2d4chan - User contributions [en]

Furry

2016-07-18T15:08:44Z

2604:6000:1407:8035:C91F:D5E6:1B98:F554: /* Furries on /tg/ */

{{promotions}}
{{heresy}}
[[Image:BAWWW.jpg|right|thumb|Fig. a: This furry is not making any friends here.]]

''"I have run with the tigers and I know wild beasts better than the priests. Animals are neither gods nor fiends, but men in their way without the lust and greed of man."''

- Kull, Exile of Atlantis

'''Furries''' are people who are (often obsessive) fans of anthropomorphic animals. Some furries are merely keen on Disney, the Rats of NIMH), [[My Little Pony]], or Usagi Yojimbo; at the other end of the spectrum lie the Otherkin, people who [[What|genuinely believe]] that they are animals or dragons trapped inside human bodies. Some furries make and wear fursuits in an attempt to resemble their avatars in real life; such efforts nearly always fail miserably and make the participants look ridiculous.

The Furry community is based mostly in meritocratic elitism, with good [[drawfags]] in the upper levels of their social pyramid and the average Disney/Warner Brothers' animation fanboy in the lowest. Drama, misanthropy and other emo behaviors are very common in the hierarchy, often representing humankind as sociopathic or genocidal in their literary works or comics. Many furry comics have a homosexual or bisexual theme, not unlike anime. Many are avid supporters of the LGBT movement, being as they are part of it. (<strike>Slight note: Most of the LGBT want nothing to do with furries. Someone just purge them already.</strike> Correction: Much of the LGBT community doesn't care about furries, barring those involved in the fandom, unless they are sticking their metaphorical/literal dicks/vag in their face, in which case, I think anyone would want to make a hasty retreat.)

The type of furry most commonly referred to by /tg/ and 4chan is the erotic furry, also known as furvert, which is a specific sexual fetish for anthropomorphic animals. Erotic furries are fond of [[cybering|cybersex]], which they refer to as "yiffing", supposedly for the sound a fox makes while copulating. There are fewer erotic furries in the furry community than the average fa/tg/uy believes, but by the same token there are more of them than the average furry will admit to, depending on the furry in question. This type of furry is considered by 4chan, out of all possible factions, as the vilest and most nauseating form of [[heresy]] in all of existence, with only the ultimate [[Exterminatus|Banhammer]] as the solution.

[[File:Unconventional Armour.jpg|250px|right|thumb|/tg/ bitches about anthropomorphic animals all the time in sci-fi and fantasy settings, yet they have a insatiable fetish for cat women in skimpy armour. The irony is real.]]

Antipathy toward furries on /tg/ and 4chan runs high principally due to a profound weariness with thin-skinned furries complaining of persecution. If you are a furry and feel the need to talk about it, the best way to survive on /tg/ is to admit from the outset that you are a sick bastard and that you don't expect anyone to praise you for it (Addendum: Since 40k has very little to do with the fandom, it's generally safe to just not refer to yourself as one, lest ye call down the collective nerd rage of the fa/tg/uys on you, as shown in fig. a.) Furry threads make for very effective [[troll]]ing experience, especially if erotic furry art is involved.

In a somewhat ironic twist, /tg/'s burning hatred for furries is what allowed /tg/ to come into being; [[Warhammer Wednesday]] was created as a direct response to furries attempting to spam /b/ every day of the week. The popularity of this day caught Moot's attention, leading to the creation of the /tg/ board.

Furries have their own RPGs, most notably ''[[Ironclaw]]'', and its Asian themed companion book ''Jadeclaw'', as well as ''[[Furry Pirates]]'' and ''[[Albedo]]''.

/tg/, /v/, /x/ and other boards (not really /b/, because half of them are furfags anyways) have a profound hatred for all things furry and will [[Exterminatus|rage, sage, kill, maim and ultimately burn]] the thread into the desolate wastelands of 404. (Any thread you may happen to see featuring monstergirls, centaurs, gnolls, or other sexualized sapient creatures is merely a figment of your imagination.)

Note: some furfags like to take it to the extreme and have recently tried to take /tg/ for themselves, only to have to resort to copious amounts of samefagging after the majority of fa/tg/uys got bored of saging their threads into oblivion. It is also theorized that furfags that invade /tg/ usually come from the bottomless pit of horror called tgchan.

[[image:Dragons on a car 1.jpg|thumb|right|Example of an erotic scalie fantasy.]]

Scalies are anthropomorphic creatures of the reptile and amphibian variety. As furries are nicknamed such for their humanoid shape covered in fur, scalies tend to have a coating of scales much like the animals they represent. However, some scalies, including draconids, have very light or no true scales, but flesh more like a human's.

Scalies are also furry fans with a preference for lizard, reptile, dragon and dinosaur characters and themes. It is also a self-moniker for the users of alt.fan.dragons, a Usenet discussion group for all things drakōn. They are not to be confused with [[dragonborn]] (because they don't ask to be fucked and raped constantly).

==Yiffing==
{{heresy}}
Sex between furries. Most commonly used outside the fandom in the form of "Yiff in Hell", indicating to public erotic furries that they or their sexual practices are not welcome in a given locale. Furries sexual interaction is a field what can be considered the greatest catalog of paraphilia in the net, reaching any possible excessive sexual deviation known by modern psychology.

Good places to yiff include: HELL, HELL, and, HELL. And the occasional [[Warp]]. Bad places to yiff include: everywhere else.

[[File:Damn Furry DMs.JPG|thumb|right| A furry DM in action.]]

==Satan==
His kingdom of Hell has been ruined by all the influx of furries. The influx of them drove the immortal Prince of Darkness into attempting suicide (and succeeding), and he was replaced with the [[Slaanesh|Prince of Pleasure]]. Turns out Chaos accepts pretty much anyone.

==You might be considered a furry (by some) if...==

As the only attribute really required to be considered a furry is an interest in anthropomorphic animals (def: having human characteristics, such as human speech, clothes, etc) you might be a furry if you are identify with and/or a devoted fan of:

*[[Beastmen]]
*[[Skaven]]
*[[Minotaur]]
*[[Centaur]]
*[[Satyr]]
*Some subspecies of [[Demon]]

(Clarification: Just because you are interested in any of these does NOT force you to become a furry. It's a fandom like anime is. You can like something and not associate with the ravening horde of crazy fanboys/girls.)

==Things That are Not Furry==

[[Image:Furry chart.jpg|thumb|right|<s>100% is fine too.</s>{{BLAM|HERESY!}}{{BLAM}}]]

[[Image:Cheesy.jpg|thumb|right|DANGEROUSLY CHEESY]]

Distaste for furries often backfires on /tg/ when overly zealous anons cannot find any furries to abuse and turn their attention to people involved in innocuous practices. In particular, you should check yourself if you find you are calling someone a furry for any of the following:

*Playing [[Bunnies and Burrows]] (without masturbating).
*Discussing ''Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and Other Strangeness''.
*Watching Disney movies and other movies with anthropomorphic characters <strike>(without masturbating)</strike>(Disney movies may cause anthropomorphic animals to pique your interest, but does not, by default, MAKE you a furry)
*[[Monstergirls]]. Suggesting they count as furry to any veteran of /tg/ and/or /d/ will result in your typical fa/tg/uy [[Eversor|broiling over with rage and fucking your shit up]]. The fact that these are, in fact, furry is '''irony'''. You've been warned.
*Playing [[gnoll]]s, [[minotaur]]s, [[Ork]]s, [[kobolds]] and in some extreme cases [[Eldar|elves]] (lol see what we did there).
*Discussing something such as ''Ruby Quest'', which primarily has given the characters animal features in order to easily differentiate between them within its simple style.
*[[Werewolves]] as, despite the frequent overlap, they are not furry by themselves.
*Playing [[Space Wolves]].

Dispute rages over what exactly constitutes furry. There are two major schools of thought on the subject. [[Skub|One holds that catgirls and other essentially near-hairless human characters with only one or two animal features]] (such as ears, minute resemblance of claws/fur on the body or a tail) [[Skub|are not furry, and the boundary of furry is only breached when you start sighting other obviously animal characteristics]] (such as an altered skeletal structure, a face that resembles an actual animal and full-body-fur) (this does not stop trolls from calling [[Horo]] furry, however). On the other hand the second school of thought maintains that nobody fucking cares. There are hints of a still forming third school developing around the idea of [[Exterminatus|exterminating]] all of them and let [[Gary Gygax]] decide which ones are and which aren't.

==Furries on /tg/==
If furries are brought up at all, this is mostly in the context of fantasy roleplaying games that feature anthropomorphic species like Gnolls and Kobolds, etc. As mentioned above, this is a gray area where playing one of these characters does not necessarily mean one is a furry; even so, accusations can still be made, since genuine furries can use playing a canon furry species as a smokescreen for creating their [[magical realm]]. The key is to figure out ahead of time whether the player in question cares more about roleplaying an adventurer than roleplaying a sexual fetish.

With regards to WH40k, there's less ambiguity. The Imperium's stance on non-humans is [[heresy|quite clear]]. Yet despite all this, you do have the occasional furry try to slip something in that, by all rights, should ordinarily result in [[Exterminatus]] right from the get-go. Because of this, furries have been classified as [[Extra Heresy]]. See the [[Fur Heresy]] for one such example.

===Flare===
Originally introduced to /tg/ by some creepy furfag that would spam her picture in [[drawfag]] threads constantly, Flare was since kidnapped from her creator to receive an extreme makeover in the hands of /tg/: Hated by absolutely everyone, she had to endure constant abuse and fighting ever since childhood, turning her into a sociopathic fuckup. Posting an image of old Flare with or without text used to be the easiest form of trolling on all of /tg/ - Not even [[4e]] could have elicited as much blind rage from the board - but the new Flare has since cut the worst edge out of it. More importantly, what /tg/ did to her is bugging the shit out of the original flarefag, which is awesome.

There is no art of her anywhere except the original image and the ones that Drawfags have made. Trolls sometimes refer to Flare as a mascot of /tg/, but this is so unthinkably wrong and horrifying that you are advised to stop thinking about the possibility.

===Chakat===
Like Flare, this is an imported concept that /tg/ rapidly grew to hate. The short story is that [[Chakat]]s are a race of hermaphroditic furry centaurs [[Mary Sue|who are super amazing at everything and everyone wants to fuck them]], and engage in [[FATAL|metric fucktons of sexual fetishes including incest]]. And if you're not sexually attracted to them, then you're a horrible person and [[rape|they'll ''make'' you love them]]. In short, they're everything wrong with furries in one package. Originally a Star Trek fanfic race, they've since attempted [[Chakats Meet the Hammer of the Emperor|invade]] every other sci-fi franchise despite being hated even by other furries. So if one of your players attempts to play a Chakat character, you'll know what to expect. On the other hand, with a few tweaks they'd make for a great villain...

