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Fabius Bile

2018-07-22T01:59:52Z

2A01:CB15:140:9200:D562:AA2:AA58:3AA0:

{{heresy}}
[[image:FabulousBile.jpg|thumb|right| Told you.]]
{{topquote|Unlike you, whelp, I once walked the same ground as your Idol. I breathed the same air as him. And I tell you this, without lie or artifice. He never wanted to become what you have made him! He did not wish to be your god-thing. He abhorred such ideals! The slavery of your crippled, blind Imperium would sicken him, if he had eyes to see it.|Fabius Bile, telling it like it is to Rafen of the Blood Angels, Black Tide}}
{{topquote|I was building another science, my science, wild science, robots and lasers and disembodied brains. A science that buzzed and glowed; it wanted to do things. It could get up and walk, fly, fight, sprout garish glowing creations in the remotest parts of the world, domes and towers and architectural fever dreams. And it was angry. It was mad science.|Dr. Impossible - Soon I Will Be Invincible}}

'''Fabius Bile''' (Fabulous Bill or simply "Bob") is the mad scientist to end all mad scientists (since to the [[Haemonculi]] science comes second to pain). He's got a lab coat made of human skin and a pimpin' staff.

<s>He is also absolutely fabulous</s> '''[[BLAM| BLAM!]]''' ''[[BLAM|Heresy!!!]]''.

He has the ability to hook up with a squad and pump them full of his pimp cane juice, making them get on board the Rape Train and head right for the front cabin. His pimp cane also causes Instant Death, though it counts as a regular weapon so anything with decent armor's likely to survive against him (very bad given that counting the CSM codex, six of the armies out right now are [[MEQ]], with the [[Necrons]] also being close behind). Put him in with a squad of Berserkers or Possessed who scored themselves power weapons and stuff them in a Land Raider. It's time to rev the Fun Bus the fuck up and have yourselves a party.

(That said, he's still a pretty sick fuck.)

==The Great Crusade==
Before joining the ill-fated Terran part of the Emperor's Children, Fabius grew up in a wealthy family on Terra, apparently happily. One of his families retainers was a man who created intricate toys of chimerical monstrosities which delighted a young Fabius. He also taught baby Fabi how to alter white mice into performing tricks and theatrical routines, which always went wrong when they reverted to the bestial instincts and tore each other apart. Little Fabius got frustrated with this but the whole thing served as a preface to his later work. Never let it be said that creepy fuckery doesn't start young.

After being inducted into the legion, Fabius swiftly rose through the ranks and became the [[Apothecary|Chief Apothecary]]. Before [[Fulgrim]] was rediscovered, the legion was afflicted by a degenerative geneseed flaw known as the Blight - a progressive form of cancer that caused random tumors in both bones and organs. Fabius was tasked with finding a cure, lest the flaw wipe out the Emperor's Children to a man. He gradually became more morose as his work only led to failure (as well as prompting his future experimental streak). All the Terran marines of the Legion were susceptible to the disease and Fabius was forced to euthanize a lot of his friends and comrades, leading to him seeking solitude away from his battle-brothers.

It turns out that a cure was ''never'' actually found, and that reuniting with their Primarch on Chemos (really GW? You literally put the cancer marines on chemo? - The homeworld was named before the blight part of the fluff was fleshed out.) only served to provide fresh material for "untainted" Space Marines. All those who suffered the flaw were put to death in an attempt to prevent any infection from reaching the healthy brethren... Except for Fabius himself who was in a position to falsify his medical records. His prognosis was that he only had about a year to live, but had developed a process of temporarily rejuvenating himself using elixirs distilled from enzymes and proteins drawn from [[Grimdark|dead Astartes]], and quite possibly including those who never even suffered the flaw either.

The Legion as a whole had a obsession with perfection as a general concept but Fabius' first forays into bodily experimentation came when the Legion assaulted Laeran, a world of reptilian creatures who were gene-engineered to perfectly carry out a specific task. Bewitched by the idea, Fabius eventually began to perform discrete experiments on trying to improve the [[gene-seed]] even before the [[Horus Heresy]] started. It didn't take long for [[Fulgrim]] to find out, but he gave Fabius his blessing as long as it didn't bring Imperial censure upon the Legion. Of course, once the Heresy was underway, prudence and discretion were thrown to the wind and Fabius' enhancements became in high demand amongst the Emperor's Children.

During the opening movements of the Isstvaan Massacre (taking place before the actual murder-party itself) Fabius ended up saving the life of Nathaniel Garro, who would eventually go on to alert the [[Imperium]] to the Heresy. In retrospect that would probably make Fabius a dead man walking otherwise.

==The Heresy==
After turning full traitor, Fabulous Vile became the go-to guy for any kind of enhancement, to the extent that there were not many Emperor's Children in the legion who had not been under his knives in some form or other. He was part of the inner cabal of legion figureheads who attempted to exorcise Fulgrim and even found the time to fiddle around with mixing geneseed together (something unheard of at the time), eventually leading to a certain fellow called [[Honsou]]. He toyed around with both the original anathame and the incomplete (and corrupted) Primarch genome data [[Omegon]] [[Blood Ravens|'acquired']] from the [[Raven Guard]]. It was during this time that he first started on his hobby of turning men, and women, and traitor Marines and [[troll|loyalist Marines]] and basically anything that had the misfortune of coming into contact with him into horrifying inhuman monsters, something he refined considerably over the following millennia.

When Fulgrim was being mopey over the death of his once-BFF [[Ferrus Manus]], it was Fabius that tried to clone the dead Primarch back to life so Fulgrim and him could be BFF again... Except even the clones of Ferrus refused to turn to Chaos and had to be killed by Fulgrim, to the latter's unending [[butthurt]] and [[rage]]. (He believed Fabius was producing flawed clones on purpose just to spite him, [[derp|yet kept on ordering him to create more!]]). It was from this episode that he received his surname from a daemon ascended Fulgrim, who accused him of being "full of bile". Somehow, Chaos Gods know why, the name stuck.

At some point in the Heresy, Fabius did something unprecedented outside of the most twisted fan-fiction. He created a "daughter", from his own gene code, which he named Melusine. At the time, she was the pinnacle of his work on creating life but something in her making went horribly wrong and Fulgrim ordered her to be cast into the warp out of fear of what she might become. Let that sink in for a bit. Melusine then went on to wander the realm of Slaanesh, where she became demonic in the process. She would occasionally give vague warnings to Fabius in the future, holding some loyalty to her "father".

==Post-Heresy==
While the Emperor's Children became wholehearted devotees of [[Slaanesh]], Fabius didn't turn into a hedonistic sense addict but rather rejected the [[Chaos Gods]] despite being aligned to Chaos. To Fabius, Chaos was but a tool; the means to an end. Still, at first he stuck with his Legion. Because the Emperor's Children weren't much involved in the actual siege of Emperor's Palace itself [[Grimdark|(they were too busy butchering civilians)]], they were in a strong position during the "Legion Wars" that raged in the Eye of Terror after the Heresy and could supply Fabius with what he needed.

