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Talos Pain Engine

2021-01-31T05:09:46Z

2406:3400:20F:FFC0:91A4:8232:D3C0:65CB:

[[File:TalosEngine.jpg|450px|right|thumb|Those [[Sisters of Battle|Sisters]] [[Rape|are not going to have a fun time.]]]]
Oh boy, you thought the [[Dark Eldar]] have reached rock bottom? Well as the saying goes, "In Commoragh, there ''is'' no rock bottom," for the DE have outdone themselves yet again. Ladies and gentlemen, meet the '''Talos Pain Engine''', the most widespread of the Dark Eldar's many so-called Engines of Pain. Festooned with multiple surgical apparatus and grotesque weapons of war, the Talos is a part organic and part mechanical device conceived by the creations of a mad/insane genius AKA those fucking [[Haemonculus |Haemonculi again.]] Like all things Dark Eldar, the Talos was first constructed as a torture device, but is now deployed across the galaxy's innumerable battlefields.

The Talos moves with the aid of anti-gravitic motors as it sweeps across the battlefield, its unique sting wildly spews death in all directions and its many-bladed arms cut through armour and bone alike with lashing blows. If the Talos catches a victim in its array of claws, it either immediately incinerates them or rapidly vivisects and dismembers them with an array of manipulators, scalpel-keen claws and surgically sharp tools. Of course, the fate of those caught within the death-grip of a Talos does not end with death. The remnants of its dissected victims are drawn into itself to be used in the creation of potions, poisons and elixirs. The pain and death spasms of the victims invigorate the Talos and propel it towards its enemies. Dark Eldar being Dark Eldar, the Talos' wanton displays of Hellraiser-level torture are extremely amusing to its owner.

Seriously the Talos make everything from [[Chaos]] including the [[Daemonculaba]] look like pushovers in comparison. Amp up your game, Chaos.
[[File:DE_Talos.jpg|200px|left|thumb|What the Talos used to look like.]]
[[File:Talos 5th ed.jpg|200px|left|thumb|How they look now, in all its rapey glory]]

The standard Talos is armed with an array of torture devices. This includes twin-linked Splinter Cannons that can be swapped with Stinger Pods, the latter of which fire pulses of [[Wat|"raw agony"]]; alternatively it may be equipped with Twin-linked Haywire Blasters and Twin-linked Heat Lances as well as one or two Close combat weapons. The CCWs can themselves be swapped with Ichor Injectors which are used to inject their foe with the Talos's own boiling ichor, an effect that causes enemies to explode. The Talos may also be equipped with Chain-Flails which can be used to slash and entangle enemies. Lastly the Talos can also be armed with a Twin-linked Liquefier Gun that melts enemies.

Prior to the 5th edition revamp of Dark Eldar the Talos looked like a comical version of a [[Brass Scorpion]] [[Fail|of Fail]] as seen during [[Dawn of War|Dawn of War Soulstorm.]] Nowadays the new, drastically more awesome Talos model [[Rape|rapes the Brass Scorpion in its metallic ass.]]

== Variations ==

Of course the Talos is just one variety of Pain Engines. There are countless flavors to choose from but here are the most identifiable ones by the Imperium.

*'''Chaingoul''' - The Chaingoul is a clanking, cumbersome Engine of Pain favored by the Dark Eldar Haemonculi Coven called the Prophets of Flesh.
*'''Shrivener''' - The Shrivener is a drill-legged Pain Engine used to guard facilities of the Haemonculi Coven known as the Everspiral.
*'''Flayer''' - A Flayer is a smaller variant of the Talos. Even though it is smaller than the other variants of Talos Pain Engines, it bears the same malevolence and thirst for blood and screams as its larger counterparts.

[[Category: Warhammer 40,000]]

[[Category: Xenos]]

[[Category: Eldar]]

[[Category: Dark Eldar]]

[[Category: Megafauna]]

[[Category: Skimmers]]

{{Template:Dark Eldar-Forces}}

Talos Pain Engine

2021-01-31T05:08:38Z

2406:3400:20F:FFC0:91A4:8232:D3C0:65CB:

[[File:TalosEngine.jpg|450px|right|thumb|Those [[Sisters of Battle|Sisters]] [[Rape|are not going to have a fun time.]]]]
Oh boy, you thought the [[Dark Eldar]] have reached rock bottom? Well as the saying goes, "In Commoragh, there ''is'' no rock bottom," for the DE have outdone themselves yet again. Ladies and gentlemen, meet the '''Talos Pain Engine''', the most widespread of the Dark Eldar's many so-called Engines of Pain. Festooned with multiple surgical apparatus and grotesque weapons of war, the Talos is a part organic and part mechanical device conceived by the creations of a mad/insane genius AKA those fucking [[Haemonculus |Haemonculi again.]] Like all things Dark Eldar, the Talos was first constructed as a torture device, but is now deployed across the galaxy's innumerable battlefields.

The Talos moves with the aid of anti-gravitic motors as it sweeps across the battlefield, its unique sting wildly spews death in all directions and its many-bladed arms cut through armour and bone alike with lashing blows. If the Talos catches a victim in its array of claws, it either immediately incinerates them or rapidly vivisects and dismembers them with an array of manipulators, scalpel-keen claws and surgically sharp tools. Of course, the fate of those caught within the death-grip of a Talos does not end with death. The remnants of its dissected victims are drawn into itself to be used in the creation of potions, poisons and elixirs. The pain and death spasms of the victims invigorate the Talos and propel the Talos towards its enemies. Dark Eldar being Dark Eldar, the Talos' wanton displays of Hellraiser-level torture are extremely amusing to its owner.

Seriously the Talos make everything from [[Chaos]] including the [[Daemonculaba]] look like pushovers in comparison. Amp up your game, Chaos.
[[File:DE_Talos.jpg|200px|left|thumb|What the Talos used to look like.]]
[[File:Talos 5th ed.jpg|200px|left|thumb|How they look now, in all its rapey glory]]

The standard Talos is armed with an array of torture devices. This includes twin-linked Splinter Cannons that can be swapped with Stinger Pods, the latter of which fire pulses of [[Wat|"raw agony"]]; alternatively it may be equipped with Twin-linked Haywire Blasters and Twin-linked Heat Lances as well as one or two Close combat weapons. The CCWs can themselves be swapped with Ichor Injectors which are used to inject their foe with the Talos's own boiling ichor, an effect that causes enemies to explode. The Talos may also be equipped with Chain-Flails which can be used to slash and entangle enemies. Lastly the Talos can also be armed with a Twin-linked Liquefier Gun that melts enemies.

Prior to the 5th edition revamp of Dark Eldar the Talos looked like a comical version of a [[Brass Scorpion]] [[Fail|of Fail]] as seen during [[Dawn of War|Dawn of War Soulstorm.]] Nowadays the new, drastically more awesome Talos model [[Rape|rapes the Brass Scorpion in its metallic ass.]]

== Variations ==

Of course the Talos is just one variety of Pain Engines. There are countless flavors to choose from but here are the most identifiable ones by the Imperium.

*'''Chaingoul''' - The Chaingoul is a clanking, cumbersome Engine of Pain favored by the Dark Eldar Haemonculi Coven called the Prophets of Flesh.
*'''Shrivener''' - The Shrivener is a drill-legged Pain Engine used to guard facilities of the Haemonculi Coven known as the Everspiral.
*'''Flayer''' - A Flayer is a smaller variant of the Talos. Even though it is smaller than the other variants of Talos Pain Engines, it bears the same malevolence and thirst for blood and screams as its larger counterparts.

[[Category: Warhammer 40,000]]

[[Category: Xenos]]

[[Category: Eldar]]

[[Category: Dark Eldar]]

[[Category: Megafauna]]

[[Category: Skimmers]]

{{Template:Dark Eldar-Forces}}

Harlequin

2021-01-31T04:38:21Z

2406:3400:20F:FFC0:91A4:8232:D3C0:65CB: /* The Final Act, A.K.A. The Last Troll */

[[File:Eldar Harlequin.jpg|thumb|Break a leg? Why limit myself?]]

{{Topquote|I used to think that my life was a tragedy, but now I realize, it’s a fucking comedy.|Arthur Fleck - Joker (2019)}}

The '''Harlequins''' are galactic clowns. Or more accurately, galactic thespians. Or even more accurately, galactic Juggalos. They are the [[Eldar]] followers of [[Cegorach]], the Laughing God. They are the performers and entertainers of the Eldar, the self-appointed protectors of the Eldar's pre-[[Fall of the Eldar|Fall]] history, which they perform in extremely elaborate plays involving not only elaborate costumes, scenery, acrobatics, and a troupe of dedicated actors, but further elaboration of the drama through [[Psyker|psykana]] and [[Drugs|psychedelic drugs]] which are disseminated throughout the audience that they too may see into clown world. The end result is something like a deranged mixture of a bardic recitation of oral history, a circus, grimdark edgy performance art, elaborate spiritual exercise, and a Grateful Dead concert, dedicated to reenacting and expressing the story of the fall of the Eldar, as both elegy and warning.

Far from being merely performers, though, and despite their rather ludicrous appearance, they are in fact some of the most dangerous shock-troopers among the Eldar, taking the concept of "break a leg" as far as you would expect in [[Warhammer 40,000]]. As self-appointed keepers of history, in addition to reciting and propagating it through performance art, they also maintain and guard the collection of esoteric knowledge deep in the Webway in the hidden [[Black Library]], protecting it from [[Ahzek Ahriman|those who would attempt]] to enter and learn of forbidden lore which they might use for evil and the furtherance of goals of [[Chaos]]. The Harlequins' protection of the Library is almost impenetrable, but they will from time to time allow those who have conquered the [[Chaos]] within them to enter. They have allowed Eldar, other xenos, and [[Just As Planned|even humans]] into the Library at times when their agenda is to fight against Chaos, but they will fight to the death to prevent the Chaotically aligned, or those vulnerable to corruption by Chaos, to enter.

In times of war, the Harlequins fight the foes they see as posing a threat to the very existence of the Eldar, first and foremost [[Chaos Space Marines]], the [[Necron]]s, and the [[Tyranids]]. The [[Imperium|Imperials]] and [[Tau]] can be worked with, and the [[Orks]] are easily manipulated; unlike most Eldar, the Harlequins are free of racial prejudice, so as long as you battle the threats to all things and aren't attacking them or getting in their way, they're perfectly happy to work with you be you Mon'Keigh or Blueberry. This makes them one of the most [[Reasonable Marines|level-minded]] factions in the setting and helps make them a very likeable faction, in contrast to the Craftworlders and Dark Eldar who are hated for being status quo-defending fairies and for being psychotic [[sick fuck]]s.

==The glue that keeps the Eldar together==
They owe no allegiance to any [[Craftworld]], Corsair Fleet, [[Exodite World]], or [[Dark Eldar]] [[Kabal]], but rather recruit members from all factions, and will fight in their armies on all sides. Their only loyalty is to [[Cegorach]], whom they believe has charged them with the "Great Work" of reunifying the Craftworld Eldar, Corsairs, Dark Eldar, and [[Exodite]] Eldar into a single race to fight off [[Slaanesh]], the Necrons, and whoever else has a bone to pick with the chosen people of the [[Old Ones]]. It is notable that they do not use the methods to keep their souls safe that other Eldar do—their faith in Cegorach, complete after going through the Trial to become a Harlequin, is enough to keep them safe. Despite this, they are allowed free passage through the Craftworlds and [[Commorragh]], because the Craftworld and Exodite Eldar respect the Harlequins for preserving their history, and the Dark Eldar and Corsairs <s>are ''too afraid'' to try and stop them</s> find Death Jesters' humor hilarious; they also couldn't keep the Harlequins out if they tried due to the Harlequins' superior knowledge of, and ability to use, the [[Webway]].

This also makes the Harlequins the closest thing to a central authority the Eldar species has. While the various Eldar factions may not necessarily answer to the clowns, when they speak, everyone from Commorragh pimps and Craftworld wizards to Exodite farmers and Corsair pirates stops what they're doing and '''listens'''. Even [[Asdrubael Vect]] has to make sure and pin it on someone else whenever he gets up to skullduggery that might piss them off.

== Eldar Ambassadors? ==
[[Image:Harlequin.jpg|They actually are this hot in the setting, but most people are too busy screaming in pain or fear to comment on it.|thumb|right]]
Harlequins do not necessarily restrict their visits to the Eldar. In the Harlequins' view, they must perform their work for anyone and everyone who may benefit and learn the lessons from The Fall. Thus it is very rare, but not unknown, for Harlequin troupes to visit Imperial worlds. However, it must be noted that given the Imperium's strict policy of xenophobia, the circumstances under which such visits occur almost always coincide with the absence of strict Imperial oversight.

Of course, given the inscrutable nature of Eldar language and art, it is highly debatable whether or not a human audience would even be able to grasp the message that a Harlequin performance was attempting to convey. Most accounts of Harlequin performances amount to something like splatterhouse Shakespeare, with chainsword wielding [[Coenobite]] clowns flinging psychedelic rainbow viscera while the audience trips out on peyote. On the other hand, it is conceivable that Harlequins adjust their performance based on the audience, keeping the performance elaborate in form, but simple in message, thus allowing humans to understand the Great Enemy and what can be done.

In any event, by the time Imperial authorities become fully aware of the presence of a Harlequin troupe, the xenos have inevitably departed. Given the isolated nature of many imperial worlds and the Imperial policy of enforced ignorance, most common inhabitants might find the harlequins as just another passing troupe of strange, incredibly skilled artists, unaware for the most part of their xenos nature. Furthermore, since harlequins only need a webway portal instead of say, a massive starship to get onto a world, no one really discovers they have been in a close encounter of the third kind, at least until some Ordo Xenos operative takes notice. Thus, while in theory Harlequins (as xenos) are not welcome on Imperial worlds, in practice the Imperium can generally do little to stop such visitations.

Another explanation is that while the Ordo Xenos may not be fans, the Ordo Malleus is fully aware that the Eldar know more about Chaos than they do, and that the Harlequins fight Chaos as agents of the Black Library. The Inquisition's desire to obtain that knowledge is therefore probably enough to make them pressure everyone else into not doing anything rash, as long as the Eldar behave as well.

Judging from their allies matrix, it's fortunate that humans at least sometimes listen to them (so far as humans listen to any Eldar, anyway), since on the Tau worlds they visit they are inevitably met with an endless earful about the fucking Greater Good. They don't play on Necron [[Tomb World|Tomb Worlds]] (no shit?) given that the Necrons are the oldest foes of the Eldar and the two have brought each other nothing but grief over the last few billion years, and Harlequins work to fight against them just as hard as they do against Chaos. Don't even fucking ask if they play on Ork worlds (you know, they probably do, but have to reduce the dialogue to indecipherable grunting, swearing and cockney slang). It's presumed that they did try to play for the [[Tyranid]]s only once, but found out the space bug-lizards have no appreciation for art; hence the decision to put the Tyranids right next to Chaos and the Necrons on the mandate to kill-on-sight-and-annoy-the-hell-out-of.

During [[The War of The Beast]], [[Eldrad|Eldrad Ulthran]] sent a troupe of Harlequins to convey a message to the [[God-Emperor of Mankind]], letting Him know that Chaos had to be treated as the primary threat and that the [[Imperial Fists]] successor chapters were on their way. Quite why he thought that anyone would care about the first half of the message whilst the Imperium was literally facing total annihilation at the hands of The Beast no one but Eldrad knows. In another fantastic demonstration of Eldar logic, the Harlequins he sent thought that the best way to pass the message along was to butcher 99% of the Humans they came across whilst shouting "Friendship! Friendship!" Understandably they didn't find willing ears whilst they were eviscerating [[Imperial Guard|Guardsmen]] and [[Adeptus Custodes|Custodians]]. In fairness the humans likely wouldn't have listened anyway but the Eldar plan was definitely the worst one they could have possibly went with considering all that it got them was meeting their end before the Eternity gate. Props for getting that far though. All of them wound up getting [[RIP AND TEAR|massacred]] eventually by the Custodes (not without getting some for themselves), save for [[Lhaeriel Ray]], who was about to be slain by the Captain General save for the intervention of Grandmaster of Assassins [[Drakan Vangorich]] and Inquisitor [[Veritus]]. She was then brought to the ultra-secure Inquisition stronghold under the South Pole, to be interrogated and incarcerated for life. There she displayed a token from [[Vulkan]], who had apparently given it to [[Eldrad]] to indicate "friendship" in some future crisis, and continued to reiterate that she came in peace and to send a message to the Emperor, who she said once counted [[Eldrad|the dick]] as a friend. Eventually, though, Inquisitor [[Marguerethe Wienand|Weinand]] helped her escape to a shuttle where she went off to parts unknown, presumably carrying news of the whole affair and the situation on Terra back to [[Ulthwe]].

==The Final Act, A.K.A. The Last Troll==
In recent years, the Harlequins' war against Chaos has been characterised by a newfound urgency. Full masques have become an ever more common sight among the stars. Appearing from the Webway, they can be found performing within the realms of their kin or battling the galaxy's disparate races in vicious campaigns of apparently random violence. As the 41st Millennium comes to a close, more and more Eldar vanish into the Webway, forsaking their former lives to take up the Harlequin's mask. The Harlequins' numbers are growing, and many among the Eldar wonder why. The truth is inspirational and terrifying in equal measure. At the very heart of the Black Library there lies a silver-lit vault. Therein stands a plinth made of finely graven obstinite, upon which rests a crystalline book said to contain the words of Cegorach himself. Since the Fall, the tome’s covers have remained closed, sealed shut with flickering chains of light. Yet now, long-awaited portents have come to pass. A [[Ahriman|fallen sorcerer]] seeks the lore of the library. A [[Silent King|king]] stirs in his court of death and silence, preparing to rise once more. Within [[Eye of Terror|madness' eye]], the [[Abbadon the Despoiler|champion]] of the [[Ruinous Powers]] prepares to seize [[Cadia|a realm long denied]]. As the signs have come to pass, so the bands of light about the tome have flickered and died.

Now, at last, the tome has fallen open. Within its pages the Shadowseers have found a script, a secret final act that changes utterly the tale of the Fall. Penned in inks of light and shadow, these words present a slender hope, detailing an intricate, galaxy-spanning performance with the potential to change the fate of the Eldar race. Always, the strands of fate have pointed toward the victory of Chaos during the last, mythic battle known to the Eldar as the Rhana Dandra. Yet within the pages of the crystal tome is recorded Cegorach's ultimate and final [[Troll|jest,]] a way to trick Slaanesh into [[Lulz|expending all her power not to destroy the Eldar, but to save them.]] How such an impossibility could come to pass is unclear, for on this matter the final act is infuriatingly vague. Yet the Harlequins take their god's words on faith alone, for their devotion to Cegorach is total and his methods beyond question or reproach. Thus they have begun the steps of this final dance, and will see it completed, or else face absolute destruction in the attempt.

This is now also likely the Eldar species’ final and only hope for survival, period, since Eldrad upgraded from dick to dumb dick and went and boned everything for them, failing in an attempt to awaken [[Ynnead]] early and ended up killing him, all the progress that had gone into him, and the infinity circuits of every craftworld, instead. ''Whoops''. Course, this is probably precisely why the crystalline book opened in the first place, with Cegorach basically going “Oh dear, who could’ve seen that coming? Oh wait, I did, that’s why I have a plan B ready to go for you dumb shmucks. Let’s open it up shall we? And we’re keeping the [[Eldrad|Dick]] out of this one. That fuckup with Ynnead…even I think that wasn't funny.” 

Until Eldrad didn't, of course. Ynnead seems to be doing just fine, if forming the Yncarne is any indication. Though the Harlequins are still working with them so maybe the plan to trick Slaanesh is still on. Or the Harlequins figure they might as well hedge their bets. If one plan fails, the other might succeed. Or it was the plan all along. In any case, they, like everyone else who understands the scale of the Imperium, may be dicks but aren't stupid enough to truly bring mankind's wrath down on them. Especially since the Inquisition has Inquisitors who know the location of the Black Library...In any case, they're more or less co-operating with the Ynnari though how much of this is honest and how much of it is just coincidence and how much of it is going to end up with the Craftworld Eldar getting a hilarious dose of their own backstabbing medicine is yet to be revealed. Assuming this plot thread isn't just dropped or ignored by GW, of course.

== Masques ==
7th Edition introduced numerous subfactions of the Harlequins known as Masques. Masques are pretty small compared to most Warhammer subfactions, only consisting of about three squads or Troupes, each lead by a Troupe Master, plus support in the form of vehicles and specialist performers like Death Jesters and Shadowseers. To get an idea for the scale, the novella "The Masque of Vyle" stated that a Masque consisting of two dozen Harlequins was unusually large. The 8th Edition codex retconned this a little by saying that the named Masques were actually "Grand Masques" that contained multiple Masques within them, with each Masque acting as its own autonomous unit and the Midnight Sorrow being said to consist of "many dozens of Masques". Below is a list of the most well-known Masques.

*The Midnight Sorrow: The blue and red ones you see on the box covers. Are the most dedicated to fighting Chaos, and embrace their roles to the point where they lose all trace of their original identities. All their performances are about the dangers of Chaos to the point where the only acts they put on anymore are depictions of the Fall. Helped Eldrad with his ritual to summon Ynnead, and thus became the first Harlequins to support the Ynnari.
*The Veiled Path: Manipulative bastards, with a history of betrayal so great even other Harlequins don't trust them. Their most famous member is Sylandri Veilwalker, AKA clown Eldrad, whose schemes have manipulated figures ranging from [[Fabius Bile]] to [[Belisarius Cawl]]. Helped the Ynnari, but also helped Vect who views them as his greatest enemy so who the fuck knows what they're planning.
*The Frozen Stars: [[Noblebright|Strongly believes that the Eldar race can be saved and their empire rebuilt]]. [[Grimdark|Also believes all non-Eldar races are vermin who should be killed for the Laughing God's amusement]].
*The Dreaming Shadow: Dedicated not to fighting Chaos but the [[Necrons]]. They are known to resent other Harlequins over their disagreement on who the true enemy is, but this sentiment is deliberately exaggerated. Most Harlequins see through this act and hold the Dreaming Shadow in high esteem regardless.
*The Soaring Spite: Dedicated to telling the tales of Cegorach's close ally known as the Cosmic Serpent. As such, are known for using a wide array of jetbikes and skimmers, Harlequin vehicles being named after the Cosmic Serpent's spawn. Are very close to the Craftworld [[Saim-Hann]], supposedly because Saim-Hann's symbol is the Cosmic Serpent but really because both like to go fast.
*The Silent Shroud: A incredibly secretive masque that performs in complete silence. Not only do they not say a word, their weapons are muffled by technology and illusion, making battle against them disorientating and unnerving. As such, they specialize in stealth and terror tactics, like the Night Lords except specializing in the "bad LSD trip" form of horror instead of jumpscares and torture porn.
*The Dance Without End: This Masque specializes in performances that recount the deeds of Cegorach himself, and as such are believed to be the closest to the Laughing God of all his disciples. They were the first Masque to perform the dance representing the Fall of the Eldar. After all of this, they are also ''the'' Masque defending the webway and the Black Library more than any other, and if they dont know a path in the webway, no one does. Despite how this lore makes them sound really fucking important, don't have rules in 8th edition.
*The Shattered Mirage: Compared to The Frozen Stars, The Shattered Mirage believe the Eldar are totally fucked, performing dances that are extremely dark and fatalistic. Thanks to their outlook on life, their preferred tactics are to do as much damage as possible, with little regard for their own lives.
*The Twisted Path: These guys are known for letting their audience members into their plays, only to be spirited away by the Harlequins and never seen again. In battle, they often kidnap both enemies and allies as well as strike in the middle of warzones, sometimes leaving right before victory. They explain their actions with complex riddles and illogical analogies.
*The Reaper's Mirth: The most bloodthirsty of Masques, the Harlequins of The Reaper's Mirth see the battlefield as a canvas for their gory arts. Because of this, they have a larger proportion of Death Jester's among their ranks. They are known for committing atrocities like the [[Grimdark|Fountain of Crimson Tears, which was so horrible that an entire world had to be exterminatused.]] We can only guess what it was. Given stuff like that, it's doubtful the Craftworld or Exodite Eldar want anything to do with them. I mean, ''fuck'' that's Khornate if ever there was any.

