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Nazi

2023-03-02T14:24:00Z

2601:41:C77F:9B60:1826:9A79:781:A034: /* Overview */

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{{sick|Fucking Nazis.}}
{{Topquote|I have in this War a burning private grudge—which would probably make me a better soldier at 49 than I was at 22: against that ruddy little ignoramus Adolf Hitler (for the odd thing about demonic inspiration and impetus is that it in no way enhances the purely intellectual stature: it chiefly affects the mere will). Ruining, perverting, misapplying, and making for ever accursed, that noble northern spirit, a supreme contribution to Europe, which I have ever loved, and tried to present in its true light.|[[J.R.R. Tolkien]], being a boss}}
{{Topquote|1=[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fHFtbSZ3KRE YOU UTTER FOOL! GERMAN SCIENCE IS THE FINEST IN ZE WORLD!!!]|2=[[JoJo's Bizarre Adventure|Stroheim, an over the top Nazi and the first Guile]]}}

[[File:Nazi.png|frameless|center]]

[[Image:Nazi uniforms.gif|thumb|right|150px|[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L21dPTqSjpQ God''damn'' it, Nazis! Why are you so fashionable, you ''evil fucking bastards''?!]]]
'''Nazi''' is the commonly used shorthand version of ''Nationalsozialistische Deutsche Arbeiterpartei'' (National Socialist German Workers' Party), a political party which took over Germany <s>for a 1,000 years</s> from 1933 to 1945. It also refers to people who belonged to said party, their ideology, and their regime in Germany during said period of time. Led by Adolf Hitler, the Nazi Party emerged from the uncertainty and political upheaval caused by the Red Scare, the end of the German Empire after the Great War, myths, promoted by the army, that the military had been on the cusp of victory before being "stabbed in the back" by the civil government, resentment at unfair conditions imposed by the Treaty of Versailles, economic uncertainties due to the stock market crash of 1929, German ethnic nationalism, a desire to blame things on scapegoats, and a belief in militarism popular among many returning veterans. They were also aided by their invention of modern campaigning and propaganda, wide-spread dissatisfaction with the status quo, the strategic seizure of the political positions that controlled the police force, the intimidation or murder of political opponents and journalists using glorified street thugs, and more dumb luck than anyone has any right to have, let alone a bunch of genocidal [[Racial Holy War|loons]].

==Overview==
[[File:German_Bratwurst.gif|right|thumb|Historically Accurate (if you consider checzia polish)]]
The Nazis' initial success can be attributed to the image of glorious economic recovery, part of which they accomplished by keeping Germany's economy running during the Great Depression. They presented this to the rest of the world, making many people believe the little mustachioed guy couldn't be that crazy since he'd made his country recover brilliantly in very little time. And while Germany did indeed recover, the whole thing was helped and held upright by [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mefo_bills MEFO bills]: basically a Ponzi scheme that allowed the government to loan money on the sly through a front company about metallurgy research (the ''Metallurgische Forschungsgesellschaft'', or MEFO in short). This allowed them to work at a much higher level of debt flotation than allowed by international regulation, and the idea was to pay back the loans with seized gold and valuables from Jews at first, and then directly from conquered nations after the war, since even [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Government_bond state created debt bonds] are exactly that: debt, credit, which is trust. Eventually the creditor will want something in exchange (or at the very least get his investment back) or the debtor's credibility will be shattered, stopping the money flow.

To give you a clearer idea of what happened: You are defeated and poor, but are fuming for revenge. To keep you down, your victorious neighbors don't lend you a dime to produce guns and make sure your already meager income is only spent on debt and basic necessities. So what do you do? You decide to spend money in the form of credit, raise the debt higher and higher (making the rest of the world believe you are rich), and keep the charade until the debt becomes irrelevant (who needs to pay the creditor he will declare war on?). So you make up a credit card called Mefocard ("MEtallurgische FOrschungsgesellschaft" - Metallurgy R&D sounds civilian and peaceful, so the world markets play along), borrow even more wildly to look opulent, and to create weapons on the sly promise that you'll pay the debt back... Then attempt to kill the lenders and subjugate their families to share the debt you have. It was simply a continent wide, all-or-nothing robbery attempt even wilder than WW1's trench-fighting Imperial duel.

The Ponzi schemes weren't limited to national/corporate level shenanigans, but extended to the German people as well. The famous Beetle was developed to be a cheap family car (hence “volkswagen”, or “people’s car”), and a part of selling the German public on the idea of an idyllic, cheap-and-cheerful family life, along with things like state-sponsored vacation villages. An elaborate layaway scheme allowed average German families to give the government a few Reichsmark a day in exchange for the promise of a new Beetle and a seaside vacation package. However, all that money actually went into rebuilding the German military, and war began before any of the promises had to be delivered on. Because the [[Tzeentch|illusion of a better future and hope is always easier]] than just taxing the population directly. And, lastly, the Holocaust itself was also an important pillar of the German economy, especially when the war started in earnest. Jewish (and other undesirables', particularly Slavic intelligentsia) property and land was being confiscated on a scale never before seen or even conceived of. Not even their dead bodies were safe: glasses were taken apart and reused for scopes or similar, hair was used as fabrics for the textile industry, and gold teeth were taken and melted down by the millions. Massive amounts of gold, hard currency and other valuable things like works of art were stolen from Jewish museums, synagogues, households and bank accounts (hence keeping up the Mefo bill's token payments to creditors). They even had to pay for their own transit into the death camps, which would almost be hilarious if it wasn't so unbelievably evil. This ruthless, industrialized way of executing a massive genocide made the Holocaust the standard many people associate the word "genocide" with today - ironically, the Holocaust was in its methods the exception. No other genocide in history built an entire branch of government and industry centered around the mass murder of human beings, not to mention devoting vital manpower and military resources bullets to the project that the overstretched front lines of Germany desperately needed; in essence, [[Fail|the Nazis sabotaged their own war machine, just to kill Jews.]]

They were also fantastic proponents of lies and propaganda, ranging from bogus race theory (fake archaeology was a particular favorite), to manufactured pretexts for war (the trigger for invading Poland was an obvious false-flag operation- something Japan had used 2 years previously), to simply overstating their successes. For example, the old line that goes "say what you want about them, but the Nazis/Hitler did make the trains run on time"? They didn't. Train service was as bad or worse under fascist leadership as it had been immediately before their rise to power. But they realized that they only had to ''say'' the trains were running on time, and strongarm anyone inside Germany who dared to publicly disagree. Doubly funny is that it was ''Mussolini'''s Italy that had trains running on time, and even then, it was because of pre-fascism era personnel improving it. In fact, the entire political/industrial structure of Nazi Germany was a nightmarish tangle of private businesses, government organizations, bureaucrats, and ambitious officials with overlapping portfolios and responsibilities. Hitler frequently gave out contradictory orders and deliberately pitted his subordinates against each other as part of his social Darwinist beliefs; the strongest and best would naturally rise to the top through competition while the others were weeded out, thus improving the whole. In practice, this system was dysfunctional, inefficient, unresponsive, wasteful, and full of more backstabbing bastardry than an average game of [[Diplomacy]]. People became too scared to make decisions without Hitler around, companies and factories wasted precious time and materials on design contracts that were ultimately awarded to other firms, there was an ongoing multi-way fight between the army, Kriegsmarine, Luftwaffe, and Waffen-SS for resources, manpower, and money throughout the war, and people like Himmler and Goering carved out their own private spheres of influence in the middle of it all, further splintering the government.

Needless to say, this situation was the reason why the scenario of not waging war (like in Hearts of Iron or some alternate reality stories) simply wasn't a realistic option. Despite their multiple annexations of territory, the Nazis couldn't sustain their charade without the influx of riches, heavy machinery (they stripped Poland, Czechoslovakia, and other conquered territories to the bone, grabbing civilian factories' machinery, bolts, nuts and even the metallic building materials like [[Blood Ravens]] on meth, literally, Nazis loved their amphetamines) and material from other conquered territories to pay the MEFO bills. So they soon mobilized their armies and launched a war of expansion on the rest of the world, starting with Poland. (The question is still open among historians as whether they annexed and plundered enough reserves with Czechoslovakia to keep the charade up "peacefully" long enough to let their Red "ally" make the opening move instead, but that's a discussion for another place and time.)

