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Warspheres

2019-01-26T22:34:33Z

2601:647:5401:28EC:C955:41DE:12FC:B907:

[[File:20160930230501_1.jpg|350px|thumb|right|A kroot Warsphere being huge and shit. Very appropiately GW gave the birds an egg-shaped starship.]]
{{Topquote|Lord Admiral is not afraid of chickens! Okay, he may be a little bit afraid of chickens.|Random Imperial Navy personnel after encountering a Kroot Warsphere.}}

==Introduction and Origins==
Kroot Warspheres are giant spaceships built and used by the xenos species known as [[kroot|kroots]]. it is the main spaceship of the kroot race, and thus, their only way to explore the galaxy without the aid of the Tau Empire. A warsphere is a fairly primitive spacecraft when compared to the vehicles of other races, but it's the most technologically advanced construction the kroots have. How the primitive kroot can build them is up to speculation, but most members of the Ordo Xenos and Earth Caste scientists theorize that, after centuries of ork consumption, the kroot have gained an inherent knowledge of technology, just as ork mekboys do. As such, they are able to instictively build spacecraft good enough for space travel, and that is aided when they combine it with Tau technology. In fact, kroot warspheres have a massive advantage over tau crafts, due to them havin a slow, but functional, Warp-Drives. With Tau not having mastered this tech, kroot have a definitive advantage in regards to mobility, even though everything else is inferior to almost any tau vessel. This makes Earth Caste scientists very mad, [[not as planned|being utterly unable to understand how the warspheres work at all]], which, in turn, [[troll|makes kroot cackle hysterically when asked]]. The fact that the kroot don't need navigators to jump into the Warp and yet they don't get attacked by daemons (for the most part) suggests that the ork theory is more correct than originally thought, due to them also being capable of creating ships capable of moving though the Immaterium. According to some sources, the kroot possess some sort of sixth sense to navigate through the Warp and not end up lost, usually finding inhabitable planets at the end of their travels, probably to find the rarest DNA strains to add to their genome. This could also be a reference to many bird species having some sort of "inner compass" to make them find their destination through kilometers and kilometers during their migrations.

==Functionality and design==
Design-wise, warspheres are effectively giant egg-shape spacecraft comprised of various ring-like structures around a center that houses most of the engines and navigation personnel. The size of the ship allows it to be a fully-functioning flying town for millions and millions of kroots. The size of these things is ridiculously big, usually surpasing in size to all tau vessels and most of the Imperium's biggest ships. The question of how they can build such massive structures when they don't have any sort of orbital construction facilities is beyond our understanding, and probably just GW not really caring about things as gravity (or maybe they are just going by the ork theory, which probably makes Earth Caste scientists even more baffled). It also has the neat function of being able to bury itself once landed, and serve as some sort of colonial structure for the kroot to start colonizing the planet. However, the warspheres are far from perfect: in regular space, they are very slow and their weaponry is not that effective, due to their power output systems being very primitive. As such, they are relatively vulnerable, due to being a massive target that can't defend itself very well. Kroot won't use these crafts unless they are either paid really well, they are guaranteed their protection with guardian ships or they are in the process of colonising a planet.

==The Warsphere in Battlefleet Gothic==
I don't play Battlefleet Gothic, you fill this part.
Neither do I but someone needs to do it. Well I don't play either so I'm not putting it. Guess this won't get filled in because I don't play it either. I mean, I play it, but I don't really want to fill this out. Cheers mate.

==The Warsphere in Battlefleet Gothic: Armada==
Tau can deploy Kroot Warspheres as auxiliary ship, equivalent to battleship class for other factions (highest tier of ships).
In theory warspheres bring much needed boarding capabilities (space melee) and are relatively cheap (similar cost to their mid tier ships and half the cost of their top tier ships).
Being able to take two tanky, cheap spheres and support them with mid tier ships that are already quite powerful sounds great on paper, in reality kroot spheres are horrible.