== The Players ==
Each Harlequin Masques is made up of a cast of players, that perform the many complex and intricate dances that retell the history, and the many myths of the Eldar species, each performances is led by a troupe master. These Harlequins make up the bulk of each Masque, supported by the Skyweavers, Voidweavers and Starweavers they make up the supporting cast, that without which, no performance could happen.

Shadowseers and Death Jesters take up prominent positions within each Masque but they still take up the role of secondary characters behind the Star Performers, who play the roles of the most important characters in Eldar History. At most the Shadowseer will represent or personify fate while the Death Jester does the same for death. Each of the Eldar Pantheon has a dedicated Eldar taking up their place within the performance, though only two have been revealed so far:

* The [[Solitaire]] - who takes up the role of [[Slaanesh]]. Literally anyone else who attempts the role will go insane, and Solitaires typically do not stay with a particular troop permanently.
* The so called Harlequin King- Who take up the role of [[Cegorach]], the Laughing God itself; who even [[Lelith Hesperax]] doubts she could best. In lieu of the Harlequin King, a Troupe Master represents the Laughing God.
* Although not named, a new player has entered into the performance- who takes up the role of [[Ynnead]].

If GW ever wanted to expand the range on the table top, they could easily turn the Harlequins into a small elite army of powerful Characters, supported by the weaker regular players; who doesn't want too see the Harlequin version of Khaine or Isha?

== We're Our Own Army Now ==

7th edition saw Harlequins get to be their own Faction, with new models for all members of the troupe, plus new models and rules for the Solitaire and a new Eldar jetbike, the Skyweaver. There are also two new vehicles, the Starweaver (a transport) and the Voidweaver. In addition, Shadowseers got their own Psychic Discipline, Phantasmancy. Harlequins survived into 8th and became all sorts of more killy and speedy, and get to freely mingle with their Dark and Craftworld cousins thanks to sharing the Aeldari keyword. Let the show go on!

Now with our own [[Harlequin Masque Creation Tables|faction creation tables.]]

== See Also ==

*[[Harlequin Masque Creation Tables]]
*[[Warhammer 40,000/Tactics/Eldar Harlequins (9E)|Tactics on how to play them.]]

[[Category: Warhammer 40,000]]

[[Category: Xenos]]

[[Category: Eldar]]

[[Category: Harlequins]]

{{Harlequin}}

{{Eldar-Forces}}

{{WH40k-Factions}}

Harlequin

2021-01-31T04:38:05Z

2406:3400:20F:FFC0:91A4:8232:D3C0:65CB: /* The Final Act, A.K.A. The Last Troll */

[[File:Eldar Harlequin.jpg|thumb|Break a leg? Why limit myself?]]

{{Topquote|I used to think that my life was a tragedy, but now I realize, it’s a fucking comedy.|Arthur Fleck - Joker (2019)}}

The '''Harlequins''' are galactic clowns. Or more accurately, galactic thespians. Or even more accurately, galactic Juggalos. They are the [[Eldar]] followers of [[Cegorach]], the Laughing God. They are the performers and entertainers of the Eldar, the self-appointed protectors of the Eldar's pre-[[Fall of the Eldar|Fall]] history, which they perform in extremely elaborate plays involving not only elaborate costumes, scenery, acrobatics, and a troupe of dedicated actors, but further elaboration of the drama through [[Psyker|psykana]] and [[Drugs|psychedelic drugs]] which are disseminated throughout the audience that they too may see into clown world. The end result is something like a deranged mixture of a bardic recitation of oral history, a circus, grimdark edgy performance art, elaborate spiritual exercise, and a Grateful Dead concert, dedicated to reenacting and expressing the story of the fall of the Eldar, as both elegy and warning.

Far from being merely performers, though, and despite their rather ludicrous appearance, they are in fact some of the most dangerous shock-troopers among the Eldar, taking the concept of "break a leg" as far as you would expect in [[Warhammer 40,000]]. As self-appointed keepers of history, in addition to reciting and propagating it through performance art, they also maintain and guard the collection of esoteric knowledge deep in the Webway in the hidden [[Black Library]], protecting it from [[Ahzek Ahriman|those who would attempt]] to enter and learn of forbidden lore which they might use for evil and the furtherance of goals of [[Chaos]]. The Harlequins' protection of the Library is almost impenetrable, but they will from time to time allow those who have conquered the [[Chaos]] within them to enter. They have allowed Eldar, other xenos, and [[Just As Planned|even humans]] into the Library at times when their agenda is to fight against Chaos, but they will fight to the death to prevent the Chaotically aligned, or those vulnerable to corruption by Chaos, to enter.

In times of war, the Harlequins fight the foes they see as posing a threat to the very existence of the Eldar, first and foremost [[Chaos Space Marines]], the [[Necron]]s, and the [[Tyranids]]. The [[Imperium|Imperials]] and [[Tau]] can be worked with, and the [[Orks]] are easily manipulated; unlike most Eldar, the Harlequins are free of racial prejudice, so as long as you battle the threats to all things and aren't attacking them or getting in their way, they're perfectly happy to work with you be you Mon'Keigh or Blueberry. This makes them one of the most [[Reasonable Marines|level-minded]] factions in the setting and helps make them a very likeable faction, in contrast to the Craftworlders and Dark Eldar who are hated for being status quo-defending fairies and for being psychotic [[sick fuck]]s.

==The glue that keeps the Eldar together==
They owe no allegiance to any [[Craftworld]], Corsair Fleet, [[Exodite World]], or [[Dark Eldar]] [[Kabal]], but rather recruit members from all factions, and will fight in their armies on all sides. Their only loyalty is to [[Cegorach]], whom they believe has charged them with the "Great Work" of reunifying the Craftworld Eldar, Corsairs, Dark Eldar, and [[Exodite]] Eldar into a single race to fight off [[Slaanesh]], the Necrons, and whoever else has a bone to pick with the chosen people of the [[Old Ones]]. It is notable that they do not use the methods to keep their souls safe that other Eldar do—their faith in Cegorach, complete after going through the Trial to become a Harlequin, is enough to keep them safe. Despite this, they are allowed free passage through the Craftworlds and [[Commorragh]], because the Craftworld and Exodite Eldar respect the Harlequins for preserving their history, and the Dark Eldar and Corsairs <s>are ''too afraid'' to try and stop them</s> find Death Jesters' humor hilarious; they also couldn't keep the Harlequins out if they tried due to the Harlequins' superior knowledge of, and ability to use, the [[Webway]].

This also makes the Harlequins the closest thing to a central authority the Eldar species has. While the various Eldar factions may not necessarily answer to the clowns, when they speak, everyone from Commorragh pimps and Craftworld wizards to Exodite farmers and Corsair pirates stops what they're doing and '''listens'''. Even [[Asdrubael Vect]] has to make sure and pin it on someone else whenever he gets up to skullduggery that might piss them off.

== Eldar Ambassadors? ==
[[Image:Harlequin.jpg|They actually are this hot in the setting, but most people are too busy screaming in pain or fear to comment on it.|thumb|right]]
Harlequins do not necessarily restrict their visits to the Eldar. In the Harlequins' view, they must perform their work for anyone and everyone who may benefit and learn the lessons from The Fall. Thus it is very rare, but not unknown, for Harlequin troupes to visit Imperial worlds. However, it must be noted that given the Imperium's strict policy of xenophobia, the circumstances under which such visits occur almost always coincide with the absence of strict Imperial oversight.

Of course, given the inscrutable nature of Eldar language and art, it is highly debatable whether or not a human audience would even be able to grasp the message that a Harlequin performance was attempting to convey. Most accounts of Harlequin performances amount to something like splatterhouse Shakespeare, with chainsword wielding [[Coenobite]] clowns flinging psychedelic rainbow viscera while the audience trips out on peyote. On the other hand, it is conceivable that Harlequins adjust their performance based on the audience, keeping the performance elaborate in form, but simple in message, thus allowing humans to understand the Great Enemy and what can be done.

In any event, by the time Imperial authorities become fully aware of the presence of a Harlequin troupe, the xenos have inevitably departed. Given the isolated nature of many imperial worlds and the Imperial policy of enforced ignorance, most common inhabitants might find the harlequins as just another passing troupe of strange, incredibly skilled artists, unaware for the most part of their xenos nature. Furthermore, since harlequins only need a webway portal instead of say, a massive starship to get onto a world, no one really discovers they have been in a close encounter of the third kind, at least until some Ordo Xenos operative takes notice. Thus, while in theory Harlequins (as xenos) are not welcome on Imperial worlds, in practice the Imperium can generally do little to stop such visitations.

Another explanation is that while the Ordo Xenos may not be fans, the Ordo Malleus is fully aware that the Eldar know more about Chaos than they do, and that the Harlequins fight Chaos as agents of the Black Library. The Inquisition's desire to obtain that knowledge is therefore probably enough to make them pressure everyone else into not doing anything rash, as long as the Eldar behave as well.

Judging from their allies matrix, it's fortunate that humans at least sometimes listen to them (so far as humans listen to any Eldar, anyway), since on the Tau worlds they visit they are inevitably met with an endless earful about the fucking Greater Good. They don't play on Necron [[Tomb World|Tomb Worlds]] (no shit?) given that the Necrons are the oldest foes of the Eldar and the two have brought each other nothing but grief over the last few billion years, and Harlequins work to fight against them just as hard as they do against Chaos. Don't even fucking ask if they play on Ork worlds (you know, they probably do, but have to reduce the dialogue to indecipherable grunting, swearing and cockney slang). It's presumed that they did try to play for the [[Tyranid]]s only once, but found out the space bug-lizards have no appreciation for art; hence the decision to put the Tyranids right next to Chaos and the Necrons on the mandate to kill-on-sight-and-annoy-the-hell-out-of.

During [[The War of The Beast]], [[Eldrad|Eldrad Ulthran]] sent a troupe of Harlequins to convey a message to the [[God-Emperor of Mankind]], letting Him know that Chaos had to be treated as the primary threat and that the [[Imperial Fists]] successor chapters were on their way. Quite why he thought that anyone would care about the first half of the message whilst the Imperium was literally facing total annihilation at the hands of The Beast no one but Eldrad knows. In another fantastic demonstration of Eldar logic, the Harlequins he sent thought that the best way to pass the message along was to butcher 99% of the Humans they came across whilst shouting "Friendship! Friendship!" Understandably they didn't find willing ears whilst they were eviscerating [[Imperial Guard|Guardsmen]] and [[Adeptus Custodes|Custodians]]. In fairness the humans likely wouldn't have listened anyway but the Eldar plan was definitely the worst one they could have possibly went with considering all that it got them was meeting their end before the Eternity gate. Props for getting that far though. All of them wound up getting [[RIP AND TEAR|massacred]] eventually by the Custodes (not without getting some for themselves), save for [[Lhaeriel Ray]], who was about to be slain by the Captain General save for the intervention of Grandmaster of Assassins [[Drakan Vangorich]] and Inquisitor [[Veritus]]. She was then brought to the ultra-secure Inquisition stronghold under the South Pole, to be interrogated and incarcerated for life. There she displayed a token from [[Vulkan]], who had apparently given it to [[Eldrad]] to indicate "friendship" in some future crisis, and continued to reiterate that she came in peace and to send a message to the Emperor, who she said once counted [[Eldrad|the dick]] as a friend. Eventually, though, Inquisitor [[Marguerethe Wienand|Weinand]] helped her escape to a shuttle where she went off to parts unknown, presumably carrying news of the whole affair and the situation on Terra back to [[Ulthwe]].

==The Final Act, A.K.A. The Last Troll==
In recent years, the Harlequins' war against Chaos has been characterised by a newfound urgency. Full masques have become an ever more common sight among the stars. Appearing from the Webway, they can be found performing within the realms of their kin or battling the galaxy's disparate races in vicious campaigns of apparently random violence. As the 41st Millennium comes to a close, more and more Eldar vanish into the Webway, forsaking their former lives to take up the Harlequin's mask. The Harlequins' numbers are growing, and many among the Eldar wonder why. The truth is inspirational and terrifying in equal measure. At the very heart of the Black Library there lies a silver-lit vault. Therein stands a plinth made of finely graven obstinite, upon which rests a crystalline book said to contain the words of Cegorach himself. Since the Fall, the tome’s covers have remained closed, sealed shut with flickering chains of light. Yet now, long-awaited portents have come to pass. A [[Ahriman|fallen sorcerer]] seeks the lore of the library. A [[Silent King|king]] stirs in his court of death and silence, preparing to rise once more. Within [[Eye of Terror|madness' eye]], the [[Abbadon the Despoiler|champion]] of the [[Ruinous Powers]] prepares to seize [[Cadia|a realm long denied]]. As the signs have come to pass, so the bands of light about the tome have flickered and died.

Now, at last, the tome has fallen open. Within its pages the Shadowseers have found a script, a secret final act that changes utterly the tale of the Fall. Penned in inks of light and shadow, these words present a slender hope, detailing an intricate, galaxy-spanning performance with the potential to change the fate of the Eldar race. Always, the strands of fate have pointed toward the victory of Chaos during the last, mythic battle known to the Eldar as the Rhana Dandra. Yet within the pages of the crystal tome is recorded Cegorach's ultimate and final [[Troll|jest,]] a way to trick Slaanesh into [[Lulz|expending all her power not to destroy the Eldar, but to save them.]] How such an impossibility could come to pass is unclear, for on this matter the final act is infuriatingly vague. Yet the Harlequins take their god's words on faith alone, for their devotion to Cegorach is total and his methods beyond question or reproach. Thus they have begun the steps of this final dance, and will see it completed, or else face absolute destruction in the attempt.

This is now also likely the Eldar species’ final and only hope for survival, period, since Eldrad upgraded from dick to dumb dick and went and boned everything for them, failing in an attempt to awaken [[Ynnead]] early and ended up killing him, all the progress that had gone into him, and the infinity circuits of every craftworld, instead. ''Whoops''. Course, this is probably precisely why the crystalline book opened in the first place, with Cegorach basically going “Oh dear, who could’ve seen that coming? Oh wait, I did, that’s why I have a plan B ready to go for you dumb shmucks. Let’s open it up shall we? And we’re keeping the [[Eldrad|Dick]] out of this one. That fuckup with Ynnead…even I have to say that wasn't funny.” 

Until Eldrad didn't, of course. Ynnead seems to be doing just fine, if forming the Yncarne is any indication. Though the Harlequins are still working with them so maybe the plan to trick Slaanesh is still on. Or the Harlequins figure they might as well hedge their bets. If one plan fails, the other might succeed. Or it was the plan all along. In any case, they, like everyone else who understands the scale of the Imperium, may be dicks but aren't stupid enough to truly bring mankind's wrath down on them. Especially since the Inquisition has Inquisitors who know the location of the Black Library...In any case, they're more or less co-operating with the Ynnari though how much of this is honest and how much of it is just coincidence and how much of it is going to end up with the Craftworld Eldar getting a hilarious dose of their own backstabbing medicine is yet to be revealed. Assuming this plot thread isn't just dropped or ignored by GW, of course.

== Masques ==
7th Edition introduced numerous subfactions of the Harlequins known as Masques. Masques are pretty small compared to most Warhammer subfactions, only consisting of about three squads or Troupes, each lead by a Troupe Master, plus support in the form of vehicles and specialist performers like Death Jesters and Shadowseers. To get an idea for the scale, the novella "The Masque of Vyle" stated that a Masque consisting of two dozen Harlequins was unusually large. The 8th Edition codex retconned this a little by saying that the named Masques were actually "Grand Masques" that contained multiple Masques within them, with each Masque acting as its own autonomous unit and the Midnight Sorrow being said to consist of "many dozens of Masques". Below is a list of the most well-known Masques.

*The Midnight Sorrow: The blue and red ones you see on the box covers. Are the most dedicated to fighting Chaos, and embrace their roles to the point where they lose all trace of their original identities. All their performances are about the dangers of Chaos to the point where the only acts they put on anymore are depictions of the Fall. Helped Eldrad with his ritual to summon Ynnead, and thus became the first Harlequins to support the Ynnari.
*The Veiled Path: Manipulative bastards, with a history of betrayal so great even other Harlequins don't trust them. Their most famous member is Sylandri Veilwalker, AKA clown Eldrad, whose schemes have manipulated figures ranging from [[Fabius Bile]] to [[Belisarius Cawl]]. Helped the Ynnari, but also helped Vect who views them as his greatest enemy so who the fuck knows what they're planning.
*The Frozen Stars: [[Noblebright|Strongly believes that the Eldar race can be saved and their empire rebuilt]]. [[Grimdark|Also believes all non-Eldar races are vermin who should be killed for the Laughing God's amusement]].
*The Dreaming Shadow: Dedicated not to fighting Chaos but the [[Necrons]]. They are known to resent other Harlequins over their disagreement on who the true enemy is, but this sentiment is deliberately exaggerated. Most Harlequins see through this act and hold the Dreaming Shadow in high esteem regardless.
*The Soaring Spite: Dedicated to telling the tales of Cegorach's close ally known as the Cosmic Serpent. As such, are known for using a wide array of jetbikes and skimmers, Harlequin vehicles being named after the Cosmic Serpent's spawn. Are very close to the Craftworld [[Saim-Hann]], supposedly because Saim-Hann's symbol is the Cosmic Serpent but really because both like to go fast.
*The Silent Shroud: A incredibly secretive masque that performs in complete silence. Not only do they not say a word, their weapons are muffled by technology and illusion, making battle against them disorientating and unnerving. As such, they specialize in stealth and terror tactics, like the Night Lords except specializing in the "bad LSD trip" form of horror instead of jumpscares and torture porn.
*The Dance Without End: This Masque specializes in performances that recount the deeds of Cegorach himself, and as such are believed to be the closest to the Laughing God of all his disciples. They were the first Masque to perform the dance representing the Fall of the Eldar. After all of this, they are also ''the'' Masque defending the webway and the Black Library more than any other, and if they dont know a path in the webway, no one does. Despite how this lore makes them sound really fucking important, don't have rules in 8th edition.
*The Shattered Mirage: Compared to The Frozen Stars, The Shattered Mirage believe the Eldar are totally fucked, performing dances that are extremely dark and fatalistic. Thanks to their outlook on life, their preferred tactics are to do as much damage as possible, with little regard for their own lives.
*The Twisted Path: These guys are known for letting their audience members into their plays, only to be spirited away by the Harlequins and never seen again. In battle, they often kidnap both enemies and allies as well as strike in the middle of warzones, sometimes leaving right before victory. They explain their actions with complex riddles and illogical analogies.
*The Reaper's Mirth: The most bloodthirsty of Masques, the Harlequins of The Reaper's Mirth see the battlefield as a canvas for their gory arts. Because of this, they have a larger proportion of Death Jester's among their ranks. They are known for committing atrocities like the [[Grimdark|Fountain of Crimson Tears, which was so horrible that an entire world had to be exterminatused.]] We can only guess what it was. Given stuff like that, it's doubtful the Craftworld or Exodite Eldar want anything to do with them. I mean, ''fuck'' that's Khornate if ever there was any.

== The Players ==
Each Harlequin Masques is made up of a cast of players, that perform the many complex and intricate dances that retell the history, and the many myths of the Eldar species, each performances is led by a troupe master. These Harlequins make up the bulk of each Masque, supported by the Skyweavers, Voidweavers and Starweavers they make up the supporting cast, that without which, no performance could happen.

Shadowseers and Death Jesters take up prominent positions within each Masque but they still take up the role of secondary characters behind the Star Performers, who play the roles of the most important characters in Eldar History. At most the Shadowseer will represent or personify fate while the Death Jester does the same for death. Each of the Eldar Pantheon has a dedicated Eldar taking up their place within the performance, though only two have been revealed so far:

* The [[Solitaire]] - who takes up the role of [[Slaanesh]]. Literally anyone else who attempts the role will go insane, and Solitaires typically do not stay with a particular troop permanently.
* The so called Harlequin King- Who take up the role of [[Cegorach]], the Laughing God itself; who even [[Lelith Hesperax]] doubts she could best. In lieu of the Harlequin King, a Troupe Master represents the Laughing God.
* Although not named, a new player has entered into the performance- who takes up the role of [[Ynnead]].

If GW ever wanted to expand the range on the table top, they could easily turn the Harlequins into a small elite army of powerful Characters, supported by the weaker regular players; who doesn't want too see the Harlequin version of Khaine or Isha?

== We're Our Own Army Now ==

7th edition saw Harlequins get to be their own Faction, with new models for all members of the troupe, plus new models and rules for the Solitaire and a new Eldar jetbike, the Skyweaver. There are also two new vehicles, the Starweaver (a transport) and the Voidweaver. In addition, Shadowseers got their own Psychic Discipline, Phantasmancy. Harlequins survived into 8th and became all sorts of more killy and speedy, and get to freely mingle with their Dark and Craftworld cousins thanks to sharing the Aeldari keyword. Let the show go on!

Now with our own [[Harlequin Masque Creation Tables|faction creation tables.]]