Their goal (next to getting gold and industrial materials to pay the enormous gambling debt of an empire) was to impose their militaristic Social Darwinist ideology across Europe, outlaw any dissenting school of thought, enslave all the "sub-human" Slavs (after starving to death more than half of them to make room for German settlers in accordance to Generalplan Ost and assimilating anyone believed to be sufficiently Germanic), and exterminate any "undesirables" (Jews, Roma, homosexuals, etc) on which they blamed all their problems because they felt that they were superhumans without any flaws. Any problem which they suffered had to be the fault of some subversive "other" from outside who tried to cause the Master Race misery according to the Nazi philosophy of believing all ethnicities are a hivemind loyal to themselves and they all collectively fight over resources, therefore "weaker" races resort to social corruption (LGBT, porn, discouraging women from reproducing) of the glorious German master race to get ahead of them. But due to some severe strategic fuck ups from Hitler <s>who often overruled his military leadership</s> and his generals (the situation is more nuanced than that and would be too long and boring to explain fully; basically there was mutual mistrust and both sides routinely fucked up, but after the war the generals used Hitler as a scapegoat because the history is written by the living), Germany ended up in a three-way war with the Soviet Union (who provided blood), Great Britain (military intelligence, enough naval force projection to strangle all Axis naval trade and pure fucking grit) & the United States (more armaments than you can possibly dream of with an extra helping on top), while their allies such as Romania (the dudes with the European oil fields), Hungary (some light tanks and cavalry) & Italy (...more of a liability than bonus, so...) surrendered during the middle years of the war, Finland was doing their own thing the entire time and barely gave a shit about the Nazis beyond asking for supplies, and resource-starved Japan could do little more than be a distraction.

While Germany may have had some areas of technological/industrial advantage (at least initially, and this is often overstated), by the end of the war they were crippled by a lack of many strategic resources and widespread destruction of production lines and reverted to some crude and/or untested/outlandish solutions like using coal liquefaction as an oil substitute, potato alcohol for V-2 rockets and meth-filled chocolate bars for Eastern Front troopers (when they decided to use the logistic volume for ammo rather than thick clothes which they '''had''' but decided to workaround with untested drugs-typical Hitlerite solution-). Their situation was made worse by their late-war obsession with Wunderwaffen ("wonder weapons"), such as "flying wing" aircraft, the world's first ballistic missiles, multi-charge megacannons and retardedly big tanks, all of which wasted time, materials, and engineering effort that could have instead been used to churn out more regular tanks, artillery pieces, and aircraft, along with a chronic shortage of oil other than a trickle from Romania, which meant that the panzer divisions were routinely grinding to a halt for lack of fuel by the end. Because of all this, there was no hope of repulsing both the Western Allies and the Soviet Union at the same time; thus the Nazi regime finally met its end when the Russians marched into Berlin and Hitler {{*BLAM*}}med himself along with his mad-as-a-hatter common-law wife. While their hate-wagon managed to go far and temporarily overrun most of Europe, it simply had too much war to fight on multiple fronts, a lack of effective strategic planning in the form of Hitler and his cronies, and the fact that most powerful nations of the time opposed them either because they cherished their political freedoms, saw their economies fail, or simply were on the Nazi "to-exterminate" list.

So with all that baggage, how the hell did they manage to conquer most of Europe?

Two words: operational flexibility. Or "knockout artistry", whichever you prefer. In the early half of the war, the German military operated on a principle they called "mission tactics" (auftragstaktik) or "selbstandigkeit der Unterfuhrer" (independence of the subordinate commander). The field commanders were given clear overall goals (such as: secure this location by such and such time), and then given free rein in HOW they accomplished the goal. Left to their own devices, the German commanders in the field were creative and flexible, using everything they had at their disposal and making high risk, high reward maneuvers. They also entered the war with radios in every tank and the best close air support in the world (at the time). They also had a tactical/strategic philosophy called "Bewegungskrieg" (war of movement) that emphasized mobile operations and front-loaded shock assaults and sought to avoid getting stuck into prolonged fights, since they knew from experience that they couldn't win a "Stellungskrieg", a static war of positional fighting like WWI had been. This paid off brilliantly at first, since they blew through Poland, Belgium, France, Denmark, Norway, the Netherlands, the Balkans, Greece, and the British army (twice) without much trouble.

The French and British had stronger tanks, excellent defensive positions, and equivalent numbers, but it didn't matter. The Allies were expecting a war where both sides show up and shoot at each other, while the Germans had worked out that moving fast, surrounding the enemy, and smashing them from all sides was much easier and less costly than the kind of slow, grinding warfare that had bled them dry in WWI. One French general famously spent several days celebrating his promotion to the role of leading the defense, only to finally arrive at his command center and find the Germans one river away from Paris.

The German army did its best work when their commanders were allowed to make the most out of their situation and assets, and only started to suffer when they were micromanaged and squandered in operations that didn't play to their advantages in mobility (even Sun Tzu 2,500 years ago advised against armchair micromanagement and to let field commanders make decisions for themselves). Ironically, their primary enemy, the Soviets, experienced the opposite, going from a crippled military hampered by commissars being suspicious of the officers and meddling with everything due to undeserved authority bestowed by Stalin to Stalin learning to take a backseat and being content with focusing on allocating resources for the better military minds make use of as they saw fit, while he collected the lion's share of the credit like a master politician. This is really only partially true, however.

The problem was that the German generals of the period had inherited the traditional Prussian mindset of "when all else fails, just attack the fuckers" and "proper logistical planning is for pansies and Frenchmen". Also, for all its celebrated flexibility, ''auftragstaktik'' also meant that there wasn't much in the way of backup planning, since orders were supposed to be short, simple, and delivered verbally whenever possible, rather than being written down. In turn, this meant that when things inevitably went off the rails, the officers on the scene had to improvise, and not always with good results. For example, Erwin Rommel was basically allowed to do his own thing in Africa because the rest of the German high command was busy trying to stem the bleeding in Russia. While he had some successes early on, he outran his supply lines so often that he had to steal from the British to keep his troops fed and vehicles gassed up. This worked until the Brits got their shit together and kicked his ass at El Alamein. In the aftermath, he had to abandon many of his vehicles for lack of fuel and then made a series of bad decisions that got his army smashed into a bloody mess before being taken prisoner en masse. This same mindset led other German generals to do shit like feed division after division into the urban nightmare that was Stalingrad and beat their heads against the wall in the Caucasus while their overworked and poorly structured logistics pipeline struggled just to keep the troops fed and armed, let alone adequately replace losses in men and vehicles. Hitler and his dumbshittery didn't help any, to be sure, but the German army had exactly one tool in their box and didn't stop using it even when it was patently no longer working.

==Neo Nazis==
Despite everything there are still some people out there which subscribe to the Nazi worldview, or at least something which has a lot of it in it's DNA. Yes, there is often some differences between these guys and the Nazi Party of old as well as differences between groups but this is only to be expected. There is no overarching body attempting to enforce a party discipline among Neo-Nazi groups and many people apply it to their context with local leaders putting their own spin on things.

Why do people end up here? Well there were some Nazis which did not give up on the cause even after the Third Reich went down and these guys were still an issue in Germany even after Nazism was formally banned (see the Socialist Reich Party in 1949-52, German Reich Party in 50-66 and a few more "no we are totally not Nazis even though Hitler had some good ideas..." far-right german parties). There are also a few people which by their own are pushed towards Nazism, often with similar fears. The McCarthy era Red Scare produced a number of American Neo-Nazis as a byproduct. Even so, most get led into established groups.

