2d4chan - User contributions [en]

Nate Crowley

2020-11-30T19:16:21Z

2A02:1811:5180:A200:EC3D:29FD:FA1D:618: The roman god of the dead does not love, foolish mortal!

He is not [[Steve Parker]].

Nate Crowley is one of the most recent authors for Black Library and has so far written three short stories for the 40K setting, all three of which have been rather nice reads.

The first was 'The Enemy of my Enemy' a story about Orks and Imperial Guard temporarily setting aside their differences to fight Tyranids invading a mining world they had been battling on. It also features a suprisingly realistic depiction of an Imperial Guard general so dedicated to fulfilling a legacy for himself and so delusional that he compares himself to Rogal Dorn at one point. He gets obviously betrayed at the end.

His second story is about an uneducated factory worker meeting a Space Marine and understandably having her whole world rocked.

The third and longest story he has written so far, entitled 'Severed' is a story about Vargard Obyron and his boss Nemesor Zandrekh on a tomb world where all Necrons within have had their minds erased and their bodies taken over by a massive supercomputer. It contains a scarily realistic depiction of Alzheimer's, a deepened look into the mental state of Necrons and how they feel about being reduced to unfeeling shells, and finally a large amount of gay undertones with Obyron claiming he loves his Nemesor several times. ([[skub|The reader gets to decide if the love is of the Platonic variety or not.]])

Curse of Strahd

2020-11-22T21:24:44Z

2A02:1811:5180:A200:EC3D:29FD:FA1D:618:

{{dnd-stub}}
'''Curse of Strahd''' is an adventure module for the [[Dungeons & Dragons 5th Edition|5th edition]] of [[Dungeons & Dragons]]. It is yet ''another'' reprint/rewrite of the original [[I6: Ravenloft]] adventure module, which sees your party stumbling into Barovia and trying to take down [[Strahd von Zarovich]], the Lord of Castle [[Ravenloft]].

For some reason the writers added in a ''Staff of Power'' (an item capable of doing 320 damage in a single round, which is an odd choice, as Strahd himself only has 144 hitpoints, so even if he passes his saving throw, he can still die in one shot) on page 89 that was never in any of the previous versions, but have yet to put a single toilet in any of the buildings. That's the real horror of Ravenloft: the complete and utter lack of shitters.

Also so far has the great honor to being the single adventure in D&D history to be re-released in the same edition, with the [[Skub|SUPER MAJOR CHANGES]] being getting rid of "old depictions of the Vistani that portrayed them with the same, harmful stereotypes that people use to talk about the Romani" (read: changing a few mentions of "evil Vistani" to "Vistani servants of Strahd," which ultimately makes no difference at all, and making no attempt to rewrite how they're portrayed in the module at all). Which managed to piss off pretty much everyone as they turned that into a major release while we haven't gotten tons of classical setting splatbooks (while in the meantime both [[Magic: The Gathering]] and [[Critical Role]] got theirs). And the hypocrisy of the act (considering both Wizards of the Coast and Hasbro both have a pocket-dimension worth of running lawsuits involving workplace harassment and racism) wasn't lost on [[/tg/|people]].
[[Category:Dungeons & Dragons]]
[[Category:Ravenloft]]
[[Category:Modules]]
[[Category:Roleplaying]]

Curse of Strahd

2020-11-22T21:24:31Z

2A02:1811:5180:A200:EC3D:29FD:FA1D:618:

{{dnd-stub}}
'''Curse of Strahd''' is an adventure module for the [[Dungeons & Dragons 5th Edition|5th edition]] of [[Dungeons & Dragons]]. It is yet ''another'' reprint/rewrite of the original [[I6: Ravenloft]] adventure module, which sees your party stumbling into Barovia and trying to take down [[Strahd von Zarovich]], the Lord of Castle [[Ravenloft]].

For some reason the writers added in a ''Staff of Power'' (an item capable of doing 320 damage in a single round, which is an odd choice, as Strahd himself only has 144 hitpoints, so even if he passes his saving throw, he can still die in one shot) on page 89 that was never in any of the previous versions, but have yet to put a single toilet in any of the buildings. That's the real horror of Ravenloft: the complete and utter lack of shitters.

Also so far has the great honor to being the single adventure in D&D history to be re-released in the same edition, with th[[Skub|SUPER MAJOR CHANGES]] being getting rid of "old depictions of the Vistani that portrayed them with the same, harmful stereotypes that people use to talk about the Romani" (read: changing a few mentions of "evil Vistani" to "Vistani servants of Strahd," which ultimately makes no difference at all, and making no attempt to rewrite how they're portrayed in the module at all). Which managed to piss off pretty much everyone as they turned that into a major release while we haven't gotten tons of classical setting splatbooks (while in the meantime both [[Magic: The Gathering]] and [[Critical Role]] got theirs). And the hypocrisy of the act (considering both Wizards of the Coast and Hasbro both have a pocket-dimension worth of running lawsuits involving workplace harassment and racism) wasn't lost on [[/tg/|people]].
[[Category:Dungeons & Dragons]]
[[Category:Ravenloft]]
[[Category:Modules]]
[[Category:Roleplaying]]

Flesh Eaters

2020-11-03T17:56:07Z

2A02:1811:5180:A200:EC3D:29FD:FA1D:618: /* Current Status */

{{Infobox Spess Mahreen Chapter
|Name = Flesh Eaters
|Heraldry = [[File:FleshEaterLogo.jpg|center|140px]]
|Battle Cry = Unknown
|Successors of = [[Blood Angels]]
|Founding = [[Third Founding]]
|Successor Chapters = None
|Chapter Master = Unknown
|Primarch = [[Sanguinius]]
|Homeworld = Unknown
|Specialty = [[Rip and Tear]]
|Strength = Unkown
|Allegiance = [[Imperium]]
|Colours = Dark Red
}}
{{Topquote|But if you're gonna dine with them cannibals sooner or later, darling, you're gonna get eaten . . ..|Nick Cave}}

The '''Flesh Eaters''' are a successor chapter of the [[Blood Angels]] from the Third Founding. [[Flesh Tearers|Even]] [[Blood Drinkers|when]] other successors proved to be unstable, [[High Lords of Terra|they]] decided that [[Sanguinius]]'s gene seed was good enough. As you can guess, their name stems from their consumption of flesh. This practice is attributed to a "hyper-reactive" Omophagea. Basically, since [[Space Marines]] can learn by eating things, these guys [[Tzeentch|learn a lot]]. Sadly they are still unable to learn why [[Games Workshop|GW]] keeps leaving them in the dark. Hell, they were even in [[Rogue Trader]]!

==Current Status==
They are still considered to be around. Despite what the 5th Ed BA codex says about being "Fatally undone by their gene-seed", which is code for "We don't even kn-{{BLAM|//Historitor 109.163.233.200 decommissioned by Inquisitorial decree.//}}

The previous statement still rings true as every Blood Angel Successor Chapter showed up to help [[Baal]] out before [[Roboute Guilliman|Mac-daddy Robbie G]] showed up. It can also be assumed that they got [[Primaris Marines]]. But [[Cypher|who]] really [[Matt Ward|knows]]? [[Alpha Legion|Maybe]] they ate them? We can only [[Homebrew|hope and stipulate]] like so many other forgotten successor chapters.

Their current Chief Librarian, Scaraban, is a bit of an odd duck. He has colluded with Eldar in regards to the current Tyranid situation in the galaxy. His conclusion: the Hive Mind is just an intermediate form of a developing consciousness that will acend to godhood. So that's neat.

==Daily rituals of the Flesh Eaters==
*04:00 - Reveille: The Flesh Eaters are roused from their meat hooks to start the day, it should also be noted the flesh eaters quarters are notably cold for some reason.
*04:10 - Grooming: The Flesh Eaters take the time to comb their hair and brush their teeth. Special attention is given to flossing, getting any bits of bone or meat which may be still stuck in their teeth from yesterday's combat manoeuvres.
*04:30 - Morning Meal: A light meal is prepared by the chapter serfs for the flesh eaters, this could include, sausages, pork, steak, ham, chicken, squigs, gretchins, and the chapter serfs.
*05:00 - Morning Prayer: The Flesh Eaters pray to the Emperor for enemies to eat, and for their Primarch to give them guidance. These prayers usually involve requests for dipping sauces.
*06:00 - Morning Firing Rituals: The Flesh Eaters prepare their next set of meals.
*06:30 - Battle Practice: The Flesh Eaters practice with their ritual weapons against captured heretics, orks, aeldari and tyranids. The ritual weapons bear a suspicious resemblance to meat cleaves, knifes, forks, and lobster crackers.
*08:00 - Meal Break: The Chapter serfs prepare a delicious meal from whatever the Flesh Eaters have killed this morning.
*10:00 - Tactical Indoctrination: The Flesh Eaters prepare their skills in locating the prime rib, sirloin, and tenderloin of whatever they happen to be killing this week.
*12:00 - Midday meal: The Flesh Eaters enjoy a delicious midday meal.
*13:00 - Grocery Run: The Flesh Eaters dip out for snacks.
*14:00 - Ritual Communion: The Chapter convenes in the reclusiarum to ritually "commune" with their primarch. This practice usually involves eating Ork parts, and attempting to not trip balls in the process.
*15:00 - Deep Strike Training - The Flesh Eaters will practice their maneovers using jump packs and close combat.
*16:00 - Evening Firing Rituals. the Flesh Eaters will gather to practice their night firing manoeuvres.
*17:20 - Meat Break: The Flesh Eaters enjoy a light snack of roughly half a cow.
*18:00 - Evening Meal: A Feast is prepared from whatever remains of their earlier firing rituals.
*19:30 - Evening prayer: The Chapter gives thanks to the Emperor for their bountiful meals and the abundance of dipping sauce recieved today
*21:30 - Free Time: The Flesh Eaters attempt to think of new jokes about eating meat or cannibalism, before deciding to watch reruns of the ancient Terran cooking show, "Kitchen Nightmares".
*23:00 - The Flesh Eaters impale themselves on their meat hooks for a good night's sleep.

==Campaigns==
*'''The Pentarchy of Blood''' (War of the False Primarch) - The [[Flesh Eaters]], [[Space Sharks]], [[Death Eagles]], [[Red Talons]], & the [[Charnel Guard]] destroyed eleven other Space Marine chapters deemed heretics.
*'''Golance War''' - The Flesh Eaters get duped by [[Eldar]] and have to be bailed out by the [[Mentor Legion|Mentors]].
*'''Alvatine Suppression''' - The Flesh Eaters did ''something'' or were involved with whatever it was. Too bad this event is [[FAIL|not referenced anywhere else]].
*'''[[Devastation of Baal]]''' - The Flesh Eaters got almost destroyed.

==Quotes==
{{Topquote|They vilify us for our methods, yet nobody questions the results. We are the chosen Scions of Sanguinius, tempered weapon of the Emperor Himself. Our enemies quake with fear even before we strike first blood. They will soon know it is a fear well founded! Let them fear the Angels of Death, let them fear what is left of their short future; let them pray for death. Brothers, we will answer those prayers|Force Commander Isiah of the Flesh Eaters during the Golance War, 987.M41}}

{{Topquote|This symbol I wear upon my shoulder and I bear upon my banner. He who defiles it defiles me, and shall be damned for all eternity.|Brother Ukadi, Adeptus Astartes Flesh Eaters, prior to the conclusion of the Alvatine Suppression}}

{{Topquote|Yes! Our true purpose is clear! Eat! Eat!! '''B U R G E R !!!'''|Captain Creepio, the first Flesh Eater.}}

==Gallery==
<gallery>
File:FleshEaterRT.jpg|"Pray For Death" You'll get eaten [[Rape|anyways]].
File:JawsOfDoom.jpg|Charging an [[Ork]] compound with an Auto-pistol. No wonder he's pissed.
</gallery>
{{Template:Marines-Official}}
[[Category:Warhammer 40,000]][[Category:Imperial]][[Category:Space Marines]][[Category:Blood Angels]]

Explorator Fleet

2020-11-03T13:32:10Z

2A02:1811:5180:A200:EC3D:29FD:FA1D:618:

[[File:Warhammer40k EternalPraetorian by TheFirstAngel.jpg|350px|right|]]
The '''Explorator Fleets''' are fleets sent by the [[Adeptus Mechanicus]] to explore less-known parts of the galaxy. Think of them as [[Rogue Trader]]s, add in ship loads of tech priests, ancient space-faring technologies ([[Grimdark|which the priests keep to themselves]], the selfish little...) and a big old focus on finding hidden technological secrets rather than [[Eldar|booty and spoils]] and you have yourselves an Explorator fleet.

Their primary mission is to find lost technology, especially a working [[STC]] system (though printouts are also welcome). Often, they find other things, like new worlds and civilizations, or worlds with which contact had been lost centuries before, or [[Forge World]]s founded by a previous expedition. Often they find danger, which is why they bring along a detachment of [[Skitarii]], just in case. The drive to find working STCs fill the tech-priests with the sort of (balls-to-the-walls, batshit fucking insane) fervor that makes them risk huge fleets and massive resources in order to even get a whiff of them.

Explorator Fleets tend to be crewed by the most curious of [[tech-priests]], which means that when they find ancient tombs filled with impossibly advanced technology, they generally poke around a little too hard and a little too deep (ancient tombs being a colloquial slang for the orifices of your mother), which wakes up the inhabitants. With said inhabitants being [[Necrons|cantankerous old robots with no time for kids ruining their lawn]], this often lead to lots of deaths (this happens in at least two of the [[Ciaphas Cain]] stories). It's a seriously endemic problem, probably compounded by the fact that some tech-priests worship the Necrons as angels of the [[Omnissiah]].

The reason why the Adeptus Mechanicus isn't too keen on sending out Explorator Fleets is because they are worried about all of those nasty corrupting influences out there in space, ya know. The lure of forbidden technology, the sight of tech heresies, xenos technology....it can all turn a tech-priest on their little metal head, and at times not in the way the higher ups would like. Their reverence for technology means anything unusual (even a long lost type of electric toaster) can make them giddy and excited and since they are far away from the steadying hands of the senior Techpriests Magos of the forge worlds (where they can monitor them "Big Brother" style) the chances of heresy are pretty darn high. Add the fact that exploratory fleets usually include the most open minded of tech-priests and well....such things are self evident. This does mean that some of the best [[Heresy|useful and inventive work]] is done by Explorator Fleets (although the [[Rogue Trader (RPG)|Rogue Trader books]] do insist that some tech-heresies like accepting Xenos tech or widespread genetic manipulation are banned and must be kept secret - [[Derp|although they tend to happen anyway]]).

So why allow such high risks? Why not allow the Rogue Traders or Imperial exploration fleets to bring back technologies, letting them do the hard work? The answer is greed (and also Grimdark or whatever). The Adeptus Mechanicus are the biggest hoarders in the universe and are worse magpies than the [[Blood Ravens]]. They keep all the best technology for themselves and only really share the mass produced stuff (and only because of their ancient agreements or because almost everything the Imperium gets from the AdMech it is also building without the AdMech and so the Mechanicus pretends to “share” what the Imperium already has)). While the imperial navy has to manually load torpedoes by hand with hundreds of workers, the Mechanicus have auto-loaders on their ships. While the Imperial Guard are armed with flashlights and carboard vests, their Skitarii counterparts are pimped to the fucking gills with the best equipment. This is made worse by each Forge World being technically their own domain and often keeping secrets from their fellows simply because they can and they tend to not be near each other, making direct contact difficult if not impossible (it also sucks to spend twenty years trying to get to another, far-off Forge World to find it [[Steel Confessors|Nommed or blown up]]).

The worst thing is that the tech-priests don't actually know how the tech works; on the (rare) occasion when they do manage to get their greasy mechadendrites on it (relying, as they do, on instruction manuals even less technically detailed than the 'Dummy's Guide to...." series). So if an Explorator Fleet did find some unusual tech the Imperium at large would probably not know about it for a thousand years because between drawn out religious ceremonies, their desire to keep secrets <s> (cause fuck the Emprah and all his sheep, the Omnissiah is where it's at),</s> {{BLAM|HERESY!}}{{BLAM}} and just having no idea what button to press, it would take that long for the tech-priests to make any damn good on it. Admittedly, this is better than them pushing the wrong button and opening a new Eye of Terror. Its not like rushing out technology has ever [[Maerorus|gone horribly]] for all those involved. In a way this goes back to why the Mechanicus has Explorators: the Imperium is not afraid to experiment and use the scientific method. These things are heresy to the Mechanicus even though it usually works.

On the plus side Explorator Fleets offer good settings for Warhammer 40k role-playing games. Want to be a tech-priest and his retinue of slightly colourful nutters exploring a new corner of the dark universe? Well now you can! It's only a matter of time though before one of them stumbles on a dimensional rift and find a borg cube or something.....("All hail our brothers in bionics! Wait, you want to do what? Well I can't join your collective I am already part of a priesthood....wait, wait what noooooooooooooooo. Oh you are injecting more machines into me? All hail our brothers in bionics....").

===Known Ship Hulls===
*'''Lathe-class Monitor-Cruiser;''' An Adeptus Mechanicus Light Cruiser designed around deep space exploration and extreme self-reliance. These ships, when properly outfitted, can operate for decades without returning to imperial space for resupply. These would make up the bulk of Explorator fleets.
*'''Secutor-class Monitor-Cruiser;''' An Adeptus Mechanicus Light Cruiser designed to excel at the art of war. Tougher than all of the other Light Cruisers and yet still more mobile than true Cruisers. Due to being designed from the ground up to be a Warship, this Light Cruiser is fitted with Cruiser sized Void Shield Generators.

{{Imperium}}
[[Category:Adeptus Mechanicus]]

Lugft Huron

2020-11-03T12:56:39Z

2A02:1811:5180:A200:EC3D:29FD:FA1D:618: /* Chaos Lord */

{{heresy}}

{{Topquote|Gentlemen we can rebuild him, we have the technology!|the bionic man, also chief apothocary and forgemaster of the astral claws, probobly}}

[[File:TyrantofBadab.jpg|250px|thumb|left|Lugft Huron as the Chapter Master of the Astral Claws. Note that even his claw has a claw. This is before he got his [[heresy]] on...]]

[[File:Huron_Blackheart.jpg|250px|thumb|right|...And here in full [[heresy]]]]

'''Lugft/Lufgt Huron''' <s>(pronounce Lüg-ft Hú-ron)</s> (a name which remains [[Cthulhu|unpronounceable]] and inconsistently spelled to this day), also known as "Captain Jack Sparrow", "Blackbeard", and other pirate-related names, was the Chapter Master of the [[Astral Claws]] [[Space Marine]] Chapter, and later the Pirate Lord of the [[Red Corsairs]]. He is also known as the "'''Blood Reaver'''" and by his more recent name: "'''Huron Blackheart'''".

If it's any consolation, the vidya gaem: Battlefleet Gothic: Armada 2 pronounces his original first name as "Luh-ft", so we can assume that the g is silent. Though that game also pronounces [[Horus|Lupercal]] as loo-PURR-cull, so take its pronunciations with a teaspoon of salt.

== History ==
=== Chapter Master ===
Lugft Huron is the textbook example of what happens when you let [[High Lords of Terra|damned bureaucrats]] [[derp|run things into the ground]]. When he became Chapter Master of the Astral Claws, he was an arrogant douchebag that had one job: defend the perimeter of the [[Maelstrom]] Warp storm and make sure nothing comes out of it to rape the shit out of the Imperium. But boy, did he ever do his job and did he do it well. After his predecessor got killed by an [[Ork]] [[Warboss]], he led his whole Chapter on a merry dance of purging worlds close to the Maëlstrom and generally stabilizing both the region and the situation. Everyone in the general vicinity lauded him as a man of daring action and there was much rejoicing.

Then civilian unrest broke out on his Chapter's homeworld for the umpteenth time. Huron was really tired of that shit, so he decided to take control and put his Marines in charge of things. Thus, the Astral Claws became the ''de jure'' rulers of the [[Badab]] Sector, with Huron himself as the Tyrant of Badab. This worked out decently well, and [[grimdark|while not always fair and just]] his methods made the Badab sector prosper under his rule. Spurred on by his success, he sent [[High Lords of Terra|aforementioned fuck-ups]] a nice petition requesting more troops to decisively take care of the Maelstrom and getting rid of that thorn in the side of the Imperium for good... [[Fail|It was dismissed without even being read!]]

And that's where everything went wrong forever. When his requests to the [[High Lords of Terra]] for increased resources to consolidate his gains were denied, he [[butthurt|decided]] that in the absence of help from the [[Imperium]] he would run things his own way. He refused to hand his [[gene-seed]] tithes to the [[Adeptus Mechanicus]], and when the Imperium came calling he blocked trade to and from his Sector in order to keep the gathered resources for his military. Eventually, he attracted the attention of the [[Inquisition]] and when Huron blew them off, they decided that they needed to remind him who answered to whom [[Exterminatus|in the subtlest, softest way possible]]. Thus, the [[Badab War]] was launched.

In the end, Huron's rebellion was crushed by the forces of the [[Imperium]], as something like a dozen [[Space Marine]] Chapters responded. Of course, Huron wasn't just a rebel, he turned out to be a [[heretic]] too (although when exactly he turned to Chaos isn't entirely clear). In the final battle on Badab Primaris, Huron was horribly injured by a melta-blast from a dying Zhrukal Androcles while trying to escape his palace. Losing heart, the Astral Claws fled with their fallen Chapter Master. Lord Apothecary Garreon, Apothecary Secundus Variel, and Master of the Forge Armanneus Valthex (guys who had earned the charming nicknames of "the Corpse Master", "the Flayer", and "the Alchemancer", respectively) set to work trying to save the life of Huron and succeeded, after making him, functionally, Chaos' answer to [[Colonel "Iron Hand" Straken|this motherfucker]]. However, they had a little help. While comatose, Huron was visited by the [[Chaos Gods]], who offered him the power he craved and vengeance against the Imperium which rejected him. Huron agreed, and with his remaining forces fled to the [[Maelstrom]].

=== Chaos Lord ===
He is now known as '''Huron Blackheart''', and those forces remaining under his command are called the [[Red Corsairs]]. After several years as a powerful space pirate, Huron would go on to gain control of a significant portion of the [[Maelstrom]] (the little brother of the [[Eye of Terror]]) with his vast pirate fleet, made up of space marines who turned traitor, many other human reavers and some Xenos mercenaries.

One of his greatest achievements as a pirate lord was the capture of the ''Wolf of Fenris''; a Strike Cruiser, where according [[RAGE|to some sources]] ''(the [[Gav Thorpe|very skubtastic]] 4th edition Chaos Codex)'', some of the defenders turned on their brethren and surrendered to the Red Corsairs.

By the end of M41, Huron is the second most powerful [[Chaos Lord]] in the galaxy after [[Abaddon]] himself; a fact that annoys Abby to no end, not least because Huron has not been subtle in hiding his ambition to take Abaddon's place as Warmaster. Not only this but Huron did it FAST, as in, in the space of several decades, since the Badab War only ended in 912.M41 so he's a relative newcomer in the grand scheme of things, but he's accumulated more power faster than many more well established warlords.

He's also powerful enough that he can just give away warriors as well by hosting the '''Skull Harvest''' in the Maelstrom, he awarded over 17,000 warriors to [[Honsou|a sick fuck]].

One thing fans tend to miss, while those that are new to the setting get right away is that Huron, being ''space pirate captain'' has cybernetics equivalents of a peg leg, hook, eye patch and even captain's parrot in a form of his daemon familiar.

Huron once lost to Typhus, who allowed him to live. In-universe, Typhus reasoned that the humiliation and resentment from such humbling might just open Huron's soul to [[Nurgle|Grandaddy]]'s influence more. (And out-of-universe, it's evidently because named characters can't permakill one another, except rare circumstances.)

The Red Corsairs possess the second last remaining Blackstone Fortress given to them by Abaddon (why? He's openly planning to replace the guy, that doesn't exactly scream 'give me superweapons'). The other one was discovered in M42 and was not in any records until then.

Supposedly he now has the power to be at two places at once.

== Tabletop ==
There are two versions of Huron; ''before'' and ''after''. One of which represents him as Chapter Master of the Astral Claws whilst the other is the Chaos Lord form.

Bizarrely, the two versions share virtually nothing in common.
As Chapter Master; he has an extra wound & attack and terminator armour with a heavy flamer equipped. He also has the ability to get back up once per game if defeated, lets the entire army use his Leadership 10 and the normal Chapter Master bombardment ability becomes Ordnance 2, because it was Huron himself who said [[Awesome|"Big Guns Never Tire"]]. His relic is a pretty amazing AP2 lightning claw that forces re-rolls on invulnerable saves. So non-Chaos Huron is a bit of a monster and with an ''"as much as a Land Raider"'' price tag to go with it, not quite as good as some of the [[Marneus Calgar|other]] [[Darnath Lysander|big]] [[Asterion Moloc|heavy]] [[Logan Grimnar|characters]], but by no means useless.

After he got hit by [[Star Phantoms|Androcles]] melta-blast and rebuilt he took a bit of a dive in power, losing that wound and attack, as well as his Terminator Armour. His claw got replaced with an S+2, AP3, Armourbane one, but the Heavy Flamer ended up getting built into it. He takes an Axe for his AP2 needs, but unfortunately he's nowhere near as good in melee as before. All of his army-buff and "living legend" abilities also got lost so he doesn't add as much to his army ''(but then again, few Chaos special characters do these days)'', but he gets the '''Hamadrya''' which grants him a random psychic power every turn. (Bit of Trivia -Hamadryas is a genus of several butterflies and babboons. The name Hanadrya comes from Greek [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hamadryad | Hamadryad] -a kind of wood nymph. It literally means "Together Tree". If the tree died, it would die. This is probably a reference to the fact that the Hamadryas familiar was spawned from the Maelstrom and Lugft couldn't venture far from the area without the creature weakening. Later he trapped the soul of a powerful sorcerer in a vessel to nourish the Hamadrya)

For all of the nerfs, his price tag was also reduced considerably, so he makes for a pretty decent, cost effective, unmarked Chaos Lord who can pull a few tricks out of the bag.

There is an argument that the later chaos version really should have been better, especially since [[Ortan Cassius|other characters]] [[Colonel "Iron Hand" Straken|who have received]] a cybernetic rebuild ended up with improved stat-lines, so why didn't Huron?
One could wonder why his rules don't really transition from one to the other with similar expectations; ''(Other than the fact that the Chaos version came first)'' Probably due to the internal balance of the codex... and increase in stats could end up too much like [[Typhus]] who is meant to be the resilient one with psychic powers. Or if they just took the Chapter Master version and "added Chaos" he could end up too similar to [[Abaddon]] who is meant to be the top-dog. So essentially the rules differences allowed Huron to be played distinctly from the other character options available.

{{Template:Chaos-Marines}}
[[Category:Warhammer 40,000]][[Category:Chaos]][[Category:Space Marines]]

Lotara Sarrin

2020-11-03T11:04:41Z

2A02:1811:5180:A200:EC3D:29FD:FA1D:618: /* History */

{{Heresy}}
[[File:Preheresy-world-eaters.jpg|thumb|Don't let her gender or size fool you: Lotara Sarrin was badass enough to earn the respect of [[Angron|these two]] [[Khârn|swell guys]]!]]
{{Topquote|Fire the Ursus Claw!|Lotara Sarrin, at any chance she gets in a void battle.}}
{{Topquote|No one runs from the Conqueror!|Lotara Sarrin, before shooting down a ship full of defecting World Eaters and crew.}}

So what happens if you give a thirty-something woman - surrounded by [[World Eaters|psychotic murderers]] - full authority of a [[Gloriana-class Battleship|fuck-off huge starship]] during one of the biggest [[Horus Heresy|cluster fucks]] known to human kind? She commits murder - but not just any murder, ''oh [[Khorne]] no.'' The woman we speak of is none other than '''Lotara Sarrin''', who would go on to [[RIP AND TEAR|commit such an absurd amount of Warp-murder]] that she receives a mark of honour from [[Kharn|that swell guy]] and earns some level of respect from [[Angron|that other guy]].

Naturally, her status as a [[Mary Sue|bad-ass]] easily makes her good [[waifu]] material - that is if you like your 'waifus' [[Sisters of Battle|cold, aggressive and dominant]].

== History ==
The commanding officer of the World Eaters flagship Conqueror since she was 30, Lotara was one of the youngest ship officers in the Imperium. Despite her regular human status Lotara had a degree of respect within the World Eaters, wearing their bloody hand honor emblem and being on somewhat amicable terms with Angron himself. After Lotara complained about Remembrancers aboard her ship, [[Mod|Angron immediately had them expelled]]. During the Horus Heresy, Lotara stayed committed to Angron and commanded the Conqueror during the Shadow Crusade.

During said Shadow Crusade, Lotara balanced her own lust for void-murder and giving Angron lip for wanting to fight [[Lorgar|his whiny brother]]. During the battle of Armatura, with the safety of distance between herself and the murder machine, she gave him the verbal sneer of the millennium:

:'''Angron:''' ''"How's my ship doing?"''
:'''Lotara:''' ''"You mean'' my ''ship. And we're doing just fine."''

During the same battle, the [[Ultramarines|Smurfs]] made a boarding attempt on the ''Conqueror'' and that's when Lotara realized the World Eaters supposed to deal with them had gone to join the fun on the planet below. Her reaction?
:Step 1: wake up all remaining Dreadnoughts on board, then join them in going to town on blue power-armored ass with her naval armsmen.
:Step 2: Shoot the captain of the defenders when he came back smack between his helmet's eyeplates with her laspistol. Then chew him out twice as hard because not only did he dare desert his post, on top of that he dared return fire at a superior officer reprimanding him.
It is rather telling said Astartes captain agreed to be confined to his quarters for a while rather than keep up being on the receiving end of the temper of this mere mortal woman.

Around this time, Lotara also noticed Angron was deteriorating. After some investigation and pointed questions with the local [[Adeptus Mechanicus|cog boys]] on her ship, she learned the Nails were killing Angron. How she remained calm and didn't shoot them in the face like she did to the captain of the boarding specialist Astartes squads, is still unknown. Then again, she did force the AdMech to focus on repairing the [[Titan (Warhammer 40,000)|Ember Wolves Titan Legion]] division.

After Nuceria, the subsequent loss of her card playing companion [[Dreadnought#Contemptor Pattern|Lhorke]] and Angron's ascension into [[Daemon Prince|daemonhood]], [[Not As Planned|shit began to go fuckways]] because [[Chaos]]. Dropping out of the [[Warp]] due to human error left the Conqueror mostly isolated. The [[Word Bearers]] either did not notice or simply did not care about the World Eaters' flagship dropping out of transit, and even some World Eater vessels did not drop from transit with them. From this point on, Lotara steered the World Eaters fleet (or what remained of it) from planet to planet to satiate [[RIP AND TEAR|the need for murder]] and replenish supplies.

On their way to the [[Siege of Terra|party of the century]], Lotara began to feel like the [[Machine Spirit|ship was trying to kill them]]. The usual [[Khorne]] fuckery ensued: Blood from the showers and taps, lice leeching blood from the people's scalps, constant infighting, murderous rampaging World Eaters, and of course the thing Angron had become turning half the ship into a [[RIP AND TEAR|fleshy, bloody mess]]. Captain Sarrin did the unthinkable and plotted a mutiny/abandonment-of-ship with a few sane World Eaters. But at the very last moment, when the insubordinate crew fled and that swell guy Kharn confronted one of his own, it was revealed that Lotara wasn't going anywhere and she proceeded to gun down the fleeing vessels while speaking one line: [[Awesome|''"No one runs from the Conqueror."'']]

That said, Lotara's loyalty could only be pushed that far: when Angron finally went completely batshit insane after being refused the honour of leading the attack on Terra by [[Horus]] and started rampaging through the ship, she pretty much conned Khârn into making a deal with [[Night Lords|Gendor Skraivok]] to have Angron locked up in the maze [[Perturabo|Perty]] built to contain [[Vulkan]] until it was go time.

It is still unknown what Lotara's fate is, but it is common fanon that she is part of the Conqueror like some Titan pilots fuse with their God-Machines, or perhaps if she herself has ascended to daemonhood and effectively became the ship's new machine spirit.

== In Novels ==
Notable novel appearances go here.
Betrayer, her first apperance.
Lost and the Damned. She and Kharn work together with the Night Lords to lock Angron up in Curze's Vulkan maze.

== On The Tabletop ==
She doesn't have any official rules, but this category being here means someone is cooking up some homebrew.

== In Video Games ==
Lotara is represented in the Horus Heresy Legions mobile TCG. Disappointingly enough, she doesn't belong to the World Eaters legion and comes as a Neutral warlord as Imperial Army, thus barring her from access to legion cards, but in hindsight putting her in with the World Eaters legion might make them stupidly OP due to her ability. Her ability places a 2/3 Front Line with Flank in play for a mere 2 energy, so you can always cover what you're about to put on the field and throw them at what your opponent plays on their turn. Lotara decks are somewhat decent in the 1000 - 1500 rating bracket once you have access to cards such as Mount Pharos to generate some Astartes cards. What is unique however is that Lotara starts with a special card like the Primarchs and Valdor do, this one-off card stuns all enemies for free, perfect to shut down your opponent and protect an important card.

== Gallery ==
Waifu imagery goes here. It is interesting to note that while in the books she is blonde, almost all the fanart of her presents her as a brunette.

<center>
<gallery>
Lotara1.jpg
Lotara2.jpg
Lotara3.jpg
Ursusclaw.jpg
Lotaranews.png
Lotara4.jpg
LotaraCard.png| Lotara's card in the Horus Heresy Legions TCG
File:Lotara Sarrin Anime Style.jpg
</gallery>
</center>

== See Also ==

* [[World Eaters]]

* [[Gloriana-class Battleship]]

* [[Horus Heresy]]

[[Category: Warhammer 40,000]]

[[Category: Chaos]]

Lorgar

2020-11-02T13:18:47Z

2A02:1811:5180:A200:EC3D:29FD:FA1D:618: /* Pre-Heresy */

{{heresy}}
[[Image:Lorgar Handsome.jpg|400px|thumb|right|Bet you didn't know Mr. Clean was a primarch. An Evil Primarch.]]

{{Topquote|From fanaticism to barbarism is only one step.|Denis Diderot}}

{{Topquote|For years I have despised Lorgar... look at [[Roboute Guilliman|your primarch]], Honorius. So singular in aspect. So noble. I have envied you, envied the [[Rogal Dorn|Imperial Fists]], the [[Horus|Luna Wolves]], the [[Ferrus Manus|Iron Hands]]. And I am not alone. We struggle with a mercurial mind, Honorius. We labour under the burden of a brilliant but fallible commander. We no longer bear the word, my friend. We bear '''''Lorgar'''''.|Sorot Tchure, a Captain of the Word Bearers, to Captain Honorius Luciel of the [[Ultramarines]] (shortly before Tchure betrayed him at Calth)}}

{{Topquote|The difference between gods and daemons largely depends upon where one is standing at the time.|<s>The dude himself.</s> [[Argel Tal]], when speaking about how it feels like to be [[Possessed]]. Lorgar liked the sentence and jotted it down, [[Blood Ravens|hence it's erroneously attributed to him]].}}

{{topquote|All I ever wanted was the truth...|First line of the Book Of Lorgar}}

{{Topquote|THAT WAS LORGAR!|[[Magnus the Red]], [[If the Emperor had a Text-to-Speech Device|on fucking everything in the Imperium up.]]}}

The human incarnation of 'Did Nothing Wrong'.

'''Lorgar''', also known as '''Lorgar Aurelian''', '''Bearer of the Word''', '''The Urizen''' (cf. William Blake), '''The Golden One''', '''[[TTS|The Goddamned Choir Boy]]''', and (if you're [[Konrad Curze]]) '''[[Awesome|Pathetic]]''', is the [[Primarch]] of the [[Word Bearers]] legion, the extra religious legion of [[Chaos Space Marines|Kheyos Sphess Mahreens]]. He is credited within [[40k]] [[fluff]] for being ''the'' first Primarch to fall to the [[Chaos Gods|Ruinous Powers]]. Yes, we know what you're thinking and no, [[Horus]] was just the most powerful Primarch to lead the actual Rebellion and the first to be public about it. Lorgar was the first to be corrupted, though this wasn't noticed as he was very secretive about it. Also, looks just like Patrick Stewart, and Handsome Squidward.

Tl;dr: [[Horus Heresy|EVERYTHING]] is this guy's fault. Seriously, [[Archaon]] has nothing on this guy...#BlameLorgar

==Pre-Heresy==
[[File:Past-Lorgar-Primarchs-.jpeg|300px|right|thumb|Young Lorgar writing his first <s>Chaos</s> religious fan-fic.]]
Like the rest of the Primarchs, Lorgar was scattered through the Warp by the [[Chaos Gods]]. The infant landed on Colchis, a world of excellence, beauty and most of all, faith. Lorgar was taken in by [[Kor Phaeron]], a former priest of the Covenant (Colchis' chief religious order) and a Chaos worshipper. As he grew, he was educated in philosophy and rhetoric and he was gifted with a charisma that greatly aided his role as a preacher, making him immensely popular with the Colchisian faithful. At first, he remained a staunch defender of the Faith, but his life changed due to his frequent visions of a new [[God-Emperor of Mankind|Messiah]] arriving into Colchis, clad in [[Pauldrons|gleaming armour]], who rode on [[Imperial Navy|clouds of iron]] as he led his [[Space Marines|army of angels]] across the stars. Though Kor Phaeron had little patience for what he considered [[Heresy]], his own grudges with the Covenent meant that when they declared war on Lorgar and all his followers Kor Phaeron would aid his "son" (and continue to give lip service to the Emperor until the time was right). Six long years engulfed Colchis into Civil War, yet, due to his insane charisma convincing thousands upon thousands of faithful to worship the new Messiah, Lorgar won through [[Imperial Guard|sheer numbers]]. By the time they were done, the [[God-Emperor of Mankind|Emperor of Mankind]] and [[Magnus the Red]] arrived on Colchis and everybody was absolutely ''ecstatic.'' Almost overnight Colchis became an extravagant world all in devotion to the Emperor. After about a month of celebrations, the now slightly annoyed Emperor appointed Lorgar head of the Imperial Heralds, which Lorgar renamed the Word Bearers.

During the [[Great Crusade]], Lorgar loved the Emperor. Like ''really'' loved him; in fact, he was the only Primarch to both consider him a god and actively spread said belief wherever he went. He loved the Emprah so much that he wrote the Lectitio Divinitatus which was all about the divinity of the Emperor, and built huge Gothic cathedrals on every single world the Word Bearers conquered. And, ironically enough for a being genetically engineered to be a super-soldier and general, he disliked war. To say his generally preachy attitude didn't endear him to his brothers is an understatement. Except for Horus, Leman Russ and Magnus; Lorgar had little friends or support amongst his brothers. (Guilliman respected the fact he rebuilt planets after conquering them but they were never really close and he would become something of a pal with Angron during the Heresy, as much as can be said that Angron could be.) This is best demonstrated by the following example: at one point the Word Bearers had come to the help of the Iron Hands, so Ferrus Manus decided to craft a nice weapon for Lorgar as a thank-you gift. Lorgar was actually happy but as he watched Manus busy at his forge, he couldn't help to wonder ([[Fail|aloud]]) whether his brother would be able to craft anything beside tools for war with his metal hands. Manus didn't really appreciate the comment and wondered back if Lorgar would able to craft anything at all! Ferrus still gave him ''Illuminarum'' and Lorgar would wield the huge Crozius Arcanum from then on, but the incident only broadened the wedge between them.

Unbeknownst to Lorgar, [[The Last Church|the Emperor was a NAYtheist]], and was ''really'' disappointed towards his son but waited 100 years before telling by having the [[Ultramarines|Smurfs]] destroy Lorgar's greatest masterpiece city, Monarchia, like any good bad daddy would have done it. It's like he was begging Lorgar to fall to Chaos. Lorgar's religiosity threatened to undermine his top-secret project to starve Chaos of any kind of worship. He made Lorgar stop his god worship in a very good-daddy kind of way: He then used his [[Psyker]] powers to [[Troll|force Lorgar and 100 thousand of his legion to kneel]] before [[That guy|the Emperor]], [[Roboute Guilliman]], and [[Malcador|Malcador the Sigilite]]. Destroying an entire city is one thing, but being forced to kneel down before Great Grandpa Smurf was of such humiliation that it would inflict clinically incurable depression into anyone... Which is totally understandable as the Emprah had waited a whole century to tell that he was not at all into this being worshipped as a god thing Lorgar kept preaching about all the time, only to have the Ultramarines destroy the city Lorgar considered one of his greatest achievements to make his point - again - this was 100 years after Lorgar's discovery by big E, and Lorgar rightfully pointed out to Magnus that the Emprah had spent weeks on Colchis following his arrival and had witnessed that people were clearly worshipping him as a God, yet had said nothing then, only to tell Lorgar a century later that he was a failure and should shape up (see "The First Heretic").

What is even more mind boggling is that - despite this fact - it neither occurred to the Emprah nor Magnus, who are both supposed to be hyper geniuses, that it probably would have been the sensible thing to tell Lorgar right then and there that religion was not really the Emprah's thing... instead of waiting a whole century before letting Lorgar know that he had messed up. The Emprah even went so far as to tell Lorgar that "out of all of his sons" Lorgar, and Lorgar alone, had failed him. Again, after 100 years, making his bitterness and eventual fall of Chaos much more understandable. Considering such, the Emprah could not have reacted worse; severe enough to embitter Lorgar but without any attempt to rehabilitate the inevitable festering wound. A fact that apparently Malcador eventually realized at some point as in the audio drama he says "if there is one Primarch I wish we could have saved, I would have hoped it to be Lorgar" (not exact quote, but close). Guilliman had similar reservations. He never acted on them until too [[Battle of Calth|late]], probably because Lorgar had not even been super excited about what he saw in the Warp and called it "horror". But under the gentle guidance of Kor Phaeron and (fuck) Erebus; the two eventually managed to corrupt him.

Severely humiliated and wracked with self-doubt, Lorgar secluded himself in Emo sulking, and began listening to Kor Phaeron (now First Captain of the Word Bearers) and First [[Chaplain]] [[Erebus]] about the facts of the Old Faith of Colchis: many other worlds shared similar concepts of such gods. Having unrelated worlds share a single common faith, is this evidence that [[Chaos|such Gods beyond the realm of material existence]] truly existed and were worthy of worship? This in turn led to Lorgar, willing to expand his enlightenment and guided by the sorcerer Ingethel the Ascended of the planet [[Cadia]], plunging headfirst into the [[Eye of Terror]]. The rest is <s>history</s> heresy.

Before the heresy Lorgar was widely considered the weakest Primarch as both a fighter and warlord, preferring to act more as a [[Reasonable Marines|diplomat]] and [[Ecclesiarchy|preacher]]. His actions during the Heresy proved everyone wrong (or maybe his power grew massively once he tapped into his psychic powers- he nearly got shredded by Corvus during the Drop Site Massacre). When Lorgar first toured the Eye of Terror, he was forced to fight An'ggrath the Unbound (who is to [[Bloodthirster]]s what Bloodthirsters are to Gretchin) in order to prove himself worthy of becoming the champion of Chaos Undivided, and [[What|won]]. He also got a visit from Kairos Fateweaver, informing him of his possible futures in a one-time deal where that [[Lord of Change]] would only speak the truth, primarily involving his future campaign on Calth, and a very important choice to make.

His<s> plan of attack</s> shooting of his allies in the back on Calth resulted in beating the shit out of Ultramarine forces two times his army's size, proving Lorgar was also a damn good warlord. Even the fact that his Calth attack force was finally screwed over was part of his plan: the entire point of the Calth war was to purge the Legion of ignorant hotheads who put revenge and hatred over Chaos worshiping, in addition, Fateweaver explicitly told him that [[Roboute Guilliman]] had to survive the campaign on Calth, which would cause him to become paranoid & doubtful and therefore start summoning his forces to [[Macragge]] to create '''[[Imperium Secundus]]''' which would starve [[Terra]] of resources and possibly swing the war in the direction of Horus. Killing Guilliman would mean that the separatists would never get that chance, so Lorgar had to make a choice between slaying his most hated brother, or sparing him for a shot at something greater.

By the way, in the Horus Heresy novels it's seen he actually cared a lot for all of his brothers and tried to befriend them. Closest to him among his brothers was perhaps Magnus, which is more than you can say about some loyalist primarchs. Though with different approaches, they were both more scholars than warriors, with lifelong pursuit of knowledge and enlightenment. And both felt more or less distanced from others due to their interests ad ideologies. So its natural that the Religious Preacher and a Philosopher King saw kindred spirits in eachother. He was also pretty much the only one who cared about Angron in some way and actually ran the ritual which transformed Angron into a Daemon Prince, thus freeing him of the Butcher's Nails and premature death. He even seems to be good friends with Leman Russ, referenced in Betrayer given that Russ read something Lorgar wrote and thought that was some spiritual shit worth remembering, which is pretty significant considering how down-to-earth this guy was. Also in The First Heretic, Magnus tells Lorgar that Russ argued for preserving Lorgar's place in the crusade and sparing him excommunication when the Emps was pondering kicking Lorgar to the curb. More significantly, when Lorgar asked Russ and Magnus to stop fighting, they '''actually listened.''' The two Primarchs who just might have had the most mutual hatred stopped fighting because Lorgar asked them to. And with this comes another major topic with Lorgar:

Emperor was generally unsatisfied with the slow rate of reclamation by the Word Bearers and due to this regarded him as one of the most inefficient Primarchs. However, this may rather show how incredibly moronic the Emperor could be in his judgement. Yes, Lorgar wasnt as fast in conquests as his brethren. HOWEVER, there are these factors to be considered:
#Lorgar rarely even engaged in combat. Most of the reclaimed planets were won by word and faith, rather than fire and sword.
#Consequently from the first one, planets under Lorgar were not been left as [[Perturabo|ruined]], [[Konrad_Curze|terrorized]], [[Angron|Butchered]], [[Mortarion|Desolate shitholes]], and newly acquired, intact planets would start giving immediate benefits to the Imperium. In fact, alongside Dorn and Guilliman, Lorgar was one of the rarer conquerors who left the conquered place in BETTER state than before the conquest.
#One of the main reasons for the slow rate of reclamation by Lorgar was because he spent large amount of time spreading his ideology among local population. Due to his charisma and religious zeal, he would convince the population of the benefits of Imperial rule, how great and mighty humans would be when they would rule the entire Galaxy and so on, to the point that the citizens would become fiercely loyal to the Imperium, rendering a rebellion practically impossible.
Now, with these factors in mind, a [[Reasonable_Marines|Reasonable ruler]] who is not [[Emperor|headachingly retarded]], once he would find out what kind of person he was dealing with, would perhaps simply relieve him from his military duties, and instead would appoint him as head of the Imperial Propaganda or Diplomatic apparatus, where his talents would be used at maximum efficiency. Angron or Mortarion might have been able to make war more effectively, but only Horus was Lorgar's equal in diplomacy. Even when grudging with his brothers he was quite diplomatic, and he sincerely believed he could eventually convince everyone else about his point of view on the Emperor's divinity.

He was also terrifyingly powerful Psyker, but refused to use his gift for the same reasons. He ceased this emo shit after falling to Chaos, turning into a bad ass sorcerer able to rival Magnus, or at least Magnus's psychic projection, which is still far beyond any 40k-level monster-Psyker capabilities. In fact he was the third or forth most powerful (once-Imperial) Psyker in the galaxy: second to only Big E, Magnus and maybe Malcador. (A couple of daemons and [[Eldrad|a certain dick]] might give him a run for his money as well if you consider non-humans.)

He also bore the greatest physical similarity to the Emperor: under his golden tattoos he looked exactly like a younger version of Big E's true form (yeah, yeah, da Emprah told Corax that he had no true form, but then he also said that daemons were minor xenos pests, so figure that out yourself). He has also dabbled in [[Meme|Trolling]] shown in one scene in ''Know No Fear'', where he's pretty much blatantly trolling Guilliman.

<blockquote>

Lorgar: ''Have you lost your temper, Roboute?''

Guilliman: ''I am going to gut you.''

Lorgar: ''You have lost your temper.''

</blockquote>

Take that BITCH.

His actions during the Heresy mainly consisted of keeping Angron on a slaughter path as well as saving his life. He repeatedly tried to get Magnus to join the traitors but realised that he was totally out of his depth in terms of warpcraft. Unfortunately, Lorgar turned out to be closer in mentality to Erebus than he would ever like to admit. When Horus was elevated by the gods on Molech, Lorgar grew frustrated about how Horus would not submit to Chaos and received a vision of his leadership leading to their defeat on Terra. When Horus was wounded by the Emperor's Spear, Lorgar sensed the opportunity to usurp him as Warmaster as well as High Priest of Arch-Chaos.

Suffice to say that it did not go to plan and a revived Horus curb-stomped him publicly in front of the entire massed traitor forces on Ullanor. He would have killed Lorgar but relented at the last minute, banishing him from his court and telling him that Lorgar would die if Horus ever saw him again (which turned out to be moot later but partly explained why Lorgar isolated himself from his brothers afterwards). A large portion of the Word Bearers legion swore themselves to Horus at that point and Lorgar warned the Warmaster that his refusal to submit to the Chaos Gods would lead to the traitors' defeat. One can only assume that following Horus' death that there was a lot of smug "I told you so"-ing on Lorgar's end.

==Post Heresy==
[[Image:Lorgar portrait.jpg|thumb|left|'''GREETINGS MEWLING CORPSE SLAVE, DO YOU HAVE A FEW MINUTES TO HEAR ABOUT THE GOOD WORD OF CHAOS UNDIVIDED?''']]
[[Image:Lorgar.jpg|200px|thumb|right|Note that his [[Galactic Partridges|purity seals have purity seals]] and his scalp is inscribed with holy scripture. Because if you are going to do it, you have to do it right.]]
So now he's the Daemon-Primarch of the [[Word Bearers]], the guys who make the rest of the Chaos Space Marines look like all around swell secular humanist types. They're kind of like Jehovah's Witnesses, except instead of knocking on your door and telling you about Jesus they knock down your door and ask you which end of a daemon summoning you want to be on. This tends to make Chaos' otherwise awful selling pitch seem oddly compelling. He also has a particular hatred for atheists, so he loathes his atheist daddy Emprah and the [[Tau|weeaboo space communists]] more than he hates everything else.

In a supreme twist of irony, the [[Ecclesiarchy]] of the Imperium (which is the primary target for the Word Bearers during conquest) derives most if not all of their religious texts from Lorgar. That Bible they administer to citizens daily? The prayers quadrillions of soldiers and civilians utter daily in an effort to believe? That devotion to the Emperor? All fostered and nurtured by Lorgar. All brought about by him and his Legion's sheer devotion. And all that shit works (Grey Knights are protected from Daemons by their faith while the latter fear holy water blessed by the Ecclesiarchy, Sisters of Battle pull out miracles and have (a) freakin' Living Saint(s) resurrected by the Emperor, etc), leading to countless jokes about it being Lorgar's plan all along. In short, Lorgar is responsible for both the Heresy that marked the end of the Imperium's golden age, and the only thing that would save Humanity in its long evolution to a fully psychic race. That being said, Lorgar is actually so ashamed of the Lectitio Divinitatus (the primary holy book of the Imperium he wrote) that bringing it up is a surefire way to have your body and soul obliterated in such horrific ways [[anal circumference|that no words exist in the myriad tongues of the universe to fully encompass the unholy rape you would receive]]. Seriously, just... don't. Now just imagine his face when he hears that [[Roboute_Guilliman|Gorillaman]] himself is slowly becoming convinced of the Emperor's divinity and is reading a copy of the Lectitio Divinitatus with Lorgar's autograph....

Since the Heresy, Lorgar's notable achievements consist of becoming a [[Daemon Prince]] of [[Chaos Undivided]] (and, yes, that is technically possible, and it was also the standard before GW decided to retcon) before doing sweet fuck all for several millennia. Seriously, at least while [[Magnus the Red|Magnus]] pretends to be plotting the downfall of Man or something while he sits in his tower screaming "[[JUST AS PLANNED]]" at the top of his lungs whenever he pours milk over his daemon cereal, he actually got off his red ass and led the [[Thousand Sons]] to wreck the [[Space Wolves]]' shit on their own home planet. ([[Fail|Twice.]]) Lorgar, though? The lazy fuckwit has just been holed up on Sicarus meditating and traversing the warp, secretly "Crying and weeping in guilt for what he has done" quote unquote by our [[Spiritual Liege|spiritual liege]] himself, [[Roboute Guilliman|Rawbutt Derpyman]]. Congratulations, [[Chaos Gods]], you have created the Lovecraftian equivalent of that unemployed asshole friend who won't get off your couch and who is secretly [[Cyrus|emo]]. If you believe Magnus, Lorgar has already achieved what the Chaos Gods wanted by setting up this stalemate between Chaos and the Imperium so he's entitled to some well-earned ruminating on scripture, but fuck that because it's boring. Also because it runs totally counter to the beliefs that Lorgar develops during ''The First Heretic'', which are all about mankind embracing Chaos and everyone becoming willingly possessed like his Gal Vorbak.

Apparently he was actually working on some new daemon summoning techniques, which he taught Abbadon before the Thirteenth Black Crusade. Which on the whole... is pathetic, that's like something they should be doing on their off hours when not busy slaughtering Imperial worlds. Given that Abbadon's the only other big player on the Chaos side who's still devoted to toppling the Imperium in the name of Chaos Undivided, you'd think Lorgar would be beside him every step of the way. The prevailing theory is that he's busy <strike>Indulging Slaanesh's churchboy fantasies</strike> "contemplating the mysteries of Chaos". Although if you want to be logical, (if logic could be applied to chaos or 40k in general) him being the daemon prince of chaos undivided means that he must execute the will of chaos undivided, which is, incidentally, divided, and as such, he can't do shit.

As of M42 where shit has most definitely hit the fan in the form of the Great Rift splitting the Galaxy in half, Lorgar has apparently been seen leading the Word Bearers on their Unholy Crusades. So looks like he's finally gotten off his lazy ass! However [[Corvus Corax]] is now consumed by the singular purpose of getting revenge on his traitorous brothers. Corax descended on Lorgar and spoiled his otherwise magnificent appearance after ten thousand years busy doing fucking nothing. Surprisingly the balance of power did not change between the two, and Lorgar, again, ran for his life, as his [[Konrad Curze|original backup]] seemed to be too busy being dead to help him again.

==On The Tabletop==
{| class=wikitable
! || Pts || WS || BS || S || T || W || I || A || Ld || Sv
|-
| '''Lorgar Aurelian:''' || 375 || 6 || 6 || 6 || 6 || 5 || 6 || 4 || 10 || 2+
|}
[[Image:Lorgar Aurelian.jpg|300px|thumb|right|Lorgar's model, the <s>first</s> second in [[Forge World]]'s Primarch line (Angron was first). Unfortunately, while very nice, it shows in his static pose and (relatively) standard design of power armour. This said, Lorgar's armor is noted in the First Heretic to be as plain as regular Mk3.]]
Lorgar may be the cheapest of the Primarchs, and he may have one the lowest statlines amongst them (aside from a decent initiative), but do not let this fool you - used properly he can be one of the most powerful Primarchs.

First off, he magnifies the strong points of his legion: Word Bearers are already quite brave with 3d6 morale tests (discarding the highest dice). Lorgar makes them all Ld10 (for Morale and Pinning tests, does not require LoS), and immune to Fear, effectively turning them into the bravest non-fearless army in 30k bar the [[Adeptus Custodes]] and [[Solar Auxilia]], but only if the squad sees him, i.e., has LoS. Hell, even in 40k none could rival their resolve (apart from Tyranids until you kill their synapse, or Deathwing Terminators). Word Bearers are quite good in melee with their compulsory psyker-chaplains, ability to re-roll 1s for sweeping advance and cheap melee-friendly squad-wide buffing through Dark Channeling; Lorgar enhances their close combat by granting +1 to charge distance and combat resolution (LoS needed). He also confers his crusader rule to any unit he joins, further increasing the chances of successful sweeping advances if they win in melee.

As for Lorgar himself, he wields ''Illuminarum'', a S8 AP2 MС [[Power Weapon|power maul]] with Smash; a MC S6 AP3 pistol for +1A and 2+/4++ armour which grants 3++ against ''any psychic empowered attacks (including witchfire powers and blows from Force Weapons)'', but against Witchfires is a bit redundant, because Lorgar would likely Deny any spell targeted at him with his rerollable DtW on 3+. He can also force one model or unit to reroll all 5-6 to hit and to wound against him once per game, which is obviously his "I win" button in challenges.

Lorgar's main strength is that he's a ML2 psyker with access to Divination and Telekinesis. Though he got a handicap, he can only harness warp charges on 5+ ''(amended for 7th edition by FAQ)'' this matters very little, because he can (and should) be upgraded to ML3, where he harnesses warp charges on 3+ and gains the freedom to pick powers manually at the start of the game instead of randomly rolling them. This is where he starts turning into rape machine, as both Divination and Telekinesis have quite a murderfuck set of powers normally compensated by the fact that there's only a small chance of getting the good ones. While losing access to Telepathy (and Invisibility by extension) in his revised rules is a bit of a setback since he can't cheese his way through most Primarch vs. Primarch fights like he used to, the variety of supporting powers that Divination provide are a fine compensation for that. Precognition seems to take the mantle of his "I win" button, making him both tougher and killier.

Assuming you take Lorgar ascended to pick your powers, tailor your needs to suit your opponent. Precognition, as previously mentioned, turns him into a challenge monster who gets to reroll all of the things. Objuration Mechanicum is another solid power, getting easy hull points off vehicle squadrons or making units kill themselves that rely on volume of fire to cause wounds in the shooting phase. Misfortune is particularly good against MEQ units to begin with and the ability to simply have it when you need it is equally good as a result. Should you sit Lorgar back with a heavy support squad full of high damage weapons, laugh at all the death inflicted from Perfect Timing denying cover saves (though that's a strange use of a 450 (when upgraded) point model). Really, your imagination is the limit and the ability to have the power that will benefit you the most against the army you're playing is worth the 75 point Lorgar upgrade, all day every day.

===Lorgar VS other Primarchs:===
<div class="toccolours mw-collapsible mw-collapsed" style="100%">
Primarch fighting, while fun to see isn't a very competitive thing to do as it'll usually tie up both Primarchs for the entire game without either of them dying (and Lorgar's abilities and statline mean he's much better suited to fighting marines where he can Instant Death them), with that in mind this section is how Lorgar fares against other Primarchs Mathhammer wise. Please note that all the various abilities, with the exception of Blind and Lorgar's powers, are taken into account (Blind is ignored because it never helps nor hinders the outcome of the fights, and psychic powers are too random to apply to this and don't work often enough to sway the fight) and the match-ups assume the Primarchs are the only ones involved in the fighting, so various abilities like Angron's "The Butcher's Nails" and Rampage do not provide any bonuses. Note too this mathhammer is only based on regular Lorgar.
<div class="mw-collapsible-content">

* Lorgar VS Horus (using The Talon)
**Round 1: Horus hits 3.444 times, wounds 1.775 times, 0.887 times after saves and IWND will take that down to 0.554 wounds at the start of the next turn.
**Round 2: Horus hits 4 times, wounds 3.554, 1.777 times after saves and IWND will take that down to 1.444 wounds at the start of the next turn.
**Lorgar hits Horus 3 times, wounds 2.5 times, 0.833 after saves and IWND will take that to 0.5 wounds at the start of the next turn.
**Lorgar loses this fight. BADLY.

* Lorgar VS Angron
**Round 1: Angron hits 4.888 times, wounds 3.846 times, 1.923 times after saves and IWND will take that down to 1.59 wounds at the start of the next turn.
**Round 2: Angron hits 4 times, wounds 3.333, 1.666 times after saves and IWND will take that down to 1.333 wounds at the start of the next turn.
**Lorgar hits Angron 3 times, wounds 2.5 times, 0.833 after saves and FNP and IWND will take that to 0.5 wounds at the start of the next turn.
**Lorgar loses this fight. BADLY.

*Lorgar VS Fulgrim
**Round 1 (Laer Blade): Fulgrim hits 4.147 times, wounds 1.726 times, 0.863 times after saves and IWND will take that down to 0.530 wounds at the start of the next turn.
**Round 2 (Laer Blade): Fulgrim hits 4.666 times, wounds 2.333 times, 1.166 times after saves and IWND will take that down to 0.833 wounds at the start of the next turn.
**Round 1 (FireBlade): Fulgrim hits 4.147 times, wounds 2.456 times, 1.228 times after saves and IWND will take that down to 0.895 wounds at the start of the next turn.
**Round 2 (FireBlade): Fulgrim hits 5.333 times, wounds 3.556 times, 1.778 times after saves and IWND will take that down to 1.444 wounds at the start of the next turn.
**Lorgar hits Fulgrim 3 times, wounds 2.5 times, 0.833 after saves and IWND will take that to 0.5 wounds at the start of the next turn.
**Lorgar loses this fight. BADLY.
**Note: If Fulgrim is concussed he loses a significant amount of damage, but even at his worst (Laer, no CoT and concussed) he matches Lorgar's output and will beat him one turn earlier.

