2d4chan - User contributions [en]

Macha

2020-10-27T10:38:13Z

2600:1700:8C93:3110:8DA8:8C97:678E:31C8:

{{Promotions}}
{{Heresy}}
[[Image:Machadow3.jpg|thumb|600px|Go bring up her virginity to her face, I dare you.]]
Not to be confused with [[Mecha]].

<s>Mocha</s> '''Macha''' is an [[Eldar]] Farseer from [[Dawn of War]] infamous for being a 4000+ year-old virgin. Like [[Taldeer]], she's another daughter of [[Eldrad]] (as far as [[/tg/]] canon is concerned). Usually depicted to be mostly reasonable, outside of relationship matters where she falls into a self pitying, whiny wreck concerning her virginity. Fa/tg/uys masturbate furiously to pictures of her naked (many of which can be seen below). She can be distinguished from other Eldar by her cheek lines and red hair.

Later developments brought about the theory that Macha is destined to be with the [[Emprah]], but due to Eldrad dickery these two will continue being a virgin and comatose corpse-god, respectively. There are also conflicting opinions on whether Macha is actually saving herself for the Emperor and choosing to be a virgin, or if she is simply extremely unlucky and is constantly frustrated as to why she fails to get laid when her body is the hottest piece of ass this grimdark universe has ever seen. For a while, she died, no thanks to [[C.S. Goto]], but she got better (she was only a little dead).

Macha has had anal sex(or futanari sex), frequently in fact, but it has always been with a Callidus Assassin masquerading as someone or another. While initially traumatizing for her, Macha has accepted this fact and views the unnamed Callidus as her sort-of girlfriend. Whether this makes Macha bisexual or not (considering that the Callidus always takes male form when they interact(or is actually a hermephadite)) is up for debate. Rumors of her getting laid for real with a mon'keigh fuckbuddy of hers have yet to be confirmed or denied, as the people who try to bring it up keep getting a Singing Spear jammed into their eye sockets. Often drawn by [[Drawfag|Chink]] before he left /tg/ for [[/v/|Skullgirls]].

She'll be returning in [[Dawn of War III]]. Hilariously enough, her unmasked appearance is exactly the same as what /tg/ has always depicted her looking like, right down to the cheek lines and red hair. This has lead to some theories as to this design choice:

#The Designers are total fa/tg/uys and read this wiki and the boards
#The Designers want to appease 40k fans by throwing a little fanservice their way
#The character designer for Macha was a new guy who went looking for character references and didn't realize that all the drawings were just fanon interpretations

The meme about her being a perpetual virgin is rather ironic given that she shares a name with a [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Macha Celtic goddess] of, among other things, fertility (but it's not like virginity was not a custom in Celtic culture).

Oh fuck, [[If the Emperor had a Text-to-Speech Device|What]] [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hWDTuxeZrIc| did you do...]

==Dawn of War ==
During the events of the original game, Macha leads a warhost of Biel-Tan Eldar on the planet [[Tartarus]]. Their mission was to safeguard an ancient artifact known as the "Maledictum", which contained a powerful greater daemon of Khorne that the Eldar had imprisoned millenia ago. When the Forces of Chaos arrived on Tartarus with the intention of obtaining the artifact, Macha lead her forces to ensure that they would not succeed. Though because of the Eldar's legendary arrogance and seeing themselves as the only ones capable of handling the situation, rather than explaining themselves to the imperials and maybe trying to ally with them, Macha led the warhost against the imperial forces and engaged in a bloody conflict with Captain Gabriel Angelos of the Blood Ravens that ultimately led to the Eldar's defeat and greatly weakening their forces. Since engaging nearly a whole chapter of warriors capable of devastating Craftworlds was somehow a bad idea. Who would've thought? Her mistake is compounded by the common knowledge that the Imperium basically is an anti-Chaos, daemon-slaying warmachine and so is very much far more capable of sealing away the Maledictum or outright destroying the daemon within than even the Eldar have ever been.

Macha was then confronted by Angelos and his Librarian friend Isador near the dig site which held the key to the Maledictum, and pleaded with them to bury the key. However the Chaos Sorcerer Sindri appeared and quickly took the key before teleporting away. Macha then told Angelos that if he wanted more answers, then he should ask Inquistor Toth as she states that he knows more than he lets on. Before she left, she informed Angelos of where the Forces of Chaos were entrenched while also blaming him for weakening the Biel-Tan warhost (conveniently forgetting the conflict between the Eldar and the Blood Ravens was partly her fault if not more).

She and the Eldar forces appear again during the final mission where they allied with the Blood Ravens against the Alpha Legion and Sindri, who had ascended into a Daemon Prince. After Sindri got his ugly face smashed thanks to Angelos and his newly acquired daemon-hammer, both the Space Marines and Eldar got a hold of the Maledictum. Macha implored Gabriel to not destroy the stone, but rather than straight out saying that destroying it would release the daemon, she just vaguely said that he knows little of what he is doing before ordering her forces to open fire on the imperials (thereby encouraging Gabriel not to heed her). Gabriel proceeded to destroy the Maledictum, causing the Eldar to flee and Macha cursing him that his action has doomed them all. Stupidly forgetting that she was speaking to a super-daemon killer fully capable of killing whatever was unleashed.

After that, she hasn't been seen since. Until.....

==Dawn of War III==
Macha returns after more than a decade since the first game. She serves under the command of Lord Kyre who seeks to obtain the Spear of Khaine, located on Acheron, the wandering world. She is still tsundere for Gabriel as when she receives orders to kill him for mucking up with Kyre's plans, she refuses. In the end she teams up with Angelos [[wat|and Gorgutz]] to stop the chaotic threat. Her whole reason for being there originally, though, was to try to destroy the Blood Ravens and personally kill Gabriel as she blames the Chapter for weakening her warhost and she holds Gabriel personally responsible for the release of the daemon. Even though literally all of those things were direct and extremely obvious results of ''her'' actions.

==Stories Featuring Macha==
* [[Imber]]
* [[The Ever Virgin]]
* [[Macha's Vacation]]
* [[Chris Orksen]], Macha gets vanned for trying to pedo-sex human male children.
* [[Macha writes a fapfic]] - Macha accidentally frees the Star Child from the Warp. It seems some writefag did a whole overhaul of the fapfic, now it's even more heretical and NSFW. YAY!
* [[The Final Saga of Macha the Ever-Virgin: Extra Large Heresy]] - Sometimes miracles really do happen. (Even more NSFW)

==See Also==
* [[Caerys]], another farseer
* [[Gabriel Angelos]], an old crush of Macha's, although he was chem-gelded (which made bedding him out of the question). However, there are rumours that the reason he did not bed her was because he is gay[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZRuXt2lIp3U]. Other rumors say that they ''did'' bed one another, but they had to call it off for fear of inquisitorial purging.
* [[Callidus]], Macha's stalker that keeps tricking her into thinking she's getting it on with a guy... EVERYDAY. And she falls for it... EVERY TIME.

==Links==

"W" Artel is now making a Mini: https://www.google.com/search?biw=1680&bih=931&tbm=isch&sa=1&q=Warseer+by+Artel&oq=Warseer+by+Artel&gs_l=psy-ab.3...21943.21943.0.22478.1.1.0.0.0.0.127.127.0j1.1.0....0...1.1.64.psy-ab..0.0.0.sHqf0TJ3gPM#imgrc=_&spf=1505318399054

== Gallery ==

{{Promotions}}
<gallery>
Image:Macha NSFW.jpg
Image:Macha_9.png
Image:Macha_5.jpg
Image:Elite_Beat_Eldar_Divas_by_IronShrineMaiden.jpg
Image:Macha_1.png
Image:One just for the fatguys by Mr Culexus.jpg
Image:Macha_2.png
Image:Interruption by Chink.jpg
Image:Macha_6.jpg
Image:Macha_7.png
Image:Macha_8.png
Image:Macha_10.png
Image:MACHA_IS_MY_FAV_by_eccma417.jpg
Image:MACHA_MACHA_by_eccma417.jpg
Image:Meet_the_Focker_Eldrad_by_IronShrineMaiden.jpg
Image:A_curious_love.gif
Image:Pancawks1.png
Image:MachaBummedOut.png
Image:MachaDiary.jpg
Image:Machataldeerfight.jpg
Image:Macha aid.png
Image:Macha ass.jpg
Image:Macha_Scum.png
Image:1224319230025.png
Image:Macha_Hmm.jpg
Image:Macha_Baw_by_IronShrineMaiden.jpg
Image:1363033022950.jpg
Image:Macha_GRIMDARK.jpg
Image:Macha 1.jpg
Image:ItsMachaTime!.jpg|You better BELIEVE IT.
Image:Heretical Daydreams.jpg| Heresy is in the air!
Image:Macha_11.jpg|She's our favorite Sexy Loser
Image:1228597397940.jpg|Macha encounters the faptau
Image:Ishadamnitmacha.jpg|Macha while writing her fap-fic
Image:Sugar.png| Macha and Callidus Wife sharing a tender moment
Image:Machacalunf.jpg| This would be cute if Macha wasn't +4 STR
Image:MachaVisitsCWCVille.jpg| Macha meets [[Chris-Chan]].
Image:Macha and Gabe.jpg| The man who opened her wraithbone.
Image:Machaplus4.png| Plus Four Str Macha arriving home after a long days work
Image:1386533014791.jpg|Macha has learned to mix sex with violence in her more recent shlickfics. The results are undeniable.
Image:Mon Keigh Fucker.jpg|The irony fairy must be laughing its ass off right now, given some of Macha's more recent antics.
Image:MACHA_X_BIG_E.jpg|This pic has Macha, boobs, whiskey, porno, heresy, a natural twenty, xenos love, the Emperor, a fallen paladin of sorts, chainmail on the armor on the floor, and -4 STR. The Emperor himself knows not what to make of this.
Image:Macha lewd.jpg
Image:Macha cute.png
Image:Glorious HD Macha.jpg|Fucking zap
Image:Macha_doll.jpeg|Spending time with the Emperor
Image:Happymacha by sexual yeti-da1lfvd.jpg|Bewbs
Image:Warhammer_girls_by_hotgum-db17k0n.jpg|Hanging out with Miriael, Lelith and Celestine
Image:Gabriel and macha.PNG|They've hooked back up.
Image:Gabriel x Macha.jpg| Finally, after 13 years.
</gallery>

== Links ==

"W" Artel is now making a Mini: https://www.google.com/search?biw=1680&bih=931&tbm=isch&sa=1&q=Warseer+by+Artel&oq=Warseer+by+Artel&gs_l=psy-ab.3...21943.21943.0.22478.1.1.0.0.0.0.127.127.0j1.1.0....0...1.1.64.psy-ab..0.0.0.sHqf0TJ3gPM#imgrc=_&spf=1505318399054

[[Category: Warhammer 40,000]]

[[Category: Dawn of War]]

[[Category: Xenos]]

[[Category: Eldar]]

[[Category: Craftworld Eldar]]

{{Eldar-Characters}}

Vance Motherfucking Stubbs

2020-10-27T10:28:49Z

2600:1700:8C93:3110:8DA8:8C97:678E:31C8:

{{Awesome}}
{{cleanup}}
[[Image:VanceMFStubbs.png|450px|thumb|right|The motherfucker himself.]]
{{topquote|I am not afraid of an army of lions led by a sheep. I am afraid of an army of sheep led by a Lion.|Alexander the Great}}

He's '''Vance. Motherfucking. Stubbs.''' An [[Imperial Guard]] general and total badass from [[Dawn_of_War#Soulstorm|Dawn of War: Soulstorm]] and the only character introduced in the expansion anyone unironically likes, despite having arguably the worst voice actor (his performance is just bad, and not with enough ENGRISH or ham to be unintentionally funny like Boreale or Carron). This is mostly because his competition is a Necron Lord with some of the most obnoxious robo-mummy asthma ever who clearly wants to be as cool as Thomas Maccabee but isn't, the wussiest Khornate lord to have ever disgraced the Blood God, a bald brother genericus with a dumb accent, a Cannoness whose entire personality is "is a Sister of Battle", a Farseer with an especially annoying high pitched voice that makes her sound like she's actually two preteen Eldar girls with one sitting on the other's shoulders so they can pretend to be an adult like [[Girls und Panzer|some cartoon,]] a painfully generic Archon with a stupid hat, and "I can't believe it's not Shas'O'Kais" but with the added tendency to go into melodrama of a bad anime protagonist. He's the most badass Governor General....ever....well maybe at tie with [[General Sturnn]] who's equally awesome, but wasn't a governor.

