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Eversor

2016-10-15T04:15:58Z

2605:E000:7ECF:7F00:F183:A45C:BAFB:9C5C: /* See Also */

[[Image:Eversor CUNT PUNT.png|thumb|350px|right|WRYYYY]]
''"Fear me, for I am your apocalypse."''

-Eversor Temple Mondus Executus

'''Eversors''' (Latin: "destroyer". Truth in advertising, oh ''yeah'') are one of the varieties of [[Assassin|assassin]] utilised by the [[Officio Assassinorum]] in the [[Warhammer 40k]] universe. They are psychotic nutters implanted with extensive cybernetics and drugged up to the eyeballs then put to cold sleep, only warmed up and awake during missions, making them near-perfect killing machines. On /tg/, Eversor assassins are known for their tendency to smash through walls and scream "WRYYYYY", shamelessly ripping off both the Kool-Aid man and Dio Brando, before slaughtering everything unfortunate enough to be in the room. Think "Chelios" from the Crank Films + Unlimited Adrenaline, this guy 360 noscopes everyone despite not having a Rifle and is pretty much batshit crazy with rage.

On the tabletop, Eversor assassins began life as near-invincible monstrosities; Melta Bombs made them the only assassin that could really threaten vehicles, while their combat drugs gave them the ability to do a triple-length charge or even not die until the end of the turn regardless of damage. The Neuro-Gauntlet's original incarnation halved the entire stat line of anything it wounded, including their remaining wounds, leading to combat best summarised as "oh hello Abaddon" *splat* "hello guardsman" *splat* "hello Grot."

These days, they are of debatable usefulness. With a lucky roll, they can cause incredible damage on a charge, but because of this the enemy tends to [[DISTRACTION CARNIFEX|concentrate quite heavily on shooting the screaming junkies before they have a chance to kill everything]]. If you're in a large battle, consider using one as a distraction. If the enemy kills it before it can do its thing, they've not been shooting at your other units with several heavy-hitters; if it gets into combat, enjoy rolling the most dice for a single model you'll probably ever roll. Just remember to use it to justify its points cost - whatever it does, it's an expensive piece that probably won't see the end of the battle.

As a short summary of the Eversor, think of your neighborhood drug-addict and/or serial killer, give him a chainsaw, a storm-bolter, power fists, power armor then inject him so full of morphine, meth, and whatever else you can inject to into him until it starts leaking from every opening in his body, then mind-control him so he can do your bidding and tell him to kill anyone and everyone and everything he sees that isn't you. That's a good idea of what an Eversor is. Actually, on second thoughts perhaps do the mind control first. Important safety tip. Or don't. Because grimdark.

Also, anytime and every time an Eversor shows up it means that shit will hit the fan, in fact it will hit the fan so hard that the fan flies off its socket and decapitates the [[Tau]] weeaboo communist that's waiting outside.

Last but not least, this insane cocktail of drugs masquerading as a living being is implanted with a specialized organ known as the Terminus gland. At the moment the body suffers terminal damage, the gland releases a new drug into the Eversor's body that renders the blood both acidic and combustible, meaning the Eversor ''explodes'' when you kill it. So even if you do gain the upper hand and kill it, an Eversor has the last laugh. A jittery, overly loud and creepy as fuck laugh.

Combined, this ''empirically makes the Eversor the most 40K thing in 40K,'' closely followed by the skull-faced patron saint of always being angry, Chaplain [[Lemartes]]. It is a superhuman zealot barely held together with drugs, fueled by rage, wearing a skull helmet, and it fucking explodes when you kill it. I ''FUCKING'' DARE YOU to think of something that better embodies all that is Warhammer 40,000.

==The Eversor's dynamic entry==
[[Image:LCB Eversor badend.jpg|Dynamic entry in action.|thumb|right|150px]]
1. [http://youtu.be/nBeUGqeYsQg?t=9s Scream: Oh yeah! While destroying point of entry.]
 
2. Commence Pelvic thrust
 
3. [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZOqNRGhlH-4 Wryyyyyy...]
 