One source of recruits for neo-nazis has been edgelords which get off offending society and can't tell the difference between yelling "Fart Butt!" at a school assembly and "Sieg Heil!" at a Jewish Wedding. In of itself that does not mean one is actually a Nazi, but legit Nazis can hide among these jerks and try to funnel people towards them. Usually they find success with people in that category who are dealing with a lot of emotional issues and have some fears and lead them that way, usually step by step with different levels of radicalization and a spoon feeding of ideology.

To outline one path people have fallen down, it starts with things like "the allies were not pure saints"1 or "those uniforms were cool". Points which are, in of themselves, not wrong. But in the specific context that are used by can be used to bridge other dodgier talking points ("victor's history", "you're not getting the whole story") especially those that make the Nazis look better ("Rommel and Manstein was the Great Generals of the War", "1 Tiger Beats 5 Shermans") and the Allies look worse ("Russians only won through human waves", "Dresden Bombings were needlessly cruel"). If they find someone which can accepts these claims, other less savoury points and active white-washing ("The Cruel Treaty of Versailles") can be added to the mix. Add in some "Jokes" which get more and more hateful, Rinse and repeat. Of course, not everyone will fall for it and even if someone falls for the first round there is a difference between buying into some Wehraboo BS and going full Goebbels. But some get drawn deeper and deeper until they end up unironically believing the whole steaming nazi load. The fact that as people go deeper down the rabbit hole they end up alienating themselves from friends and family more and more aids the process.

1 ''Definitely true, even leaving aside Stalin. See the Bengal Famine of 1943, Japanese Internment and the Tuskegee Syphilis Study for stuff done by the UK and US. Even so, these pale in comparison to the atrocities committed by the Nazis or those they had planned.''

==Nazi Portrayals in Fiction==

Nazis are portrayed as an over the top wacky military who like leading extermination wars against the Jews (and other people) and build secret bases on the moon, under water, or some other silly place. Their technology is frequently exaggerated with [[Dieselpunk|laser weapons, armored suits, giant robots, walking tanks, and/or Robo-Hitler]]. Some vidya portrayals even goes so far as to put it all together in a big ball of [[LOLWUT]] and add a touch of magical [[Lovecraft]]ian shit because Nazi propaganda had a weird love for the occult.

Varying opinions on the perceived Nazi character allows them to be looked at from varying points of view, developing their character all the more. Take the [[Imperium of Man]], for example, which tends to blend German-fascist iconography with Soviet politics and a Roman-Catholic aesthetic sense. Some will say that the Imperium's a nuthouse since they're willing to allow an Inquisitor to turn an entire hive spire into a towering inferno if he so happens to find a single heretic in{{*BLAM*}} {{BLAM|SPEAKING ILL OF THE IMPERIUM IS EXTRA HERESY.}}

Others will say that the Imperium's just being pragmatic, and such an action is justifiable as the Imperium is constantly beset by merciless foes who will not think twice to bring them down, making their methods for survival cruel but necessary. Which, given the fact that daemons really do exist and can corrupt entire planets in a short amount of time and rape every corrupted soul forever and ever, is pretty justifiable. Even the Imperium's xenophobia is justifiable given how nearly [[Orks|all]] the [[Necrons|major]] [[Tyranids|races]] pretty much want to wipe everyone else out or [[Dark Eldar|enslave them to be tortured to death as sustenance]].

But that doesn't change the fact that these reasons are often just used as an excuse to torture and kill anyone who's even s{{BLAM}}

The idea of Nazi Germany being an advanced, sophisticated war machine has been heavily reevaluated in recent years to the point where it's now viewed as propagandistic bullshit. Closer examination of the war has shown that while advanced tactics and technology were used, the actual moment by moment commanding (WITH exceptions of course) wasn't especially fantastic, but relied on one-trick, all or nothing ponies like demoralizing the target country into surrender; it's one thing to knock out France on the brink of communist civil war or run roughshod over small, unprepared countries like Poland or Denmark and another entirely to conquer a country the size of Russia. Plus the same issue of logistics that ended up as the Wehrmacht's undoing during the Russian campaign had been happening since day one. The Third Reich had just assumed that once the Russians were beaten back to the Arkhangelsk-Astrakhan line they'd roll over and collapse, emphasis on THINKING, PRESUMING which should spell "Doom" by day one. It just wasn't readily apparent previously because all their campaigns up to that point were over fast enough that their lack of a well-organized logistical structure and reliance on front-loaded shock-and-awe assaults hadn't been a huge problem. We're talking about an army that refused to upgrade their paratroopers with steerable parachutes (which is WAY more important for a paratrooper then you would think)! Plus one can't ignore the fact most countries successfully invaded were either very minor powers or horribly horribly mismanaged or technologically stunted as far as the military was concerned. The view of the Wehrmacht as a mechanized force has also been dismantled in recent years. The popular image of the German military as a mechanized juggernaut was fostered by those same biographies mentioned above and below and by the cottage industry of writers, wargamers, and filmmakers who took those men at their word. Only about 20% of the German army was mechanized, mostly its elite divisions, and even they had lost most or all of their tanks and transports by the end of the war; by 1945 it wasn't uncommon for a so-called panzer division to contain few, if any, actual panzers. The majority of the army that invaded the USSR during Operation Barbarossa walked in, and their supplies and artillery pieces were pulled by horses. They didn't have anything like the insane levels of mechanization found in some of their enemies. Even the USSR, with American aid at first, and panic-driven manufacturing later, started outproducing the Wehrmacht around '43 in terms of supply trucks and troop transports.

This view of Germany as this massive intimidating force was mostly put in place by the biographies written by the German generals (Maybe you've heard of this before. "If Hitler just listened to his generals...") and the fact that perpetuating the myths benefited both Germany and the Western Allies. Germany got to feel like the war was a fair fight and all its failings could be blamed on that funny Austrian guy, in no small part due to Nazi officials wanting to clear their names after the war. Many of these men continued to work in the West German government way into the 60s and 70s, with one of them, Kurt Georg Kiesinger, even rising to the office of Chancellor in 1966. The British, meanwhile, got to feel better about the fact that the Wehrmacht had booted them out of France and Greece and nearly did the same in Africa, while America got to feel like the heroes who'd swept in to give those danged Natzees a righteous ass-kicking. And that's just the civilian side. The first generation of generals for the Bundeswehr were exclusively recruited from Wehrmacht and SS officers, many of them war criminals who'd done time in prison after the war, while the Allies just looked the other way because they thought they were assets, while America and Britain convinced the public that Germany could be a impressive threat. Even against a certain group of communists over the border...

===Impact on Fantasy===

In terms of military personnel, the Germans had hands down one of the best armies of the time, highly disciplined and well-trained with experienced mid-level officers and NCOs; this combined with borderline insane levels of morale at the start of the war due to years of giving the middle finger to the war-weary western nations which capitulated to their demands combined with revanchism from WW1, turned Germany into an unholy juggernaut. The Germans were known to have some of the best tanks in the war, the best darn LMG of the war, and somewhat pioneered several advanced technologies during their time. They also had the inheritance of the Prussian military tradition of relentless aggression and independence in the field. Tactics-wise, their eagerness to experiment with encirclement and mobile warfare while the Allies initially stagnated in Great War formations of firing lines gave them an incredible headstart and utterly broke the back of the French and British armies, shocking the whole world. Even Hitler expected a million Germans to die in the French war, yet France capitulated in weeks and the Germans lost at most 45,000 men KIA in the entire campaign, whereas they'd have lost that many in the last war just trying to take a random village along the Somme.

This, combined with their infamous cruelty have spawned the Nazi-esque villain template where the villains are both powerful and [[Eldrad|gigantic dicks]] to everyone else, making them completely despicable. This is because if the villain is significantly weaker than the protagonist of the setting, most people will still feel a few grains of sympathy towards the former or make them a laughing stock. But, when you make the villain both an enormous asshole and just as or more powerful than the protagonist, all bets are off and he's fair game.

