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Stupid Alignments

2020-10-24T04:51:35Z

2600:1700:19C0:2760:9585:A204:181C:FCEB: Created page with "In the universe of tabletop games, there are the alignments - systems to determine the moral leanings of the characters within each world, if applicable. Most will recognize t..."

In the universe of tabletop games, there are the alignments - systems to determine the moral leanings of the characters within each world, if applicable. Most will recognize the "standard" axes of Good-to-Evil and Lawful-to-Chaotic, with what each of these scales entail and an idea of where certain actions fall on this chart. The purpose of alignment is to guide and inform the direction of a player's character with regards to personality and behavior.

...And then there's [[Derp|doing]] [[Skub|it]] [[RAGE|wrong]].

Behold, the '''Stupid Alignments''': the result of what happens when players either don't understand the role they've chosen or else try to play into it too hard.

We won't go TOO in-depth on them, of course, since each of them already HAVE their own articles. We WILL, however, give links to those articles along with a short sweet summary of each concept.

==List of 'Stupid' Alignments==
*[[Chaotic Stupid]] - Pretty much the worst, most obnoxious do-what-I-want-because-I-can flavors of 'lolrandom' you can imagine, with no sense of basic pragmatism or even self-preservation.

*[[Stupid Evil]] - Pretty much the worst, most obnoxious do-what-I-want-because-it's-Evil™ flavors of-- wait a minute... Tends to treat villainy as a glorified checklist.

*[[Stupid Neutral]] - When a player thinks [[Meme|there's actually zero difference between good & bad things]], or else treats morality as some sort of binary scale to be "balanced".

*[[Stupid Good]] - These Boy Scouts never refuse the chance to do a good deed (or [[Detect Evil|what they ''think'']] [[The Orc Baby Dilemma|constitutes a good deed]]) even if it kills them - or someone else.

*[[Lawful Stupid]] - Yeah, yeah, [[Judge Dredd|we already know who you're quoting.]] Peace through warfare, honor before reason, and law before all else, no matter how inane or counterproductive.

Lawful Stupid

2020-10-24T04:37:02Z

2600:1700:19C0:2760:9585:A204:181C:FCEB: /* How to avoid it while playing Lawful Good */

{{fail}}
[[File:Obligatum VII.jpg|300px|thumb|right|[[Inevitable|Obligatum]] [[Elder Evils#Pandorym|VII]], the posterboy of Lawful Stupid.]]
{{Topquote|You wear your honor like a suit of armor, Stark. You think it keeps you safe, but all it does is weigh you down and make it hard for you to move.|[[A Song of Ice and Fire|Lord Petyr "Littlefinger" Baelish to Lord Eddard Stark.]]}}

'''Lawful Stupid''' is gamer slang (derived from the [[Dungeons & Dragons]] [[alignment]] system, but can easily be applied to [[character]]s in any [[role-playing game]] as well as fiction in general) for a specific way of playing a [[Lawful Good]] or, especially, a [[Lawful Neutral]] character, most infamously a [[Paladin]]. It is characterized by lack of common sense, following the rules arbitrarily without actually understanding them and just generally being an annoying prick. He's [[that guy]] who will stop a chase scene because he has to chastise someone that was jaywalking. Lawful Stupid players are one of the main reasons (along with asshole [[DM]]s) why people dislike the Paladin class. It can also be a jab at the fact that Intelligence is a common [[dump stat]] for Paladins in 3.5, since their [[MAD]] mandates high Charisma and Wisdom, the traditional dump stats of combat classes. [[Pathfinder]] allows them to dump Wisdom, the only class that can really do so, making this even worse.

Although the iconic Lawful Stupid character is a poorly-played Paladin (Alignment requirement: Lawful Good), non-Paladin depictions are almost invariably [[Lawful Neutral]], since this kind of characterization is a disappointingly logical extrapolation from a character alignment that can be summed up as "[[Judge Dredd|the Law is the Law and all that matters is that it is the law;]] [[Derp|whether or not it helps or hurts people is irrelevant, the LAW must be upheld!]]"

A lot of this really stems from a surface understanding of the Lawful alignment. While following the law is a lawful act, following the rules is not the end-all definition of the Lawful alignment. Lawful means orderly. So the type of person who religiously organizes their sock drawer would be considered Lawful. A Lawful person can disagree with the laws of the land, wanting to replace them with new laws. It's the desire for order and logic that matters. Of course these would be sensible Lawful people, and therefor not "Lawful Stupid".

Compare to [[Chaotic Stupid]], [[Stupid Evil]], [[Stupid Good]], and [[Stupid Neutral]]. There really are a lot of ways to be stupid in fantasy games, aren't there?

== How to avoid it while playing Lawful Good ==
The [[Discworld]] series by Terry Pratchett, in particular any scenes with the Witches of Lancre or the Ankh Morpork City Watch, are all but required reading for understand Granny Weatherwax, Sam Vimes, and Carrot Ironfoundersson are all (probably) Lawful Good, but all add their own twists on the formula. Carrot possesses such a high Charisma score that he can literally [[Diplomancer|charm people into doing what he wants]], but when that fails he tricks people into doing what he wants, technically avoiding a non-Lawful alignment by twisting the law into a pretzel when he can. Vimes follows both the letter and the spirit of the Law whenever he can stretch it, but isn't above committing illegal acts to uphold Lawful purposes. Granny is Evil by nature, but Good by necessity and ''hates'' it, since her sister got first pick on the question "are you a good witch or a bad witch?" and chose to be bad. To combat this, she continually takes out her frustration on other people by acting like the spiteful and entitled octogenarian that she technically is, avoiding a fall into True Neutral or Neutral Evil because witches are ''supposed'' to act a bit nutty, even the Lawful ones, and none of it matters as long as she does what's capital-r Right.

The AD&D book "The Complete Paladin's Handbook" has a section ("Virtues", page 33) on the behavior and code of conduct a Paladin normally upholds; that of a gracious and well-mannered individual who respects good and the law, but is not on an endless crusade to uphold it. They would not upset a tavern just because they detected an evil presence within and risk causing chaos, for example.

Another way to play lawful good is to play your paladin like a modern soldier: able and willing to do anything needed to win, except as decreed by certain laws and customs of war, e.g. for example, the Geneva and Hague Conventions. Those laws still restrict the actions of a soldier, but he is still expected to act with common sense in order to achieve victory and not follow orders that violate those laws.

== How to avoid it while playing lawful neutral ==
This is arguably even harder than avoiding it whilst playing Lawful Good; at least Lawful Good types are ''supposed'' to balance their calling to law & order vs. their calling to good. Lawful Neutral types are often categorized by their firm belief that law and order are the only things of importance, with morality being dismissed as insignificant next to maintaining of order. The primary key to doing so is to keep a proper perspective; traffic laws, for example, have their place in the scheme of things. When you are racing to prevent the nuclear annihilation of a city is ''not'' that place. Don't get so bogged down with legal minutia that you allow far greater acts of destruction and anarchy to occur in whilst you attend to the little things.

[[Judge Dredd]] can be a good example of this. For example, in the opening sequence of the 2012 ''Dredd'' movie, he pursues a car full of criminals but does not shoot at them until they collide with and kill a pedestrian, and even then only shoots to disable the van's tires. He doesn't shoot to kill until one of them threatens to kill a hostage and refuses to accept an offer to surrender. Also, when he sees a vagrant sitting outside the crime scene Dredd tells him not to be there when he gets back instead of arresting him because he has better things to do at the moment. Of course, when he's just doing the rounds on his birthday, he'll issue noise citations to children who sing to him because <s>he is The Law</s> it's just plain embarrassing (and then donate the presents he receives to an orphanage because he's not [[That Guy]]).

This is not to say that a Lawful Neutral character doesn't recognize when they break the law or go against the general sense of law (Law) when called to; they do, and they're likely to be annoyed by it. Tenya Iida from My Hero Academia explores this concept, although he can sometimes break into Lawful Stupid, too.