# problem is their movement, they are very slow, they wont be able arrive to objectives on time, and they wont be able catch up with anything to properly board it.
# spheres are no battleships bristling with weapons, their only weapons are weak missiles, not enough to attack nor defend.
# unique mechanics are fun, but not this time. Kroot warsphere automatically leaves the battle when they reach 30% health, you have no way to stop it, this may weaken your fleet (warspheres are useless you probably wont even notice) and you might lose this ship in deep space having to either pay or wait several turns for it to return. Second is special movement system, spheres can move only in one direction, you need to use special energy to change direction, other factions can use this energy to increase their forward movement or make fast evasive maneuvers. This gives your opponents advantage to take your already weak sphere apart (eldar maneuvers, chaos range, orks will ram you etc..)

TL;DR While being cheap and interesting idea, they will never achieve the only goal they were made for. Demiurg strongholds (flying rape) while twice as expensive completely outshine the warspheres, while lower tier ships are powerful enough to handle situations without kroot support and are too important and effective to waste them supporting the warsphere (as they would in in real world)

{{Template:Tau}}
[[Category:Xenos]]

Kroot

2019-01-26T22:26:38Z

2601:647:5401:28EC:C955:41DE:12FC:B907:

[[Image:Kroot.png|thumbnail|right|300px|In Tau Empire, chicken eats YOU!]]

{{topquote|They are fierce indeed these Kroot, and savage. I look upon them and tremble at their ferocity. I can only hope that when the enemy sees them they tremble as I do.|Por'vre Tau Cho, Water caste envoy}}

The '''Kroot''' are a vassal species to the [[Tau|Tau Empire]]. Rather bitey. Basically carnivorous space chickens who look like a cross between Amerindians, the dreadlocked aliens from ''Predator'', and ancient [[Terra|Terran]] terror birds, with a bit of D&D's [[Aarakocora]] thrown inn. They steal genetic traits of things they eat, and work for people who aren't the Tau. Which means they are cool.

However, the Kroot see little support from [[Games Workshop]] and players in general, likely due to the fact that their odd stats, high frailty despite being billed as a melee force, and lack of wargear in the Tau list make them less than effective, and their mercenary codex is from an old Chapter Approved (and thus no longer legal). And as we all know, GW would rather just make reams of unnecessary [[Space Marine]] variant codices than give an update to a faction who actually needs it.

For those interested, there's [http://advancedtautactica.com/viewtopic.php?f=1&t=12778&st=0&sk=t&sd=a| a high-quality and mostly balanced 5th-ed Fan-Dex]. Most people will let you use it in a friendly game.

As of the most recent [[Dark Eldar]] codex, the [[Haemonculus]] Covens has taken a liking to the way Kroot gastronomy reacts to evolution and had conducted a gigantic raid which, to put it lightly, utterly [[Anal circumference|assraped Pech a new glory hole.]] The Dark Eldar pretty much [[Looted]] nearly the entire biosphere of Pech including a several dozen Kroot Shapers, seriously we aren't even joking on the whole looted part. Essentially the Dark Eldar almost [[Exterminatus]] an entire planet through [[Blood Ravens|sheer theft that would make a Bloody Magpie proud.]] Suffice to say, Pech was saved by a counterattack by the Tau, but by then it was too little too late. The Kroot's homeworld lay devastated and the rescuing Tau party was greeted with a grizzly scene of mutilated Kroot corpses laid out in Eldar Lexicon which translates to, "[[Rape|Welcome to the feast.]]" The Tau in all their naive weeaboo hats, promptly shat themselves a brown stinky brick whilst the captured Kroots were promptly turned into KFC. Since that day, the Tau have encountered many similar messages on their worlds, which may just paint a sign that our little weeaboos will be the Dark Eldar's new fuckbuddy.

There are words in the wind now very faint that we might, <s>just might</s> not ever get a kroot codex thanks to the Imperium centric focus of the setting. Thanks Geedubs. However, we ''will'' be getting Kill Team rules for a Kroot Mercenary faction in the January 2019 White Dwarf. For what it's worth.