No, you cannot say his name without Motherfucking in the middle.

==About the Motherfucker==
Vance Motherfucking Stubbs leads the 252nd Kaurava Conservator Regiment for the Imperial Guard in the game. He is armed (apparently like every other Command Squad leader in the Galaxy) with a set of Power Claws and a Bolter strapped to his arm. He may also, in fact, have a Thunder Hammer for a penis, but his harem of lovers were all too exhausted to comment on the matter.

The entire Imperial Guard campaign featuring him is sheer [[AWESOME]]. When the player chooses to play as the Imperial Guard in Soulstorm, then it is written in the army selection menu that Stubbs recently transferred before the Kaurava Hijinks that resulted in nearly every single force to appear in the [[Kaurava System]]. The Guard, like any player controlled army, starts with one region (in the Guard's case is the Dussala Precinct). Mind you, compared to the other forces that come to the system, the 252nd Conservator Regiment is at that time underpowered, with low morale and simply sucks. Stubbs therefore whips them with sheer manliness (and a series of reforms) turning the 252nd back into a fighting force that shouldn't be trifled with and proceeds to <s>re-conquer the system one region at a time</s> Lose to '''DA ORKZ'''. With the release of DoW3, it has been confirmed that the Orkz under Gorgutz 'Ead 'Unter were the canonical victor. Yes, we're not quite sure what happened either. '''WUT 'APPENED? WE IS ORKS AND YOU IS NOT, UMMIE, DAT'S WUT 'APPENED!'''

[[File:ORKZ ARE DA BEST.png|300px|thumb|right|Despite Stubb's best efforts, Orkz snatched the victory. Why? 'CAUSE ORKZ ARE DA BEST]]
If the Guard is victorious in the conflict, then the system is revitalized as Stubbs commissions multiple projects that rebuilds the worlds and improves their industrial capabilities. Additionally the planets become militarized due to the large number of newly constructed military academies that produce superior regiments that are second only to the Kasrkins trained at [[Cadia|Cadia's]] Kasrs (a impressive feat considering that Kasrkins are elite even by Tempestus Scions/Storm Trooper standards).

The Emperor protects indeed.

Worth mentioning is the attack on the [[Ecclesiarchy]] controlled Sama District. Stubbs knew well that it didn't matter how much he and his men would make amends, the Regiment would never be free from being suspected by the Sisters, as the Warpstorm over Kaurava IV happened on Vance's watch. Not to mention that even if they did repent, the Sisters of Battle of the Order of The Sacred Rose would make them do so with excessive amounts of flamers and purging. Vance had no other option in this case. Stubbs refused any of these accusations and thought himself and his men not responsible for the whole mess, thus he did something that was crazy enough to work...mainly to march into the Sama District in full-force and simply conquer the place. And if the Guardsmen are victorious, then Vance will utter a speech that the Emperor was with the Conservators this day.

==The whole losing 100 Baneblades thing==
When facing the Imperial Guard at their stronghold in Dawn of War: Soulstorm, Stubbs' Commissar informs him that all 100 of the [[Baneblade|Baneblades]] that would have been available to defend had just been sent off to help the Imperial Guard elsewhere in the Kaurava system, and any more Baneblades that are needed will have to be constructed via a series of pieces sent out by supply Rhinos. This absurdity of simply "losing" 100 Baneblades has spawned a number of jokes amongst players, mostly associating him with being "Tactically incompetent" as opposed to [[Creed]]'s "Tactical Genius". (Speaking of tactical genius it may be worth mentioning that shortly after this incident Abaddon was run over by a column of Baneblades he found stuffed in his mailbox) Also it can be disregarded as Chaos Propaganda started by <s>[[Alpha Legion|Alpha Legion Chaos Marines]]</s> {{BLAM|*BLAM!!!*}} [[Chaos Space Marines| THOSE CHAOS SPACE MARINES]] THAT DO NOT EXIST!!

However, there have been rumors that the Baneblades never left, but they were hidden by [[Creed]], or perhaps taken by the [[Blood Ravens |Blood Magpies]] ( [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LNK5-uE5JFg| IT IS THE BAAAAAAANNNNEEBLAAAAAAADEEE] ). Adding on top of this, Baneblades are supposed to be rare (with three per regiment being the average), made only at major Forge Worlds. Fortunately for the Imperium, the in-game background for Stubbs's Baneblades is that the invasions and mass destruction miraculously uncovered the rather terrifying (for the enemy) fact that at least half of the entire supercontinent city of Kaurava I is in fact built on top of a continent-sized manufactorum, probably from the Great Crusade, devoted to the mass-production of Baneblades.

This enabled Stubbs to roll out more Baneblades in a month than Forge Worlds (individually, of course) produce in a century. Best of all, the fact you can build more manufactorums in-game suggests that the Mechanicus could probably mass-produce the ''factories'', too. With the pacified Tomb World nearby to draw in the Mechanicus plus the carrot Stubbs now has with the Baneblades and whatever other STC data uncovered (maybe Fellblades and other awesome stuff?), along with Stubbs's clear care for the little people, it is likely he could convince/trade for the Tomb World being studied and Forgeworld-ified by various important Forge Worlds, giving him access to their unique data (such as Executioners and Vanquisher cannons). Sure, the individual Forge Worlds never share anything, but then, none of them have had the technological buffet on a scale Vance does to bargain with. That, and he doesn't seem the sort to give a crap about keeping tech to himself. Then he can happily send copies to every Forge World if he can pay captains to visit. Then the Imperium wins by default. Regardless, Vance Motherfucking Stubbs is seen as one of the most awesome Imperial Guard generals because of his calm, stern voice, even when his army is on the brink of defeat.

<s>Relic never bothered to announce who actually canonically won the Kaurava conflict</s> Scratch that; Orkz were the victors, see above. - only that it sure as the [[Warp]] wasn't the Space Marines. Hence, many players simply accepted the fact that Stubbs won the war because of his utter badassery that no other character was able to posses. And also the rumors that he found the 100 Baneblades again and used his variation [[Creed|taktikul jinyas]] to deep strike said Baneblades into the main bases of armies. We would have said [[Indrick Boreale]] was the canon winner of the Kaurava conflict - if only he didn't screw it up by canonically losing horribly.

Alas, as it turns out he wasn't quite badass enough to stand up to Gorgutz' WAAAGH, which was able to defeat him and force him to retreat from Kaurava. Given the fact that Gorgutz got bored and left the Kaurava system for Acheron some time afterward, one can only hope Stubbs took advantage of the ensuing Ork civil war to reclaim the system, just as he swore he would.

But at least we know what happened to the 100 Baneblades: Gorgutz krumped them.

==Badass Facts(joke memes is more like it)==
[[File:Relic00014.jpg|450px|thumbnail|right|What really happened to Carron that day. (Yes, the giblet on the ground is in fact his spleen! Why is it on the ground, he may or may not have shat it out.)]]
What is truly stunning about Vance Motherfucking Stubbs is the intense humanity he exhibits; whilst almost every commander in Soulstorm was poorly developed or simply [[Firaeveus Carron|pants-on-head retarded]], Stubbs was [[Fist of the North Star|comparatively sympathetic]] - determined to win back his regiment's good name in the eyes of the Emperor and who strove to make sure the sacrifices of his men weren't for nothing, and was determined to restore honour to his unit, heedless of what heretical scum would stand in their way. He shows manly [[Rage|rage]] at the tortures the [[Dark Eldar]] subjected captured soldiers to, and unlike Aleksander, who panicked in [[Dawn of War|Dark Crusade]] when Eliphas sent him telepathic messages, Stubbs gritted his teeth and shrugged it off, spurring his men onwards towards their objective in an effort to shove a formation of [[METAL BOXES]] up Carron's ass.

Few men approach the manliness level of Vance Motherfucking Stubbs. The only ones that do are all [[Imperial Guard|Imperial]]. It says a lot.

Stubbs also has a fucking awesome name. Few, if any, in the 41st Millennium can approach that level of awesomeness, even <s>"Holt"</s>. <s>{{BLAM}}</s> {{BLAM|*SLAP*}} '''COMMISSAR''' Holt!

Vance is also as badass, to inspire a single guardsman to noscope one shot a living saint in SS (see the video for lulz that'd make the Avatar of Khaine that the ultrasmurfs killed go 'Ha... like a bitch'). Further lulz includes the Chaos Stronghold Defeat where we see Vance's four (Literally!) Imperial Guardsmen one-shotting pretty much every Chaos-worshipping bitch in the area, as well as Vance himself, balls-slapping the [[Fail|failure of a Chaos Lord,]] [[Firaeveus Carron|Firaeveus Carron]]. This shows how badass and cool Vance Motherfucking Stubbs is and how his very presence can turn the Guardsmen's standard-issue balls-of-steel into Adamantium-tipped power-balls that would be so heavy they could bitch-slap a Titan if they so need it.

Additionally, Vance is not only a motherfucker himself, [[Reasonable Marines|but a pragmatic motherfucker.]] On his siege on the Tau special moon base, Vance ordered his men that instead of destroying the Space Commie Cannon ([[Wat|giant ass cannon in Soulstorm that destroys advanced life forms but saves the trees...]]) [[Creed|he thought it would be much more practical to use it against those cunt-face blueberries.]] The work paid off as Vance and his men hilariously start to pile drive the Tau with their own technology as those space weeaboos start to shit their grey-ass; before pussy whipping the Tau Ethereal in front of the Tau Commander stationed at the moon. Instead of actually destroying any further Tau technology, to prove how much of a pragmatist he is, the motherfucker-in-chief decides to hoard some Xeno relics as bargaining tools for the [[Ordo Xenos]] and other similar Imperial groups in order to gain the upper hand to protect the prestige of his men. What a motherfucker.

No, it isn't possible to say Vance Motherfucking Stubbs without 'Motherfucking' in the middle, or spelling it in all caps.

==...In actuality==
[[Image:StubbsDW.jpg|400px|thumb|left|Even in his stronghold defeat cutscene, he's still badass.]]
As of DoW3's release, the victor of Soulstorm was revealed to be none other than.... [[Gorgutz 'Ead 'Unter]], rather than Vance Motherfucking Stubbs. This of course caused much [[RAGE]] at the release of the game, which coupled with the games radically different gameplay and lack of the Imperial Guard as a faction and generally being shit, only continued to divide people's opinion further. However, we do not know if Vance survived or was killed in combat, although given that he gets away to fight another day in his defeat outro, the former is more likely. What happened next is not clarified, so feel free to imagine whatever version of subsequent events you like.