4. Kill...KIIIIIILLLLL!!!!!!
 
5. ?????
 
6. [[Profit]]!

{{Story}}

==Kýrie Eléison==
'''Chapter One'''

Sick. The Officio Assassinorum drone always felt sick whenever he entered ‘the hive’. A long catwalk suspended in the middle of a cavernous hexagonal hall, the putrid green glow of endless status monitors and stasis tubes radiated an aura of death and decay. Not so unfitting for the legendary storage vaults of the Eversor Temple.

Despite his many trips to the hive, Nicolas Gilbo could never suppress the shiver in his spine that always snuck up on him when he least expected it. Shaking off his unease, he moved slowly to monitor station #4432 to finish the rites of rearming and release. He stared up into the face of death, suspended in a foetal position within its fluid tomb. The irony was not lost on him. A skeletal, barely human husk gazed vacantly back at him, its augmentics continually twitching despite being comatose. Out of curiosity, he flipped through this unit’s combat history. Unit service life three years. Number of sorties, two hundred and sixty. Estimated enemy casualties inflicted, eight thousand five hundred and twelve, half of those from a planetary governor’s dirigible brought down in the center of Falchion hive.

Biological age, twelve standard years.

But it was the list of wounds sustained in action that horrified him the most.

T3-T9 thoracic vertebrae shattered from an Ork Warboss, left arm amputated after close combat with World Eater Champion, fifty seven separate stubber and lasgun wounds. Three cardiac arrests and automated restarts, and it didn’t stop there. By the Emperor, what did it take to kill one of these things? With great trepidation, Gilbo keyed through the unit’s start up routine and assigned unit #4432 its next mission.

“What kind of dreams does a monster like you have?” Gilbo wondered.

==On the Tabletop==

The assassins have all got rapey statlines, and the Eversor is no different:

WS8 BS8 S4 T4 W3 I7 A4 Ld10

He gets the standard Infiltrate, Fearless, Move Through Cover, No Escape (-2 to enemy Look out, sir! attempts) and Lightning Reflexes (4++ and no penalty to I for charging through terrain) all other Assassins get. His standard wargear are a Power Sword (to be used along with his Executioner Pistol for that extra attack in CC) and Melta bombs in case he encounters MC or vehicles (against monstrous creatures he may get more mileage from using his other wargear but it is an amazing knockout punch against MC).

Now what sets him apart are his unique wargear.

First, he has Furious Charge so he's S5 (and AP3 with Power Sword) on the charge. He also has Feel No Pain, meaning he is less vulnerable to small arms fire next to some of the other assassins. Which makes sense given its horde-shredding duty.

His sentinel array grants him the fast shot special rule (he can fire his Executioner Pistol 4 times), and lets him overwatch at full BS (So he hits on 2s and if he rolls 1s, re-rolls and hits on 4+). Also, he can fire his Executioner Pistol's parts in any combo, but if your Eversor is getting assaulted, you've fucked up royally. Though don't forget it if it ever happens, taking out enough of a squad to cause a failed charge is often the difference between survival and death with lone operatives.

His Frenzon allows him to charge 3D6, and grants him 3 extra attacks on the charge. So, yes. A potential 18" charge range, and 8 S5 attacks on the charge.

Next is the Bio-meltdown. If he dies, all units in D6" take a S5 hit. So even if the enemy gangs up on him in CC, he still gets the last laugh.

Next is his actual Executioner Pistol. The first part is a classic Bolt Pistol while the other is the Needle Pistol which has Poison, but sadly no AP. So he can choose between shooting some average mooks or putting a high-toughness opponent in his place.

Finally, there's his Neuro Gauntlet. A weapon which is only S:User AP-, but is Fleshbane and Shred, just in case you happened to roll a 1. Used if you're up against a horde and want to go for quantity over quality of the Power Sword, or if the enemy has a 2+ or a good invulnerable save and you want to watch them try and tank saves.