* Lorgar VS Mortarion
**Round 1: Mortarion hits 2.961 times, wounds 1.752 times, 0.876 times after saves and IWND will take that down to 0.543 wounds at the start of the next turn.
**Round 2: Mortarion hits 3.333 times, wounds 2.222 times, 1.111 times after saves and IWND will take that down to 0.778 wounds at the start of the next turn.
**Lorgar hits Mortarion 3 times, wounds 2 times, 1 after saves and IWND will take that to 0.444 wounds at the start of the next turn.
**Lorgar loses this fight. BADLY.

* Lorgar VS Ferrus
**Round 1: Ferrus hits 2.37 times, wounds 1.865 times (Forgebreaker)/1.58 times (Bare Hands), 0.932 times after saves (Forgebreaker)/0.79 times (Bare Hands) after saves and IWND will take that down to 0.599/0.457 wounds at the start of the next turn.
**Round 2: Ferrus hits 2.666 times, wounds 2.221 times (Forgebreaker)/1.777 times (Bare Hands), 1.11 times after saves (Forgebreaker)/0.888 times (Bare Hands) after saves and IWND will take that down to 0.777/0.555 wounds at the start of the next turn.
**Lorgar hits 3 times, wounds 2 times, 0.667 wounds after saves and IWND will take that down to 0.333 wounds at the start of the next turn.
**Lorgar loses this fight. BADLY.

* Lorgar VS Konrad Curze
**Round 1: Curze hits 3.555 times, wounds 2.369 times, 1.184 times after saves and IWND will take that down to 0.851 wounds at the start of the next turn.
**Round 2: Curze hits 4 times, wounds 3 times, 1.5 times after saves and IWND will take that down to 1.167 wounds at the start of the next turn.
**Lorgar hits 3 times, wounds 2.5 times, 1.25 wounds after saves and IWND will take that down to 0.917 wounds at the start of the next turn.
**Lorgar loses this fight. BADLY.

* Lorgar VS Vulkan
**Round 1: Vulkan hits 2.37 times, wounds 1.865 times, 0.932 times after saves and IWND will take that down to 0.599 wounds at the start of the next turn.
**Round 2: Vulkan hits 2.666 times, wounds 2.221 times, 1.11 times after saves and IWND will take that down to 0.777 wounds at the start of the next turn.
**Lorgar hits 3 times, wounds 2 times, 0.667 wounds after saves and 0.111 wounds after IWND.
**Lorgar loses this fight. BADLY.

* Lorgar VS Perturabo
**Round 1: Perturabo hits 2.37 times (both types), wounds 1.58 times (Normal)/1.865 times (Forgebreaker), 0.79 wounds (Normal)/0.932 wounds (Forgebreaker) after saves and IWND will take that down to 0.457/0.599 wounds at the start of the next turn.
**Round 2: Perturabo hits 2.666 times (both types), wounds 1.777 times (Normal)/2.221 times (Forgebreaker), 0.888 wounds (Normal)/1.11 wounds (Forgebreaker) after saves and IWND will take that down to 0.555/0.777 wounds at the start of the next turn.
**Lorgar hits 3 times, wounds 2.5 times, 0.833 wounds after saves and 0.5 wounds after IWND.
**Lorgar loses this fight. With Forgebreaker, BADLY.

* Lorgar VS Roboute Guilliman
**Lorgar hits 3 times, wounds 2.5 times, 1 times after saves and reroll and IWND will take that down to 0.667.
**Guilliman Round 1: hits 2.778 times, wounds 1.85 times, 0.926 times after saves and IWND will take that down to 0.593 wounds at the start of the next turn.
**Guilliman Round 2 and thereafter: hits 3.333 times, wounds 2.963 times, 1.48 times after saves and IWND will take that down to 1.15 wounds at the start of the next turn.
**Lorgar loses this fight. BADLY.

* Lorgar VS Rogal Dorn
**Round 1: Rogal Dorn hits 2.37 times (Normal)/1.259 times (Sundering Blow), wounds 1.579 times (normal)/1.164 times (Sundering Blow), 0.789/0.582 wounds after saves and IWND will take that down to 0.456/0.249 wounds at the start of the next turn.
**Round 2: Rogal Dorn hits 2.666 times (Normal)/1.333 times (Sundering Blow), wounds 2 times (normal)/1.295 times (Sundering Blow), 1/0.648 wounds after saves and IWND will take that down to 0.667/0.315 wounds at the start of the next turn.
**Lorgar hits 3 times, wounds 2 times, 1 times after saves and IWND will take that down to 0.667 wounds at the start of the next turn.
**A close fight! It depends on who rolls IWND first - if Dorn does, he has a very good chance of beating Lorgar in 6 rounds (4.98 wounds), but if he doesn't Lorgar will Concuss him and win next turn by striking first. If Lorgar starts first, the odds shift further in his favor.

* Lorgar VS Corvus Corax
**Round 1: Corvus hits 4.741 times (Scourge)/3.555 times (Shadow-walk), wounds 3.16 times (Scourge)/2.369 times (Shadow-walk), 1.58 wounds (Scourge)/1.184 wounds (Shadow-walk) after saves and IWND will take that down to 1.247/0.851 wounds at the start of the next turn.
**Round 2: Corvus hits 5.333 times (Scourge)/4 times (Shadow-walk), wounds 3.999 times (Scourge)/3 times (Shadow-walk), 1.999 wounds (Scourge)/1.5 wounds (Shadow-walk) after saves and IWND will take that down to 1.666/1.167 wounds at the start of the next turn.
**Lorgar hits 3/2 times, wounds 2.5/1.667 times, 1.667/1.111 wounds after saves and IWND will take that down to 1.333/0.778 wounds at the start of the next turn.
**Lorgar loses this fight. BADLY.

*Lorgar VS Leman Russ
** The weakest Primarch stats-wise vs. the one built up from the ground to demolish his brothers in 1v1 fights, do you really need the maths here? With his upgraded psyker powers Lorgar does at least put up a fight before going down, but without them he gets [[rape|wrecked]]. BADLY.

* Lorgar VS Jaghatai Khan
**Jaghatai hits 5.333 times, wounds 2.666 times, 1.333 wounds after saves and IWND will take that down to 1
**Lorgar hits 3 times, wounds 2 times, 0.667 after saves and IWND will take that to 0.333 wounds at the start of the next turn.
**Lorgar loses BADLY.

* Lorgar VS Sanguinius
** Lorgar hits 3 times, wounds 2.5 times, 1.25 wounds after saves and IWND will take that down to 0.917 wounds at the start of the next turn.
** Sanguinius Round 1: hits 3.889 times (assuming Lorgar uses Dark Fortune), wounds 2.881 times, 1.44 wounds after saves and IWND will take that down to 1.107 wounds at the start of the next turn.
*** Sanguinius on the charge: hits 4.444 times (assuming Lorgar uses Dark Fortune), wounds 3.959 times (including HoW), 1.979 wounds after saves and IWND will take that down to 1.646 wounds at the start of the next turn.
** Sanguinius Round 2+: hits 4 times, wounds 3.556 times, 1.778 wounds after saves and IWND will take that down to 1.444 wounds at the start of the next turn.
** Lorgar loses BADLY.

* Lorgar VS Alpharius
**Alpharius round 1: hits 3.333 times, wounds 1.9444 times, 0.972 wounds after saves and IWND will take that down to 0.639 wounds at the start of the next turn.
**Alpharius round 2: hits 3.889 times, wounds 2.268 times, 1.134 wounds after saves and IWND will take that down to 0.801 wounds at the start of the next turn.
**Lorgar hits 3 times, wounds 2.5 times, 1.25 times after saves and IWND will take that down to 0.917 wounds at the start of the next turn.
**Lorgar wins thanks to Concussive!

* Lorgar VS Magnus
** Magnus (round 1): hits 2.222 times, wounds 1.728 times and 0.576 after saves which IWND will take down to 0.242 wounds at the start of next turn
** Magnus: hits 2.667 times, wounds 2.222 times and 0.741 after saves which IWND will take down to 0.407 wounds at the start of next turn
** Lorgar: hits 2 times, wounds 1.667 times and 0.833 after saves which IWND will take down to 0.5 wounds at the start of the next turn
** Lorgar's save is increased to 3++ against attacks from Force Weapons, giving him a mutual kill or narrowly win if he concusses Magnus in the penultimate round.
*** '''Happy psychic fun:'''
*** Magnus with Iron Arm and Warp Speed: hits 4.667 times, wounds 3.889 times, [[FAIL|0.432 after saves]] and IWND will take down to 0.099 wounds at the start of next turn
*** Lorgar with Precog: hits 2.778 times, wounds 1.543 times, 0.772 times after saves and IWND will take down to 0.439 wounds at the start of the next turn
*** Lorgar with Precog crushes Magnus (after a long time), the rerolls to hit and wound more than makes up for Magnus' aura and boosted Toughness, and [[Shield-Captain|rerollable 3++]] neuters Magnus' damage. Magnus needs Iron Arm, Warp Speed ''and'' Endurance to outlast him. Or roll Precognition himself with any Bio-blessing (although the chance he gets everything he needs and passes every test without any of them being denied is incredibly low, making it more likely Lorgar would win than not).

'''TLDR version:''' The weakest Primarch? Maybe, if you don't consider his psychic powers. But if you do...?
Dirty Trick: Upgrade Lorgar to Lorgar Transfigured and give him Precognition. With this he will beat any other Primarch barring Horus (and a maxed out Angron), and even the Warmaster will be hard pressed in this fight, he can also outright cheat in this fight either by summoning Deamons to assist him (which allows him to beat everyone) or he can get possessed so a Daemon can take revenge for him when he's on his last wound.

</div>
</div>

{{Primarchs}}
{{Daemons-Characters}}
[[Category:Chaos]]
[[Category:Word Bearers]]

AMX Auf1

2020-10-31T14:38:46Z

2A02:1811:5180:A200:EC3D:29FD:FA1D:618:

[[File:TFRAB1-14.jpg|right|300px|thumb|Metal bawks. With big gun.]]
{{topquote| Ultima Ratio Regum - The last argument of kings|motto engraved on the cannons of King Louis XIV}}
The ''Canon de 155 Automoteur Modèle F1'' to give its it full name, is as its name implies a self-propelled artillery gun, based on the AMX-30 chassis. Around the time where the Cold War gets hot in Team Yankee, the French were in the process of updating their park of SPG's to 'NBC' standard, and starting from an already proven design was cheaper and efficienter than strarting over from scratch.

==In Team Yankee==
[[File:TFRAB1-33.jpg|left|300px|thumb|Les Stats Monsieur]]

The AUF1 is the divisional artillery unit for the French Army and totes the 155mm gun, in line with the 'totally coincidental' NATO standardizations in caliber going on at the time. You can buy a battery of 3 or 4 AUF1s for 3 points per vehicle or 5 for 16 points which gives you a unit of killing artillery; terrible for smoke and overcosted for pinning infantry but excellent at mashing BMP/BTR companies. 2+ firepower ensures that most things that are hit, die. Infantry can take a few salvos but should expect light casualties from a single salvo.

Interestingly, AUF1s come with autoloaders which reduces the score to hit by one. This means that there is literally no reason to take 4 AUF1s when 3 will perform the same job equally well, hitting enemies with a -1 modifier to hit (3+ to hit becomes 2+ to hit!). At 9 points for 3 guns hitting with a -1 modifier, it is the most cost-effective 2+ FP artillery piece if you only wish to shell the enemy without bothering about fancy warheads that those silly Americans have. It is a very dangerous gun to ignore, and is guaranteed to vaporize chunks of your enemy's BMP/BTR blobs. Infantry? Not so much.

Statlines are similar to most other French units, meaning the AUF1 is capable of assaulting enemy units with assault 4+ and counterattack 4+ if you decided your artillery should fix bayonets and charge. They also come with skill 3+, comboing nicely with 'shoot and scoot' orders if you would like to break line of sight without losing your firepower.

The AUF1 competes with the AMX-30 and AMX-10s for the light anti-armour role. Even worse, it is the only artillery unit for the French at the moment. It is suitable for defensive and infantry lists, with infantry holding the line while AUF1s gradually pound out sections of the enemy. Armoured lists should take other units, however: you are better off spending your points on utility like air defence and recon.

==IRL==
[[File:AuF1 of Saudi Arabia.JPEG|300px|right|thumb|A Saudi metal bawks, inspiring Games Workshop designers worldwide.]]
It looks like a box on top of a tank chassis and...thats literally what it is. The designers took a page from German and Soviet WWII design and glued a 155mm cannon to the turret ring of an AMX-30 MBT, and gave it some bullet-resistant armor to protect the crew and ammo from shrapnel and small arms fire; birthing a design that belongs in a Big Mek's werkshop and not an actual military.

Derpy looks aside, the AUF1 was actually a reliable artillery piece for the Cold War. While it lacked the more advanced warheads of other well-funded militaries, with about 25km of maximum range and the ability to lower its gun and fire at things directly if needed its 155mm shell were guaranteed to ruin almost anybody's day when used correctly.

{{French Forces in Team Yankee}}
{{Iraqi Forces in Team Yankee}}

[[Category:Vehicles]]

Tony Ackland

2020-10-30T11:16:15Z

2A02:1811:5180:A200:EC3D:29FD:FA1D:618:

{{stub}}
'''Tony Ackland''' is an artist who has worked on pieces found in many works in the tabletop gaming genre over the years, although his primary claim to fame is quite literally designing most of the [[Chaos]] and [[Daemon]] aesthetic for [[Games Workshop]] and [[Citadel Miniatures|Citadel]].

==The Legend==
Tony Ackland grew up like a typical early modern nerd, inspired by both science fiction and fantasy short stories and movies, particularly by the fantastic cover art to movie posters, music albums, and pulp magazines.
Originally a freelance miniature sculptor, Ackland met [[Bryan Ansell]] at a convention and sculpted a few pieces and provides artwork for Ansell's cofounded company [[Asgard Miniatures]]. After Ansell sold his stock to his partners in 1981 and went to work with [[Ian Livingstone]] and [[Steve Jackson]] to found [[Citadel Miniatures]] while Ackland followed his friend to do the same work for them.

While initially Ansell butter heads with Livingstone and Jackson over company policy followed by selling his shares and a leave of absence, the poor management of the other two lead to them to put Ansell entirely in charge of Citadel upon his return. Ansell immediately hired Ackland as a fulltime employee.

Ackland and the rest of the artists shared the workload between advert design, miniature concept, and illustrations. Early on the plan was for Citadel to make a name for itself by producing licensed work for [[Ral Partha]], so Ackland took inspiration from the work of [[Tom Meier]] in his designs which notably resulted in [[Dark Elves (Warhammer Fantasy)|Druchii]] aesthetics. Plans for working with Ral Partha ended when Ansell hired [[Perry Brothers|Michael and Alan Perry]], two very talented sculptors who preferred a historical look to the typical high fantasy of the time, and the three sculptors worked together to produce the unique Warhammer aesthetic of historical fantasy.

By 1983 Citadel was the most financially successful part of the Games Workshop company under Ansell, while Livingstone and Jackson had used the [[Fighting Fantasy]] books to become millionaires. The two sold the company to Ansell with the result being, according to Ackland, more artistic freedom but more "decision by committee" resulting in Ackland focusing his work on [[Flame Productions]], the Games Workshop branch that put out [[Warhammer Fantasy Roleplay]] which at the time consisted of just Ackland, [[Graeme Davis]], and [[Mike Brunton]]. Flame was treated as a separate company from Games Workshop, technically making Ackland a part-time employee, and the trio worked on various RPG supplements as well as [[White Dwarf]] articles (and articles for [[Warlock (Magazine)|Warlock]], a White Dwarf spinoff).
Ackland was put on the team for an RPG project called Confrontation, but most of his work on it was never released as it was decided that the adult-themed game set in the 40k universe should have the themes toned down for a younger audience and extra incentive made to buy miniatures, the result being [[Necromunda]].

By the tail end of third edition Warhammer Fantasy, Ansell was inspired to create a supplement for the forces of evil in the setting. Initially <strike>ripping off</strike> inspired by [[Michael Moorcock]] works, Ansell created a general theme of four [[Chaos Gods]] amd their names which he passed to [[John Blanche]] to draw, then after grouping with the creator of both Warhammers [[Rick Priestley]] to finish the write-up the entire work was passed to Tony Ackland to draw up everything other than [[Khorne]], [[Tzeentch]], [[Nurgle]], and [[Slaanesh]] themselves. Ackland let the inspiration flow, and created desolate hellscapes, nightmarish clusterfucks, all Daemons and mutants, the mortal followers of Chaos, the realms of the gods, and their armies. His work was directly used by the sculptors to create every Daemon used today in Warhammer.
[[Realm Of Chaos]] was released in two parts, [[Slaves To Darkness]] and The [[Lost and the Damned]], in 1988 and 1990 respectively.
RoC was intended to be one book, but the Ackland and [[Ian Miller]] (as well as a handful of freelance) illustrations took up so much space and were deemed necessary that the split in two was necessary.

Meanwhile [[John Wagner]] and [[Alan Grant]], the writers of the former Games Workshop licemse Judge Dredd, were hired part-time to create a fifth Chaos God [[Malal]], with Ackland put on max speed producing everything Malal to catch him up with the other four Chaos Gods (Malal hadn't made it into RoC because of copyright issues nobody on staff seemed to understand or care about until that point, as seen below) while the two worked on Malal himself through a comic series about his Champion [[Kaleb Daark]]. Unfortunately the two came to disagreements during the writing, which resulted in them lawyering up to decide custody of Kaleb and Malal. This shocked Games Workshop, who apparently were unaware British copyright laws ensured part-timers keep what they create...and most of the concept teams had been shifted to part-time because it was cheaper...

The last work Ackland did for Games Workshop was the Warhammer Fantasy Roleplay supplement [[Plundered Vault]] in 2005. Later that year Games Workshop issued a list of former employees who need to collect their original pieces, with Ackland at the top of the list. After that, the saga was over and the heart of Chaos officially gone.

==Creations==
* Chaos - All generic types of Daemons and the general look of everything Chaos was the product of Ackland's imagination.
* Dark Elves and [[Dark Eldar]] - The look of the Dark (knife-ears) were inspired by taking Ral Partha Elves and making them twisted and evil during the period when Citadel was cooperating with Ral Partha on a united range of miniatures.
* [[Zoats]] - Ansell asked the Citadel staff to create something similar to Adzel from Polesotechnic League but less reptilian. Ackland gave him Zoats.
* [[Fimir]] - Ansell tasked Graeme Davis with creating a unique race only found in Warhammer. Graeme enlisted Ansell and said they would base it on Fomorians from Celtic myth. Ackland based his design on the depictions of the artist Alan Lee.
* Games Workshop Staff - Thanks to a love of cameos, many of the early Games Workshop staff members appear in-universe in both settings, albeit as generic characters.

[[Category:Games Workshop]]

Japan

2020-10-25T14:45:47Z

2A02:1811:5180:A200:EC3D:29FD:FA1D:618: /* Self Defense Force */

[[image:Japan-2107x1406.jpg|thumb|300px|right|Beneath the mountain. Cherry trees are blossoming forth.
My soul is at peace.]]
{{topquote|Japan is not a place which can be controlled by foreigners, for the Japanese are neither so weak nor so stupid a race as to permit this, and the King of Spain neither had nor ever could have any power or jurisdiction here.| Alessandro Valignano}}
'''Nippon''' or '''Nihon''', known to foreigners as Wa, Yamatai, Jipon, Riben, Zipangu (plus a thousand spelling variants of that) and (most commonly nowadays) '''Japan''' is a country. It is a series of several thousand islands, the exact number of which depends both on the definition of "island" (minimum size) and if you ask them, or either the Russians or the Chinese. Despite the many islands, most of the population is centered on four main ones (Hokkaido, Honshu, Kyushu and Shikoku). It is nominally an [[Empire]], but of the past thousand years an Emperor has held power beyond figurehead for less than 80 of them. [[Samurai]], [[Ninja]], [[Oni]], [[Tengu]], and [[Kitsune]] originate here. The most common religions (and those most likely to have analogs in a fantasy setting) are Shinto, various types of Buddhism and a Christian minority. Unlike many countries, the two major religions aren't entirely mutually exclusive, though no one would outright list their religion as "multiple". It is often said that the Japanese are born Shinto, marry Christian, and die Buddhist. Native systems include ''[[Maid RPG]]'', ''[[Record of Lodoss War]]'', ''[[Queen's Blade]]'', and ''[[Zettai Reido]]'' as well as the CCGs ''[[Pokémon]]'', ''[[Yu-Gi-Oh]]'' and ''[[Fire Emblem|Fire Emblem Cipher]]''. The most popular game within the country however is, of all things, [[Call of Cthulhu]]. The manga [[Quick Start!!]] is also worth a mention.

== Japanese History ==

Japan's history geographically spans several million years and thousands nationally/culturally, but most fiction (even native stuff) and /tg/ only care about the following periods starting at the fairly late 1467. (with occasional rare forays into the Heian period).

*'''Heian Period''' (794-1185) - During this period, a distinctly Japanese culture started developing from the earlier Chinese Tang-influenced one. It is considered as somewhat of a high-point of Japan as culture and the imperial court were at their peak, though the shape of things to come could already be seen as the real power rested in the hands of the Fujiwara clan. Its end ushered the familiar fare of clans jockeying for the position of the shogun and thus true power in Japan.

*'''Sengoku Period''' (~1467-1603) - A succession crisis over who will become the next shogun, the man who really held power in Japan. Eventually devolves into everyone wanting the pie for himself. While this era lasted for almost 250 years, most only care about the last 40 (1560 onward) or so, when defacto unifier Oda Nobunaga began his rise to power and enough Europeans visited to document the happenings as a neutral enough third party. Everything before this is regarded as a bunch of stalemates for the most part. Gun spam was popular at the last part of this era, leading to the country having more guns per capita than anywhere else in the world at the time and the development of tactics that would last up till the introduction of the metallic cartridge. Near the end of the conflict one of the largest powers led an invasion of the Korean peninsula which ended in a stalemate and withdrawal (since these forces had more important things to do back home). Both sides are still butthurt about it to this day, especially thanks to the repeat during World War II.

*'''Edo Period''' (1603-1868) - After the reunification of the land a long period of peace ensued. A few decades into this however a brief Christian rebellion led to the expulsion of foreigners and began the sakoku ("closed state") dictate where minimal outside trade occurred. However, there was still some progress during the seclusion - agricultural tech got advanced and the population markedly increased, Japanese intellectuals like Motoori Norinaga began pondering what it meant to be truly Japanese (apparently it was haiku) and the trade with the Dutch at Nagasaki slowly introduced western learning and science to Japan. This seclusion would last till July 8th 1853 when an American fleet led by Commodore Matthew Perry arrived in Edo to forcibly reopen trade. This set off a widespread division and panic in the government on what to do.

*'''Meiji Period''' (1868-1912) - In 1868-1869 the boy who would become known as Emperor Meiji took advantage of this panic to seize power back from the shogunate in a relatively short and bloodless war. Under his rule the country would refuse to bend over and become a colony like many primitive nations at the time had. It quickly modernized, abolished the caste system, replacing the samurai with a conscript army, and became a world power onto itself. The era is generally seen as a time when the western influences were at odds with Japanese traditions, many of which were perceived as backwards only to be glorified again a few decades later. In 1894-95 Japan would crush China in the Sino-Japanese war and establish itself as the dominant power in Asia. 1904-1905 they would crush Russia in a totally unexpected victory, something that ''really'' got them noticed. The era ended with Meiji's death in 1912.

*'''Taishō Period''' (1912-1926) - The rule of his son till 1926. Largely seen as a period of stability following the rapid change of the Meiji era. This period is also seen as a time when Japan was experimenting with democracy, seeing the rise of a number of political parties that would eventually be pushed to near-irrelevance once the army junta took sufficient hold on power. The country's entry into World War I is the main thing of note here. During the war the Japanese navy dominated the pacific. This showed the victory in the Russo-Japanese war wasn't a fluke scared the shit out of the rest of the world. Also, Einstein visited Japan in 1922 during his world tour and liked it (especially the women).

*'''Shōwa Period''' (1926-1989) - The rule of ''his'' son. Best known for the country's role in World War II. The politics became increasingly influenced by the military and the "evil customs" of the past (aka. Shinto, Samurai and Bushido) returned in a forceful but arguably corrupted manner. While this era would last up till the Emperor's death in 1989, the Emperor was reduced to a figurehead after the country's defeat in 1945 (and it's debatable if he was more than a puppet for the past several years before that). Thanks to the US needing a bulkhead against communist China and the industriousness of the people, Japan recovered quickly and sprang up to be the second most powerful economy on the planet before crony capitalism and financial speculation brought it all down in the 90s.

*'''Post-War Shōwa, Heisei and Reiwa periods''' (1926-20XX) - Beyond this Japan is just another first-world country for /tg/ purposes. The two most acute issues Japan is facing are the demographic decline and the threat of rising China. Very little non-native fiction has modern Japan as it's primary setting, though it is a stock foreign destination. Japan is however a relatively high priority country for games set in the "real world but..." to explain the differences from reality of. The exception is the [[Cyberpunk]] genre, where Japan dominates the world culturally and financially since at the time of the genre's origins it was believed that Japan would achieve ''economic'' conquest of the world in the future and despite the Lost Decade and other economic setbacks it remains as a tradition of the genre.

== Japanese Culture ==
Japan has, over the span of almost 2000 years, developed an unique blend of Chinese, Korean and (most recently) Western culture, mixed with their own stuff on top of THAT. There is no single defining characteristic that can describe it, but important elements are - honor, dedication to what one does, family/clan, industriousness and hierarchy. Some of these, such as emphasis on honor and family have been somewhat eroded by modern times, but others like loyalty to one's family/clan/corporation and deference to authority/hierarchy still endure.

One particularity of the Japanese culture is how its language was adapted to the social hierarchy. Japanese language has "politeness levels" - different ways of pronunciation and speaking reserved for those both above and below you on the social ladder. Though in itself complex, the levels can be roughly divided into 3 categories - how you'd speak to your junior/trainee/younger sibling, your equal/coworker/brother&sister and your superiors/bosses/parents&grandparents. At its core it's not that dissimilar form how you'd speak in English in a western setting (you wouldn't address your boss like you would your friend and vice-versa).

== Japanese Religion, Gods and Mythology ==
''see also: [[Mythology#Japanese_Mythology|Mythology]]''

Japanese people have always had a tendency to assimilate stuff from other cultures, most notably China and Korea. Their religion reflect this as they can be said to have "2+1" traditional religions - Shintoism, Buddhism and Christianity. Shintoism is the oldest and effectively the true native religion, being a blend of animism (meaning that all objects & creatures have a spiritual essence and worship is tied to specific places where said spirits reside) and nature/ancestor worship. Buddhism was introduced in 6th century from Korea and tended to blend with Shinto. Christianity is the youngest of the three, having been introduced by St. Francis Xavier in 16th century, it flourished for a time but a combination of distrust, European intrigues and peasant rebellions had the authorities ban it until the late 19th century.

== Japanese Magic ==
Japanese have their own traditional form of magic and it can be grouped in two broad categories.

The first one is ''Kotodama'' or "soul of language" and it is basically using the true-name type of magic to the extreme. Using specific sounds, it was believed that one could influence objects, environment, body and the soul itself.

The second comes in the form of Japanese witches. Unlike western ones which were said to derive their powers form the Devil, the Japanese breed gained their prowess form forming pacts with fox familiars. Once a fox was bribed (oftentimes promised a steady supply of food and shelter) it would confer to their witch/wizard many powers, usually related to trickery and subterfuge. A fox could turn invisible and used for spying, create illusions to trick their enemies and most feared of all - posses another human being and make them do their bidding. While lone foxes being aided were often benevolent, if one was employed by a human, they were almost always used for nefarious purposes.

== Self Defense Force ==
After World War II, Japan was hated and feared by the allied powers, and unlike West Germany it was not seen as a critical barrier to Soviet invasion. As such Japan was forced to adopt a constitution that prohibited an army, navy or air force and renounced the right to belligerency. As the Cold War heated up, NATO realized Japan ''was'' critical to preventing Communist dominance of the Pacific. Accordingly Japan was able to [[Rules Lawyer|exploit a loophole]] and create a "self defense force" that was an army in all but name. Said Self-Defense Force, as the name implies, has full authority to deal with domestic threats like terrorists and pirates threatening Japanese shipping, but any sort of offensive or overseas actions are more rigidly controlled and require the cooperation of the United States, per the bilateral security treaty.

While not the latest tech, the JSDF's equipment is absolutely modern and contains plenty of armored vehicles. Their main rifle is the Type 89, a pretty straightforward AR-18 variant that uses STANAG (M16) magazines. Unlike the British AR-18 variant, the Type 89 actually works since 1: They had the original AR-18 specs (Howa was previously subcontractor for manufacturing the AR-18) instead of a crude copy by people who never used a firearm before 2: It wasn't built by workers who knew they were going to be fired immediately afterwards. Improvements like free-floating and optics mounting are considered, but budgetary concerns prevent adoption. In December 2019 it was announced such an upgrade would finally be adopted after winning a trial, but if that will actually occur is unknown.

By the number, the Maritime Self Defense Force is at worst a match for the Russian Federation's pacific fleet, though would be heavily outnumbered if the arctic fleet or Baltic fleet reinforced them (reinforcements from the black fleet however are unlikely). While it has no aircraft carriers (Not too surprising since only the US, French, Italian, British, Spanish, Russian, Chinese and Indian navies have them. The Chinese and Indians bought them from the Soviets when they went bust. Italy and Britain with 2 each and the US with 11 are the only ones with more than one, unless you count smaller countries like Australia that have [[Original character, do not steal|helicopter carriers]]), the JMSDF has a pair of "helicopter destroyers" that were quite clearly designed with a conversion or variant that carries fixed wing aircraft in mind. The obviously intended conversion of one of these into a proper aircraft carrier was announced in December of 2018 and caused more than a bit of butt-hurt in Korea.

By the same post-war Constitution, Japan is expressly forbidden from having nuclear weapons, and their history with them makes the vast majority of the population OK with that. They do however have a large nuclear power industry and a space program, so there's no doubt they could easily make some and ICBMs to go with it if they wanted to.

==Japan Analogs in Fantasy==
* [[Nippon]] of [[Warhammer Fantasy]]
* The [[Tau Empire]] of [[Warhammer 40000]]
* Kozakura and Wa of [[Kara-Tur]]
* Jinin, The Forest of Spirits and Minkai of [[Golarion]]. Less direct analogs in the setting include Shokuro, Shenmen, and Chu Ye.
* [[Kamigawa]] of [[Magic the Gathering]]
* [[Rokugan]] from [[Legend of the Five Rings]], though while culturally Japanese it takes great influence from many other Asian cultures.

==Why living in Japan sucks==
Despite what [[Weeaboo]]s would have you believe, living in Japan stinks. Not only do they still treat minorities like shit, but their police force is also worse than any western nation you can name and are utterly corrupt. A 99%+ conviction rate is impossible without at least a quarter of that being false testimonies. In Japan everything is expensive and just about everyone is underpaid, as this is what happens when you fetishize a business culture and without a bunch of crappy books written as fetish fuel by some Russian whore.

Like Meat? Love Taco Bell or Hamburgers? Too bad, it costs way too much. Want to buy mecha models, figures or BluRay discs from your favorite anime? [[Rage|That too, is overpriced]]. Remember when we said that people are underpaid? Well, your favorite mango and animu artists are as well and are working themselves to death, for what barely counts as minimum wage. The idiots over 50 in the Diet and elsewhere than wonder why their birthrate is falling. The obvious answer is that if young people don't have money to own a home, they're not going to give a flying shit about making babies. Hell, the people who ''do'' want to start families oftentimes find that they can't do the nasty because they're still living with their parents and the walls are paper-thin (sometimes [[wikipedia:shoji|literally]]), so there's a whole industry of "love hotels" just so couples can actually find a place to do it.

Additionally they were never 'de-imperialised' the same way the Germans were 'denazified' following the WWII, which goes some way to explain why the Chinese and both Koreas still hold grudges from the second world war (despite the South Koreans and Japan sharing a <s>sugar daddy</s> powerful ally in the form of the United States), in a way that the Germany and Israel do not. If you have an older family member over the age of 50, they may still hold a grudge about this as well. Oddly enough, Taiwan does not care that as much since it would rather focus its hate against the mainland communists and many have good memories of the island's modernization under Japan.

And on top of all that is the fact that you are one of two nations that tend to get a front-row seat to the nuclear saber-rattling between the North Koreans and the Americans. Indeed, due to World War II grudges, those sabers are often rattled at you. Additionally having so many US bases means that if something ever does start between the US and China, you are going to have a front row seat to that "World War III push here to start button" even if you rather not. (Doesn't help that China holds grudges like a dwarf and while they may not want to attack their third largest trading partner, they won't shed any tears if they have to regardless of whether or not the U.S maintains a presence on your islands)

You don't have to live in Japan just because you love the country/culture, but if you absolutely must, be prepared for a lot of grueling language study (Japanese have 3 alphabets and roughly 3 "politeness levels" that you must learn to properly nativise). Also, you better have an income of about 4-5k $ per month if you hope to live in one of the bigger cities and at least 7-8k$ if you plan on having a family. One often tried way to get in is by becoming an English teacher but for that you need college-level education and special training, because if there is one thing even detractors of Japan must admit it is that they are DEAD serious about the quality of their education.

Overall: Japan has issues, not insurmountable ones nor one totally unique to it, but they are perhaps more exacerbated then most other developed nations and certainly not helped by the Geopolitics of the region.

[[Category: History]]

Traitor Legion Loyalists

2020-10-23T18:36:16Z

2A02:1811:5180:A200:EC3D:29FD:FA1D:618:

{{Wh40k-stub}}
{{Spoilers}}
[[File:TOTALLY LOYAL AND NOT AT ALL HERETICAL.jpeg|500px|thumb|right|COMPLETELY 100% LOYAL.]]
{{topquote|Thou shalt not follow a multitude to do evil.|Exodus 23:2}}

'''Traitor Legion Loyalists''' are the rare few Space Marines who, despite hailing from the Traitor Legions, stayed loyal to the Emperor and the Imperium, proving that despite what some characters in 40K think, having [[geneseed]] from a suspect source is no sure indicator of bad character. They are a very rare group of individuals given the initial purges of Loyalists elements from the Traitor Legions at the [[Battle of Isstvan III]] or by internal purges such as those enacted by “The Brotherhood” in the Word Bearers. While most of the information below has just been hints for now, this is a matter that has been popping up every now and then for the last few years.

As it happens, many of these Traitor Legion Loyalists during the [[Horus Heresy]] who did not end up in the annals of history became [[Blackshield|Blackshields]], the precursor to the 40K equivalent of the same name where a Marine with no emblems or markings can petition to join with the [[Deathwatch]] on a permanent basis, no questions asked. The term "Blackshield" by itself leaves it open as to whether the individual Marine seeks to redeem himself OR his chapter if it went rogue or was destroyed. Although Blackshields are a rarity in 40K, there were enough in 30K for such a tradition to begin and survive to the present day in the Imperium.

Those groups with enough numbers, or perhaps ties to the right people, were able to pass themselves off as successors of other Chapters after the [[Second Founding]]. [[Blood Ravens|Or their founders purged and changed their own records, so that over time, no one within the Chapter knows who their true progenitor is ]](which can lead to some [[skub|fun times]] when an Inquisitor comes across evidence that it occurred).

Generic armies of them can be fielded in 30K with the Orphans of Betrayal [[Warhammer_40,000/Tactics/Space_Marine_Legion_List_(30k)#Rites_of_War|Rite of War]]. As is fitting for a rogue, largely unsupported force, the rite doesn't provide many bonuses unless you're fighting Traitor versions of the same Legion you're fielding.

==Known Loyalist Members of the Traitor Legions==
'''Note:''' Characters whose names are listed in ''italics'' have received rules in some form in FW's Horus Heresy releases for the 30k era.

* [[Death Guard]]
** ''[[Nathaniel Garro]]'' (became the first of the [[Knights-Errant]], first to bring word to the Imperium about the Horus Heresy)
** Andus Hakur
** Meric Voyen (former head Apothecary of 7th Great Company. Defected with Nathaniel Garro. Renounced his vows as an Astartes following 'The Flight of the Eisenstein', slain after being possessed by the Lord of the Flies)
** Huron-Fal (Venerable Dreadnought, chose to self-destruct rather than be killed on Isstvan III)
** Tollun Sendek (Slain by the Lord of the Flies on Luna)
** Ullis Temeter (Killed on Isstvan III)
** Helig Gallor (Recruited into the Knights-Errant)
** Bajun Kyda (Recruited into the Knights-Errant. Killed at Proxima Majoris)
** ''[[Crysos Morturg]]'' (Became a Blackshield during the Battle of Isstvan III, survived and was rescued by Calleb Decima. He ended up surviving the entire Heresy and became Captain of the 108th Independent Company. He and his Company were eventually sent out to monitor and patrol the Ghoul Stars. Notably, this was over fifty years after the Heresy ended, implying at least some surviving Traitor Legion loyalists were utilized by the Imperium to form "Independent Companies" instead of Chapters)
** Erud Vahn (Became a Blackshield during the Horus Heresy)
** Juball (Died on Isstvan III)
** Solun Decius (Succumbed to Nurgle's Rot, becoming the daemonic entity calling itself "The Lord of the Flies")
* [[Emperor's Children]]
** ''[[Saul Tarvitz]]'' (Called "The First Loyalist" for being the first to realize the legions betrayal and helping to send warning to the Imperium. Currently MIA. Tho the authors have stated he died during the virus bombing of Istvaan III)
** Callion Zaven (Recruited into the Knights-Errant. Killed on the 'Vengeful Spirit')
** Argentus Kiron (Member of the Outcast Dead, slain on Terra)
** ''[[Ancient Rylanor]]'' (Contemptor Dreadnought, KIA post-Heresy, [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X2Hb4bngxJ8 nearly succeeded in killing Daemon Prince Fulgrim])
** Rakishio (KIA in Sol System by traitor White Scars who failed to infiltrate Terra)
** Solomon Demeter (Captain of 2nd Company, KIA Isstvan III)
** Lord Commander Vespasian (slain by Fulgrim)
** Lord Commander Abdemon (Member of the original 200 Emperor's Children Legion survivors prior to reuniting with Fulgrim. Presumed slain on Isstvan III by traitor Astartes)
* [[Iron Warriors]]
** Warsmith [[Barabas Dantioch]] (14th Grand Company. Defied Horus' and Perturabos' orders to betray the Emperor. Lead his garrison in the defense of the stronghold *The Schadenhold* during the the Great Siege of Lesser Damantyne. Recruited by the Ultramarines to '''FORTIFY''' [[Imperium Secundus]]. Activated the [[Pharos]] navigation/communication beacon under Guilliman's orders, unintentionally drawing the attention of the [[Tyranids]] to the Milky Way Galaxy. Sacrificed himself in a glorious battle to save the forces of [[Imperium Secundus]]. Posthumously declared a '''HERO OF THE IMPERIUM'''.)
** Iron Palatine Zygmund Tarrasch (14th Grand Company. Survived the Great Siege of Lesser Damantyne. Recruited by the Ultramarines to '''FORTIFY''' Imperium Secundus.)
** Chaplain Zhnev (14th Grand Company. Survived the Great Siege of Lesser Damantyne. Recruited by the Ultramarines to '''FORTIFY''' Imperium Secundus.)
** Sergeant Ingoldt (14th Grand Company. Survived the Great Siege of Lesser Damantyne. Recruited by the Ultramarines to '''FORTIFY''' Imperium Secundus.)
** Legionary Baubrista (14th Grand Company. Survived the Great Siege of Lesser Damantyne. Recruited by the Ultramarines to '''FORTIFY''' Imperium Secundus.)
** Legionary Toledo (14th Grand Company. Survived the Great Siege of Lesser Damantyne. Recruited by the Ultramarines to '''FORTIFY''' Imperium Secundus.)
** Venerable Vastopol (14th Grand Company. Venerable Dreadnought. Died at the end of the Great Siege of Lesser Damantyne)
** Ancient Khragan (14th Grand Company. Contemptor Dreadnought. Thought lost with dozens of others in a battle against the Hrud during the Great Crusade. Reappeared along with those dozens of others in a Loyalist Shattered Legion formation during the Constantinum Incursions of the Horus Heresy. Personally killed the traitors' leader.)
** Warsmith Kyr Vhalen (77th Grand Battalion. Led 2,800 loyalist Iron Warriors during the First Battle of Paramar. Survived. Never stopped cussing the traitor.)
** Legionary Zhinnon (77th Grand Battalion, 5th Counter-Armour Wing, 30th Squad. Fought for the Loyalists in the First Battle of Paramar. Survived)
** Consul-Praevian Nârik Dreygur (114th Grand Battalion. Initially allied with the Traitors, he eventually defected to the side of Cassian Dracos of the [[Salamanders (Chapter)|Salamanders]]. Led his Iron Warriors in a successful retaking of the planet of Mezoa from traitorous Alpha Legion forces.)
** Ancient Orgol (114th Grand Battalion. Deredeo Dreadnought. Answered Nârik Dreygur's call to arms to attack traitorous Alpha Legion.)
** Warsmith Auric Saxton (Remained fiercely loyal to the Emperor and killed the Lord Commander of the traitorous Emperor's Children during the Battle of the Harrow Ravening).
** Warsmith Annovuldi (Remained fiercely loyal to the Emperor and allied with the Raven Guard and helped take the planet Carandiru from the Traitor forces. Was later sent to Terra by Corvus Corax.)
** Tubal Cayne (A member of the Crusader Host. Recruited into the Knights-Errant. Killed while infiltrating the '[[Vengeful Spirit]]' during the Battle of Molech.)
* [[Luna Wolves]]
** ''[[Garviel Loken]]'' (Survived the battle of Isstvan III, recruited into the Knights-Errant, rules are for Luna Wolf version only.)
** [[Tarik Torgaddon]] (Killed on Isstvan III by Horus Aximand.)
** [[Iacton Qruze]] (Recruited into the Knights-Errant, later killed by Horus at Molech.)
** Severian (Recruited into the Knights-Errant. Eventually became Iapto, one of the founding Grey Knights.)
** [[Nero Vipus]] (Killed on Isstvan III)
** Vaddon (Killed on Isstvan III)
** Unnamed Pre-Heresy Era Luna Wolf discovered in stasis on a [[Space Hulk]] and revived by the Flesh Tearers in M38 (Went berserk after getting an update on what happened before “borrowing” a warp jump capable vessel. Apparently now on a mission to personally put a boot in the ass of every traitorous Son of Horus he can find).
* [[World Eaters]]
** [[Macer Varren]] (Recruited into the Knights-Errant, killed on Terra by the Lord of Flies during the Battle of White Mountain)
** ''Endryd Haar'' (Became a Blackshield during the Horus Heresy, died fighting Abaddon at the Siege of Terra)
** Tagore (Member of the Outcast Dead, slain on Terra)
** Subha (Member of the Outcast Dead, slain on Terra)
** Asubha (Member of the Outcast Dead, slain on Terra)
** Skraal (Fought with Word Bearers to weaken their forces during the battle of Calth, slain on the Furious Abyss)
** Ehrlen (Killed on Isstvan III)
** Shabran Darr (Killed on Isstvan III)
** Karnaugar (Killed by his gene-father on Isstvan III with Angron staying at his side as he died out of respect for giving Angron a wound that nearly killed him)
** Juljak Nul "The Storm Walker" (killed on Isstvan III during a battle between the loyalist and traitor World Eaters, though not before killing several of the traitors.)
* [[Thousand Sons]]
** Atharva (Executed by Dorn on Terra, though either he or his shade appeared to Magnus after his defeat against Russ)
** Revuel Arvida (Fused with a fragment of Magnus and took the name Ianius, later the first Supreme Grand Master of the [[Grey Knights]])
** Omari Anat (captured by the [[Flesh Tearers]], stayed their captive to test whether or not [[Nassir Amit]] would go insane and kill him despite ample evidence of his innocence, fate unknown)
** Mhotep (Fought with Word Bearers/Chaos to weaken their forces during the battle of Calth, slain on the Furious Abyss)
** Izzakar Orr (part of the original defense of Prosporo, he was slain by the Space Wolves in a warp maze. His soul later helped the Space Wolves in M42 find the maze and rescue 200 Space Wolves who had been trapped since the Burning of Prosporo. After reuniting and resurrecting his body, he learned that the attack on Prospero had been ordered by the traitorous Warmaster [[Horus Lupercal]] and not [[Emperor|the Emperor of Mankind]]. He later closed the warp gate to the maze in order to prevent Magnus the Red from following the Space Wolves).
** Phosis T'Kar (part of the original defense of Prospero. Came to his senses and realized he had been warp corrupted during the battle. He then immediately stopped fighting, to allow Constantin Valdor to execute him, rather than continue falling to warp mutations/corruption).
* [[Night Lords]]
** Fel Zharost (Former Chief Librarian sent into exile, Recruited into the Knights-Errant. Possibly became Khyron, one of the founding Grey Knights)
** Kasati Nuon (Aided the Raven Guard in their guerilla war against the Traitor Legions)
** Vilnius Malik (Abandoned the Night Lords after becoming disgusted with what they had become. Joined up with the loyalist [[Alpha Legion]] warband The REDACTED.)
* [[Word Bearers]]
**Kaspian Hecht/Barthusa Narek (Initially drawn to the Knights-Errant. Went rogue and independent of all other factions. Helped Eldrad kill off the Cabal before returning to the Word Bearers secretly with plans to assassinate Lorgar with the Fulgurite leftover from the attempted assassination on Vulkan. Final fate unknown.)
**Volkhar Wreth (Member of the Crusader Host. Mortally wounded and forcibly bonded with a Daemon on Terra)
**[[The Anchorite]] (Disillusioned Astartes who surrendered on Calth and was spared by Guilliman. Entered contemplation while detained and re-embraced the [[Imperial Cult|Lectitio Divinitatus]]; which he had memorized in his youth. Interred in an Contemptor Dreadnought after attempted suicide and secretly taught the contents of the book to a selected few in the Imperial Cult's Ecclesiarchy on Almace. Existence revealed during the [[Indomitus Crusade]] and somehow manifests powers of a Living Saint.)
* [[Alpha Legion]]
** Legate Chaitan (Leader of a small fleet of loyalist Alpha Legion vessels. KIA alongside his crew and fleet on the strike cruiser ''Sigma'' by Alpharius's manipulation of the ''Sisypheum'''s crew while the Primarch was disguised as [[Shadrak Meduson]])
** Occam the Untrue (Leader of the REDACTED warband. Considers his legion a [[Cypher|tool to test the Imperium]]. Currently interrogating a Deceiver shard bound in a Tesseract Labyrinth after a very costly battle in M42)

==List of suspected chapters==
*'''[[Grey Knights]]''' (Founders were initially drawn from the [[Knights-Errant]]) - Outright stated, although only from their history. While several Astartes from Traitor Legions were among the founders of the Grey Knights, the Grey Knights believe their gene-seed is derived from the prime template of the Emperor, though whether that's true is a point of contention among the fanbase (despite it being repeatedly and clearly stated in any and all Grey Knight's fluff, it's still unclear just HOW Big E made it).
*'''[[Exorcists]]''' (Successors of the [[Grey Knights]]...alternatively [[Word Bearers]]) - Confirmed by extension from the Grey Knights. Alternatively, the link to the Grey Knights is only due to a small mention by an Inquisitor....and the Grey Knights are notoriously against ANYONE messing with their gene-seed. However, their Chapter colors, scripture written on their armour, specializing in getting possessed by daemons (the Exorcists then banish the daemons from their bodies) are almost 1 to 1 with Heresy-era Word Bearers.
*'''[[Shadow Wolves]]''' ([[Luna Wolves]]) - All but confirmed. Despite not being Space Wolves successors (being listed as Imperial Fists), they use tons of Wolfish iconography [[Bjorn the Fell Handed#Stormfangs|(no, not '''that''' kind)]]. Author/creator of the chapter (ADB) confirms they were created to represent the concept of loyalist Luna Wolves as a tribute to his wife Katie (who is a fan of the Luna Wolves).
*'''[[Blood Ravens]]''' ([[Thousand Sons]]) - All but confirmed. Links to the Thousand Sons Corvidae Cult, high number and heavy usage of Librarians (especially to look into the future to scry enemy's plans like the Corvidae Cult), similar color scheme to Pre-Heresy Thousand Sons, similarly have an extreme thirst for knowledge. The only known copies of their lineage are currently sealed under the orders of the Ordo Malleus. Just prior to the Fall of Prospero, a psyker named Kallista Eris foresaw the future of the Thousand Sons Corvidae Cult, during which she all but states they will become the Blood Ravens: "The Ravens. I see them too. The lost sons and a Raven of Blood. They cry out for salvation and knowledge, but it is denied!”
*'''[[Brotherhood of a Thousand]]''' ([[Thousand Sons]]) - Speculated. Minor Chapter with a tiny footnote implying heavy librarius and have a similar name. Use an "M" as their Chapter symbol, similarly to the heraldry of the Great Crusade-era Thousand Sons.
*'''[[Minotaurs]]''':
**(Old Lore) ([[World Eaters]]) - Speculated. Similar battle doctrine, known for being complete berzerkers in battle.
**(Revamped Lore) ([[Iron Warriors]]) - All but confirmed. They maintain a similar battle doctrine that favours close combat but is now also focused on pragmatic, siege, and attrition warfare tactics (their special rule is a near exact match for the Horus Heresy Iron Warrior's signature special rules). Their Ancient Greek theme also matches up with the Iron Warriors, and their gene-seed is mentioned to have extremely high assimilation rates, just like the IVth Legion of old. They even have records of action dating back to M32. Edwin Brown, a playtester for the Badab War books, has also stated that the Minotaurs use Iron Warrior gene-seed. Of note: the lore alludes to the possibility of there having been another Chapter called the "Minotaurs" more similar to the old lore descriptions, being part of the [[21st Founding|21st Cursed Founding]] of M36, and references to chimeric gene-seed, adding to the the confusion of it all. Presumably, the old lore Chapter had chimeric World Eater/someone else geneseed and their creation/extinction was to secretly legitimize the "original" Iron Warrior Minotaurs under the direct command of the [[High Lords of Terra]]. One of the Badab War writers said that they were loyalist Iron Warriors rediscovered during the Great Scouring in a distant garrison who hadn't received the news of the Heresy at all. They were allowed to remain under a short leash by the High Lords. Again presumably, the Cursed Founding World Eater/someone else chimera Minotaurs being destroyed in a sufficiently deniable fashion allowed the High Lords to get this secret unit formalised.
*'''[[Silver Skulls]]''' ([[Iron Warriors]]) - All but confirmed. Suspected to be from the gene-seed of the loyalist Iron Warriors, led by [[Barabas Dantioch]], who helped defend Ultramar. The Silver Skulls are well known for siege warfare (including a rank called "Siege Captain"), masters of building fortifications (their fortress monastery is said to have impressed Rogal Dorn himself), and their Chapter iconography/colors are near identical to pre-Heresy Iron Warriors. Their Chapter records are stated as "lost" so they do not officially know which legion they are founded from, despite being Second Founding. Their gene-seed records on Terra are also locked away beyond even Inquisitional authority. The author of the Silver Skulls series has said they are successors founded from Dantioch's garrison, and were adopted by the Ultramarines (thus making them a case of the ''Ultramarines Connection''). She has also said that their religious aspects are just due to the culture they are recruited from, and Silver Skulls from outside their main recruitment world find these traditions strange and backwards as well.
*'''[[Marines Malevolent]]''' ([[Iron Warriors]]) - Speculated. Very similar behaviors to Iron Warriors, some similar iconography. Extremely pragmatic, consider one another disposable, complete disregard for causalities or collateral damage, an extreme disdain for weakness, a tendency to challenge other Chapters, and they are pretty entitled little bastards. Like the Minotaurs, they take the wargear of defeated Astartes foes as trophies. They basically are the Minotaurs, if the Minotaurs DIDN'T have the backing of the High Lords. Their veteran's markings are also identical to the Iron Warrior's signature yellow/black hazard stripes.
*'''[[Necropolis Hawks]]''' ([[Iron Warriors]]) - Speculated, officially listed as [[Raven Guard]] successors. Similar behaviors to the [[Iron Warriors]], particularly pragmatic, calculating, unrelenting, brutal, and a preference for close quarters combat. Unlike most supposed Raven Guard successors, they do not specialize in stealth, ambush, or guerrilla tactics (or really use them at all). Instead they specialize in urban warfare/city assault (as in siege warfare, once the walls are breached). tl;dr - They act nothing like their supposed progenitors, but a LOT like [[Iron Warriors]]. Not like Cawl hasn't made [[Sons of the Phoenix|other Primaris chapters]] from Traitor Legion gene stocks.
*'''[[Iron Fists]]''' ([[Iron Warriors]]) - Suspected. Only rumored to be Iron Hands successors, but colors similar to Iron Warriors. They also share their name with a known Iron Warriors warband.
*'''[[Death Eagles]]''' ([[Emperor's Children]]) - All but confirmed (origin suspected due to records of a Loyalist Blackshield warband from the Emperor's Children's Death Eagles company during the Horus Heresy) while the Chapter's recorded actions stretch back as far as M32.
*'''[[Red Scorpions]]''' ([[Emperor's Children]]) - Speculated. Have an obsession with the "perfection" of their gene-seed, to the point of being outright hostile to any they see as "imperfect". Said geneseed also happens to have a mutation rate inferior to even that of the Ultramarines and Dark Angels (purest among the loyalist legions), but the Scorpions refuse to surrender any samples to the Inquisition. There is also the fact that their armories are stacked with old-patterns of tech, such as Deimos-pattern predators, Proteus-pattern Land Raiders, and MKIV dreadnoughts; which unlike the Minotaurs, cannot be explained by High Lords favoritism. Unlike the Death Eagles or Carcharadons though, there are no records of them existing as a Blackshield force during the Heresy. The Chapter only enters Imperial records for the first time until M34, well after [[Black Templars|The Howling]], and the 4th [[Black Crusade]].
*'''[[Sons of the Phoenix]]''' ([[Emperor's Children]]) - All but confirmed (it's practically confirmed that [[Belisarius Cawl|Papa Cawl]] got a hold of uncorrupted III Legion gene-seed). Similar iconography. Their name also possibly references Fulgrim, who was known as the Palatine Phoenix. Known for liking to put on a show when in combat. Causing as much flash and boom as they can, like a rock star concert. The even have groupies.
*'''[[Carcharadons]]''' ([[Night Lords]]) - Speculated. Possible chimeric gene-seed. Most similar beliefs and battle doctrine to Night Lords. Often have a black and white morality. Focus on shock and fear tactics combined with stealth. Preferred tactic is to brutally and horrifically annihilate the target population (be they enemy or civilian), but leave a few survivors to go tell everyone else about what happened. Physical traits (black eyes, pale skin) similar to both Night Lords and Raven Guard. Dagger-like teeth similar to Kurze's own. Mental mutations and unstable sanity similar to Night Lords. Similarly to Night Lords, the Carcharadons recruit from criminal populations. Their newest lore hints at them being at least one part [[Raven Guard]] successors; specifically the [[Ashen Claws]]: a [[blackshield]] warband that was heavily involved in the fights across the [[Nostramo]] sector during the Heresy, as the Carcharadons share the title for their leader: "Shade Lord". However, the Ashen Claws warband still exists as of [[M41]]. Notably, said Ashen Claws have called the Carcharadons "mongrels" aka "mixed breeds", hinting at either Chimeric gene-seed, or possibly that the Carcharadons use both Raven Guard and Night Lords gene-seed lines in parallel.
*'''[[Raptors (Chapter)]]''' ([[Night Lords]]) - Speculated, only rumored to be [[Raven Guard]]. Gene-seed more similar to Night Lords. While they suffer the pale skin/black eyes seen in both Raven Guard and Night Lords, unlike the Raven Guard but just like the Night Lords, they have fully functional Betcher's Glands. Their homeworld is near the Eye of Terror, but despite being a well known and active Chapter, their homeworld's name has been "lost", so no one knows what or where it is. The Chapter once blockaded a system, with the entire system's population vanishing. Anyone who attempted to investigate, even members of the Inquisition, also disappeared without a trace. While the Chapter shares it's name with Corvus Corax's attempt at making a [[Primaris Space Marines|Space Marine 2.0]], said attempt ended in complete [[fail|failure]] thanks to [[Alpha Legion]] [[Just As Planned|sabotage]], the mutated products of the program were all killed in battle. However, they also partially share the name with the Night Lords' "Night Raptors" formation....
*'''[[Storm Wardens]]''' ([[World Eaters]]) - Speculated. Similar preferred battle doctrine and color scheme to pre-Heresy War Hounds (armored assaults combined with close-combat infantry, blue armor with white pauldrons). Records of their origins have been deliberately lost or destroyed. Additionally their homeworld is sanctioned against contacting the rest of the Imperium.
*'''[[Executioners]] & Successors''' ([[World Eaters]]) - Speculated. Similar battle doctrine. Highly similar Chapter culture and behaviors. Iconography made of images minorly associated with the World Eaters (red, axes). Two of their three successor Chapters' names invoke more Khornite associations (Crimson Axes and Skull Bearers). Known for having some of the most brutal close combat methods, even for Astartes. A liking for decorating their armour with the flayed skin of their victims. Lineage questioned by other Imperial Fists successors due to lacking traits associated with the sons of Dorn. Known to be reclusive, only closely associating with their own successor Chapters. This [[Black Templars|isn't exactly unique]] among Imperial Fist successors however, and the HH black books and novels all but state that their unique culture is due to their origins in the VIIth legion's [[Breacher Siege Squad|specialist formations]].
*'''[[Fire Angels]]''' ([[Word Bearers]]) - Speculated. Highly similar behaviors and doctrine. Strict following of whatever rules they are given? Check, they follow the Codex to the letter. Highly Religious? Double check, they make the Black Templars seem like choir boys in their levels of religious zeal. Don't like Guilliman? Check. Their armour colors are even the same as the Word Bearers, just reversed (what the Word Bearers paint red, the Fire Angels paint silver. What the Word Bearers paint silver, they paint red). The combination of all of these traits, along with their Chapter colors) makes them essentially loyalist Word Bearers in all but name, but that's as far as the similarities go. However, they aren't the only highly religious Astartes Chapter, nor are they the only Chapter to adhere so strictly to the Codex (especially among Ultramarines), or the only "Ultramarines" successors to not like Guilliman (see the Mortifactors below). Much like the Executioners, there isn't any evidence hinting that their behavior is the result of genetics and not the cultural changes undergone by the Imperium in 10 000 years, especially considering that they are a Chapter that wasn't founded until very recently. However, much like the Minotaurs, there are noted records hinting that [[Sable Swords|theirs is not the first incarnation]] of the Fire Angels Chapter.
*'''[[Covenant of Fire]]''' ([[Word Bearers]]) - All but confirmed. While officially listed as "Salamanders", the Covenant of Fire are blatently Word Bearers who simply follow the Promethean Cult. Their color scheme and iconography are a near identical match to pre-heresy Word Bearers, and their attitudes and behaviors are a near 1-1 for pre-Heresy Word Bearers. Seems Cawl is getting more and more blatent in using traitor legion geneseed.
*'''[[Sons of Antaeus]]''' ([[Death Guard]]) - Speculated. Similar genetic traits included an unnatural hardy stock.
*'''[[Mortifactors]]''' ([[Death Guard]]) - Speculated. Similar color scheme and iconography to pre-Heresy Death Guard, specialize in night fighting like the Dusk Raiders, similar grim attitude, and have a preference for using Power Scythes (the signature weapon of the Death Guard). This Chapter is also obsessed with death, I mean really obsessed with it. Like the [[Fire Angels]], these guys really do not like their "official" Primarch. Being a [[Second Founding]] Chapter, they could be a prime example of the ''Ultramarine Connection''.
*'''[[Iron Snakes]]''' ([[Alpha Legion]]) - Speculated, officially from [[Ultramarine]] stock. Use combat doctrines and show behaviors extremely similar to the [[Alpha Legion]]. Similar iconography (a single-headed snake instead of a three-headed hydra). The Iron Snakes also have unusually specific design similarities to said [[Alpha Legion]]. Such as their Chapter Master being [[Primarch|taller than usual for an Astartes]], [[Alpharius|conceals his face]], and has been known to [[Omegon|swap identities]]. They also separate their Chapter into independent cells, just like Alpha Legion harrows. Due to being [[Second Founding]], they are also likely an example of the ''Ultramarines Connection''.
*'''[[Angry Marines]]''' ([[World Eaters]]) - They can say whatever they want about [[Rachnus Rageous|who they think their Primarch is]], but the Inquisition still suspects [[Angron]].