==Gallery==

<gallery>
Image:Animalabuse.jpg|Why any sane person should hate furries.
Image:Geek-hierarchy-pic15.jpg|Furry [[LARP]]ers.
Image:Dnd.jpg| Furcadia, an infamous furry graphical MUD.
Image:D&d_beasts__senmurv_gay_pride.jpg|A suspiciously furry D&D creature.
Image:Exterminatus.jpg|This is what /tg/ actually believes.
Image:DeathToTheFurries.jpg|[[/b/|/b/rothers]] do not like any more than [[/tg/|fa/tg/uys]] do.
Image:SuiseisororitasHQ.JPG
Image:Get_furry_out_of_here.jpg
Image:Anonymarines_vs_furries.jpg
Image:One_wing_troll_dragon.jpg|Flare before
Image:True Flare.jpg|Flare after
Image:Flarebanned.jpg|No mods on /tg/ you say?
Image:Flaresprons_anonib.jpg
Image:RatAssMacro.png
File:Space_wolves_sergeant_by_GordonFreeguy.png|Not sure if heresy...
File:Art.png
File:Animated_yiff_furry_marines_1211613516571.gif|HERESY IN THE EXTREME
File:5_years_later_still_ruining_by_flyingdebris-d488kxr.jpg|Five years later - the war is still going strong.
File:Gnoll.jpg|Another awesome fantasy race is consumed by the fur-tide.
File:Dr. Steinman Parody.png|That's what happens when you <del>do drugs</del> draw furry porn for years. It screws up your mind.
</gallery>

==See Also==
* [[Beastmen]] - When furries become violent [[Chaos]] worshipers.
* [[Confrontation]]
* [[Fur Heresy]]
* ''[[Furry_Pirates|Furry Pirates]]''
* ''[[Ironclaw|Iron Claw]]''
* [[Chakat]], something most furries prefer, understandably, to not be associated with.
* https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h1Dyqas6Sm8
* [[Sergal]], like Chakats, a homebrewed race that is still based on humanoid animals (in this case a sort of wolf/shark/lizard mix).
* [[Centaur]]s, although people argue if they are furries or [[monstergirl]]s.
* [[Minotaur]]s, which like centaurs get claimed by both sides.
* [[Catfolk]], who despite being furries are somehow more /tg/-acceptable than [[catgirl]]s.
* [[Lupin]]s, an actual D&D race of anthro wolves who went from Renaissance French swashbucklers in [[Red Steel]] to pseudo-Native American werewolf hunters who ride around on giant wolves.
* [[Ratfolk]], another race marginalized for "official furriness!"
* [[Gnolls]], anthro hyenas who mostly manage to avoid the furry connections
* [[Lizardfolk]], because some furries prefer scales.
* [[Dragonborn]], who really appeal to furries.
* [[Kobolds]], an anthro lizard race who manage to be popular on /tg/ despite being anthro.
[[Category:Furry]]
[[Category:Not related]]
[[Category:RAGE]]

Furry

2016-07-18T15:00:37Z

2604:6000:1407:8035:C91F:D5E6:1B98:F554: /* Furries on /tg/ */

{{promotions}}
{{heresy}}
[[Image:BAWWW.jpg|right|thumb|Fig. a: This furry is not making any friends here.]]

''"I have run with the tigers and I know wild beasts better than the priests. Animals are neither gods nor fiends, but men in their way without the lust and greed of man."''

- Kull, Exile of Atlantis

'''Furries''' are people who are (often obsessive) fans of anthropomorphic animals. Some furries are merely keen on Disney, the Rats of NIMH), [[My Little Pony]], or Usagi Yojimbo; at the other end of the spectrum lie the Otherkin, people who [[What|genuinely believe]] that they are animals or dragons trapped inside human bodies. Some furries make and wear fursuits in an attempt to resemble their avatars in real life; such efforts nearly always fail miserably and make the participants look ridiculous.

The Furry community is based mostly in meritocratic elitism, with good [[drawfags]] in the upper levels of their social pyramid and the average Disney/Warner Brothers' animation fanboy in the lowest. Drama, misanthropy and other emo behaviors are very common in the hierarchy, often representing humankind as sociopathic or genocidal in their literary works or comics. Many furry comics have a homosexual or bisexual theme, not unlike anime. Many are avid supporters of the LGBT movement, being as they are part of it. (<strike>Slight note: Most of the LGBT want nothing to do with furries. Someone just purge them already.</strike> Correction: Much of the LGBT community doesn't care about furries, barring those involved in the fandom, unless they are sticking their metaphorical/literal dicks/vag in their face, in which case, I think anyone would want to make a hasty retreat.)

The type of furry most commonly referred to by /tg/ and 4chan is the erotic furry, also known as furvert, which is a specific sexual fetish for anthropomorphic animals. Erotic furries are fond of [[cybering|cybersex]], which they refer to as "yiffing", supposedly for the sound a fox makes while copulating. There are fewer erotic furries in the furry community than the average fa/tg/uy believes, but by the same token there are more of them than the average furry will admit to, depending on the furry in question. This type of furry is considered by 4chan, out of all possible factions, as the vilest and most nauseating form of [[heresy]] in all of existence, with only the ultimate [[Exterminatus|Banhammer]] as the solution.

[[File:Unconventional Armour.jpg|250px|right|thumb|/tg/ bitches about anthropomorphic animals all the time in sci-fi and fantasy settings, yet they have a insatiable fetish for cat women in skimpy armour. The irony is real.]]

Antipathy toward furries on /tg/ and 4chan runs high principally due to a profound weariness with thin-skinned furries complaining of persecution. If you are a furry and feel the need to talk about it, the best way to survive on /tg/ is to admit from the outset that you are a sick bastard and that you don't expect anyone to praise you for it (Addendum: Since 40k has very little to do with the fandom, it's generally safe to just not refer to yourself as one, lest ye call down the collective nerd rage of the fa/tg/uys on you, as shown in fig. a.) Furry threads make for very effective [[troll]]ing experience, especially if erotic furry art is involved.

In a somewhat ironic twist, /tg/'s burning hatred for furries is what allowed /tg/ to come into being; [[Warhammer Wednesday]] was created as a direct response to furries attempting to spam /b/ every day of the week. The popularity of this day caught Moot's attention, leading to the creation of the /tg/ board.

Furries have their own RPGs, most notably ''[[Ironclaw]]'', and its Asian themed companion book ''Jadeclaw'', as well as ''[[Furry Pirates]]'' and ''[[Albedo]]''.

/tg/, /v/, /x/ and other boards (not really /b/, because half of them are furfags anyways) have a profound hatred for all things furry and will [[Exterminatus|rage, sage, kill, maim and ultimately burn]] the thread into the desolate wastelands of 404. (Any thread you may happen to see featuring monstergirls, centaurs, gnolls, or other sexualized sapient creatures is merely a figment of your imagination.)

Note: some furfags like to take it to the extreme and have recently tried to take /tg/ for themselves, only to have to resort to copious amounts of samefagging after the majority of fa/tg/uys got bored of saging their threads into oblivion. It is also theorized that furfags that invade /tg/ usually come from the bottomless pit of horror called tgchan.

[[image:Dragons on a car 1.jpg|thumb|right|Example of an erotic scalie fantasy.]]

Scalies are anthropomorphic creatures of the reptile and amphibian variety. As furries are nicknamed such for their humanoid shape covered in fur, scalies tend to have a coating of scales much like the animals they represent. However, some scalies, including draconids, have very light or no true scales, but flesh more like a human's.

Scalies are also furry fans with a preference for lizard, reptile, dragon and dinosaur characters and themes. It is also a self-moniker for the users of alt.fan.dragons, a Usenet discussion group for all things drakōn. They are not to be confused with [[dragonborn]] (because they don't ask to be fucked and raped constantly).

==Yiffing==
{{heresy}}
Sex between furries. Most commonly used outside the fandom in the form of "Yiff in Hell", indicating to public erotic furries that they or their sexual practices are not welcome in a given locale. Furries sexual interaction is a field what can be considered the greatest catalog of paraphilia in the net, reaching any possible excessive sexual deviation known by modern psychology.

Good places to yiff include: HELL, HELL, and, HELL. And the occasional [[Warp]]. Bad places to yiff include: everywhere else.

[[File:Damn Furry DMs.JPG|thumb|right| A furry DM in action.]]

==Satan==
His kingdom of Hell has been ruined by all the influx of furries. The influx of them drove the immortal Prince of Darkness into attempting suicide (and succeeding), and he was replaced with the [[Slaanesh|Prince of Pleasure]]. Turns out Chaos accepts pretty much anyone.

==You might be considered a furry (by some) if...==

As the only attribute really required to be considered a furry is an interest in anthropomorphic animals (def: having human characteristics, such as human speech, clothes, etc) you might be a furry if you are identify with and/or a devoted fan of:

*[[Beastmen]]
*[[Skaven]]
*[[Minotaur]]
*[[Centaur]]
*[[Satyr]]
*Some subspecies of [[Demon]]

(Clarification: Just because you are interested in any of these does NOT force you to become a furry. It's a fandom like anime is. You can like something and not associate with the ravening horde of crazy fanboys/girls.)

==Things That are Not Furry==

[[Image:Furry chart.jpg|thumb|right|<s>100% is fine too.</s>{{BLAM|HERESY!}}{{BLAM}}]]

[[Image:Cheesy.jpg|thumb|right|DANGEROUSLY CHEESY]]

Distaste for furries often backfires on /tg/ when overly zealous anons cannot find any furries to abuse and turn their attention to people involved in innocuous practices. In particular, you should check yourself if you find you are calling someone a furry for any of the following:

*Playing [[Bunnies and Burrows]] (without masturbating).
*Discussing ''Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and Other Strangeness''.
*Watching Disney movies and other movies with anthropomorphic characters <strike>(without masturbating)</strike>(Disney movies may cause anthropomorphic animals to pique your interest, but does not, by default, MAKE you a furry)
*[[Monstergirls]]. Suggesting they count as furry to any veteran of /tg/ and/or /d/ will result in your typical fa/tg/uy [[Eversor|broiling over with rage and fucking your shit up]]. The fact that these are, in fact, furry is '''irony'''. You've been warned.
*Playing [[gnoll]]s, [[minotaur]]s, [[Ork]]s, [[kobolds]] and in some extreme cases [[Eldar|elves]] (lol see what we did there).
*Discussing something such as ''Ruby Quest'', which primarily has given the characters animal features in order to easily differentiate between them within its simple style.
*[[Werewolves]] as, despite the frequent overlap, they are not furry by themselves.
*Playing [[Space Wolves]].