Although, really, if anyone deserved to win by virtue of sheer awesomeness other than Stubbs, it was definitely Gorgutz. Plus let's be real, Gorgutz is a frequently reoccurring character while Vance Motherfucking Stubbs is a one off; narrative rules were on Gorgutz's side the moment he was confirmed for Dawn of War 3. Of course, Gorgutz doesn't exactly stick around after his victories, so it is entirely possible that after he fucked off to find the Spear of Khaine, Stubbs could have retaken the system with the Orks' leader gone. Although given that Stubbs' reputation would probably have been destroyed by his defeat, it's likely he was executed for incompetence and picking a fight with the Ecclesiarchy and Adeptus Astartes. Gorgutz's victory cutscene also states that Kaurava's Ork hordes will come to plague Ultima Segmentum for countless years to come, so it's unlikely that Stubbs would have been able to reclaim it, especially as Soulstorm happens towards the tail end of the 41st millennium where the Imperium is due for getting smacked by the rise of many major Necron Dynasties, WAAAGH! Ghazghkull, the arrival of Hive Fleet Leviathan, and the 13th Black Crusade almost simultaneously.

<strike>While true, it was also assumed by players that Vance was the winner. So, now players are left with two winners and two different endings both being true for the sake of DoW III having Gorgutz.</strike> *KRUMP* NO DEY DIDDNT! DEY JUS' SED DAT BOREALE GIT LOST! YA 'UMIE GITS KEEP SAYIN' DAT, BUT YOO NEVA SHOW US ENNY PROOF DAT DEY DID! 'SIDES, DERE'S DA STANDARD OV KAURAVA FINGY IN DoW 2 DAT SEZ WE WON!!

In all likelihood, the rumour probably started with BigDickCheney using the Imperial Guard as his faction of choice when he uploaded the Soulstorm stronghold defeat videos onto Youtube. While Thule was quickly declared the canonical winner of Dark Crusade, Relic was annoyingly silent for years after Soulstorm beyond saying that the winner wasn't the Blood Ravens in Dawn of War 2 and so the usual game of Chinese Whispers ended up becoming rock hard canon in the heads of fans despite the lack of proof. So much so that hints that Gorgutz was the actual winner stated in (admittedly easily missed) lore blurbs for items in Retribution went unnoticed until Relic made its answer impossible to ignore.

The whole mess was born out of a case of an admittedly small group of fans assuming something was true even though there was no real evidence for it and the people in charge of the official canon not bothering to correct them until the fanon was already entrenched with this small group. Stubbs winning at Kaurava was one of those "everyone knows!" things even though you'd be hard pressed to find an average fan who knew that or even the flimsy and indirect evidence of it happening anywhere in Dawn of War 2. The lesson to take away from this is that fans shouldn't assume something is true just because some one on the internet say it is, especially when the dev's have never supported this 'fact'.

==See Also==
[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cno-_CM0yyU Commissar, I would like to see this city built up again. I would like to see towers and spires of gleaming white. I would like to see our men on parade routes, not tours of duty! I WOULD LIKE TO SEE EVERY CITY ON THIS PLANET, EVERY COLONY ON THIS BESOTTED, MISERABLE SYSTEM TURNED TO THE SERVICE AND INDUSTRY OF THE IMPERIUM IN THE EMPEROR'S NAME!]-(Ain't Stubbs an idealistic badass?)

==In the Soulstorm campaign==
Vance is your early melee tank who is able to protect your precious flashlight trooper from all kinds of nasty melee units like Ork Boyz, Assault Marines and Banshees. He can recruit 4 kinds of bodyguard such as Commissar, Warrior Priest, Pysker and Kasrkin Sergeant.

Commissar gives extra morale. Psyker gives detection to stealth units as well as their [[heresy|dangerous]] psychic abilities. Warrior Priest gives extra morale, speed and health([[cheese|with the awesome ability to make Vance invincible if the your base has reached tier 3]]). The Kasrkin Sergeants is only available after Ibram's Vestment is unlock and it gives Vance extra 100 hp, 150 morale.

So in summary, if you want Vance to be a [[eliphas|mega]] [[Gorgutz|tank]], you need to have every bodyguard as a Warrior Priest which not only gives Vance lots of health, but also allows Vance to use the Priest's invincibility 5 TIMES.

Though if you want Vance to be shooty, you needs to have all Kasrkin Sergeants (who are pretty cheap and fast to recruit by the way) and they will shoot everyone to shits with their advanced flashlights Hellgun.

Psyker's detection is kind of useless if Vance has the Targeting Optics wargear and it's psychic abilities is not really that useful since you rely on your flashlight troopers' dakka damage most of the time.

Commissar's extra morale isn't worth to recruit but it can put out some dakka and it does not requires Ibram's Vestment so it would be a early placement for Kasrkin Sergeants.

By the time Vance is fully upgraded, he can eat buildings and vehicles for breakfast and tanking relic units like the frigging Nightbringer toe to toe with his invincibility.

==Codex Stubbs==
Now your Guardsmen can be led by this badass.

'''Vance "Motherfucking" Stubbs. Governor General of Kaurava:'''
Vance Stubbs may replace the Company Commander of a Company Command Squad or the Tempestor Prime of a Militorum Tempestus Platoon Command Squad (in which case the Militorum Tempestus Platoon Command Squad becomes an HQ choice) for 110 points.
{| class="wikitable"
|-
! Name !! WS !! BS !! S !! T !! W !! I !! A !! Ld !! Sv
|-
| '''Vance Stubbs''' || 5 || 5 || 3 || 4 || 3 || 4 || 3 || 10 || 4+/5++
|}
TYPE: '''Infantry'''
 Warlord Trait: '''Bellowing Voice'''
 Special Rules:
*A Father to his Men: Every Astra Militarum model within Vance's Command Radius has +1 Leadership.
*Hatred (Tau)
*'''Ambidextrous''': Vance Stubbs may fire both his Storm Bolter and his Plasma Gun during the shooting phase (he must still fire at the same target as his unit) or when firing overwatch.
*'''Voice of Command'''
*Senior Officer
*Stubborn
Wargear:
*'''Plasma Gun'''
*'''Battle Claws''': These are a pair of Master-Crafted Power Claws that grant +1 Strength.
*'''Storm Bolter'''
*'''Carapace Armour'''
*'''Bionics''': Improves Vance's Toughness by 1 (already represented in his profile) and grants the Feel No Pain special rule.
*'''Macharian Cross''': After deployment is complete (including deploying infiltrators and moving scouts) but before determining who has the first turn, any single infantry squad within 6” of Vance Stubbs may be redeployed up to 12” but otherwise must abide by all of the mission's deployment zones and rules.
*'''Ibram’s Vestment''': Grants the Preferred Enemy special rule to friendly models within 12".
Frag Grenades
*'''Frag and Krak Grenades'''
*'''Melta Bombs'''

==8th Edition==
One fa/tg/uy's attempt to drag Vance Motherfucking Stubbs kicking and screaming (mostly kicking arse) into 8th Edition:

[https://docs.google.com/document/d/1U6o1jP8ue2cPy_s_xyyGGtQ0SoKjBjQfskfYAWqz58I/edit?usp=sharing Can be found here.]

== Gallery ==
<gallery>
Image:VanceStubbsHate.JPG|Tau Propaganda
Image:VanceMotherfuckingStubbs1.png|Vance Motherfucking Stubbs checking out his impressive claws.
</gallery>

{{IG-Characters}}

[[Category: Dawn of War]]

Vance Motherfucking Stubbs

2020-10-27T10:24:37Z

2600:1700:8C93:3110:8DA8:8C97:678E:31C8:

{{Awesome}}
{{cleanup}}
[[Image:VanceMFStubbs.png|450px|thumb|right|The motherfucker himself.]]
{{topquote|I am not afraid of an army of lions led by a sheep. I am afraid of an army of sheep led by a Lion.|Alexander the Great}}

He's '''Vance. Motherfucking. Stubbs.''' An [[Imperial Guard]] general and total badass from [[Dawn_of_War#Soulstorm|Dawn of War: Soulstorm]] and the only character introduced in the expansion anyone unironically likes, despite having arguably the worst voice actor (his performance is just bad, and not with enough ENGRISH or ham to be unintentionally funny like Boreale or Carron). This is mostly because his competition is a Necron Lord with some of the most obnoxious robo-mummy asthma ever who clearly wants to be as cool as Thomas Maccabee but isn't, the wussiest Khornate lord to have ever disgraced the Blood God, a bald brother genericus with a dumb accent, a Cannoness whose entire personality is "is a Sister of Battle", a Farseer with an especially annoying high pitched voice that makes her sound like she's actually two preteen Eldar girls with one sitting on the other's shoulders so they can pretend to be an adult like [[Girls und Panzer|some cartoon,]] a painfully generic Archon with a stupid hat, and "I can't believe it's not Shas'O'Kais" but with the added tendency to go into melodrama of a bad anime protagonist. He's the most badass Governor General....ever....well maybe at tie with [[General Sturnn]] who's equally awesome, but wasn't a governor.

No, you cannot say his name without Motherfucking in the middle.

==About the Motherfucker==
Vance Motherfucking Stubbs leads the 252nd Kaurava Conservator Regiment for the Imperial Guard in the game. He is armed (apparently like every other Command Squad leader in the Galaxy) with a set of Power Claws and a Bolter strapped to his arm. He may also, in fact, have a Thunder Hammer for a penis, but his harem of lovers were all too exhausted to comment on the matter.

The entire Imperial Guard campaign featuring him is sheer [[AWESOME]]. When the player chooses to play as the Imperial Guard in Soulstorm, then it is written in the army selection menu that Stubbs recently transferred before the Kaurava Hijinks that resulted in nearly every single force to appear in the [[Kaurava System]]. The Guard, like any player controlled army, starts with one region (in the Guard's case is the Dussala Precinct). Mind you, compared to the other forces that come to the system, the 252nd Conservator Regiment is at that time underpowered, with low morale and simply sucks. Stubbs therefore whips them with sheer manliness (and a series of reforms) turning the 252nd back into a fighting force that shouldn't be trifled with and proceeds to <s>re-conquer the system one region at a time</s> Lose to '''DA ORKZ'''. With the release of DoW3, it has been confirmed that the Orkz under Gorgutz 'Ead 'Unter were the canonical victor. Yes, we're not quite sure what happened either. '''WUT 'APPENED? WE IS ORKS AND YOU IS NOT, UMMIE, DAT'S WUT 'APPENED!'''

[[File:ORKZ ARE DA BEST.png|300px|thumb|right|Despite Stubb's best efforts, Orkz snatched the victory. Why? 'CAUSE ORKZ ARE DA BEST]]
If the Guard is victorious in the conflict, then the system is revitalized as Stubbs commissions multiple projects that rebuilds the worlds and improves their industrial capabilities. Additionally the planets become militarized due to the large number of newly constructed military academies that produce superior regiments that are second only to the Kasrkins trained at [[Cadia|Cadia's]] Kasrs (a impressive feat considering that Kasrkins are elite even by Tempestus Scions/Storm Trooper standards).

The Emperor protects indeed.