Overall the Eversor is perhaps the most versatile of the four assassins. It can mow down hordes and MEQ's without too much trouble with FC and AP3 (though he can get AP3 the Gauntlet is perhaps the better option against low armour units as quantity will probably be better than quality against Armour 6+/5+). With its four shot pistol with a mixture of poison/bolt ammunition he has reasonable ranged capabilities. Can hurt vehicles and Monstrous creatures with Melta bombs and Fleshbane attacks. While also being capable of giving 2+ save and high invulnerable save opponents reasonable trouble (there is only so many saves you can make when you are throwing out 8 attacks that will almost always hit on 3's and with each hit having virtually guaranteed wounds), with this in mind the Eversor is for just plain killing but given how badly Assault has been nerfed over the past 2 Editions, placement during Infiltration is key, otherwise a 4++ and T4 isn't going to save you. He can go down to 1 turn of boltgun fire (average of 18 boltgun shots at BS4, or 36 lasgun shots at BS3 will down him), unless of course you manage to get lucky with his invul save and Feel No Pain and tank them all. So keep him out of line of sight, and make use of that triple charge range to get stuck in. Another potion is to outflank him as there will be no danger of him getting shot down due to charging as soon as he comes on, just watch out for reserve rolls and entering from a random board edge.

<s>Now that any Armies of the Imperium are allies with each other, this guy in a Drop Pod is just... disgusting.</s> The 7th Edition FAQ Draft put the kibosh on Battle Brothers starting the game in allied transports. Oh well, time for you to actually get creative with deployment and infiltration rather than abusing allies. THE FAQs from GW are all marked as drafts work in progress, so most TO's are not using them yet.

==Gallery==
<gallery>
Image:FFFFFFF.jpg| Someone has a case of the Mondays.
Image:Eversor teaparty.jpg|Eversor Assassins are also known for appearing doing peaceful things, because that's "funny".
Image:Wryyyversor.jpg|This is a sketch, a more detailed picture would show the Eversor on top of a mound of corpses.
Image:Eversor female.jpg| Nothing is sacred, especially when made [[PROMOTIONS|fappable]].
Image:1207366449886.png‎|WRYYY!
Image:GET_IN_THE_BRONCO.png| Turn signals are for ''pussies''.
</gallery>

==See Also==
* [[Core of Brutality]]
* [[Praise the Emperor]], in which we see into the mind of an Eversor assassin.
* [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pywjdJ7P-7o&feature=gp-n-y&google_comment_id=z121drpitzyber0nr22bjd0rgojscrbx004 Eversor Assassin in action]
* [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bK95lWHl7js Eversor`s day off]
* [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Jiizfl9exHM This song sums pretty much everything seen and linked above]
* [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WUhOnX8qt3I One shudders to imagine what inhuman thoughts lie behind that mask...]
{{Template:Imperium}}
[[Category:Stories/Warhammer 40,000]]

Tuska Daemon-Killa

2016-10-15T03:45:15Z

2605:E000:7ECF:7F00:F183:A45C:BAFB:9C5C: /* Krumpin' Time */

Tuska da "Daemon-Killa" is a Ork Warboss who lead an entire [[WAAAGH]] on a goddamn hilarious rampage through the [[Eye of Terror]]. He and his WAAAGH are known for being one of the few explicitly against [[Chaos]], and being one of the most badass snippets of Ork fluff in all of Warhammer 40,000... And that's saying something.

==The Beginning==
Tuska was once a normal Warboss, like you and that git over yonder. He was rolling around the galaxy in his space hulk [[Awesome|''Gorejaw'']], minding their own business... until an unknown many-headed Greater Daemon snuck onboard and started rampaging through the Kroozer, killing anything and anyone in its way. Upon hearing the screams of his Boyz being massacred, Tuska went "ZOG ME, SOUNDS LIKE FUN!", rigged up his Power Klaw, and ran screaming towards the bridge. The resulting battle when he reached the bridge was spectacular, with Tuska nearly dying in the process. After that, Tuska discovered two things:
#Daemon trophies are really fucking cool.
#Daemons are [[Rip and tear|big, killy,]] and a real fun scrap to get into.
So from that point foward, Tuska, now calling himself "Daemon-Killa", made an oath; to kill those squigy Deemuns and have the best damn time of his life while doing it. He then gathered all his [[Weirdboy|Weirdboyz]], and bolted straight for the [[Cadia|Cadian Gate.]] WAAAGH Tuska had begun.