Dispute rages over what exactly constitutes furry. There are two major schools of thought on the subject. [[Skub|One holds that catgirls and other essentially near-hairless human characters with only one or two animal features]] (such as ears, minute resemblance of claws/fur on the body or a tail) [[Skub|are not furry, and the boundary of furry is only breached when you start sighting other obviously animal characteristics]] (such as an altered skeletal structure, a face that resembles an actual animal and full-body-fur) (this does not stop trolls from calling [[Horo]] furry, however). On the other hand the second school of thought maintains that nobody fucking cares. There are hints of a still forming third school developing around the idea of [[Exterminatus|exterminating]] all of them and let [[Gary Gygax]] decide which ones are and which aren't.

==Furries on /tg/==
If furries are brought up at all, this is mostly in the context of fantasy roleplaying games that feature anthropomorphic species like Gnolls and Kobolds, etc. As mentioned above, this is a gray area where playing one of these characters does not necessarily mean one is a furry; even so, accusations can still be made, since genuine furries can use playing a canon furry species as a smokescreen for creating their [[magical realm]]. The key is to figure out ahead of time whether the player in question cares more about roleplaying an adventurer than roleplaying a sexual fetish.

With regards to WH40k, there's less ambiguity. The Imperium's stance on non-humans is [[heresy|quite clear]]. Yet despite all this, you do have the occasional furry try to slip something in that, by all rights, should ordinarily result in [[Exterminatus]] right from the get-go. Because of this, furries have been classified as [[Extra Heresy]]. See the [[Fur Heresy]] for one such example.

===Flare===
Originally introduced to /tg/ by some creepy furfag that would spam her picture in [[drawfag]] threads constantly, Flare was since kidnapped from her creator to receive an extreme makeover in the hands of /tg/: Hated by absolutely everyone, she had to endure constant abuse and fighting ever since childhood, turning her into a sociopathic fuckup. Posting an image of old Flare with or without text used to be the easiest form of trolling on all of /tg/ - Not even [[4e]] could have elicited as much blind rage from the board - but the new Flare has since cut the worst edge out of it. More importantly, what /tg/ did to her is bugging the shit out of the original flarefag, which is awesome.

There is no art of her anywhere except the original image and the ones that Drawfags have made. Trolls sometimes refer to Flare as a mascot of /tg/, but this is so unthinkably wrong and horrifying that you are advised to stop thinking about the possibility.

===Chakat===
Like Flare, this is an imported concept that /tg/ rapidly grew to hate. The short story is that [[Chakat]]s are a race of hermaphroditic furry centaurs [[Mary Sue|who are super amazing at everything and everyone wants to fuck them]], and engage in [[FATAL|metric fucktons of sexual fetishes including incest]]. And if you're not sexually attracted to them, then you're a horrible person and [[rape|they'll ''make'' you love them]]. In short, they're everything wrong with furries in one package. Originally a Star Trek fanfic race, they've since attempted invade every other sci-fi franchise despite being hated even by other furries. So if one of your players attempts to play a Chakat character, you'll know what to expect. On the other hand, with a few tweaks they'd make for a great villain...

==Gallery==

<gallery>
Image:Animalabuse.jpg|Why any sane person should hate furries.
Image:Geek-hierarchy-pic15.jpg|Furry [[LARP]]ers.
Image:Dnd.jpg| Furcadia, an infamous furry graphical MUD.
Image:D&d_beasts__senmurv_gay_pride.jpg|A suspiciously furry D&D creature.
Image:Exterminatus.jpg|This is what /tg/ actually believes.
Image:DeathToTheFurries.jpg|[[/b/|/b/rothers]] do not like any more than [[/tg/|fa/tg/uys]] do.
Image:SuiseisororitasHQ.JPG
Image:Get_furry_out_of_here.jpg
Image:Anonymarines_vs_furries.jpg
Image:One_wing_troll_dragon.jpg|Flare before
Image:True Flare.jpg|Flare after
Image:Flarebanned.jpg|No mods on /tg/ you say?
Image:Flaresprons_anonib.jpg
Image:RatAssMacro.png
File:Space_wolves_sergeant_by_GordonFreeguy.png|Not sure if heresy...
File:Art.png
File:Animated_yiff_furry_marines_1211613516571.gif|HERESY IN THE EXTREME
File:5_years_later_still_ruining_by_flyingdebris-d488kxr.jpg|Five years later - the war is still going strong.
File:Gnoll.jpg|Another awesome fantasy race is consumed by the fur-tide.
File:Dr. Steinman Parody.png|That's what happens when you <del>do drugs</del> draw furry porn for years. It screws up your mind.
</gallery>

==See Also==
* [[Beastmen]] - When furries become violent [[Chaos]] worshipers.
* [[Confrontation]]
* [[Fur Heresy]]
* ''[[Furry_Pirates|Furry Pirates]]''
* ''[[Ironclaw|Iron Claw]]''
* [[Chakat]], something most furries prefer, understandably, to not be associated with.
* https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h1Dyqas6Sm8
* [[Sergal]], like Chakats, a homebrewed race that is still based on humanoid animals (in this case a sort of wolf/shark/lizard mix).
* [[Centaur]]s, although people argue if they are furries or [[monstergirl]]s.
* [[Minotaur]]s, which like centaurs get claimed by both sides.
* [[Catfolk]], who despite being furries are somehow more /tg/-acceptable than [[catgirl]]s.
* [[Lupin]]s, an actual D&D race of anthro wolves who went from Renaissance French swashbucklers in [[Red Steel]] to pseudo-Native American werewolf hunters who ride around on giant wolves.
* [[Ratfolk]], another race marginalized for "official furriness!"
* [[Gnolls]], anthro hyenas who mostly manage to avoid the furry connections
* [[Lizardfolk]], because some furries prefer scales.
* [[Dragonborn]], who really appeal to furries.
* [[Kobolds]], an anthro lizard race who manage to be popular on /tg/ despite being anthro.
[[Category:Furry]]
[[Category:Not related]]
[[Category:RAGE]]

If the Emperor had a Text-to-Speech Device

2016-07-18T02:48:04Z

2604:6000:1407:8035:C91F:D5E6:1B98:F554: /* Adversaries */

{{awesome}}
{{template:Spoilers}}

[[File:If-the-emperor.png|500px|right|thumb|Prepare yourself for pure undiluted WIN!]]

'''The Lord:'''

''"You've nothing more to say to me? You come but to complain unendingly? Is never aught right to your mind?"''

'''Mephistopheles:'''

''"No, Lord! All is still downright bad, I find."''

- Goethe's Faust, Prologue in Heaven.

A Youtube series created by Bruva Alfabusa, the show follows the exploits of Emprah himself in his quest to bring the Imperium of Man to its former glory, helped by the captain of the Custodes "Little Kitten", Magnus (now forgiven and with soul) and a hilarious cast of other major 40k characters. The series has become a complete success, mostly by poking fun on many of the memes, traditions and quirks of the 40k universe and the fandom but also by some very awesome scenes and, of course, great music.

Most fans agree that, while a wild and very unserious take on the 40k universe, the plot itself isn't actually that outlandish (apart from the [[Ultramarines]] capturing [[Magnus the Red]]...). If the Emps would wake up, it's pretty much a given that he would remove the worst parts of the Inquisition as some of the first things, while probably being an ass, as he always was. The unsure part is if the Emps would have learned from his 10,000 years of mistakes, which the series believes he has, deep inside. Doesn't help his [[Rage|temper]] though.

The so-called "TTS-verse" also includes Karl the Deranged's series [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5enLrHSMuIs Chaos Descends], and Eliphas the Inheritor's [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o1cXYan0NQA Behemoth] trilogy. "Specials" are slated for story content that takes place outside the throne room.

==Dramatis Personae==

Starting off with a few characters, the series has evolved to encompass a fuckton of major and minor characters, with their own small arcs and all. It's not quite [[Order of the Stick|OotS]] level, but it's getting there.

===Team Emperor===

[[Image:Pleased Emprah.jpg|thumb|right]]
*'''[[Emperor of Mankind]]''': The Emprah, who's now able to verbally communicate with people after Techpriests installed a text-to-speech device on his throne. You know how Rouboute Guilliman is a 'jerk with a heart of gold'? Well the Emperor is a massive frothing plasteel dickbag with tourettes, with a heart of gold/platinum alloy studded with diamonds. Is currently planning to rebuild the Imperium after hearing the clusterfuck of stories from his Captain-General caretaker. He also has a pet [[Centurion Squad|Centurion]] (who turns out to be rather important), which he finds adorable, while finding [[Dreadknight]]s abominable. He is a jerk, frequently insulting the Captain General with little reason other than he can (and because it's funny), and dialogue with Magnus implies he's always been a prick. Nonetheless he is ultimately a sympathetic character who wanted to create a better future for humanity and the comedic outrage he displays at all the bad news he gets is justified given how he frequently hears about costly victories that could have been avoided if the men in charge were less incompetent and how the Imperium has been destroying itself (usually because of the Inquisition). The Emperor has a new plan for defeating Chaos after the "starve them out by getting rid of religion" plan didn't work, but like before, he refuses to tell anyone what that plan is (although this time around, it's apparently not because he doesn't trust anyone, but because he doesn't want to spoil the surprise).

[[Image:Sad Kitten.jpg|thumb|right]]
*''' Custodes Captain-General (aka Kitten)''': Captain-General of the [[Adeptus Custodes]] and the only Custode who appears to have retained his sanity after the near-death of the Emperor, and for that matter one of the few sane humans in the Imperium. He serves as both the Emperor's personal caretaker and assistant, and pretty much the only person he regularly talks to and his main link to the outside world. Generally the only person the Emperor trusts and treats like a son, albeit constantly berating him whenever he does something stupid, or because he just feels like it. He also seriously hates [[Tau]]. One episode implies that it is because [[Shadowsun]] spurned him for the Greater Good (and also because he was a bit... fixated on the extremely y-onic shape of her nose), something he furiously and tearfully declares ''must'' be non-canon. He is named ''Little Kitten'' by his fellow Custodes, for "purring his way so far into their ranks", but his real name is a long seemingly nonsensical word salad supposedly based on his accomplishments... But given how he's been stuck in the palace for the last ten thousand years said accomplishments include things like "Goldilocks-Sunshine-Graham-Corncob". His frequent emotional outbursts despite the supposed emotionless state of the Custodes is intentional, and played for humor. After being forced out of the position of caretaker by his fellow Custodes, Kitten fell into a depression, to which Magnus ominously is taking advantage of by making Kitten his ally in making the Imperium great again and totally not get back at the old man. So far all he has done was kill a bunch of Lacrymoles that were impersonating the High Lords of Terra.