== See Also ==

*[[Harlequin Masque Creation Tables]]
*[[Warhammer 40,000/Tactics/Eldar Harlequins (9E)|Tactics on how to play them.]]

[[Category: Warhammer 40,000]]

[[Category: Xenos]]

[[Category: Eldar]]

[[Category: Harlequins]]

{{Harlequin}}

{{Eldar-Forces}}

{{WH40k-Factions}}

Harlequin

2021-01-31T04:37:42Z

2406:3400:20F:FFC0:91A4:8232:D3C0:65CB: /* The Final Act, A.K.A. The Last Troll */

[[File:Eldar Harlequin.jpg|thumb|Break a leg? Why limit myself?]]

{{Topquote|I used to think that my life was a tragedy, but now I realize, it’s a fucking comedy.|Arthur Fleck - Joker (2019)}}

The '''Harlequins''' are galactic clowns. Or more accurately, galactic thespians. Or even more accurately, galactic Juggalos. They are the [[Eldar]] followers of [[Cegorach]], the Laughing God. They are the performers and entertainers of the Eldar, the self-appointed protectors of the Eldar's pre-[[Fall of the Eldar|Fall]] history, which they perform in extremely elaborate plays involving not only elaborate costumes, scenery, acrobatics, and a troupe of dedicated actors, but further elaboration of the drama through [[Psyker|psykana]] and [[Drugs|psychedelic drugs]] which are disseminated throughout the audience that they too may see into clown world. The end result is something like a deranged mixture of a bardic recitation of oral history, a circus, grimdark edgy performance art, elaborate spiritual exercise, and a Grateful Dead concert, dedicated to reenacting and expressing the story of the fall of the Eldar, as both elegy and warning.

Far from being merely performers, though, and despite their rather ludicrous appearance, they are in fact some of the most dangerous shock-troopers among the Eldar, taking the concept of "break a leg" as far as you would expect in [[Warhammer 40,000]]. As self-appointed keepers of history, in addition to reciting and propagating it through performance art, they also maintain and guard the collection of esoteric knowledge deep in the Webway in the hidden [[Black Library]], protecting it from [[Ahzek Ahriman|those who would attempt]] to enter and learn of forbidden lore which they might use for evil and the furtherance of goals of [[Chaos]]. The Harlequins' protection of the Library is almost impenetrable, but they will from time to time allow those who have conquered the [[Chaos]] within them to enter. They have allowed Eldar, other xenos, and [[Just As Planned|even humans]] into the Library at times when their agenda is to fight against Chaos, but they will fight to the death to prevent the Chaotically aligned, or those vulnerable to corruption by Chaos, to enter.

In times of war, the Harlequins fight the foes they see as posing a threat to the very existence of the Eldar, first and foremost [[Chaos Space Marines]], the [[Necron]]s, and the [[Tyranids]]. The [[Imperium|Imperials]] and [[Tau]] can be worked with, and the [[Orks]] are easily manipulated; unlike most Eldar, the Harlequins are free of racial prejudice, so as long as you battle the threats to all things and aren't attacking them or getting in their way, they're perfectly happy to work with you be you Mon'Keigh or Blueberry. This makes them one of the most [[Reasonable Marines|level-minded]] factions in the setting and helps make them a very likeable faction, in contrast to the Craftworlders and Dark Eldar who are hated for being status quo-defending fairies and for being psychotic [[sick fuck]]s.

==The glue that keeps the Eldar together==
They owe no allegiance to any [[Craftworld]], Corsair Fleet, [[Exodite World]], or [[Dark Eldar]] [[Kabal]], but rather recruit members from all factions, and will fight in their armies on all sides. Their only loyalty is to [[Cegorach]], whom they believe has charged them with the "Great Work" of reunifying the Craftworld Eldar, Corsairs, Dark Eldar, and [[Exodite]] Eldar into a single race to fight off [[Slaanesh]], the Necrons, and whoever else has a bone to pick with the chosen people of the [[Old Ones]]. It is notable that they do not use the methods to keep their souls safe that other Eldar do—their faith in Cegorach, complete after going through the Trial to become a Harlequin, is enough to keep them safe. Despite this, they are allowed free passage through the Craftworlds and [[Commorragh]], because the Craftworld and Exodite Eldar respect the Harlequins for preserving their history, and the Dark Eldar and Corsairs <s>are ''too afraid'' to try and stop them</s> find Death Jesters' humor hilarious; they also couldn't keep the Harlequins out if they tried due to the Harlequins' superior knowledge of, and ability to use, the [[Webway]].

This also makes the Harlequins the closest thing to a central authority the Eldar species has. While the various Eldar factions may not necessarily answer to the clowns, when they speak, everyone from Commorragh pimps and Craftworld wizards to Exodite farmers and Corsair pirates stops what they're doing and '''listens'''. Even [[Asdrubael Vect]] has to make sure and pin it on someone else whenever he gets up to skullduggery that might piss them off.

== Eldar Ambassadors? ==
[[Image:Harlequin.jpg|They actually are this hot in the setting, but most people are too busy screaming in pain or fear to comment on it.|thumb|right]]
Harlequins do not necessarily restrict their visits to the Eldar. In the Harlequins' view, they must perform their work for anyone and everyone who may benefit and learn the lessons from The Fall. Thus it is very rare, but not unknown, for Harlequin troupes to visit Imperial worlds. However, it must be noted that given the Imperium's strict policy of xenophobia, the circumstances under which such visits occur almost always coincide with the absence of strict Imperial oversight.

Of course, given the inscrutable nature of Eldar language and art, it is highly debatable whether or not a human audience would even be able to grasp the message that a Harlequin performance was attempting to convey. Most accounts of Harlequin performances amount to something like splatterhouse Shakespeare, with chainsword wielding [[Coenobite]] clowns flinging psychedelic rainbow viscera while the audience trips out on peyote. On the other hand, it is conceivable that Harlequins adjust their performance based on the audience, keeping the performance elaborate in form, but simple in message, thus allowing humans to understand the Great Enemy and what can be done.

In any event, by the time Imperial authorities become fully aware of the presence of a Harlequin troupe, the xenos have inevitably departed. Given the isolated nature of many imperial worlds and the Imperial policy of enforced ignorance, most common inhabitants might find the harlequins as just another passing troupe of strange, incredibly skilled artists, unaware for the most part of their xenos nature. Furthermore, since harlequins only need a webway portal instead of say, a massive starship to get onto a world, no one really discovers they have been in a close encounter of the third kind, at least until some Ordo Xenos operative takes notice. Thus, while in theory Harlequins (as xenos) are not welcome on Imperial worlds, in practice the Imperium can generally do little to stop such visitations.

Another explanation is that while the Ordo Xenos may not be fans, the Ordo Malleus is fully aware that the Eldar know more about Chaos than they do, and that the Harlequins fight Chaos as agents of the Black Library. The Inquisition's desire to obtain that knowledge is therefore probably enough to make them pressure everyone else into not doing anything rash, as long as the Eldar behave as well.

Judging from their allies matrix, it's fortunate that humans at least sometimes listen to them (so far as humans listen to any Eldar, anyway), since on the Tau worlds they visit they are inevitably met with an endless earful about the fucking Greater Good. They don't play on Necron [[Tomb World|Tomb Worlds]] (no shit?) given that the Necrons are the oldest foes of the Eldar and the two have brought each other nothing but grief over the last few billion years, and Harlequins work to fight against them just as hard as they do against Chaos. Don't even fucking ask if they play on Ork worlds (you know, they probably do, but have to reduce the dialogue to indecipherable grunting, swearing and cockney slang). It's presumed that they did try to play for the [[Tyranid]]s only once, but found out the space bug-lizards have no appreciation for art; hence the decision to put the Tyranids right next to Chaos and the Necrons on the mandate to kill-on-sight-and-annoy-the-hell-out-of.

During [[The War of The Beast]], [[Eldrad|Eldrad Ulthran]] sent a troupe of Harlequins to convey a message to the [[God-Emperor of Mankind]], letting Him know that Chaos had to be treated as the primary threat and that the [[Imperial Fists]] successor chapters were on their way. Quite why he thought that anyone would care about the first half of the message whilst the Imperium was literally facing total annihilation at the hands of The Beast no one but Eldrad knows. In another fantastic demonstration of Eldar logic, the Harlequins he sent thought that the best way to pass the message along was to butcher 99% of the Humans they came across whilst shouting "Friendship! Friendship!" Understandably they didn't find willing ears whilst they were eviscerating [[Imperial Guard|Guardsmen]] and [[Adeptus Custodes|Custodians]]. In fairness the humans likely wouldn't have listened anyway but the Eldar plan was definitely the worst one they could have possibly went with considering all that it got them was meeting their end before the Eternity gate. Props for getting that far though. All of them wound up getting [[RIP AND TEAR|massacred]] eventually by the Custodes (not without getting some for themselves), save for [[Lhaeriel Ray]], who was about to be slain by the Captain General save for the intervention of Grandmaster of Assassins [[Drakan Vangorich]] and Inquisitor [[Veritus]]. She was then brought to the ultra-secure Inquisition stronghold under the South Pole, to be interrogated and incarcerated for life. There she displayed a token from [[Vulkan]], who had apparently given it to [[Eldrad]] to indicate "friendship" in some future crisis, and continued to reiterate that she came in peace and to send a message to the Emperor, who she said once counted [[Eldrad|the dick]] as a friend. Eventually, though, Inquisitor [[Marguerethe Wienand|Weinand]] helped her escape to a shuttle where she went off to parts unknown, presumably carrying news of the whole affair and the situation on Terra back to [[Ulthwe]].

==The Final Act, A.K.A. The Last Troll==
In recent years, the Harlequins' war against Chaos has been characterised by a newfound urgency. Full masques have become an ever more common sight among the stars. Appearing from the Webway, they can be found performing within the realms of their kin or battling the galaxy's disparate races in vicious campaigns of apparently random violence. As the 41st Millennium comes to a close, more and more Eldar vanish into the Webway, forsaking their former lives to take up the Harlequin's mask. The Harlequins' numbers are growing, and many among the Eldar wonder why. The truth is inspirational and terrifying in equal measure. At the very heart of the Black Library there lies a silver-lit vault. Therein stands a plinth made of finely graven obstinite, upon which rests a crystalline book said to contain the words of Cegorach himself. Since the Fall, the tome’s covers have remained closed, sealed shut with flickering chains of light. Yet now, long-awaited portents have come to pass. A [[Ahriman|fallen sorcerer]] seeks the lore of the library. A [[Silent King|king]] stirs in his court of death and silence, preparing to rise once more. Within [[Eye of Terror|madness' eye]], the [[Abbadon the Despoiler|champion]] of the [[Ruinous Powers]] prepares to seize [[Cadia|a realm long denied]]. As the signs have come to pass, so the bands of light about the tome have flickered and died.

Now, at last, the tome has fallen open. Within its pages the Shadowseers have found a script, a secret final act that changes utterly the tale of the Fall. Penned in inks of light and shadow, these words present a slender hope, detailing an intricate, galaxy-spanning performance with the potential to change the fate of the Eldar race. Always, the strands of fate have pointed toward the victory of Chaos during the last, mythic battle known to the Eldar as the Rhana Dandra. Yet within the pages of the crystal tome is recorded Cegorach's ultimate and final [[Troll|jest,]] a way to trick Slaanesh into [[Lulz|expending all her power not to destroy the Eldar, but to save them.]] How such an impossibility could come to pass is unclear, for on this matter the final act is infuriatingly vague. Yet the Harlequins take their god's words on faith alone, for their devotion to Cegorach is total and his methods beyond question or reproach. Thus they have begun the steps of this final dance, and will see it completed, or else face absolute destruction in the attempt.

This is now also likely the Eldar species’ final and only hope for survival, period, since Eldrad upgraded from dick to dumb dick and went and boned everything for them, failing in an attempt to awaken [[Ynnead]] early and ended up killing him, all the progress that had gone into him, and the infinity circuits of every craftworld, instead. ''Whoops''. Course, this is probably precisely why the crystalline book opened in the first place, with Cegorach basically going “Oh dear, who could’ve seen that coming? Oh wait, I did, that’s why I have a plan B ready to go for you dumb shmucks. Let’s open it up shall we? And we’re keeping the [[Eldrad|Dick]] out of this one. That fuckup with Ynnead…even I don't think wasn’t funny.” 

Until Eldrad didn't, of course. Ynnead seems to be doing just fine, if forming the Yncarne is any indication. Though the Harlequins are still working with them so maybe the plan to trick Slaanesh is still on. Or the Harlequins figure they might as well hedge their bets. If one plan fails, the other might succeed. Or it was the plan all along. In any case, they, like everyone else who understands the scale of the Imperium, may be dicks but aren't stupid enough to truly bring mankind's wrath down on them. Especially since the Inquisition has Inquisitors who know the location of the Black Library...In any case, they're more or less co-operating with the Ynnari though how much of this is honest and how much of it is just coincidence and how much of it is going to end up with the Craftworld Eldar getting a hilarious dose of their own backstabbing medicine is yet to be revealed. Assuming this plot thread isn't just dropped or ignored by GW, of course.

== Masques ==
7th Edition introduced numerous subfactions of the Harlequins known as Masques. Masques are pretty small compared to most Warhammer subfactions, only consisting of about three squads or Troupes, each lead by a Troupe Master, plus support in the form of vehicles and specialist performers like Death Jesters and Shadowseers. To get an idea for the scale, the novella "The Masque of Vyle" stated that a Masque consisting of two dozen Harlequins was unusually large. The 8th Edition codex retconned this a little by saying that the named Masques were actually "Grand Masques" that contained multiple Masques within them, with each Masque acting as its own autonomous unit and the Midnight Sorrow being said to consist of "many dozens of Masques". Below is a list of the most well-known Masques.

*The Midnight Sorrow: The blue and red ones you see on the box covers. Are the most dedicated to fighting Chaos, and embrace their roles to the point where they lose all trace of their original identities. All their performances are about the dangers of Chaos to the point where the only acts they put on anymore are depictions of the Fall. Helped Eldrad with his ritual to summon Ynnead, and thus became the first Harlequins to support the Ynnari.
*The Veiled Path: Manipulative bastards, with a history of betrayal so great even other Harlequins don't trust them. Their most famous member is Sylandri Veilwalker, AKA clown Eldrad, whose schemes have manipulated figures ranging from [[Fabius Bile]] to [[Belisarius Cawl]]. Helped the Ynnari, but also helped Vect who views them as his greatest enemy so who the fuck knows what they're planning.
*The Frozen Stars: [[Noblebright|Strongly believes that the Eldar race can be saved and their empire rebuilt]]. [[Grimdark|Also believes all non-Eldar races are vermin who should be killed for the Laughing God's amusement]].
*The Dreaming Shadow: Dedicated not to fighting Chaos but the [[Necrons]]. They are known to resent other Harlequins over their disagreement on who the true enemy is, but this sentiment is deliberately exaggerated. Most Harlequins see through this act and hold the Dreaming Shadow in high esteem regardless.
*The Soaring Spite: Dedicated to telling the tales of Cegorach's close ally known as the Cosmic Serpent. As such, are known for using a wide array of jetbikes and skimmers, Harlequin vehicles being named after the Cosmic Serpent's spawn. Are very close to the Craftworld [[Saim-Hann]], supposedly because Saim-Hann's symbol is the Cosmic Serpent but really because both like to go fast.
*The Silent Shroud: A incredibly secretive masque that performs in complete silence. Not only do they not say a word, their weapons are muffled by technology and illusion, making battle against them disorientating and unnerving. As such, they specialize in stealth and terror tactics, like the Night Lords except specializing in the "bad LSD trip" form of horror instead of jumpscares and torture porn.
*The Dance Without End: This Masque specializes in performances that recount the deeds of Cegorach himself, and as such are believed to be the closest to the Laughing God of all his disciples. They were the first Masque to perform the dance representing the Fall of the Eldar. After all of this, they are also ''the'' Masque defending the webway and the Black Library more than any other, and if they dont know a path in the webway, no one does. Despite how this lore makes them sound really fucking important, don't have rules in 8th edition.
*The Shattered Mirage: Compared to The Frozen Stars, The Shattered Mirage believe the Eldar are totally fucked, performing dances that are extremely dark and fatalistic. Thanks to their outlook on life, their preferred tactics are to do as much damage as possible, with little regard for their own lives.
*The Twisted Path: These guys are known for letting their audience members into their plays, only to be spirited away by the Harlequins and never seen again. In battle, they often kidnap both enemies and allies as well as strike in the middle of warzones, sometimes leaving right before victory. They explain their actions with complex riddles and illogical analogies.
*The Reaper's Mirth: The most bloodthirsty of Masques, the Harlequins of The Reaper's Mirth see the battlefield as a canvas for their gory arts. Because of this, they have a larger proportion of Death Jester's among their ranks. They are known for committing atrocities like the [[Grimdark|Fountain of Crimson Tears, which was so horrible that an entire world had to be exterminatused.]] We can only guess what it was. Given stuff like that, it's doubtful the Craftworld or Exodite Eldar want anything to do with them. I mean, ''fuck'' that's Khornate if ever there was any.

== The Players ==
Each Harlequin Masques is made up of a cast of players, that perform the many complex and intricate dances that retell the history, and the many myths of the Eldar species, each performances is led by a troupe master. These Harlequins make up the bulk of each Masque, supported by the Skyweavers, Voidweavers and Starweavers they make up the supporting cast, that without which, no performance could happen.

Shadowseers and Death Jesters take up prominent positions within each Masque but they still take up the role of secondary characters behind the Star Performers, who play the roles of the most important characters in Eldar History. At most the Shadowseer will represent or personify fate while the Death Jester does the same for death. Each of the Eldar Pantheon has a dedicated Eldar taking up their place within the performance, though only two have been revealed so far:

* The [[Solitaire]] - who takes up the role of [[Slaanesh]]. Literally anyone else who attempts the role will go insane, and Solitaires typically do not stay with a particular troop permanently.
* The so called Harlequin King- Who take up the role of [[Cegorach]], the Laughing God itself; who even [[Lelith Hesperax]] doubts she could best. In lieu of the Harlequin King, a Troupe Master represents the Laughing God.
* Although not named, a new player has entered into the performance- who takes up the role of [[Ynnead]].

If GW ever wanted to expand the range on the table top, they could easily turn the Harlequins into a small elite army of powerful Characters, supported by the weaker regular players; who doesn't want too see the Harlequin version of Khaine or Isha?

== We're Our Own Army Now ==

7th edition saw Harlequins get to be their own Faction, with new models for all members of the troupe, plus new models and rules for the Solitaire and a new Eldar jetbike, the Skyweaver. There are also two new vehicles, the Starweaver (a transport) and the Voidweaver. In addition, Shadowseers got their own Psychic Discipline, Phantasmancy. Harlequins survived into 8th and became all sorts of more killy and speedy, and get to freely mingle with their Dark and Craftworld cousins thanks to sharing the Aeldari keyword. Let the show go on!

Now with our own [[Harlequin Masque Creation Tables|faction creation tables.]]

== See Also ==

*[[Harlequin Masque Creation Tables]]
*[[Warhammer 40,000/Tactics/Eldar Harlequins (9E)|Tactics on how to play them.]]

[[Category: Warhammer 40,000]]

[[Category: Xenos]]

[[Category: Eldar]]

[[Category: Harlequins]]

{{Harlequin}}

{{Eldar-Forces}}

{{WH40k-Factions}}

Harlequin

2021-01-31T04:37:05Z

2406:3400:20F:FFC0:91A4:8232:D3C0:65CB: /* Eldar Ambassadors? */

[[File:Eldar Harlequin.jpg|thumb|Break a leg? Why limit myself?]]

{{Topquote|I used to think that my life was a tragedy, but now I realize, it’s a fucking comedy.|Arthur Fleck - Joker (2019)}}

The '''Harlequins''' are galactic clowns. Or more accurately, galactic thespians. Or even more accurately, galactic Juggalos. They are the [[Eldar]] followers of [[Cegorach]], the Laughing God. They are the performers and entertainers of the Eldar, the self-appointed protectors of the Eldar's pre-[[Fall of the Eldar|Fall]] history, which they perform in extremely elaborate plays involving not only elaborate costumes, scenery, acrobatics, and a troupe of dedicated actors, but further elaboration of the drama through [[Psyker|psykana]] and [[Drugs|psychedelic drugs]] which are disseminated throughout the audience that they too may see into clown world. The end result is something like a deranged mixture of a bardic recitation of oral history, a circus, grimdark edgy performance art, elaborate spiritual exercise, and a Grateful Dead concert, dedicated to reenacting and expressing the story of the fall of the Eldar, as both elegy and warning.

Far from being merely performers, though, and despite their rather ludicrous appearance, they are in fact some of the most dangerous shock-troopers among the Eldar, taking the concept of "break a leg" as far as you would expect in [[Warhammer 40,000]]. As self-appointed keepers of history, in addition to reciting and propagating it through performance art, they also maintain and guard the collection of esoteric knowledge deep in the Webway in the hidden [[Black Library]], protecting it from [[Ahzek Ahriman|those who would attempt]] to enter and learn of forbidden lore which they might use for evil and the furtherance of goals of [[Chaos]]. The Harlequins' protection of the Library is almost impenetrable, but they will from time to time allow those who have conquered the [[Chaos]] within them to enter. They have allowed Eldar, other xenos, and [[Just As Planned|even humans]] into the Library at times when their agenda is to fight against Chaos, but they will fight to the death to prevent the Chaotically aligned, or those vulnerable to corruption by Chaos, to enter.

In times of war, the Harlequins fight the foes they see as posing a threat to the very existence of the Eldar, first and foremost [[Chaos Space Marines]], the [[Necron]]s, and the [[Tyranids]]. The [[Imperium|Imperials]] and [[Tau]] can be worked with, and the [[Orks]] are easily manipulated; unlike most Eldar, the Harlequins are free of racial prejudice, so as long as you battle the threats to all things and aren't attacking them or getting in their way, they're perfectly happy to work with you be you Mon'Keigh or Blueberry. This makes them one of the most [[Reasonable Marines|level-minded]] factions in the setting and helps make them a very likeable faction, in contrast to the Craftworlders and Dark Eldar who are hated for being status quo-defending fairies and for being psychotic [[sick fuck]]s.