== Examples of Lawful Stupid ==
* The [[Inevitable]]s, divine [[golem]]-like beings with the duty to enact laws and enforce contracts. There's a story of one named "Obligatum VII" (the seventh in its line because six times prior people had the common sense to stop him) who trying to free the [[BBEG]] in a campaign from the book [[Elder Evils]]. The story goes that some mages summoned an eldritch abomination named Pandorym to blackmail the gods, making a contract with it to destroy the universe when it was summoned. The wizards imprisoned Pandorym instead of finishing the ritual to let it loose so that it wouldn't destroy the universe before they were ready, but the gods just smote the stupid wizards the instant they were done imprisoning Pandorym so he's stuck. Well, Obligatum is here to set things right, and make sure that poor, imprisoned death machine gets the freedom it was promised to carry out its goal, which through some warped sense of honor it is willing to do. How exactly this does not bring him into conflict with another type of Inevitable, the Varakhut, whose job it is to prevent deicide is a whole other box of worms.
* The [[Harmonium]] from [[Planescape]]. ''"The Harmonium believes that peace is a better end than war. [...] If it takes thumping heads to spread the truth, well, the Harmonium's ready to thump heads. Sure, there may not be peace right away, but every time the Harmonium gets rid of an enemy, the multiverse is that much closer to the universal harmony it was meant to have."'' This attitude is how the third layer of [[Arcadia]] shifted into [[Mechanus]], and the gods of Arcadia had to start over. Whoops. What's more, don't forget that they exterminated all non-lawful ''good and neutral'' species in the world where their faction originated. Some good.
* The [[Modron]] race, similarly to the Inevitables above, due to being extraplanar mechanical lifeforms who embody Lawful Neutral. Except they somehow have even less personality. Imagine a poorly-written chatbot with arms, legs and the ability to beat you over the head; that's basically a Modron. They can't even understand the idea that their assumptions may be incorrect.
* [[Helm]], the Lawful Neutral God of Guardians and Watchmen from the [[Forgotten Realms]] has earned this kind of reputation in-universe. Nobody will ''ever'' let him live it down that, during the [[Time of Troubles]], he killed Mystara, the Goddess of Magic, for trying to get back into the upper planes after Ao kicked them all out, despite the fact he knew that this would severely damage the fabric of reality in the process. As a result, [[wild magic]] zones and dead magic zones are commonly called "Helmlands". He also catches a lot of flak for the role his worshippers played in the massacres in [[Maztica]], but that's not so much Lawful Stupid as religious bigotry and the priest's only daughter being sacrificed by one of the natives.
* The stereotypical [[Space Marine]]. Stealth is cowardice, frontal assaults are the only way to go. On the occasion they do utilize tactics like stealth, feints, and flanking, it's all to help the frontal assault succeed rather than the other way around. Retreating is never an option, even if it's to gain more cover. Some will never field [[psyker]]s, ignore [[xenos]], and some won't even cooperate with other [[Space Marine Chapter]]s. A special case being [[Warhammer 40,000 Space Marine|Leandros]].
* The Starks from [[A Song of Ice and Fire|Game of Thrones]]. When Ned Stark finds out that Joffrey and his siblings are incest born bastards, he does the most asinine thing possible and tells Cersei, instead of going to Robert directly. He also tells his daughters of his plan, which causes Sansa to blab to everybody. His son Robb Stark has even more fuck ups, namely executing one of his top generals when he should have kept him around (though said Karstark general undeniably disrespected his authority), failing to communicate with Edmure (though Edmure is incompetent), and blatantly breaking his promise to Walder Frey because he felt bad he screwed some other chick and decided to marry her in order to keep their honor intact (though Walker Frey is admittedly a backstabbing opportunist who might have betrayed him anyway as Robb was undoubtedly losing the war. Also, Walder’s choice to violate one of the most valued rules of honor that even pirates, thieves and murderers keep, simultaneously fucked over his own side by becoming the group absolutely nobody on any side wants to be associated with. Not even the people he betrays Robb in favor of). This kind of shit ends up with the Starks practically destroyed.
** An important qualifier is that these decisions aren't entirely motivated by stupid adherence to honour, with personal history heavily motivating the decisions or with the full consequences of the actions not being immediately obvious.
* The Jedi from the Star Wars Prequels are this, as [[Ultramarines|they followed the Jedi Code - which was meant as a mere guideline - as a set of unbreakable rules]] and set out to completely repress all emotion in somewhat unfounded fear of those emotions leading to the dark side, when they should have acknowledged that which makes us human and simply taught how to use them positively. Such arbitrarily following of the code leads the Council to turn a blind eye to the various problems Anakin Skywalker was having, thereby unintentionally sealing their own downfall.
** Works set before the Prequels shows that this is hardly a new problem for the Jedi Order. Knights Of The Old Republic features a Jedi named Atris who's incredibly obsessed with following the code to the letter and wiping out the Sith. This leads to her being filled with bitterness and remorse after her best friend the Exile is kicked out of the Order, but also leaves her too arrogant to talk to anyone about it. Instead she starts to hide herself away in a temple filled with Sith holocrons to be alone and meditate, and since Sith holocrons literally exude Dark Side-tainted Force energy, she gets unknowingly corrupted into a Sith. Yes, she was so Lawful Stupid that it ''turned her evil''.
* The [[Dwarfs (Warhammer Fantasy)|Dawi]]. They are obsessed with the concept of revenge, as '''all Grudges must be answered for.''' This causes them to wage many unnecessary wars, which is especially stupid since they are a dying race. The fluff speaks of two dwarven lords who were fighting each other in a generation-spanning War of Grudges, even while they were being invaded by an Orc warband. The two lords eventually got together and realized that neither of them remembered what their clans were fighting over, forgave each other, and resolved to ally against the Orcs beating down on their gates. Both sides were promptly crushed by a cave-in caused by ''the gods themselves'' for failing to avenge their respective Grudges and the Orcs got to loot another Karak without difficulty.
* The [[Azorius Senate|Azorius]] from [[Magic: The Gathering]]. The guild makes so many laws that they can literally arrest ANYONE, and then justify it by finding one of the myriad of pointless laws they've passed that the individual has undoubtedly broken. They'll even arrest someone for merely ''thinking'' about breaking a law (see the card [http://gatherer.wizards.com/pages/Card/Details.aspx?multiverseid=270794| Psychic Spiral] for proof.) This culminates in them, under Dovin Baan, endorsing [[Bolas]] in ''War of the Spark'' - doesn't matter if there's undead killing everyone and everything erupting into war, as long as your guildleader is officially elected everything is fine.
* The Sangheli, or Elites, from the [[Halo]] franchise. With a ridiculously rigid Bushido-style code of honor that makes the Ultramarines seem like pragmatic chaps, the Elites have often lost battles to humans they could have otherwise won, if they weren't so blindingly "honorable" (Ignoring for the minute that they had no problem turning a planet into slag.) Full frontal assaults, suicide charges, blindingly following three shady testicle-looking douchebags, and a stupid insistence on fighting the enemy fairly are all par for the course. But the most glaring example of their stupidity has to come from the fact that they consider it a [[What|dishonor to either get their own blood shed off the battlefield or become involved in a medical practice]]. Even Klingons aren't that stupid. The only reason they even win against the Jiralhanae (Brutes) is because the Brutes are more Stupid Evil than the Sangheli are Lawful Stupid. [[Humanity Fuck Yeah|Well, that, and the fact that they had allied with the Humans by that point.]]
* The Nugganite religion, from Terry Pratchett's ''Monstrous Regiment'': the decrees of the Borogravian god Nuggan forbid everything from garlic, chocolate, and the smell of beets, to the color blue and ''babies''. Many Borogravians privately acknowledge that most of Nuggan's Abominations are completely ridiculous (and let the most extreme ones slide, because they're virtually impossible to enforce anyway), even while fretting about which Abominations they're currently committing. Due the way belief works in Discworld, Nugganites came to believe in nothing but the Abominations themselves, which diverted worship away from Nuggan himself. In the end, it's revealed that Nuggan has rotted away until nothing is left but a disembodied voice babbling Abominations nonstop.
* For the literature amateurs, Inspector Javert form ''Les Misérables''. As the author himself explained: the man was built upon two simple and good precepts, namely respect of authority and refusal of rebellion; but he made those look evil in his fanatical exaggeration of them. In a rare occurence for that kind of character, Javert ends up overcoming the stupid part of the alignment as part of his arc: When finally faced with a Lawful Good convict, he [[Blam|BLAM himself]] rather than capture him (or let him go and live as an imperfect cop). Way to get out of a Paladin dilemma.
** As Hugo injected a ton of social criticism in his books, public servants putting the law above morals is a recurring theme. Ninety-Three has Cimourdain, a political commissar during the French Revolution, ending up condemning his own adoptive son to death for freeing a traitor. Much like Javert, he takes his own life during the execution.
*Speaking of [[Commissar]]s, although protagonists like [[Colonel-Commissar Ibram Gaunt|Ibram Gaunt]] or [[Ciaphas Cain]] will mostly be sensible individuals (if only because nobody wants to read about a teamkilling fucktard for a dozen or so books), background commissars in the Imperial Guard are often the epitome of Lawful Stupid: You left your post to report vital intel to Headquarters? That's a summary execution for ya.

[[Category:Dungeons & Dragons]][[Category:Alignment]]

Lawful Stupid

2020-10-24T04:32:17Z

2600:1700:19C0:2760:9585:A204:181C:FCEB: /* How to avoid it while playing lawful neutral */

{{fail}}
[[File:Obligatum VII.jpg|300px|thumb|right|[[Inevitable|Obligatum]] [[Elder Evils#Pandorym|VII]], the posterboy of Lawful Stupid.]]
{{Topquote|You wear your honor like a suit of armor, Stark. You think it keeps you safe, but all it does is weigh you down and make it hard for you to move.|[[A Song of Ice and Fire|Lord Petyr "Littlefinger" Baelish to Lord Eddard Stark.]]}}

'''Lawful Stupid''' is gamer slang (derived from the [[Dungeons & Dragons]] [[alignment]] system, but can easily be applied to [[character]]s in any [[role-playing game]] as well as fiction in general) for a specific way of playing a [[Lawful Good]] or, especially, a [[Lawful Neutral]] character, most infamously a [[Paladin]]. It is characterized by lack of common sense, following the rules arbitrarily without actually understanding them and just generally being an annoying prick. He's [[that guy]] who will stop a chase scene because he has to chastise someone that was jaywalking. Lawful Stupid players are one of the main reasons (along with asshole [[DM]]s) why people dislike the Paladin class. It can also be a jab at the fact that Intelligence is a common [[dump stat]] for Paladins in 3.5, since their [[MAD]] mandates high Charisma and Wisdom, the traditional dump stats of combat classes. [[Pathfinder]] allows them to dump Wisdom, the only class that can really do so, making this even worse.

Although the iconic Lawful Stupid character is a poorly-played Paladin (Alignment requirement: Lawful Good), non-Paladin depictions are almost invariably [[Lawful Neutral]], since this kind of characterization is a disappointingly logical extrapolation from a character alignment that can be summed up as "[[Judge Dredd|the Law is the Law and all that matters is that it is the law;]] [[Derp|whether or not it helps or hurts people is irrelevant, the LAW must be upheld!]]"

A lot of this really stems from a surface understanding of the Lawful alignment. While following the law is a lawful act, following the rules is not the end-all definition of the Lawful alignment. Lawful means orderly. So the type of person who religiously organizes their sock drawer would be considered Lawful. A Lawful person can disagree with the laws of the land, wanting to replace them with new laws. It's the desire for order and logic that matters. Of course these would be sensible Lawful people, and therefor not "Lawful Stupid".

Compare to [[Chaotic Stupid]], [[Stupid Evil]], [[Stupid Good]], and [[Stupid Neutral]]. There really are a lot of ways to be stupid in fantasy games, aren't there?

== How to avoid it while playing Lawful Good ==
Required Reading: The [[Discworld]] series by Terry Pratchett, in particular anything having to do with the Witches of Lancre or the Ankh Morpork City Watch. Granny Weatherwax, Sam Vimes, and Carrot Ironfoundersson are all (probably) Lawful Good, but all add their own twists on the formula. Carrot possesses such a high Charisma score that he can literally [[Diplomancer|charm people into doing what he wants]], but when that fails he tricks people into doing what he wants, avoiding a non-Lawful alignment by twisting the law into a pretzel when he can. Vimes follows both the letter and the spirit of the Law whenever he can stretch it, but isn't above committing illegal acts to uphold Lawful purposes. Granny is Evil by nature but Good by necessity and ''hates'' it, since her sister got first pick on the question "are you a good witch or a bad witch?" and chose to be bad. To combat this, she continually takes out her frustration on other people by acting like the spiteful and entitled octogenarian that she technically is, avoiding a fall into True Neutral or Neutral Evil because witches are ''supposed'' to act a bit nutty, even the Lawful ones, and none of it matters as long as she does what's capital-r Right.

The AD&D book "The Complete Paladin's Handbook" has a section("Virtues", page 33) on the behavior and code of conduct a Paladin normally upholds; that of a gracious and well-mannered individual who respects good and the law, but is not on an endless crusade to uphold it. They would not upset a tavern just because they detected an evil presence within and risk causing chaos, for example.

Another way to play lawful good is to play your paladin like a modern soldier: able and willing to do anything needed to win, except as decreed by certain laws and customs of war (for example, the Geneva and Hague Conventions). Those laws still restrict the actions of a soldier but he is still expected to act with common sense in order to achieve victory and not follow orders that violate those laws.

== How to avoid it while playing lawful neutral ==
This is arguably even harder than avoiding it whilst playing Lawful Good; at least Lawful Good types are ''supposed'' to balance their calling to law & order vs. their calling to good. Lawful Neutral types are often categorized by their firm belief that law and order are the only things of importance, with morality being dismissed as insignificant next to maintaining of order. The primary key to doing so is to keep a proper perspective; traffic laws, for example, have their place in the scheme of things. When you are racing to prevent the nuclear annihilation of a city is ''not'' that place. Don't get so bogged down with legal minutia that you allow far greater acts of destruction and anarchy to occur in whilst you attend to the little things.

[[Judge Dredd]] can be a good example of this. For example, in the opening sequence of the 2012 ''Dredd'' movie, he pursues a car full of criminals but does not shoot at them until they collide with and kill a pedestrian, and even then only shoots to disable the van's tires. He doesn't shoot to kill until one of them threatens to kill a hostage and refuses to accept an offer to surrender. Also, when he sees a vagrant sitting outside the crime scene Dredd tells him not to be there when he gets back instead of arresting him because he has better things to do at the moment. Of course, when he's just doing the rounds on his birthday, he'll issue noise citations to children who sing to him because <s>he is The Law</s> it's just plain embarrassing (and then donate the presents he receives to an orphanage because he's not [[That Guy]]).