==The Ultramarine's Second Founding Connection==
The [[Ultramarines]] are confirmed to have harboured loyalist members of Traitor Legions after the Heresy, rebranding them as their own to obfuscate the newcomer's past (as for why they would do such a thing, [[Roboute Guilliman]] himself is characterized as someone who abhorred the waste of any human life (Astartes or otherwise)). Guilliman also needed all the manpower he could get when he thought the rest of the Imperium was destroyed during the era of [[Imperium Secundus]], so giving even legionnaires from suspect sources a chance to prove themselves was a practical solution, for which in the end he was not disappointed. The penning of the Codex Astartes and the shattering of the Legions into individual Chapters would also have provided the perfect opportunity to separate the loyalist Traitor Legion elements back into separate formations (both to work more as they were intended, and to make it easier to exterminate any of them that decided to betray the Imperium at a later time). Furthermore, it is confirmed that after '''[REDACTED]''' that led to the deaths of the Missing Primarchs happened, the Astartes of the II and XI Legions were mind-wiped by Malcador the Sigilite into thinking they had always been part of the Ultramarines and Imperial Fists, as to not waste useful Astartes assets. This act was backed up by Dorn and Guilliman voluntarily agreeing to have their memories of what really happened suppressed beyond even a Primarch's ability to recall. Dorn would later have this mental block partially lifted, making it likely Guilliman did the same. So, the speculation regarding the [[Valedictors]] and the [[Rainbow Warriors]] being lost legion loyalists might have some truth to it after all.

Of the Chapters listed above, the Chapters that are suspected of this connection are:

*'''[[Silver Skulls]]''' - [[Iron Warriors]]
*'''[[Mortifactors]]''' - [[Death Guard]]
*'''[[Iron Snakes]]''' - [[Alpha Legion]]

[[Category:Warhammer 40,000]][[Category:Imperial]][[Category:Space Marines]][[Category: Chaos]]

==Sources==

'''Forge World Horus Heresy Rulebooks'''
*''Betrayal''
*''Retribution''

'''Horus Heresy Novels'''
*''Flight of the Eisenstein''
*''Pharos''
*''Vengeful Spirit''
*''Corax''
** ''Weregeld''

'''Other'''
*How to Paint Space Marines, pg. 86
*Apocalypse by Josh Reynolds

Triarchal Menhir

2020-10-17T22:47:24Z

2A02:1811:5180:A200:EC3D:29FD:FA1D:618: /* Crunch */

[[File:Triarchal_Menhir.jpg|130px|right|thumb|The floating wall of doom.]]
A Triarchal Menhir is a piece of [[Necron]] construct found floating around [[Szarekh|Szarekh's]] personal [[Dias of Dominion|pimp throne,]] acting as bullet shields to protect the Silent King himself. They are probably called Triarchal Menhirs due to the possible fact that these two constructs may be controlled by the Silent King's duumvirate of [[Triarch|Triarchs]]: Hapthatra and Mesophet. A Menhir is a man-made upright stone, typically dating from the European middle Bronze Age acting as their version of monoliths.

Despite looking like a giant floating wall, the Menhirs are actually armed with a weapon. These [[Annihilator Beam|Annihilator Beams]] melts right through armour and hits like a freight train. Although they aren't ''that'' tough for a Necron construct, due to their nature as bullet shields, they would grow to become an extremely annoying [[Bitch]] to fight.

==Crunch==

Triarchal Menhirs act as support vehicles for the Dais of Dominion. Because they always accompany the pimp throne, its movement speed is the same as the Dais as well as the same Toughness and Sv3+. However, due to acting more like a physical barrier, their WS remains shit at 6+ and they only have 5 Wounds and 1 Attack. Whilst this may not sound that impressive especially for a Construct, its weapon, the Annihilator Beam, is a giant FUCK OFF laser that can make superheavies feel the ''pain''.

A Heavy 1 weapon with 36" range. The [[Annihilator Beam]] is an ungodly [[Anal circumference|S12, AP-4 fuck stick that deals an automatic 6 Damage.]] Given the impressive BS of 2+ for the Menhirs, [[Powergamer|<u>'''YOU WILL BE HITTING YOUR TARGETS EVERY SINGLE TIME.'''</u>]] Moreover, there are two of these things, so you are dealing a [[Rape|''flat 12 damage each round''.]] This is without Szarekh pulling his own stunts mind you. So yeah, these things make Imperial Knights and Baneblades shit themselves. There is also the fact that they act as mobile shields, automatically giving the Dais an additional 10 more Wounds! Because fuck you that's why!

{{Necrons-Forces}}

[[Category:Skimmers]]

Traitor Legion Loyalists

2020-10-16T08:54:25Z

2A02:1811:5180:A200:EC3D:29FD:FA1D:618: /* List of suspected chapters */

{{Wh40k-stub}}
{{Spoilers}}
[[File:TOTALLY LOYAL AND NOT AT ALL HERETICAL.jpeg|500px|thumb|right|COMPLETELY 100% LOYAL.]]
{{topquote|Thou shalt not follow a multitude to do evil.|Exodus 23:2}}

'''Traitor Legion Loyalists''' are the rare few Space Marines who, despite hailing from the Traitor Legions, stayed loyal to the Emperor and the Imperium, proving that despite what some characters in 40K think, having [[geneseed]] from a suspect source is no sure indicator of bad character. They are a very rare group of individuals given the initial purges of Loyalists elements from the Traitor Legions at the [[Battle of Isstvan III]] or by internal purges such as those enacted by “The Brotherhood” in the Word Bearers. While most of the information below has just been hints for now, this is a matter that has been popping up every now and then for the last few years.

As it happens, many of these Traitor Legion Loyalists during the [[Horus Heresy]] who did not end up in the annals of history became [[Blackshield|Blackshields]], the precursor to the 40K equivalent of the same name where a Marine with no emblems or markings can petition to join with the [[Deathwatch]] on a permanent basis, no questions asked. The term "Blackshield" by itself leaves it open as to whether the individual Marine seeks to redeem himself OR his chapter if it went rogue or was destroyed. Although Blackshields are a rarity in 40K, there were enough in 30K for such a tradition to begin and survive to the present day in the Imperium.

Those groups with enough numbers, or perhaps ties to the right people, were able to pass themselves off as successors of other Chapters after the [[Second Founding]]. [[Blood Ravens|Or their founders purged and changed their own records, so that over time, no one within the Chapter knows who their true progenitor is ]](which can lead to some [[skub|fun times]] when an Inquisitor comes across evidence that it occurred).

Generic armies of them can be fielded in 30K with the Orphans of Betrayal [[Warhammer_40,000/Tactics/Space_Marine_Legion_List_(30k)#Rites_of_War|Rite of War]]. As is fitting for a rogue, largely unsupported force, the rite doesn't provide many bonuses unless you're fighting Traitor versions of the same Legion you're fielding.

==Known Loyalist Members of the Traitor Legions==
'''Note:''' Characters whose names are listed in ''italics'' have received rules in some form in FW's Horus Heresy releases for the 30k era.

* [[Death Guard]]
** ''[[Nathaniel Garro]]'' (became the first of the [[Knights-Errant]], first to bring word to the Imperium about the Horus Heresy)
** Andus Hakur
** Meric Voyen (former head Apothecary of 7th Great Company. Defected with Nathaniel Garro. Renounced his vows as an Astartes following 'The Flight of the Eisenstein', slain after being possessed by the Lord of the Flies)
** Huron-Fal (Venerable Dreadnought, chose to self-destruct rather than be killed on Isstvan III)
** Tollun Sendek (Slain by the Lord of the Flies on Luna)
** Ullis Temeter (Killed on Isstvan III)
** Helig Gallor (Recruited into the Knights-Errant)
** Bajun Kyda (Recruited into the Knights-Errant. Killed at Proxima Majoris)
** ''Crysos Morturg'' (Became a Blackshield during the Battle of Isstvan III, survived and was rescued by Calleb Decima. He ended up surviving the entire Heresy and became Captain of the 108th Independent Company. He and his Company were eventually sent out to monitor and patrol the Ghoul Stars. Notably, this was over fifty years after the Heresy ended, implying at least some surviving Traitor Legion loyalists were utilized by the Imperium to form "Independent Companies" instead of Chapters)
** Erud Vahn (Became a Blackshield during the Horus Heresy)
** Juball (Died on Isstvan III)
** Solun Decius (Succumbed to Nurgle's Rot, becoming the daemonic entity calling itself "The Lord of the Flies")
* [[Emperor's Children]]
** ''[[Saul Tarvitz]]'' (Called "The First Loyalist" for being the first to realize the legions betrayal and helping to send warning to the Imperium. Currently MIA. Tho the authors have stated he died during the virus bombing of Istvaan III)
** Callion Zaven (Recruited into the Knights-Errant. Killed on the 'Vengeful Spirit')
** Argentus Kiron (Member of the Outcast Dead, slain on Terra)
** ''Ancient Rylanor'' (Contemptor Dreadnought, KIA post-Heresy, [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X2Hb4bngxJ8 nearly succeeded in killing Daemon Prince Fulgrim])
** Rakishio (KIA in Sol System by traitor White Scars who failed to infiltrate Terra)
** Solomon Demeter (Captain of 2nd Company, KIA Isstvan III)
** Lord Commander Vespasian (slain by Fulgrim)
** Lord Commander Abdemon (Member of the original 200 Emperor's Children Legion survivors prior to reuniting with Fulgrim. Presumed slain on Isstvan III by traitor Astartes)
* [[Iron Warriors]]
** Warsmith [[Barabas Dantioch]] (14th Grand Company. Defied Horus' and Perturabos' orders to betray the Emperor. Lead his garrison in the defense of the stronghold *The Schadenhold* during the the Great Siege of Lesser Damantyne. Recruited by the Ultramarines to '''FORTIFY''' [[Imperium Secundus]]. Activated the [[Pharos]] navigation/communication beacon under Guilliman's orders, unintentionally drawing the attention of the [[Tyranids]] to the Milky Way Galaxy. Sacrificed himself in a glorious battle to save the forces of [[Imperium Secundus]]. Posthumously declared a '''HERO OF THE IMPERIUM'''.)
** Iron Palatine Zygmund Tarrasch (14th Grand Company. Survived the Great Siege of Lesser Damantyne. Recruited by the Ultramarines to '''FORTIFY''' Imperium Secundus.)
** Chaplain Zhnev (14th Grand Company. Survived the Great Siege of Lesser Damantyne. Recruited by the Ultramarines to '''FORTIFY''' Imperium Secundus.)
** Sergeant Ingoldt (14th Grand Company. Survived the Great Siege of Lesser Damantyne. Recruited by the Ultramarines to '''FORTIFY''' Imperium Secundus.)
** Legionary Baubrista (14th Grand Company. Survived the Great Siege of Lesser Damantyne. Recruited by the Ultramarines to '''FORTIFY''' Imperium Secundus.)
** Legionary Toledo (14th Grand Company. Survived the Great Siege of Lesser Damantyne. Recruited by the Ultramarines to '''FORTIFY''' Imperium Secundus.)
** Venerable Vastopol (14th Grand Company. Venerable Dreadnought. Died at the end of the Great Siege of Lesser Damantyne)
** Ancient Khragan (14th Grand Company. Contemptor Dreadnought. Thought lost with dozens of others in a battle against the Hrud during the Great Crusade. Reappeared along with those dozens of others in a Loyalist Shattered Legion formation during the Constantinum Incursions of the Horus Heresy. Personally killed the traitors' leader.)
** Warsmith Kyr Vhalen (77th Grand Battalion. Led 2,800 loyalist Iron Warriors during the First Battle of Paramar. Survived. Never stopped cussing the traitor.)
** Legionary Zhinnon (77th Grand Battalion, 5th Counter-Armour Wing, 30th Squad. Fought for the Loyalists in the First Battle of Paramar. Survived)
** Consul-Praevian Nârik Dreygur (114th Grand Battalion. Initially allied with the Traitors, he eventually defected to the side of Cassian Dracos of the [[Salamanders (Chapter)|Salamanders]]. Led his Iron Warriors in a successful retaking of the planet of Mezoa from traitorous Alpha Legion forces.)
** Ancient Orgol (114th Grand Battalion. Deredeo Dreadnought. Answered Nârik Dreygur's call to arms to attack traitorous Alpha Legion.)
** Warsmith Auric Saxton (Remained fiercely loyal to the Emperor and killed the Lord Commander of the traitorous Emperor's Children during the Battle of the Harrow Ravening).
** Warsmith Annovuldi (Remained fiercely loyal to the Emperor and allied with the Raven Guard and helped take the planet Carandiru from the Traitor forces. Was later sent to Terra by Corvus Corax.)
** Tubal Cayne (A member of the Crusader Host. Recruited into the Knights-Errant. Killed while infiltrating the '[[Vengeful Spirit]]' during the Battle of Molech.)
* [[Luna Wolves]]
** ''[[Garviel Loken]]'' (Survived the battle of Isstvan III, recruited into the Knights-Errant, rules are for Luna Wolf version only.)
** [[Tarik Torgaddon]] (Killed on Isstvan III by Horus Aximand.)
** [[Iacton Qruze]] (Recruited into the Knights-Errant, later killed by Horus at Molech.)
** Severian (Recruited into the Knights-Errant. Eventually became Iapto, one of the founding Grey Knights.)
** [[Nero Vipus]] (Killed on Isstvan III)
** Vaddon (Killed on Isstvan III)
** Unnamed Pre-Heresy Era Luna Wolf discovered in stasis on a [[Space Hulk]] and revived by the Flesh Tearers in M38 (Went berserk after getting an update on what happened before “borrowing” a warp jump capable vessel. Apparently now on a mission to personally put a boot in the ass of every traitorous Son of Horus he can find).
* [[World Eaters]]
** [[Macer Varren]] (Recruited into the Knights-Errant, killed on Terra by the Lord of Flies during the Battle of White Mountain)
** ''Endryd Haar'' (Became a Blackshield during the Horus Heresy, died fighting Abaddon at the Siege of Terra)
** Tagore (Member of the Outcast Dead, slain on Terra)
** Subha (Member of the Outcast Dead, slain on Terra)
** Asubha (Member of the Outcast Dead, slain on Terra)
** Skraal (Fought with Word Bearers to weaken their forces during the battle of Calth, slain on the Furious Abyss)
** Ehrlen (Killed on Isstvan III)
** Shabran Darr (Killed on Isstvan III)
** Karnaugar (Killed by his gene-father on Isstvan III with Angron staying at his side as he died out of respect for giving Angron a wound that nearly killed him)
** Juljak Nul "The Storm Walker" (killed on Isstvan III during a battle between the loyalist and traitor World Eaters, though not before killing several of the traitors.)
* [[Thousand Sons]]
** Atharva (Executed by Dorn on Terra, though either he or his shade appeared to Magnus after his defeat against Russ)
** Revuel Arvida (Fused with a fragment of Magnus and took the name Ianius, later the first Supreme Grand Master of the [[Grey Knights]])
** Omari Anat (captured by the [[Flesh Tearers]], stayed their captive to test whether or not [[Nassir Amit]] would go insane and kill him despite ample evidence of his innocence, fate unknown)
** Mhotep (Fought with Word Bearers/Chaos to weaken their forces during the battle of Calth, slain on the Furious Abyss)
** Izzakar Orr (part of the original defense of Prosporo, he was slain by the Space Wolves in a warp maze. His soul later helped the Space Wolves in M42 find the maze and rescue 200 Space Wolves who had been trapped since the Burning of Prosporo. After reuniting and resurrecting his body, he learned that the attack on Prospero had been ordered by the traitorous Warmaster [[Horus Lupercal]] and not [[Emperor|the Emperor of Mankind]]. He later closed the warp gate to the maze in order to prevent Magnus the Red from following the Space Wolves).
** Phosis T'Kar (part of the original defense of Prospero. Came to his senses and realized he had been warp corrupted during the battle. He then immediately stopped fighting, to allow Constantin Valdor to execute him, rather than continue falling to warp mutations/corruption).
* [[Night Lords]]
** Fel Zharost (Former Chief Librarian sent into exile, Recruited into the Knights-Errant. Possibly became Khyron, one of the founding Grey Knights)
** Kasati Nuon (Aided the Raven Guard in their guerilla war against the Traitor Legions)
** Vilnius Malik (Abandoned the Night Lords after becoming disgusted with what they had become. Joined up with the loyalist [[Alpha Legion]] warband The REDACTED.)
* [[Word Bearers]]
**Kaspian Hecht/Barthusa Narek (Initially drawn to the Knights-Errant. Went rogue and independent of all other factions. Helped Eldrad kill off the Cabal before returning to the Word Bearers secretly with plans to assassinate Lorgar with the Fulgurite leftover from the attempted assassination on Vulkan. Final fate unknown.)
**Volkhar Wreth (Member of the Crusader Host. Mortally wounded and forcibly bonded with a Daemon on Terra)
**[[The Anchorite]] (Disillusioned Astartes who surrendered on Calth and was spared by Guilliman. Entered contemplation while detained and re-embraced the [[Imperial Cult|Lectitio Divinitatus]]; which he had memorized in his youth. Interred in an Contemptor Dreadnought after attempted suicide and secretly taught the contents of the book to a selected few in the Imperial Cult's Ecclesiarchy on Almace. Existence revealed during the [[Indomitus Crusade]] and somehow manifests powers of a Living Saint.)
* [[Alpha Legion]]
** Legate Chaitan (Leader of a small fleet of loyalist Alpha Legion vessels. KIA alongside his crew and fleet on the strike cruiser ''Sigma'' by Alpharius's manipulation of the ''Sisypheum'''s crew while the Primarch was disguised as [[Shadrak Meduson]])
** Occam the Untrue (Leader of the REDACTED warband. Considers his legion a [[Cypher|tool to test the Imperium]]. Currently interrogating a Deceiver shard bound in a Tesseract Labyrinth after a very costly battle in M42)

==List of suspected chapters==
*'''[[Grey Knights]]''' (Founders were initially drawn from the [[Knights-Errant]]) - Outright stated, although only from their history. While several Astartes from Traitor Legions were among the founders of the Grey Knights, the Grey Knights believe their gene-seed is derived from the prime template of the Emperor, though whether that's true is a point of contention among the fanbase (despite it being repeatedly and clearly stated in any and all Grey Knight's fluff, it's still unclear just HOW Big E made it).
*'''[[Exorcists]]''' (Successors of the [[Grey Knights]]...alternatively [[Word Bearers]]) - Confirmed by extension from the Grey Knights. Alternatively, the link to the Grey Knights is only due to a small mention by an Inquisitor....and the Grey Knights are notoriously against ANYONE messing with their gene-seed. However, their Chapter colors, scripture written on their armour, specializing in getting possessed by daemons (the Exorcists then banish the daemons from their bodies) are almost 1 to 1 with Heresy-era Word Bearers.
*'''[[Shadow Wolves]]''' ([[Luna Wolves]]) - All but confirmed. Despite not being Space Wolves successors (being listed as Imperial Fists), they use tons of Wolfish iconography [[Bjorn the Fell Handed#Stormfangs|(no, not '''that''' kind)]]. Author/creator of the chapter (ADB) confirms they were created to represent the concept of loyalist Luna Wolves as a tribute to his wife Katie (who is a fan of the Luna Wolves).
*'''[[Blood Ravens]]''' ([[Thousand Sons]]) - All but confirmed. Links to the Thousand Sons Corvidae Cult, high number and heavy usage of Librarians (especially to look into the future to scry enemy's plans like the Corvidae Cult), similar color scheme to Pre-Heresy Thousand Sons, similarly have an extreme thirst for knowledge. The only known copies of their lineage are currently sealed under the orders of the Ordo Malleus. Just prior to the Fall of Prospero, a psyker named Kallista Eris foresaw the future of the Thousand Sons Corvidae Cult, during which she all but states they will become the Blood Ravens: "The Ravens. I see them too. The lost sons and a Raven of Blood. They cry out for salvation and knowledge, but it is denied!”
*'''[[Brotherhood of a Thousand]]''' ([[Thousand Sons]]) - Speculated. Minor Chapter with a tiny footnote implying heavy librarius and have a similar name. Use an "M" as their Chapter symbol, similarly to the heraldry of the Great Crusade-era Thousand Sons.
*'''[[Minotaurs]]''':
**(Old Lore) ([[World Eaters]]) - Speculated. Similar battle doctrine, known for being complete berzerkers in battle.
**(Revamped Lore) ([[Iron Warriors]]) - All but confirmed. They maintain a similar battle doctrine that favours close combat but is now also focused on pragmatic, siege, and attrition warfare tactics (their special rule is a near exact match for the Horus Heresy Iron Warrior's signature special rules). Their Ancient Greek theme also matches up with the Iron Warriors, and their gene-seed is mentioned to have extremely high assimilation rates, just like the IVth Legion of old. They even have records of action dating back to M32. Edwin Brown, a playtester for the Badab War books, has also stated that the Minotaurs use Iron Warrior gene-seed. Of note: the lore alludes to the possibility of there having been another Chapter called the "Minotaurs" more similar to the old lore descriptions, being part of the [[21st Founding|21st Cursed Founding]] of M36, and references to chimeric gene-seed, adding to the the confusion of it all. Presumably, the old lore Chapter had chimeric World Eater/someone else geneseed and their creation/extinction was to secretly legitimize the "original" Iron Warrior Minotaurs under the direct command of the [[High Lords of Terra]]. One of the Badab War writers said that they were loyalist Iron Warriors rediscovered during the Great Scouring in a distant garrison who hadn't received the news of the Heresy at all. They were allowed to remain under a short leash by the High Lords. Again presumably, the Cursed Founding World Eater/someone else chimera Minotaurs being destroyed in a sufficiently deniable fashion allowed the High Lords to get this secret unit formalised.
*'''[[Silver Skulls]]''' ([[Iron Warriors]]) - All but confirmed. Suspected to be from the gene-seed of the loyalist Iron Warriors, led by [[Barabas Dantioch]], who helped defend Ultramar. The Silver Skulls are well known for siege warfare (including a rank called "Siege Captain"), masters of building fortifications (their fortress monastery is said to have impressed Rogal Dorn himself), and their Chapter iconography/colors are near identical to pre-Heresy Iron Warriors. Their Chapter records are stated as "lost" so they do not officially know which legion they are founded from, despite being Second Founding. Their gene-seed records on Terra are also locked away beyond even Inquisitional authority. The author of the Silver Skulls series has said they are successors founded from Dantioch's garrison, and were adopted by the Ultramarines (thus making them a case of the ''Ultramarines Connection''). She has also said that their religious aspects are just due to the culture they are recruited from, and Silver Skulls from outside their main recruitment world find these traditions strange and backwards as well.
*'''[[Marines Malevolent]]''' ([[Iron Warriors]]) - Speculated. Very similar behaviors to Iron Warriors, some similar iconography. Extremely pragmatic, consider one another disposable, complete disregard for causalities or collateral damage, an extreme disdain for weakness, a tendency to challenge other Chapters, and they are pretty entitled little bastards. Like the Minotaurs, they take the wargear of defeated Astartes foes as trophies. They basically are the Minotaurs, if the Minotaurs DIDN'T have the backing of the High Lords. Their veteran's markings are also identical to the Iron Warrior's signature yellow/black hazard stripes.
*'''[[Necropolis Hawks]]''' ([[Iron Warriors]]) - Speculated, officially listed as [[Raven Guard]] successors. Similar behaviors to the [[Iron Warriors]], particularly pragmatic, calculating, unrelenting, brutal, and a preference for close quarters combat. Unlike most supposed Raven Guard successors, they do not specialize in stealth, ambush, or guerrilla tactics (or really use them at all). Instead they specialize in urban warfare/city assault (as in siege warfare, once the walls are breached). tl;dr - They act nothing like their supposed progenitors, but a LOT like [[Iron Warriors]]. Not like Cawl hasn't made [[Sons of the Phoenix|other Primaris chapters]] from Traitor Legion gene stocks.
*'''[[Iron Fists]]''' ([[Iron Warriors]]) - Suspected. Only rumored to be Iron Hands successors, but colors similar to Iron Warriors. They also share their name with a known Iron Warriors warband.
*'''[[Death Eagles]]''' ([[Emperor's Children]]) - All but confirmed (origin suspected due to records of a Loyalist Blackshield warband from the Emperor's Children's Death Eagles company during the Horus Heresy) while the Chapter's recorded actions stretch back as far as M32.
*'''[[Red Scorpions]]''' ([[Emperor's Children]]) - Speculated. Have an obsession with the "perfection" of their gene-seed, to the point of being outright hostile to any they see as "imperfect". Said geneseed also happens to have a mutation rate inferior to even that of the Ultramarines and Dark Angels (purest among the loyalist legions), but the Scorpions refuse to surrender any samples to the Inquisition. There is also the fact that their armories are stacked with old-patterns of tech, such as Deimos-pattern predators, Proteus-pattern Land Raiders, and MKIV dreadnoughts; which unlike the Minotaurs, cannot be explained by High Lords favoritism. Unlike the Death Eagles or Carcharadons though, there are no records of them existing as a Blackshield force during the Heresy. The Chapter only enters Imperial records for the first time until M34, well after [[Black Templars|The Howling]], and the 4th [[Black Crusade]].
*'''[[Sons of the Phoenix]]''' ([[Emperor's Children]]) - All but confirmed (it's practically confirmed that [[Belisarius Cawl|Papa Cawl]] got a hold of uncorrupted III Legion gene-seed). Similar iconography. Their name also possibly references Fulgrim, who was known as the Palatine Phoenix. Known for liking to put on a show when in combat. Causing as much flash and boom as they can, like a rock star concert. The even have groupies.
*'''[[Carcharadons]]''' ([[Night Lords]]) - Speculated. Possible chimeric gene-seed. Most similar beliefs and battle doctrine to Night Lords. Often have a black and white morality. Focus on shock and fear tactics combined with stealth. Preferred tactic is to brutally and horrifically annihilate the target population (be they enemy or civilian), but leave a few survivors to go tell everyone else about what happened. Physical traits (black eyes, pale skin) similar to both Night Lords and Raven Guard. Dagger-like teeth similar to Kurze's own. Mental mutations and unstable sanity similar to Night Lords. Similarly to Night Lords, the Carcharadons recruit from criminal populations. Their newest lore hints at them being at least one part [[Raven Guard]] successors; specifically the [[Ashen Claws]]: a [[blackshield]] warband that was heavily involved in the fights across the [[Nostramo]] sector during the Heresy, as the Carcharadons share the title for their leader: "Shade Lord". However, the Ashen Claws warband still exists as of [[M41]]. Notably, said Ashen Claws have called the Carcharadons "mongrels" aka "mixed breeds", hinting at either Chimeric gene-seed, or possibly that the Carcharadons use both Raven Guard and Night Lords gene-seed lines in parallel.
*'''[[Raptors (Chapter)]]''' ([[Night Lords]]) - Speculated, only rumored to be [[Raven Guard]]. Gene-seed more similar to Night Lords. While they suffer the pale skin/black eyes seen in both Raven Guard and Night Lords, unlike the Raven Guard but just like the Night Lords, they have fully functional Betcher's Glands. Their homeworld is near the Eye of Terror, but despite being a well known and active Chapter, their homeworld's name has been "lost", so no one knows what or where it is. The Chapter once blockaded a system, with the entire system's population vanishing. Anyone who attempted to investigate, even members of the Inquisition, also disappeared without a trace. While the Chapter shares it's name with Corvus Corax's attempt at making a [[Primaris Space Marines|Space Marine 2.0]], said attempt ended in complete [[fail|failure]] thanks to [[Alpha Legion]] [[Just As Planned|sabotage]], the mutated products of the program were all killed in battle. However, they also partially share the name with the Night Lords' "Night Raptors" formation....
*'''[[Storm Wardens]]''' ([[World Eaters]]) - Speculated. Similar preferred battle doctrine and color scheme to pre-Heresy War Hounds (armored assaults combined with close-combat infantry, blue armor with white pauldrons). Records of their origins have been deliberately lost or destroyed. Additionally their homeworld is sanctioned against contacting the rest of the Imperium.
*'''[[Executioners]] & Successors''' ([[World Eaters]]) - Speculated. Similar battle doctrine. Highly similar Chapter culture and behaviors. Iconography made of images minorly associated with the World Eaters (red, axes). Two of their three successor Chapters' names invoke more Khornite associations (Crimson Axes and Skull Bearers). Known for having some of the most brutal close combat methods, even for Astartes. A liking for decorating their armour with the flayed skin of their victims. Lineage questioned by other Imperial Fists successors due to lacking traits associated with the sons of Dorn. Known to be reclusive, only closely associating with their own successor Chapters. This [[Black Templars|isn't exactly unique]] among Imperial Fist successors however, and the HH black books and novels all but state that their unique culture is due to their origins in the VIIth legion's [[Breacher Siege Squad|specialist formations]].
*'''[[Fire Angels]]''' ([[Word Bearers]]) - Speculated. Highly similar behaviors and doctrine. Strict following of whatever rules they are given? Check, they follow the Codex to the letter. Highly Religious? Double check, they make the Black Templars seem like choir boys in their levels of religious zeal. Don't like Guilliman? Check. Their armour colors are even the same as the Word Bearers, just reversed (what the Word Bearers paint red, the Fire Angels paint silver. What the Word Bearers paint silver, they paint red). The combination of all of these traits, along with their Chapter colors) makes them essentially loyalist Word Bearers in all but name, but that's as far as the similarities go. However, they aren't the only highly religious Astartes Chapter, nor are they the only Chapter to adhere so strictly to the Codex (especially among Ultramarines), or the only "Ultramarines" successors to not like Guilliman (see the Mortifactors below). Much like the Executioners, there isn't any evidence hinting that their behavior is the result of genetics and not the cultural changes undergone by the Imperium in 10 000 years, especially considering that they are a Chapter that wasn't founded until very recently. However, much like the Minotaurs, there are noted records hinting that [[Sable Swords|theirs is not the first incarnation]] of the Fire Angels Chapter.
*'''[[Covenant of Fire]]''' ([[Word Bearers]]) - All but confirmed. While officially listed as "Salamanders", the Covenant of Fire are blatently Word Bearers who simply follow the Promethean Cult. Their color scheme and iconography are a near identical match to pre-heresy Word Bearers, and their attitudes and behaviors are a near 1-1 for pre-Heresy Word Bearers. Seems Cawl is getting more and more blatent in using traitor legion geneseed.
*'''[[Sons of Antaeus]]''' ([[Death Guard]]) - Speculated. Similar genetic traits included an unnatural hardy stock.
*'''[[Mortifactors]]''' ([[Death Guard]]) - Speculated. Similar color scheme and iconography to pre-Heresy Death Guard, specialize in night fighting like the Dusk Raiders, similar grim attitude, and have a preference for using Power Scythes (the signature weapon of the Death Guard). This Chapter is also obsessed with death, I mean really obsessed with it. Like the [[Fire Angels]], these guys really do not like their "official" Primarch. Being a [[Second Founding]] Chapter, they could be a prime example of the ''Ultramarine Connection''.
*'''[[Iron Snakes]]''' ([[Alpha Legion]]) - Speculated, officially from [[Ultramarine]] stock. Use combat doctrines and show behaviors extremely similar to the [[Alpha Legion]]. Similar iconography (a single-headed snake instead of a three-headed hydra). The Iron Snakes also have unusually specific design similarities to said [[Alpha Legion]]. Such as their Chapter Master being [[Primarch|taller than usual for an Astartes]], [[Alpharius|conceals his face]], and has been known to [[Omegon|swap identities]]. They also separate their Chapter into independent cells, just like Alpha Legion harrows. Due to being [[Second Founding]], they are also likely an example of the ''Ultramarines Connection''.
*'''[[Angry Marines]]''' ([[World Eaters]]) - They can say whatever they want about [[Rachnus Rageous|who they think their Primarch is]], but the Inquisition still suspects [[Angron]].

==The Ultramarine's Second Founding Connection==
The [[Ultramarines]] are confirmed to have harboured loyalist members of Traitor Legions after the Heresy, rebranding them as their own to obfuscate the newcomer's past (as for why they would do such a thing, [[Roboute Guilliman]] himself is characterized as someone who abhorred the waste of any human life (Astartes or otherwise)). Guilliman also needed all the manpower he could get when he thought the rest of the Imperium was destroyed during the era of [[Imperium Secundus]], so giving even legionnaires from suspect sources a chance to prove themselves was a practical solution, for which in the end he was not disappointed. The penning of the Codex Astartes and the shattering of the Legions into individual Chapters would also have provided the perfect opportunity to separate the loyalist Traitor Legion elements back into separate formations (both to work more as they were intended, and to make it easier to exterminate any of them that decided to betray the Imperium at a later time). Furthermore, it is confirmed that after '''[REDACTED]''' that led to the deaths of the Missing Primarchs happened, the Astartes of the II and XI Legions were mind-wiped by Malcador the Sigilite into thinking they had always been part of the Ultramarines and Imperial Fists, as to not waste useful Astartes assets. This act was backed up by Dorn and Guilliman voluntarily agreeing to have their memories of what really happened suppressed beyond even a Primarch's ability to recall. Dorn would later have this mental block partially lifted, making it likely Guilliman did the same. So, the speculation regarding the [[Valedictors]] and the [[Rainbow Warriors]] being lost legion loyalists might have some truth to it after all.

Of the Chapters listed above, the Chapters that are suspected of this connection are:

*'''[[Silver Skulls]]''' - [[Iron Warriors]]
*'''[[Mortifactors]]''' - [[Death Guard]]
*'''[[Iron Snakes]]''' - [[Alpha Legion]]

[[Category:Warhammer 40,000]][[Category:Imperial]][[Category:Space Marines]][[Category: Chaos]]

==Sources==

'''Forge World Horus Heresy Rulebooks'''
*''Betrayal''
*''Retribution''

'''Horus Heresy Novels'''
*''Flight of the Eisenstein''
*''Pharos''
*''Vengeful Spirit''
*''Corax''
** ''Weregeld''

'''Other'''
*How to Paint Space Marines, pg. 86
*Apocalypse by Josh Reynolds

Warp Weapons

2020-10-15T16:01:05Z

2A02:1811:5180:A200:EC3D:29FD:FA1D:618: /* Imperial Variants */

In [[Warhammer 40,000]], there are few things more dangerous to life in the galaxy than the [[Warp]]. Especially when it's weaponized. Some of the deadliest weapons in existence, Warp Weapons are devices capable of using the warp to deal tremendous damage to any target presented with.

==Imperial Variants==

'''Vortex Weapons''' are based on the same technology as the warp engines of a voidship: they basically tear a momentary 'hole' (aforementioned vortex) between realspace and the Warp. But where a spaceship is (hopefully) protected by a [[Gellar Field]] to survive the experience, anything that gets sucked through find itself at the [[/d/|tender (lack of) mercy]] of the [[daemon|denizens of the Warp]]. Those weapons are frighteningly effective, but they are used with circumspection. In theory, the vortex' existence is very brief. In practice, sometimes it somehow can sustain itself and it starts drifting around... Or growing... or [[demon|things]] start coming through from the other side to have some fun... [[Reasonable Marines|Which explain why Imperial forces tend to chuck those at the enemy from very far away: should there be side effects, at least the enemy will be first in line to get fucked over!]]

Imperial sanctioned weapons come in two variations: Vortex grenades that are man-portable but whose effect is limited and the Vortex Missile which is mounted on either a [[Deathstrike Missile Launcher]] or [[Reaver Battle Titan|Reaver]]/[[Warlord Battle Titan|Warlord]] Battle Titans and can hatefuck much more massive holes in reality in a single strike.

An example of a non-standard Vortex Weapon is the [[Hero of the Imperium|Dominus Astra]], an Emperor Class Battleship, which when strategically located and having its warp drive detonated was capable of destroying almost all of [[Hive Fleet Behemoth]]. Needless to say this is not something the Imperium is well equipped to do, as each Emperor-class is nigh-irreplaceable...

===Vortex Grenade===
[[File:VortexGrenade.jpg|200px|right|thumb|Vortex Grenade]]
The smallest vortex weapon and the only one that can be used by hand. The vortex grenade is a rare and deadly weapon which utilizes complex warp technology to create a vortex between real space and the warp on activation. They are very difficult to produce, with only the [[Adeptus Mechanicus]] being able to manufacture them, and are not issued to regular troops, but to important Imperial agents such as [[Inquisitors]] or [[Assassinorum|Assassins]] (Probably because they are the only ones trained enough to know ''when'' and ''where'' to toss them, in contrast to your average Joe who would treat them like a normal grenade and cause accidental friendly fire).

The Vortex Grenade takes the form of a weighty sphere, approximately the size as the fist of a grown man, consisting of an outer shell which encases a delicate and temperamental warp mechanism. The designs of the device date back to the [[Dark Age of Technology]].

When the grenade is activated, it creates a tiny rift between realspace and the warp, a rift that becomes a vortex in the very fabric of space. In appearance the vortex is a ball of glowing blackness like a small black hole. Everyone and everything encompassed by the vortex is destroyed; all matter and energy is drawn through the vortex and it is turned into the very stuff of the warp.

It is unknown how applicable they can be when fired from a regular grenade launcher.

===Rift Cannon===
[[File:Rift_Cannon.JPG|200px|right|thumb|Rift Cannon]]
The '''Rift Cannon''' or otherwise known as the Kaleidoscope Cannon or the [[Drug|LSD Cannon]] by /tg/, is used by the [[Dark Angels]] Space Marine Chapter is also a warp weapon supposedly developed in the Dark Age of Technology. When fired, a beam of warp energy emerges that resembles a kaleidoscope of colors blossoming into a small rift in the Immaterium, opening at the beam's point of contact, while those who survive the brief tear in the Materium find themselves thrown awry. The weapon is amusingly called the ''Stained Glass Cannon'' primarily due to this kaleidoscopic explosion, which means that the enemies of Man [[Gay|literally taste the motherfucking rainbow.]]

In 8th Edition, the Rift Cannon is now a Heavy D3 Strength 10 AP -3 weapon. Its Rift Vortex works way better, no longer rolling scatter doubles. Instead, the weapon causes the target to roll a D6 against the Rift Vortex chart when wounded, dealing an additional D3 Mortal Wounds if rolled. The Vortex chart actually scales with the Dark Talon's BS depending on how many wounds are left on the target, which often starts at a 3+/4+/5+ scaling. In 9th Edition, the Rift Cannon now gains an amped-up version of the Blast ability, giving it the capability to automatically have its 3 shots hit successfully if the unit targeted has 6 or more models.

===Vortex Missile===
[[image:VortexMissile.jpg|200px|right|thumb|Vortex Missile]]
If the regular nuclear warhead of a [[Missile Launcher#Deathstrike Missile|Deathstrike Missile]] won't do it for you, then sending your enemies into the hatefuck realm that is the [[Warp]], will. As previously noted, the Warp tech of the Imperium is not as sophisticated and controlled as that of the [[Eldar]]. As such, they prefer launching these Warp weapons using ''very'' long-ranged missiles in order to hit targets far enough away that Imperial forces remain unaffected.

Due to the fact that they came from the [[Dark Age of Technology]], these missiles are as rare as they are powerful, creating a miniature (and short-lived) [[Eye of Terror]] when they explode. Vortex missiles are constructed by using [[Psykers]] to channel the raw energy of the Warp into an intercontinental ballistic missile. [[Derp|How the hell that works, we have no idea.]] (To note, older fluff described the warhead as a miniaturized one-shot Warp Drive like those found on starships, which makes slightly more sense, I guess...)

Vortex missiles mounted on [[Deathstrike Missile Launcher|Deathstrike Platforms]] are so valuable that they are guarded at a minimum by an entire infantry platoon, charged with concealing the weapon from enemy saboteurs and kill-teams. Nominally only Segmentum Command can sanction their use, and the launch codes are entrusted solely to the [[Lord Commissar|''Lord'' Commissar]] in charge of the missile, as they are the only individuals with a self-restraint that isn't a [[Commissar|blundering trigger-happy moron that would push the button at the first sign of insubordination.]]

A Vortex missile, like other support missiles, takes up one carapace slot when mounted on a Titan, [[FATAL|although if it is destroyed before being fired it will prematurely activate and create a vortex field.]]

Due to the dangers of assembly and the uncontrollable forces involved, it was once the sole responsibility of the [[Adeptus Mechanicus]] to manufacture Vortex Missiles. By the end of M31, they were officially only to be constructed on Mars, Graia, and Gryphonne IV. From these three worlds, the warheads would then be exported to other Forge Worlds where they would be combined with their missile housings, before being distributed to regiments or fortifications. [[Fail|Because of a clerical glitch]] in the [[Departmento Munitorum]], other Forge Worlds soon began constructing whole vortex missiles. By M35, almost all forge worlds in the Imperium had at least some expertise in their assembly [[Derp|which kind of knocks down its supposed 'rarity'.]] We in /tg/ can't tell whether this is [[Awesome]] or [[Fail]] as the lack of mass utilization of Vortex Missiles whenever a Forge World is under attack makes no sense whatsoever.

===Warp Missile===
[[File:Warp_Missile.JPG|200px|right|thumb|Warp Missile]]
A much bigger Vortex Missile that works on a completely different nature. This thiccboy is mounted only on the [[Missile Launcher#Warp Missile Rack|Warp Missile Rack]] on top the specially designed and modified carapace of the [[Reaver Battle Titan]]. The Warp Missile is unlike the WMD that is the Vortex Missile.

Whereas the Vortex is used in situations deemed FUBAR even by the standards of the Imperium, the Warp Missiles are far more precise and far more specialized. In this case, the Warp Missile is specialized in killing Titans rather than sucking an entire town into the Warp. Due to its specialization, the [[Warp Weapons|Warp Missile]] itself is one of the rarest and most powerful munitions available to Reaver Titan Princeps. Mounted atop the god-machine’s carapace, the Warp Missile can be fired just once. However, once is enough as the Warp Missile [[Awesome|could phase through shields and attack the Titan directly causing severe and catastrophic damage.]] Like a giant [[C'tan Phase Weapons|C'tan Phase Weapon]].

This is not surprising given that Warp Missiles come automatically equipped with a miniature warp engine like those on starships, which when fired, briefly enters the warp and emerges within an enemy Titan’s shields. The gigantic missile penetrator ain't housing anything special, its just a solid piece of FUCK YOU needed to pierce through the thickest armor of any Titan.

On tabletop in the Adeptus Titanicus game, if an attack made by a Warp Missile hits a target, it makes a location roll (Or choose a location if making a Targeted Attack). Then, regardless of whether the target is shielded, a D6 is rolled automatically. On a result of 1, the target location loses 1 structure point. On a 2-3, the target location loses D3 structure points, and if it hits on a 4-6, the target location suffers Critical Damage.

{{Template:40k-Imperial-Weapons}}

==Chaos Variants==
Being either creatures born for the Warp or their mortal servants, the majority of weapons use by the forces of Chaos use Warp energy in one form or another. The most famous ones are the various [[Daemon Weapon]]s that actually house a daemon, but many of the Dark Mechanicus more outlandish weapons are in part or entirely fuelled by the Warp directly.

{{Template:40k-Chaos-Weapons}}

==Xenos Variants==
===Eldar===
Though Warp weapons are considered taboo in Eldar society for their unnerving effects, Eldar military forces always seem to find that they don't really give a good goddamn when it comes to defending the [[craftworld]]s, and as such, make use of more Warp weapons than anyone else in 40k.
====Wraithcannon====
[[File:Wraithcannon.jpg|200px|right|thumb|Wraithcannon]]
Carried by [[Eldar]] [[Wraithguard]] and a certain variant of grav-tank, these guns are just like the Imperial Vortex weapon in that they open a portal and drag anything near it to the warp. They are powered by the Wraithguard's psychic energy of its spirit stone, the Wraithcannon opens a small temporary rift between real and warp space, tearing apart its target as it is torn between different dimensions.

However, unlike the D-Cannon the Wraithcannon is more tightly controlled and more accurate. The Wraithcannons are so fiendish that no mortal (only Wraithguard) could wield them. There's also the Heavy Wraithcannon, which has triple the range, and is the basic weapon of the Wraithknight.

====D-Scythe====
[[File:D-Scythe.jpg|200px|right|thumb|D-Scythe]]
A variant on the Wraithcannon that is dispersed instead of focused, so it can hit more enemies at once but does less damage. There is once again a heavier variant called the Heavy D-Scythe that's mounted on the Hemlock Wraithfighter.

Considered a sinister and taboo weapon, D-Scythes can rip the soul of an enemy from their body and banish it to the Warp; which doesn't make ANY SENSE because it's firmly established in the setting that an individual is perfectly capable of being alive without a soul, A.K.A psychic blanks, the Sisters of Silence, Necrons etc. (though Necrons aren't organic anymore so whether they're truly 'alive' or not is debatable). This means if D-Scythes work exactly as how they're described, they essentially just turn whoever's on the receiving end of them into a psychic null, ''[[FAIL|which is STUPID because blanks are anathema to psykers, and the Eldar are ALL psykers]]'' [[Derp|(God fucking dammit GeeDubs)]]. It also would render these weapons completely useless against Necrons, T'au drones, the variety of Ad. Mech robots still around and, of course, psychic nulls (this, obviously, doesn't translate at all in the crunch). More likely, the removal of a soul from a being that has one is sufficiently traumatic to kill them. After all, people can survive without an appendix, but very few can survive their appendix exploding while still inside them. When fired, a D-Scythe emits no visible blast and leaves behind no damage, save the motionless corpse of those targeted. D-Scythes are normally wielded by Wraithguards in place of their Wraithcannons.

====D-Cannon====
[[File:Distort_Cannon.png|200px|right|thumb|D-Cannon]]
A larger version of the Wraithcannon mounted on a special artillery platform, the D-Cannon can collapse realspace in a small area and suck in all unlucky sods that stood too close to the hole. [[Meme|You want it.]]

The size of the warp hole created depends on the size of the D-Cannon, with larger weapons requiring more power and a larger chassis to mount them. The largest D-Cannons are those mounted on Eldar Cobras and Phantom Titans, and even Void Shields are useless in defending against them. These terrifying weapons are capable of swallowing multiple battle tanks in one hit, and the shockwave that results from their sudden closure can knock over other armoured vehicles lucky enough to avoid being dragged into Hell.

The AdMech tried numerous times to reverse-engineer and study the mechanics of the D-Cannon. [[FAIL|Failures, one too many.]]

It also has a interesting name.

{{40k-Eldar-Weapons}}

===Orks===
====Shokk Attack Gun====
[[File:Shokk_Attack_Gun.jpg|200px|right|thumb|Shokk Attack Gun]]
The Shokk Attack Gun is one of the only [[Ork]]-portable weapons that force the wielder to stay still while firing, and quite possibly one of the strangest weapons in their arsenal. Its basically an oversized teleporter gun, that transports someone to a location using warp travel. Unprotected. Orks are too smart to get roped into being living ammunition (despite the fact that the law of averages would mean there has to be orks nuts enough to try it), and grots are too feisty to constantly catch and feed into the gun. So, the Meks rely on [[snotling]]s, who are too dumb to realize they're about to be [[Anal Circumference|monumentally screwed]] until its too late.

When the snotling gets fired through the gun, they briefly travel through the warp without any shielding, and so are completely subjected to seeing the multitude of horrors contained within (and remember: time functions differently in the wrap. A second in realspace could very well have been hours, days, or even longer for the snotling). If the snotling successfully makes it out: he's driven completely out of his fucking mind, and will proceed to [[rip and tear]] their way through anything in front of them until they die, including vehicles as the Mek will teleport the snotling right inside the armor, so the crew's stuck with what's essentially a tiny roid-raging slasher villain inside a confined space. How exactly snotlings suddenly possess the power to tear open powered-armor opponents, even after being driven insane, is not fully explained.

Like all complex Ork contraptions: it's crazily unpredictable. It can do anything from [[FAIL|killing everything within D6" of the Big Mek, including the Mek himself]] or [[Awesome|rolling double six and utterly destroying anything under the template.]]

In appearance it is a large, heavy piece of machinery with huge, spinning blades at the front and numerous whirring, grinding cogs and other gubbins sticking out from the casing. When used it makes a distinktive whine, shakes and rattles in an alarming fashion, oily smoke pours from inside as its Mek Operator holds on as tight as he can. It is very hard to aim with a Shokk Attack Gun, as even the strongest Orks find it hard to hold it still. Due to this, its sometimes seen mounted on a Mekboy Junka vehicle, to aid in stabilization and mobility.

==== Tellyport Blasta ====
[[File:Tellyportblasta.jpg|200px|right|thumb|Tellyport Blasta]]
The Tellyport Blasta is an Ork Energy weapon sometimes integrated into Mega Armour used by [[Big Mek|Big Meks.]] Basically an enlarged Shokk Attack Gun that, instead of opening up a Warprift and sucking up Snotlings for ammunitions; is big enough to just use enemy vehicles and units ''as its ammuntion.''

This is because it is based on Tellyporta technology. The weapon folds its target in a Warpspace bubble and displaces it at random. Victims will only travel a short distance before they reappear again, so the Meks use the weapon to rematerialize them high in the air, or inside a solid object. Thus a Tellyport Blasta tends to be unpredictable, but, as many other Ork weapons, still effective.

An enlarged version of this weapon is used on Ork [[Wazbom Blastajet|Wazbom Blastajets.]]

In 8th Edition, it fires an assault range 12" D3 shots at a S8 and AP-2, this thing has an interesting way of instantly killing its victims. Any model that is wounded, but not killed by this gun, is instantly killed at the end of the shooting phase if the Ork Player rolls higher than that model's current wounds on a D6. It is quite nice albeit somewhat situational having a little bit of extra dread for those super beefy characters that were already wounded but cling to their wounds at a virtue of inv save or other shenanigans.

==== Kustom Shokk Rifle ====
[[File:Kustom_Shokk_Rifle.JPG|200px|right|thumb|Kustom Shokk Rifle]]

The Kustom Shokk Rifle is an upsized and overcharged version of the classic Shokk Attack Gun. It is the primary weapon of the [[Shokkjump Dragsta]] and was originally conceived when the Mad Mek Gungubbinz [[Wat|somehow managed to fire himself out of his own Shokk Attack Gun and live,]] the Kustom Shokk Rifle within the Shokkjump Dragsta incorporates part of the mechanics of a Shokk Attack Gun into its engine, allowing it to teleport short distances at will. Needless to say, most of the Dragsta's drivers tend to be not completely sane.

Additionally, the Kustom Shokk Rifle is able to zap targeted units into the [[Warp]] just like the Shokk Attack Gun, although whilst the Shokk Attack Gun uses [[Snotling|Snotlings]] as live ammunition, the purpose of the Kustom Shokk Rifle behaves similarly to the Eldar D-Cannons.

Crunchwise, the Kustom Shokk Rifle is a 24" Assault 2 weapon that is strength 8, AP-3 and damages on a D6. Rolling a hit roll on a 1 causes the bearer to suffer one mortal wound whilst rolling a 6 on a wound roll causes the target to suffer one mortal wound along with any other damage sustained beforehand.

{{40k-Ork-Weapons}}

===Hrud===
====Warp Fusil====
The [[Hrud]] use a type of warp-laced plasma to create a potent sniper weapon called the Warp Fusil. The plasma shot dematerializes from real space for a moment, allowing it to bypass barriers and armour, before emerging into reality a moment later and making a gooey, charred mess of whatever was aimed at. Because Hrud infest everywhere and their warp fusils are excellent at assassinating things, they see use among many alien and imperial mercenaries.

===Kinebrach ===
The Kinebrach used to make weapons, of which at least some required interaction with the Warp or Warp entities during their creation. Some of the weapons were [[Cubes]]. The production of many, if not all of their weaponry was later considered forbidden. The [[Interex]] showed these weapons to the Imperium, despite suspecting the Imperium being tainted by Kaos (their word for [[Chaos]]). This may have been a test to see if they were actually tainted by Kaos, an attempt to impress the militaristic Imperium, or both.

==Old Ones Variants==
During the [[War in Heaven]], the Old Ones discovered that the [[C'Tan]] and their [[Necron]] armies were vulnerable against psychic forces. To capitalize on this weakness, they had the ''brilliant'' idea of [[FAIL|weaponizing the Warp]], thus turning it into the twisted shit-pit it is now. Of particular note is the Shadowlight, believed to be the power source of some larger assembly. The power source alone is capable of making psykers more powerful, latent psykers become psykers, and anyone else dies a gruesome death upon unprotected exposure to it (although psykers, latent or otherwise, might also suffer said gruesome death). According to a psyker inquisitor, if Chaos got their hands on it, there would be a lot of unsanctioned psykers running around (duh), and without the Emperor's protection they would get possessed, and within 2 generations the Eye of Terror would expand so large that it would engulf the entire Imperium. It is suspected that the assembly "can alter the very fabric of reality". This suspicion proved correct, as later it opened a portal to the warp, and a daemon came out. The assembly's intended purpose is unknown, but it is suspected to be designed to somehow help the old ones in the war against the C'Tan.

=== [[Blackstone Fortress]] ===

Each of these weapons was a star fortress equipped with main guns that made the [[Star Wars|Death Star]] look like a fucking pea shooter. Drawing upon the [[warp]] and channeling staggering amounts of power, they fired beams of pure psychic energy that caused anything in their path to suffer critical existence failure. These things were anti-'''star''' weapons! During the [[Battlefleet Gothic|Gothic war]], [[Abaddon]] used three ''partially'' re-activated Fortresses to destroy the entire Tarantis system by blowing the local sun a new asshole, causing it to go supernova. Quite characteristically, Abaddon still manages to lose the war with such powerful weapons.

Somehow, the [[Void Dragon]] survived a combined blast from multiple of these things and all it did was make him a bit drowsy. WOW. Then the Big E kicked him in the balls. Which gives you a pretty good idea of how shit of an idea it is to piss off the emprah. Except the Emperor fought only a mere shard of the Void Dragon, not the fully-formed C'Tan, which is literally a god, as powerful in the material realm as the Chaos Gods are in the Warp. Can Big E do that now? Probably. Could he when he was Saint George? Probably not.

[[Category: Warhammer 40,000]]

[[Category: Imperial]]

[[Category: Chaos]]

[[Category: Xenos]]

[[Category: Eldar]]

[[Category: Craftworld Eldar]]

[[Category: Orks]]

[[Category: Weapons]]

[[Category: Warhammer Weapons]]

Warp Weapons

2020-10-15T15:59:28Z

2A02:1811:5180:A200:EC3D:29FD:FA1D:618: /* Vortex Missile */

In [[Warhammer 40,000]], there are few things more dangerous to life in the galaxy than the [[Warp]]. Especially when it's weaponized. Some of the deadliest weapons in existence, Warp Weapons are devices capable of using the warp to deal tremendous damage to any target presented with.

==Imperial Variants==

'''Vortex Weapons''' are based on the same technology as the warp engines of a voidship: they basically tear a momentary 'hole' (aforementioned vortex) between realspace and the Warp. But where a spaceship is (hopefully) protected by a [[Gellar Field]] to survive the experience, anything that gets sucked through find itself at the [[/d/|tender (lack of) mercy]] of the [[daemon|denizens of the Warp]]. Those weapons are frighteningly effective, but they are used with circumspection. In theory, the vortex' existence is very brief. In practice, sometimes it somehow can sustain itself and it starts drifting around... Or growing... or [[demon|things]] start coming through from the other side to have some fun...

Imperial sanctioned weapons come in two variations: Vortex grenades that are man-portable but whose effect is limited and the Vortex Missile which is mounted on either a [[Deathstrike Missile Launcher]] or [[Reaver Battle Titan|Reaver]]/[[Warlord Battle Titan|Warlord]] Battle Titans and can hatefuck much more massive holes in reality in a single strike.

An example of a non-standard Vortex Weapon is the [[Hero of the Imperium|Dominus Astra]], an Emperor Class Battleship, which when strategically located and having its warp drive detonated was capable of destroying almost all of [[Hive Fleet Behemoth]]. Needless to say this is not something the Imperium is well equipped to do, as each Emperor-class is nigh-irreplaceable...

===Vortex Grenade===
[[File:VortexGrenade.jpg|200px|right|thumb|Vortex Grenade]]
The smallest vortex weapon and the only one that can be used by hand. The vortex grenade is a rare and deadly weapon which utilizes complex warp technology to create a vortex between real space and the warp on activation. They are very difficult to produce, with only the [[Adeptus Mechanicus]] being able to manufacture them, and are not issued to regular troops, but to important Imperial agents such as [[Inquisitors]] or [[Assassinorum|Assassins]] (Probably because they are the only ones trained enough to know ''when'' and ''where'' to toss them, in contrast to your average Joe who would treat them like a normal grenade and cause accidental friendly fire).

The Vortex Grenade takes the form of a weighty sphere, approximately the size as the fist of a grown man, consisting of an outer shell which encases a delicate and temperamental warp mechanism. The designs of the device date back to the [[Dark Age of Technology]].

When the grenade is activated, it creates a tiny rift between realspace and the warp, a rift that becomes a vortex in the very fabric of space. In appearance the vortex is a ball of glowing blackness like a small black hole. Everyone and everything encompassed by the vortex is destroyed; all matter and energy is drawn through the vortex and it is turned into the very stuff of the warp.

It is unknown how applicable they can be when fired from a regular grenade launcher.

===Rift Cannon===
[[File:Rift_Cannon.JPG|200px|right|thumb|Rift Cannon]]
The '''Rift Cannon''' or otherwise known as the Kaleidoscope Cannon or the [[Drug|LSD Cannon]] by /tg/, is used by the [[Dark Angels]] Space Marine Chapter is also a warp weapon supposedly developed in the Dark Age of Technology. When fired, a beam of warp energy emerges that resembles a kaleidoscope of colors blossoming into a small rift in the Immaterium, opening at the beam's point of contact, while those who survive the brief tear in the Materium find themselves thrown awry. The weapon is amusingly called the ''Stained Glass Cannon'' primarily due to this kaleidoscopic explosion, which means that the enemies of Man [[Gay|literally taste the motherfucking rainbow.]]

In 8th Edition, the Rift Cannon is now a Heavy D3 Strength 10 AP -3 weapon. Its Rift Vortex works way better, no longer rolling scatter doubles. Instead, the weapon causes the target to roll a D6 against the Rift Vortex chart when wounded, dealing an additional D3 Mortal Wounds if rolled. The Vortex chart actually scales with the Dark Talon's BS depending on how many wounds are left on the target, which often starts at a 3+/4+/5+ scaling. In 9th Edition, the Rift Cannon now gains an amped-up version of the Blast ability, giving it the capability to automatically have its 3 shots hit successfully if the unit targeted has 6 or more models.

===Vortex Missile===
[[image:VortexMissile.jpg|200px|right|thumb|Vortex Missile]]
If the regular nuclear warhead of a [[Missile Launcher#Deathstrike Missile|Deathstrike Missile]] won't do it for you, then sending your enemies into the hatefuck realm that is the [[Warp]], will. As previously noted, the Warp tech of the Imperium is not as sophisticated and controlled as that of the [[Eldar]]. As such, they prefer launching these Warp weapons using ''very'' long-ranged missiles in order to hit targets far enough away that Imperial forces remain unaffected.

Due to the fact that they came from the [[Dark Age of Technology]], these missiles are as rare as they are powerful, creating a miniature (and short-lived) [[Eye of Terror]] when they explode. Vortex missiles are constructed by using [[Psykers]] to channel the raw energy of the Warp into an intercontinental ballistic missile. [[Derp|How the hell that works, we have no idea.]] (To note, older fluff described the warhead as a miniaturized one-shot Warp Drive like those found on starships, which makes slightly more sense, I guess...)

Vortex missiles mounted on [[Deathstrike Missile Launcher|Deathstrike Platforms]] are so valuable that they are guarded at a minimum by an entire infantry platoon, charged with concealing the weapon from enemy saboteurs and kill-teams. Nominally only Segmentum Command can sanction their use, and the launch codes are entrusted solely to the [[Lord Commissar|''Lord'' Commissar]] in charge of the missile, as they are the only individuals with a self-restraint that isn't a [[Commissar|blundering trigger-happy moron that would push the button at the first sign of insubordination.]]

A Vortex missile, like other support missiles, takes up one carapace slot when mounted on a Titan, [[FATAL|although if it is destroyed before being fired it will prematurely activate and create a vortex field.]]