==The glue that keeps the Eldar together==
They owe no allegiance to any [[Craftworld]], Corsair Fleet, [[Exodite World]], or [[Dark Eldar]] [[Kabal]], but rather recruit members from all factions, and will fight in their armies on all sides. Their only loyalty is to [[Cegorach]], whom they believe has charged them with the "Great Work" of reunifying the Craftworld Eldar, Corsairs, Dark Eldar, and [[Exodite]] Eldar into a single race to fight off [[Slaanesh]], the Necrons, and whoever else has a bone to pick with the chosen people of the [[Old Ones]]. It is notable that they do not use the methods to keep their souls safe that other Eldar do—their faith in Cegorach, complete after going through the Trial to become a Harlequin, is enough to keep them safe. Despite this, they are allowed free passage through the Craftworlds and [[Commorragh]], because the Craftworld and Exodite Eldar respect the Harlequins for preserving their history, and the Dark Eldar and Corsairs <s>are ''too afraid'' to try and stop them</s> find Death Jesters' humor hilarious; they also couldn't keep the Harlequins out if they tried due to the Harlequins' superior knowledge of, and ability to use, the [[Webway]].

This also makes the Harlequins the closest thing to a central authority the Eldar species has. While the various Eldar factions may not necessarily answer to the clowns, when they speak, everyone from Commorragh pimps and Craftworld wizards to Exodite farmers and Corsair pirates stops what they're doing and '''listens'''. Even [[Asdrubael Vect]] has to make sure and pin it on someone else whenever he gets up to skullduggery that might piss them off.

== Eldar Ambassadors? ==
[[Image:Harlequin.jpg|They actually are this hot in the setting, but most people are too busy screaming in pain or fear to comment on it.|thumb|right]]
Harlequins do not necessarily restrict their visits to the Eldar. In the Harlequins' view, they must perform their work for anyone and everyone who may benefit and learn the lessons from The Fall. Thus it is very rare, but not unknown, for Harlequin troupes to visit Imperial worlds. However, it must be noted that given the Imperium's strict policy of xenophobia, the circumstances under which such visits occur almost always coincide with the absence of strict Imperial oversight.

Of course, given the inscrutable nature of Eldar language and art, it is highly debatable whether or not a human audience would even be able to grasp the message that a Harlequin performance was attempting to convey. Most accounts of Harlequin performances amount to something like splatterhouse Shakespeare, with chainsword wielding [[Coenobite]] clowns flinging psychedelic rainbow viscera while the audience trips out on peyote. On the other hand, it is conceivable that Harlequins adjust their performance based on the audience, keeping the performance elaborate in form, but simple in message, thus allowing humans to understand the Great Enemy and what can be done.

In any event, by the time Imperial authorities become fully aware of the presence of a Harlequin troupe, the xenos have inevitably departed. Given the isolated nature of many imperial worlds and the Imperial policy of enforced ignorance, most common inhabitants might find the harlequins as just another passing troupe of strange, incredibly skilled artists, unaware for the most part of their xenos nature. Furthermore, since harlequins only need a webway portal instead of say, a massive starship to get onto a world, no one really discovers they have been in a close encounter of the third kind, at least until some Ordo Xenos operative takes notice. Thus, while in theory Harlequins (as xenos) are not welcome on Imperial worlds, in practice the Imperium can generally do little to stop such visitations.

Another explanation is that while the Ordo Xenos may not be fans, the Ordo Malleus is fully aware that the Eldar know more about Chaos than they do, and that the Harlequins fight Chaos as agents of the Black Library. The Inquisition's desire to obtain that knowledge is therefore probably enough to make them pressure everyone else into not doing anything rash, as long as the Eldar behave as well.

Judging from their allies matrix, it's fortunate that humans at least sometimes listen to them (so far as humans listen to any Eldar, anyway), since on the Tau worlds they visit they are inevitably met with an endless earful about the fucking Greater Good. They don't play on Necron [[Tomb World|Tomb Worlds]] (no shit?) given that the Necrons are the oldest foes of the Eldar and the two have brought each other nothing but grief over the last few billion years, and Harlequins work to fight against them just as hard as they do against Chaos. Don't even fucking ask if they play on Ork worlds (you know, they probably do, but have to reduce the dialogue to indecipherable grunting, swearing and cockney slang). It's presumed that they did try to play for the [[Tyranid]]s only once, but found out the space bug-lizards have no appreciation for art; hence the decision to put the Tyranids right next to Chaos and the Necrons on the mandate to kill-on-sight-and-annoy-the-hell-out-of.

During [[The War of The Beast]], [[Eldrad|Eldrad Ulthran]] sent a troupe of Harlequins to convey a message to the [[God-Emperor of Mankind]], letting Him know that Chaos had to be treated as the primary threat and that the [[Imperial Fists]] successor chapters were on their way. Quite why he thought that anyone would care about the first half of the message whilst the Imperium was literally facing total annihilation at the hands of The Beast no one but Eldrad knows. In another fantastic demonstration of Eldar logic, the Harlequins he sent thought that the best way to pass the message along was to butcher 99% of the Humans they came across whilst shouting "Friendship! Friendship!" Understandably they didn't find willing ears whilst they were eviscerating [[Imperial Guard|Guardsmen]] and [[Adeptus Custodes|Custodians]]. In fairness the humans likely wouldn't have listened anyway but the Eldar plan was definitely the worst one they could have possibly went with considering all that it got them was meeting their end before the Eternity gate. Props for getting that far though. All of them wound up getting [[RIP AND TEAR|massacred]] eventually by the Custodes (not without getting some for themselves), save for [[Lhaeriel Ray]], who was about to be slain by the Captain General save for the intervention of Grandmaster of Assassins [[Drakan Vangorich]] and Inquisitor [[Veritus]]. She was then brought to the ultra-secure Inquisition stronghold under the South Pole, to be interrogated and incarcerated for life. There she displayed a token from [[Vulkan]], who had apparently given it to [[Eldrad]] to indicate "friendship" in some future crisis, and continued to reiterate that she came in peace and to send a message to the Emperor, who she said once counted [[Eldrad|the dick]] as a friend. Eventually, though, Inquisitor [[Marguerethe Wienand|Weinand]] helped her escape to a shuttle where she went off to parts unknown, presumably carrying news of the whole affair and the situation on Terra back to [[Ulthwe]].

==The Final Act, A.K.A. The Last Troll==
In recent years, the Harlequins' war against Chaos has been characterised by a newfound urgency. Full masques have become an ever more common sight among the stars. Appearing from the Webway, they can be found performing within the realms of their kin or battling the galaxy's disparate races in vicious campaigns of apparently random violence. As the 41st Millennium comes to a close, more and more Eldar vanish into the Webway, forsaking their former lives to take up the Harlequin's mask. The Harlequins' numbers are growing, and many among the Eldar wonder why. The truth is inspirational and terrifying in equal measure. At the very heart of the Black Library there lies a silver-lit vault. Therein stands a plinth made of finely graven obstinite, upon which rests a crystalline book said to contain the words of Cegorach himself. Since the Fall, the tome’s covers have remained closed, sealed shut with flickering chains of light. Yet now, long-awaited portents have come to pass. A [[Ahriman|fallen sorcerer]] seeks the lore of the library. A [[Silent King|king]] stirs in his court of death and silence, preparing to rise once more. Within [[Eye of Terror|madness' eye]], the [[Abbadon the Despoiler|champion]] of the [[Ruinous Powers]] prepares to seize [[Cadia|a realm long denied]]. As the signs have come to pass, so the bands of light about the tome have flickered and died.

Now, at last, the tome has fallen open. Within its pages the Shadowseers have found a script, a secret final act that changes utterly the tale of the Fall. Penned in inks of light and shadow, these words present a slender hope, detailing an intricate, galaxy-spanning performance with the potential to change the fate of the Eldar race. Always, the strands of fate have pointed toward the victory of Chaos during the last, mythic battle known to the Eldar as the Rhana Dandra. Yet within the pages of the crystal tome is recorded Cegorach's ultimate and final [[Troll|jest,]] a way to trick Slaanesh into [[Lulz|expending all her power not to destroy the Eldar, but to save them.]] How such an impossibility could come to pass is unclear, for on this matter the final act is infuriatingly vague. Yet the Harlequins take their god's words on faith alone, for their devotion to Cegorach is total and his methods beyond question or reproach. Thus they have begun the steps of this final dance, and will see it completed, or else face absolute destruction in the attempt.

This is now also likely the Eldar species’ final and only hope for survival, period, since Eldrad upgraded from dick to dumb dick and went and boned everything for them, failing in an attempt to awaken [[Ynnead]] early and ended up killing him, all the progress that had gone into him, and the infinity circuits of every craftworld, instead. ''Whoops''. Course, this is probably precisely why the crystalline book opened in the first place, with Cegorach basically going “Oh dear, who could’ve seen that coming? Oh wait, I did, that’s why I have a plan B ready to go for you dumb shmucks. Let’s open it up shall we? And we’re keeping the [[Eldrad|Dick]] out of this one. That fuckup with Ynnead…that wasn’t funny.” 

Until Eldrad didn't, of course. Ynnead seems to be doing just fine, if forming the Yncarne is any indication. Though the Harlequins are still working with them so maybe the plan to trick Slaanesh is still on. Or the Harlequins figure they might as well hedge their bets. If one plan fails, the other might succeed. Or it was the plan all along. In any case, they, like everyone else who understands the scale of the Imperium, may be dicks but aren't stupid enough to truly bring mankind's wrath down on them. Especially since the Inquisition has Inquisitors who know the location of the Black Library...In any case, they're more or less co-operating with the Ynnari though how much of this is honest and how much of it is just coincidence and how much of it is going to end up with the Craftworld Eldar getting a hilarious dose of their own backstabbing medicine is yet to be revealed. Assuming this plot thread isn't just dropped or ignored by GW, of course.

== Masques ==
7th Edition introduced numerous subfactions of the Harlequins known as Masques. Masques are pretty small compared to most Warhammer subfactions, only consisting of about three squads or Troupes, each lead by a Troupe Master, plus support in the form of vehicles and specialist performers like Death Jesters and Shadowseers. To get an idea for the scale, the novella "The Masque of Vyle" stated that a Masque consisting of two dozen Harlequins was unusually large. The 8th Edition codex retconned this a little by saying that the named Masques were actually "Grand Masques" that contained multiple Masques within them, with each Masque acting as its own autonomous unit and the Midnight Sorrow being said to consist of "many dozens of Masques". Below is a list of the most well-known Masques.

*The Midnight Sorrow: The blue and red ones you see on the box covers. Are the most dedicated to fighting Chaos, and embrace their roles to the point where they lose all trace of their original identities. All their performances are about the dangers of Chaos to the point where the only acts they put on anymore are depictions of the Fall. Helped Eldrad with his ritual to summon Ynnead, and thus became the first Harlequins to support the Ynnari.
*The Veiled Path: Manipulative bastards, with a history of betrayal so great even other Harlequins don't trust them. Their most famous member is Sylandri Veilwalker, AKA clown Eldrad, whose schemes have manipulated figures ranging from [[Fabius Bile]] to [[Belisarius Cawl]]. Helped the Ynnari, but also helped Vect who views them as his greatest enemy so who the fuck knows what they're planning.
*The Frozen Stars: [[Noblebright|Strongly believes that the Eldar race can be saved and their empire rebuilt]]. [[Grimdark|Also believes all non-Eldar races are vermin who should be killed for the Laughing God's amusement]].
*The Dreaming Shadow: Dedicated not to fighting Chaos but the [[Necrons]]. They are known to resent other Harlequins over their disagreement on who the true enemy is, but this sentiment is deliberately exaggerated. Most Harlequins see through this act and hold the Dreaming Shadow in high esteem regardless.
*The Soaring Spite: Dedicated to telling the tales of Cegorach's close ally known as the Cosmic Serpent. As such, are known for using a wide array of jetbikes and skimmers, Harlequin vehicles being named after the Cosmic Serpent's spawn. Are very close to the Craftworld [[Saim-Hann]], supposedly because Saim-Hann's symbol is the Cosmic Serpent but really because both like to go fast.
*The Silent Shroud: A incredibly secretive masque that performs in complete silence. Not only do they not say a word, their weapons are muffled by technology and illusion, making battle against them disorientating and unnerving. As such, they specialize in stealth and terror tactics, like the Night Lords except specializing in the "bad LSD trip" form of horror instead of jumpscares and torture porn.
*The Dance Without End: This Masque specializes in performances that recount the deeds of Cegorach himself, and as such are believed to be the closest to the Laughing God of all his disciples. They were the first Masque to perform the dance representing the Fall of the Eldar. After all of this, they are also ''the'' Masque defending the webway and the Black Library more than any other, and if they dont know a path in the webway, no one does. Despite how this lore makes them sound really fucking important, don't have rules in 8th edition.
*The Shattered Mirage: Compared to The Frozen Stars, The Shattered Mirage believe the Eldar are totally fucked, performing dances that are extremely dark and fatalistic. Thanks to their outlook on life, their preferred tactics are to do as much damage as possible, with little regard for their own lives.
*The Twisted Path: These guys are known for letting their audience members into their plays, only to be spirited away by the Harlequins and never seen again. In battle, they often kidnap both enemies and allies as well as strike in the middle of warzones, sometimes leaving right before victory. They explain their actions with complex riddles and illogical analogies.
*The Reaper's Mirth: The most bloodthirsty of Masques, the Harlequins of The Reaper's Mirth see the battlefield as a canvas for their gory arts. Because of this, they have a larger proportion of Death Jester's among their ranks. They are known for committing atrocities like the [[Grimdark|Fountain of Crimson Tears, which was so horrible that an entire world had to be exterminatused.]] We can only guess what it was. Given stuff like that, it's doubtful the Craftworld or Exodite Eldar want anything to do with them. I mean, ''fuck'' that's Khornate if ever there was any.

== The Players ==
Each Harlequin Masques is made up of a cast of players, that perform the many complex and intricate dances that retell the history, and the many myths of the Eldar species, each performances is led by a troupe master. These Harlequins make up the bulk of each Masque, supported by the Skyweavers, Voidweavers and Starweavers they make up the supporting cast, that without which, no performance could happen.

Shadowseers and Death Jesters take up prominent positions within each Masque but they still take up the role of secondary characters behind the Star Performers, who play the roles of the most important characters in Eldar History. At most the Shadowseer will represent or personify fate while the Death Jester does the same for death. Each of the Eldar Pantheon has a dedicated Eldar taking up their place within the performance, though only two have been revealed so far:

* The [[Solitaire]] - who takes up the role of [[Slaanesh]]. Literally anyone else who attempts the role will go insane, and Solitaires typically do not stay with a particular troop permanently.
* The so called Harlequin King- Who take up the role of [[Cegorach]], the Laughing God itself; who even [[Lelith Hesperax]] doubts she could best. In lieu of the Harlequin King, a Troupe Master represents the Laughing God.
* Although not named, a new player has entered into the performance- who takes up the role of [[Ynnead]].

If GW ever wanted to expand the range on the table top, they could easily turn the Harlequins into a small elite army of powerful Characters, supported by the weaker regular players; who doesn't want too see the Harlequin version of Khaine or Isha?

== We're Our Own Army Now ==

7th edition saw Harlequins get to be their own Faction, with new models for all members of the troupe, plus new models and rules for the Solitaire and a new Eldar jetbike, the Skyweaver. There are also two new vehicles, the Starweaver (a transport) and the Voidweaver. In addition, Shadowseers got their own Psychic Discipline, Phantasmancy. Harlequins survived into 8th and became all sorts of more killy and speedy, and get to freely mingle with their Dark and Craftworld cousins thanks to sharing the Aeldari keyword. Let the show go on!

Now with our own [[Harlequin Masque Creation Tables|faction creation tables.]]

== See Also ==

*[[Harlequin Masque Creation Tables]]
*[[Warhammer 40,000/Tactics/Eldar Harlequins (9E)|Tactics on how to play them.]]

[[Category: Warhammer 40,000]]

[[Category: Xenos]]

[[Category: Eldar]]

[[Category: Harlequins]]

{{Harlequin}}

{{Eldar-Forces}}

{{WH40k-Factions}}

Harlequin

2021-01-31T04:36:00Z

2406:3400:20F:FFC0:91A4:8232:D3C0:65CB:

[[File:Eldar Harlequin.jpg|thumb|Break a leg? Why limit myself?]]

{{Topquote|I used to think that my life was a tragedy, but now I realize, it’s a fucking comedy.|Arthur Fleck - Joker (2019)}}

The '''Harlequins''' are galactic clowns. Or more accurately, galactic thespians. Or even more accurately, galactic Juggalos. They are the [[Eldar]] followers of [[Cegorach]], the Laughing God. They are the performers and entertainers of the Eldar, the self-appointed protectors of the Eldar's pre-[[Fall of the Eldar|Fall]] history, which they perform in extremely elaborate plays involving not only elaborate costumes, scenery, acrobatics, and a troupe of dedicated actors, but further elaboration of the drama through [[Psyker|psykana]] and [[Drugs|psychedelic drugs]] which are disseminated throughout the audience that they too may see into clown world. The end result is something like a deranged mixture of a bardic recitation of oral history, a circus, grimdark edgy performance art, elaborate spiritual exercise, and a Grateful Dead concert, dedicated to reenacting and expressing the story of the fall of the Eldar, as both elegy and warning.

Far from being merely performers, though, and despite their rather ludicrous appearance, they are in fact some of the most dangerous shock-troopers among the Eldar, taking the concept of "break a leg" as far as you would expect in [[Warhammer 40,000]]. As self-appointed keepers of history, in addition to reciting and propagating it through performance art, they also maintain and guard the collection of esoteric knowledge deep in the Webway in the hidden [[Black Library]], protecting it from [[Ahzek Ahriman|those who would attempt]] to enter and learn of forbidden lore which they might use for evil and the furtherance of goals of [[Chaos]]. The Harlequins' protection of the Library is almost impenetrable, but they will from time to time allow those who have conquered the [[Chaos]] within them to enter. They have allowed Eldar, other xenos, and [[Just As Planned|even humans]] into the Library at times when their agenda is to fight against Chaos, but they will fight to the death to prevent the Chaotically aligned, or those vulnerable to corruption by Chaos, to enter.

In times of war, the Harlequins fight the foes they see as posing a threat to the very existence of the Eldar, first and foremost [[Chaos Space Marines]], the [[Necron]]s, and the [[Tyranids]]. The [[Imperium|Imperials]] and [[Tau]] can be worked with, and the [[Orks]] are easily manipulated; unlike most Eldar, the Harlequins are free of racial prejudice, so as long as you battle the threats to all things and aren't attacking them or getting in their way, they're perfectly happy to work with you be you Mon'Keigh or Blueberry. This makes them one of the most [[Reasonable Marines|level-minded]] factions in the setting and helps make them a very likeable faction, in contrast to the Craftworlders and Dark Eldar who are hated for being status quo-defending fairies and for being psychotic [[sick fuck]]s.

==The glue that keeps the Eldar together==
They owe no allegiance to any [[Craftworld]], Corsair Fleet, [[Exodite World]], or [[Dark Eldar]] [[Kabal]], but rather recruit members from all factions, and will fight in their armies on all sides. Their only loyalty is to [[Cegorach]], whom they believe has charged them with the "Great Work" of reunifying the Craftworld Eldar, Corsairs, Dark Eldar, and [[Exodite]] Eldar into a single race to fight off [[Slaanesh]], the Necrons, and whoever else has a bone to pick with the chosen people of the [[Old Ones]]. It is notable that they do not use the methods to keep their souls safe that other Eldar do—their faith in Cegorach, complete after going through the Trial to become a Harlequin, is enough to keep them safe. Despite this, they are allowed free passage through the Craftworlds and [[Commorragh]], because the Craftworld and Exodite Eldar respect the Harlequins for preserving their history, and the Dark Eldar and Corsairs <s>are ''too afraid'' to try and stop them</s> find Death Jesters' humor hilarious; they also couldn't keep the Harlequins out if they tried due to the Harlequins' superior knowledge of, and ability to use, the [[Webway]].

This also makes the Harlequins the closest thing to a central authority the Eldar species has. While the various Eldar factions may not necessarily answer to the clowns, when they speak, everyone from Commorragh pimps and Craftworld wizards to Exodite farmers and Corsair pirates stops what they're doing and '''listens'''. Even [[Asdrubael Vect]] has to make sure and pin it on someone else whenever he gets up to skullduggery that might piss them off.

== Eldar Ambassadors? ==
[[Image:Harlequin.jpg|They actually are this hot in the series, but most people are too busy screaming in pain to comment on it.|thumb|right]]
Harlequins do not necessarily restrict their visits to the Eldar. In the Harlequins' view, they must perform their work for anyone and everyone who may benefit and learn the lessons from The Fall. Thus it is very rare, but not unknown, for Harlequin troupes to visit Imperial worlds. However, it must be noted that given the Imperium's strict policy of xenophobia, the circumstances under which such visits occur almost always coincide with the absence of strict Imperial oversight.

Of course, given the inscrutable nature of Eldar language and art, it is highly debatable whether or not a human audience would even be able to grasp the message that a Harlequin performance was attempting to convey. Most accounts of Harlequin performances amount to something like splatterhouse Shakespeare, with chainsword wielding [[Coenobite]] clowns flinging psychedelic rainbow viscera while the audience trips out on peyote. On the other hand, it is conceivable that Harlequins adjust their performance based on the audience, keeping the performance elaborate in form, but simple in message, thus allowing humans to understand the Great Enemy and what can be done.

In any event, by the time Imperial authorities become fully aware of the presence of a Harlequin troupe, the xenos have inevitably departed. Given the isolated nature of many imperial worlds and the Imperial policy of enforced ignorance, most common inhabitants might find the harlequins as just another passing troupe of strange, incredibly skilled artists, unaware for the most part of their xenos nature. Furthermore, since harlequins only need a webway portal instead of say, a massive starship to get onto a world, no one really discovers they have been in a close encounter of the third kind, at least until some Ordo Xenos operative takes notice. Thus, while in theory Harlequins (as xenos) are not welcome on Imperial worlds, in practice the Imperium can generally do little to stop such visitations.

Another explanation is that while the Ordo Xenos may not be fans, the Ordo Malleus is fully aware that the Eldar know more about Chaos than they do, and that the Harlequins fight Chaos as agents of the Black Library. The Inquisition's desire to obtain that knowledge is therefore probably enough to make them pressure everyone else into not doing anything rash, as long as the Eldar behave as well.

Judging from their allies matrix, it's fortunate that humans at least sometimes listen to them (so far as humans listen to any Eldar, anyway), since on the Tau worlds they visit they are inevitably met with an endless earful about the fucking Greater Good. They don't play on Necron [[Tomb World|Tomb Worlds]] (no shit?) given that the Necrons are the oldest foes of the Eldar and the two have brought each other nothing but grief over the last few billion years, and Harlequins work to fight against them just as hard as they do against Chaos. Don't even fucking ask if they play on Ork worlds (you know, they probably do, but have to reduce the dialogue to indecipherable grunting, swearing and cockney slang). It's presumed that they did try to play for the [[Tyranid]]s only once, but found out the space bug-lizards have no appreciation for art; hence the decision to put the Tyranids right next to Chaos and the Necrons on the mandate to kill-on-sight-and-annoy-the-hell-out-of.

