2d4chan - User contributions [en]

Bear Lore

2019-04-15T08:00:06Z

2001:8003:22BD:8800:3C83:A55A:7FEC:1F72: /* Other Lore */

[[Image:Bear lore.png|thumb|right|300px|We're not even making this shit up.]]
What's that? A large, [[furry]], [[Angry Bear|aggressive]] animal has just interrupted your party? '''BEAR LORE''' TIME!

The Bear Lore [[meme]] started right when the [[4e|4th edition]] core books were leaked online. After paging through them, someone found a chart for "bear lore" which had dc checks to find out stupefyingly obvious things about bears. Someone posted this on /tg/ and there were many [[Rage|lulz]] to be had as people continued to talk about what else there is to learn about bears, among other things. The meme originated here: http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/1839136/

== Nature Check ==
''A character knows the following information with a successful Nature Check:''

*DC15: Cave bears live in caves.

*DC20: Dire bears like to attack with their natural weapons.

For the same DC regarding manticores, you get to know it has 3 rows of teeth and that it can speak common and that it can be tricked easily.

== Religion Check ==
''Alternatively, a Religion check on bears provides the following:''

*DC15: Bears do not attend any continuous services of worship. They are ready to kill at all hours of the week.

*DC20: They mysteriously vanish every winter, perhaps to give reverence to their perverse fertility goddess while gorging on the souls of men lost to famine.

*DC25: Bear society has no visibly ordained clerics.

*DC35: SHIT, NEVERMIND, THEY HAVE THEM, RUN.

== Other Lore ==

'''Bee Lore'''

A character knows the following information with a successful Nature check.

*DC15: [[Bees]] generally live in hives or trees.

*DC20: NO!! NOT THE BEES! NOT THE BEES!!! AAGGH!!! THEY'RE IN MY EYES! AAAGGGGHHH!!1!

*DC25: I'M COVERED IN BEEEEEEES!!!!!!!!! (-10 to all seduction checks)

*DC35: [[meme|It’s hip to FUCK BEES]] (+15 to all bee seduction checks)

'''Fire Lore'''

A character knows the following information with a successful Nature check.

*DC10: Fire is hot.

*DC15: Fire cannot go through walls. It's not ghosts, stupid.

*DC20: Only YOU can prevent forest fires.

*DC25: If you were smart enough not to touch fire, you'd not NEED the stop-drop-roll info, and if you touched the fire, it's too late to make that check now. Enjoy burning to death!

*DC30: IT'S FUCKIN' HOT IN HERE.

*DC35: [[/tv/|The fire rises.]]

*DC 40: We didn't start the fire.

'''Water Lore'''

A character knows the following information with a successful Nature check.

*DC10: Pyros don't like water.

*DC15: Ice water is cold.

*DC20: You can drink water.

*DC25: Humans might not be able to use it to breathe.

'''Fuzzy Wozzie Lore'''

A character knows the following information with a successful [[Meme]] check.

*DC15: Fuzzy Wozzie was a bear.

*DC20: Fuzzy Wozzie had no hair.

*DC25: Fuzzy Wozzie wasn't fuzzy was he?

'''Cliff Lore'''

A character knows the following information with a successful Geography check.

*DC15: Cliffs usually live at the edge of things.

*DC20: If you walk off a cliff, you will be hurt.

*DC25: All of the [[Fags of 4chan#Fag|gods]] know that 4th edition sucks and urge you to jump and end it all.

'''Spy Lore'''

A character knows the following information with a successful [[/v/]] check.

*DC15: The knife in your back was placed by a Spy.

*DC20: [[GENTLEMEN]].

*DC25: That's your blood on his suit.

*DC35: I was a Spy all along.

*DC40: He never really was on our side.

*DC45: The best Spy is a dead one.

*DC50: NEVERMIND, HE'S GOT A DEAD-RINGER.

*DC60: Hail Hydra.

'''Human Lore'''

*DC10: They are squishy.

*DC20: They're bastards most of the time.