Worth mentioning is the attack on the [[Ecclesiarchy]] controlled Sama District. Stubbs knew well that it didn't matter how much he and his men would make amends, the Regiment would never be free from being suspected by the Sisters, as the Warpstorm over Kaurava IV happened on Vance's watch. Not to mention that even if they did repent, the Sisters of Battle of the Order of The Sacred Rose would make them do so with excessive amounts of flamers and purging. Vance had no other option in this case. Stubbs refused any of these accusations and thought himself and his men not responsible for the whole mess, thus he did something that was crazy enough to work...mainly to march into the Sama District in full-force and simply conquer the place. And if the Guardsmen are victorious, then Vance will utter a speech that the Emperor was with the Conservators this day.

==The whole losing 100 Baneblades thing==
When facing the Imperial Guard at their stronghold in Dawn of War: Soulstorm, Stubbs' Commissar informs him that all 100 of the [[Baneblade|Baneblades]] that would have been available to defend had just been sent off to help the Imperial Guard elsewhere in the Kaurava system, and any more Baneblades that are needed will have to be constructed via a series of pieces sent out by supply Rhinos. This absurdity of simply "losing" 100 Baneblades has spawned a number of jokes amongst players, mostly associating him with being "Tactically incompetent" as opposed to [[Creed]]'s "Tactical Genius". (Speaking of tactical genius it may be worth mentioning that shortly after this incident Abaddon was run over by a column of Baneblades he found stuffed in his mailbox) Also it can be disregarded as Chaos Propaganda started by <s>[[Alpha Legion|Alpha Legion Chaos Marines]]</s> {{BLAM|*BLAM!!!*}} [[Chaos Space Marines| THOSE CHAOS SPACE MARINES]] THAT DO NOT EXIST!!

However, there have been rumors that the Baneblades never left, but they were hidden by [[Creed]], or perhaps taken by the [[Blood Ravens |Blood Magpies]] ( [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LNK5-uE5JFg| IT IS THE BAAAAAAANNNNEEBLAAAAAAADEEE] ). Adding on top of this, Baneblades are supposed to be rare (with three per regiment being the average), made only at major Forge Worlds. Fortunately for the Imperium, the in-game background for Stubbs's Baneblades is that the invasions and mass destruction miraculously uncovered the rather terrifying (for the enemy) fact that at least half of the entire supercontinent city of Kaurava I is in fact built on top of a continent-sized manufactorum, probably from the Great Crusade, devoted to the mass-production of Baneblades.

This enabled Stubbs to roll out more Baneblades in a month than Forge Worlds (individually, of course) produce in a century. Best of all, the fact you can build more manufactorums in-game suggests that the Mechanicus could probably mass-produce the ''factories'', too. With the pacified Tomb World nearby to draw in the Mechanicus plus the carrot Stubbs now has with the Baneblades and whatever other STC data uncovered (maybe Fellblades and other awesome stuff?), along with Stubbs's clear care for the little people, it is likely he could convince/trade for the Tomb World being studied and Forgeworld-ified by various important Forge Worlds, giving him access to their unique data (such as Executioners and Vanquisher cannons). Sure, the individual Forge Worlds never share anything, but then, none of them have had the technological buffet on a scale Vance does to bargain with. That, and he doesn't seem the sort to give a crap about keeping tech to himself. Then he can happily send copies to every Forge World if he can pay captains to visit. Then the Imperium wins by default. Regardless, Vance Motherfucking Stubbs is seen as one of the most awesome Imperial Guard generals because of his calm, stern voice, even when his army is on the brink of defeat.

<s>Relic never bothered to announce who actually canonically won the Kaurava conflict</s> Scratch that; Orkz were the victors, see above. - only that it sure as the [[Warp]] wasn't the Space Marines. Hence, many players simply accepted the fact that Stubbs won the war because of his utter badassery that no other character was able to posses. And also the rumors that he found the 100 Baneblades again and used his variation [[Creed|taktikul jinyas]] to deep strike said Baneblades into the main bases of armies. We would have said [[Indrick Boreale]] was the canon winner of the Kaurava conflict - if only he didn't screw it up by canonically losing horribly.

Alas, as it turns out he wasn't quite badass enough to stand up to Gorgutz' WAAAGH, which was able to defeat him and force him to retreat from Kaurava. Given the fact that Gorgutz got bored and left the Kaurava system for Acheron some time afterward, one can only hope Stubbs took advantage of the ensuing Ork civil war to reclaim the system, just as he swore he would.

But at least we know what happened to the 100 Baneblades: Gorgutz krumped them.

==Badass Facts==
[[File:Relic00014.jpg|450px|thumbnail|right|What really happened to Carron that day. (Yes, the giblet on the ground is in fact his spleen! Why is it on the ground, he may or may not have shat it out.)]]
What is truly stunning about Vance Motherfucking Stubbs is the intense humanity he exhibits; whilst almost every commander in Soulstorm was poorly developed or simply [[Firaeveus Carron|pants-on-head retarded]], Stubbs was [[Fist of the North Star|comparatively sympathetic]] - determined to win back his regiment's good name in the eyes of the Emperor and who strove to make sure the sacrifices of his men weren't for nothing, and was determined to restore honour to his unit, heedless of what heretical scum would stand in their way. He shows manly [[Rage|rage]] at the tortures the [[Dark Eldar]] subjected captured soldiers to, and unlike Aleksander, who panicked in [[Dawn of War|Dark Crusade]] when Eliphas sent him telepathic messages, Stubbs gritted his teeth and shrugged it off, spurring his men onwards towards their objective in an effort to shove a formation of [[METAL BOXES]] up Carron's ass.

Few men approach the manliness level of Vance Motherfucking Stubbs. The only ones that do are all [[Imperial Guard|Imperial]]. It says a lot.

Stubbs also has a fucking awesome name. Few, if any, in the 41st Millennium can approach that level of awesomeness, even <s>"Holt"</s>. <s>{{BLAM}}</s> {{BLAM|*SLAP*}} '''COMMISSAR''' Holt!

Vance is also as badass, to inspire a single guardsman to noscope one shot a living saint in SS (see the video for lulz that'd make the Avatar of Khaine that the ultrasmurfs killed go 'Ha... like a bitch'). Further lulz includes the Chaos Stronghold Defeat where we see Vance's four (Literally!) Imperial Guardsmen one-shotting pretty much every Chaos-worshipping bitch in the area, as well as Vance himself, balls-slapping the [[Fail|failure of a Chaos Lord,]] [[Firaeveus Carron|Firaeveus Carron]]. This shows how badass and cool Vance Motherfucking Stubbs is and how his very presence can turn the Guardsmen's standard-issue balls-of-steel into Adamantium-tipped power-balls that would be so heavy they could bitch-slap a Titan if they so need it.

Additionally, Vance is not only a motherfucker himself, [[Reasonable Marines|but a pragmatic motherfucker.]] On his siege on the Tau special moon base, Vance ordered his men that instead of destroying the Space Commie Cannon ([[Wat|giant ass cannon in Soulstorm that destroys advanced life forms but saves the trees...]]) [[Creed|he thought it would be much more practical to use it against those cunt-face blueberries.]] The work paid off as Vance and his men hilariously start to pile drive the Tau with their own technology as those space weeaboos start to shit their grey-ass; before pussy whipping the Tau Ethereal in front of the Tau Commander stationed at the moon. Instead of actually destroying any further Tau technology, to prove how much of a pragmatist he is, the motherfucker-in-chief decides to hoard some Xeno relics as bargaining tools for the [[Ordo Xenos]] and other similar Imperial groups in order to gain the upper hand to protect the prestige of his men. What a motherfucker.

Also on his defeat of the Eldar, he was reported to have secretly [[Love Can Bloom|boned]] [[Caerys]] to the point of fucking her precognition which might explain why she constantly [[Fail|fails]] [[Farseer|at her job,]] that or she might have accidentally tried to peek at Vance's mind only to see multiple images on his...ehem...[[/d/|'Thunderhammer']] [[Extra Heresy|which may have promptly made her wet herself and lose all psychic concentration.]] Heck she may even secretly have joined Vance's harem of lovers as she wasn't canonically seen getting killed. Vance's harem possibly includes several chosen [[Imperial Guard|Guardswomen]] (Who are often left exhausted and near death after his 'regimental training'), an entire squad of [[Howling Banshees]] (He really makes them 'Howl' if you know what I mean...), several Dark Eldar [[Wyches]] (Even they admit that he's merciless as he brutally pulverizes them since they're Xenos and stuff) and even a couple of [[Sisters of Battle|Sisters]] (Who have not immolated themselves but dropped their guns in awe as he gave them a new meaning to 'divine intervention'). But as usual, when asked about this potential [[Heresy]] Stubbs just shrugs off with a cool breeze as cold as [[Fenris]] before continuing his duty in obliterating the enemies of Man. The [[Emprah]] works in mysterious ways and Stubbs is no exception.

No, it isn't possible to say Vance Motherfucking Stubbs without 'Motherfucking' in the middle, or spelling it in all caps.

==...In actuality==
[[Image:StubbsDW.jpg|400px|thumb|left|Even in his stronghold defeat cutscene, he's still badass.]]
As of DoW3's release, the victor of Soulstorm was revealed to be none other than.... [[Gorgutz 'Ead 'Unter]], rather than Vance Motherfucking Stubbs. This of course caused much [[RAGE]] at the release of the game, which coupled with the games radically different gameplay and lack of the Imperial Guard as a faction and generally being shit, only continued to divide people's opinion further. However, we do not know if Vance survived or was killed in combat, although given that he gets away to fight another day in his defeat outro, the former is more likely. What happened next is not clarified, so feel free to imagine whatever version of subsequent events you like.

Although, really, if anyone deserved to win by virtue of sheer awesomeness other than Stubbs, it was definitely Gorgutz. Plus let's be real, Gorgutz is a frequently reoccurring character while Vance Motherfucking Stubbs is a one off; narrative rules were on Gorgutz's side the moment he was confirmed for Dawn of War 3. Of course, Gorgutz doesn't exactly stick around after his victories, so it is entirely possible that after he fucked off to find the Spear of Khaine, Stubbs could have retaken the system with the Orks' leader gone. Although given that Stubbs' reputation would probably have been destroyed by his defeat, it's likely he was executed for incompetence and picking a fight with the Ecclesiarchy and Adeptus Astartes. Gorgutz's victory cutscene also states that Kaurava's Ork hordes will come to plague Ultima Segmentum for countless years to come, so it's unlikely that Stubbs would have been able to reclaim it, especially as Soulstorm happens towards the tail end of the 41st millennium where the Imperium is due for getting smacked by the rise of many major Necron Dynasties, WAAAGH! Ghazghkull, the arrival of Hive Fleet Leviathan, and the 13th Black Crusade almost simultaneously.

<strike>While true, it was also assumed by players that Vance was the winner. So, now players are left with two winners and two different endings both being true for the sake of DoW III having Gorgutz.</strike> *KRUMP* NO DEY DIDDNT! DEY JUS' SED DAT BOREALE GIT LOST! YA 'UMIE GITS KEEP SAYIN' DAT, BUT YOO NEVA SHOW US ENNY PROOF DAT DEY DID! 'SIDES, DERE'S DA STANDARD OV KAURAVA FINGY IN DoW 2 DAT SEZ WE WON!!