==Physiology==
[[File:OW EOI Kroot Shaper.png|thumbnail|right|300px|''By instinctively isolating and analysing the DNA contained with the flesh of potential food sources, these exceptional Kroot, known as Shapers, can determine whether the prey’s characteristics are favourable or detrimental to the genetic advancement of their Kindred, and can thereby guide the development of the other Kroot. They are the wardens and caretakers of their Kindred’s genetic inheritance, and they guard it against regression, corruption, and unwanted mutation.'']]
[[Xenology]] suggests that the reason Kroot are humanoid, able to walk and think as well as build the giant warp-capable warspheres they use for getting around in space (while generally being on the technological level of a medieval society - the only reason their guns can really hurt stuff is because the Tau gave them advanced pulse munitions) is that at one time in their history, an [[Ork]] ship crashed on Pech (the Kroot's home planet). The Kroot promptly started eating the dazed survivors of this crash (how they managed to not end up with a full-blown Ork infestation remains anyone's guess) and subsequently managed to gain some of the Orks' innate understanding for technology, as well as a measure of their resilience. Oh, and the basic humanoid body layout on top of that. Two arms, bipedal gait, the whole shebang. Evidence for this are pieces of wreckage marked with Ork glyphs scattered all over Pech that the Kroot regard as sacred objects, as well as the presence of hybrid fungal matter in parts of their body.

For some reason, the fluff likes to point out how revolting the Kroot are for their carnivorous practices, even though, when you really stop and think about it, the Kroot are one of the more morally upright races around - they're explicitly not xenophobic racists, they ''have to'' eat dead sapients to stay intelligent (unlike, say, [[Space Marines]] and [[Tyranids]] who also eat people's brains to gain knowledge, or the fucking [[Dark Eldar]]), and they're not notably more cruel than anyone else but the Tau, who seem to be the only people in the universe who more or less tolerate them. Although this may have to do with point of view, most of the time it's the Tau or [[Imperial Guard]] who would find the eating of the dead, friend or foe, gross. Tyranids are viewed as mindless animals, so eating things isn't as "wrong" for them, and most people forgot Space Marines can gain knowledge by eating brains. Most who do spend their time around Kroot generally seem to like them, though. The "revolting" part may be more of a knee-jerk reaction from people not used to seeing bird people eating dudes.

You may have noticed that this article talks a lot about eating. According to Chapter Approved in [[White Dwarf]], the Kroot physiology basically revolves around their mouth. They have multiple stomachs, no excretory organs (what they can't digest, they puke up), and females even breed by transforming a stomach into a womb and then vomiting up the baby/babies when it's/they're full grown. Take a wild guess how they conceive.

...The answer is back rubs. Male Kroot have specialized pores that secrete a gene-bearing bio-fluid (what experts refer to as "alien bird-jizz") on their palms, whilst female Kroot have "receptor pores" for this fluid on the smalls of their back. So when two Kroot make babies, the male has to give the female a back rub. Yeah, we thought it would be [[Heterosexual Sex in the Missionary Position|kinkier]], too.

Fun Fact: they are the only nonhuman species that can have [[Blank]]s, likely because they ate one at some point.

==Culture==

Kroot also moonlight as mercenaries for races other than the Tau, though about the only sapient beings whose flesh they won't eat are the Tau, since the Tau saved them from extinction. Mercenary bands eat lots of different stuff, and so can have various genetic traits. Thus, Kroot can use [[Eldar|Weeaboo Fightan Magiks]], be [[Orks|cunnin' but fighty]], or have [[Imperial Guard|balls of steel]], depending on who they've eaten, but not as well as the originals. Eating [[Chaos]]-types causes Bad Things™ to happen. They also refuse to eat the 'Nids, because the Shapers, the Kroot leaders, fear becoming slaves to the [[Hive Mind]]. They also can't eat anyone infected by the [[Necron]]s' Nanites because Nanites will turn Kroot into another Necron/[[C'Tan]] zombie slave. They also get paid in weapons, allowing them to use Imperial and Tau special weapons together, and nearly their entire army can infiltrate, <strike>and get 1st turn assault if they're lucky</strike> (NOPE, 6th edition ended that shit). Kroot don't use tanks or much in the way of tech (aside from long rifle-like guns with blades on both ends), instead using native animals derived from the Kroot genus. They have attack dogs, gorillas with elephant guns, riding beasts like allosaurs, and really big riding beasts like T. rexes. Think the Gungans from ''The Phantom Menace'', only <s>not totally lame</s> [[Awesome]]. There is no contention that Kroot are exponentially cooler than Gungans. <span style='color:yellow;font-size:115%'> More meat? Good! BWWAAAK! <span style='color:yellow;font-size:115%'>