Of course, the weaknesses of Nazism also need to be taken into account, in that a lot of their supposedly superior technology turned out to be highly unstable or otherwise impractical (such as behemoth tank designs that wasted time and resources that would have been better spent on dozens of more reasonable tanks), and would frequently be outclassed and definitely outnumbered by Allied designs once the latter got their shit together. This was even true at the start of the war: British Matilda IIs were all but immune to German tank fire (from the early Panzers, before the later Tigers), and a column of them almost stopped Rommel at the Battle of Arras. Add poorly managed industry and the fact that supplies at times were delivered by horse (which was not actually that atypical, since only America and early war Britain were that ridiculously mechanized), and you have a faction that is the epitome of [[Chaos Space Marines|style over substance]]. This really bit them in the ass later when the Allies, [[Imperial Guard|focusing on production and strategy over science fiction and "tactics"]], managed to get a leg up on the Third Reich, and battle-hardened Allied soldiers became the top dogs without question. To illustrate, by 1945 the typical American ''infantry'' division could expect to have as many tanks as a Nazi ''armored'' division, and an American armored division could simply zerg-rush their Nazi counterpart (and hell, the Panzer divisions frequently operated at less than half strength, even since the beginning of Barbarossa, let alone after having the country incinerated by firebombing and supply lines fucked by pissed off partisans who understandably did not want to leave the mass murder unanswered).

In fiction, expect the Nazi villains to eventually have their technology and logistics outclassed (FPS and RTS games like Call of Duty, Warfront: Turning Point or Company of Heroes), made irrelevant via gimmicks (Sniper Elite, Commandos, Velvet Assassin) or at least stolen and turned against them (Wolfenstein), and the hardened heroes to turn Nazi soldiers into cannon fodder.

Nazis are the progenitors of all acceptable targets where human bad guys are concerned. Be it in vidya games or movies, nobody has a problem with Nazis getting gunned down by the hundreds by the heroes, and they don't even have to resort to the dehumanizing full helmets that most other villain goons have to wear to make slaughtering them okay.

A more comedic take on Nazis in fiction owes to wartime cartoons, where the soldiers and Nazi command are all bumbling idiots, with comedy brought to you by Walt Disney and Warner Bros. Hitler today has essentially been turned into a punchline with all the gags centered around him, which is kinda awesome when you think about it, as dictators that wish to be feared would never want to be remembered as a joke, just watch any Downfall movie parody (Bruno Ganz's excellent performance in particular has become memetic for having Hitler rant about random things or meta rants about how he was reduced to a joke). The one exception would be Göring, who'd been a morphine addict since the Beer Hall Putsch and was so narcissistic that he thought people making jokes about him sitting on his belly for dinner and taking baths in admirals' uniforms were signs of popularity. Every other high level Nazi, especially Himmler (a failed chicken farmer who spent his last-resort field command in 1944 sleeping until noon, eating, drinking, jacking off and getting massages from a man in a special train) and Goebbels (who basically created all the modern populist tactics of dictators and was born crippled on account of a deformed leg, making him the most obviously hypocritical big name Nazi), took jokes at their expense only slightly better than Hitler did. So joke away and spit on the memory of the fools who bled the world dry.

===Examples===
*The [[Skaven]] from [[Warhammer Fantasy]] and later [[Age of Sigmar]] borrow many Nazi-esque elements, which in turn makes them the most vile and evil race in the World That Was... Only it's taken to its logical extreme, as with many things Warhammer. Nazis had a hatred for what they believed was untermenschen and believed the "Aryan" race was most pure, while the Skaven hate all other living things, including their own race, with each individual believing only themselves to be worth anything. Pack in some advanced Wunderwaffen, magical nuclear power in the form of Warpstone and chemical weapons as well and you have a solid, if over-the-top, Nazi fantasy faction.

*The [[Imperium]], to the point where they're commonly described as "Catholic '''Space-Nazis'''". Complete with gratuitous use of Nazi imagery, a doctine of racial purity and absolute hatred for the "untermenschen" (mutants, psykers, and xenos), rising to power as part of a miraculous socio-economic recovery in the wake of a catastrophe ([[Age of Strife]]/[[Great Crusade]]), a "glorious rebirth" myth harkening back to a lost golden age [[Dark Age of Technology]], numerous military structures with parallel chains of command that are all at each other's throat due to a culture-wide policy of social Darwinism, an army run by absolute fanatics with horrendously inefficient war machines they barely understand, an SS analogue in the form of the [[Adepta Sororitas]] (who coincidentally tend to be depicted as fair-haired, though skin color varies and not all orders dye their hair white). Not to mention the Imperium's justification for xenocide is almost word-for-word the [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stab-in-the-back_myth| stab-in-the-back-myth] the Nazis used to try and justify their treatment of Jews and the Holocaust, only replace "Aryan" with "human" and "Jew" with "xenos".

*The Thalmor from Skyrim are a fantasy equivalent of the NSDAP, with robes that look like SS uniforms, racism, genocide of "impure elves" and religious persecution of an enemy people in a conquered realm.

*The most extensive take on the theme of Space Nazis would be the Helghast from ''Killzone'', where the people of Helgan see the ISA as Imperialist gits who forced them out of their planet for refusing their rule. Although by Shadow Fall, they become akin to Communist East Germans, being filled with political radicals and separated by a wall and all.

*If you have a fantasy/sci-fi world, it will almost certainly have some sort of Nazi analogue floating around. At the same time, Nazis also figure into a lot of [[Alternate History|alternate history]] fiction: Nazis invading England, Nazis invading America, Nazis successfully conquering the USSR, Nazis getting the Bomb first, Nazis creating an army of mutant uber-troopers, Nazis on the Moon, Nazis using occult powers to summon demons to aid them, Nazi zombies, all of these have been done. The Nazi obsession in alternate history is largely due to the fact that we consider them evil (for the right reasons), and our modern world is the result of an Allied victory. A Nazi victory would have been an mitigated disaster. That said, most people know the history of Nazi Germany in the broad strokes and can work out some of what that would mean. You might make an interesting story about a world where (for example) Toyotomi Hideyoshi conquered Korea, but most people in North America don't know a whole lot about the Imjin War or late 16th century East-Asia.

==Nazis and [[/tg/]]==
Long ago, /tg/ realized something that most competent GMs have: Nazis represent a great liberating force for any GM, for they represent a force that any player need not feel any remorse over resorting to violence against, because Nazis are the textbook template for villains in most settings. They desire world domination, see themselves as the apex species and view most others with utter contempt, wanton disregard for common life, have an industry primarily geared towards war, are the most powerful warmongers, and they have that evil-yet-sublime aesthetic to their armies. Nazis are a modern setting variant of using [[slavery|slavers]] as your enemy in a fantasy game: they have little to no redeeming values, so they're great enemy fodder.

The association gives the players a motivation and creates the understanding that these people are Completely Evil™, allowing the GM to focus on other aspects of the story. Indeed, one can get similar results by simply providing details that lead us to conclude that any group you are facing off against are this universe's version of Nazis. That said, that same context makes using Nazis a double-edged sword, and a lazy GM (or author, script writer, or whatever; this is hardly unique to roleplaying) can royally screw up if one uses them incorrectly. Used incorrectly, Nazis become a kitten-eating one-dimensional caricature of villains descended into self-parody, which ''can'' work if the world is built for it. Kitten-eating Nazis work best in "goofy" settings where it's fully possible, and indeed expected for the final boss to be Hitler himself riding a cyborg dinosaur, but in a setting trying to take itself seriously, such flat villains do just that - fall flat and fail to incite the proper emotional reaction. Remember that the '''key''' to successful Nazi use is that emotional reaction. That exportation of real world baggage is the point, perhaps the sole point to use Nazis over some other villain. Nazis have the additional problem of not even needing to be exaggerated that much to make the worst of them into something like this. So care must be taken when one plays the Nazi card, or it will come off as trite.