This is not to say that a Lawful Neutral character doesn't recognize when they break the law or go against the general sense of law (Law) when called to; they do, and they're likely to be annoyed by it. Tenya Iida from My Hero Academia explores this concept, although he can sometimes break into Lawful Stupid, too.

== Examples of Lawful Stupid ==
* The [[Inevitable]]s, divine [[golem]]-like beings with the duty to enact laws and enforce contracts. There's a story of one named "Obligatum VII" (the seventh in its line because six times prior people had the common sense to stop him) who trying to free the [[BBEG]] in a campaign from the book [[Elder Evils]]. The story goes that some mages summoned an eldritch abomination named Pandorym to blackmail the gods, making a contract with it to destroy the universe when it was summoned. The wizards imprisoned Pandorym instead of finishing the ritual to let it loose so that it wouldn't destroy the universe before they were ready, but the gods just smote the stupid wizards the instant they were done imprisoning Pandorym so he's stuck. Well, Obligatum is here to set things right, and make sure that poor, imprisoned death machine gets the freedom it was promised to carry out its goal, which through some warped sense of honor it is willing to do. How exactly this does not bring him into conflict with another type of Inevitable, the Varakhut, whose job it is to prevent deicide is a whole other box of worms.
* The [[Harmonium]] from [[Planescape]]. ''"The Harmonium believes that peace is a better end than war. [...] If it takes thumping heads to spread the truth, well, the Harmonium's ready to thump heads. Sure, there may not be peace right away, but every time the Harmonium gets rid of an enemy, the multiverse is that much closer to the universal harmony it was meant to have."'' This attitude is how the third layer of [[Arcadia]] shifted into [[Mechanus]], and the gods of Arcadia had to start over. Whoops. What's more, don't forget that they exterminated all non-lawful ''good and neutral'' species in the world where their faction originated. Some good.
* The [[Modron]] race, similarly to the Inevitables above, due to being extraplanar mechanical lifeforms who embody Lawful Neutral. Except they somehow have even less personality. Imagine a poorly-written chatbot with arms, legs and the ability to beat you over the head; that's basically a Modron. They can't even understand the idea that their assumptions may be incorrect.
* [[Helm]], the Lawful Neutral God of Guardians and Watchmen from the [[Forgotten Realms]] has earned this kind of reputation in-universe. Nobody will ''ever'' let him live it down that, during the [[Time of Troubles]], he killed Mystara, the Goddess of Magic, for trying to get back into the upper planes after Ao kicked them all out, despite the fact he knew that this would severely damage the fabric of reality in the process. As a result, [[wild magic]] zones and dead magic zones are commonly called "Helmlands". He also catches a lot of flak for the role his worshippers played in the massacres in [[Maztica]], but that's not so much Lawful Stupid as religious bigotry and the priest's only daughter being sacrificed by one of the natives.
* The stereotypical [[Space Marine]]. Stealth is cowardice, frontal assaults are the only way to go. On the occasion they do utilize tactics like stealth, feints, and flanking, it's all to help the frontal assault succeed rather than the other way around. Retreating is never an option, even if it's to gain more cover. Some will never field [[psyker]]s, ignore [[xenos]], and some won't even cooperate with other [[Space Marine Chapter]]s. A special case being [[Warhammer 40,000 Space Marine|Leandros]].
* The Starks from [[A Song of Ice and Fire|Game of Thrones]]. When Ned Stark finds out that Joffrey and his siblings are incest born bastards, he does the most asinine thing possible and tells Cersei, instead of going to Robert directly. He also tells his daughters of his plan, which causes Sansa to blab to everybody. His son Robb Stark has even more fuck ups, namely executing one of his top generals when he should have kept him around (though said Karstark general undeniably disrespected his authority), failing to communicate with Edmure (though Edmure is incompetent), and blatantly breaking his promise to Walder Frey because he felt bad he screwed some other chick and decided to marry her in order to keep their honor intact (though Walker Frey is admittedly a backstabbing opportunist who might have betrayed him anyway as Robb was undoubtedly losing the war. Also, Walder’s choice to violate one of the most valued rules of honor that even pirates, thieves and murderers keep, simultaneously fucked over his own side by becoming the group absolutely nobody on any side wants to be associated with. Not even the people he betrays Robb in favor of). This kind of shit ends up with the Starks practically destroyed.
** An important qualifier is that these decisions aren't entirely motivated by stupid adherence to honour, with personal history heavily motivating the decisions or with the full consequences of the actions not being immediately obvious.
* The Jedi from the Star Wars Prequels are this, as [[Ultramarines|they followed the Jedi Code - which was meant as a mere guideline - as a set of unbreakable rules]] and set out to completely repress all emotion in somewhat unfounded fear of those emotions leading to the dark side, when they should have acknowledged that which makes us human and simply taught how to use them positively. Such arbitrarily following of the code leads the Council to turn a blind eye to the various problems Anakin Skywalker was having, thereby unintentionally sealing their own downfall.
** Works set before the Prequels shows that this is hardly a new problem for the Jedi Order. Knights Of The Old Republic features a Jedi named Atris who's incredibly obsessed with following the code to the letter and wiping out the Sith. This leads to her being filled with bitterness and remorse after her best friend the Exile is kicked out of the Order, but also leaves her too arrogant to talk to anyone about it. Instead she starts to hide herself away in a temple filled with Sith holocrons to be alone and meditate, and since Sith holocrons literally exude Dark Side-tainted Force energy, she gets unknowingly corrupted into a Sith. Yes, she was so Lawful Stupid that it ''turned her evil''.
* The [[Dwarfs (Warhammer Fantasy)|Dawi]]. They are obsessed with the concept of revenge, as '''all Grudges must be answered for.''' This causes them to wage many unnecessary wars, which is especially stupid since they are a dying race. The fluff speaks of two dwarven lords who were fighting each other in a generation-spanning War of Grudges, even while they were being invaded by an Orc warband. The two lords eventually got together and realized that neither of them remembered what their clans were fighting over, forgave each other, and resolved to ally against the Orcs beating down on their gates. Both sides were promptly crushed by a cave-in caused by ''the gods themselves'' for failing to avenge their respective Grudges and the Orcs got to loot another Karak without difficulty.
* The [[Azorius Senate|Azorius]] from [[Magic: The Gathering]]. The guild makes so many laws that they can literally arrest ANYONE, and then justify it by finding one of the myriad of pointless laws they've passed that the individual has undoubtedly broken. They'll even arrest someone for merely ''thinking'' about breaking a law (see the card [http://gatherer.wizards.com/pages/Card/Details.aspx?multiverseid=270794| Psychic Spiral] for proof.) This culminates in them, under Dovin Baan, endorsing [[Bolas]] in ''War of the Spark'' - doesn't matter if there's undead killing everyone and everything erupting into war, as long as your guildleader is officially elected everything is fine.
* The Sangheli, or Elites, from the [[Halo]] franchise. With a ridiculously rigid Bushido-style code of honor that makes the Ultramarines seem like pragmatic chaps, the Elites have often lost battles to humans they could have otherwise won, if they weren't so blindingly "honorable" (Ignoring for the minute that they had no problem turning a planet into slag.) Full frontal assaults, suicide charges, blindingly following three shady testicle-looking douchebags, and a stupid insistence on fighting the enemy fairly are all par for the course. But the most glaring example of their stupidity has to come from the fact that they consider it a [[What|dishonor to either get their own blood shed off the battlefield or become involved in a medical practice]]. Even Klingons aren't that stupid. The only reason they even win against the Jiralhanae (Brutes) is because the Brutes are more Stupid Evil than the Sangheli are Lawful Stupid. [[Humanity Fuck Yeah|Well, that, and the fact that they had allied with the Humans by that point.]]
* The Nugganite religion, from Terry Pratchett's ''Monstrous Regiment'': the decrees of the Borogravian god Nuggan forbid everything from garlic, chocolate, and the smell of beets, to the color blue and ''babies''. Many Borogravians privately acknowledge that most of Nuggan's Abominations are completely ridiculous (and let the most extreme ones slide, because they're virtually impossible to enforce anyway), even while fretting about which Abominations they're currently committing. Due the way belief works in Discworld, Nugganites came to believe in nothing but the Abominations themselves, which diverted worship away from Nuggan himself. In the end, it's revealed that Nuggan has rotted away until nothing is left but a disembodied voice babbling Abominations nonstop.
* For the literature amateurs, Inspector Javert form ''Les Misérables''. As the author himself explained: the man was built upon two simple and good precepts, namely respect of authority and refusal of rebellion; but he made those look evil in his fanatical exaggeration of them. In a rare occurence for that kind of character, Javert ends up overcoming the stupid part of the alignment as part of his arc: When finally faced with a Lawful Good convict, he [[Blam|BLAM himself]] rather than capture him (or let him go and live as an imperfect cop). Way to get out of a Paladin dilemma.
** As Hugo injected a ton of social criticism in his books, public servants putting the law above morals is a recurring theme. Ninety-Three has Cimourdain, a political commissar during the French Revolution, ending up condemning his own adoptive son to death for freeing a traitor. Much like Javert, he takes his own life during the execution.
*Speaking of [[Commissar]]s, although protagonists like [[Colonel-Commissar Ibram Gaunt|Ibram Gaunt]] or [[Ciaphas Cain]] will mostly be sensible individuals (if only because nobody wants to read about a teamkilling fucktard for a dozen or so books), background commissars in the Imperial Guard are often the epitome of Lawful Stupid: You left your post to report vital intel to Headquarters? That's a summary execution for ya.

[[Category:Dungeons & Dragons]][[Category:Alignment]]

Stupid Evil

2020-10-24T04:25:05Z

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{{Topquote|No Muttley, we can't win fairly. We are villains, ergo we have to cheat!|Dick Dastardly, recognizing his role in ''Wacky Races'' while being unable to avoid playing it. Naturally, the finish line is right behind him.}}
{{Topquote|If you acquire a reputation as a mad dog, you'll be treated as a mad dog; taken out back and slaughtered for pig feed.|Roose Bolton to his son Ramsay in ''Game of Thrones''.}}
[[File:Skeletor.jpg|right|300px|thumb|"Nevermind what I said, just do what I said!"]]
Yes, [[Lawful Stupid]] has its Evil counterpart. A general trait of '''Stupid Evil''' is doing evil things for the sake of being evil (e.g. pettiness, self gratification, etc.), rather than because they are (morality aside) easy or viable paths towards wealth, power, revenge, or whatever the villain's goal is. This is especially true when a non-evil (or even less evil) way of doing things would work better.

A villain who is truly insane can get away with this sort of thing since what compels them to act in an evil manner is the fact that they have some screws loose, and likewise comedic villains can get away with it because their evil is just a plot device to cause funny things to happen. However, "serious" nemeses and long-term, high-threat villains are usually expected to have a goal and some capacity for rational planning; a villain who takes time out of a busy day to kick a puppy or eat a kitten just to establish evil credibility will probably be treated with derision by players. By the same token, a villain who presents an otherwise seemingly insurmountable threat being undone by a massive fatal flaw - such as pride or hubris - can make for quite a compelling yarn.