*DC30: HOLY SWINGING FUCK, THEY LIVE IN CITIES?

'''Heavy Lore'''

A character knows the following information with a successful [[/v/]] check.

*DC15: Sandvich.

*DC20: Heavies hate Scouts.

*DC25: Heavies love Medics.

*DC30: Heavy has a [[Assault Cannon|minigun]].

*DC35: Minigun kills Scouts dead.

*DC40: Heavy eats Sandvich.

'''Creed Lore'''

Wait, there's no such lore, how did this one- [[Creed|CREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEED!!!]]

'''Pyro Lore'''

A character knows the following information with a successful [[/v/]] check.

*DC20: Pyros hate spies.

*DC25: Pyro has a [[Flamer|flamethrower]].

*DC30: Flamethrower kills spies dead.

*DC40: Pyros like Fire. Brush up on your Fire Lore.

'''Dark Lore'''

A character knows the following information with a successful Nature check.

*DC10: It's dark in here.

*DC15: You may be [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4nigRT2KmCE| eaten by a grue.]

*DC20: OM NOM NOM NOM NOM.

*DC25: Shoulda brought a candle.

*DC30: Dark congregates around [[grimdark|Grim]].

*DC45: [[Cthulhu|SHIIIIIT! I MUST GET OUT OF HERE!]]

'''Scout Lore'''

A character already knows this information because this guy can't keep his trap shut. Roll anyways

*DC10: He's not even winded.

*DC15: He ran fast and died a [[Macha|virgin]].

*DC20: BONK!

*DC25: He's a force a' nature.

*DC30: If you were from where he was from, you'd be fucking dead.

*DC35: NEEDADISPENSAHHEAH!!!

'''Tzeentch Lore'''

A character cannot know the following information[[Just as planned|.]]

*DC10: [[Tzeentch]] likes birds.

*DC20: Tzeentch makes plans.

*DC25: Just as planned.

*DC30: Just as planned.

*DC35: These dice are loaded, and will roll exactly what Tzeentch wants you to roll.

*DC99: [[Just as planned]].

'''Engineer Lore'''

A character knows the following information with a successful Science check.

*DC10: [[Meme|Nope.avi]]

*DC15: A Spy's sappin' his Sentry!

*DC20: His Dispenser's goin' up.

*DC25: Engineer is makin' bacon.

*DC30: Engineer uses [[Dakka|more gun]].

*DC35: Sometimes you just need a little less gun.

'''Box Lore'''

A character knows the following information with a successful Knowledge check.

*DC 10: Enemies favor metal boxes for concealment.

*DC 20: Particularly foolish and cowardly enemies also like to hide IN MEHTAL BAWKSES.

*DC 25: To maximize combat effectiveness, take away their metal boxes.

*DC 35: SINDRIIIIIIIIII!

'''Medic Lore'''

A character knows the following information with a successful Science check.

*DC10: He is ZHE ÜBERMENSCH!

*DC15: Ribs don't grow back.

*DC20: Can you feel zhe Schadenfreude?

*DC25: He is fully charged.

*DC25: OKTOBERFEEEEEEEEST!!!

'''Economy Lore'''

A character knows the following information with a successful [[Horo|Business]] check.

*DC10: The state of the economy is excellent.

*DC15: There is a problem with Fannie Mae.

*DC20: OMG!

*DC25: You can purchase "The Republic of Iceland" on eBay for $229.99 (inc. VAT).

*DC35: Economy is a planning game. [[Just as planned|And you've lost already.]]

'''Plan Lore'''

*DC10: Make a Plan.

*DC15: Carry out Plan.

*DC20: ????????????

*DC25: PROFIT!

*DC99: Tzeentch made your plan, and gave it to you without you knowing about it. [[Just as planned]].

*DC100 Wait, what happened to Tzeentch's plan... [[Creed|CREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEED!]]

'''Nebbish Lore'''

A character knows the following information with a successful [[Neckbeard]] check.

*DC20: Being unknowingly nebbish is annoying.

*DC25: Being deliberately annoying is nebbish.