Entire stretches of [[d20 Modern|d20 Past]] are shown various ways to implement ''Indiana Jones''-style Nazis into any campaign during the early 1900s, and [[Savage Worlds]] has an entire supplement devoted to thwarting Nazi super-soldier plans during WWII. More clever GMs can do even more interesting things with it, such as backing up the savagery of the Nazis with [[Fist of the North Star|a humanizing element to make them more understandable, even if antagonists]], whilst another interesting setting, proposed for [[GURPS]], starts the players off ''as'' Nazis and has them turn against their former comrades as the movement becomes harder and harder to justify. It's also worth remembering that Nazis can be used for comedy as well; they ''ARE'' Germans after all, and when they're not conquering the world they're prancing around in lederhosen, drinking beer from steins and boots, and churning out hardcore bdsm pornography. All of these lead to some pretty great storytelling, just so long as the GM knows how to play them correctly and prevent them from becoming a wackier version of an [[Ork]].

...And then you have [[Racial Holy War|this bullshit]], which misses the point entirely and renders us all stupider for the knowledge of its existence.

==Nazi Gear, Weapons, and Vehicles==
If you decide to use Nazis as your bad guys at tonight's game, the link below is a brief run down of basic information on Nazi equipment. If you're planning to play them as protagonists, either make sure it's either just a historically neutral such as a combat oriented Axis and Allies game, or [[JoJo's Bizarre Adventure|well written with an enemy that rivals or]] [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Domination ''surpasses'' their evil], or you're likely playing [[Racial Holy War]] and should thoroughly reconsider your life choices.

''Main Article: [[Nazi Equipment]]''

== See Also ==
* [[/pol/]]: Having fanatical adherents who would ironically be the first to be exterminated for being physically frail weebs or obese neckbeards.
** [[SJW]]: /pol/s almost exact opposite in theory, some SJWs frequently accuse their opponents of being secret Nazis. We couldn't possibly comment.
* [[Communism]], which Nazism so heavily opposed that some of the features of the Nazi regime cannot be explained except by its complete opposition to, or imitation of, the Soviet Union or Marxism-Leninism. 
* [[Fascist Italy]], Diet Nazi Germany.
* The [[Skaven]], who play straight some of the Nazi tropes like the concept of the Master Race and seeing all the other races as inferior "things".
* The [[Imperium of Man]], which despite what most people think is not Fascist, barring planets ruled by [[Ecclesiarchy|shitheads]]. This does not stop Neo-Nazis from fawning over it, which just shows how little they know of their own ideology, Imperium, or the fact Imperium is supposed to be evil (if the lesser one) and not something to aspire for. Neo-Nazis will try to co-opt anything which could, out of context, be spun as pro-nazi.

[[Category:History]][[Category:Not related]][[Category:Pure Evil]]

FATAL

2023-03-02T14:21:26Z

2601:41:C77F:9B60:1826:9A79:781:A034: /* Mechanics */

{{Fail}}
{{Template:Heresy}}
{{/d/}}
{{sick|Source of the [[Anal Circumference]] meme, and tons of other gross stuff.}}
[[Image:FakeFATALlogo.gif|center]]
[[Image:Fatal cover.jpg|300px|thumb|right|The cover of the "sanitized" edition]]
''Were you looking for [[FATAL_card_game|F.A.T.A.L. the card game]]? Please tell us you were looking for the card game.

{{Topquote|So basically, FATAL is the date rape RPG.|Darren MacLennan in his and Jason Sartin's infamous review}}

{{Topquote|Another faulty conclusion by Darren. '''Where is dating included?'''|Byron Hall, proving everyone right}}

A copy of '''Fantasy Adventure to Adult Lechery''' is what would pop out of [[Slaanesh]] if she raped [[Tzeentch]] while using a bong as a condom. It is, in theory, an [[RPG]] that lets [[neckbeards]] live out their rape fantasies. The gaming community has more or less unanimously come to the conclusion that FATAL (aka "The Date Rape RPG... without the dating") is simply the worst RPG ever conceived... at least, those that haven't encountered [[Racial Holy War|RaHoWa]], but then, that game is much less well known, so much the better for us, and in comparison there have been actual documented attempts to actually play FATAL, amazingly enough. Probably never in earnest, though, perhaps even by its bonemongeringly unhinged authors.

F.A.T.A.L. is, truly, a blasphemous merger of [[METAL]] and [[FAIL]]. And of [[John Norman]].

The rulebook (written by one [[Byron Hall]] and a few of his friends, who go by nicknames such as [[Edgy|"Torturon", "Burnout", and "Satan"]]) is as terribly mechanically written as it is obsessed with bizarre sexual perversions that make [[/d/]] seem prudish by comparison. It is filled with enough pointless random charts and obscure rules to deter even a veteran [[/d/M]] who has played ''[[Rolemaster]]'' for years. Quadratic equations are a requirement of most game mechanics. The [[Anal circumference]] table [[meme]] originates with FATAL. The game was apparently revised and given a new name for the acronym; '''From Another Time, Another Land''' makes minor changes to the text (read: removes the racist magical armor) but is still an abortion of gaming.

The FATAL Games website is now thankfully defunct. The current page is your average parked domain crap. However, some [[fags of 4chan|fine gentlemen]] at the Wayback Machine have archived it in all its [[FAIL|neon-on-black-plastered-with-animated-gifs glory]]. [http://web.archive.org/web/20030205182630/www.fatalgames.com/fatal.html Enter at your own risk.]

It sparked a "review" by MacLennan & Sartin, which was really more of a profanity-laden rant (admittedly a common reaction to the game), and this "review" in turn provoked a "rebuttal" from the game's creators. Reading the exchange between the two is almost guaranteed to cause brain damage. To sum it up, the "reviewers" spent most of their time talking about the various kinds of torture that would be preferable to playing the game, and the various kinds of torture they'd like to inflict on its creators, and how mentally ill and/or socially awkward they imagine its creators must be, and so on, though legitimate criticisms were also made which anyone could say would justify their invective (see "mechanics" section below. Or don't, if you'd rather preserve your last shriveled speck of faith in humanity).

The game's creators, not to be outdone, turned their ability to totally miss the point on full blast and showed the world a level of detail-obsessed pedantry that had been previously considered impossible. Their counterarguments included: "Facial Charisma is not how good you look. It’s how good ''your face'' looks", "I believe what Sartin is looking for is Enunciation, not Rhetorical Charisma", and "Enunciation is better termed a sub-ability than a stat". They also attempted to defend governing something as simple as urination with a formula as complex as '''d100 + Urination Skill Points + (average of Health and Hand-Eye Coordination skill modifiers) +/- ("Time Since Last Urination vs. Ounces Drunk" modifier)''', without even attempting to justify why urinating is a skill that exists. They DID attempt to justify why it's possible to have an average speaking speed higher than your maximum speaking speed, but their justification had something to do with conflating "random" distributions with "even" distributions in order to claim that bell curve distributions aren't random, and... look, you were warned about the brain damage, okay?