Despite their relative strength, the legion itself was divided between following Fulgrim, [[Eidolon]], and [[Lucius]] and soon earned the ire of all other Traitor Legions due to their nasty habit of raiding them for slaves. Nevertheless, the Emperor's Children had some successes, leading them to defeat the [[Sons of Horus]] and Fabius retrieving the Warmaster's body. Horus' body provided him with a wealth of information on top of what he'd gotten from Omegon and the body of Ferrus Manus, and he succeeded in creating a viable albeit diminished 'clone' of the Warmaster (Horus' soul being annihilated by Big.E prevented a complete resurrection). Emboldened, Fabius then attempted to create clones of all of the Primarchs and live up to his self-proclaimed title of 'Primogenitor'. He was well on his way to succeed, too, but then [[Abaddon]] arrived to fuck his shit up. Horus' clone was killed by Abaddon and Fabius' labs utterly ruined even though he managed to escape.

After the Legion stronghold of Harmony [[Battle of Harmony|was destroyed]] by the nascent [[Black Legion]] and Fulgrim went AWOL (either doing drugs with his patron God/dess and/or having fun on his personal planet), Fabius was one of the few authority figures left capable of keeping things together. Many looked to the mad scientist to take command of what was left of the Emperor's Children Legion. Fabius, at that point completely estranged from them, refused. Command would only be a burden keeping him from his research. Eventually, the rest of the Emperor's Children drove Fabius out of the Legion, but by that point his skill in cloning meant that he had plenty of opportunities to gain new subjects for experimentation while providing clones for the remaining [[Chaos Space Marines]] to make recruits from. Fabius Bile became a free agent, obeying none but himself and his hunger for knowledge; staying alive and free by offering his services as an Apothecary.

An amusing 'anecdote' about Bile, that just shows how fabulous he is, is that (like his old pal Lucius), he got himself captured by the [[Dark Eldar]] at one point after the Heresy. Instead of pissing himself in fear at the thought of whatever awaited them like every other prisoner, he just frowned with annoyance at the setback and kept on experimenting. On his fellow prisoners. With whatever he had on hand. This unusual behaviour made [[Haemonculus|another bunch of sick fucks]] raise an eyebrow in curiosity and they invited the 'mere mon-keigh' for a pleasant chat between academics. Although Bile was but a novice at cutting and reshaping things painfully compared to the haemonculi, his knowledge of the Warp allowed him to conclude a mutually beneficent pact with them. He concocted an elixir that allowed the haemonculi to [[grimdark|craft and keep alive a mobile tower made of the flesh and bones of their still-living victims]], giving them a base of operations that existed in constant agony and fed their shrivelled souls. In exchange, they let Fabius go unharmed after giving him a few pointers for his own research. Yup. Bile managed to be enough of a sick fuck that even a bunch of the most twisted Dark Eldar nodded in appreciation.

==Present Day==
Bile has kept himself busy since leaving the Emperor's Children behind. Most of his time is spent on the world of Urum, where he set up a loose organisation called the Consortium, a research facility / playground / artist's commune for other Chaos Apothecaries to practice their art in relative peace (and also partly addressing why there aren't many Apothecaries in the Traitor Legions any more). Despite having only very little time to live during the Heresy, he's survived through the millennia by cloning and jumping bodies on a regular basis, although the flaw in his geneseed will keep on being replicated and get progressively worse. He estimates that he'll only live for another few centuries, which he'll spend finding a cure and finishing his great work.

A major part of his "great work" is to create and perfect a new human race - the imaginatively named "New Men" - who would be superior to the Astartes and reclaim the galaxy from both chaos and xenos. The closest attempt he's made thus far are known as Glandhounds - men AND women who are far stronger and more intelligent than regular humans, have very strong pack instincts and use them to bring down much larger prey. Like Traitor Astartes Fabius doesn't like. Unlike other examples of master-race creators in fiction, he seems entirely unconcerned about being the ruler of the new race or even being around himself when it comes about. It doesn't sound like a bad idea in itself but it goes without saying that old humanity would not be permitted to coexist with his new race. It's partly why he allows Nurgulite apothecaries to join his Consortium, as their work on viruses and plagues would allow him to clear out old humanity before letting his New Men move in, all inoculated naturally.

It's hinted that he may have had something to do with the [[Obliterators|Obliterator virus]] (aka the turn-your-body-into-a-living-cannon virus) and there are rumors that he had a hand in screwing up the [[21st Founding]] as well, although this hasn't been mentioned in canon past oblique references.

Bile isn't a fan of Chaos, mainly for its role in destroying what little cohesion the Emperor's Children had post-Heresy. He also sees its corrupting influence as running counter to his great work. He's also critical of the [[Emperor]] (beyond the usual traitor reasons) for stifling the growth of humanity as a psychic race. Fabius is [[Communism|oddly egalitarian]] for a mad scientist, complaining that the Emperor was foolish to only let geneseed work on men. Another point about him is that due to his attitude towards the Chaos Gods and his focus on science, he is the only known Chaos Space Marine that has kept faithful to the tenets of the [[Imperial Truth]], even though he no longer faithful to the Imperium or the Emperor. He believes that what men call "Chaos Gods" are truly just mindless cosmic forces that are ascribed personalities by those driven insane by the Warp, and that Daemons are entities that, although seeming to be intelligent, ultimately lack self-awareness.

The sheer irony that Fabious Bile of all people is trying to save humanity from Chaos and aliens and to push humanity forward into a new state of power which would ensure mankind's survival and dominance is just...holy shit. So, doesn't that make him secretly a good guy? Just in "the ends justify the means" taken up way past eleven. More like past nine thousand with some of the nauseating stuff he's done.

He has an odd place in the very loose and volatile hierarchy of the Traitor Legions, being both incredibly unpopular (he is wanted dead by the Dark Council of the [[Word Bearers]] and Fulgrim himself, isn't exactly on good terms with Abaddon after his Horus-cloning shenanigans and portions of almost every other Traitor Legion would appreciate [[rip and tear|voicing their viewpoint on his work ethics tactfully]]) and highly in demand for his skills (his knowledge of geneseed has saved more than one Traitor Legion from going completely extinct on multiple occasions). In other words, he's the smug, insufferable old coot everyone hates, but the guy is just too damn useful and knowledgeable to be retired.

As with a lot of big characters from earlier editions, his portrayal in the fluff is pretty inconsistent, varying between cackling mad scientist, sadistic torturer for the giggles, stern extremist, goal-obsessed manipulator, and weirdly paternal visionary. One audio adaptation gives him a thetting lisp, which is bafflingly amusing when imagining a space marine, let alone one using sexual torture devices on a Primarch. Then again, he is jumping bodies a lot..

Since the introduction of the [[Primaris Marines]] he has become obsessed with getting his hands on them, so he can experiment and created his own "improved" versions of them.

==Send in the Clones==
Bile has a hard-on for cloning technology, and has a track record for making copies of himself and others. The latest fluff reveals that he is patterning and copying his mind over to fresh bodies and has done so hundreds of times over the years. The direct implication of this is that the original Bile probably died a long time ago and that there could even be more than one Bile going around the Galaxy. It also explains why he keeps cloning himself into his own Blight ravaged body - he would be more than capable of making a far better body but then he wouldn't be certain that the new body wouldn't effect his mind and go off and do something different, contrary to his great work.