*'''[[Magnus the Red]]''': The closest thing to a sane person besides the Captain-General (who plays the straight man depending on the situation). Retrieved from wherever within the Warp by the sheer plot-armor-powered efforts of [[Cato Sicarius]] and then brought to the Golden Throne, followed by the Emperor bullying [[Tzeentch]] in order to steal back Magnus' soul. Touched, he somehow managed to forgive the Emperor (sort of) and decided to help the Emps with his plan to fix the Imperium, but Emps being a jerk to him is starting to test his patience. The shiny new bike he was given helped with their reconciliation, though just how well his apparent heel-face turn has actually stuck is up for debate at best. The first thing he did with the bike was run over a bunch of kids on the street, possible foreshadowing? He may not be actively working for Chaos anymore, but he also quickly runs out of patience with his father and is attempting to fix the Imperium without his help, partly because he has serious doubts about his current sanity (which is kind of justified), and partly just to spite him. Magnus turns into a [[neckbeard]]ed daemon cyclops [http://wh40k.lexicanum.com/mediawiki/images/9/9a/MagnusEpic.jpg that is a bit reminiscent of his old model back in] [[Epic]], whenever he enters [[rage]] mode - usually prompted by any mention of [[furries|space wolves]].

*'''[[Rogal Dorn]]:''' Primarch of the [[Imperial Fists]]. Is revealed as the Emperor's personal Centurion, with whom he had nightly cuddling sessions prior to his reveal. He came out of hiding after Kitten brought up the topic of discussing the [[Space Wolves]], where he vehemently suggested not to discuss the wolves to prevent Magnus from spazzing out. His extreme bluntness is shown to be less because he is an asshole and more because he is extremely oblivious and literal-minded, possibly due to using a fucking chainsword to scratch his head. Before his disappearance he used to consult his "magic pain glove" until his hand fell off. Despite his eccentricities and his inability to understand sarcasm, he can still make surprisingly lucid observations, such as that the end times are coming, and that not even the Chaos Gods will survive the potential end of all life in the galaxy. He even manages to, perhaps unwittingly, deliver one of the sickest burns yet on the Emperor, leaving him speechless. Actually, nearly every line he spouts is full of unintentional hilarity.

===Imperials (So sorta good guys)===

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*'''The Pillar-stodes (Wamuudes, Custodisi, Karstodes)''': Some of the Emperor's personal companions from the Great Crusade days. After his interment into the Golden Throne, the rest of the Custodes have shed their armor as a sign of mourning. This, however, has also caused them to become fabulous hedonists (although somehow not to a Slaaneshi-tier extreme, they actually despise slaaneshi daemons the most, much to the Emperor's confusion), which greatly disturbs the Emperor. They also have no respect for their Captain General and don't even seem to remember that he's their superior. They constantly slip innuendos into their conversations, much to the discomfort of everyone involved. Except for Rogal; he's too literal-minded to notice. A running gag with them is that whenever the Pillarstodes come into a scene, they would dynamically jump in from nowhere with their own [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XUhVCoTsBaM personal theme song]. The three Pillarstodes appearance is based on the Pillar Men from [[JoJo's Bizarre Adventure]]: Battle Tendency; a group of fabulously well-built, half-naked Aztec vampire demigods seeking immortality.
*'''Diavodes''': Another crazy Jojo-Custodes, he appeared out of the blue and asked Kitten and Magnus if they knew who he was, and was content to hear that they didn't. Once alone, he started to laugh maniacally, declaring that soon the new Emperor would be him, Diavodes!

[[Image:High Lords Text.jpg|thumb|right]]
*'''The [[High Lords of Terra]]''': The people responsible for running the Imperium itself. Despite this the majority of the High Lords never really discuss or do anything to the betterment of the Imperium and just act senile, once planning to outlaw breathing for everyone but them. For this reason Magnus wants them all dead and handle governing the Imperium directly, but Kitten may have succeeded in convincing them not to fuck over the Imperium so much. Apparently they High Lords are commonly recruited from the Old Folks' planet, a retirement home so terrible that the High Lords have banned ever saying its name. There are currently 5 High Lords featured, aside from the Captain-General.¨
[[Image:High Lords 2.jpg|thumb|right]]
**'''[[Ecclesiarchy|Ecclesiarch]] Decius XXIII''': The only non-senile High Lord aside from the Captain General, who legitimately takes his post seriously, even standing up to Fyodor and forbidding him to shed a single drop of blood from Terra's population (which Fyodor circumvented by using incendiary weaponry). For not screwing up the Emperor's plan, not being an overzealous bag of insanity, and rushing to try to save the Emperor when Fyodor stormed Terra's Palace he is allowed to stay leader of the Ecclesiarchy, even as the Emps is disbanding it/just changing every mention of '''God'''-Emperor to '''Man'''-Emperor, due to the fact that he and those who obeyed Emprah now are in charge of reforming the Imperium from the craphole it has sink in. [[Space Marines|Loyalty to the man rather than the word]] finally payed off. Just about everyone mocks him for his hat, which gets limp or...stiff depending on his emotional state. Hat Boners?!? [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Pq-6aj9sNvo He proved that despite the crap others give him, he can make some pretty rousing speeches on the fly].
**'''Fabricator-General of Mars''': The head of the Adeptus Mechanicus. Is so old that his voice stutters every time he speaks like a broken version of Stephen Hawking in addition to always speaking in little tunes. Constantly does nothing but insult his fellow High Lords for being made of flesh and recommend they swap out their fleshy bits for mechanical augmentations. According to other Magos, the Fabricator-General is also a massive junkie and party animal, and he invites the other high lords for margaritas on Mars.
**'''Grand Provost Marshal''': Head of the Adeptus Arbites, who does nothing but propose to make everything illegal. [[Judge Dredd| HE IS THE LAW]].
**'''Master of the Administratum''': The head of the Imperial bureaucracy. A bit less inept than the rest of the high lords, he acts like your everyday senile grandfather.
**'''Commander Militant of the Imperial Guard''': The leader of the Imperial Guard. Doesn't do much, apart from comparing war to the good ol' days. Aware enough to know that the removal of minor luxuries (laxatives, breathing) may have detrimental effects on the Imperial Guard. [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fUrhqCkYwps Lays a sicknasty dilarius biznasty beat.]

===The Ultramarines===
*'''[[Marneus Calgar]]''': Chapter Master of the Ultramarines. He's currently depressed and frustrated at the state of the Ultramarines where they basically win everything (due to their plot armor) as well as their strict adherence to the Codex Astartes to the point that it's no longer fun anymore. Due to this, his mood is eternally grumpy, only made worse by Sicarius' constant gloating. He actually seems to care deeply for the men under his command as he get extremely pissed off when Sicarius put his marines at unnecessary risk to achieve another victory to inflate his reputation. He also appears in a flashback during the second [[Tyranid]] war in Ultramar, where he did battle with the Swarmlord. [https://youtu.be/cB79pnU2f2I?t=5m30s While he put up a valiant fight, he found that they were equally matched, and thus, declared it a draw.] Blatant hints point towards a deal he made with [[Matt Ward|something]] to give his Chapter win more victories (hinted to have begun during the Second Tyrannic War), which he deeply regrets.

*'''[[Cato Sicarius]]''': Current Captain of the Ultramarines 2nd company. His persona's played as Cato's canon need to be a glory hound and the embodiment of the Ultramarines' plot armor, turned up to eleven, where he only cares for his advancement in the ranks of the Ultramarines and not much else. He apparently undertook the mission to capture Magnus the Red. Alone. Without his gellar field turned on, and his survival at such mission greatly pissed off Calgar to no ends, who was hoping he would die. He is also very verbal about his intention to take the position of Chapter Master, which ''greatly'' upsets Calgar (as Cato's dialogues largely implies that he's better than him and wishes for his death), to the point where he threatens to perform an "Imperial Fisting" upon Sicarius with his Gauntlets if he continues such thoughts. He also has a very egotistical, effeminate voice that can only be described as "the love child of tinnitus and a jackhammer", and he always refers to himself in the third person. [https://youtu.be/bM8YGsAmeqE?t=1m56s It's goddamn hilarious.]

*'''[[Uriel Ventris]]''': Current Captain of the Ultramarines 4th company. He doesn't have a lot of development yet, but appears as a close friend of Calgar and is the only one who's noticed the Ultramarines' theme of somehow always completing utterly suicidal missions. He comes to realize that some unknown force is tampering with space and time to rewrite history,([https://youtu.be/eG82ruvH0jc?t=120 Probably has to do with an ''itsy bitsy little'' '''SHARD''']) covering up the Ultramarines past failures and playing up their successes to impossible levels, and starts to suspect that Calgar knows more about this than he's letting on.

*'''[[Roboute Guilliman]]''': The Emperor has regularly made a point of ordering the Custodes Captain-General to have him taken off life-support. Currently the only reason he's still alive is Kitten winning an epic duel in a children's card game against the Emperor. The result of his actions and the Codex Astartes horrifies his father. Going by previous cannon of Guilliman perhaps actually regenerating his wounds that supposedly killed hi, the Empra liekly wants the time stasis field deactivated so he can finally get off his fucking ass.

===The Salamanders===
*'''[[Vulkan]]:''' Primarch of the [[Salamanders]]. After the Ultramarines found the remaining artifacts of Vulkan in secret for the Salamanders, Vulkan returned to the chapter, where his return was greeted with great adulation (VUVUZELAS). He is notably quite crazy, and haunted by the ghost of Ferrus Manus. He speaks with a distinct African accent and loves friendship.

*'''[[Vulkan He'stan|He'stan]]''': Forgefather of the Salamanders. He is seen sleeping on an anvil on fire when Cato Sicarius delivered the remaining artifacts to the Salamanders, literally driving them through the wall of the fortress into the Forgefather's personal chambers. Thinking he found the artifacts in his sleep, he subsequently declares himself to be best forgefather.

===The Raven Guard===
*'''[[Corvus_Corax|Corvus Corax]]''': Primarch of the Raven Guard. Appears at the end of one of the episodes. He's currently brooding away (and possibly stuck)in some dark room guarded by Salamanders, while writing edgy poetry in his journal. Chances are Magnus and kitten are going to find him locked up in the Engine of Woes, seeing as he decalared they were travelling to Nocturne to use the "Engine of Woes", which fits Corax's Angsty personality.

===The Dark Angels===
*'''[[Azrael]]:''' Chapter Master of the [[Dark Angels]]. He's depicted as an overly paranoid wreck, obsessing about [[Cypher]], the [[Fallen Angels]] and constantly telling any non-inner circle member that reports to them that they're doing nothing suspicious and heretical.
*'''[[Belial]]:''' Grand Master of the Deathwing. His emo personality is hilariously turned to eleven whenever he perceives himself or his chapter as not being perfect, which is every waking second. This curiously allows him to become more reasonable than the rest of the Inner Circle. He has an effeminate yet whiny voice similar to Thurston Howell III.
*'''[[Asmodai]]:''' The Dark Angels' Master of Repentance (which basically means "Violent Murdering" to him). He has an intense personality with a voice reminiscent of your stereotypical 1980s cartoon villain. [https://youtu.be/M56aycpd9kA?t=19m55s REPENT, MOTHERFUCKER.]
*'''[[Watchers in the Dark|Watcher in the Dark]] (Called Snurko):''' A Watcher that accompanies Azrael, who is apparently the only one of its kind who can talk. It suddenly spoke of Cypher while in the presence of non inner-circle Angels, [https://youtu.be/M56aycpd9kA?t=17m48s prompting Azrael to hilariously beat the shit out of it.] His speech and mannerisms appears to be based off Orko from the He-man series.