==Setting==

Want the details? You do. Courtesy of the 1d4chan authors who had to pause for throwing up many times over many months, here we go:

It's pre-Christian Europe (more specifically, a hodgepodge of medieval Europe and the Roman Empire) with a bit of Semitic cultural immigration. <s>Nephilim</s> Anakim exist as winged sexy humans, the closest thing to the Judeo-Christian God is actually the result of a normal spell that makes a bush burn with magical fires in perpetuity and gives cryptic answers along with "I Am What I Am", suggesting Moses just did a random spell and thought it was YHWH speaking. It is a mix of Rome's darkest stereotypes meets Viking myths, but every race is as fuck-tarded as the creators. The Anakim are almost all slaves(even though their extreme stats can easily earn them a dominant position in society). Their males have enormous penises and random quirks that makes them fit for a horror game rather than erotic fantasy, their females being shapely sluts with similar weird shit going on. The Bugbears are bronze age Vikings that go so [[Edgy]] that would make [[Drowtales]] seem tame by comparison, raping everyone they don't kill in coastal raids and taking the survivors to "Processing Centers", slave pits with ''extremely'' torturous workpits with no productivity in mind but making the worst piss-shit-torture-dehumanization porn play in a game that's full of that crap. Human women die 100% in stillborn childbirth raped by Bugbears but they keep them from killing themselves just for fun. Bugbear "scientists" vivisect and rape human slaves for "education", and magic is state-monopolized, and Bugbear clans support Bugbear criminals raping and killing in other races' lands. [[Magical Realm|Bugbear women have no names, and daughters are "brought to adolescence" by their fathers]]. Light Elves are relatively tame, but they still beat the shit out of trespassers and starve criminals slowly to death, and [[Wat|women have to play a flute as they are getting fucked to determine the child's character]]. Dark Elves have weekly masturbation contests, live under trees and rape/kill trespassers, and fuck each other's asses (anal only) in masked gatherings. Subterranean Trolls have a punishment system of hitting genitals with a hammer, male trolls have to kidnap a human woman as a slave present to be enslaved/raped/killed/eaten, and if the female refuses the gift, the male takes the woman to be dismembered alive. Ogres are cannibals (I don't know much about this setting, but that sounds really damn tame compared to everything else), Hill Trolls are sick fucks that get hard touching the brains of caught and slaughtered humans and like to fuck brain matter and the corpses before eating them. Humans are no better: being caught performing magic means getting raped and burned alive publicly, butchers regularly add human meat from cheaper slaves and dead humans to pork mix, brothels and slavery is rampant, and even the priests join nightly gang-rape groups that are neither persecuted, nor stigmatized, nor punished. Even Dwarves get fucked up with /pol/ tier horseshittery, with White Dwarves being Good, Black Dwarves being Evil, and Brown Dwarves being Neutral, or what passes for neutral in this hellhole of a setting.

Gore, cannibalism, slavery, /d/, [[/pol/|racism]] pentifecta:

[[Magical Realm]] at its finest.

==Mechanics==
...Are you sure? Are you ''absolutely'' sure?

...Okay, you asked for it.

The GM is called the "Aedile", because that's an actual Latin-derived word for 'master of the coliseum games', or 'game-master' for short. What is it with authors of explicitly smutty rpg materials like this and "The Book of Erotic Fantasy" that they have to be [[Cato Sicarius|pretentious dicks]] about it? (Answer: Because in the original version he was... wait for it... the '''Maim'''Master. You may now groan.)

The intro says you only need to know a little algebra, "and even that is relatively rare." It also says you only need two d10. Both of these are '''filthy fucking lies'''. Ability scores are derived from averaging 'sub-abilities' rolled as '''(10[[d100]]/5)-1''' and modified by one of three different types of percentages, and conditions during the game may change your sub-abilities which means you need to recalculate your ability scores on-the-fly. Ability score checks are 3d10, so no you need more than two dice.

Apparently you'll need this "little algebra" because [[what|you solve quadratic formulas to find out whether or not your rape slave is pregnant]]. Then you roll [[What|d10,000,000]] to find out if she's going to have quintuplets. [[Rage|What the fuck]].

The character sheet is '''eleven pages long'''. There are 20 sub-abilities (including "Enunciation" and "Spatial Intelligence"; also note that by this point in chargen you have already rolled your 2d10 eighty times), which determine 5 ability scores. The ethics system is a D&D good-evil/lawful-chaotic using "ethics" which is described vaguely differently from "morals" (both of which are based on a butchered reading of Aristotelian philosophy), four different "temperament" scores based on bodily humours (and by the way, the book dedicated '''23 PAGES''' to describing your alignment alone), a primary and secondary temperament in addition to that, and a disposition that is different from that too(which is another 22 pages long). On the second page of the character sheet are the following essential measurements: manhood length, manhood circumference, [[anal circumference]] potential, vaginal circumference potential, vaginal depth potential, areola diameter, nipple length, cup size, tongue size, hymen resistance, areola hue, foot size, fist circumference, head circumference, handedness. These measurements are ''essential'', because during combat your roll may cause you to accidentally start raping your opponent, and how many hitpoints they lose depends on the mismatch between the circumference of your appendage and their orifice. In case you missed some of that: '''it is possible to accidentally rape an opponent to death during normal combat.''' THEN you have to roll for other things like your height and weight (and then calculate your BMI based on those), most and least attractive features, hair color, skin color, visual acuity, age (which also acts as a modifier for all those abilities and sub-abilities, forcing you to go back and change all those stats again), a check to see if your Intelligence score is low enough to qualify for "[[Stupid|Retard Strength]]" bonuses, birthday, social class, birthplace, number of siblings, and marital status.

In other words, roll randomly for just about everything that any other game system would allow the player to choose for themselves, in the unlikely event that they desperately needed to know the precise size of your foot to the nearest hundredth of an inch.

Among the '''four-hundred and eighteen skills''' each character must keep track of are "Basketweaving" (Hand-Eye, Common Sense), "Clockmaking" (Spatial), "Delousing" (Hand-Eye), "Glovemaking" (Spatial), "Massage" (Kinetic Charisma, Hand-Eye), "Spitting" (Enunciation), and even "Urinating". [[Wat|Yes, pissing is a skill. Yes, you can fail your rolls to piss]], which as you could see in the last section are far more complex than they could possibly need to be.

A character's body has '''seventeen hit-locations''', each with independent hit-point totals, each with their own armour equipment slots, and each of the seventeen pieces of armour have four different types of damage resistance (brawling, hacking, pounding and stabbing).

Magical items range from the mostly useless, to the suicidally dangerous, to the ''completely insane''. Here's a list of notable ones.
*Philter of (race name) Lust: Drink this and every being of the race listed within 100 feet will try to fuck you.
*Cloak of Self-Craving: The wearer will try to perform oral sex on themselves, possibly breaking his/her neck in the process.
*Chastity Belt of Cursed Impregnation: The wearer is knocked up. The difference between this and the uncursed version is that the cursed version always makes the unborn child a girl. Really.
*Jar of Jacking Off: "Whenever a male opens this jar, they must pass a Drive sub-ability check at TH 80 or be compelled to force their fuckstick into the jar. Once inside, the jar will inexplicably grip it firmly and jerk it to completion, even against the will of the opener. Upon completion, the cummer[sic] must roll percentile dice. If the results are 01-10, then the jar becomes pregnant. If the jar is pregnant, it will not allow itself to be opened, but will care for the fetus within, which will be heard screaming by others within 1d100 feet day and night. After 9 months of fetal torture, the child will be born and the jar will break. If the jar is broken during its pregnancy, then the dying and twitching fetus will explode after 1d6 rounds of twitching. The explosion will cause 1d4 Life Points of sonic damage to all within 1d4 miles. Baby parts are inexplicably everywhere. When born, the baby will be Unethical Immoral (translation: Chaotic Evil), will serve the father loyally, will obsessively collect jars, and seem to be male but have no penis, but oversized testicles, which can never ejaculate. Therefore, this child will be forever frustrated. Any child of a jar will insist that others call them “Chucky."" What a reference to the ''Child's Play'' movies is doing in a "historically/mythically accurate RPG" is anyone's guess. Interestingly, this seems to have partially inspired Death Stranding. In hindsight we should have all known Hideo Kojima would be a [[/d/M]].
*Seed of Hate: Planting this seed in front of a druid's house causes a tree to grow that makes everything hate the druid in question. The only way to kill a tree that resulted from this seed is for the druid to start having anal sex with random animals until he sows a "seed of love". This may cause him to develop a bestiality fetish.
*Mirror of Many: A ripoff of the mirror from Evil Dead.
*[[The Lord of the Rings|Ring of the Lords]]: It's the fucking One Ring.
*Cursed Dildo of Impregnation: The user is impregnated with another dildo, which is likely to kill her.
*(weapon) of Ravishing: The user will occasionally try to rape random women with the weapon, which will somehow impregnate them with another rapist-weapon (that kills them upon giving "birth" to it).
* [[Nazi|Armor of Jewy Jewbacca: "Whosoever dons this armor will acquire a nose twice the size and a manhood half the size. Further, the wearer will become extremely greedy and fight to the death for one silver piece]]. Finally, the wearer acquires 2 inches of hair all over their body, resulting in halving their Facial Charisma and Bodily Attractiveness. While hairy, the wearer must bathe every 1d6 hours or smell foul." There are three other armors just like this which turn the wearer into an ethnic stereotype with no benefits whatsoever. According to Byron, this was supposed to be "controversial humor". So funny everyone forgot to laugh.
*The other armors, if you wanted to satisfy your morbid curiosity:
** [[/pol/|Armour of Nigrous Nincompoopery: Whosoever dons this armour experiences a loss of 1d100 points from each sub-ability of Intelligence, Wisdom, and Charisma.]] The ass of the wearer will grow by 50% and be abnormally high. If the wearer is male, then those around him are 80% likely to believe that his manhood has increased, though it has not. The skin of the wearer becomes cursed and dark as night. Disposition turns to [[Alignment#Chaotic_Evil|Unethical Immoral]]. Temperament becomes phlegmatic. The eyes of the wearer are visible 3 miles away at night. The wearer will have a body odour for 1d10 feet. On the bright side, the Physical Fitness of the wearer increases by 10%. The armour may be removed at will. Also the name translates to "Armour of Nigger Retardation". Smooth.
** Armour of Gookums: Whosoever dons this armour experiences an increase of 1d20 points of Intelligence in each sub-ability and is reduced to 80% of natural Height. The eyelids of the wearer will swell as though hit with a maul, and Vision is reduced to 25%. Most importantly, the Manhood or Cup Size is reduced to 50%. Strangely, the ass of the wearer will shrink, drop, and droop.
** Armour of Greasians: Whosoever wears this armour acquires hair that is greasy and dark, they lose half of their Drive sub-ability, are reduced to 90% of natural Height, are 80% likely to beat their spouse if they have one, and will be magically unemployed for 1d100 days. However, if the wearer plays drums, the wearer gets a bonus of 1d100 to their skill check.
*(weapon) of Torturon: The wielder becomes obsessed with removing his victim's eyes and shoving them into the victim's nose. They also take up sunbathing naked on top of cottages. Okay, that's oddly specific and rather disturbing, especially given that one of Byron Hall's friends is called Torturon...