His first attempt was actually to clone [[Ferrus Manus]] since [[Fulgrim]] was feeling a bit guilty and wanted a do-over on turning his brother to chaos, though Fulgrim would keep murdering the clones because they wouldn't take the hint and change sides. Predictably, Fulgrim blamed Fabius for this, claiming a "perfect" clone would have been willing to join the Traitors.

He later stole [[Horus|Horus's]] corpse and cloned it repeatedly, an act that pushed [[Abaddon]] out of his emo loser phase into becoming the scourge of the Imperium. Really though, Abaddon was just annoyed that Fabius has like four arms. He got round to attempting to clone every other primarch as well, but all but one turned out to be a failure. The one successful one was, to no ones great surprise, of Fulgrim and was genuinely an absolutely perfect and uncorrupted replica of the original. Fabius originally considered using him and a batch of pre heresy uncorrupted geneseed to make a new legion to protect his New Men whilst they colonised the galaxy but when he discovered that clone Fulgrim wanted to use them as lesser, expendable soldiers for galactic conquest he offered up the clone to Trazyn the Infinite's collection.

He's currently attempting to create a Clone of the [[God-Emperor of Mankind|EMPRAH]]. Using [[Sanguinius]]' blood. Let it never be said that Chaos is nothing if not ambitious. The [[Blood Angels]] managed to kill him and get the blood back, but he had already begun developing the clone at that point. And as it turns out, they didn't kill him due to the numerous clones of himself he has secreted throughout the galaxy. Mind you, it's not just a way for him to fuck with his enemies; he still hasn't figured out how to cure the Blight and needs to shunt his mind from one clone body to another to keep it from killing him. Also, keep in mind that if he doe succeed in cloning the Emperor a new body (because we all know Big.E. would hijack that for himself), it probably would end absolutely horribly for Chaos. Especially considering how things went with the Ferrus Manus clones. (Although this might be entirely intentional on Bile's part, given his hatred of Chaos.)

==Crunch==
On one hand, Bile has good stats and wargear: Feel No Pain through his Chirurgeon, Strength 5, a weapon that causes instant death (Rod of Torment), five attacks, and a particularly nasty poisoned weapon in the Xyclos Needler. On the other hand, his Rod of Torment does not ignore armor saves (unlike, say, the MURDER SWORD), his Xyclos Needler has really bad AP and sub-par range, and perhaps most damning of all, no Invulnerable save, unlike literally every other Chaos Character in the codex. So... Sucks, Right? Not quite. The reason Fabius Bile is taken, ironically, isn't for Bile himself; it's for his Enhanced Warriors trait, which gives a unit of Chaos Space Marines +1 Strength and Fearless. An enhanced Khornate CSM unit (Mark + Icon) rolls out 4 S6 attacks per Marine on the charge while being scoring and Fearless. While he isn't stellar in a normal CSM army (he's not a fighter nor does he enhance more than one unit of CSM), he really shines as an allied HQ — if you want a reasonably cheap CC threat for your pansy blueberries, take him and a 10-strong unit of Khornate CSM with meltaguns that can threaten massed infantry with the number of attacks, massed tanks with meltaguns/carnage combo and monstrous creatures with that Instant Death stick. Know that a Disordered Charge (aka multi-charge) denies you your Rage, so plan accordingly.
Note that he can enhance one CSM unit in your entire ARMY, so take him in an Auxiliary Detachment for your Traitor Legion, and buff one of their Legion CSM units. 20 Infiltratring S5 Fearless Alpha Legion CSM anyone?

===8th Edition===
The news of improved Astartes was just the news he needed to pop back up. He has a 3-shot needle pistol that always wounds things that aren't vehicles on a 2+, as well as his Rod of Torment which is now S:User AP-1 D3 damage (except when attacking vehicles, which it only does 1 damage to.) Though he still lacks any kind of invuln, he now automatically regenerates d3 wounds at the start of each turn, giving him a bit of staying power. And as always, he can enhance a single infantry unit; roll a dice for each model in the unit, 6s are mortal wounds. The survivors either gain +1 to Strength, Toughness, or Attacks. Keen-eyed Chaos Lords will note that this can no longer be exclusively done to Chaos Marines. Yes, you can enhance a 20-man Berzerker or Possessed squad. Have fun!

{{Chaos-Marines}}

Creed

2018-07-20T19:10:49Z

2A01:CB15:140:9200:D562:AA2:AA58:3AA0: Undo revision 507135 by 2A02:A452:6BC3:1:A897:B27C:5A94:F967 (talk)

{{awesome}}

[[Image:Creed.jpg|thumb|right|And you thought [[Vance Motherfucking Stubbs]] was manly.]]
[[File:Tzeentch's_True_Form.png|thumb|right|[[Tzeentch|What Creed Pretends to be.]]]]
'''Ursarkar E. Creed''' is a Lord General of the [[Imperial Guard]] and the current Lord Castellan of [[Cadia]] (even though Cadia was destroyed) who is such a tactical genius he may somehow infiltrate ANY unit onto a battlefield (as if it were using the Scouts special rule). Even vehicles. Even SQUADRONS of vehicles. Apparently even [[Titan]]s, and Living Saints. [[What|The only thing his genius can't handle is cavalry, since it wouldn't make sense for them to be scouts.]] This can cause considerable confusion and consternation to opposing forces as, for example, a 45 foot tall Warhound reveals itself from behind a small bush (hey its a SCOUT titan), or they notice that the door they just attempted to open was in fact a Baneblade, leading them to curse the tactical genius of their enemy with cries of "CREEEEEEEEEEEEEEED!"

His miniature is actually based around British Wartime Prime Minister Winston Churchill, he's also a manly looking, cigar-chomping motherfucker with a coat so huge its collar obscures all peripheral vision. Presumably he wears it due to a lack of power armor, which normally fulfills this function by virtue of [[pauldrons]]. In addition to that, he also carries not one, but TWO motherfucking [[Hellgun|hellpistols]] in combat, just to show everyone that he's that pimping.

Ironically, while for the fandom Creed has been ''the'' Lord Castellan of Cadia for several editions (and give or take two decades), in-universe Creed has only had the job for, at ''best'', a few weeks. Sadly for him, his tenure as overall commander of Cadia was cut short when (due to the timeline recently advancing) Abaddon's forces steamrolls its way through the planetary forces and finally lands a killing blow on the planet.

As for Creed himself? There's a high chance he's now part of [[Trazyn the Infinite]]'s collection for the Fall of Cadia.

==Creed & 4chan==
Creed has woven his very essence into /tg/ through the tactical skills he possesses. /tg/ is now clearly known to stand for Tactical Genius, and not Traditional Games as many have previously thought. Only a tactical genius could accomplish this. Likewise, only a tactical genius could have hidden the entire Cadian 8th in 4chan's interwebzserver boxes to surprise ambush the maintenance shift and bring 4chan down.

In fact, it's probably the best meme /tg/ has created for some time now. Seriously, sometimes one might believe that it could have only been started by some kind of tactical geniu-

CREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEED!
<div style="text-align:right; font-style:italic;">..........Tactical genius hrrrrr......</div>

==FALL OF CREED==
{{MattWard}}
Sadly, due to [[Matt Ward|this douche]], Creed is no longer the Tactical Genius extraordinaire, as his ability has been co-opted by the Fifth-Edition [[Grey Knights]], who can Scout up to three units. God ''damn'' it, [[Games Workshop]]. That said, the original CREEEEEEEEED!-like ability was the ''Second Edition'' generic Imperial Assassin; before the Polymorphine wargear card was replaced with one specific to the Callidus Assassin, it wasn't entirely abnormal for a Gretchin to suddenly become an Imperial Assassin in Terminator Armour riding a bike.

