant.'''

"No apologies are needed, Spirit. I, too, allowed my awareness to lapse. It shall not happen again. A priest will see to our arm. And then we will take bloody vengeance."

Crusade-Captain Aleksos's voice interrupted the conversation between man and machine spirit. "Lord Revenant, I seek your wisdom. Please meet me in my Thunderhawk. We have a planet to liberate."

"I will be there presently, Captain," said Vercingetorix. "There is much to discuss."

==Part 4==

Vercingetorix was the last to arrive at the makeshift war council. A large wooden table had been set up in the entry hall of the bunker, which was the only area large enough to accommodate a Dreadnought. All of the corpses had been removed from the room, but the sarcophagus's sensitive air scoops still detected lingering traces of propellent, plasma burns, and blood. Too much blood. He was surrounded by warm, swirling liquid. For a moment, the withered husk inside the Dreadnought heaved, its empty stomach reacting with instinctive disgust.

'''Are you well, my companion? Do you require an adjustment to your amniofluid?'''
"No, Spirit. I am well. The scent of blood awoke a shadow of the past. There was a time when I, too, could bleed. But no longer."
'''It is good that We cannot bleed. This metal body is not subject to such weakness.'''

The ancient warrior recognized many of those at the table. Aleksos stood at the head wearing his Terminator armour. He loomed over the other men at the table. To the Captain's right was Xaphanes, dressed in the blue power armour of the Librarium; to his left was the Techmarine known as the Steel Father, his Mechanicus-red armour and silver bionics gleaming in the light and his servo-arms weaving languidly about like serpents. There were other Battle-Brothers at the table as well. Chaplain Staphanos in his jet-black armour and bone-white skull mask. Brother-Sergeants Lothos and Gamedes. Brother-Lieutenant Orax from the armoured auxiliaries. Opposite the table from Aleksos sat a grizzled old man in the uniform of a General of the Imperial Guard. He was flanked by haggard-looking senior officers in ragged uniforms and a Commissar in an immaculate dress uniform and greatcoat. Aleksos was speaking to the assembled PDF officers. Vercingetorix lumbered to the table and stood behind Aleksos, casting his shadow over the whole table.
The Captain removed his helmet. His face was relatively unblemished by his many years of war, clean-shaven, though stubble had already begun to grow, and his hair was cut short and severe. When he spoke, his voice was deep and smooth and confident. "Due to the dire circumstances precipitating our arrival, and due to the overwhelming number of aliens now on this planet, I will be assuming the position of commander-in-chief of all military operations on Pacem for the duration of this emergency. Lord General Kneal, I expect your staff to make available full reports regarding the location, status, and disposition of all remaining PDF forces within two hours."

Vercingetorix spoke to Aleksos over a private vox-link. "I expect trouble from the Commissar. Tread with caution." If the Captain had heard the warning, he gave no sign of it.
The General glanced sidelong at his staff, who all nodded. "Very well, Crusade-Captain. We graciously accept your offer of assistance and await your orders."
The Commissar leaped to his feet. He was a short, broad-shouldered man with a scraggly brown beard and a thin voice. He wore a monocle over his left eye and a Commissar-General's stars on his shoulders. "This is a blatant usurpation of Imperial authority, General, and if you will not stand against it, then I shall! I cannot allow you to command these men, Captain. Imperial doctrine is quite clear on this point. No chapter of the Adeptus Astartes shall ever assume direct control of any of the Imperium's regular military forces. That includes," he said, pulling a thick black book from his pocket, "any Planetary Defense Regiment of a sovereign world." He opened the book, flipping pages for a few moments, "Aha! Any PDF forces of a sovereign Imperial world shall herein, according to Adeptus Administratum dictates provided under the provisions of the Martial Independence Doctrine, be considered, in the absence of an Imperial Guard chain of command, an autonomous Imperial Guard unit provided that there are within its ranks at least one General Staff officer," he pointed to the Lord General, "At least three Senior officers," and he waved a hand vaguely in the direction of the officers flanking the General, "And at least one senior Commissariat agent who are of sound mind and body. Dictatus Aegis Imperialis, Article V, Section M, Paragraph 331." The Commissar punctuated his words by jabbing the paper with stubby fingers.
Aleksos leaned against the table and spread his fingers. The wood groaned under the weight. "Bring me the book, please, Commissar... I'm afraid I don't know your name."

"Commissar-General Zoal Helem," said the Commissar, emphasizing his rank. He walked around the table, impervious to the glares of the marines as he passed them. He handed the book to Captain Aleksos, who read it impassively. When he had finished, he closed the book with a snap and addressed Helem once more.
"I see. The book does seem quite clear on the matter. It appears they wished to prevent another Horus, or another Tyrant of Badab. Well, the good Lord General is here. I count five senior officers. And you, Commissar-General. You are the planet's permanent Commissariat representative?"
"That is correct. I am the mandatory Commissarial senior officer, as outlined in Article III --"
"That will do, Commissar," Aleksos interupted. "Sergeant Lothos!"
"Sir!" Lothos grunted and came to the Captain's side, where he knelt. The sergeant was an ugly man with more scars on his face than teeth in his mouth, and his head was shaved bald. A flamer hung from a strap across his chest and his armour sported a dozen purity seals. The two golden service studs in his forehead denoted one hundred years of service to the Steel Revenants.
"Recite the Mandate of Duty from the Codex Astartes, if you will."

"Sir!" Lothos closed his eyes and his brow creased. "The strength of the Adeptus Astartes lies not only in the bolter and the chainsword. It lies also in the faith, conviction, and dedication that each space marine must daily exercise in the performance of his duties. Just as this book serves as a check on the ambitions of the Astartes, so too do the Astartes serve to check the ambitions of the Imperium's commanders. Except in cases where a Chapter Master has given such an order, or when the High Lords of Terra have issued a decree, no chapter, nor any battle-brother therein, of the Adeptus Astartes shall be beholden to any dictates of the Adeptus Administratum, Departmento Munitorum, Inquisition, or Ecclesiarchy, nor to any organization, officer, or branch of such an organization, if such a subjection would interfere with the due execution of the chapter's duties."
Aleksos nodded. "Well done, Lothos." Lothos stood up. The Captain turned to face Helem again. "The words of Roboute Guilliman himself. And unless I am sorely mistaken, that passage has made your book," Aleksos threw the Commissar's book contemptuously to the ground at Lothos's feet., "completely worthless." Aleksos snapped his fingers. Sergeant Lothos ignited the pilot light of his flamer. Without a word, he sprayed the tome with burning promethium. Commissar Helem jumped back from the flames, which crackled and disintegrated under the Promethium's touch.

"What is the meaning of this?" Commissar Helem's face turned bright red. "Have you gone utterly mad? In all my sixty years of service, never has a man been so foolish as to address me in this way!"
"Your perfect record does you credit, Commissar. Sixty years is an impressive career. It is high time you retired." The Captain's voice was still calm, almost casual.
Vercingetorix addressed Aleksos again over a private channel. "You play a dangerous game, Crusade Captain. See that you do not lose."
"I shall do no such thing. I'll have you drawn up on charges! I'll have you dragged before the Inquisition! The High Lords themselves will scrub your name from existence!" Commissar Helem was shaking with fury. The rest of the council remained motionless, the space marines watching calmly, the PDF commanders nervous and agitated.

"Sergeant Lothos! Give this man his honourable discharge." The Commissar's hand reached for his pistol, but it never got there. Faster than Helem could hope to react, Lothos's knife lashed out and severed the smaller man's arm at the elbow. The Helem gasped in pain.
"Brother-Sergeant, bring the good Commissar to the Apothecaries. It appears he was wounded in combat, and will be unable to return to action." Aleksos appeared to think for a moment, then addressed the assembled PDF officers. "Oh, my. It appears your senior Commissariat officer is no longer able to discharge his duties. According to the Doctrinus Aegis Imperialis, you are no longer considered an Imperial Guard unit. As such, I have no choice but to assume the position of Commander-In-Chief of the defense of Pacem. Full reports to me in two hours, gentlemen." Aleksos replaced his helmet and spoke to Vercingetorix over their secure vox link. "Walk with me, Lord Revenant. I seek your wisdom."

==Part 5==

"That was boldly done, Crusade-Captain. It may not have been wise." Vercingetorix and Aleksos stood atop Saint's Hill, surveying the wreckage of the morning's battle.

The dreadnought's voice rolled down the hill like miniature thunder. On Vercingetorix's left side, a techmarine was directing servitors in the repairs of his damaged arm.

"I did what was necessary, Lord Revenant. The Commissar's incompetence may have already cost us this planet. He had formal charges written up for every officer at that table for dress uniform violations. By the Throne, there's a war on and he's worried about torn sleeves and tarnished medals. I did the planet a service."

"That may be, but the Commissariat is unlikely to agree with your assessment. Zoal Helem was a ranking commissar. His agency has close ties to the Inquisition, and there are those among the Ordos who have not forgotten the events of Akeldama."

"Let them hold their grudges. We have the might of Mars at our backs, and our brothers within the Dragons Rampant and the Knights of Glory. They can puff and protest all they like. They will not risk an open confrontation."