Due to the dangers of assembly and the uncontrollable forces involved, it was once the sole responsibility of the [[Adeptus Mechanicus]] to manufacture Vortex Missiles. By the end of M31, they were officially only to be constructed on Mars, Graia, and Gryphonne IV. From these three worlds, the warheads would then be exported to other Forge Worlds where they would be combined with their missile housings, before being distributed to regiments or fortifications. [[Fail|Because of a clerical glitch]] in the [[Departmento Munitorum]], other Forge Worlds soon began constructing whole vortex missiles. By M35, almost all forge worlds in the Imperium had at least some expertise in their assembly [[Derp|which kind of knocks down its supposed 'rarity'.]] We in /tg/ can't tell whether this is [[Awesome]] or [[Fail]] as the lack of mass utilization of Vortex Missiles whenever a Forge World is under attack makes no sense whatsoever.

===Warp Missile===
[[File:Warp_Missile.JPG|200px|right|thumb|Warp Missile]]
A much bigger Vortex Missile that works on a completely different nature. This thiccboy is mounted only on the [[Missile Launcher#Warp Missile Rack|Warp Missile Rack]] on top the specially designed and modified carapace of the [[Reaver Battle Titan]]. The Warp Missile is unlike the WMD that is the Vortex Missile.

Whereas the Vortex is used in situations deemed FUBAR even by the standards of the Imperium, the Warp Missiles are far more precise and far more specialized. In this case, the Warp Missile is specialized in killing Titans rather than sucking an entire town into the Warp. Due to its specialization, the [[Warp Weapons|Warp Missile]] itself is one of the rarest and most powerful munitions available to Reaver Titan Princeps. Mounted atop the god-machine’s carapace, the Warp Missile can be fired just once. However, once is enough as the Warp Missile [[Awesome|could phase through shields and attack the Titan directly causing severe and catastrophic damage.]] Like a giant [[C'tan Phase Weapons|C'tan Phase Weapon]].

This is not surprising given that Warp Missiles come automatically equipped with a miniature warp engine like those on starships, which when fired, briefly enters the warp and emerges within an enemy Titan’s shields. The gigantic missile penetrator ain't housing anything special, its just a solid piece of FUCK YOU needed to pierce through the thickest armor of any Titan.

On tabletop in the Adeptus Titanicus game, if an attack made by a Warp Missile hits a target, it makes a location roll (Or choose a location if making a Targeted Attack). Then, regardless of whether the target is shielded, a D6 is rolled automatically. On a result of 1, the target location loses 1 structure point. On a 2-3, the target location loses D3 structure points, and if it hits on a 4-6, the target location suffers Critical Damage.

{{Template:40k-Imperial-Weapons}}

==Chaos Variants==
Being either creatures born for the Warp or their mortal servants, the majority of weapons use by the forces of Chaos use Warp energy in one form or another. The most famous ones are the various [[Daemon Weapon]]s that actually house a daemon, but many of the Dark Mechanicus more outlandish weapons are in part or entirely fuelled by the Warp directly.

{{Template:40k-Chaos-Weapons}}

==Xenos Variants==
===Eldar===
Though Warp weapons are considered taboo in Eldar society for their unnerving effects, Eldar military forces always seem to find that they don't really give a good goddamn when it comes to defending the [[craftworld]]s, and as such, make use of more Warp weapons than anyone else in 40k.
====Wraithcannon====
[[File:Wraithcannon.jpg|200px|right|thumb|Wraithcannon]]
Carried by [[Eldar]] [[Wraithguard]] and a certain variant of grav-tank, these guns are just like the Imperial Vortex weapon in that they open a portal and drag anything near it to the warp. They are powered by the Wraithguard's psychic energy of its spirit stone, the Wraithcannon opens a small temporary rift between real and warp space, tearing apart its target as it is torn between different dimensions.

However, unlike the D-Cannon the Wraithcannon is more tightly controlled and more accurate. The Wraithcannons are so fiendish that no mortal (only Wraithguard) could wield them. There's also the Heavy Wraithcannon, which has triple the range, and is the basic weapon of the Wraithknight.

====D-Scythe====
[[File:D-Scythe.jpg|200px|right|thumb|D-Scythe]]
A variant on the Wraithcannon that is dispersed instead of focused, so it can hit more enemies at once but does less damage. There is once again a heavier variant called the Heavy D-Scythe that's mounted on the Hemlock Wraithfighter.

Considered a sinister and taboo weapon, D-Scythes can rip the soul of an enemy from their body and banish it to the Warp; which doesn't make ANY SENSE because it's firmly established in the setting that an individual is perfectly capable of being alive without a soul, A.K.A psychic blanks, the Sisters of Silence, Necrons etc. (though Necrons aren't organic anymore so whether they're truly 'alive' or not is debatable). This means if D-Scythes work exactly as how they're described, they essentially just turn whoever's on the receiving end of them into a psychic null, ''[[FAIL|which is STUPID because blanks are anathema to psykers, and the Eldar are ALL psykers]]'' [[Derp|(God fucking dammit GeeDubs)]]. It also would render these weapons completely useless against Necrons, T'au drones, the variety of Ad. Mech robots still around and, of course, psychic nulls (this, obviously, doesn't translate at all in the crunch). More likely, the removal of a soul from a being that has one is sufficiently traumatic to kill them. After all, people can survive without an appendix, but very few can survive their appendix exploding while still inside them. When fired, a D-Scythe emits no visible blast and leaves behind no damage, save the motionless corpse of those targeted. D-Scythes are normally wielded by Wraithguards in place of their Wraithcannons.

====D-Cannon====
[[File:Distort_Cannon.png|200px|right|thumb|D-Cannon]]
A larger version of the Wraithcannon mounted on a special artillery platform, the D-Cannon can collapse realspace in a small area and suck in all unlucky sods that stood too close to the hole. [[Meme|You want it.]]

The size of the warp hole created depends on the size of the D-Cannon, with larger weapons requiring more power and a larger chassis to mount them. The largest D-Cannons are those mounted on Eldar Cobras and Phantom Titans, and even Void Shields are useless in defending against them. These terrifying weapons are capable of swallowing multiple battle tanks in one hit, and the shockwave that results from their sudden closure can knock over other armoured vehicles lucky enough to avoid being dragged into Hell.

The AdMech tried numerous times to reverse-engineer and study the mechanics of the D-Cannon. [[FAIL|Failures, one too many.]]

It also has a interesting name.

{{40k-Eldar-Weapons}}

===Orks===
====Shokk Attack Gun====
[[File:Shokk_Attack_Gun.jpg|200px|right|thumb|Shokk Attack Gun]]
The Shokk Attack Gun is one of the only [[Ork]]-portable weapons that force the wielder to stay still while firing, and quite possibly one of the strangest weapons in their arsenal. Its basically an oversized teleporter gun, that transports someone to a location using warp travel. Unprotected. Orks are too smart to get roped into being living ammunition (despite the fact that the law of averages would mean there has to be orks nuts enough to try it), and grots are too feisty to constantly catch and feed into the gun. So, the Meks rely on [[snotling]]s, who are too dumb to realize they're about to be [[Anal Circumference|monumentally screwed]] until its too late.

When the snotling gets fired through the gun, they briefly travel through the warp without any shielding, and so are completely subjected to seeing the multitude of horrors contained within (and remember: time functions differently in the wrap. A second in realspace could very well have been hours, days, or even longer for the snotling). If the snotling successfully makes it out: he's driven completely out of his fucking mind, and will proceed to [[rip and tear]] their way through anything in front of them until they die, including vehicles as the Mek will teleport the snotling right inside the armor, so the crew's stuck with what's essentially a tiny roid-raging slasher villain inside a confined space. How exactly snotlings suddenly possess the power to tear open powered-armor opponents, even after being driven insane, is not fully explained.

Like all complex Ork contraptions: it's crazily unpredictable. It can do anything from [[FAIL|killing everything within D6" of the Big Mek, including the Mek himself]] or [[Awesome|rolling double six and utterly destroying anything under the template.]]

In appearance it is a large, heavy piece of machinery with huge, spinning blades at the front and numerous whirring, grinding cogs and other gubbins sticking out from the casing. When used it makes a distinktive whine, shakes and rattles in an alarming fashion, oily smoke pours from inside as its Mek Operator holds on as tight as he can. It is very hard to aim with a Shokk Attack Gun, as even the strongest Orks find it hard to hold it still. Due to this, its sometimes seen mounted on a Mekboy Junka vehicle, to aid in stabilization and mobility.

==== Tellyport Blasta ====
[[File:Tellyportblasta.jpg|200px|right|thumb|Tellyport Blasta]]
The Tellyport Blasta is an Ork Energy weapon sometimes integrated into Mega Armour used by [[Big Mek|Big Meks.]] Basically an enlarged Shokk Attack Gun that, instead of opening up a Warprift and sucking up Snotlings for ammunitions; is big enough to just use enemy vehicles and units ''as its ammuntion.''

This is because it is based on Tellyporta technology. The weapon folds its target in a Warpspace bubble and displaces it at random. Victims will only travel a short distance before they reappear again, so the Meks use the weapon to rematerialize them high in the air, or inside a solid object. Thus a Tellyport Blasta tends to be unpredictable, but, as many other Ork weapons, still effective.

An enlarged version of this weapon is used on Ork [[Wazbom Blastajet|Wazbom Blastajets.]]

In 8th Edition, it fires an assault range 12" D3 shots at a S8 and AP-2, this thing has an interesting way of instantly killing its victims. Any model that is wounded, but not killed by this gun, is instantly killed at the end of the shooting phase if the Ork Player rolls higher than that model's current wounds on a D6. It is quite nice albeit somewhat situational having a little bit of extra dread for those super beefy characters that were already wounded but cling to their wounds at a virtue of inv save or other shenanigans.

==== Kustom Shokk Rifle ====
[[File:Kustom_Shokk_Rifle.JPG|200px|right|thumb|Kustom Shokk Rifle]]

The Kustom Shokk Rifle is an upsized and overcharged version of the classic Shokk Attack Gun. It is the primary weapon of the [[Shokkjump Dragsta]] and was originally conceived when the Mad Mek Gungubbinz [[Wat|somehow managed to fire himself out of his own Shokk Attack Gun and live,]] the Kustom Shokk Rifle within the Shokkjump Dragsta incorporates part of the mechanics of a Shokk Attack Gun into its engine, allowing it to teleport short distances at will. Needless to say, most of the Dragsta's drivers tend to be not completely sane.

Additionally, the Kustom Shokk Rifle is able to zap targeted units into the [[Warp]] just like the Shokk Attack Gun, although whilst the Shokk Attack Gun uses [[Snotling|Snotlings]] as live ammunition, the purpose of the Kustom Shokk Rifle behaves similarly to the Eldar D-Cannons.

Crunchwise, the Kustom Shokk Rifle is a 24" Assault 2 weapon that is strength 8, AP-3 and damages on a D6. Rolling a hit roll on a 1 causes the bearer to suffer one mortal wound whilst rolling a 6 on a wound roll causes the target to suffer one mortal wound along with any other damage sustained beforehand.

{{40k-Ork-Weapons}}

===Hrud===
====Warp Fusil====
The [[Hrud]] use a type of warp-laced plasma to create a potent sniper weapon called the Warp Fusil. The plasma shot dematerializes from real space for a moment, allowing it to bypass barriers and armour, before emerging into reality a moment later and making a gooey, charred mess of whatever was aimed at. Because Hrud infest everywhere and their warp fusils are excellent at assassinating things, they see use among many alien and imperial mercenaries.

===Kinebrach ===
The Kinebrach used to make weapons, of which at least some required interaction with the Warp or Warp entities during their creation. Some of the weapons were [[Cubes]]. The production of many, if not all of their weaponry was later considered forbidden. The [[Interex]] showed these weapons to the Imperium, despite suspecting the Imperium being tainted by Kaos (their word for [[Chaos]]). This may have been a test to see if they were actually tainted by Kaos, an attempt to impress the militaristic Imperium, or both.

==Old Ones Variants==
During the [[War in Heaven]], the Old Ones discovered that the [[C'Tan]] and their [[Necron]] armies were vulnerable against psychic forces. To capitalize on this weakness, they had the ''brilliant'' idea of [[FAIL|weaponizing the Warp]], thus turning it into the twisted shit-pit it is now. Of particular note is the Shadowlight, believed to be the power source of some larger assembly. The power source alone is capable of making psykers more powerful, latent psykers become psykers, and anyone else dies a gruesome death upon unprotected exposure to it (although psykers, latent or otherwise, might also suffer said gruesome death). According to a psyker inquisitor, if Chaos got their hands on it, there would be a lot of unsanctioned psykers running around (duh), and without the Emperor's protection they would get possessed, and within 2 generations the Eye of Terror would expand so large that it would engulf the entire Imperium. It is suspected that the assembly "can alter the very fabric of reality". This suspicion proved correct, as later it opened a portal to the warp, and a daemon came out. The assembly's intended purpose is unknown, but it is suspected to be designed to somehow help the old ones in the war against the C'Tan.

=== [[Blackstone Fortress]] ===

Each of these weapons was a star fortress equipped with main guns that made the [[Star Wars|Death Star]] look like a fucking pea shooter. Drawing upon the [[warp]] and channeling staggering amounts of power, they fired beams of pure psychic energy that caused anything in their path to suffer critical existence failure. These things were anti-'''star''' weapons! During the [[Battlefleet Gothic|Gothic war]], [[Abaddon]] used three ''partially'' re-activated Fortresses to destroy the entire Tarantis system by blowing the local sun a new asshole, causing it to go supernova. Quite characteristically, Abaddon still manages to lose the war with such powerful weapons.

Somehow, the [[Void Dragon]] survived a combined blast from multiple of these things and all it did was make him a bit drowsy. WOW. Then the Big E kicked him in the balls. Which gives you a pretty good idea of how shit of an idea it is to piss off the emprah. Except the Emperor fought only a mere shard of the Void Dragon, not the fully-formed C'Tan, which is literally a god, as powerful in the material realm as the Chaos Gods are in the Warp. Can Big E do that now? Probably. Could he when he was Saint George? Probably not.

[[Category: Warhammer 40,000]]

[[Category: Imperial]]

[[Category: Chaos]]

[[Category: Xenos]]

[[Category: Eldar]]

[[Category: Craftworld Eldar]]

[[Category: Orks]]

[[Category: Weapons]]

[[Category: Warhammer Weapons]]

Lorgar

2020-10-15T10:26:32Z

2A02:1811:5180:A200:EC3D:29FD:FA1D:618: L2topquote, please!

{{heresy}}
[[Image:Lorgar Handsome.jpg|400px|thumb|right|Bet you didn't know Mr. Clean was a primarch. An Evil Primarch.]]

{{Topquote|From fanaticism to barbarism is only one step.|Denis Diderot}}

{{Topquote|For years I have despised Lorgar... look at [[Roboute Guilliman|your primarch]], Honorius. So singular in aspect. So noble. I have envied you, envied the [[Rogal Dorn|Imperial Fists]], the [[Horus|Luna Wolves]], the [[Ferrus Manus|Iron Hands]]. And I am not alone. We struggle with a mercurial mind, Honorius. We labour under the burden of a brilliant but fallible commander. We no longer bear the word, my friend. We bear '''''Lorgar'''''.|Sorot Tchure, a Captain of the Word Bearers, to Captain Honorius Luciel of the [[Ultramarines]] (shortly before Tchure betrayed him at Calth)}}

{{Topquote|The difference between gods and daemons largely depends upon where one is standing at the time.|<s>The dude himself.</s> [[Argel Tal]], when speaking about how it feels like to be [[Possessed]]. Lorgar liked the sentence and jotted it down, [[Blood Ravens|hence it's erroneously attributed to him]].}}

{{topquote|All I ever wanted was the truth...|First line of the Book Of Lorgar}}

{{Topquote|THAT WAS LORGAR!|[[Magnus the Red]], [[If the Emperor had a Text-to-Speech Device|on fucking everything in the Imperium up.]]}}

The human incarnation of 'Did Nothing Wrong'.

'''Lorgar''', also known as '''Lorgar Aurelian''', '''Bearer of the Word''', '''The Urizen''' (cf. William Blake), '''The Golden One''', '''[[TTS|The Goddamned Choir Boy]]''', and (if you're [[Konrad Curze]]) '''[[Awesome|Pathetic]]''', is the [[Primarch]] of the [[Word Bearers]] legion, the extra religious legion of [[Chaos Space Marines|Kheyos Sphess Mahreens]]. He is credited within [[40k]] [[fluff]] for being ''the'' first Primarch to fall to the [[Chaos Gods|Ruinous Powers]]. Yes, we know what you're thinking and no, [[Horus]] was just the most powerful Primarch to lead the actual Rebellion and the first to be public about it. Lorgar was the first to be corrupted, though this wasn't noticed as he was very secretive about it. Also, looks just like Patrick Stewart, and Handsome Squidward.

Tl;dr: [[Horus Heresy|EVERYTHING]] is this guy's fault. Seriously, [[Archaon]] has nothing on this guy...#BlameLorgar

==Pre-Heresy==
[[File:Past-Lorgar-Primarchs-.jpeg|300px|right|thumb|Young Lorgar writing his first <s>Chaos</s> religious fan-fic.]]
Like the rest of the Primarchs, Lorgar was scattered through the Warp by the [[Chaos Gods]]. The infant landed on Colchis, a world of excellence, beauty and most of all, faith. Lorgar was taken in by [[Kor Phaeron]], a former priest of the Covenant (Colchis' chief religious order) and a Chaos worshipper. As he grew, he was educated in philosophy and rhetoric and he was gifted with a charisma that greatly aided his role as a preacher, making him immensely popular with the Colchisian faithful. At first, he remained a staunch defender of the Faith, but his life changed due to his frequent visions of a new [[God-Emperor of Mankind|Messiah]] arriving into Colchis, clad in [[Pauldrons|gleaming armour]], who rode on [[Imperial Navy|clouds of iron]] as he led his [[Space Marines|army of angels]] across the stars. Though Kor Phaeron had little patience for what he considered [[Heresy]], his own grudges with the Covenent meant that when they declared war on Lorgar and all his followers Kor Phaeron would aid his "son" (and continue to give lip service to the Emperor until the time was right). Six long years engulfed Colchis into Civil War, yet, due to his insane charisma convincing thousands upon thousands of faithful to worship the new Messiah, Lorgar won through [[Imperial Guard|sheer numbers]]. By the time they were done, the [[God-Emperor of Mankind|Emperor of Mankind]] and [[Magnus the Red]] arrived on Colchis and everybody was absolutely ''ecstatic.'' Almost overnight Colchis became an extravagant world all in devotion to the Emperor. After about a month of celebrations, the now slightly annoyed Emperor appointed Lorgar head of the Imperial Heralds, which Lorgar renamed the Word Bearers.

During the [[Great Crusade]], Lorgar loved the Emperor. Like ''really'' loved him; in fact, he was the only Primarch to both consider him a god and actively spread said belief wherever he went. He loved the Emprah so much that he wrote the Lectitio Divinitatus which was all about the divinity of the Emperor, and built huge Gothic cathedrals on every single world the Word Bearers conquered. And, ironically enough for a being genetically engineered to be a super-soldier and general, he disliked war. To say his generally preachy attitude didn't endear him to his brothers is an understatement. Except for Horus, Leman Russ and Magnus; Lorgar had little friends or support amongst his brothers. (Guilliman respected the fact he rebuilt planets after conquering them but they were never really close and he would become something of a pal with Angron during the Heresy, as much as can be said that Angron could be.) This is best demonstrated by the following example: at one point the Word Bearers had come to the help of the Iron Hands, so Ferrus Manus decided to craft a nice weapon for Lorgar as a thank-you gift. Lorgar was actually happy but as he watched Manus busy at his forge, he couldn't help to wonder ([[Fail|aloud]]) whether his brother would be able to craft anything beside tools for war with his metal hands. Manus didn't really appreciate the comment and wondered back if Lorgar would able to craft anything at all! Ferrus still gave him ''Illuminarum'' and Lorgar would wield the huge Crozius Arcanum from then on, but the incident only broadened the wedge between them.

Unbeknownst to Lorgar, [[The Last Church|the Emperor was a NAYtheist]], and was ''really'' disappointed towards his son but waited 100 years before telling by having the [[Ultramarines|Smurfs]] destroy Lorgar's greatest masterpiece city, Monarchia, like any good bad daddy would have done it. It's like he was begging Lorgar to fall to Chaos. Lorgar's religiosity threatened to undermine his top-secret project to starve Chaos of any kind of worship. He made Lorgar stop his god worship in a very good-daddy kind of way: He then used his [[Psyker]] powers to [[Troll|force Lorgar and 100 thousand of his legion to kneel]] before [[That guy|the Emperor]], [[Roboute Guilliman]], and [[Malcador|Malcador the Sigilite]]. Destroying an entire city is one thing, but being forced to kneel down before Great Grandpa Smurf was of such humiliation that it would inflict clinically incurable depression into anyone... Which is totally understandable as the Emprah had waited a whole century to tell that he was not at all into this being worshipped as a god thing Lorgar kept preaching about all the time, only to have the Ultramarines destroy the city Lorgar considered one of his greatest achievements to make his point - again - this was 100 years after Lorgar's discovery by big E, and Lorgar rightfully pointed out to Magnus that the Emprah had spent weeks on Colchis following his arrival and had witnessed that people were clearly worshipping him as a God, yet had said nothing then, only to tell Lorgar a century later that he was a failure and should shape up (see "The First Heretic").

What is even more mind boggling is that - despite this fact - it neither occurred to the Emprah nor Magnus, who are both supposed to be hyper geniuses, that it probably would have been the sensible thing to tell Lorgar right then and there that religion was not really the Emprah's thing... instead of waiting a whole century before letting Lorgar know that he had messed up. The Emprah even went so far as to tell Lorgar that "out of all of his sons" Lorgar, and Lorgar alone, had failed him. Again, after 100 years, making his bitterness and eventual fall of Chaos much more understandable. Considering such, the Emprah could not have reacted worse; severe enough to embitter Lorgar but without any attempt to rehabilitate the inevitable festering wound. A fact that apparently Malcador eventually realized at some point as in the audio drama he says "if there is one Primarch I wish we could have saved, I would have hoped it to be Lorgar" (not exact quote, but close). Guilliman had similar reservations. He never acted on them until too [[Battle of Calth|late]], probably because Lorgar had not even been super excited about what he saw in the Warp and called it "horror. But with the gentle guidance of Kor Phaeron and (fuck) Erebus they eventually managed to corrupt him.

Severely humiliated and wracked with self-doubt, Lorgar secluded himself in Emo sulking, and began listening to Kor Phaeron (now First Captain of the Word Bearers) and First [[Chaplain]] [[Erebus]] about the facts of the Old Faith of Colchis: many other worlds shared similar concepts of such gods. Having unrelated worlds share a single common faith, is this evidence that [[Chaos|such Gods beyond the realm of material existence]] truly existed and were worthy of worship? This in turn led to Lorgar, willing to expand his enlightenment and guided by the sorcerer Ingethel the Ascended of the planet [[Cadia]], plunging headfirst into the [[Eye of Terror]]. The rest is <s>history</s> heresy.

Before the heresy Lorgar was widely considered the weakest Primarch as both a fighter and warlord, preferring to act more as a [[Reasonable Marines|diplomat]] and [[Ecclesiarchy|preacher]]. His actions during the Heresy proved everyone wrong (or maybe his power grew massively once he tapped into his psychic powers- he nearly got shredded by Corvus during the Drop Site Massacre). When Lorgar first toured the Eye of Terror, he was forced to fight An'ggrath the Unbound (who is to [[Bloodthirster]]s what Bloodthirsters are to Gretchin) in order to prove himself worthy of becoming the champion of Chaos Undivided, and [[What|won]]. He also got a visit from Kairos Fateweaver, informing him of his possible futures in a one-time deal where that [[Lord of Change]] would only speak the truth, primarily involving his future campaign on Calth, and a very important choice to make.

His<s> plan of attack</s> shooting of his allies in the back on Calth resulted in beating the shit out of Ultramarine forces two times his army's size, proving Lorgar was also a damn good warlord. Even the fact that his Calth attack force was finally screwed over was part of his plan: the entire point of the Calth war was to purge the Legion of ignorant hotheads who put revenge and hatred over Chaos worshiping, in addition, Fateweaver explicitly told him that [[Roboute Guilliman]] had to survive the campaign on Calth, which would cause him to become paranoid & doubtful and therefore start summoning his forces to [[Macragge]] to create '''[[Imperium Secundus]]''' which would starve [[Terra]] of resources and possibly swing the war in the direction of Horus. Killing Guilliman would mean that the separatists would never get that chance, so Lorgar had to make a choice between slaying his most hated brother, or sparing him for a shot at something greater.

By the way, in the Horus Heresy novels it's seen he actually cared a lot for all of his brothers and tried to befriend them. Closest to him among his brothers was perhaps Magnus, which is more than you can say about some loyalist primarchs. Though with different approaches, they were both more scholars than warriors, with lifelong pursuit of knowledge and enlightenment. And both felt more or less distanced from others due to their interests ad ideologies. So its natural that the Religious Preacher and a Philosopher King saw kindred spirits in eachother. He was also pretty much the only one who cared about Angron in some way and actually ran the ritual which transformed Angron into a Daemon Prince, thus freeing him of the Butcher's Nails and premature death. He even seems to be good friends with Leman Russ, referenced in Betrayer given that Russ read something Lorgar wrote and thought that was some spiritual shit worth remembering, which is pretty significant considering how down-to-earth this guy was. Also in The First Heretic, Magnus tells Lorgar that Russ argued for preserving Lorgar's place in the crusade and sparing him excommunication when the Emps was pondering kicking Lorgar to the curb. More significantly, when Lorgar asked Russ and Magnus to stop fighting, they '''actually listened.''' The two Primarchs who just might have had the most mutual hatred stopped fighting because Lorgar asked them to. And with this comes another major topic with Lorgar:

Emperor was generally unsatisfied with the slow rate of reclamation by the Word Bearers and due to this regarded him as one of the most inefficient Primarchs. However, this may rather show how incredibly moronic the Emperor could be in his judgement. Yes, Lorgar wasnt as fast in conquests as his brethren. HOWEVER, there are these factors to be considered:
#Lorgar rarely even engaged in combat. Most of the reclaimed planets were won by word and faith, rather than fire and sword.
#Consequently from the first one, planets under Lorgar were not been left as [[Perturabo|ruined]], [[Konrad_Curze|terrorized]], [[Angron|Butchered]], [[Mortarion|Desolate shitholes]], and newly acquired, intact planets would start giving immediate benefits to the Imperium. In fact, alongside Dorn and Guilliman, Lorgar was one of the rarer conquerors who left the conquered place in BETTER state than before the conquest.
#One of the main reasons for the slow rate of reclamation by Lorgar was because he spent large amount of time spreading his ideology among local population. Due to his charisma and religious zeal, he would convince the population of the benefits of Imperial rule, how great and mighty humans would be when they would rule the entire Galaxy and so on, to the point that the citizens would become fiercely loyal to the Imperium, rendering a rebellion practically impossible.
Now, with these factors in mind, a [[Reasonable_Marines|Reasonable ruler]] who is not [[Emperor|headachingly retarded]], once he would find out what kind of person he was dealing with, would perhaps simply relieve him from his military duties, and instead would appoint him as head of the Imperial Propaganda or Diplomatic apparatus, where his talents would be used at maximum efficiency. Angron or Mortarion might have been able to make war more effectively, but only Horus was Lorgar's equal in diplomacy. Even when grudging with his brothers he was quite diplomatic, and he sincerely believed he could eventually convince everyone else about his point of view on the Emperor's divinity.

He was also terrifyingly powerful Psyker, but refused to use his gift for the same reasons. He ceased this emo shit after falling to Chaos, turning into a bad ass sorcerer able to rival Magnus, or at least Magnus's psychic projection, which is still far beyond any 40k-level monster-Psyker capabilities. In fact he was the third or forth most powerful (once-Imperial) Psyker in the galaxy: second to only Big E, Magnus and maybe Malcador. (A couple of daemons and [[Eldrad|a certain dick]] might give him a run for his money as well if you consider non-humans.)

He also bore the greatest physical similarity to the Emperor: under his golden tattoos he looked exactly like a younger version of Big E's true form (yeah, yeah, da Emprah told Corax that he had no true form, but then he also said that daemons were minor xenos pests, so figure that out yourself). He has also dabbled in [[Meme|Trolling]] shown in one scene in ''Know No Fear'', where he's pretty much blatantly trolling Guilliman.

<blockquote>

Lorgar: ''Have you lost your temper, Roboute?''

Guilliman: ''I am going to gut you.''

Lorgar: ''You have lost your temper.''

</blockquote>

Take that BITCH.

His actions during the Heresy mainly consisted of keeping Angron on a slaughter path as well as saving his life. He repeatedly tried to get Magnus to join the traitors but realised that he was totally out of his depth in terms of warpcraft. Unfortunately, Lorgar turned out to be closer in mentality to Erebus than he would ever like to admit. When Horus was elevated by the gods on Molech, Lorgar grew frustrated about how Horus would not submit to Chaos and received a vision of his leadership leading to their defeat on Terra. When Horus was wounded by the Emperor's Spear, Lorgar sensed the opportunity to usurp him as Warmaster as well as High Priest of Arch-Chaos.

Suffice to say that it did not go to plan and a revived Horus curb-stomped him publicly in front of the entire massed traitor forces on Ullanor. He would have killed Lorgar but relented at the last minute, banishing him from his court and telling him that Lorgar would die if Horus ever saw him again (which turned out to be moot later but partly explained why Lorgar isolated himself from his brothers afterwards). A large portion of the Word Bearers legion swore themselves to Horus at that point and Lorgar warned the Warmaster that his refusal to submit to the Chaos Gods would lead to the traitors' defeat. One can only assume that following Horus' death that there was a lot of smug "I told you so"-ing on Lorgar's end.

==Post Heresy==
[[Image:Lorgar portrait.jpg|thumb|left|'''GREETINGS MEWLING CORPSE SLAVE, DO YOU HAVE A FEW MINUTES TO HEAR ABOUT THE GOOD WORD OF CHAOS UNDIVIDED?''']]
[[Image:Lorgar.jpg|200px|thumb|right|Note that his [[Galactic Partridges|purity seals have purity seals]] and his scalp is inscribed with holy scripture. Because if you are going to do it, you have to do it right.]]
So now he's the Daemon-Primarch of the [[Word Bearers]], the guys who make the rest of the Chaos Space Marines look like all around swell secular humanist types. They're kind of like Jehovah's Witnesses, except instead of knocking on your door and telling you about Jesus they knock down your door and ask you which end of a daemon summoning you want to be on. This tends to make Chaos' otherwise awful selling pitch seem oddly compelling. He also has a particular hatred for atheists, so he loathes his atheist daddy Emprah and the [[Tau|weeaboo space communists]] more than he hates everything else.

In a supreme twist of irony, the [[Ecclesiarchy]] of the Imperium (which is the primary target for the Word Bearers during conquest) derives most if not all of their religious texts from Lorgar. That Bible they administer to citizens daily? The prayers quadrillions of soldiers and civilians utter daily in an effort to believe? That devotion to the Emperor? All fostered and nurtured by Lorgar. All brought about by him and his Legion's sheer devotion. And all that shit works (Grey Knights are protected from Daemons by their faith while the latter fear holy water blessed by the Ecclesiarchy, Sisters of Battle pull out miracles and have (a) freakin' Living Saint(s) resurrected by the Emperor, etc), leading to countless jokes about it being Lorgar's plan all along. In short, Lorgar is responsible for both the Heresy that marked the end of the Imperium's golden age, and the only thing that would save Humanity in its long evolution to a fully psychic race. That being said, Lorgar is actually so ashamed of the Lectitio Divinitatus (the primary holy book of the Imperium he wrote) that bringing it up is a surefire way to have your body and soul obliterated in such horrific ways [[anal circumference|that no words exist in the myriad tongues of the universe to fully encompass the unholy rape you would receive]]. Seriously, just... don't. Now just imagine his face when he hears that [[Roboute_Guilliman|Gorillaman]] himself is slowly becoming convinced of the Emperor's divinity and is reading a copy of the Lectitio Divinitatus with Lorgar's autograph....

Since the Heresy, Lorgar's notable achievements consist of becoming a [[Daemon Prince]] of [[Chaos Undivided]] (and, yes, that is technically possible, and it was also the standard before GW decided to retcon) before doing sweet fuck all for several millennia. Seriously, at least while [[Magnus the Red|Magnus]] pretends to be plotting the downfall of Man or something while he sits in his tower screaming "[[JUST AS PLANNED]]" at the top of his lungs whenever he pours milk over his daemon cereal, he actually got off his red ass and led the [[Thousand Sons]] to wreck the [[Space Wolves]]' shit on their own home planet. ([[Fail|Twice.]]) Lorgar, though? The lazy fuckwit has just been holed up on Sicarus meditating and traversing the warp, secretly "Crying and weeping in guilt for what he has done" quote unquote by our [[Spiritual Liege|spiritual liege]] himself, [[Roboute Guilliman|Rawbutt Derpyman]]. Congratulations, [[Chaos Gods]], you have created the Lovecraftian equivalent of that unemployed asshole friend who won't get off your couch and who is secretly [[Cyrus|emo]]. If you believe Magnus, Lorgar has already achieved what the Chaos Gods wanted by setting up this stalemate between Chaos and the Imperium so he's entitled to some well-earned ruminating on scripture, but fuck that because it's boring. Also because it runs totally counter to the beliefs that Lorgar develops during ''The First Heretic'', which are all about mankind embracing Chaos and everyone becoming willingly possessed like his Gal Vorbak.

Apparently he was actually working on some new daemon summoning techniques, which he taught Abbadon before the Thirteenth Black Crusade. Which on the whole... is pathetic, that's like something they should be doing on their off hours when not busy slaughtering Imperial worlds. Given that Abbadon's the only other big player on the Chaos side who's still devoted to toppling the Imperium in the name of Chaos Undivided, you'd think Lorgar would be beside him every step of the way. The prevailing theory is that he's busy <strike>Indulging Slaanesh's churchboy fantasies</strike> "contemplating the mysteries of Chaos". Although if you want to be logical, (if logic could be applied to chaos or 40k in general) him being the daemon prince of chaos undivided means that he must execute the will of chaos undivided, which is, incidentally, divided, and as such, he can't do shit.

As of M42 where shit has most definitely hit the fan in the form of the Great Rift splitting the Galaxy in half, Lorgar has apparently been seen leading the Word Bearers on their Unholy Crusades. So looks like he's finally gotten off his lazy ass! However [[Corvus Corax]] is now consumed by the singular purpose of getting revenge on his traitorous brothers. Corax descended on Lorgar and spoiled his otherwise magnificent appearance after ten thousand years busy doing fucking nothing. Surprisingly the balance of power did not change between the two, and Lorgar, again, ran for his life, as his [[Konrad Curze|original backup]] seemed to be too busy being dead to help him again.

==On The Tabletop==
{| class=wikitable
! || Pts || WS || BS || S || T || W || I || A || Ld || Sv
|-
| '''Lorgar Aurelian:''' || 375 || 6 || 6 || 6 || 6 || 5 || 6 || 4 || 10 || 2+
|}
[[Image:Lorgar Aurelian.jpg|300px|thumb|right|Lorgar's model, the <s>first</s> second in [[Forge World]]'s Primarch line (Angron was first). Unfortunately, while very nice, it shows in his static pose and (relatively) standard design of power armour. This said, Lorgar's armor is noted in the First Heretic to be as plain as regular Mk3.]]
Lorgar may be the cheapest of the Primarchs, and he may have one the lowest statlines amongst them (aside from a decent initiative), but do not let this fool you - used properly he can be one of the most powerful Primarchs.

First off, he magnifies the strong points of his legion: Word Bearers are already quite brave with 3d6 morale tests (discarding the highest dice). Lorgar makes them all Ld10 (for Morale and Pinning tests, does not require LoS), and immune to Fear, effectively turning them into the bravest non-fearless army in 30k bar the [[Adeptus Custodes]] and [[Solar Auxilia]], but only if the squad sees him, i.e., has LoS. Hell, even in 40k none could rival their resolve (apart from Tyranids until you kill their synapse, or Deathwing Terminators). Word Bearers are quite good in melee with their compulsory psyker-chaplains, ability to re-roll 1s for sweeping advance and cheap melee-friendly squad-wide buffing through Dark Channeling; Lorgar enhances their close combat by granting +1 to charge distance and combat resolution (LoS needed). He also confers his crusader rule to any unit he joins, further increasing the chances of successful sweeping advances if they win in melee.

As for Lorgar himself, he wields ''Illuminarum'', a S8 AP2 MС [[Power Weapon|power maul]] with Smash; a MC S6 AP3 pistol for +1A and 2+/4++ armour which grants 3++ against ''any psychic empowered attacks (including witchfire powers and blows from Force Weapons)'', but against Witchfires is a bit redundant, because Lorgar would likely Deny any spell targeted at him with his rerollable DtW on 3+. He can also force one model or unit to reroll all 5-6 to hit and to wound against him once per game, which is obviously his "I win" button in challenges.

Lorgar's main strength is that he's a ML2 psyker with access to Divination and Telekinesis. Though he got a handicap, he can only harness warp charges on 5+ ''(amended for 7th edition by FAQ)'' this matters very little, because he can (and should) be upgraded to ML3, where he harnesses warp charges on 3+ and gains the freedom to pick powers manually at the start of the game instead of randomly rolling them. This is where he starts turning into rape machine, as both Divination and Telekinesis have quite a murderfuck set of powers normally compensated by the fact that there's only a small chance of getting the good ones. While losing access to Telepathy (and Invisibility by extension) in his revised rules is a bit of a setback since he can't cheese his way through most Primarch vs. Primarch fights like he used to, the variety of supporting powers that Divination provide are a fine compensation for that. Precognition seems to take the mantle of his "I win" button, making him both tougher and killier.

Assuming you take Lorgar ascended to pick your powers, tailor your needs to suit your opponent. Precognition, as previously mentioned, turns him into a challenge monster who gets to reroll all of the things. Objuration Mechanicum is another solid power, getting easy hull points off vehicle squadrons or making units kill themselves that rely on volume of fire to cause wounds in the shooting phase. Misfortune is particularly good against MEQ units to begin with and the ability to simply have it when you need it is equally good as a result. Should you sit Lorgar back with a heavy support squad full of high damage weapons, laugh at all the death inflicted from Perfect Timing denying cover saves (though that's a strange use of a 450 (when upgraded) point model). Really, your imagination is the limit and the ability to have the power that will benefit you the most against the army you're playing is worth the 75 point Lorgar upgrade, all day every day.

===Lorgar VS other Primarchs:===
<div class="toccolours mw-collapsible mw-collapsed" style="100%">
Primarch fighting, while fun to see isn't a very competitive thing to do as it'll usually tie up both Primarchs for the entire game without either of them dying (and Lorgar's abilities and statline mean he's much better suited to fighting marines where he can Instant Death them), with that in mind this section is how Lorgar fares against other Primarchs Mathhammer wise. Please note that all the various abilities, with the exception of Blind and Lorgar's powers, are taken into account (Blind is ignored because it never helps nor hinders the outcome of the fights, and psychic powers are too random to apply to this and don't work often enough to sway the fight) and the match-ups assume the Primarchs are the only ones involved in the fighting, so various abilities like Angron's "The Butcher's Nails" and Rampage do not provide any bonuses. Note too this mathhammer is only based on regular Lorgar.
<div class="mw-collapsible-content">

* Lorgar VS Horus (using The Talon)
**Round 1: Horus hits 3.444 times, wounds 1.775 times, 0.887 times after saves and IWND will take that down to 0.554 wounds at the start of the next turn.
**Round 2: Horus hits 4 times, wounds 3.554, 1.777 times after saves and IWND will take that down to 1.444 wounds at the start of the next turn.
**Lorgar hits Horus 3 times, wounds 2.5 times, 0.833 after saves and IWND will take that to 0.5 wounds at the start of the next turn.
**Lorgar loses this fight. BADLY.

* Lorgar VS Angron
**Round 1: Angron hits 4.888 times, wounds 3.846 times, 1.923 times after saves and IWND will take that down to 1.59 wounds at the start of the next turn.
**Round 2: Angron hits 4 times, wounds 3.333, 1.666 times after saves and IWND will take that down to 1.333 wounds at the start of the next turn.
**Lorgar hits Angron 3 times, wounds 2.5 times, 0.833 after saves and FNP and IWND will take that to 0.5 wounds at the start of the next turn.
**Lorgar loses this fight. BADLY.

*Lorgar VS Fulgrim
**Round 1 (Laer Blade): Fulgrim hits 4.147 times, wounds 1.726 times, 0.863 times after saves and IWND will take that down to 0.530 wounds at the start of the next turn.
**Round 2 (Laer Blade): Fulgrim hits 4.666 times, wounds 2.333 times, 1.166 times after saves and IWND will take that down to 0.833 wounds at the start of the next turn.
**Round 1 (FireBlade): Fulgrim hits 4.147 times, wounds 2.456 times, 1.228 times after saves and IWND will take that down to 0.895 wounds at the start of the next turn.
**Round 2 (FireBlade): Fulgrim hits 5.333 times, wounds 3.556 times, 1.778 times after saves and IWND will take that down to 1.444 wounds at the start of the next turn.
**Lorgar hits Fulgrim 3 times, wounds 2.5 times, 0.833 after saves and IWND will take that to 0.5 wounds at the start of the next turn.
**Lorgar loses this fight. BADLY.
**Note: If Fulgrim is concussed he loses a significant amount of damage, but even at his worst (Laer, no CoT and concussed) he matches Lorgar's output and will beat him one turn earlier.

* Lorgar VS Mortarion
**Round 1: Mortarion hits 2.961 times, wounds 1.752 times, 0.876 times after saves and IWND will take that down to 0.543 wounds at the start of the next turn.
**Round 2: Mortarion hits 3.333 times, wounds 2.222 times, 1.111 times after saves and IWND will take that down to 0.778 wounds at the start of the next turn.
**Lorgar hits Mortarion 3 times, wounds 2 times, 1 after saves and IWND will take that to 0.444 wounds at the start of the next turn.
**Lorgar loses this fight. BADLY.

* Lorgar VS Ferrus
**Round 1: Ferrus hits 2.37 times, wounds 1.865 times (Forgebreaker)/1.58 times (Bare Hands), 0.932 times after saves (Forgebreaker)/0.79 times (Bare Hands) after saves and IWND will take that down to 0.599/0.457 wounds at the start of the next turn.
**Round 2: Ferrus hits 2.666 times, wounds 2.221 times (Forgebreaker)/1.777 times (Bare Hands), 1.11 times after saves (Forgebreaker)/0.888 times (Bare Hands) after saves and IWND will take that down to 0.777/0.555 wounds at the start of the next turn.
**Lorgar hits 3 times, wounds 2 times, 0.667 wounds after saves and IWND will take that down to 0.333 wounds at the start of the next turn.
**Lorgar loses this fight. BADLY.

* Lorgar VS Konrad Curze
**Round 1: Curze hits 3.555 times, wounds 2.369 times, 1.184 times after saves and IWND will take that down to 0.851 wounds at the start of the next turn.
**Round 2: Curze hits 4 times, wounds 3 times, 1.5 times after saves and IWND will take that down to 1.167 wounds at the start of the next turn.
**Lorgar hits 3 times, wounds 2.5 times, 1.25 wounds after saves and IWND will take that down to 0.917 wounds at the start of the next turn.
**Lorgar loses this fight. BADLY.

* Lorgar VS Vulkan
**Round 1: Vulkan hits 2.37 times, wounds 1.865 times, 0.932 times after saves and IWND will take that down to 0.599 wounds at the start of the next turn.
**Round 2: Vulkan hits 2.666 times, wounds 2.221 times, 1.11 times after saves and IWND will take that down to 0.777 wounds at the start of the next turn.
**Lorgar hits 3 times, wounds 2 times, 0.667 wounds after saves and 0.111 wounds after IWND.
**Lorgar loses this fight. BADLY.

* Lorgar VS Perturabo
**Round 1: Perturabo hits 2.37 times (both types), wounds 1.58 times (Normal)/1.865 times (Forgebreaker), 0.79 wounds (Normal)/0.932 wounds (Forgebreaker) after saves and IWND will take that down to 0.457/0.599 wounds at the start of the next turn.
**Round 2: Perturabo hits 2.666 times (both types), wounds 1.777 times (Normal)/2.221 times (Forgebreaker), 0.888 wounds (Normal)/1.11 wounds (Forgebreaker) after saves and IWND will take that down to 0.555/0.777 wounds at the start of the next turn.
**Lorgar hits 3 times, wounds 2.5 times, 0.833 wounds after saves and 0.5 wounds after IWND.
**Lorgar loses this fight. With Forgebreaker, BADLY.

* Lorgar VS Roboute Guilliman
**Lorgar hits 3 times, wounds 2.5 times, 1 times after saves and reroll and IWND will take that down to 0.667.
**Guilliman Round 1: hits 2.778 times, wounds 1.85 times, 0.926 times after saves and IWND will take that down to 0.593 wounds at the start of the next turn.
**Guilliman Round 2 and thereafter: hits 3.333 times, wounds 2.963 times, 1.48 times after saves and IWND will take that down to 1.15 wounds at the start of the next turn.
**Lorgar loses this fight. BADLY.

* Lorgar VS Rogal Dorn
**Round 1: Rogal Dorn hits 2.37 times (Normal)/1.259 times (Sundering Blow), wounds 1.579 times (normal)/1.164 times (Sundering Blow), 0.789/0.582 wounds after saves and IWND will take that down to 0.456/0.249 wounds at the start of the next turn.
**Round 2: Rogal Dorn hits 2.666 times (Normal)/1.333 times (Sundering Blow), wounds 2 times (normal)/1.295 times (Sundering Blow), 1/0.648 wounds after saves and IWND will take that down to 0.667/0.315 wounds at the start of the next turn.
**Lorgar hits 3 times, wounds 2 times, 1 times after saves and IWND will take that down to 0.667 wounds at the start of the next turn.
**A close fight! It depends on who rolls IWND first - if Dorn does, he has a very good chance of beating Lorgar in 6 rounds (4.98 wounds), but if he doesn't Lorgar will Concuss him and win next turn by striking first. If Lorgar starts first, the odds shift further in his favor.

* Lorgar VS Corvus Corax
**Round 1: Corvus hits 4.741 times (Scourge)/3.555 times (Shadow-walk), wounds 3.16 times (Scourge)/2.369 times (Shadow-walk), 1.58 wounds (Scourge)/1.184 wounds (Shadow-walk) after saves and IWND will take that down to 1.247/0.851 wounds at the start of the next turn.
**Round 2: Corvus hits 5.333 times (Scourge)/4 times (Shadow-walk), wounds 3.999 times (Scourge)/3 times (Shadow-walk), 1.999 wounds (Scourge)/1.5 wounds (Shadow-walk) after saves and IWND will take that down to 1.666/1.167 wounds at the start of the next turn.
**Lorgar hits 3/2 times, wounds 2.5/1.667 times, 1.667/1.111 wounds after saves and IWND will take that down to 1.333/0.778 wounds at the start of the next turn.
**Lorgar loses this fight. BADLY.

*Lorgar VS Leman Russ
** The weakest Primarch stats-wise vs. the one built up from the ground to demolish his brothers in 1v1 fights, do you really need the maths here? With his upgraded psyker powers Lorgar does at least put up a fight before going down, but without them he gets [[rape|wrecked]]. BADLY.

* Lorgar VS Jaghatai Khan
**Jaghatai hits 5.333 times, wounds 2.666 times, 1.333 wounds after saves and IWND will take that down to 1
**Lorgar hits 3 times, wounds 2 times, 0.667 after saves and IWND will take that to 0.333 wounds at the start of the next turn.
**Lorgar loses BADLY.

* Lorgar VS Sanguinius
** Lorgar hits 3 times, wounds 2.5 times, 1.25 wounds after saves and IWND will take that down to 0.917 wounds at the start of the next turn.
** Sanguinius Round 1: hits 3.889 times (assuming Lorgar uses Dark Fortune), wounds 2.881 times, 1.44 wounds after saves and IWND will take that down to 1.107 wounds at the start of the next turn.
*** Sanguinius on the charge: hits 4.444 times (assuming Lorgar uses Dark Fortune), wounds 3.959 times (including HoW), 1.979 wounds after saves and IWND will take that down to 1.646 wounds at the start of the next turn.
** Sanguinius Round 2+: hits 4 times, wounds 3.556 times, 1.778 wounds after saves and IWND will take that down to 1.444 wounds at the start of the next turn.
** Lorgar loses BADLY.

* Lorgar VS Alpharius
**Alpharius round 1: hits 3.333 times, wounds 1.9444 times, 0.972 wounds after saves and IWND will take that down to 0.639 wounds at the start of the next turn.
**Alpharius round 2: hits 3.889 times, wounds 2.268 times, 1.134 wounds after saves and IWND will take that down to 0.801 wounds at the start of the next turn.
**Lorgar hits 3 times, wounds 2.5 times, 1.25 times after saves and IWND will take that down to 0.917 wounds at the start of the next turn.
**Lorgar wins thanks to Concussive!

* Lorgar VS Magnus
** Magnus (round 1): hits 2.222 times, wounds 1.728 times and 0.576 after saves which IWND will take down to 0.242 wounds at the start of next turn
** Magnus: hits 2.667 times, wounds 2.222 times and 0.741 after saves which IWND will take down to 0.407 wounds at the start of next turn
** Lorgar: hits 2 times, wounds 1.667 times and 0.833 after saves which IWND will take down to 0.5 wounds at the start of the next turn
** Lorgar's save is increased to 3++ against attacks from Force Weapons, giving him a mutual kill or narrowly win if he concusses Magnus in the penultimate round.
*** '''Happy psychic fun:'''
*** Magnus with Iron Arm and Warp Speed: hits 4.667 times, wounds 3.889 times, [[FAIL|0.432 after saves]] and IWND will take down to 0.099 wounds at the start of next turn
*** Lorgar with Precog: hits 2.778 times, wounds 1.543 times, 0.772 times after saves and IWND will take down to 0.439 wounds at the start of the next turn
*** Lorgar with Precog crushes Magnus (after a long time), the rerolls to hit and wound more than makes up for Magnus' aura and boosted Toughness, and [[Shield-Captain|rerollable 3++]] neuters Magnus' damage. Magnus needs Iron Arm, Warp Speed ''and'' Endurance to outlast him. Or roll Precognition himself with any Bio-blessing (although the chance he gets everything he needs and passes every test without any of them being denied is incredibly low, making it more likely Lorgar would win than not).

'''TLDR version:''' The weakest Primarch? Maybe, if you don't consider his psychic powers. But if you do...?
Dirty Trick: Upgrade Lorgar to Lorgar Transfigured and give him Precognition. With this he will beat any other Primarch barring Horus (and a maxed out Angron), and even the Warmaster will be hard pressed in this fight, he can also outright cheat in this fight either by summoning Deamons to assist him (which allows him to beat everyone) or he can get possessed so a Daemon can take revenge for him when he's on his last wound.

</div>
</div>

{{Primarchs}}
{{Daemons-Characters}}
[[Category:Chaos]]
[[Category:Word Bearers]]

Bomma

2020-10-15T08:22:44Z

2A02:1811:5180:A200:EC3D:29FD:FA1D:618: /* Bommer Fortress */

[[Ork]] Bommas or Bommers are an entire family of aircraft dedicated in blowing those puny gitz to smithereens. Bommas come in all shapes and sizes but they all excel at their job. They are not to be confused with the [[Fighta-Bommer]] which is more of a multi-role aircraft than a dedicated Bommer. The list of Bommas include the Blitza-Bommer, Burna-Bommer, Heavy Bommer, Blasta Bommer.

==Blitza-Bommer==
[[File:GWBlitza_Bomber.jpg|200px|right|thumb|<span style='color:green;font-size:100%'>BANZAIIII!</span>]]
The Blitza-Bommer (AKA Accidental Kamikaze) is an Ork dive bomber suitable for the bravest and most mentally unhinged/unstable of Flyboys. These aircrafts 'aim' their bombs by diving at the target, releasing their [[Grenades_&_Explosives#Boom_Bomb|Boom Bomb]] at the very last moment possible which is something that tends to panic the onboard [[Grot]] Gunner. They often perform 'Blitz' runs where an entire squadron of these guys start peppering a targeted enemy with a barrage of bombs, hence their name.

Like every Ork mentality, you go much faster when plummeting downwards and if you paint it red you go even faster. [[Fail|Some Orks completely forget to pull out of their dive and end up smashing into the ground.]] Once they've blown everything up (hopefully themselves not included) then there's a pair of supa shootas ready to mop up any stray or squishy targets.

Blitza-Bommers are typically armed with a pair of [[Shootas'an_Dakkas#Supa_Shoota|Supa Shootas]] and a Grot-manned [[Shootas'an_Dakkas#Big_Shoota|Big Shoota]]. Their payload consists of a pair of Boom Bombs, a heavy type of high-explosive bomb.

In 8th Edition Blitza-Bommers had their payloads tweaked for more anti-vehicle punch. Its guns are still anti-infantry (with the Grot Gunner giving it a +1 to hit with the Big Shoota), but its Boom Bombs count VEHICLES and MONSTERS as three models when working out how many dice they get to roll for mortal wounds - and they inflict mortal wounds to all targets on 4s (capped at no more than 12 dice rolled per bomb), while Burna-Bommers' Burna Bombs require 5s for non-INFANTRY. At 133 points Blitza-bombers are relatively cheap, but once the bombs are dropped they might be left without much to do since they only have 3 secondary guns.

Bomb large squadrons of smaller vehicles such as [[Vyper]]s for maximum pain.

==Burna-Bommer==
[[File:Burna_Bommer_WD.JPG|200px|right|thumb|Some Orks just want to watch the world burn.]]

For some Flyboyz, guns might not be as fun as fire. Orks ''love'' fire and it was therefore inevitable that someday a [[Mekboy|Mek]] would think of attaching canisters of volatile [[Promethium]] to the underside of an Ork Bommer, thus the Burna-Bommer was born. And like their Blitza-Bommer cousins, this aircraft performs its attack runs at as low an altitude as possible. Such a technique is, predictably, filled with potential [[Fail]].

Burna-Bommers usually feature a twin-linked Supa Shoota and a Grot-manned defence turret, armed with a [[Combi-weapon#Twin-Linked_Shoota|twin-linked Big Shoota]]. Their payload includes two [[Grenades_&_Explosives#Burna_Bomb|Burna Bombs]] and up to six incendiary [[Missile_Launcher#Skorcha_Missile|Skorcha Missiles]].

In 8th Edition Burna-Bommers have respectable anti-infantry firepower and, with the bombs, deal mortal wounds too. You get two Burna Bombs, and can drop one per turn on a unit you fly over. You roll a D6 for every model in the unit they drop on (capped at 10), inflicting a mortal wound for every roll of 5+, or 4+ vs INFANTRY. The twin Supa Shootas can still pump out some [[Dakka]], while The Twin Big Shoota gets +1 to hit thanks to its Grot Gunner. The Skorcha missiles, if equipped, no longer track ammo: instead they are an Assault D6 weapon with a 24" range that are S5 and AP-1, and ignore cover saves. At only 5 points, there's no reason not to take them; a Burna-Bommer equipped this way comes in at only 137 points.

Try to make sure the Bommer is over the enemy when it gets shot down, as the 3 mortal wounds from its 4+ Explosive Demise will be very unpleasant for anyone within 6". Ideally, you should maximize your bomb drops by focusing on high-value infantry targets such as full-strength squads of [[MEQ]]s. Against [[GEQ]]s you're better off bringing a [[Dakkajet]].

==Heavy Bommer==
[[File:HeavyBommer-4.jpg|220px|right|thumb|Heavy Bomma, more aerodynamic than half of the Imperial planes.]]

As their name implies, Heavy Bommers are one of the largest available Bommers in use of the Orks built for sustained heavy bombardment. Due to their size, Heavy Bommers can carry a much bigger payload then their smaller cousins. They are also far more noisier, which complements the Orkish aerial bombardment doctrine of BIG BADDA BOOM! The main problem with Heavy Bommers is [[What|there aren't many Orks willing to pilot them]], either because the controls are unusually small or the cockpit is cramped. Combine these factors with the universal Ork instinct to fight face-to-face, most of the crews inevitably consist of Gretchin.

Sometimes of course, the bombs malfunction and accidentally blow up ''inside'' the Bommer creating a spectacular fireball of [[Fail]].

In 7th Edition of [[Imperial Armour Volume 8]], Heavy Bommers are like the Fighta-Bommers only bigger and slower with more dakka and ordnance. Enough defensive weaponry is on this thing to see off waves of interceptor aircraft, while it carries enough ordnance weapons to pretty much wipe out an entire formation on turn one. Just one of these can spit out enough [[Missile_Launcher#Supa-Rokkits|supa-rokkits]] to wipe a [[Leman_Russ_Battle_Tank|Leman Russ]] company off the gameboard or drop enough [[Missile_Launcher#Grot_Bomms|grot-bombs]] to turn six full sized [[Hormagaunt|'Gaunt]] Broods into a few scattered bugs led by a lonely [[Hive Tyrant]] who will be blown apart by your [[Lootas]] next turn. It also comes with eight (8!) Big Shootas mounted along the flanks, which can shoot at different targets.

Now they have a shiny new model (in AT scale) with the release of [[Aeronautica Imperialis]]!

Since the [[Forge World]] 40k-scale Ork Bommer was only in production for about a minute, let's hope that Ork players see a plastic version of this beast (and its variants) in a future Orktober.

==Blasta Bommer==
[[File:BlastaBommer-6.jpg|220px|right|thumb|Blasta Bomma, it has both [[Dakka]] and Explosions!]]

A sub-category of Heavy Bommers, called Blasta Bommers, are completely retrofitted with nothing but guns and sent out to, predictably, *blast* the enemy to bits with hot lead. The Blasta Bommers are meant for executing low-flying ground attacks, and therefore they are armed with a plethora of Shootas, [[Zzap_Weapons#Zzap_Gun|Zzap guns]], and Rokkits. Of course this means that they have to sacrifice space normally designated for their bomb payloads in order to store ammunition and add mounting points for their plethora of gunz. In real life, dedicated light and medium bomber aircraft were actually converted into gun-laden assault planes. These are known as Attack aircraft, though the Blasta Bommer combines this concept with that of the Flying Fortress by mounting a number of independent machine guns along its flanks.

Apparently the (in)famous Ork philosopher and mekboy supreme [[Orkimedes]] was inspired by Imperial [[Marauder Bomber|Marauders]] and came up with idea for the Blasta Bommer during the Third War for Armageddon. Most Imperial authorities would consider this flattering, but the [[Mechanicus|AdMech]] would have a collective seizure (brimming with [[Rage]] and screaming about [[Heresy|tech-heresy]]) if you dare tell them that a filthy xeno has vandalized the concept of one of their vehicles.

In 7th Edition of Imperial Armour 8, the Blasta Bommer is very much like the Marauder variant for Imperials, instead of bombs and ordinance this thing carries lots of heavy guns for ground attack. Think of this as an Orky A-10 Warthog (the Orkiest of all airplanes). It can crank out a hilarious amount of Shoota, Zzap Gun, and Rokkit hits to mow down large numbers of enemies, while having the range to buzz around, loitering out of reach of the enemy's guns. The lack of Blast weapons means this is more suited for destroying a few hard targets over obliterating large formations, playing counterpart to the traditional Bomma. However, it is the death of Titans, MEQs, and any vehicle anywhere. Just think of it in terms of it's gun: 120" Range, Str 9, Ap 3, Heavy 3D6, plus D3 Supa Rokkits.

==Grot Bommer==
[[File:Grot_Bommer.jpg|200px|right|thumb|A Bomma launching its fleet of Orkified MXY-7 Ohkas.]]
A new variant of the Eavy Bommer found in the Battle for Rynn's World supplement for Aeronautica Imperialis.

Essentially the airborne equivalent to the [[Grot Bomm Launcha]]. The dangerous job of pushing bomms out of the hangar of an Eavy Bommer is usually left to the [[Grot|grots.]] As a result, the little gits develop a burning desire to pilot their own speeding aircraft and this lead to the creation of Grot Bommers. These Bommers are smaller than the conventional Bomma, and are therefore usually deployed from larger Ork aircraft; their speed, combined with the Grot pilot's desperation to engage with the enemy, makes them the perfect homing missile.

These souped up flyers shoot Grot Bomms and have a larger transport capacity than the standard Eavy Bommer. Unlike conventional guided missiles, the Grot Bomm is made using the finest Orky kno-wotz and rather than using complex augur arrays or machine spirits the Orks just strap a very eager grot inside. The grots enjoy their five minutes of flying before they inevitably crash into something with a massive explosion.