===Prosan===
When Tuska and his retinue reached the Cadian system, Imperial Command freaked the fuck out. With an [[Abaddon|armless superhuman]] and dozens of Chaos cults popping up everyday(as usual), the LAST thing Cadia wanted was to become like [[Armageddon]] with Orks crawling all over it. But to their confusion/relief, the Orks instead assaulted the nearby planet of Prosan. The reason for the confusion was that Prosan was literally just a rock of no strategic value; a hostile planet used by Cadian Guardsmen as training grounds. Still pissed-scared, however, the Imperial Navy intercepted them as the waves of Orks were being thrown at Prosan. The experienced regiments on the planet held the greenskins at bay, but they would soon be overwhelmed if the Orks kept coming.

But as suddenly as they arrived, Tuska and his Boyz picked up sticks and ran straight for the Eye of Terror, much to the ever-growing confusion of the Cadian High Command.
As it turns out, Tuska was using Prosan as a ''warm-up'' for his venture into the Eye of Terror. The Cadian System: one of the most active and heavily defended Imperial systems in the galaxy, was simply '''''practice''''' for Tuska and his Orks. <strike>OI! U MAD, [[Creed|KREED?!]]</strike>{{BLAM|'''*BLAM!* HERESY!}}

On the flip side, Tuska would need all the practice he could fucking get.

==Krumpin' Time==
When Tuska plunged into the Eye, things went batshit real quick. The worlds they saw would've driven any human insane and gibbering dozens of times over... luckily, Orks don't stop to comprehend the Warp or boring shit like that. Because of that, WAAAGH Tuska plowed through several Daemon worlds. Tuska did not segregate about which of the Chaos Gods' domains he trespassed in; crushing crystal worlds made up of [[Just as Planned|pure thought owned by Tzeench]], to jungle worlds infested by temptresses of Slaanesh. This wasn't easy, however, as Tuska's forces slowly dwindled as he conquered various worlds. This didn't deter Tuska. He kept slaughtering every-''goddamn''-thing in his way.

This grand adventure would meet its end on a planet literally made of blood. When the Orks made planetfall, they were met with nothing. Enraged, Tuska shot at the bloody ground with his shoota, and was met with a shake of the planet. He looked at the ground, his Boyz, the ground, and then his Boyz again. He yelled out [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1Io0OQ2zPS4 "FIRE EVERYTIN!'"] All the Orks began firing everything they had at the ground. With a tremble, [[Bloodletter|Bloodletters]] popped up from the surface and rampaged through the mobs of Boyz. All of a sudden, the Khornate [[Daemon Prince]] by the name of the [[Skub|Blood Prince]] (...original, I know), popped up and challenged Tuska.

Tuska and the Blood Prince dueled for hours as Tuska was repeatedly wounded and his Orks dwindled one by one. It climaxed when Tuska was pinned to the ground via a blade through his gut. The Blood Prince roared and proclaimed his victory over Tuska and his fellow Greenskins. Luckily, some of Tuska's Weirdboyz caused a distraction long enough for Tuska to pull one final, amazing act of defiance.

He reached up and (presumably) crushed both of the Blood Prince's daemonic balls with his Power Klaw, causing a ''squish'' loud enough to cause the [[Emperor|Emprah]] to cringe slightly on the Golden Throne. The daemon squealed a high pitched scream similar to that of a Pretty Marine, and Tuska subsequently died from his injuries. TL;DR: It was FUCKING metal as FUCK, dude.