[[TVTropes|Compare]] to [[Chaotic Stupid]]. They're not quite the same, but there's often a lot of overlap due the tendency of bad players and writers to mistake "chaotic" with "act like as big of an obnoxious asshole as physically possible".

==Examples of Stupid Evil==
===[[A Song of Ice and Fire]]===
The amount of retarded villains in this series is truly staggering. And yet, despite all of the stupid evil committed by them, [[Grimdark|they were able to secure many victories in the beginning]], even if only because the good guys are either more [[Lawful Stupid]] or [[Stupid Good]]. Ultimately however, most of the Lannisters and their allies, including the Boltons and Freys met their ends in spite of their ruthlessness.

Of course, A Song of Ice and Fire is known for its frequent grey morality, and most Stupid Evil characters have something of an explanation. Even then, you'd be inclined to wonder how far ahead some of them were really thinking, especially in the adaptations - though it's arguably intentional, possibly to demonstrate how [[Not As Planned|a lack of pragmatism fucks people over in the long-term]], especially in a realm so rapidly driven by [[Just as planned|ever-changing politics and schemes]] ([[Skub|or possibly because of bad writing, who knows]]).

'''The Lannisters'''

Lannister-brand parenting and ruling revolves around nepotism, an iron fist and enough money to solve any problem thrown at them. While they enjoy significant successes at first, they also gave birth to some of the most short-sighted sociopaths who rely on their fortune, both material and immaterial, to try and win the Game of Thrones, and all ultimately lose in the end due to both fortunes running short. Examples of the Lannisters' worst offenders:

* Joffrey Baratheon is overall far too impulsive and sadistic for his own good, which is an already disastrous pairing of personality traits to combine with the fact that he's 12 or 13 years old in the books. On the note of not-even-really-excuses, there's also possible mental instability resulting from the fact that he's inbred and his mother is Cersei (more on her in a moment).
** He sends an assassin armed with a Valyrian Blade to kill Bran Stark - this is one of only a few hundred such weapons in all of Westeros, and an unusual weapon for a common hitman when a common dirk would have sufficed; when that fails, it causes the Starks to suspect the Lannisters. He also kills Eddard Stark to make an example of him, therefore sparking an unnecessary and very costly civil war that went against what his family had planned. Despite that, they still came out on top since they are still standing while the Starks are scattered, due mainly to Tywin and Tyrion being [[Creed|tactical geniuses and strategic masterminds.]]
** He also chooses to ignore his duties and the welfare of his people in favor of satiating his sadistic behavior, even abusing them when they're seeking his help. He regularly abuses Sansa in particular, and threatens to have her killed despite the fact it will reduce her value as a political hostage and (in their eyes) could cause the Starks to kill their political hostage, Jaime Lannister.
** Having no regard for the peasants and working class under your charge is already a bad idea, but is ''especially'' so when there's an impending siege and tensions are already high. This leads to a riot that causes several deaths when he orders a mass execution after one member of the crowd threw a dung ball at him.
** Even his family isn't safe from his viciousness, occasionally to the point of team-killing fuckery: he has one of his Kingsguard try to murder his uncle Tyrion in the middle of the Battle of Blackwater instead of just simply poisoning him (as Tyrion pointed out). He even calls Tywin a coward. ''Out loud. In front of other people. '''To his face.''''' Luckily for Joffrey they were related, or he would have been struck down. And as what turns out to be a final hurrah at his wedding, he insults his in-laws and his bride at their wedding reception and subjects Tyrion to petty tortures in front of everyone.

* Cersei Lannister, while not as dumb as her son Joffrey (low a bar as that is), is egotistic and paranoid as fuck; if she, for any reason, thinks you might threaten her or her children, even for something as minor as telling her her latest idea is a bad one, you're in trouble. At best, she will view you as an enemy and will be a passive-aggressive bitch to you, and at worst she'll have you brutally tortured to death, even if you're one of House Lannister's allies to whom good relations are vital. On top of all that, she's a contender for Worst Mother in Westeros, and her cruelty drove away even her incestuous lover, Jaime Lannister (which happened much earlier into the books than in the TV show).
** She invited Gregor Clegane (see below) to King's Landing at the same time Oberyn Martell is visiting, despite the fact that Gregor is the reason there's bad blood between House Lannister and House Martell, and the Martells know it.
** After Joffrey died, she went out of her way to rig the trial for his death against Tyrion, despite the circumstances ''already'' being against him - this made him more determined than ever to survive, and tips off Oberyn that Tyrion is innocent of the crime. This led to the duel between Oberyn and Gregor that ruined the Lannister/Martell alliance and ''nearly'' cost the Lannisters their pet beast.
** She also responded to a satirical puppet show about House Lannister being evil tyrants by having anyone who saw it either sharply fined (up to half of all their money if they're rich) or mutilated (an eye cut out if they're too poor to pay), and then ordering the puppeteers executed. She didn't even mind the play at first - she only took offence because the ending had the Lannisters getting their comeuppance at the hands of a Targaryen. Then, instead of the headsman, she did something worse and handed the puppeteers over to her resident mad scientist for deadly experiments at his request. Ironically, events following this would vindicate the puppeteers for their play (more on ''that'' below).
** Cersei encouraged the worst aspects of her kids; in the case of Joffrey, this is like attempting to put out a forest fire with napalm. Her atrocious parenting, combined with conceiving Joffrey with her brother Jamie AND Robert's own negligence, is the reason Joffrey's such a repulsive asshole. She ignores the numerous acts of cruelty and stupidity of her eldest son, and treats any criticism of him as a personal attack on ''her''.
** She was an overbearing mother to Tommen - her actually half-decent person of a second son - to the point of [[What|trying to make him more like Joffrey]], which inevitably failed and made Tommen a gullible yes-man of a momma's boy. This in turn left them vulnerable to the ambitions of Margaery Tyrell, who tries to drive a wedge between them and threatens her plans to rule as queen regent until Tommen was of age.
** She killed a high septon because he was a cat's paw Tyrion put into power to keep the faith in House Lannister's pocket (being a decent but easily manipulated man), because Cersei's paranoia meant she feared that Tyrion was out to get her and that guy was in on it. This leads to a more competent and devout high septon getting into power with ambitions of his own. She then let him raise his own army, creating another player to threaten House Lannister's precarious position and one unbeholden to politics, which leads to her arrest - though he was smart in the books and played Cersei like a fiddle. In context, Cersei's undoing is a good thing - especially for everyone not allied with House Lannister.
** In the TV show, as revenge for the High Sparrow imprisoning her and Margaery taking her place as Queen (which is partly her fault in the ''first place''), she makes the perfectly rational decision to blow them all to fuck using magical napalm while they were at church for a trial. The end result was: Pissing off nearly every person in the Seven Kingdoms who followed the Faith; driving Tommen (who was friends with the High Sparrow and loved Margaery dearly) to commit suicide via jumping out a window; and pushing a pissed Olenna Tyrell to withdraw all the house's support from King's Landing and declare for the resurgent House Targaryen alongside Dorne, and stirring the Sparrows outside of King's Landing into a fervor at the Septon's martyrdom. Cersei and House Lannister now literally have no major allies left in Westeros sans the Freys, who aren't at all reliable and were destroyed by Arya and the Boltons when their treachery outstripped the benefits. Unfortunately, she was still one step ahead and easily took out Houses Tyrell and Dorne despite their efforts, using the Iron Bank to buy herself a mercenary force and recruit Euron at the cost of losing Casterly Rock to her rivals (though this was helped by some internal team-killing from Oberyn's widow, you'd swear it's a bloody epidemic in that show).
** Also in the TV show, when Daenerys and her supports come to parlay with Cersei's forces for help against the White Walkers and their zombie armies - bringing a captured zombie to Cersei's court as proof and cutting it up with all the pieces still attacking - Cersei did the stupidest possible thing and refused to support them, deciding she'd rather "let the dead eat them all". She ignored the fact that this would leave her on the receiving end of a curb-stomp battle from either the aforementioned Walkers (who would be bolstered by the dead from Daenerys' forces) or Daenerys' forces AND everyone still living in King's Landing who's had enough of her tyranny. This ultimately comes back to bite her when she kills Missandei and pushes Daenerys over the edge from Lawful Neutral to Stupid Evil as she gives no quarter to anyone in King's Landing and commands the Dorathki, Unsullied and her dragon to rape, pillage and burn down King's Landing and leave no survivors - Cersei and her brother Jamie were crushed to death by the falling rubble. Of course, as will soon be made clear, Danerys was already a draconian (hue) powder keg of Stupid Evil herself, but for now we move to...

* Arguably Tywin Lannister: while known for his image of being a deviously competent politician and general, his actions don't hold up to the hype under further scrutiny. His neurotic obsession with not having his house's reputation damaged leads him to condone and engage in acts of excessive cruelty and brutality that have long term negative consequences, with his patriarchal narcissism ultimately resulting in his death at the hands of his dwarf son.
** Spurned Tyrion out of spite for his unintentional role in his wife's death - she died in childbirth. He did this for Tyrion's entire life, including annulling Tyrion's marriage to a peasant girl by having her gang-raped while forcing Tyrion to watch ''and later join in'' - this act horrified even Tyrion's sword-for-hire Bronn, who said in Tyrion's shoes he'd have killed Tywin for that, father or not (note Bronn is an amoral mercenary who outright said he'd kill a baby for the right price). All this leaves the only one of his children who was both competent ''and'' legally available to inherit Casterly Rock with a burning hatred for Tywin.
** Sent Gregor Clegane after Elia Martell and her kids, planning for the children's death but hoping to use Elia as leverage against the Dornish; however, she dies as a result, with House Martell despising House Lannister, and likely setting in motion a possible (though ultimately ineffectual) poisoning with Widow's Blood by Oberyn Martell. (It stops up the bowels until the victim dies of sepsis, which may have been why he was on the shitter when Tyrion killed him).
** Ordered Clegane and the Brave Companions/Bloody Mummers mercenary company to run wild in the Riverlands, causing a major agricultural zone for the continent to drop in productivity during the onset of a winter that could last years. Those affected by the rampages of Gregor and the Bloody Mummers also started to join the Sparrows religious movement, which from a story perspective creates more opponents of House Lannister that have deep personal grievances with them (such as a peasant innkeeper, whose son the Mummers murdered and whose daughter Gregor raped).
** Orchestrated the Red Wedding, shredding House Lannister's political image and credibility throughout Westeros - nobody wants to negotiate with someone who doesn't follow the same rules of war as them, like say, honoring a right to hospitality that the entire continent respects. In a bitter stroke of irony, his own grandson Joffrey would be murdered by Olenna Tyrell at his own wedding with Margery to spare her of the same fate Sansa suffered, meaning that everything he did to bring Joffrey to power was all for nothing ''and'' drove a further rift between Tyrion for his falsely accused role of murdering his own brother, as well as allowing the Tyrells to have an advantage over the Lannisters with help from the Sparrows.
** In particular, he berated Tyrion for whoremongering while using prostitutes himself. This is worth noting not merely for the expected hypocrisy, but for the fact that Tywin likely took issue with his ''severe'' lack of discretion more than anything else: what son of a Lannister, much less ''his'' own son, should be so well-known as a skirt-chaser? It also goes back to what he did to his first wife and Shae; this last hurrah is what got him killed, as he mouthed off at Tyrion when the latter had a loaded crossbow pointed at him while he was stuck on the toilet and had learnt of his ultimate betrayal.