In all likelihood, the rumour probably started with BigDickCheney using the Imperial Guard as his faction of choice when he uploaded the Soulstorm stronghold defeat videos onto Youtube. While Thule was quickly declared the canonical winner of Dark Crusade, Relic was annoyingly silent for years after Soulstorm beyond saying that the winner wasn't the Blood Ravens in Dawn of War 2 and so the usual game of Chinese Whispers ended up becoming rock hard canon in the heads of fans despite the lack of proof. So much so that hints that Gorgutz was the actual winner stated in (admittedly easily missed) lore blurbs for items in Retribution went unnoticed until Relic made its answer impossible to ignore.

The whole mess was born out of a case of an admittedly small group of fans assuming something was true even though there was no real evidence for it and the people in charge of the official canon not bothering to correct them until the fanon was already entrenched with this small group. Stubbs winning at Kaurava was one of those "everyone knows!" things even though you'd be hard pressed to find an average fan who knew that or even the flimsy and indirect evidence of it happening anywhere in Dawn of War 2. The lesson to take away from this is that fans shouldn't assume something is true just because some one on the internet say it is, especially when the dev's have never supported this 'fact'.

==See Also==
[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cno-_CM0yyU Commissar, I would like to see this city built up again. I would like to see towers and spires of gleaming white. I would like to see our men on parade routes, not tours of duty! I WOULD LIKE TO SEE EVERY CITY ON THIS PLANET, EVERY COLONY ON THIS BESOTTED, MISERABLE SYSTEM TURNED TO THE SERVICE AND INDUSTRY OF THE IMPERIUM IN THE EMPEROR'S NAME!]-(Ain't Stubbs an idealistic badass?)

==In the Soulstorm campaign==
Vance is your early melee tank who is able to protect your precious flashlight trooper from all kinds of nasty melee units like Ork Boyz, Assault Marines and Banshees. He can recruit 4 kinds of bodyguard such as Commissar, Warrior Priest, Pysker and Kasrkin Sergeant.

Commissar gives extra morale. Psyker gives detection to stealth units as well as their [[heresy|dangerous]] psychic abilities. Warrior Priest gives extra morale, speed and health([[cheese|with the awesome ability to make Vance invincible if the your base has reached tier 3]]). The Kasrkin Sergeants is only available after Ibram's Vestment is unlock and it gives Vance extra 100 hp, 150 morale.

So in summary, if you want Vance to be a [[eliphas|mega]] [[Gorgutz|tank]], you need to have every bodyguard as a Warrior Priest which not only gives Vance lots of health, but also allows Vance to use the Priest's invincibility 5 TIMES.

Though if you want Vance to be shooty, you needs to have all Kasrkin Sergeants (who are pretty cheap and fast to recruit by the way) and they will shoot everyone to shits with their advanced flashlights Hellgun.

Psyker's detection is kind of useless if Vance has the Targeting Optics wargear and it's psychic abilities is not really that useful since you rely on your flashlight troopers' dakka damage most of the time.

Commissar's extra morale isn't worth to recruit but it can put out some dakka and it does not requires Ibram's Vestment so it would be a early placement for Kasrkin Sergeants.

By the time Vance is fully upgraded, he can eat buildings and vehicles for breakfast and tanking relic units like the frigging Nightbringer toe to toe with his invincibility.

==Codex Stubbs==
Now your Guardsmen can be led by this badass.

'''Vance "Motherfucking" Stubbs. Governor General of Kaurava:'''
Vance Stubbs may replace the Company Commander of a Company Command Squad or the Tempestor Prime of a Militorum Tempestus Platoon Command Squad (in which case the Militorum Tempestus Platoon Command Squad becomes an HQ choice) for 110 points.
{| class="wikitable"
|-
! Name !! WS !! BS !! S !! T !! W !! I !! A !! Ld !! Sv
|-
| '''Vance Stubbs''' || 5 || 5 || 3 || 4 || 3 || 4 || 3 || 10 || 4+/5++
|}
TYPE: '''Infantry'''
 Warlord Trait: '''Bellowing Voice'''
 Special Rules:
*A Father to his Men: Every Astra Militarum model within Vance's Command Radius has +1 Leadership.
*Hatred (Tau)
*'''Ambidextrous''': Vance Stubbs may fire both his Storm Bolter and his Plasma Gun during the shooting phase (he must still fire at the same target as his unit) or when firing overwatch.
*'''Voice of Command'''
*Senior Officer
*Stubborn
Wargear:
*'''Plasma Gun'''
*'''Battle Claws''': These are a pair of Master-Crafted Power Claws that grant +1 Strength.
*'''Storm Bolter'''
*'''Carapace Armour'''
*'''Bionics''': Improves Vance's Toughness by 1 (already represented in his profile) and grants the Feel No Pain special rule.
*'''Macharian Cross''': After deployment is complete (including deploying infiltrators and moving scouts) but before determining who has the first turn, any single infantry squad within 6” of Vance Stubbs may be redeployed up to 12” but otherwise must abide by all of the mission's deployment zones and rules.
*'''Ibram’s Vestment''': Grants the Preferred Enemy special rule to friendly models within 12".
Frag Grenades
*'''Frag and Krak Grenades'''
*'''Melta Bombs'''

==8th Edition==
One fa/tg/uy's attempt to drag Vance Motherfucking Stubbs kicking and screaming (mostly kicking arse) into 8th Edition:

[https://docs.google.com/document/d/1U6o1jP8ue2cPy_s_xyyGGtQ0SoKjBjQfskfYAWqz58I/edit?usp=sharing Can be found here.]

== Gallery ==
<gallery>
Image:VanceStubbsHate.JPG|Tau Propaganda
Image:VanceMotherfuckingStubbs1.png|Vance Motherfucking Stubbs checking out his impressive claws.
</gallery>

{{IG-Characters}}

[[Category: Dawn of War]]

General Sturnn

2020-10-27T09:51:37Z

2600:1700:8C93:3110:8DA8:8C97:678E:31C8:

[[Image:Sturnn.JPG|thumb|right|Grit Incarnate. (if you look closely you'll notice his entire face is a bulletproof callus)]]
{{Topquote|To each of us falls a task. And all the emperor requires of us Guardsmen is that we stand the line and we die fighting. It is what we do best. We die standing.|General Sturnn in [[Dawn of War]]: [[Dawn of War#Winter Assault|Winter Assault]].}}

Not to be confused with [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jeff_Bridges Jeff Bridges].

'''General Sturnn''' AKA Grit Incarnate or Grit made Manifest, is the commander of the Cadian 412th Regiment in the [[Dawn_of_War#Winter Assault|Dawn of War: Winter Assault]] game.

Unlike the other Imperial Generals in the succeeding [[Dawn of War|Dawn of War]] games, Sturnn is actually [[Old Ones|old]] (rather than looking in his early 40s), and looks like he's been into a fight or ten. He and his Regiment were ordered to secure the Emperor-class [[Titan#Warhammer 40,000|Titan]], Dominatus, on Lorn V, left behind when the Planet was lost to [[Chaos]] Forces.

The main difference between him and General [[Vance Motherfucking Stubbs]] is that Sturnn's got the one thing that separates the Man-General from the Boy-General: Grit. His idea of a planetary beachhead against super-human, power armour-wearing chaos worshipers is to personally land with a single [[Commissar]] and 6 squads of [[Imperial Guard| Imperial Guardsmen]] right on the doorsteps of a god damn Chaos-held Defense Fortress. His choice of tactics might be connected with the fact that since he possesses a gritted, roached out voice, he possibly drinks himself to sleep at night, but that's just how he does things (although he's got so much grit he probably doesn't even need to sleep).

He also doesn't feel the need to wear a golden breastplate, have a [[Plasma#Plasma Pistol|Plasma Pistol]], super-duper powerclaws, bodyguards, optical bionics, [[Pauldrons|Over-sized Pauldrons]], fancy golden boots or a shiny new cape. He only wears his gritted face, cheap powerclaws, forearm storm [[Bolter]] and his Medal covered Imperial Guard uniform, which offers good protection against anything, especially against [[Eldar|Space ''fairy'']] trickery and guile. The sheer amount of medals he has gained literally gives him about as much armor as a [[Space Marine]] [[Terminator]]. All of these have been earned from incredible feats of manliness, such as [[Commissar Yarrick|killing an Ork Warboss by beating him to death with his own severed arm]], or [[Doomrider|single-handedly holding off a Tyranid Hive Fleet while cooking a space bugs carcass for his men]].

His Manly Grit has earned him praises from [[Space Marines]], right after defeating a bunch of [[Necrons]] who just woke up and had a bad case of the morning blues, [[Ork|Orks]] looking for trouble and the Chaos forces on Lorn V.

Sadly, he did not make it to [[Dawn of War#Dark Crusade|Dawn of War: Dark Crusade]], being replaced by some [[General Lucas Alexander|snot-nosed Boy-General]], who laughably tried to imitate his grittiness by finding '''A SINGLE ARM OF SOME RANDOM TITAN WHICH WAS JUST LYING 5 FEET FROM HIS SUPER SECURE AND OUT OF REACH LANDING ZONE.''' That General was Named [[Governor-Militant Lukas Alexander]], if only because Sturnn was elsewhere, possibly busy killing some other enemy of the [[Imperium|Imperium of Man]] with but a glance of his Grit-filled stare.

==Fate==
Some would have you believe that Sturnn died in Winter Assault and the Eldar ending is [[Canon|canon]], but a piece of Imperial Guard wargear in Retribution outright states that General Sturnn did lead his men to the Imperator Titan. In Eldar ending, however, the Imperial Guard ''did'' retake the Titan, but it exploded after overheating, therefore killing everyone near it (except the pointy-ears faggots who had departed back into the [[Webway]]). <s>Yeap, Sturnn included, so he is totally dead</s> His adamantium balls are graded at 0.7 [[Sly Marbo|Sly Marbos]] on the wardian plot-armour scale, as such he is easily capable of surviving something as trivial as an exploding Titan.

However, the FFG [[Only War]] sourcebook ''Hammer of the Emperor'' states that General Sturnn was betrayed by [[Taldeer]] and the Eldar <del>and "cut down in a hail of shuriken fire."</del> {{BLAM|'''BLAM!''' '''HERESY!!!'''}} ''DID YOU NOT JUST READ WHAT IT SAID ABOUT HIS MEDALS?''

Then there's that Eldar campaign intro in Dark Crusade where the narrator hints that the Eldar pitted the Imperial Guard against the Necrons on Lorn V. However, this piece of dialogue only raises more questions than answers (typical). However, there's also the Imperial Guard campaign where Alexander's secondary goal (besides 'liberating' the planet) is hunting down Taldeer and taking her out, and we don't mean on a <del>romantic</del> HERETICAL date. She must've done something ''big''... say, blowing up an irreplaceable war machine that could single-handedly turn the tide of an entire campaign?

Really, who knows. The majority of evidence points to an Eldar victory on Lorn V, but it's highly unlikely that Sturnn would allow himself to be killed by any amount of Space Fairy faggotry, and frankly any notions to that are ridiculous and [[Extra Heresy|extra heretical]].

Actually, it is quite possible that he originally died in Winter Assault (As evidenced by the Taldeer hunt in DC), but then Relic retconned it into him winning (As evidenced by the Retribution Wargear). That, or the Eldar victory had elements of the Imperial Guard victory (as in Sturnn survived and got the Titan Dominatus, albeit heavily damaged due to [[Wraithbone]] shenanigans). So it's really a toss up if you really think about, I'd say that there's a 50/50 chance he was kicking ass at the [[Cadia|Fall of Cadia]].