Most never make it to their intended target as their limited fuel supply [[Fail|runs out all too soon.]] However the ones that do reach enemy aircraft cause horrific damage. If there is an operation that needs more tactical finesse rather than blowing shit up, the Grot Bommer could also utilize rokkit pack-equipped [[Stormboyz]] for the operation.

{{clear}}

==Mega Bommer==
[[File:NPOaYrK9vHebkkgh.jpg|200px|right|thumb|The <s>de Havilland Vampire</s> <s>B-17 Bomber</s> Flying Fortress Supreme!]]
The Mega Bommer is a new and ECKS BAWKS HUEG Bomma released in Aeronautica on September 15, 2020. These are large Ork fortress-like bommers, used for heavy bombardment.

These aircraft are larger than even Heavy Bommers save for the one in Deff Skwadron below, and are the end result of obsessed [[Mekboy|Mekboys]] competing to create the biggest aircraft with lots of firepower. The Mega Bommers are exceptionally hard to take down and are loaded to the rafters with weapons, that cover every angle of the aircraft. This includes a full Flak Cannon Battery, every bit as deadly as the ground-based version, and up to 5 Mega Bombs, which are the Orks' final word in indiscriminate destruction.

This flying fortress relies on loads of guns to cover every angle and the remarkable durability of 10(!) Structure. Moreover, the Mega Bomb it carries is a full 10 Firepower, causing damage on a 2+, with extra damage on a 4 or better. Likewise, you can take up to four additional big bombs, AND two extra pairs of rokkits for good measure.

It also looks like a giant de Havilland Vampire. Which is [[Awesome]].

*'''Length:''' 20-24m; approx
*'''Wingspan:''' 24-28m; approx
*'''Crew:''' 20-25; approx

<gallery>
Xbnl4sCE7LbXMgwE.jpg
</gallery>

== Bommer Fortress ==

{{Awesome}}
[[File:Deff_Skwadron_Megabommer.jpg|300px|right|thumb|Here's a challenge. Try and count how many guns are on that ''thing''.]]

{{Topquote|Flamin Mork Boss. It's...it's...Zog me it's '''Bootiful'''!|Wise words said from Ugzob, or any Ork that stares at this majesty.}}
An absolutely hilarious aircraft shown only in [[Deff Skwadron]].

First appearing in '''Da Sekret Weapon'''. The Bommer Fortress is a ginormous aircraft that is more appropriate to be called ''airship''. In the graphic novel; at his Mekboys' testing ground, Warboss Badthug enlists Uzgob and his Deff Skwadron for a special mission, using a secret new super-heavy bomber airkraft to bomb Warboss Grimlug's base.

With the ship's cannon-operators given an order to effectively shoot anything that moves, the giant bomber reaches Grimlug's base in one piece. As they prepare to drop a secret payload, the hangar-bay doors won't open, requiring a Killboy to run there and open them manually; successfully releasing the [[Lulz|doors, Killboy and a metric shit load of hungry Squigs descend down to Grimlug's base, devastating it.]]

*'''Length:''' 100-150m; approx
*'''Wingspan:''' 150-200m; approx

[[Category: Warhammer 40,000]]

[[Category: Xenos]]

[[Category: Orks]]

[[Category: Dred Mob]]

[[Category: Grots]]

[[Category: Vehicles]]

[[Category: Flyers]]

{{Template:Orks-Forces}}

{{40k-Ork-Ships}}

Commissar

2020-09-08T18:41:22Z

2A02:1811:5180:A200:EC3D:29FD:FA1D:618: Undo revision 694946 by Arvax (talk)

[[Image:Comissar.png|frame|{{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*'''}}]]
{{Awesome}}
''But sir -- !<br>
{{BLAM|''*click* '''*BLAM!*''' If you will not serve in combat, then you will serve on the firing line!}}<br>
''-- but....your....zipper, sir... it's open...<br>
{{BLAM|''*click* '''*BLAM!*''' Looking at my groin is Slaaneshi worship! <strike>And that's good!</strike> ''*click* '''*BLAM!*''' No! That's HERESY! Who let that damn cultist infiltrate the Commissariat?}}<br>
{{Topquote|{{BLAM|How many Guardsmen does it take to unload a gun? Lets find out shall we? '''*BLAM!*'''}}| A Commissar with a twitchy finger}}

{{Topquote|I am not afraid of an army of lions led by a sheep; I am afraid of an army of sheep led by a lion.|Alexander the Great}}
{{Topquote|Kerls, wollt ihr ewig leben? - Rascals, do you want to live eternally?|Frederick II of Prussia, to his reluctant-to-attack soldiers, battle of Kolin}}
{{Topquote|Last one to die's an Eldar!|A Commissar}}
{{Topquote|You're going back to the front lines and you may get shot and killed, but you're going to fight. If you don't, I'll stand you up against a wall and have a firing squad kill you on purpose. In fact, I ought to shoot you myself, you goddamned whimpering coward.|George S. Patton to a shell-shocked soldier in the hospital, noteable: This didn't work and he was made to apolgize, because he was in World War II, not Warhammer 40K.}}

In the times long before these dark hours of the forty-first millennium, commanders of various Terran military entities and their successors in the colonial states of galactic expansionism remained in relative safety throughout the duration of various conflicts instead of charging the lines of their enemies with vitriol and froth issuing from their mouths in equal rabid measure. The instruments of the will of higher officers on the battlefield were men of inflexible will and intolerable zealotry, men greatly respected and feared by their underlings who inspired entire battalions with selfless example and were willing to sacrifice themselves for the success of their company and their empire. These times, while flawed, <s>were much better, more efficient and, perhaps, possessing greater sanity than this current era of strife.</s> {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!* HERESY!'''}} Regardless, these times have long passed.

In this current moment of the history of man, war has become a very different thing. Lasguns firing, explosives detonating, great beasts of unimaginable terror charging the trenches without fear, death of all sorts stalking behind every wisp of smoke... and that's just at the front. Behind every line of trembling conscripts is a man, sanctimonious, who fires not upon the hordes of the enemy, but his own troops.

That man is the '''Commissar'''.

They get a cool [[hats|hat]], a [[Nazi]]-esque longcoat, a sword or power fist they seem all too happy to hit the enemy with and their iconic bolt pistol which they use to "boost" the morale of their men, although they sometimes trade it for las or plasma pistols (but seeing your buddy's head explode or melt down does indeed motivate you better than just seeing a laser beam go through it). In reality however they're nothing more than a couple of faggots who overcompensate for their lack of fighting skill by executing their men to look tou{{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*'''}}. It's a well known fact that most of their morale enhancement (Unless they're [[Commissar Gaunt]], [[Ciaphas Cain]], or [[Commissar Yarrick]].) consists of being scary merciless bastards to rival the enemy merciless bast- {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*'''}}.

A Commissar that lacks any guardsmen to execute and is in the proximity of any vehicle proceeds to clamber on the said vehicle and threaten the crew into charging the enemy so he can hit the enemy with his close combat weapon. Hilarity ensues depending on the kind of closest vehicle, close combat weapon and closest enemy.

Commissars also have a tendency to get killed suspiciously far from the front lines. Fucking [[Catachan]] heretics... And yet, I cannot help but applaud the Catachans! You've got my support, Jungle Bo <s>{{BLAM|'''*BLAM!* HERESY!'''}}</s> '''BOOM!! FRAGGED!!!''' Such a tragedy. Our platoon's dear Commissar tripped on his own grenade, while in the latrines. Oh well, such is life fighting in the Emperor's name. Hopefully his replacement will learn well from such an unfortunate accident.

They also have mad shooting skills, some can even execute '''ENTIRE SQUADS OF COWARDS''' in the time it takes to drop their hats. If only they could shoot the enemies that fast, what with their phenomenal accuracy when shooting their own men and all.

<s>'''THEY'RE SONS OF BITCHES!'''</s> {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!* HERESY!'''}} <s>YOU SEE HE SHOT ME, WHAT AN ASSHOLE!</s> {{BLAM|'''QUIET, HERETIC! *BLAM*'''}} <s>I'm not dead!</s> {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!-BLAM!* DOUBLE HERESY! ONLY CHAOS INFESTED HERETICS REFUSE TO DIE FOR THEIR COMMISSARS'''}} <s>I FEEL FINE!</s>{{BLAM|'''*BLAM!-BLAM!-BLAM!-BLAM!-BLAM!-BLAM!*'''}} <s>I don't want to go on the cart!</s> {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!* SHUT THE FUCK UP!!!'''}} <s>[[Necrons|I'll be back!]]</s> <b>[[Avenger Strike Fighter|BRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRTTTTTT!!!!]]</b>

They are preceded with Discipline Masters in Great Crusade era.

==On a more serious note==
Beyond their reputation as [[Khârn|team-killing fuckheads]], the presence of Commissars make a lot of sense in the Imperial Guard. Copy-pasted straight from Civil War Soviet real world Commissars (save for the uniform) with a dash of Great War-era "charge the enemy or I'll execute you" British Army officer thrown in, they're political officers with everything that entails.

First of all, they are the warrants of doctrine. They will deal with any disciplinary issue coming up whenever a Guardsman misbehaves. The punishment for cowardice and desertion is death and the Commissar will apply the sentence on the spot, but that is only the tip of the iceberg. As a Guard regiment travels around the Imperium, they will come in contact with other cultures and ideas. Ideas that could potentially be dangerous and morale-ruining (looking at you [[Tau]] propaganda, but not only). Just like their real-world counterparts made sure random Ivan remained true to the ideals of communism, the Imperial Commissar will ensure such heretical ideas are suppressed and the regiment remains loyal to the Imperium and fit for duty. Where to the simple Guardsman this translates into being constantly watched by a terrifying enforcer of discipline that does not hesitate to shoot a deserter on the spot, to the higher echelons of the Guard they're a (frankly necessary) constant reminder they're supposed to do their job as defined by [[High Lords of Terra|the old coots back home]] and not go rogue to seize a planet for their own or carve out their own little kingdom. Yeah, it takes a lot to become a Commissar, tactical and strategic training included: after all, they have to judge the competence of everyone, up to and including Lords Solar.

A second part of their job is to ensure cooperation between elements of the Guard. You see, the Imperium is vast. Extremely vast. And only very loosely unified as a whole. Hence what is considered quite normal on one world would have denizens from another throw a massive bitchfit, if not worse. Imagine the result of stuck-up [[Mordian Iron Guard]]s in the same room as rowdy [[Catachan Jungle Fighters]] unsupervised, you'll get the idea. Commissars make sure discipline is maintained and rules are adhered to (by force of arms if necessary), no matter the origin of the warriors under their care.

The third part is military counseling. Officially, a Commissar is outside the chain of command and can only advise on military matters, the ultimate decision remaining in the hands of the commanding officer. But, as mentioned, they also have the authority to execute any soldier if they conclude they're severely derelict in the prosecution of their duties (this includes high ranking officers, as both [[Colonel-Commissar Ibram Gaunt|Ibram Gaunt]] and Viktor Hark have demonstrated). This means that Commissars will most of the time stay close to the action and lead by example and that people will listen to what they have to say (and almost always agree outright) for fear of {{BLAM}}. One of the core tenets of the [[Imperial Creed]] is [[Humanity Fuck Yeah|Mankind's right to be the sole owners of the Galaxy]], and the Commissar is always ready to personally prove it to any [[Harlequin|particular]] [[Exodite|breed]] [[Eldar Corsairs|of]] [[Eldar|Space]] [[Dark Eldar|Elf]], [[Ork]], [[Necron]], [[Tyranid|space bug]] or whoever was stupid enough to question Mankind's right to rule the stars with their existence that day. (They're helped by often being the most well-equipped and hardest motherfuckers in the squad.)

Should it come to pass that the leader of a squad or regiment has fallen (one way or another, either due to the enemy or {{BLAM}}), the Commissar will assume command himself. Most Guardsmen dread when this happens for this all too often results in a <strike>pointless last stand for anyone involved</strike> {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!* HERESY! No death in the Emperor's name is pointless!'''}}; anyone attempting to retreat being helped to a bolter shell to the back of the head for cowardice. This is often all too true, but the Commissar has no choice: he simply cannot flee or order a retreat as he's well aware this would be the surest way for morale to collapse immediately, especially if he just executed the commanding officer. The inverse is also true, if a commander refuses to retreat when it would serve the emperor and save his currency to do so he can take command then. In many cases the situation has already gone so FUBAR when he assumes command that standing his ground and taking as many enemies of the Emperor with him as he can is the only meaningful choice left to him and the men close to him; [[Fist of the North Star|for they are already dead]]. This said, it is not always a bad thing when it happens. [[awesome|The most famous example]], of course, is [[Commissar Yarrick]] assuming command of the defense of [[Armageddon]]; whose undaunted contest of Hades hive made [[Ghazghkull Thraka]] lose sight of the larger battle because he couldn't see it as anything but a personal challenge and answered in kind, leaving the flanks of his hordes wide open for the Imperial counter-attack.

Last but not least, the Commissars are also trained to look out for xenos or chaotic taint. Not all enemies of the Imperium [[Ork|conveniently charge at the Guard straight on]] but use much more insidious methods. So the Commissars are taught a little bit (just what is needed) about Chaos, [[Genestealer Cult|Genestealers]], Enslavers and all those kind of joyful things that could fuck over their regiment and how to look out for it, with the strict instruction to {{Blam}} anything they find out on sight. Any [[psyker]] in their regiment will be under their constant scrutiny because where Average Joe just has a vague knowledge he should 'abhor the witch', the Commissar know what would happen if he would get [[Daemonhost|possessed]]. Better safe than sorry.

With the above in mind, you easily understand why Commissars are at best tolerated and often hated with a passion by the men under their care. They are hard and pitiless men, but that is a sad necessity in the [[grimdark|just as hard and pitiless 40k universe where the alternative is even worse]]. It should also be noted, that not all Commissars are trigger-happy fucknuts. The intelligent ones that live long lives learn that the right words can often inspire men just as well, if not better, than a bolt to the head. These Commissars learn to tell the difference in situations. After all, the Commissars first job is to inspire the troops, through whichever means are most appropriate. Of course, the trigger-happy fucknuts do tend to spoil the bunch for the good ones.

==Choices of equipment==
*Badass longcoat, badass sash and even more badass hat straight out of Hugo Boss during the Nazi era.
*Mars-Pattern ceramite balls
*Flak armour- Standard guardsman issue Commissar armoured underwear.
*Carapace armor & Refractor field- A better armour and a force field for genre-savvy Lord Commissar.
*Camo-cloak. Serves to hide said badass garments and get less fire from the enemy and guardsmen.
*Special Mask for a Lord that weeps tears of blood near traitors! Oh and scares people. Also gives a force field.
*(Other) Special Mask for Commissars lucky enough to get the Death Korps of Krieg (easiest gig in the guard cuz Kriegers commissar themselves)

*Saber- Often carried to swing towards enemies while riding a Leman Russ tank so that he could drive closer and hit enemies with his sword.
**[[Chainsword]]- For a sword that's actually useful more often than not.
**[[Power weapon|Power sword or power axe]]- For slaying armored enemies and hassle-free decapitations.
**Power fist- For punching through enemy [[METAL_BOXES|Metal Bawkses]].

*[[Laspistol]]- Clean, precise, and efficient working tool of the Commissar that doesn't waste ammunition. Less satisfying to execute people with though. The Imperial Infantryman’s Uplifting Primer recommend it however as the laser beam will cauterize the wound it makes, keeping your uniform spring clean despite your executions. This is noted to be the favored pistol of choice for the vast majority of commissar's featured in the Dawn of War series.
*Bolt pistol- Produces very satisfying {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*'''}}ming sound that raises self-esteem of the worthless ponce hold-{{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*'''}}, can also get through standard issue Imperial flak armor if you need to blam someone in the chest on the battle field.
*[[Bolter]]- Good for shooting underarmoured enemies and your entire squad if you suspect them all of {{BLAM|HERESY}}.
*[[Plasma|Plasma pistol]]- Good for shooting armoured enemies dead, and executing cowardly tanks. Bad for summary executions since it's poor form for it to over heat when trying to "inspire" your squad.
*Baleful Eye- [[Commissar Yarrick|Lasgun built in the eye socket to kill Orks with a glare]].
*Grenades & bombs.
*Titanium balls.
*Two pairs of balls, (see above)

==Reasonable Commissars==
Reasonable Commissars do not execute those who flee. However, they do carry a potent stun-gun to bring down those who break ranks and save the bolter shells for those who have willingly became servants of Chaos or Xenos. Afterwards, the accused is brought before a military tribunal to judge what the appropriate punishment will be. Reasonably Hard Labor is a common punishment. If a not-so-reasonable Commissar is present the punishment is invariably a {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*'''}}-ing. The bast- {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*'''}}

Reasonable Commissars can often be found in units operating alongside [[Reasonable Marines]].

Reasonable Commissars understand their duty is to instill courage within the Imperial Guard, not to instill discord and discontent. Thus they lead by example and be the first to die and last to retreat.

Reasonable Commissars only exist because there are Commissars who are *ahem* ''dicks''...such as Commissar Jericho of the 8th Cadian Whiteshield division:

{{topquote|Lil' Timmy: "Commissar? My helmet won't fit. Can you please help me fasten it?"<br>Jericho: "IF YOU CANNOT FASTEN YOUR OWN HELMET, YOU'RE AN INEFFECTIVE SOLDIER! AN INEFFECTIVE SOLDIER IS THE SAME AS A HERETIC IN MY BOOK! SUMMARY EXECUTION FOR YOU!" {{BLAM}}<br>"SO. ANY OF YOU OTHER CHILDREN WANT HELP WITH SOMETHING? WHAT ABOUT YOU, OLIVER? DO YOU STILL WANT MORE PORRIDGE? OH WAIT, YOU'RE DEAD! HAH! GET BACK TO FIGHTING YOU LITTLE PIECES OF SLIME!|From the records of Inquisitor Murtho}}

To some extent, they do actually exist in Warhammer canon, with [[Ciaphas Cain]] ('''HERO OF THE IMPERIUM!!!''') and [[Colonel-Commissar Ibram Gaunt|Ibram Gaunt]] being the most iconic examples, the fact that they became tremendously famous (OK, Gaunt - not so much) and idolized is implied to have led to many newer Commissars using their less trigger happy and more reasonable methods. Proof that sometimes, you can make a positive difference in Warhammer.

It could be argued that all Commissars are reasonable as most don't hold malicious intent when killing their own, or don't kill their own unless in extreme (Read: Chaos) circumstances, since most of the time shooting your own men can be counterproductive when they're light infantry fleeing from a Super heavy tank. Or if they, you know, have orders to pull back. Obviously they are evil fucks for killing their own men but usually it is done because it has to be done. Rules are rules, heresy is heresy, and Commissars have to show some authority. Not saying that they are necessarily nice guys but no Commissar ever sleeps well at night, except Gaunt, he was pretty fucking cool!

==Female Commissars==
A female Commissar is a rare sight, except by the Vostroyans, otherwise, there is little to no representation in the fluff. This is because women in the [[Schola Progenium]] are far more likely to end up in the [[Adepta Sororitas]] (because the limitations set after [[Goge Vandire|Goge Vandire]] had to go fuck everything up, so the Ecclesiarchy needs all they can get). However, there have been all-female regiments of guardswomen, and they only had female Commissars.

In the recent [[Lemartes]] novel, there is a female Commissar Stromberg attached to the [[Mordian Iron Guard]]--she died like she lived, making an infantry charge against motherfucking [[Skarbrand]] of all things before being ripped into 3 bits with one axe swing, thus buying enough time for the Blood Angels to regroup and therefore get all the glory of banishing the Daemon. Typical.

[[Commissar Raege]] is one of the rare cases of a woman that became a Commissar.

As of late 2018-2019, Games Workshop has put out a series of novels about a female Commissar called Severina Raine. They've also released a really nice model for her (which is horribly overpriced in cash - she costs nearly twice as much as the most expensive Commissar models, and has fairly lame rules). They've also hyped her as a fan favorite despite being a newcomer which reeks of [[Games Workshop#/tg/ Analysis of Games Workshop|corporate greed]], [[SJW|or worse]]; since Raine got a model while long-time fan-favorite [[Ciaphas Cain|Cain]] hasn't even got a model yet (unlike Cain, Gaunt and his Ghosts at least had metal minis made of them years ago).

==Commissar in Squat Regiments==
It was considered a common occurrence for a Commissar to be grouped with a [[Squat]] regiment when they were still relevant in 40k lore. However unlike in the Guard, the Commissars being stationed with the stunties act as advisers rather than a force of morale. This is mainly done to keep an eye on the Squats. Of course a Commissar is forbidden in {{BLAM|Blamming}} a Squat since while he has a Bolt/Laspistol, you basic [[Squat Trooper]] has Plasma Guns, Conversion Beamers and captured [[Eldar]] D-Cannons as their flashlight equivalent. So if the Commissar is a idiotic prick and thinks he/she has near impunity with the Squats he is stationed with, he will soon find his face kissing the barrel of a Squat Melta Gun.

Wish we still have some of our Dorfs back, then we can teach these red-capped bastards on what it is like on the firing li-{{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*''' insulting a Commissar is ''HERESY''! BLAM! BLAM! BLA-}} <span style='color:maroon;font-size:110%'>'''*FFSSSHHHHHOOOOOOOOOMMMMMM!* Oi! Ye Boltshell hit Grimmly in the eye! Your payment for harming us is swift ye Red-Capping Boggort!'''

Yeah, the Space Dorfs did not fuck around back in the day. Commissars act not only as advisers but also supporting leaders. But their leadership is often ineffectual when compared to that of [[Squat Warlord]], [[Guildmaster]] or heck, even a [[Living Ancestor]].

==Traitor Commissars==
{{Heresy}}
[[File:TraitorCommissarOgryn.jpg|thumb|200px|right|''Those who would break this oath are Heretics, worthy of neither pity, nor mercy! '']]
While it was originally believed to be near impossible for any Commissar to fall to Chaos (at least for those of you following the [https://regimental-standard.com/2017/05/10/your-friend-the-commissar/ The Regimental Standard], and [https://regimental-standard.com/2019/03/13/commissars-an-errata/ The Regimental Standard] never lies, although it may make very minor errors at times), the existence of Traitor Commissars has been confirmed. While it seems they still act as leaders of heretics and traitor Guardsmen, their exact role (and whether or not they execute people for being possible Loyalists) is uncertain, although a good guess is that they'd act like [[Renegade Enforcer|enforcers]] on a wider scale.<Br>
Ciaphas Cain in his memoirs states that Commissars occasionally do join chaos when their regiment joins chaos, but normally if a regiment decides to serve chaos, the Commissar is one of the first people killed by the regiment when it decides to purge loyalists of the Corpse Emperor. In one of the Ciaphas Cain books, a Commissar joins the 13th Black Crusade.

Out of meta, there are only two instances where we've seen playable chaos commissars: the first being the abovementioned Enforcers made by Forge World and the second being the Escalation expansion of [[Blackstone Fortress]], where he's accompanied by a mutant Ogryn bodyguard.

==What not to do around a Commissar==

[[Image:Commissar_NO.jpg|thumb|200px|right|If you have to ask...]]
Unless you have a death wish (since you're drafted into the Guard, we already KNOW you have a death wish) these are the things you should avoid doing around your Commissar unless you want to be shot for a number of reasons:

*Do not retreat until he says so.
*Do not look like you will retreat before he says so.
*Do not think about retreating before he says so.
*Do not think about thinking of retreating before he says so.
*Do not retreat even WHEN he says so.
*Do not refuse to retreat when he says so because you will later be shot for insubordination.
*Do not be incompetent in battle, he'll execute you for being useless.
*Do not move too far away from a Commissar attached to your squad, he might think you are retreating without his command.
*Do not fap to the women that are [[Shlicktau|xenos]], [[Cultist-chan|heretics]], or [[Furry|mutants]] while in the field of battle... or outside.
*Do not fap to [[-4_Str|human women]] either, he'll execute you for dereliction of duty. Also, Slaanesh worship.
*Do not fap '''AT ALL''' Because it is heresy. No! Fap to the Corpse-Empero- wait, I kinda gave that away, didn't- {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*''' HERESY!!}}
*Do not mock anyone in the upper command structure, social status and organizations. It's the same as treason and treason, kids, is [[HERESY]].
*Do not look at your Commissar with a [[grimdark]] look, he'll assume you want to kill him. Unless you're a Catachan. He doesn't need to see the look to know you want to kill him.
*Do not pretend to listen to your Commissar.
*Do not pretend to pretend to listen to your Commissar.
*GODAMMIT LISTEN TO YOUR COMMIS- {{BLAM|'''*CRACK*'''}} Oops my lasgun misfired. Sorry Commissar... (not really) {{BLAM|'''*Rolls a six on the armor save.''' '''*BLAMBLAMBLAMBLAMBLAM*''' Not apologizing for shooting your Commissar is heresy!}}
*Do not interrupt him while speaking, he'll execute you for the insubordination.
*Do not change your underwear. Tzeentch worship.
*Do not neglect to change your underwear. Nurgle worship.
*Do not bring up the paradox of changing underwear. Malal worship. (There is no paradox as long as you follow the correct procedure. First remove and burn the tainted garment while reciting the litany of blessed hygiene. Instead of "Changing" your underwear, proceed to replace the purged garments with identical standard pattern guard issued underwater.)
*Do not worship the [[Chaos|ruinous powers]], even if your Commissar is-{{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*''' Commissars are loyal servants of the Emperor!}}
*Do not look like you are worshipping the ruinous powers.
*Do not think about worshipping the ruinous powers.
*Do not think about thinking about worshipping the ruinous powers.
*Do not think '''AT ALL''' or he'll think you are thinking about worshiping the ruinous powers.
*Do not find out about the Ruinous Powers. Best you can hope for is being sterilised and mind-wiped.
*Do not fall ill. Nurgle worship.
*Do not fall seriously ill. Serious Nurgle worship.
*Do not think about getting ill. More Nurgle worship.
*Do not think abou- To Hell with this, you are already thinking about getting ill! {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*'''}}
*Do not watch "My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic", that is both Tzeentch and Slaanesh worship. (and if the excessive cuteness makes you sick than it's also Nurgle Worship, and if the associations with Chaos or furries makes you overly angry that's Khorne worship.)
*Do not openly question his orders.
*Do not question his orders behind his back either.
*Do not suggest your orders are suicidal.
*Do not suggest that said "''suicidal''" Commissar should join the enemy, if he is able to kill his squad so quickly.
*Do not suggest anything, lest he take it for Heresy.
*Do not mention that the Ministorum Priests are better motivators. {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*''' Insubordination!}}
*Do not mention that the sanctioned Psykers scare you more than him. <s>{{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*''' Insubordination again!}}</s> {{BLAM|Actually that's acceptable, the mutant witch must be thoroughly abhorred and constantly monitored for [[heresy]].}} '''UNBLAM!'''<br/> Commissar did I just see you execute a guardsmen and than bring him back to life? Could that perhaps be a bit of chaos sorcery? *Flashes Inquisitorial Seal* I think we need to have a little chat back aboard my ship. Seize this Commissar on suspicion of [[Heresy]]!
*Do not mention that he is the most useless unit to have in a command squad. {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*''' Insubordination again! Why won't you die!?}}<br/> Oh Holy Terra your Unblamming made him a [[perpetual]]. Take this guardsman back to the ship as well and tell the captain to prepare for [[Exterminatus]] this whole page is corrupted.
*Do NOT interrupt him while attempting to execute someone <s>unless you have a pretty good reason</s> as he'll execute you along with the one about to be executed.
*DO NOT UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES challenge him or her in a western shootout. Why? Because they'll {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*'''}} kill you all in LESS than a splitsecond, now get back to the front, or you'll join him.
*DO NOT UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES give your Commissar a new bolt pistol for his birthday. Just think of how fast he can {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*'''}} your squad if he goes Akimbo...
*Do not ask a Commissar for a bullet in the head. He ''will'' have you flogged for cowardice.
*Do not ask a Commissar for a flogging. He '''''WILL''''' have you shot in the spine for being a Slaaneshi Cultist. Not that that's a bad thing, being a Sla-{{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*''' HERESY!}}
*Do not, in any way, shape, or form, give a zealous Commissar an Assault Cannon. You will have no unit.
*Do not, under any circumstances, give a zealous Commissar a Deathstrike Missile Launcher. You ''will'' have no army.
*Do not give a zealous Commissar a spacecraft. You will have [[Exterminatus|lost a planet]].
*Do not give a Commissar a cookie, or he'll think you are trying to poison him. You chaos worshipping freak.
*Do not be bald, then you are a Genestealer.
*Do not be balding, then you are becoming a Genestealer.
*Do not think about balding, then you are thinking about becoming a Genestealer.
*Do not think about thinking about balding, you don't wanna become a Genestealer.
*Do not add to this list, or else he will have you shot for insubordination. He- Yes, Sir!... No, sir... Sir? {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*''' HERESY!}}
*<strike>THIS LIST NEEDS MORE CHAOS!</strike>{{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*''' HERESY!}}!!
*Do not use an axe as a last-ditch weapon. Khornate behaviour. Only acceptable if having said "For the Emperor!" and dying soon afterwards for the Imperium.
*Do not eat your rations in a particularly vigorous manner. Khorne worship.
*Any alteration of the standard uniform shall not be tolerated. Tzeentch worship.
*Growing facial hair in the pres- {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*'''}}. More Tzeentch worship.
*Do not cut yourself while shaving your facial hair. More Khorne worship.
*Surviving a life threatening injury at the hands of the enemy. Serious Tzeentch worship.
*Do not bring prostitutes to the base while your unit is on leave. Slaanesh worship (and just plain improper behavior).
*Waking up lat- {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*'''}}. Cowardice.
*Do not deface or lose your Imperial Infantrymen's Uplifting Primer. (even though any veteran guardsman will tell you most of pages are complete bullsh- {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*''' HERESY!}} )
*Calling your self a member of the "Astra Militarum" {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*''' HERESY!}} we are and always have been the Imperial Guard: Hammer of the Emperor!
*Do not lose your issued Lasgun. Unless it's loss is unavoidable in{{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*'''}} {{BLAM|A proper Guardsman would never lose his Lasgun.}}
*Do not remind him that technically Commissars are outside the chain of command and cannot order you. So next time a fraking com- {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*'''. Cursing Commissars is HERESY!!!}}
*Do not try to take the easy way out with suicide. Malal worship. {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*''' HERESY! MALAL DOES NOT EXIST!}}
*Do not kill heretics. Malal worship. {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*''' HERESY! Once again, MALAL DOES NOT EXIST!}}
*Do not steal from a Commissar.
*Do not make fun of the Emperor.
*Do not act in a way that convinces your Commissar that you could be a [[Genestealer]]. After all, it could be any one of us. It could be you, it could be me, it could even b{{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*'''}} Whoa, whoa! {{BLAM|What? It was ''obvious''! He's the Genestealer! Watch, he'll sprout gribbly bits any second now! ... Any... Second now... See? Gribbly bits! No, wait, that's intestines.}} So, we still have a problem. {{BLAM|Big problem. Alright, who's ready to go find the Genestealer?}} <span style="color:purple">Right behind you.</span> {{BLAM|'''*BLAMBLAMBLAMBLAMBLAMBLAM!*''' BY THE EMPEROR, SEND THE ULTRAMARINES, THEY'RE EVERYWHERE!}}
* Do not gift the Commissar a bolter. This will allow him to blam even more {{BLAM|'''*BLAMBLAMBLAMBLAMBLAMBLAMBLAMBLAMBLAMBLAM*''' Your unit has been executed for Cowardice!}} <s>Sir they were the artill-</s> {{BLAM|'''*BLAM*''' Disagreeing with the Commissar is heresy as well!}}
*Do not gift the Commissar a Missile launcher. He will use it on the tanks. {{BLAM| '''Any tank that does not drive into sward swiping distance is clearly a traitor tank! *FWOOSH!*}}
*Do not gift the Commissar a heavy bolter. Seriously, just do--{{BLAM|'''*THUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMP* I will use whatever weapon I want to dammit!'''}} Ha ha you missed. That's what happens when you move with a heavy weapon idi- {{BLAM| '''*SLASH* Fight phase bitch! Eat power sword!'''}}
* Whatever else you do, Never Ever EVER steal a Commissar's hat.

==What to do around a Commissar==
[[File:Oh Lawd.png|150px|right|thumb|Nothing escapes the vigilant eye of a Commissar (except everything)]]
*Worship the Emperor
*Talk fairly loudly about how the chaos gods suck. (Except for slaanesh who is just bad damn thing dosen't need to suck any more. Besides, saying Slaanesh sucks could be considered worship, resulting in a {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!ing*'''}}).
*Make sure all your gear is organized, cleaned, maintained, and free of non-standard issue modifications.
*Do go into [[rage]] mo- {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*''' Getting angry is Khorne worship! (Raging over the filthy xenos is acceptable though.)}}
*Praise him on a job well done when circumstances are right- {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*''' Kissing ass is borderline Slaneesh worship!}}
*Shine his laspistol when he isn't using it. {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*''' Handling your superior officer's weapons is grand treason!}}
*Give him a blowjo- {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*''' SLAANESHI HERETIC!}}
*Charge towards Khorne Berserkers even if you don't want to. {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*''' Suicidal charges are borderline Khorne worship. Neglecting to charge however is disobeying orders. So either way you get '''*BLAM!*'''ed.}}
*Go to battle even if you're feeling sic- {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*''' Spreading sickness to your comrades is serious Nurgle worship!}}
*Compliment his marksmanship skills. {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*''' WHAT DID I SAY ABOUT KISSING ASS!!?}} Pff, missed m- {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*''' Easily enough to fix.}}
*Let him know in advance when you're having a sick day so he won't execute you for dereliction of du- {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*''' NURGLE WORSHIPER!}}
*Have your uplifting primer on your person. Failure to present it on request will result in {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*'''}}.
*Bring him [[An Eldar's Ears|a captive Eldar]] {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*''' XENOS LOVING FILTH!!}} ([[Love Can Bloom|"I'll be happy to take that captive off your hands Commissar, the agents of the Assasinorum are experienced in such matters."]])
*When the rest of your squad looks like they are gonna fall back, step away from the Commissar's general direction as he might choose to execute you to make an example for the rest of the men.
*When the rest of your squad looks like they are gonna fall back, step towards the Commissar's general direction as he might choose to execute you to make an example for the rest of the men.
*When you are about to do something that can only be described as batshit insane and a Commissar's around suggest it to him, if you survive said suicide mission he'll probably favor you a bit, which probably means that he MIGHT actually think about who's he shooting at.
*If you're the guy at the wheel of a transport, DRIVE HIM CLOSER! HE WANTS TO HIT THE ENEMIES OF THE EMPRAH WITH HIS SWORD!
*Pee on Dead Orks
*Prior to giving him wargear, make sure that you ''haven't'' cleaned it, most Commissars prefer the bloodstained wargear look. {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*''' failure to clean blood off of your weapons or uniform is an offence against the Departmento Munitorum policies!}}
*Make sure you're the only man left in the squad other than the Commissar when retreating, the Commissar rulebook says that if the squad he is attached to only has one man left, he isn't allowed to make his face blow up because he'd end up looking stupid and it's a waste of ammo since there is nobody to inspi {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*''' The Commissar does what he wants!}}
*If the Commissar looks pissed read (or at least pretend to read) an Imperial Creed book or something, he can't shoot you because you're reading Imperial Creed stu-- {{BLAM|'''*BLAM*''' Now you are no longer reading it. Situation resolved.}}
*Bring an RPG or other Big Fucking Gun in case he tries to blam you. Make sure you say "you've been bla- {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*''' HERESY!}} (pssst! Make sure you say "You've been BLAMMED!" ''after'' you kill the Commissar and know there aren't more on the battlefield. [[Just As Planned|WHO'S LAUGHING NOW COMMISSARS!?]]){{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*''' HERESY!}}
*If your Commissar has a bolt pistol make sure there that when he starts {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*'''}}ing that there are 10 people closer to the Commissar then you. That way after he's done blaming the rest of your platoon he might think you 'suitably inspired' so as to not blam you. {{BLAM|'''*CLICK*'''}} See it works! {{BLAM|'''*BLAM*''' RELOADING IS ONLY A TEMPORARY INCONVENIENCE TO THE AGENTS OF THE IMPERIUM!}}
*Be born on [[Catachan Jungle Fighters|Catachan]] those over dressed foreigners don't have the balls to shoot you. {{BLAM|HERESY!! '''*KABOOM*'''}} "Why no sarge, I have no idea why the Commissar decided to do a patrol, through a mine field, in the dead of night.
*Be a member of the Karauvan Conservators. Vance Motherfucking Stubbs loves his motherfucking men. Also because no Commissar wants to {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*'''}} people who can {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*'''}} a Living Saint to death with flashlights.
*Instead of ''DYING'', try to acquire the Enemy's head. Minor kudos for a Grunt, some kudos for an NCO Equivalent, and perhaps at least a bit of respect from the Commissar him/herself for an enemy Commander, or said Commander's Lieutenants. Possible points if you shout out: ''"DEATH UNTO THE ENEMIES OF MA-..."'' <strike>{{BLAM|'''*BLAM*''' Borderline Khorne-Worship!}}</strike> ('''ALL''' foes of mankind must be cleansed. Punishing such actions is heretical in of itself Commissar.) '''Unblam''' {{BLAM|Re-'''*BLAM*''' RESURRECTING THE DEAD IS SERIOUS HERESY!!}}
'''Inquisitorial Decree:''' Commissars are henceforth forbidden from '''Unblamming'''. The practice of resurrecting the dead is chaos sorcery. Loyal imperial citizens who have been accidentally {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*'''ed}} can take solace in the fact that their souls will spend eternity basking in the Emperor's divine light.

==Notable Commissars==
*[[Colonel-Commissar Ibram Gaunt]] (<s>Who?</s>) {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*''' HERESY!}} ([[Derp|The one, who killed a Daemon Prince with 1 hit from a simple Close Combat Weapon, in the era when DP was Eternal Warrior.]])
*[[Commissar Yarrick]] <span style='color:green;font-size:115%'> Da orkiest humie eva!!</span>
*Commissar [[Ciaphas Cain]] '''HERO OF THE IMPERIUM!!!!!''' Secretly believes himself to be a coward. The truth of that is up for debate.
*Commissar [[Severina Raine]]: the main character of the short story ''''Execution''' and the novel '''Honor Bound''' by Rachel Harrison, Severina is the rare female Commissar who has managed to get her own (limited-run and therefore overpriced) figure and rules!
*Commissar-General Delane Oktar: Ibram Gaunt's mentor and substitute father-figure. He should have died better.
*[[Commissar Fuklaw]] is tired of putting up with your heretical bullshit.
*[[Commissar Dan]]: A /tg/-created character from the days of yore (along with Fuklaw and the [[Angry Marines]]) that got somewhat canon-ised by Fantasy Flight Games. Likes to order charges from atop his [[Basilisk Artillery Gun|Basilisk]] ''Fluffy''. According to FFG, his full name is Daniel Sterne and he met his end while attempting to ram a [[Helbrute]] with ''Fluffy'' when the damn thing came too close.
*[[Commissar Koulick Krieg]] attached to the famed storm trooper regiment known as the Redemption Corps and an agent for the Adeptus Ministorum. Never officially trained as a Commissar, but field promoted from storm trooper on behalf of the Ecclesiarchy to infiltrate the "heretical" regiment that was the free thinking Redemption Corps, eventually turning on his masters and becoming a full part of the Corps instead.
*[[Heretical Love|Commissar Max]] the Lovemachine of Yagis V. (It should be noted that he was actually a guardsman who picked up Commissar regalia and weapons.)
*[[K59|Commissar K59]]
*[[Holt]] {{BLAM|'''*SLAP*''' Commissar Holt!!!}}
*[[Commissar Raege]]
*<strike>[[Kharn|Kharn]] [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LRVcdLPqoHg| The Commissar]</strike> {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*''' Major Khorne worship!}}
*[[Colonel Greiss]] Formerly a Commissar; became a conventional officer through necessity.
* [[Commissar Lord Bernn|Commissar LORD Bernn]] (always put LORD in ALL CAPS -bold is optional-, not doing so is Heresy.) Known for making entire armies completely invincible as long as he has people to execute and beating Mega-Daemon Princes, Hive Tyrants, Land Raider Redeemers, Battlewagons, Deranged Khornate Chaos Champions (if you're so far off your rocker that other Khornates think you're crazy, you may be a wee bit nutters), and Eldar wraithlords to death with a power fist. Also notable for being able to one-shot any infantry, from lowly Ork boyz to TERMINATORS with his laspistol. He needs no words to show he's a badass.
*'''Commissar "Colonel" Schaeffer''' He had his arm shot off by a plasma gun '''AND GREW IT BACK''', had his spine rebuilt after being crushed by a tank and made a full recovery, had his eyes replaced after his other ones were destroyed and has survived being thrown into suicide mission after suicide mission for over 300 years '''LIKE A BOSS''', he gets down and dirty and is usually seen in front of his men in the battle rather than behind them. He's still brutal as fuck to deserters though. *why doesn't he have his own pag- {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*'''}}
* '''Commissar Jaes "Jellyfish" Quallen'''. Fragile, stuttering, clumsy, prone to disease, about as intimidating as a wet kitten. His enlistment was a cruel wager between two of his rich aunts to see if he would survive. He barely made his commission as Commissar, and he was discarded to the Catachan 217th infantry to get rid of him. And yet he's still alive today. What's more, he leads his men from the very front, utterly fearless when the jagged teeth of Chaos spawn ('''OH GOD NOOOOOOAAAAAUUUUUUUGHHHHHHH!!! GRRAAAAAAAAAGH!!!!''' {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*''' Mercy killing; continue.}}) are inches from his face, humming to himself in the middle of the shitstorm that is every battlefield. Atypical for a Catachan company, his men are quite loyal to him, well-liked for leading by example instead of inspiring fear behind the lines ... although they do tease him off-duty by playing keepaway with his hat.
*'''Commissar Viktor Hark''' - The Commissar for the Tanith First (and Only). Pretty bad ass dude with a cybernetic arm to beat heretics and a plasma pistol to melt faces with. Pretty reasonable for a Commissar, preferring {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*'''}} only when it can have the most effect on a units morale, which in some cases means {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*'''}}ming the guy in charge.
*'''Commissar Flint''' was abruptly reassigned to the reconstituted 77th Vostroyan Firstborn Dragoons, whose first mission was to quell a bloody rebel uprising at a penal facility on Furia Penitens. Leading a picked team of escaped convicts and Firstborn, Flint infiltrated the vast creepy facility, wrecking Stalkers, slaying giant mutants with his power sword and slaughtering literal rebel scum by the dozens, all while keeping his execution-count impressively low and displaying many feats of epic badassery. Not bad for a Commissar who gets his own book who isn't Gaunt or Cain.
*'''Commissar Fenstrum Holt''': A supporting character in the ongoing '''Eagle Ordinary''' [http://www.eagleordinary.com/chapters/77723/planetfall/]webcomic. NOT to be confused with (though he constantly is, even by his own junior, Commissar Talon Gunner) that ''other'' Holt *SLAP* [[Commissar Holt]]. '''This''' Holt is an elderly badass with a creepy bionic eye who manages to beat up trigger-happy aristocratic officers despite being only 5'6. Although introduced in the comic's first page engaging in the Commissariat's trademark pastime {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*-ming'''}} Guardsmen, his character is so well-written and drawn he might just be the fan favorite. Might just be the only adult in the whole comic as well.
*'''Commissar Daridh Ahl Karif''' : Commissar of the Fifth Company, 68th Vostroyan Regiment, one of the main character in the ''Rebel Winter'' novel. One of the few Reasonable Commissars in 40k. An unnaturally caring, nice, level-headed Commissar but also sternly ruthless when the situation demands it. Got posted down to a company-level commission in a pretty much worthless campaign for rejecting a Lord General's son homosexual love (no, seriously), leading to the rejected dude committing suicide. Currently serves as part of an Inquisitorial retinue.
*'''Commissar Vaynom Blenner''' - A Commissar attached to the Tanith First (and Only). Basically the shit drug addict version of Ciaphas Cain.

==Commissar Mortality==
Commissars, at least those attached to an Imperial guard regiment, do not exactly have a high life expectancy. Next to the many horrible fates that await your average "balls of steel" Guardsman in the [[grimdark]] WH40K universe, the Commissars have some additional aggravating factors leading to a quick demise.

Some reasons:
* A Commissar's uniform is very different from those he is working with, add to that he is shouting things at people and possibly {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*'''}}-ming them, probably without fire being returned at him, and is probably carrying different weapons than those around him. It doesn't take a genius to figure out he is an obvious High-Value Target which any sniper worth the name would take note of.
* Aforementioned uniform offers little to no head protection, head protection is for cowards and cowards get {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*'''}}-med. (However, a Commissar's lack of headgear can get him {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*'''}}-med by the enemy).(subverted for death korps as they have helmets under their hats)
* {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*'''}}-ming cowards, and especially {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*'''}}-ming non-cowards, often has a side effect of *accidentally* getting shot, repeatedly, sometimes even far from the front lines. This fate is particularly common for those attached to [[Catachan Jungle Fighters|Catachan]] units.
* Even when not getting *accidentally* shot/dropped in a pit/run over/... by his own troops, few Guardsmen will risk their lives to save a Commissar should he get into trouble with the enemy.
* Some Commissars both lead by example and expect their men to perform acts of suicidal courage, resulting in performing collective suicide in the name of the Emprah.
* Lots of Commissars like big flashy bolt pistols. Bolt pistols, [[Dakka|being roight flashy bitz of dakka]], naturally attract orks like sugar water attracts flies, and unlike laspistols eventually run out of bolts.
* According to their most recent models some unusually ballsy Commissars carry plasma pistols, and as such possess a statistical lifespan of six shots at maximum. {{BLAM|'''*ZAP*''' Simply re-roll the ones with the cadia doctrine. anyone who doesn't spend cp to reroll said ones is a filty heretic!}}

It should be noted that regimental standards vary:<br>
- Kriegers will leave a Commissar a wreck because they have to keep convincing the men that while it's laudable to die for the Emperor you have to do so while trying to kill His enemies. It's like herding sheep: if you keep your eye off of one for too long it'll be gone. Except this sheep wears a gas mask, digs a trench, bombards the enemy with mortar fire, then goes over the top and gets gunned down without achieving anything. Oh, and there's millions more like it.<br>
- Serving with the Tallarn regiments that there will be sand EVERYWHERE. There's so much fucking sand everywhere. I mean, how did it even get there? Not to mention that you'll want to wear one of their turbans to protect your head against the heat, but you can't wear your cap alongside one of those things. And many a Commissar has suffered from dehydration following being told exactly what most of the regiment's water is distilled from.<br>
- The Mordians employ the strictest of discipline and expect a Commissar to lead by example. When they inevitably mess up the Commissar is subjected to physical disciplinary actions, up to and including being flogged or even executed by the platoon.<br>
- The Vostroyans are ABSOLUTE MADMEN and expect the Commissar to lead by examples of balls-out insanity and win the day, but they have trouble following the orders of a man who has no imposing facial hair. If a Commissar's lucky he'll be approached by one of the regiment's senior female officers who offers him one of her glue-on mustaches to spare him the indignity.<br>
- Scintillans show utter disdain for the Commissar because of his poor breeding and low social standing (word has it the Commissar is an orphan, for the Emperor's sake!) and will have their authority undermined by even the lowest of privates and when trouble arises a senior officer steps in and takes the offending soldier away, but punishment following this is rare.<br>
- Praetorians are fine enough soldiers, but their culture is very strange and requires unusual degrees of politeness from both officers and the rank-and-file. Not following these labyrinthian rules will be sternly frowned upon. And their officers will never, ever duck even when taking direct fire.<br>
- Drookians openly hate the Commissar's guts for being an outsider and a nancy for wearing pants instead of a kilt, but a clever Commissar will figure out that if he manages to convince the platoon that the enemy has slighted the Drookians' clan honor all he needs to do is step aside and watch the men fuck the enemy up.<br>
- Brontians solve most of their internal struggles with knife fights, and the unfortunate Commissar who steps in to try and stop such a duel will quickly catch one, two, three or thirteen knives to the chest. The Brontians don't like them anyway due to their lack of scars.<br>
- Attilans laugh their asses of when the Commissar tries to ride a horse and keep falling off, and the platoon just rides ahead of him leaving the unfortunate Commissar in the dust.<br>
- The Steel Legions are almost entirely mechanized, so a Commissar has to hang out with the same squad all the time. And he better be able to keep up when redeploying: miss the Chimera and it ain't coming back for you. Plus, nobody respects you because you're not Yarrick.<br>
- With the Valhallans you constantly have to convince the commanders that yes, while it would result in a technical victory if you sacrifice a million men for that small amount of ground, it'd be better to have them attack in a different way to win slower but with fewer losses. And they'll hate you for this.<br>
- The Chem Dogs will hate the Commissar because people like him put them there, and will try to rob him blind without being found out.<br>
- Elysian, Harakoni and Phantine Skyborne regiments have a high Commissar mortality rate because they're not very well trained in the use of grav-chutes. And with those things, you'll make a mistake only once. Drop regiments in general have high mortality, so successfully landing is not much of an achievement either. <br>
- With the Phantine Air Corps it's hard to say. On the one hand they are a guard regiment and not a navy unit, so Commissars come standard. What they do is trickier to say since they can't fly and even on bombers it's hard to justify attaching a spare person just to shoot one of the valuable air crew if they start to turn around, which if our own history of strategic bombing holds true, does not really happen, plus it would be a stupid waste to get a bomber formation shot down because unlike the men they are actually worth something to the Munitorum. Commissars therefore likely just sit around not doing much other then paper work and watching the pilots like a hawk when ever they are on the ground, thus proving that even in the 41st millennium the chair force meme still exists. {{BLAM|Then we shall destroy cowardly aircraft! '''*Fwoosh*'''}}<br>
- Kanak Skull Takers will hate the Commissar because he prevents them from taking skulls, and they do so anyway. If he becomes forceful about it they'll take a skull with a fancy hat.<br>
- Naval Commissars are the first targets when a mutiny occurs/the ship gets boarded. Otherwise, you aren't likely to survive a voidship becoming combat ineffective if not straight up losing life support/about half the bulkheads/the reactor/the engines/the magazine and Emperor forbid the Warp Drive or the Gellar Field Generator.

==Quotes==

* "Fear me...'''''but follow!'''''"
* "You can give the Emperor your loyalty, or I can take it from your corpse."
* "You DARE shoot at me?...{{BLAM|'''AT ME?!'''}}
* "What I cannot crush with words, I shall crush with the tanks of the Imperial Guard."
* "Fear ensures loyalty! Where do you need me?"
* "Trooper, the enemy ''may'' kill you, but if you try to run I '''will''' kill you!"
* {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*'''}}
*"It is our duty to muster the Guardsmen's courage and loyalty under fire and it is our duty to - '''GET THE FUCK BACK HERE!'''"{{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*'''}}{{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*'''}}
*"WHO GAVE YOU PERMISSION TO DIE?! 'CAUSE I SURE AS HELL DIDN'T!"
*[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xrrCY7dgaqs Drive me closer, I want to hit them with my sword!]
* "Follow my example or I will MAKE YOU ONE!"
* A compilation of some -if not all- of DowII Commissar quotes can be found: [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=isLz_8ppLig here].
* <s>Heil Hitler!</s> {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!* HERESY!!!'''}} Heil Emperor!
** Wouldn't it be "Heil der Gott-Kaiser"? {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!* HERESY!!!''' It is "Heil dem Gott-Imperator!" Good job on the hyphen, though.}}
*** Also wasn't the Emperor Hitler back in the 1930s? {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*'''}}
**** The Corp...errr...'''The God-Emperor''' was never Hitler! Hitler had social skills!{{BLAM|'''*BLAM*''' Nice try heretic.}}
*****{{BLAM|'''*KA-BOOM*''' Talking about Hitler is heresy! He was a piece of shit!}}

* "If you will not serve in combat, ''then you will serve '''on the firing line!'''''" {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*'''}}
* "SHUT UP ZATHRAS"
*"GLORY TO THE FIRST MAN TO DIE!"
*"DO NOT FAIL UPON MY RETURN!"
==TLDR==
How many Guardsmen were Executed writing this article?

==Gallery==
<center><gallery>
Image:Severina-Raine.jpg|Isn't she a beauty? Canon too!
Image:Commisarmoti.jpg|The real reason why Guardsmen do not revolt en masse.
Image:Closer.jpg|Commissars never let practicality get in the way of their awesomeness.
Image:Commissar Surfing.jpg|Again, practicality is never a hindrance.
Image:Comissar_Promotions.jpg|Imperial Guard Promotion policy, you either get promoted or {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*'''}}-med, no exceptions.
Image:1230024061774.png|Reasonable Commissars know that summary execution is not always needed to motivate anyone.
Image:Thenewcommissar.jpg|[[Kharn]] during his traitor Commissar days with the Red Rivers traitor guardsmen.
Image:Romantic_Commissar.jpg|Commissars can be romantic. It's just that they are too busy {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*'''}}-ming Guardsmen.
Image:Penguin_Commisar.jpg|Do not underestimate the Commissar under any circumstances, no matter how cute he may be.
Image:Komissar_by_kriegsmachine14.jpg|Why so serious? Let's put a smile on that face...
Image:Commissarpoke.jpg|Don't let this one's slow demeanor make you too confident.
Image:1207335821953.jpg|[[Commissar Dan]] on the blaze of glory run
Image:Commissar-Fuck_Yeah.jpg|Imperial Guard, FUCK YEAH!
Image:Commissar_Badass.jpg|[[Ciaphas Cain|HERO OF THE IMPERIUM!]]
Image:Fixedhat2.jpg|The Commissar is here to ensure your loyalty.
Image:CommissarCos.jpg|{{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*'''}}
Image:Commissar Hansen.jpg|Guardian of all Imperial [[loli|lolis]].
Image:Emote-commissar.gif
</gallery></center>
{{Promotions}}
<center><gallery>
Image:Comissar-by-Chink-1.jpg|Chink loev Commissar
Image:Comissar-by-Chink-2.jpg|[[Rule 63]] spares no one.
Image:Yarrick_by_Chink_1.jpg|[[Commissar Yarrick]] by Chink
Image:Yarrick_by_Chink_2.jpg
Image:Feb.jpg|Commissar from the ill-fated /tg/ calendar project
Image:Atra concept.jpg|Much Sexier Version
Image:Daemonette commisssar.JPG|One of these is not like the others.
Image:1226746378911.jpg|Squad morale restored.
Image:powerfists_commissar.jpg|[https://wargameexclusive.com/shop/imperial-soldiers/imperial-female-commissar-with-fists-of-power-pin-up/ If you're wondering how she's "coping" with those things, don't ask us, for we have as good an idea as you do.]
</gallery></center>

==Navigation==
{{Template:Imperial-Guard}}
{{Militarum-Tempestus}}
{{Template:Squats}}

[[Category:Commissars]]

Blam

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[[Category:Meme]]

[[Image:Commissar_NO.jpg|center]]

The '''BLAM''' Technique is an onomatopoeia for a gunshot, and is what /tg/ calls the ability of an Imperial Guard [[Commissar]] to execute anyone he ([[Severina Raine|or she]]) finds guilty of '''[[HERESY]]''' (and GW had to specifically say in errata that he will not [[Just as Planned|execute himself]]). It is most often used by editors who search Imperium-related pages for "heretical" edits, cross them out, and edit in '''BLAM!!'''. It is also used as shorthand for said executions (as a verb), or for similar executions in a non-40k context. Also acceptable is '''FWIP''', the onomatopoeia for firing an arrow for settings without guns, or where they are a rarity. Occasionally you see orks perform a '''BLAM''' with green text after words explaining why they did so, all such blams are assumed to have actually been [[MOAR DAKKA|multiple blams]], in the spirit of [[Dakka]], and on rarer occasions, Kroot will as well. T'au pages sometimes utilize it as well, but with substantially lower amounts of blam, and a case of Eldar blam exists on the [[Warhammer_40,000/Tactics/Eldar(8E)|8th edition tactics page]].

[[File:Empire Archer.jpg|300px|thumb|center| <s>The vulture cult is no more!</s> {{FWIP}} {{FWIP|that's a pheasant you Poacher!}}]]

'''Example:'''

<s>[[Pauldron|PAULDRONS ARE STUPID]]</s> {{BLAM}} {{BLAM|Heresy!}}

<s>[[Vostroyan Firstborn|MUSTACHES ARE FOR PUSSIES]]</s> {{FWIP}} {{FWIP|Heresy!}}

<s>[[Dakka|DAKKA IS DUMB]]</s> {{BLAM}} <span style='color:green;font-size:100%'>'''OI I DON'T KNOW WOT YA GITZ ARE ON ABOUT BUT YA HATE THE DAKKA YOU GET THE DAKKA!!!'''</span>

<s><span style='color:yellow;font-size:115%'>The Kroot will clean this mess! '''*Snarl*''' </span></s> {{BLAM|'''*BLAM*'''Alright, who let the damn Kroot fanboys in here!?}}

<s><span style='color:blue;font-size:115%;font-family:serif'> Stupid Mon'keigh. You wonder why we think so little of you</span></s> {{BLAM|'''*BLAM*''' What the hell is this, 7th edition?! Fuck you xenos!}}

<s>HERESY IS SHIT!</s> {{BLAM}} {{bLAM|Here-}} <s>Oh shit. Probably shouldn't have shot him.</s> {{BLAM}} {{bLAM|Excecuting loyal commissars is HERESY!}} {{BLAM}} {{BLAM|Executing even traitor Commissars is HERESY!}} {{BLAM}} {{BLAM|What did we just say about excecuting Commissars!}}{{BLAM}} -[https://youtu.be/d0BuKYiwhVQ?t=368 ad infinitum]

==See Also==

[[:Template:BLAM]]
[[:Template:FWIP]]

Blam

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Herman von Strab

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2A02:1811:5180:A200:EC3D:29FD:FA1D:618: Holy fucking typos, Batman! And keep /pol/ out of it , will you?

{{Heresy}}

{{topquote|The greatest waste of flesh and bone born in the last five hundred years!|Princeps Prime Kurtiz Mannheim about von Strab}}
{{topquote|I surrender and volunteer for treason.|Zap Brannigan}}
{{topquote|They misunderestimated me.|George W. Bush and probably von Strab himself}}

[[File:Von Strab Wanted.jpg|thumb|right|Behold the incarnation of incompetence...and improper dressing.]]
'''Herman von Strab''', also known as "that fucking twidliot", "treasonous scum" and many other similar [[rage|heartwarming]] descriptions, was a member of the [[Imperium of Man|imperial]] nobility of the planet [[Armageddon]], being the maximum authority of the planet as its Overlord (Planetary Governor) around 941.M41. He is infamous in all the galaxy for being one of the most incompetent, egotistical and traitorous individuals to ever come out from humanity, and considering the history of the galaxy, that says a lot. He is particularly known by his actions during the Second and Third Wars of Armageddon against [[ork]] warlord [[Ghazghkull Mag Uruk Thraka]], being so harmful for the defenders in both conflicts that [[fail|the term Von Strab is used all around the Imperium as a term for incompetence and selfishness]]. Calling someone from Armageddon "Von Stab" will probably end up with the caller [[rage|either shot or brutally mauled]]. That's how much he's hated by everyone on the planet and everyone involved in both wars.

==Rise to power==

Herman von Strab was born in the von Strab noble family of Armageddon, with his father occupying the position of Overlord himself. Being one of many brothers in a noble family in the Imperium, he was surrounded by conspiracies, intrafamily killings, and other noble hobbies from a very early age. Perversely, the fact that he was never the sharpest tool in the shed actually worked out well for him, as unlikely as it sounds.

Since Herman was a brutish idiot, his brothers never considered him to be an actual threat, so they ignored little Herman and concentrated on scheming against one another, leaving Herman to act with impunity. [[FAIL|This ended horribly for Herman's brothers]], as he managed to kill his three elder brothers: the eldest by bomb, which killed 322 other nobles and functionaries; the next by a hit and run driver; and the last elder brother with bolter fire and having the balls to claim that it was a suicide, despite the fact that he was on the crime scene with a smoking bolter. (The authorities decided to sit on their hands, since they were going to be Herman's underlings pretty soon anyways, and familicide in a noble family was as common as wars in the Imperium, so they decided it was best to let it go.) As the single survivor of his brothers, Herman then murdered his father and became the ruler of Armageddon, using the riches of the prosperous planet to live a life of decadence, and basically doing as little work as possible (which was probably a good thing, since everything he touched turned to shit).