In Creed's defense, this is at least fluff-inconsistent; the [[Grey Knights]] are highly brainwashed troops, who obey every single command to the letter, without showing personal initiative. Creed, on the other hand, gets to work with Imperial Guardsmen, who, unlike Grey Knights, actually have an in-game mechanic for following orders, they do it so much. Also, Creed isn't using bullshit tricks like being psychic or [[Khornate Knights|killing off a ton of friendly Adeptae Kitchenates to fight demons]].

Besides which, the [[Grey Knights]] can't scout vehicles, so Creed is still the only source of Titans hiding behind waist-high fences.

Also, who do you think taught them their Tactical Genius to begin with?

==RESHUFFLING OF CREED==

And then Sixth Edition happened. Creed's power became a IG exclusive Warlord Trait. Now any Guard Commander <s> who rolls right </s> who was, in fact, Creed all along is a Tactical Genius. Also, Creed gets to roll for two Warlord Traits now, so he gets double chance to Outflank shit compared to everyone else. It should be noted that the Warlord Trait in question works on D3 units from the same <s>Codex as Creed - so no more outflanking Titans, but maybe outflanking cavalry. All in all, not all is lost.</s> It says from the same primary detachment! Slap that Imperator in you LoW slot, and you are good to go!

==NO?, YES? Maybe?==
In 8th Creed has lost the ability to scout units, but instead of hiding [[Baneblade]]s behind fences, he can now hide a hit inside your miss, or hide a lascannon shot inside the enemy's vehicles, or even hide extra guardsmen in your guardsmen squad!! I know not as cool as scouting titans but arguably more useful {{BLAM}} NO ARGUING. He now gives two extra command points which is pretty ok but the best part is to tell your opponent who has 4 or 6 command points that you brought 14! (in combination wit a brigade detachment)... and then with the release of the IG Codex the Creed ability returned... as a Tallarn exclusive strategem. Also it only works for things with the Tallarn Keyword, meaning you can't sneak warhound titans behind enemy lines. You can still sneak Baneblades in though.

==In Fantasy/Age of Sigmar==
Vlad von Carstein in [[Warhammer: Total War]] has the special ability to treat any unit in his army as if were scouting units. While this wasn't present in the tabletop (especially since Vlad's been squatted), it does allow for some hilarious shenanigans. Especially since it makes getting his unique weapon a breeze.

However moving on to Age of Sigmar, the Slann Kuoteq seems to be the Creed of the new setting. In his debut story "The Temple of Dead Gods", he cleverly snuck a battalion of Saurus Knights, Stegadons, Bastilladons and Carnosaurs onto a Slaaneshi army's flank by hiding thim in an inch deep reflecting pool. TWICE. Later upon the release of the General's Handbook 2017 Kuoteq received stats, including an ability that allows him to summon any Saurus unit without having to make a roll. As many times as he likes regardless of his usual 3 spells per turn limit. In fact these spells do not count, meaning you can summon an army and still have enough spells to blast the enemy and shield your forces. The only restrictions are that he can't use the same spell twice in one turn, and that they have to be Saurus units. (No summoning Dread Saurians without a roll sadly.) Still, feel free to snap a pic of your opponent's face when he realizes that what he thought was a small patch of grass was actually a pair of Carnosaur riders backed up by a legion of Saurus Knights and Temple Guards. To pull that off, you would have to be some kind of master of celestial magi-KUOTEEEEEEEQ!!!

==Writefaggotry!==
{{story}}
"So. Fresh bunch'a recruits straight off the regimental home world, huh? Got your heads full of propaganda and not much else, lemme bet. Well, listen to me and listen good, kids - probably half of what you know is nothing but ambull-shit, and you'd better get that through your heads now rather than getting a traitor's lasbolt through your head on the battlefield. Now, you pray to the Emperor like you should, and if you don't the Commissar'll blow your head off, and that'll be a mercy compared to what I'll do to ya if I find out 'fore he does - but don't be thinkin' for a second that recitin' the Litany of Protection makes you invulnerable on a battlefield.

Sure, you'll hear stories about brave Guardsmen that charged enemy positions armed with nothin' but their lasguns and their bayonets and won - and I'll even admit that probably a couple of them are true, but in an army that numbers in the billions one or two of ya are bound to get lucky every now and again, so it don't really say much. No, kids, they might make for inspirin' stories, but fanatical charges aren't what win battles. Battles are won by determination and tactics. Lemme tell you about this one time our regiment was servin' under the command of General Creed.

Never a finer tactician has the Imperial Guard ever seen than that General Creed, let me tell you. He came up with plans so devious and cunnin' you didn't even have a hope of figurin' out how he'd done what he'd done 'less he explained it to ya himself. We were fightin' on Kavara IV, what'd used to be a good Imperial world till the taint of Chaos found its way down there and turned loyal citizens into traitorous scum. At the time we'd been shipped off, we thought we were just gonna be helping the local PDF put down a small insurrection, but what with the ways of the warp by the time we got there it'd turned into a full on rebel uprisin' and all the nobles were already dead or in hidin', and another army led by General Creed had arrived to bring it back under control - we'd been missin' so long they thought we'd been lost to the warp, you see, and sent another off in our place - so we wound up joinin' forces an' bolsterin' their ranks.

Now, we got deployed into one of the urban centers that'd been taken over almost entirely by the heretics, goin' through clearing buildings of resistance and tightenin' the noose around their filthy necks. Only been gettin' minor resistance until a couple of hours in, when we stumbled across a fortified plaza that hadn't been in none of the intelligence reports. So there we were, pinned down by enemy fire, usin' rubble for cover and hopin' to the Emperor that'd we get some artillery support soon, when all of a sudden there's a tremendous rumblin' off to the right, soundin' like a column of tanks comin' up towards the buildin' we'd just cleared.

We weren't gettin' nothin' about armored support on the vox, so we was sittin' there shittin' ourselves wonderin' where the traitors had got tanks from, when all of a sudden the front of the buildin' just collapses out onto the street and a damn Baneblade rolls right on out in front of us. One blast from the main gun and it turned the heretic's position into a crater. The vox lights up and we get ourselves a message - "Armored Support courtesy of General Creed", they say. Now that's tactics, kids - we never saw it comin', so those traitors sure didn't. The application of overwhelmin' force at just the right spot at just the right moment'll turn the tide of any battle in your favor.

I took a look at that buildin' again as we were marchin' down the street in the Baneblade's wake, though. Funniest thing, the only hole in it was the one the tank'd made on its way out. How the hell we missed it when we were clearin' the place I don't know. How the hell Creed got it in there in the first place, I'm not sure I WANT to know - but let me tell you, pulling that off must've taken one hell of a tactical genius."

-Sergeant Karls addressing new recruits to the Hirian 204th, shortly before being relieved of duty and sent for psychiatric evaluation due to inexplicable urges to scream incoherently.

