2d4chan - User contributions [en]

Proxy

2016-07-30T04:22:16Z

2601:285:104:EAC0:B546:455B:1C5F:E921: /* Random objects */

{{skub}}

In general, a "proxy" is a substitute or go-between. For example, a proxy server takes web page requests from a computer and transmits in on their behalf, and then passes the resulting page back. Using [[meme|seven of them at once]] yields a similar level of defense as sitting in the middle of the [[Iron Warriors|Iron Cage]].

== Proxy models ==

In [[wargames]], "proxy" is used as a verb: to "proxy" a model means to use some other model to represent it. For example, [[Jokaero]] look rather silly, but [[AT-43]] Karmans look way cool, and they're made to the same scale, so people can and do use them as substitutes. Or, for another, Dark Eldar Mandrakes have awesome models, but crappy rules, so people like to use their models to represent other, better units.

In tabletop terms there are a variety of different approaches to proxying stuff but they fall into three major schools of thought (presented in glorious technicolour and descending order of quality/respectability):

=== Conversion ===
This is the practice of using existing models and making modifications to create either a personalised version of the original, or a different vehicle entirely. In either case the reason is normally to make better looking minis than are officially offered. Very minor conversions are extremely common, as practically all players like to customise their dudes and tanks to some degree and most modern plastic kits are built to be flexible and interchangeable so that minor conversions are as simple as gluing on different bits. More aggressive conversions can involve jamming together bits from multiple kits (known as kitbashing) or using practically no official parts of models at all (known as scratch building). Conversions that build from a single kit are practically always acceptable, and kitbashed or scratchbuilt models are normally fine as long as it's clear what they are supposed to be, what things they have on them and they fit the aesthetic. Various companies make conversion kits and parts to work with/around 40k models and specifically to fill in the gaps in terms of weapon options which are either never officially offered or only available from forge world. Of course for Orks you can pretty much please yourself.

=== Other miniatures ===
This is fairly simple approach where you buy models (either from the same game or another) that look better or are cheaper and use them to represent something else. The key to finding acceptance in this school is in finding models that actually work in context. Being in the right scale is critical, and matching the aesthetic of the army is fairly important, you may get away with a Gundam model in a [[Tau]] army, but [[Space Marines]]? Not so much. Using single minis or a small group of them to represent specific things (characters or veteran units) is generally ok, they often look better or are way, way, WAY cheaper, and in friendly/unofficial games NOBODY is going to give a single fuck if you're not using Cadians, Catachan or the like to represent your Imperial Guardsmen (Seriously, 30$ for a box of ten Guardsmen).

=== Random objects ===

This is normally the go-to for young or poor (or cheap) gamers playing friendly games, and even for veteran grown ups to test of how expensive things play without having to buy the units in question. Obviously these are deeply uncool, but at the same time if its what you have to do to play a game then beggars can't be choosers. Certainly 'official' games can't be played in this manner, but then again if you are doing this you almost certainly don't need to worry about playing those games. It's certainly not unheard of for big games like Apocalypse to be played with 95% of the forces as some kind of proxy simply because people want to play the game but it'll take thousands of pounds and months of diligent modeling and painting to make the forces most of which won't ever see the table again. Whole games can be played with proxies in this fashion (this gamer suggests using paper instead of random objects so you can write on them so you can't lose track of stuff) because we all get bored and since you're a gamer going outside or meeting attractive women is pretty unrealistic so you do what you gotta do. The absolute master of the random object stand in is the paper warhound titan, plans of which can be found on goggle. Print it out, cut along the dots, fold and tuck in the flaps and boom; a to scale titan.
[[Image:Coke_pods.jpg|thumb|right|Look at this. GW LOOK AT THIS.]]
The degree to which this practice is accepted officially depends on the company and setting. Battlefront Miniatures (makers of [[Flames of War]]) is pretty chill about proxies, while [[Games Workshop]] forbids them from their official tournaments and stores.

The skill of the conversion can make or break the acceptance: a [[Land Raider]] masterfully built out of Lego bricks (or a whole army, like [https://secure.flickr.com/photos/jerac/sets/72157625354017872 this one]) will likely be accepted (and maybe even complimented), while a Land Raider represented by a juice box probably won't.

One of the most common things to do is to proxy Drop pods with soda cans, they're about the same size, don't ever move, functionally useless once they hit the board, and most hobby stores at least sell soda, so they're readily available for younger players.

==Trading Card Games==

In many casual groups for TCGs (most notably Magic: The Gathering), a proxy card is a card that [[counts as]] another card. There's a couple of situations where this is relevant to the way people play.

* For deck testing, proxies are a fact of life. A group of people all need to be able to test any card available but actually getting hold of them can be extremely hard especially when a new set is released. When you stack that up with decks that they need to test against but won't be playing, the costs just keep going up. So proxies are what gets used a lot of the time to make sure that you can cover all the bases quickly and easily.
* There are tournaments (especially in extremely old formats where cards can be hilarious expensive, upwards of thousands of dollars) where proxies are in fact allowed. While these tend not to be official WoTC ones, they are still big, well organised events with very large prize pools. In these cases they generally let you proxy a set number of cards to try and get more people playing. That generally works because people always want to play Magic and especially the furiously complex formats where they can demonstrate their mental acuity (or lack of it) but can't spring the ten grand for a deck.
* In casual formats proxies are occasionally allowable. Many groups who play commander allow for a set number of proxies, either to keep the circle fresh and let people try things or to keep costs down in what can be an expensive format too. Similarly when people put together Cube sets they might use proxies too. Depending on how and why they do it, this is either very cool or very not cool. If it's because you won't shell out the eight bucks for a rare then that's not cool. When you do it to add 'power' to the cube without adding an extra few grand to the price tag, that's normally fine.

A side case for this are the really sexy, well produced proxies that some people have come out with. They are often as nice as official cards, although you can tell the difference. If you proxy using these kind of things then they become a LOT more acceptable. A borderless Jace, full art Dual Lands or any card with its modern text is almost always acceptable outside of the sanctioned formats. People sneer at proxies because they detract from the feel of the game. If a proxy looks sexy and conveys the right feel of power and awesome, as opposed to "feeling like a proxy", then no-one complains.

Additionally proxies help people be freer with who they play their cube with. These cards cost a LOT of money. Like two months salary lots of money. But they are small and very easily lost, damaged or stolen. When you play with people you trust then it's not that big of a deal, but you need eight to draft and sometimes that means you end up with friends of friends, or just that guy you met at a GP. Having a set of proxies for most/all of the expensive cards means you don't need to worry about that. The expensive stuff stays at home, while everyone still gets the same kind of fun from the experience. We're not screwing around when we say these things are expensive. A cube is something like 700 cards. Many of them will cost a few bucks, some will cost tens and some may cost hundreds. This is a stack of cards that will cost over a thousand dollars at a minimum, and often closer to five thousand, potentially up to tens of thousands. I hate to keep harping on it, but it's true. Proxies let you protect your investment from dicks and sticky fingers, and people understand that.

==Notable Proxies==
These proxies have a special place in [[Neckbeard|our]] hearts, mostly for their [[FAIL|ubiquitous horrendousness]]:

[[File:2003-10-09-012 soda.gif|200px|thumb|right|Proxies can also be an endless source of amusement.]]
* ''Soda cans/bottles:'' The infamous carbonated Drop Pod. New or cheap 40k players often use these, sometimes two or three at a time. Anyone who even thinks of using them in tournaments will have [[Indrick Boreale|multiple simultaneous and devastating offensive boots]] [[Butthurt|shoved up their buttocks.]]
* ''Toy tanks:'' Any suitably scaled Tiger II or Sherman can and has been proxied for any other tank in any other game. Notably, [[Leman Russ Battle Tank|Leman Russes]] and [[Land Raider|Land Raiders]] are the most egregious proxy offenders both due to GW's outrageous prices, and lazy design, (hold a Land Raider model and a Mark V side by side some time)
* ''Game non-specific models:'' Some people try to cash in on other peoples' need for cheap models. These often look neat, and tend to hold enough respect that their owners can get away with only having about two tanks. And using them in every game. For every system. ALWAYS.

==See Also==
* [[Counts As]], where an old unit is used as a proxy for a new one

Lasgun

2016-07-13T21:30:37Z

2601:285:104:EAC0:B546:455B:1C5F:E921: /* Why the Lasgun is still being used */

[[Image:Guardsman.jpg|thumb|right|This is painfully accurate. Unlike the fucking lasgun. And the sad truth is, that it would probably do more damage than the actual gun.]]
[[Image:lasgun.jpg|thumb|right|Standard Cadian pattern Lasgun]]
[[image:KHARN LOEV FLASHLIGHT.jpg|thumb|right|[[Kharn]] also love <strike>Flashlight</strike>LASGUN!!]]
[[image:1271099410879.jpg|thumb|right|The closest thing to choice an Imperial guardsmen will have - what sort of lasgun he'll get (not an actual choice, generally speaking).]]

The humble (and we mean humble) '''Lasgun''' is the standard-issue armament of the average [[Imperial Guard]]sman in the [[Warhammer 40,000]] setting. Given the incalculable number of Guardsmen under arms and the sheer scale of the [[Imperium]] itself, it is safe to say that the lasgun is probably the most common weapon in the entire galaxy that isn't some underhive piece of junk like stub guns, knives or other miscellaneous weapon.

The name is rather obviously a portmanteau of "laser" and "gun", but argument [[rage]]s [[skub|over how the word is meant to be pronounced]]. Many claim that the "las" should be pronounced "layz" (or in other words say that it's pronounced with a long "a", as the first part of "laser"), but others contend that this sounds retarded, and "lazz-gun" (or a short "a" sound, as in "glass") is a better pronunciation. According to [[Games Workshop]], its name is pronounced "Laze-gun", however, Jeremy Vetock and Duncan Rhodes both say "Lazzguns," so it really is a toss up. (And unimportant).

It is almost universally described in the [[fluff]] as discharging with a sharp crack (caused by the beam ionizing the air it travels through), but some authors describe the lasround as either a "bolt" as in Star Wars or as a "beam" as in Dawn of War. Other features of the weapon have greater variation - some [[Black Library]] works and items such as the [[Imperial Infantryman's Uplifting Primer]] describe the weapon as possessing a fully automatic firing setting, this feature is represented by Rapid Fire rule on the tabletop, but not represented in Dark Heresy - this can be explained away by virtue of the fact that there are many different patterns of Lasgun produced throughout the Imperium.

There is also some dispute as to the color of the "beam". Some fluff claims it to be blue, while games like Dawn of War portray it as red or something of a reddish-yellow. The popular ''Gaunt's Ghosts'' series of novels by [[Dan Abnett]] say that the Imperial weapons fire blue "beams", while the Chaos weapons fire red ones. In order to fix this [[Skub|mess]], we have proposed a Scientific fact on the issue...

*The Fact: the energy of each individual photon is determined by the frequency (i.e. colour), the power output is therefore 'photons per second'. This means the colour comes from frequency, not power output. So the colour is the laser beam scattering off bits of stuff in the air. If the beam is too high a frequency to be seen, then it could ionize the air, creating a beam of light as the electrons return to their atoms. The colour of light produced depends on the gasses that make up the atmosphere so the laser would be different colours on different planets! Or they could be infrared in which case they can't be seen no matter what. On the other hand, it is possible that they might fire a tight, lower-energy beam nearly concurrently with the actual damaging beam as a sort of "tracer round". This could be adjusted to certain wavelengths to produce specific colors, which might serve friend-or-foe identification purposes, to tell from which side the shots are coming from. Well, even if it is infrared, if the beam is condensed enough, ambient photons will be deflected off of the stream of photons being projected, making the beam visible. Besides, it's DAoT, ain't gotta explain.

== Why the Lasgun sucks ==

IT'S NOT A LASER! IT'S A LITTLE LIGHT BULB THAT BLINKS! - Guardsman Woody.

The lasgun is [[Derp|rather pathetic]] [[Grimdark|compared to the mainline arms and armour of most of the other armies of the setting]], useful only by virtue of the fact that Guardsmen come in ridiculous numbers (except in comparison to Tyranids or Orks) and the application of statistical probability. The weapons are often derisively referred to as "flashlights," based on their individual uselessness, although this is arguably more of an example of how ridiculously tough everything else is in the setting.

The 6th Edition rulebook describes the lasgun as severing limbs at close range but further away it only goes about as deep as the liver, explosively flash-boiling said liver and all other squishy bits in the laser's path. They are on the same level of effectiveness as autoguns (which are basically AK-47s IN SPACE), except lasguns are even more durable, reliable, accurate (due to low to no recoil and the fact that the beam is not affected by gravity or wind, though shooting though a dust cloud or fog on the other hand is more problematic, so a B over all for atmospheric effects) and less dependent on massive ammo supplies; a single power-pack can, depending on the gun's setting, afford up to 100 to 140 shots, while an autogun magazine is usually 20-30 bullets (which, fun fact, is generally what typical lasguns set to max power usually can fire.) Plus you can recharge their batteries from Chimera generators, sunlight or even fire, while an autogun is useless once out of ammo for anything other than a fancy club or if you have the good fortune to have a bayonet, a vaguely sharp stick. Not that said bayonet on either weapon will help against orks or 'nids. And given the general competence of Munitorum depots, you'd probably end up with ration packs instead of ammunition, though this of course applies to lasgun power-packs, as well.

Combine this with most lasguns seeming to come pre-set to "medium power" (granting between 40 and 80 shots a pack on average not often not sufficient against anything besides clothes or a flak uniform's non-rigid bits,) and many places not bothering to actually include how to adjust power as part of basic training - probably (rightly) assuming the soldier won't live long enough for it to matter - and you end up with what amounts to the energy weapon equivalent of an especially snappy pomeranian.

Note: it's possible the lasgun doesn't work simply because the beam is not focused properly; in a wide variety of lasers, the beam is coherent (all the photons travel practically parallel of each other) only for a few meters, after which the beam is so scattered that it basically becomes a flashlight. Someone should tell the Martian high Cheese to correct this by putting some other lenses up in this shit.

== Why the Lasgun is still being used ==

Although better known as a "flashlight", some players also call it "The AK-47 of the 41st Millennium", albeit ironically. Instead of being reliable, tough, relatively inaccurate and having a tendency to show up in the hands of just about everyone, it's reliable, common as fuck (like 100 for every human in the galaxy common), pretty damned tough, and accurate but that is only by 40k standards. ...So, yeah, I guess it is the AK of the 41st Millennium.

The lasgun has very low recoil, especially in comparison to a [[bolter]] or even an [[autogun]]. More like a jolt than a kick, probably, due to sudden change in air pressure. The powerpack that the weapon uses can fire about a hundred shots before running empty and can be easily recharged through any standard Imperial power supply, direct sunlight, and even heat. A relatively common practice of Imperial Guard units cut off from supplies is to place their lasgun power packs in open fires, although this does lower the pack's lifespan considerably and is [[heresy|frowned upon]].

The weapons are rather more useful in [[Dark Heresy]] than they are in the tabletop wargame, as their reliability, availability and plentiful ammunition become real considerations and they are rather more useful against the human foes that an agent of the Inquisition is likely to face.

Power packs for lasguns also vastly simplify a nightmare waiting to happen for ammunition logistics. Even if Autoguns were better in all ways than a lasgun, the Administratum would still use the lasgun for the power pack. Power packs, while not able to fit all sizes of lasgun apparently, can still be modified to fit, or be recharged in the middle of campaign. Especially important if you can't get any new supplies due to a variety of reasons (Enemy has orbital control, no one has your size caliber, ammunition expires, ect). This is important, since lasguns, the worst they can do if given the wrong size is not work. For an auto gun, with the wide range and variety of possible ammunition sizes, the best that will happen is that you won't fire your weapon, the worse, is that the shooter dies, and more importantly the weapon is destroyed. This is a strategy even being used today, to simplify ammunition supply problems by making all their guns fire the same cartridge. These same standards are impossible to enforce in the Imperium for an army the size of trillions.

One last thing about Lasguns is that they ''can'' be used as last-ditch grenades by basically making the entire power pack empty into the gun without ever actually firing it. It turns the Lasgun into an explosive comparable in power to a krak grenade or melta charge, depending on how badly it manages to fuck up whatever it was thrown at. It can even fuck the shit of a Chaos Dreadnought who thought he was going to make some Guardsmen go squish, and instead gets a lasgun-bomb surprise to the face.

One must wonder, considering how ass-cheap power-packs and the part of the lasgun this power dumps everything into to make it go "boom" are (compared to things like melta bombs and probably krak grenades as well,) why doesn't the Imperium make standard-issue grenades like that? Seriously, imagine guard squads with grenades almost comparable to melta charges ( which are pretty much miniature ''nukes,'') and remember that squads can get multiple assault grenade launchers. The answer is probably that the Techpriests would go completely apeshit for desecrating holy technology and try to secede. Again. Unless there's some threat that forces them to make such weaponry or some red-robed asshat can convince enough other red-robed asshats that it was totally an STC design of course.

Five counter-arguments to the lasgun-power-pack-grenade come readily to mind, discounting most guardsmen not being aware of this particular tactic.
* Firstly, the power pack's detonation timing is highly unpredictable, and as we all know, <del>anything that endangers an imperial infantryman will absolutely not be considered</del> only the most fanatical, stupid, or just plain reckless Guardsmen would be willing to use it regularly.
* Secondly, while a lasgun is pretty inexpensive in comparison to, say, a bolter, its power-packs are ''not'' as cheap to produce (they make up for it by being so easily recharged.) And only veteran soldiers tend to carry more than a small handful of packs; packs which said veterans probably looted off other guardsmen who didn't get to be veterans.
* Thirdly, the blast yield from a power pack is never described as being particularly strong. In the aforementioned example the soldier managed to open a dreadnought's faceplate just enough for the [[grimdark|local flora to kill it]], which sounds commensurate to a glancing hit, estimating the explosion closer to that of a krak grenade (S6) or maybe a little stronger. While still powerful when compared to regular old frag grenades, this is nothing like the famous melta bomb.
* A weapon, no matter how shitty, is still a soldier's baby. A soldier without his main weapon is generally a dead man, commissar or no, and the only time you would be forced to use your own, custom, probably personalized rifle if you live long enough to know this tactic, is in case of true emergency or imminent death. The same case that the first case of this ever being recorded happened.
* Finally, in the instance where a Guardsman survives using his weapon and its magazine in such a reckless manner, he must then face the wrath of his superiors (If he survives the incident); the sheer number of Munitorum violations involved in using a lasgun and its ammo as a makeshift bomb are staggering (and while most alone would probably result in perfectly survivable corporal punishment, such as say being repeatedly rifle-stocked in the balls four dozen times while hanging upside down, all added up it's more pragmatic to just make the punishment execution to save some time.) <del>Unless he manages to secure a new weapon beforehand of course.</del>

In all seriousness, the lasgun is very deadly when used in the hands of someone competent, and as being an effective combat weapon goes, anything not too heavily armored, like Traitor Cultists, Eldar Guardians, Ork Boyz, Tyranid Gaunts, and other Imperial Guard style forces are bound to be ridden with Laser holes. The Vostroyan Firstborn, for example, are renown for their precision with their lasguns and rewarded with high kill counts against everything from Orks to traitors. Elysian Drop Troopers are similarly known for exceptional marksmanship bred via necessity wherein they maximize lethality with minimal shots. And if you pray to the Emperor and get really lucky (given the Guard's numbers, they ''will'' get lucky, a lot), you might be able to take down a Chaos Space Marine (or equivalent) with it anyway - [[What|though Space Marines are also known to die after being poked (stabbed) by enough pointy (sharp hard) sticks on occasion after all or being stomped on by enough human beings at once]] Also, a point- or near-point-blank shot at maximum power from a lasgun can penetrate a Space Marine's helmet and turn his brains into impromptu house paint.

A quote from [[Black Crusade (RPG)]] sums up the las gun perfectly: ''"The Legionnaire that scoffs at a lasgun has not charged across an open field against a hundred of them."''
Of course, in Black Crusade a Legionnaire in power armor is all but impossible to wound with a lasgun.

==Uses for the Lasgun==
*Warming soup
*Cigarette lighter
*Changing TV channels
*Selling to buy a new weapon
*Pissing off [[Thunderhawk]] pilots
*Shining in enemies' eyes
*Throwing at people (may cause more damage than shooting it at them)
*Burning ants
*Paperweight
*Laser sight for a boltgun
*Aide during PotentiaPunctum presentations
*Light shows
*Laser tag for kids (who are probably more dangerous than the gun itself)
*Lighting candles on birthday cakes
*Entertainment for your space-kitties
*Shooting bottles
*Hitting your officer's pipe (Warning, will result in [[Blam|BLAMing]])
*Flashlight

== Other laser weapons ==

The lasgun also comes in carbine, pistol, bullpup, sniper ("long-las"), and light machine gun (the heavy lasgun, which so far seems to only exist in Black Library) varieties, and the Imperium fields many other weapons based on the same technology, such as the [[hellgun]] (a powerful lasgun powered by a backpack power pack), the mighty [[lascannon]] (mighty being relative... SPESS MEHREENS can equip it), the even bigger [[Apocalypse|volcano cannon and turbo-laser]], the even bigger Defense Laser, and the bigger ''still'' laser weapons mounted on [[Battlefleet Gothic|starships.]] Must be a different type, though, because a broadside from a Retribution class battleship can devastate half a continent depending on the [[Skub|calcs]]. A single barrage from an Imperator class Titan can devastate an ''entire'' city with weapons as strong as modern day nukes. Keep in mind how large an Imperial city is.

Oh, and [[C.S. Goto|multilasers]].

=== Hotshot Weapons ===

A variant of the Lasgun, and unrelated to the [[Hellgun]] despite conflicting canon and similar usage, the Hotshot Lasgun and Hotshot Laspistol are weapons used primarily by the [[Stormtrooper]]s (and presumably other arms of the Imperial war machine). These are juiced-up versions of the Lasgun charge pack inside a normal Lasgun. They are designed to be used by elite troops or officers, who are generally better shots. Instead of the Hellgun's tactic of using lots of batteries to shoot several times per second, Hotshots use a super-concentrated laser blast to achieve the same kind of armor-penetrating power.
* On the table top they are S3 / AP3 / 18" Rapid-Fire.

=== Sniper Rifle ===

In the good old days the Imperial sniper rifle was the poorly named 'needle rifle' which was in fact a kind of laser weapon. Well, partly. It had two parts to each shot. It fired a narrow beam laser to burn through armor, and then it fired a 'needle' bullet; a spike of some kind of metal filled with horribly poisonous toxins. With the armor removed first, the spiky bit all but ensured a kill if you hit, spurting deadly death juice into your unfortunate body. Sadly they weren't especially well conceived weapons (hitting the same spot with two different weapons, one that responds to wind and gravity, and the other that doesn't is something of a challenge) so they've pretty much been written out of the setting these days. Now the term "sniper rifle" is used fairly loosely in the Imperium; many sniper rifles are simply over-powered lasguns called long-las rifles, while many others (such as those used by [[Space Marine]] [[Scout]]s) are high-velocity slug-throwers which have more in common with [[autogun]]s than they do with energy weapons. Then there are other more exotic variants firing poisoned darts or even stranger payloads. All of these variants have pretty much the same effect on the target, unless you play older editions or use special characters who have rules that say otherwise. Or play [[Dark Heresy]].

== Property's of a lasgun ==
It's easy to imagine being hit with a lasgun would be like having a hole burned into you like an ant being burned by a magnifying glass. That, of course, is not nearly grimdark enough to be the truth.

A military DEW (or Directed Energy Weapon since military forces love acronyms) comes in several different types, from microwave weapons which are mostly used to short out electronics, to Electrolasers which use lasers to ionize the air into a semi-superconductive channel, allowing an electrical current to be projected between two points like a glorified (albeit high-power) taser. A lasgun however is most likely to be a pulsed energy laser. A pulsed laser works by imparting so much energy to an area so fast, that it turns into plasma and explodes. Modern versions create a pressure wave strong enough to stun and knock a person out (termed "Pulsed Energy Projectile), but they are less then-lethal weapons that don't penetrate things very well by design, while the lasgun is not.

Being hit with a lasgun would look and feel more like you were hit by a concussion grenade held up to your chest. You would see a bright flash of light as your skin or clothing vaporized into plasma, much like a high-end camera flash going next to the wound. Higher-power laser weapons might cause enough of an explosion to blow you back and maybe knock you unconscious, or if you got hit by one of the Lasgun's anti-tank big brothers, vaporize you outright turning you into an impromptu plasma grenade for the rest of your squad to deal with. The explosion would create enough hydrostatic pressure to likely scramble your internal organs and maybe snapping your bones in parts of your body distant from the explosion. However, if the lasgun hit something like armor, or even clothing it would induce an explosion only on the surface of the armor leaving the rest of you safe, though most assuredly stunned and dazzled from the plasma explosion. This explains why the Lasgun has a AP of only -. A Bolter's bolts, on the other hand, penetrate the exterior and then explode inside the target, meaning it can deal with armor and tough alien targets like Orks much easier, since you're effectively ignoring the armor on anything the mass-reactive warhead can punch through. The lasgun is clearly nothing to sneeze at; it's just that the vast majority of the Imperium's enemies are capable of taking that kind of punishment most of the time and still keep on fighting.