===The Black Templars===
*'''Chaplain [[Grimaldus]]:''' Shows up in a filler short where he tries to ban the holiday of Sanguinala. The other Black Templars tell him he can't, prompting him to go to his bed and throw a loyalist tantrum.

===The Space <s>Wolves</s> Corgis===
*'''[[Leman Russ]]''': Primarch of the Space <s>Wolves</s> Corgis. Has been hiding in the Warp. Has a verbal staredown with Karamazov, then proceeds to relentlessly mock him while obsessing over wolves. He also gives a thorough dressing-down of the 3 branches of the Inquisition, as well as the Deathwatch, Tempestus Scions and Sisters of Battle accompanying them (delivering the infamous line "Daemons of Khorne are gonna eat ya out like ice cream sandwiches once your Red Rage begins!"). He even has his own version of the [[meme|Navy Seal Copypasta]]. Despite being a viking, he has a pseudo-Scottish accent. Magnus has accused him of being a furry. Is currently teaching the Inquisition how to survive in the Warp by turning them into a drunken mob, killing innocent daemons, angering Bloodthirsters, assaulting helpless Lords of Change, and cockblocking Daemonettes. (To death, literally!)

===The Grey Knights===
*'''[[Kaldor Draigo]]''': Makes a short appearance after Fyodor and the rest of his attack force was sent into the warp by Magnus. He's clearly gone batshit insane after so long in the warp. He pops all around Fyodor and annoys him, driving the Inquisitor to scream in annoyance. Later summoned by Kitten to handle Magnus' tantrum, which he does so in a split-second offscreen using inexplicable Mary Sue powers to defeat him.

===Adversaries===
*'''[[Abaddon the Despoiler]]''': Has yet to personally appear in the series, but has so far has been contacting various Chaos Champions to enlist their help with the next Black Crusade.
*'''[[Fulgrim]]''': Has yet to personally appear in the series, but appears to have already joined Abaddon in his plans. He makes his appearance as the person who called Lucius to get him to join Abaddon.
[[Image:Fyo-Yo.png|thumb|right]]
*'''Lord [[Inquisitor]] Fyodor Karamazov''': Inquisitor of the [[Ordo Hereticus]] and a colossal jerk even among inquisitors. When the Emperor disbanded the Inquisition, he went ballistic and led an entire crusade to Terra to purge what he thinks is heresy. Ended up in the Warp via Magnus for his troubles, after being trolled in a magnificent manner by being told he is a fragment of the Emperor. This was all [[Just As Planned|the Emperor's plan for sending out the message in the first place]], to lure in all the more destructive Inquisitors to get rid of them. He's not out of the game yet, though, and is determined to return to the Emperor. He has become substantially more crazy after Leman Russ' Warp Survival lessons.
[[Image:Domi.png|thumb|right]]
**''Dominique'': The sentient scribe servitor on Fyodor's Throne of Judgement. He comically makes fun of Fyodor on several occasions and generally breaks the serious atmosphere that the Lord Inquisitor tries to project. He also has a curious predilection for sandpaper cigarettes and a rapacious drug habit. Voiced by Gonzo the Great.
[[Image:Mall.png|thumb|right]]
*'''[[Ordo Malleus]] Inquisitor''': One of the Inquisitors accompanying Fyodor. He appears as an Inquisitor brandishing bulky power armor, almost resembling Terminator armor (because it is, since it's a Grey Knight Grand Master, called "Grey Knight Leader" in the ending; on a side note, the Ordo Malleus has human size Terminator Armours in it's possession). Is the most level-headed of the group.
[[Image:Here.png|thumb|right]]
*'''[[Ordo Xenos]] Inquisitor''': One of the Inquisitors accompanying Fyodor whom you'd recognize if you've ever seen them. A xeno fetishist, evidence suggests she is actually a tsundere for [[Genestealers]], and only dreams of being held in the strong, manly arms of her [[Broodlord]]-kun. She appears to be the bad cop of the group with a short temper and a rough, Russian accent. She claim that the letter of disbanding inquisition was written by a genestealer cult under the Emperor's name.
[[Image:Xen.png|thumb|right]]
*'''[[Ordo Hereticus]] Inquisitor''': One of the Inquisitors accompanying Fyodor. He appears as an Inquisitor dressed in black and using a bolt pistol with a sight mount (which is exactly from the front cover of [[Dark Heresy]]). Don't let his soft-spoken tone fool you, this guy gets aroused at the thought of executing other people regardless of what they've done. He is favor of the door-kicking-and-burning-building type of exterminatus, just like a medieval witch hunter.
*'''[[Torquemada Coteaz]]''': One of the Inquisitors who joined Fyodor's assault into the Imperial Palace. He shows up after Fyodor's forces was blocked off by a force of loyal Ecclesiarchy priests led by Decius in the palace, but breaches their defenses by throwing a barrel of Jokaero at the defenders. This plan causes Fyodor to lose any respect for him, which solicits a disheveled response from [[Awesome|Torquemada, telling him to get off his Throne of Judgement and tell him to his face, or use his multi-melta to do what he's too pathetic to]]. Fyodor backs off and lets him leave. So far he appears to be the only sane Inquisitor, snarling at Fyodor to not execute the Emperor for whatever offense he may pull out of his ass. He's also busy with [[The Lord Inquisitor|making a film]], which is why he didn't stay to see Fyodor's plans go to the Warp.
*'''Inquisitor Javerticus''': the most dedicated and charismatic of them all, and also an awesome singer and swordsman. Sadly, the Grey Knights doesn't seem to comprehend his awesomely dramatic greatness.

*'''The Gods of [[Chaos]]''': The gods here are less chaotic than their canon counterparts. More-or-less they just sit around and talk to each other, the way they did prior to the Emperor showing up and making plans to wreck their collective shit.
**[[Tzeentch]] is a petty schoolyard bully/prankster who also likes to engage in pointless overthought pseudo-philosophy, and it's unclear if he means it or if it's just part of him being a troll.
**[[Slaanesh]] is a hyperactive masochistic camwhore. Steals from Khorne and trolls with sexual innuendos.
**[[Khorne]] is the only half-way normal Chaos God (if that term could ever be applied to the Gods), who has yet to appear beyond screaming at Slaanesh for being a creepy whore. Has a fairly good relationship with Khaine, though, and they work out together at the gym. Never skips leg day, unlike the Emperor.
**[[Nurgle]] is the only one actually doing any scheming. Has a voice that's really hard to understand without subtitles, and is more focused on his waifu Isha than actually doing anything.
**[[Malal]] makes several short appearances, conversing with the various gods on Spacebook where he declares he will ruin everyone once he becomes canon again by escaping the "Retconnian" (a dimension where the Squats, Horus' soul, and other things that don't exist anymore are banished to) and a second time is shown to exist in a pocket outside canon where he is able to influence things that are canon in subtle ways using the [[Black Crusade (RPG)|"Tyrant Star", a wandering sun that gives off black light and incites anarchy and chaos on whatever planet it shines on]]. It appears that his obsession to become relevant again is a harmful one, as Horus and a Squat talk him down from his attempts and console him when he breaks down crying about his futile attempts.

*'''[[Lucius the Eternal]]''': Slaanesh's premier champion, who sounds like what would happen if Mickey Mouse turned to Slaanesh and became a drag queen in the process (his first appearance is a direct reference to [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g56q3j8NAcw this]). First shown fucking up some Imperial Guardsmen (in all senses of the word) with his warband, laughing like a maniac all the while. He then got a call from Fulgrim, inviting him and his band to join one of Abaddon's [[Black Crusade|"huge parties"]], which he accepted. His absolutely creepy portrayal in the series is quickly becoming one of the scariest (and most enjoyable) things in the franchise, sorta an impressive achievement. Runs a prank show in his spare time, and posts the results to Spacebook.

*'''[[Ahzek Ahriman]]''': Most powerful sorcerer of the [[Thousand Sons]]. Appears in a short scene where he finally gets access to the [[Black Library]], only to be dicked with, and eventually booted out by [[Cegorach]]. Decided to quit trying to get into the Black Library for a while and take a break, but decided against the latter after being summoned by Abaddon for the Black Crusade.

*'''[[Typhus]]''': Chaos Lord of the [[Death Guard]]. Has the voice of Gilbert Gottfried, which he uses to read [[Squad Broken|erotic fanfiction]] for Lucius. Like the other chaos champions, he's been summoned by Abbadon for the Black Crusade.

*'''[[Huron Blackheart]]''': We cannot confirm his appearance in the series proper, but it appears that he is with [[Abaddon]] in the Season 3 intro, perhaps pointing to an alliance of sorts. Why in the all the names of Chaos he is there, we don't know.

*'''The [[Tyranid]] Hivemind''': Attempted to hijack the Chaos Gods' warpchat, but was kicked after too many synapses attempted connections. The Emperor claims that talking to the Tyranid Hivemind is like talking to a herd of hungry sheep.