==The Second War of Armageddon: von Strab repeatedly fucks up==

In 941.M41, the planet of Armageddon was subject to one of the biggest ork invasions an imperial planet had ever seen since the days of [[The Beast]]. This WAAAAAGH! showed signs of its imminent danger and destructive power very early on, almost years before the invasion in fact. However, von Strab ignored all of the warning signs of this impending danger, which ranged from sightings of hulks getting closer to the system to a statue of the Emperor [[wat|crying tears of blood]]. He kept silencing all military personnel that warned him about the potential danger of the xenos, not wanting to inform the Administratum [[Fail|to keep the glory of defeating the orks all for himself]]. Only when a [[Commissar Yarrick|commissar]] went against orders and sent a distress call to the wider Imperium, he started recognizing the possible threat, while also banishing Yarrick to the relatively unimportant hive Hades.

The arrival of Thraka himself to the planet proved too much for von Strab's tactical abilities, taking catastrophic casualties, from tens of thousands of PDF troops, to most of the air forces of the planet to the Iron Skulls [[Titan (Warhammer 40,000)|Titan Legion]]. Losing a Titan is a very shameful and career-ending casualty for most officers ([[grimdark|even if they lost it in a justified action]]) so losing a full legion of them in a more or less pointless action against orks was practically a death sentence. This was also happening while Commissar Yarrick was making a name for himself, bravely defending Hive Hades and becoming a hero and a beacon of hope to the defenders, which probably turned von Strab a shade green of envy that could give the orks a run for their teef. In an act of desperation, von Strab scrambled a couple of virus bombs that were hidden in the planet centuries ago against the orks, but in typical von Strab fashion, [[fail|this ploy failed due to the bad maintenance of this devices]]. Humiliated, surrounded by orks, and with his authority completely evaporated, von Strab hid himself in his bunker to sulk and waited for the war to be over.

Yet once the warp storms that cut off Armageddon from the rest of the galaxy receded and allowed for reinforcements to arrive, it was the [[Space Marine|Space Marines]] of the [[Blood Angels]], [[Salamanders]] and [[Ultramarines]] who answered the call. [[Dante]] took over command, and put the now-relieved overlord of the planet under house arrest (much to the chagrin of von Strab). After imperial reinforcements helped Armageddon's defenders push back the green invaders, von Strab was reportedly MIA after he escaped in a stolen Land Speeder (how he did that remains unknown), which made the imperial authorities think he tried to escape and was killed by orks, a fitting end for him. However, this assumption would be proven wrong years later...

==The Third War of Armageddon: From Inept to Traitor==

When Thraka came back to Armageddon for a rematch against the Imperial forces (<strike>and his husbando Yarrick,</strike> {{BLAM|''*click* '''*BLAM!*''' HERESY!}})'' Imperial strategists expected to see massive fighting throughout the planet, due to the number of orks of this WAAAGH! dwarfing those brought in during the previous war. And yet, to everyone's surprise, Hive Archeon, one of the planet's biggest and most important hive cities, fell to the orks without a single shot fired.

This shocking event was soon to be proven to be Herman von Strab's return to the planet, [[HERESY|as he had allied himself with the orks]] to [[Extra Heresy|reclaim Armageddon as his own]]. To everyone else it would have been obvious that this ploy was allowed by Ghazghkull because the noble was a useful puppet that would be krumped good after the fight was over, [[derp|but von Strab genuinely believed the ork to be his ally]]. Von Strab then publicly announced his return on every channel he could get his hands on, [[FAIL|asking everyone to rebel against the Imperium in his name]], [[RAGE|making sure every single human on the planet and outside of it utterly hated his guts]] as the single biggest traitor imaginable since the [[Horus Heresy]]. This was something so unbelievably stupid, considering ''EVERY SINGLE ONE OF HUMANITY'S ARMED FORCES'' had come to defend Armageddon. Since the local nobles were losing power to actual military authorities since the last war, they were willing to work with the orks as well, so von Strab was able to use them to his advantage to introduce the xenos' forces into the hive through secret tunnels.

As the war kept going in the Imperium's favour, internal resistance movements and relief forces started liberating Hive Archeon, the orks began losing ground, and so von Strab began fearing more and more for his life. As described in the novel ''Annihilation Squad'', the court of von Strab had degenerated into debauchery and decadence, and the [[penal legion]] unit of the [[The Last Chancers|Last Chancers]] was sent to execute him, something very complicated considering the orks and the few human forces loyal to von Strab kept him safe. He was ultimately slain by Lieutenant Kage of the Last Chancers, who pulled the traitor into a lava pit with him as he (Kage, not von Strab) was in the process of being possessed by a daemon.

== On the Tabletop ==

Von Strab appears as an [[Ork]] [[apocalypse]] formation in 7th ed's Warzone: Armageddon. All it composed of was a lone Company Commander (Herman himself) and a 9-Nob mob. This makes him somewhat like [[Cypher]]: all Guard units now have Hatred against him, and every Guard Unit within 12" MUST charge his unit, so you better hope those Nobz have their klaws. He also counts as a controlled asset for his side, but becomes a controlled asset for the Guard's team if he ever dies. In addition, he can't grab an extra Strategic Asset for being an HQ.

== See Also ==

*'''[[Digganobz|Diggas]]''' - Another group of Humans that ended up working for the Orks.

[[Category: Warhammer 40,000]]

[[Category: Imperial]]

[[Category: Xenos]]

[[Category: Orks]]

{{Ork-Gitz}}

Iskandar Khayon

2020-09-08T09:53:59Z

2A02:1811:5180:A200:EC3D:29FD:FA1D:618: /* The Truth */

[[File:Iskandar Khayon.jpg|thumb|300px|Khayon in the cobalt blue of the Thousand Sons.]]
{{topquote|You have lost so much lore that I can barely comprehend where your ignorance ends and your innocence begins.|Iskandar Khayon, on the [[Inquisition]]}}

'''Iskandar Khayon''' is the Lord Vigilator of the [[Black Legion]] and one of the founding members. Formerly a Sorcerer of the [[Thousand Sons]], who know him as Khayon the Black due to his change of allegiance and perceived betrayal of his brothers, he is a member of the Ezekarion ([[Abaddon]]'s inner circle). The Black Legion calls him the Kingbreaker, as he apparently kicked Magnus' lazy ass to make him comply with Abaddon's plans. He has a multitude of other names and titles, most of which (he claims) are falsely attributed to him.

He's the narrator and main character of the novel ''[[Talon of Horus]]''.

==Pre-Heresy==
A [[Prospero]] native, Khayon experienced tragedy at an early age when his sister Itzara was attacked by a nasty psychic brain parasite which destroyed much of her brain tissue. After it became clear that she would never function again, he decided (in an attempt to keep some of her still alive) to hand her over to the [[Adeptus Mechanicus]], who were trying to create an advanced [[Machine Spirit]]. She survived the procedure, but due to the amount of secondary brains and mechanical attachments that were grafted onto her, [[Grimdark|she lost all of her sense of individuality]], becoming the Anamnesis, one of the most advanced machine-spirits ever created. She was installed in the Thousand Sons cruiser ''Tlaloc''.

Khayon served honorably in the [[Great Crusade]]. Unlike a lot of major Chaos characters, he wasn't really a notable in his legion, being a competent sorcerer and commander but otherwise just another run-of-the-mill legionary. As of the limited edition book 'The Abyssal Edge', part of the 'Sons of the Emperor' anthology, it is revealed that he was one of the Khenetai Blades, the Order of the Jackal, during the Crusade. He managed to escape the [[Burning of Prospero]], killing a Space Wolf champion by literally dismantling him at the molecular level and taking his axe, Saern. He was not, however, one of the Thousand Sons that Magnus took with him to the [[Sortiarius|Planet of Sorcerers]], and remained in the wreckage of Prospero until he was rescued by [[Lheorvine Ukris]], a [[World Eaters]] captain. The two became allies and (occasional) friends. Luckily he didn't meet the other World Eaters force that Khârn led to Prospero, which ended up hunting down some returned Thousand Sons and killing all but one.

He was at the [[Siege of Terra]], where he acquired a serious grudge against the [[Emperor's Children]] for leaving their positions during the attack on the Imperial Palace and murderfucking Terran civilians instead.

==Post-Heresy==
He eventually made his way to [[Sortiarius]] when [[Ahriman]] was in the process of enacting the Rubric, but (obviously) failed to stop him. He's understandably still cross about this, as the Rubric turned his oldest friend into an automaton. After the disaster, he fled in the ''Tlaloc'' along with a few allies and some [[Rubric Marines|Rubricae]], forming the Kha'Sherhan warband. Over the next few centuries, he roamed the Eye of Terror, working for various factions and acquiring an awesome collection of old Mechanicus battle robots. Because of the tiny size of his warband, he used these robots to prevent boarders from taking the ''Tlaloc''. It was during this time as well that he began binding daemons, using a deck of tarot cards to bind and summon them when necessary. It is unrecorded whether he ever [[Magic: The Gathering|traded with other sorcerers for rare cards]] or if he [[Yu-Gi-Oh|fought and defeated his opponents by challenging them to a children's card game, complete with his cards manipulating reality to represent themselves.]] The most potent of these was the Ragged Knight, an ancient Bloodthirster born from the wanton bloodshed of the [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Massacre_at_Béziers Massacre at Béziers].

==Founding the Black Legion==
When the former [[Justaerin]] [[Falkus Kibre]] sent out a call for aid with finding the ''[[Vengeful Spirit]]'', Khayon responded (secretly hoping that if he found the vessel, he could install the Anamnesis as its machine-spirit and claim it as his own). He, Kibre, and Lheorvine eventually found the vessel (and Abaddon) deep in the Eye of Terror. The news that [[Fabius Bile]] was trying to clone Horus finally got Abaddon off his ass. The ''Vengeful Spirit'', now with the Anamnesis as its machine-spirit, headed for Harmony, where Khayon psychically threw the now-abandoned ''Tlaloc'' at the planet, destroying the main Emperor's Children stronghold. During the [[Battle of Harmony|confrontation with Bile aboard the latter's cruiser]], he fought the clone-Horus alongside the rest of Abaddon's forces.

His exploits after the founding of the Black Legion aren't known exactly, and the line between falsehoods and facts is somewhat blurry (as Khayon himself notes.) He was present during the Seventh Black Crusade, where the Black Legion destroyed most of the [[Blood Angels]]. Immediately after the Legion's founding, he became Abaddon's go-to assassin. When he was sent after Thagus Daravek, however, he ran into difficulties, leading to a feud with the Lord of Hosts. After his fifth run at the final boss [[fail]]ed, Abbadon sent him to the former tomb of Horus, where a [[Black Templar]] strike-cruiser had crashed. Khayon found plenty of dead Templars and was confused by all the new gear. So he [[meme|Ate the brains and gained its knowledge]] to learn of all the new stuff happening back in reality. When rescuing a Lady Inquisitor she told them how the Imperium turned to shit with its new [[Lorgar|Religion.]] Much [[Rage]], [[Lulz]] and [[Fist_of_the_North_Star|Manly Tears]] were had. Hearing about Abbadon and his desire for Drach'nyen, Khayon didn't trust the messenger. But Abby was tempted by the idea of EPIC NEW GEAR and launched the first Black Crusade. Which Daravek also wanted to do and followed. Which brought Khayon and Daravek to fightan again. It turned out that [[Weeaboo Fightan Magic|Daravek had captured the remains of Khayon's familiar (which had part of his soul bound through it) and used it to subvert Khayon whenever they were close.]] Khayon was not amused and [[Rape|finished his job.]]

As of the Thirteenth Black Crusade, he managed to infiltrate Imperial space and land on Terra, where he turned himself in to the Inquisition on Abaddon's orders in order to personally tell the Emperor that the Imperium cannot win the war that is coming. Last mention at time of writing has him as a tortured prisoner of the Inquisition on Terra in 'Watchers of the Throne'.

==The Truth==
Khayon makes a number of claims in the novels that are dubious, which raises questions about him telling the truth.

Some of his claims include:
*Claiming to have forced Magnus to kneel before Abbadon. Now, while plenty of the [[Angron|Daemon Primarchs]] [[Magnus|have been]] [[Lorgar|fought, defeated, and threatened]] by normal or elite Astartes, they almost always have a reason for emerging triumphant, be it numbers, some special abilities or special gear. By Khayon's description, it sounds like he engaged and beat Magnus in a duel without any of the above, making his claim ring about as true as the time Ward wrote that his own [[Kaldor Draigo|Mary Sue]] took on and beat a Daemon Primarch. Hopefully like with Draigo, better writers will step in to fix this.
*That all the Daemon Primarchs kneeled before Abaddon. Never referenced outside of ADB's work, and the military might needed to take on and win against Daemon-worlds under control of the Primarchs living on them would've been far more than the Black Legion ever would've (or ever could have) possessed. Do remember that not only would they be fighting the other Traitor Marines, but also all of the Daemons living there who are far more powerful on their home turf and effectively immortal (which includes the Daemon Primarchs).
*Claiming that the Vengeful Spirit is filled with crystal ghosts including one of Sanguinius. This one sounds plausible, and wouldn't be the weirdest thing happening on the ship, but there's a simple problem: if it was true it would be impossible to move around at all. Massive amounts of deaths occur on it from its slaves alone, let alone the battles that have been fought there that the ship would be in a constant state of ejecting crystals just so that anyone could walk down a hallway (which would likely result in working their slaves to death like normal, which would only make the problem worse).
*That a Dark Eldar can live within the Eye of Terror. Like her Elders, Nefertari supposedly needed to "feed" far more often than usual, frequently deterioated quickly, and - perhaps the biggest reason she shouldn't be able to survive there - she isn't technically alive. A bullshit claim even if she was feeding on souls like she would in Commoragh just a lot more frequently, and it's about as believable as when the [[CS Goto|Black-Irish Leper]] did it.
*Speaking of his not!Girlfriend, the claim that you can bind someone's flesh to their soul and keep them alive after they've died and are in the midst of being devoured by a Chaos God. If this were true then the Eldar would be using this method all the time instead of stones, the Dark Eldar never would've allowed their psychic abilities to atrophy, and the Thousand Sons would use it to fix the Rubric Marines (either by binding their souls to other bodies, or by binding them to their armour in a way that allows them to say more than three words).

As you can see, most of his claims are a bit [[What|WAT]] until you begin to consider his audience. He is being interrogated by the Inquisition, [[Exterminatus|the most reasonable members of the Imperium when it comes to Chaos.]] Even if Khayon isn't lying, would the Inquisition believe anything he says anyway? If he's lying to be Abbadon's hype-man he certainly doesn't need to since the Imperium regards Abbadon as the greatest threat anyway.

Khayon might lie to convert someone or trick them to Chaos, but he might be simply delivering the final declaration of The Long War. He could be reciting the history of the Black Legion as he knows it, or he could be full of shit. Whichever is true Khayon himself declares he is telling the truth even when he would rather lie, and we'll likely never find out the truth anyway. It's also possible all of this could eventually be made canon in the other books, but the it'll be yet another case of shitty writing fucking everything up. There may also be the case that we have become so used to Chaos being shitty, petty and in general stupid evil that for once having a Chaos Sorcerer who doesn't act like a saturday morning cartoon villain come as something of unusual, arguably many of the things he did sound over the top, but in Khayon's defense we can say he doesn't approach some of the levels of mary-sueness [[Kaldor Draigo|seen in some ]][[Marneus Calgar|imperial characters]], in power level terms he and his team got consistently wrecked by a clone of Horus, and it remains to be seen how much effort he got to go through to make Magnus kneel, as nothing in that description says he went to write [[Mortarion|Magnymagic's name with a marker pen upon his heart.]]

==The Breakdown==
'''Reasons why Iskandar is cool:'''

1. Despite having the power and knowledge to become a Warlord in his own right, he stays truly loyal to his lord Abaddon because of his deep belief in the righteousness of The Long War. Where most Chaotic underlings scheme and jockey for dominance, Iskandar still believes in justice, honor, and loyalty, as do many within the Black Legion, and he has been shown to take care of his relatives, friends and minions.

2. He's "evil" by most human reckoning, but his perspectives and morals are consistant enough that he avoids the Cartoon Villain Syndrome that plagues so many depictions of Chaos Astartes. Yeah, he'll throw humans to a torturous death, but he's watched his entire world and almost every mortal on it die in agony. Yeah, he's kind of a lapdog to Abaddon, but you can see his resentment for his broken legion and his disgust at the petty squabbles the legions now war over. He's evil, but you can understand and sympathize with the man.

3. He actually uses tactics. Most sorcerers' approach to combat is to boil someone's insides or throw doombolts. Iskandar gets creative. When he can he'll spend months in advance laying traps, sabotaging minds, weakening infrastructure. It's like the best parts of Raven Guard and Alpha Legion doctrine backed by the psychic might of a sorcerer lord. In this sense he is more of a tactician who also conveniently happens to have access to psychic powers to increase his tactical options over a regular tactician, [[Bale|after a ]][[Sindri|long ]][[Crull|string ]][[Firaeveus_Carron|of ]][[Nemeroth|chaos ]][[Azariah Kyras|losers]] it's actually refreshing to see someone from the red team getting shit done for once without the need of [[Abaddon|plot armor]].

4. Using his powers for complex stuff requires serious work while sat in a very uncomfortable pose. He has to sit there the whole time, even in the warp where time can be very [[Eldrad|dickish.]] And when it's done he has to recuperate quite a long time in some cases. Unable to even drink water. Makes you wonder how he supposedly took down Magnus.

5. He's an elegan\t g\entleman able to charm a smile out of an inquisitor.

6. That! Bitchin'! Helm!

'''Reasons why Iskandar is also a [[Mary Sue]]:'''

0. He is always around when the important shit happens, [[Psyker|even if he's on the wrong ship.]]

1. He's a Legionnaire who defeated and humiliated his own Primarch. [[Butthurt|Off screen.]]

2. He has a Yu-Gi-Oh style deck of Tarot cards with bound daemons he can summon, which includes greater daemons like Bloodthirsters, and when he's finished he can banish them easily. [[Rage|Yes, a SORCERER has a pet bloodthirster...]][[If the Emperor had a Text-to-Speech Device| Maybe he challenged Magnus at Paradox-Billiards-Vostroyan-Roulette-Fourth-Dimensional-Hypercube-Chess-Strip Poker?]]

3. His hetero-lifemate NOT!girlfriend is a [[Dark Eldar]] [[Scourges|Scourge]] (read: an edgy elf with angel wings) who can solo whole squads of marines. She, an Eldar, can live with him INSIDE THE EYE OF TERROR just because. He also manages to prevent Slaanesh from eating her by "binding her soul to her flesh". In itself this is stupid because it raises the question of why the Sons don't find a way to restore the Rubric Marines in a similar manner, or why the Eldar as a whole don't do this. [[Ynnead|No, having your soul go to a god you made isn't the same thing]] as making your body immortal while permanently stopping a different god from eating you (especially if you accomplish this while they're trying to eat you). It makes the Ynnead gambit entirely pointless. [[Lulz|Any crashing sounds you hear are Cegorach and Tzeentch rolling on the floor with laughter as a Chaos Sorcerer has the key to saving the Eldar race.]]

4. [[wat|Managed to befriend a daemon.]] Unlike most familiars who betrayed their masters at Prospero Khayon's stayed loyal and became a teleporting daemon wolf who, again, can solo whole squads of marines, until it was destroyed by Horus' clone.

5. His ship has a chick in a stasis tube serving as a machine spirit, but also controling whole armies of Mechanicus robots, did we mention she is his imouto?

6. He has a [[Katanas are Underpowered in d20|super-force sword made from shards of Sanguinius's sword and crystal-ghost]] that cuts through everything (including a power axe and the terminator armor behind it,) because it's awesome. [[Wat|It even cuts through reality so he can walk through the warp, while in the actual warp anyway.]] [[Derp|Yes a warp sorcerer living in the warp uses a super-sword to walk through the super warp.]]

7. He's an <s>elegan\t g\entleman</s> [[Chaos Space Marine]] able to charm a smile out of an inquisitor.

8. Being the second-most powerful sorcerer among the [[Thousand Sons]] after Ahriman, [[Mary Sue|(and possibly even more powerful seeing as how he supposedly took down Magnus) means he is the most powerful native Prosperine Sorcerer alive.]]

9. [[Just as planned|Abaddon lured Khayon to the Vengeful Spirit, possibly all to get Khayon's sister to drive the thing.]] [[Lulz|Khayon, the one Thousand Son not worshipping Tzeentch, is an extra in Abaddon's plan for a naked chick ship-valet. Any crashing you hear is Tzeentch rolling on all the floors laughing, shipgirls anyone?]]

10. He kills Space Wolves in melee, then when he gets tired just does it by thinking, admittedly he is still a Space Marine and a talented swordsman from the Thousand Sons, so he could kill another space marine feasibly. That or by this point we are clearly seeing [[Archaon|the power of anime on this list.]]

11. He psychically "tugged" his own ship while simultaneously navigating Abaddons dream boat through hell for months straight, only to fling it like a dart out of hell into the planet below and deep impact the entire emperors children legion present (some 20 times the size of the new black legion) in an extinction level event. If true this would put him on the same level as Magnus in terms of psychic power, if he isn't above him. This one is almost assuredly complete horseshit because if it was true, then Abaddon would've had him do the same to Cadia a long, long time ago.

{{Chaos-Marines}}

[[Category:Black Legion]]
[[Category:Thousand Sons]]

Star Trek

2020-09-07T18:35:22Z

2A02:1811:5180:A200:EC3D:29FD:FA1D:618:

{{cleanup}}
[[File:Enterprise.jpg|thumb|500px|right|If you aren't already hearing the theme song you might not belong here.]]

{{Topquote|Space: the final frontier. These are the voyages of the starship Enterprise. Its five-year mission: to explore strange new worlds. To seek out new life and new civilizations. To boldly go where no man has gone before!|James T. Kirk, <s>third</s> captain of the starship USS Enterprise}}

'''''Star Trek''''' is a multimedia science-fiction series and one of the cornerstones of nerdy media properties (in fact, Klingon is the most learned fictional language, and the only one to surpass Tolkien's elvish in popularity), and one of the few to crossover into mainstream popularity (alongside ''[[Star Wars]]'', ''[[Doctor Who]]'' and a few others). It's also one of the longest-running science fiction franchises, as it began when the the first episode of The Original Series aired in 1966, and since then has had over 50 years of geek history spanning several generations. Needless to say, it's had a huge influence on all things sci-fi, and, by extension, [[/tg/]].

Originally, ''Star Trek'' was [[noblebright]] beyond noblebright and, in many ways, was the polar opposite of ''[[Warhammer 40,000|Warhammer 40K's]]'' [[grimdark]]. The more recent reboot films, however, have taken a much, ''much'' more grimdark tone, which is delightfully [[skub]]tastic.

== Games ==
There's been plenty of tabletop games and [[/v/|vidya gaems]] featuring ''Star Trek'' without being merchandising bullshit (see: themed ''[[Monopoly]]'' sets), including one of the earliest action multiplayer wargame: ''Netrek''.

*'''''Star Trek: Adventure Gaming in the Final Frontier''''' (1978) The very first Trek tabletop [[RPG]]. Written by, I shit you not, Michael Scott. Groggy (grokky?) as all hell, and due for an OSR.
* '''''[[Starships & Spacemen]]''''' (1978 1e, 2013-present 2e) This was an attempt by a guy named Leonard Kanterman to make his own Star Trek RPG but since he didn't hold the license he had to alter the names and fudge the rules a bit so he wouldn't get sued. It appeared and died fairly quickly. It was later purchased by [[Goblinoid Games]] and heavily reworked to work more like their other game, [[Labyrinth Lord]] but different enough that converting things back and forth should take a minute or two longer than just dropping them in. The 2e version has some decent third party material at least.
* '''''[[Star Fleet Battles]] (SFB)''''' (1979-) The crunchiest starship combat game you're ever going to find outside of a computer. Based on the original series and not any of the later series, for licensing reasons. Takes some liberties with the setting, which (combined with the aforementioned licensing) is why "''Star Trek''" isn't actually in the title. It's had its own video game spinoff in the form of Starfleet Command. The series died when the last company owned by Interplay broke up in the early 2000s.
* '''''Star Trek: The Role Playing Game''''' (1982-1989) Made by [[FASA]], essentially ''[[Traveller]]''-lite, or a happier, shinier ''[[Rogue Trader]]''. Hasn't aged terribly well, what with having been made when the only canonical ''Star Trek'' materials to work with were the original and animated series, the first four films, and a couple of now non-canon novels. If you try to dust it off, expect tons of conflict with the rest of the show. Died as they were trying to update it for ''TNG'', because Paramount's corporate suits (surprise, surprise) had no idea what an RPG actually entailed and were worried about violence, and getting their cut, and... oh you know the drill by now. Welcome to the 80's.
* '''''Star Trek: Starship Tactical Combat Simulator''''' (1983) FASA designed this, so it feels like ''[[Battletech]]'' but not as good.
* '''''Prime Directive''''' (1993-2008) The most successful tabletop RPG line (but that's not saying much), it's actually still in print. Produced by Amarillo Design Bureau, so again no direct name-dropping of "''Star Trek''." Lasted as long as it did by constantly evolving, in Borg-like fashion, to adapt to the current zeitgeist. Has had 4 editions, with the second using [[GURPS]], the third using [[Wizards of the Coast|d20]], and the fourth [[d20 Modern]].
* '''''Star Trek [[Card_Game|CCG]]''''' (1994-2007, 2011-2014, 2013-2015, 2018-) There's been a few of these, most notably the games released by [[Decipher]], but never globally popular. They also suffered from game balance problems from fans wanting their fave character, but needing extra rules for their quirks. There's also the problem of putting numbers to character stats, such as one game that asserted that [[Heresy|Picard having about twice the integrity of a Klingon pig]]. Later versions are "deck-building" games to try to cash in on the popularity of ''[[Dominion]]'' and ''[[Thunderstone]]''. And now virtual CCGs are the order of the day.
* '''''Star Trek: The Next Generation Role Playing Game''''' (1998-2000) The next attempt, made by Last Unicorn Games. Won an Origins Award for best new game. Has a lot of extraneous skills, as expected of a 90's RPG, but does a good job of capturing the feel of the show. Includes core books for Deep Space Nine and The Original Series, with a planned Voyager book never released. Tons of fan material is available, including books for Enterprise, Voyager, and even the Captain Pike era. Authors of the original game have also finished and released adventures and sourcebooks online. Died an untimely death.
* '''''Star Trek Red Alert''''' (2000) A Diskwars game themed to ''Star Trek''.
* '''''Star Trek Roleplaying Game''''' (2002-2005) When [[Decipher]] had the CCG license, they decided, "What the hell, let's make an RPG, too." Some of the authors of the Last Unicorn Games RPG worked on this game. The systems are similar but different enough that they aren't compatible. The fluff focuses more on the Voyager era. A well made game but it's forgotten for a reason.
* '''''Star Trek Online''''' (2010-) An [[MMORPG|MMO]]. Decent gameplay mechanics, especially starship combat. Storyline leaves something to be desired, especially when the ostensibly [[Noblebright|peaceful]] Federation trades shots at least once with every other faction in the galaxy. Is also sadly being screwed over by CBS who keeps retconning the series thus forcing the game to bend more and more unnaturally to fit in the new canon. Still, it's solid enough for an MMO and you can hit max level quick enough to get into the real meat of the game and join a Fleet (their version of a guild) and blow shit up.
* '''''Call To Arms: Star Trek''''' (2011) [[Mongoose_Publishing|Mongoose]]'s license for ''Babylon 5'' expired, so they collaborated with Amarillo Design Bureau (the ''Star Fleet Battles'' guys), re-themed the game to Star Trek along with improving the system to make it more nifty. Less micro-management than SFB, and ships get some cinematic feats.
* '''''Star Trek: Expeditions''''' (2011) Ignore the tie-ins to the movie, Reiner Knizia designed this. Explore the gameboard, flip over missions, try to have the proper crew to get victory points.
* '''''Star Trek: Fleet Captains''''' (2011) Tile flipping, exploring, and spaceships fighting over resources
* '''''Star Trek: Attack Wing''''' (2013-) [[WizKids]] license the flightpath system from [[Fantasy Flight Games]] and adds ''Star Trek'' to the mix, [[Skub]] ensues. The game has been consistently plagued with balance issues, to the point that the rules errata is more than ten times longer than the actual rules. The actual current rules for things like the Borg special movement and fighter squadrons are completely different than the rules as written.
* '''''Star Trek: Ascendancy''''' (2016-) 4X table top boardgame from GaleForce9. Most of the races are represented, though the base set only has the Federation, Klingons and Romulans. Andorians, Vulcans, Cardassians and Ferengi can be purchased as expansions. There is even a Borg expansion that turns the game semi-coop as everyone tries real hard not to be assimilated.
* '''''Star Trek Adventures''''' (2017-) The latest attempt at an RPG, by Modiphius. It also comes with a whole range of miniatures of the various crews from the show. Runs on a similar engine to the creator's ''[[Conan the Barbarian]]'' which both makes sense, since they're both pulpy storytelling, and is hilarious, given the total tonal mish-mash between the two. Task resolution is generally done via a mixture of six attributes and six disciplines, which are added together, then used as a modifier for a d20 roll. For instance, combat is usually handled by the Security discipline, but hand-to-hand combat would use Fitness or Daring, while firing a phaser or other long-arm would use Control, and shipborne weapons Insight or Reason. In addition to combat stuff, players might solve problems by obtaining information and sciencing the shit out of it. They also have various Values that can be tapped for additional dice, a shared pool of Momentum all players can spend to gain advantages and add to by overboosting on success, and a pool of Threat that they can give the GM rather than burning Momentum, which he can then spend to make the situation degrade. It's a fun system, but it requires a GM who can wrap their head around the idea of an evolving situation rather than a set encounter to really click, which can be hard for GMs who're used to the ''D&D'' model.

== So why should I care? ==
Because between them, these six TV series and their assorted spinoff movies, books, etc. can provide inspiration for any sci-fi game you could care to run. If you want light-hearted action, look at the sort of things that happened in ''TOS'' or ''DS9'' to get the crew into some dangerous situation. If you want a charismatic villain, look at Gul Dukat or the Borg Queen. More serious issues are often handled with various degrees of success. While many science fiction series deal with a wide range of topics, Star Trek does so as aspects of a greater world. Like [[Tolkien]] is to fantasy it's a prime gateway drug to science fiction and especially science fiction which is more than "action movie IN SPACE!"

Not to mention in any sci-fi RPG with remotely free-form rules you're likely to encounter ''Star Trek'' fanboys, so you might as well know what they're talking about. The unholy spawn of a Trekkie and a [[Furry]] is known as a [[Chakat]], and you should fear it.

At its best ''Star Trek'' is thoughtful, optimistic futurism with a positive human element and brings you to strange new worlds in the grand tradition of speculative fiction which is accessible to even the layman. At its worst ''Star Trek'' is arrogant, smug, hypocritical, one-sided, preachy, dull and sloppy.

== Setting ==
Here's the Cliff's Notes on ''Star Trek''. A couple of general warnings; firstly, ''Star Trek'' likes to ''really'' take its "racial themes" bits just a little too far. Second, despite this, it's rare for an entire race to be completely irredeemable the way many fictional aliens are: there are heroic and sympathetic characters from nearly every race listed below, able to put more-positive spins on their racial themes. Thirdly, aside from very occasional appearances by [[H.P. Lovecraft|aliens who are so bizarre that humankind can barely comprehend them]], all of the aliens look like dudes with rubber masks on (because they are). In real life, this was because there was no budget for anything else, but in-universe it's been explained by some kind of [[Old Ones|Precursor]] race who seeded all of the planets with their broadly humanoid DNA, and every race evolved slightly differently from there. There isn't much [[fluff]] on what these precursors were like, and some of it was contradictory, and Gene Roddenberry didn't like the idea (although he still had to work with the rubber forehead stuff). The good news for fa/tg/uys who like [[homebrew]] is that this makes it fairly easy to write [[d20 system]] rules for all of the races - after all, most ''D&D'' races are just humans with rubber masks on...

=== A Composite Creation ===
This is a general note that one should consider: Star Trek was created in pretty much the opposite way as The Hobbit and The Lord of the Rings. Tolkien worked out a bunch of linguistic stuff and general history of Arda in his spare time over the course of years, then decided to use that as the basis for some stories that he eventually gave to some publishers which in the end sold quite well.

Roddenberry, by contrast, pitched a very broad general idea (it's the future, things are good, we got some guys on a ship exploring space; a "wagon train to the stars") to the networks and eventually Lucy from ''I love Lucy'' made it happen. Roddenberry then worked with a variety of writers and actors (and some later on) who added to this rough skeleton of an idea in a process that would continue on to this day.

This is not to knock either approach, but both have their advantages and disadvantages. In regards to Star Trek, a franchise which relies mostly on an episode of the week format (until recently apparently) that's been going on for more than half a century this means that the canon is a fucking mess. There were numerous people at the helm and many of them had often very different ideas about what should be done that were just thrown out to see what stuck, many of which were contradictory and some of which we'd frankly rather forget (Data being possessed by a mask, for instance). In general fans and fluff writers have been spending a whole lot of time trying to straighten things out and much of the lore is basically a rough consensus of what people like and what fits in with it. Later series got more systematic about this, but there are still points of contention and a lot of flat out contradictions due to its scattershot nature.

You know, like [[/co/| comic books]].

=== Factions ===
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'''The Federation'''
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[[File:Federation_Ships.jpg|thumb|500px|left|Starfleet's ships of the Line (original universe/canon)]]
Might as well talk about that main faction. The United Federation of Planets is what the [[Tau]] think they are. Its backstory is that in the distant future of the 1990s, [[God-Emperor of Mankind|übermensch]] [[Space Marines|created by genetic engineering]] began conquering the Earth. The [[Imperial Guard|normies]] fought back and won through sheer numbers, cryogenically freezing the Augments and kicking them out of Earth, but the damage and mass political unrest of World War III got half the planet nuked. This was why genetic engineering was banned. Fortunately, in 2063, a <s>drunken asshole</s> heroic visionary named Zefram Cochrane created humanity's first warp drive (though it functioned based on the principle that gravity bends space-time, and was therefore more akin to an Alcubierre drive than anything that's dependent on the [[Warp]]) and made first contact with the Vulcans. The Vulcans eventually helped humanity rebuild and overcome poverty, disease, war and hunger. With its Earthly problems solved, man turned to the stars and found out its three closest neighbors were [[Imperium of Man|racist xenophobic dicks trying to murder each other]]. Since any war between them would've swept up puny little Earth and gotten it glassed, humans decided to force their neighbors to sit down and talk things out. Incredibly, it worked, and the United Federation of Planets was born.

The Federation is a commie [[noblebright]] hippieland society with a post-scarcity economy and a strong democratic government ([[Mary Sue|pretty much Roddenberry's idea of utopia]]). As a result, Federation citizens work not because they have to, but because they want to. However, despite their advanced technology, transhumanism, that is intentionally making [[Space Marines|SPESS MEHREENS]] and mutants like the infamous antagonist Khan Noonien Singh, is illegal.

The Federation's Navy is almost always called Starfleet. It's a mix between a military, a coast guard and a space agency, and usually rates scientific research as a higher priority than defense. One of its quirks is that it doesn't subscribe to the "bigger is better" policy used in most [[Warhammer 40K|sci-fi]], and even by most of the other ''Star Trek factions''. If the Federation ''does'' make a large ship, it's because they want it to have a daycare, swimming pool and ice cream bar. If they want a warship, they'll take a little gunship half the size of a modern day destroyer and pack it with enough antimatter nukes and guns to exterminate a solar system. In some cases, especially when dealing with ships from several centuries into the future, the ship is bigger on the inside than on the outside [[Creed|allowing it to hide a vast array of powerful armaments, ''space-bending'' equipment, and even whole planetary landscapes]]. They can get away with this because they out-tech almost everyone else by a country mile. The reason for the series' infamous "technobabble" is that <s>even ''they'' don't know everything their tech can do!</s> their technology is always evolving, and they know it so well that they can often use it in ways that even the original in-show design schematics did not intend.

In theory, Starfleet follows a rule called the "Prime Directive", which says that you're not allowed to interfere with low-tech races ("low-tech" being defined as "not having invented the warp drive", since warp technology apparently follows naturally from the laws of physics) or else things like turning the locals into Nazis might happen. The Original Series talked about this rule all the time, and Captain Kirk threw it aside whenever there was a sexy alien babe in sight. From ''TNG'' onward, it tended to instead be brought up whenever a hack writer needed a reason for the heroes to ''not'' instantly resolve a given problem with their superior technology or a way of making our heroes look like assholes for following it rigidly (yes, we could save this species from extinction but that would be interfering with the cosmic plan!), though there were a few good episodes that took it seriously.

Some of the more important member races are:

'''Founding members:'''
* [[Humans]]: You know 'em, you love 'em. Comprise seemingly 90% of Starfleet for reasons in no way related to the cost of makeup/CGI.
* [[Vulcan]]: The Original [[Eldar|Space Elves]], very emotional, especially during "pon'farr" (see below), who followed the teachings of an enlightened sage and embraced logic and rationalism after their emotions nearly led to them [[Slaanesh|wiping themselves out]]. They are what the average race of fantasy elves think they are, except on ''Enterprise'' because the writers wanted to artificially inject tension into the show (some of that was retconned to be a Romulan plot). Occasionally enter a state called "pon'farr," where they need to either [[Dark Eldar| fuck something half to death]], kill it with the nearest sharp object, or die of a brain aneurysm to let out all that pent-up emotional tension. Fa/tg/uys may recognize this as the sensation they feel every time [[Games Workshop]] puts out a new army book. Pretty bro-tier overall.
* Andorians: Blue dudes with antennae and constant fits of passion, the polar opposite of Vulcans and their one time foes. Pretty much fa/tg/uys, right down to the romantic streak, in the technical sense. Also, they live underground on a diet of meatbread and rage. Most of what defined them happened in Enterprise as they rarely showed up in the TNG-era, and even then did so as set dressing, allegedly because one of the showrunners hated their antennae and banned anyone from using them.
* Tellarites: Space [[Dwarf|Dorfs]]; like insulting everyone and arguing a lot (no, really, petty insults are considered a polite gesture in Tellarite culture), mostly because the very first tellarite ever shown in the series got in an argument with Spock's dad and now it's their whole racial thing. “Sarek said something in a scene once that was meant to demonstrate that he was stand-offish and kinda rude, but we like Sarek so it's now the defining attribute of this species.” It's all in good fun you understand, your confidence in your ideas and actions should be sturdy enough to withstand honest assessment and critique.
'''Notable Additional Members:'''
* Betazoids: Invariably attractive humanoid aliens with telepathic powers. Half-betazoid, half-humans apparently only have "empathic" powers, so they are well-regarded by Starfleet captains for their ability to point out the obvious and fill out the tight bodygloves that make up the Starfleet uniform in a pleasing manner, especially since theirs seem to come in a custom cut for reasons entirely unrelated to Roddenberry's erection. Their homeworld is like dropping a really hippie college and Space Vegas into a blender. They were taken over during The Dominion war because Earth or Vulcan would be seen as bullshit due to their large post Borg attack defense fleets/ship yards. While the writers would have to actually add new characters for the Andorians and Tellarites(such as Ambassadors for a government in exile). So Betazoid took the hit to raise the stakes.
* Trill: Originally a one-off race introduced as a sapient parasite that possesses and controls a barely, or even unintelligent humanoid host, they were radically reworked in ''Deep Space Nine'', right down to losing their rubber foreheads in favor of spots. Now, the host is itself an intelligent humanoid, and some, but not all, of their kind are able to willingly merge with a symbiont (because someone can't spell) that allows them to access a mixture of the memories and personalities of all previous hosts, though in a way that, theoretically, enhances the host's personality rather than destroying it or subsuming it. Then, when they die, they can pass on the symbiont to another host, theoretically, one they mentored. They went from having a rubber forehead to some spots because Terry Farrell had a allergic reaction to the make-up.
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'''The Klingon Empire'''
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[[Image:Batleth.jpg|thumb|right|A Bat'Leth (sword of honor), one of several types of Klingon bladed weapons. Frequently mocked IRL for being a poorly designed weapon.]]
[[Commissar|''"It is a good day to die!"'']]

The Federation's main rival and (movie era and afterward) the quintessential ''Star Trek'' race of lumpy foreheaded aliens. Originally they were a rough analog to the Russians (though they took some elements from [[Communism|communist China]]) in a rough cold war allegory with the Federation (even though the Federation are as commie as they come, though admittedly much of that came around in the TNG era). Their defining feature was that they were militaristic and imperialistic while the Federation was scholarly and respected liberty. This gradually moved more and more into them becoming Imperial Japan/[[Vikings]] In SPESSS obsessed with honor, fighting and dying honorably in battle while worshiping at the altar of [[Sigmar|warrior Jesus]], even as they turned from the Federation's bitter enemies into that friend who's fun to be around when he's not getting into drunken bar fights. You see shades of it during the movie era and it became more and more prominent through ''TNG'', culminating in ''DS9''. Do not make the mistake of thinking that Klingons are nothing more than barbaric savages, however; with Worf being part of the crew, and with ''DS9'' dealing with Klingon politics an awful lot we can see Klingon society as it truly is. Even so, they do often wander into self-parody territory.

The Klingons, in their current iteration, are a feudal society ruled by a council made up of the most powerful families. Klingon society holds very little value on things such as currency and material gain (which results in the Klingon empire [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q65l7RHUx2A having a very simplistic understanding of economics]), believing that anything you acquire without some form of blood, sweat and/or tears on your part is a pathetic and dishonorable way of going about things, much the same way many cultures used to hurl abuse at merchants and bankers. Another thing to keep in mind is that a Klingon's reputation is literally everything. This can be easily seen in the episode "The House Of Quark" where dying honorably can literally change the outcome of an entire noble house, later when the Grand Council is visibly disgusted at D'Ghor. No respectable Klingon uses ''money'' to defeat his opponents. And no respectable Klingon would be so eager to perform an execution of an unarmed Ferengi in what was supposed to be an honorable duel. Klingons are still capable of being cunning and crafty, however, and having a high diplomacy score is viewed as honorable as they still have examples of cunning and clever heroes tricking boorish and stupid monsters.

[[Warhammer 40000|Klingons often carry swords into battle in an age of energy beam guns]]. In-universe, this is less suicidal than it sounds in the context of boarding actions and tight starship corridors. The Bat'leth is actually a rather shitty weapon. The Mek'leth is noted to be better in most situations. They use the same Disruptor weapons as the Romulans, and at one point used similar starship designs. While is explained as the result of a temporary and unholy alliance, given the eventual animosity between the two races, it was just an excuse to reuse props on a limited budget.

The Klingons are tied with the Vulcans and the Borg as being the most prominent and recognizable non-human species in Star Trek. Beloved of the Internet and the general public, to the point that there are published books like "A Klingon Christmas" in the world. The Klingons have their own constructed language. If you are ever worrying that you might not be a nerd, learning Klingon will solve that problem for you. Please note that this is in general considered by experts to be pathognomonic of [[Chris-Chan|autism]]. You have not experienced Shakespeare until you hear it in the original Klingon.
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'''The Romulan Star Empire'''
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''"It's always chess with the Romulans"''

You know those [[Eldar|Vulcans]]? Well a few thousand years ago, as their planet was ravaged by war, some of them turned to intense emotional control and logic to tame their murderous passions, while most others left the planet altogether, founding a colony on the planet Romulus and dubbing themselves [[Dark Eldar|Romulans]]. Since said planet shares a name with a mythical figure known for founding [[Roman Empire|a city which built a vast empire]], and they had warp drive while those around them did not, you probably know that they turned to building an empire of their own. They hold the second place of prominence as immediate rivals to the Federation. Comically, they actually have better emotional control than the average Vulcan, since they gene-engineered most of their problems away years ago, and don't have to deal with the emotional blowback from pon'farr. The downside is that they lost some of their cousins' niftier powers, like mind-reading and being able to transfer their soul into another person for safekeeping. Although Star Trek Online also revealed that their trip to Romulus was a terrible ordeal, and their gene-engineering was taking during that time resulting in them losing most emotions save for bitterness of being "forced out".

The difference between the Klingons and the Romulans is basically the difference between Gork and Mork, or Khorne and Tzeentch. Klingons will fight you up front with simple brute force. Romulans are sneakier guys, preferring to fight you when you're not looking with spies, cloaked ships and complex plots behind the scenes and playing the long game. There is a lot of political infighting among them, though where the Klingons would duel to the death Romulans would seek to discredit their rivals, have them die in unfortunate "accidents" or disappear. This difference has left both Romulans and Klingons with a big hate-boner for each other, to the Romulans the Klingons are crude brutish barbarians and to the Klingons the Romulans are a pack of scheming cowardly weaklings.

Like the Klingons, they served as a rough Cold War allegory. In this case, they were rough analogs to Communist China (as seen by 1960s Americans), a distant horde of inscrutable and potentially dangerous Orientals who generally were unseen and projecting vague menace, but when encountered face-to-face could pack quite a punch indeed: the first major Interstellar War that Star Trek Earth fought was with the Romulans, which was fought entirely in space with neither side ever seeing the other face to face. Afterward, they set up a 'Neutral Zone' between the Federation and the Romulan Empire that no one even tried to cross for a century. From the Original Series onward, they frequently squabble and bicker with the Federation, before joining forces with them to fight the Dominion in ''Deep Space Nine'' and having their government devastated in ''Nemesis''.

In one of the two alternate universes created by J.J.Abrams movies, the so-called "Prime Universe", Romulus itself got caught in a supernova as part of the Abramsverse's backstory. ''Picard'' has revealed that Starfleet was going to help evacuate Romulus before the nova hit, but then some rogue androids destroyed the shipyards that the rescue fleet was being built at, so the Federation shrugged, flipped the Romulans the bird, and let them get blown up. The Romulan Star Empire collapsed in the aftermath, with the surviving Romulans are now scattered across half the galaxy. Most of the former Romulan colonies are now officially governed by the Romulan Free State, but their ability to exert their authority is implied to be limited at best and non-existent at worst. The Neutral Zone, in particular, collapsed into near lawlessness. Some of them have got hold of a Borg cube and are presumably up to some nefarious shit with it.
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'''The Ferengi Alliance'''
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[[Image:GW_Ferengi.jpg|thumb|left|A typical ferengi engaged in typical ferengi activities]]
{{topquote|A Ferengi without profit is no Ferengi at all.|Eighteenth Rule of Acquisition}}

Introduced in ''TNG's'' early days as the villains for the series, and what [[/pol/]] thinks Jews are. Some Jewish people have actually complained about their being subliminally Jewish and thus anti-Semetic, specifically mentioning that they were money-hungry, lascivious, and ugly, and their large ear lobes were stand-ins for the sterotypical Jewish nose, based on an old medieval stereotype that was enforced to prevent them owning land or assets and ended up sticking around long after the fact (i.e. ([https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/made-by-history/wp/2018/08/14/science-fictions-anti-semitism-problem/?noredirect=on we're not shitting you] but also they have a valid gripe).

The idea was to make a caricature of capitalism as a contrast with the techno-communist Federation. This might have worked if these were not [[FAIL|''TNG's'' early days]]. Instead, they overshot the mark by a light year or so, on top of other bad decisions, and you got a race of short, big-eared, [[goblin]]-like losers about as threatening as a grumpy pug. (Gene wanted to make an evil short race as big evil races were overplayed.) Over the first and second seasons they tried to make these guys threatening, but they fell flat on their face every time; eventually the writers just said "fuck it" and the Ferengi got demoted to comic relief species, and their status as terrible enemies was demoted to propaganda designed to scare the Federation while the Ferengi government tried to figure out what to make of a species that rejected the acquisition of wealth as a goal. The Ferengi had some good moments in the later seasons of ''TNG'', but most of the best stuff that fleshed them out came from ''DS9'', which had an [[awesome]] Ferengi bartender named Quark as a major character. For an idea of what the Ferengi might have been like if the writers had their shit together, look up the Druuge of [[Star Control|Star Control II]] or the Magog Cartel from Oddworld.

Ferengi religion is only hinted upon in ''DS9'', but what is seen implies a simplistic system based on financial success. Ferengi all follow a rulebook/canon known as the Rules of Acquisition, which can be described as Ayn Rand IN SPACE and condensed into the form of Confucius' Analects. There are 285 of these, each a short piece of advice on how to stay in the black. Examples include "Peace is good for business," "War is good for business," "Never have sex with the boss's daughter," and "Dignity and an empty sack is worth the sack." The first (and most important) of these is "Once you have their money, you never give it back." Sometimes, the Ferengi Randian spirituality extends into outright interpretations of the afterlife: according to some, the afterlife consists of the Divine Treasury and the Vault of Eternal Destitution, which are respectively analogous to Heaven and Hell. Entrance into one or the other depends on one's business ventures at the time of death; those that were turning a profit are allowed to enter the Divine Treasury, and the rest are damned to the Vault.

Ferengi government is ruled over by a Grand Nagus, a mix between a <s>pope</s> chief rabbi and a CEO, and he basically treats his civilization like some sort of company, with citizens regarded as workers. Directly below him is the Ferengi Commerce Authority, a [[what|quasi-religious]] organization dedicated to ensuring that correct business practices were followed and correct moral behavior was shown (including keeping the proles in line) - of course, to the Ferengi, these are one and the same. The agents of the FCA are the Liquidators, who are essentially Inquisitors crossed with IRS auditors on steroids. Be afraid. Be very afraid.

Ferengi females have no rights and are mentioned as [[PROMOTIONS|not even being allowed to wear clothes]], which leads to [[That Guy|boorish behavior]] on the part of Ferengi towards just about any species. Of course, we see female Ferengi on the show who push that envelope, but it seems that overall "regressive" does not even begin to describe the gender relationships in their culture. Quark's mother, a social climber who marries the head of their government, begins pushing through a women's rights movement during DS9, which proves more successful as time goes on.
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'''The Borg Collective'''
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[[Image:Borg cube.jpg|300px|thumb|right|The Borg have assimilated and improved your [[d6|die]]. It always rolls six. Crap your pants, 'cause resistance is futile.]]
{{Topquote|We are the Borg. Lower your shields and surrender your ships. We will add your biological and technological distinctiveness to our own. Your culture shall adapt to service us. Resistance is futile.|The Borg's opening hail. This is not a boast or a brag, it's them simply explaining you how things are going to go down.}}
{{Topquote|One other thing. You may encounter Enterprise crew members who've already been assimilated. Don't hesitate to fire. Believe me, you'll be doing them a favour.|Picard going full [[grimdark]].}}

The Ferengi were utter failures as serious villains, so they needed something to fill that gap. Thus they made the Borg, an aggressive [[Tyranid|hive-minded]] collective of hyper-adaptive, [[Necron|regenerating]] cyborgs that assimilates entire species into itself in its attempt to improve and evolve. Shit, that's like coming up with [[Warforged]] while trying to replace [[Kender]].

In many ways, the Borg are the truest dark reflection of the Federation, and despite their name, they're not Swedish. While the Feds want you to join their little club on your own, to "add your culture to the galactic community," the Prime Directive means they will ultimately accept you turning them down, even if you have shit they really want. The Borg say "fuck that" and just absorb you. While the Federation believes everyone should work together [[Tau|for the greater good]], they still have a very strong sense of individualism and a culture of personal accomplishment (unless your individual belief happens to run counter to the Federation's principles anyway, in which case you're just WRONG because the Federation is the best). The Borg pool all their minds together into a massive collective consciousness in the pursuit of group perfection, becoming an almost-literal personification of techno-capital. The Federation is all about beauty and tranquility and all that hippie stuff, and their tech is eco-friendly and dolphin-safe. Borg [[Tyranids|strip mine entire planets and drain entire oceans]] in the name of growth and efficiency.

Your standard Borg [[Cubes|cube]] is a huge multi-kilometer [[Firaeveus Carron|metal box]] (yes, bigger than most [[Imperial Navy]] cruisers) able to go up against an entire Federation warfleet and win. That's right, one of their ships could threaten the entire Federation and [[Exterminatus]] Earth. When done right, [[Necron|they are a cold, calculating, nigh-unstoppable force, a threat to all life]] that wants to retain free and distinct personalities (although they will ignore a single person if not on an assimilation mission, as what they really want is to absorb whole civilizations). Apparently, in Picard's nightmare in ''First Contact'', the Borg assimilation process includes a surgical [[Grimdark|drill through the eye. While awake.]] Of all the stuff to come out of the TNG Era they are undoubtedly the most well recognized in mass pop culture.

Unfortunately the got a bad downgrade during ''Voyager'' (the Borg Queen blew up cubes full of tens of thousands of drones because a few of them have been severed from the Hive Mind), but even there they were frequently not to be messed with. One amusing thing to note for people that haven't watched ''TNG'': the Borg were actually only in six episodes (and three were breakaway drones) and one movie, yet they're arguably the franchise's most famous pure villains aside from Khan. Goes to show how good they were when written properly. Then in ''Voyager'' they get their shit completely pushed in when they discover a new race of extradimensional aliens which they label Species 8472, which were immune to being assimilated, and had to ask the Federation for help in dealing with them. [[Necron#Regarding_Fluff_Change_-_Sore_Butts_Everywhere.|Wait, this sounds familiar...]]
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'''The Cardassian Union'''
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Introduced in ''TNG'', they are third fiddle to the Klingons and the Romulans. If the Klingons are hypothetically-honorable techno-barbarian warriors and the Romulans are an empire of civilized and refined but sly and ruthless expansionists, the Cardassians are essentially scaly fascists re-enacting ''[[1984]]'' IN SPACE. Their trials announce the outcome at the beginning, and the defense attorney is executed if he wins. Also, THERE ARE FOUR LIGHTS!

Originally a race of peaceable, spiritual artists called the Hebitians (ironically not dissimilar to the Bajorans), modern Cardassia was born in hunger and desperation when their homeworld began to suffer simultaneous mass famine, pandemic, resource depletion, and ecological collapse. A military junta seized power, figuratively and literally auctioned off the soul of their culture through liquidating all the planet's art and religious artifacts into cold hard cash, and turned the Cardassians into the opportunistic imperialists they are today.

Despite being a whole lot weaker than the Federation, the Cardassians manage to hold their own, partly because what they lack in resources and raw power is made up for by a combination of intense cunning and high charisma stats. Compared to the equally deceptive Romulans, the Cardies are more likely to flash you a smile while tickling your ribs with a knife. They'll use any tool they can to gain the upper hand and while that often means unpleasant and terminal sessions in dark rooms, strip mined planets and the enslavement of entire species, they'll gladly become your bestest buddy if it would achieve their goals. Their intelligence service, the Obsidian Order, is also one of the most ruthlessly efficient organizations in the entire sector, managing to outscale the Romulan Tal Shiar when it comes to producing magnificent bastards and manipulating the politics of entire worlds to their advantage. Unlike the Romulans or the Klingons, they don't tolerate the sort of literal infighting that is rampant in both those states, that shit only serves to weaken '''GLORIOUS CARDASSIA''' and needs to be stamped out with ruthless efficiency. Exposing that someone who just happens to be your enemy as being a dangerous subversive is just a benefit, although this can result in both sides of a conflict shouting "For Cardassia!" as they charge each other. Sort of how Democrats and Republicans are both for America, yet oppose each other.

Cardassia has a very fluid hierarchical government, similar to the political realities of post-Stalin but pre-Collaspe Soviet Russia. Broadly speaking, there are three different facets of the government: the Central Command (which holds all the power) the Obsidian Order (who holds the least amount of power, but controls the most puppets) and the Detapa Council (similar to the [[High Lords of Terra]] and just as worthless). Cardassian society holds a very strict view of family, placing family just below the needs of the State in a vague approximation of Confucianism.

The State holds a semi-divine mythical status in the eyes of its citizens, with it being viewed as impossible for the State to ever make mistakes. The ideal Cardassian life was one of complete loyalty and servitude to the State and family, with the "repetitive epic," detailing how generations of Cardassians go on to serve both in exactly the same way over and over seen as the height of their culture. The Cardassian government is assumed to be omniscient, omnipotent, and benevolent by pretty much every Cardassian, with all Cadassians gladly giving of themselves to the State. Such was this level of belief that when Picard was tortured by the Obsidian order, the torturer saw nothing wrong with bringing his daughter to work because he was working for the State, and therefore the torture of Picard could never be disturbing or wrong. That's why their trials announce their sentences at the beginning and execute the defense attorney if he wins; their "trials" are more excuses to show off the power and infallibility of the State to the masses than actually determine guilt or innocence.

As far as plot significant activities went, they had a war with the Federation a few years before ''TNG'' which ended in the creation of a Demilitarized Zone between the two powers and (significant to ''Deep Space Nine'') abandoning the previously occupied planet of Bajor they had exploited for resources. After a disastrous war with the Klingons and The Maquis led to a popular revolution and overthrow of the existing government, one leader seized power, declared himself absolute leader, and joined the Dominion towards the end of ''DS9'', which was some serious bad news for the ''DS9'' crew.
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'''The Bajoran Republic'''
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The Bajorans are a species native to the Planet Bajor. They were, until shortly before the events of ''Deep Space Nine'', under a brutal occupation by the Cardassians who strip mined their planet. They had a fighting resistance which veered in and out of being considered terrorists and all in all were often represented as Palestinians IN SPEHSS. After that, they got their independence, although they're thinking about joining the Federation. The Bajorans have one system and are technologically backwards; the Federation is technically breaking the Prime Directive by interacting with them, but as they've spent years under the oppression of a warp-capable species, they can probably handle it. Also ''DS9'' proves that ancient Bajorans managed to travel at warp speeds to Cardassia using solar sails and an enormous amount of luck, which technically makes them a warp-capable species. The only reason why they are significant in terms of the politics of ''Star Trek'' is that they have a wormhole near their planet, which has some timey-wimey aliens living it that they worship as gods, and serves as the only way to get to or from the Gamma Quadrant that won't take decades, making it strategically priceless. Hilariously, this was discovered almost immediately after the Cardassians ''thought'' they'd extracted everything of value from the Bajorans and peace'd out, certain that the system was no longer worth the PR hit they were taking from it, only to get burned by some harsh seller's remorse. Also, their species has the oldest civilization (roughly a half-million years) of any major ''Star Trek'' race, and the wormhole aliens have gifted them some cool shit, like the Orb of Time.

The big thing that makes the Bajorans unique is that they actually have a serious religion going on -the human race is depicted as mostly non-religious. They're also probably one of the most accurate depictions of any highly religious alien race in a sci-fi franchise, because they are divided between the majority who interpret their religion as [[Noblebright|peace and love]], and a small but loud minority of bastards who interpret it as [[Grimdark|condoning acts of terrorism]]. A blatant attempt to simulate Israelis for criticism, although that can apply to many religions nowadays.
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'''The Dominion'''
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A vast empire which exists on the other side of the galaxy in the Gamma Quadrant. The Dominion is ruled over by a species of liquid shapeshifters called The Founders.(aka Changlings aka Odo's people) They have at their disposal a military composed of two genetically engineered species that worship the Founders as gods: the short and articulate Vorta who serve as ambassadors, bureaucrats, and political commisars and the big brutal Jem'hadar, who are vat grown, drug addicted, cannon fodder. These oversee a large number of vassal races, including (as of later seasons of ''DS9'') the Cardassians.

The Founders were once (according to them anyway) a peaceful, kind civilization of explorers who wished to see the galaxy, explore strange new worlds, and seek out new forms of life. Unfortunately, they did this in the wrong neighborhood, and quickly ran into species who did not tolerate others. The fact that the Founders were shapeshifters capable of mimicking almost anyone did not help either. Paranoia, mutual mistrust, and some very bad things eventually led to the Founders deciding "fuck this" and moving their planet into a nebula so nobody would bother them. So more or less, a [[Grimdark|grimmer]], [[Grimdark|darker]], counterpart to the Federation, but with spookier Real Aliens.

The Founders are obsessed with order and are both extremely racist and xenophobic, and believe that all alien life is inherently untrustworthy and evil, and the best thing to do is conquer/enslave them before they do the same to them. They don't care about the rights of "Solids", and will happily ignore any sense of decency when convenient. This can be seen when The Dominion runs a simulation of the Dominion dominating the Alpha Quadrant. When O'Brien is assaulted by a Jem'Hadar and severely beaten to the point of needing emergency teleportation to medical (the crime being "disrespectful"), the Founders (disguised as Federation Officers) do not press charges, and when Sisko comes barging in demanding answers, dismiss him with little concern about their own soldiers brutalizing citizens. Their overall ideology could be thought of as Qin legalism IN SPACE: people are inherently evil and the only way to make a better world is to impose order upon them through brute force from a position of absolute, unquestioned power.

The Founders, when not wandering around in various forms, tend to spend their time in a massive ocean literally made up of countless billions of Founders, something which is referred to as the Great Link. According to the Founders, this allows them to share information with each other and come to peaceful decisions. This is rapidly proved to be bullshit; when a separated-at-birth one of their own merged into the Great Link to share his memories of the Federation as peaceful and tolerant space hippies, not only did the Founders ignore his memories, but actively fucked with his mind in an attempt to turn him into a sleeper agent. And even if it weren't, it shows their hypocrisy through their willingness to share freedom and liberty among themselves while depriving all their various slaves and conquered peoples of the same.