Speaking from an entirely hypothetical perspective, it would in many ways make sense if [[Gorgutz]] killed him, as he and Taldeer are the only characters that carry over, and it directly shows Sturnn being pulverized by Gorgutz, so this is entirely possible.

Though this too seems unlikely as Gorgutz' only real tactic seems to be runnz away from all dem otha gits. <s>Some Ork warboss amirite?</s> '''*WHAM!*''' Shut it yeh git!
This also only happens in the disorder campaign of Winter Assault, which is definitely non-canon (aside from Gorgutz smashing Lord [[Crull]] and claiming his head).

And if you STILL think he isn't already badass enough, just listen to him [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gVnJH2scIVk address his men.]

{{IG-Characters}}
[[Category: Dawn of War]]

General Sturnn

2020-10-27T09:48:24Z

2600:1700:8C93:3110:8DA8:8C97:678E:31C8:

[[Image:Sturnn.JPG|thumb|right|Grit Incarnate. (if you look closely you'll notice his entire face is a bulletproof callus)]]
{{Topquote|To each of us falls a task. And all the emperor requires of us Guardsmen is that we stand the line and we die fighting. It is what we do best. We die standing.|General Sturnn in [[Dawn of War]]: [[Dawn of War#Winter Assault|Winter Assault]].}}

Not to be confused with [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jeff_Bridges Jeff Bridges].

'''General Sturnn''' AKA Grit Incarnate or Grit made Manifest, is the commander of the Cadian 412th Regiment in the [[Dawn_of_War#Winter Assault|Dawn of War: Winter Assault]] game.

Unlike the other Imperial Generals in the succeeding [[Dawn of War|Dawn of War]] games, Sturnn is actually [[Old Ones|old]] (rather than looking in his early 40s), and looks like he's been into a fight or ten. He and his Regiment were ordered to secure the Emperor-class [[Titan#Warhammer 40,000|Titan]], Dominatus, on Lorn V, left behind when the Planet was lost to [[Chaos]] Forces.

The main difference between him and General [[Vance Motherfucking Stubbs]] is that Sturnn's got the one thing that separates the Man-General from the Boy-General: Grit. His idea of a planetary beachhead against super-human, power armour-wearing chaos worshipers is to personally land with a single [[Commissar]] and 6 squads of [[Imperial Guard| Imperial Guardsmen]] right on the doorsteps of a god damn Chaos-held Defense Fortress. His choice of tactics might be connected with the fact that since he possesses a gritted, roached out voice, he possibly drinks himself to sleep at night, but that's just how he does things (although he's got so much grit he probably doesn't even need to sleep).

He also doesn't feel the need to wear a golden breastplate, have a [[Plasma#Plasma Pistol|Plasma Pistol]], super-duper powerclaws, bodyguards, optical bionics, [[Pauldrons|Over-sized Pauldrons]], fancy golden boots or a shiny new cape. He only wears his gritted face, cheap powerclaws, forearm storm [[Bolter]] and his Medal covered Imperial Guard uniform, which offers good protection against anything, especially against [[Eldar|Space ''fairy'']] trickery and guile. The sheer amount of medals he has gained literally gives him about as much armor as a [[Space Marine]] [[Terminator]]. All of these have been earned from incredible feats of manliness, such as [[Commissar Yarrick|killing an Ork Warboss by beating him to death with his own severed arm]], or [[Doomrider|single-handedly holding off a Tyranid Hive Fleet while cooking from a space bug steaks for his men]].

His Manly Grit has earned him praises from [[Space Marines]], right after defeating a bunch of [[Necrons]] who just woke up and had a bad case of the morning blues, [[Ork|Orks]] looking for trouble and the Chaos forces on Lorn V.

Sadly, he did not make it to [[Dawn of War#Dark Crusade|Dawn of War: Dark Crusade]], being replaced by some [[General Lucas Alexander|snot-nosed Boy-General]], who laughably tried to imitate his grittiness by finding '''A SINGLE ARM OF SOME RANDOM TITAN WHICH WAS JUST LYING 5 FEET FROM HIS SUPER SECURE AND OUT OF REACH LANDING ZONE.''' That General was Named [[Governor-Militant Lukas Alexander]], if only because Sturnn was elsewhere, possibly busy killing some other enemy of the [[Imperium|Imperium of Man]] with but a glance of his Grit-filled stare.

==Fate==
Some would have you believe that Sturnn died in Winter Assault and the Eldar ending is [[Canon|canon]], but a piece of Imperial Guard wargear in Retribution outright states that General Sturnn did lead his men to the Imperator Titan. In Eldar ending, however, the Imperial Guard ''did'' retake the Titan, but it exploded after overheating, therefore killing everyone near it (except the pointy-ears faggots who had departed back into the [[Webway]]). <s>Yeap, Sturnn included, so he is totally dead</s> His adamantium balls are graded at 0.7 [[Sly Marbo|Sly Marbos]] on the wardian plot-armour scale, as such he is easily capable of surviving something as trivial as an exploding Titan.

However, the FFG [[Only War]] sourcebook ''Hammer of the Emperor'' states that General Sturnn was betrayed by [[Taldeer]] and the Eldar <del>and "cut down in a hail of shuriken fire."</del> {{BLAM|'''BLAM!''' '''HERESY!!!'''}} ''DID YOU NOT JUST READ WHAT IT SAID ABOUT HIS MEDALS?''

Then there's that Eldar campaign intro in Dark Crusade where the narrator hints that the Eldar pitted the Imperial Guard against the Necrons on Lorn V. However, this piece of dialogue only raises more questions than answers (typical). However, there's also the Imperial Guard campaign where Alexander's secondary goal (besides 'liberating' the planet) is hunting down Taldeer and taking her out, and we don't mean on a <del>romantic</del> HERETICAL date. She must've done something ''big''... say, blowing up an irreplaceable war machine that could single-handedly turn the tide of an entire campaign?

Really, who knows. The majority of evidence points to an Eldar victory on Lorn V, but it's highly unlikely that Sturnn would allow himself to be killed by any amount of Space Fairy faggotry, and frankly any notions to that are ridiculous and [[Extra Heresy|extra heretical]].

Actually, it is quite possible that he originally died in Winter Assault (As evidenced by the Taldeer hunt in DC), but then Relic retconned it into him winning (As evidenced by the Retribution Wargear). That, or the Eldar victory had elements of the Imperial Guard victory (as in Sturnn survived and got the Titan Dominatus, albeit heavily damaged due to [[Wraithbone]] shenanigans). So it's really a toss up if you really think about, I'd say that there's a 50/50 chance he was kicking ass at the [[Cadia|Fall of Cadia]].

Speaking from an entirely hypothetical perspective, it would in many ways make sense if [[Gorgutz]] killed him, as he and Taldeer are the only characters that carry over, and it directly shows Sturnn being pulverized by Gorgutz, so this is entirely possible.

Though this too seems unlikely as Gorgutz' only real tactic seems to be runnz away from all dem otha gits. <s>Some Ork warboss amirite?</s> '''*WHAM!*''' Shut it yeh git!
This also only happens in the disorder campaign of Winter Assault, which is definitely non-canon (aside from Gorgutz smashing Lord [[Crull]] and claiming his head).

And if you STILL think he isn't already badass enough, just listen to him [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gVnJH2scIVk address his men.]

{{IG-Characters}}
[[Category: Dawn of War]]

Yvraine

2020-10-27T09:12:49Z

2600:1700:8C93:3110:8DA8:8C97:678E:31C8:

[[File:Yvraine.jpg|350px|right|thumb|Destroyer. Saviour. Herald. Foot fetish incarnate. You are many things Yvraine, and yet you are nothing]]

{{Topquote|Yet, there is a new melody in the galaxy's great song. A harmony unheard by my people for over ten thousand years: Hope. I am the first to hear the voice of the Whispering God. I will not be the last.|Yvraine addressing the Reborn}}

'''Yvraine, Herald of Ynnead''', (often referred to as '''Big Papa Ultrasmurf's Eldar GF''') is an [[Eldar]] who serves as the emissary for the newly awakened Eldar God [[Ynnead]]. While she might not have [[Eldrad]]'s absurd psychic stength or [[Asdrubael Vect|Vect]]'s cunning, Ynnead grants her power over death itself, making her one of the strongest eldar around. Yvraine is also absurdly hard to kill since she's a one-woman army and can [[Vulkan|regenerate]] from most injuries. Her faction, the [[Ynnari]], accept eldar from all walks of life in both the worship of Ynnead, and in the battle against Chaos to try and save their race. Considering this is the race of the biggest self-entitled dicks in the universe who never like being told what to do, leading them all ''at once'' is quite the accomplishment.

She's also happy to work with other races to fight [[Chaos]] when it suits them. Yvraine was [[Cawl|partly]] responsible for the return of [[Roboute Guilliman]], whom she's worked with against the Ruinous Powers several times. Consequently, she's is [[HERESY|shipped]] vigorously with Grandpapa Smurf among certain fans. Her eldar contemporaries experience copious amounts of [[RAGE]] at working with lowly mon'keigh, but she's surprisingly able to reign them in... for now. Regardless, she remains a massive thorn in [[Slaanesh]]'s disgusting backside, as Ynnead protects eldar souls from being eaten by She Who Thirsts.

She also shares her name with Yvraine from Warhammer Fantasy Battle (the daughter of the Everqueen and Aenarion), though crossover names like that [[Magnus|are nothing new]]. The Fantasy version of Yvraine has a brother, Morelion (who is the ancestor of [[Tyrion]] and [[Teclis]]), and is the ancestor to Alarielle, the current Everqueen.

== Early History ==

Yvraine was originally born on [[Biel-Tan|Craftworld Biel-Tan]], which could explain where she got her fighting skills from. However, her first path was the Path of the Dancer. At some point, she found she had psychic ability, and thus she took the Path of the [[Warlock (Eldar)|Seer]], becoming a Warlock. However, she had a mercurial mood, and developed a bloodlust that led her to follow the path of the Warrior among the [[Aspect Warrior#Dire Avengers|Dire Avengers]].

After awhile, even this wasn't enough for her and she left Craftworld Biel-Tan as an Outcast and eventually became a famed [[Eldar#Eldar Corsairs|Corsair]] leader. This continued for a time until a mutiny forced her, and those among her crew still loyal, to flee into the Webway. From here there was only one place to go; Commorragh. Here she made her way living and fighting in the slums before joining a [[Wyches|Wych]] cult and then rising to become a [[Succubi|Succubus]] under the patronage of Lady Malys. Unknown to her, [[Visarch|the Exarch]] she had served under had become so devoted to her that he had shed his war mask and followed her to Commoragh by disguising himself as an [[Incubi|Incubus]] (which is something they are not normally able to do, since Exarchs come into being when they become lost in their respective paths).

So yeah, she gets around. Even has a pretty boy or two chasing after her.

== Yvraine's Rebirth ==

Yvraine's rebirth came about during a major gladiator match in Commorragh. It was here that Yvraine (aided by the patronage of [[Lady Malys]]) was to face off against [[Lelith Hesperax]] herself. To raise the stakes, they would be fighting among Wyches, [[Tyranids]] and other captives or monsters in a massive free for all. It was such a momentous event that [[Asdrubael Vect|Vect]] himself had arrived to watch (from the comfort of his private portable pyramid/command base/mansion).