*DC35: GTFO!

'''Cat Lore'''

A character knows the following information with a successful Nature check.

*DC10: Ceiling cat is watching you masturbate.

*DC15: Cats eat mice.

*DC20: Cats hate you. No exceptions.

*DC35: Cats can sometimes be [[Furry|Girls]].

*DC40: Nekos are the best cats.

'''[[Hat]] Lore'''

A character knows the following information with a successful Irish check.

*DC15: Hats live on hatracks, or people's heads.

*DC20: Hats can be used as a drinking apparatus.

*DC25: Casey wore his brand new hat to Murphy's wake last night. [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FSk0SxaXgbw Someone stole his hat and, boy, it started up a fight.]

*DC30: Hats, Beards, and Sweden [[Minecraft|go well together]].

*DC40: Commissars wear hats. Don't tell anyo[[*BLAM*]]

*DC45: Team Fortress 2 is a game about hats.

'''Internet Lore'''

A character knows the following information with a successful Computers check.

*DC10: The internet is for porn.

*DC15: The internet is not a big truck.

*DC20: The internet is a series of tubes.

*DC35: Skynet has been born, and has sent robot killers back in time to terminate you.

*DC40: You're on the internet right now!

'''Doge Lore'''

A character knows the following information with a successful Nature check.

*DC15: Such fur

*DC20: So popular

*DC25: Very great

*DC30: Wow

'''Abaddon Lore'''

A character knows the following information with a successful Nature check.

*DC15: Abaddon is the Warmaster of Chaos.

*DC20: Abaddon has no arms.

*DC25: Abaddon is a(n) (armless) failure.

*D30: "CREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEED!!!!!"

'''[[Dwarf Fortress]] Lore'''

A character knows the following information with a successful Computers check.

*DC10: Press ? to see help.

*DC15: Not /.

*DC20: This game is technically in 3D.

*DC30: The red stuff is blood.

*DC35: Blood from your most useful dwarf being shanked in the face.

*DC40: That "g" did it.

*DC60: The "g"s are goblins, and there's more of them.

*DC500: You can set up a basic military like so...

'''Ork lore'''

*DC10:WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH

*DC15: DAKKA

*DC20: STUPID BEEKIEZ

*DC25: I'Z DA BIGGEST BOSS AROUND!!!!

*DC30: EVERYONE KNOWZ GREEN IZ BEST

'''Chaos Spawn''' Lore

A character knows the following information with a successful Nature check.

DC10: Saying "Chaos Spawn" will OH SH- '''GRAJIRAGJEARJGEA'''
DC20: Chaos s- those guys are created when someone either says their name, or fails their dark master
DC30: Chaos Spawn are '''ADSAFDSARGRAAA''' ahem, chaos aligned

=='''Gallery'''==
<gallery>
Image:CAVEBEAR.JPG|Cave bears live in caves.
Image:Bearclaw.jpg|A bear and its natural weapon.
Image:Manvsbear.jpg|BEAR LORE: LEARN IT.
Image:Bear_cavalry.jpg‎|Another reason take Bear Lore as a feat.
Image:Neckbear.jpg|What happens when poor spelling, [[neckbeard]]s, and failed DC15 checks collide
</gallery>

==See Also==
*[[Bear cavalry]]
*[[Bear trap]]
*[[Angry Bear]]
[[Category:Dungeons & Dragons]]
[[Category:RAGE]]
[[category:meme]]

Flak Armor

2019-04-15T07:38:43Z

2001:8003:22BD:8800:3C83:A55A:7FEC:1F72: Ah yes, because Guard Command Squads can take Heavy Stubbers....wait a minute...

[[image:IG Flak Armor.jpg|thumb|350px|right|Arguably the most common type of flak armor in the 40k universe, based off the Cadian Shock Troopers standard gear. Noticeably lacking in the wiener department]]

'''Flak Armour''' is the most common form of [[Armor]] employed by the [[Imperium of Man]] and especially the [[Imperial Guard]]. Cheap and easy to make and manufacture by the average Imperial world, it is composed of multiple layers of ablative material, shock resistant material and ballistic textiles. Fairly similar to modern body armor in regards of rough construction, though the materials are more advanced. It is resistant to shrapnel and stab attacks done by human combatants armed with regular knife while offering pretty good protection against bullets from [[Stubber|combustion guns]] and glancing hits from directed energy weapons comparable in power to a [[Lasgun]].