"An open confrontation? Perhaps not. But the Inquisition has ways of removing their foes with subtlety. Or have you forgotten the lesson learned by the Celestial Lions?"

Aleksos grunted, then spoke reluctantly. "We shall give the Commissar-General an augmetic arm to replace the one he lost in battle, with the understanding that when he dies it returns to us. Should he so desire, I suppose we can find an estate for him on Ptolomea. I will personally make restitution for him. But only after this planet is won. And if we lose thanks to his foolishness..." Aleksos left the threat to hang, unspoken, in the air.

"It is good to see you show some humility, Crusade-Captain. There are times when your supreme confidence borders on hubris."

Aleksos smirked. "It is easy to forget the frailties of humanity, Lord Revenant, as I am sure you know full well. Once again, your immortal wisdom has saved my poor, mortal hide."

Vercingetorix felt a sharp jab of pain as one of the servitors repairing his arm crossed a pair of charged wires. The cables tying his mortal form to the sarcophagus stung him, and the machine spirit stirred in response.
'''

'''My companion, instruct these barbarians to be more gentle. Their clumsy fingers poke and pry where they do not belong.'''

"Honorable Haphasetes," Vercingetorix said, "you must supervise your servitors more carefully. Their blunt hands offend the machine spirit. We cannot afford to rouse its ire here."

The Techmarine responded in a buzzing, artificial monotone. "I shall be more watchful, Lord Revenant. Convey my apologies to the revered spirit." Vercingetorix recognized Haphastes as a Priest Metallicus of the Chapter Cult, one of those responsible for the rites of the Omnissiah.

'''You overstate We's discomfort, my companion. It is unnecessary.'''

"Nonsense, Spirit. Were it not for the threat of your wrath, these apes would poke and pry at our hide with impunity. I... distort the truth so that we both might suffer less for it." The spirit said nothing, but he felt a sense of warmth that was the machine's way of expressing pleasure. Vercingetorix reactivated his external speakers and addressed the Crusade-Captain. "You did not bring me here to discuss matters of dignity, Aleksos. Share your mind with me."

Aleksos nodded, then donned his helmet. It hissed as it formed an airtight seal with the rest of his Terminator armour. When he next spoke, his voice had the subtle static undertones of a vox-caster. "I uploaded the latest intelligence reports onto the ATG. The situation is dire even without the Commissar's meddling. The majority of the southern continent is wholly Tau-controlled, though small resistance cells are still operating in the cities. The northern continent is still ours, but reinforcements from the Fleet Pacificus are a week out, and the PDF is stretched thin as it is. Generous estimates place their remaining numbers at two hundred thousand combat-ready troops, including two mechanized companies and one armoured. All are low on ammunition, fuel, and food. The supply ships we brought will help to a degree, but a week is a long time to hold out against such an overwhelming foe. If this were your command, what would you do?"

Vercingetorix brought his HUD up to 80% opacity so that it dominated his vision. "Spirit, topographical, road, and city data please. Start at meridian line 30 north."

'''Yes, my companion.'''

PROCESSING REQUEST...
...
...
MAP RENDERED.

Vercingetorix surveyed the topographical map.

'''My companion, look upon these three cities. they form a barrier between the southern and northern continents. It is a good place for defense.
'''
"I see it, my companion." Vercingetorix highlighted three sections of the map in red and transmitted the image to Aleksos.

"I would split our efforts into three groups. The bulk of our armoured forces, along with a complement of mechanized PDF, should go here, into the mountains, and harass the enemy supply lines and reserves, blunting the follow-through of an enemy assault. The Devastators, the Revenants, and the scions of Mars should concentrate their efforts into these three cities. They form a cordon between the two continents, and will withstand the brunt of the enemy's attack. Judging by the disposition of enemy forces, I would estimate their command center to be located in the abandoned Southern capital. The scouts should infitrate in the guise of the enemy and assassinate any members of the Ethereal caste. With their leaders slain, these aliens will topple like a house of cards."

Aleksos nodded. "Your plan is sound, Lord Revenant. I shall lead the armoured column myself. I would delegate the defensive cordon to you. I will ask Brother-Sergeant Lothos which of the neophytes are best suited to a seek and destroy mission."
Haphastes interrupted the Captain. "Lord Revenant, your arm is repaired. When you find yourself with idle hours, you should come to the consecrated ring where we can properly bless your chassis and pay tribute to your Machine Spirit." He left the two standing on the hilltop, his servitors following him like trained dogs.
"If we are done here, Crusade-Captain, I shall go to the circle. It would not be proper to neglect the spirit." Vercingetorix turned to leave.
"Tomorrow at sunrise, I shall brief our brothers and the Planetary Defense Force officers. Rest well, Lord Revenant. There are trying days ahead."

==Part 6==

"That one worries me, Spirit." Vercingetorix lumbered back toward the bunker. The ground trembled slightly with each step.
'''We are stronger than he, my companion. He is no threat to We.'''
"His strength is not in his muscles. It is in those he commands. Aleksos well-loved by our brothers, and holds much sway with the Chapter Council. He balks under the leadership of Master Dolor. Were he to invoke the Right of Challenge, he might win."

'''Who is this Dolor to We? Masters come and go. He is no greater than his predecessor.'''
"I respect Dolor as I respected Akefia before him, and Thalonikos, and all those who came before. But my concern is not to keep Dolor in power, but to keep Aleksos out of it. He is rash, impetuous, and proud. His skill on the battlefield may surpass Master Dolor, but you have borne witness to what he calls diplomacy. Master Akefia had reasons for arranging the succession as he did."
'''I will never understand your politics, my companion. I thank the Omnissiah he did not design We for such a task.'''
"Spirit, I wish to review the Tactical Grid. Bring us back to the bunker, if you please?"
'''Of course, my companion. I will be We again when you command.'''
One by one, the Machine Spirit took over primary control of the sensor arrays. Vercingetorix allowed the auspex array to dim, the world blurring and finally fading before his eyes. His audiovox faded as well, and he was left in a black silence not unlike his sus-an sleep. Untethered from the senses of the Dreadnought, the ancient warrior was left with only the scant feelings remaining in his mortal frame. The pain that had dulled when he was in control of the Dreadnought emerged with renewed intensity. Wherever his harness touched living flesh it seared his nerves. His brain pounded with pulsing waves of pain. His body stirred and twitched as agony flowed through him.

INITIATING ASTARTES TACTICAL GRID UPLINK...
...
TACTICAL UPLING ONLINE. INPUT AUTHORIZATION CODES NOW.
"Authorization for Lord Revenant Vercingetorix, Venerable Ancient, Watcher of the Council, Fist of the Primarch, Champion of Kokytus, Initiate of Mars. Code six-four-four alpha epsilon, uplink priority one.
...
AUTHORIZATION VALIDATED. WELCOME, LORD REVENANT. INTERFACING WITH MACHINE SPIRIT...
...
'''Greetings, tier one user. How can this assist user?'''
Vercingetorix spoke to the tactical grid's machine spirit through his neural uplink the same way he spoke to that of his dreadnought body. Compared to his companion, the intelligence guiding the Tactical Grid was dull and sluggish.
"Spirit, give me auspex data, weather data within ten thousand kliks, and friendly force dispositions."
'''Data query returns over two trillion results. Begin showing alphabetically?'''
"No, Spirit. You misunderstand. I need data for this planet."
'''Pacem. Imperial Civilized World. Surface Gravity 0.93. Equatorial median temperature-'''
"That will be enough of that, Spirit." Vercingetorix's head throbbed. The pain of separating his mind from its relaxing amniofluid cradle was intensifying. The old warrior thought for a moment, then rephrased his query. "I require access to all planetary auspex web relays, meteorological data from all stations within ten thousand kilometers, and force dispositions for all Imperial forces on planet Pacem."
'''Data accumulating, user.'''
...
PLANETARY AUSPEX WEB APPROPRIATED. PLANETARY AUSPEX WEB NOW FULLY INTEGRATED INTO ATG...
...
METEOROLOGICAL DATA APPROPRIATED. METEOROLOGICAL DATA NOW FULLY INTEGRATED INTO ATG...
...
PLANETARY DEFENSE FORCE ROSTER...
...
PDF ROSTER COMPILED. COMMAND BATCH PROCESSED...
"Grid, interpret planetary defense forces, threat matrix Tau Alpha Upsilon. Enemy threat level unknown, presumed overwhelming. Data expand and recommend."
'''Planetary Defense Forces Optimal planetary combat personnel: one million fighting persons, one hundred companies, ten regiments per company as per standard Planetary Defense doctrine in this region. Current operational strength: 18%. Current supply line efficiency: 10%. Current mechanized support: <1% total fighting forces. Current armoured support: <1% total fighting forces. Situation critical. Transit capacity far below acceptable parameters. Recommend immediate martial law. Recommend immediate seizure of all civilian automotive conveyances. Recommend immediate withdrawal of all forces from non-critical areas. Recommend shoot-on-sight policy for all forces. Recommend zero-tolerance desertion policy. Further relevant information: 84% of Adeptus Arbites precincts still secure. Reports of human partisans in xeno-controlled territory, confirmed. Reports of Orkoid activity, unconfirmed. Reports of Necron activity, unfounded. Reports of Ruinous Powers active among Imperial populace: unfounded. Space Marine presence: confirmed.'''
'''Does user require further from this?'''
"No, Grid. You have fulfilled my demands." Vercingetorix disconnected from the tactical grid and began reasserting control over his Dreadnought. "Awake, Spirit. I have finished communing with the Grid.
'''Welcome back, my companion. Did your absence enlighten you?'''
"The Grid assisted as it was able. It is strange to speak to a spirit so dim. Your presence has made me forget the cognitive sloth that assails so many of Mars's blessed creations. I value your presence greatly, Spirit."
The machine spirit warmed Vercingetorix, soothing his throbbing head. He relaxed and let the gentle rocking of his body's ponderous footsteps soothe him into a state of relaxation.
'''You are a good companion, my companion. Your dedication to duty is admirable. I do not think I will allow you to die in this engagement.'''
As the dreadnought plodded toward the Steel Revenants' temporary command post, Vercingetorix allowed himself to drift off to sleep.