The fight between Yvraine and Lelith was breathtaking, even the Harlequins in the audience were stunned. It was clear though that Lelith was toying with Yvraine and was clearly the better fighter... until Yvraine managed to get a cut on Lelith's forearm. However, this was a ruse that Lelith had allowed as part of her plan to draw out the fight and make it more entertaining for her patron, Asdrubael Vect. But the punch to the stomach that Yvraine dealt Lelith was not part of the plan. Yvraine got super pissed and entered berserk mode that caused Lelith to start giving ground and, after getting in a vicious stomp on Lelith she led her to a pile of Tyranid corpses. In a nifty display of [[Just As Planned]], Yvraine lost her footing after one of the corpses she was fighting on had a death spasm and Lelith used the opening to stab Yvraine through the sternum before darting off to a new opponent and leaving her for dead.

Despite her wound Yvraine fought, trying to not show weakness in the arena. But even her red attire couldn't hide the blood trailing down her chest. At one point she crossed paths with [[Wat|a priestess of]] [[Morai-Heg]] with needle-like blades. She proved surprisingly quick, even severing one of Yvraine's hands. In spite of her wounds, she still managed to take the priestess with her and ripped the priestess' throat out with her teeth.

That's right, Yvraine's so tough she kept fighting, even though she'd been STABBED IN THE CHEST AND LOST A HAND. Proving herself nearly as hardcore as the average Imperial Guardsman.

It was at this moment, while Yvraine was at the brink of death, that the newly born but weak Ynnead recognized Yvraine as one who had walked on both the Paths of the Eldar and the Paths of Damnation, and so revived her as his Emissary. Unfortunately, the psychic energy released in the process also broke [[Khaine]]'s Gate open, flooding Commoragh with [[Daemons#Warhammer_40.2C000|daemons]] and thoroughly humiliating Vect. Needless to say, Vect now wanted Yvraine dead (again) ''immediately''. Trueborn from the [[Kabal of the Black Heart]] (looking to save face after Vect's retreat) headed towards Yvraine, seeking her death while her Wych Cult and the Visarch (who had been hiding in the crowd) rushed to aid her. Even Wyches from the Cult of Strife turned up, ordered by Lelith to help Yvraine for reasons of her own.

As they left the arena, Yvraine had another surprise. A ship, her flagship from her Corsair days, had returned to Commorragh. The crew took Yvraine, the Visarch and the survivors on before fleeing for the [[Webway]]. But Vect wasn't so easily thwarted. He sealed the Webway passages, and the ship got wedged in one. As Kabalites from the Kabal of the Black Heart tried to cut their way in, Yvraine loaded the Visarch along with as many crew and warriors as they could onto [[Raider]]s and [[Venom]]s, had them launched from the bridge, while the rest of the crew stayed behind willingly, [[Noblebright|sacrificing themselves]] to delay [[Grimdark|Vect's revenge, which involved rape and torture monsters and their tentacle beasts]] in the hope of preserve their people's hope for salvation (Nobledark in 40K, more common than you think).

== Forming the [[Ynnari]] ==

Yvraine fled Commorragh with her old Exarch (who had since renamed himself the [[Visarch]]), the Incubus warriors he had become the leader of since he arrived in Commoragh, the survivors of her crew and several members of her Wych Cult. They wandered the Webway for a time, fleeing the [[Haemonculus|Haemonculi cults]] and Kabalites Vect had sent after them. They met up with a group of Harlequins, who led them through the Webway and kept them one step ahead of Vect's agents.

=== Return to Biel-Tan ===

Accompanied by the newly-formed Ynnari, Yvraine returned to Biel-Tan, the Craftworld of her birth. However, not all eldar were happy to see the return of this prodigal daughter. This 'family reunion' ended with the fracturing of Biel-Tan.

=== Battle in the Webway ===

In the Webway, they were waylaid by the Prodigal Sons, Ahriman's Chaos Warband. In an astonishing display of power, [[Ahriman]] managed to teleport Yvraine, the Visarch and the [[Yncarne]] out of the Webway into Tzeentch's crystal labyrinth with where they froze due to the implication that [[Tzeentch|the big blue bird himself]] was there and merely gazing upon him would destroy their sanity. The Tzeentchian assault on Ynnari forces including the trio, [[Harlequins]], [[Dark Eldar]] and [[Eldrad]] was saved only by the timely intervention of [[Phoenix Lords]] led by [[Jain Zar]].

While trapped in Tzeentch-town, Yvraine called out to Ahriman, saying she had "what he was seeking". To prove her point, Yvraine used her powers to [[Awesome|restore a dozen Rubric Marines to their former selves]]. Overcome with emotion, Ahriman returned Yvraine, the Visarch and the Yncarne to the battle. However, to take him from the battle, Yvraine then had a [[Wraithknight]] smash a hole in the Webway, [[Troll|sucking those recovered Rubric Marines into the Warp]]. Horrified, Ahriman fled after them on a Disc of Tzeentch.

In the battle both the Yncarne and the Phoenix Lords went MIA. Yvraine would later show the ability to summon the Yncarne again, so long as there was enough death happening in the immediate area.

=== A Desperate Alliance ===

At this point the Ynnari joined together to enact another desperate plan: Eldrad had forseen that the Eldar's and the Imperium's fates were joined. For the Eldar to survive they would have to ally with the [[Imperium]], this time for real.

To facilitate this, they picked up the survivors from the fall of [[Cadia]] (minus [[Creed]], who had already been taken by [[Trazyn the Infinite|Trazyn]]). Then, after a good word from [[Belisarius Cawl|Cawl]], [[Saint Celestine|Celestine]] and [[Inquisitor Greyfax|Greyfax]] to explain their intentions, they headed to Macragge. There, Yvraine and Cawl worked together to heal [[Roboute Guilliman]] of his poison and bring him back to life.

After promising an alliance, the Eldar and the forces of the Imperium parted ways, with Guilliman thanking Yvraine for helping him and Yvraine giving Guilliman a sincere caution and no stereotypical Eldar dickery (something quite a few shippers have seized on, though this would be more ironic than Taldeer and LIIVI, given that Yvraine is the herald of a god and Roboute is implied to despise religion, though this is a combo of the [[Imperial Truth]] creed and Roboute's [[Rage|reaction]] to the [[Ecclesiarchy]] worshiping [[Emperor of Mankind|Big E]]).

=== Hand of Darkness ===

Whilst the [[Plague Wars]] were raging in [[Ultramar]] it came to the attention of Guilliman that [[Mortarion]] was using an artifact known as the Hand of Darkness to spread diseases ([[Blood_Ravens|yes, the same one the Imperium "lost" in the 12th Black Crusade]]). Knowing that the artifact was well-known to the Eldar and that they had a common interest in seeing it out of Chaos' hands, Guilliman requested the aid of Eldrad and Yvraine to retrieve it, having [[Varro Tigurius]] supply the Eldar with its location as the Imperium had been able to locate it whilst the Eldar had not. Armed with the knowledge that the Hand lay within the domain of [[Nurgle]] himself, Yvraine went to the [[Black_Library#In_Warhammer_40.2C000|Black Library]] in order to find a method to safely enter it. After battling against the [[Thousand Sons]], facing off against Ahriman again, and overcoming a test along with the Visarch, Yvraine gained access to something known as the Rose of [[Isha]] and, using it, created a safe passage into the [[Eye of Terror]]. Following this path she and her party located the Hand of Darkness, slew its guardian, and fled with it.

After escaping with the Hand of Darkness the White Seers of the Black Library offered to take it and destroy it, claiming that no good could come from using Chaos Artefacts. Clearly they had never met [[Logan Grimnar]], [[Marneus Calgar]] or [[Kaldor Draigo]] who have all, several times, used Chaos Artefacts for good. However, Yvraine refused them, insisting that she had to return the Hand of Darkness to Guilliman.

=== Craftworld Zaisuthra ===

Shortly after giving the Hand of Darkness to Eldrad so he can send it to Guilliman, Yvraine was contacted by Iyanna Arienal, who had heard that a long-lost Craftworld known as Zaisuthra appeared to have returned after it had left the galaxy. Along with an [[Iyanden]] Wraithhost, the Ynnari went to investigate the craftworld, mainly because legend had it that it contained a webway portal to the Tomb of Eldanesh, which Yvraine suspected could be the location of the final Cronesword.

Although the inhabitants of the Craftworld were friendly at first, it was eventually revealed that it was infected by [[Genestealer|Genestealers]]: the Craftworld had left the galaxy before the [[Infinity Circuit]] technology could be spread and the ancestors of the Craftworld's inhabitants chose to submit to the Broodmind in order to preserve their souls from [[Slaanesh]]. As the hybrids that now constituted the Craftworld's population were running out of resources, their plan was to use Iyanna Arienal to spread their infection to Iyanden, manipulating her into joining the Broodmind by preying on her desire for a family (her original family being killed and their soulstones shattered when a torpedo struck Iyanden - and distant relatives of said family residing in Zaisuthra). Their plan turned against them when Yvraine and Iyanna were able to summon the Yncarne into the Broodmind, who then proceeded to devour the souls of most of the Craftworld and slay the Genestealer Patriarch (which had somehow absorbed the power of the Craftworld's Avatar) leading the hybrids.

Yvraine then took the gate to the Tomb of Eldanesh. Finding themselves in what appeared to be the Eldar homeworld, thought lost during the [[War in Heaven]], they discovered that the tomb did not house the Cronesword but instead the Warshard, the most powerful [[Avatar of Khaine]] of them all, who wielded Anaris itself and whose presence was enough to drive most of the Ynnari forces into a team-killing frenzy. It was defeated, but at the cost of a third of the Ynnari's forces. Meliniel, a Biel-Tan [[Autarch]] who essentially acts as Yvraine's second-in-command, was able to bind the Warshard into himself using a gem made of Eldanesh's blood and transform into Khaine's Avatar at will, so now the Ynnari have their very own Avatar of Khaine. Shame you can't have one in an Ynnari army though. (¿Porque GeeDubs?) Plus, it cost them a third of their forces.

=== Tomb-World Agarimethea ===

Following the events on Zaisuthra and the Tomb of Eldanesh, Yvraine sent Druthkhala (a former Drukhari Wych) to act as an ambassador on [[Craftworld Saim-Hann]]. This was mainly to conscript the aid of the Wild Rider Clans in order to investigate Agarimethea; a maiden world formerly host to a population of eldar Exodites who mysteriously vanished and host to an ancient aeldari vault rumored to contain relics from before the Fall. Nuadhu Fireheart, heir to the declining Clan Fireheart and Wild Rider Lord, offered the services of his Wild Riders with the not-so-discreet intention of wooing Druthkhala (who, when no clans officially offered their support, had to settle with that). During their investigation, Nuadhu accidentally triggered a dormant Necron Tomb complex which promptly began awakening its inhabitants to kill the Ynnari/Saim-Hann coalition.

Upon realizing what they'd (specifically Nuadhu) done, Druthkhala and Nuadhu are forced to petition the rest of Saim-Hann's clans for aid in destroying the Tomb-Complex. Most of the clans dismiss the issue, namely due to their distrust in the Ynnari and seers in general (Eldrad's stunt to summon Ynnead and the fracture of Biel-Tan don't help their case) and remain highly divided on how/if they want to even deal with the Necrons. Despite the Firehearts pressing the issue that Agarimethea is within spitting distance of Saim-Hann and the threat a fully awakened tomb world presents to the greater whole of their people. After a recess in the proceedings, Nuadhu calls those opposed to taking action on Agarimethea cowards (which, of course, Saim-Hann eldar happen to value honor literally more than life itself) which results in an honor duel to determine who's in the right. Druthkhala champions the Firehearts after throwing some more shade on their champion (who was originally opposed to an outsider participating until she called him weak), only for Nuadhu to forfeit the duel upon realizing Druthkhala intended to kill the opposing champion (as duels typically end after first blood). This forfeit fully eradicated any chance of Saim-Hann fully supporting the Ynnari's efforts on Agarimethea, so a pissed Druthkhala left to inform Yvraine of the turn in events.