=== Tactical Genius ===
The forces of Chaos reigned victorious over the shattered city, littered with the wounded and dying Guardsmen of the Cadian 503rd. At their head, ready to deliver the killing blow to the last world between him and conquest, strode Abaddon the Despoiler himself, his Daemonblade screaming as it claimed the souls of a score of men, slashing through the staunch but futile defenses of his feeble foe. He had won. Finally, after all these centuries, he had triumphed, and begun to finish what that weakling Horus had started! And now, now it was time to put the icing on the cake, and finish off that arrogant son of a bitch Creed, as he routed like a coward nonetheless!

Beside him, his lieutenants roared in delight, cleaving through flesh and bone and steel alike, and his bodyguard made a mockery of Imperial pride. Demons from the warp, incarnations of the entropy of Khorne and Slaanesh hacked their way through droves of fleeing shock troopers, and a flanking force of the Night Lords penned in those who were left, trapping them in a great valley.

His final carnage began in a great valley, the product of a near miss by a melta torpedo. A miss that had spared the Imperials yesterday, but sealed their fates tonight! Abaddon flung himself into the fray, cleaving with full strokes the men who stood in between him and his prey, butchering wholesale with his men. The Cadians fought like men possessed, like monsters cornered. Abaddon's men were possessed, monsters in truth as well as metaphor, and so fought harder still. When the last corpse fell, it was Abaddon who laid it low, sending that cloak, that cigar spinning to the ground with a backhand from his mighty palm. The heavyset, gray-haired man lay flat upon the graying mud, and a pool of blood grew around him. Abaddon felt his breath quicken, and kicked the Castellan over, to see his face as the Daemonblade consumed his soul.

"I've won, Creed! I've beaten you, the Imperium is MINE for the taking! [[Horus|The galaxy shall burn!]] But not before I hear you beg, NOT BEFORE I HEAR YOU BEG!" His voice was torn with emotion, manic laughter struggled free of his throat.
The figure tipped over, to lay spread eagle on its back. Silent, broken, and dead. An old man, slain by a casual blow from an immortal warrior. Abaddon felt something leave him. The rush vanished. Creed was dead. He had won... Yes. He had defeated the hero of the Imperium, but Creed was dead. And without ever even knowing that Abaddon had won. The united leader of Chaos knelt down, and screamed at the square-jawed corpse, howling in anger, in the hopes that perhaps his fleeting soul could still hear his words. "I. HAVE. WON. CR-" He froze mid-word, as he realized that the crater was silent. He stood, and thought for a moment that his men were watching him. He was mistaken, for his marines, his warriors, his cultists... Even the demons, were staring open-mouthed, at the crest of the crater that they had swept into.

For one nanosecond. For one fleeting, cursory micron of an instant, Abaddon was confused.

And then he knew. He knew what he would see when he looked up to match their gaze. He knew what he would see when he looked up, and realized why Creed had led this defensive force personally, and why he had not boarded one of the Valkyries that had escaped, or a Chimera to flee. He looked up, to see the barrels of a thousand tanks, the crested figures of ten thousand men, the whirring shapes of countless hundreds of skimmers and fighters. He saw in the distance, the smoking ruin of [[Vengeful Spirit|his flagship]] drifting through orbit a hundred miles away, and heard all of a sudden the unjammed signals of panicked screaming coming in from every one of his officers and aides.

[[Image:EvenInDeathIStillCREEEEEED.jpg|thumb|right|''And he knew, without looking, the expression upon that fat old man's face, despite the shattered jaw and the broken neck.'']]

Abaddon saw, before his eyes, his Crusade crumble. And he knew, without looking, the expression upon that fat old man's face, despite the shattered jaw and the broken neck. And he felt his last emotion before the guns started firing, and the torpedoes struck, and the lascannon-bolts flew. Boiling up inside of him, he opened his mouth, and screamed.
And over the din of battle, though battle cannon roared and [[basilisk]] whistled, though lasgun cracked and Guardsmen cried out with tears in their eyes the name of their savior, no voice cried so loudly as Abaddon the Fool's, whose hatred of one man had cost him a victory that could have changed the galaxy, the one man whose name he now invoked. That magnificent bastard. That tactical geniu-

"CREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEED!!!!!!"

===The Game===
The mortal moved his piece. Tzeentch, Lord of Change and Master of Destinies moved his. They were playing a game of chess. The stakes were high: if the mortal won, Tzeentch, all his daemons and followers would retreat to the Warp for all time and would never again attempt to harry the mighty Imperium of Man in any way be it directly or indirectly. If Tzeentch won (which, of course, he knew he would), the soul of the mortal went to Tzeentch. These stakes obviously seemed skewed in favor of the mortal, but there were several factors to consider.

The mortal moved another piece.

Tzeentch moved another piece.

Tzeentch had wanted this particular soul for what might have been 10 million years, or maybe 5 minutes. Who could tell in the Warp? The problem was, it was pledged to the accursed corpse-god on Terra. So Tzeentch had sought him out and challenged him.

The mortal moved.

Tzeentch moved.

Also Tzeentch, as Master of Fates, knew that he would win. He had to. He had been planning for this game for centuries before the mortal in question was ever born. He had watched, planned, schemed, and acted to ensure that the mortal would learn a certain chess strategy, one that he just "happened" to have a perfect counter to.

Another move by the mortal.

Another move by Tzeentch.

Finally, the idea of a Chaos God focusing so much on a single soul, or making such an enormous bargain was inconceivable, a fact that had never once changed, not even for Warmaster Horus. What was Tzeentch, if not the Lord of Change? So went the reasoning (if the thought process of a Chaos God can be called such) of Tzeentch.

The mortal went on for several turns.

Tzeentch went on for several turns.

Finally, the mortal got a smug look on his face. Tzeentch's beak curled into something resembling a smile.He held his head up high. The mortal moved a piece. Tzeentch spoke, in a voice that was ever shifting and could drive men mad.

"Mortal, do you not know who I am? Let me tell you. I am Tzeentch. The Changer of Ways. The Master of Fate. The Lord of Change. The Controller of Destinies. I have existed before the stars, and I will exist long after they have died. No mere mortal could possibly-"

Then Tzeentch spared a glance at the board.

"What is that knight doing there?"

Tzeentch stared, utterly dumbstruck. His eyes bulged and his beak dropped. He saw the reason for the mortal's smugness.

[[Image:CreedvTzeentch.png|thumb|right|''Tzeentch let out a cry of rage. It was a cry that echoed throughout the Warp, driving Imperial psykers insane and Chaos sorcerers more insane.'']]It was checkmate.

A very small part of Tzeentch was glad. After all, being unintentionally defeated was certainly a change for him. Also, no longer interfering in the affairs of the mortal galaxy was definitely a change.

However, that was just a very small part.

Tzeentch let out a cry of rage. It was a cry that echoed throughout the Warp, driving Imperial psykers insane and Chaos sorcerers more insane. It was a cry containing a subconscious command. All across the galaxy, the daemons of Tzeentch vanished from the material world, never to return. His mortal followers began retreating, heading towards the Eye of Terror. All the Gods, daemons, and mortal followers of Chaos took notice. In the Warp near Terra, the mighty soul of the God-Emperor of Mankind himself took notice. He smiled, for he knew what it meant. It was a cry that was to echo in the Warp throughout eternity, long after the stars themselves died. It was the cry of a defeated god.

"CREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEED!"

==A Record of Historic Significance==
There is an example of real-world tactical genius that took place during granpappy's WWII, though it was performed not by a manly cigar-chomping motherfucker but rather by a man named Jasper Maskelyne, a British stage magician who was recruited by Britain's MI9 to assist with camouflage development. One account (which has had trouble being verified admittedly, but then many files are still classified from that era) claimed that he was able to hide an entire desert convoy by deploying ultra-bright "dazzle-lights" which blinded recon planes being used by the enemy. However, many of his claims have been thoroughly scrutinized and most seem to be tall tales.

Whatever the story may be the lesson to learn from it is never ask Creed to pull a rabbit out of his hat. He will instead pull a [[Slaanesh|Baneblade out of your ass.]]

There is also the story about how the Allies managed to dupe Germans into believing they were going to land their invasion at [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pas_de_Calais Pas-de-Calais], at the narrowest point of the British Channel, codenamed [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Operation_Fortitude Operation Fortitude]. They built entire fake bases, complete with wireless traffic, nonsense but believable orders, and dummy transport aircraft, and placed General Patton at the "head" of this fake [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/First_United_States_Army_Group 1st US Army Group]. They also made use of captured German double agents, codenamed [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Double-Cross_System Double-Cross] ([[Alpha_Legion|XX]]) System, along with diplomatic channels with neutral countries, to feed Nazis more misinformation, and used [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ultra_(cryptography) Ultra] decryption to confirm they had fallen for it. Indeed, Hitler himself ordered to hold up some German divisions as a reserve for this fictional Calais landing, and Rommel gave the reinforcement of the [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Atlantic_Wall Atlantic Wall] defenses in that region top priority. It was so believable that when [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Operation_Neptune Operation Neptune] commenced and D-Day landings began, the Germans thought it was a diversion, not the main attack, and so did not commit their reserves until the Allies had already established a full front in Normandy.

So it can be said that the Allies managed to CREEEEEEED their troops into France.

===Fall of Cadia===
Creed loses a hand fighting Abaddon. And nearly loses his life as the armless wonder chokes him. But an expertly infiltrated Celestine back stabs the Failure, and Creed lives. Despite Creed losing, you have to think about it this way; a human stood up to a Space Marine, in Terminator Armor, with the full power of Chaos powering him. (*cough* [[Ollanius Pius]], anyone?*cough*)

Creed stays behind with the rest of the 8th Cadian force to hold off the tide of Daemons as Cadia collapses into pieces. Later, he wanders through the destroyed landscape, slowly succumbing to his wounds. Trazyn notices that a wild Creed appeared, and captures him in a pokeball. (Not the best end, but without Trazyn, Creed would've died in the Eye of Terror.) NOTE: This is not yet confirmed, although everyone thinks that Trazyn took him. Many also think that 'A metal giant in a scaled cloak' could also be Vulkan. Offering Creed immortality? Regardless, we shall know in the future if GW decides to bring him back for one last epic fight (probably future Siege of Terra).

[[Just as planned|Or it is Trazyn who is saving Creed to get his hands on Abaddon in the future]]. After all, he is currently playing the role of saviour, and it is stated Abaddon is the prize he wants for his collection. And he did release some of his catches to demonstrate he was [[Paranoia|just a friend willing to help]].)

==See Also==
*[[Vance Motherfucking Stubbs]] - <s>Who is tactically incompetent.</s> NONSENSE!!! There is nothing said about those one hundred [[Baneblade|Baneblades]] being lost. {{BLAM|That's heretical propaganda}}. The tanks were shipped all across the [[Imperium|Imperium's]] borders. ''(And then lost)''.
*[[Castor]] - His second cousin.
*[[Cadia]] - Where that motherfucker lives.
*[[Baneblade]] - His greatest asset
*[[Vlad von Carstein]] - His pupil in Warhammer Fantasy.
*[[Sly Marbo]] - Can "out-CREEEEEEEED!" Creed.
*[[Colour Sergeant Jarran Kell]] - His bodyguard and bro. He died on Cadia, saving Creed's life. RIP, you manly bastard.

==External Links==
*[[Abaddon at the Therapist]]
*[http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/4544432/ sup/tg/ archive of the First Coming of Creed.]
*[http://www.facebook.com/pages/Flanking-the-enemy-hidden-behind-some-moss/Ursarkar-E-Creed/167568501474?created&v=info#/pages/Flanking-the-enemy-hidden-behind-some-moss/Ursarkar-E-Creed/167568501474?ref=nf He has infiltrated Facebook ! He is also a social genius !]
And twitter! @creeeeeeeeeeeed

==Gallery==
<gallery>
Image:TacticalSexyness.jpg|The tactical sexyness of one goddamn motherfucking tactical genius.
Image:1242252059504.jpg|Creed pulling off a Yo Dawg meme.
Image:Creedrules.jpg|Creed's "Tactical Genius" special rule.
Image:CREEEED.png|AVE IMPERATOR MOTHERFUCKERS!
Image:creeeeeeeed.jpg|Abaddon getting ready for another black crusade.
Image:Tacticageniuspool.jpg|Pool is closed due to Tactical Genius.
Image:1242230736718.jpg|Cigar chomping, manly motherfucker.
Image:1242252825237.jpg|If you think this is impossible even by 40K standards then you're doing it wrong.
Image:Ursakar_Hefner.jpg|Creed, after tactical geniusing himself into position of Judge in the annual Imperial Swimsuit contest.
Image:Creeeeeeed.jpg|Some speculate a Tactical Genius placed Demolishers in the servers.
Image:Creed-loliflanku.jpg| Problem, Failbbadon?
File:Warhammer-imperial-guard.jpg| Canon CREEEED!
Image:1242225473355.jpg|If I See That Fucking Warhound One More Time...
Image:CREEEED.jpg|Even heretics resent scouting Warlords...
Image:1242253576880.jpg|...then again it's their fault for turning away from the [[Emperor|Emprah]] and all.
Image:goodnewscreed.jpg|Good news everyone... BANEBLADES!
Image:CREEEEEEEEEE.jpg|Another crusade foiled.
Image:Thrawncreed.jpg|Some speculate Admiral Thrawn may be Creed.
Image:Creed.gif|TACTICAL GENIUS
Image:1242230900950.jpg|YOU HAS NO ARMS! YOUR TACTICS ARE INVALID!
Image:CreedvTzeentch.png| Where are your Gods now, Heretic?
Image:1243030681317.jpg|Kirby may be a possible lead on who Creed really is...
Image:1243333513695.jpg|"I WAS COPULATING WITH A DAMNABLE SLAANESHI WHORE?!?!?!".
Image:Cred.jpg|CREEEEEEED
Image:Currie.jpg|The Real Creed?
Image:Creedchoke.jpg|Creed choking someone.
Image:Tacticalgenius.png|How it went down
Image:TacticalSwarmlord.png|The reason Tyranids can never take allies.
File:Hammerspace_Titan.jpg| CREEEEEEED!!!
File:And then Creed.png| THE PONIES ARE HERETICS AND SHALL NEVER RULE HERE!
</gallery>

{{IG-Characters}}
[[Category: Awesome]][[Category:Meme]][[Category:Stories]]