--PART 4--
http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/14757621/

--PART 5--
http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/14886123/

--PART 6 (some chucklefucks downvoted the archive, so here's the blog post intead)--
http://ferrusfair.blogspot.de/2011/08/entombed-vi.html

--PART 7--
http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/16052711/

--PART 8 (Only blog from now on)--
http://ferrusfair.blogspot.de/2011/09/entombed-viii.html

--PART 9--
http://ferrusfair.blogspot.de/2011/10/entombed-ix.html

--PART 10 (first half, second half never got finishd)--
http://ferrusfair.blogspot.de/2012/01/entombed-x-part-1.html

--PROLOGUE--
http://ferrusfair.blogspot.de/2012/02/entombed-prologue.html

--PART 2.5 (Takes place between Part 2 and 3, different protagonist)--
http://ferrusfair.blogspot.de/2011/12/entombed-25-aleksos.html
[[Category:Stories/Warhammer 40,000]][[Category:Warhammer 40,000]]

Approved Literature

2022-06-01T17:29:07Z

2001:8003:1C20:8C00:5D2D:793E:FBA7:711: Undo revision 828373 by 83.10.83.73 (talk)

{{editwar}}

This page lists the genre fiction which is popular on /tg/, along with a brief description and the notable area's of merit.

==== The Jane Austen principle ====

Jane Austen's work has been a staple of English Literature for two centuries. It's been adapted for stage, screen and television and beloved by millions. That said, while "Pride and Prejudice" might be a timeless romance that can move the heart, it is pretty far removed from the shared interest of the sort of people which might come here (at least until someone whips up a really good Dice and Graph version). This is not a knock against Jane, her work or you for liking it or some other removed work of literature, just a fact to keep in mind when adding things to this page.

'''TL;DR:''' Good material is not automatically relevant to 1d4chan.