Tuska's story would've ended there if [[Khorne]] himself didn't witness these hilarious shenanigans caused by the Orks. Because of this, he resurrected Tuska and his WAAAGH for them to do battle with his champions and generals every day. With each dawn, Tuska and his Boyz would come back to life, fight and die, and the process would repeat (so basically Valhalla with orks instead of vikings). To anyone else, this would be a never ending hell of violence and dying... but to Tuska, he was ''loving'' it. He could live out his dreams of killing daemons for all eternity in the shadows of Khorne's Brass Citadel. Tuska had come home. TUSKA WILL RETURN, AND HE WILL STOMP DA ENTIRE GALAXIE!!! Which, is not an idle threat at all. Orks get bigger the more they fight, especially when enjoying said fight, and Tuska and his band have been fighting and dying 24 hours a day, seven days a week, in the warp which is a temporal Möbius strip at the best of times. After all that fighting it would not be surprising if they were the size of Dreadnoughts. If for what ever reason they ever left that demon world, maybe Khorne wanted them to krump somebody or he'll stop sending them bloodthirsters to fight him or something, well, Emperor help you. NAH DAT SNOTLING WON'T HELP YA 'E KAN'T EVEN MOVE! HUR HUR HUR.

On the other hand: they may enjoy fighting demons so much, and be so board fighting 'punny ummies' they may just ignore you and focus any nearby demons, making them ork grey (green?) knights.

{{Ork-Gitz}}

Tuska Daemon-Killa

2016-10-15T03:43:47Z

2605:E000:7ECF:7F00:F183:A45C:BAFB:9C5C: /* Krumpin' Time */

Tuska da "Daemon-Killa" is a Ork Warboss who lead an entire [[WAAAGH]] on a goddamn hilarious rampage through the [[Eye of Terror]]. He and his WAAAGH are known for being one of the few explicitly against [[Chaos]], and being one of the most badass snippets of Ork fluff in all of Warhammer 40,000... And that's saying something.

==The Beginning==
Tuska was once a normal Warboss, like you and that git over yonder. He was rolling around the galaxy in his space hulk [[Awesome|''Gorejaw'']], minding their own business... until an unknown many-headed Greater Daemon snuck onboard and started rampaging through the Kroozer, killing anything and anyone in its way. Upon hearing the screams of his Boyz being massacred, Tuska went "ZOG ME, SOUNDS LIKE FUN!", rigged up his Power Klaw, and ran screaming towards the bridge. The resulting battle when he reached the bridge was spectacular, with Tuska nearly dying in the process. After that, Tuska discovered two things:
#Daemon trophies are really fucking cool.
#Daemons are [[Rip and tear|big, killy,]] and a real fun scrap to get into.
So from that point foward, Tuska, now calling himself "Daemon-Killa", made an oath; to kill those squigy Deemuns and have the best damn time of his life while doing it. He then gathered all his [[Weirdboy|Weirdboyz]], and bolted straight for the [[Cadia|Cadian Gate.]] WAAAGH Tuska had begun.

===Prosan===
When Tuska and his retinue reached the Cadian system, Imperial Command freaked the fuck out. With an [[Abaddon|armless superhuman]] and dozens of Chaos cults popping up everyday(as usual), the LAST thing Cadia wanted was to become like [[Armageddon]] with Orks crawling all over it. But to their confusion/relief, the Orks instead assaulted the nearby planet of Prosan. The reason for the confusion was that Prosan was literally just a rock of no strategic value; a hostile planet used by Cadian Guardsmen as training grounds. Still pissed-scared, however, the Imperial Navy intercepted them as the waves of Orks were being thrown at Prosan. The experienced regiments on the planet held the greenskins at bay, but they would soon be overwhelmed if the Orks kept coming.

But as suddenly as they arrived, Tuska and his Boyz picked up sticks and ran straight for the Eye of Terror, much to the ever-growing confusion of the Cadian High Command.
As it turns out, Tuska was using Prosan as a ''warm-up'' for his venture into the Eye of Terror. The Cadian System: one of the most active and heavily defended Imperial systems in the galaxy, was simply '''''practice''''' for Tuska and his Orks. <strike>OI! U MAD, [[Creed|KREED?!]]</strike>{{BLAM|'''*BLAM!* HERESY!}}

On the flip side, Tuska would need all the practice he could fucking get.