The Founders are massive dicks, even to their own people. Failure among Jem'Hadar is rewarded with slow and painful death from deprivation of the drug they're created to need and their lifespans are incredibly short. To be even bigger dicks, the Vorta have no sense of taste and can't appreciate beauty. Not to make them better diplomats, but because they were raised from a primitive stone-age ape tribe, and the Founders think they shouldn't be ever allowed to forget that. (On the plus side, they did give the Vorta an immunity to poison that would make [[Mortarion]] himself jealous. [https://youtu.be/rACCZaBcq1g?t=1m29s Observe.]) This may also stem from their own neuroses: the Founders themselves have almost no bodily needs at all and require no nourishment, so they design their slaves to be like them. Notably, Vorta tend to come in [[Paranoia|packs of clones; a new one is activated when an old one dies, and they retain some memories and personality between "lives,"]] further hammering home how expendable they are to their makers.

And both races are literally engineered to love their makers for what they have done to them and worship and revere them as gods.

Continuing from the Cardassian Union section because the fate of both powers are linked in DS9. After joining the The Dominion. Everything was going seemingly for them and their leader Gul Dukat. They figured out how to bring down the minefield created by the Starfleet crew of Deep Space Nine to block access to the wormhole. (The Cardassians use its old name Terok Nor while in charge.)

However during the start of the sixth season the Founders learn that their not the only "gods" in the Galaxy. As the Sisko convinces the Bajoran Prophets to remove the Jem'Hadar reinforcements in transit. Forcing them to retreat back to Cardassian Space and Dukat's old friend Damar shoots Dukat's half Bajorion daughter Ziyal. This makes Dukat jump off the deep end as the sod loses his sanity and than goes full nutcase after his rehab transport is destroyed by the Jem Hadar, and ends up fighting an injured Benjamin Sisko after hiding inside some caverns on a hell planet for a few days.

After escaping he allows one of the evil wormhole aliens to possess him, kills Jadzia Dax, forgives Damar for killing a family member. Creates a cult of Bajorions dedicated to the Pai-Wraths,than abandons the cult when Major Kira knocks over the suicide pill jar that mixes it in with his fake. Than has sex with an old woman and becomes a demi-god. Bent on buring the universe despite the fact that his own people suffered heavily under the rule of the Dominion. After getting a final bitch slap from the Sisko who gets to have a happy ending living with his god alien parents. At the same time teaching them not to be huge dicks. While Dukat himself is trapped in the Fire Caves on Bajor.

His old friend Damar despite murdering a half breed woman is a lot more sane. Lacking Dukat's crimisa, things get worse for him and the Cardassians under Dominion rule. Most of their victories are off screen such as taking over Betazed. One of the none few major non founding planets of the Federation. This forces the Sisko to bring the Romulans into the war on the side of the Klingon-Federation alliance. With some underhanded methods from a former member of the Cassidian Obsidian Order(Elim Garak). I.e. blow up a Romulan Senator's shuttlecraft and tricking the pointy ears into thinking a damaged but fake datarod(an advanced form of Solid State Drive) was the real deal.

Thus the blame for his death will be switched from the Feds and pals are shifted to the Cardassians. By the final season this leads to the Dominion finding new best buds in the form of The Breen. Damar decides he has enough of the bullshit and in the ultimate irony realizes that the status of his people are now no different from the Cardassian occupied Bajor.

So after the Breen score the Domain a temporary victory over the Federation Alliance. Damar and his Cardi buds destroy a Dominion cloning facility while their backs are turned. Just so he can stick it to his "friend" the Vorta, Weyoun 8. Leaving them and the Klingons being the only thing stopping The Dominion from steamrolling over the Alpha Quadrant. As one Bird of Prey(doesn't say if its the frigate sized B'rel or Light Cruiser sized K'vort class. Though DS9 almost always used the former) was immune to the Breen energy dampening weapon due to modding its warp core. Gowron, due to being a moron who did nothing to change course after his most trusted advisor(Martok) turned out to be a Founder and the first time the Jem Hadar kicked their asses during the Klingon-Cardassian War. Decides to take glory for himself and discredit General Martok(who now how his pre Dominion internment job). This goes as badly as your thinking. Forcing Worf(now a legitimate badass compared to his TNG days) to kill him and turning the role of Chancellor to Martok.

Meanwhile the Feds decided to help out Damar's resistance by sending him Colonel Kira(who now has the rank of a Starfleet Commander), Odo and Garak(Ziyal's former simi-boyfriend). The resistance eventually get their hands on one of the Breen Energy Dampeners. During some infighting Damar realizes that the restoring the old Cardassia is pointless. Killing one of his old friends. The Breen and Jem'hadar do eventually one up the resistance. But not before their brutality turns more Cardassian against them. So during the final space battle this makes the Cardi military switch sides.
Damar is killed during the final raid on the Dominion HQ. Focing Kira and Garak to lead the final push into the compound.
The War between the Alpha Quadrant Alliance and The Dominion ends when Odo offers to share the cure to the disease created by Section 31(the Federation's answer to the Tal Shiar and Obsidian Order) which he passed onto them after the Founders also infected him with something that forced him to return to the Great Link the first time. He also promises to rejoin the Great Link so the Founders will learn not to be paranoid assholes.
It's difficult to say who are the bigger dicks here. The Founders for having Wayoon 4 infect Odo to return and turned him into into a solid(who was restored because dying a Changeling baby merged with him a season later) for killing a Founder who hacked the Defiant and almost succeeded at starting a war in the Alpha Quadrant. Or Section 31 for making the disease in the first place.

With all their advanced technology. One would think the Founders would have discovered a cure before being handed one. But the bad guys being just as flawed as everyone else is a common theme in Star Trek. Even in Star Trek Online despiste Odo being the one in charge a few decades later. As their Ambassador to the Federation. The experiments of the Founders sketchy past cause them and everyone else huge headaches including the dishonorable mention of the revived True Way movement.(i.e. the guys who hated that fact that the civilian Detapa Council ran Cadassaia.)

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'''Species 8472 / Undine'''
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The one and only race in the galaxy even the Borg don't want to fuck with. Introduced in Voyager, Species 8472 are three-legged creatures that live in a space called Fluid Space. It's similar to the [[Eye of Terror]] for the fact that it connects to an alternate dimension and [[Khorne|everyone will be ripped apart upon entering.]]

When the Borg first came around to try and assimilate them they were completely obliterated in a war in which 4 million Borg were killed in the first few days at the cost of almost no members of Species 8472. This war was such a roflstomp that the Borg were forced to call on the Federation for help. [[Tau|The Federation being the better people swallowed their pride and decided to help their sworn enemies,]] [[Eldrad|but were dicks and sent only one ship.]]

Species 8472 fought with fast moving, small ships and devastating beam weapons so the small ship of the Federation could keep up with them and helped the Borg force the species back into Fluid Space. The Federation were the villains on this one. That said, they eventually came to an accord with Species 8472, preventing further wars between the denizens of Fluid Space, except in lots and lots of video games that want to use a fresh antagonist.

That and that in ''Star Trek Online'', [[Awesome|they look like the fucking Predator.]]
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===The Q===

The Q are a race of beings who have elevated themselves to the point where they are basically gods. Most of them do not interact directly with the younger races, who they tend to consider with disdain- if they consider them at all. However a few of them take a more enlightened view, and one in particular has been known to fuck with individual humans from time time. They are mostly a TNG thing, and even there they work mostly by grace of John de Lancie's acting chops as a counterpoint to the charisma of Patrick Stewart, as de Lancie played the ''character'' Q, an all-powerful epic [[troll]] (no, not the fantasy kind) who's occasionally [[Tzeentch]]ian games sometimes appeared to be for his own amusement and sometimes acted as education or event protection to the human race. Various subplots involving the Q ''species'' range from somewhat thought provoking to mildly entertaining to ridiculous and banal, but the classic episodes that highlighted the charisma and chemistry of the two actors were often quite excellent.

=== The Mirror Universe ===
Not so much of a faction as an alternate setting, this is a parallel universe in which [[Alternate History|things have gone differently]] in Earth's History. The main point of divergence appears to occur when the Vulcan scientists who landed at Bozeman, Montana in 2063 are not welcomed with alcohol and music but instead are killed and have their ship looted. It is equally clear that where the main universe is Noblebright the Mirror Universe is Grimdark. Instead of a peace loving Federation searching for knowledge and friendly cooperation for the betterment of all, Earth gave rise to the ''Terran Empire'' which seeks out new life and civilizations to conquer and enslave, as it had done with the Klingons. Pretty much it's the PG-13 version of the Imperium of Man with a bit more Grimderp. Junior officers get promoted by killing their superiors, those that fail at that get thrown in the agony booth for their troubles and Emperor gets the job by usurping the previous incumbent. As a rule, characters in the mainline become, in the Mirror Universe, a selfish asshole version of themselves (or have to go along to get along: O'Brien, Spock). Following comic book logic the uniforms for the female characters are more revealing. Occasionally people can cross over from one universe to the next due to technobabble and cause mischief in either realm.

Originally it was a one off TOS setting for an episode of the week, but it was brought back in a few novels and some romps in Deep Space Nine in which [[Fail|the Terran Empire had fallen]]. In Enterprise's fourth season it got a two parter that was pretty good and would have been an annual thing if the show had been renewed, this one having little crossover with the main universe (a ship from TOS ended up in the Mirror Universe and is salvaged after all it's crew have died). We also went there in Discovery, for better or worse. Voyager never did the mirror universe, but instead got a homage episode with some alien historians in the far future getting the details wrong like historians tend to.

== The Star Trek Crew ==
Whether the focus of the show is exploration, manning a space station in an important locale or trying to get home, all Star Trek series have a basic set up of casting and focus: namely on a collection of people who are usually the senior most officers on the ship. If you decide to make a Star Trek inspired game take this into consideration.

* '''The Captain''': Big cheese. Makes the hard decisions. Needs to be able to talk, think or fight out of situations as needed. The third option fetishist finding the balance between empathy and reason. (Two least skubby examples: Kirk and Picard, but the skub will fly hard if you say one is better than the other, sufficed to say that people like both of them alot but for different reasons)
* '''The First Officer''': Second in command and trusted advisor. Added after the original series, where the role was combined with and split between two others. (Two least skubby examples: Riker and Kira)
* '''The Science Officer''': Got high Int stats. Can analyze the situation and work out solutions. The voice of reason. Almost never human. (Two least skubby examples: Data and Spock)
* '''The Engineer''': Hard working technically minded guy who gets shit done. (Two least skubby examples: Scotty and Geordi)
* '''The Doctor''': Ship's healer with a secondary scientific role. The voice of empathy, whether prickly or serene. (Two least skubby examples: Bones and the EMH Doctor)
* '''The Security Officer''': Rough and tumble no-nonsense sort whose job it is to keep these guys alive when diplomacy fails, which it often does. Often has to juggle providing ship's security with working the tactical station on the bridge in a crisis. (Two least skubby examples: Worf and Odo)
* '''The Helmsman''': Got mad spacecraft piloting skills, either full-sized starships, shuttles, or fighters. (Two least skubby examples: Sulu and Tom Paris)
* '''The Other Guy''': A crewmember whose role doesn't cleanly map onto other positions, a role often restricted to a single show. Example positions include communications officer, ship's councilor, transporter chief, and linguist. (Two Least skubby examples: Uhura and Troi)
* '''The Outsider''': Someone who is a passenger and regular cast member, but exists outside the organization, looking in and commenting. Usually works a side-job, like tailor, bartender, or cook. Either a beloved fan-favorite or utterly despised, there is no middle ground. (Two Least skubby examples: Guinan and Quark)

Some of these hats may be worn by more than one character, some may be worn by no one at all. This is especially true in the original series, which had a smaller cast overall, and which put less emphasis on an ensemble and more on the main trio of Kirk, Spock, and McCoy. The usual roles and character dynamics were instead set down by ''The Next Generation'', which later series generally copied.

== The Shows ==
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===''The Original Series''===
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Created in 1966 by legendary sci-fi [[spiritual liege]] and money-grubbing sexist lounge lizard Gene Roddenberry and pitched as a "Wagon Train to the stars", it's a pulpy adventure sci-fi, full of fistfights, sword fights, and hammy speeches. (The guns never work.)

The USS ''Enterprise'' is tasked by the Federation to go on a five year mission to explore space: the final frontier, to explore strange new worlds, to seek out new life and new civilizations and boldly go where no man has gone before, though due to budget constraints, her crew often finds that man has in fact gone there before. Or at least something that looks exactly like a man but is actually an [[Xenos|alien]]; most episodes split the difference. James T. Kirk sleeps with [[Hot Chicks|hot alien babes]] who either die tragically or leave tearfully at the end of the episode, but it's 'k because he's too in love with the Enterprise to ever love a mere ''woman'' more. Mr. Spock and Dr. McCoy are cold and logical and rash and emotional respectively, and their constant friction must be resulting in the best make-up sex in the world, Mr. Sulu and Lieutenant Uhura wait in vain for focus episodes that never come, Ensign Chekhov suffers horribly to the approval of American Cold War audiences, and Scotty [[gets shit done]]. Uniforms, while iconic, tend to look a bit civilian though. Miniskirts are apparently mandated attire for the ship's fan-servicey female "yeomen" and others, because 1966. The civilian nature of the attire (including, one must assume, the miniskirts, but they had a visual appeal all their own) were apparently an intentional design decision by Roddenberry who didn't want uniforms to look military. Further specialness on the part of Roddenberry demanded phasers not look like guns, instead looking like nothing in particular at all (although looking back at them today they look sort of like TV remotes, which would be invented much later), and also (probably the only sensible decision in this category) ships that didn't look like rockets, giving ships their distinctive and iconic saucer-engineering-nacelles look that still stands out today.

The Original Series frequently ran out of budget and entire episodes were filmed using spare costumes belonging to the production company, resulting in a series of extremely goofy excuses to go to planets full of gangsters or [[Nazi]]s. This is often copied by shows who don't realize it was done out of pure expediency, and nowadays this [[TVTropes|"Planet of Hats"]] gimmick is practically a box to check off when doing sci-fi adventure. The lack of budget also resulted in one of the more memorable inventions; unable to budget for a sequence showing the ''Enterprise'' or a shuttle landing on a new planet every week, the writers instead decided to invent the transporter to "beam" the crew down to planets or between starships. Also worth noting: despite its mediocre critical reception, ratings and eventual cancellation, not to forget the uneven quality of many episodes, especially in the Roddenberry-less third season where poor Fred Freiberger had to come onto a show he didn't understand and try to get better ratings with less money, ''TOS'' had a hell of a cultural impact thanks to syndication and it has been said that since it entered syndication in 1969, there hasn't been a 24-hour period without some TV station, in some country, playing Star Trek. Cancellation of The Original Series is now considered one of the worst decisions in TV history, and while much of its silly 60's campiness is now laughable, it often still manages to teach relevant and important lessons today.

Fun fact: the ''Enterprise'' and each of her 11 sister ships have enough firepower to [[Exterminatus]] a planet by themselves, after getting issued an order called General Order 24. This however is likely a time-consuming task. According to a later DS9 episode, it takes a fleet of 20 warships 1 hour of sustained bombardment to destroy a planets crust and 5 hours of sustained bombardment to destroy a planet down to its mantle. These 20 ships were also in service 100 years after the Enterprise so they were also more powerful.
Kirk has the distinction of being the only known captain to issue a [[Exterminatus|General Order 24]], because a planet was ''too'' much into wargames (he changed his mind after they dropped wargaming).
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===''The Animated Series''===
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The often forgotten middle child. More or less "seasons 4-5" of ''TOS'' with the same writing staff and actors, sans poor Walter Koenig. He was replaced by a weird camel person. He learned this at a convention, from a fan, while he was trying to announce he'd be writing an episode, which Gene promptly demanded he rewrite over and over. Classy.

Being animated allowed the staff to get a lot more creative with the alien designs and plots, and the writing and acting remain... well, top notch is a stretch, but certainly at the same levels as ''The Original Series'', with the occasional low point. Not ''nearly'' as bad as you're probably picturing from the name, although still limited by the low budget and primitive, cheap animation techniques of the television era it was aired in. Notably some sci-fi novelists were brought in to write some episodes, such as Larry Niven, and at least one episode, "Yesteryear," is considered such a pivotal moment in Spock's development that even people who hate the series enough to consider it all non-canon often make an exception just for that one.

Also, since the series now has no excuse for throwing in lots of Space Puritans and Space Wizards, it of course continued to do so to derptastic results, because by this point it had become traditional. The presence of a straight-up [[furry]] on the bridge, however, is downright unacceptable.
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===''The Next Generation''===
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Here's where it starts getting a little deeper and a little darker, although with a lot of left-wing political subtext turned up to 11. The USS ''Enterprise-D'' (the original and C were destroyed in action while A and B were retired) is, like its predecessor, tasked with going where no-one has gone before, but this time around the problems are less likely to be solved in a single episode. Jean-Luc Picard is the captain and he plots and negotiates his way to victory; Mr. Data is cold and unemotional, though not by choice - as an android, he'd very much like to change that; Riker takes over the captain's "sleep with alien babes" duties since Picard is married to the job; Worf the Klingon gets beaten up by monsters to show how tough the monsters are, meaning that Worf winds up looking incredibly weak by the end of the show's run and doesn't regain his badassery until his run on ''DS9''; Dr. Beverly Crusher is good old Bones minus his temper; Dr. Pulaski is Bones ''plus'' temper; Counsellor Troy is so badly written she becomes a running joke; and Geordi LaForge [[gets shit done]]. Only two things need to be said about helmsman Wesley Crusher: he was [[Mary Sue|Gene Wesley Roddenberry's shitty self-insert fanfic character]], and his sueness got to the point that even his actor started to hate him within the first season of the show.

Due to the massive success of The Original Series in syndication (and Paramount being [[Rage|pissed off]] by broadcast networks treating their most valuable IP like any other show), TNG was aired through syndication from the beginning. Although the first two seasons were laughably bad, the quality began to improve dramatically after an increasingly cocaine-addled Gene Roddenberry got too sick to keep ruining it and his partner-in-crime Maurice Hurley was thrown out on his ass, a moment often pinpointed via looking for when [[Meme|Riker grew a beard.]] The later seasons are widely considered to represent the apex of the franchise's episodic formula on the small screen (although ''DS9'' gave it a run for its money with a more serialized approach); sadly, this series only got one good movie.
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===''Deep Space Nine''===
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Unlike all the other series so far, ''Deep Space Nine'' primarily takes place in a fixed location - the titular space station Deep Space Nine, out near the borders of Federation Space. Said space station is near Bajor, which was recently freed from Cardassian occupation, and a wormhole to the other side of the galaxy which allows [[Warp|all sorts of of crazy shit to go down]]. If the other shows are a wagon train, this one's the border fort.

Benjamin Sisko is the captain, declared Emissary by the nearby Bajorans for making contact with the wormhole aliens they worship, and he successfully hybridizes the blow-the-shit-out-of-whatever-you-can't-punch Kirk approach with the talk-in-a-very-dignified-way-about-the-philosophy-of-the-thing-and-win-by-rhetoric Picard maneuver, in his ultimately-successful quest to become the baddest motherfucker in space, then literally becomes a space god. Kira the Bajoran ex-<s>terrorist</s> <S>''noble freedom fighter''</s> (who are we kidding she calls herself a terrorist) struggles to free and rebuild her people while coming to terms with the moral ambiguities of situations she prefers to see in black-and-white, Dr. Bashir works to find his character for several seasons before becoming a highlight, Dax gets often written poorly and has to switch bodies doing it, Odo IS ''Liquid Space Cop'', Quark runs his bar and [[troll|heckles]] the Federation, Garak pretends to be a tailor while definitely not being a super-spy and dropping killer lines, and Miles O'Brien [[gets shit done]]. Also, Worf wanders in halfway through, and actually gets to punch things instead of just getting punched by them. It's also a lot more political than other series (though ''TNG'' and ''Voyager'' have their moments) and the last series to have Gene Roddenberry's involvement (with less enthusiasm, in fact often much to the benefit of this particular series thematically, although Roddenberry's complete departure did not necessarily bode well for the franchise in general.)

It's the closest the pre-Kelvin series ever get to [[grimdark]]. Especially when the Dominion show up. With minimal grimderp that plague the later seasons and Kelvin era movies. The show has aged remarkably well and the terrorist/freedom fighter debate was repeatedly explored in a very mature and honest way. ''DS9'' is the most serialized of all Trek shows and could be considered a forerunner to the golden age of television with its long story arcs and deep character development. Overall, ''DS9'' has to be considered the most consistently good Trek show thanks to the excellent writing and fantastic performances from a truly wonderful ensemble cast. At least until the final season, when the writers who made it good were pulled to try and fail to make good movies, heralding the failure that started with ''Voyager'' and continued until the reboot movies. The finale episodes were mostly okay and tied up the story semi-satisfyingly, Though a few die-hard subplots fell flat.

It wasn't without its controversies however. The show was airing around the same time as another thematically similar sci-fi show, ''Babylon 5''. Not only that but characters also shared similarities, as did the episodes. Interestingly, beginning of both series, introduction of characters and airing of similar episodes were often too close to each other for one show to copy the other but this did not stop massive [[Rage]] and [[/v/|fanboy wars]] from starting between fans of the two series accusing one another of plagiarism and having an inferior product. Happily, as time went on and both shows evolved, these hurt feelings have mostly faded.

How good is ''Deep Space Nine''? Every Star Trek series and even the reboot movies have pretty much ripped off ideas and concepts established during the series. Famously, within the "Trekker/Trekie" fan community, there's a little cell of fans who like it better than most other ''Star Trek''; these fans are typically called "Niners."
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===''Voyager''===
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Star Trek: Voyager centers around the eponymous USS ''Voyager'', a smallish ship which gets teleported over to the other side of the galaxy. The plot of the series centers on the crew's efforts to get back home, which COULD have made for an excellent premise. Unfortunately, there were few lasting story arcs, with most episodes being fully self-contained (as well as being littered with far too many episodes featuring holodeck or transporter incidents). As a consequence, despite being completely isolated from the Federation, no matter how bad things got Voyager always appeared in the next episode without a scratch, fully supplied, and with all its shuttlecraft intact. Think ''Gilligan's Island'' on a starship.

Like ''TNG'' and ''DS9'' it's a character-driven drama just as often as it is a sci-fi adventure romp, although compared to TNG only a few of the characters are particularly memorable. The captain and arguable "main character" is Kathryn Janeway, a Katharine Hepburn lookalike (I see what you did there) who is stern without being cold, and principled without being inflexible. The fan favorite is a character called "The Doctor" ([[Doctor Who|No relation]]); he's the solid-light hologram representative of the ship's emergency medical computer, who has to take on actual medical duties when their chief medical officer was conveniently killed in the pilot episode. Other than this, Chakotay is a peace-loving and spiritually rich indian <s>freedom fighter</s> <s>terrorist</s> [[FAIL|who was written with the help of a special cherokee consultant so native his name was Jamake Highwater and it turned out later on that he was actually jewish and didn't know dick about native cultures so he made everything up resulting in Chakotay basically being a borderline racist caricature of what you think indians are like. Akoochimoya.]] Tom Paris is an annoying jerk and is counterbalanced by Harry Kim who is the ideal boy-scout, making him only half as annoying and twice as boring. B'elanna Torres tries to perpetuate a lineage of dudes getting shit done but ends up blankly reciting her technobabble, having second degree plasma burns and – worst of all – systematically fails to get shit done whenever the warp core goes nuts. Tuvok tries hard to be as cool as Spock but ends up being a lame version of the n°1 Vulcan who uses logic to justify everything and makes it short for "you are wrong, I am right because I said so." Kes is passed as a fragile and nice character but it takes a couple of episodes to realize that having a short lifespan does not change the facts: [[powergamer|when you can boil someone to death from the inside of their body, drain life from everything around you to become stronger and do anything you want without knowing how, just by thinking of it]], you are a goddamn Mary Sue. From the fourth season onwards the only character the writers seemed to care about was Seven of Nine, [[Mary Sue|a human woman who recently escaped from Borg control and kept all of her cyborg enhancements but regained her free will]]; another Mary Sue, to be sure, but she's [[Hot Chicks|hot]], and the other characters are much worse, so that's not really a bad thing. Fortunately, The Doctor still received a lot of attention from the writers and almost single-handedly made the show watchable. There was also Neelix, who was the apparent inspiration for Jar-Jar Binks, and any sane crew would have pushed him out of an airlock on the first episode. Fans who stuck with the show despite its glaring failings were given one final slap in the face with the <s>controversial</s> shit final season, in which the producers decided "screw steadily crafting a satisfying conclusion to a story which we have wasted for most of the last seven years anyway; lets just ignore it until the final episode and then throw in some shit about trans-warp conduits and time travel, bitches love time travel!" If you did not care about any of the characters or the subplots or time travel making sense (the writers sure didn't), then the final episode was made just for you (and the Borg got a major setback, too, just don't think about the setup too hard).

The Doctor never once stopped being totally fucking awesome though (enough so to even earn a cameo in First Contact), and the great acting from the cast carries the series from being horrific to ''occasionally'' watchable. Just goes to show that no matter how good your actors are, they can't make diamonds out of shit.

Overall, most Star Trek fans view Voyager's legacy with a shrug and a "meh." Unfortunately, hopes that Voyager's successor would revitalize the franchise would soon prove to be overly optimistic.

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===''Enterprise''===
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From the minute the Nickelback-tier theme tune started, Enterprise attempted to take Star Trek in a new direction and was only partially successful in doing so. The series never quite caught its footing, although it still managed to have some enjoyable moments. It was most notable for providing a first-hand view of the key events that directly led to the formation of the Federation. The Federation's founding races were also featured heavily, with Andorians, Tellarites, and Vulcans all enjoying significant screen time alongside the human characters.

It's a prequel to the rest of the canon, taking place on the first ''Enterprise'', before the Federation was founded and during the period when Earth was still an independent power- so there's a lot of primitive versions of things from other series. At least the uniforms were pretty cool in an Air Force sort of way. Captained by <s>that guy from ''Quantum Leap''</s> Jonathan Archer, in hindsight the fact that they had to rename him from their original choice of Jeffrey Archer to avoid confusion with the disgraced British MP and author of the same name probably cursed the series with bad karma before it had even begun shooting. In an unusual twist for a ''Trek'' series, his first officer isn't a <s>terrorist</s> ''noble freedom fighter,'' however she does share a trait with her ''Voyager'' predecessor in that the actress who portrayed her frequently criticized the show's writers in interviews. Other than that, well, Hoshi Sato screams a lot, Travis Mayweather was so dull that even the writers forgot he existed, the resident Vulcan T'Pol serves as both the Science Officer and source of sexy fanservice, Malcolm Reed has an accent, Dr Phlox is a weird creepy alien with weird creepy alien morals (and gets surprisingly interesting when given enough screentime, which hardly ever happened), and Trip also has an accent and [[gets shit done]].

Was retooled twice, the third season tries to be ''24'' IN SPACE (stop some aliens, the Xindi, from blowing up Earth) while the 4th season is a massive apology about the last three seasons that tries to fix all the problems they had. As a result, the last season is the only one that's close to being really good.

Unfortunately, the poorly-received final episode is set on the holodeck of the Enterprise-D, which leaves us with the firm impression that the producers would have much rather have just continued making ''The Next Generation''. Considering the mediocre quality of the ''TNG'' movies we got instead, this probably would have worked out better for all involved (Or not since ''Voyager'' was that; its first episode was even numbered 901, as in Season 9 Episode 1).

Yet despite all the bad directing, subpar plots, and frankly boring episodes, ''Enterprise'' sometimes still manages to be moderately enjoyable with occasional moments of awesomeness if you can suffer through a fair few awful spots and aggressive mediocrity almost everywhere else. The focus on founding Federation races like the Andorans was refreshing and the technology level, being somewhere between the original series and the real world present-day, was quite interesting. We also got to see the Vulcans portrayed as arrogant, superior dicks. This actually makes a lot more sense than the way they're usually portrayed (which is fairly submissive towards humans) because they are, obviously and objectively, the superior race. The Klingons certainly still considered themselves to be honorable but the show made it clear that the Klingon notion of honor is rarely analogous to the human concept which was interesting as all hell to watch. There have been a few small nods to Enterprise in Discovery and the Abrams movies.

And let's be fucking honest, [[/tg/]] loves 40k and the Xindi arc was about as grimdark as shit gets. And that was awesome.

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===''Discovery''===
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----
<s>A LOAD OF SOCIAL JUSTICE SHIT!</s> Ahem, let's start again, shall we?

A new "prequel" series set 10 years before ''The Original Series.'' Again. Run exclusively on CBS' paid streaming service (unless you live outside the US and Canada, in which case you can get it on Netflix) to try and drum up sign-ups and revenue, it features a mix of ''Enterprise'' and Abramstrek aesthetics despite supposedly taking place in parallel to the TOS "The Cage" pilot while [[what|having technology superior to late DS9]] and introducing [[dune|mushroom-based space travel]] that would imply [[retcon|all later events and warp travel would be outdated]]. The trailer has attracted a lot of concern over the fact that Klingons have been completely redesigned to look like slit-nosed ogres wearing ancient Egyptian cosplay, and rumors that the Klingons shown were [[Racial Holy War|primitives who had been trapped in stasis]] proved to be unfounded, so there is no excuse. Not having a cold war to posture about, the new villains are based off of Trump-inspired xenophobia by the admission of the authors. Also the lead character is Spock's human sister that he never mentioned before, aka the ''exact'' origin of the [[Mary Sue]] which is just fucking depressing. To further reinforce this, there are ''numerous'' examples of dialogue and exposition that serve only to show how the Mary Sue main character was right all along, usually in conjunction with the death of the character that had foolishly disagreed with her. Want a new Star Trek episode about racism and immigration? Try the now-banned [https://youtu.be/3VEZH8bqytA Star Trek Continues]. Want Star Trek with humor, keep an eye out for the upcoming [https://ew-com.cdn.ampproject.org/c/s/ew.com/tv/2018/10/25/star-trek-animated-comedy/amp/?fbclid=IwAR2WN6auDNm5YiunYhaqiu7vt9f-P08AuUjMpLA5LlpUgvTm9_xloJNRYb0 Star Trek: Lower Decks]; the prognosis doesn't look good so far, but let's wait for the release for the final recommendation. want a pseudo-Star Trek show about other modern issues? Try ''The Orville'' below; that's right, American Dad In Space may right now be a better Star Trek than an actual Star Trek series.

Initial reviews have been... well, it's shit. The writing is overly convoluted, the massive injection of grimdark into pre-TOS continuity is anathema to the hardcore fans (the ''human'' characters are often the ones doing the nastiest shit, including [[Marines Malevolent|trying to kill a Klingon party by planting an explosive on the corpse of one of their comrades for when they came to collect the dead]]) and the Klingons are so flat and devoid of characterization that they might as well be Larry the Cable Guy lookalikes wearing Trump hats. This is a massive disappointment for a series that promised to put a spotlight on Klingon culture but ended up retconning all the characterization that happened in TNG and DS9. It ''may'' get better with time (remember that it took two seasons for TNG to get really good) but given the release schedule (split between 2017 and 2018 with a long break) it may come too late for the fanbase to care. Currently it's cause for more fans to lose their shit over whether it's better or worse than the Abrams movies, which is a new record of [[Skub|Trek Skub]]. Releasing the show on CBS All Access instead of cable or broadcast TV makes it seem that executives don't really give a shit if the show succeeds or fails, bringing up the question of [[Bioware|whether they're deliberately putting Star Trek: Discovery in a no-win scenario where, no matter what happens, the executives have an excuse to cancel Star Trek altogether]].

Another stupid decision was not shelling out the cash to bring back Bruce Greenwood and Zachary Quinto as Captain Pike and Spock, respectively. Their ages wouldn't have mattered either if CBS and Paramount weren't too cheap to use the anti-aging CGI tech that is so commonplace these days. That being said, Anson Mount's portrayal of Captain Pike was a revelation that was BY FAR the most well-received aspect of Season 2.

There were also allegations that large chunks of the plot were stolen from previews of an in-development indie game (the unreleased 2014 game featured giant Tardigrades that had the ability to use an interstellar network to travel anywhere they wanted to- sound familiar?).

While Season 2 had some watchable moments, it was still middling at best, and nobody is ''ever'' going to let this series live down the garbage fire that was Season 1. If you do decide to watch Season 2, try not to think about it too hard once you are done. It gets worse and worse the more you think about it as you can and will come to realize that {{spoiler|the overarching plot hinges on time-travel but because the writing and production staff kept being shuffled, no one kept continuity so some of the hints of future actions or "red lights" are just forgotten about, some time-travel is done just to set up another event to make it possible for that same time-travel to happen. Think Bill and Ted, except lame and very confusing. Season 2 is an okay show if you look at the state-of-the-art visuals, let the big emotional moments grip you, but if you stop for a second and think about the continuity of events, you push yourself on a slippery slope that ends in not being able to ever trust the showrunning staff again.}}
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===''Picard''===
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Set to be a continuation of the original timeline, featuring old man Picard with Patrick Stewart reprising the role. Hopes are not high, but at the very least Patrick Stewart's presence should make it watchable if nothing else.

Update: It's bad. So, so bad.

The story so far: Picard ragequit Starfleet after they sat back and let the Romulans get blown up by the supernova mentioned in the first Abrams movie. This happened because some rogue androids orbitally bombarded Mars and blew up the rescue fleet that was being built there, so the Federation has banned all R&D on synthetic lifeforms and subsequently become [[Imperium of Man|isolationist, racist and xenophobic]] (does this remind you of anything?). Picard has been living in his family chateau ever since, making wine and hanging out with his dog and his Romulan housekeepers. Then a scared girl named Dahj turns up on his doorstep, and it turns out she's a highly advanced biological android constructed from the surviving bits of Data's positronic brain by the guy who wanted to dismantle Data in that episode "The Measure of a Man." Before Picard can really figure out what to do about her, she gets killed by a secret society of Luddite anti-Android Romulan assholes, but it turns it that's okay because she has a twin "sister" named Soji who is working with some other Romulans on a derelict Borg cube. Picard decides it's time to saddle up and go be a hero again. He starts putting together a crew that includes Agnes Jurati, a former cyberneticist; Raffi Musiker, his last executive officer, [[What|who is now an alcoholic drug-vaping hermit]] after getting kicked out of Starfleet; Cristobal Rios, a scruffy merc pilot whose ship is staffed entirely by holograms of himself; Elnor, a Romulan warrior monk raised by Romulan warrior nuns; and Seven of Nine, who has become a kickass pilot and is no longer wearing her infamous catsuit. Together, they're out to save Soji, stop the Romulans, and be the good guys in a galaxy that needs heroes, etc etc.

Key storytelling criticisms of the show include the idea that the Romulan Empire should have had enough infrastructure to effect an evacuation without help, and that even if they didn't, the Federation would ''never'' abandon a neighbor who was asking for help- not even a former enemy, and not even when doing so became difficult or inconvenient. Another issue comes up when the show reveals that the Borg have assimilated transgalactic teleporters from a throwaway alien race that appeared in an early episode of ''Voyager'', but only for the Borg queen to use in case the cube she's on is about to be blown up, which begs the question of ''why in the hell aren't they using them to overwhelm the Federation's defenses with drone spam and assimilate everything?''

To make matters even more dumb and yet also more complicated at the same time, the showrunners are apparently under some kind of licensing agreement regarding the portrayal of images and concepts from the earlier shows. This means that they can't, for example, casually mention the Dominion War and its impact on the Federation, because if they did, they'd have to pay a licensing fee. This is why the show has been carefully crafted to look like a distant, derpy cousin of Star Trek, while only occasionally featuring cameos of things such as the Enterprise-D, or directly referencing arcs in previous shows: because if they use concepts from prior Star Trek shows, they have to pay for them.

Finally, when all has been said and done by the end of Season 1, Picard himself is reduced to a nearly-useless side character in his own show. Where once he commanded the admiration and respect of friends and foes alike, in this show he is consistently portrayed as a disrespected, disregarded, and often powerless caricature of himself, utterly reliant on the characters around him. {{spoiler|It doesn't help they legit kill him in the last episode and then made him an android after he also agreed to "kill" Data whose memories are basically in a server on a planet of Soong androids. The showrunners specifically came out and said their plan was always to kill Picard to make a point about how privileged he was being a captain in Starfleet. You can't make this shit up.}}

One other thing is certain. Whether you like the series or not, it's clear that this series is not taking place in Gene Roddenberry's noblebright vision of the Federation, and the fact that it is yet another grim, violent entry into the franchise is a point that has left many viewers with a bad aftertaste. If the rumors are true, then this show may have either killed the current grimderp Trek or has left fans so pissed that CBS is, once again, on the verge of financial ruin and possibly looking to sell the franchise since they aren't making the money they thought they would after the massive amounts of money they dumped into both this and Discovery.

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===''Strange New Worlds''===
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An attempt to put the golden goose back together on the operating table. After seeing the reception of having Captain Pike in Discovery, Paramount decided to simply return to the pilot cast of The Original Series with its fingers crossed that the old bird will resume replicating gold eggs.

NOTE: It may or may not actually come to light as rumors are leaking out that CBS has been pitching this, a Section 31 show and several other show ideas to try and get funding after failing to actually make money from their streaming service and dumping millions into Discovery and Picard with little return in way of merchandising money. It seems CBS and Paramount suits are desperate for their own version of the Marvel Cinematic Universe. (What Warner Bros. failed to do with their DC movies) While having little to no understanding of what makes both it and Star Trek popular in the first place.

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===''Lower Decks''===
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A new animated series being written by Mike McMahan, the guy who does the Rick & Morty cartoon. It's set in 2380 and will apparently focus less on the bridge crew in general and more on the grunts working in the bowels of the ship, specifically four ensigns including an Orion named Tendi which leads one to believe the show will probably be focused mostly on lowbrow "humor" episodes with technobabble nonsense stapled to it just like McMahan's other works. Expect people to be spouting off inane bullshit and saying "you're just not intelligent enough to understand" if you call out their dumb bullshit, followed by intense nerd rage.

After the August 2020 premiere, the general consensus seems to be that this supposed comedy series not only manages to be rather unfunny, but like the other Kurtzman productions that have preceded it, it also misses the whole point of Star Trek in the first place. Despite these problems there are a minority of people who seem to be enjoying the series.

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== Homages ==
Being such a long-running franchise with a wide audience, Star Trek has gained enough pop-culture recognition that it is often referenced in other works. In a few cases entire projects are made to pay homage Star Trek. Here are some examples.

=== Galaxy Quest ===
A sci-fi/comedy film released in 1999, directed by Dean Parisot. It parodies science fiction films and series in general, but particularly ''Star Trek'' and its fandom. The film stars big name actors including Tim Allen, Sigourney Weaver and the late Alan Rickman. The plot revolves around the cast of a defunct cult television series called Galaxy Quest (for example, Tim Allen played the Kirk/Shatner expy and Alan Rickman played the Spock/Nimoy expy). They're also suffering fatigue that mirrors the experiences of the actual Star Trek actors (Rickman's character is typecast with his Galaxy Quest character and laments it, similar to how these things happened to the late, great Leonard Nimoy).

The cast are suddenly visited by actual aliens, the Thermians, who believe the series to be an accurate documentary (they have no concept of fiction and only the most bare bones idea of lying) and seek their help. The Thermians take the actors with them, who find themselves involved in a very real, and dangerous, intergalactic conflict, and unlike the show where it all wrapped up quickly they struggle to learn about and relate to the aliens. Speaking of the aliens, in a witty nod to the "rubber forehead aliens" so common in Star Trek, the Thermians first appear to resemble humans with unnaturally pale skin and straight hair, but that's revealed to be a holographic disguise and their true forms are squid-like. Can these actors find greatness within themselves, and possibly personal redemption? (Spoiler: yes, and it is incredible.)

Built around that ''Three Amigos'' premise of "What if the cast of ''Star Trek'' ended up on a real spaceship and had to actually do the shit they did in the show?" Featuring a veritable all-star cast of talented comedians and character actors, this is one of the best parodies ever made, and an affectionate love-letter to the franchise as a whole.

===Star Wreck: In the Pirkinning===
Another parody, parodying not only ''Star Trek'' but ''Babylon 5'' as well. The seventh in a series fan movies released in 2005, it's about Captain Pirk builds a starship called CPP ''Kickstart'', allies with Russia and takes over the world. He wants to take over more planets but the ships of his P-Fleet aren't fast enough to travel outside the Solar system. A maggot hole opens and it leads to an alternate reality. Pirk wants to take over the Earth of this reality, which leads to an [[awesome]] space battle between the P-Fleet and the fleet of the space station Babel 13 led by Johnny Sherrypie. The movie features some of the best special effects ever put in a sci-fi movie, which is pretty impressive, considering that this is an amateur film with a very low budget and was rendered in five years in someone's bedroom. The film is spoken in Finnish but subtitles are available for a wide variety of languages, including Klingon. They also made [https://web.archive.org/web/20070828010927/http://rpg.starwreck.com/ a role-playing game based on it], where your character [[Truenamer|becomes more incompetent]] [[Page 42|as he levels up]].

===Star Trek: Renegades===
Kickstarter Trek. The makers submitted their made-for-TV movie pilot to CBS in an attempt to get it made into a legit on-the-air series (and by god it shows), but they were not successful. As a result, while the project limped along for a few years afterward, it has good and bad in equal measure. As a non-official product it also cannot be considered canon. Some characters are actually interesting (about time we saw more of the Breen!) while others are pure Mary Sues (including a male Seven of Nine with a built-in Borg-gun/personal shield/fully-functional hand). Some of the ideas are interesting while others are boring or already-been-done. The CGI is all Hollywood-quality, but the practical effects are okay at best.
It's obvious that they made this without knowing that they were going to be able to make a TV show or not, and tried to cram the sort of build-up and intrigue we saw in DS9 into a span of 90 minutes. For now though, it's decidedly meh, and probably a dead project as well since it hasn't been mentioned on the maker's website in over a year as of late 2019.

===Star Trek Continues===
Of all the offerings listed here, Star Trek Continues is BY FAR the closest in theme and tone to the original 1960's series. Indeed, this is the whole point: from its inception, this fan-funded project was intended to represent a what-if "4th Season" of the Original Series, ending with the conclusion of the Enterprise's 5-year mission. It is surprisingly and at times ''delightfully'' watchable, with strong stories, consequences and arcs that carry over to later episodes, tons of attention to detail, unexpected cameos, and a cast that really came together, particularly in later episodes. It also delicately navigated a line between viewing female characters through the lens of a show that was rooted in 1960's culture while also not treating them as weak children dependent on men for protection. Star Trek Continues successfully concluded its "season" with all 11 episodes gradually released from 2014 to 2018, to heaps of industry awards and wide praise (including a personal endorsement from Gene Roddenberry's son, who said his father would've approved).

=== The Orville ===
<s>Star Trek fanfiction with the serial numbers filed off</s> A comedy drama sci-fi television series that began as a homage to Star Trek, created by and starring Seth MacFarlane of ''Family Guy'' infamy-- [[Skub|No wait, come back!]] The guy's a huge Trekkie and felt too many shows were up in their ass with grimdark, so he pitched his idea to the execs to make a loving comedic sendup of The Next Generation. Many of the executive producers and developers are notable industry Trekkies such as David Goodman (who wrote the ''Futurama'' Trek parody episode), or Trek alumni such as Brannon Braga. First airing in 2017, the series is about the strung-out not-Picard protagonist Captain Edward Mercer, played by MacFarlane himself, of the eponymous not-Enterprise spaceship "The Orville" ([https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wright_brothers#Orville likely named after one of the Wright Brothers]). His ex-wife Kelly is the first officer while the crew includes the beefy gay not-Worf alien Bortus, asshole not-Lore android Isaac, and John LaMarr and Gordon Malloy - an even more ridiculous parody of Harry Kim and Tom Paris. They explore the galaxy while dealing with personal problems and fighting various bad guys.

The show has a mix of drama, comedy and commentary on real world issues and the first Season ran for twelve episodes. The episodes include the pilot episode "Pilot" - where Ed and Kelly begin their posting on the Orville and start trying to reconcile enough to work together, "Majority Rule" - an episode with good (if derivative) commentary on social currency systems, "About a Girl" - A Bortus-centered episode that explores his relationships during a vital part of his race's life cycle, and "Krill" - one of the season's three anti-religion episodes (seriously, Season 1 pushes atheism hard enough to make Star Trek look like The Chronicles of Narnia), this one named for the villainous alien race who follow a violently xenophobic religion and the Orville's crew are tasked with studying them. The season was mostly well-received, a few recurring complaints notwithstanding, and the show was greenlit for a second season.

In the second season, Alara was written out of the show halfway through. The character's actress, Halston Sage, was briefly rumored to be dating Seth MacFarlane, although it is just as likely that other factors such as her role on ''Prodigal Son'' or a desire for a pay increase may also have played into her departure. If the dating rumor is true, however, it just goes to show that [[Derp|dating a co-worker and subordinate 20 years younger than you almost never ends well]], which may come back to haunt the showrunners as she was one of the better received characters. Don't worry though, Alara's character was immediately replaced with another forehead-alien of the very same race, gender, and profession, despite the fact that it had already been established that Alara's career path as a security officer was considered rather unusual for her species. Throughout the Season Isaac gradually turned good, becoming the crew's not-Data member, and another episode relied on a plot hole where a Krill captured and imprisoned by Mercer and co. in Season 1 returned as part of a strike force targeting Ed with no explanation for her escape. Speaking of the Krill, they become the "lesser villains that need to team up with the good guys to fight worse villains" cliché, in a possible asspull given all the villainous setup they got (deliberately built around being violently religious and xenophobic with a sinister design invoking Nosferatu to the point of sharing his fatal weakness to sunlight). The team up happens because the rest of Issac's robotic race, the Kaylons, have gone [[Necrons|Full Skynet]] against organic life. The cast seems to be gelling better - rumored situation between Seth and Halston aside, the writers have a better idea of what the show should be and the humor is now used in service of the stories; Alara's loss aside, it's a step up overall. While the show is getting a third season, it was moved from TV to streaming service Hulu and filming is currently delayed by the global COVID-19 pandemic.

Some commend The Orville as a well-made, witty breath of [[Noblebright|fresh air]] in an overly [[Grimdark|stagnant]] genre with a side of nostalgia. Others denounce The Orville as derivative, sophomoric, vain (some consider MacFarlane stunt-casting himself as the main character the height of vanity, especially given his tendency to push his views on the audience) and also uncomfortable (eg; Ed's interactions with ex-wife character Kelly). Some think both sides have a point. Trekkies are equally divided on the show; many Trekkies [[butthurt]] over Discovery endorse The Orville, a significant number of Discovery fans hate The Orville, and a small and overlooked group quietly enjoys both.

As always, stay tuned for how this turns out.

== Films ==
As a general rule, the even-numbered ones aren't complete shit.

* '''''Star Trek: The Motion Picture''''': AKA: The Slow Motion Picture, or the Motionless Picture. A giant space whatsit is flying towards Earth, the mostly-retired crew has to go figure out what's going on and stop it. Old school sci-fi geeks like the ideas, but terrible pace and interminable special effects that were clearly meant to capitalize on ''2001: A Space Odyssey'' while failing to understand what people like about that movie kill them dead for everyone else. Besides the uniform worn by Kirk, the uniforms also look like pajamas. So no wonder they were changed only a movie later. Features an entirely bald female alien who is [[What|so good at sex that she has to swear an oath not to get it on with the crew]]. Really. This is canon.
* '''''Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan''''': As Kirk starts to feel his age, a one-off villain from the show makes a dramatic reapperance: [[Meme|KKKHHHAAAAAAAAAAAANNNN!!!!]] Widely considered the best of all the films, and the only one considered a straight up great film, no qualifiers. If you haven't seen it, see it. So good many later movies in the franchise just try to rip it off instead of finding their own identities. Interesting fact: due to time constraints, actors of Kirk and Khan weren't available at the same time. So the entire script was written so that Kirk and Khan never need to meet face-to-face. But you'd never notice if it weren't pointed out to you. Roddenberry screeched autistically and objected to some of the actions of his characters, including Kirk shooting a [[Enslavers|brain eating space parasite]] rather than "[[Noblebright|keeping it for study]]." The fact that his strongest objections came to the most [[win]] of the films says a great deal about his deprecating value to the franchise around the TNG era.
* '''''Star Trek III: The Search for Spock''''': Where is Spock? ''He's on Genesis.'' ALL AHEAD FULL! Not really bad, just mediocre and run of the mill compared to the superior films that surround it. It was also saddled with the misfortune of undoing some of the previous film's more-daring decisions, and having its only daring decision reversed a film later. If you had to say that any film broke the "odd numbers suck" rule, it would be this one.
* '''''Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home''''': The crew of the ''Enterprise'' travels back in time to save the whales. No, literally and unironically. Scott tries to talk to a computer through the mouse, Spock nerve-pinches a punk on a bus in San Francisco, and somehow it works, creating something perhaps not quite in the genre intended but a classic in sci-fi dramedy. ''The Voyage Home'' is a zany comedy romp beloved by the general public and fandom alike, leaving only the most intractable fanbois to bitch and moan. Nimoy directed this one but there was a contract stipulation that Shatner would get whatever Nimoy got, thus leading to...
* '''''Star Trek V: The Final Frontier''''': aka. the film that should never have been made, even by many die-hard Trekkies. Kirk's actor got his spin behind the camera as agreed and wanted a "thought-provoking movie" after the more comical IV. Good intention, but the abysmal execution leaves the audience facepalming at the very best. Between the weak script, the 'moral' of the story ('faith can be abused by unscrupulous people', for the record) delivered with all the subtlety of a punch to the face, poor special effects, uninspired performances by the actors (who for the most part didn't like the script as it had them behave against everything that had come before and betray Kirk) and Kirk's screentime-hogging (despite being behind the camera); this movie is by far the absolute worst of the entire lot and simply. Not. Worth. Watching! [[BLAM|Mention it on 4chan at your own peril!]]
* '''''Star Trek VI: The Undiscovered Country''''': The Space Cold War ends amidst searing mystery and drama. The sendoff for the original cast, except Kirk who got a worse send-off a movie later. Gene Roddenberry watched it, hated it, and was going to seek legal advice but died a week later. And good riddance to that, because it's a pretty sweet political thriller if your hippie-panties don't get into a twist at the thought that the Federation isn't a perfect place full of perfect people.
* '''''Star Trek Generations''''': Malcolm McDowell blows up planets to get into a magic space ribbon to live forever, no it does not make any more sense in context. An already-weak story hamstrung by its obsession with being daring and unconventional rather than good. Also, Kirk dies on the bridge in the most face-palming manner possible. Nimoy was offered the Director's chair, took one look at the script and demanded a rewrite which didn't happen so he refused to be involved.
* '''''Star Trek First Contact''''': The ''TNG'' crew face off with the Borg to ensure the future happens. Lots of action, a script that sparks with energy and snark, and some quite effective performances make this the only good ''TNG'' movie (we don't blame you TNG cast). It sadly is also the only appearance of the Defiant on screen, doing a pretty decent job of fighting the Borg before the Enterprise E saves the day of course. The Borg Queen was also introduced here before Voyager, ruining what could have been a good idea.
* '''''Star Trek Insurrection''''': If you thought the [[Avatar|Na'vi]] were a bunch of badly-written [[Mary Sue]]s, you ain't seen nothing yet! B-b-b-baby you ain't seen n-n-n-nothing yet! Also, Riker shaves his beard, and that's basically a war crime. Aged from terrible to forgettably bad thanks to that one scene of Picard and Data singing ''HMS Pinafore'' going memetic.
* '''''Star Trek Nemesis''''': The last stand of the ''TNG'' cast, ending not with a bang but a whimper. It also required amending the even=good/odd=bad rule to "''Galaxy Quest'' counts as a ''Star Trek'' film so this one is also odd."
* '''''Star Trek''''' (2009): Alternate timeline "reboot" (sideboot?) with the original crew, albeit with new younger actors. Timey-wimey shit happens and old prime timeline Spock (reprised by old Leonard Nemoy) is hurled back in time along with a bunch of Romulan assholes. The dickbag Romulans begin fucking shit up, slightly altering history in a way that ensures gratuitous lens flare. [[skub| Skubtastic]], but at least fun to watch (if a literally gleaming, uncomplicated space action-adventure that doesn't delve deeply into the human condition ala II or deeply into idiocy ala V/Generations/Insurrection spells "fun" to you), which is more than ''most'' odd-numbered films can muster. If you still even count it as odd, without the ''Galaxy Quest''-amendment.
* '''''Star Trek Into Darkness''''': Some [[edgy]] [[Fail|shit]]. The second of the alternate timeline ''Trek'' films. Terrorism, conspiracy and flapdoodle. Even more skubtastic, but generally considered worse than its predecessor, partially because (like ''Nemesis'') it tries to be a remake of ''The Wrath of Khan'' and having Kirk at his most punchable.
* '''''Star Trek Beyond''''': Controversial, but more in a question of whether it's decent or quite good. Lots of good character stuff and a decent story revolving around a race of mysterious space pirates trying to conquer a colony, but the action photography is poorly-lit shaky-cam horseshit and the sound work is awful. If it's the last "Kelvin Timeline" movie, as it seems it will be, at least it ended on a good note.

== Novels ==
Like most long time franchises ''Star Trek'' has a massive line of books. Unlike most they're basically just fanfics as nothing but the show and the movies is canon so the writers can do whatever they want. This changed after ''Nemesis'' since they might never have another show or movie in the "Prime" universe, so the writers got their shit together and wrote a group of books as a tight community very close to the shows. The relaunch novels are a continuation of the show they're about. Also there's the ''Titan'' book series which is about Riker and Troi getting their own ship, which happens to be staffed by every race in the Federation including living rocks, [[awesome|space dinosaurs]] that smell like [[meatbread|toast]] and a [[what|space cyborg ostrich]].

During yet another novel continuity (Star Trek: Destiny), the Borg go nuts and eat Pluto... yeah... and then they finally get sick of the Federation somehow managing to not get assimilated all the time, so they finally just send every last cube they have with orders to Exterminatus the absolute SHIT out of the entire Alpha Quadrant. Pretty much every important character from TNG, DS9, and Voyager has to team up to stop them, and even then the Federation still gets its shit kicked in and winds up having to rely on a vaguely ridiculous deus ex machina to win, and [[Grimdark|billions of people still die and dozens of planets are blown to shit]]. It was pretty insane.

Then all the Federation's main enemies get together to form an anti-Federation and start poking the bear, all the while telling their allies that they're somehow warmongering dicks, Section 31 gets its cover blown in a big way, and Riker gets promoted to Admiral. Also, a lot of the newer TNG novels have been devoted to following up on one-shot aliens from the show, like the guys that sent out the probe that made Barclay super-smart and those fish monks that were abducting crewmembers for experiments. Now that the Picard show is coming out, though, this will all presumably be chucked in the dustbin.

== Video Games ==
=== Star Trek Online ===
''Star Trek Online'' is the free-to-play online game built by Cryptic Studios and run by Perfect World. With an official license CBS, recurring characters voiced by various Trek alumni, and recently a license to include references to the reboot chronology (officially known as the "Kelvin Timeline"), it's the closest existing thing to an "official" continuation of the "Prime" timeline, and contains history and fluff extending nearly 40 years from the end of Star Trek: Nemesis.

Taking place in the 25th century (around the year 2409-2410), the Hobus supernova (the event that kicked Nero and Spock into the past during Star Trek 2009) has devastated the Romulans, and its near-collapse and fragmentation causes tensions between a resurgent Klingon Empire and the Federation. The tensions blow up into a war, with members of a new, nicer, breakaway Romulan Republic playing both sides in exchange for development aid.

The game contains deep cuts from all over Trek lore, and answers questions about what happened to various key characters, including Data (took over the Enterprise-E, then retired), the Enterprise (now an even bigger ship run by Andorian captain Shon), and the Voyager crew (it took Harry Kim 30 years to make Captain lol). Raises barely-shown, unnamed, and otherwise obscure races to new prominence as big bad foes, including the Iconians (ancient aliens with god complexes who mutated into energy beings, currently live in dyson spheres and were only defeated by predestination paradox), Tzenkethi (4-armed halo guys whose weak points are the FRONT of their shields), and Na'kuhl (the alien nazis from Enterprise as time-traveling terrorists who blame the Federation for a throwaway event that happened in TNG's beach episode).

Ostensibly free to play, but don't let that fool you... the ''not-so-micro''transactions are the only reason the lights stay on.

=== Starfleet Command ===

''Starfleet Command'' was a series real time space battle games by Interplay based on the much older tabletop game Star Fleet Battles. It came out in 1999 and was followed by several sequels and expansions. Gameplay was much like ''Battlefleet Gothic'', but with the player only controlling one ship. SFC remains Interplay's best selling game, topping even ''Baldur's Gate''.

=== Armada ===

A series of low effort RTS's churned out by Activision in 2000. Tried to take on both ''Homeworld'' and ''Age of Empires'', both of which have recently gotten HD remakes and ''Armada'' hasn't so that should tell you all you need to know. However, for one of the first 3D model space RTS's it was surprisingly easy to mod, resulting in many ship mod packs being made for it.

== Would you like to know more? ==
And oh Lordy, is there more...
*[http://en.memory-alpha.org/wiki/ Main Memory Alpha: A ''Star Trek'' wiki]
*[http://memory-beta.wikia.com/wiki/ Main Memory Beta: The flip-side of Memory Alpha for the less than official stuff]
*[http://sfdebris.com/ SF Debris: opinionated episode reviews, has some non ''Trek'' stuff as well]

[[Category: Television]]

3.6 Roentgen

2020-09-07T14:40:05Z

2A02:1811:5180:A200:EC3D:29FD:FA1D:618: /* An explanation for the confused */

{{Topquote|Not great, not terrible.|Anatoly Dyatlov, Chernobyl (2019)}}
The maximum dosage of radiation that can be accurately measured by a dosimeter rated for 3.6 roentgen. Side effects may include instant second degree sunburns, spontaneous vomiting, and smoke that glows blue.

When off their homeworld, the [[Death Korps of Krieg]] need at least 3.6 roentgen in their daily diet to stave off lethargy. Their Munitorum issue dietary supplements also work well as hand warmers, and can be piled together to cook meals and recharge lasgun packs.

[[Sly Marbo|Sly Marbo's]] Catachan chili recipe is measured in roentgen instead of the customary scoville units.

==An explanation for the confused==
It's a [[meme]] from a miniseries about the Chernobyl disaster. There are plenty of explanations available from Google, but if you insist: the short version is that the dosimeters at the Chernobyl plant were only rated for measuring 3.6 roentgen (an obsolete unit of measuring radioactivity); the good dosimeters were kept under lock and key<sup>[1]</sup>, and were thus unavailable in the initial hours of the disaster. 3.6 roentgen would be plenty bad, but not horrible--roughly speaking, depending on the radiation, it would equate a less then a 5% increased probability of dying of cancer. Later, more accurate measurements suggested 15,000 roentgen of radiation, meaning the initial estimates were off by a factor of 4000<sup>[2]</sup>. Mixed with Dyatlov's otherwise insane behavior in the hours after the explosion, the entire internet made the man a meme in the aftermath of the 2019 miniseries, with the "3.6 Roentgen" line particularly being widely memed on.

<sup>[1]</sup> Why yes, the Soviet system ''was'' horribly dysfunctional, thanks for asking. To be clear, though, it wasn't really the limitation on the regular dosimeters (3.6 Roentgen is okay for day-to-day operation) or keeping the heavy-duty (and thus expensive) ones under lock. The truly stupendous part is not breaking those out the very instant something weird happen!<br><sup>[2]</sup> For scale, that's a bit like a claim that something is a foot long, when it's actually 3/4 of a mile long; or a claim that something lasted a second when it actually lasted over an hour, or a claim that something lasted an hour when it actually lasted ''5 months''.

[[Category:Meme]]

Section d'infanterie/Chasseurs

2020-09-07T11:12:01Z

2A02:1811:5180:A200:EC3D:29FD:FA1D:618: typos

{{topquote|My centre is giving way, my right is retreating, situation excellent, I am attacking.|Ferdinand Foch}}
[[File:TFR702.jpg|right|300px|thumb|Phillipe! Do you see les commies?]]
Now here's a confusing unit.

You've got enough stationary ROF to make a Soviet infantry general shit his pants, yet your own men are liable to do so first. The FAMAS combines volume of fire with range and 5+ FP, so a full strength platoon can turn PACT companies into bloody sieves before they can get close enough to even fire back. Despite this, French doctrine dictates a kind of hit & run method of engagement and your men ''will'' run away under any extended pressure. What anti-tank output you have is either negligible or increases unit costs, so besides a Milan or two that may or may not be there, these platoons are not terribly viable for AT duty. Your LRACs will still punch through tanks from the side if you get the chance, while an APILAS can go through the front of most NATO tanks. Whether your troops can actually get into a position to do so is another question.