While the lasgun is portrayed in some media as having recoil, it doesn't in any true sense of the term. There might be a slight jerk on the barrel from the air pressure differential created by melting a hole through the air, a la a thunderclap, but the effects would be much more pronounced on the target (since there's no direct exchange of kinetic energy, the recoil can be zero, while there is a noticeable impact.) It would, however, make a loud "crack" noise, due to the air it displaces rushing back into the void it created as it fired. It should also be noted that at long range, if you were shot with one, there would be a substantial delay between the shot hitting you and you actually hearing the noise, making it an effective sniper's weapon. The common counterargument to this is that you would be able to follow the beam back to the sniper, but remember: you don't see the beam. It's too bright for you to be able to see it clearly, and you're going to be flashblinded by both the plasma explosion and the laser itself, if it's in a visible spectrum. Which it doesn't have to be. In fact, since Imperial lasgun is described as firing blue or white beams, the laser itself is likely ultraviolet, meaning there would be some brightness as it carved through the air, but not as much as a high-power laser backscattering into your eyes and giving you an impromptu round of Lasik.

Coming to that, [[Grimdark|the continued use of a lasgun is probably going to render you blind.]] Remember, this is a gun that shoots a whole bunch of light to do damage. It's going to be even harder on your retinas, even if you're not the one being hit by it. After all, just because you can't see UV light doesn't mean it's not bouncing around your eyeballs-this is why UV protection in sunglasses is such a big deal, and why your eyes sometimes hurt when you step outside on an overcast day. There's still light there, and it's still fucking with your very easily damaged optics. So unless the Departmento Munitorum issues some kind of protective eyewear or contacts to the Guardsmen (and don't kid yourself, this is 40K. They don't.), their vision is going to get worse and worse over time, until they finally go blind. Fortunately, this would take about six months to a year of exposure of combat level conditions, or one apocalypse battle on a gunline, and most Guardsmen are not going to live that long on the battlefields of the 41st Millennium, and if do live that like then your an elite soldier (or commissar/commander) worth the laser eye surgery to keep fighting since your now worth many times what a normal guardsmen is. Or you manage to buy a cheap pair of shades at your troop ship's market, which are actually pretty common even then.

TL, DR: It's not fun.

Too short, want more? Go [http://www.projectrho.com/public_html/rocket/sidearmenergy.php here].

==See also==
*[[Hellgun]]
*[[Laspistol]]

{{Template:40k-Imperial-Weapons}}
[[category:Warhammer 40,000]]

Imperial Infantryman's Uplifting Primer

2016-07-12T07:58:39Z

2601:285:104:EAC0:B546:455B:1C5F:E921:

[[Image:UpliftingPrimer.jpeg|thumb|right]]

The '''Imperial Infantryman's Uplifting Primer''' is the standard book carried by ALL [[Imperial Guard|Imperial Guardsmen]]. The book, like the steel balls, is standard issue to all recruits. Failure to present it upon request may result in [[Blam|getting shot]]. There is even a page with a small white square on it, and if said square is in any way defiled or marked then the owner would be immediately and thoroughly executed. Good luck trying to actually own a real life copy, it is more expensive than a Leman Russ, just for a used copy. Although, you could get lucky and find ''The Imperial Infantryman's Handbook'' for almost half that price at Barnes and Noble - it includes the Imperial Munitorum Manual as well as the Uplifting Primer in a single book. It also has a nifty little section of pink pages in the back titled ''The Benedictions of the Emperor, Inspiration Source and Uplifting Creeds for all Infantryman''.

This Book basically tells the infantryman that his [[lasgun|weapons]] are the best in the [[41st millennium|universe]] and WILL kill most things with ONE shot (possible but unlikely). It also tells such helpful things like Eldar Shurikens being unable to penetrate Flak armor (total lie and hilarious considering nearly just about any kind of weapon can penetrate flak armor), [[Orks]] being small and stupid (bigger lie, at least at the small part), the [[Tau]] are herbivorous animals that are scared by loud noises and possibly incapable of mathematics and science (wait until the reader sees the sheer amount of loud dakka the Tau posses) or most hilariously, [[Genestealers]] being ''slow, sluggish, and having blunt-tipped claws'' (to which every [[Terminator]] marine in the galaxy either promptly laughed his ass off or suffered an aneurysm from sheer stupidity.)

For an experienced Guard veteran, the only comfort that the primer provides is in cleaning up after a visit to the restroom and MSTing when the commissar isn't around. Seriously, it's canon according to the "15 hours" novel.

''Although it could be argued that is the whole purpose of the primer. Freedom of print is relatively spotty in the God Emperor's realm but all the stuff about how Xenos are puny and weak could be just keep the inevitable civilian reader from crapping himself in fear, since if most people knew the truth about the Imperium's enemies, they'd never join. Few regiments of the IG are without a veteran cadre that would be quick to explain to the FNGs (Frakking New Guys) that Orks are actually quite clever and agile plus larger than humans, Eldar shurikens will reduce you to lunch meat regardless of your flak vest, genestealers will get all up in your grill and rip you apart before you can blink, and that whilst theoretically a Lasgun can kill anything in the galaxy in one shot, it's better to be thorough and [[dakka|shoot it a few dozen more times]]. As such, the primer is there to encourage people to join and boost their morale. In the Imperium's eyes, they only need to last until they get attacked by the enemy. The "weak" get culled and the "strong" survive.''

There's also this one page that has a blank square and the caption "KEEP THIS SPACE CLEAR. DO NOT DEFACE. ON PAIN OF DEATH." Every single book, sans <strike>misprints</strike>[[Blam|forgeries]], has a smudge inside the square.

== Table of Contents ==

# '''Principles and Regulations'''. The rules are very stacked against the lowly trooper. "WRONGS TO SOLDIER, REDRESS OF: Any soldier who thinks himself wronged by an officer and who tries to incite proceedings against them will be punished by a flogging from the officer in question, in front of the rest of the platoon. Officers are to be obeyed at all times, without question or reservation."
# '''Issued Arms, Attire, Apparatus and Equipment'''. The instructions on how to use this stuff is useful.
# '''Imperial Guard Organization, Structure, Basic Battlefield Policy'''. This section is actually quite useful for understanding the logistics
# '''Imperial Guard Armour and Tank Recognition, Affiliated and Enemy Variants'''. It's good to be able to recognize friendly tanks from enemies, but the abilities of enemy vehicles are severely understated.
# '''Know Your Foe'''. This section is where almost all the memetic stuff comes from. See the "severely understated" line above, then multiply by about 27.
# '''Elementary Battlefield Medical Instruction'''. The writer did their research here. There is also a gratuitous section reminding the trooper that any sign of cowardice (in a medical context it's likely referring to PTSD or Shell Shock) is to be reported to a Commissar at once so the usual treatment can be administered. Whether *BLAMMING* or simple notice for the Commissar to pull the soldier out of the line for basic therapy and R&R is up to the reader/Commissar in question.

==Actual Contents of Value==
Despite much of the above (and a lot of what the above lists is ''not'' exaggeration), the Primer actually has a great deal of genuinely useful information in it. Included useful segments include:
* Numerous prayers and hymnals to the [[God-Emperor of Mankind]]
:*Not Included ''The Litany of Stealth''
* Numerous bits of insight on tactics, weapon analysis, and how to keep oneself sane in a given war. Included are segments from the Tactica Imperium, information on how to set frag grenades as booby-traps, how to operate, maintain, and modify lasguns, and numerous bits of information explaining why it's so important that the [[Imperium of Man]] send millions to die all across the Segmentum Solar (tactical importance of the current campaign in terms that the grunts can understand, so they fight with more clarity of purpose)
* Why the Commissar is there to help you and not simply execute your ass to be a dick (mileage may vary)
* Helpful suggestions on how to impress the aforementioned [[Commissar]] with suicidally-brave acts of heroism
* How to procure food and water in a survival situation.
* Why the [[Chaos|ruinous powers]] are bad, how to recognize when someone is under their sway... {{BLAM|FOR OFFICERS EYES ONLY. ARE YOU AN OFFICER? NO!? '''*BLAM!*'''}} and why you should put your faith in the Emprah
* Correct ways to conduct [[Cadian Shock Troops|fieldcraft]] and [[Death Korps of Krieg|trench warfare]]
* The proper use on how to [[Reasonable Marines|take cover and use said cover in a fight]] (*GASP* THEY USE COVER!?)
* Information on [[Sly Marbo|demolition and sabotage]] tactics.
* Why the [[Tau|dreaded space communists]] are bad and eat babies, even though the eating babies is a lie.
* Why the [[Eldar]] are untrustworthy fucks, though the Imperium is no better {{BLAM|HERETICS LIKE YOURSELF ARE NOT WORTHY OF THE TRUTH! '''*BLAM!*'''}}.
* Why leading by example is important (I.E. how to grow the Guardsman standard-issue stainless steel balls. It's a lot like a Chia-pet.)
* Jokes and mocking of the enemy. (The infamous "Litany of Stealth")
* [[Humanity Fuck Yeah|Why humanity is the rightful heir to the universe,]] [[Skub|and thus how purging xenos and heretics is doing the Emperor's work.]]
*[[Grimdark|A death notice to be filled out by the trooper's commander and/or commissar, to speed up informing the next of kin to the trooper's inevitable and almost certainly horrible demise.]]

==Gallery==

<gallery>
Image:IIUPLasgun.jpg|The Primer contains all sorts of information, from the very helpful...
Image:IIUPBayonetting.jpg|...to the parts that are of better use as bog roll. (Except for that last sentence, that's actually a good idea if you ever get there). Not that this is unhelpful mind, just that it's more worthless then a screen door on a submarine against orks.
</gallery>

[[Category:Imperial]]
[[Category:Warhammer 40,000]]

Imperial Infantryman's Uplifting Primer

2016-07-12T07:57:53Z

2601:285:104:EAC0:B546:455B:1C5F:E921:

[[Image:UpliftingPrimer.jpeg|thumb|right]]

The '''Imperial Infantryman's Uplifting Primer''' is the standard book carried by ALL [[Imperial Guard|Imperial Guardsmen]]. The book, like the steel balls, is standard issue to all recruits. Failure to present it upon request may result in [[Blam|getting shot]]. There is even a page with a small white square on it, and if said square is in any way defiled or marked then the owner would be immediately and thoroughly executed. Good luck trying to actually own a real life copy, it is more expensive than a Leman Russ, just for a used copy. Although, you could get lucky and find ''The Imperial Infantryman's Handbook'' for almost half that price at Barnes and Noble - it includes the Imperial Munitorum Manual as well as the Uplifting Primer in a single book. It also has a nifty little section of pink pages in the back titled ''The Benedictions of the Emperor, Inspiration Source and Uplifting Creeds for all Infantryman''.

This Book basically tells the infantryman that his [[lasgun|weapons]] are the best in the [[41st millennium|universe]] and WILL kill most things with ONE shot (possible but unlikely). It also tells such helpful things like Eldar Shurikens being unable to penetrate Flak armor (total lie and hilarious considering nearly just about any kind of weapon can penetrate flak armor), [[Orks]] being small and stupid (bigger lie, at least at the small part), the [[Tau]] are herbivorous animals that are scared by loud noises and possibly incapable of mathematics and science (wait until the reader sees the sheer amount of loud dakka the Tau posses) or most hilariously, [[Genestealers]] being ''slow, sluggish, and having blunt-tipped claws'' (to which every [[Terminator]] marine in the galaxy either promptly laughed his ass off or suffered an aneurysm from sheer stupidity.)

For an experienced Guard veteran, the only comfort that the primer provides is in cleaning up after a visit to the restroom and MSTing when the commissar isn't around. Seriously, it's canon according to the "15 hours" novel.

''Although it could be argued that is the whole purpose of the primer. Freedom of print is relatively spotty in the God Emperor's realm but all the stuff about how Xenos are puny and weak could be just keep the inevitable civilian reader from crapping himself in fear, since if most people knew the truth about the Imperium's enemies, they'd never join. Few regiments of the IG are without a veteran cadre that would be quick to explain to the FNGs (Frakking New Guys) that Orks are actually quite clever and agile plus larger than humans, Eldar shurikens will reduce you to lunch meat regardless of your flak vest, genestealers will get all up in your grill and rip you apart before you can blink, and that whilst theoretically a Lasgun can kill anything in the galaxy in one shot, it's better to be thorough and [[dakka|shoot it a few dozen more times]]. As such, the primer is there to encourage people to join and boost their morale. In the Imperium's eyes, they only need to last until they get attacked by the enemy. The "weak" get culled and the "strong" survive.''

There's also this one page that has a blank square and the caption "KEEP THIS SPACE CLEAR. DO NOT DEFACE. ON PAIN OF DEATH." Every single book, sans <strike>misprints</strike>forgeries, has a smudge inside the square.

== Table of Contents ==

# '''Principles and Regulations'''. The rules are very stacked against the lowly trooper. "WRONGS TO SOLDIER, REDRESS OF: Any soldier who thinks himself wronged by an officer and who tries to incite proceedings against them will be punished by a flogging from the officer in question, in front of the rest of the platoon. Officers are to be obeyed at all times, without question or reservation."
# '''Issued Arms, Attire, Apparatus and Equipment'''. The instructions on how to use this stuff is useful.
# '''Imperial Guard Organization, Structure, Basic Battlefield Policy'''. This section is actually quite useful for understanding the logistics
# '''Imperial Guard Armour and Tank Recognition, Affiliated and Enemy Variants'''. It's good to be able to recognize friendly tanks from enemies, but the abilities of enemy vehicles are severely understated.
# '''Know Your Foe'''. This section is where almost all the memetic stuff comes from. See the "severely understated" line above, then multiply by about 27.
# '''Elementary Battlefield Medical Instruction'''. The writer did their research here. There is also a gratuitous section reminding the trooper that any sign of cowardice (in a medical context it's likely referring to PTSD or Shell Shock) is to be reported to a Commissar at once so the usual treatment can be administered. Whether *BLAMMING* or simple notice for the Commissar to pull the soldier out of the line for basic therapy and R&R is up to the reader/Commissar in question.

==Actual Contents of Value==
Despite much of the above (and a lot of what the above lists is ''not'' exaggeration), the Primer actually has a great deal of genuinely useful information in it. Included useful segments include:
* Numerous prayers and hymnals to the [[God-Emperor of Mankind]]
:*Not Included ''The Litany of Stealth''
* Numerous bits of insight on tactics, weapon analysis, and how to keep oneself sane in a given war. Included are segments from the Tactica Imperium, information on how to set frag grenades as booby-traps, how to operate, maintain, and modify lasguns, and numerous bits of information explaining why it's so important that the [[Imperium of Man]] send millions to die all across the Segmentum Solar (tactical importance of the current campaign in terms that the grunts can understand, so they fight with more clarity of purpose)
* Why the Commissar is there to help you and not simply execute your ass to be a dick (mileage may vary)
* Helpful suggestions on how to impress the aforementioned [[Commissar]] with suicidally-brave acts of heroism
* How to procure food and water in a survival situation.
* Why the [[Chaos|ruinous powers]] are bad, how to recognize when someone is under their sway... {{BLAM|FOR OFFICERS EYES ONLY. ARE YOU AN OFFICER? NO!? '''*BLAM!*'''}} and why you should put your faith in the Emprah
* Correct ways to conduct [[Cadian Shock Troops|fieldcraft]] and [[Death Korps of Krieg|trench warfare]]
* The proper use on how to [[Reasonable Marines|take cover and use said cover in a fight]] (*GASP* THEY USE COVER!?)
* Information on [[Sly Marbo|demolition and sabotage]] tactics.
* Why the [[Tau|dreaded space communists]] are bad and eat babies, even though the eating babies is a lie.
* Why the [[Eldar]] are untrustworthy fucks, though the Imperium is no better {{BLAM|HERETICS LIKE YOURSELF ARE NOT WORTHY OF THE TRUTH! '''*BLAM!*'''}}.
* Why leading by example is important (I.E. how to grow the Guardsman standard-issue stainless steel balls. It's a lot like a Chia-pet.)
* Jokes and mocking of the enemy. (The infamous "Litany of Stealth")
* [[Humanity Fuck Yeah|Why humanity is the rightful heir to the universe,]] [[Skub|and thus how purging xenos and heretics is doing the Emperor's work.]]
*[[Grimdark|A death notice to be filled out by the trooper's commander and/or commissar, to speed up informing the next of kin to the trooper's inevitable and almost certainly horrible demise.]]

==Gallery==

<gallery>
Image:IIUPLasgun.jpg|The Primer contains all sorts of information, from the very helpful...
Image:IIUPBayonetting.jpg|...to the parts that are of better use as bog roll. (Except for that last sentence, that's actually a good idea if you ever get there). Not that this is unhelpful mind, just that it's more worthless then a screen door on a submarine against orks.
</gallery>

[[Category:Imperial]]
[[Category:Warhammer 40,000]]

Imperial Guard Regiment

2016-07-12T07:39:57Z

2601:285:104:EAC0:B546:455B:1C5F:E921: /* Organization */

The '''Regiment''' is the largest semi-permanent unit of organization of the [[Imperial Guard]], consisting of a few hundred to a few hundred thousand Guardsmen and their associated equipment and vehicles.

== Origin ==

[[Space Marine]]s are all well and good, but the implantation of [[gene-seed]] is a risky, prolonged, and expensive process. Even at the peak of the [[Great Crusade]], there were never more than a few million Marines in the entire galaxy. The [[God-Emperor of Mankind|Emperor]] and his growing Imperium needed more soldiers to take and hold planets, and so the Imperial Army was founded to act as an auxiliary force -- while the Space Marines would smash fortresses and other hard targets, the Army would follow behind to hold the line.

To improve force cohesion, they were under the direct authority of the Space Marines with whom they served, but the [[Horus Heresy]] proved how dangerous such an arrangement could be. When [[Horus]] fell, not only did he take his fellow traitor Primarchs and their Legions with him, but also his associated ships and soldiers. Therefore, after the Heresy was put down, the surviving leaders of the Imperium divided the three military branches so that no traitor could strike such a blow at the Imperium ever again.

The forces themselves were separated into smaller pieces, also to reduce the ability of heretics to cause trouble. The [[Legiones Astartes]] were split up into [[Space Marine Chapter|Chapters]], the [[Imperial Navy]] was divided into [[Battlefleet]]s, and the newly-named Imperial Guard was divided into '''regiments'''. Each regiment in theory could only contain a few hundred to a few thousand Guardsmen (but often times there can be regiments of several million Guardsmen although they are very rare and expensive), and was limited to a single specialty (Infantry, Artillery, Armor), so that if even an entire regiment turned traitor, they would not last long -- without the Navy, they could not travel to other planets (or bomb the shit out of them since the navy also got the aircraft), and without the support of other regiments, they would lack most tactical options. The [[Commissar|Commissariat]] was also founded to be an independent watchdog to root out heresy wherever it grew.

== Founding ==

The [[Administratum]] evaluates every planet in the Imperium, analyzing what its resources are and what portion of those resources it owes to the Imperium. For many planets (especially [[Hive World]]s), one such resource is manpower. Worlds are literally [[Imperial Tithe|tithed]] to supply a certain number of a particular kind of regiment. After a regiment is founded, it is shipped off from one battlefield to another according to the designs of the [[Departmento Munitorum]], and may periodically be resupplied with new recruits and equipment by the same, or just left hanging until they are almost totally routed, and then folded into another regiment. Because the information used by the Administratum is often out-of-date (by up to millennia, theoretically), a planet's requirements may be unreasonable, whole regiments can be entirely forgotten or called to battle long after their destruction, and regiments may be deployed to "battlefields" whose wars have long been ended. The fact that designation numbers and equipment often get recycled after the regiment that owns them is destroyed does not help matters. On occasion, a regiment can get a lucky break from bureaucratic inertia (e.g. the Valhallan 597th, of [[Ciaphas Cain]] fame, was formed by the merger of the half-strength 296th and 301st regiments, but is still listed in official records as the 296th and 301st working together, so they get double supplies), but that's not very [[grimdark]] so it only happens very rarely.

== Organization ==

Each planet's Regiments are different with a variety of names for commanders and subordinates, but we'll use the modern day system, in general, there is a commanding officer at the top, with a rank of '''Colonel''' ''(or the equivalent)'', who is assisted by a command staff. The second-in-command may be titled the "executive officer" and often is a '''Major'''.

The Regiment is divided into several companies, the exact number of which depends on the nature of the regiment:
*Each Company is led by a '''Captain''' and a command squad and contains two to six Platoons (because a standard 40K army -- which is about the right size for a company -- has between two and six units of Troops)
**Each Platoon is led by a '''Lieutenant''' and a command squad and has around five, ''(but sometimes more)'' squads of infantry.
***A Squad is led by a '''Sergeant''' who is sometimes assisted by a '''Corporal''' ''(if this is the case, the squad can then be divided into two fireteams)''. Infantry squads nominally contain ten Guardsmen each, though heavy and special weapon squads only have six, and of course numbers can fluctuate as Guardsmen are recruited and killed.

Of course, different types of regiment do things differently but are generally consistent with the levels of authority delegated to their commanders: For example, Armoured Companies still have vehicle squadrons led by Sergeants, but with each further vehicle within the squadron commanded by a Corporal and therefore have a higher proportion on NCOs compared to standard Infantry Regiments, meanwhile while Artillery Companies are less likely to have Corporals at all.

The ''Uplifting Primer'' does include provisions for other ranks not usually found on the tabletop or encountered in the fluff, which might actually be consistent with their in-universe function: '''Lieutenant Colonel''' in real-world militaries command Battalions of multiple Companies which are usually homogenous in structure, ''(A RL regiment is usually multiple Battalions of various compositions, or a single Battalion with added support units)'' but in 40k there is actually little need to deploy separate Battalions, as it would be inefficient for the Navy to transport such small units individually and without external support, so the rank might only find use in specialist or headquarters units, rather than in a typical regimental system.

Further, while the [[Imperial Navy]] uses the rank of '''Warrant Officer''', the Imperial Guard does not appear to have a standard use for it. This is most likely because a naval starship has a much larger number of men under its command than a regiments does (''tens of thousands as opposed to thousands)'' and also the fact that regiments do not often have a fixed headquarters and have a higher turnover of manpower due to casualties, therefore field commissions directly from Sergeant to Lieutenant would be more practical than awaiting a newly commissioned officer to arrive from an academy.

That's not to say that senior Sergeants cannot be found in Staff roles outside of squads, [[Colour Sergeant Jarran Kell|Colour Sergeants]], [[Gunnery Sergeant "Stonetooth" Harker|Gunnery Sergeants]] and [[Sergeant Lukas Bastonne|Staff Sergeants]] are known to exist in-universe but are not mentioned in the ''Primer'', but the factional division of the military into [[Mechanicus|Engineering]], [[Administratum|Adminstration]] or [[Sister Hospitaler|Medical]] roles probably makes such staff appointments less common.

Although the purpose of a RL regimental system is to ensure an unbroken chain-of-command where each trooper who has one Sergeant who himself has one Lieutenant who has one Captain and so on, the 40k universe as with most things tends to be almost mediaeval in its execution: the ''Uplifting Primer'' as well as most fluff on the matter is quite emphatic about when you get issued an order from anyone above you, you comply without question. That attitude may be helpful if you anticipate a high turnover of unit commanders mid-battle ''(this is the Guard, so of course)'' where it becomes impractical to double-check orders with your direct ''(or even intermediate)'' superior, but it would cause nightmares for intelligence and logistics officers trying to keep track of a battlefield when officers subvert the units of their allied commanders, and would probably cause confusion and mixed messages to filter down the chain of command and contribute to even more casualties. ''(this is the Guard, so again, of course)'' The reliability and effectiveness of this system depends on the pre-campaign planning and inter unit training, regiments and their soldiers are told who are their allies, who is in command of their allies, and such stuff, of course this is not always possible, sometimes regiments are newly drawn up and then immediately thrown into a nearby war with only basic training, sometimes they're diverted from one campaign to another, and other times the Munitorum and their allies are just being assholes. Of course, experienced field commanders and strategic officers would encourage policies to make sure they don't end up killing their own allies.

=== Regiment Types ===

To inhibit the spread of [[Chaos]], regiments are usually confined to a single specialization each -- that way, even if an entire regiment falls to Chaos, it will be severely restricted in its tactical options, making it easier for loyalist regiments (who have enough different specializations to complement each other) to put it down. The specializations are:
* '''Armored'''. Armored regiments supply the tanks to a war effort. They may operate as a single force if there is a single, massive target to be destroyed, or if the war is being fought on multiple fronts (e.g. urban warfare), they may be split up to support infantry units or crack vital enemy defense lines.
* '''Artillery'''. Artillery regiments have ALL the big guns. They are deployed whole for massive sieges or defensive actions, often with siege infantry regiments to create defenses and trenches; for a more mobile siege, they may be parceled out into batteries that accompany infantry regiments.
* '''Drop infantry'''. Drop infantry are space paratroopers -- they drop onto enemy weak points for surprise attacks. Unfortunately, this limits the heavy firepower available to them, as artillery pieces and tanks can't be carried by [[Valkyrie]]s. The [[Elysian Drop Troops]] are an example of drop infantry regiments.
* '''Light infantry'''. Light infantry regiments are frequently used for reconnaissance, as they aren't as tied to a supply chain as more mechanized regiments, they are less noisy (again, because of the reduced mechanization and supply chain needs), and frankly, they lack the heavy firepower required to do much else.
* '''Line infantry'''. Line infantry regiments supply the raw manpower that is emblematic of the Imperial Guard.
* '''Mechanized infantry'''. Mechanized infantry regiments are probably the closest thing to an all-rounder combined-arms force that the Imperium has. Mechanized regiments generally give each squad their own [[Chimera]], and often receive detachments of tanks from armored regiments working in the same theater for some extra punch -- or, if there aren't enough Chimeras available to justify keeping them all in one place, they may be split up into "Armoured Fist" squads and given to armored regiments to hold objectives, or infantry regiments who need an armored spearhead. The Valhallan 597th is an example of mechanized infantry regiment.
* '''Siege infantry'''. Siege infantry regiments are similar to line infantry, in that they have lots of men, but they receive extra training in construction of fortifications, trenches, and defense lines, and are usually disciplined and trained to fight and die over the course of months or years for even a few yards of advance. The [[Death Korps of Krieg]] are an example of siege infantry regiments.