During [[The War of The Beast]], [[Eldrad|Eldrad Ulthran]] sent a troupe of Harlequins to convey a message to the [[God-Emperor of Mankind]], letting Him know that Chaos had to be treated as the primary threat and that the [[Imperial Fists]] successor chapters were on their way. Quite why he thought that anyone would care about the first half of the message whilst the Imperium was literally facing total annihilation at the hands of The Beast no one but Eldrad knows. In another fantastic demonstration of Eldar logic, the Harlequins he sent thought that the best way to pass the message along was to butcher 99% of the Humans they came across whilst shouting "Friendship! Friendship!" Understandably they didn't find willing ears whilst they were eviscerating [[Imperial Guard|Guardsmen]] and [[Adeptus Custodes|Custodians]]. In fairness the humans likely wouldn't have listened anyway but the Eldar plan was definitely the worst one they could have possibly went with considering all that it got them was meeting their end before the Eternity gate. Props for getting that far though. All of them wound up getting [[RIP AND TEAR|massacred]] eventually by the Custodes (not without getting some for themselves), save for [[Lhaeriel Ray]], who was about to be slain by the Captain General save for the intervention of Grandmaster of Assassins [[Drakan Vangorich]] and Inquisitor [[Veritus]]. She was then brought to the ultra-secure Inquisition stronghold under the South Pole, to be interrogated and incarcerated for life. There she displayed a token from [[Vulkan]], who had apparently given it to [[Eldrad]] to indicate "friendship" in some future crisis, and continued to reiterate that she came in peace and to send a message to the Emperor, who she said once counted [[Eldrad|the dick]] as a friend. Eventually, though, Inquisitor [[Marguerethe Wienand|Weinand]] helped her escape to a shuttle where she went off to parts unknown, presumably carrying news of the whole affair and the situation on Terra back to [[Ulthwe]].

==The Final Act, A.K.A. The Last Troll==
In recent years, the Harlequins' war against Chaos has been characterised by a newfound urgency. Full masques have become an ever more common sight among the stars. Appearing from the Webway, they can be found performing within the realms of their kin or battling the galaxy's disparate races in vicious campaigns of apparently random violence. As the 41st Millennium comes to a close, more and more Eldar vanish into the Webway, forsaking their former lives to take up the Harlequin's mask. The Harlequins' numbers are growing, and many among the Eldar wonder why. The truth is inspirational and terrifying in equal measure. At the very heart of the Black Library there lies a silver-lit vault. Therein stands a plinth made of finely graven obstinite, upon which rests a crystalline book said to contain the words of Cegorach himself. Since the Fall, the tome’s covers have remained closed, sealed shut with flickering chains of light. Yet now, long-awaited portents have come to pass. A [[Ahriman|fallen sorcerer]] seeks the lore of the library. A [[Silent King|king]] stirs in his court of death and silence, preparing to rise once more. Within [[Eye of Terror|madness' eye]], the [[Abbadon the Despoiler|champion]] of the [[Ruinous Powers]] prepares to seize [[Cadia|a realm long denied]]. As the signs have come to pass, so the bands of light about the tome have flickered and died.

Now, at last, the tome has fallen open. Within its pages the Shadowseers have found a script, a secret final act that changes utterly the tale of the Fall. Penned in inks of light and shadow, these words present a slender hope, detailing an intricate, galaxy-spanning performance with the potential to change the fate of the Eldar race. Always, the strands of fate have pointed toward the victory of Chaos during the last, mythic battle known to the Eldar as the Rhana Dandra. Yet within the pages of the crystal tome is recorded Cegorach's ultimate and final [[Troll|jest,]] a way to trick Slaanesh into [[Lulz|expending all her power not to destroy the Eldar, but to save them.]] How such an impossibility could come to pass is unclear, for on this matter the final act is infuriatingly vague. Yet the Harlequins take their god's words on faith alone, for their devotion to Cegorach is total and his methods beyond question or reproach. Thus they have begun the steps of this final dance, and will see it completed, or else face absolute destruction in the attempt.

This is now also likely the Eldar species’ final and only hope for survival, period, since Eldrad upgraded from dick to dumb dick and went and boned everything for them, failing in an attempt to awaken [[Ynnead]] early and ended up killing him, all the progress that had gone into him, and the infinity circuits of every craftworld, instead. ''Whoops''. Course, this is probably precisely why the crystalline book opened in the first place, with Cegorach basically going “Oh dear, who could’ve seen that coming? Oh wait, I did, that’s why I have a plan B ready to go for you dumb shmucks. Let’s open it up shall we? And we’re keeping the [[Eldrad|Dick]] out of this one. That fuckup with Ynnead…that wasn’t funny.” 

Until Eldrad didn't, of course. Ynnead seems to be doing just fine, if forming the Yncarne is any indication. Though the Harlequins are still working with them so maybe the plan to trick Slaanesh is still on. Or the Harlequins figure they might as well hedge their bets. If one plan fails, the other might succeed. Or it was the plan all along. In any case, they, like everyone else who understands the scale of the Imperium, may be dicks but aren't stupid enough to truly bring mankind's wrath down on them. Especially since the Inquisition has Inquisitors who know the location of the Black Library...In any case, they're more or less co-operating with the Ynnari though how much of this is honest and how much of it is just coincidence and how much of it is going to end up with the Craftworld Eldar getting a hilarious dose of their own backstabbing medicine is yet to be revealed. Assuming this plot thread isn't just dropped or ignored by GW, of course.

== Masques ==
7th Edition introduced numerous subfactions of the Harlequins known as Masques. Masques are pretty small compared to most Warhammer subfactions, only consisting of about three squads or Troupes, each lead by a Troupe Master, plus support in the form of vehicles and specialist performers like Death Jesters and Shadowseers. To get an idea for the scale, the novella "The Masque of Vyle" stated that a Masque consisting of two dozen Harlequins was unusually large. The 8th Edition codex retconned this a little by saying that the named Masques were actually "Grand Masques" that contained multiple Masques within them, with each Masque acting as its own autonomous unit and the Midnight Sorrow being said to consist of "many dozens of Masques". Below is a list of the most well-known Masques.

*The Midnight Sorrow: The blue and red ones you see on the box covers. Are the most dedicated to fighting Chaos, and embrace their roles to the point where they lose all trace of their original identities. All their performances are about the dangers of Chaos to the point where the only acts they put on anymore are depictions of the Fall. Helped Eldrad with his ritual to summon Ynnead, and thus became the first Harlequins to support the Ynnari.
*The Veiled Path: Manipulative bastards, with a history of betrayal so great even other Harlequins don't trust them. Their most famous member is Sylandri Veilwalker, AKA clown Eldrad, whose schemes have manipulated figures ranging from [[Fabius Bile]] to [[Belisarius Cawl]]. Helped the Ynnari, but also helped Vect who views them as his greatest enemy so who the fuck knows what they're planning.
*The Frozen Stars: [[Noblebright|Strongly believes that the Eldar race can be saved and their empire rebuilt]]. [[Grimdark|Also believes all non-Eldar races are vermin who should be killed for the Laughing God's amusement]].
*The Dreaming Shadow: Dedicated not to fighting Chaos but the [[Necrons]]. They are known to resent other Harlequins over their disagreement on who the true enemy is, but this sentiment is deliberately exaggerated. Most Harlequins see through this act and hold the Dreaming Shadow in high esteem regardless.
*The Soaring Spite: Dedicated to telling the tales of Cegorach's close ally known as the Cosmic Serpent. As such, are known for using a wide array of jetbikes and skimmers, Harlequin vehicles being named after the Cosmic Serpent's spawn. Are very close to the Craftworld [[Saim-Hann]], supposedly because Saim-Hann's symbol is the Cosmic Serpent but really because both like to go fast.
*The Silent Shroud: A incredibly secretive masque that performs in complete silence. Not only do they not say a word, their weapons are muffled by technology and illusion, making battle against them disorientating and unnerving. As such, they specialize in stealth and terror tactics, like the Night Lords except specializing in the "bad LSD trip" form of horror instead of jumpscares and torture porn.
*The Dance Without End: This Masque specializes in performances that recount the deeds of Cegorach himself, and as such are believed to be the closest to the Laughing God of all his disciples. They were the first Masque to perform the dance representing the Fall of the Eldar. After all of this, they are also ''the'' Masque defending the webway and the Black Library more than any other, and if they dont know a path in the webway, no one does. Despite how this lore makes them sound really fucking important, don't have rules in 8th edition.
*The Shattered Mirage: Compared to The Frozen Stars, The Shattered Mirage believe the Eldar are totally fucked, performing dances that are extremely dark and fatalistic. Thanks to their outlook on life, their preferred tactics are to do as much damage as possible, with little regard for their own lives.
*The Twisted Path: These guys are known for letting their audience members into their plays, only to be spirited away by the Harlequins and never seen again. In battle, they often kidnap both enemies and allies as well as strike in the middle of warzones, sometimes leaving right before victory. They explain their actions with complex riddles and illogical analogies.
*The Reaper's Mirth: The most bloodthirsty of Masques, the Harlequins of The Reaper's Mirth see the battlefield as a canvas for their gory arts. Because of this, they have a larger proportion of Death Jester's among their ranks. They are known for committing atrocities like the [[Grimdark|Fountain of Crimson Tears, which was so horrible that an entire world had to be exterminatused.]] We can only guess what it was. Given stuff like that, it's doubtful the Craftworld or Exodite Eldar want anything to do with them. I mean, ''fuck'' that's Khornate if ever there was any.

== The Players ==
Each Harlequin Masques is made up of a cast of players, that perform the many complex and intricate dances that retell the history, and the many myths of the Eldar species, each performances is led by a troupe master. These Harlequins make up the bulk of each Masque, supported by the Skyweavers, Voidweavers and Starweavers they make up the supporting cast, that without which, no performance could happen.

Shadowseers and Death Jesters take up prominent positions within each Masque but they still take up the role of secondary characters behind the Star Performers, who play the roles of the most important characters in Eldar History. At most the Shadowseer will represent or personify fate while the Death Jester does the same for death. Each of the Eldar Pantheon has a dedicated Eldar taking up their place within the performance, though only two have been revealed so far:

* The [[Solitaire]] - who takes up the role of [[Slaanesh]]. Literally anyone else who attempts the role will go insane, and Solitaires typically do not stay with a particular troop permanently.
* The so called Harlequin King- Who take up the role of [[Cegorach]], the Laughing God itself; who even [[Lelith Hesperax]] doubts she could best. In lieu of the Harlequin King, a Troupe Master represents the Laughing God.
* Although not named, a new player has entered into the performance- who takes up the role of [[Ynnead]].

If GW ever wanted to expand the range on the table top, they could easily turn the Harlequins into a small elite army of powerful Characters, supported by the weaker regular players; who doesn't want too see the Harlequin version of Khaine or Isha?

== We're Our Own Army Now ==

7th edition saw Harlequins get to be their own Faction, with new models for all members of the troupe, plus new models and rules for the Solitaire and a new Eldar jetbike, the Skyweaver. There are also two new vehicles, the Starweaver (a transport) and the Voidweaver. In addition, Shadowseers got their own Psychic Discipline, Phantasmancy. Harlequins survived into 8th and became all sorts of more killy and speedy, and get to freely mingle with their Dark and Craftworld cousins thanks to sharing the Aeldari keyword. Let the show go on!

Now with our own [[Harlequin Masque Creation Tables|faction creation tables.]]

== See Also ==

*[[Harlequin Masque Creation Tables]]
*[[Warhammer 40,000/Tactics/Eldar Harlequins (9E)|Tactics on how to play them.]]

[[Category: Warhammer 40,000]]

[[Category: Xenos]]

[[Category: Eldar]]

[[Category: Harlequins]]

{{Harlequin}}

{{Eldar-Forces}}

{{WH40k-Factions}}

Harlequin

2021-01-31T04:35:26Z

2406:3400:20F:FFC0:91A4:8232:D3C0:65CB:

[[File:Eldar Harlequin.jpg|thumb|Break a leg? Why limit myself?]]

{{Topquote|I used to think that my life was a tragedy, but now I realize, it’s a fucking comedy.|Arthur Fleck - ''Joker'' (2019)}}

The '''Harlequins''' are galactic clowns. Or more accurately, galactic thespians. Or even more accurately, galactic Juggalos. They are the [[Eldar]] followers of [[Cegorach]], the Laughing God. They are the performers and entertainers of the Eldar, the self-appointed protectors of the Eldar's pre-[[Fall of the Eldar|Fall]] history, which they perform in extremely elaborate plays involving not only elaborate costumes, scenery, acrobatics, and a troupe of dedicated actors, but further elaboration of the drama through [[Psyker|psykana]] and [[Drugs|psychedelic drugs]] which are disseminated throughout the audience that they too may see into clown world. The end result is something like a deranged mixture of a bardic recitation of oral history, a circus, grimdark edgy performance art, elaborate spiritual exercise, and a Grateful Dead concert, dedicated to reenacting and expressing the story of the fall of the Eldar, as both elegy and warning.

Far from being merely performers, though, and despite their rather ludicrous appearance, they are in fact some of the most dangerous shock-troopers among the Eldar, taking the concept of "break a leg" as far as you would expect in [[Warhammer 40,000]]. As self-appointed keepers of history, in addition to reciting and propagating it through performance art, they also maintain and guard the collection of esoteric knowledge deep in the Webway in the hidden [[Black Library]], protecting it from [[Ahzek Ahriman|those who would attempt]] to enter and learn of forbidden lore which they might use for evil and the furtherance of goals of [[Chaos]]. The Harlequins' protection of the Library is almost impenetrable, but they will from time to time allow those who have conquered the [[Chaos]] within them to enter. They have allowed Eldar, other xenos, and [[Just As Planned|even humans]] into the Library at times when their agenda is to fight against Chaos, but they will fight to the death to prevent the Chaotically aligned, or those vulnerable to corruption by Chaos, to enter.

In times of war, the Harlequins fight the foes they see as posing a threat to the very existence of the Eldar, first and foremost [[Chaos Space Marines]], the [[Necron]]s, and the [[Tyranids]]. The [[Imperium|Imperials]] and [[Tau]] can be worked with, and the [[Orks]] are easily manipulated; unlike most Eldar, the Harlequins are free of racial prejudice, so as long as you battle the threats to all things and aren't attacking them or getting in their way, they're perfectly happy to work with you be you Mon'Keigh or Blueberry. This makes them one of the most [[Reasonable Marines|level-minded]] factions in the setting and helps make them a very likeable faction, in contrast to the Craftworlders and Dark Eldar who are hated for being status quo-defending fairies and for being psychotic [[sick fuck]]s.

==The glue that keeps the Eldar together==
They owe no allegiance to any [[Craftworld]], Corsair Fleet, [[Exodite World]], or [[Dark Eldar]] [[Kabal]], but rather recruit members from all factions, and will fight in their armies on all sides. Their only loyalty is to [[Cegorach]], whom they believe has charged them with the "Great Work" of reunifying the Craftworld Eldar, Corsairs, Dark Eldar, and [[Exodite]] Eldar into a single race to fight off [[Slaanesh]], the Necrons, and whoever else has a bone to pick with the chosen people of the [[Old Ones]]. It is notable that they do not use the methods to keep their souls safe that other Eldar do—their faith in Cegorach, complete after going through the Trial to become a Harlequin, is enough to keep them safe. Despite this, they are allowed free passage through the Craftworlds and [[Commorragh]], because the Craftworld and Exodite Eldar respect the Harlequins for preserving their history, and the Dark Eldar and Corsairs <s>are ''too afraid'' to try and stop them</s> find Death Jesters' humor hilarious; they also couldn't keep the Harlequins out if they tried due to the Harlequins' superior knowledge of, and ability to use, the [[Webway]].

This also makes the Harlequins the closest thing to a central authority the Eldar species has. While the various Eldar factions may not necessarily answer to the clowns, when they speak, everyone from Commorragh pimps and Craftworld wizards to Exodite farmers and Corsair pirates stops what they're doing and '''listens'''. Even [[Asdrubael Vect]] has to make sure and pin it on someone else whenever he gets up to skullduggery that might piss them off.

== Eldar Ambassadors? ==
[[Image:Harlequin.jpg|They actually are this hot in the series, but most people are too busy screaming in pain to comment on it.|thumb|right]]
Harlequins do not necessarily restrict their visits to the Eldar. In the Harlequins' view, they must perform their work for anyone and everyone who may benefit and learn the lessons from The Fall. Thus it is very rare, but not unknown, for Harlequin troupes to visit Imperial worlds. However, it must be noted that given the Imperium's strict policy of xenophobia, the circumstances under which such visits occur almost always coincide with the absence of strict Imperial oversight.

Of course, given the inscrutable nature of Eldar language and art, it is highly debatable whether or not a human audience would even be able to grasp the message that a Harlequin performance was attempting to convey. Most accounts of Harlequin performances amount to something like splatterhouse Shakespeare, with chainsword wielding [[Coenobite]] clowns flinging psychedelic rainbow viscera while the audience trips out on peyote. On the other hand, it is conceivable that Harlequins adjust their performance based on the audience, keeping the performance elaborate in form, but simple in message, thus allowing humans to understand the Great Enemy and what can be done.

In any event, by the time Imperial authorities become fully aware of the presence of a Harlequin troupe, the xenos have inevitably departed. Given the isolated nature of many imperial worlds and the Imperial policy of enforced ignorance, most common inhabitants might find the harlequins as just another passing troupe of strange, incredibly skilled artists, unaware for the most part of their xenos nature. Furthermore, since harlequins only need a webway portal instead of say, a massive starship to get onto a world, no one really discovers they have been in a close encounter of the third kind, at least until some Ordo Xenos operative takes notice. Thus, while in theory Harlequins (as xenos) are not welcome on Imperial worlds, in practice the Imperium can generally do little to stop such visitations.

Another explanation is that while the Ordo Xenos may not be fans, the Ordo Malleus is fully aware that the Eldar know more about Chaos than they do, and that the Harlequins fight Chaos as agents of the Black Library. The Inquisition's desire to obtain that knowledge is therefore probably enough to make them pressure everyone else into not doing anything rash, as long as the Eldar behave as well.

Judging from their allies matrix, it's fortunate that humans at least sometimes listen to them (so far as humans listen to any Eldar, anyway), since on the Tau worlds they visit they are inevitably met with an endless earful about the fucking Greater Good. They don't play on Necron [[Tomb World|Tomb Worlds]] (no shit?) given that the Necrons are the oldest foes of the Eldar and the two have brought each other nothing but grief over the last few billion years, and Harlequins work to fight against them just as hard as they do against Chaos. Don't even fucking ask if they play on Ork worlds (you know, they probably do, but have to reduce the dialogue to indecipherable grunting, swearing and cockney slang). It's presumed that they did try to play for the [[Tyranid]]s only once, but found out the space bug-lizards have no appreciation for art; hence the decision to put the Tyranids right next to Chaos and the Necrons on the mandate to kill-on-sight-and-annoy-the-hell-out-of.

During [[The War of The Beast]], [[Eldrad|Eldrad Ulthran]] sent a troupe of Harlequins to convey a message to the [[God-Emperor of Mankind]], letting Him know that Chaos had to be treated as the primary threat and that the [[Imperial Fists]] successor chapters were on their way. Quite why he thought that anyone would care about the first half of the message whilst the Imperium was literally facing total annihilation at the hands of The Beast no one but Eldrad knows. In another fantastic demonstration of Eldar logic, the Harlequins he sent thought that the best way to pass the message along was to butcher 99% of the Humans they came across whilst shouting "Friendship! Friendship!" Understandably they didn't find willing ears whilst they were eviscerating [[Imperial Guard|Guardsmen]] and [[Adeptus Custodes|Custodians]]. In fairness the humans likely wouldn't have listened anyway but the Eldar plan was definitely the worst one they could have possibly went with considering all that it got them was meeting their end before the Eternity gate. Props for getting that far though. All of them wound up getting [[RIP AND TEAR|massacred]] eventually by the Custodes (not without getting some for themselves), save for [[Lhaeriel Ray]], who was about to be slain by the Captain General save for the intervention of Grandmaster of Assassins [[Drakan Vangorich]] and Inquisitor [[Veritus]]. She was then brought to the ultra-secure Inquisition stronghold under the South Pole, to be interrogated and incarcerated for life. There she displayed a token from [[Vulkan]], who had apparently given it to [[Eldrad]] to indicate "friendship" in some future crisis, and continued to reiterate that she came in peace and to send a message to the Emperor, who she said once counted [[Eldrad|the dick]] as a friend. Eventually, though, Inquisitor [[Marguerethe Wienand|Weinand]] helped her escape to a shuttle where she went off to parts unknown, presumably carrying news of the whole affair and the situation on Terra back to [[Ulthwe]].

==The Final Act, A.K.A. The Last Troll==
In recent years, the Harlequins' war against Chaos has been characterised by a newfound urgency. Full masques have become an ever more common sight among the stars. Appearing from the Webway, they can be found performing within the realms of their kin or battling the galaxy's disparate races in vicious campaigns of apparently random violence. As the 41st Millennium comes to a close, more and more Eldar vanish into the Webway, forsaking their former lives to take up the Harlequin's mask. The Harlequins' numbers are growing, and many among the Eldar wonder why. The truth is inspirational and terrifying in equal measure. At the very heart of the Black Library there lies a silver-lit vault. Therein stands a plinth made of finely graven obstinite, upon which rests a crystalline book said to contain the words of Cegorach himself. Since the Fall, the tome’s covers have remained closed, sealed shut with flickering chains of light. Yet now, long-awaited portents have come to pass. A [[Ahriman|fallen sorcerer]] seeks the lore of the library. A [[Silent King|king]] stirs in his court of death and silence, preparing to rise once more. Within [[Eye of Terror|madness' eye]], the [[Abbadon the Despoiler|champion]] of the [[Ruinous Powers]] prepares to seize [[Cadia|a realm long denied]]. As the signs have come to pass, so the bands of light about the tome have flickered and died.

Now, at last, the tome has fallen open. Within its pages the Shadowseers have found a script, a secret final act that changes utterly the tale of the Fall. Penned in inks of light and shadow, these words present a slender hope, detailing an intricate, galaxy-spanning performance with the potential to change the fate of the Eldar race. Always, the strands of fate have pointed toward the victory of Chaos during the last, mythic battle known to the Eldar as the Rhana Dandra. Yet within the pages of the crystal tome is recorded Cegorach's ultimate and final [[Troll|jest,]] a way to trick Slaanesh into [[Lulz|expending all her power not to destroy the Eldar, but to save them.]] How such an impossibility could come to pass is unclear, for on this matter the final act is infuriatingly vague. Yet the Harlequins take their god's words on faith alone, for their devotion to Cegorach is total and his methods beyond question or reproach. Thus they have begun the steps of this final dance, and will see it completed, or else face absolute destruction in the attempt.