== How Good Is It? ==
For example, modern Earth ballistic vests, constructed from Aramids like Kevlar, are either light weight vests that provide reasonable protection only against shrapnel and weaker rounds, such as .45 and 9mm, up to .357 or poor penetrating (will stop a shotgun slug but cracked and broken ribs at most, bruising like Mike Tyson punched you at the least), or equip heavier armour inserts that provide more coverage, or possibly a little less and withstand more powerful rounds, all the way up to armour piercing sniper rounds (assuming the wearer has some sort of steel or ceramic insert, and that also gives 3-10 shots from modern assault rifles.)

With Flak armour gives a chance to not only survive a couple of impacts from from a light machine gun, or several from autoguns, but to remain in a shape to continue fighting (assuming it hits the chest piece), all while not weighing down the soldier significantly. When dealing with a local rebellion or facing pirates, bandits, [[Necromunda|hive-gangsters]] or the rag tag forces of the [[lost and the damned]], a suit of flak armour is an [[Emperor]]send and often means the difference between survival and a gruesome death. After all, it's said that any stubber at and below rifle caliber will ([[skub|supposedly]]) not pierce any part of the Flak Armour. So, in theory, Flak Armor makes you much harder to cut down, and fluffwise, it has also been said a laspistol will not defeat the chest armor. There is one thing to note: A WH40k [[Autogun]] fires bigger rounds than a modern earth Battle Rifle, or LMG. They fire 8.25mm bullets, and this, again, is stopped by Flak. This means the average IG issued gear will take sniper shots with the user surviving. It does beg the question of how big LMGs are in WH40k (real life LMGs use bullets only a bit larger than assault rifles or rather the same size as some nation's assault rifle bullets, so 40K LMGs probably use bullets similar in size to those of their normal rifles).

Note that autoguns are to stubbers what Mass Effect guns are to modern small arms (and can be anything from caseless ammo to rail or gauss automatic weapons to rifles using gravity manipulating technology) and stubbers other than handcannons and heavy stubbers are outright incapable of penetrating flak armor at any range and from any angle and this also extends to the flak shirt and flak pants worn by tunnel rat regiments and potentially what is worn under the armor of all Guardsmen. Flak armor and lasguns are almost uniquely used by the Imperial Guard whereas nearly all rebels and cultists they fight use either mesh armor, armor weave, or nothing and usually wield stubbers and maybe a few autoguns. Since about eighty percent of the Guard only ever fights rebels and cultists, this makes the average Guardsman practically a Space Marine to his normal enemies which is part of the reason why flak armor and lasgun are standard issue instead of carapace or powered armor. There simply is no point in spending the money to issue better weapons and armor when you're practically invulnerable and invincible to your normal enemies already. When there is something like a WAAAGH!!! or Black Crusade or whatever else, just throw more men at it and lots and lots of tanks and artillery. Since the average Guardsman is nearly invincible against the average rebel or cultist, there are many armored and artillery regiments available to throw at space horrors. It all works out pretty well unless you're one of the ground pounders who has to keep pressure on an anti-tank position while being shredded by anti-infantry you also have to keep busy while your own heavy support gets into position without being killed so they can save your ass so the tanks can come and kill everything. But hey, that's what conscripts are for. Literally.

Also, keep in mind that most aliens the Imperium fights are less advanced than the Imperium. Usually, flak armor and lasgun is sufficient even without overwhelming numbers. Basically, ninety percent of the time the Imperial Guard is to the alien threat of the day what the Tau are to the Imperial Guard (but with more tank and less weeaboo) combined with overwhelming numbers. They really only face a challenge when fighting a true Chaos invasion, Tyranids, Necrons, Orks, and whatever flavor of Eldar (or a minor xenos faction advanced enough like the Fra'al or Tau, which is very rare). Ultimately, the average Guardsman is no joke.