* Gregor Clegane is a serial killer with severe anger control issues, having gone through three wives who died under suspicious circumstances. At his keep, there's a high turnover rate among the servants, and even animals avoid his chambers. Before this, he maimed his brother Sandor and would've killed him if three other people didn't intervene, and he's heavily implied to have murdered his sister and father, despite the father doting on him even when his evil started to become apparent.
** The circumstances surrounding him and his brother are as such: Gregor once caught his brother playing with one of Gregor's discarded toy soldiers when they were children. He took the logical next step of holding his brother's face over the fire, permanently disfiguring that half of his face and mentally scarring him, and from that point he's arguably stagnated into a phase of prolonged "adult childhood" as a result of a developmental disorder, based on this and his other actions.
** Before the story starts, it's an open secret that he raped and murdered Rheagar's wife Elia Martell, even though he hadn't been ordered to do so. He also killed a baby, and though he'd been ordered to do so, the fact remains that [[Grimdark|he had no qualms about the deed and went so far as smashing its head against a wall]]. This bites him and the Lannisters in the ass BIG TIME later on, though he deserved it.
** After losing a jousting match, Gregor decapitates his own horse, then tries to kill his opponent, Loras Tyrell, and his own brother Sandor when the latter intervenes. Had Gregor succeeded, it's likely the Lannisters would've kissed any hope of an alliance with the Tyrells goodbye.
** The men who Gregor recruits as his hand-picked warriors aren't chosen for their intelligence or resourcefulness, and not even loyalty; they serve Gregor out of fear and desire of plunder, and prize their fighting skills and sadism, essentially raping and torturing random peasants to death for the lulz. This includes the prisoners from the taking of Harrenhal, many of whom were nobility and could have been used as leverage in the war.
** Arguably when, before killing Oberyn, Gregor shouts a confession to his crime of murdering and raping Elia in front of all of the nobles in King's Landing. This would've put House Martell and House Lannister at open war... if the Martells hadn't been already secretly plotting to destroy them, though this ''does'' push their schedule forward.
** For all that, there is at least some "justification" as to why this guy is kept around by House Lannister. He's a brutal warrior in every sense of the word who projects an aura of fear, and for all his butchery, raping, rage, and blunt cruelty, he's never threatened House Lannister directly and is (for want of a better word) content to be their pet beast. The logical conclusion of this and the damage from fighting Oberyn makes it painfully literal: he is now kept permanently addled by powerful cocktails of painkillers and other drugs, likely on purpose, to keep him useful as a warrior, albeit an effective husk of one. It is mentioned that milk of the poppy (opium in all but name) has basically no effect on him any more due to consuming it so much.

* Ramsay Bolton is the son of Roose, a cunning general who manipulated and back-stabbed his way into rulership of the North; unlike Roose, Ramsey lacks any strategic foresight and critical thinking, and is totally fearless and reckless with his actions, which Roose correctly points out will be his downfall if they are not curbed. This ends up coming across as more of an informed attribute due to the TV show's writing, but the result is ultimately the same. [[Fail|Shame he didn't listen to his old man, huh?]]
** He killed his half-brother, despite the fact that this also deprived his father of another heir, which in medieval-esque societies is important; the more offspring they have, the more likely the noble family is to survive.
** His savage exploits are known across Westeros, and he continuously pisses off the other Northern lords by hunting down their subjects for fun, partly inspiring half of the Northern Houses rebel against Bolton rule. He chooses to flay Ironborn captives alive, despite promising them clemency if they surrendered, along with turning Theon Greyjoy into his personal eunuch slave. This has ensured that the Ironborn will now fight to the death rather than sue for peace, and contemplate a full invasion of the North instead of merely raiding its settlements.
** In the books, after marrying the fake-Arya Stark (who everyone else thinks is the real one) he tortures her, threatens her and [[FATAL|tries to make her do certain things to his hunting dogs]]. This sets off the Northerners' [[Powder Keg of Justice]], causing an uprising against the Boltons that will likely end with Ramsay's and Roose's heads on spikes.
** He sent an assassin after Jon Snow. As Roose pointed out, Jon was the leader of a well-known and politically neutral organization, whose claim to the throne of House Stark was tenuous at best, and would've gone against his vows, a big deal in Westeros. Killing him would almost certainly create a martyr, or at least demonstrate to the other houses that House Bolton has no respect for neutrality.
** The TV version actually murdered his father in the middle of the war, fed his step-mother and infant half-brother to his dogs, and he'd also raped Sansa Stark beforehand after manipulating an arranged marriage between them. Yet he [[Mary Sue|somehow manages more (and often downright insane) successes than his book counterpart]] in spite of acting like little more than a rabid dog raised in nobility (the infamous "twenty good men" scene where trained killers' armor and expertise suddenly become useless against a half-naked Ramsay comes to mind).
** Unfortunately (for him), his fortune doesn't last, as being a team-killing fucktard ultimately got his own army wiped out before he was beaten to near-death by Jon Snow, culminating in Sansa feeding him to his own dogs -- who were only hungry enough to turn on him because he'd starved them for a week beforehand in anticipation of feeding them the Starks.

* Slaver's Bay (aka ''Stupid Evil: The Civilization''), a neo-Ghiscari settlement, is run by a bunch of decadent slave dealers who do nothing besides wax on about how great the 5 millennia dead old Ghiscari Empire was and leave their society in the Bronze Age... in a world one step removed from [[Medieval Stasis]].
** Of the four cities of Slaver's Bay, two of them, Meereen and Yunkai, believe that a bunch of slaves with spears and shields led by fops on horseback or in chariots wearing linen vests and helmets made to accommodate their stupid hairdos constitute a proper army. After Yunkai gets its ass kicked by Daenerys when she brings a half decent army to the field that doesn't run at the first excuse, they decide that it would be a good idea to raise ''new'' slave armies that are [[What|chained together and fight on stilts]].
** One of them, Astapor, trains Unsullied elite spear slaves who obey any order given to them without question, which they sell and use for defense. The Masters of Astapor [[Derp|agree to sell all the Unsullied they've got to Dany exchange for one of her dragons]], and she then proceeds to have the Unsullied sack their city and kill them.
** Admittedly, the prospect of owning a dragon, especially after they’re thought to be extinct for centuries and being the equivalent of a self-replenishing WMD, is an awfully tempting one given how new Unsullied are made each year. Despite that, it’s ''still'' extremely stupid that they questioned neither the possibility of how they can control said dragon (leading to one Master burning to death seconds after grabbing the dragon’s chain) ''nor'' the sense in selling every Unsullied warrior-slave to the same person and leaving none to defend themselves. They also never considered that the Unsullied, though trained to be obedient, might resent the brutality involved in their training ([[Grimdark|which included castrating them at a young age, sending aspirants into the city tasked with killing babies in front of their mothers to prove they'll follow even the vilest orders, giving them a puppy to care for in their first year then making them strangle it to death as a test of loyalty - killing those who fail this test, and making them take new names each day on pain of death - demeaning names like "black rat", "blue toad" or "red flea" - so they can't develop a sense of individual identity]]), and would seize a chance for vengeance which Dany happily gave them.
** For no particular tactical reason, the leadership of Meereen decided to taunt an oncoming army by having child slaves nailed to mileposts to die along the road - a decision which backfires on them rather spectacularly.

* Daenerys Targaryen of the TV show's continuity takes her newly earned spot in this list with a single but major action, through the sheer power of bad writing. In the second-to-last episode, she reduces the entire citizenry to dragonfire kindling through a series of events that Cersei is somewhat at fault for: Dany was already fixing to blow several gaskets because she was rejected by Jon Snow (who is her nephew and not as cest-willing as Jamie) and got one of her dragons killed (by [[What|completely forgetting about an entire fleet of ships]]), and then Cersei slams the final nail in the coffin of her rational thought by having her close friend Missandei killed. This last act is the impetus for Dany to torch 'em all and let the Seven sort it out, throwing away any and all goodwill she would have gained from King's Landing - virtually nobody held much love or loyalty for Cersei, and most of the common folk would have loved her had she not then decided to literally become her father.
** Don't get us wrong, signs of a dark, sadistic side to Daenerys were always there with the signpost punishment and other early signs of a "pay evil unto evil" mentality that cast shadows of doubt onto her image as the liberating Breaker of Chains. But with the way said signs were developed in the show (which is to say, almost ''not at all''), it is beyond stupefying how she went from "Messiah, Breaker of Chains" to truly being her father's daughter in the grand span of ''two episodes''. It's no wonder everyone save the Unsullied (who themselves were retconned enough that they might as well be unthinking automatons now, though Grey Worm had the excuse of being distraught over Missandei's death) and Dothraki (who actually enjoy random acts of slaughter like this) turned on her the moment they saw what she has become and got her assassinated.
** And no, we're not shitting you: in a televised interview, the showrunners were asked why Daenerys didn't do anything about the Iron Fleet, and Beinoff nervously said outright that [[What|she kind of forgot about them.]] That is almost (but just barely not quite) '''Dexter'' finale' levels of shit writing, wasted at the very end on such a spectacular crew and cast to boot. If GRRM intends to turn Dany evil and kill her off, he knows what NOT to do in ADOS - assuming TWOW, let alone ADOS, are ever finished.

===Other general examples===
* Strawman villains in poorly written fiction across the board.
* Villains in Saturday morning cartoons and similar fare (e.g. Wacky Races, Captain Planet).
* [[Grimderp|Grimdark as a whole often suffers]] from characters who make things crappy just for the sake of making things crappy.
* [[Edgy|Edgelord]] characters by preteens/actual teens (or users with a similar enough mentality) on DeviantArt (though one could argue Edgelords are more [[Chaotic Stupid]], this is a case by case basis).
* The 'villains' of many fringe-conspiracy theories would be Stupid Evil if they existed as depicted, since their plans undermine their own power bases, have little to no tangible gain, or else draw attention by plastering their logo on everything. It's also weird that despite how cartoonishly evil they are thought of, they don't bother to kill anyone exposing the conspiracies while making it look like an accident. This is probably because there is some overlap with the strawman characters - they just have to be Evil™ enough to scare whoever you're selling your bridge to into action.