The aforementioned restrictions on regiments means that they are not very useful on their own, so there is also a super-regimental command structure used for campaigns.
*Regiments that complement each other in a useful way can be combined into a ''battlegroup'' commanded by a '''General''',
**Several battlegroups on the same front will be overseen by a '''Lord General'''
***...who will in turn answer to the '''Lord General Militant''' of the sector or campaign in question.
****Above these are the '''Lord Commanders''' for each of the five Segmenta of the galaxy,
*****At the very top is the '''Lord Commander Militant''' the leader of the entire [[Imperial Guard]] and one of the [[High Lords of Terra]].

== Tabletop ==

Back in the third edition of [[Warhammer 40,000]], the [[Imperial Guard]] [[Codex]] included a "doctrine" system to represent different types of regiments in the Imperium. Some options would allow certain units to be taken in larger numbers, while others would allow some units to purchase special abilities. The [[Catachan Jungle Fighters]] also received their own mini-dex in Third and Fourth Edition.

The doctrine system was removed in the fifth-edition codex, though some characters can modify the army's abilities a little, and [[Forge World]] has published army lists for the [[Death Korps of Krieg]], [[Elysian Drop Troops]], and a generic "Armoured Battle Group" (tanks to the max) in their [[Imperial Armour]] books.

We have tacticae on the various Imperial Guard army lists that have been published:
* [[Warhammer 40,000/Tactics/Imperial Guard|Imperial Guard]], for light infantry or combined-arms regiments (especially [[Cadian Shock Troops]] and [[Catachan Jungle Fighters]]).
* [[Warhammer 40,000/Tactics/Imperial Guard/Elysian Drop Troops|Elysian Drop Troops]], for drop regiments
* [[Warhammer 40,000/Tactics/Imperial Guard/Death Korps of Krieg|Death Korps of Krieg]], for siege regiments
* [[Warhammer 40,000/Tactics/Imperial Guard/Armoured Battlegroup|Armoured Battlegroup]], for armored regiments or mechanized infantry
* [[Warhammer_40,000/Tactics/Solar_Auxilia_(30k)|Solar Auxilia]], for the elite of the Imperial Army during the Heresy era
* [[Warhammer_40,000/Tactics/Imperial_Militia_and_Cults_(30k)|Imperial Militia and Cults]], for the miscellaneous military units that formed the bulk of the Imperial Army during the Heresy era
== See Also ==

* [[Imperial Guard Regiment Creation Tables]], a set of rolltables for generating a regiment.
* [[Only War]], a roleplaying game made by [[Fantasy Flight Games]], which contains rules for generating and role-playing an IG regiment.

{{Template:40k-Imperial-Regiments}}

Imperial Guard Regiment

2016-07-12T07:33:57Z

2601:285:104:EAC0:B546:455B:1C5F:E921: /* Organization */

The '''Regiment''' is the largest semi-permanent unit of organization of the [[Imperial Guard]], consisting of a few hundred to a few hundred thousand Guardsmen and their associated equipment and vehicles.

== Origin ==

[[Space Marine]]s are all well and good, but the implantation of [[gene-seed]] is a risky, prolonged, and expensive process. Even at the peak of the [[Great Crusade]], there were never more than a few million Marines in the entire galaxy. The [[God-Emperor of Mankind|Emperor]] and his growing Imperium needed more soldiers to take and hold planets, and so the Imperial Army was founded to act as an auxiliary force -- while the Space Marines would smash fortresses and other hard targets, the Army would follow behind to hold the line.

To improve force cohesion, they were under the direct authority of the Space Marines with whom they served, but the [[Horus Heresy]] proved how dangerous such an arrangement could be. When [[Horus]] fell, not only did he take his fellow traitor Primarchs and their Legions with him, but also his associated ships and soldiers. Therefore, after the Heresy was put down, the surviving leaders of the Imperium divided the three military branches so that no traitor could strike such a blow at the Imperium ever again.

The forces themselves were separated into smaller pieces, also to reduce the ability of heretics to cause trouble. The [[Legiones Astartes]] were split up into [[Space Marine Chapter|Chapters]], the [[Imperial Navy]] was divided into [[Battlefleet]]s, and the newly-named Imperial Guard was divided into '''regiments'''. Each regiment in theory could only contain a few hundred to a few thousand Guardsmen (but often times there can be regiments of several million Guardsmen although they are very rare and expensive), and was limited to a single specialty (Infantry, Artillery, Armor), so that if even an entire regiment turned traitor, they would not last long -- without the Navy, they could not travel to other planets (or bomb the shit out of them since the navy also got the aircraft), and without the support of other regiments, they would lack most tactical options. The [[Commissar|Commissariat]] was also founded to be an independent watchdog to root out heresy wherever it grew.

== Founding ==

The [[Administratum]] evaluates every planet in the Imperium, analyzing what its resources are and what portion of those resources it owes to the Imperium. For many planets (especially [[Hive World]]s), one such resource is manpower. Worlds are literally [[Imperial Tithe|tithed]] to supply a certain number of a particular kind of regiment. After a regiment is founded, it is shipped off from one battlefield to another according to the designs of the [[Departmento Munitorum]], and may periodically be resupplied with new recruits and equipment by the same, or just left hanging until they are almost totally routed, and then folded into another regiment. Because the information used by the Administratum is often out-of-date (by up to millennia, theoretically), a planet's requirements may be unreasonable, whole regiments can be entirely forgotten or called to battle long after their destruction, and regiments may be deployed to "battlefields" whose wars have long been ended. The fact that designation numbers and equipment often get recycled after the regiment that owns them is destroyed does not help matters. On occasion, a regiment can get a lucky break from bureaucratic inertia (e.g. the Valhallan 597th, of [[Ciaphas Cain]] fame, was formed by the merger of the half-strength 296th and 301st regiments, but is still listed in official records as the 296th and 301st working together, so they get double supplies), but that's not very [[grimdark]] so it only happens very rarely.

== Organization ==

Each planet's Regiments are different with a variety of names for commanders and subordinates, but we'll use the modern day system, in general, there is a commanding officer at the top, with a rank of '''Colonel''' ''(or the equivalent)'', who is assisted by a command staff. The second-in-command may be titled the "executive officer" and often is a '''Major'''.

The Regiment is divided into several companies, the exact number of which depends on the nature of the regiment:
*Each Company is led by a '''Captain''' and a command squad and contains two to six Platoons (because a standard 40K army -- which is about the right size for a company -- has between two and six units of Troops)
**Each Platoon is led by a '''Lieutenant''' and a command squad and has around five, ''(but sometimes more)'' squads of infantry.
***A Squad is led by a '''Sergeant''' who is sometimes assisted by a '''Corporal''' ''(if this is the case, the squad can then be divided into two fireteams)''. Infantry squads nominally contain ten Guardsmen each, though heavy and special weapon squads only have six, and of course numbers can fluctuate as Guardsmen are recruited and killed.

Of course, different types of regiment do things differently but are generally consistent with the levels of authority delegated to their commanders: For example, Armoured Companies still have vehicle squadrons led by Sergeants, but with each further vehicle within the squadron commanded by a Corporal and therefore have a higher proportion on NCOs compared to standard Infantry Regiments, meanwhile while Artillery Companies are less likely to have Corporals at all.

The ''Uplifting Primer'' does include provisions for other ranks not usually found on the tabletop or encountered in the fluff, which might actually be consistent with their in-universe function: '''Lieutenant Colonel''' in real-world militaries command Battalions of multiple Companies which are usually homogenous in structure, ''(A RL regiment is usually multiple Battalions of various compositions, or a single Battalion with added support units)'' but in 40k there is actually little need to deploy separate Battalions, as it would be inefficient for the Navy to transport such small units individually and without external support, so the rank might only find use in specialist or headquarters units, rather than in a typical regimental system.

Further, while the [[Imperial Navy]] uses the rank of '''Warrant Officer''', the Imperial Guard does not appear to have a standard use for it. This is most likely because a naval starship has a much larger number of men under its command than a regiments does (''tens of thousands as opposed to thousands)'' and also the fact that regiments do not often have a fixed headquarters and have a higher turnover of manpower due to casualties, therefore field commissions directly from Sergeant to Lieutenant would be more practical than awaiting a newly commissioned officer to arrive from an academy.

That's not to say that senior Sergeants cannot be found in Staff roles outside of squads, [[Colour Sergeant Jarran Kell|Colour Sergeants]], [[Gunnery Sergeant "Stonetooth" Harker|Gunnery Sergeants]] and [[Sergeant Lukas Bastonne|Staff Sergeants]] are known to exist in-universe but are not mentioned in the ''Primer'', but the factional division of the military into [[Mechanicus|Engineering]], [[Administratum|Adminstration]] or [[Sister Hospitaler|Medical]] roles probably makes such staff appointments less common.

Although the purpose of a RL regimental system is to ensure an unbroken chain-of-command where each trooper who has one Sergeant who himself has one Lieutenant who has one Captain and so on, the 40k universe as with most things tends to be almost mediaeval in its execution: the ''Uplifting Primer'' as well as most fluff on the matter is quite emphatic about when you get issued an order from anyone above you, you comply without question. That attitude may be helpful if you anticipate a high turnover of unit commanders mid-battle ''(this is the Guard, so of course)'' where it becomes impractical to double-check orders with your direct ''(or even intermediate)'' superior, but it would cause nightmares for intelligence and logistics officers trying to keep track of a battlefield when officers subvert the units of their allied commanders, and would probably cause confusion and mixed messages to filter down the chain of command and contribute to even more casualties. ''(this is the Guard, so again, of course)''

=== Regiment Types ===

To inhibit the spread of [[Chaos]], regiments are usually confined to a single specialization each -- that way, even if an entire regiment falls to Chaos, it will be severely restricted in its tactical options, making it easier for loyalist regiments (who have enough different specializations to complement each other) to put it down. The specializations are:
* '''Armored'''. Armored regiments supply the tanks to a war effort. They may operate as a single force if there is a single, massive target to be destroyed, or if the war is being fought on multiple fronts (e.g. urban warfare), they may be split up to support infantry units or crack vital enemy defense lines.
* '''Artillery'''. Artillery regiments have ALL the big guns. They are deployed whole for massive sieges or defensive actions, often with siege infantry regiments to create defenses and trenches; for a more mobile siege, they may be parceled out into batteries that accompany infantry regiments.
* '''Drop infantry'''. Drop infantry are space paratroopers -- they drop onto enemy weak points for surprise attacks. Unfortunately, this limits the heavy firepower available to them, as artillery pieces and tanks can't be carried by [[Valkyrie]]s. The [[Elysian Drop Troops]] are an example of drop infantry regiments.
* '''Light infantry'''. Light infantry regiments are frequently used for reconnaissance, as they aren't as tied to a supply chain as more mechanized regiments, they are less noisy (again, because of the reduced mechanization and supply chain needs), and frankly, they lack the heavy firepower required to do much else.
* '''Line infantry'''. Line infantry regiments supply the raw manpower that is emblematic of the Imperial Guard.
* '''Mechanized infantry'''. Mechanized infantry regiments are probably the closest thing to an all-rounder combined-arms force that the Imperium has. Mechanized regiments generally give each squad their own [[Chimera]], and often receive detachments of tanks from armored regiments working in the same theater for some extra punch -- or, if there aren't enough Chimeras available to justify keeping them all in one place, they may be split up into "Armoured Fist" squads and given to armored regiments to hold objectives, or infantry regiments who need an armored spearhead. The Valhallan 597th is an example of mechanized infantry regiment.
* '''Siege infantry'''. Siege infantry regiments are similar to line infantry, in that they have lots of men, but they receive extra training in construction of fortifications, trenches, and defense lines, and are usually disciplined and trained to fight and die over the course of months or years for even a few yards of advance. The [[Death Korps of Krieg]] are an example of siege infantry regiments.

The aforementioned restrictions on regiments means that they are not very useful on their own, so there is also a super-regimental command structure used for campaigns.
*Regiments that complement each other in a useful way can be combined into a ''battlegroup'' commanded by a '''General''',
**Several battlegroups on the same front will be overseen by a '''Lord General'''
***...who will in turn answer to the '''Lord General Militant''' of the sector or campaign in question.
****Above these are the '''Lord Commanders''' for each of the five Segmenta of the galaxy,
*****At the very top is the '''Lord Commander Militant''' the leader of the entire [[Imperial Guard]] and one of the [[High Lords of Terra]].

== Tabletop ==

Back in the third edition of [[Warhammer 40,000]], the [[Imperial Guard]] [[Codex]] included a "doctrine" system to represent different types of regiments in the Imperium. Some options would allow certain units to be taken in larger numbers, while others would allow some units to purchase special abilities. The [[Catachan Jungle Fighters]] also received their own mini-dex in Third and Fourth Edition.

The doctrine system was removed in the fifth-edition codex, though some characters can modify the army's abilities a little, and [[Forge World]] has published army lists for the [[Death Korps of Krieg]], [[Elysian Drop Troops]], and a generic "Armoured Battle Group" (tanks to the max) in their [[Imperial Armour]] books.

We have tacticae on the various Imperial Guard army lists that have been published:
* [[Warhammer 40,000/Tactics/Imperial Guard|Imperial Guard]], for light infantry or combined-arms regiments (especially [[Cadian Shock Troops]] and [[Catachan Jungle Fighters]]).
* [[Warhammer 40,000/Tactics/Imperial Guard/Elysian Drop Troops|Elysian Drop Troops]], for drop regiments
* [[Warhammer 40,000/Tactics/Imperial Guard/Death Korps of Krieg|Death Korps of Krieg]], for siege regiments
* [[Warhammer 40,000/Tactics/Imperial Guard/Armoured Battlegroup|Armoured Battlegroup]], for armored regiments or mechanized infantry
* [[Warhammer_40,000/Tactics/Solar_Auxilia_(30k)|Solar Auxilia]], for the elite of the Imperial Army during the Heresy era
* [[Warhammer_40,000/Tactics/Imperial_Militia_and_Cults_(30k)|Imperial Militia and Cults]], for the miscellaneous military units that formed the bulk of the Imperial Army during the Heresy era
== See Also ==

* [[Imperial Guard Regiment Creation Tables]], a set of rolltables for generating a regiment.
* [[Only War]], a roleplaying game made by [[Fantasy Flight Games]], which contains rules for generating and role-playing an IG regiment.

{{Template:40k-Imperial-Regiments}}

Imperial Guard Regiment

2016-07-12T07:29:46Z

2601:285:104:EAC0:B546:455B:1C5F:E921: /* Origin */

The '''Regiment''' is the largest semi-permanent unit of organization of the [[Imperial Guard]], consisting of a few hundred to a few hundred thousand Guardsmen and their associated equipment and vehicles.

== Origin ==

[[Space Marine]]s are all well and good, but the implantation of [[gene-seed]] is a risky, prolonged, and expensive process. Even at the peak of the [[Great Crusade]], there were never more than a few million Marines in the entire galaxy. The [[God-Emperor of Mankind|Emperor]] and his growing Imperium needed more soldiers to take and hold planets, and so the Imperial Army was founded to act as an auxiliary force -- while the Space Marines would smash fortresses and other hard targets, the Army would follow behind to hold the line.

To improve force cohesion, they were under the direct authority of the Space Marines with whom they served, but the [[Horus Heresy]] proved how dangerous such an arrangement could be. When [[Horus]] fell, not only did he take his fellow traitor Primarchs and their Legions with him, but also his associated ships and soldiers. Therefore, after the Heresy was put down, the surviving leaders of the Imperium divided the three military branches so that no traitor could strike such a blow at the Imperium ever again.

The forces themselves were separated into smaller pieces, also to reduce the ability of heretics to cause trouble. The [[Legiones Astartes]] were split up into [[Space Marine Chapter|Chapters]], the [[Imperial Navy]] was divided into [[Battlefleet]]s, and the newly-named Imperial Guard was divided into '''regiments'''. Each regiment in theory could only contain a few hundred to a few thousand Guardsmen (but often times there can be regiments of several million Guardsmen although they are very rare and expensive), and was limited to a single specialty (Infantry, Artillery, Armor), so that if even an entire regiment turned traitor, they would not last long -- without the Navy, they could not travel to other planets (or bomb the shit out of them since the navy also got the aircraft), and without the support of other regiments, they would lack most tactical options. The [[Commissar|Commissariat]] was also founded to be an independent watchdog to root out heresy wherever it grew.

== Founding ==

The [[Administratum]] evaluates every planet in the Imperium, analyzing what its resources are and what portion of those resources it owes to the Imperium. For many planets (especially [[Hive World]]s), one such resource is manpower. Worlds are literally [[Imperial Tithe|tithed]] to supply a certain number of a particular kind of regiment. After a regiment is founded, it is shipped off from one battlefield to another according to the designs of the [[Departmento Munitorum]], and may periodically be resupplied with new recruits and equipment by the same, or just left hanging until they are almost totally routed, and then folded into another regiment. Because the information used by the Administratum is often out-of-date (by up to millennia, theoretically), a planet's requirements may be unreasonable, whole regiments can be entirely forgotten or called to battle long after their destruction, and regiments may be deployed to "battlefields" whose wars have long been ended. The fact that designation numbers and equipment often get recycled after the regiment that owns them is destroyed does not help matters. On occasion, a regiment can get a lucky break from bureaucratic inertia (e.g. the Valhallan 597th, of [[Ciaphas Cain]] fame, was formed by the merger of the half-strength 296th and 301st regiments, but is still listed in official records as the 296th and 301st working together, so they get double supplies), but that's not very [[grimdark]] so it only happens very rarely.

== Organization ==

Each planet's Regiments are different, but in general, there is a commanding officer at the top, with a rank of '''Colonel''' ''(or the equivalent)'', who is assisted by a command staff. The second-in-command may be titled the "executive officer" and often is a '''Major'''.

The Regiment is divided into several companies, the exact number of which depends on the nature of the regiment:
*Each Company is led by a '''Captain''' and a command squad and contains two to six Platoons (because a standard 40K army -- which is about the right size for a company -- has between two and six units of Troops)
**Each Platoon is led by a '''Lieutenant''' and a command squad and has around five, ''(but sometimes more)'' squads of infantry.
***A Squad is led by a '''Sergeant''' who is sometimes assisted by a '''Corporal''' ''(if this is the case, the squad can then be divided into two fireteams)''. Infantry squads nominally contain ten Guardsmen each, though heavy and special weapon squads only have six, and of course numbers can fluctuate as Guardsmen are recruited and killed.

Of course, different types of regiment do things differently but are generally consistent with the levels of authority delegated to their commanders: For example, Armoured Companies still have vehicle squadrons led by Sergeants, but with each further vehicle within the squadron commanded by a Corporal and therefore have a higher proportion on NCOs compared to standard Infantry Regiments, meanwhile while Artillery Companies are less likely to have Corporals at all.

The ''Uplifting Primer'' does include provisions for other ranks not usually found on the tabletop or encountered in the fluff, which might actually be consistent with their in-universe function: '''Lieutenant Colonel''' in real-world militaries command Battalions of multiple Companies which are usually homogenous in structure, ''(A RL regiment is usually multiple Battalions of various compositions, or a single Battalion with added support units)'' but in 40k there is actually little need to deploy separate Battalions, as it would be inefficient for the Navy to transport such small units individually and without external support, so the rank might only find use in specialist or headquarters units, rather than in a typical regimental system.

Further, while the [[Imperial Navy]] uses the rank of '''Warrant Officer''', the Imperial Guard does not appear to have a standard use for it. This is most likely because a naval starship has a much larger number of men under its command than a regiments does (''tens of thousands as opposed to thousands)'' and also the fact that regiments do not often have a fixed headquarters and have a higher turnover of manpower due to casualties, therefore field commissions directly from Sergeant to Lieutenant would be more practical than awaiting a newly commissioned officer to arrive from an academy.

That's not to say that senior Sergeants cannot be found in Staff roles outside of squads, [[Colour Sergeant Jarran Kell|Colour Sergeants]], [[Gunnery Sergeant "Stonetooth" Harker|Gunnery Sergeants]] and [[Sergeant Lukas Bastonne|Staff Sergeants]] are known to exist in-universe but are not mentioned in the ''Primer'', but the factional division of the military into [[Mechanicus|Engineering]], [[Administratum|Adminstration]] or [[Sister Hospitaler|Medical]] roles probably makes such staff appointments less common.

Although the purpose of a RL regimental system is to ensure an unbroken chain-of-command where each trooper who has one Sergeant who himself has one Lieutenant who has one Captain and so on, the 40k universe as with most things tends to be almost mediaeval in its execution: the ''Uplifting Primer'' as well as most fluff on the matter is quite emphatic about when you get issued an order from anyone above you, you comply without question. That attitude may be helpful if you anticipate a high turnover of unit commanders mid-battle ''(this is the Guard, so of course)'' where it becomes impractical to double-check orders with your direct ''(or even intermediate)'' superior, but it would cause nightmares for intelligence and logistics officers trying to keep track of a battlefield when officers subvert the units of their allied commanders, and would probably cause confusion and mixed messages to filter down the chain of command and contribute to even more casualties. ''(this is the Guard, so again, of course)''

=== Regiment Types ===

To inhibit the spread of [[Chaos]], regiments are usually confined to a single specialization each -- that way, even if an entire regiment falls to Chaos, it will be severely restricted in its tactical options, making it easier for loyalist regiments (who have enough different specializations to complement each other) to put it down. The specializations are:
* '''Armored'''. Armored regiments supply the tanks to a war effort. They may operate as a single force if there is a single, massive target to be destroyed, or if the war is being fought on multiple fronts (e.g. urban warfare), they may be split up to support infantry units or crack vital enemy defense lines.
* '''Artillery'''. Artillery regiments have ALL the big guns. They are deployed whole for massive sieges or defensive actions, often with siege infantry regiments to create defenses and trenches; for a more mobile siege, they may be parceled out into batteries that accompany infantry regiments.
* '''Drop infantry'''. Drop infantry are space paratroopers -- they drop onto enemy weak points for surprise attacks. Unfortunately, this limits the heavy firepower available to them, as artillery pieces and tanks can't be carried by [[Valkyrie]]s. The [[Elysian Drop Troops]] are an example of drop infantry regiments.
* '''Light infantry'''. Light infantry regiments are frequently used for reconnaissance, as they aren't as tied to a supply chain as more mechanized regiments, they are less noisy (again, because of the reduced mechanization and supply chain needs), and frankly, they lack the heavy firepower required to do much else.
* '''Line infantry'''. Line infantry regiments supply the raw manpower that is emblematic of the Imperial Guard.
* '''Mechanized infantry'''. Mechanized infantry regiments are probably the closest thing to an all-rounder combined-arms force that the Imperium has. Mechanized regiments generally give each squad their own [[Chimera]], and often receive detachments of tanks from armored regiments working in the same theater for some extra punch -- or, if there aren't enough Chimeras available to justify keeping them all in one place, they may be split up into "Armoured Fist" squads and given to armored regiments to hold objectives, or infantry regiments who need an armored spearhead. The Valhallan 597th is an example of mechanized infantry regiment.
* '''Siege infantry'''. Siege infantry regiments are similar to line infantry, in that they have lots of men, but they receive extra training in construction of fortifications, trenches, and defense lines, and are usually disciplined and trained to fight and die over the course of months or years for even a few yards of advance. The [[Death Korps of Krieg]] are an example of siege infantry regiments.

The aforementioned restrictions on regiments means that they are not very useful on their own, so there is also a super-regimental command structure used for campaigns.
*Regiments that complement each other in a useful way can be combined into a ''battlegroup'' commanded by a '''General''',
**Several battlegroups on the same front will be overseen by a '''Lord General'''
***...who will in turn answer to the '''Lord General Militant''' of the sector or campaign in question.
****Above these are the '''Lord Commanders''' for each of the five Segmenta of the galaxy,
*****At the very top is the '''Lord Commander Militant''' the leader of the entire [[Imperial Guard]] and one of the [[High Lords of Terra]].

== Tabletop ==

Back in the third edition of [[Warhammer 40,000]], the [[Imperial Guard]] [[Codex]] included a "doctrine" system to represent different types of regiments in the Imperium. Some options would allow certain units to be taken in larger numbers, while others would allow some units to purchase special abilities. The [[Catachan Jungle Fighters]] also received their own mini-dex in Third and Fourth Edition.

The doctrine system was removed in the fifth-edition codex, though some characters can modify the army's abilities a little, and [[Forge World]] has published army lists for the [[Death Korps of Krieg]], [[Elysian Drop Troops]], and a generic "Armoured Battle Group" (tanks to the max) in their [[Imperial Armour]] books.