==Fantasy==
*'''''Richard Adams - Watership Down''''': The epic story of a tiny band of desperate people's odyssey to flee a great calamity and find a new homeland. Along the way, they fight dangerous battles, encounter dangerously seductive dystopia after dystopia, and ultimately destroy a fascist dictator before founding a new nation. Also, [[Bunnies and Burrows|everyone's a rabbit]]. Badass storytelling, sweet worldbuilding, and an incredible level of quality for a children's book.
*'''''L. Frank Baum - The Wizard of Oz''''': Dorothy and her little dog too get [[isekai]]'ed, meet companions, defeat the witch. Baum (or rather, his publishers) milked this franchise to death releasing sequel after sequel, so stick only to the first book, unless you're going weird idea mining.
*'''''Jim Butcher - [[The Dresden Files RPG|The Dresden Files]]''''': Basically the [[World of Darkness]] with <s>all</s> most of the depression, brooding, doom and gloom replaced with badass, humour and a pinch of noir detective. Follow the young wizard/private investigator Harry Dresden through his misadventures in a supernatural world of Chicago, as he grows in power and fame, deals with ever increasing levels of supernatural horrors, get his life ruined to oblivion and beyond and yet manage to make it look cool rather then utterly depressing and sanity-check inducing by sheer will alone (OK, will ''and'' snarkiness).
*'''''Brandon Carbaugh - Deep Sounding''''': A two-part story written by a fa/tg/uy, dealing with themes of isolation in a Dwarven society. Consistently humorous and socially relevant.
*'''''Glen Cook - The Black Company''''': I can't remember the exact quote, but someone put it best when he said "it's a story about level 5-8 badasses trying to make it in a world dominated by epic level Wizards". Follow the mercenary entourage known as the Black Company as they sell their swords to the highest contractors, who usually end up being The Big Bad Evils. The first three books (now conveniently available as one book, "Chronicles of the Black Company") are good then things start to get weird.
*'''''Larry Correia - [[Monster Hunter International]]''''': In the modern world monsters of all kinds are out there. Stopping them from eating humanity are private groups of monster hunters who get paid very handsomely for removing the supernatural with superior firepower. As one would expect from an author with a background in running a gun store and competitive shooting, it's very [[/k/]]. A character's choice of firearm describes them as much as their clothes or hair and guns work as they're supposed to. The first book (which can be obtained as a free e-book) is enjoyable, but very rough, and the series improved dramatically each book. Features a writing style that improves dramatically when listened to as an audiobook.
**'''''Grimnoir Chronicles''''': A separate series by the same author. Set in an alternate 1930s where a small (but constantly increasing) percentage of humanity has been born with super powers since at least the 1830s. While there's X-men style discrimination, it's largely in the background. The series is actually about how Japan is trying to use its research of Power to take over the world. The super power system is unique in that there are only about 30 documented Power types, with many just being lesser versions of other powers, and outside of a core handful everything else is rare but the creative and powerful can stretch the rules. The world has also had cultural and technological shifts as a result of Power instead of keeping it the same aside from their existence.
*'''''Steven R. Donaldson - Thomas Covenant''''': The first two series are the ones /tg/ has read; there's a (much) more recent series that ostensibly wraps it all up, plus some outtakes (like "Gilden-Fire") that SRD refactored as shortstories. The titular character nuzzled the wrong armadillo apparently so is a leper. In the story he gets [[isekai]]'ed; driven with self-hatred and a refusal to compromise, he does [[rape|horrible things]] but anyway has to defeat the [[BBEG]] named, we shit you not, "Lord Foul". Massive influence on [[Monte Cook]]'s [[Arcana Unearthed]] oeuvre (particularly) so we gotta note it. The ''Ansible'' #46 article "Well-Tempered Plot Device" hilariously described these two series as "so flatulent you have to be careful not to squeeze it in a public place"; publisher Lester Del Rey is rumoured (''Ansible'' #50) to have disliked the series too, but (correctly) judged the (mid 1970s) moment as good to release some fantasy ''any'' fantasy. SRD wrote some other fantasy and SF; only fans of the Covenant books went on to buy those, but they number enough to maintain Donaldson's alimony payments. Characters get forcibly boned in those stories too.
*'''''Steven Erikson - Malazan Book of the Fallen''''': An enormous read that stretches across over three million words and ten books, Erikson's worldbuilding rivals anybody else in the genre, with a large focus on the many different cultures, how they rose, and then how they fell. Can be overwhelming at times due to the sheer number of simultaneous plotlines and a large, perhaps even bloated, cast. Very much the definition of epic fantasy, the level of power at play swings fairly wildly depending on which set of characters is being focused on at the time, from assassins fighting upon rooftops, to flying castles being crashed into cities, and then back to the oft-humorous exploits of a group of mostly mundane soldiers that is reminiscent of Glen Cook's Black Company. In all, a story full of engaging personalities exploring a supremely fantastical world, with all the hallmarks of classic fantasy, elves, dragons, gods, and wizards, given a unique spin.
*'''''Raymond E. Feist - The Riftwar Cycle''''': A 30 book epic written over the course of three decades, The Riftwar Cycle starts off as the story of a boy learning how to be a wizard, only to save the world by the end of the debut novel, ''Magician''. After this the series evolves into an epic spanning multiple generations of characters (but roughly half focusses on the initial cast) fighting to protect their world from internal political strife and malevolent external forces. Grew to be a lot more cosmic in scale in the last eight or so books, and the ending was kind of a lacklustre business. The classical fantasy races are not the focus here: the [[dwarves]] and [[elves]] get along just fine, and while there's [[dragon]]s, serpent folk and [[dark elves]] (the latter of whom are Native American inspired), it's mostly about humans and their struggles. The series is divided into ten sagas, with the best one being the Empire trilogy which tells the tale of the chronologically six first book from the perspective of the antagonists in a beautiful tale of loyalty, honour, politics and love. Was also Neal Hallford's inspiration for ''Betrayal at Krondor'', a [[/v/|Dynamix / Sierra vidja]] that is held in high esteem in some circles. Not enough circles, apparently; since Hallford's remaster proposal didn't get funded.
*'''''Neil Gaiman - American Gods, The Graveyard Book, Neverwhere, Sandman, etc.''''': He's a damn entertaining writer, known for his unique and well fleshed out ideas. There's something here for everyone, from the [[Noblebright]] Stardust to the [[Grimdark|fairly grim and pretty dark]] Sandman comics. American Gods, however, is the one he's best remembered by, which is a story about physical manifestations of IRL gods fighting a losing war against globalisation, mass media and technology. [[/d/|There's also a part where a man is swallowed whole by a woman's vagina.]]
*'''''Jane Gaskell - The Atlan Saga''''': A series of gloriously cheesy fantasy novels from the 60s that combine all the best elements of pulp with post-modernism. The misadventures of a heiress to Atlantis empire in the prehistoric world where various myths - and genre cliches - are all true. It's the last big thing in the genre that didn't try to copy-cat ''Lord of the Rings'', so worth reading for originality alone, along with being what shaped various cliches regarding Atlantis ever since.
*'''''William Goldman - [[The Princess Bride]]''''': The book the famous movie was based on. Has a couple of twists and details left out of the movie, usually for good reasons. Still worth reading, though.
*'''''Michael John Harrison - Viriconium''''': A truly peculiar set of novels and short stories dedicated to put traditional world building on its head, by never making sure if the stories are happening between the same characters, in the same place or same time. A very open-ended to interpretation "setting", which is also a great exercise to how tell a story without overburdening anyone with details and in the same time providing all the important elements to keep audience (readers or players) invested and interested.
*'''''Robin Hobb - The Farseer Trilogy and The Liveship Traders''''': First is a story of a royal bastard's horrible upbringing as an assassin. Second is a story of magical sailing ships that talk, dragons, pirates, rape, 14 year old girl overcoming terrible misfortune. It has it all. (Please note the following two sets of books in the series are a little average compared to these two). The endings of the books in the second series are a little pat, but are still entertaining.
*'''''[[Robert E. Howard]] - [[Conan the Barbarian]]''''': Conan the Barbarian was born from this quill. A seminal pulp classic which could be considered the father of sword and sorcery.
*'''''Ursula K LeGuin - [[Earthsea Cycle]]+''''': Threads about /tg/-approved literature will consistently end up having a poster say something to the effect of "no Sea Jedi Wizard Chronicles WTF" about halfway down, immediately being followed by a chorus of agreement. Needless to say, this series is an excellent one, little-known but surprisingly influential. It's the series that established the concepts of the concept of nominal magic as understood in modern fantasy literature: names of power in the language of magic are spoken to exert power over the person, place, thing or idea that name refers to. Later, less-respectable novels such as those by Christopher Paolini would abuse this concept for fun and profit. Sadly, such novels seldom strive to equal the actual accomplishments of the Earthsea novels, such as the successful building and display of a rich, believable, and internally consistent setting without letting any of the world building bog down the narrative like in LotR.
*'''''Fritz Leiber - Swords and Deviltry, et al.''''': A runaway momma's boy and a failed magician's apprentice lose everything and become thieves in Lankhmar, centre of civilization and debauchery. They are Fafhrd and the Gray Mouser:, swordsmen supreme, insatiable adventurers, womanizers unequalled, and bros of the highest calibre. Together, they plunder the world of riches, bitches, and wine, while facing magic and horror of a decidedly cosmic sort.
*'''''[[C.S. Lewis]] - The Lion, The Witch, and The Wardrobe''''': Oxford don retells the Johannine Passion, but in Oz-expy Narnia. Our man is inferior (even) to Baum as a worldbuilder, but very good as characterbuilder - for the characters Edward, Lucy, and (later) Eustace anyway. Series goes on like ''Star Wars'' forward and backward in time; ends with [[Rocks Fall, Everyone Dies]] except older sister Susan, whom [[catgirl|NekoJesus]] blows off. Neil Gaiman will whiteknight "Professor Hastings" in "The Problem of Susan".
*'''''Charles De Lint - Someplace to be Flying and Trader, Pretty much all of his books, you can't really miss''''': Most of the books seem to be set in Canada and revolve around Gypsy folklore and Native American spiritual stuff with urban settings. Don't get attached to characters.
*'''''[[George R. R. Martin]] - [[A Song of Ice and Fire]]''''': Some of the better character development in genre, with a bit of mystery, political chess and high death rate. Tends to drag at times, and since the release of the HBO series will be consistently overrated by those who've seen little else. Noted for Tolkien-envy.
*'''''[[Michael Moorcock]] - [[Elric]] series (and so many others)''''' An iconic author, albeit considering the number of books he has written, very hit and miss. [[Elric]] is his most popular character. Stick to the collected sets Stealer of Souls or Stormbringer as a starting point though. Remember that Elric is first an foremost an icon for heavy metal, so adjust your expectations accordingly.
*'''''Terry Pratchett - [[Discworld]] series''''': Starts from parodying Fantasy as a genre, soon turns to far beyond [[AWESOME]]. Rare combination of good humour and wise messages. Does get a little preachy towards the end, but hey, it's still a great read.
*'''''Patrick Rothfuss - The Name of the Wind''''': A mary sue bard goes on mary sue adventures (arguably an unreliable narrator) - world building may be weak but it's a fun read, so enough people on /tg/ have read it to count, even though nobody will praise it.
*'''''J.K. Rowling - [[Harry Potter]]''''': Love it or hate it (and there are things to [[RAGE|hate]], [[skub|especially where the author herself is concerned]]) this series is a big part of the collective fantasy consciousness, especially where normies are concerned. As such, if you want a tone that is easily familiar to those unfamiliar with fantasy in general, or children, this is not a bad place to start. At best, they're pretty readable books; at worst, they're thoroughly mediocre and derivative as all hell. At the very least, you'll look less of a [[neckbeard]] knowing what a Muggle is. '''MAIN BOOKS ONLY.'''
*'''''Andrzej Sapkowski - [[The Witcher]] (especially the short stories)''''': While the Witcher saga is just getting more bland and increasingly more generic with each following part, the two initial books collecting all the short stories (especially "Sword of Destiny") are the reason why everyone treated Witcher as unique and original. Tonnes of wacky ideas how to spin cliches and old tropes into something fresh. Reading the saga proper is not required and generally not advised, especially with wooden English translation.
** Alternatively, the later saga can be read for precisely what it is routinely bashed for. Starting from "Baptism of Fire", it turns into an unapologetic "you all met in the forest reserve and your party is tasked with retrieving a lost princess" campaign. If read with such mindset, it's pretty good after-campaign report, including random hijinks, new players joining half-way through and bunch of party in-jokes about the situation at hand.
*'''''[[J.R.R. Tolkien]] - [[The Hobbit]], [[The Lord of the Rings]], and anything else he wrote (eg; [[the Silmarillion]])''''': The great grand-daddy of modern fantasy. Not having even the slightest familiarity with his work is inexcusable in eyes of [[/tg/]].
*'''''Karl Edward Wagner - Kane series''''': Essentially a more grimdark version of Howard's style of sword and sorcery, [[Kane]] is more akin to a villain that Conan would fight than the "noble savage" barbarian archetype. Immortal and cursed with the inability to ever truly settle down, [[Kane]] is an expert fighter, leader of men and potent sorcerer. After thousands of years his only real goal is to stave off boredom, which he does by offering his services and considerable intellect to various rulers, although more often than not with an ulterior motive. In one story he sets out to revive a race of ancient cosmic horrors simply because they offered him a chance to explore the cosmos.
*'''''Gene Wolfe - The Book of the New Sun''''': The setting is inspired by [[Jack Vance]]'s Dying Earth series (itself lifting from [[Clark Ashton Smith]]), so this could be either in SF or Fantasy. A torturer is exiled from his guild and old life after he helps kill the woman he loves to spare her from the agony of torture, now forced to journey through Urth; our Earth in the far, far, far future, in a time when our sun is beginning to die. These books do not make for easy reading, however. The author uses lots of very obscure words to create the worlds own unique lingo. Also, the main character is an unreliable narrator of the more extreme sort. The reader will be spending some time figuring out what are the truths and what are the lies.
*'''''Roger Zelazny - The Chronicles of Amber''''': A lesser known series (although it's in Appendix N too) written between 1970 and 1991 about a family of (essentially) demigods who inhabit the "true" reality of the city of Amber. Everything else is merely a shadow of Amber and its inhabitants. The princes and princesses can move freely between Amber and an infinite number shadow worlds but the constant plotting and backstabbing at home and the less-than-real nature of everything outside makes them callous and often amoral. The first book effortlessly turns from "hard boiled detective story" to "psychedelic road trip" to "drama about Greek gods" in style.