===Others===
*'''[[Horus|FUCKING HORUS]]''': Appears in the April Fool's episode, where he breaks into the Emperor's throne room and incapacitates him. The Emperor declares Horus can't win because he's all alone, but says he isn't as he gathered allies while he was clawing his way out of The Warp, all of whom are some of the dead/retconned/obscure characters in the fluff, like; The Beast (An Ork who waged one of the most successful WAAAGH!s in human history), Goge Vandire (The man responsible for the worst chapter in Imperial History after the Horus Heresy), [[Sindri Myr]], the Megarachnids (A footnote insectoid race in the fluff, who were hunted to extinction by the Astartes in the Great Crusade.), the [[Squats]] (We all know who they are), Hermann Von Strab (One of the most inept commanders the Imperium has ever seen, who met his end in the 3rd War of Armageddon.), the [[Old Ones]], the Techno-Barbarians of olden Terra, 3ED [[Carnifex|Old One Eye]] and [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1kXU14hkuSI SLY MARBOOO] *cue explosions*. He subsequently declares himself as the new Emperor. Later appeared for real in the second Q&A in the "Retconnian" with Malal and the Squats, and calms Malal's tantrum like a parent consoling a child.
*'''[[Ghazghkull Mag Uruk Thraka]]''': Currently beating up the Overfiend of Octarius, as in official lore. It's still unknown where Ghazzy's gonna fit into things, though it will likely be to assemble all Orks into a single Great WAAAGH!!
[[Image:Cyph.jpg|thumb|right]]
*'''[[Cypher]]''': He has a very vague, mysterious plot involving the planet Orior and its STCs. This seems to take place not long after the [[Fallen_Angels#Ophidium Gulf Crusade Incident|Ophidium Gulf Crusade Incident]], as the Dark Angels managed to locate him by tracking his ship. He also seems to be skilled at disguise, as he just manages to waltz right into the Thunderhawk behind Azrael without any further comment. He's on his way towards Mars with the Dark Angels.
*'''Dolphan Gruss''': A Magos Explorator sent to Orior by the [[Adeptus Mechanicus|Admech]] to investigate the planet's STC. He is very blunt and dismissive when dealing with "fleshbags", and does so while speaking with a French accent. His most remarkable feature, however, is a drill that replaces his right hand, which, predictably, makes him the butt of many [[Anime|anime]]-related jokes, much to his dismay.
*'''[[Cegorach]]''': The Laughing God, shown guarding the Black Library. He encounters Ahriman trying to enter and forcefully boots him out after a bit of trolling. For some reason, he has a French accent.
*'''[[Isha]]''': Despite being a kidnapping victim initially, Isha is now in a relationship with Nurgle. She hates Tzeentch and Slaanesh, mocking the former and encouraging Nurgle to plague the latter.
*'''[[Gork]] and [[Mork]] (or was it Mork and Gork?)''': Two dumbfucks who argue with each other in other people's conversations on Spacebook, with Gork not actually knowing he's using the Interwarp and trying to figure out how to use it while already on it.
*'''[[Khaine]]''': Disappointed and annoyed by all the young Gods around him, sounds like an old man beat-down by life. He mostly hangs out in the warp chat and goes to the gym with Khorne.
[[Image:Text Marines.jpg|thumb|right]]
[[Image:Eliphas.jpg|thumb|right]]
*'''[[Felinids]]''': [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iUuvHPr4BGk The ultimate let-down.]
*'''[[Necron|Necrons]]''': They appear initially in a mini-episode by Karl. Necrons all speak with low-quality Text to Speech devices, except for the Lords who can afford higher quality devices. Shennanigans ensue when an unnamed Necron Lord discovers that his lowly minions can't pronounce certain things, so now all necrons make roflcopter sounds as their war cries. '''SOI SOI MOTHERFUCKER'''
*'''[[Stormcast Eternals|Ground Marines]]''': Introduced as a short spoof episode after the release of [[Age of Sigmar]], a group of Ultramarines determined to bring their superior selves to the service of [[Sigmar|"other Emperors"]] enter a portal and come out transformed as Stormcast Eternals, their appearance crushing a small group of [[The Empire (Warhammer Fantasy)|Empire]] Flagellants. Text then appeared expressing condolences for [[Warhammer Fantasy]] fans. Although non-canon, its a jab at Games Workshop's need to crowbar Space Marines everywhere ([https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_-MzNpMD1K8 As the Stormcast Eternals largely resemble the Space Marines]. Heck, their posterboy group even takes after [[Ultramarines|The Greatest Of Them All]] with the blue, white, and gold color scheme).
*'''[[Eliphas The Inheritor]]''': Makes a cameo in the second Q&A episode having sent a letter to the Emperor saying "Dear Corpse Emperor, Furk You." The episode then cuts to him laughing manically thinking he's so clever before the Emperor psychically punches him, promptly shutting him up.
*'''Little Billy''': A running gag character in the series. His appearance is a psychic child who made himself a crude power-armor costume using cardboard boxes, with Alfabusa's grey and blue livery for colors. The gag about him is that Billy is constantly subjected to lethal/traumatizing events, yet still survive to appear again, leading to a joke that he is actually a perpetual. So far he's been: run over by a space marine attack bike, kidnapped and thrown into a Dark Eldar slave pit ''twice'', and implied to have been molested by Lucius after contacting him using a psychic link and suddenly appearing before him and hammered in the face by a Deathwatch member before almost getting eaten by Tyranids in [https://youtu.be/mabM64rAd4k?t=25m32s| Behemoth]. He's also apparently talked to the High Lords at least once, since the Grand Provost Marshal hallucinates him.
*'''Hobo Guardsman''': also known as "Hobo-chan." Like Billy, he exists to be traumatized by the grim darkness of the universe. First he becomes an unwilling recipient of Lucius' charity efforts, that being a sandwich made from ''"freshly milked [[daemonette]] [[trap|milk]]"'', then later he gets harassed by the [[Adeptus Arbites]] for adding rat meat to his rations to make them more edible. Fed up with the bullshit, he decides to join Chaos, getting warped away before his planet is destroyed by Exterminatus.
*'''Inquisitor Headsmash''': Hangs around on a ship in low orbit waiting for heresy to occur. Has a heavily reinforced Exterminatus button which he gets a LOT of use of it - as the name implies, he hits it repatedly using his head. Has the enviable talent of hearing heresy from orbit.
*'''Space Wolves Wulfen''': any mention of the Wulfen is normally echoed with someone shouting "[[Gorkamorka|Digganobz]]" in a demented manner. This is referred within a youtube short: the Grandmaster of the Grey Knights, sir Covan Leorac, was presented a image of the Wulfen and he called them Digganobz. And yes they really do look like Digganobz.
*'''[[Sly Marbo]]''': [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1kXU14hkuSI The One-Man Army], [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jCMNWAJiz5Y Hero of the Imperium!]
*'''The Citizens Of The Imperium''': In special episodes where the Emperor answers mail from citizens of the Imperium (most of which is questions asked by watchers of the series), Loyalist humanity plus an odd Xeno or Chaos entity ask questions of him. These are supposed to by sorted by ''Little Kitten'' and later Magnus as well, but quite a few stupid ones get through to the point that without the aid of the cuddly Centurion, the Emperor's frustration causes Warpstorms which obliterate chunks of the universe.

==The Order of The Primarchs Return(?)==
During the season 3 intro, the silhouettes of all the primarchs seems to appear in the order they will first enter the show, as the order roughly corresponds with their actual in-series appearances so far.

* [[Rogal Dorn]] (although we don't find out it's Dorn until after Magnus turns up)
* [[Magnus]]
* [[Vulkan]]
* [[Leman Russ]]
* [[Corvus Corax]]
* [[Ferrus Manus]]
* [[Lion El'Jonson]]
* [[Jaghatai Khan]]
* [[Angron]]
* [[Perturabo]]
* [[Lorgar]]
* [[Mortarion]]
* [[Fulgrim]]
* [[Alpharius]] ???
* [[Konrad Curze]]
* [[Roboute Guilliman]]
* [[Sanguinius]]
* [[Horus]]

==Trivia==
* The Emperor's motivation for creating the Human Webway was obtaining Eldar prostitutes, who could take him much better than humans could. The other benefits were an afterthought.
* The Emperor is plagued by a phantom-itch (courtesy of Nurgle) which caused his nose to continue itching long after it fell off and rotted out of existence. Tzeentch believes the frustration will cause him to explode, destroying humanity and causing him to become a new Chaos God.
* The Emperor likes tacos.
* The Emperor believes that [[Love Can Bloom]] will result in humans passing STDs onto Eldar, so he condones interspecies romance.
* The Emperor's left eye was accidentally poked out by Rogal Dorn's iron halo while attaching him to the Golden Throne (prompting the replacement before the rest of his body decayed). The Emperor intends to somehow resurrect him to punish him for it (though now that's no longer a necessity). Actually, in older depictions of the Emperor's duel with Horus, it is one of the wounds inflicting upon him (he also broke many bones, burned the Emperor's fabulous hairs, poisoned him and a lot of stuff...).
* Some of the Emperor's previous personas included Moses and [[Chris-Chan]]. Yes, really.
* The Emperor's shattered psyche includes knowledge of the 4th wall. This is not always available.
* The Emperor created the formula indicating when there is enough [[dakka]]. Only he himself and Kitten know it.
* The Emperor approves of the Tau in theory, although in practice only those willing to engage in melee. So basically just the [[Farsight|Farsight Enclaves]].
* In fact, the Emperor actually approves of any Xenos that isn't a threat to mankind. Absolute eradication is unnecessary if regulation suffices.
* Despite his intentions for the Imperial Truth involve suffocating the Chaos Gods, the Emperor's attempts at atheism are in fact making [[Necoho|an actual god of disbelief]]...according to Magnus.
* The Emperor can shape the [[Astronomicon]] so that he can flip the bird to the rest of the galaxy.
* Has a known hobby: Plays a children's card game (Yu Gi Oh) with a clearly cheesy, overpowered and unfair deck...that, like most [[cheese]], was destroyed as soon as it came across a hard counter. [[Horus Heresy|Apparently Emprah still hasn't learnt the lesson about why using OP stuff is a very bad idea.]]
* The Emperor has called for a second Council of Nikea. This one has nothing to do with Magnus; ironically, it's centered on the <s>Space Wolves</s> Space ''Corgis'', and the fact that the [[wikipedia:Woodland Critter Christmas|friendly woodland critters]] of Fenris that the Wolves commune with are actually daemons. We've yet to see Magnus' and Leman Russ' reaction to the news, but it's guaranteed to be hilarious.
* He has also ordered [[Logan Grimnar]] to deliver presents to all the good little boys and girls in the Imperium on Sanguinala.
* While he has a number of colorful insults for his subordinates, including the primarchs, he also has pet names for his sons, such as "my little Magnymagic" or "RogalyDonDon."
* The First Founding was originally named the [[Only Founding]], this was renamed after [[Codex Astartes|Guilliman's fuck up]].
* [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RuE2waTrXKk The Emperor disapproves of the saying "Life is the Emperor's currency"]

==Gallery==
<gallery>
Image:Text To Heresy.png| If [[/d/]] still existed in 40k you can bet the Emperor would purge it.
Image:NOT CANON.png| Kitten with his TOTALLY NOT CANON girlfriend [[Shadowsun]]
Image:NotCanonShout.gif| What happens whenever someone mentions Shadowsun around Kitten
Image:EmperorSureal.gif| Emp's reaction to most things that have happened to the Imperium
Image:EmperorDisgraceful.gif| Likewise
Image:EmperorPunchesTzeentch.gif| The Emperor taking out his frustration on a certain [[Tzeentch|indecisive mollusk]]
Image:MagnusRant.gif| Magnus is not a fan of the Imperium's general intelligence levels
Image:DeciusHatBoner.gif| What passes for "Religious Ecstasy" in the Ecclisiarchy
Image:UltraFucknCrying.gif| Calgar's dissapointment over the flanderization of the Ultramarines is palpable
Image:PillarstodesEntrance.gif| [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XUhVCoTsBaM| *Cue Awaken.mp3*]
Image:AhrimanEXCUSEME.gif| Ahriman is a very grumpy boss
Image:SlaaneshPatrol.gif| If you hear EDM outside, don't answer the door. EVER.
Image:HighLordsIllegal.gif| The High Lords in a nutshell
Image:SuddenlyDaemons.gif| Magnus' original fuckup barely phased him at the time.
</gallery>

==External Links==

* [https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLyiDf91_bTEgnBN0jAvzNbqzrlMGID5WA The entire series.]
* [http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/WebVideo/IfTheEmperorHadATextToSpeechDevice TV Tropes's page, for extra references.]
* [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qqbQ_oKmflM A remix cover of the ending theme by StringStorm, check his other remixes too.]
* [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bzPuK1vib_c Not content with his first remix, StringStorm made a second one.]