Drow

2018-07-19T19:14:40Z

2A01:CB15:140:9200:D562:AA2:AA58:3AA0: Undo revision 507020 by 2A02:587:3A10:BF00:2D1B:BBBB:8CD0:A372 (talk)

[[File:45308.jpg|400px|thumb|right|I think Drow is a pretty cool guy, eh evil and doesn't afraid of anything]]

'''Drow''' are black-skinned and white-haired subterranean [[elves]] who are allergic to sunlight. The strange thing is they live underground, but have black skin due to their curse by [[Corellon]] when [[Lolth]] turned them away from the other elven gods. They produce adamantine equipment (which falls apart in sunlight, yet is bad-ass underground), take slaves, are ruled by a matriarchy that likes S&M, have magic resistance and hate normal elves. In short, they'd be fucking cool, were it not for the fact that 90% of all player character Drow will be Chaotic Good and be Rebelling Against The Evils Of Their Race, thanks to the raging hard-on underages have on [[Drizzt]]. As a result, even though dark elf pr0n is 1; common, 2; totally acceptable given their interests, and 3; totally relevant when somebody asks for dark elf pictures (see 2) people still get whiny on /tg/ at anything moderately crude. Sure, we're trying to hold back the tide of cancer, but where dark elves are concerned, it's totally good.

[[Eberron]]'s Drow are somewhat different, in that they have gender equality (more or less), hang out in jungles with the Yuan-Ti, and worship Vulkoor, a dickish scorpion god who looks like a cool guy to hang out with compared to [[Lolth]]. Their mamas also actually love them rather than whip them everyday then sacrifice them later. They're still a bunch of racist dicks, though. Still, Eberron Drows are the more tolerable Drows, have a nice childhood, and at least they can be reasoned with easier. This means you can play as a Drow there without issues you'll have in any another setting.

[[Drider]]s are what happens when drow take their obsession with spiders a bit too far. The specifics vary.

==Character templates==
===AD&D and 2nd Edition===
During this era, Drow were recommended as being restricted to the role of monsters, due to their in-game lore; both [[Drizzt Do'Urden]] and [[Viconia de'Vir]] stand out as "playable" drow, with backstories to explain why they're on the surface instead of down in the Underdark. That said, The Complete Book of Elves splatbook did give rules for playable Drow and holy ''fuck'' were they powerful... IF you were playing in the Underdark.

+2 Dex, +1 Int, -1 Constitution, -2 Charisma for initial ability score modifiers, and with racial maximums of 18, 20, 17, 19, 18 and 16 for Strength, Dexterity, Constitution, Intelligence, Wisdom and Charisma respectively. They have a bunch of spell-like abilities, all usable once per day; Dancing Lights, Faerie Fire, and Darkness by default, with Levitate, Know Alignment and Detect Magic gained at level 4. Drow [[Cleric]]s get even more, in the form of Clairvoyance, Detect Lie, Suggestion and Dispel Magic. Also, they ''start'' with Magic Resistance 50% and increase it by +2% per level, to a max of 80%, and get a +2 bonus on all saves involving magic.

So, what's the drawback? Aside from the sensitivity to light (-2 penalty to Dexterity and Attack Rolls, enemies are +2 bonus to saves vs. drow spells), they also lose their powers if they spend more than two weeks outside of the Underdark, losing 10% Magic Resistance and one spell-like ability each day. If they go back to the Underdark, they get their powers back if they spend 1 day for each week they spent on the surface. Also, they get a -4 penalty to Reaction rolls against other elves, and increase their experience costs by +20%.

===3rd edition===
3E had rules in the core set for monsters as races. For Elf (Drow) the effective Character level (ECL) was 3, so a 1st level Drow elf is equivalent to a 3rd level regular elf character. The usual elf bonuses and flaws, plus: +2 Int, +2 Cha, Darkvision 120' instead of elf-normal lowlight vision, Spell resistance of 11+level, +2 to will saves for spells, can cast these spell-like abilities 1/day: dancing lights, darkness, faerie fire, weapon proficiencies are hand-crossbow rapier and shortsword instead of elf-normal, sudden bright sunlight will blind a drow for 1 round, and the drow will be dazzled until they leave the bright light. Boy drow have [[wizard]] as their favored class, girl drow have [[cleric]] (of [[Lolth]]) as favored class.

They had an article on their culture in [[Dragon Magazine]] #298 that really emphasized the darker side of drow culture. Want a sample? According to this lore, drow don't die out because, despite their tendency to murder and torture each other, they're as fertile as [[orc]]s, with females normally conceiving twins and triplets. They normally only birth a single baby, though, because the strongest usually kills and absorbs the others in the womb; these prenatal struggles actually produce orgasms more intense than anything a drow female might feel elsewhere. This sensation, ''chad-zak'', is explicitly called out as the main reason why drow women are willing to get pregnant at all, considering the selfish power-hungry bitches they generally are.

[[Eberron]] has a drow sub-race called the Umbragen, who possess strange, mystical powers connecting to the darkness. Mechanically, this is represented by replacing their spell saving throw bonus with a + 2 racial bonus to Hide & Move Silently checks, swapping their weapon proficiencies for longbow, shortbow, longsword & rapier, and making their [[Favored Class]] into [[warlock]], plus a racial-restricted set of variant abilities for [[soulknife]] and a bevy of racial feats. All of this appears in [[Dragon Magazine]] #330.

===4th edition===
The 4E Monster Manual had some explicit monsters-as-races in the back, and the Drow were one of them, although they got an identical repost in the 4e [[Forgotten Realms]] Player's Guide alongside the [[Genasi]] -- fittingly, since FR basically created the idea of Drow PCs.

For Drow, +2 Dex and +2 Cha or +2 Wis, Darkvision, +2 Intimidate, +2 Stealth, Fey Origin, Trance, and one racial encounter power (Llothtouched) that could be used as a minor action for one of two effects that last until the drow's next turn: a close-burst-1 darkness spell the drow can see through, or a faerie-fire spell that gives combat advantage against the target.

===5th edition===
Drow are '''finally''' mentioned in the Player's Handbook as an equal option for elf subtypes. The usual elf advantages, along with +1 Cha, 120' darkvision, automatic knowing some spells: the 'dancing lights' cantrip at 1st, the 'faerie fire' 1/day at 3rd level, and 'darkness' 1/day at 5th level. Automatic weapon proficiencies are hand-crossbows, rapiers and shortswords. They are also the ''only'' race to receive an explicit ''penalty'' in the core book: if the drow or the drow's target are in direct sunlight, the drow has disadvantage on attack rolls and perception rolls. Better hope you fight indoors a lot.

That said, they haven't remained the only penalized race in 5e. Both the [[duergar]] and the [[kobold]] also have the same Sunlight Sensitivity weakness, whilst kobolds and [[orc]]s are the only races in the game to have ability score penalties - something that caused an immediate outburst of [[skub]], since that mechanic had seemingly been dumped since 4th edition.

Xanathar's Guide gave them a boost with a new racial feat; Drow High Magic. Reflecting the "noble drow" spell-like abilities of AD&D, this feat grants a drow the ability to cast Detect Magic at will and both Levitate and Dispel Magic once per long rest without a spell slot.