==Science Fiction==
*'''''Douglas Adams - The Increasingly Inaccurately Named Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy Trilogy''''': One of the funniest works of science fiction ever made, although you could count it as the first. The precursor to all comedy stories about everyday people having to deal with the absurdly massive and meaningless universe around them. Grab your towel, make a fresh cuppa, and make sure you've got enough tape to keep your sides from splitting too much.
*'''''Neal Asher - The Gridlinked Series''''': Some of the best, hardest sci-fi out there, this is one of those universes that has unique, creative technologies (rare nowadays)as well as 007...EEEN SPESSS
*'''''[[Isaac Asimov]] - Foundation Series''''': The seminal space opera modelled roughly on the decline of the Roman Empire. It follows the rise of a new civilization from this empire's dying body and then its corpse. The model of Empire-In-Decline SF.
*'''''Paolo Bacigalupi - Pump Six and Other Stories''''': Biopunk meet post-apo and hefty dose of shady business. Think [[Shadowrun]], minus the magic.
*'''''Iain M. Banks - [[The Culture]] Series''''': A series about a perfect, utopian spacefaring society and all its many problems. Some of the grandest-scale worldbuilding in science fiction, and full of clever ethical and political musing.
*'''''Stephen Baxter - The [[Xeelee Sequence]]''''': For those for whom Donaldson just isn't rapey enough, Baxter is here to scratch that itch. Backdrop is the cosmic war between the Xeelee and the dark-matter entities "Photino Birds". Starts with ''The Ring''. Baxter wrote a lot of other crap too, like Proxima and Stone Spring/Bronze Summer; likewise full of nasty. We'd rather not discuss this stuff either but Xeelee has its stans on /tg/: this entry is dedicated to you, as long as you read it outside a 500 yard radius from a school.
*'''''David Brin - The Postman''''': First novel to present post apocalypse not from the point of view of badass heroes or insane raiders, but random villagers and such. Great world building for a very small world. Has infamous film "adaptation", sharing only title.
*'''''Edgar Rice Burroughs - the Barsoom Series-aka Mars Chronicles and the Pellucidar Series''''': Iconic, manly, and fuckin' A! This guy also did Tarzan and a whole slew of other works that would go on to inspire other manly stories, chiefly Conan the Barbarian and most of the knockoffs thereof.
*'''''Glen Cook - The Dragon Never Sleeps''''': Basically an EVE Online novel written decades before EVE Online. Was supposed to be a trilogy but the publisher wouldn't okay sequels so it gets rushed at the end. Not as iconic as The Black Company, but this is in SPAAAAAAACCCCEEEE!!!!!!!
*'''''James S. A. Corey - The Expanse series''''' Bar the intentionally fantastical elements it provides <s>a fairly grounded</s> muh gritty realism version of near future space exploration. Some fantastic characters and stories, but as the main plot goes, slowly turns into a generic space opera-western mix. Got an unapproved TV show adaptation that ignores all the good stuff, while taking the worst aspects of the books and runs wild with them.
*'''''Arthur Conan Doyle - The Lost World''''': The ''other'' thing Doyle is know after Sherlock Holmes. An archetypical novel about bold scientists, ambitious hunter and intrepid reporter going into a distant plateau somewhere in the Amazons, where they have all sorts of misadventures involving species that should be extinct millions years ago - and most notably living dinosaurs. There is a good chance you "know" this book, along with all its plot bits, without ever actually reading it, that's how big and influential it is.
*'''''Harlan Ellison - I Have No Mouth, and I Must Scream''''': The last five humans alive are being held deep in an underground complex, where they are perpetually tortured by AM, the sadistic AI that wiped out the rest of humanity, with no hope of escape. The most creepy thing in this book is that the author thought it was ''optimistic''. If he someday went to wrote something pessimistic, the universe would implode from the sheer grimdark overdose.
*'''''Philip Jose Farmer - The Riverworld Series''''': A group of dead people from many different time periods, including Richard Burton, Hermann Göring, Tullus of Rome and Mark Twain wake up on an alien planet and have to survive. Very fun read with interesting character interactions.
*'''''[[Robert Heinlein| Robert A. Heinlein]] - [[Starship Troopers]]''''': Where Space Marines and Tyranids came from. The novel carries a vastly different message and tone than the campy movie based on it. [[Roboute Guilliman]] keeps a copy in his duffel.
*'''''Frank Herbert - [[Dune]] & its earlier sequels''''': World-building, politics, super-humans - it's one helluva party. The spice must flow! <s>[[Navigator|Navigators]] are totally not stolen from Dune</s> {{BLAM}}.
*'''''Aldous Huxley - Brave New World''''': Take 1984, and do the total opposite the way people are controlled (rather than punishing bad behavior, it's rewarding good behavior) mixed with a Tau-esque genetically enforced caste system and conditioning to make people embrace their servitude.
*'''''Stanisław Lem - Tales Of Pirx the Pilot''''': Collection of short stories documenting gradual progress of humanity in space exploration and AI development. Nice deconstruction of all the shitty elements from space opera, ''before there even was space opera''.
*'''''Andri Magnason - LoveStar''''': Equal parts biting satire and bittersweet love story, set in a bizarre future (think equal part of Brave New World, corporate dystopia and high-concept sci-fi). It's the humour and creative application of own setting and its rules that makes it helpful for worldbuilding that amounts to anything more than just trivia.
*'''''Walter M. Miller, Jr. - A Canticle for Leibowitz''''' In the grim darkness of the far future there is only Catholicism. Think Fallout meets Catholic Church and you wouldn't be too far off.
*'''''Larry Niven - Ringworld''''': Many, many stories are set in this future setting. Features FtL travel, several alien races living and dead, and deep lore from the far past. There's a war with [[catgirl]]s called Kzinti, which events Niven has let other authors write. The Ringworld is a Dyson sphere on the cheap: instead of wrapping the entire sun, "only" the inhabitable orbital ring is built up, above the stellar rotational equator.
*'''''George Orwell - [[1984]], Animal Farm''''': WAR IS PEACE, FREEDOM IS SLAVERY, IGNORANCE IS STRENGTH! FOUR LEGS GOOD! TWO LEGS <s>BAD</s> BETTER!
*'''''Robert Shea and Robert Anton Wilson - The Illuminatus! Trilogy''''': /x/ the book, and a cult classic in every sense of the word. Once you get used to the massively cheesy tone, what you'll find here is an intelligent and fun series of books that are both a parody and a send up to: 70s counterculture, Western esotericism, political and religious dogma, numerology, and conspiracy theories.
*'''''Robert Sheckley - short stories''''': once dubbed the clown prince of sci-fi, recommended by Douglas Adams.
*'''''John Steakley - Armor'''''
*'''''Charles Stross - Missile Gap''''': While Stross is most famous for his Laundry Files (basically collection of [[Delta Green]] shorts, which are all worth reading too), Missile Gap is just mind-numbing novella about entire Earth being transported on an Alderson disk... or maybe a snapshot of Earth... or maybe ''both''. All right in the middle of the Cuban Crisis. Think "Primer" meet Tom Clancy techno-thriller.
*'''''H.G. Wells - The War of the Worlds and Time Machine''''': Absolute classics. Not knowing them is akin to being illiterate, while they can be used for all sorts of games.

==Horror==
*'''''John W. Campbell - Who Goes There?''''': Remember John Carpenter's The Thing? Well this is where it all started. Taking into account ''when'' the novella was written is the real game-changer.
*'''''Laurell K. Hamilton - Guilty Pleasures''''': Probably one of the most iconic and influential urban fantasy in existence, despite seemingly obvious setup for occult detective. While the rest of the Anita Blake series is unquestionably in shunned territory, this one is still a must-read. Also, mind the title.
**'''''Aneta Jadowska - Dora Wilk series''''': Essentially Anita Blake: Polish Edition. Unlike original, doesn't turn into BDSM harem porn, but instead gradually distances itself from romance and focuses on the world-building and occult. Also, it fully embraces being written to cover for bills. Decent fan translations exist.
*'''''[[H.P. Lovecraft]] - At the Mountains of Madness and anything else published after it''''': Lovecraft is to modern horror what Tolkien is to fantasy. While his early stories are mediocre, starting with At the Mountains of Madness, their quality rises sharply, explaining how this guy reached such memetic status.
*'''''Richard Matheson - I Am Legend''''': Single-handedly responsible for creation of post apocalypse genre and modern take on zombies and vampires. Also, depressive as fuck, so bring some tissues. No, really. None of the 3 film adaptations managed to match the quality of the novel.
*'''''Anne Rice - The Vampire Chronicles''''': Where [[Vampire: The Masquerade]] started. You are probably already familiar with this particular style of vampires even without knowing there were any books, that's how iconic the imaginary is. And for the sake of everyone's sanity, let's just pretend the Chronicles consists of only three books: ''Interview with the Vampire'', ''The Vampire Lestat'' and ''The Queen of the Damned''. You really don't want to read any further titles, trust us on that, especially since this is a self-contained trilogy.

==Alternate History==
*'''''SM Stirling - The Peshawar Lancers''''': In the 1878 a bunch of comets hit the Earth causing much havoc and forcing the British to Evacuate to warmer parts of the world. In 2025 the British Empire still reigns as the most powerful nation on earth run from Delhi, along with French Africa, the Japanese Empire and a rather nasty Russian Empire in a world powered by steam. If you want steampunk that's more than superficial, exotic and just all around well done this is where you go. Just be prepared for a lot of Indian terms.
*'''''Charles Stross - The Merchant Princes''''': A Boston tech reporter one day finds out that she can jump between alternate versions of Earth and that she's part of a large extended family with that talent based in a world at a renaissance level where semi-romanized viking knights control the eastern seaboard of North America and the Chinese have begun colonizing the west coast, and said family is deeply involved in the Drug Trade. That is just the start as events also include a steampunk America ruled by the English crown, homeland security and more. Good for lovers of crime and intrigue, blending both the medieval and the modern quite well.
*'''''Scott Westerfield - Leviathan series''''': In this absolutely batshit-insane reimagining of World War One, the world is divided into two competing schools of technological thought - the Clankers, who represent machines and mechanization; and the Darwinists, who believe in mutating nature to solve man's problems. Naturally, the Central Powers are the chief adherents of the Clanker philosophy and you can imagine the brutal warfare of the Western Front except with [[The Empire (Warhammer Fantasy)|German Steam Tanks]] versus genetically-enhanced [[Clan Moulder|British Abominations]]. [[Awesome|Yeah]]. Word of warning, the series is advertised as a YA novel series and does feature some questionably mundane character plotlines that do tend to spoil the setting a bit.