We have tacticae on the various Imperial Guard army lists that have been published:
* [[Warhammer 40,000/Tactics/Imperial Guard|Imperial Guard]], for light infantry or combined-arms regiments (especially [[Cadian Shock Troops]] and [[Catachan Jungle Fighters]]).
* [[Warhammer 40,000/Tactics/Imperial Guard/Elysian Drop Troops|Elysian Drop Troops]], for drop regiments
* [[Warhammer 40,000/Tactics/Imperial Guard/Death Korps of Krieg|Death Korps of Krieg]], for siege regiments
* [[Warhammer 40,000/Tactics/Imperial Guard/Armoured Battlegroup|Armoured Battlegroup]], for armored regiments or mechanized infantry
* [[Warhammer_40,000/Tactics/Solar_Auxilia_(30k)|Solar Auxilia]], for the elite of the Imperial Army during the Heresy era
* [[Warhammer_40,000/Tactics/Imperial_Militia_and_Cults_(30k)|Imperial Militia and Cults]], for the miscellaneous military units that formed the bulk of the Imperial Army during the Heresy era
== See Also ==

* [[Imperial Guard Regiment Creation Tables]], a set of rolltables for generating a regiment.
* [[Only War]], a roleplaying game made by [[Fantasy Flight Games]], which contains rules for generating and role-playing an IG regiment.

{{Template:40k-Imperial-Regiments}}

Imperial Guard Regiment

2016-07-12T07:27:31Z

2601:285:104:EAC0:B546:455B:1C5F:E921:

The '''Regiment''' is the largest semi-permanent unit of organization of the [[Imperial Guard]], consisting of a few hundred to a few hundred thousand Guardsmen and their associated equipment and vehicles.

== Origin ==

[[Space Marine]]s are all well and good, but the implantation of [[gene-seed]] is a risky, prolonged, and expensive process. Even at the peak of the [[Great Crusade]], there were never more than a few million Marines in the entire galaxy. The [[God-Emperor of Mankind|Emperor]] and his growing Imperium needed more soldiers to take and hold planets, and so the Imperial Army was founded to act as an auxiliary force -- while the Space Marines would smash fortresses and other hard targets, the Army would follow behind to hold the line.

To improve force cohesion, they were under the direct authority of the Space Marines with whom they served, but the [[Horus Heresy]] proved how dangerous such an arrangement could be. When [[Horus]] fell, not only did he take his fellow traitor Primarchs and their Legions with him, but also his associated ships and soldiers. Therefore, after the Heresy was put down, the surviving leaders of the Imperium divided the three military branches so that no traitor could strike such a blow at the Imperium ever again.

The forces themselves were separated into smaller pieces, also to reduce the ability of heretics to cause trouble. The [[Legiones Astartes]] were split up into [[Space Marine Chapter|Chapters]], the [[Imperial Navy]] was divided into [[Battlefleet]]s, and the newly-named Imperial Guard was divided into '''regiments'''. Each regiment could only contain a few hundred to a few thousand Guardsmen, and was limited to a single specialty, so that if even an entire regiment turned traitor, they would not last long -- without the Navy, they could not travel to other planets (or bomb the shit out of them since the navy also got the aircraft), and without the support of other regiments, they would lack most tactical options. The [[Commissar|Commissariat]] was also founded to be an independent watchdog to root out heresy wherever it grew.

== Founding ==

The [[Administratum]] evaluates every planet in the Imperium, analyzing what its resources are and what portion of those resources it owes to the Imperium. For many planets (especially [[Hive World]]s), one such resource is manpower. Worlds are literally [[Imperial Tithe|tithed]] to supply a certain number of a particular kind of regiment. After a regiment is founded, it is shipped off from one battlefield to another according to the designs of the [[Departmento Munitorum]], and may periodically be resupplied with new recruits and equipment by the same, or just left hanging until they are almost totally routed, and then folded into another regiment. Because the information used by the Administratum is often out-of-date (by up to millennia, theoretically), a planet's requirements may be unreasonable, whole regiments can be entirely forgotten or called to battle long after their destruction, and regiments may be deployed to "battlefields" whose wars have long been ended. The fact that designation numbers and equipment often get recycled after the regiment that owns them is destroyed does not help matters. On occasion, a regiment can get a lucky break from bureaucratic inertia (e.g. the Valhallan 597th, of [[Ciaphas Cain]] fame, was formed by the merger of the half-strength 296th and 301st regiments, but is still listed in official records as the 296th and 301st working together, so they get double supplies), but that's not very [[grimdark]] so it only happens very rarely.

== Organization ==

Each planet's Regiments are different, but in general, there is a commanding officer at the top, with a rank of '''Colonel''' ''(or the equivalent)'', who is assisted by a command staff. The second-in-command may be titled the "executive officer" and often is a '''Major'''.

The Regiment is divided into several companies, the exact number of which depends on the nature of the regiment:
*Each Company is led by a '''Captain''' and a command squad and contains two to six Platoons (because a standard 40K army -- which is about the right size for a company -- has between two and six units of Troops)
**Each Platoon is led by a '''Lieutenant''' and a command squad and has around five, ''(but sometimes more)'' squads of infantry.
***A Squad is led by a '''Sergeant''' who is sometimes assisted by a '''Corporal''' ''(if this is the case, the squad can then be divided into two fireteams)''. Infantry squads nominally contain ten Guardsmen each, though heavy and special weapon squads only have six, and of course numbers can fluctuate as Guardsmen are recruited and killed.

Of course, different types of regiment do things differently but are generally consistent with the levels of authority delegated to their commanders: For example, Armoured Companies still have vehicle squadrons led by Sergeants, but with each further vehicle within the squadron commanded by a Corporal and therefore have a higher proportion on NCOs compared to standard Infantry Regiments, meanwhile while Artillery Companies are less likely to have Corporals at all.

The ''Uplifting Primer'' does include provisions for other ranks not usually found on the tabletop or encountered in the fluff, which might actually be consistent with their in-universe function: '''Lieutenant Colonel''' in real-world militaries command Battalions of multiple Companies which are usually homogenous in structure, ''(A RL regiment is usually multiple Battalions of various compositions, or a single Battalion with added support units)'' but in 40k there is actually little need to deploy separate Battalions, as it would be inefficient for the Navy to transport such small units individually and without external support, so the rank might only find use in specialist or headquarters units, rather than in a typical regimental system.

Further, while the [[Imperial Navy]] uses the rank of '''Warrant Officer''', the Imperial Guard does not appear to have a standard use for it. This is most likely because a naval starship has a much larger number of men under its command than a regiments does (''tens of thousands as opposed to thousands)'' and also the fact that regiments do not often have a fixed headquarters and have a higher turnover of manpower due to casualties, therefore field commissions directly from Sergeant to Lieutenant would be more practical than awaiting a newly commissioned officer to arrive from an academy.

That's not to say that senior Sergeants cannot be found in Staff roles outside of squads, [[Colour Sergeant Jarran Kell|Colour Sergeants]], [[Gunnery Sergeant "Stonetooth" Harker|Gunnery Sergeants]] and [[Sergeant Lukas Bastonne|Staff Sergeants]] are known to exist in-universe but are not mentioned in the ''Primer'', but the factional division of the military into [[Mechanicus|Engineering]], [[Administratum|Adminstration]] or [[Sister Hospitaler|Medical]] roles probably makes such staff appointments less common.

Although the purpose of a RL regimental system is to ensure an unbroken chain-of-command where each trooper who has one Sergeant who himself has one Lieutenant who has one Captain and so on, the 40k universe as with most things tends to be almost mediaeval in its execution: the ''Uplifting Primer'' as well as most fluff on the matter is quite emphatic about when you get issued an order from anyone above you, you comply without question. That attitude may be helpful if you anticipate a high turnover of unit commanders mid-battle ''(this is the Guard, so of course)'' where it becomes impractical to double-check orders with your direct ''(or even intermediate)'' superior, but it would cause nightmares for intelligence and logistics officers trying to keep track of a battlefield when officers subvert the units of their allied commanders, and would probably cause confusion and mixed messages to filter down the chain of command and contribute to even more casualties. ''(this is the Guard, so again, of course)''

=== Regiment Types ===

To inhibit the spread of [[Chaos]], regiments are usually confined to a single specialization each -- that way, even if an entire regiment falls to Chaos, it will be severely restricted in its tactical options, making it easier for loyalist regiments (who have enough different specializations to complement each other) to put it down. The specializations are:
* '''Armored'''. Armored regiments supply the tanks to a war effort. They may operate as a single force if there is a single, massive target to be destroyed, or if the war is being fought on multiple fronts (e.g. urban warfare), they may be split up to support infantry units or crack vital enemy defense lines.
* '''Artillery'''. Artillery regiments have ALL the big guns. They are deployed whole for massive sieges or defensive actions, often with siege infantry regiments to create defenses and trenches; for a more mobile siege, they may be parceled out into batteries that accompany infantry regiments.
* '''Drop infantry'''. Drop infantry are space paratroopers -- they drop onto enemy weak points for surprise attacks. Unfortunately, this limits the heavy firepower available to them, as artillery pieces and tanks can't be carried by [[Valkyrie]]s. The [[Elysian Drop Troops]] are an example of drop infantry regiments.
* '''Light infantry'''. Light infantry regiments are frequently used for reconnaissance, as they aren't as tied to a supply chain as more mechanized regiments, they are less noisy (again, because of the reduced mechanization and supply chain needs), and frankly, they lack the heavy firepower required to do much else.
* '''Line infantry'''. Line infantry regiments supply the raw manpower that is emblematic of the Imperial Guard.
* '''Mechanized infantry'''. Mechanized infantry regiments are probably the closest thing to an all-rounder combined-arms force that the Imperium has. Mechanized regiments generally give each squad their own [[Chimera]], and often receive detachments of tanks from armored regiments working in the same theater for some extra punch -- or, if there aren't enough Chimeras available to justify keeping them all in one place, they may be split up into "Armoured Fist" squads and given to armored regiments to hold objectives, or infantry regiments who need an armored spearhead. The Valhallan 597th is an example of mechanized infantry regiment.
* '''Siege infantry'''. Siege infantry regiments are similar to line infantry, in that they have lots of men, but they receive extra training in construction of fortifications, trenches, and defense lines, and are usually disciplined and trained to fight and die over the course of months or years for even a few yards of advance. The [[Death Korps of Krieg]] are an example of siege infantry regiments.

The aforementioned restrictions on regiments means that they are not very useful on their own, so there is also a super-regimental command structure used for campaigns.
*Regiments that complement each other in a useful way can be combined into a ''battlegroup'' commanded by a '''General''',
**Several battlegroups on the same front will be overseen by a '''Lord General'''
***...who will in turn answer to the '''Lord General Militant''' of the sector or campaign in question.
****Above these are the '''Lord Commanders''' for each of the five Segmenta of the galaxy,
*****At the very top is the '''Lord Commander Militant''' the leader of the entire [[Imperial Guard]] and one of the [[High Lords of Terra]].

== Tabletop ==

Back in the third edition of [[Warhammer 40,000]], the [[Imperial Guard]] [[Codex]] included a "doctrine" system to represent different types of regiments in the Imperium. Some options would allow certain units to be taken in larger numbers, while others would allow some units to purchase special abilities. The [[Catachan Jungle Fighters]] also received their own mini-dex in Third and Fourth Edition.

The doctrine system was removed in the fifth-edition codex, though some characters can modify the army's abilities a little, and [[Forge World]] has published army lists for the [[Death Korps of Krieg]], [[Elysian Drop Troops]], and a generic "Armoured Battle Group" (tanks to the max) in their [[Imperial Armour]] books.

We have tacticae on the various Imperial Guard army lists that have been published:
* [[Warhammer 40,000/Tactics/Imperial Guard|Imperial Guard]], for light infantry or combined-arms regiments (especially [[Cadian Shock Troops]] and [[Catachan Jungle Fighters]]).
* [[Warhammer 40,000/Tactics/Imperial Guard/Elysian Drop Troops|Elysian Drop Troops]], for drop regiments
* [[Warhammer 40,000/Tactics/Imperial Guard/Death Korps of Krieg|Death Korps of Krieg]], for siege regiments
* [[Warhammer 40,000/Tactics/Imperial Guard/Armoured Battlegroup|Armoured Battlegroup]], for armored regiments or mechanized infantry
* [[Warhammer_40,000/Tactics/Solar_Auxilia_(30k)|Solar Auxilia]], for the elite of the Imperial Army during the Heresy era
* [[Warhammer_40,000/Tactics/Imperial_Militia_and_Cults_(30k)|Imperial Militia and Cults]], for the miscellaneous military units that formed the bulk of the Imperial Army during the Heresy era
== See Also ==

* [[Imperial Guard Regiment Creation Tables]], a set of rolltables for generating a regiment.
* [[Only War]], a roleplaying game made by [[Fantasy Flight Games]], which contains rules for generating and role-playing an IG regiment.

{{Template:40k-Imperial-Regiments}}

Imperial Guard

2016-06-30T22:17:59Z

2601:285:104:EAC0:B546:455B:1C5F:E921: /* Overview */

{{Awesome}}
[[File:Macharius Charge.png|400px|thumb|right|His name struck fear into hearts of foul xenos.]]
''"Battle is the most magnificent competition in which a human being can indulge. It brings out all that is best; it removes all that is base. All men are afraid in battle. The coward is the one who lets his fear overcome his sense of duty. Duty is the essence of manhood."''

''"Wars may be fought with weapons, but they are won by men."''

- George S. Patton

''"Quantity has a quality all of its own"'' - Joseph Stalin

''"To each of us falls a task, and all the [[Emperor]] requires of us Guardsmen is that we stand the line, and we die fighting. It is what we do ''best'' - we die standing."'' - [[General Sturnn]] of the Imperial Guard

The '''Imperial Guard''' (officially titled the '''Astra Militarum''' as of [[Warhammer 40,000 6th Edition|6th edition]], cause fuck your original name if GW can't trademark it), are the foot soldiers of the [[Imperium]] in [[Warhammer 40,000]]. They only exist to die gloriously in the [[Empra]]'s name. [[Commissar]]s (like [[Holt]] and [[Ciaphas Cain]]) ensure they do so by executing any cowards or deserters. During the [[Great Crusade]], the Emperor only intended for them to be [[Solar Auxilia|auxilia]] for his [[Space Marines|SPESS MEHRINES]], since the average Guardsman is only capable of drawing enemy fire and shining a [[Lasgun|flashlight]] at his enemies (much more fortunate Guardsmen get to drive the tanks and other armored vehicles fielded by the IG, which proceed to blow their enemies into little chunks from a very long way away); but after [[Horus Heresy|Horus' little tantrum]] and the [[Second Founding|breakup of the Legions]], trillions upon trillions of humans were drafted to make up for the difference, even if they're generally not [[Grimdark|expected to survive their first combat action]]. Even so, many consider that it's because of their dogged perseverance in the face of overwhelming odds that makes them so [[awesome]].

==Overview==
It is worth noting that in a universe where the majority of the other armies are either:
* [[Necron|Ancient Murdering Robots that destroy the laws of physics with their tech and don't die even if they are nuked]]
* [[Space Marines|Genetically engineered killing machines]]
* [[Chaos Space Marines|The evil twin brother of the Genetically engineered killing machines]], with equally evil goatees
* Clad in [[pauldrons|powered armor]]
* [[Ork|Extremely warlike genetically-engineered fungus able to grow bigger and stronger the more they fight.]]
* [[Eldar|Manipulative space elves]] in possession of extremely cheesy technology and can jump around making damn accurate shots like Quake players
* The above-mentioned space elves' [[Dark Eldar|emo, bondage obsessed cousins]] who like to meet interesting people, shoot them a little, then torture them for eternity
* Highly-advanced [[Tau|space Communists]] with mecha and god-like firepower that surprisingly uses Combined Arms Warfare more than Imperial Guard
* [[Tyranid|Mutant 10ft tall space monsters with lots of teeth to devour you with]]
* [[Tyranid|Come in such a huge swarms that you literally run out of ammo before your guns can chew through half of them]]
* [[Daemon]]s with a billion tentacles to rape you with
* [[Rak'gol|Reptilian/Insectoid abominations that kill you and mutilate your body because they think its "Funny"]]
* Some combination of the above

[[File:Trance.jpg|300px|right|thumb|"Welcome to the jungle, we've got fun and games!"]]
The foot soldiers of the Imperial Guard take to the field equipped with nothing more than the 40k equivalent of flak jackets, glorified laser pointers, a copy of the [[Imperial Infantryman's Uplifting Primer]] (<strike>if they have not already used it for toilet paper</strike>.{{BLAM}} Note: it is highly recommended that you do not use it as toilet paper, to prevent BLAMing) and a pair of Mars pattern-forged titanium-plated balls. Please note that whilst the Lasgun and Flak armor (in essence it's an oversized SAPI plate) are very good by modern standards, they're just flashlights and t-shirts compared to the automatic mini-rocket launchers and power armor everyone else uses. This means they have balls of steel (as in Duke Nukem would say, "Holy shit! I thought I had balls of steel!").

Examples of Guardsmen going above and beyond this, demonstrating the possession of testicles so massive they should be deployed in battle as a separate unit, are plentiful; [[Ollanius Pius]] is one such Guardsman, standing up to fucking [[Horus]] himself (which unfortunately has been retconned. Several times.); the original [[Dawn of War]] features the Blood Ravens running into a pair of Guardsmen who have held their position, without support, in the middle of a combined Chaos/Ork/Eldar invasion, for more than a week; [[Dawn of War II]] has Guardsmen rescued in an earlier mission returning in the finale to provide infantry support while the Blood Ravens launch an attack on a fucking [[Tyranid]] hive. These same guardsmen (led by the ever awesome [[Merrick|Sergeant Merrick]]) SURVIVE the suicidal mission and fight on for TEN MORE YEARS against the remnants of the Tyranids/Orks/Eldar, and a group totaling up to 72 still loyal IG in six separate blob-groups on frozen over Aurelia during those same ten years manage to hold out against their late fellows now in Papa Nurgle's arms who are supported by the remnants of the Black Legion in the area, while just outside the new temple to Nurgle.

Although the average front line Guardsman is highly unlikely to survive his first deployment, veteran soldiers are considered to be some of the manliest motherfuckers the Imperium has to offer, putting even the fucking SPESS MEHRENS to a billion shames. One disturbing thing is that if the tactics of the Imperial Guard were improved from WWI style warfare (overuse of artillery and mass charges against machine guns and tanks) and updated to modern style warfare (such as taking cover and using air/armor/support, which many elite regiments often are, theres so much damn variety you can't really have good quality control.) the Imperial Guard ''could'' become the most feared army in the Universe but '''NO''' that's not [[grimdark]] enough! And that's the Tau's tactic. Although, do note that some commanders themselves shove off this fact and do order their men to charge the enemy lines, with or without heavy armor/artillery support and regardless of terrain.

Dan Abnett's work and their latest edition turned them into Gods of Mechanized War and yet, they still suck compared to 8 feet tall Daemonic killing machines with chainaxes. To be fair, though, that's much like comparing a sedan to a tank. I mean, how are you NOT supposed to suck against things that will slice through meter thick steel armor like so much cheese?

It may sound harsh, but the cold, hard truth of the matter is that the lowest currency in the Imperium is human life. For example, in the modern day a commander would be expected to sacrifice expensive equipment (a cruise missile ain't cheap) to save even a single life, because in the grim darkness of the far future, public outreach, civilian morale and "leave no man behind" kind of ideals tend to screw up a already overtaxed bureaucratically fucked Munitorium commanders justifiably believe it isn't worth the trouble . Instead, commanders do risk assessment. They're not going to devote resources just to save one lowly grunt if they're gonna lose a resource more expensive than what they're getting. Although to be fair, commanders who make these decisions know the moral implications of what they're doing while the Imperium treats this as a perfectly normal act.

[[File:Lord Solar Macharius.jpg|250px|left|thumb|"The meaning of victory is not to defeat your enemy but to destroy him, to eradicate him from living memory, to leave no remnant of his endeavors, to crush utterly his every achievement and remove from all record his every trace of existence. From that defeat no enemy can ever recover. That is the meaning of victory."]]

A bit of maths, if you will. There are 32,380 Hive Worlds in the Imperium. The average population of these worlds is around 200 billion each. We put these together and we get 6.476E15 (6,476,000,000,000,000 or 6.476 Quadrillion) people on Hive worlds ALONE. Eventually there would be more human retard-babies that there would be soylens viridiens and lasguns to come out of the Forge World assembly lines.

So now you see why humans are worth so little. But this also means that once they get their ass in gear and onto the battlefield, they ALWAYS win, because they have all but unlimited manpower and resources. Compare it to water bashing against rocks. Sure, a few gallons won't do jack, but countless billions of tonnes crashing down on it WILL destroy it in a surprisingly short amount of time. Apply actual tactics, as every regiment that isn't Kriegan does, and it becomes [[rape|even more effective]] (Do keep in mind, it's not like they commit quintillions of troops to one battle. The Imperium frequently has to withdraw, but it's like saying "We lost the battle, BUT NOT THE WAR!").

In fact, it is point-blank stated numerous times that guardsmen are way cheaper than their lasguns. Because, you know, there are far more Hive Worlds to ''produce'' humans than there are Forge Worlds to produce lasguns. And to add more grimdark, Imperium lost a lot of forge worlds and mining worlds during the [[Time of Ending]], so there are even fewer lasguns and cardboard jackets coming from assembly lines. The [[Death Korps of Krieg]] have a specific guy who runs around battlefields shooting the wounded and collecting their gear (as well as blood and organs to fix those who still can be saved to fight next day).

Think of the Red Army at the [[wikipedia:Battle of Stalingrad|Battle of Stalingrad]]: Soviet Russia had a fuckton of soldiers to draw from, but many were not issued spare ammunition or even rifles, and were expected to loot supplies off dead bodies. On an individual level the Germans had the obvious advantage, but send in enough cannon fodder to keep them pinned inside they city, then cut them off, and they eventually cracked.

But what the Imperium does have going for itself is the individual heroism of its protectors. The Guard holds countless heroes, without whom the Imperium would have fallen ages ago. Notable heroes of the Imperial Guard include: [[Ollanius Pius]], [[Straken]], [[Creed]], [[Lord Solar Macharius]], [[Ciaphas Cain|Ciaphas Cain HERO OF THE IMPERIUM]], [[Vance Motherfucking Stubbs]], [[Yarrick]], and countless others. These unique men and women inspire the masses around them to truly heroic deeds, and through those deeds, ensure that the Imperium will never falter.

==Play Style==
[[File:Glory.jpg|300px|right|thumb|Men of the Brimlock Eleventh, fighting on Voor against Orks.]]

''"You see, the [[Necron|Killbots]] have a preset kill limit. Knowing their weakness, I sent wave after wave of my own men at them, until they reached their limit and shut down."'' - Zapp Brannigan, Twenty-five Star General of the Imperial Guard.

The Imperial Guard are notorious for their SIGAOD methodology: Shooty Imperial Guard Army Of Doom for the less than nerdy. The basic lasguns are downright pathetic, but can [[Dakka|still be effective if used en masse]], and we mean ''en masse''. The effect is a little like how cavemen throwing rocks could still be a threat to fully armored knights. It only takes one lucky shot and they don't stop shooting until they get lucky.

The IG has loads of vehicles. ''Loads'' of vehicles. They can take a whole squadron as a single Fast Attack or Heavy Support slot, and most are fairly cheap and most pretty good for what you pay for. There are three principle IG vehicles of note:
* First is the [[Chimera]], which is basically a troop transport with a turret. Its armor is aluminum and it is not particularly fast, but it's cheap and the passengers can still shoot while inside. At least it's more useful than the Rhino.
* The second is the iconic [[Leman Russ Battle Tank]]. It is in every way a solid, dependable, warhorse. Everything from the optional heavy sponsons, to the BFG on the turret, to the completely exposed engine in the rear. Apparently, they ran out of badass when they designed it.
* The last vehicle of note is the [[Basilisk Artillery Gun|Basilisk]]. Apparently, some tech-priest decided to take a Chimera, rip off the turret and troop compartment and replace it with the biggest piece of artillery he could find. Unfortunately, there weren't any Titan legions nearby so he settled for the Earthshaker cannon. The Earthshaker is far more powerful than even the BFG they stuck on the Leman Russ and has ten times the range. No WH40k game has been played where a target has been out of range of the Basilisk.

The three vehicles above are only a small selection of what the Guard has to offer, but they provide pretty reliable workhorses of most builds and strategies. Most other vehicles are specialized variants of the above, being largely situational units.

Let's not forget the Deathstrike Missile, which GW decided to give UNLIMITED RANGE. Players have called up GW stores the next town over and told them that I'm dropping a Deathstrike in the middle of whatever battle is closest, and they've accepted.

Also of note is 6th Edition's contribution of flyer units. The IG has the most non-apocalypse flyer units in 40k, and while some of them are absolutely useless for anything but flavor, some of them kick all kinds of ass. Triple twin-linked Lascannon, twin-linked Punisher Gatling cannons, or a flying tank-busting mega-bolter kinds of ass to be specific. Raep from above.

In summary, the Imperial Guard wins by having firepower, cannon fodder, and lots of both, transported in a massive variety of [[METAL BOXES]].

Unfortunately for the Guard, though, the Imperial Navy has a bad habit of taking ships that were designed to launch atmospheric craft in support of the Guard (such as Marauders) and instead sticks void combat attack craft inside (such as Furies). The result of this is painfully obvious if you're a Guardsman on the ground. Not to say they don't have air support, but that their air support has a presence that is completely at odds with the number of atmospheric fighters and bombers a ship can carry. The Navy literally fits whatever atmospheric fighters and bombers they can into whatever excess space remains after putting their Furies and Starhawks into hangers designed for holding countless Lightnings, Thunderbolts, Marauders, and Avengers, instead. Grimdark? No, just [[Derp|uncooperative morons]]. Enter the Hydra. The only tank designed to take out aircraft. That is BADASS. Screw the navy. Hell, some regiments have a Leman Russ for every infantry squad! Do that with Thunderbolts or Lightnings in addition to the Russ and...yeah, epic-stomp.