==Krumpin' Time==
When Tuska plunged into the Eye, things went batshit real quick. The worlds they saw would've driven any human insane and gibbering dozens of times over... luckily, Orks don't stop to comprehend the Warp or boring shit like that. Because of that, WAAAGH Tuska plowed through several Daemon worlds. Tuska did not segregate about which of the Chaos Gods' domains he trespassed in; crushing crystal worlds made up of [[Just as Planned|pure thought owned by Tzeench]], to jungle worlds infested by temptresses of Slaanesh. This wasn't easy, however, as Tuska's forces slowly dwindled as he conquered various worlds. This didn't deter Tuska. He kept slaughtering every-''goddamn''-thing in his way.

This grand adventure would meet its end on a planet literally made of blood. When the Orks made planetfall, they were met with nothing. Enraged, Tuska shot at the bloody ground with his shoota, and was met with a shake of the planet. He looked at the ground, his Boyz, the ground, and then his Boyz again. He yelled out [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1Io0OQ2zPS4 "FIRE EVERYTIN!'"] All the Orks began firing everything they had at the ground. With a tremble, [[Bloodletter|Bloodletters]] popped up from the surface and rampaged through the mobs of Boyz. All of a sudden, the Khornate [[Daemon Prince]] by the name of the [[Skub|Blood Prince]] (...original, I know), popped up and challenged Tuska.

Tuska and the Blood Prince dueled for hours as Tuska was repeatedly wounded and his Orks dwindled one by one. It climaxed when Tuska was pinned to the ground via a blade through his gut. The Blood Prince roared and proclaimed his victory over Tuska and his fellow Greenskins. Luckily, some of Tuska's Weirdboyz caused a distraction long enough for Tuska to pull one final, amazing act of defiance.

He reached up and (presumably) crushed both of the Blood Prince's daemonic balls with his Power Klaw, causing a ''squish'' loud enough to cause the [[Emperor|Emprah]] to cringe slightly on the Golden Throne. The daemon squealed a high pitched scream similar to that of a Pretty Marine, and Tuska subsequently died from his injuries. TL;DR: It was FUCKING metal as FUCK, dude.

Tuska's story would've ended there if [[Khorne]] himself didn't witness these hilarious shenanigans caused by the Orks. Because of this, he resurrected Tuska and his WAAAGH for them to do battle with his champions and generals every day. With each dawn, Tuska and his Boyz would come back to life, fight and die, and the process would repeat (so basically Valhalla with orks instead of vikings). To anyone else, this would be a never ending hell of violence and dying... but to Tuska, he was ''loving'' it. He could live out his dreams of killing daemons for all eternity in the shadows of Khorne's Brass Citadel. Tuska had come home. TUSKA WILL RETURN, AND HE WILL STOMP DA ENTIRE GALAXIE!!! Which, is not an idle threat at all. Orks get bigger the more they fight, especially when enjoying said fight, and Tuska and his band have been fighting and dying 24 hours a day, seven days a week, in the warp which is a temporal Möbius strip at the best of times. After all that fighting it would not be surprising if they were the size of Dreadnoughts. If for what ever reason they ever left that demon world, maybe Khorne wanted them to krump somebody or he'll stop sending them bloodthirsters to fight him or something, well, Emperor help you. NAH DAT SNOTLING WON'T HELP YA 'E KAN'T EVEN 'OVE! HUR HUR HUR.

On the other hand: they may enjoy fighting demons so much, and be so board fighting 'punny ummies' they may just ignore you and focus any nearby demons, making them ork grey (green?) knights.

{{Ork-Gitz}}

Tuska Daemon-Killa

2016-10-15T03:33:08Z

2605:E000:7ECF:7F00:F183:A45C:BAFB:9C5C: /* Prosan */

Tuska da "Daemon-Killa" is a Ork Warboss who lead an entire [[WAAAGH]] on a goddamn hilarious rampage through the [[Eye of Terror]]. He and his WAAAGH are known for being one of the few explicitly against [[Chaos]], and being one of the most badass snippets of Ork fluff in all of Warhammer 40,000... And that's saying something.