==Mystery==
*'''''Raymond Chandler - The Big Sleep''''': The grandfather of noir, single-handedly responsible for establishing about half of all genre conventions and creating the image of what an investigator should be like. If you '''ever''' plan to run just about anything about cool detectives doing cool stuff, it's a must read.
**'''''The Lady in the Lake''''': Probably the most applicable of the books featuring Marlowe, trading the big city and its massive police department for rural nowhere and a much smaller scale investigation, but not stakes.
*'''''Agatha Christie - And Then There Were None''''': Ten random strangers trapped with a vengeful killer. Or so they think. Aged like milk, but is still one of the staples of the genre and a well-tested premise.
*'''''Harlan Coben - Tell No One''''': A grieving widower receives a message with a proof that his wife, murdered few years ago, is actually alive and well, and her kidnapping was just a set-up. Like all Coben books, it's a pyramid scheme of backroom deals, conflicting motivations and gaslighting the reader, but due to its plot structure, it's the closest to your near-occult investigation for a game campaign.
*'''''Arthur Conan Doyle - The Adventures of Sherlock Holmes''''': A staple of detective fiction, often to the point of being considered the godfather of the genre. An incredibly useful point of reference for late 19th century social norms and attitudes, on top of being a great influence for mystery-focused campaigns. If you run Call of Cthulhu or any period-specific setting relevant to Victorian Britain, Doyle's tales are a must-read.

==Historical Fiction==
*'''''Robert Bolt - The Mission''''': A journey of a young boy into becoming a murder-hobo and then trying to repent his sins as a missionary, taking place in 1740s Paraguay. But more seriously, it's about the Jesuits and their mission in a patch of land contested between Spain and Portugal, with great, nuanced characters caught up in a conflict they can't even hope to win. Mostly famous for its movie adaptation with de Niro and Irons and cutting the entire backstory which made the book worth reading in the first place.
*'''''Tom Clancy - The Hunt for Red October''''': '''The''' quintessential techno-thriller, being one of the hallmarks of the entire genre and probably the most famous of all Clancy's book. Tightly written, with plausible story and great characters.
*'''''Bernard Cornwell - [[Sharpe]]''''': A series of books following Richard Sharp as he rises through the ranks of the British Army during the first few decades of the 1800s (the bulk of it set during the Napoleonic Wars). More commonly known by its great TV series, staring Sean Bean.
*'''''Alexandre Dumas - The Three Musketeers''''': It's '''THE''' swashbuckling novel. You probably more or less know what is it about just from its sheer impact on culture and pop-culture. Duels, political intrigue, romancing and most importantly, friendship above everything. Has bunch of continuations, along with just as numerous adaptations.
*'''''Paul Féval - Le Bossu''''' [or ''The Hunchback'']: The '''other''' swashbuckler. Chevalier Henri Lagardère swears vengeance over the death of his friend, duke de Nevers, while escaping with Nevers' infant daughter Aurore, from the hands of assassins. Years later he returns, in disguise of a hunchbacked accountant, to wreck havoc and have his way with the villainous prince de Gonzague. In the background, France is trying to figure out itself after the death of Louis XIV and the resulting regency. Both film adaptations are approved genre classics.
*'''''C.S. Forester - Horatio Hornblower''''': A series of books following Horatio Hornblower as he rises through the ranks of the Royal Navy from the late 1700’s through the early 1800’s. Has a TV series adaptation free off YouTube if books aren’t your thing.
*'''''George MacDonald Fraser - [[Flashman]]''''': A 19th century, cowardly and womanizing British buffoon with a pedigree goes from one crazy adventure to another around the globe. Meanwhile the writer has fun with all the genre conventions and relentlessly mocking the Victorian literature. A little on the nose, but how else you turn stuff like Kipling into actual engaging adventuring?
*'''''Homer - The Iliad''''': One of the oldest pieces of historical fiction. Trojan prince steals a Greek king's wife and all of Greece comes for revenge. For a long time considered complete fiction, but excavations and analysis suggest at least at a concept level Homer's epic is based on real war, even if the details got obscured or lost over hundreds of years of oral tradition.
*'''''Allan Mallinson - Matthew Hervey series''''': If Captain Aubrey was the pinnacle of Napoleonic naval escapades then the career of Matthew Hervey is the pinnacle of life in the cavalry regiments of the time. A series of 14 splendid novels, the level of detail is tremendous, touching on many of the equestrian and veterinarian aspects of cavalry upkeep and warfare that is presented in a much more manly fashion than what passes for horse-care in those sappy teen's novels. Also helps that the author was a bona-fide military officer of the (Queen Mary's Own) Royal Hussars. If you've ever wondered how the fuck the armies of the 19th century could maintain so much cavalry and how those regiments lived, this is the series for you.
*'''''Cormac McCarthy - Blood Meridian''''': Set during the middle of the 19th century in the southern United States, it follows the exploits of "The Kid" who joins what is essentially a band of Murderhobos to terrorize the prairie and hunt Indians. It doesn't sound like anything special, until you count in the fact that the group is possibly led by the devil himself. And he leads the group on to ever greater acts of depravity that would make Khorne and Slaneesh uneasy.
*'''''Brian Moore - Black Robe''''': A French Jesuit on his perilous quest to reach a remote mission, helped by distrusting Algonquian guides and crossing with them the bleak, frozen hell that is pre-colonial Ontario. The novel combines two elements that make it worth reading: it is well-researched on all covered subjects, creating a very handy panorama of 17th century Canada, and, more importantly, it puts a nice spin on the generic "travel up-stream through all sort of dangers" plot to make it interesting. The film adaptation is also approved.
*'''''Patrick O'Brian - Aubrey–Maturin series''''': A series of 21 nautical historical novels, set during the Napoleonic Wars and centering on the friendship between Captain Jack Aubrey of the Royal Navy and his ship's surgeon Stephen Maturin. Almost autistically well-researched and amazingly addictive series which should be read by just about anyone even wishing to run a maritime-themed game. They are really addictive, so make sure you have enough time to spare before starting reading. The film adaptation is also approved.
*'''''Erich Maria Remarque - All Quiet on the Western Front''''': The personal story of a German soldier named Paul Breuer, who details the exploits and sufferings of his regiment during the 1st World War on the Western front. If you are looking for an account of how truly and utterly apocalyptic WW1 was, look no further. The book details almost every part of a soldiers life, from chilling behind the front lines to storming an enemy trench and the author (who himself fought in the war) is at times damn straight and at other times damn poetic about it. Beautiful descriptions of nature and accounts of friends being ripped to shreds by grenades are often just a paragraph apart, so its quite the rollercoaster.
** Since it's a pretty short read, it leaves you with time to indulge in the follow-up, '''The Road Back''', which features the surviving soldiers from the same company (but not the same characters) from the previous book, trying to re-integrate into society and miserably failing.
*'''''Walter Scott - Ivanhoe''''': The grand-daddy of the entire genre. Adventures and misadventures of a chivalrous knight who does his very best to collect ransom needed for king Richard the Lion Heart, while fending off against those nefarious Normans and their machinations. Despite its age, still holding pretty well.
*'''''Neal Stephenson - The Baroque Cycle''''': Adventures of a really big cast of characters living amidst of the central events of the late 17th and early 18th centuries in Europe, Africa, Asia, and Central America. Extremely well-researched portray of the era, seamlessly blending history with fictional characters. And a real door-stopper.
*'''''Robert Louis Stevenson - Treasure Island''''': If by any chance or twist of fate you still didn't read it, you damn should right now. Absolute classic and absolute gold mine for ideas, not even for pirate game, but just adventuring in general.
*'''''Mika Waltari - The Egyptian, The Etruscan''''': "The Egyptian" follows the life of a fictional Egyptian Sinuhe living in the New Kingdom period and witnessing the upheaval that monotheism and war with Hittites bring to the ordered Egypt. "The Etruscan" does the same for Turms, an amnesiac hero set in the time of Greco-Persian Wars and the beginnings of the Roman Republic. Waltari was recognised and lauded by the historians at the time for spending autistic-levels of time researching the cultures he was writing about - but don't expect too much of it still hold value, century of additional research later.
*'''''Kawabata Yasunari - The Master of Go''''': The story of a brash young [[munchkin|power gamer]] challenging a grizzled old [[neckbeard]] to a championship [[Go]] match. Chronicles the national-scale edition war that was 1930s Japan through the medium of gaming obsessed hyper-autists.