==Pathfinder==
Pathfinder ditches the [[Lolth]] aspect and instead makes Drow aligned to assorted [[Demon Prince]]s instead. They got playable templates for the first time in their Bestiary entry, and updated versions thereof in the Advanced Races Guide. Pathfinder goes back to really, really freaking old Drow lore by stating that there's two kinds of Drow; normal Drow, and Noble Drow, who're even tougher and nastier, with a lot more magical powers. These were handled as separate races in the Bestiary, but ARG instead changed it to a Drow race with a bunch of racial feats to simulate Noble Drow abilities, which is arguably more balanced.

Fluff-wise, they're tied into the weird sf-bent of the [[Golarion]] setting, being the descendants of elves who refused to flee the planet in the face of a catastrophe, and turned to demon worship to survive. First-generation drow are actually the result of elves who've broken really bad physically and psychologically transforming into dark elves. Natural-born drow aren't actually innately evil, but their culture, which engages in the traditional practices of slavery, human sacrifice, etc., with the lovely addition of "[[Tzimisce| fleshcrafting]]," is so hideously corrupt that almost all of them end up bad anyway. They aren't matriarchal like classic drow either. Just assholes. Their [[drider]]s are... well, see that page.

===Drow===
* Ability Score Modifiers: +2 Dex, +2 Cha, -2 Con
* Size: Medium
* Speed: 30 feet
* Darkvision 120 feet
* Drow Immunities: Drow are immune to Magic Sleep Effects and get a +2 racial bonus to saves vs. Enchantments.
* Keen Senses: +2 Racial Bonus on Perception checks.
* Spell Resistance: 6 + class level
* Spell-Like Abilities: Dancing Lights, Darkness and Faerie Fire, each 1/day.
* Light Blindness: Abrupt exposure to bright light blinds a drow for 1 minute and leaves them dazzled on all subsequent rounds until they get out of the light.
* Poison Use: Drow don't risk poisoning themselves when they apply poison to weapons, etc.
* Weapon Familiarity: Free proficiency in Hand Crossbow, Rapier and Shortsword.

===Noble Drow===
* Ability Score Modifiers: +4 Dex, +2 Int, +2 Wis, +2 Cha, -2 Con
* Size: Medium
* Speed: 30 feet
* Darkvision 120 feet
* Drow Immunities: Drow are immune to Magic Sleep Effects and get a +2 racial bonus to saves vs. Enchantments.
* Keen Senses: +2 Racial Bonus on Perception checks.
* Spell Resistance: 11 + character level
* Spell-Like Abilities:
** Constant: Detect Magic
** At-Will: Dancing Lights, Deeper Darkness, Faerie Fire, Feather Fall, Levitate
** 1/Day: Divine Favor, Dispel Magic, Suggestion
* Light Blindness: Abrupt exposure to bright light blinds a drow for 1 minute and leaves them dazzled on all subsequent rounds until they get out of the light.
* Poison Use: Drow don't risk poisoning themselves when they apply poison to weapons, etc.
* Weapon Familiarity: Free proficiency in Hand Crossbow, Rapier and Shortsword.

{{D&D4e-Races}}
{{D&D5e-Races}}
{{Pathfinder-Races}}

==See also==
* [[Unified Setting/Drow]] - Arctic merchant vikings who ride giant lobsters. But still with black skin and white hair.

* [[Drizzt| Drizzt Do'Urden]] - A... [[skub|polarizing character]], but still the most famous and iconic drow hero in ''D&D''.

* [[Viconia de'Vir]] - A [[cleric]] of Shar in the ''[[Baldur's Gate]]'' games, and a good example of a "PC-friendly" drow who ''isn't'' a chaotic good Drizzt clone. Also [[Bioware]]'s first "sexy, mildly-evil-but-mostly-misunderstood lady love interest" character, setting the template for all those that followed. Had an incredibly complex, tragic and deep story in the sequel involving brotherly love and sacrifice. May have inadvertantly spawned [[Drowtales|a horribly Mary Sue webcomic funded by clinical psychopaths with too much money to spare and an axe against humanity to grind.]]

*[[Sandwich Stoutaxe]]: 1d4chan's take on the heroic Drow, she was abandoned by her family and raised by a Dwarf. So named because said dwarf found her in a basket that he thought was full of sandwichs.

* [[Drowtales]]: When an admittedly skilled bunch of [[drawfag|artists]] with the mental maturity of a blighted potato makes a webcomic series financed by sponsor avatar insertion, porn requests, and the worst, ''plot dictation'' and slather copious amounts of [[Skub]] onto it.

==Gallery==
<gallery>
File:drow_blackface.jpg|not racist; or at least not THAT kind of racist
File:Drows_in_SPEEES.jpg|in the skin darkness of the future, there is only Mary Sues. A.k.A [[Drowtales]]: How to be a mangaka-faggot with cognitive dissonance.
File:Drizzt by Todd Lockwood.jpg|did I mention the [[Drizzt|Mary Sues]] yet?
File:Yafgc drow matriarchy advantages.png|drow men have [[Rule 34|a place]] in their matriarchy
File:Drow scouts by jonhodgson.jpg|[[Meme|Welcome to the jungle]], where you can play a Drow however you want
File:Xendrik Drow.jpg|Xen'drik's drows like to tattoo themselves with scorpion venom.
</gallery>

==Monstergirls==
{{Monstergirls}}
[[Image:MGE Dark Elf.jpg|300px|thumb|right|The Dark Elf maiden is an alluring creature, if in a different way to her light-skinned cousin.]]

Given that female elves are practically canon [[monstergirls]] in [[Dungeons & Dragons]] to begin with (where do you think [[Half-Elves]] come from?), and that the drow are both female led ''and'' have a long tradition of cheesecake/pin-up tier femdom-heavy artwork for their females - there's a reason drow are often mocked on nu-/tg/ as a culture made up of cheesy BDSM pin-up art - it should be no surprise that drow feature in works of erotica just as frequently as their surface cousins. Indeed, the talk of D&D sessions everywhere must have had since the late 90's, inevitably, sexualized Drow raids owing to Greenwood's [[Magical Realm]]. Often called "Dark Elves", their skin tone ranges from the actual drow onyx/blue/purple to more dusky brown colors, which leads to the nickname "chocolate elves" being used for erotic female drow characters.

Given the heavy BDSM themes in actual drow society, it should be no surprise that drow monstergirls are usually portrayed as dominatrixes in the same way. Asian hentai artists, however, like to subvert the idea by portraying them as submissives instead of dominatrixes; chocolate elf slaves and maids are as old as [[Elf slave, wat do?]] threads. Might have something to do with dark skin being inferior in Asian cultures.

In the [[Monster Girl Encyclopedia]], the Dark Elves have willingly embraced [[succubus]]ization, unlike their Light Elf kindred. This has turned them into a perverse culture of dominatrixes, who take human men as their sexual slaves. They were some of the setting's earliest [[skub]] when it was confirmed that they actually do practice incest, with young dark elves being taught the arts of sexual dominance, bondage and sado-masochism by using their fathers as their subs - that was quickly blown out of the water by other controversial aspects of the setting, like the revelation that ''most'' monstergirl daughters will generally lose their virginities to their fathers and then decide whether they do or don't want to go and find their own boyfriend later.