This is now also likely the Eldar species’ final and only hope for survival, period, since Eldrad upgraded from dick to dumb dick and went and boned everything for them, failing in an attempt to awaken [[Ynnead]] early and ended up killing him, all the progress that had gone into him, and the infinity circuits of every craftworld, instead. ''Whoops''. Course, this is probably precisely why the crystalline book opened in the first place, with Cegorach basically going “Oh dear, who could’ve seen that coming? Oh wait, I did, that’s why I have a plan B ready to go for you dumb shmucks. Let’s open it up shall we? And we’re keeping the [[Eldrad|Dick]] out of this one. That fuckup with Ynnead…that wasn’t funny.” 

Until Eldrad didn't, of course. Ynnead seems to be doing just fine, if forming the Yncarne is any indication. Though the Harlequins are still working with them so maybe the plan to trick Slaanesh is still on. Or the Harlequins figure they might as well hedge their bets. If one plan fails, the other might succeed. Or it was the plan all along. In any case, they, like everyone else who understands the scale of the Imperium, may be dicks but aren't stupid enough to truly bring mankind's wrath down on them. Especially since the Inquisition has Inquisitors who know the location of the Black Library...In any case, they're more or less co-operating with the Ynnari though how much of this is honest and how much of it is just coincidence and how much of it is going to end up with the Craftworld Eldar getting a hilarious dose of their own backstabbing medicine is yet to be revealed. Assuming this plot thread isn't just dropped or ignored by GW, of course.

== Masques ==
7th Edition introduced numerous subfactions of the Harlequins known as Masques. Masques are pretty small compared to most Warhammer subfactions, only consisting of about three squads or Troupes, each lead by a Troupe Master, plus support in the form of vehicles and specialist performers like Death Jesters and Shadowseers. To get an idea for the scale, the novella "The Masque of Vyle" stated that a Masque consisting of two dozen Harlequins was unusually large. The 8th Edition codex retconned this a little by saying that the named Masques were actually "Grand Masques" that contained multiple Masques within them, with each Masque acting as its own autonomous unit and the Midnight Sorrow being said to consist of "many dozens of Masques". Below is a list of the most well-known Masques.

*The Midnight Sorrow: The blue and red ones you see on the box covers. Are the most dedicated to fighting Chaos, and embrace their roles to the point where they lose all trace of their original identities. All their performances are about the dangers of Chaos to the point where the only acts they put on anymore are depictions of the Fall. Helped Eldrad with his ritual to summon Ynnead, and thus became the first Harlequins to support the Ynnari.
*The Veiled Path: Manipulative bastards, with a history of betrayal so great even other Harlequins don't trust them. Their most famous member is Sylandri Veilwalker, AKA clown Eldrad, whose schemes have manipulated figures ranging from [[Fabius Bile]] to [[Belisarius Cawl]]. Helped the Ynnari, but also helped Vect who views them as his greatest enemy so who the fuck knows what they're planning.
*The Frozen Stars: [[Noblebright|Strongly believes that the Eldar race can be saved and their empire rebuilt]]. [[Grimdark|Also believes all non-Eldar races are vermin who should be killed for the Laughing God's amusement]].
*The Dreaming Shadow: Dedicated not to fighting Chaos but the [[Necrons]]. They are known to resent other Harlequins over their disagreement on who the true enemy is, but this sentiment is deliberately exaggerated. Most Harlequins see through this act and hold the Dreaming Shadow in high esteem regardless.
*The Soaring Spite: Dedicated to telling the tales of Cegorach's close ally known as the Cosmic Serpent. As such, are known for using a wide array of jetbikes and skimmers, Harlequin vehicles being named after the Cosmic Serpent's spawn. Are very close to the Craftworld [[Saim-Hann]], supposedly because Saim-Hann's symbol is the Cosmic Serpent but really because both like to go fast.
*The Silent Shroud: A incredibly secretive masque that performs in complete silence. Not only do they not say a word, their weapons are muffled by technology and illusion, making battle against them disorientating and unnerving. As such, they specialize in stealth and terror tactics, like the Night Lords except specializing in the "bad LSD trip" form of horror instead of jumpscares and torture porn.
*The Dance Without End: This Masque specializes in performances that recount the deeds of Cegorach himself, and as such are believed to be the closest to the Laughing God of all his disciples. They were the first Masque to perform the dance representing the Fall of the Eldar. After all of this, they are also ''the'' Masque defending the webway and the Black Library more than any other, and if they dont know a path in the webway, no one does. Despite how this lore makes them sound really fucking important, don't have rules in 8th edition.
*The Shattered Mirage: Compared to The Frozen Stars, The Shattered Mirage believe the Eldar are totally fucked, performing dances that are extremely dark and fatalistic. Thanks to their outlook on life, their preferred tactics are to do as much damage as possible, with little regard for their own lives.
*The Twisted Path: These guys are known for letting their audience members into their plays, only to be spirited away by the Harlequins and never seen again. In battle, they often kidnap both enemies and allies as well as strike in the middle of warzones, sometimes leaving right before victory. They explain their actions with complex riddles and illogical analogies.
*The Reaper's Mirth: The most bloodthirsty of Masques, the Harlequins of The Reaper's Mirth see the battlefield as a canvas for their gory arts. Because of this, they have a larger proportion of Death Jester's among their ranks. They are known for committing atrocities like the [[Grimdark|Fountain of Crimson Tears, which was so horrible that an entire world had to be exterminatused.]] We can only guess what it was. Given stuff like that, it's doubtful the Craftworld or Exodite Eldar want anything to do with them. I mean, ''fuck'' that's Khornate if ever there was any.

== The Players ==
Each Harlequin Masques is made up of a cast of players, that perform the many complex and intricate dances that retell the history, and the many myths of the Eldar species, each performances is led by a troupe master. These Harlequins make up the bulk of each Masque, supported by the Skyweavers, Voidweavers and Starweavers they make up the supporting cast, that without which, no performance could happen.

Shadowseers and Death Jesters take up prominent positions within each Masque but they still take up the role of secondary characters behind the Star Performers, who play the roles of the most important characters in Eldar History. At most the Shadowseer will represent or personify fate while the Death Jester does the same for death. Each of the Eldar Pantheon has a dedicated Eldar taking up their place within the performance, though only two have been revealed so far:

* The [[Solitaire]] - who takes up the role of [[Slaanesh]]. Literally anyone else who attempts the role will go insane, and Solitaires typically do not stay with a particular troop permanently.
* The so called Harlequin King- Who take up the role of [[Cegorach]], the Laughing God itself; who even [[Lelith Hesperax]] doubts she could best. In lieu of the Harlequin King, a Troupe Master represents the Laughing God.
* Although not named, a new player has entered into the performance- who takes up the role of [[Ynnead]].

If GW ever wanted to expand the range on the table top, they could easily turn the Harlequins into a small elite army of powerful Characters, supported by the weaker regular players; who doesn't want too see the Harlequin version of Khaine or Isha?

== We're Our Own Army Now ==

7th edition saw Harlequins get to be their own Faction, with new models for all members of the troupe, plus new models and rules for the Solitaire and a new Eldar jetbike, the Skyweaver. There are also two new vehicles, the Starweaver (a transport) and the Voidweaver. In addition, Shadowseers got their own Psychic Discipline, Phantasmancy. Harlequins survived into 8th and became all sorts of more killy and speedy, and get to freely mingle with their Dark and Craftworld cousins thanks to sharing the Aeldari keyword. Let the show go on!

Now with our own [[Harlequin Masque Creation Tables|faction creation tables.]]

== See Also ==

*[[Harlequin Masque Creation Tables]]
*[[Warhammer 40,000/Tactics/Eldar Harlequins (9E)|Tactics on how to play them.]]

[[Category: Warhammer 40,000]]

[[Category: Xenos]]

[[Category: Eldar]]

[[Category: Harlequins]]

{{Harlequin}}

{{Eldar-Forces}}

{{WH40k-Factions}}

Pygmies (Warhammer Fantasy)

2021-01-31T04:33:09Z

2406:3400:20F:FFC0:91A4:8232:D3C0:65CB:

{{Fail}}
[[File:Pygmy models 4.jpg|thumb|right|300px|Even the Grogs must admit that some changes were for the better.]]

Oh, boy.

The genesis of [[Warhammer Fantasy]] is that of an excuse to sell overstocked [[Dungeons & Dragons]] models which evolved into its own setting under the guidance of number-crunchers who took and passed the early torches of modern tabletop gaming outside of the roleplaying medium as well as loremasters who combined their degrees in history with their love of then-contemporary fantasy like [[Tolkien]], [[Michael Moorcock]], and [[Conan the Barbarian]].
Also, they were all British.

Early Warhammer was wild and combined just about whatever the writers wanted, lacking a unified setting as it was just a cluster of ideas designed to inspire people to make their own continuity among each other.

One of these ideas wound up unfortunately being one of the only depictions of black or Latino peoples in the setting. Most of the game takes place in "dialed up to 11 largely for the sake of comedy" Renaissance eras, both early and late, although it also has [[Tomb Kings|bronze age]], [[Orcs_&_Goblins#Varieties|stone age]], and [[High Elves (Warhammer Fantasy)|magic douchebag Atlantis types]] mixed in for flavor. So of course having a large chunk of the game taking place in eastern or southern Africa isn't entirely fitting, but the game doesn't have a distinct zoomed-in focus as [[Ogre Kingdoms|Mongols]] and [[Lizardmen|Aztec scalies]] get a fair amount of spotlight as well.

This makes the presence of the Pygmies fairly embarrassing since they were a shockingly racist expy of Africans straight out of the colonial representation of the Congo (although to be fair, the highly parodical nature of many of the elements of Warhammer could indicate mockery of this concept rather than playing it straight).

Pygmies first appeared in the second edition of Warhammer (it is worth noting that Warhammer didn't even have a true complete setting until 3rd edition) in the [[Warhammer Battle Bestiary]] supplement in 1984. They had the same stats of ordinary humans barring one point less of Strength and Toughness, but their point cost was so low that they were arguably one of the best options in the entire game at the time since you could easily create a huge horde of them that can outmatch almost anything. They appeared in the 2e scenario [[The Magnificent Sven]] in which they had successfully defeated a [[Warriors Of Chaos|Norse]] (bear in mind this is before Chaos existed in Warhammer) warriors consisting of 120, and the 121st was the guest of honor (unironically, as in he was given choice cuts and as much beer as he wanted) at a feast where they had cooked his companions (and his amputated leg) before letting him go free. These Pygmies live in [[Lustria]], or at least the 2e prototype of it. The artwork was stereotypical, but not completely offensive. They looked like dark-skinned Dwarfs dressed in a combination of Aztec and Zulu styles.

For context, the term "Pygmy" first appears as an ancient Greek creature called the "Pygmaeus", a type of short human-like monster which the Greek poet Homer said came from the region we now know to be India. It also referred to the distance between the fist and elbow for the purpose of measuring clothes/armor. The term was (much) later used during the time period where European superpowers aggressively colonized the world in all directions (but north obviously), being applied to various societies that were still in the stone or bronze age which due to less nutritious diets were usually shorter than the explorers. The term is considered racist, but there's no real alternative word that's caught on in the mainstream so seemingly the rule is that any group who has enough internet access to complain about it can't be called Pygmies anymore, for everyone else its fair game. Although the term was applied to South American tribes, today it only refers to groups in Africa and southeastern Asia.

While that last bit could be theoretically used to excuse the concept since it wouldn't apply towards a real people, Citadel released models in 1985 by [[Alan and Michael Perry]] accompanied by artwork of the same minis in the Spring 1985 issue of [[Citadel Journal]]. This newly revised version of the Pygmies eschewed the defensible older artwork with the "Pickaninny" (or maybe "Gollywog" is a more fitting term, since GW came from the UK) style of highly exaggerated features. Who thought this was a good idea is unknown, particularly since not only were the models and artwork embarrassing but their status as a powerful faction with a supporting role in a major story was gone as well. While the visual style of the 3rd edition they were released for was to amp up the exaggeration in order to create unique models that stand out when viewed from a distance (as armies had gotten bigger in 3e) and to create a more signature style to help the Citadel brand, the rest of the models to get this treatment weren't based on ethnic stereotypes (at least since we stopped considering belligerent Irishmen a different race anyway).

Pygmies were only mentioned a handful of times after 1985. The first, and only major appearance, came as a timed scenario for [[Games Day Convention]] 1997 written by [[Basil Barrett]] which was published in the 100th issue of [[White Dwarf]]. The scenario, entitled "[[The Hanging Gardens Of Bab-Elonn]]", gives Pygmies a new origin as an alien race that arrived alongside the [[Old Ones]], also in giant floating pyramids from another dimension/outer space. The Pygmy culture devolved since then until now they were a stone age race of short cannibal humanoids who share Lustria with the [[Lizardmen|creations of the Old Ones]] who have similarly lost most (but not all) of the advanced super magic science they came to the world with. In the campaign, the Pygmy players explore one of the pyramids of their ancestors...which will blow up in 2 hours due to a self-destruct mechanism they accidentally triggered.

Since then Pygmies have only been mentioned very sparingly, once in the [[Blood Bowl]] comics as being the team that the Amazons beat (and ate) in order to qualify for the Old World tourney. While the other highly racist Warhammer race, [[Hobgoblins (Warhammer Fantasy)|Hobgoblins]], simply had the more overt tones dropped and continued to be active in canon, Pygmies are more or less a relic of neckLongbeard Warhammer.

Technically speaking they could be used today as they were never actually retconned thanks to surviving references, and their statline and use of blowguns as a main weapon pretty much makes them [[Lizardmen#Skinks|Skinks]]. Their models are not known for being particularly expensive on the secondary market unless buying a complete set, although their original packaging will increase the value substantially.

== Age Of Sigmar(?) ==

Due to increased non-white representation in Games Workshop's sequel to Warhammer Fantasy called [[Age of Sigmar]], some have joked that the Pygmies finally evolved (and managed to knock up some Dark <strike>Aelves</strike> Elves). This is obviously not canon in any way, not only because it would be a PR nightmare for Games Workshop but also because its canon that the only things in Lustria that survived the destruction of the Warhammer World were what the Slann loaded onto their ships.

That being said...its canon that the Slann have recreated Lustria as constructs of light magic in their realm, which they send on raids against the enemies of Order. While the Slann and their obsession with the designs of the Old Ones may not have considered the Amazons worth creating construct copies of (although for all we know they have already), the fact that in the most current canon the Pygmies predate the Slann might mean that they would see them as just a natural and intended part of the Warhammer World. So...maybe they do exist still? At any rate it would give Games Workshop the chance to make some humans/humanoids to sell in the South American styles without the baggage of the current design of the Pygmies.

== Gallery ==

<gallery>
File:Pygmy models 1.jpg
File:WH pygmies 1.jpg
File:WH pygmies 2.png
File:WH pygmies 3.png
File:WH pygmies 4.png
File:WH pygmies 5.png
File:WH pygmies 6.png
File:WH pygmies 7.png
File:WH pygmies 8.png
</gallery>

[[Category: Warhammer Fantasy]]

Pygmies (Warhammer Fantasy)

2021-01-31T04:31:57Z

2406:3400:20F:FFC0:91A4:8232:D3C0:65CB:

{{Fail}}
[[File:Pygmy models 4.jpg|thumb|right|300px|Even the Grogs must admit that some changes were for the better.]]

Oh, boy.

The genesis of [[Warhammer Fantasy]] is that of an excuse to sell overstocked [[Dungeons & Dragons]] models which evolved into its own setting under the guidance of number-crunchers who took and passed the early torches of modern tabletop gaming outside of the roleplaying medium as well as loremasters who combined their degrees in history with their love of then-contemporary fantasy like [[Tolkien]], [[Michael Moorcock]], and [[Conan the Barbarian]].
Also, they were all British.

Early Warhammer was wild and combined just about whatever the writers wanted, lacking a unified setting as it was just a cluster of ideas designed to inspire people to make their own continuity among each other.

One of these ideas wound up unfortunately being one of the only depictions of black or Latino peoples in the setting. Most of the game takes place in "dialed up to 11 largely for the sake of comedy" Renaissance eras, both early and late, although it also has [[Tomb Kings|bronze age]], [[Orcs_&_Goblins#Varieties|stone age]], and [[High Elves (Warhammer Fantasy)|magic douchebag Atlantis types]] mixed in for flavor. So of course having a large chunk of the game taking place in eastern or southern Africa isn't entirely fitting, but the game doesn't have a distinct zoomed-in focus as [[Ogre Kingdoms|Mongols]] and [[Lizardmen|Aztec scalies]] get a fair amount of spotlight as well.

This makes the presence of the Pygmies fairly embarrassing since they were a shockingly racist expy of Africans straight out of the colonial representation of the Congo (although to be fair, the highly parodical nature of many of the elements of Warhammer could indicate mockery of this concept rather than playing it straight).

Pygmies first appeared in the second edition of Warhammer (it is worth noting that Warhammer didn't even have a true complete setting until 3rd edition) in the [[Warhammer Battle Bestiary]] supplement in 1984. They had the same stats of ordinary humans barring one point less of Strength and Toughness, but their point cost was so low that they were arguably one of the best options in the entire game at the time since you could easily create a huge horde of them that can outmatch almost anything. They appeared in the 2e scenario [[The Magnificent Sven]] in which they had successfully defeated a [[Warriors Of Chaos|Norse]] (bear in mind this is before Chaos existed in Warhammer) warriors consisting of 120, and the 121st was the guest of honor (unironically, as in he was given choice cuts and as much beer as he wanted) at a feast where they had cooked his companions (and his amputated leg) before letting him go free. These Pygmies live in [[Lustria]], or at least the 2e prototype of it. The artwork was stereotypical, but not completely offensive. They looked like dark-skinned Dwarfs dressed in a combination of Aztec and Zulu styles.

For context, the term "Pygmy" first appears as an ancient Greek creature called the "Pygmaeus", a type of short human-like monster which the Greek poet Homer said came from the region we now know to be India. It also referred to the distance between the fist and elbow for the purpose of measuring clothes/armor. The term was (much) later used during the time period where European superpowers aggressively colonized the world in all directions (but north obviously), being applied to various societies that were still in the stone or bronze age which due to less nutritious diets were usually shorter than the explorers. The term is considered racist, but there's no real alternative word that's caught on in the mainstream so seemingly the rule is that any group who has enough internet access to complain about it can't be called Pygmies anymore, for everyone else its fair game. Although the term was applied to South American tribes, today it only refers to groups in Africa and southeastern Asia.

While that last bit could be theoretically used to excuse the concept since it wouldn't apply towards a real people, Citadel released models in 1985 by [[Alan and Michael Perry]] accompanied by artwork of the same minis in the Spring 1985 issue of [[Citadel Journal]]. This newly revised version of the Pygmies eschewed the defensible older artwork with the "Pickaninny" (or maybe "Gollywog" is the better term, since GW came from the UK) style of highly exaggerated features. Who thought this was a good idea is unknown, particularly since not only were the models and artwork embarrassing but their status as a powerful faction with a supporting role in a major story was gone as well. While the visual style of the 3rd edition they were released for was to amp up the exaggeration in order to create unique models that stand out when viewed from a distance (as armies had gotten bigger in 3e) and to create a more signature style to help the Citadel brand, the rest of the models to get this treatment weren't based on ethnic stereotypes (at least since we stopped considering belligerent Irishmen a different race anyway).

Pygmies were only mentioned a handful of times after 1985. The first, and only major appearance, came as a timed scenario for [[Games Day Convention]] 1997 written by [[Basil Barrett]] which was published in the 100th issue of [[White Dwarf]]. The scenario, entitled "[[The Hanging Gardens Of Bab-Elonn]]", gives Pygmies a new origin as an alien race that arrived alongside the [[Old Ones]], also in giant floating pyramids from another dimension/outer space. The Pygmy culture devolved since then until now they were a stone age race of short cannibal humanoids who share Lustria with the [[Lizardmen|creations of the Old Ones]] who have similarly lost most (but not all) of the advanced super magic science they came to the world with. In the campaign, the Pygmy players explore one of the pyramids of their ancestors...which will blow up in 2 hours due to a self-destruct mechanism they accidentally triggered.

Since then Pygmies have only been mentioned very sparingly, once in the [[Blood Bowl]] comics as being the team that the Amazons beat (and ate) in order to qualify for the Old World tourney. While the other highly racist Warhammer race, [[Hobgoblins (Warhammer Fantasy)|Hobgoblins]], simply had the more overt tones dropped and continued to be active in canon, Pygmies are more or less a relic of neckLongbeard Warhammer.

Technically speaking they could be used today as they were never actually retconned thanks to surviving references, and their statline and use of blowguns as a main weapon pretty much makes them [[Lizardmen#Skinks|Skinks]]. Their models are not known for being particularly expensive on the secondary market unless buying a complete set, although their original packaging will increase the value substantially.

== Age Of Sigmar(?) ==

Due to increased non-white representation in Games Workshop's sequel to Warhammer Fantasy called [[Age of Sigmar]], some have joked that the Pygmies finally evolved (and managed to knock up some Dark <strike>Aelves</strike> Elves). This is obviously not canon in any way, not only because it would be a PR nightmare for Games Workshop but also because its canon that the only things in Lustria that survived the destruction of the Warhammer World were what the Slann loaded onto their ships.

That being said...its canon that the Slann have recreated Lustria as constructs of light magic in their realm, which they send on raids against the enemies of Order. While the Slann and their obsession with the designs of the Old Ones may not have considered the Amazons worth creating construct copies of (although for all we know they have already), the fact that in the most current canon the Pygmies predate the Slann might mean that they would see them as just a natural and intended part of the Warhammer World. So...maybe they do exist still? At any rate it would give Games Workshop the chance to make some humans/humanoids to sell in the South American styles without the baggage of the current design of the Pygmies.