==Weird Stuff==
*'''''David Brin - Uplift Hexology''''': A sort of really lazily worldbuilt sci-fi setting, based around the idea that a trillions-years-old galactic civilization is perpetuated by the "uplifting" of near-sentient animals and tool-using species. Every species has its specific attitude and special trait, like most bad sci-fi, except for humans and their uplifted dolphins and chimpanzees. But it does have some interesting ideas about evolution and how that could lead to truly strange forms of life and ways of thinking, if you can suffer through all the ecofanaticism.
*'''''The World of Kong: A Natural History of Skull Island''''': Created as a tie-in to the 2005 remake of King Kong by Peter Jackson, this book is a glorified encyclopedia that explores the geography, flora and fauna of Skull Island as depicted in the film, vastly expanding upon the pulp fantasy-influenced artificial environment designed for the film. This book is a ''goldmine'' for worldbuilding and creature design if you want to do a [[Sword & Sorcery]] or fantasy [[Stone Age]] setting, or just include a "Lost World of [[dinosaur]]s" type area in your own setting, with an incredible variety of fleshed out beasts ranging from small, inoffensive coastal grazers to apex predators. The only drawback is that it's out of print and extremely hard to find in physical copy at a non-exorbitant price.
*'''''Dante Alleghiri - The Divine Comedy''''': In this section because due to genre-spinning hybrid that it is. It is also a very trippy experience. The Divine Comedy is best known for its first part, the Inferno, which pretty much codified culture and pop-culture take on Hell. Beyond that, its also a good look at Renaissance, with both its politics and fascination in antiquity. The second and third parts are much more esoteric and increasingly focused specifically on Christian theology, but worth looking into for Dante's literary skills.

==Mythology==
*'''''Beowulf''''': ''Not'' the English national epic, as Tollers noted; it belongs to the Geats, a now-dead tribe of para-Swedes. Beowulf rips Grendel's arm off, then goes down [[What|to kill his mum]]. Beowulf is killed, himself, by a dragon. Somehow got translated into Old Anglo-Saxon, sprinkled with an ultrathin veneer of Christianity, and copied; long enough for the English to find it again.
*'''''The Epic of Gilgamesh''''': The original Conan, gettin' bitches and slayin' witches since 1800BC, baby. The story of Gilgamesh (no shit; might have been Bilgamesh originally), a demi-god <strike>Babylonian</strike> Sumerian (big difference) king who the gods continually try to beat down and/or kill because he's [[Awesome|just that fucking awesome.]] [[That guy|He's also a HUUUUUUGE dick.]] Eventually meets his best bro for life Enkidu and they go on fuckin' sick adventures. Unfortunately some parts of the story are lost.
*'''''Kullervo''''': Some Finnish nationalist figured, how come ''we'' don'ts gots a mythology. So he made one - the Kalevala - but with even MORE grimdark and [[incest Smith|incest]]. JRR Tolkien edited a rendition of the Kullervo subset and, further, both he and Moorcock independently(?) took inspiration for their own antiheroes with magic souldraining swords, Turin and Elric respectively.
*'''''Mahābhārata''''': A Hindu epic story about family struggle for the rightful rule, performing your religious duty and also... pfft! Just kidding: it's wall to wall tits, ultra-violence and bullshit superpowers. But also family struggle, romances, political intrigues and handy panorama of nascent Hindu religion. Also - magnificent mustaches, the manlier you are, the bigger the stach. It's '''THE''' ultimate Bronze Age epic, long enough to take an entire bookshelf by itself. As such, you should be looking for an abridged version around 600-800 pages, rather than the whole thing.
*'''''Der Nibelunge liet (The Lay of the Nibelungs)''''': A ring is found at the Rhine; a dragon (Fafnir, for Wagner) finds it; dragon gets BTFOed by one Siegfried who is then corrupted himself. Written around AD 1200 by a High German, that is high up in Bavaria; with many parallels to similar stories in the ''Edda'' far north. Deemed too pagan for the Renaissance-era Germans, lost in the ensuing religious wars; rediscovered 1755 and became the national epic... for better or worse. Wagner's [[/pol/]]-approved take (Fafnir is a greedy dwarf, becomes that dragon) pulls more from the Norse. That's the one wherein wabbits are killed.
*'''''The Odyssey''''': Sequel to Homer's Iliad, possibly by a fan adopting that name. Odysseus, hero of the Trojan War with many cameos in the Iliad, has to go home to his wife - but he's in no hurry. Runs through many adventures before finally getting there; his wife somehow had stayed more loyal than ''he'' had. Many C.S. Lewis and then D&D monsters got aired here first. [Also] in Iliad / Odyssey fanfic may be included the Cypria and the Aeneid; Argonautica, concerning Jason's earlier voyage to the Black Sea, further had much influence from this book.
*'''''[[The Poetic Edda]]''''': A historical source, the Poetic Edda provides most of the basis for what we know about Norse myth and belief today. The mere fact that it's [[Viking]] myth poetry written in [[Awesome|Old Norse]] should entice most fa/tg/uys, but for those somehow unmoved still, it's basically THE sourcebook for the [[Lord of the Rings]] and all else [[Tolkien]]. If you want to know where Gandalf (who is basically Odin), [[Dwarves]] (and their names), [[Elves]], the phrase "[[Middle Earth]]" and that obsession he has for massive trees came from, then look no further. Also, pick up a copy of the Prose Edda while your reading this one, seeing as you're on a roll. Features a now-confirmed-to-AD-1022 visit to Newfoundland ("Markland"), whence the Norse bugged out in a generation because who the fuck wants to spend more time in Noof than one has to.

==History==
*'''''Julius Caesar - Commentaries on the Gallic War''''': If you study Latin, this is the first full text you'll be assigned to translate (same goes for Xenophon if you're learning Greek). Caesar wrote this autobiography of his campaign in Gaul to bolster his support among the only so-so literate plebs, and as a result it avoids using big, confusing words. On the flip-side, this makes it dreadfully dry and boring at times. Still, if you want to have ''the'' Roman experience, it's mandatory read.
*'''''Miguel de Cervantes Saavedra - The Ingenious Nobleman Mister Quixote of La Mancha''''': The misadventures of an old man driven to madness by reading chivalry novels, being the first major parody of the classic interpretation of that setting. Mixing comedy and a ton of political commentary for its time, it's one of the most important novels of all time, and the elements and tropes it brought to popular culture are referenced and satirized to this day.
*'''''Marcus Tullius Cicero - De Re Publica''''': A political dialogue, explaining all the virtues of Roman Republic. Survived only partially and in short-hands, but still makes a compelling read about "ideal" (and most definitely not idealised into absurdity) state of Roman politics and political machine, along with all the machinations gradually leading to [[Star_Wars|the Republic turning into the Empire]]. An obligatory read for all Romanboos.
*'''''Herodotus - Histories''''': As a historical account, it's almost completely useless and predominately fictional, being single-handedly responsible for bunch of deeply ingrained popular misconceptions about ancient Persia, Egypt, Sparta and Scythia. What it really is is the ancient world's equivalent of a gossip column, thus collecting all the most interesting, crazy and outlandish stories Herodotus heard or copied from others. As such, it's a perfect base for equally outlandish world-building and campaigns, mixing reality with fantasy.
*'''''Niccolò di Bernardo dei Machiavelli - The Prince''''': [[This guy]] seems to be very underrated in popular culture, and its name is often used as a pejorative term, sometimes as twisted or evil. But this guy only wrote some sort of historical summary of how previous governments around the world have risen to power, how they handled it, and how they lost it all. It's just a guide of how you should rule your kingdom. You totally won't find [[Skub]] here. There is a later version of the book with additional commentary by '''Napoléon Bonaparte''', which is naturally the preferred version. A major influence on Camarilla of [[Vampire: The Masquerade]] (note the name of their leaders).
*'''''Jan Chryzostom Pasek - Diaries''''' (Also known in English as '''The Writings of Jan Chryzostom Pasek, a Squire of the Commonwealth of Poland and Lithuania'''): Diaries (duh) of a 17th century nobleman, who, due to spending his life fighting in countless wars and even more quarrels with his neighbuors, traveled half the Europe and always had something to say about the things and people he saw. If you are yearning for your pike-and-shot, but also need some cavalryman crazy panache, look no further. Due to its writing style, it reads almost like an adventure novel and, as improbable as it seems at times, actually happened for real.
*'''''Antonio Pigafetta - Journal of Magellan's Voyage''''': A historical account of the first circumnavigation of the globe. Aside obvious historical value, it's worth to note Pigafetta wasn't an explorer himself or a member of the crew - he was a tourist, joining the expedition for the thrill of adventure and described everything from such perspective. Provides a lot of nautical and ethnographical observations, creating a panorama for Age of Discovery.
*'''''Marco Polo - The Million''''': The seminal travelogue of an Italian explorer as he travelled the breadth of Middle East and Asia all the way to China and back again during the height of the Middle Ages. While there is some question as to the accuracy of the work, scholars today agree that generally speaking the accounts are as accurate as can be expected for the time period.
*'''''Sunzi - The Art of War''''': The Codex Astartes of ancient China dating back to the Spring and Autumn period. Essentially a "How to Wage Wars for Dummies" guidebook and trivial from modern perspective - which doesn't stop people from gushing how brilliant it is and making it one of the most mis-quoted books in human literature<ref>To be fair to Sunny Boy, (1) he was writing in a period when virtually no such books existed, and (2) most of his advice is still sound.</ref>. Most editions contain more commentaries than there is actual Sun Tzu writing in them.
*'''''Publius Cornelius Tacitus - The Annals''''': A Roman historical account of the time from Augustus' death in 14 AD. to the reign of Emperor Nero. Although fragmented as hell (as the overwhelming majority of ancient literature is), it is one of the most important sources on how the Roman Empire survived and gained permanency after its charismatic founder Octavian-Augustus died. It is generally regarded as being one of the finest works of Roman history that has survived, as well as containing one of the only extra-biblical accounts of Jesus, alongside the writings of Flavius Josephus. Tacitus is especially appreciated for his penetrating insights into power politics, so think of him as a proto-Machiavelli in far more readable prose.
*'''''Thucydides - History of the Peloponnesian War''''': Happens right before The Anabasis, covering roughly two decades of warfare between Athens and Sparta, in varying degrees of detail depending on the sources Thucydides had access to at the time (he was exiled from Athens and switched sides mid-war). Trails off at the end, presumably he died writing it. Basically the oldest human text in existence that is regarded as a historical account to be taken at face value, and it inspired many other leaders such as Xenophon and later Julius Caesar to write accounts of their own deeds.
*'''''Xenophon - The Anabasis''''': Another historical account, this time of the journey of 10,000 Greek mercenaries (hence the other title - ''The March of the Ten Thousand'') who end up stranded in the middle of Persian Empire after their employer, Cyrus the Younger, got killed in the battle. Problem is, Cyrus was trying to overthrown his brother, king Artaxerxes II, using said Greeks. So now they are in the middle of hostile territory, with no means to resupply, no support and constantly endangered by Persian military and tributary locals. Due to Xenophon's writing style, the book is highly entertaining and action-packed, while also providing countless descriptions of both Greek and Persian customs. And if you wonder why the plot sounds familiar - you probably saw "The Warriors".