===Other /tg/-relevant examples===
* The Sith in the ''[[Star Wars]]'' universe suffer from this greatly, and it's a major reason they keep losing to the Jedi and failed to keep any of their empires intact long-term. In fact, one could argue that they're a perfect case study on why Stupid Evil is a bad idea:
** Firstly, whereas the Jedi code encourages understanding yet controlling your emotions (that way you take them into account, but they don't prevent you from doing what is necessary), the Sith code encourages embracing your emotions and indeed, many of the most powerful Sith like Darth Vader are incredibly emotionally damaged. Thus Sith tend to do things in the heat of the moment and often lack the patience needed to be truly effective. Darth Malak can't find Revan and the Ebon Hawk crew on a planet he has control of? Oh well better just ''level his own planet'' with Star Destroyers, costing himself thousands of workers and soldiers in his psychotic and desperate rush to off his old master.
** Secondly, the Sith code is built on a hyper-Darwinist, "survival-of-the-fittest" structure. While this sounds decent enough on paper, in practice it meant that the Sith ''constantly'' backstabbed each other in idiotic power plays, often leading to Sith killing each other more often than they killed Jedi. Crossing with the "overly emotional" thing above, their lack of patience often led to them betraying each other way before it was beneficial to do so. Darth Bane was the first major Sith Lord to realize how stupid and unsustainable this lifestyle was, and did something about it for the benefit of the Order rather than themselves. His "rule of two" may have led to the Sith population being lower than ever before or after, but at least it kept the Sith order alive and prevented most of them from slaughtering each other in pathetic attempts to gobble up more power.
*** It should be noted that even the Sith themselves violate or weasel their way around the Rule of Two every now and then. Darth Maul was alive at the same time as Dooku & Palpatine (technically before Dooku defected after Qui-Gon's death but it still counts as Palps was already planning to replace him in Legends), and in the EU during Vader's time there were the Force-using "Hands of the Emperor" agents such as Mara Jade. They also have characters like Ventress who aren’t officially Sith Lords, yet are trained just like one. So while it decreases their numbers by a lot, they find ways around even when they actually obey said rule. This again is an aversion of idiocy, as a spare is a good a idea when only two people are allowed.
*** Also don't get the idea that Darth Bane's plan was sensible or not-backstabby. He wiped out almost all of the Sith in exchange for merely a small group of Jedi of the Jedi in an admittedly epic and arguably goddamn hilarious backstab, and part of the reason he did so wasn't because he was sure they'd fall into infighting - rather, Lord Kaan had most of them under his thumb thanks to psychic influence and strength - but because the Sith were acting in very un-Sithy ways, relying purely on strength of arms and unified armies rather than mastery of the Dark Side. Even when there was a very real chance the Sith could've won via these methods, he couldn't have that or slink off and make his rule of two on his own - he had to backstab everyone else first. Then, go figure, his sucessors ended up using those same pragmatic tactics until the Jedi declined enough to almost destroy them in one blow. To be fair, the survivors (read: the assholes who didn't help with the 300-year long galactic dark age after two and a half millennia of almost nonstop war) and their policies lead to the decline of the Jedi Order until they got Order 66'd.
** Thirdly and finally, Sith who engage in too much evil and envelope themselves too deeply in the Dark Side often suffer from an inability to properly sense the Light Side. This alienation of the Light is what lead to the otherwise brilliant Palpatine's death. He alienated altruism and good so utterly that he was not only unable to sense Luke Skywalker's presence during a critical moment, but he was also unable to sense that his apprentice Darth Vader still had some morality in him. Thus he attempts to tortuously kill Luke, and is killed himself when he fails to sense Vader's own paternal feelings and the betrayal they influence.
* The [[Skaven]] from [[Warhammer Fantasy]], whose rival clans always plan on backstabbing each other even if they're all fighting a mutual (and often far worse) enemy. A perfect plan for them involves getting their own enemies and allies to kill each other, until they are the only one left to face the next enemy - keep in mind that "they" doesn't just mean rival clans either; in an apocalyptic scenario, even their personal secretary is only barely less of an enemy than the hordes of the undead. As above, it takes the [[Horned Rat]], their god, as well as the invention of instant communication via the [[Farsqueaker]], to get their fuzzy little asses united...though in the Skaven's case, them being a species of Stupid Evil is entirely the ([[Lulz|hilarious]]) point and their society is explained as surviving in spite of themselves due to a ridiculous breeding rate.
* Humans in science and fantasy fiction often end up being Stupid Evil when the (usually incompetent) writer wants to make a statement about discrimination. According to these tales, humans are apparently overly-panicky and violent psychopaths itching for an excuse to murder the shit out of other species. For instance, in [[Avatar]] the human army is portrayed as a bunch of jingoist lunatics who want to slaughter the peaceful Na'vi for the resources they need, rather than trying to reap long-term benefits by making peaceful contact, in a clear exaggeration of tendencies that might have existed in the colonization era. The advent of [[Humanity Fuck Yeah]] is in part a reaction to this phenomenon.
* Some followers of [[Chaos]], such as [[Firaeveus Carron]], can prove to be this most of the time.
* [[Lolth]] actually enforces Stupid Evil in her worshipers: because of her, the Drow spend 3 quarters of their energy fighting each other instead of defending themselves, which is a really bad idea since they live in an underground city under constant threat of being [[rape]]d by [[illithid]]s and [[beholder]]s. In fact, when things get really bad, she literally has to tell them to get their shit together for a short period of time.
* [[/co/|The Joker.]] Once "merely" a criminal mastermind with a chaotic, unpredictable bent and joke-themed weapons (like a joy buzzer that gives a lethal electric shock and a squirting flower that sprays acid), he devolved in the 90's into a murder-happy rabid dog who kills for the jollies and because [[/d/|he gets off on being punched in the face by Batman]]. Although with ''Dark Knight'' and ''Joker'' he's grown out of the stupid phase and is now convincingly chaotic evil for reasons that make Batman look like a whiny rich kid.
* Starscream from [[Transformers]]. He's too ambitious and egotistical to realize how good his position as Megatron's second-in-command is, and so spends much of his time trying to usurp his leader with predictable failure. He also tends to do things on the spur of the moment to satisfy his own ego, as demonstrated in ''Prime'' where he angrily takes credit for killing Arcee's best friend Cliffjumper ''while in handcuffs in front of Arcee'', simply because he doesn't want Airachnid stealing the credit for things he did.

[[Category:Dungeons & Dragons]][[Category:Alignment]]

Crull

2020-10-24T03:59:47Z

2600:1700:19C0:2760:9585:A204:181C:FCEB:

[[Image:Lord Crull.jpg|250px|thumb|Yaaaay for da bloood gawd!]]
Oh, '''Crull'''. The [[Chaos Lord]] of [[Dawn of War|Winter Assault]] and the leader of a [[World Eaters]] Warband called the Blood Legion. Crull is noted for being quite arguably the third-most one-dimensional Chaos Lord in [[Dawn of War]]'s history, only barely edged out by Bale and Carron since he actually has something distantly resembling character development. Like every single Chaos Lord that isn't Araghast or Eliphas in the entire goddamned series, he's marked by awkward dialogue and hilariously easy-to-misinterpret quotes. He's one of the few Chaos Lords to use an Axe of Khorne, a Daemon Weapon from 4th Edition, [[Awesome|which cannot seem to decide if it wants to be an axe or a mace]].

In spite of his apparent violent demeanor, apparent bloodthirstiness and routine screaming of ''"[[Khorne|Blood for the Blood God]]!"'' Crull is not a terribly good Khornate. He has Sorcerers in his World Eaters warband (though he clearly doesn't like them) which makes the Blood God disappoint; his use of tactics also makes [[Abaddon]] look like [[Creed]], because said tactics require [[What|controlling an Imperial '''''Psyker''''' to brainwash guardsmen and sacrifice them.]] This tactic is not only cowardly, but also a shameful display to all Khonrnate followers and their belief of "my sledgehammer is mightier than your gun"

His lines are often over-the-top hammy and exceptionally obnoxious, since he says little that isn't a threat, curse, or epithet (the worst is when the Eldar attack in one level and repeats the same, very long, threat to them every, single, time, they attack), and even those lack enough creativity to even make them interesting. It's a fucking mystery how Crull was recruited in the World Eaters in the first place, although we can all agree that Angron is undoubtedly MOTHERFUCKING ANGRY that one of his sons has turned into such a pussy. Suffice to say, he comes across as an annoying shit who gets what he deserves when a much better character, [[Gorgutz]] da 'Ead Unter, <s>kicks</s> CURBSTOMPS da living shit out of him and takes his skull for a trophy, following Crull's attempt to ham-handedly try to double-cross the warboss on Lorn V. Points for at least getting killed by Gorgutz while trying for one last charge for glory before getting krumped, unlike Carron who ran away whining like a baby before <s>Gorgutz</s> VANCE STUBBS ripped his head off.

He's still better than Bale and Carron though. But absolute shit compared to the badassery of Araghast and Eliphas.

[[Eliphas the Inheritor]] can recover Crull's skull from Gorgutz' bosspole if he wins and use it to curry the Blood God's favor during the battle for Kronus, but this isn't canon given that Davian Thule wrecks his shit and he wound up in the warp for a while until [[Abaddon|a certain recipient of armlessness jokes]] decided to stop sulking for a few minutes and do something cool for a change and drag Eliphas' ass up out of the warp in [[Dawn of War II]].

Canonically though, Crull's skull was joined by Carron's skull as Gorgutz slaughtered another Chaos Lord of Khorne.

It's been rumored that Crull choose to follow Chaos (specifically Khorne) for the [[Adeptus Orthodontus|dental]], and judging by his teeth they're pretty good shape for a Chaos Lord, being remarkably clean in spite of being jagged and pointy. It is believed that he taught [[Cultist-chan]] the importance of good oral hygiene, a theory that arose when some of the Dawn of War players noticed a sound similar to gargling when he yells out some of his more famous speeches. Also the fact that, if you know your shit, it's funny to hear Nappa yelling these lines, and having shouting contests with Vegeta.

==A collection of Crull's funnier statements==
*[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZAfPGgzcOVY Yaaay for da blood gawd!]
*[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DliMrKCpeww From this world I shall conquer the next.....and the one after that!]
*[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_Pt8SGpEcj4 I've wanted for that miserable Ork's skull and I SHALL HAVE IT AS MY COCK!]
*[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IlfaYyS3gak The Titan is mgragaraiiine! Let destiny submit itself to my ambition! The universe will know the will of Khorne! Kremble.....KWWWUUUUEEEAYK!]

{{Template:Chaos-Marines}}
[[Category:Warhammer 40,000]][[Category:Chaos]][[Category:Space Marines]][[Category: Dawn of War]]

Wilderlands of High Fantasy

2020-10-23T23:31:20Z

2600:1700:19C0:2760:9585:A204:181C:FCEB: Undo revision 712718 by 87.205.245.208 (talk)

{{Oldschool}}
'''Wilderlands of High Fantasy''' is pretty much the first third-party [[Dungeons & Dragons Campaign Settings|Dungeons and Dragons campaign setting]] to ever come out, published in the late seventies by the venerable and back then extremely popular Judges Guild, the [[Old School Roleplaying|first]] of the [[Pathfinder|many]] [[Eberron|examples]] when someone else managed their work better than they themselves did. It began as a single-city setting called ''City-State of the Invincible Overlord'', but quickly grew out of those humble origins and ultimately swelled into a still fairly small land roughly the size of the Mediterranean (a deliberate design choice: this was noted as the amount of land an average [[Adventurer]] was ever likely to see).

Judges Guild thrived for some half a decade, producing awesome and popular settings and campaign modules, before its old-school attitudes and unwillingness to move on with [[Summer|the times]] led it going the way of the dodo. In 2002 it was picked up by Necromancer Games, publishing most of its content anew with updated 3e rules.