== Why It Kinda Sucks ==
That said, when it comes to protecting its user from guns which shoot [[Bolter|.75, or (19.05mm) APHE rocket bullets]], [[Shuriken Catapult|hyper-sonic monomolecular ninja star assault rifles]], [[Plasma|bolts of compressed plasma]] as hot as a star's core designed to penetrate tank armor, and similar, they are of little more use than a common T-shirt. Of course, if they miss, and <s>shrapnel</s> debris (shrapnel is fragments thrown out like from anti-air artillery) is thrown, the armor will probably save you, which is it's purpose anyway.

Flak armour is also fairly cost efficient; it offers some protection in combat while costing less to produce, ship, and maintain than the soldier wearing it. This becomes less true as the armour becomes more complex.

The next grade up is [[Carapace Armor]]. Which is actually a very large leap in quality.
{{Template:40k-Imperial-Weapons}}
[[category:warhammer 40,000]]

Attilan Rough Riders

2019-04-15T07:18:36Z

2001:8003:22BD:8800:3C83:A55A:7FEC:1F72: /* Modelling */

[[File:Atillan Rough Rider.jpg|300px|thumb|right|That explosive-tipped spear is going right up your dick.]]{{Stub}}
{{Topquote|I would say that was the cavalry, but... I've never seen a line of horses crash into the battlefield from outer space before.|Agent Washington, Red vs. Blue: Revelation}}

The Attilan Roughriders are a mounted cavalry [[Imperial Guard]] unit originating from the planet of Attila. They are, quite unsurprisingly, Hun warriors in SPESS. This actually makes sense. After all, if the people from the Steppes of Asia people settled a planet, they'd likely want to name it after someone/something important to their history. You don't have to be a genius to realize it'd be Attila the Hun. As for the whole "Hun" theme they've got going... you'd want to keep your culture alive, too, right? Anyway, they are fierce warriors, born in the saddle (and more than likely dying in it). While they can be deployed en masse, they are more often than not assigned in small units to other regiments that can make use of their swift flanking abilities, but are more often to be used for indirect uses, message runners, scouts, anti insurgency, insurgents, the minds the limit on their uses outside of direct tabletop combat. In battle they employ foul tempered horses built like tanks (and sometimes incorporating parts from them) and use explosive-tipped lances to fuck up your shit.

The [[Only War]] supplement <i>Hammer of the Emperor</i> also gives a slightly unnerving fact about these guys: If they ever run into a point where they can't find edible food or water, and they have their steeds, they manage to make some bizarre sort of slurry involving their steed's blood. Again, they're keeping with the <s>Hun</s> Mongol theme. One can only wonder the effects of this when you have a robotic steed.

== Modelling ==

They are the vanilla cavalry (even called Rough Riders) for Imperial Guard forces and as such are never seen on the tabletop. Attilan Rough Riders are out of production and can now only be found in the dark recesses of Ebay. Only option? Convert your own, fool. Warhammer Fantasy can probably help you with the horses, though some guys try a more 'mech' theme and proxy them as bikers.

Victoria Miniatures make [http://victoriaminiatures.highwire.com/product/rough-rider-legs-x5 Rough Rider Legs] that meld really nicely with the Cadian Shock Troopers torsos and the various torsos that are available elsewhere on their site. They also make [http://victoriaminiatures.highwire.com/product/rough-rider-arms arms with lances]. Other than that, you're on your own!

Literally just buy the Warhammer Fantasy Outrider/Pistolier set; they come with guns, which you can replace with laspistols if you want.

If you play Tallarn then a cheap option could be Haradrim Raiders from GW. Just a thought.

Ironically, despite being OOP, they're possibly the best choice for filling compulsory FA slots in 8th.

{{Template:40k-Imperial-Regiments}}
[[Category:Warhammer 40,000]][[Category:Imperial]]