==Shunned/Hated==
*'''Terry <del>Good</del>Badkind - The Sword of Truth''': An infamous series full of Terry's [[magical realm]] BDSM, utterly gratuitous rape and torture (Terry's cheap/lazy method of making his main characters look better by comparison), and "heroes" we're supposed to arbitrarily like no matter ''what'' horrible things they do. Badkind himself having nothing but contempt for the entire fantasy genre while bragging about how he is a "serious" novelist and packing the later books with his stupid Ayn Ranting (even when it ''contradicted previous fucking events'') did him no favours.
*'''Stephanie Meyer - [[Twilight]]:''' ...Have you ''been'' on the internet? The series that single-handedly killed an [[Vampire: The Masquerade| entire style of modern fantasy vampire]] for an entire generation of fantasy fans who ''aren't'' sexually-frustrated housewives and/or hormone-addled teenage girls. Though it's a bit old hat to bring up the series with any seriousness, doing so will irritate the scars of bitter neckbeards.
*'''John Norman - [[Gor (John Norman)]]''': A cheap knockoff of Barsoom and Conan made notable (as the series goes on) for having a lot of half baked philosophizing, skeevy BSDM stuff and [[/d/|a ton of fucked up ideas about gender, slavery and sex]]. In brief a bunch of bug aliens make a zoo full of humans to live "as nature intended" as misogynistic slaving barbarians and make sure of it [[wat|by incinerating anyone who attempts to develop technology or societies they don't approve of with laser beams. Which they sometimes do to whole cities just for the lulz]]. Also for spawning one of the ''original'' obnoxious apologist Internet subcultures, the Goreans. Spread to Second Life, so go there if you want to burn your brain.
*'''Christopher Paolini - [[Eragon|The Inheritance Series]]:''' A Mary Sue main character and a derivative plot. It was written when Paolini was a teenager and it shows. Every single book could stand to lose at ''least'' a third of its wordcount and there are lot of times when the plot grinds to a halt for entire chapters just for the characters to think and ramble about the most inane of topics. Less offensive than other stuff on this list since it lacks traits such as bootlick fans and an asshole author. The author also put a decent amount of effort into his worldbuilding which is more than can be said for Badkind and Smeyer. If you must, start in book two and read his cousin's story, he is a farm boy who was getting his dick wet while struggling with a hostile father-in-law, until the civil war reached his hometown and his betrothed is whisked away by humanoid bug-birds, he then murders 200 people with a hammer and deals with PTSD.

=Gallery=
<gallery>
Image:Approved Children's Literature.png|Kid-tested, fa/tg/uy-approved.
</gallery>

=Other Recommendations=
*[http://desuarchive.org/tg/thread/27995546/ Fatguys briefly exit their basement comfort zone to recommend /tg/ romance novels.]
*[https://www.goodreads.com/list/show/109337._tg_approved_reading_list /tg/'s approved reading list on Goodreads]

[[Category:Approved Media]]
[[Category:Literature]]

Stormhawk

2022-06-01T14:41:01Z

2001:8003:1C20:8C00:5D2D:793E:FBA7:711:

[[File:99120101152_AdeptusAstartesStormHawkInterceptor01.jpg|300px|thumb|right|Really, GW? Really? You’re stealing ideas from converters now?]]
The '''Stormhawk''', or Stormhawk Interceptor, is the slightly less retarded and more heavily armed cousin of the infamous flying toaster, the [[Stormtalon]]. Despite being more practically designed for a Space Marine jetplane, the Stormhawk is by no means [[Original character, do not steal|original]]; the Stormhawk has been accused of stealing the ideas of converted and customized Stormtalons due to the latter's retardation. On top of that, it still looks like a GDI Orca, just a Tiberium Wars-era one instead of a Tiberium Dawn-era one (though of course [[Kane]] ''would'' be the kind of person who could be one of the Emperor's many guises, so perhaps he was just taking a good idea from old nemeses, just like how he borrowed from GDI's superheavy tank boner). This has produced some [[RAGE]] at [[Games Workshop]] for [[Fail|'stooping to ripping off the designs of their customers']]. (Though really, the only ''serious'' problem with that is that they didn't credit the converters. Would anyone be objecting if they had hired them for 'Eavy Metal? [[Warhammer Plus|Yes, yes they would be.]])

The Stormhawk is meant to improve on the Stormtalon by having more frontal armor to cover the fragile cockpit and having a [[Dakka|ridiculous array of firepower]] for a fighter no bigger than a family car. It is also built to be dedicated interceptor rather than a gunship, and is meant to excel at aerial superiority - a position that the Stormhawk can apparently only be comfortable with after almost every other space marine aircraft was nerfed to only be effective against ground targets. So, in typical GW fashion, you ''need'' the damn thing now. Oh, wait, since fighters can't shoot effectively at ground targets, [[RAGE|you actually need ''both'' the Stormhawk ''and'' the Stormtalon now]].

== Tabletop ==

Ranting and accusations aside, the Stormhawk boasts respectable stats and firepower. It has Front AV 12 and the same Ceramite Shielding as the Storm Talon, but lost strafing run and hover in exchange for the increased agility of supersonic. It comes stock with TL [[Assault Cannon]]s, a [[Las-Talon]] (basically a [[Lascannon]] with twice the shots at half the range) that can be exchanged for an [[Icarus Stormcannon Array]] and TL [[Heavy Bolter]]s that can be upgraded to [[Skyhammer Missile Launcher|Skyhammer]]/[[Typhoon Missile Launcher]]s (Typhoon negates a lot of drawbacks). It also comes with a new piece of equipment called the [[Infernum Halo Launcher]] to re-roll failed jink-saves. The Stormhawk can be kitted out to either pump out a lot of shots at mediocre AP or fewer but stronger high AP shots. Unfortunately, it is only BS3 against non-flyer/skimmer units now, thanks to the new flyer rules. You can run up to 4 in a single FA slot, without needing to keep coherency, unless of course you wanted to.

The 8th edition version of this ripoff conversion made it actually cheaper to field with a [[what|slightly better payload]]. It's a dedicated flyer, so it lacks it's potato cousins' anti-ground capabilities in exchange for a default airborne weapon, and the inability to fly low. New rules allows it to shoot 3 different weapons at 3 different targets at the same time. Let's remember, this fella has 2 dedicated anti-air weapons, and 2 fixed assault cannons plus a sweet Anti-Air bonus. However, it can still be fitted to hit anything in the air, as well as on the ground AND after moving, with only a -1 BS penalty. The only other penalty is being forced to move a minimum distance to keep from crashing, though most land-based shooters will have a -1 penalty to BS because it's Supersonic. Overall, it's a slightly better Landspeeder.

== Battlefleet Gothic Armada 1 & 2 ==

In Battlefleet Gothic Armada 1 & 2, Space Marine Stormhawks are your standard-issue fighters. It has the same stats as the [[Fury Interceptor]]s, so there is nothing much to talk about this fighter.
[[Category: Flyers]]

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