==Notable Figures of the Imperial Guard==
[[File:Stormtrooper vs Ork.jpg|250px|right|thumb|Who's "ded 'ard" NOW, you fat, grammatically challenged cucumber?!]]
*[[Ciaphas Cain]] - '''HERO OF THE IMPERIUM''' (Charming Commissar in the Harry Flashman/Edmund Blackadder tradition.)
*[[Colonel-Commissar Ibram Gaunt]] - (Rambo + Sharpe + 40,000 kg of awesome) Main protagonist of Gaunt's Ghosts, and a REAL hero of the Imperium, [[grimdark|unjustly doomed to lowly obscurity]].
*[[Commissar Yarrick]] - Old one-eye. Saviour of Armageddon, twice. Known for having an Ork Klaw on his arm, having a personal Baneblade, and a [[gay|bizarre]] relationship with the ork warlord [[Ghazghkull Mag Uruk Thraka]].
*[[Holt|Commissar Holt]] - Awesome cinematics are awesome, from Warhammer 40,000: Final Liberation.
*[[Commissar Dan]] - "But Commissar Dan says we're on a blaze for glory run!" "Commissar Dan is a ''maniac''! Never listen to anything he says." Also canon thanks to FFG.
*[[Commissar Fuklaw]] - Currently in service with the [[Angry Marines]].
*[[Commissar Raege]] - Currently trolling faggoty [[Space Marines]].
*[[General Sturnn]] - Manly damn old son of a bitch, from [[Dawn of War#Winter Assault|Dawn of War: Winter Assault]]. Struggles with grammar because of the grit in his teeth.
*[[Castor|Lord General Castor]] - Sporting a manly mustache and known for having a trophy room full of Tyranid heads.
*[[Ollanius Pius]] - The catalyst for the [[God-Emperor of Mankind|Emperor]] finally ''erasing'' [[Horus]] out of existence. (No longer canon, which is BULLSHIT! Though he DOES still exist as a Saint of the IG. No worries, /tg/ is keeping his story alive.)
*[[Vance Motherfucking Stubbs]] - Another manly bastard, <s>famous for "losing" a hundred [[Baneblade]]s.</s>{{BLAM}}{{BLAM|LIES AND CHAOS PROPAGANDA!!! There is nothing written about the Baneblades being lost.}}
*[[Colonel "Iron Hand" Straken|Colonel "I ate a Miral landshark for breakfast" Straken]] - Yet another manly fucker and another solid contender for biggest balls in the Imperial Guard.
*[[Leman Russ Battle Tank|Knight Commander Pask]] - Ed Harris in 40k. A Leman Russ tank ace that has destroyed Titans and Gargants. With a Leman Russ.
*[[Colonel Greiss]] - Straken's former commander and proof that the manliest fuckers the Imperial Guard have aren't necessarily the biggest.
*[[Creed|Lord Castellan Usarkar E. Creed]] - Famous for outflanking enemies with Titans. Must have been the work of some sort of tactical geniu-CREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEED!!!
*[[Merrick]] - Tough bastard who survived a Tyranid Invasion, a Chaos uprising, ten years of nonstop combat, and putting a gun to his superior's head. Also fucking strong, since he can carry an entire heavy weapons setup on his own.
*[[Sly Marbo]] - ...by time you have read this... you are already dead... Gone, just like Creed's ability to scout titans, because GW hates awesome things.
*[[Doom]] Marine - because, why the hell not?
* Engineseers - All of them. Want to repair your own tank, do you? HERE'S THE FUCKING MANUAL. By the way, it's [[Heresy]] to do it yourself.
* [[Lord Commander Solar Macharius]] - A Brilliant tactician who [[Gets Shit Done]] (in fluff) and the most useless command choice from the Second Edition Codex: Imperial Guard who would habitually screw up your entire battle plan since he rolled for his strategy rating on a D6 (which decided who got the first turn) and 4-6 would stop you firing your army-fucking pre-battle barrage. On a 6 you also had to put everything you had in reserve on the table. He also had no model and the fluff gave no idea what he looked like. IMPROVED IN 3RD ED WHEN HE GOT BETTER RULES AND A MODEL: Baseline stats are: WS D3+2, BS4, S3, T3, W4, I4, A D3+1, LD10
**Because he is slow in his old age, he has an initiative of 4, which is pretty bad, but he can potentially have four attacks with a mastercrafted power weapon at a WS of 5. He's still too wild of a character to use in a serious game, so save him for your fuck-around games, or Apocalypse.
**In conclusion, he has a terrible crunch but have a ridiculously awesome fluff being as the most successful Warmaster ever existed since the Great Crusade
*Colonel Schaeffer - The most crazy, malicious, heinous and downright evil imperial guard officer to ever exist. Most other officers are either incompetent when battlefield tactics are concerned or egocentric to the point of believing nothing else around them has a pulse, ultimately resulting in the average footslogger having such a brief lifespan. Colonel Schaeffer on the other hand, intends to make those under his command suffer in the most grueling, painful and surprisingly productive way possible.
*Colonel Jurten - Nuked the living shit out of his own planet, 'cuz Krieg ain't belonging to no one but the Big E. Then inhabited it solely with clones, mostly of himself.
*[[Commander Kubrik Chenkov]] "Now see here comrade, is all for great glory of great Stalin empero- Нет! Вернись , свинья ! {{BLAM}} What happens when a soviet commander gets transplanted into 40k. Known for being the most famous user of the "send in the next wave" tactic, [[Grimdark|wherein a squad of 50 conscript guardsman are sent into a charge and another is sent in immediately when they all inevitably die]]. The biggest waste of flesh the Imperial Guard will likely ever see, he's only survived by dint of never running out of soldiers, if he were to ever run out of men, he'd be executed as an incompetent.

==Main Advantages of Fielding an Imperial Guard Army==
*Shit loads of men to throw around the battlefield[[File:tautears.png|500px|right|thumb|Sweet, sweet salty tears.]]
*'''[[Basilisk Artillery Gun|BASILISKS]]'''
*'''[[Baneblade|BANEBLADES]]'''
*'''[[Manticore Rocket Launcher|MANTICORES]]'''
*'''[[Leman Russ Battle Tank|LEMAN RUSSES]]'''
*'''[[commissar|*BLAM*]]'''
*[[Creed|Titans acting as scouts]].
*Reasonable prices for vehicles.
*Tank Squadrons.
*The first and best [[Hydra Flak Tank|Flak Tank]].
*Loyal soldiers that can and will [[Ollanius Pius|hold the line to the bitter end]].
*[[Commissar Yarrick]]
*Cool looking models and plenty of variety to choose from.
*Standard issue adamantium balls.
*'''YOU COULD NOT POSSIBLY FORGET THAT YOUR GUYS FIELD ''THE BEST TANKS OF THE GAME'', RIGHT?'''
*'''VANQUISHERS, FUCK YOU [[tau|BLUE SKINNED PANZIES]]'''
*Did we forget to mention that all units have standard issue balls of steel? Except for Yarrick. He has adamantium balls. And [[Sly Marbo|that guy in the cardboard box]]. <del>He has Power Balls.</del>(No one has ever been able to confirm what kind of balls he has (EXCEPT FOR YO MAMA! OOOOOH!) no one fucks with Sly is any form of the word and lives to tell the tale)

==<del>Downsides to being a Guardsman</del> Highly fanciful scenarios that most likely will not occur during your glorious service as a Guardsman==

While your local propaganda might say that being in the guard is the most honorable thing you could ever get into, and it is! Here is a small list of things that will very likely never happen to you and are entirely preventable with forethought, your trusty lasgun, and endless faith in the Emperor:

[[File:709869c659acffb373baece7b5d00582-d6lzjxz.jpg|right|thumb|300px|[[Awesome|Heroic last stands]] not included, [[Grimdark|but encouraged greatly]].]]

*You will die in the line of duty and no-one but your family and friends will remember you unless you've done something that only a Space Marine could do in combat. ''Anyone can do it!''
*You're expendable in every sense of the word. ''Freedom isn't free and you're the currency that pays for it!''
*Your Commissar might execute you to make your friends fight harder. ''You deserved it.''
*Your Commissar might execute your friends to make you fight harder. ''They deserved it.''
*Unless you're in a special forces division like the Kasrkin, you're really just a meatshield in large scale assaults. ''A glorious, spiffy looking meatshield!''
*"See how great this is? Your very own laser gun!"
*You can't even die when you want to. ''You don't want to be a quitter, do you?''
*You might be: [[Chaos Space Marines|mutilated, disemboweled]], [[Tyranids|eaten alive]], [[Necron|disassembled into your component atoms]], [[Chaos Gods|sacrificed to the Chaos Gods]], [[Imperium|left for dead]], [[Dark Eldar|tortured for fun by xenos]], [[Chaos|mutants, heretics and zealots]], stuffed with shurikens and lasers better than yours, or blasted by railgun rounds. ''But you'll earn the eternal gratitude of the Emperor!''
*You will be sent into hopeless situations and your superiors expect you to fight without retreating or showing cowardice. ''Just do it, no one likes a crybaby!''
*You may be used as mine clearance. By being marched through the minefield. ''That's right boys, you can teach those dastardly mines who's boss by blowing them up!''
* Even if after losing your entire regiment, watching your last-minute friends die horrendous deaths, and generally do the most gruesome work to win the day; the minute Space Marines come crashing down from the sky; They'll take all the credit for it, even if the marines themselves attribute the win to you. ''They deserve it.''
* Those same Space Marines might [[Marines Malevolent|bomb you and the civilians you're trying to save into mulch because you're too weak to be worth rescuing.]] ''You deserve it, weakling.''
*You will be taken from your home planet and dropped on the other side of the universe to fight in a war you didn't know existed. ''Think of the interesting people you'll meet, and then subsequently possibly kill!''
*You will NEVER see your home planet again unless you are stationed there. In which case it is likely under siege by yet another one of the Imperium's foes, and will likely remain so for the remainder of your short life. ''Think of the interesting places you'll see, and then subsequently blow up!''
*5 Million of you dying under a four hour assault by orks, is considered a flawless victory by Segmentum Command (Then again that would likely be either a very large ork warband or a WAAAGH!, so GOOD JOB!). ''Better than 5 million and one, am I right?''
*If you fight along side Grey Knights, you will be *BLAMMED*, or mindfucked and lobotomized, after the battle in the interest of secrecy. ''Grey Knights don't exist, that's silly.''
*Hell, just fighting Chaos has a slight chance of you getting disposed off after the battle because the Inquisitor investigating your regiment thinks that you may be a slight, bit, tad tainted. ''You wouldn't want to spread that taint would you?''
*Even when your army are the only ones that still uses combined arms warfare, your army still sucks, since it's routinely losing entire brigades(Complete with Armor vehicles and aircraft) to any single bog-standard Space Marine and/or xeno mook. ''But not you! Your buddies and you can definitely take 'em!''

==Memorable Quotations==

[[File:Astra Militarum Symbol.jpg|right|400px]]

- "The enemies of mankind may employ dark sciences or alien weapons beyond Humanity's ken, but such deviance comes to naught in the face of honest human intolerance backed by a sufficient number of guns."

-DRIVE ME CLOSER! I want to hit them with my sword! (originally a meme that started from a picture of a Commissar standing up in a tank hatch brandishing his sword, the phrase became so popular it is one of Commissar Lord Bernn's in campaign/skirmish/multiplayer lines when he gets in a Chimera in Dawn of War II, Retribution)

- "When in doubt, throw more men at it."

- "Look at me. Look at me! ''This'' is home now, Trooper! This is the zone! It doesn't like you, but by the Throne, it's where you are! The Emperor wants you, boy! Did no one ever tell you that? The Emperor wants you to make his glory for him! And if you're scared, I'm terrified. The [[Chaos|archenemy]] is no playmate. You're going to see things, and be expected to do things your poor mother would have a fit at. But the Emperor expects, and the Emperor ''protects'', all of us, even you. Especially you - I promise you that." - [[Colonel-Commissar Ibram Gaunt]]

- "That which I cannot crush with words alone, I shall crush with the [[Baneblade|tanks]] of the Imperial Guard!"

- "You're a fearsome warrior! Act like it!" - [[Dawn of War II|General Castor]]

- "[[Commissar|You don't die until I say so!]]"

- "[[Commissar|Glory to the first man to die! CHARGE!!!]]"

- [[Grimdark|"Yes, you shall die when assaulting a well maintained fortress]] under a [[Creed|competent]] [[Commissar|commander]]. But at least strive to make your death useful." (Paraphrased)

- "We go beyond [[Astronomican |the emperor's light]]. To the darkest reaches in the galaxy. Good thing we brought our [[lasgun|flashlights]]!"

- "To each of us falls a task, and all the Emperor requires of us Guardsmen is that we stand the line, and we die fighting. It is what we do best: We die standing." - General Sturnn, Dawn of War: Winter Assault

- "All right men! TIME TO WAGE TO WAR!" - [[Sturnn]]

-"Remember, we have more numbers men!"-sergeant in skirmish/multiplayer line from Dawn of War II Retribution

- "Let's see them fight ALL of us!" Guardsman, Dawn of War: Soulstorm

- "Infantry wins firefights, tanks win battles, artillery wins wars." - Tactica Imperialis

- "A Guardsman's LIFE is to die. My job has always been to send them where they CAN die. I'm not afraid to spend men, but I never waste them!" - [[Dawn of War II|General Castor]]

-"Eldar suck they can't even save their mams never mind them selves" - some tank commander from the 319th Catachan tank company

- "Your foe is well equipped, well-trained, battle-hardened. He believes his gods are on his side. Let him believe what he will. We have the tanks on ours." - Colonel Joachim Pfeiff,
[[Death Korps of Krieg|Krieg]] 14th Armoured Regiment

- "Okay, okay, you caught me, (gasp), oh but look who it is! It's the God Emperor (pointing to his right)!!!" - Cornered Guardsman
"The God Emperor!?" - Sororitas
"You're all so STUPID!!!" - Fleeing Guardsman

- "We'd offer a pension if we thought you needed it..." - Unknown Recruiting Officer.

- "When in mortal danger, when beset by doubt, run in little circles, wave your hands and shout." - Parody of the Litany of Command. (More popular then you think)

- "LET ME PREACH HIS NAME!" - Priest

- "A good general does not lead an army to destruction just because he knows it will follow." - The Tactica Imperialis

- "If at first you don't succeed, bring heavier firepower!"

- "LAST ONE TO DIE'S AN ELDAR!"

- "They just keep coming!" Heretic Stevos, counting troop ships

==A Piece of Writing That Explains the Imperial Guard==
At the end of the day, though he's been ferried through [[Warp|hell]] on a ship that's ten thousand years old to some godforsaken, war-torn rock; though he deployed from high orbit with nothing but a grav chute; though he is one of ten million men and women snatched from his homeworld to fight a war he barely understands; though he has been given a weapon that fires small suns and may annihilate him as he fires because the knowledge of how it functions has been lost; though his company is supported by tractor-tanks that run on anything you can burn; though he wages war against a [[Tyranid|devouring hivemind]], ravenous [[Daemon|demons]] and [[Tau|hordes]] of [[Eldar|hyper-advanced aliens]] with strange technologies and sorceries he never dreamed existed; no one will remember his sacrifice, there will be no records of his deeds, no glorious parades in his honor, and no remembrance of his name. All he will earn is a shallow, unmarked grave on a forgotten world untold lightyears from home.

Yet for all this thankless sacrifice a Guardsman is a man, just like you. He has no [[Space Marines|millennia-old genetic engineering]], no [[Emperor|prophetic leader]], no [[Sisters of Battle|miracles of faith]]. He has his lasgun, his orders, and those beside him. He is the Imperial Guard.

[[Awesome|And he will hold the line.]]

==The Imperial Guard's anthems==
[[Image:UpliftingPrimer.jpeg|thumb|right|For more Imperial anthems, consult your [[Imperial Infantryman's Uplifting Primer|Uplifting Primer]].]]
While the Ecclesiarchy and several, if not all, Chapters of Space Marines look down upon the frivolities of music (unless said music is sung in somberly in High Gothic and praises the Emperor) as distracting to any soldier in carrying out his Divine Duty, the Imperial Guard still makes heavy use of marching themes and anthems. Examples are given below:

* [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L0bcRCCg01I] - Baleeted no longer
* [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XWBoMWZJkeI] - (none of that faggy 'murican shite)
* [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oxapTnODhCs] - A marching song that most Training worlds use to this day.
* [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HJNz2QgSNsk] - Standard cadence song sung by veteran units.
* [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X82ZIZW4FcI] - Sung at the Funeral of Fallen Death Korps soldiers.
* [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TjvKZHJeayg] - Vox recording of the Praetorian guard during their defence at the Massacre of Big Tooth river
* [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H1D6yatC0gM] - Cadian Victory rally horns
* [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mRIAw6LkqlE] - Again, a rumored anthem.
* [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hbw1pGUhG7Q] - This is sung by extremely hardcore and grim regiments, is rumored to have originated from Krieg.
* [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gS1lBID2Mtw] - Popular parade piece for the Phantine Air Corps
* [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t1-L6lMM-E8] - Sung at the funerals of the nameless heroes
* [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JCGB81DBzOc] - Rumored to be used by the Men of Tanith
* [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NyNANzc148c] - A lament for lost Tanith
* [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E9Tye_bzl9U] - Sung by many of the Imperial armored regiments
* [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=91kdwxFsthI] - National Anthem of the Valhallan Ice Warriors
* [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-ZujhoHZBsg]- National Anthem of the Death Korps of Krieg
* [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O9fSEdZIM08] - March of the Death Korps of Krieg
* [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XKROVhDb8Gc] - March of the Praetorian Lifeguard
* [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z5W1NCmV_OM] - Planetary Anthem of Cadia
* [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9NWEmnRbkRw] - Regimental march of the Kronus 1st "Liberators"
* [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dTaD9cd8hvw] - Heard being sung by Praetorian Hussars returning from deployment in the Crimean sector
* [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yo6KdeCvESw] - Sung by the guardsmen of the Armageddon Steel Legion
* [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IXH3QJrx98U] - Another favorite of the Steel Legion
* [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yUQCmDfKFac] - Often sung by Veteran Guardsmen of Cadia during planetary deployment between outbreaks of combat.
* [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VWgsdexkv18] - Elysian Drop Troops are sometimes required to memorize the lyrics as part of their training.
* [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yvy2_7d_VmI] - The Elysians also love singing that while they are maintaining their <strike>FAMAS</strike> Accatran Lasgun
* [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=26cr_rBQu74&list=UUlvMzsGbi7LACFNRPTLhJjw&index=10] - A traditional folk/drinking song of the Vostroyan Light Armor and Mounted regiments.
* [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TLV4_xaYynY] - Traditional Catachan folk song. Catachan Guardsmen are sometimes heard either humming, warbling or whistling this song while on Guard duty.
*[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V92OBNsQgxU] - This is song is inevitably played over loudspeakers whenever there are two or more Valkyries entering the battlefield.
*[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yVcD1gW-cQE] - This song begun to resurface throughout Valhallan Armored Regiments after a few joint missions with Knight Commander Pask's Cadian 423rd Armoured Regiment.
*[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O8LIiFbB6bk] - Anthem of the Tallarn Desert Raiders
*[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sZpbCLdg-r8] - Heard from a regiment of Storm Troopers surfacing from an extensive period hiding behind enemy lines on an Ork-controlled world.
*[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BnaF4_LTovk] - A list of Commonly sung Krieg songs.
*[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3uTnl78HLDQ]- Common song by the Elysian drop troops commemorating famous battles.
*[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pLAdSs9FUmo]- Sung by many Death Korps engineers.
*[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q5CaQ37VYvw]- A common tune by Valhallan snipers between warzones
*[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IrJAwCBbnuc]- Often sung by storm troopers during risky and/or frontal assaults on enemy forward positions or leading massive charges.
* [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6qb_mxoTV0A] - Vostroyan Firstborn Anthem
*[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7J__ZdvsZaE] - Commonly sung by Valhallan Armoured Regiments as they drive into battle
*[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZgVJVL94vM0] - A fight song of various Cadian regiments heard while on long marches or before an offensive push
*[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7JKar_hChU4] - Another Krieg March song.
* [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ift85e38H3M] - Schola Progenium's unofficial anthem.
*[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ut1If6vaD90] - Undisputed Anthem of the Imperial Guard.
*[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LjRskDUq_eM] - Popular among Atillan Rough riders Between deployments.
*[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NCdUfAE5Rz8] - Popular with stormtroopers
There is a disturbing lack of hell march in this list.
*see 42
*[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gfW1bkPI8Kc] - Chenkov's theme whenever he Sends in the Next Wave.
*[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8XufxjQUnyE] - Followed by battalions of tanks and artillery barrage.
*[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-ndbKTegN6A] - And this is when the Imperial Guard goes full-scale war, game over.
*[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mj2j7R1NL-s] - Funeral hymn utilized by multiple Guard regiments.
*[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ILsb_hospwY] - commonly sung by Vostroyan Rough Rider regiments.

==Notable Imperial Guard Forces==
Because GW was too lazy to create an original themed Imperial Guard army, they basically used RL armies as a base for them, gave them a little touch of [[grimdark]], assorted amounts of tempered ceramite balls and placed them... IIIIIINNN SPAAAACE!

*[[Cadia|Cadian Shock Troops]]: Generic occidental army/Colonial Marine clones... IIIIIINNN SPAAAACE! FOR [[Imperium|IMPERIUM]] AND [[Emprah|EMPEROR]]! <strike>COME ON YOU APES, YOU WANNA LIVE FOREVER?</strike> Shh! Who do you think we are? Chem-Dogs? Discipline, man! Discipline! You'll get the Commissar riled!
*[[Catachan Jungle Fighters]]: Vietnam War Australians and Americans... IIIIIINNN SPAAAACE! GOOD MORNING CATACHAN!
*[[Tallarn Desert Raiders]]: WWI Arabs and Bedouins... IIIIIINNN SPAAAACE! !الإمبراطور أكبر
*[[Armageddon Steel Legion]]: Wehrmacht mechanized divisions... IIIIIINNN SPAAAACE! FÜR DEN IMPERATOR, FEUER FREI!
*[[Valhallan Ice Warriors]]: Great Patriotic War Red Army... IIIIIINNN SPAAAACE! ЗА РОДИНУ! ЗА ИМПЕРАТОРА! НИ ШАГУ НАЗАД!
*[[Mordian Iron Guard]]: Dress blues clad US Marines (they fight and parade at the same time)... IIIIIINNN SPAAAACE! SEMPER FIDELIS AD IMPERATOREM!
*[[Death Korps of Krieg]]: WWI's Western Front (both sides), made extra grimdark... IIIIIINNN SPAAAACE!
*[[Vostroyan Firstborn]]: Cossacks... IIIIIINNN SPAAAACE! YOU WILL NOT MAKE SUBJECTS OF IMPERIAL SONS, FUCK YOUR MOTHER!
*[[Elysian Drop Troops]]: French and British paratroopers... IIIIIINNN SPAAAACE! QUI OSE GAGNE! POUR L'EMPEREUR! (Taros Campaign=Dien Bien Phu or Operation Market Garden)
*[[Harakoni Warhawks]]: American paratroopers... IIIIIINNNN SPACE! GREEN LIGHT!!! LET'S GO!
*[[Tanith First (And Only)]]: Scots and Welsh... IIIIIINNN SPAAAACE! TRWY CARIAD YRYMERAWDWR!
*[[Attilan Rough Riders]]: Mongols... IIIIIINNN SPAAAACE! ([[White Scars|Yes, again]])
*[[Savlar Chem Dogs]]: Post-apocalyptic raiders (and a bit of the Vietnam War tunnel rats )... IIIIIINNN SPAAAACE!
*[[Drookian Fen Guard]]: Anglo-Scottish border reivers... IIIIIINNN SPAAAACE!
*[[Praetorian Guard]]: Victorian British Army... IIIIIINNN SPAAAACE! PRAETORIANS NEVER YIELD! (Ever seen Zulu? Like that)
*[[Kanak Skull Takers]]: Cavemen (with some Apache)... IIIIIINNN SPAAAACE!
*[[Phantine Air Corps]]: Battle of Britain RAF... IIIIIINNN SPAAAACE!
*[[Phantine Skyborne]]: British Royal Commandos... IIIIIINNN SPAAAACE!
*[[Scintillan Fusiliers]]: 18th century French aristocrats... IIIIIINNN SPAAAACE

With such a large and diverse collection of units in the Imperial Guard that puts even the Space Marine armies to shame, you'd think that you'd have plenty of options for fielding an army, right? Well, I've got some bad news for you: Realistically, you can only field Cadians and Catachans in large numbers, as well as the Death Korps and Elysians if you're willing to pay [[Forge World]] prices. As for everyone else? Either discontinued, or frequently out of stock, and most of them are still in pewter, so good luck trying to get custom loadouts. Yes, some units like the Attilans or Vostroyans may seem too out there to have broad appeal, but you'd think at least the Steel Legion would get more support, what with their intimate involvement in [[Armageddon]], one of 7th Edition's Warzone settings.