After a meeting with Clan Fireheart and Nuadhu, Yvraine and Eldrad pressure the seers of Saim-Hann into aiding their efforts (despite how little weight the Saim-Hann seers have among the clans). A multi-pronged assault on Agarimethea between the Ynnari, Wild Riders, Fireheart Clan and their closest allies is set in motion to "smash and grab" whatever relics may be in the vault and use them to end the Tomb-World. Despite a necron null field suppressing Ynnead's influence on the Ynnari, the assault seemingly goes well until Yvraine and the Wild Riders reach the vault.

Turns out it wasn't a vault. Instead, it was a sealed portal into the warp ''filled'' with Slaaneshi deamons (including Deamon Princes heavily implied to be of Aeldari origin, food for thought there), which began to attack both the eldar and necrons present. Despite a number of the Saim-Hann forces wanting to say "fuck it" and let them kill each other eternally, Eldrad drops the bomb that Agarimethea is one of several such complexes in the immediate area: within two years the necron/deamon war will envelop no less than the entire solar system (as numerous nearby worlds also host necrons and prison-vaults of their own) and will wipe out Saim-Hann in the process if not stopped immediately. A desperate final assault is attempted on the portal only for the necrons to intercept and redirect the war host to their Phaerakh, who offers a truce in exchange for their aid in sealing the vault-prison. An accord is struck and the Ynnari-Necron alliance makes solid progress against the ever increasing tide of daemons, in no small part due to an unleashed C'Tan shard and Meliniel transforming into the Warshard (arguably the only real instance of an Avatar of Khaine being used ''successfully''). Yvraine, in an effort to fully turn the tide in their favor, takes the soul of Caelledhin Icewhisper's mother (the Fireheart Chieftain's lover whose soul he personally was housing) and uses it to reconnect to Ynnead and summon the Yncarne to battle.

Despite all this, it's still not quite enough to fully press into the vault-prison. The additional knowledge that an eldar with the blood of one who'd opened the portal must be sacrificed in order to close it stirs Caelledhin Icewhisper (Nuadhu's half-sister) to hop on a jetbike and suicide rush the portal, closing it and ending the daemon incursion at the cost of her life. Yvraine and Eldrad apprehensively approach the Phaerakh to ask what what comes next. The Phaerakh, known as The Watcher in the Dark, reveals she doesn't have any plans to leave and conquer other worlds as her sole charge is to make sure the vault-prisons she guards stays shut. To that extent, she lifts the null field and allows the eldar to leave on the condition they stay away, a condition the Ynnari and Saim-Hann eldar are content to accept.

This whole ordeal cost Yvraine a good number of Ynnari lives with nothing to show for it and garnered no good will amongst the majority of Saim-Hann's clans, so the events that took place on Agarimethea arguably were a grand waste of time and resources on her part.

=== Blood of the Phoenix ===

With the opening of the Great Rift (or the Dathedian, as the eldar call it), Yvraine's troubles only seem to have been exacerbated. During a return trip to Saim-Hann in order to directly appeal to several of the chieftains present, Drazhar and a band of his Incubi mercenaries slipped into the craftworld through a webway portal directly into the glade the Ynnari and Chieftains were convening in that the denizens of Saim-Hann somehow completely forgot existed (you'd think the leaders of Saim-Hann would know their home well enough to keep track of a webway portal leading ''directly'' into the heart of the craftworld). Contracted by Vect to kill Yvraine, Drazhar made quick work of several of the local autarchs before Jain-Zar and her Howling Banshees arrived to reenforce the Ynnari and Saim-Hann defenders. Drazhar and what remained of his strike force fell back and retreated into an abandoned ruin of a city called Shaa-dom. It was here where he waited and ambushed the still-pursuing Jain-Zar, whom he killed after stunning her with a deluge of tormented psionic screams from the Howling Banshee spirit stones he'd collected. Yvraine, who'd fled to a remote craftworld known as Zandros, saw her death through a vision and beseeched Ynnead to do something to help the only Phoenix Lord who'd thus far bothered to directly champion her. Back in Shaa-dom, An exarch named Qintui'yenh was revived, who then donned the Phoenix Lord's armor to revive Jain-Zar and escaped through a derelict portal that (rather conveniently) led her directly to Zandros and Yvraine. Suspecting some of her Drukhari followers of treachery, Yvraine told all her followers of her plan to scour Zandros for a portal to Belial IV, where she was confident the final cronesword lay. Her suspicions were soon proven when Drazhar, angry that his trophy kill got up and walked away, soon appeared to kill Jain-Zar (again) and actually finish his original contract to kill Yvraine. This time, Jain-Zar managed to best Drazhar and beheaded the father of the Incubi. Despite Yvraine's enthusiastic accolades and hopes to lead the Ynnari to a bright future, Jain-Zar (literally) bowed out and left without another word.

=== Phoenix Rising ===

Drazhar wasn't the only big name trying to hunt down Yvraine during this time either. Slaanesh, tired of getting blue-balled by Ynnead, sent a daemon by the name of Shalaxi Helbane to hunt down and slay Ynnead's champion. Shalaxi's first attempt nearly succeeded, attacking Yvraine as she and her congregation were puddle-jumping through the webway and slaughtering most of the warhost before Yvraine managed to slip away. A sore loser, and to prove that the Ynnari can never ''truly'' win, Shalaxi gave the fleeing Yvraine a vision of the final cronesword, which had indeed been on Belial IV. Only now it was in Slaanesh's palace, with Slaanesh likely using it to masturbate furiously over how hard he cucked Yvraine and Ynnead by getting to it first. Yvraine steeled herself and led what remained of her convoy to a maiden world known as Iathglas, where through Yvraine's behest, fate or absolute, unyielding boredom, a massive gathering of craftworlders, corsairs, harlequins, drukhari and even exodites was forming. It was here where all the eldar factions began bickering for ''literal'' weeks with Yvraine trying to guide them towards the first steps of a complete alliance between all the eldar to inspire her naysayers to Ynnead's cause. In classic daemonic fashion, on the sixth hour of the sixth day of the sixth week, Shalaxi and a massive Slaaneshi daemon invasion assaulted the world. While the majority of the eldar armies fought off the daemon horde, Shalaxi proceeded to fight Lelith Hesparax, Jain-Zar, a Solitaire, the Visarch and Yvraine simultaneously. With ludicrous ease, Shalaxi cut the Solitaire in half and [[Rape|impaled the Visarch]] before slitting open Yvraine's throat. Before Shalaxi could finish her off, Yvraine drew energy from the world spirit to summon the Yncarne, with whom they were finally able to banish Shalanxi and the daemonic host. After healing the Visarch, but before the eldar could celebrate their combined victory, [[Wat|Shalaxi briefly reappeared to inform them that it wasn't actually fighting at full power and was just testing them]]. The daemon then left to hunt Yvraine another day, with the various eldar factions, despite having moments ago been ready to celebrate their teamwork, fell back to arguing who's fault it was they didn't actually get a win, thus choosing to fully believe the words of an agent of their Arch Enemy who they just soundly defeated, and said Arch Enemy who's known for lying and manipulating people without questioning it in the slightest.

== Relationship with the [[Visarch]] ==

Though Yvraine does not know it, the Visarch is actually her former Exarch and Mentor who, possibly, has romantic feelings for her. Despite this, and despite being her self-appointed bodyguard, in their actual interactions and discussion the two get along very poorly and are prone to snapping at each other. They have three times already drawn their swords on each other and threatened to kill each other, and only two of those times were they under the influence of Daemons. The Visarch strongly dislikes what he calls Yvraine acting as Guilliman's lapdog and pet, accusing her in the Gardens of Nurgle of being nothing more than a minion of the Imperium. Yvraine ...doesn't have much to say against this as she fears he is right*, but is angered by it nonetheless. It says a lot about the Eldar that helping save an ally who asked for help causes them to think this way. Clearly they don’t actually understand what an alliance is. The whole “we help each other” thing seems rather lost on them. To Yvraine's and the Visarch's credit, perhaps the fear they hold isn't directly the fear that they are somehow humiliating themselves by cooperating with Guilliman, but leaving the Xenophobic Imperium of Man, whom the Eldar have had several conflicts with and whom Guilliman isn't in complete control of (as evidenced by the continued existence of the Ecclesiarchy, the High Lords of Terra, and the Imperial Creed) in a position to betray the Eldar and wipe them out or otherwise seal their doom. It would be fitting with the overall character of the Eldar to discuss a horrifying and discomforting truth in a way that allows them the pretense of superiority and control. Except that the Imperium has spent ten thousand years habitually NOT backstabbing aliens specifically so they can point out how treacherous xenos are. If you have a point then it is that the Eldar are in a position where they are starting to realize they could very easily reap what they have sown from ten millennia of douchbaggery. Perhaps Guilliman’s charisma and sheer presence is enough for now. Besides, they should know by now that doing what a Primarch says is a wonderful way to pretty much always win at everything. Especially the one specially created for planning and leadership.

In any case, believing that stopping the spread and creation of interstellar undead plagues is being a "lapdog" is...oh, God-Emperor that is so stupid. Then again it's not like the 'alliance' has stopped the Imperium and Eldar from killing each other across the galaxy (between Imperium and Eldar, not Imperium and Ynnari generally except by accident since neither side is big on talking and co-ordinating with each other), and the whole "awakening of Ynnead" bit was almost halted by the uninvited Deathwatch (because it would've killed billions of people via orbital bombardment of meteors by destroying the crystal moon the ritual was being performed on). In short, though technically allies, the Eldar haven’t stopped being meddling douchbags. It’s just that now they do it openly and are surprised when the Imperium shoots them for whatever dickery they just did.

Time will tell if the two can forge a closer working relationship but, for the moment at least, both of Ynnead's foremost servants are far from friendly with each other. The "Belligerent Sexual Tension" trope anyone?

== Gallery ==

<gallery>
File:Yvraine by 냉동고등어.jpg|S-Shut up [[Roboute Guilliman|Girlyman]]! Me reviving you doesn't mean I l-like you or anything! [https://www.pixiv.net/member_illust.php?mode=medium&illust_id=62270909 source]
File:Yvraine-Emissary-of-Ynnead.jpg
File:Warhammer by overyall-db5owp4.jpg
Image:YvraineXGuilliman.png|The real reason for the Imperium-Eldar alliance.
Image:YvraineMeshi.jpg|Even [[Dungeon Meshi]] gets in on the fun.
Image:Roboute_and_Yvraine_by_Magnifigal_2.PNG|Roboute and Yvraine's relationship goes back a long, ''long'' time.
Image:WarCom-Thanksgiving.jpg|Even Warhammer Community is getting in on the Heresy!
</gallery>

[[Category: Warhammer 40,000]]

[[Category: Xenos]]

[[Category: Eldar]]

[[Category: Ynnari]]

{{Eldar-Characters}}

{{Ynnari-Characters}}