== Gallery ==

<gallery>
File:Pygmy models 1.jpg
File:WH pygmies 1.jpg
File:WH pygmies 2.png
File:WH pygmies 3.png
File:WH pygmies 4.png
File:WH pygmies 5.png
File:WH pygmies 6.png
File:WH pygmies 7.png
File:WH pygmies 8.png
</gallery>

[[Category: Warhammer Fantasy]]

Vikings

2021-01-31T03:58:59Z

2406:3400:20F:FFC0:91A4:8232:D3C0:65CB: /* Culture */

{{Topquote|It was not as if we'd stayed home and wasted our lives drinking wine with pretty girls.|A recurring motif in the Lay of Kraka}}
[[Image:VikingShip.jpg|500px|thumb|right|A Viking Longship, A thirty meter long can o' [[rape]] (literally) back in the day.]]
'''Vikings''' were Scandinavian people from the 8th to 11th century, a period in which societies based in Denmark, Norway and Sweden, making use of their long-ships set forth to trade and colonize areas including Northern France, the British Isles, Russia, Iceland, Greenland and even reached North America (though the settlements they set up there did not last). They also made a habit of bathing and washing their hands frequently, which at the time was unheard of among the peoples of Europe. Probably because they had to have about two dozen dudes on a small boat for a long time, so you would regularly bathe if you didn't want to be [[That Guy]]. They only stopped when France, of all countries, rolled a nat 20 on Diplomacy by offering Normandy to duke Rollo. One of his descendents by the name of William ended up with a claim to the throne of a place populated with Anglo-Saxons named Anglo-land (later known as England), and ultimately became its king.

Unlike popular belief, they did not wear horned helmets. This is for the practical reason that a big horned helmet might catch a sword unintentionally, which is all sorts of bad for the wearer; horned helmets were used on occasion, but only for ceremony. The ol' "horn-headed people eater" image was popularized during the 1800s.

As a final note "Viking" is not a noun, but a verb. Proper usage would be something like "Hey Olaf, I'm bored and need some spending money, want to go viking?" (The noun form would be ''víkingr'', a person who goes ''viking'').

==Culture==
Vikings believed that when they died in battle (preferably in a totally fuck-awesome way) they would go to a place called Valhalla to become one of the Einherjar (Chosen Slain) or to Fólkvangr (the realm controlled by Freyja, the Nordic goddess of love, prosperity, spring and being foxy as hell; also a death goddess and war goddess, which is why she gets half the chosen warriors in the first place), where they would chug booze, [[List of /tg/ Cuisine|eat all the meat and cheese they wanted]], and (if that actually managed to get dull) participate in massive murderfests only to be fully healed the next day and ready to do it all over again. On the other hand, if they died in bed or in a totally lame way (such as AIDs or cancer or... actually anywhere but battle is lame) they would instead go to a totally boring place called Hel where NOTHING FUCKING HAPPENED! '''EVER!''' (As you might imagine, this became problematic for many of their folk heroes who were just that fucking hard to kill). And if ''that'' weren't bad enough, people who committed what the vikings saw as the unforgivable sins, like oathbreaking, went to a prison overseen by the goddess of the dead. The ceiling is made from the bones of serpents, which drip burning venom, the halls are waist-deep in cold, slimy blood, and there is nothing to drink but goats piss and nothing to eat but rotten food (basically a Minnesota Vikings game, but one that never ends and the weather's always bad). The exception is if you died while giving birth, then you got go to Valhalla; the vikings were surprisingly fair for their day in their attitudes towards the sexes.

That said, there was the ''third'' way to die. Dying at sea was totally cool for the Vikings, for while the Battle-junkies went to Valhalla and Freya, and the lame ones went to Hel, the Sea-Bears went to the Halls of Aegir, god of the sea, where they got their own Watery Valhalla.

Vikings aren't known for being nice, [http://www.badassoftheweek.com/turgeis.html for a good reason]. During their raiding parties, they would kill, enslave and/or rape the non-Viking people they encountered. Afterwards the Vikings would [[Blood_Ravens#Bloody_Magpies|steal ''everything'' that wasn't nailed down.]] If it was nailed down, they'd try and steal the nails and if that didn't work, they'd ''burn'' it. If they couldn't burn it they'd ''''SMASH'''' it!

Later some of the smarter Viking warlords started to conquer shit rather than rape, pillage and kill everything in their sight. For quite a long time a large chunk of France and Italy, and the entirety of England and Russia were ruled by Vikings or their descendants, although they all got quickly assimilated into the nations they've conquered, to the point when they started to think of themselves as French/Russians in just a two or three generations after settling in. The Vikings also had a level of prestige in the Byzantine Empire, as they were the preferred recruits for the Emperor's bodyguard, the Varangian Guard.

=== [[Mythology#Norse Mythology|Norse Mythology]] ===
Like Greek mythology, the Norse have their own version of creation, different sets of gods, and heroic stories of manly feats. Here are some of them (Note that, much like Celtic mythology, Norse mythology was only written down long after Scandanavia had become Christian, so there remains a massive amount of missing stories (for example, while the war between the Vanir and the Aesir is mentioned, we don't actually have the full description of it, even though at one time it probably existed).

==In Modern Fiction==
Vikings and the honorable Neanderthals are some of the closest that the real world has ever had to [[dwarves]], but they should not be confused as such. While they had a penchant for [[axe]]s and could use anything, [[Dwarf Fortress|including body parts and broken furniture]], as a weapon, Vikings were just unspeakably awesome humans (they couldn't handle as much booze as a dwarf, though only just). Vikings that [[Toothless Dragon|rode Dragons]] even more so. Vikings are not to be confused with [[barbarian]]s either, despite any combination with the former resulting in awesome. [[Warriors of Chaos|Vikings are also notable for pledging themselves to Chaos]] and becoming [[Space Wolves|werewolf supersoldiers]].

The Vikings have also finally gotten their own TV show starring Vladimir Kullich. It is about the saga of Ragnar Lothbrok and his sons; Bjorn Ironside, Ivar the Boneless, Sigurd Snake-eye, Halfdan, Hvitserk, and Ubbe, as well as the tales of Duke Rollo of Normandy, King Harald Fairhair, and Alfred the Great of Wessex.

==Viking Longships==

The thing that put the Vikings on the map were their Longships (or LongBOAT if you're not [[skub|American]]). Basically these were large canoes made from planks with a mast to catch the wind. They could, however handle rough northern seas very well, and allowed some Vikings to reach such exotic locales as Newfoundland centuries before other Europeans. One thing that helped made the Longships such a gamechanger was that the vikings worked out that properly curing and drying out timbers it made it stronger and more resistant to being eaten at sea by nematodes and similar grody things.

Sometimes to save travel time, the Vikings would pull their Longships overland for kilometers. No joking, no hyperbole. A few tricks (like log rollers) helped, though. One of them (Oleg, the prince of Kievan Russ) even mounted his longships on wheels to quickly move them into Constantinople harbor, bypassing the defensive chain pulled across the path (which possibly inspired the Ottoman sultan Mehmed II when he used a similar trick to help him capture Constantinople).

Their Longships also had an [[derp|early warning system]] so that people could tell wether they were going to fuck them up or not. It's to do with the shields:
If the Shields were on the outside of their Longships, then they were coming to trade goods.
If the Shields were not on the outside of their Longships, then they were going to use them in battle, and you should run for the hills (if you get that far...)

==Viking Berserkers==
There's lot of bullshit about these guys on the internet and in general beliefs. Hell, the word itself had became the synonym of uncontrollable rage in many languages. The truth, however, is quite boring - berserkers (which comes from the Old Norse for "bear hide", as it was their signature piece of clothes they wore above armor, or sometimes instead of it) were equivalents of champions in the Norse culture with a pitch of warrior-priest flavor added - i.e. the guys who fought in duels on behalf of the tribe or some wealthy noble. And Norse culture had a fuckton of things settled with duels. As best of the best professional warriors among already brutally strong vikings they kicked all kinds of asses, and were rightfully feared for their skill and bravery. As you may guess, they where quite rare, so no "hordes" or even "squads" of berserkers for you - at best you'd have two or three per raid, and most often only one. As for uncontrollable rage... well, sagas mention a total of ZERO berserkers going into what we now call "[[Khorne|berserker]] rage" - there are mentions of jarls and ordinary warriors going to battle biting shields, foaming with mad anger and killing friend and foe alike, but never berserkers. WRONG:

{{topquote|-And as the foemen's ships drew near, The dreadful din you well might hear Savage berserks roaring mad, And champions fierce in wolf-skins clad, Howling like wolves; and clanking jar.|Harald Fairhair Saga ch 19.}}
Mushroom brew painkiller that allow to fight despite heavy or even fatal wounds likewise weren't their exclusive, although proper brew (that wouldn't ruin your liver, therefore sentencing you to a lame death in your bed if you survive the battle) was quite expensive, and berserkers, as pretty much second-in-command of jarls were among those wealthy enough to afford it.

==D&D==
{{dnd-stub}}

==Pathfinder==
Viking is a [[Fighter]] archetype from ''People of the North'', that was reprinted with small changes that buff it in ''Ultimate Wilderness''. In exchange for heavy armor, and weapon training it gives the ability to rage like a [[Barbarian]] and take rage powers in place of feats. It also replaces armor training with some bonuses to using a shield. It's not a ''terrible'' archetype, but suffers from the fact that rage+shield lacks synergy as a fighting style, weapon training being the source of most fighter support, and the question of "why don't you just play a Barbarian when you've given up everything that makes Fighter competitive with Barbarian?" having few good answers, so it winds up a suboptimal archetype.

==Pathfinder 2nd==
{{dnd-stub}}
An archetype that any class can take if you want to be a melee guy that knows some things about water. You learn how to best use a shield, not be slow by wet terrain, Run and throw things.

{{Pathfinder-2nd-Edition-Archetypes}}

==Gallery==
<center><gallery>
Image:Elspeth_and_Vikings.png|When [[Elspeth Tirel]] needs backup, these are the people she calls.
Image:WarbandViking.jpg| JEG SKALL DRIKKE FRA HODESKALLEN DIN!!!.
Image:Lego_Viking_ship.jpg|Pillaging colorful brick villages since 576 A.D.
</gallery></center>

==See Also==
* [[Pirate]]
*[[The Poetic Edda]]
[[Category:History]]

Vikings

2021-01-31T03:52:32Z

2406:3400:20F:FFC0:91A4:8232:D3C0:65CB: /* Culture */

{{Topquote|It was not as if we'd stayed home and wasted our lives drinking wine with pretty girls.|A recurring motif in the Lay of Kraka}}
[[Image:VikingShip.jpg|500px|thumb|right|A Viking Longship, A thirty meter long can o' [[rape]] (literally) back in the day.]]
'''Vikings''' were Scandinavian people from the 8th to 11th century, a period in which societies based in Denmark, Norway and Sweden, making use of their long-ships set forth to trade and colonize areas including Northern France, the British Isles, Russia, Iceland, Greenland and even reached North America (though the settlements they set up there did not last). They also made a habit of bathing and washing their hands frequently, which at the time was unheard of among the peoples of Europe. Probably because they had to have about two dozen dudes on a small boat for a long time, so you would regularly bathe if you didn't want to be [[That Guy]]. They only stopped when France, of all countries, rolled a nat 20 on Diplomacy by offering Normandy to duke Rollo. One of his descendents by the name of William ended up with a claim to the throne of a place populated with Anglo-Saxons named Anglo-land (later known as England), and ultimately became its king.

Unlike popular belief, they did not wear horned helmets. This is for the practical reason that a big horned helmet might catch a sword unintentionally, which is all sorts of bad for the wearer; horned helmets were used on occasion, but only for ceremony. The ol' "horn-headed people eater" image was popularized during the 1800s.

As a final note "Viking" is not a noun, but a verb. Proper usage would be something like "Hey Olaf, I'm bored and need some spending money, want to go viking?" (The noun form would be ''víkingr'', a person who goes ''viking'').

==Culture==
Vikings believed that when they died in battle (preferably in a totally fuck-awesome way) they would go to a place called Valhalla to become one of the Einherjar (Chosen Slain) or to Fólkvangr (the realm controlled by Freyja, the Nordic goddess of love, prosperity, spring and being foxy as hell; also a death goddess and war goddess, which is why she gets half the chosen warriors in the first place), where they would chug booze, [[List of /tg/ Cuisine|eat all the meat and cheese they wanted]], and (if that actually managed to get dull) participate in massive murderfests only to be fully healed the next day and ready to do it all over again. On the other hand, if they died in bed or in a totally lame way (such as AIDs or cancer or... actually anywhere but battle is lame) they would instead go to a totally boring place called Hel where NOTHING FUCKING HAPPENED! '''EVER!''' (As you might imagine, this became problematic for many of their folk heroes who were just that fucking hard to kill). And if ''that'' weren't bad enough, people who committed what the vikings saw as the unforgivable sins, like oathbreaking, went to a prison overseen by the goddess of the dead. The ceiling is made from the bones of serpents, which drip burning venom, the halls are waist-deep in cold, slimy blood, and there is nothing to drink but goats piss and nothing to eat but rotten food (basically a Minnesota Vikings game). The exception is if you died while giving birth, then you got go to Valhalla; the vikings were surprisingly fair for their day in their attitudes towards the sexes.

That said, there was the ''third'' way to die. Dying at sea was totally cool for the Vikings, for while the Battle-junkies went to Valhalla and Freya, and the lame ones went to Hel, the Sea-Bears went to the Halls of Aegir, god of the sea, where they got their own Watery Valhalla.

Vikings aren't known for being nice, [http://www.badassoftheweek.com/turgeis.html for a good reason]. During their raiding parties, after killing, enslaving and/or raping the non-Viking people they encountered, the Vikings would [[Blood_Ravens#Bloody_Magpies|they would steal ''anything'' that wasn't nailed down.]] If it was nailed down, they'd try and steal the nails and if that didn't work, they'd eat it. If they couldn't eat it, they'd ''burn'' it, and if they couldn't burn it they'd ''''SMASH'''' it!

Later some of the smarter Viking warlords started to conquer shit rather than rape, pillage and kill everything in their sight. For quite a long time a large chunk of France and Italy, and the entirety of England and Russia were ruled by Vikings or their descendants, although they all got quickly assimilated into the nations they've conquered, to the point when they started to think of themselves as French/Russians in just a two or three generations after settling in. The Vikings also had a level of prestige in the Byzantine Empire, as they were the preferred recruits for the Emperor's bodyguard, the Varangian Guard.

=== [[Mythology#Norse Mythology|Norse Mythology]] ===
Like Greek mythology, the Norse have their own version of creation, different sets of gods, and heroic stories of manly feats. Here are some of them (Note that, much like Celtic mythology, Norse mythology was only written down long after Scandanavia had become Christian, so there remains a massive amount of missing stories (for example, while the war between the Vanir and the Aesir is mentioned, we don't actually have the full description of it, even though at one time it probably existed).

==In Modern Fiction==
Vikings and the honorable Neanderthals are some of the closest that the real world has ever had to [[dwarves]], but they should not be confused as such. While they had a penchant for [[axe]]s and could use anything, [[Dwarf Fortress|including body parts and broken furniture]], as a weapon, Vikings were just unspeakably awesome humans (they couldn't handle as much booze as a dwarf, though only just). Vikings that [[Toothless Dragon|rode Dragons]] even more so. Vikings are not to be confused with [[barbarian]]s either, despite any combination with the former resulting in awesome. [[Warriors of Chaos|Vikings are also notable for pledging themselves to Chaos]] and becoming [[Space Wolves|werewolf supersoldiers]].

The Vikings have also finally gotten their own TV show starring Vladimir Kullich. It is about the saga of Ragnar Lothbrok and his sons; Bjorn Ironside, Ivar the Boneless, Sigurd Snake-eye, Halfdan, Hvitserk, and Ubbe, as well as the tales of Duke Rollo of Normandy, King Harald Fairhair, and Alfred the Great of Wessex.

==Viking Longships==

The thing that put the Vikings on the map were their Longships (or LongBOAT if you're not [[skub|American]]). Basically these were large canoes made from planks with a mast to catch the wind. They could, however handle rough northern seas very well, and allowed some Vikings to reach such exotic locales as Newfoundland centuries before other Europeans. One thing that helped made the Longships such a gamechanger was that the vikings worked out that properly curing and drying out timbers it made it stronger and more resistant to being eaten at sea by nematodes and similar grody things.

Sometimes to save travel time, the Vikings would pull their Longships overland for kilometers. No joking, no hyperbole. A few tricks (like log rollers) helped, though. One of them (Oleg, the prince of Kievan Russ) even mounted his longships on wheels to quickly move them into Constantinople harbor, bypassing the defensive chain pulled across the path (which possibly inspired the Ottoman sultan Mehmed II when he used a similar trick to help him capture Constantinople).

Their Longships also had an [[derp|early warning system]] so that people could tell wether they were going to fuck them up or not. It's to do with the shields:
If the Shields were on the outside of their Longships, then they were coming to trade goods.
If the Shields were not on the outside of their Longships, then they were going to use them in battle, and you should run for the hills (if you get that far...)

==Viking Berserkers==
There's lot of bullshit about these guys on the internet and in general beliefs. Hell, the word itself had became the synonym of uncontrollable rage in many languages. The truth, however, is quite boring - berserkers (which comes from the Old Norse for "bear hide", as it was their signature piece of clothes they wore above armor, or sometimes instead of it) were equivalents of champions in the Norse culture with a pitch of warrior-priest flavor added - i.e. the guys who fought in duels on behalf of the tribe or some wealthy noble. And Norse culture had a fuckton of things settled with duels. As best of the best professional warriors among already brutally strong vikings they kicked all kinds of asses, and were rightfully feared for their skill and bravery. As you may guess, they where quite rare, so no "hordes" or even "squads" of berserkers for you - at best you'd have two or three per raid, and most often only one. As for uncontrollable rage... well, sagas mention a total of ZERO berserkers going into what we now call "[[Khorne|berserker]] rage" - there are mentions of jarls and ordinary warriors going to battle biting shields, foaming with mad anger and killing friend and foe alike, but never berserkers. WRONG:

{{topquote|-And as the foemen's ships drew near, The dreadful din you well might hear Savage berserks roaring mad, And champions fierce in wolf-skins clad, Howling like wolves; and clanking jar.|Harald Fairhair Saga ch 19.}}
Mushroom brew painkiller that allow to fight despite heavy or even fatal wounds likewise weren't their exclusive, although proper brew (that wouldn't ruin your liver, therefore sentencing you to a lame death in your bed if you survive the battle) was quite expensive, and berserkers, as pretty much second-in-command of jarls were among those wealthy enough to afford it.

==D&D==
{{dnd-stub}}

==Pathfinder==
Viking is a [[Fighter]] archetype from ''People of the North'', that was reprinted with small changes that buff it in ''Ultimate Wilderness''. In exchange for heavy armor, and weapon training it gives the ability to rage like a [[Barbarian]] and take rage powers in place of feats. It also replaces armor training with some bonuses to using a shield. It's not a ''terrible'' archetype, but suffers from the fact that rage+shield lacks synergy as a fighting style, weapon training being the source of most fighter support, and the question of "why don't you just play a Barbarian when you've given up everything that makes Fighter competitive with Barbarian?" having few good answers, so it winds up a suboptimal archetype.

==Pathfinder 2nd==
{{dnd-stub}}
An archetype that any class can take if you want to be a melee guy that knows some things about water. You learn how to best use a shield, not be slow by wet terrain, Run and throw things.

{{Pathfinder-2nd-Edition-Archetypes}}

==Gallery==
<center><gallery>
Image:Elspeth_and_Vikings.png|When [[Elspeth Tirel]] needs backup, these are the people she calls.
Image:WarbandViking.jpg| JEG SKALL DRIKKE FRA HODESKALLEN DIN!!!.
Image:Lego_Viking_ship.jpg|Pillaging colorful brick villages since 576 A.D.
</gallery></center>

==See Also==
* [[Pirate]]
*[[The Poetic Edda]]
[[Category:History]]

Vikings

2021-01-31T03:48:48Z

2406:3400:20F:FFC0:91A4:8232:D3C0:65CB:

{{Topquote|It was not as if we'd stayed home and wasted our lives drinking wine with pretty girls.|A recurring motif in the Lay of Kraka}}
[[Image:VikingShip.jpg|500px|thumb|right|A Viking Longship, A thirty meter long can o' [[rape]] (literally) back in the day.]]
'''Vikings''' were Scandinavian people from the 8th to 11th century, a period in which societies based in Denmark, Norway and Sweden, making use of their long-ships set forth to trade and colonize areas including Northern France, the British Isles, Russia, Iceland, Greenland and even reached North America (though the settlements they set up there did not last). They also made a habit of bathing and washing their hands frequently, which at the time was unheard of among the peoples of Europe. Probably because they had to have about two dozen dudes on a small boat for a long time, so you would regularly bathe if you didn't want to be [[That Guy]]. They only stopped when France, of all countries, rolled a nat 20 on Diplomacy by offering Normandy to duke Rollo. One of his descendents by the name of William ended up with a claim to the throne of a place populated with Anglo-Saxons named Anglo-land (later known as England), and ultimately became its king.

Unlike popular belief, they did not wear horned helmets. This is for the practical reason that a big horned helmet might catch a sword unintentionally, which is all sorts of bad for the wearer; horned helmets were used on occasion, but only for ceremony. The ol' "horn-headed people eater" image was popularized during the 1800s.

As a final note "Viking" is not a noun, but a verb. Proper usage would be something like "Hey Olaf, I'm bored and need some spending money, want to go viking?" (The noun form would be ''víkingr'', a person who goes ''viking'').

==Culture==
Vikings believed that when they died in battle (preferably in a totally fuck-awesome way) they would go to a place called Valhalla to become one of the Einherjar (Chosen Slain) or to Fólkvangr (the realm controlled by Freyja, the Nordic goddess of love, prosperity, spring and being foxy as hell; also a death goddess and war goddess, which is why she gets half the chosen warriors in the first place), where they would chug booze, [[List of /tg/ Cuisine|eat all the meat and cheese they wanted]], and (if that actually managed to get dull) participate in massive murderfests only to be fully healed the next day and ready to do it all over again. On the other hand, if they died in bed or in a totally lame way (such as AIDs or cancer or... actually anywhere but battle is lame) they would instead go to a totally boring place called Hel where NOTHING FUCKING HAPPENED! '''EVER!''' (As you might imagine, this became problematic for many of their folk heroes who were just that fucking hard to kill). And if ''that'' weren't bad enough, people who committed what the vikings saw as the unforgivable sins, like oathbreaking, went to a prison overseen by the goddess of the dead. The ceiling is made from the bones of serpents, which drip burning venom, the halls are waist-deep in cold, slimy blood, and there is nothing to drink but goats piss and nothing to eat but rotten food (basically a Minnesota Vikings game). The exception is if you died while giving birth, then you got go to Valhalla; the vikings were surprisingly egalitarian in their attitudes towards the sexes.

That said, there was the ''third'' way to die. Dying at sea was totally cool for the Vikings, for while the Battle-junkies went to Valhalla and Freya, and the lame ones went to Hel,
the Sea-Bears went to the Halls of Aegir, god of the sea, where they got their own Watery Valhalla.