They also have a rather dark sense of humor; for example, offering human meat to human diplomats because [[Troll|they think seeing their reactions are funny.]] This is also shown in the second Last Chancers book "Kill Team", where Kage is forced to eat a human brain (while he goes into horrific detail about the taste and texture). After this, the Kroot reveals that this was a secret test of character, but also that it was good for shits and giggles. In general, the Kroot sense of humor revolves around making other people profoundly uncomfortable. For example, a Kroot might walk into the same elevator as a Water Caste diplomat, turn up her pungent pheromones to full blast, and silently laugh her bird-woman ass off as the increasingly-uncomfortable fellow passenger tries to ignore it with less and less success.

Kroot also have shamans (psykers). They pilot warp ships called [[Warspheres]]; large, spherical things of dubious quality but capable of warp travel. They have lost souls to the warp, especially [[Khorne]]. Despite all this, however, their patrons in the T'au remain unaware or unphased by the nature of The Warp, which probably speaks more to the Greater Good's "make other cultures like we are and absorb nothing" philosophy rather than a taciturn quality of the kroot. Though 8th edition hinted otherwise...

==Known Kroot Forms==
As mentioned above, the downside of Kroot consumptive evolution is that it's really easy for them to get "stuck" on the wrong path and devolve permanently into an atavistic form. As a consequence, every animal-filled ecological niche on Pech is now filled by some form of degenerated kroot. But, so far, only a select handful of Kroot offshoots have been explicitly called out...

*'''[[Kroot Hound]]s''' are one of the most iconic of these strains, having been around since the Kroot were released. These Kroot degenerated into small, sleek, pack-hunting quadrupeds, easily tamed by their still-sapient cousins.
* '''[[Krootox]]es''' are the second-most iconic Kroot strains; degenerated into hulking, ape-like herbivores, they're mostly used as beasts of burden and as mobile mounts for heavy artillery.
*'''[[Lesser Knarloc]]s''' are sort of a step-up from the Kroot Hounds, being analogous to either a pack-hunting terror-bird or a more avian pack of velociraptors. Kroot like to ride them as cavalry.
*'''[[Great Knarloc]]s''' are much, ''much'' bigger, solo-hunter variants of the standard Knarlocs. If a lesser Knarloc is a Velociraptor, the great one is a beaky T-Rex.
*'''Krootors''' are swamp-dwelling, amphibious predators, essentially a Krootified alligator. Their only known appearance in the canon so far is in [[Black Crusade (RPG)|The Screaming Vortex]], on the planet Asphodel.

==TL;DR==

Kroot: Shoot like Tau with bolters. Move and hit like Eldar. Die like Guardsmen. (And have an amour save that will save them from [[lasgun|lasguns]] and nothing else—16% of the time.) New codex note: now Kroot are strength 3, their weapons are AP5 in close combat, and they lost an attack. What did they gain? 1 point sniper round upgrades. We sniper now. Have fun taking out monstrous creatures and leaders.

==Gallery==
{{Promotions}}
<gallery>
Image:Kroot porn.JPG|Yes, this is how Kroot fuck.
Image:TauKroot.jpg|Note which part of that fine piece of blueberry the Kroot is groping.
Image:YesIagree.png|They also have quite a way with words.
</gallery>

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[[Category:Tau]]
[[Category:Warhammer 40,000]]
[[Category:Xenos]]