[[Category:Warhammer 40,000]][[Category:Gods]]

Warhammer 40,000: Eternal Crusade

2016-07-18T00:01:16Z

2604:6000:1407:8035:C91F:D5E6:1B98:F554: /* Tyranids */

[[File:Warhammer-40000-eternal-cursade-logo.png|700px|center]]

'''Warhammer 40,000 Eternal Crusade''' is a Massive Multiplayer Online Third-Person Shooter (think Planetside) that was announced at E3 2013 and is slated to be released in 2016. It will be available for the '''PC''', '''PS4''' and the '''Xbox One/Ten'''. Steam Early access has now opened, the NDA has dropped and all that good stuff so there is plenty of content to view at your leisure.

Now many of you think that this is such wonderful news, right ? Well... This is still up to debate since the game is being developed by the people who have given us such wonderful titles like '''Wet''', '''Dante's Inferno''' (PSP), '''[[The Lord of the Rings]]: Conquest''' (DS) and '''Naughty Bear'''. However, Behavior (the guys making this thing) pulled in talent from all around - especially from Funcom Montreal (Age of Conan, The Secret World); recently, [[Graham McNeill]] and [[Anthony Reynolds]] (known for writing the [[Ultramarines]] and [[Word Bearers]] series, respectively) have been confirmed to be working alongside them as well. The devs have confirmed that if you buy the game, you unlock all the premium content (IE rest of the races), and that Dark Angels and Iron Warriors are *not* the only Space Marine/Chaos Space Marine chapters present.

Orks are planned to be the only F2P race, and the devs are hoping this will make them outnumber the rest of the other factions when released. So, that is a higher than average understanding of 40k lore, and is typically considered a genius fucking idea. Unfortunately, this "Free To WAAAGH" system, as it's called, has been delayed to until after the initial release of the game, which has led many fans to begin wonder if the developers have complete control over the game at this point.

==Current State==

The current state of the game is in Alpha state - Space Marines and Chaos Space Marine and Eldar are in, and the games are played as instanced arcade-esque shooters not unlike [[Warhammer 40,000: Space Marine|Space Marine's multiplayer.]] If this sounds quite far from the original premise, that's because it is; Seeing how insurmountable an MMO of this kind of proportions would be to create from scratch, Behaviour decided to scale down the initial size of the game, and then scale ''that'' down for Open Alpha. For Alpha the game is a straight-up classic shooter, with bog-standard matchmaking and 25 to 30 minute control point matches, with factions being added on a "when it's done" schedule. For the release candidate, the game will still have the four races, the classes and general gameplay promised, but the world will be cut up into 20+ instances, where the players will fight in several matches to control the region. The long-term plan is to gradually open up the world, making larger regions, until the continent of EC is one region in it's entirety, somewhat like Planetside 2, as was originally the plan. An invading army will need to capture at least 2 of a region's outposts before they can attack the primary base of that region, allowing for large-scale strategic planning. Once the Tyrannids are implemented, they'll help balance out control for the map as they'll attack whoever controls the most territory.

While this has lead to much outcry from the Founders and the fanbase in general, many do now see the benefit of improving the core gameplay to be a fun shooter, before making a massive world with barely nothing in it and with poor gameplay. Furthermore, through the weekly Twitch shows and an active cooperation with fans on the forum, combined with a positive reaction to the current Alpha build, the initial outrage over this controversial move has died down a bit.

== Races ==
The game will debut with four playable factions and one NPC faction, each including several subgroups, and classes. The class list has been confirmed on the EC forums and it mostly the standard stuff as seen below. Sub-factions will all have unique bonuses which will effect the game such as Space Wolves having access to Rune Priests, Blood Angels Sanguinary Guard and so on. We haven't had full confirmation of each of these effects but they are confirmed as being in.

===Space Marines===

Ah, Space Marines. Heroes, [[Mary Sue|Mary Sues]], warrior monks and nazi supersoldiers, the Space Marines are the "generalist" faction, with no particular strength or weakness. Their Apothecaries tend to be better in defensive envoirments, and with the addition of the Storm Shield, they have taken defense as their main stick. There's not a lot to say about them; they're marines, what do you expect. The current playerbase is predominantly Space Marines, and Space Marines fans make up 40% of the fans. So nothing new there.

A lot of people are crying on the fora that Space Marines doesn't feel "Space Marine" enough, being too weak and feeble for their taste. While the TTK is slated to be increased, a lot of people are in for a surprise when Marines aren't the most powerful faction in a game with four, equally supported factions. Part of the "problem" here is the engine mechanics, which deliberately makes all characters in the entire game somewhat sluggish (the best example is how infantry have a maximum turning speed, so upping your mouse sensitivity won't let you you 360 quickscope, and there's lots of other more subtle examples)

*'''Chapters''': [[Ultramarines]], [[Space Wolves]], [[Blood Angels]], [[Dark Angels]], [[Imperial Fists]].
*'''Classes''': [[Tactical Squad|Tactical Marines]], [[Devastator Squad|Devastators]], [[Assault Squad|Assault Marines]], Ground Assault (take standard assault and replace jump packs with shields) and [[Apothecary|Apothecaries]].
**'''Elites''': [[Legion of the Damned]] Legionnaire, [[Terminators]] (Confirmed not for initial Release) and [[Techmarine]]s (Unconfirmed if for release), among others.
**'''Heroes''': Master of Relics, [[Librarian]]s and [[Chaplain]]s, among others.
*'''Faction Leader''': [[Belial]], Master of the [[Deathwing]].
**'''Sub-Faction Leaders''':
***Ultramarines: TBA, [[Captain Titus]] if we're lucky, [[Cato Sicarius]] if we're not.
***Space Wolves: [[Ragnar Blackmane]].
***Blood Angels: [[Mephiston]], Lord of Death.
***Dark Angels: [[Interrogator-Chaplain]] Cassiel.
***Imperial Fists: TBA

===Chaos Space Marines===

Pissed off motherfuckers ''de jure'', the Chaos Space Marines are, like the Space Marines, a generalist faction, but thanks to their Sorcerers, the newly introduced "Mark of Nurgle" and the skill of the generally [[/tg/|neckbearded veteran players]], Chaos Marines are more aggressive, and can have some outright insanely long sieges on enemy points. Chaos Marines will be very customizable, and their Marks will make them quite the force to be reckoned with. In addition, the fact that the current playerbase is almost exclusively grizzled 40k veterans make a lot of teams driven and better at coordination. 'Cause dem corpse-worshippin' fellas gotta burn.

<s>Chaos is the second most popular faction at the moment.</s> Only because there've only been 2 factions for the longest time.

*'''Legions''': [[Iron Warriors]], [[Word Bearers]], [[Black Legion]], [[Night Lords]], [[Alpha Legion]].
*'''Classes''': [[Raptors]], [[Havoc]]s, [[Chaos Space Marine|Tactical]]s, Ground Assault (Chaos equivalent to Space Marine version, but they get a Mark of Nurgle instead of a shield), [[Chaos Sorcerer|Aspiring Sorcerer]]s (Sorcerers here being the equivalent of a Healer/Support - Will be able to switch out their spells, and they are all ranged, so expect Aspiring Sorcerer's to be the exemplary Support class).
**'''Elites''': [[Possessed Marine]] and [[Terminators]] (Confirmed for not initial Release)
**'''Heroes''': [[Fallen Angels|Fallen]] Captain
*'''Faction Leader''': [[Abaddon]] the motherfucking Despoiler.
**'''Sub-faction Leaders'''
***Iron Warriors: TBA
***Word Bearers: TBA
***Black Legion: Ash'Hy Mok: a badass sorcerer created for the narrative who has been very busy liquefying space marines and Eldar alike in the short stories release each week.
***Night Lords: TBA
***Alpha Legion: TBA

===Orks===

The Orks are slated to be the good old underdog faction we all know and love from the tabletop, and will be geared towards close-quarters combat and melee. How exactly the faction is going to function is yet to be revealed, but many fans theorize that a WAAAGH mechanic is sure to be implemented, which will gear Orks to play together in large groups. Unlike what some of you might think ([[Space Marines|you know who you are]]), the Orks are ''not'' a horde army in the traditional sense, and Ork characters will be on the same level as any other character from another faction, by a combination of 'Ard Armour, Ork tenacity and a little goodwill, as stated by the developers. Discussions on the official forums about whether Orks should control large groups of Orks or be Nobs persists regardless.

Orks will be bolstered by "Free2Waaagh", which will hopefully boost Ork numbers significantly.

*'''Klans''': [[Goffs]], [[Evil Sunz]], [[Deathskulls]], [[Bad Moons]], [[Blood Axes]]
*'''Classes''': [[Painboy]]s, [[Stormboy]]s, [[Loota|Loota]]s, [[Ork Boy]]s.
**'''Elites''': Cybork Madboys, [[Nob]]s, [[Meganob]]s (Probably [[Weirdboy]]s and [[Mekboy]]s but not confirmed).
**'''Heroes''': Skarboy Kommandos has been confirmed as a hero class. Probably [[Warboss]]es. No full heroes announced officially though. (Don't be mistaken by the shop, some of those are heroes - others are elites)
*'''Faction Leader''': Warboss Skarblitz (a Bad Moon with a Dreadnought's power fist as his Power Klaw and a thing for smashin' [[Space Wolves|Wolves]].)
**'''Sub-faction Leaders''':
***Goffs: Luguk 'Edpuncha, known for being the largest Goff on <s>Arkhona</s> Orkhona and carrier of the kombi-rokkit launcha called Spare Keys (you know, as in 'Look boss, dis door is locked', 'No worries grot! I brought my spare keys!' KABLOOIE!)
***Evil Sunz: Brakenek Wazcrash, arrived on Arkhona recently, fought some 'nids and got a cool idea for a plasma cannon design.
***Bad Moons: Gazzagug, a [[Weirdboy|warphead]], and one of the senior members of Skarblitz's tribe.
***Deathskulls: TBA
***Blood Axes: TBA

===Eldar===

Our favourite Space Elves are the fourth faction in the roster, and will propably be the most alien of the four. Eldar will be a faster, more dodgy faction based around speed and dodging, while staying out of the enemy's reach. Eldar have a more limited class customization but have more classes to reflect the paths, as per fluff. Not a lot have been shown on the Eldar, but of them and the Orks, the Eldar are a little more settled in their general concept, and as such get less widespread discussion done.