==[[/tg/_40,000#Imperial_Guard | /tg/ Homebrew Guard Forces]]==
* [[Cendra#Armed_Forces |Cendran Abolishers]] Pyromaniacs who eat the burnt flesh of their enemies.
* [[Darmine#Darmine_Marshalls | Darmine Marshalls]] Elite sharpshooters supported by huge amounts of explosive collar-fitted penal troopers.
* [[Ferdain#Ferdain_Mustangs | Ferdain Mustangs]] Cavalry regiment that use genetically tailored horses that are practically heavy armour.
* [[Sauristoni#Armed_Forces| Sauristoni Ghostchasers]] Renowned scouts and trackers who are experts on Eldar.
* [[1st Membranes]] A regiment made almost entirely of psykers from a black ship that crashed on a forge world.
* [[Arianius Divided Regiments]] Regiments are segregated along gender lines. Men are [[Choppa|slicey]] women are [[Dakka|shooty.]]
* [[Kandam | Kandamii Crabhunters]] A regiment made up of Augmented soldiers who specialize in Oceanic and Aerial warfare.
* [[Terranknights | Terran Knights]] Elite regiments recruited exclusively from Terra. As a result they have some of the best equipment in the Imperium.
* [[Hell Harlots|2478th Penal Legion, "Hell Harlots"]] All-female penal legion close combat drop troops made up entirely of the same religious prison gang.
* [[All_Guardsmen_Party| Generian 99th Medium Infantry]] The original regiment of the [[All_Guardsmen_Party | All Guardsmen Party]] spawning some of the most dangerous, heretical, yet pragmatic acolytes in the entire inquisition.
*[[Hua Yuan Exterminators|Hua Yuan Exterminators]] Tyranid hunters and Hive warfare Specialists that use unique 'Color And Mayhem' tactics to disorient and daze in the cramped not!Honk Kong they're from. By far the most fleshed out /tg/ regiment to date.

==See Also==
*[[Lasgun]]
*[[Chem-chan]]
*[[Sentinel]]
*[[Hellhound]]
*[[Basilisk]]
*[[Leman Russ Battle Tank]]
*[[Baneblade]]
*[[Commissar]]
*[[Imperium]]
*[[Warhammer 40,000/Tactics/Imperial Guard|Tactics/Imperial Guard]]
*[[Only War]] - The official Tabletop RPG of the Guard!
*[[Kasrkin-chan]]
*[http://www.forgeworld.co.uk/The_Horus_Heresy/Solar_Auxilia] - The Imperial Guard before they became the Astra Militarum of today, The awesome looking [[Solar Auxilia|SOLAR AUXILIA]]! Thank the Emperor for [[Forge World]].

==Gallery==
{{Promotions}}
<center>
<gallery>
Image:Guardsman.jpg|<s>This is painfully accurate.</s> Except for missing the FUCKHEUG BALLS OF STEEL.
Image:Guardsmen.jpg|But this works too.
Image:Warhammer-orcs.jpg| Come and get some, fucking green-skinned faggots!
Image:Winterassault.jpg|Who needs Pauldrons?
Image:Greeting.jpg
image:Mira.jpg
Image:Repercussions.png|Commissar in action
Image:IG_(1).jpg|What the [[Jokaero]] should have been.
Image:balls.jpg|Imagine this, only 4 times bigger, heck even the women have 'em!
Image:IG_(2).jpg|<s>Shouldn't this instead be called 'Full Metal Flak-Jacket'?</s> FMJs are bullets,and lasrifles don't have bullets.
Image:Propaganda_by_DemonMads.jpg
Image:YoDawg.jpg
Image:IG_melta.jpg
Image:Catachan-n.jpg
Image:IG_Babes_(1).jpg
Image:IG_Babes_(2).jpg
Image:IG_Babes_(3).jpg
Image:IG_Babes_(5).jpg
Image:Kasrkin_chan_sans_helmet_by_Jaekyu.jpg
Image:Kasrkin_chan_by_Jaekyu.jpg|"Thank the Emperor! Action!"
Image:IG_Babes_(4).jpg
Image:Imperial_Guardswoman_by_IronShrineMaiden.jpg|Ponytails and light weaponry are standard issue.
Image:Krieg_chan_01_by_Jaekyu.jpg
Image:Krieg_chan_by_Jaekyu.jpg
Image:Tallarn_chan_Colored_by_FilthyBusiness.jpg
Image:1227223498011.jpg
Image:Vostroy_chan_by_Jaekyu.jpg|Vostroya is a cold and crappy place. Still people like it there. Guess why?
Image:IG_mot1.jpg
Image:IG_mot2.jpg
Image:IG_mot3.jpg
Image:F0r t3h Emp3r0r by Kazuv.jpg|Even pregnant chicks get conscripted.
Image:1267818498305.jpg|One should never underestimate the awesomeness of a Guardsman.
Image:Magnus Kale.png|Guardsmen - They Just Never Stop
Image:GuardsmanHelmet.jpg|This man shows doubt. He will soon be executed.
Image:1230085088983.png|[[wat]]
Image:Basilisk.png|[[Basilisk]]s are [[AWESOME]]
Image:Grimdark checkers.jpg|In the grimdarkness of the 41st millennium, there are still old men playing checkers.
Image:The Courage of Man.png|AVE IMPERATOR MOTHERFUCKERS!

</gallery>
</center>

{{Template:Imperium}}
{{40k-Imperial-Regiments}}
[[Category:Warhammer 40,000]][[Category:Imperial]]

Administratum

2016-06-11T09:16:40Z

2601:285:104:EAC0:B546:455B:1C5F:E921: /* Divisions */

[[File:Administratum.jpg|thumb|350px|The Administratum: more red tape than a planet can hold. We're not joking: there is a planet on the verge of a civil war because it is literally out of space on where to store the files.]]
''"The bureaucracy is expanding to meet the needs of the expanding bureaucracy."''

-Oscar Wilde

The '''Adeptus Administratum''' is the name of the pencil pushers of the [[Imperium of Man|Imperium of Man]]. Founded by [[Malcador the Sigillite]] back in the day the [[God-Emperor of Mankind|Emprah]] was strutting about, the Administratum is the bureaucratic division of the [[Adeptus Terra]]. They assess the tithes every world must pay to the Imperium, take census data, and maintain records. Unfortunately, a bureaucracy ten thousand years old and spanning most of the galaxy has created red tape that stretches for light years and inertia that can (and has) cost and caused wars. Imagine the Vogon equivalent of the Department of Motor Vehicles with all the grimdark of [[Warhammer 40,000]] and half of the productivity, then multiplied by the number of planets in the Imperium. The Adepts of a department will keep going about their duties long after their department has become completely useless because they will likely be executed for abandoning their position if they were to stop. That's the Administratum. It's run by the aptly named Master of the Administratum, who is the most powerful of the [[High Lords of Terra]] (because he can threaten to get anyone so bogged down in red tape they will never see the end of it in the span of their lives).

Life for the average Administratum paper pusher is safer than that of a guardsman or a factory serf toiling away on an assembly line for 14 hours a day in a factory complex on a world where 'safety codes' are a thing of legend and possibly considered borderline heresy by the nobility, but is not easy or pleasant by any means. Posts are generally hereditary and the standards of living are monastic baring the necessities to make more adepts. The general policy is that servants of the Imperium should have no loyalty to anything besides the Imperium and frivolities are discouraged as distraction, though there are those who get around it especially among the higher ups. Mostly what Administratum Adepts do is process what papers come their way for twelve hours between eating, washing and sleeping. This is before the fact that there is a complex web of departments, sub departments and so forth, which has in at least one case led to a war when the Administratum ''ran out of space in a solar system to put all their paperwork'' and couldn't decide what to do about it that rages on to this very day.

This environment can produce a number of amazing administrative savants such that if you dropped one of them with her trusty portable cogitator and pens in a mob of a million starved refugees with nothing but the clothes on their back, in a year she'll have organized them to the point that they've built a new city better than the ones they fled (these guys come up in The Black Library's books). The problem is that said environment also produces plenty of sapped office drones who are incapable of doing anything but their likely pointless task, petty tyrants who's only joy in life is lording what power their office has have over others, corrupt jerks who can do their jobs well but only do so when a few Imperials are slipped under the table and general morons who might be able to spell their name with only one letter out of place on the third try but never the less have positions of power because of their dad and remain in his job because the paperwork to remove him gets lost and forgotten (possibly deliberately by one of the previously mentioned corrupt jerks).

It should be noted however that the Administratum is an Imperial institution handling Imperial scale affairs. Planets mostly govern themselves and their local governments have their own bureaucracies to execute the wills of the governor and his associates. As said governors are largely free to set up their systems and are not bound by Administratum rules this makes things more difficult.

The rest of the Imperium routinely despises the Administratum; even the Adeptus Arbites and the Inquisition admit they are highly inefficient (in fact there's a whole Ordo with the sole role to cut as much red tape as possible). The Astartes and Guard are more straightforward in their thoughts, thinking that more than a few wars could be won if they gave each Admin adept a lasgun and sent them to the front lines. However, as much as they are disliked, all other departments need the Administratum, as they won't know where to go to start ordering basic supplies even if they were desperate enough to try. In the far grim future, the ordering form is a dark and mystical document that requires much ritual and mediation before it can be filled in.

==Divisions==
These are the various departments that we know exist however the fluff is kinda patchy and much of what we know comes from old, throwaway fluff written without much thought and as much grimdark as is humanly possible so it's kinda debatable how accurate any of it is these days, and remember, they only handle intergalactic matters, and very rarely interfere with planetary affairs unless it involves them in a way big enough to be bothered over it. They will gladly overlook genocidal interplanetary wars as long as those wars do not disrupt the tithe to the Imperium.

*'''Departmento Munitorum''': The section of the Administratum charged with running the [[Imperial Guard]]. Their duties encompass aspects ranging from estimating and managing manpower, weaponry, and supplies of the Imperial Guard, but the Guard is so massive that it's rare for the Munitorum NOT to make constant fuck-ups at the least convenient times. The Munitorum decides which planets have met their [[Imperial Tithe|tithe]] requirements or not, but on a few occasions rounding errors or misspellings have resulted in worlds being declared traitors or wiped out regiments being sentenced to death posthumously.
*'''Estate Imperium''': Charged with maintaining the records of the Imperium. The Chancellor of the Estate Imperium can occasionally get a spot on the High Lords of Terra. Well, were he not doped-up on anti-depressants to deal his raging OCD, anyway (that's fine though as the only thing he does is provide the Master of the Administratum with an extra vote).

*'''Historical Revision Unit''': The propaganda branch of the Imperium, charged with making sure Imperial history makes the Emperor and the Imperium look perfect and eliminating all knowledge of traitors. Because the Imperium wasn't grimdark enough, they cut/paste the [[1984|Ministry of Truth]] into one of their foundational institutions. However, they must have done it with Linux, because they didn't manage to get enough of in to really affect the universe. Although... there has been a shit ton of [[Matt Ward|'revisions']] to a wide variety of things to make various institutions look so unrealistically good that it defies sanity, and yet it has become 'fact'... Well played GW... On the other hand. This lack of knowledge of the very existence of traitors could be very useful in...other ways (Rebellious types still show up but it's much less likely to spread when most of society thinks that it's ''good'' that society is as fucked as it is.)

*'''Officio Agricultae''': The department charged with overseeing agriculture in the Imperium, serving to determine the tithes of the various agri-worlds that litter the Imperium, and making sure that that there is enough food to feed the people of the Imperium. Food will still not be distributed equally, however, and pretty much only the nobles and the Imperial Guard gets priority over food while civilians get whatever scraps are left. Food riots ensue. Or so the fluff says. But if you think about it there's no way food can be so scarce. It's been ten thousands years. If everyone is starving they would be dead by now. Sure there might be late shipments or whatever but it's really hard to create hive world with billions of people that last for millennia without a reliable food supply. Every society is three meals away from revolution, so unless future humans can subsist on algae this has to be wrong. It sounds real grimdark to say 'no food for you peasants because we are transparently evil dicks who need it for our huge blobs of cannon fodder' but it stops being practical ten seconds later. If the Imperium can manage the production lines for a billion lasguns they can manage to get corn to the next generation of guardsmen. (But then again this is considered 'British' humor).

*'''Officio Medicae''': The department charged with medical affairs of the Imperium. Unless you're a noble, Guardsman, or Inquisitor, you won't be getting access to any meaningful medical assistance without visiting a dread-inducing back alley doc, who is always located in the under[[hive]], smells of Obscura, and whose services cost an arm and a leg. Sometimes literally. If you do fall under the aforementioned categories, you are eligible for drugs and cybernetics that can keep you alive and kicking for a few centuries. Although certain Ecclesiarchal charities and missions do still provide medical treatment for the common citizens of the Imperium, just provided that they do not suspect anyone in your area of [[heresy]], which can turn a humble medical mission into a [[Exterminatus|crusade to burn your district or even your entire planet into ash]].

[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M0sAVtOt2wA| The Administratum in a nutshell.]
{{Template:Imperium}}
[[Category:Warhammer 40,000]][[Category:Imperial]]

Hellhound

2016-06-11T09:15:38Z

2601:285:104:EAC0:B546:455B:1C5F:E921: /* Hellhound */

[[File:Hellhound.jpg|300px|thumb|right|The Hellhound, the bane of [[Orks]] and [[Tyranids]] alike.]]
The '''Hellhound''' pattern tank and its variations are a series of light tanks fielded by the [[Imperial Guard]]; its main purposes are to provide fast fire support for the Imperial Guard, and to fuck the shit of anything that's hiding in cover.

==Overview==
The Hellhound uses a modified [[Chimera]] chassis: replacing its transport capabilities with a heavier engine to allow faster movement, promethium tanks (or equivalent, depending on the weapon in question), and heavier side armor. This increases the survivability of the tank for its primary purpose: to [[Salamanders|get close to the enemy and melt their faces off]]. The crew that volunteers for Hellhound duty tend to be a rather [[Magic:_The_Gathering|unhinged]] bunch that [[Sisters_of_Battle|love to set people on fire and watch them burn to death]].

BRO TIP: The only way these three tanks differ from each other is by the barrel of their weapons. Make them in such a way so you can swap between the flamer, chem and melta barrels to get more mileage out of your vehicles. The head of the weapon is a simple plug-in so it should be easy to just not glue them in place and swap between them as needed.

==Variations==
There are currently three patterns of the Hellhound in use: the Hellhound, the Bane Wolf and the Devil Dog. Like the Chimera, the Hellhound tank can field a hull-mounted [[Flamer|Heavy Flamer]] or [[Bolter|Heavy Bolter]], and can also field a [[Multi-Melta]].

===Hellhound===
The '''Hellhound''' is the classic pattern: by using a unique [[Flamer|flamethrower]] that allows the vehicle to project its burning payload over a very wide area, allowing the introduction to potentially over a dozen enemies to your good friend [[Imperial_Munitorum_Manual|Mister Yellow]]. This will fuck up anything that's not an [[MEQ]], including [[Tyranid]] and [[Necron]] Warriors, most [[Eldar|Aspect Warriors]], any [[Tau]] infantry, and any blob of the non-MEQ or [[Animu|moe]] variety. By far the most popular choice for pick up gamers.

This is by far the most useful variant, it gets to fire its template 12 inches out, then the template itself, meaning on first turn of 12 inch movement + 12 inch range + flame template = first turn roasting. This means you're never in actual danger of being assaulted unless it gets surrounded or out maneuvered. Have fun.

[[File:Banewolf.jpg|300px|thumb|right|The Banewolf. It is like having [[Nurgle]] throwing up onto your enemies.]]

===Bane Wolf===
When you want to fuck up MEQ. The '''Bane Wolf''' Chem Cannon is a Str 1 Poisoned (2+) Ap3 weapon, meaning that it is very likely to wound. Can be surprisingly effective against nearly any [[DISTRACTION_CARNIFEX|MC]] your Tyranid opponent can and will throw at you, on the accounts that it *will* wound. But do not forget, it can only cause *1* wound, so make sure to only do this if your target is down to its last. Unless you're feeling particularly ballsy and squadron them. Beware that the cannon only has template range, so be ready for nasty retaliation in the form of melta(bombs) by any surviving unit members.

[[File:Devil_Dog.jpg|300px|thumb|left|The Devil Dog. Note the tank commander [[Meme|who wants to be driven close to the enemy, so he can hit them with his Melta Cannon.]]]]

===Devil Dog===
Sometimes there are no alternatives. Sometimes you just want to strap on your [[Power_weapon|Power Fist]] and punch a dude through the chest. When all else fails there's the '''Devil Dog'''; fielding the unique [[Melta Cannon]], once the ''only'' Blast weapon to have the Melta rule in the entire game (although there is near half dozen of them now). Though this means that it has a bizarre roll against armor (8+2d6 against vehicles within short range, 8+1d6 at long range), it is perfect to vaporise anything with a 2+ save or multiple wounds without Eternal Warrior. Remember that the tears of a [[Grey Knight]] player whose entire unit of [[Matt_Ward|Paladins]] was just vaporised by a 130 point tank are considered a delicacy on [[/tg/]]. Bottle them and share them with the [[Neckbeards|guys]] at your [[LGS|local game store]].

Trivia: The term "Devil Dog" comes from a nickname of the U.S.M.C.
{{Template:40k-Imperial-Vehicles}}
[[Category:Warhammer 40,000]][[Category:Imperial]][[Category:Vehicles]]

Vindicator

2016-06-11T08:59:25Z

2601:285:104:EAC0:B546:455B:1C5F:E921:

[[Image:BLVind.jpg|right|thumb|A [[Chaos]] Vindicator, when daemonically possessed, is also known as [[rape]].]]
The Vindicator is a Siege Tank, and widely considered one of about two good ideas that [[Roboute Guilliman]] has ever had. Functionally a massively bulked-up [[Rhino Transport]] whose transport capacity has been omitted for ammunition storage, extra armor, and a formidable main weapon - a [[Imperial_Ordnance|Demolisher Cannon]] - the Vindicator is a close-range powerhouse, the epitome of the Self Propelled Gun. When it comes to breaking through the reinforced walls of a citadel, destroying squads with a single devastating explosion, or blasting foes out of cover, the Vindicator is brutally uncompromising. Just about every Space Marines army (Loyalist and Otherwise) can find a use for the damned thing, and any sane player fears this thing's ability to devastate anything from a tank to a line of infantry in a single high-explosive-packed shell.

==Overview==
The Vindicator is one of those vehicles that doesn't seem terribly good until you actually see it in action. To many newer players, the Vindicator is extremely deceptive; its short range (24" - same range as a [[Bolter]] or [[Lasgun]]) means it fires infrequently compared to more conventional tanks, its armor on everything except its front is meager, and its "A Rhino With a Gun" appearance tends to draw people into a sense of security. In truth, however, it's potentially the most threatening vehicle on the battlefield if used correctly; one single shell from it can completely change the outcome of a given mission by turning a high-value target or squad into a crater. In general, the Demolisher Cannon the Vindicator fires - a Strength 10, AP2 Ordnance Large Blast weapon - will come remarkably close to earning the Vindicator's points cost back with one shot. If it can survive to fire off multiple shells, the amount of punishment it can crank out far exceeds many other vehicles of its points-cost. e.g. oh, look is that a squad of Honour guard including a captain? *BLAM* No. Terminator armour? *BLAM* No.

Perhaps best of all, 6th edition vehicle rules buffed it. Glancing hits no longer cause Crew Shaken/Stunned. While experienced enemies could stunlock your poor Vindicator in 5th edition and keep it from ever firing a single shot for the whole game, 6th edition Vindicators can actually get a shot of its own off. And anything that tries to trade hits with a Vindicator is going to end up dead in very short order (at least until the Vindicator runs out of Hull Points). Furthermore, with no more halving strength on partials against vehicles, Vindicators now can demolish multiple tightly-packed vehicles in one shot, so even a deployment of this tank can discourage [[Imperial Guard|certain]] [[Tau|armies]] from building tank walls to mess with your LoS and pathing.

Inexpensive, powerful, and incredibly dangerous to ignore, its main drawback is that it's a colossal fire-magnet and that enemies experienced with them will [[DISTRACTION CARNIFEX|devote ''enormous'' amounts of firepower to the Vindicator's removal]], or spend the entire game doing their damnedest to get the fuck away from the things. Its fragile side and back armor means that it usually is fairly easily disabled and/or destroyed if outflanked, though the Repair rule can somewhat mitigate cases of the latter. The [[Blood Angels]] [[Rape|vindicator is a Fast tank.]]

Also 6th Edition allow pre-measuring so you can measure where the optimal spot to place each large blast without having to worry if it get out of range.

==Variants==
Vindicators are used by both the Loyalist and Traitor Marines, seeing more use with the latter due to the Chaos Marines' version being a hell of a lot better for the faction fielding it. In addition to obvious upgrades, like Extra Armor, the Chaos Vindicator can pack a Combi-Weapon (Bolter, plus a one-shot secondary weapon, useful for that initial rush into combat), can mount a Dirge Caster (no Overwatch within six inches), and most notably, a [[Havoc Launcher]], which lets the Vindicator fire off a long-range weapon for when it can't move into close-combat. The king of upgrades for it, by and large, however, is Daemonic Possession, which eliminates Crew Stunned and Crew Shaken results on a two up, but reduces the Vindicator's BS to 3. Any Vindicator with this upgrade is virtually guaranteed to last long enough to get a shot off, and it's not as if you care if a template that large scatters two inches anyway.

'''Deimos Pattern Vindicator Tank Destroyer''' - One day some Space Marines saw the Imperial Guard shooting rapier laser destroyers out of Chimeras, and got mad that they couldn’t do that party trick with their no-bulky-allowed Rhinos. So they sat down, had a beer (the Space Wolf representative brought enough Fenrisian for everybody), and thought: “We can’t put the rapier in a metal box so…let’s just take the gun and mount it on a metal box!” “And give it MOAR POWAH!” shouted a techmarine from the other end of the table. And thus the Vindicator Tank Destroyer was born.

Unlike the rapier’s 36” range and AP2, the Tank Destroyer’s laser destroyer array has 48” range and AP1. On top of that, if the tank doesn’t move it becomes Ordnance 2, and can choose to overcharge to Ordnance 3, at the cost of a pseudo Gets Hot.

The Vindicator Tank Destroyer can also be taken by Chaos Space Marines too. Daemonically possessed laser destroyer? Yes, please.

{{Template:40k-Imperial-Vehicles}}
{{Template:Marines-Forces}}
{{Template:Chaos-Official}}

Inquisition

2016-05-27T08:20:37Z

2601:285:104:EAC0:B546:455B:1C5F:E921: /* Philosophies */

[[File:Inquisitorial_Symbol.png|thumb|100px|right|The official seal and symbol of the Inquisition. Variations exist.]]
<center> [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nf_Y4MbUCLY '''NOBODY EXPECTS THE IMPERIAL INQUISITION!''']
 - ''Lord Inquisitor Ximénez''</center>

''It does not follow that because the devil has been given power over someone on account of his sins, that power must come to an end on the cessation of the sin.''

-Malleus Maleficarum

Also known as the [[God-Emperor of Mankind|Emperor]]'s pet psychopaths - at least according to [[Commissar]] [[Ciaphas Cain|Cain]]. Strange how he gets away with this [[heresy]]. (It was because the Inquisitor writing it was his lover, and he was probably dead when it was published.)

MP jokes aside, the Holy Orders of the Officio Inquisitorus, or just Inquisition, are the "secret" police and internal investigators of the [[Imperium of Man]], the eponymous hunters of the alien, the mutant and the heretic. The inquisition is a semi-omnipotent organization that has authority over every other organization and watch every single life in the Imperium for the slightest signs of heresy 1984-Big Brother style. On the plus side, though, literally ANYONE can become an inquisitor if they really impress and win all their FOR THE EMPRAH rolls; really, even hab worker #343332791984. The Emperor and his guards are the only people in the Imperium beyond their jurisdiction; even the High Lords can be (and were) subject to Inquisitorial investigation. Plus they're FUCKING ASSHOLES! (Most of them, but there are a couple that are sympathetic. Key word being COUPLE.)

==History==
[[Image:Inquisitors.jpg|thumb|300px|right|Bet you weren't expecting that.]]

So when it became obvious that the Emperor's plan to starve the [[Chaos Gods]] with [[Imperial Truth|atheism]] was a failure due to the [[Horus Heresy]], the Big E ordered [[Malcador the Sigillite]] with the formation of the Inquisition. Charged with finding "men of character" to seek out the [[heresy|heretic]], the [[xenos|xeno]], the [[daemon]], and the unexpecting, the Inquisition serves as the secret protectors (or murderers) of the [[Imperium of Man]], guarding it from those who would destroy it from within, from without, and from [[Warp|beyond]].

As part of their duties, [[Inquisitor]]s have damn near unlimited power, up to and including [[Exterminatus|the destruction of worlds]]. If they have good cause, they can demand service from anyone, from lowly citizens to the [[High Lords of Terra]]. The only people officially exempt from this are the [[Adeptus Custodes]], who can legitimately say they have a more important job in guarding the Emperor on the Golden Throne. In practice, though, Inquisitors tend to at least say "please" and "thank you" when they require service from the more powerful Imperial organizations, especially [[Space Marines]], since they tend to get turfy about taking orders from any non-Space Marine save the Emprah. Those who don't tread lightly tend to get a close encounter with a [[chainsword]].

"''Innocence proves nothing.''"

Inquisitorial motto

== Organization ==

[[File:PPI.jpg|thumb|right|300px|[[Heresy]], [[chaos]], and [[xenos]]. These were the most dangerous threats to the [[Imperium]] that were foreseen, but the [[Emprah]] of Mankind suddenly foresaw something more threatening than the three: EXTRA HERESY. Thus, the Inquisition was born! Using their ultra abusive authority, the [[Ordo Malleus]], [[Ordo Hereticus|Hereticus]], and [[Ordo Xenos|Xenos]] have dedicated their lives to defending the Imperium, and killing the enemies of the Emprah!]]