==The Beginning==
Tuska was once a normal Warboss, like you and that git over yonder. He was rolling around the galaxy in his space hulk [[Awesome|''Gorejaw'']], minding their own business... until an unknown many-headed Greater Daemon snuck onboard and started rampaging through the Kroozer, killing anything and anyone in its way. Upon hearing the screams of his Boyz being massacred, Tuska went "ZOG ME, SOUNDS LIKE FUN!", rigged up his Power Klaw, and ran screaming towards the bridge. The resulting battle when he reached the bridge was spectacular, with Tuska nearly dying in the process. After that, Tuska discovered two things:
#Daemon trophies are really fucking cool.
#Daemons are [[Rip and tear|big, killy,]] and a real fun scrap to get into.
So from that point foward, Tuska, now calling himself "Daemon-Killa", made an oath; to kill those squigy Deemuns and have the best damn time of his life while doing it. He then gathered all his [[Weirdboy|Weirdboyz]], and bolted straight for the [[Cadia|Cadian Gate.]] WAAAGH Tuska had begun.

===Prosan===
When Tuska and his retinue reached the Cadian system, Imperial Command freaked the fuck out. With an [[Abaddon|armless superhuman]] and dozens of Chaos cults popping up everyday(as usual), the LAST thing Cadia wanted was to become like [[Armageddon]] with Orks crawling all over it. But to their confusion/relief, the Orks instead assaulted the nearby planet of Prosan. The reason for the confusion was that Prosan was literally just a rock of no strategic value; a hostile planet used by Cadian Guardsmen as training grounds. Still pissed-scared, however, the Imperial Navy intercepted them as the waves of Orks were being thrown at Prosan. The experienced regiments on the planet held the greenskins at bay, but they would soon be overwhelmed if the Orks kept coming.

But as suddenly as they arrived, Tuska and his Boyz picked up sticks and ran straight for the Eye of Terror, much to the ever-growing confusion of the Cadian High Command.
As it turns out, Tuska was using Prosan as a ''warm-up'' for his venture into the Eye of Terror. The Cadian System: one of the most active and heavily defended Imperial systems in the galaxy, was simply '''''practice''''' for Tuska and his Orks. <strike>OI! U MAD, [[Creed|KREED?!]]</strike>{{BLAM|'''*BLAM!* HERESY!}}

On the flip side, Tuska would need all the practice he could fucking get.

==Krumpin' Time==
When Tuska plunged into the Eye, things went batshit real quick. The worlds they saw would've driven any human insane and gibbering dozens of times over... luckily, Orks don't stop to comprehend the Warp or boring shit like that. Because of that, WAAAGH Tuska plowed through several Daemon worlds. Tuska did not segregate about which of the Chaos Gods' domains he trespassed in; crushing crystal worlds made up of [[Just as Planned|pure thought owned by Tzeench]], to jungle worlds infested by temptresses of Slaanesh. This wasn't easy, however, as Tuska's forces slowly dwindled as he conquered various worlds. This didn't deter Tuska. He kept slaughtering every-''goddamn''-thing in his way.

This grand adventure would meet its end on a planet literally made of blood. When the Orks made planetfall, they were met with nothing. Enraged, Tuska shot at the bloody ground with his shoota, and was met with a shake of the planet. He looked at the ground, his Boyz, the ground, and then his Boyz again. He yelled out [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1Io0OQ2zPS4 "FIRE EVERYTIN!'"] All the Orks began firing everything they had at the ground. With a tremble, [[Bloodletter|Bloodletters]] popped up from the surface and rampaged through the mobs of Boyz. All of a sudden, the Khornate [[Daemon Prince]] by the name of the [[Skub|Blood Prince]] (...original, I know), popped up and challenged Tuska.

Tuska and the Blood Prince dueled for hours as Tuska was repeatedly wounded and his Orks dwindled one by one. It climaxed when Tuska was pinned to the ground via a blade through his gut. The Blood Prince roared and proclaimed his victory over Tuska and his fellow Greenskins. Luckily, some of Tuska's Weirdboyz caused a distraction long enough for Tuska to pull one final, amazing act of defiance.