As of late, support for Judges Guild in the [[Grognard|old-school D&D community]] dried up faster than snatch in a convent after learning that the son of the setting's late creator (and current copyright-holder) Bob Bledsaw II, had been drinking heavily from the [[/pol/]] Kool-Aid — then using official Judges Guild social media to make a long-winded non-apology tour, only to expound his warped beliefs. Frog God Games, Necromancer Games and [[Dungeon_Crawl_Classics|Goodman Games]], who were publishing content for Judges Guild, quickly broke ties with the company. While overall opinion of the setting and the original Bob Bledsaw I — who is nothing like his son (and yes, the name thing is confusing with three generations of Roberts) — remains high with old-school players, with dedicated fans still playing it despite the controversy, the fans by and large have no stomach for what Bob Bledsaw II represents and are rightfully pissed at him for tarnishing Bob I's legacy.

==Setting==
[[File:Wilderlands world map.jpg|350px|right|thumb|The map of the Wilderlands.]]
This lands are dangerous and untamed, full of monsters and beasts and barbarians and evil humanoids, ruins of ancient kingdoms and empires and even evidence of interstellar visitations, with city-states ruled by cruel overlords scattered all around that clusterfuck and mostly keeping to themselves. Precisely one of those city-states, Viridistan, could claim itself to be anything even resembling a true nation, and even that's like the size of Belgium at most. A land in decline and facing a rebirth, it is a time of great change, when all creation stands in the crossroads - and it is here where the [[Player Character]]s are dropped, to leave their own mark in the history of the setting or even lead it towards the direction they would want.

In short, it was the original [[Nentir Vale|Points of Light]], and still one of the best to ever have come bearing that description.

You think [[Greyhawk]] peasants had it bad? Well, in Wilderlands your average peasants got a good twenty years of life expectancy, most likely ending your solitary and nasty life in a brutish way by the axe of a marauding beastman, or the dagger of a thief after your purse, or the plague. Just about everyone in charge is evil, law enforcement is too weak and incompetent to protect you (save for the secret police which everyone has and which is ''too'' competent), just about all roads are in shit conditions so you can't visit your cousin ten miles away without provoking bandits and monsters, and [[slavery]] is both legal and widespread so even your freedom wasn't a given. But if you were ''really'' smart or lucky, you could live to the ripe old age of thirty-five or so!

And yet if you've got the strength and the conviction for it, and a [[Adventurer|few friends to have your back]], you could march right up there and topple that asshole overlord and see if you could do better. Rebuild the whole damn ancient empires while you're there. It is the [[Noblebright|time of great change]], after all, and there are no [[Forgotten Realms|secret societies]] or other bullshit railroading you and telling you what to do.

It is also gonzo as hell, having been born in the time when scifi and fantasy were not clearly distinct, and gleefully embracing both into a weirdass pulp land where both [[Conan the Barbarian|Conan]] and Flash Gordon would be right at home. The land is littered with crashed spaceships - as mentioned up above - thanks to a prehistoric space war between two different alien coalitions, and amongst the standard fantasy races you've got folks like cavemen (riding mammoths!), amazons (with captive women doing all the menial work and men kept for [[Rape|reproduction]]), [[Furry|lion, cat,]] [[Awesome|hawk,]] and even [[What|chicken]] people, and it's not at all uncommon to bump into a perfectly normal human except with his skin [[Mutant|blue, red, green,]] or even entirely transparent.

The whole setting is split into eighteen different areas, each of which was in turn cut into five-mile hexes. This smallest map unit was then where most of the detailed setting information could be found: one hex could contain a city, while another had a lair of trolls. Some of the towns and cities were then detailed further, sometimes to the point of [[Awesome|just about every single building of every single street]]. From here, it'll be the DM's (or "judge's", as he was known) job to dump his players somewhere in there and watch as they pick a direction at random and begin a path of destruction through it all.

The eighteen areas, in the original publishing order, were as follows:

===City State of the Invincible Overlord===
The centerpoint of the entire setting - be it geographically, politically, historically, or spiritually - the titular '''City State of the Invincible Overlord''' was built by dwarves on top of an ancient ruined city... which itself was on top of [[Hive|another, even older ruin]]. Nowadays it is mostly ruled by humans, with the humble [[Emperor|Invincible Overlord]] himself in charge of everything, but the dwarves of the northern '''Thunderstone''' are still some of its most important allies. A bit further north there is the coastal city of '''Warwik''', founded a long time ago by some nobility that had the bright idea to [[Horus Heresy|try and usurp the City State rule]], and who were subsequently banished and are still plotting revenge.

'''Modron''' is another iconic city found here, on the shores of Roglaroon River and worshipping the river goddess of the same name. To the east there is the tiny village of '''Tegel''', entirely of no consequences if it weren't for the setting of one of the most well-loved Judges Guild adventures, ''Tegel Manor''. And in the southeastern corner you've got '''Ossary''', a fine example of what happens when you give a bunch of chaotic murderous vikings their own city: its ruling chiefs are basically in the state of total war, fighting in the streets.

[[Heresy|'''Witches' Court Marshes''']] is exactly what it says on the tin. Once every year, some four thousand witches gather here to summon demons and plot wicked things.

===The Barbarian Altanis===
Here's pretty much the geographical central point of Wilderlands, which is probably why it makes sense there's also way more ruins here than just about anywhere else, as well as little bits of nowadays completely nonfunctional roads. This is where once stood the ancient '''Dragon Empire''', ruled by some half-dragon folks called orichalcans, who unfortunately got their shit kicked in by their former slaves - the red-skinned altanians who now live here. The orichalcans got [[Exterminatus|basically genocided]], and there are now very few of them running around and nobody likes them.

There's a mountain range going through the middle, and it splits the area into several different weather zones: you've got hot, and slightly less hot. The nomadic altanian folks run around this place, but a few of them threw their lot in with the Invincible Overlord and settled down, and are known as the '''Traitor Barons'''. There are also elves here, in their ancient and venerable cities of '''Actun''' and others, as well as some human clans of '''Antil''' who really don't like women.

===Valley of the Ancients===
Land of the dragon graveyards, the ancient aliens, and the real weird gonzo shit. There are no great big city-states here because there aren't enough people mad enough to want to live in this hellhole - the only place to get even close, '''Tarsh''', is a pretty piddly place when compared to Viridistan or something. The titular '''Valley of the Ancients''' is the site of an ancient dragon empire, now littered with draconic ruins, with the grand price - the palace of the dragon emperor - never having been found.

The vast '''Glow Worm Steppes''' are named after the [[Xenos|gigantic glowing worms]] everyone knows are hunting here - but that're actually torch-wielding caveman hunting parties. Tricksy cavemen. The Dar Undine Desert is the hottest and driest land anywhere in the Wilderlands, even more so than the western great desert, but the edges get monsoon rains and windstorms every once in a while because of [[Gork|two gods]] [[Mork|in a constant struggle]] [[Awesome|over supremacy of these lands]]. Like, how cool is that?

===Tarantis===
The pirate land, nominally governed by the city-state of '''Tarantis''', and the Tarantine Merchant's Association therein. They do a pretty lousy job with that. Just about all the city states and provinces around are ruled by sultans also in Tarantis's pocket. The ruined capital of the ancient kingdom '''Kelnore''' lies basically in the opposite end of the bay where Tarantis is put on: the place basically blew up and burned down the last time it was sacked, and it's said demons and shit still inhabit it. Much of the land is a hot and dry desert, inhabited by bandits and nomads and bandit-nomads.

This is where you go if you want to set off to the far-away (as in, outside the maps entirely) kingdom of '''Karak'''.

===Valon===
The area directly north of City State, '''Valon''' is named after the house of avalonian ice wizards, the second capital of magic in the setting, and masters of the weather and the sea. Most of the map is filled up by pirate-infested sea, or mountains full of lost dwarven cities, the greatest of them probably the fabled '''Krazandol'''. Two rival wizards are trying to make two separate [[golem]] armies: one has [[Fail|almost completed an]] iron golem, the other cut some corners and is making regular flesh golems with some armor slapped on. Once, '''Sotur''' was the northernmost capital of the Orichalan Dragon Empire. Nowadays it is not only filled with demons and shit, but anyone even stepping inside risks catching [[Nurgle|a rotting plague]].

Overall, aside from Valon itself, the region is generally considered a [[Death World|pretty nasty place to live]].

===Viridistan===
Also known as the City State of the Immortal Emperor, along with many other equally-humble names, '''Viridistan''' is ruled by Green Emperor - and that ain't no empty title, because the guy and his wife are [[Star Trek|literally green]], said to be the last of the ancient and powerful race of True Viridians. The rest of the kingdom's inhabitants tend towards lighter shades. They are trying to create a true new kingdom to the area, but it hasn't gone on for very long yet so the land is still as untamed as anywhere else. The depths of the Trident Gulf also hold the mermaid kingdom of '''Sae Laamer'''.

There are great many [[Tanar'ri|demons]] running around, likely because an earlier emperor made some unknown deal with Demogorgon in order to get him around to ''personally beat the shit out of some invading City-State chucklefucks''. Not wanting to be outdone (although it really is hard to top that), the current emperor has a bunch of disguised succubi and mariliths in high positions. He's been going [[Call of Cthulhu|insane]] in the later years, which may or may not be related.

===Desert Lands===
The much-travelled crossroads between the lands of north and south, this area has something extremely useful and surprisingly rare in this setting: actual fucking roads. You don't need to traverse the wilderness and get lost and shit, although there are still bandits and monsters preying on it so don't get too excited. It is also the site of the '''Holy cities''', five desert cities on the entrance to bigass underground caves full of mushrooms and lakes, sacred to the faith of Mycr. Unfortunately, the current asshole [[Emperor]] of Viridistan really doesn't like Mycr, and has spent his 150-year rule persecuting them. Even now his forces have occupied several of the cities.

Despite being at the crossroads, there's no city-state here. Even the Holy Cities, the mecca for a whole religion, are pretty tiny and slummy. Blame Viridistan.

===Sea of Five Winds===

The vast empty of the '''Sea of Five Winds''' is the true buffer between the ''Demon Lands'' of the '''Ament Tundra''' to the South, and the '''Desert Lands''' of the ''Five Holy Cities'' to the North, Still packs of Demons and Demonspawn can be found roaming in the wilderness here, especially in the dank dark forests of the coastal lowlands, and in the canyons, caves, caverns, mines, and lost pyramidal tombs riddling the periphery of the enormous plateau located in the West. True to it's name, more than two-thirds of this area is open ocean or high seas notable for pirates, and with highly unpredictable weather.

Rich with game and wildlife the forested coastal lowlands along Western shore and with the many fresh and clear streams and rivers that cut inland toward the great escarpment, the coast of the Sea of Five Winds was once, long ago the center of all of the ancient ''Sea Kingdoms'' of the ''Wilderlands''. Lost cities, treasures, and shipwrecks are scattered all along the coast, just waiting for brave adventurers who are willing to test their mettle.

Some notable towns here include '''Tlan''', a seaport and trading village located about halfway down the coast, just keep an eye out for the thieves guild here! '''Elveskeep''', located high up on the Escarpment overlooking ''Brinth Falls'', a great waterfall that tumbles down more than 900 feet off the escarpment into the most beautiful and azure set of cascading pools. '''Elveskeep''' is of course, known for the Halflings that make up 99% of the entire population, and they are famous throughout the Wilderlands for their rich pungent and potent pipeweed. Where the Elves do live here, is high up along the walls of ''Vastem Canyon'' along the escarpment in a town named '''Serpeant-Tail''', named after the canyon that the town was built in, of course. High up on the escarpment they have dug into the rocky walls of the canyon, and the entire town is suspended on the side of the cliff overlooking the coastal lowlands with miles of tunnels that lead deep into the plateau to many a mine, forgotten dungeons, and wet dark caverns.