The magic system is split into ceremonial magic (which is situational at best and often utterly useless for doing anything you might actually need) and chaos magic (which requires you to perform a ritual that requires a roll on a large-ass syllable chart in case it requires a chant to perform, some random ingredients you might not even be able to acquire, and can take days to perform the required ritual). An example of a few spells follows; italicized spell names are ceremonial magic, and everything else is chaos magic:
*''Against Every Wild Animal, Aquatic Creature, and Robbers'': Keeps wild animals, aquatic creatures, and robbers away from you. Everything else that can kill you can still do so.
*Call God: Summons a god. The rulebook specifically states that whatever god in question will not be happy about being summoned and will probably kill the caster.
*''Eternal Spell for Binding a Lover'': Smear the listed ingredients on the head of your dick, and when you fuck someone with it they'll beg you to stick it in them at least once a day. (Numerous other "love spells" with similar effects are also present.)
*Fatal: [[Exterminatus|Kills everything on whatever horrid world the game takes place on, including the user.]] If only every game started with this spell being cast.
*Force Fart: Forces the target to fart, obviously.
*Have Her Cadaver: Cast this on a dead woman and she'll look, sound, smell, taste, and feel just like she was alive but unconscious. The spell description explicitly states that it is meant to aid necrophilia. Draw your own conclusions.
*Oroanal: The victim's mouth now doubles as his anus (or vice versa). Did we mention that the effects of this spell are permanent?
*Perpetual Orgasm:...take a fucking guess. The rulebook mentions that not only does this kill the target, but also that they continue to have an orgasm even after they die.
*Prognathism: The target's skull becomes prognathous - the lower half extends, the upper half retracts, Intelligence sub-abilities will be reduced by 15% and the target's speech will become "slang". [[/pol/|Yes, this is what you think]].
*''Test of Pregnancy'': Self-explanatory, and disturbingly likely to be necessary.
*Wish: Like the DnD version, but the GM is encouraged to be [[That Guy|as literal as possible, even picking a definition of the word at random if word has multiple definitions]]. A character wishes for a lot of gold? He gets several thousand pounds of gold bars. Dropped on top of him.

And then there are the miscast tables, which have a variety of notably bizarre effects, including but certainly not limited to:
*The next shit you take coming to life and trying to kill you.
*Fruit growing out of the caster's penis/vagina, which can be consumed for stat bonuses.
*Gay ogres popping out of nowhere and trying to have buttsex with everyone nearby. [[Meme|It's all ogre now]].
*A "scratch and sniff" vagina appears on the caster's head.
*[[Mutant|An eyeball appears on the caster's penis]], and can somehow act as a lie detector.
*The target's skin turns black. [[/pol/|"Aedile may decide appropriate penalties."]]
*A gerbil falls out of the target's asshole. This was probably inspired by that urban legend about Richard Gere. You know the one.
*The caster or target become compelled to say ridiculous shit that sounds like it was ripped off from death metal.
*The nearest woman is convinced that her name is "Cuntrina", and insists that everyone nearby refers to her as such.
*A disembodied penis with wings appears and tries to rape everything nearby.
*Accidentally consuming the enemy while being raped.
*Accidentally cast FATAL (see above). Everybody hopes to get this one.
And many, many more.

Classes are no less peculiar- they range from the standard fare of Warriors, Mages, and the like to things which no sane person would play (such as Delousers, Inkmakers, and of course Whores, who get a longer write-up than most other classes combined save for the ones with giant tables). Every class earns AP (the equivalent of experience points) in different ways, and in some cases it is earned so slowly that a character (or even their player) can die of old age before they even reach level 2.

TL;DR: It takes all the overcomplexity of World of Synnibar - which, I shit you not, had an equation to show how hard you could breathe - took out the lore, classes and just about everything else that made Synnibar worth a damn, added so many sexual perversions (which the introduction has the '''sheer fucking audacity''' to claim as being present due to "historic/mythical relevance") that it would make ''Slaanesh'' look twice, and shat out one of the worst RPG systems ever conceived.

==External Links==
===Files===
*[http://web.archive.org/web/20030228195602/http://www.hyperbooks.com/fatal/fatal.pdf 2003's "Fantasy Adventure to Adult Lechery" the 1st Edition of FATAL]
**'''(DO NOT EXPOSE GAME TO FACE. <s>FIRE IS BETTER ALTERNATIVE.</s> BURNING IT IS A GRAVE [[HERESY]] TO FIRE. FIRE ON FACE IS BETTER ALTERNATIVE TO GAME.)'''
*[http://web.archive.org/web/20040413024552/http://www.hyperbooks.com/fatal/fatal.pdf 2004's "From Another Time, Another Land" the 2nd edition]
**Sanitized, removes some of the nigger jokes and child-anus-tearing rape. What a truly depressing display of "The Man's censorship".
*<s>URL for random character generator needed</s> <s>[http://www.mediafire.com/file/ff39h4t8cfp8c7f/FATAL+Character+Generator.rar Random Character Generator] And the link is broken...</s> <s> [http://www.mediafire.com/file/9x76g2l1hol30uq/FATAL_Character_Generator.exe New link for the sick and curious.] '''You have been warned.'''</s> Broken too, <s>un</s>fortunately. <s>[https://www.mediafire.com/file/r9wfdovrb2iqtaf/FATAL_Character_Generator%25282%2529.exe The Even Newer Link!]</s> Also broken [https://drive.google.com/file/d/1LynIUHwOTIywsddLby3mOemfacUUfXtP/view?usp=sharing Now hosted on Google Drive] , since the FATAL [https://i.imgur.com/SjpAXGo.png devs somehow DMCA'd] the previous attempts at sharing here via MediaFire. Here's hoping Byron Hall can't stop this one.
*[https://archive.org/details/FromAnotherTimeAnotherLand/Fantasy%20Adventure%20to%20Adult%20Lechery All the FATAL sourcebooks. Every single one. Byron Hall himself put them on the Archive, so he must have wanted everyone to see them.]