He reached up and (presumably) crushed both of the Blood Prince's daemonic balls with his Power Klaw, causing a ''squish'' loud enough to cause the [[Emperor|Emprah]] to cringe slightly on the Golden Throne. The daemon squealed a high pitched scream similar to that of a Pretty Marine, and Tuska subsequently died from his injuries. TL;DR: It was FUCKING metal as FUCK, dude.

Tuska's story would've ended there if [[Khorne]] himself didn't witness these hilarious shenanigans caused by the Orks. Because of this, he resurrected Tuska and his WAAAGH for them to do battle with his champions and generals every day. With each dawn, Tuska and his Boyz would come back to life, fight and die, and the process would repeat (so basically Valhalla with orks instead of vikings). To anyone else, this would be a never ending hell of violence and dying... but to Tuska, he was ''loving'' it. He could live out his dreams of killing daemons for all eternity in the shadows of Khorne's Brass Citadel. Tuska had come home. TUSKA WILL RETURN, AND HE WILL STOMP DA ENTIRE GALAXIE!!! Which, is not an idle threat at all. Orks get bigger the more they fight,and Tuska and his band have been fighting and dying 24 hours a day, seven days a week, in the warp which is a temporal Möbius strip at the best of times. After all that fighting it would not be surprising if they were the size of Dreadnoughts. If for what ever reason they ever left that demon world, maybe Khorne wanted them to krump somebody or he'll stop sending them bloodthirsters to fight him or something, well, Emperor help you. NAH DAT SNOTLING WON'T HELP YA 'E KAN'T EVEN 'OVE! HUR HUR HUR.

On the other hand: they may enjoy fighting demons so much, and be so board fighting 'punny ummies' they may just ignore you and focus any nearby demons, making them ork grey (green?) knights.

{{Ork-Gitz}}

Dactylis

2016-10-15T02:50:44Z

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[[File:Dactylis CCG.jpg|300px|thumb|left|The Dactylis as it appeared in the CCG.]]
[[File:Dactylis_modern.jpg|300px|right|thumb|What the Dactylis is depicted nowadays.]]
The '''Dactylis''' is a large and somewhat rare [[Tyranid]]. It takes the form of a large slug-like being, sitting at the back of the front lines in a way uncommon with most Tyranids. It uses its two long and multiple-jointed arms to grab parasites called Bile Pods feeding off glands on the back of its cranium and fling them at the enemy, making distinct whip-like cracks with its limbs as it releases them. These Bile Pods then float to the ground much like [[Spore Mine]]s do, moving around in search of a target. Initial forms of these Bile Pods were more or less identical to Poison Spore Mines, but later versions of the Dactylus had spore-generating colonies that create a variety of payload.

Originating in [[Epic]], the Dactylis got itself a set of rules in [[Chapter Approved]] 2001 for 3rd edition [[40k]]. The creature is very useful if you are considering to use a brood of [[Biovore]]s. Cheaper than two of those with the full set of Spore Mines, the Dactylis has two Spore Mine Dischargers that it can shoot twice in one turn for a significant output. It is also quite tough with T6 W3 and a neat 2+ save, making it quite a bit more durable than a Biovore.

However the looks and function of the Dactylis has been overall [[Retcon|retconned]] now. This time, the Dactylis are [[Biovore|Biovores]] on [[-4 Str|Steroids]] and are large enough to be considered as a form of [[Titan (Warhammer 40,000)|Bio-Titan.]] What, you would think that the [[Exocrine]] should fill in that list. Anyways, while its looks and function may differ back in [[Epic]], its role is still the same in that of a Tyranid super-heavy artillery unit.

The Dactylis are nowadays portrayed as a humongous Biovore as previously mentioned. Their forelimbs are now thick and gorilla-like that is covered in extremely heavy bone-plates rather than its previous long, dangly arms. The Dactylis now also spots a more armored and well-rounded head, visible tail, a scything talon on its secondary arms, a ceratopsian-esque head-frill and a EX BAWKS HEUG cannon which fires gigantic Bile Pods.

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