===Elphand Lands===
If you're looking for all that Lost World stuff, this is where you'll want to go, right to the northwestern edge of the maps. They've got cavemen, dinosaurs, mammoths, saber-toothed tigers, amazons (sometimes riding those saber-toothed tigers), the biggest and most unexplored forest in the entire setting, mountains full of giants and hawkmen, and three moronic tribal leader brothers trying to assemble a mighty magical staff left behind by their much wiser father - obviously by killing off the other two brothers or stealing their staff piece.

Not much civilization, though: there's a few towns and fortresses that're lucky if they're past iron age, plus the ancient trading city of '''Damkina''' in the middle of a lake. It has been standing there unconquered for thousands of years because it doesn't even bother to defend itself: anyone's that got stuff to trade can come in and trade that shit.

===Lenap===

Located in the ''Fantastic Wilderlands Beyonde''. One of the most diverse of the Wilderlands campaign settings, with a wide mix of alignments and races, featuring scattered hamlets and towns of Men, Dwarves, Elves, Half-Elves, Ogres, and Goblins sandwiched between the ''Desert Lands'' and ''Five Holy Cities'', with all the nomadic Dervish tribes located in the dry lands to the Northwest, and the pirate infested ''Sea of Five Winds'' to the South, ''Lenap'' is a backwater of petty lords and kingdoms just waiting for the one true conqueror to roll through.

Along the coast one will find find schools of Mermen and Mermaids, sunken cities, and in the vast wilderness, the burial mounds of long forgotten ancient steppe kings. Dragons roam freely here, and there are a host of islands off the coast, where marooned pirates, cannibals, primitive cave people, and dark magic await any that are brave enough to venture near.

One of the more interesting towns happens to be '''Valeyard''', located off the coast fairly close to the island of '''Lenap'''. Both towns are pirate havens with large slave trading markets, with merchants, traders, and pirates all eager to unload their ill-gotten gains. Bring Rum!

===Ghinor===
The namesake of this area, the Ghinoran Successor States, split up from the [[Roman Empire|ancient Kelnore]] when that shit started to [[Age of Strife|fall apart in its decadence]], and continued on living and occasionally even thriving for a long time after their parent kingdom went down, though they never did do as well as London or Holy Roman Empire in the real world did. Here, for instance, the major city-state of '''Chim''' got long since abandoned and replaced by a bunch of dwarves.

Jungles full of monsters and cannibals surround the few little towns and villages here, and the seas are little better: they're windy and stormy and full of strange and unpredictable currents, with hundreds of ''really'' weird islands scattered alongside, their magical shit ranging from colors, agelessness, emotion-powered winds, gravity revelsals, and lots and lots of undead, just to name a few. Along the eastern coast, colonies of ''Skandik'' sea raiders.

===Isles of the Blest===
Once the southern half of the great and mighty Dragon Empire, of the people of Oricha, nowadays just about nobody lives around here, save a few coastal villages. Plenty of sea traffic, though: all the ships to or from Viridistan pass through this way, circling across the entire damn peninsula so that people wouldn't need to brave the wilderlands on foot. There are even a bunch of portals scattered in the sea that can take a traveler right off to Tarantis. The Lake of the Gods was one of the few modern pockets left after the [[Age of Strife|Uttermost War]], and is said to contain a portal to the elemental plane of water.

The elves living here are surprisingly kickass: centered in the town of '''Ludgates''', they've gone around and starting wars and killing and enslaving humans and shit.

===Ebony Coast===
Probably named after all that oil found in here, Ebony Coast is one of the nicest and the most peaceful lands in the entire setting - which isn't saying a whole lot, but still. There are plenty of farms and countryside manors and the roads are actually patrolled! It's a crossroad with a whole lot of folks from all across the land, even the eastern Karak maintaining some outposts, and the Blackwell Isle to the west is a popular visiting place for tourists, mercenaries, and adventurers.

'''Revelshire''' is the biggest and most prosperous city in the region, a tree-city built by elves to protect a treant. Then a bunch of human traders began to show up and inhabit the place and now humans and half-elves greatly outnumber the natives. Should've [[Exterminatus|gassed the bastards]] when they first started to show up.

===Ament Tundra===
How can it be a tundra when it's this far south?

That's a really good question, and [[Alpha Legion|nobody fucking knows]]. Probably got something to do with the [[Eye of Terror|Demon Empires]] to the south. Either way, there it is: the titular tundra is a possibly magical plain of inhospitable cold, around which few people live that aren't altanian nomads or, strangely, halflings. To the west there are vast forests and gigantic mountain ranges, that keep the [[Awesome|Demi-Giants]] well away.

===Isles of the Dawn===
Many old legends say that this was from where Apollo rose to the sky each morning, with the sun - hence the name. There are many shrines for him in this peaceful fisherman's paradise, along with whalers, traders from Karak (which is right to the east), fortresses maintained by the kingdom of Rallu, more than one sunken wizard's tower, sex-starved orcs trapped on an island due to a magical mishap, and nothing to eat but cabbage. The closest thing to a central authority is the port-market village of '''Dragonscar'''.

===Southern Reaches===

Located in the extreme Southeast portion of the Wilderlands the oceans and coasts of the '''Southern Reaches''' see frequent ''Skandik'' sea raider incursions. There are lots of Dwarves and Men, and some Orcs, and a scattering of Elves and Half-Elves. Among the usual scattering of shipwrecks and submerged palaces, there are abundant crumbling castles, wasted ruins, and abandoned strongholds that were once the homes of Men and Dwarves. While the mostly neutral and good population have defeated and driven off the Demon Hordes, occasionally small groups, and individual demons can be found hunting in the wilderness. Darkness and horror await adventurers that delve too deep into the ancient earth here so close to the ''Demon Wastes''. Dire Wolves, Werewolves, and Bears can be commonly found above ground, roaming the wild lands.

A few of the notable villages here include '''Silverhall''', a Dwarven mining town that features the mother lode of, ...you guessed it, Silver Mines! '''Dragonsaddle''', another Dwarven village which overlooks ''Orc Bait Pass'' high up on the escarpment above the coastal lowlands and protecting Silverhall. '''Khallordain''', a great subterranean ''Dwarven Hall'', noted for it's beautiful cavern waterfalls, and rich iron deposits overlooking the ''Pass of the Sighing Stones'' and protecting the Northern approach to the Dwarven Highlands. '''Fairwatch''', the town of Men on the plains, loaded with claims, prospectors, and deep gold mines. There is also '''Sacred Rock''', an Elven community of shipwrights located near ''Silvership Castle'' along the ''Goldcham Estuary'' on the coast of ''the Sea of Five Winds''. Even the Skandiks stay away from the fanatical elves here who will ''Fock them right up!'' if they dare to raid anywhere near here. Yes, the elven ships are expensive, however they are of the very best quality, and yes, you can get a giant swan ship, if'n you like.

===Silver Skein Isles===
A land of constant war, both the [[Heresy|holy]] and the naval sort. The former is mainly carried out covertly, by assassinations and blackmail and such: the titular isles have gone [[Rage|a bit upset]] ever since a priest of Poseidon called Kanamant decided to purge his home island of all nonbelievers and, by means of a pretty vague and shaky claim, take over the entire Silver Skein as well. This all pretty quickly collapsed the normally relatively peaceful and friendly isles into one gigantic [[Age of Apostasy|religious clusterfuck]].

One of the islands has a gateway to the [[Hades|underworld]]. What fun.

Meanwhile, this region is the site where both of the two largest, most powerful, and most influential cities anywhere south of Tarantis - and mind you, that's a lot of south - are located, with nothing but a a bit of sea between them. Naturally, they're at constant war. '''Rallu''' is a land of sailors and pirates, its location secret to everybody until recently, when one of its rulers had the bright idea to reveal this secret to the world. Why he did that, no one would ever know - it could be he had a perfectly good reason for it and was about to lead the city into a new golden age, but then he got assassinated so none of that ever really worked out for him. To the south, there's the great magical city of '''Tula''', a land of sorcerers and demons and monsters, all walking down the street perfectly nicely like it wasn't a big deal at all. To the northern lands, this city is a legend. Unfortunately, while its magic is unsurpassed, its naval force is [[Rape|just a bit weaker]] than that of a goddamn pirate city, which is why it's been slowly but steadily losing the war.

===Ghinor Highlands===

The '''Ghinor Highlands''' is about as close as one can get to being in the ''Demon Wastes'', without actually being in the ''Demon Empire.'' Your average adventurer, of course, won't be able to tell the difference. Also, this is almost exactly opposite of the lands to the west. Just to the West, ''the Ament Tundra is where hell froze over''. Here in the ''Ghinor Highlands you are just two steps from Hell'', Really, there are steaming broken mountains,and active spewing volcanoes, and very hot, hot pits. Most of the Mountains have the word ''Doom'' in their name here. Even the lakes share that feature often having the word ''Doom'' somewhere in their name, or ''Shadow''. You'll find the ''Legions Gate'' here, and ''Bloodseep'', and along the northern borders, the hot and very steamy SCREAMING HYENA JUNGLE. There is a plentitude of fetid and dismal marshes, some springing right of of the great Southern escarpment, leeching oozes, and all manner of foul creatures, which in the darkness of the warm nights here, swarm the land.

The Dwarves like it here though, this is where the forges are hot, and there are lots of gems. They also enjoy hunting, and killing demons, just for sport. Of course, you'll find Gryphons and Hellhounds here, and all manner of Dragons, especially fiery Dragons. There are many villages and hamlets here where the men are bound into slavery, and servitude, and committing evil acts. There are also lots of elves and mages and clerics, committed to pushing back the Demons wherever they are found. This a a land of perpetual wars of darkness against light, and light against darkness. No rest for the wicked, or the good.

Some of the more notable towns in the region include '''Bramly''', an Elven town noted for it's flaming wines, and '''Elmwood''', a refuge in a quiet forest, a town of Halflings. In the town of '''Ten Elms''', you'll find ten score elves, led by a Ranger, fighting evil. '''Dristhane''' and '''Mist''' are two Dwarven fortresses, on the lake shore just a days ride from the demon spawn of the ''OVERDOOM'' mountains. Guarding the plains approach to ''Mist'' and ''Dristhane'' is '''Nurenthane''', ''the city of Marble and Men''.

===Other Lands===
Seeing how the setting's pretty tiny it occasionally makes references to places out of the map. Three of these are of some real importance. The kingdom of '''Karak''' to the east is old, far more ancient than even the oldest true kingdom in Wilderlands (Kelnore), and basically fantasy India with bits of China and Mongols mixed in. It has powerful horse armies and navy, and sees wilderlands as a bunch of barbarians to be exiled into. '''The Great Glacier''', north of Valon, is one big chunk of ice age, incredibly expansive and basically impossible to cross, though there are stories of other kingdoms beyond it. The ice wizards of Valon have hidden schools here. Finally, far to the south there's the '''Demon Empires''', a mighty empire split in two and constantly raiding the northern lands - though far less in the last hundred years, whatever the reason. There are demons and fire elementals here, and the whole thing started as a breeding project by fucking [[Xenos|aliens]].

==History==

There were aliens.

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