The Inquisition is unique among Imperial departments in that it has no formal definition of a hierarchy or structure. However, [[Inquisitor]]s with common interests tend to band together to tackle issues too large for a single Inquisitor, and over time, these coalitions have coalesced into bodies called ''Ordos'' which specialize in handling a particular class of threat to the Imperium. Inquisitors will also form looser, smaller groups called ''conclaves'' to handle specific threats -- for example, a single [[Tyranid]] invasion, or threats pertaining to a particular planet. Conclaves usually include members of a single Ordo, but there's no rule against having multiple Ordos represented, and some Inquisitors actively form conclaves with experts in diverse fields.

There are three ''Ordos Majoris'' in the Inquisition:

*[[Daemonhunters|Ordo Malleus]] - They are guys who hunt [[daemon|daemons.]] This branch works with the [[Grey Knights]].
*[[Witch Hunters|Ordo Hereticus]] - Guys who like to hunt [[wizard|witches]], [[heresy|heretics]] and [[furry|mutants]]. This branch works with the [[Sisters of Battle]].
*And the [[Alienhunters|Ordo Xenos]] - The guys who fight aliens. All the time. This branch works with the [[Deathwatch]].

Several ''Ordos Minoris'' exist as well, although their exact number is uncertain (especially because an Ordo is only as big as the number of Inquisitors who care about its particular issue -- the factor that separates the major Ordos from the minor ones is that there are always plenty of daemons, heretics, and xenos to go around, while other threats rise and fall in prominence). The best-known (relatively speaking) are as follows:

*Ordo Aegis- They help with keeping the Cadian Gate secure.
*Ordo Astartes- They try to keep some degree of control over the [[Space Marines]], with "try" being the operative word. Some recent breakthroughs have been made with the introduction of [[Vindicare|Ork Sharpshooters]] and [[Minotaurs|dickery]].
*Ordo Astra- They keep stellar maps up to date.
*Ordo Barbarus- They watch over pre-industrial worlds to make sure Chaos cults can't spring up on them.
*[[Ordo Chronos]] - They specialize in the possibility of time travel (particularly because time in the Warp doesn't flow normally), and they sought to deal with temporal anomalies, such as a ship reaching its destination before it actually left its starting point. Unfortunately for them, they just up and vanished without a trace. Nobody knows where they went and as a result this Ordo has been essentially forgotten by the rest of the Inquisition.
*Ordo Custodum- They make sure Holy Terra stays secure and devoid of heretics.
*Ordo Desolatus- Purpose unknown. For some odd reason it only has one member.
*Ordo Excorium- They make sure nobody tries to call in an [[Exterminatus]] without having a good reason for it first. The Imperium could probably use more of them, seeing as Exterminatus seem to happen all the time for things that could probably have been resolved in other ways. They are doing their job since by official statistics, over 90% of Inquisitors who declared a single Exterminatus were stripped of their rank and declared heretics for this exact reason. But they really need to put some effort to prevent such kind of behavior. Print some guidelines or something.
*Ordo Machinum - They ensure that the [[Adeptus Mechanicus]] properly integrate STC variants (and the occasional piece of xenos tech) into Imperial technology while also trying to keep their hoarding tendencies to an acceptable level.
*Ordo Militarum - Their role is to ensure that the Imperial armed forces remain loyal. The [[Commissar]]iat is their child organization.
*Ordo Necros- Nobody's entirely sure what they do, but since they apparently needed an entire Ordo to supervise them (The Ordo Vigilus), it must be really important. Something to do with the [[Necron]]s, maybe? (Looking after the [[C'tan|Void Dragon]]?) Something to do with a nature of death and the afterlife? In any case, someone was and is really fucking worried about them and whatever the hell they're doing.
*Ordo Originatus- They act as the Inquisition's historians, attempting to sift through ten thousand years' worth of myths and legends for the few grains of truth that remain.
*Ordo Obsoletus- only mentioned in the fluff a few times, the Inquisitions official department of What The Fuck just happened here? Tends to chase up inexplicable events like the Legion of the Damned turning up. Basically the 40th millennium's X-Files. Tend to be suspicious about miracles.
*Ordo Redactus- The Inquisition's equivalent of the Ministry of Truth, which makes sure that the secrets of the Inquisition's past stay secret. Naturally, this can be quite a problem for the Ordo Originatus if the two don't work together.
*Ordo Thanatos - Unknown purpose. Considering though they are named after the Greek word for death, it points to their purpose having some relation to death, perhaps investigating means of immortality?
*Ordo Sanctorum- This branch keeps a close eye on the [[Ecclesiarchy]] so a second Reign of Blood doesn't occur.
*Ordo Scriptorum- Like a grimdark version of the NSA, they examine and investigate written records and communications and try to cut through the Administratum's red tape when doing so would keep the Imperium safe and secure. Occasionally referred to as the Ordo ISO 9000.
*Ordo Scriptus- Oversees official historical records on Terra. Since they only have 6 (Inquisitorial) members, they most likely make use of great amounts of administratum resources, and even then they are constantly and horribly out of date.
*Ordo Senatorum- Unknown purpose. Perhaps it has something to do with the [[High Lords of Terra|Senatorum Imperialis]] and their staff?
*[[Ordo Sicarius]] - They watch over the [[Officio Assassinorum]] to make sure that they don't try to repeat [[The Beheading]].
*[[Zombiehunters|Ordo Sepulturum]] - They're dedicated to fighting plagues and diseases, but mainly the Zombie Plague and the zombies that result.
*Ordo Vigilus - their purpose is to keep an eye on the Ordo Necros. Someone must have been really concerned by Necros to make an Ordo for the sole sake of keeping an eye on an Ordo.

And nice red uniforms OH DAMN.

Most of the Ordos are very straightforward, doing jobs that are necessary to keep the Imperium running and acting as checks and balances to other powerful organizations in the Imperium, making sure at least most of the various factions play nice while they're around to do important things.

(More or less how they act on /tg/ - [[Media:I.png]]

==Hierarchy==
[[Dark Heresy]] gives us a look at the inner workings of the Inquisition in how they operate and recruit people. Many of them come from nearly every other organization of the Imperium, with a few criminals and death cultists thrown in.

*Acolyte - these are the guys who get recruited (or press-ganged) into the Inquisition's service, for the long term that is. While an Inquisitor can commandeer anyone they need for a particular mission, these agents officially belong to the Inquisition and have received training for their part in the organization. Reasons for recruitment can vary between a person's skills being seen as valuable, to the person in question has seen too much but can be put to use instead of purged, or if the person in question is simply expendable. Acolytes are often servants or meatshields for inquisitors, but if a particular agent shows a high degree of resourcefulness, they may be selected for becoming an inquisitor's personal retinue.
*Throne Agent - An Inquisitor's trusted aides, they tend to be more experienced than acolytes and aid in investigations. Throne Agents who are especially talented with a history of success may be recommended to become Inquisitors themselves.
*Explicator - Apprentice Inquisitors, they train directly under an Inquisitor on how to investigate.
*Interrogator - Inquisitors in training sent out into the field. They have their own rosettes and can order people around, but still lack the authority to perform independently. Once they have enough field and leadership experience they get promoted by the approval of three Inquisitors or one Inquisitor Lord.
*Inquisitor - the full monty. These are the guys who get to root out Heresy, order Exterminatus, rope entire armies into service, and so forth.
*Inquisitor Lord - Not a rank per se, rather a title that recognizes the power and influence of an individual inquisitor. Invitation-only and requires the agreement of three existing Inquisitor Lords. They tend to be the oversees of a particular conclave.
*Master - One of, if not the Head Honcho for a sub-sector.
*Grandmaster - Like the master, but for an entire sector.
*Inquisitorial Representative - The elected representative to the [[High Lords]].

==Philosophies==

The Inquisition is a big and complicated place, and many have different philosophies on how to protect the Imperium and stop [[Chaos]]. While there are dozens of doctrinal and philosophical disputes, the two important branches are either Puritans or Radicals. Both are fucked up assholes.

===Puritans===
Puritans, simply put, are those who refuse to employ the measures of the enemy, such as xenotech or the Warp. Most Inquisitors start out as Puritans or on the spectrum of Puritanicalism, but a number of them fall into Radicalism eventually (which can be classed as lesser heresy in its most extreme forms). Puritanism can fall among three major philosophies:

*{{anchor|Amalathianism}}'''Amalathianism''': The most conservative form of Puritanism in the Inquisition, Amalathians (named after Mount Amalath, where its tenets were first set down at an Inquisitorial conclave) believe that the Emperor has some sort of divine plan for the Imperium, and the Inquisitions purpose is to protect the Imperium as that plan becomes visible. Change is considered the greatest enemy (which may have [[Tzeentch|some sense to it]]), with the exception that they seek to overcome the factionalism so common within the [[Adeptus Terra]]. The irony that the Amalathians are themselves technically a faction is not lost on them. You'd think that a group which holds the Imperium at present is perfect would be off its rocker, but they're actually a fairly reasonable group who prefer to [[/tg/ gets shit done|get shit done]] rather than bicker and bitch over territorial disputes. [[Gregor Eisenhorn]] was once a staunch Amalathian, but he eventually fell into Radicalism in his later years.
*{{anchor|Monodominant}}'''Monodominant''': The most extreme form of Puritianism in the Inquisition, Monodominants are basically [[Humanity Fuck Yeah]] taken to its illogical extreme. They believe that humanity, and ''only'' humanity, should be allowed to continue to exist. Given that the average inhabitants of the galaxy are [[Eldar|space pansies who would abandon you in a heartbeat]], [[Dark Eldar|space pansies who would torture and rape you in a heartbeat]], [[Ork|green hooligans who would fight and kill you in a heartbeat]], [[Tyranid|giant spacebugs who would eat you in a heartbeat]], [[Necron|undead robots who would atomize you in a clock tick]] and [[Chaos|things much worse]], this is [[Grimdark|an understandable worldview]]. Unfortunately, the Monodominants take things a few steps further, wanting to eliminate all [[mutant]]s, including the [[Psyker]]s ([[Astropath]]s and [[Navigator]]s) that humanity needs to keep functioning, as well even [[Space Marines]]. 
*{{anchor|Thorianism}}'''Thorianism''': The most radical form of Puritanism, Thorians are named after [[Sebastian Thor]], the hero of the [[Age of Apostasy]], and believe that Thor held part of the power of the Emperor within him. The Thorians thus believe that it is possible to reincarnate the Emperor of Mankind into a new body, allowing him to rebuild the Imperium and launch a new [[Great Crusade]]. As a result, Thorians closely study the nature of the human consciousness and the Warp, while also keeping a close eye on individuals that show enough power to be potential hosts for the Emperor's soul (such as Living Saints). They are extremely close to the [[Ecclesiarchy]]. 
**{{anchor|Anomolian Beholders}}'''Anomolian Beholders''': A conservative branch of Thorianism which takes a more passive approach to the resurrectionist ideology; they are more content with observing humanity for signs of the God-Emperor's return than actively trying to bring him back. 
**{{anchor|Ardentites}}'''Ardentites''': A variation of Thorian belief that claims the power of the Emperor was dispersed throughout humanity as a whole rather than being concentrated in any one individual. Derisively referred to as "miracle chasers" by the rest of the Inquisition for their many failed attempts at proving their beliefs.

===Radicals===

<center> "Salvation comes with a cost. Judge us not by our methods, but what we seek to accomplish."
 - '' lord inqusitor "illusive man" cerberus'' </center>
Radicals are those Inquisitors who believe in fighting fire with fire--specifically, using the weapons of the enemy against the enemy. According to [[Gideon Ravenor]], Radicalism is an inevitable product of an Inquisitor's ideology being tested, as the more one learns about the nature of the enemy, the more they realize that the enemy has a lot better toys than the Imperium. However, given that most Inquisitors will face Chaos at some point, and given the inherently corrupting nature of the Warp, Radicalism may lead to one hoping to fight the Archenemy with its own tools before brought into the service of the Chaos Gods instead; consequently, an accusation of Radicalism is only slightly less serious than an accusation of outright heresy. Radicalism can fall into a lot more branches than Puritanism, and the following is merely a list of the most common forms it can take:

*{{anchor|Horusians}}'''Horusians''': One of the most dangerous forms of radicalism, Horusians (named after [[Horus|Horus Lupercal]]) believe that power the Chaos Gods imbued Horus with to fight the Emperor can be used to create a new body for the Emperor. Mostly consists of older Inquisitors who have become angry with the other resurrection theories failing to get shit done.
*{{anchor|Istvaanism}}'''Istvaanism''': One of the most violent forms of Radicalism, Istvaanians (named for the virus-bombing of Istvaan III, which began the Horus Heresy) believe that conflict is desirable, and mankind only grows in a state of violence (while it is said that "necessity is the mother of invention", the culture in 40k minimizes technological advancements). In practice, this leads to various conflicts that would otherwise remain minor suddenly becoming unmanageable because an Istvaanite was covertly funneling resources to one or both sides. Possibly the only group in the galaxy who views the Imperium's biggest problem as too ''few'' wars.
*{{anchor|Recongregationism}}'''Recongregationism''': Radicals who believe that the Imperium has become stagnant and corrupt, and needs to be rebuilt lest it collapse further. Unfortunately for them, they aren't entirely sure about how to do this, or how it should be rebuilt after tearing down the old order. Some of the more extreme Recongregators end up like Lilean Chase, an Inquisitor who fell to Chaos and founded the Cognitae (or at least its ''40K'' incarnation), arguably these inquisitors may be the closest thing to <s>the modern views of western society</s> Inquisitors giving a crap about ordinary people, as shown in a small story one of them used a cadre of Xenos Hunters composed of Space Marines from dubious chapters ([[Black Dragons]], [[Flame Falcons]], etc) to simultaneously stop a [[Necron]] incursion and topple an oppressive planetary government with the hope something better will go out of the consecutive population uprising.
*{{anchor|Revivificationism}}'''Revivificationism''': Essentially the radical form of Thorianism, Revivificators believe in studying the effects of death and dying so that they can reverse the process and revive the Emperor of Mankind. Revivificators have a deep interest in studying the Eldar as a result, and have less ties to the Ecclesiarchy.
*{{anchor|Xanthism}}'''Xanthism''': The most overt and well known form of Radicalism, Xanthians (named after Lord Inquisitor Zaranchek Xanthus, executed for heresy in M32) believe that using Chaotic artifacts such as possessed swords and Daemonhosts are viable weapons against the Archenemy which should be used whenever possible. They hold that only by controlling the power of Chaos can Chaos be defeated. Eisenhorn eventually followed Xanthism after being forced to use Cherubael to save the lives of his retinue. (Most of the time, this ends up spectacularly backfiring when their tools rebel at the worst possible time- or worse, corrupt them into the service of Chaos. The Ruinous Powers hate each other, but they aren't always complete idiots about it, and when you play with fire, you only have to drop it once to set the whole house ablaze.)
**{{anchor|Phaenonism}}'''Phaenonism''': A splinter group of Xanthism, considered extreme even by other Radicals. Their dabbling with tech-heresy alongside the traditional Xanthite methods led them to openly deny the Emperor's divinity and embrace the powers of the Warp, seeking to rebuild the Imperium in their own image. Despite being declared Excommunicate Traitoris, there are still some Phaenonites in the Inquisition, although they have taken great caution to conceal their allegiances from their fellow Inquisitors.
*{{anchor|Libricars}}'''Libricars''': An extreme version of Amalthianism that insists that even the smallest deviations from the status quo warrants purging. Unlike the Amalthians, they will do absolutely ''anything'' to ensure the status quo. Needless to say, the Recongregators hate them.
*{{anchor|Oblationists}}'''Oblationists''': Bizarro Monodominants that insist that the truly righteous (i.e. themselves) must allow themselves to be damned through the use of the Warp, the xenos, and the unclean to keep humanity safe. At the same time they believe that anyone else using these things will be hopelessly damned and ought to be purged. The hypocrisy of this is lost on them.
*{{anchor|Ocularians}}'''Ocularians''': A minor faction obsessed with learning how to predict and divine the future, no matter the cost of doing so.
**{{anchor|Antiquarti}}'''Antiquarti''': A subgroup of Ocularians that seek to predict the future by discovering patterns within events in the past. That wouldn't be hard if anyone allowed them to see the few books on the past, since no one teaches history in the grimdark future.
*{{anchor|Polypsykana}}'''Polypsykana''': A group that believes humanity is evolving into a fully psychic race (which appears to be true) and that it is a good idea for them to do everything they can to accelerate this process (which is clearly arguable). They do this by trying to protect nascent psykers from their Puritan colleagues, though they have also been known to harbor witches and other rogue psykers as well.
*{{anchor|Seculos Attendous}}'''Seculos Attendous''': A minor faction that views the [[Ecclesiarchy]] as an obstacle to mankind's progress and seeks to weaken it wherever they can. They're probably the only group of people in the Imperium who have realized that fact. A shame that they can't agree on what to replace it with on the absurdly tiny chance they succeed.
*{{anchor|Casophilians}}'''Casophilians''': Another branch of Thorianism interested in learning how to summon a deceased soul back to the Materium in the hope that doing so could be the first step to resurrecting the Emperor. (In practice, this would probably resemble a form of "reverse daemon summoning".) Relatively conservative by Radical standards, they are one of the few factions that can be considered open to new ideas and are known to work especially well with the Anomolian Beholders.
*{{anchor|Xeno Hybris}}'''Xeno Hybris''': A small group which sees strict anti-alien policies as being counter-productive to the Imperium of Man. They feel that sometimes Xenos can be useful or be learned from, especially when working against chaos. Many inquisitors of the Ordo Malleus in particular will do this to deal with the forces of chaos every now and again, but the Xeno Hybris makes seeking said cooperation their hat. At the very least, these guys are not tempting fate to the same extent by as other Radicals since their toys are much less likely to eat their souls. Even so, this position would most likely be more popular if the aliens the Imperium deals with on a regular basis were less of a bunch of dicks themselves or consists of [[Slaugth|Humanoid Maggots]] and other horrors that not even the Tau will try to convince to join the Greater Good.

==Song==
([http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NUMkcBctE7c tune])

The eye that sleepth not.

The Inquisition (Let's begin)

The Inquisition (Look out, sin)

We have a mission

To kill all the Xenos (Xenos, Xe-e-nos)

We're gonna teach them (Wrong from right)

We're gonna help them (See the light)

And make an offer that they can't refuse.

(That the Xenos just can't refuse)

Confess, don't be boring

Say yes, don't be dull

A fact you're ignoring

It's better to lose your schlicktau than your skull (Or your gavalt)

The Inquisition (What a show)

The Inquisition (Here we go)

We know you're wishing that we'd go away

But the Inquisition's here and it's here to stay

The Inquisition (Oh boy)

The Inquisition (What joy)

The Inquisition (Oi oi)

I was posting down in /tg/, I was minding my own business

I was about to post some Loli Daemonette.

Then these Ordos Hereticus plunge in

And they throw me in a dungeon

And they shoved a revved up chainsword up my ass.

Is that considerate?

Is that polite?

And not a tube of Preparation H in sight.

I'm sittin' flickin' daemons

And I'm lookin' through the thickens

When suddenly these guys break down my walls.

I didn't even know them

And they grabbed me by the scrotum

And they started playing Ping Pong with my balls

Oh, the agony!

Ooh, the shame!

To make my privates public by a game!

The Inquisition (What a show)

The Inquisition (Here we go)

We know you're wishing that we'd go away

But the Inquisition's here and it's here to-

Hey, Eisenhorn!

What do you say?

I just got back from the autos-du-fe,

Autos-du-fe? What's the autos-du-fe?

It's what you oughtn't to do but you do anyway!

Skit scat doodlebac doodle be bay

Will you convert?

NO NO NO NO!

Will you confess?

NO NO NO NO!

Will you revert?

NO NO NO NO!

Will you say YES?

NO NO NO NO!

Now I asked in a nice way

I said pretty please

I bent their ears

Now I'll work on the knees

Hey Eisenhorn

Walk this way

We got a new game you might want to play!

Pull this handle, try your luck

Who knows, Eis, you might win a buck! (All right)

Put it in the ship.

(In the ship In the ship!)

How we doing? Any Heretics repent today?

Not a one! Nay Nay Nay!

We've flattened their fingers,

We've branded their buns.

Nothing is working!

SEND IN THE NUNS WITH GUNS

The Inquisition (What a show)

The Inquisition (Here we go)

We know you're wishing that we'd go away

So come on all you Heretics and you Xenos

We got some big news for all of yous

You'd better change your point of views today

'Cause the Inquisition's here and it's here to stay!

(bet you weren't expecting that song, either!)

==See Also==
*[[Daemonhunters]]
*[[Witch Hunters]]
*[[Spanish Inquisition|Their completely serious historical predecessors]]
*[[Alienhunters]]
*[[Zombiehunters]]
*[[Ordo Sicarius]]
*[[Ordo Chronos]]
*[[Dark Heresy]]
*[[Warhammer 40,000/Tactics/Inquisition|Tactics/Inquisition]]
*[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=isw7nLOdYXM A video showing one of the more feared inquisitors]

{{Template:Imperium}}
[[Category:Warhammer 40,000]][[Category:Imperial]][[Category:Inquisition]]

Inquisition

2016-05-27T08:15:22Z

2601:285:104:EAC0:B546:455B:1C5F:E921: /* Organization */

[[File:Inquisitorial_Symbol.png|thumb|100px|right|The official seal and symbol of the Inquisition. Variations exist.]]
<center> [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nf_Y4MbUCLY '''NOBODY EXPECTS THE IMPERIAL INQUISITION!''']
 - ''Lord Inquisitor Ximénez''</center>

''It does not follow that because the devil has been given power over someone on account of his sins, that power must come to an end on the cessation of the sin.''

-Malleus Maleficarum

Also known as the [[God-Emperor of Mankind|Emperor]]'s pet psychopaths - at least according to [[Commissar]] [[Ciaphas Cain|Cain]]. Strange how he gets away with this [[heresy]]. (It was because the Inquisitor writing it was his lover, and he was probably dead when it was published.)

MP jokes aside, the Holy Orders of the Officio Inquisitorus, or just Inquisition, are the "secret" police and internal investigators of the [[Imperium of Man]], the eponymous hunters of the alien, the mutant and the heretic. The inquisition is a semi-omnipotent organization that has authority over every other organization and watch every single life in the Imperium for the slightest signs of heresy 1984-Big Brother style. On the plus side, though, literally ANYONE can become an inquisitor if they really impress and win all their FOR THE EMPRAH rolls; really, even hab worker #343332791984. The Emperor and his guards are the only people in the Imperium beyond their jurisdiction; even the High Lords can be (and were) subject to Inquisitorial investigation. Plus they're FUCKING ASSHOLES! (Most of them, but there are a couple that are sympathetic. Key word being COUPLE.)

==History==
[[Image:Inquisitors.jpg|thumb|300px|right|Bet you weren't expecting that.]]

So when it became obvious that the Emperor's plan to starve the [[Chaos Gods]] with [[Imperial Truth|atheism]] was a failure due to the [[Horus Heresy]], the Big E ordered [[Malcador the Sigillite]] with the formation of the Inquisition. Charged with finding "men of character" to seek out the [[heresy|heretic]], the [[xenos|xeno]], the [[daemon]], and the unexpecting, the Inquisition serves as the secret protectors (or murderers) of the [[Imperium of Man]], guarding it from those who would destroy it from within, from without, and from [[Warp|beyond]].

As part of their duties, [[Inquisitor]]s have damn near unlimited power, up to and including [[Exterminatus|the destruction of worlds]]. If they have good cause, they can demand service from anyone, from lowly citizens to the [[High Lords of Terra]]. The only people officially exempt from this are the [[Adeptus Custodes]], who can legitimately say they have a more important job in guarding the Emperor on the Golden Throne. In practice, though, Inquisitors tend to at least say "please" and "thank you" when they require service from the more powerful Imperial organizations, especially [[Space Marines]], since they tend to get turfy about taking orders from any non-Space Marine save the Emprah. Those who don't tread lightly tend to get a close encounter with a [[chainsword]].

"''Innocence proves nothing.''"

Inquisitorial motto

== Organization ==

[[File:PPI.jpg|thumb|right|300px|[[Heresy]], [[chaos]], and [[xenos]]. These were the most dangerous threats to the [[Imperium]] that were foreseen, but the [[Emprah]] of Mankind suddenly foresaw something more threatening than the three: EXTRA HERESY. Thus, the Inquisition was born! Using their ultra abusive authority, the [[Ordo Malleus]], [[Ordo Hereticus|Hereticus]], and [[Ordo Xenos|Xenos]] have dedicated their lives to defending the Imperium, and killing the enemies of the Emprah!]]

The Inquisition is unique among Imperial departments in that it has no formal definition of a hierarchy or structure. However, [[Inquisitor]]s with common interests tend to band together to tackle issues too large for a single Inquisitor, and over time, these coalitions have coalesced into bodies called ''Ordos'' which specialize in handling a particular class of threat to the Imperium. Inquisitors will also form looser, smaller groups called ''conclaves'' to handle specific threats -- for example, a single [[Tyranid]] invasion, or threats pertaining to a particular planet. Conclaves usually include members of a single Ordo, but there's no rule against having multiple Ordos represented, and some Inquisitors actively form conclaves with experts in diverse fields.