Vikings aren't known for being nice, [http://www.badassoftheweek.com/turgeis.html for a good reason]. During their raiding parties, after killing, enslaving and/or raping the non-Viking people they encountered, the Vikings would [[Blood_Ravens#Bloody_Magpies|they would steal ''anything'' that wasn't nailed down.]] If it was nailed down, they'd try and steal the nails and if that didn't work, they'd eat it. If they couldn't eat it, they'd ''burn'' it, and if they couldn't burn it they'd ''''SMASH'''' it!

Later some of the smarter Viking warlords started to conquer shit rather than rape, pillage and kill everything in their sight. For quite a long time a large chunk of France and Italy, and the entirety of England and Russia were ruled by Vikings or their descendants, although they all got quickly assimilated into the nations they've conquered, to the point when they started to think of themselves as French/Russians in just a two or three generations after settling in. The Vikings also had a level of prestige in the Byzantine Empire, as they were the preferred recruits for the Emperor's bodyguard, the Varangian Guard.

=== [[Mythology#Norse Mythology|Norse Mythology]] ===
Like Greek mythology, the Norse have their own version of creation, different sets of gods, and heroic stories of manly feats. Here are some of them (Note that, much like Celtic mythology, Norse mythology was only written down long after Scandanavia had become Christian, so there remains a massive amount of missing stories (for example, while the war between the Vanir and the Aesir is mentioned, we don't actually have the full description of it, even though at one time it probably existed).

==In Modern Fiction==
Vikings and the honorable Neanderthals are some of the closest that the real world has ever had to [[dwarves]], but they should not be confused as such. While they had a penchant for [[axe]]s and could use anything, [[Dwarf Fortress|including body parts and broken furniture]], as a weapon, Vikings were just unspeakably awesome humans (they couldn't handle as much booze as a dwarf, though only just). Vikings that [[Toothless Dragon|rode Dragons]] even more so. Vikings are not to be confused with [[barbarian]]s either, despite any combination with the former resulting in awesome. [[Warriors of Chaos|Vikings are also notable for pledging themselves to Chaos]] and becoming [[Space Wolves|werewolf supersoldiers]].

The Vikings have also finally gotten their own TV show starring Vladimir Kullich. It is about the saga of Ragnar Lothbrok and his sons; Bjorn Ironside, Ivar the Boneless, Sigurd Snake-eye, Halfdan, Hvitserk, and Ubbe, as well as the tales of Duke Rollo of Normandy, King Harald Fairhair, and Alfred the Great of Wessex.

==Viking Longships==

The thing that put the Vikings on the map were their Longships (or LongBOAT if you're not [[skub|American]]). Basically these were large canoes made from planks with a mast to catch the wind. They could, however handle rough northern seas very well, and allowed some Vikings to reach such exotic locales as Newfoundland centuries before other Europeans. One thing that helped made the Longships such a gamechanger was that the vikings worked out that properly curing and drying out timbers it made it stronger and more resistant to being eaten at sea by nematodes and similar grody things.

Sometimes to save travel time, the Vikings would pull their Longships overland for kilometers. No joking, no hyperbole. A few tricks (like log rollers) helped, though. One of them (Oleg, the prince of Kievan Russ) even mounted his longships on wheels to quickly move them into Constantinople harbor, bypassing the defensive chain pulled across the path (which possibly inspired the Ottoman sultan Mehmed II when he used a similar trick to help him capture Constantinople).

Their Longships also had an [[derp|early warning system]] so that people could tell wether they were going to fuck them up or not. It's to do with the shields:
If the Shields were on the outside of their Longships, then they were coming to trade goods.
If the Shields were not on the outside of their Longships, then they were going to use them in battle, and you should run for the hills (if you get that far...)

==Viking Berserkers==
There's lot of bullshit about these guys on the internet and in general beliefs. Hell, the word itself had became the synonym of uncontrollable rage in many languages. The truth, however, is quite boring - berserkers (which comes from the Old Norse for "bear hide", as it was their signature piece of clothes they wore above armor, or sometimes instead of it) were equivalents of champions in the Norse culture with a pitch of warrior-priest flavor added - i.e. the guys who fought in duels on behalf of the tribe or some wealthy noble. And Norse culture had a fuckton of things settled with duels. As best of the best professional warriors among already brutally strong vikings they kicked all kinds of asses, and were rightfully feared for their skill and bravery. As you may guess, they where quite rare, so no "hordes" or even "squads" of berserkers for you - at best you'd have two or three per raid, and most often only one. As for uncontrollable rage... well, sagas mention a total of ZERO berserkers going into what we now call "[[Khorne|berserker]] rage" - there are mentions of jarls and ordinary warriors going to battle biting shields, foaming with mad anger and killing friend and foe alike, but never berserkers. WRONG:

{{topquote|-And as the foemen's ships drew near, The dreadful din you well might hear Savage berserks roaring mad, And champions fierce in wolf-skins clad, Howling like wolves; and clanking jar.|Harald Fairhair Saga ch 19.}}
Mushroom brew painkiller that allow to fight despite heavy or even fatal wounds likewise weren't their exclusive, although proper brew (that wouldn't ruin your liver, therefore sentencing you to a lame death in your bed if you survive the battle) was quite expensive, and berserkers, as pretty much second-in-command of jarls were among those wealthy enough to afford it.

==D&D==
{{dnd-stub}}

==Pathfinder==
Viking is a [[Fighter]] archetype from ''People of the North'', that was reprinted with small changes that buff it in ''Ultimate Wilderness''. In exchange for heavy armor, and weapon training it gives the ability to rage like a [[Barbarian]] and take rage powers in place of feats. It also replaces armor training with some bonuses to using a shield. It's not a ''terrible'' archetype, but suffers from the fact that rage+shield lacks synergy as a fighting style, weapon training being the source of most fighter support, and the question of "why don't you just play a Barbarian when you've given up everything that makes Fighter competitive with Barbarian?" having few good answers, so it winds up a suboptimal archetype.

==Pathfinder 2nd==
{{dnd-stub}}
An archetype that any class can take if you want to be a melee guy that knows some things about water. You learn how to best use a shield, not be slow by wet terrain, Run and throw things.

{{Pathfinder-2nd-Edition-Archetypes}}

==Gallery==
<center><gallery>
Image:Elspeth_and_Vikings.png|When [[Elspeth Tirel]] needs backup, these are the people she calls.
Image:WarbandViking.jpg| JEG SKALL DRIKKE FRA HODESKALLEN DIN!!!.
Image:Lego_Viking_ship.jpg|Pillaging colorful brick villages since 576 A.D.
</gallery></center>

==See Also==
* [[Pirate]]
*[[The Poetic Edda]]
[[Category:History]]

Lukas the Trickster

2021-01-31T03:47:24Z

2406:3400:20F:FFC0:91A4:8232:D3C0:65CB:

[[File:Lukas the Trickster2.jpg|350px|thumbnail|right|Space Marines that are versed in the art of [[Troll|Trolling]] exist, and Lukas is the Godfather of them all.]]
In a chapter known for its rebellious streak and tendency to stick a middle finger up at larger [[Imperial]] authority to get shit done, Lukas the Trickster of the [[Space Wolves]] (also called the Strifeson, the Laughing One, the Jackalwolf, and That Enormous Prick; the last by both enemies and lovers) stands out for his legendary example of these...traits. He is despised by half the Wolf Lords for his constant mooning them during council meetings but does he care? Nah, he sees it all as part of the fun. He has never made it out of the Blood Claw packs due to his perceived immaturity but there is no denying his skills are far beyond most Wolf Guards and then some.

He also has renown as a serial shagger amongst the womenfolk of [[Fenris]] with the stamina of a herd of stallions; on one famed occasion, he famously once slept with a dozen women in one night. That might sound stupid, but Space Wolves recruit them relatively old, Fenris could be like some of Earth's historical societies where a boy became a man at age 13 (thus being able to start having sex then, if not slightly earlier) and the Space Wolves are famous for not becoming asexual with multiple Space Wolf characters still displaying sexual attraction to various women, so this could have happened at anytime. In the novel with his name, Lukas stated he also has tons of illegitimate children or other assorted descendants (one of the female characters who has his hair and eyes is all but stated to be one of his descendants) and he secretly goes around looking after his bastard children when he's not doing Space Marine stuff (that's surprisingly responsible and manly of him) with the implication he still sleeps around. It's also worth remembering that it is never stated that the Astartes are sterile (though GW flip-flops about whether or not Space Marines have their genitals removed) they're just conditioned to ignore sexual impulses as distractions, but the Space Wolves don't seem to do it because they consider getting laid a lot to be a sign of manly warrior strength to boast and laugh about at the mess hall. Keep in mind that Space Marines technically aren't genetically modified. They are filled with growth hormones of various kinds (probably mostly ones that don't occur naturally in addition to testosterone) to make them big, biological and artificial implants are stuck in them and various body parts are replaced (eyes and ears for instance) and the progenoid manages these implants and ensures the body does not reject them (usually). But, growth hormone treatment is not genetic alteration. They're still normal humans with extra stuff added to them, so they would still be able to have perfectly normal human children provided they still had dicks. In fact, they'd probably be very virile.

The only reason Logan Grimnar has not exiled him from the Chapter is because he recognizes that Lukas represents the rebellious nature of the Wolves and because for all of his antics Lukas is loyal to the organization itself, still gets the job done and gets it done well. Also, the other half of the Wolf Lords think he's hilarious.

Since his induction he has shown his penchant for playing 'tricks' on others, although his victims are in little agreement over the humor of it. He locked an [[Inquisitor]]ial Delegation in a grox breeding pen while the creatures were in heat (saucy) and spiked the drink of the Wolf Lord Hrothgar with some bloat-toad venom. These acts have led him to gain something of a cult following amongst the Blood Claws, as big an asshole as he is. Currently he is attached to [[Ragnar Blackmane]]'s company, that being the only group of hot headed idiots capable of stomaching the crazy lout. It helps that Blackmane, who is still a Bloodclaw at heart, is one of the Wolf Lords who thinks Lukas is hilarious, to the point where he stopped Wolf Lord Bjorn Stormwolf from beating him to death for filling his Terminator Armour with bloodlice, making him itch uncontrollably.

When he turns his tricks on the Imperium's enemies however they produce stunning results (perhaps the only reason the hostile half of the Wolf Lords have never kicked him out of the nearest airlock; that and a belief that if they tried, then he'd somehow be the one in the ship and they'd be spacing themselves). He caused an [[Ork]] civil war with a series of faked transmissions; used a necrovirus on the cell of [[Dark Mechanicus|traitor Mechanicus]] adepts that made it in the first place; and caused a bunch of [[Word Bearers]] to land on thin ice, resulting in hundreds of traitor marine deaths, including the [[Chaos Lord]] (that alone would make any battle brother go down in history for grand efforts of trolling and earn a gold star from the Emperor).

His second finest dick move was using ancient tech to good effect during an Ork Waaagh. As the creatures attempted to conquer a planet, Lukas flicked the climate controls from 'normal' to 'chill motha' fuckas!'. When the great company arrived in force they found the orks were little more than ice statues and the temperature a pleasant reminder of home to them. This is also a terrifying example of how ridiculously advanced Dark Age humanity was.

Lukas was only beaten once and by the mad [[Dark Eldar]] corsair [[Duke Sliscus]], who removed Lukas' secondary heart as a parting gift and kicked him out an airlock (which the Wolf Lords had wet dreams about; if it wasn't for the fact that Sliscus was a mood-swinging Dark Eldar, you'd think he and Lukas would bond over their mutual rebellious streak and rampant philandering). Lukas though just laughed about it afterwards and had a stasis bomb put in place of his second heart. Should his primary heart every stop beating then....he will end up having the last laugh on his killer who will be frozen forever in his dying moment of glory.

Recently, Lukas made his finest dick move to date: tricking [[Magnus the Red]] while looking him in the eye. He accompanied [[Njal Stormcaller]] and [[Arjac Rockfist]] to Prospero to rescue some Space Wolf legionaires trapped inside a man-made Webway since the Razing. Magnus caught him and at first threatened him, then tempted him to give up a Rune of Unlocking that would allow his complete take-over of said man-made Webway and use of it to empower him in real space. Lukas gave the thing up, only to reveal that he had never had the aforementioned Rune in hand before being spirited away.

Also, it was revealed that Lukas is secretly afraid of the Wulfen curse.

==On the Tabletop==
Lukas is a Blood Claw with the stat block of a Wolf Guard Battle Leader, the only difference being his Leadership of eight, which any accompanied Blood Claw squad (and he can only join Blood Claws) will be forced to use. Many of the issues with that can easily be averted by adding a Wolf Priest to watch over them, which can be quite viable considering they are a close combat unit.

===7th Edition===
{| class=wikitable
! || Pts || WS || BS || S || T || W || I || A || Ld || Sv
|-
| '''Lukas the Trickster:''' || 80 || 5 || 5 || 4 || 4 || 2 || 5 || 3 || 8 || 3+
|}

Lukas has Acute senses and ATSKNF as he should, plus Counterattack and Independent Character. His special rules are Blood Claws Hero (only blood claws put up with his bullshit), Rebellious (forces his bloodclaw unit to use his leadership of 8 at all times, '''NEVER''' higher) and his famous Last Laugh which stasis bombs an enemy that kills Lukas in a challenge if you beat them on a D6 rolloff. Gear wise Lukas comes with a wolfclaw and a plasma pistol, power armor, and frag and krak grenades.

Note that this Last Laugh, his trademark, was once the bane of Titans everywhere, as he could single-handedly remove any Titan that accidentally stepped on him. As of 7E, it's now been knocked down to just being in challenges and even then if the Player beats the other guy in a roll-off. Yeah, kind of a weak laugh.

===8th Edition===
{| class=wikitable
! || Pts || WS || BS || S || T || W || A || Ld || Sv
|-
| '''Lukas the Trickster:''' || 80 || 2+ || 3+ || 4 || 4 || 4 || 4 || 8 || 3+
|}

Lukas has ATSKNF as he should, plus the CHARACTER and BLOOD CLAW keywords as he should. His special rules are Blood Claws Hero (only blood claws put up with his bullshit and re-roll wound rolls of 1 within 6 inches of him), Master of Mischief (subtracts 1 to the Leadership of ANY unit within 3 inches of him, yes it does include allied units), The Pelt of the Doppepangrel (subracts 1 to any hit rolls mae against him in close combat) and his famous Last Laugh which stasis bombs an enemy that kills Lukas if you beat them on a D6 rolloff and suffers D6 mortal wounds. Gear wise Lukas comes with a wolfclaw and a plasma pistol, power armor, and frag and krak grenades.

As of 8E, his Last Laugh has now been changed so it only works if he's killed in close combat and even then only if the Player beats the other guy in a roll-off. Yeah, still kind of a weak laugh.

==Trivia==
Lukas is obviously based on the Norse God Loki, the God of Trickery and a good move in the right direction; less furry and more VIKINGS in space please, GW.

{{Marines-Characters}}

[[Category:Space Wolves]]

Lady Malys

2021-01-31T03:29:24Z

2406:3400:20F:FFC0:91A4:8232:D3C0:65CB: /* The Panacea Incident */

[[File:Ladymalys1.jpeg|thumb|right|300px|You only wish your archon is as hot as her. This model was converted (very well) from the old Isabella von Carstein. As much we'd like it to be this one, there is no canon model (or image) of Lady Malys.]]

Amongst the [[Dark Eldar]], there is one that reigns supreme; [[Asdrubael Vect]], lord of the [[Kabal of the Black Heart]]. He is the most cunning Dark Eldar to have lived and takes pleasure in reducing would be usurpers to warp hound chow. Once chief amongst his underlings was the '''Lady Aurelia Malys''', who was his consort and displayed remarkable intelligence. For a while she was one of the prominent members of his inner circle and displayed her talents during the Panacea wars (see section below).

Vect grew bored of her after a couple of centuries (and maybe partially out of fear of her ambition) and kicked Malys out of her court. A woman scorned, Malys and her followers left [[Commorragh]] into another expanse of the [[Webway]] to get her hell-no-hathing fury on. There in the depths of the Webway she met [[Cegorach]], who banished her followers and challenged Malys to a game of wills, the loser of which would give their heart to the winner. Malys was victorious and the glowing being vanished, leaving a blade and its crystal heart. Then, in a turn of events that was completely sensible, she used the blade to remove her own heart and place the crystal one inside herself, because, you know, crystal works just as well as flesh with blood. (We're talking about the unrelentingly weird world of 40k here; she could have stuck a muffin in there and it probably would have worked.)

From there she returned to Commorragh with revenge in mind against Vect and began to build up her power, until she became the Archon of the Kabal of the Poisoned Tongue and one of the most powerful rulers in the Dark City.

Her keen mind is truly a byzantine labyrinth, hatching countless plots and always preparing to take advantage of a situation. She is described as polite, aloft and haughty, which only matches the image we have of her as one of those Victorian English ladies or anime noblewoman villainesses with an annoying laugh hidden behind a razor fan, unflattering polite while she plans how best to serve your brains on a platter at the next dinner party. She has matched wits with Asdrubael countless times and has an incredible sense of precognition. She may indeed in time be the one to finally dethrone Vect himself…

It is claimed in rumours that she can often be heard laughing hysterically from her private quarters. Strange, glowing being found in the Webway that didn't try to nom nom an Eldar… hysterical laughter… powers of precognition… yeah, this has [[Cegorach]] written all over it. The release of Codex: Harlequins confirms it; the Veiled Path takes credit for the encounter, though it is vague as to why.

==The Panacea Incident==
Malys was desperate to become the first female member of the [[Troll|League of Extraordinary Dickery]]; at the time, membership included the [[Emperor]], [[Tzeentch]], [[The Deceiver]], [[Cegorach]], [[Asdrubael Vect|Vect]] (now opposing Malys' membership), and [[Eldrad]]. Her admission entry into the league was her actions during the Panacea wars. Vect, desiring to weaken the lesser kabals, gave them the challenge to poison the entire [[Imperium]] and bringing him proof of the deed. Malys, discovering that the Imperium had recovered a precious STC, knew this was the perfect chance. She made it so that a large fleet of [[Ork]] Roks crash-landed into the Imperial forge world where the [[STC]] had been found. After a brief setback when an Ork Mekboy stole the STC first, Malys and her bodyguard waltzed through the orks vs humans bloodbath and plucked the STC off a dead Ork Mekboy’s hands with a flourish and a kiss. Vect was highly pleased with this textbook example of evil and after that Malys enjoyed increased influence in the dark city.

Why did stealing this particular artifact qualify? The STC, called the Panacea [[Noblebright|(which could basically cure every disease, ever)]], was one that could have saved countless billions of human lives through miraculous medical technologies and seriously given Nurgle a run for his money. Malys knew fully well what the STC could have done, but [[Grimdark|she keeps it locked away in her private gallery, a potent discovery that will forever be kept out of the Imperials’ hands and which gives Malys enormous satisfaction, knowing she is causing lots of suffering.]] The league is currently assessing such an entry for full membership. Most Dark Eldar were tickled senseless by the whole thing and Malys' smash and grab was a favorite topic among the various rumor mills and gossipmongers of Comorragh and a major feather in the cap of her Kabal. A few with long term perspectives might not like how this takes a weapon against Nurgle off the table, but most Dark Eldar are too selfish and hedonistic to care much about any long-term consequences of their pleasures.

Oh and to weaken some other Orks she was fighting another time, she developed a powerful chemical agent that works on their reproductive cycle and let it loose through a couple of Ork-held planets. Again, this was done for giggles. Also, the fluff mentioned it was with help from the [[Lhamaean]]s (an all-female sect of Dark Eldar courtesans/poison experts) in her entourage, implying that Malys is bisexual since these ladies are renowned for being high-class, nobility-exclusive prostitutes.

The 7E Haemonculus Coven supplement, while having Malys removed from play like most other named characters, does at least mention this spectacular tool as a new artefact for the Haemonculi. Apparently, one of the flesh-makers found out Malys had this tool and instantly lusted for it like he was an Omnissiah Techpriest. While she didn't let him have it, the guy was still more than willing to reverse-engineer it so that it could be useful. What resulted was the Panacea Perverted, a tool that gives a massive boost to IWND as well as forcing all poisoned weapons to wound on a 6+. That latter bit comes extremely useful for other Dark Eldar, Nids, or Nurgle, who get all the poisoned stuff.

==Current Status==
Like everything else without a model, Malys is no longer playable on the tabletop. In spite of this (or possibly because of this, if you consider GW's possible fluff reasoning for making Vect not playable either), her fluff role has expanded and she's now basically Vect's distaff counterpart. Commorragh has entered its own "End Times" of a sort as she and Vect fight an internal, out-and-out-street war in the city over a warp gate that threatens to break, [[fail|neither of them wanting it to open]] [[grimdark|but mistakenly believing the other one does.]] Why any Dark Eldar would try to unplug the cork in the anus of Commorragh remains a mystery.

During the events of the Gathering Storm, and the Great Dysjunction which threatened to destroy Commorragh, Lady Malys took advantage of the Daemon Invasion to rally more factions to her side, laying the blame for the invasion on Asdrubael, particularly on his inability to contain or manage the threat. This, of course, makes it more difficult for either faction to deal with the invasion.

Although the invasion was ultimately dealt with thanks to the [[Mandrakes]] and [[Haemonculi]], Malys' position has increased in strength, particularly as a result of Asdrubael's own faltering support base. Interestingly Malys had been a patron of [[Yvraine]], indicating that perhaps the Harlequins required, or do still require, something from Malys with regards to the Opener of the Seventh Way.

Despite her calls for Vect to be overthrown, when Asdrubael Vect was murdered by Mandrakes, Malys and her kabal went to ground rather than celebrate or make a move to claim power. She figured that his allies would come after her no matter what, but whether she actually had anything to do with Vect's death was anyone's guess. Neither was she present at Vect's wake, where the other Archons were killed and Vect was resurrected. For the time being, Malys decided to keep their distance and watch, with the only person her Kabal who knew her plans being Malys herself.

==Trivia==
While the name Malys is an obvious pun on "malice", it may also be a reference to the French name Maëlys, a feminization of the Breton name ''Mael'' ("prince"). With Aurelia meaning "Golden One" in Latin, Aurelia Malys could be translated as "Golden Princess", a fitting name for the haughty and disdainful archon don't you think?

It could also be a pun on Malaise (pronounced almost exactly like her name), a general feeling of discomfort, illness, or lack of well-being. Seeing as how she is known for stealing the Panacea, that would also fit quite well.

{{Dark Eldar-Characters}}