===Reviews===
*The (in)famous [http://web.archive.org/web/20080208091645/http://atrocities.primaryerror.net/fatal.html Review] of FATAL, courtesy of the Wayback Machine ([http://www.rpg.net/reviews/archive/14/14567.phtml Updated, non-Geocities version]).
*The [http://wiki.rpg.net/index.php/FATALReviewRebuttal "rebuttal" to said review] in which the author and one of his friends dig their own graves. It's comedy gold, in a disgusting and shameful sort of way, but you'll probably laugh your ass off regardless.
*A group of Irish roleplayers taking a crack at doing character creation. It goes as well as you'd expect. [http://theadventuringparty.libsyn.com/character-creation-may-2011-from-another-time-another-land]
*The [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Iy8hjxHuRHk official theme song (no, really) of FATAL]
*Famous TV tropes [http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/posts.php?discussion=7ixhxjqoe9swz1xv4bxgw5h0 discussion] thread with numerous tries to get through FATAL.
*[https://systemmasterypodcast.com/2017/02/27/rifts-parts-1-system-mastery-70-2/ System Mastery podcast review] They only do it cause it was a Patreon goal.
*[http://www.somethingawful.com/dungeons-and-dragons/fatal-worst-rpg/1/ Reasons] not to review FATAL
*[https://www.reddit.com/r/rpg/comments/18d80q/okay_everyone_wanted_more_detail_about_the_fatal Playreport] by samtravis on reddit
*[http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?153581-FATAL-A-Campaign-Journal Playreport] by Dust on giantitp.com

==Gallery==
<center>
<gallery>
Image:Fatalexplained.jpg
Image:Fatal-what01.jpg
Image:Fatal-what02.jpg
Image:Fatal-what04.jpg
Image:OddlySpecific.JPG
Image:Spaceballs_and_FATAL.png
Image:Fatalalignment.jpg|A completely original and not at all derivative set of alignments. Though admittedly, this is much better named than the D&D alignment system.
File:Worth Playing.png|Yes, this actually happened. [http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/42780325/#p42780693]
File:Sorcerers_and_Spermlords_The_mundane_reality.jpg
File:Roleplaying_MILFS_(Fatal_Reality)_.jpeg
</gallery>
</center>

==See Also==
* [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oVKRf3b9fPo Afreemanornot's cursory review of FATAL]
* [[Black Tokyo]], The sexual perversions of Black Tokyo make FATAL look like a 40 y/o lossless virgin, but its heritage as a d20 modern supplement renders it actually playable (which makes it worse the more you think about it since you can't use the excuse of it being unplayable to avoid it like you can to FATAL). [http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive.html?searchall=Black+Tokyo]
* [[GURPS Sex]]
* [[Racial Holy War]], another game that is widely considered to be way worse. You can not actually play this game. Yes, it's pretty much what the name makes it sound like.
* [[The Aristocrats, FATAL-style]]
* [[VTNL]], a Russian game which is a serious contender to being even worse than FATAL. It was designed for 14 years, by a complete buffoon who ignored everything RPG related during that time, to keep his original vision. It has rules for how to properly roll dice, and the GM is encouraged to punch the players in the face, if they fail to roll according to them.
[[Category:Roleplaying]][[Category:FAIL]]

Waifu

2023-03-02T14:02:36Z

2601:41:C77F:9B60:1826:9A79:781:A034: /* In Short */

<blockquote>'''"If you have a waifu, you have no laifu."'''</blockquote>

"'''Waifu'''" (a Romanization of the Japanese pronunciation of "wife") originally was used to denote a female [[anime]] character - specifically one's favored anime character. It could be said to be the personification of an ideal significant other, but most often denotes a character one felt attraction to beyond the average anime girl. Originated as part of a one-off gag in ''Azumanga Daioh!'' for whoever even cares.

Despite being exactly the kind of [[weeaboo]] identifier that 4chan attacks like hungry wolves, it's also the kind of short-and-snappy universal term that faggots can't help but use anyway when they stop giving a shit about looking cooler than they are.

A less common variation is "Husbando," the male equivalent of waifu. Never mind the fact that adding -o at the end makes it sound more Spanish than Japanese. Even less common is "Daughteru," used to describe a strictly platonic and paternal attraction for a younger anime girl as a way to indicate a repressed desire to become a responsible father and to have a family to care for (sexual attraction to an underage-looking anime girl is [[loli|a different issue altogether]]). And then there's the weirdos at [[/k/]], who like to describe their favorite gun as their "Raifu." We'd make an overcompensation joke, but that would make more sense than what having an infatuation for firearms would imply.

==On /tg/==
On /tg/ ''any'' female character is often referred to as Waifu, particularly if she is a [[List of /tg/ Characters|character made on /tg/]]. Occasionally it is used seriously to express love for (or the desire to have sex with) a female character. More often, it is used negatively, as a slur - implying that said character is only popular because she is female and /tg/ wants to bone her, or to suggest that the person being addressed has an unhealthy obsession with said character. Some have gone so far to use waifu to mark entire entities or groups, such as the [[Sisters of Battle]]. Such usage of waifu is most often accompanied by much [[rage]]. In fairness their predecessors were called the Brides of the Emperor.

This new usage has come about as the direct result of meme decay, specifically the meme leaving forums like 4chan and finding its way into broad use by the [[weeaboo|anime community as a whole]]. The term became, like the much older ''desu'', so overused by immature and irritating 12-year-olds that /tg/ has summarily executed any worth it had left.

==In Short==
Waifu is a term used to disparage ''any'' female OC on /tg/ regardless of quality or the intent behind her creation. If you want to see hilarious rage, [https://waifuforlaifu.com/pages/waifu-generator keep making more Waifus].

==An Alternate Take==
It's important to note that, according to some people, "Waifu" is more a verb or adjuctive than a noun: It refers to the "relationship" between the weeaboo and the character, regardless of the intent of the author.

Well, unless you're accusing the Author of ''directly and personally'' Waifuing the character, and even then, it's only the ''Author's'' Waifu. For more on this kind of situation search for "waifu" under our [[Mary Sue]] article.

Thus, unless a character stands accused of being ''designed'' to inspire Waifuing, no character can be a Waifu in-and-of themselves, because '''any''' character can be Waifued or Husbandoed. Yes, including [[Nurgle]] and [[Cthulhu]]. Under this view, the appropriate name for a character designed to be Waifu'd is "Waifu-bait".

==Those Who Stand Accused of Being Waifus==
(Or, in the alternate, "Designed to be waifus" or "Waifu-bait")
* [[Towergirls]]
* [[Monstergirls]]
* [[Blue]]
* [[Boone]]
* [[Bjorn the Fell Handed]]
* [[Chem-chan]]
* [[Elf|Brown Elves]]
* [[Cultist-Chan]]
* [[Lolicron]]
* [[Elesh Norn]]
* [[Sheoldred]]
* [[Sisters of Battle]]
* [[Warhammer High|The Primarchs' Daughters]]
* [[Xeno]]
* Just about any female [[Mary Sue]] written by a male author.
* Any other female character who is not utterly repulsive (and even then there's a chance they'll be accused anyway)

==External Links==
*[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_YtwPPsBKGQ An educational film on Waifuism]
*[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9qTmBbPvqcs How to pick your ideal Waifu]
*[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mn_bLGhZCaY Your waifu doesn't love you]
*[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ueX_QV6CXU8 A short educational film about life on the front lines of the (anime) Waifu wars]
*[http://knowyourmeme.com/memes/grape-kun Even animals can have waifus!]

[[Category:Meme]][[Category:Weeaboo]]