There are three ''Ordos Majoris'' in the Inquisition:

*[[Daemonhunters|Ordo Malleus]] - They are guys who hunt [[daemon|daemons.]] This branch works with the [[Grey Knights]].
*[[Witch Hunters|Ordo Hereticus]] - Guys who like to hunt [[wizard|witches]], [[heresy|heretics]] and [[furry|mutants]]. This branch works with the [[Sisters of Battle]].
*And the [[Alienhunters|Ordo Xenos]] - The guys who fight aliens. All the time. This branch works with the [[Deathwatch]].

Several ''Ordos Minoris'' exist as well, although their exact number is uncertain (especially because an Ordo is only as big as the number of Inquisitors who care about its particular issue -- the factor that separates the major Ordos from the minor ones is that there are always plenty of daemons, heretics, and xenos to go around, while other threats rise and fall in prominence). The best-known (relatively speaking) are as follows:

*Ordo Aegis- They help with keeping the Cadian Gate secure.
*Ordo Astartes- They try to keep some degree of control over the [[Space Marines]], with "try" being the operative word. Some recent breakthroughs have been made with the introduction of [[Vindicare|Ork Sharpshooters]] and [[Minotaurs|dickery]].
*Ordo Astra- They keep stellar maps up to date.
*Ordo Barbarus- They watch over pre-industrial worlds to make sure Chaos cults can't spring up on them.
*[[Ordo Chronos]] - They specialize in the possibility of time travel (particularly because time in the Warp doesn't flow normally), and they sought to deal with temporal anomalies, such as a ship reaching its destination before it actually left its starting point. Unfortunately for them, they just up and vanished without a trace. Nobody knows where they went and as a result this Ordo has been essentially forgotten by the rest of the Inquisition.
*Ordo Custodum- They make sure Holy Terra stays secure and devoid of heretics.
*Ordo Desolatus- Purpose unknown. For some odd reason it only has one member.
*Ordo Excorium- They make sure nobody tries to call in an [[Exterminatus]] without having a good reason for it first. The Imperium could probably use more of them, seeing as Exterminatus seem to happen all the time for things that could probably have been resolved in other ways. They are doing their job since by official statistics, over 90% of Inquisitors who declared a single Exterminatus were stripped of their rank and declared heretics for this exact reason. But they really need to put some effort to prevent such kind of behavior. Print some guidelines or something.
*Ordo Machinum - They ensure that the [[Adeptus Mechanicus]] properly integrate STC variants (and the occasional piece of xenos tech) into Imperial technology while also trying to keep their hoarding tendencies to an acceptable level.
*Ordo Militarum - Their role is to ensure that the Imperial armed forces remain loyal. The [[Commissar]]iat is their child organization.
*Ordo Necros- Nobody's entirely sure what they do, but since they apparently needed an entire Ordo to supervise them (The Ordo Vigilus), it must be really important. Something to do with the [[Necron]]s, maybe? (Looking after the [[C'tan|Void Dragon]]?) Something to do with a nature of death and the afterlife? In any case, someone was and is really fucking worried about them and whatever the hell they're doing.
*Ordo Originatus- They act as the Inquisition's historians, attempting to sift through ten thousand years' worth of myths and legends for the few grains of truth that remain.
*Ordo Obsoletus- only mentioned in the fluff a few times, the Inquisitions official department of What The Fuck just happened here? Tends to chase up inexplicable events like the Legion of the Damned turning up. Basically the 40th millennium's X-Files. Tend to be suspicious about miracles.
*Ordo Redactus- The Inquisition's equivalent of the Ministry of Truth, which makes sure that the secrets of the Inquisition's past stay secret. Naturally, this can be quite a problem for the Ordo Originatus if the two don't work together.
*Ordo Thanatos - Unknown purpose. Considering though they are named after the Greek word for death, it points to their purpose having some relation to death, perhaps investigating means of immortality?
*Ordo Sanctorum- This branch keeps a close eye on the [[Ecclesiarchy]] so a second Reign of Blood doesn't occur.
*Ordo Scriptorum- Like a grimdark version of the NSA, they examine and investigate written records and communications and try to cut through the Administratum's red tape when doing so would keep the Imperium safe and secure. Occasionally referred to as the Ordo ISO 9000.
*Ordo Scriptus- Oversees official historical records on Terra. Since they only have 6 (Inquisitorial) members, they most likely make use of great amounts of administratum resources, and even then they are constantly and horribly out of date.
*Ordo Senatorum- Unknown purpose. Perhaps it has something to do with the [[High Lords of Terra|Senatorum Imperialis]] and their staff?
*[[Ordo Sicarius]] - They watch over the [[Officio Assassinorum]] to make sure that they don't try to repeat [[The Beheading]].
*[[Zombiehunters|Ordo Sepulturum]] - They're dedicated to fighting plagues and diseases, but mainly the Zombie Plague and the zombies that result.
*Ordo Vigilus - their purpose is to keep an eye on the Ordo Necros. Someone must have been really concerned by Necros to make an Ordo for the sole sake of keeping an eye on an Ordo.

And nice red uniforms OH DAMN.

Most of the Ordos are very straightforward, doing jobs that are necessary to keep the Imperium running and acting as checks and balances to other powerful organizations in the Imperium, making sure at least most of the various factions play nice while they're around to do important things.

(More or less how they act on /tg/ - [[Media:I.png]]

==Hierarchy==
[[Dark Heresy]] gives us a look at the inner workings of the Inquisition in how they operate and recruit people. Many of them come from nearly every other organization of the Imperium, with a few criminals and death cultists thrown in.

*Acolyte - these are the guys who get recruited (or press-ganged) into the Inquisition's service, for the long term that is. While an Inquisitor can commandeer anyone they need for a particular mission, these agents officially belong to the Inquisition and have received training for their part in the organization. Reasons for recruitment can vary between a person's skills being seen as valuable, to the person in question has seen too much but can be put to use instead of purged, or if the person in question is simply expendable. Acolytes are often servants or meatshields for inquisitors, but if a particular agent shows a high degree of resourcefulness, they may be selected for becoming an inquisitor's personal retinue.
*Throne Agent - An Inquisitor's trusted aides, they tend to be more experienced than acolytes and aid in investigations. Throne Agents who are especially talented with a history of success may be recommended to become Inquisitors themselves.
*Explicator - Apprentice Inquisitors, they train directly under an Inquisitor on how to investigate.
*Interrogator - Inquisitors in training sent out into the field. They have their own rosettes and can order people around, but still lack the authority to perform independently. Once they have enough field and leadership experience they get promoted by the approval of three Inquisitors or one Inquisitor Lord.
*Inquisitor - the full monty. These are the guys who get to root out Heresy, order Exterminatus, rope entire armies into service, and so forth.
*Inquisitor Lord - Not a rank per se, rather a title that recognizes the power and influence of an individual inquisitor. Invitation-only and requires the agreement of three existing Inquisitor Lords. They tend to be the oversees of a particular conclave.
*Master - One of, if not the Head Honcho for a sub-sector.
*Grandmaster - Like the master, but for an entire sector.
*Inquisitorial Representative - The elected representative to the [[High Lords]].

==Philosophies==

The Inquisition is a big and complicated place, and many have different philosophies on how to protect the Imperium and stop [[Chaos]]. These are defined as either Puritans or Radicals. Both are fucked up assholes.

===Puritans===
Puritans, simply put, are those who refuse to employ the measures of the enemy, such as xenotech or the Warp. Most Inquisitors start out as Puritans, but a number of them fall into Radicalism (which can be classed as lesser heresy in its most extreme forms). Puritanism can fall among three major philosophies:

*{{anchor|Amalathianism}}'''Amalathianism''': The most conservative form of Puritanism in the Inquisition, Amalathians (named after Mount Amalath, where its tenets were first set down at an Inquisitorial conclave) believe that the Emperor has some sort of divine plan for the Imperium, and the Inquisitions purpose is to protect the Imperium as that plan becomes visible. Change is considered the greatest enemy (which may have [[Tzeentch|some sense to it]]), with the exception that they seek to overcome the factionalism so common within the [[Adeptus Terra]]. The irony that the Amalathians are themselves technically a faction is not lost on them. You'd think that a group which holds the Imperium at present is perfect would be off its rocker, but they're actually a fairly reasonable group who prefer to [[/tg/ gets shit done|get shit done]] rather than bicker and bitch over territorial disputes. [[Gregor Eisenhorn]] was once a staunch Amalathian, but he eventually fell into Radicalism in his later years.
*{{anchor|Monodominant}}'''Monodominant''': The most extreme form of Puritianism in the Inquisition, Monodominants are basically [[Humanity Fuck Yeah]] taken to its illogical extreme. They believe that humanity, and ''only'' humanity, should be allowed to continue to exist. Given that the average inhabitants of the galaxy are [[Eldar|space pansies who would abandon you in a heartbeat]], [[Dark Eldar|space pansies who would torture and rape you in a heartbeat]], [[Ork|green hooligans who would fight and kill you in a heartbeat]], [[Tyranid|giant spacebugs who would eat you in a heartbeat]], [[Necron|undead robots who would atomize you in a clock tick]] and [[Chaos|things much worse]], this is [[Grimdark|an understandable worldview]]. Unfortunately, the Monodominants take things a few steps further, wanting to eliminate all [[mutant]]s, including the [[Psyker]]s ([[Astropath]]s and [[Navigator]]s) that humanity needs to keep functioning, as well even [[Space Marines]]. 
*{{anchor|Thorianism}}'''Thorianism''': The most radical form of Puritanism, Thorians are named after [[Sebastian Thor]], the hero of the [[Age of Apostasy]], and believe that Thor held part of the power of the Emperor within him. The Thorians thus believe that it is possible to reincarnate the Emperor of Mankind into a new body, allowing him to rebuild the Imperium and launch a new [[Great Crusade]]. As a result, Thorians closely study the nature of the human consciousness and the Warp, while also keeping a close eye on individuals that show enough power to be potential hosts for the Emperor's soul (such as Living Saints). They are extremely close to the [[Ecclesiarchy]]. 
**{{anchor|Anomolian Beholders}}'''Anomolian Beholders''': A conservative branch of Thorianism which takes a more passive approach to the resurrectionist ideology; they are more content with observing humanity for signs of the God-Emperor's return than actively trying to bring him back. 
**{{anchor|Ardentites}}'''Ardentites''': A variation of Thorian belief that claims the power of the Emperor was dispersed throughout humanity as a whole rather than being concentrated in any one individual. Derisively referred to as "miracle chasers" by the rest of the Inquisition for their many failed attempts at proving their beliefs.

===Radicals===

<center> "Salvation comes with a cost. Judge us not by our methods, but what we seek to accomplish."
 - '' lord inqusitor "illusive man" cerberus'' </center>
Radicals are those Inquisitors who believe in fighting fire with fire--specifically, using the weapons of the enemy against the enemy. According to [[Gideon Ravenor]], Radicalism is an inevitable product of an Inquisitor's ideology being tested, as the more one learns about the nature of the enemy, the more they realize that the enemy has a lot better toys than the Imperium. However, given that most Inquisitors will face Chaos at some point, and given the inherently corrupting nature of the Warp, Radicalism may lead to one hoping to fight the Archenemy with its own tools before brought into the service of the Chaos Gods instead; consequently, an accusation of Radicalism is only slightly less serious than an accusation of outright heresy. Radicalism can fall into a lot more branches than Puritanism, and the following is merely a list of the most common forms it can take:

*{{anchor|Horusians}}'''Horusians''': One of the most dangerous forms of radicalism, Horusians (named after [[Horus|Horus Lupercal]]) believe that power the Chaos Gods imbued Horus with to fight the Emperor can be used to create a new body for the Emperor. Mostly consists of older Inquisitors who have become angry with the other resurrection theories failing to get shit done.
*{{anchor|Istvaanism}}'''Istvaanism''': One of the most violent forms of Radicalism, Istvaanians (named for the virus-bombing of Istvaan III, which began the Horus Heresy) believe that conflict is desirable, and mankind only grows in a state of violence (while it is said that "necessity is the mother of invention", the culture in 40k minimizes technological advancements). In practice, this leads to various conflicts that would otherwise remain minor suddenly becoming unmanageable because an Istvaanite was covertly funneling resources to one or both sides. Possibly the only group in the galaxy who views the Imperium's biggest problem as too ''few'' wars.
*{{anchor|Recongregationism}}'''Recongregationism''': Radicals who believe that the Imperium has become stagnant and corrupt, and needs to be rebuilt lest it collapse further. Unfortunately for them, they aren't entirely sure about how to do this, or how it should be rebuilt after tearing down the old order. Some of the more extreme Recongregators end up like Lilean Chase, an Inquisitor who fell to Chaos and founded the Cognitae (or at least its ''40K'' incarnation), arguably these inquisitors may be the closest thing to <s>the modern views of western society</s> Inquisitors giving a crap about ordinary people, as shown in a small story one of them used a cadre of Xenos Hunters composed of Space Marines from dubious chapters ([[Black Dragons]], [[Flame Falcons]], etc) to simultaneously stop a [[Necron]] incursion and topple an oppressive planetary government with the hope something better will go out of the consecutive population uprising.
*{{anchor|Revivificationism}}'''Revivificationism''': Essentially the radical form of Thorianism, Revivificators believe in studying the effects of death and dying so that they can reverse the process and revive the Emperor of Mankind. Revivificators have a deep interest in studying the Eldar as a result, and have less ties to the Ecclesiarchy.
*{{anchor|Xanthism}}'''Xanthism''': The most overt and well known form of Radicalism, Xanthians (named after Lord Inquisitor Zaranchek Xanthus, executed for heresy in M32) believe that using Chaotic artifacts such as possessed swords and Daemonhosts are viable weapons against the Archenemy which should be used whenever possible. They hold that only by controlling the power of Chaos can Chaos be defeated. Eisenhorn eventually followed Xanthism after being forced to use Cherubael to save the lives of his retinue. (Most of the time, this ends up spectacularly backfiring when their tools rebel at the worst possible time- or worse, corrupt them into the service of Chaos. The Ruinous Powers hate each other, but they aren't always complete idiots about it, and when you play with fire, you only have to drop it once to set the whole house ablaze.)
**{{anchor|Phaenonism}}'''Phaenonism''': A splinter group of Xanthism, considered extreme even by other Radicals. Their dabbling with tech-heresy alongside the traditional Xanthite methods led them to openly deny the Emperor's divinity and embrace the powers of the Warp, seeking to rebuild the Imperium in their own image. Despite being declared Excommunicate Traitoris, there are still some Phaenonites in the Inquisition, although they have taken great caution to conceal their allegiances from their fellow Inquisitors.
*{{anchor|Libricars}}'''Libricars''': An extreme version of Amalthianism that insists that even the smallest deviations from the status quo warrants purging. Unlike the Amalthians, they will do absolutely ''anything'' to ensure the status quo. Needless to say, the Recongregators hate them.
*{{anchor|Oblationists}}'''Oblationists''': Bizarro Monodominants that insist that the truly righteous (i.e. themselves) must allow themselves to be damned through the use of the Warp, the xenos, and the unclean to keep humanity safe. At the same time they believe that anyone else using these things will be hopelessly damned and ought to be purged. The hypocrisy of this is lost on them.
*{{anchor|Ocularians}}'''Ocularians''': A minor faction obsessed with learning how to predict and divine the future, no matter the cost of doing so.
**{{anchor|Antiquarti}}'''Antiquarti''': A subgroup of Ocularians that seek to predict the future by discovering patterns within events in the past. That wouldn't be hard if anyone allowed them to see the few books on the past, since no one teaches history in the grimdark future.
*{{anchor|Polypsykana}}'''Polypsykana''': A group that believes humanity is evolving into a fully psychic race (which appears to be true) and that it is a good idea for them to do everything they can to accelerate this process (which is clearly arguable). They do this by trying to protect nascent psykers from their Puritan colleagues, though they have also been known to harbor witches and other rogue psykers as well.
*{{anchor|Seculos Attendous}}'''Seculos Attendous''': A minor faction that views the [[Ecclesiarchy]] as an obstacle to mankind's progress and seeks to weaken it wherever they can. They're probably the only group of people in the Imperium who have realized that fact. A shame that they can't agree on what to replace it with on the absurdly tiny chance they succeed.
*{{anchor|Casophilians}}'''Casophilians''': Another branch of Thorianism interested in learning how to summon a deceased soul back to the Materium in the hope that doing so could be the first step to resurrecting the Emperor. (In practice, this would probably resemble a form of "reverse daemon summoning".) Relatively conservative by Radical standards, they are one of the few factions that can be considered open to new ideas and are known to work especially well with the Anomolian Beholders.
*{{anchor|Xeno Hybris}}'''Xeno Hybris''': A small group which sees strict anti-alien policies as being counter-productive to the Imperium of Man. They feel that sometimes Xenos can be useful or be learned from, especially when working against chaos. Many inquisitors of the Ordo Malleus in particular will do this to deal with the forces of chaos every now and again, but the Xeno Hybris makes seeking said cooperation their hat. At the very least, these guys are not tempting fate to the same extent by as other Radicals since their toys are much less likely to eat their souls. Even so, this position would most likely be more popular if the aliens the Imperium deals with on a regular basis were less of a bunch of dicks themselves or consists of [[Slaugth|Humanoid Maggots]] and other horrors that not even the Tau will try to convince to join the Greater Good.

==Song==
([http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NUMkcBctE7c tune])

The eye that sleepth not.

The Inquisition (Let's begin)

The Inquisition (Look out, sin)

We have a mission

To kill all the Xenos (Xenos, Xe-e-nos)

We're gonna teach them (Wrong from right)

We're gonna help them (See the light)

And make an offer that they can't refuse.

(That the Xenos just can't refuse)

Confess, don't be boring

Say yes, don't be dull

A fact you're ignoring

It's better to lose your schlicktau than your skull (Or your gavalt)

The Inquisition (What a show)

The Inquisition (Here we go)

We know you're wishing that we'd go away

But the Inquisition's here and it's here to stay

The Inquisition (Oh boy)

The Inquisition (What joy)

The Inquisition (Oi oi)

I was posting down in /tg/, I was minding my own business

I was about to post some Loli Daemonette.

Then these Ordos Hereticus plunge in

And they throw me in a dungeon

And they shoved a revved up chainsword up my ass.

Is that considerate?

Is that polite?

And not a tube of Preparation H in sight.

I'm sittin' flickin' daemons

And I'm lookin' through the thickens

When suddenly these guys break down my walls.

I didn't even know them

And they grabbed me by the scrotum

And they started playing Ping Pong with my balls

Oh, the agony!

Ooh, the shame!

To make my privates public by a game!

The Inquisition (What a show)

The Inquisition (Here we go)

We know you're wishing that we'd go away

But the Inquisition's here and it's here to-

Hey, Eisenhorn!

What do you say?

I just got back from the autos-du-fe,

Autos-du-fe? What's the autos-du-fe?

It's what you oughtn't to do but you do anyway!

Skit scat doodlebac doodle be bay

Will you convert?

NO NO NO NO!

Will you confess?

NO NO NO NO!

Will you revert?

NO NO NO NO!

Will you say YES?

NO NO NO NO!

Now I asked in a nice way

I said pretty please

I bent their ears

Now I'll work on the knees

Hey Eisenhorn

Walk this way

We got a new game you might want to play!

Pull this handle, try your luck

Who knows, Eis, you might win a buck! (All right)

Put it in the ship.

(In the ship In the ship!)

How we doing? Any Heretics repent today?

Not a one! Nay Nay Nay!

We've flattened their fingers,

We've branded their buns.

Nothing is working!

SEND IN THE NUNS WITH GUNS

The Inquisition (What a show)

The Inquisition (Here we go)

We know you're wishing that we'd go away

So come on all you Heretics and you Xenos

We got some big news for all of yous

You'd better change your point of views today

'Cause the Inquisition's here and it's here to stay!

(bet you weren't expecting that song, either!)

==See Also==
*[[Daemonhunters]]
*[[Witch Hunters]]
*[[Spanish Inquisition|Their completely serious historical predecessors]]
*[[Alienhunters]]
*[[Zombiehunters]]
*[[Ordo Sicarius]]
*[[Ordo Chronos]]
*[[Dark Heresy]]
*[[Warhammer 40,000/Tactics/Inquisition|Tactics/Inquisition]]
*[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=isw7nLOdYXM A video showing one of the more feared inquisitors]

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[[Category:Warhammer 40,000]][[Category:Imperial]][[Category:Inquisition]]

Armageddon Steel Legion

2016-05-27T07:39:02Z

2601:285:104:EAC0:B546:455B:1C5F:E921: /* Armageddon 2: Electric Boogaloo */

[[File:IG art steel legion.jpg|300px|thumb|right|Armageddon Steel Legionnaires outside of their natural habitat of [[METAL BOXES|MEHTAL BAWKSES]].]]

Take the [[Death Korps of Krieg]], replace the doom and gloom with slightly less doom and gloom, throw them into the largest land war in modern Imperial history, and give each man his own <s>Chimera</s> [[Baneblade|BEEEIIHHHNNBLLAAAAIIDDDEE]]. What you get is the [[Armageddon]] Steel Legion, one of the most heavily mechanized Imperial Guard units in the galaxy, with a penchant for fighting [[Ork]]s. They're basically a mixed bag of the myriad forces that fought for the allies in World War Two. They wear bitchin' trench coats and gas masks, they fight Orks on a regular basis, and they have access to a metric fuckton of armored vehicles. They probably use Chimeras as condo(m)s.

Something interesting about the Steel Legion, they contain a specialized regiment for fighting in the equatorial jungles of the planet; the Armageddon Ork Hunters. Basically, they're a regiment of mini-Marbos, so good at fighting the Orks they can ''use Ork weapons''; a damn-near impossible (or stupid depending on who you ask) feat considering that most Ork weapons either fall apart or backfire when used by a non-Ork. So they're all so badass they've become Orky in their own right, or they're, in fact, all [[Deffwotch|Orks in disguise]] trolling other Orks and waiting for the opportune moment to krump the humies.

==The First War for Armageddon==
So, minor bit of history. Armageddon is pretty much a big ass factory, that on three occasions has been trashed. The first time, [[Angron]] decided it would make for a nice summer home, and decided to party for a while with a couple thousand [[Bloodletter]]s and fifty thousand [[Khorne]] [[Berserker]]s of the [[World Eaters]]. Much partying was to be had before someone called the cops with a noise complaint, and the [[Grey Knights]], [[Space Wolves]] and whoever hadn't been killed managed to take back the planet, with ninety Grey Knights dying to banish Angron.

When the party was over, the Inquisition decided to take out the trash, meaning that they forced the entire population of Armageddon into labor camps and worked them to death on suspicion of [[Heresy|HERESY]], before repopulating the planet and pissing off [[Logan Grimnar]] and his altruistic Space Wolves to no end. This escalated into a catastrophically wasteful standoff between the Inquisition and the Space Wolves that ended with the Lord Inquisitor being chopped into an idiot salad. Baba Booey.

You know whats really stupid? The Imperial Guard fights Chaos constantly, successfully, and kept from turning (most of the time) because of their faith that the Emperor would protect them. Which means, of course, that if knowledge of Chaos and the Grey Knights spread it would actually improve morale ('cus hey look, space marines wtfpwning daemons, no need to panic, the Emperor Protects). Idiots.

==Armageddon 2: Electric Boogaloo==
Jump ahead a few thousand years, and we get the real origins of the Steel Legion. Warboss [[Ghazghkull Mag Uruk Thraka]] thought that Armageddon would be a nice place for a [[WAAAGH]] and so there was a big ass fight. [[Commissar Yarrick]] led the defense of Hades Hive, holding out for months without support against a gigantic Ork offensive. This is where Yarrick first earned Ghazgull's respect; countering every attack plan the warboss had, and sending crackheads on suicidal charges into ork camps with explosives strapped to them.

With the Guardsmen stretched thin, the Blood Angels [[Mary Sue|arrived to pull their asses out of the fire]], doing what Indrick Boreale couldn't and performing a successful STEHL REIN attack. The entire company dropped into the Ork Horde and fought nonstop until the Orks fled. Ghazghkull said he'd be back, so the Guardsmen began prepping for war.

Having lost the majority of its PDF and most of the off-world regiments, all that was left was charred corpses and scorched metal. As the spess mahreen apothecaries solemnly collected their fallen brothers' gene-seed, thousands of medicae could be seen retrieving countless standard issue adamantium balls, as well as the odd pair of power balls. Manly tears were shed on both sides and the repatriation of the planets defences would begin.

==The Third War for Armageddon==
Preparing for his return, the Steel Legion became insanely fortified, with the Munitorium granting them a lessened tithe to keep local forces numerous enough to defend the planet. Millions of tanks, transports, and any other vehicle they could build were used in a gigantic buildup for the Orks return.

When they finally did, the Third War quickly escalated into the largest Ork WAAAAGH in history, drawing in dozens of Space Marine chapters, Imperial Guard regiments and even Titan Legions. After a mostly successful initial defense, the Steel Legion was slowly pushed back into heavy street fighting, turning the war from the Africa Campaign into Stalingrad, with tanks rolling off the factory floor into combat zones. The war mostly stopped, when Armageddon entered its "Season of Fire" (a major period of volcanic activity), so while the Orks managed to successfully capture almost half of hive-cities, the cities in which they were defeated became unreachable. Orks got bored, and withdrew most of their forces to space, though still a lot of them remained on Armageddon and continued to fight. Both sides declared this as their victory. Steel Legion units now use the permanent Ork infestation for training purposes, keeping them away from the remaining major hives.

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[[Category:Warhammer 40,000]][[Category:Imperial]]