... Or they would be if the fanbase weren't pretty much nazis on anything Eldar shown up until now; upon seeing the first model made for the game, the Eldar part of the forum went mad over how every little detail was messed up. At least they're invested, we suppose.

*'''Craftworlds''': [[Craftworld Biel-tan|Biel-tan]], [[Craftworld Saim-Hann|Saim-Hann]], [[Craftworld Iyanden|Iyanden]], [[Craftworld Ulthwé|Ulthwé]], Altansar
*'''Classes''': [[Swooping Hawks]], [[Striking Scorpions]], [[Howling Banshees]], [[Dire Avengers]], [[Dark Reapers]], [[Fire Dragons]], and [[Warlock]]s (Acting as the healer/support class, much like Chaos Aspiring Sorcerers)
**'''Elites''': [[Wraithguard]]s and [[Eldar Ranger|Outcast Ranger]]s
**'''Heroes''': [[Autarch]]s (Probably [[Farseer]]s but not confirmed)
*'''Faction Leader''': Jain Zar, Phoenix Lord of the Howling Banshees.
**'''Sub-Faction Leaders''':
***Biel-tan: Possibly a farseer named Ksenyia, found in one of the short stories, but yet to be fully confirmed.
***Saim-Hann: An Autarch by the name of Maelydahn Windstrider; a young and energetic guy with flowing red hair.
***Iyanden: Soraya, an old Deathspeaker wearing an azure cloak hiding most of her body.
***Ulthwe: Warlock Amatheon, a badass old guy who, for some reason, can't see through the Warp for shit.
***Altansar: TBA

===Tyranids===
While [[Tyranids]] are confirmed to be in the game, they will not be playable. Instead, they will be an [[NPC]] faction, providing enemies for PvE content in underground "Hives", which act as wave defence maps, and acting as a counterbalance to ensure that no one faction remains overwhelmingly dominant over the others by attacking random regions, and so attacking the most powerful factions the most. Using tyranids to maintain the status quo... Now [[Games Workshop|where have I seen that before]]?

*'''Creatures:'''
**'''Small:''' [[Hormagaunt|Hormagaunts]], [[Termagaunt|Termagaunts]].
**'''Medium:''' [[Tyranid Warriors|Warriors]].
**'''Large:''' [[Carnifex|Carnifexes]]

==Possible Future Races==
The developers have said that they would like to add all races over time, assuming the game is successful enough. Here is a list of non-launch races that have been mentioned by the devs. Feel free to add to this if you've heard any other tidbits.

===Dark Eldar===
Unconfirmed, but implied in a newsletter.

===Tau===
Were noted in an interview by Miguel Caron as being one of the three most requested races, at the time of the interview. Watching the devs try to justify the Tau appearing is going to be fun to watch, since the game takes place clear on the other side of the galaxy.

===Adepta Sororitas===
Were noted in the same interview as being one of the three most requested races. Were also referenced by Creative Director David Ghozland as being on the post-launch list via twitter.

===Necrons===
Were also one of the three most requested races.

== Setting ==
[[File:arkhona_vision_starmap.jpg|800px|thumb|right|Notice the planet Simahgr. Take out the 'h' and re-arrange it, and then it spells out as "Sigmar"... clever eh?]]
Now anyone who has knowledge of [[Warhammer 40,000]] obviously knows the setting. However, the games events will be taking place on the Kharon System, located in the northern part of the [[Segmentum#Segmentum Obscurus|Segmentum Obscurus]]. One of the devs said in an interview that it will follow a planet wide contest for a single undisclosed planet, known as Arkhona, and the events that happen from this game will become canon, but the details are yet to be released. The planet in question is somewhere in the Segmentum Obscurus and was once an effective Imperial settlement, but due to the planets volatile nature, no great foothold could be gained on the planet other than small outposts. The planet was also once inhabited by an alien race, that supposedly was exterminated during the [[Great Crusade]]. Now, [[Tyranids]] are appearing out of absolutely nowhere, killing everyone left on the planet, apparently coming from ''the underground of the planet'' like they had been hibernating there. Weird.

All this calls the playable races to action for different, yet to be revealed reasons, and are now to duke it out on the surface of the planet while the Tyranids eat everything. [[How Imperial Life Is Worse Than You Can Imagine|Lovely.]]

Arkhona is actually just the primary planet in a system, one that has three different colored suns, for some reason, and with ten planets or moons of playable size, so obviously down the line there will be downloadable content where you start fighting on a new planet.

Arkhona, fifth planet from the three suns, hopefully far enough to not fucking melt in the daylight.

==Monetization==
Eternal Crusade is partially free-to-play. Without paying, players can access the game but are limited to Ork Boyz, who cannot advance beyond a certain degree. Those who buy the game have access to all factions and full advancement. There is no monthly subscription, however a cash shop is planned. While Miguel Carron mentioned he will have Pay 2 Win "over [his] dead body", players will be able to pay for gear that is about 20% weaker to equivalent gear that can be found through playing the game normally, as well as cosmetics which do not affect gameplay. But apparently multiple classes and vehicles will be available only through the founder's program, so everybody's a little confused about whether this "sidegrades" concept is true, a [[Creed|stealth cover]] a [[Land Raider]]'s worth of pay-to-win bullshit, or something in between. It's too early to tell now, but news regarding additional advantages for players who subscribed to the Founder's Program, the repeated silencing of dissent on the game's forums, and the fact that several major contributors to the game have all left Behavior with little to no explanation (some theorize it might be downsizing or worse) is leading many to assume that the end result will be a far cry from what was originally announced. Assuming it too doesn't go the way of Dark Millennium, that is- a fate that only seems more likely as time passes with little to show for it. Though considering the game has opened a closed Alpha state, it will not be going the way of Dark Millennium, however if it becomes a success is yet to be seen.

== Game Features ==
Read more about the game [http://www.mmorpg.com/gamelist.cfm/game/954/feature/7493/Warhammer-40000-Eternal-Crusade-There-Is-Only-WAR.html here]

The game will be mostly [[PvP]], happening on multiple continents, with campaigns lasting from a week to unconfirmed, with the actual campaign goals set by a player controlled War Council. When the campaign is over you either win or fucking lose (tears) and move onto the next campaign, with new planets perhaps coming later. [[Tyranids]] are [[NPC]]s and will be used in part to keep things a little bit balanced if player faction numbers are too unequal or one faction is dominating for other reasons. They will also constitute the PvE content, probably all of it. In short:

*PVP oriented with splashes of PVE
*Tyranids are the PVE and are as such not playable. They work perfectly for PvE, and you couldn't balance them properly. [[Tyranid Warrior]] >> Space Marine >> [[Termagaunt]].
*Combat is visceral/skill based over-the-shoulder dakka/melee, much like Space Marine.
*Vehicles. Currently in the alpha are Predators, Vindicators and Rhinos for both marines, and Wave Serpents, Falcons, and Warp Hunters for eldar. Land speeder type craft are on the table, but not confirmed as of yet. Bikes are guranteed.
*The devs are also regularly interacting with the fans. Which is pretty much unheard of. Ask some fucking questions.
*Players will all get their own space ship which acts as player housing, that you can decorate as you like. Guilds can combine their ships together for larger housing and more options (like guild banking)
*Class customization: Assaults can trade their jump packs in for extra armor or a shield (confirmed), healer classes may potentially (not yet confirmed) be able to become support/engineer classes, as in Mekboy with a Kustum Force Field or whathaveyou.
*Day/Night cycle
*Weather, which will affect combat
*Friendly fire (Now working on the punishment system)
*Dreads, if they figure out how to implement it
*Perils of the Warp, which as of the streams have been foretold to work like the 'Gears of War' active reload
*Red ones go Fasta
*Executions which give bonus XP when performed and prevent a downed enemy from being revived, but leave the player vulnerable during the execution animation. (Going through a testing phase right now where they happen at double speed)
*Bleed-out/Revive system stolen from Gears of War, with the option to bleed faster (nominally for avoiding executions, but mostly for respawning faster)
*Cover system with crouching and vaulting.
*Classes that use jump-packs can wall jump.
*No P2W, devs are vehemently against buying power.
**Some gear can be bought, but it will be of inferior maximum potential compared to gear earned through in-game methods or otherwise not a true upgrade.
*Miguel has a weird thing about Ork butts, as in two interviews he's described Ork butts and executions in the same sentence.
*There's been some talk about "multiplayer narrative", which basically means that there are several 'War Councils' (leaders of the factions as chosen by the players in those factions), who will be able to create objectives and put in-game resources towards specific goals and warzones as they see fit, therefore, when you enter the game, you could do the objectives assigned by the WC, do one of the slightly more generic, but ultimately "for the cause" daily/weekly/month objectives that the game will generate, or go of with your buddies and stomp 'nids. All of which ultimately help your faction. I suppose you could always charge of a do whatever the hell you want to, that is always good (Especially FreeToWAAAGH Ork Boys are expected to do this, as they are freelancers without Klans for the most, which frankly is goddamn fluffy).
* Playable Elite and Hero characters (with a few minutes to a day's worth of cool down. Some of these are gonna smack some heads in).
* Sonic blasters (no stock [[Noise Marine]] class; whether there will be a build-your-own is to be seen).

==See also==
* ''[[Warhammer 40,000: Space Marine]]''
* ''[[Warhammer 40,000: Dark Millenium]]'', which was canceled then un-canceled then turned into ''Eternal Crusade''

== Links ==
* [http://www.eternalcrusade.com/ Warhammer 40,000: Eternal Crusade]
* [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=brMfsxMs5F4 Meet the Team Video] Notice how the opening looks strangely familiar.
* [http://gamingbolt.com/warhammer-40k-eternal-crusade-interview-staying-relevant-with-f2p-all-out-online-war-next-gen-consoles-and-more An interview with the developers, lots of information.]
* [http://forum.eternalcrusade.com/ Official Forum]
* [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZuVeZ8n4CAQ Meet the Team 2] This video shows some very early game footage.
* [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B9H7LEecCB0 Full Pre-Alpha Footage Gameplay]
* [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AAlOe8fUoG0 Wars of Arkhona Official Trailer]

==Gallery==
<gallery>
Image: Eternalcrusade battlescene new.jpg| "We go where we wilt, we slay who we wilt. Let the Emperor judge the righteousness of our deeds!"
Image: Eternalcrusade web chaos.jpg| "In the name of the Dark Gods, we will bring down the rotting edifice that is the Imperium!"
Image: Eternalcrusade web orks.jpg| "I reckon these humies are just puny soft gits who need a good stompin!"
Image: Eternalcrusade web eldar.jpg| "How foolish they seem to our eyes. Once, all this was ours, and it will come back to us!"
Image: Eternalcrusade web tyranids.jpg| Where Ultramarines: The Movie had bolters that looked too big, this promotional artwork of the Tyranid reveal has bolters that look too small.
</gallery>

[[Category:Warhammer 40,000]][[Category:Video Games]]