Transport-wise, you can take either the [[AMX-10P]] or the [[VAB]] depending on whether your formation is a Section de chasseurs or a Section d'infantrie respectively. Chasseurs can take one more Milan than the infanterie.

==Section d'infanterie==
[[File:TFR702-25.jpg|300px|left|thumb|Les stats, colonel!]]
===Team Yankee===
The infantrie sections trade IFVs for more infantry: a 6 point platoon comes with 5 FAMAS teams and 2 LRACs with 3 [[VAB]]s, while an 8 point platoon comes with 7 FAMAS teams, 2 LRACs and 4 [[VAB]]s. The mathematically brilliant among you would immediately realize that you do not get more anti-armour with the larger platoon: consider getting three smaller platoons rather than two large platoons if you feel the need for more close range anti-armour.

You may replace one LRAC with an APILAS for an additional point, or purchase a Milan team for one point: note that they do not get their own VAB.

As a formation, the infanterie gain access to one of the three platoons: [[AMX-30]]s, [[AMX-10 RC]]s or dedicated Milan section. Yes, almost exactly the same thing that made the British overpowered in the Stripes meta. Your choice would depend on what exactly you wanted your infantry to do. [[AMX-30]]s and [[AMX-10 RC]]s fill the same role in slightly different manners: read their pages for an in-depth comparison. If you want staying power, the Milans will anchor your trenchline with the power of 8 Milan shots per turn.

A strong unit of infantry that will hold the line and fight infantry in urban settings very well, but lacks the morale to sustain losses.

===IRL===
In addition to representing motorized infantry very accurately, this unit can also represent French Foreign Legion troops or Régiment d'Infanterie de Marine (RIMa) in terms of armament. While these expeditionary units are considered elite infantry with superior morale than the line infantry portrayed here, this unit is a homebrewer's wet dream with minimal changes needed to represent other French Army units.

==Section de chasseurs==
[[File:TFR702-27.jpg|left|thumb|300px|Really? Are you making a call now...]]
===Team Yankee===
The chasseur sections are smaller but come with [[AMX-10P]] IFVs: a 5 point platoon comes with 3 FAMAS teams, 2 LRACs and 3 [[AMX-10P]]s, while a 7 point platoon gets you 5 FAMAS teams, 2 LRACs and 4 [[AMX-10P]]s: not enough to repulse a company of PACT infantry, unless supported by their transports.

You may replace one LRAC with an APILAS for an additional point, or purchase two Milan teams and an AMX-10P for two points. Note that bringing IFVs changes the role of these units drastically: your infantry lose much of their staying power while your APCs actually become threats to light vehicles and helicopters. This only makes them marginally better suited on the offensive, chasseurs have never done well in the open since the days of Ypres.

For a rather average price, you get a unit of cheap but mediocre IFVs and a platoon with passable rocket launchers but has the firepower to hurt infantry in firefights. 5+ morale may become a problem though: deploy them in bulletproof cover at all times, you do not have the ability to sustain casualties from assaults or moving in the open.

As a formation, you can take a third chasseur platoon, and either an [[AMX-30]] platoon or a fourth platoon of chasseurs.

===IRL===

[[File:French infantry.jpg|300px|right|thumb|Modern Frenchmen, defending the land of love and cheese.]]
Here's a brain twister: the French Army uses ''Chasseur'' as a regimental title rather than a mission designation. The term (literally: someone who gives chase, or a hunter) was used to refer to light infantry units from the Napoleonic Era that specialized in rapid (re)deployment, combat in difficult terrain like swamps, scouting, and sharpshooting. Chasseurs could therefore mean a unit of mountain infantry (Chasseurs Alpins), or parachute infantry (Régiments de chasseurs parachutistes), for example. Chasseur is also a title for ACTUAL light infantry (Bataillons de chasseurs) who performed roughly the same role as their forefathers. The models represented in-game are Régiments de chasseurs, the French designation for armored infantry operating at the battalion level (800~ men): the Régiment title is ALSO honorary, and meant to distinguish between light infantry Chasseurs and armored 'cavalry' Chasseurs.

Naming aside, the models are rather accurate in representing their real-life counterparts: mobile and versatile units capable of attacking and defending in equal measure.

{{French Forces in Team Yankee}}
[[Category:Team Yankee]]

Tankbustas

2020-09-05T10:02:55Z

2A02:1811:5180:A200:EC3D:29FD:FA1D:618: /* Crunch */

[[File:Ork Tankbustas.jpg|300px|right|thumb|Tankbustas take the meaning of "Dynamite fishing" to a whole new level.]]

<span style='color:#33aa33;font-size:110%'> '''"When da 'umies come. In their shinin' canz. Who yah gonna call? TANKBUSTA!"''' </span> - Warboss Reff-Ranz describing the Tankbusta crew.

Many Orks enjoy the odd explosion. These guys like that so much that they decided to get into a nice squad of 5-15 boys who have the same opinion on the best thing to do in a <span style='color:green;font-size:110%'>WAAAGH</span> and try blowing tanks sky high with their rokkits. [[Awesome| They also train Squigs to run into tanks while strapped to the hilt with explosives]]. <s>[https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anti-tank_dog (Like the entirety of the Imperial Guard, this idea was stolen from WW2 Russia)].</s> {{BLAM}} {{BLAM|HERESY! THE IMPERIUM WOULD NEVER STEAL TACTICS!}} <span style="color:#33aa33;'''">'''*KRUMP* DEM 'UMIES KEEP GETTIN IN 'ERE BOSS!'''

And if neither of that works, run into close-combat and [[Awesome|strike the tank with a rokkit attached to a metal stick]]. They get so high off this that they will enter the broken vehicle, eat any survivors, and drink the motor oil in a ritual act known as <span style='color:#33aa33;font-size:110%'> '''"GETTIN' TANKED!"''' </span> And thus the '''Tankbustas''' came to be.

==Fluff==
Just as primitive hunters might claim a gruesome trophy from a fallen beast to better brag of its demise, so will Tankbustaz strip the choicest loot from the wreckage of a ruined tank, as any Ork finds something glorious in being able to boast about killing something twenty times his size. Colourful hull plates are hammered into crude armour, internal gubbins worn proudly as warrior jewellery, and the flayed skins of crewmen are draped round the Tankbustaz' shoulders like pelts. Within a Tankbusta mob, competition is fierce to be the first to get a kill, or to get the most impressive explosion.

== Crunch ==

As of 8th edition Tankbustas are one of the Orks' best sources of reliable anti-tank firepower, and are generally a good elites slot in any ork army. Tankbustas have the Tank Hunters rule, allowing re-rolls of all hit rolls (melee and shooting) that target Vehicle units. As such, they do a frighteningly good job of blowing up vehicles that are within range of their Rokkit Launchas. Throw em in a transport such as a [[Trukk]] or an open-topped [[Battlewagon]] and just have them drive around while firing rokkits at everything. Although the AP -2 of the Rokkit Launcha isn't amazing, this is largely mitigated by the reliable damage output of 3 wounds per hit. In short, you only need 4 solid, unsaved Rokkit hits to kill a [[Leman Russ Battle Tank]], and that is something that a full-strength Tankbusta mob is very capable of delivering. Don't be afraid of the Bomb Squigs either, they got better AND got a price cut. Furthermore, despite the name, Tankbustas are also devastating against most Monstrous Creatures (who tend to be T5-6 with 3+ saves) as well as any expensive MEQ or worse armored models (like crisis suits, tyranid warriors, and wraithguards) and can blow up MEQs in a pinch if there's nothing else to shoot. Even against Daemons and Tyranids where you'd think they'd have nothing to shoot at, those monstrous creatures are all pretty vulnerable to S8 shots flying into their faces. And with all the rokkit shots you even have a good chance at hitting fliers too.

If Tankbustas have a weakness, it's the fact that like most Orks they are wearing a T-shirt for armor and also that any opponent with a brain will do everything he can to eliminate them.

[[File:Ork_tankbusta_squigs.gif|200px|left|thumb|If mindless aggression and explosiveness seems like a really bad combo, that's because you're boring, and also not a goddamn Ork trophy-hunter]]

'''Bomb-Squigs''' - The Bomb Squig counts as a member of the mob, although there is no Morale impact if one dies. The Bomb Squig carries, wait for it, a Squig Bomb. The Squig Bomb hits on a WS and BS of 2+ and the Squig is expended when "fired" (nothing happens if you roll a 1 to hit). And by expended, we mean the Squig literally blows up right after experiencing a brief moment of disappointment at not finding a tasty snack under that nearby tank. This attack is resolved at S8 Ap -2 D6 wounds. It is therefore possible to have a max size mob of 15 Tankbustas supplemented by 3 Bomb Squigs.

'''Tankhammers''' - The Tankhammer serves as a melee weapon that replaces a model's rokkit launcher. If the Tankhammer hits, the target suffers D3 mortal wounds; the downside is that the model bearing the weapon is also killed. This probably has something to do with the unhealthy fact that the "hammer" portion of the weapon consists of about 50 pounds of high-explosive ordnance that has been duct-taped together. While a tankhammer could potentially be useful for finishing off a high-value target, in all honesty it's not a great choice. This is because it reduces the mob's greatest strength, which is shooting, while ''also'' encouraging the action that it is least effective at, which is melee. Therefore you're probably better off just using Bomb Squigs to achieve a similar effect.

'''Rokkit Pistols''' - One in every five Tankbustas may replace his Rokkit Launcha with a pair of Rokkit Pistols. These count as a single weapon that have a profile of 12" Range, Pistol 2, S7, AP -2, and D3 wounds. Whether those are a good thing or not depends on what you're facing: generally speaking you want your Tankbustas harassing high toughness targets at range with regular Rokkit Launchas, but if you're facing a choppy army where it is more a case of 'when' rather than 'if' they're going to be forced into melee, then those extra S7 AP -2 D3 attacks right before getting stuck in are a boon.

'''Dedicated Transport''' - In 8th edition it is now a very simple matter to have Trukk-mounted Tankbustas. 12 rerollable rokkits a turn out of a Trukk is dangerous- yeah, that's an understatement. And guess what, any Bomb Squigs you take can still fling themselves out of the vehicle at the enemy because they count as a ranged attack.

[[Category: Warhammer 40,000]]

[[Category: Xenos]]

[[Category: Orks]]

[[Category: Kult of Speed]]

[[Category: Squigs]]

{{Template:Orks-Forces}}

Video games

2020-09-03T13:47:18Z

2A02:1811:5180:A200:EC3D:29FD:FA1D:618: /* Strategy Games */

{{/vg/}}

Video games are games played with an electronic device, instead of paper, pens, dice, boards, anything traditional, and most of the time omitting your imagination too. It is also true that they do contain amusing game mechanics, can be easily played alone, provide visual and auditory representation, and don't [[Games Workshop|cost hundreds of dollars for a few miniature visual representations]]; however, this does come at the cost of freedom, physical being, social skills, and imagination.

Many traditional or tabletop games (like WH40K and D&D) can now be played as using electronic devices to substitute for their tactile components like maps or minis, proving once again that technology continues to screw up [[Old School Roleplaying|everything that we all wished had remained as it was.]] A [[VASSAL Game Engine|virtual tabletop simulator]] has been released so you may play a tabletop game with friends out of town. Also, we have an article at [[List of Vidya Board Games]] to cover various tabletop adaptions into the digital realm.

Electronic games played by strange, [[what|electronic fa/tg/uys]] have been accepted by /tg/, so that any game can be traditional, and this media fits right in with the old [[Board Game|board games]] and Tabletop [[Wargame]]s we all know and love. Some video games are accepted and enjoyed by /tg/. Many, however, are not. Generally, video game threads, especially games with no corresponding /tg/ version/interest, belong on /v/ instead.

You'll find quite a few /v/ related articles on 1d4chan because some video games have at least some relation to /tg/ and because 1d4chan tends to draw in people who are fans of WH40K universe primarily through [[Dawn of War]], even if these people don't actually play the tabletop game. And lets be honest here, 1d4chan is as much a page for WH40K fans as it is for fa/tg/uys so these people are certainly welcome here.

==Strategy Games ==
[[Image:Keen.gif|right|300px]]
* Simulation/Sandbox
** '''[[Dwarf Fortress]]'''
** '''Aurora 4X, a.k.a Dwarf Fortress in space with MUCH more complicated details'''
** '''From The Depths'''
** '''Kerbal Space Program'''
** '''Medieval Engineers'''
*** '''Space Engineers'''
** '''[[Minecraft]]''', for some odd reason.
** '''[[Terraria]]''', for the same odd reason.
** '''Mount and Blade''', it's expandalone Warband, and the new Bannerlord 2. A sandbox medieval setting, you go around either being a bandit or uniting the scattered kingdoms into a grand empire or whatever. Enormous modding community means finding something thematically different if you want, including Warhammer and historical mods.
** '''Rimworld''', Dwarf Fortress ''IN SPEHSS'' except dumbed down for the casuals, [[skub|which may or may not be a good thing.]]
** '''[[Space Station 13]]:''' Dwarf Fortress except you play as the dwarves. Has been completely fucking ruined by goons leaking into every other version of the game.
** '''[[Tabletop Simulator]]''', a virtual tabletop for playing Card Games, Board Games, RPGs, etc. online with friends. The game has multiple built-in tools for creating custom games, and the Steam Workshop has thousands of add-ons; a popular choice for playing WH40K online thanks to ripped assets from Dawn of War.
** '''[[VASSAL Game Engine|VASSAL Engine]]'''

* 4X/Grand Strategy
** '''Age of Wonders''' - Take ''Master of Magic'', then make it good. Due to reasons, the most approved is 2nd game, as it strikes balance between being its own unique thing, having good campaign and not sacrificing gameplay in the process
** '''Civilization I-IV''' - Civilization actually was based on a board game and in a case of coming full circle, ended up creating it's own board game.
*** (Note: Civs V and VI have design issues that make them difficult to recommend in this list, and are thus explicitly not included--that being said, this exclusion is more on the basis of them being [[Skub]]ish--some people love V and/or VI, while some people hate them.)
** '''[[Disciples]]''' (series) - Heroes of Might and Magic made [[Grimdark]].
** '''[[Dominions]]''' - Civilization's and Dwarf Fortress' beautiful love child. Enjoy [[Lovecraft]]'s Father Dagon square up against Ravana from India's Ramayana as they fight for the glory of their respective gods (you and whatever other [[neckbeards]] you are playing with).
** '''[[Heroes of Might and Magic]]''' - Turn based strategy of over six main games and expansions where you control a fantasy hero and their legion of men/elves/dwarves/creatures/etc. Special mention goes to second and especially third installments.
**'''Master of Magic''': Take Sid Meier's Civilization. Add fantasy races with their own units, magic in the form of spells and summons, heroes and a very basic isometric battlefield when armies clash, and give dozens of abilities to units according to their species, situation and metal they are armed with (Yes, the metal used can be mithril or adamantite if the building city has any). That's Master of Magic. Still great for when you need to scratch that 'wizard with no sense of right or wrong bent on conquering the world' itch.
** '''Masters of Orion'''
** '''[[Alpha Centauri|Sid Meier's Alpha Centauri]]'''
** '''Sengoku Rance''': [[Weeaboo|Hentai game spinoff]] that parodies the long-running ''Nobunaga's Ambition'' series. You play as Rance, [[Slaanesh]]'s very own [[Kharn|fun guy to be around,]] as he unifies Warring States-era Japan under his mighty [[Anal circumference|"hyperweapon."]] Despite the utterly ludicrous premise it's a solid grand strategy game, to the point that the porn is more of a reward for playing well than an end in itself. Comparing this game to Total War was a common troll on /gsg/ when Shogun II was released.
** '''Endless Space'''
** '''[[Endless Legend]]'''
** '''Distant Worlds'''
** Paradox series: This is the go-to company for nation-ruling Grand Strategy games for different eras such as '''[[Crusader Kings]]''' 800's-1400's, '''[[Europa Universalis]]''' 1400's-1800's, '''[[Victoria]]''' 1820's-1936, or '''[[Hearts of Iron]]''' 1936-1950's.
*** [http://steamcommunity.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=406933979 Warhammer: Geheimnisnacht], a Warhammer Fantasy conversion for Crusader Kings II. Setting predates Winds of Chaos & End Times.
** '''[[Stellaris]]''' (Paradox's attempt to fill the gap in the market between their Grand Strategy games and traditional 4X) So much depth even without mods, it has a page now. You can run *any* science fiction staple idea and none would look out of place. A civilisation of individuals ranging from unique megacorporations to generic governments, hive-minded eusocial species, robots and anything in between have each unique playstyles. It also has endgame "crises" of galaxy threatening proportions which needs elaborate teamwork to stop.
*** Excellent 40k mod for Stellaris: https://stellaris.paradoxwikis.com/WarhammerTotalConversion
*** And yes, there's Star Trek and Star Wars mods.
** '''[[Total War]]''' series: '''Rome Total War''', '''Medieval Total War''', '''Empire Total War''', '''Shogun Total War'''
*** Rome 1 mods: '''Call to Arms: Warhammer''' and '''Fourth Age Total War''' and Medieval 2 mods: '''[[Call of Warhammer]]''', '''Third Age Total War'''
** '''[[Hearts of Iron]]''': Has its own page for a more detailed look, let's just say here that /tg/ likes themselves a bit of Axis vs. Allies action, and this series deliver.

* Real-time Strategy
** '''Age of Empires''' series. Classic RTS with a more Command and Conquer vibe then a 4X, which is more common for historical settings, though pretty much every unit has multiple counters so it tends to be a more complex game then normal fast pace RTSs. There's the original, which is a curiosity at best, the second game that is made of pure gold, Mythology that mixes up the formula well, the third which sadly is more just Mythology with guns and Online which is F2P game and also dead (unless you play Project Celeste, which is still getting updated by fans). First, Second and Mythology have really good HD remasters. First and Second have also 4k remakes (not remaster), called Definitive Editions. Second and Mythology are worth grabbing, but if you had to choose one choose 2. They are currently developing the next game in the series, AoE IV.
** '''Battlezone''', the strategy game not the arcade game. Mixture of real time strategy and hover tank combat while fighting commies on the moon. Clunky, and as balanced as a one legged hippo, but it's uniqueness, concept and immersion make it a classic. Got a second game that was tighter and better balanced but weaker plot and setting. Both got pretty decent HD remasters.
** '''[[Command and Conquer]]''', a franchise with more then four different series running at the time where you control varied forces trying to beat the crap out of each other.
** '''Company of Heroes''' and '''Men of War''' series which are basically RTSs based on the idea of commanding forces as if someone was playing a classic WW2 shooter. While there are hard counters in Company of Heroes it still focuses more on holding chokepoints, piecing defensive lines and utilizing sandbags and barbed wire. Men at War focuses on realistic damage and as such is more the ARMA to Company of Heroes Call of Duty 2.
** '''Cossacks''' series, which covers 17th and 18th century, being the closest to /tg/'s desire to have "pike and shot setting". Most notable for ability to field absolutely gigantic armies of thousands upon thousands of soldiers.
*** '''American Conquest''' is an off-shot mini-series, expanding game mechanics from Cossacks and covering the period between Cortes conquest of Aztec Empire till American Revolutionary War. An expansion is dedicated to American Civil War.
** '''Cultures''' series, but most importantly first two games. A Viking village sim
** '''Dungeon Keeper''', where you play as an evil overlord defending against pesky adventurers and goodie-two-shoes trying to conquer your dungeon, and play it like Sims on crack.
** '''Homeworld''': THE iconic space video game of the early 00's. Basically Battlestar Galactica if the Galactica was tall instead of long. Borrows heavily from the artwork of [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chris_Foss Chris Foss].
** '''Original War''', most notable for its unique mix of RPG and RTS elements, with each unit representing an individual character with own backstory, personality and set of skills.
** '''Patrician 3: Rise of the Hansa''' is pretty standard (and good) economic-transport sim, but it makes up with being related with the titular Hansa and the Baltic region during Late Medieval, which rarely show up as a setting despite being what is represented as '''the''' ISO Standard Medieval setting.
** '''Railroad Tycoon 2''' comes with absolutely amazing series of scenarios and an unique, fleshed out post-apo setting. No, not kidding. There are also dozens of fan-made maps further expanding on said setting.
** '''Rise of Nations''' and especially '''Rise of Legends''' which had a steampunk faction and a "totally not the baddies from stargate" faction
** '''The Settlers''' series
** '''[[Starcraft]]''' and '''[[Warcraft]]''': [[Skub|40K and Fantasy rip-offs respectively]], although they were so successful that from video gamers' perspective <del>the jedi are evil</del> ''GW should be paying Blizzard''.
** '''Supreme Commander'''
** '''Theocracy''', in which you control one of Mesoamerican tribes with a goal of unifying the region.
** '''Total Annihilation'''

* Turn-based Strategy
** '''[[Advance Wars|Advance Wars]]''' - It's like Panzer General but [[Anime]]. Except for '''Days of Ruin'''; that game is [[Grimdark]] and thus [[Fist of the North Star|manly]].
** '''[[Fire Emblem]]''' - Advance Wars' twin brother who likes swords and magic rather than guns and tanks. Fire Emblem has heavy RPG elements, tasking you with managing a stable of characters with limited EXP to go around and the specter of permadeath hanging overhead. ''Awakening'' and later installments are not approved for being [[Weeaboo|waifu delivery systems cleverly disguised as strategy games.]]
** '''Jagged Alliance I''' & '''II''', A PMC is you!
** '''[[King of Dragon Pass]]'''
** '''Panzer General''' - The first decent "Tabletop WW2 meets PC" back in '94, it's the second inspiration for [[Nazi Equipment]] and is the Mecca of wehraboo'ism. Spawned an entire series of games.
*** Of note from that series: '''Fantasy General''', which is, other than some rather questionable AI balancing, a fairly fun "D&D Wargame" style affair.
** '''Recettear: An Item Shop's Tale''' a Japanese game about running a shop, which sells and buys items used by dungeon-crawling adventurers. Much more engaging than it sounds and full of cutting humour. Capitalism, ho!
** '''Valkyria Chronicles''' series - JRPG fantasy world version of World War II. Quite a bit of depth and supporting cast of characters.
** The original '''[[X-Com|X-COM: UFO Defense]]'''
** The new '''[[X-Com|XCOM: Enemy Unknown]]''' and its sequel, '''XCOM 2'''.
*** XCOM and XCOM 2 mods: '''The Long War'''. Both versions add dramatically to their respective games, transforming them from comparatively quick, light experiences to fatigue-worn wars. Buckle up. Plays a lot like Valkyria Chronicles except with destructable terrain and lots of chest-high walls.

==Role-Playing Games==
*[[cRPG]]s
** '''Albion'''
** '''[[Arcanum]]: Of Steamworks and Magick Obscura'''
** '''Arx Fatalis'''
** '''[[Baldur's Gate]] I''' & '''II'''
** '''Battle for Wesnoth'''
** '''Betrayal at Krondor'''
** '''Darklands'''
** '''Deus Ex''' series
** '''Dungeons & Dragons Gold Box Series'''
** '''[[The Elder Scrolls]]''' especially Daggerfall, and Morrowind
** '''[[Fallout]]''' series
** '''[[Icewind Dale]]'''
** '''[[Neverwinter Nights]]'''
** '''Might and Magic from 1 to 8, then X. [[Squats|Might and Magic 9 does not exist.]]
** '''[[Planescape: Torment]]'''
** '''System Shock''' series
** '''The Temple of Elemental Evil'''
** '''[[Ultima]]''' series
** '''Underrail'''
** '''[[Vampire: The Masquerade]] - ''Bloodlines/Redemption'''''
** '''Wasteland''' series
** '''[[Wizardry: Proving Grounds of the Mad Overlord]]'''

*Modern RPGs
** '''The Banner Saga'''
** '''Dark Souls''', due to its moody [[Berserk]]-inspired atmosphere, emphasis on exploration, and [[Dwarf Fortress|merciless learning curve]]. Compelling story and characters are a major plus, also contains large amounts of death and [[RAGE]]. The tagline isn't 'Prepare to Die' for no reason.
*** To a lesser extent, the other "Souls" games ('''Demon's Souls''', '''Dark Souls 2''', '''Dark Souls 3''', and '''Bloodborne''').
** '''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''
** '''Dragon Age: Origins''', much better than later games.
** '''Expeditions: Conquistador''' and '''Viking'''
** '''Fallout: New Vegas'''
** '''Legend of Grimrock'''
** '''Mass Effect 1 and 2'''
** '''Middle-Earth: Shadow of Mordor'''
** '''Pillars of Eternity'''
** '''Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic''', both games are very good
** '''[[The Witcher]]''' series
** '''Pathfinder [[Kingmaker]]'''

==Adventure Games==
* '''Beneath a Steel Sky''': Great cyberpunk themes and rich imagery. Released as freeware by the original developers.
* '''Blade Runner''': It's a Blade Runner game and it's one of the best things that ever happened in the genre, no need for more recommendations.
* '''Broken Sword''' series: Templars, ancient conspiracies, interesting characters and well-written plot that is mineable even for tabletop games
* '''The DIG''': A bunch of astronauts stop an asteroid from hitting earth, only to find out it's really an alien starship that whisks them to a desolate planet on the other side of the galaxy whose inhabitants - who have a huge fetish for the platonic solids - are nowhere to be found. Features a lot of really complex hard-science plot points, difficult-as-fuck puzzles, and Steve Blum as an arrogant German scientist.
* '''King's Quest: Heir Today Gone Tomorrow''': Just read the title and ask yourself what the game can be about.
* '''Monkey Island''' series: One of the most definitive things to ever happen to the genre, plus it's a great pirate-themed series that both spoofs and reaffirms a lot of cliches related with own content.
* '''Policenauts''': Early Hideo Kojima makes a game where Lethal Weapon meets cyberpunk.
* '''The Prince and the Coward''': A Polish game that can be best summed up as "ISO Standard Medieval Fantasy gets the ''Monkey Island'' treatment". An excellent fan-translation exists that manages to keep the original tone.
* '''Pathologic''' (also known as '''Pestilence''' or '''Мор. Утопия'''): a truly bizzare and unique Russian game, combining adventure, survival, role-playing and lots of nightmarish vibes. Boasts a head-ache inducting lore and a persistent world, so things roll regardless if player interfeers or not. Got a HD re-release recently with proper translation, thus non-Slavs can finally enjoy the game properly too - previous English translation was a nightmare by itself.
* '''Professor Layton''' series: A refined gentleman investigates mysteries by solving lateral-thinking puzzles. Beautiful watercolor art and solid writing, though the puzzle setups become increasingly absurd as the series goes on. A great series to mine for dungeon puzzles. Any games after the first six are not approved, due to the writing devolving into cliche anime bullshit and a distinct drop in puzzle quality after the death of designer Akira Tago.
* '''[[Star Control]]''' series: A mess of alien races in the grand tradition of Niven et al. kill the shit out of each other. First game is turn-based strategy, second game is somewhere between an RPG and an adventure game; both have a surprisingly deep arcade combat system. The second game was released as open-source software by the developers.
* '''ARK: Survival Evolved''': You wake up on the sandy beach of a giant space station built by unknown entities (either aliens or far future humans) with [[Dinosaur|dinosaurs.]] You make them your bitch and ascend to the next ARKs (which are DLC). Lots of people want to raise an army of Rexs, but each dino species has their own utility when tamed, with many being biome-specific, encouraging players to explore and hunt down rare or powerful dinos. The game is available in single player mode, but multiplayer is highly encouraged as the difficulty of taming or fighting the local fauna can be overwhelming in the mid-to-late game; this adds a dynamic of tribal warfare as different tribes will claim territory and compete for resources in a single map, with ARK's biggest tameable dinosaur being used exclusively for siege warfare.
** There are a bunch of DLCs we're not going to go into here. They're recommended, that's all we need to say.

==Warhammer Games==
*Strategy
** The old and glorious '''[[Warhammer Epic 40,000: Final Liberation]]''', [[Warhammer: Shadow of the Horned Rat| '''Shadow of the Horned Rat''', and '''Dark Omen''']]
** [[Warhammer: Mark of Chaos|'''Mark of Chaos''']]
** '''[[Dawn of War|WH40K Dawn of War]]''' and its [[Dawn of War II|sequel]]. As well as the [[Dawn of War III|sequel sequel]]
*** The "True-to-Tabletop" [[Dawn of War Mods|mods]] for DoW that sprung up, such as '''Firestorm over ''Kronus/Kaurava''''', the '''Closer to Codex''' mod. Really, just look at the page to see how many there are.
** '''[[Chapter Master (game)]]'''
** '''[[Mordheim: City Of The Damned]]'''
** '''[[Battlefleet Gothic: Armada]]'''
** '''[[Total War: WARHAMMER]]''' and its [[Total War: Warhammer II|sequel]]
** '''[[Man o' War: Corsair]]'''
** '''[[Warhammer 40,000: Sanctus Reach]]''' - A turn base strategy game where you playing as everybody's favourite [[Space Wolves|space wolf viking]] fighting against the Orks in Sanctus Reach. Later DLC allowed you playing as the Ork led by Da Big Red and everybody's favorite [[Imperial Guard|wall of guns]]. Also Imperial Knights, fuck yeah!
**'''[[Space Hulk]]''' in its many iterations, including [[Alien Assault|the unofficial one]].
**'''[[Warhammer 40,000: Gladius - Relics of War]]'''
**'''[[Warhammer 40,000: Mechanicus]]'''
*Other
** '''[[Blood Bowl]] and its sequel'''
** <s>'''[[Warhammer Online|Warhammer Age of Reckoning]]'''</s> Shut down thanks to EA. Go play the private server version!
** '''[[Warhammer 40,000: Space Marine]]'''
** '''[[Warhammer 40,000: Eternal Crusade]]'''
** '''[[The End Times:Vermintide]]''' and [[Vermintide 2|its sequel]]
** '''Warhammer 40,000: [[Freeblade]]'''
** '''[[Space Hulk: Deathwing]]'''

==Miscellaneous==
* [[Roguelike|Roguelikes]]
** '''Cataclysm: Dark Days Ahead''' a post-apocalyptic top-down survival game that looks like Dwarf Fortress with a texture pack and lets you drive cars into zombies.
** '''Cultist Simulator''' is a grind-heavy, card-based game about being too curious about things that no man should know about and slowly building a cult to some demonic abomination... or die trying.
** '''Curious Expedition''' which pokes fun at the pulp adventure genre; think Hollow Earth as a black comedy
** '''[[Darkest Dungeon]]''' the newest [[H.P. Lovecraft|love-craftian]] dungeon crawler with grimdark setting and overall edginess.
** '''Don't Starve''' a pretty-looking survival and exploration game that's fun with friends, and does horror like ''The Grim Adventures of Billy and Mandy''.
** '''[[Dungeon Crawl]] Stone Soup'''
** '''Nethack'''
** ''' NEOScavenger''' much like Cataclysm (gameplay, genre, even the setting is similar), an exploration hex-crawl to surpass all hex-crawls.
** '''Pathway''', the closest thing to having Hollow Earth Expedition vidya
** '''Pixel Dungeon and it's forks''' coffee break roguelike optimized for phones. FOSS so there's tons of forks. Shattered Pixel Dungeon is a very good version and is on Android Play Store and F-Droid
** ''' Sunless Sea''' and '''Sunless Skies''' Adventuring out into a WTF eldrich horror setting under the flag of Victorian Britain. Gameplay-wise, the games are just awful grinders, but it's their setting and quests that make them interesting, as long as comically dark settings are your thing.
** '''TEARDOWN''', a Space-Hulk roguelike
** '''WarpRogue''', a 40K-inspired roguelike

*Good FPS games
** '''Bioshock''' series: Bunch of retro-aesthetics crammed into FPS games with what passes as a rich plot and world-building within the genre. Arguing over its concent used to be prime [[skub]] material, now it's mostly forgotten.
** '''Borderlands 2''', a memetic lolsrandom dumb game, but special mention goes to '''Tiny Tina's Assault on Dragon Keep''' DLC, as it is a role-playing session involving main characters, with all the crazy hijinks of Borderlands involved.
** '''Crysis''', Three games provide a very moddable engine with a very versatile set of physics combined with a pretty absurdly large modding community that has among other things, created a perfectly workable Mech Warrior game out of Crysis Warhead. Even if you don't care for nanosuit action, the mods alone are worth checking out.
** '''Deep Rock Galactic''' [[Squat]]s the video game. Space Dwarfs armed with big guns go digging into a mineral rich planet infested with [[Tyranid|giant bugs]].
** '''[[Doom|DOOM]]''', '''Hexen''', and '''Heretic''': With a vibrant community because the games are easy to mod and has produced no shortage of mods (or WADs as they're called in the community (officially, the file extension 'WAD' means 'Where's All the Data?').) Interestingly, Doom was inspired by a D&D game run with Lead Dev John Carmack as the DM. Director John Romero's character recklessly gave a dark tome to a demon in exchange for the magic Daikatana which caused demons to overrun the material plane and the world to end. Visually, parts of the games (Hexen and Heretic especially) are reminiscent of a gothic dungeon.
** '''Escape From Butcher Bay''' a Riddick-licensed game that combines great stealth elements with even better combat sequences and a slight horror vibe, all in the sauce made off used future aesthetics.
** '''[[EYE: Divine Cybermancy]]''': A really weird FPS/RPG due to its cyberpunk fantasy aesthetics, almost an RPG. Extremely buggy due to being a Source Engine game that wasn't made by Valve. The developers absolutely love Warhammer 40,000, made the setting for EYE a lawyer-friendly clone of 40k, and were eventually hired by GW to [[Space Hulk: Deathwing|make the 40k game they wanted to make in the first place.]]
** '''Far Cry''' series, which has completely different tone depending on installment and is just one huge mine of ideas for extremely pulpy scenarios. Special mention goes to Far Cry 3, which pretty much reinvented the franchise, and its standalone expansion Blood Dragon, which is [[Old School Roleplaying|a hilarious parody of the 80s neon aesthetic.]] ''Primal'' and later installments are not approved for being either heavily rehashed or just completely unnecessary.
** '''Guns of Icarus''', a steampunk flying team deathmatch with set roles.
** '''Iron Storm''' - it's 1964 and the World War I is still going on, with complete stalemate perpetuated by industrialists on both sides. Your mission is to infiltrate and destroy nuclear program of the "bad" side. W40k games ''wish'' they were this good in presenting endless, sensless war.
** '''Kingdom Come: Deliverance''', a truly generic story of "from zero to hero", involving blacksmith's son climbing the social ladder of medieval society until knighthood. But what makes the game unique is the fact it's a historical RPG, set in specific area of Bohemia during a specific period with autistic levels of research behind it, providing more data about its own setting than your typical edutainment game.
** '''Penumbra series''': The easiest way to describe it is to call it modern take on At the Mountains of Madness, only set in Greenland and with massive conspiracy looming over the story. Warning, '''very''' tense horror games (while avoiding jump scares) with unique control and physics system, so it might not be your cup of tea.
** '''Quake''': At least the early games, for similar reasons for DOOM (they were both made by the same company). Quake 1 is a good and challenging FPS that takes cues from Lovecraft in terms of environments and monster designs. Quake 2 is somewhat easier, but is deliciously grimdark sci-fi; it's about fighting cyborg aliens that make more of themselves by capturing conquered races and fitting them with cybernetics/forcing them into a hivemind against their will.
** '''[[Team Fortress 2]]''', a game descended from a Quake mod now over 10 years old and still going strong, is a multiplayer FPS with a 1960s theme where players pick a team, one of 9 different classes, and battle to the death. Also, hats. Two hats in this game are 40k references, allowing you to dress your Heavy up as an Ork.
** '''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.''' series: Roadside Picnic: The Video Game. A nice combination of free roaming, excellent gunplay, tense atmosphere and really freaky lore.
** '''Thief 1 & 2''', the grand daddy of stealth games, with one of the most original settings ever created for games (a combination of industrial - but not steampunk - medieval and paganic elements). Strong story, good characters and makes you feel like a master thief indeed. Reboot from 2014 is unapproved and shunned.
** '''Wolfenstein''' series: Combines sci-fi, fantasy and World War II elements amidst the Nazi-killing.

*Good TPS games
** '''Max Payne 1 & 2''' Finest product of the neo-noir genre, especially the second game. Amazingly strong story in both games, with a lot of Norse references in the first one. Also, the game that introduced bullet time as game mechanics.
** '''Prince of Persia''', especially the ''Sands of Time'' trilogy. Accept no substitute for Arabian Nights game.
** '''Tomb Raider series''' Preferably games created by original studio, Core Design, but anything up to Underworld goes. A swift balance between serious and pulp tone, providing simple plots and a more and more complex locations. Also, good source of creative traps. Reboot from 2013 and what follows are disapproved and shunned, being just generic cover shooter. Comes with its own, massive level-making scene, known collectively as '''TRLE''' (after Tomb Raider Level Editor), which by itself is fantastic source of dungeon design, creative traps and excellent puzzles that are all very minable.

* [[Mechwarrior]], because /tg/ loves [[Battletech]].
** '''MechWarrior I''' is lauded as a classic, and thus the best
** '''MechWarrior II''' is lauded as the best
** '''MechWarrior III''' is lauded as the most engrossing storywise, and thus the best
** '''MechWarrior IV''' is lauded as the latest and greatest, and thus the best
** '''MechCommander II''' is lauded as most like the tabletop, and thus the best
** '''MechWarrior: Living Legend''' is lauded as best for multiplayer, and thus the best
** '''MechWarrior Online''' is the worst
** '''MechWarrior V''' is the newest, therefore both the best AND worst
* Classic console games
** '''Jet Set/Grind Radio''' seems to have enthused one orky [[drawfag]] to the highest of possible levels, make of that what you will.
** '''Conker's Bad Fur Day'''
** '''[[Metal Gear]]'''
** '''Dungeons and Dragons Order of the Griffon''', a game for the PC Engine/TurboGrafx 16 set in the Grand Duchy of Karameikos. Uses Basic D&D rules versus the Gold Box games' AD&D rules.
** '''[[Samus|Metroid]]''', '''[[The Legend of Zelda]]''', '''Kid Icarus''', and '''[[Castlevania]]''' (the four games series share so much in common they deserve to be discussed together). Why? The exploration-heavy nature of the games, the feeling of growing more powerful as you collect enough gear and relics to make an adventuring party jealous, the incredibly memorable boss battles, interesting backstories (Metroid immerses you in backstory at your pace, via scans and lore pickups, leaving much up to your imagination), and providing many ideas for scifi or fantasy RPG session.

==Games that can be used to troll /tg/==
* Most other MMORPGs. [[World of Warcraft]], as the most successful to date, is especially effective. Special points to [[Star Wars: The Old Republic]] for being a massive disappointment for a popular franchise.
* JRPGs, for often recycling the same plots over and over and having identical structure. Along with of course cringy bad character designs in some cases.
* Any of the modern Final Fantasy games, [[Games Workshop|which somehow keep getting sequels despite being financial failures]]. [[This Guy|Some fa/tg/uys]] have a fondness for the early ones, mostly because [[Troll|the first one rips off D&D pretty squarely]].
* [[Skyrim]], a popular well liked meme game that /v/ contrarians and neckbeards with nostalgia goggles will say is shit. Same goes for [[The Elder Scrolls IV: Oblivion|Oblivion]], [[Fallout]] 3 and 4, and any future Bethesda RPGs.
* <s>Mentioning the attention Warhammer 40k games have gotten compared to Warhammer Fantasy is a sore spot for Fantasy fans.</s> With the failure that is [[Dawn of War III]] and recent success of [[Total War: WARHAMMER]] and [[Vermintide]], you could say the tables have turned. Actually DoW3 by itself is enough for trolling anyway.
* Sonic The Hedgehog. The fans are everywhere, and the butthurt is unfathomable.
* Nintendo games have ultra-dedicated fanbases, and also hardcore haters, except for series like Metroid, Zelda, Mother, or Kid Icarus which are generally respected. Mentioning Pokemon in a positive light or stating the controller of "the best" console they released is a sex toy may cause an internet fight.
* Games with bad random number generators. Even highly approved of games like Mordheim: City Of The Damned will cause a shitstorm when someone is reminded that a supposed 95% chance to hit can result in four consecutive misses.
* No Man's Sky - such a huge waste of potential, although it got somewhat better with patches. Bringing this game up is a good troll move on /v/ as well, but everything's a good troll move on /v/.
* [[Blizzard]]. JUST. [[Blizzard]]. (''ACTIVISION'' Blizzard now, fuckers! The shit train only goes downhill from here!)

Games that are universally loathed, so you'll probably have to put in some work if you want to troll with:
* Unlike the previous Bethesda RPGs Fallout 76 is actually bad. So if you want to troll people you'll have to pretend to like it. Although, it's so objectively terrible your bait will most likely seem too obvious.
* [[Bioware | Anthem]].
** Almost all "Games as a Service" games released in the wake of Destiny have a similar, if lesser, level of disdain; it's just that Fallout 76 and Anthem were so garbage on release, and had such a CRPG pedigree, that the trolling mines were quickly completely depleted.
* Reminding [[Shadowrun]] fans of the terrible Shadowrun FPS is not going to earn you any goodwill.
* [[Evony]]

==The Game List That People Copypasta==
Every so often, someone posts on /tg/: "Wow, you guys are so smart and cool; can you recommend some [[video games]] to play for those hours when I'm not playing tabletop?". It happens so often that people have made [[copypasta]] for the occasion, even image copypasta.

You will find a lot of those games on [http://www.gog.com/ Good Old Games], DRM free, for 6 or 9 bucks. Or [[Freebooterz|for free if you pirate]], which can often be justified by the original creators leaving the development company so all the [[Profit]] goes to people who don't deserve it. Your choice.

For any video game that someone felt was good enough for a full page on this wiki, see [[:Category:Video_Games|Video Games]]

<center>[[Image:TG_recommended_games1.jpg]]</center>

<center>[[Image:Recommended_vg_2.jpg|900px]]</center>

[[Category:Video Games]]
[[Category:Software]]
[[Category:Approved Media]]

Critical Role

2020-09-01T12:44:18Z

2A02:1811:5180:A200:EC3D:29FD:FA1D:618: /* Why Does /tg/ Hate Critical Role? */

{{dnd-stub}}

'''Critical Role''' is a web-video series that airs on a weekly basis, and is based on the streaming of a game of [[Dungeons & Dragons]] played by a group of famous voice actors, most notably Matthew Mercer as the [[Dungeon Master]]. It has been held up as being a huge part of the reason why [[Dungeons & Dragons 5th Edition]] was such a commercial success, as this publicity gave D&D a huge public image makeover, allowing it to be officially perceived as "cool", and not the province of emotionally stunted, socially inept, hideously deformed basement-dwelling nerds. /tg/ has never forgiven them for it.

==The Setting==
The players of Critical Role use Mercer's own homebrewed world, called [[Exandria]]; the first campaign (series) takes place on a continent called Tal'dorei, whilst the second takes place on another one called Wildemount. The second campaign is set 20 years after the events of the first.
The first campaign is mostly an archetypal fantasy adventure having a lot of noblebright elements (the "Briarwoods arc" being a notable exception). The second campaign set in the Dwendalian Empire, is much more Grimdark, the Empire itself sharing many similarities with /tg/'s favorie religious intolerant and all-around fascist empire.

==Vox Machina==
The Cast of Characters in Season 1. (2015-2017)

'''Grog Strongjaw'''

"''Right, listen up. If you have ale, then you have a friend in Grog Strongjaw. A goliath of towering height and size, this barbarian has an appetite for the two great loves in his life: combat, women, and ale. Wait... Easily the brains of the group, Grog is often consulted for his vast knowledge of shapes, colors, and shiny things. Also ale. In his early years, armed with his two-handed greataxe, Grog often enjoyed proving his might amongst the ranks of his family's wandering herd. But after coming upon an unsuspecting elderly gnome in the woods, he objected to the killing of such an innocent life. A creature of impulse, Grog felt only pity for this terrified little thing. His disobedience cost him dearly. Beaten bloody and banished by the herd leader, his uncle Kevdak, Grog was abandoned and left to die. Exiled from his herd, it was then that the relative of the very gnome he fought to save, saved him. It was the kindness of a gnome cleric named Pike that healed Grog, bringing him back from death's edge. And they have remained close friends ever since. Most nights, Grog can be found challenging entire taverns to wrestling matches! Or accompanying Scanlan to the nearest house where you pay for, er, lady favors. Also ale.''"
-Grog's introduction

"''I would like to Rage!''"
-Grog whenever he gets the chance

Goliath barbarian and resident meat shield Grog isn't exactly the sharpest half-giant in the crayon box but he makes up for his lacking mental capacity with his ungodly strength and winning personality. Grog is good at three things: Killing things very violently, drinking profusely and finding horrible evil swords by accident. Grog has earned many titles over his long years of adventuring most of them due to complete accident or where given as a joke this however makes them no less hilarious they include but are not limited to: The Grand Poobah de Doink of All This and That, First Tour Captain of Whitestone, King-Maker, Dragon-slayer, Professor Grog, Jumbo, Greg, Philip, Peanutbutter. This list of illustrious names only scratches the surface of the legend that Grog has accumulated over his time adventuring with Vox Mochina. He may be dumb as hell and will straight up murder some one if provoked but he does try to do what's right whenever the chance arises. Basically the most popular character in Vox Machina in part thanks to Travis Willingham and his insane commitment to roleplaying the character.

'''Keyleth'''

"''A first impression of Keyleth would leave you with little information on the half-elven druid. You might even think that her social awkwardness due to her sheltered upbringing is kind of sweet. Of course, it would be unwise to underestimate her based on first impressions. Under that unintimidating petite frame is a vicious beast waiting to be unleashed, whose natural powers have made even the fiercest of champions pee their pants. Literally. Born to the air tribe of the Ashari people, Keyleth was raised with a deep love of nature and the elemental magics. It is her people's inherent duty to protect the delicate areas in Tal'Dorei, where the four elemental planes begin to bleed with this realm. Since she was a little girl, she had quite a knack for air manipulation and beast shaping abilities; well, if you consider kittens and flying squirrels to be little beasts, which I do. Anyways, it wasn't long before the headmaster of the tribe, her father, Korrin, realized her true prodigious abilities and she was inveterated to succeed him as the next headmaster. Just like that, her jovial childhood was stripped and replaced with endless spell memorization, teachings from ancient traditions, and exceedingly high expectations. Every druid leader-to-be must embark on a journey to seek out the sister tribes in order to introduce and establish respect amongst the fellow headmasters. They call this the Aramenté, or Noble Odyssey. When her father felt she was ready, he set her on the path to truly discovering herself. Not knowing when, or if, she will ever return. As she hikes down the mountain towards Stilben, she meditated on the task ahead. Part of the Aramenté is proving yourself a strong warrior, a valiant protector, and a wise and compassionate leader. With this knowledge, one thought plays in repeat in her mind: is she even worthy?''"
-Keyleth's Introduction

'''Vax'ildan'''

"''Never entirely welcome in the company of elves or men, Vax'ildan learned at a young age to skip past formality, preferring instead to invite himself in your door. Along with twin sister Vex'ahlia, Vax was born by a chance encounter between elven royalty and human peasantry. Raised by their mother in their early years, the twins were eventually sent off to their father in the elven capital of Syngorn. But their cool reception among the elves there never warmed, and their time in the capital didn't last. The siblings stole away one autumn night and set out on the open road. After a few years of wandering, they eventually decided to return to their mother, and journeyed back to the lands of their youth. But instead of finding their childhood home, they returned to a pile of rubble. Their mother was gone, their home burned to ash. Pressing the townspeople for answers, they learned of the day the dragon came. With their ties all severed, Vax'ildan and his sister set out to find their fortune together in Tal'Dorei. An outsider since birth, Vax quickly learned to solve life's challenges in his own particular way, often by sidestepping them entirely. And when his knack for circumventing adversity isn't enough, the way of blades the elves schooled him in more than makes up the difference.''"
-Vax's Introduction

'''Vex'Ahlia'''

"''Like so many half-elves, Vex'ahlia has spent most of her life suffering the cool reception of a people who don't fully accept her. Born of a human mother and an elven father—who only later in life took an interest in their existence—, Vex'ahlia and her twin brother Vax'ildan quickly realized the only people they could truly rely on in this world were each other. It was at the age of ten when the two were taken from their mother, and brought to live in Syngorn, the isolated elven city for which their father was an ambassador. He quietly took them in, but always kept an icy distance, and after too many years of disdainful looks, the pair decided to leave his indifference behind, and set out on their own. Vax took to the cities, stealing small trinkets and learning the ways of the thief, while Vex kept to the woods. She preferred the isolation. Always the keen observer, she learned to hunt and to track, to spy and to shoot. And through a series of fateful events, earned herself a companion in the form of a bear—her own stolen Trinket—to fight alongside her and protect her fiercely. Also, he is adorable—and gives expert massages.''"
-Vex's Introduction

Half-Elf Ranger, has a pet bear named Trinket who due to the nature of animal companions in Fifth Edition became more and more useless as the campaign progressed. She's also the group's accountant and keeps track of their finance. Vex is in general a bit of an odd character as even though Laura Bailey role-played consistently and is generally well-liked by the fandom she doesn't get any major arcs or character progression along the campaign besides her relationship to Percival, making her well-liked but no one's favorite

'''Percival Fredrickstein Von Musel Klossowski de Rolo III'''

"''Percy was the third child of seven children, born to a noble family who lived far to the north in the ancient castle of Whitestone. With so many siblings to share the burdens of lordship, Percy turned his attention to the sciences, engineering, and naturalism. One day, a mysterious couple, named Lord and Lady Briarwood, came to court. During a feast held in their honour, the Briarwoods violently took control of the castle, killing or imprisoning everyone who would stand in their way. Percy awoke chained in the dungeon, only to be freed by his younger sister. Together they fled, chased by the Briarwoods' men. As they ran, Percy's sister took several arrows to the chest and fell. Percy kept running, eventually jumping into a freezing river and floating unconscious to freedom. He did not remember waking up on a fishing boat. He barely remembered the next two years, as he slowly made his way as far south as possible. Then one night, Percy had a dream. A roaring cloud of smoke offered him vengeance against those who destroyed his family. When he awoke, Percy began to design his first gun.''"
-Percival's Introduction

A human Gunslinger (a custom archetype made by Matt available on the DMs Guild), Percy quickly came into his own as a character and enraptured the community due to a haunting backstory and performance from Taliesin Jaffe. Percy unintentionally opens Pandora's Box through the creation of firearms, yet another bundle of trauma to add onto losing all of his family at a young age and being forced to flee as they were slaughtered before his eyes. Eventually finding a replacement family in Vox Machina, Percy set out to avenge his loved ones and provide his new family with a safe home in Whitestone after reclaiming it from a horde of vampires and undead.

'''Scanlan Shorthalt'''

"''Oh, you haven't heard of Scanlan Shorthalt? Well, gird your loins, ladies, because he has his eye on you. A talented musician, master of disguise, and dashingly handsome in his own mind, Scanlan sings songs almost as much as he sings his own praises. Born a poor gnome, Scanlan used his endless charm and soaring tenor voice to croon for coin and support his single mother. One day he was discovered by a half-orc promoter, and joined Dr. Dranzel's Spectacular Traveling Troupe, where he learned the ways of the world, and honed his skills as a bard extraordinaire. A loner much of his life, Scanlan has never quite come to terms with the violent death of his mother at the hands of a goblin invasion. While his years on the road provided many, shall we say, educational experiences with the opposite sex, deep down Scanlan yearns for the one thing he's never known: the true love of a fellow gnome. Still, Scanlan considers himself a lover first, performer second, and fighter distant third. On the battlefield, he'll support his allies, but rarely draws blood unless it's to protect fellow gnome Pike. Count on Scanlan for a hearty laugh, a rollicking song, and a twinkle in his eye that melts hearts and makes the females swoon.''"
-Scanlan's Intro

The classic bardic archetype, Scanlan started life as a question by his actor Sam Riegel to Liam O'Brien on their podcast All Work No Play asking what was the worst possible class/race hybrid he could play, to which O'Brien answered with "Gnome Bard." As fond of the ladies as he was fond of praising himself, Scanlan served mostly as a support caster, making the most of his Bardic abilities to flicker between DPS, healing and buffing as needed. Pretty much universally adored, especially once Sam began to make Scanlan the most unintended badass character in the team with feats such as burning a mansion down during a running battle that started with him bursting the doors down as a dinosaur. As he matured and learned to let go of the lecherous lifestyle, helped by a surprise appearance from his unknown daughter, Scanlan became an invaluable member of the team who provided a cruical part in many of the larger battles.

'''Pike Trickfoot'''

"''Pike grew up in the outskirts of town, near the Bramblewood. Her ancestors were a family of deep gnomes with quite an unfavorable reputation. Thievery, destruction, and trickery left them with the curse of the last name of Trickfoot. Sarenrae, the goddess of healing and redemption, had other plans for Pike's great-great-grandfather Wilhand, who left his family at a young age after a dream—a dream that changed the course of the Trickfoot family. Wilhand devoted his life to Sarenrae, and pledged from then on that he and his family would live a life of service and devotion. As a child, Pike seemed to have an affinity to heal. Whether it was animals, people, or even flowers, she felt she had a purpose in making things whole that had once been broken. She studied and learned the ways to heal through divine magic. She lived a peaceful life, quiet and simple, until one day, Wilhand was captured and almost killed by a group of goliath barbarians. One of the goliaths took a stand against the murder of the innocent gnome, and he himself was beaten, bloodied, and left for dead, abandoned by his herd. Wilhand went to Pike for help. She prayed, and healed this barbarian as best she could, bringing him back to life. When he awoke, she discovered his name was Grog Strongjaw. After that, they were the best of friends—a rather unlikely pair. Little did she know that in a few years time, Grog would soon return the favor and bring her back from the clutches of death. After being killed in battle, Pike felt angry. She wanted to be stronger, so that it would never happen again. She spent four months at sea, training with the men and women aboard a ship called The Broken Howl. Gripping her holy symbol in one hand, and her morningstar in the other, this time, Pike is ready.''"
-Pike's Introduction

A Gnome Cleric, Pike was the party's main healer and source of moral support. Due to her actor Ashley Johnson spending much of the campaign living in New York filming for NBC's Blindspot, Pike had very infrequent appearances relying on Ashley being able to Skype in if she got off work early enough or coming to LA for several weeks- various times her character sheet would be given to another cast member for more important battles. This had the unintended consequence of giving Pike little chance to grow as a character due to many of her arcs being cut off by Ashley having to leave or being heavily truncated. While mostly liked by the fandom, no one's exactly going to call Pike their favorite.

Ashley's boyfriend, later husband, Brian Wayne Foster, also hosts a spinoff show called Talks Machina where a rotating cast made of the players are asked followup questions about each session.

'''Tiberius Stormwind'''

"''Greetings and salutations. I am Tiberius Stormwind. I hail from a town called Tyriex, located in the heart of Draconia, born from a politically respected family. At the age of 15, I succeeded in passing the Sorcerer's Rite, showing prodigy-like control of my magic. The judges and the Draconian high council were amazed at how powerful my spells were for how long I had been training. At 20 years old, I was the youngest appointed member of the magic guild in Draconian history. For the next few years, I almost went mad from the malaise of being a guild member, as it's rather boring. However, one day I happened upon a chamber, unused for quite some time. In the room were stacks of books and maps of the surrounding cities and areas around the known world. For months I would frequent the chamber, and learned of artifacts from legend. After a long period of research, I made a list of artifacts that caught my eye. I brought these findings to the high council and was told that all of the information in the chamber I stumbled upon was either believed to be fiction or unsolvable mysteries, and hence were lost forever. I found those answers to be unacceptable. A year later I devised a ruse and managed to convince the city council to lend support in me leaving Draconia on a mission of peace and diplomacy for the surrounding kingdoms, going from town to town and making friends and allies, in and for the name of Draconia. Being a red dragonborn, I had quite the task on my hands in that respect, but it was exactly what I needed so I could explore the world and find these artifacts, as I felt the truth was out there. Some may describe me as buffoonish, but I say poppycock to all that. I am much sharper than most give me credit for. I just don't pay attention to things sometimes. I've also been known to be rather cunning, loyal, happy-go-lucky, and well, dangerous. I can't help but show my true scales every now and then. But overall, I think I'm quite friendly for a dragonborn.''"
-Tiberius' Introduction

More known for the controversies his actor got into, Tiberius was a Dragonborn Sorcerer driven to uncover magical mysteries and recover lost artifacts. Proving popular in the early days of the show, Tiberius's popularity would wane after the first major arc due to accusations that his actor Orion Acaba was cheating at the table through fudging dice rolls and deliberately misreading his magic items to give him an advantage over the DM. Acaba's bad habit of getting into spats with the fandom such as telling a fan they were "no true fan" of Critical Role when they made a Tiberius shirt, soured a lot of people to the character as a consequence. When Orion abruptly left the show in 2015 the fanbase devolved into massive arguments about it and conspiracies began to emerge about the true reasoning for his firing. Orion himself has given differing accounts, citing a mixture of a HIV diagnosis alongside a bad breakup making him unpleasant at the table and souring his professional relationships. Various new debacles involving him pocketing charity money meant for one of his Twitch mods and various ex-girlfriends calling him abusive have made even the mere topic of Tiberius persona non grata for many fans. Ultimately, Matt (with Orion's permission) had Tiberius killed offscreen by member of the villainous Chroma Conclave when they attacked Draconia.

'''Taryon Darington'''
“''I am literally the least hard man to find: I tell everyone my name, I wear a gold helmet, and I walk around talking about myself.''”
-Taryon to his father

Sam Riegel's replacement character during a period where Scanlan left the show, Taryon was an Artificer (gen 2) described as a low level character wearing a high-level player's gear. Aided by his companion Doty, Taryon inserted himself into Vox Machina's story and became fast friends with the group after the token tragic backstory exchange. Left the party after Scanlan returned and took a more recurring role for the rest of the series.

==The Mighty Nein==
The Cast of Characters in Season 2. (2018-Present)

'''Beauregard "Beau" Lionett'''

Socially awkward, possibly autistic, lesbian [[human]] [[monk]]. Surly and cynical, a self-professed jerkass. Turns out to have been running from successful wine merchant parents who were so outraged by her bootlegging their wine that they had her kidnapped by a monastic order, the Cobalt Soul, with the instructions to literally "beat the indiscretions out of her".

'''Caduceus Clay'''

Serene male [[Firbolg]] [[cleric]]. The team's chef, ambiguously bisexual, and soundly loathed by much of /tg/ for cementing the "Firbolgs are hornless [[minotaur]]s" meme started by the campaign with his official art. Played by Molly's actor after his previous character's unfortunate demise.

'''Caleb Widogast'''

A worldweary, mentally scarred vagabond [[human]] [[wizard]] ([[Transmuter]]) with large crystals inserted into his forearms. Was trained/brainwashed into becoming a mage-assassin and given the final task of killing his parents for subversion. Turns out he was compelled magically to do so and subsequently went mad from revelation. He was committed to an insane asylum for over a decade before getting his faculties back and breaking out, meeting up with Nott along the way.

'''Fjord'''

Male [[half-orc]] sailor turned [[warlock]], ultimately multiclassing to [[paladin]]. Suffers from an inferiority complex due to being raised among human society, and imitates his former captain down to the accent for a large portion of the series. Once he loses his warlock powers derived from an eldritch horror, he comes clean and converts to a nature deity to regain his former abilities and multiclass.

'''Jester Lavorre'''

Spunky, playful, mischievous female [[tiefling]] [[cleric]] of the local god of trickery and chaos. Has blue skin instead of red and an affinity for frost instead of fire, which might be because she's actually half tiefling and half (water) [[genasi]]. Daughter of a courtesan and raised exclusively indoors, she has major issues dealing with reality but keeps an upbeat attitude possibly out of necessity. Her dad is a crime boss known as The Gentleman, which the fans predicted might be the case almost as soon as he was introduced but wasn't revealed until dozens of sessions later. Generally the most beloved character, balancing a chaotic and impulsive nature with almost childlike innocence and a thick eastern accent. Also the most lewded probably do to the fact that her mother is a prostitute and her fascination with harlequin novels.

'''Mollymauk "Molly" Tealeaf'''

Flamboyant purple-skinned male [[tiefling]] [[Blood Hunter]], introduced as a traveling circus performer and con-man. Waking up in a shallow grave with no memory of his past and with his neck completely covered in scars and adorned with various eye tattoos across his body. Molly is a literal and figurative peacock, wearing a colorful robe covered with religious symbols of nearly every deity and delighting in telling outrageous lies with no thought for who believes them. Despite his mischievous, carefree and sometimes downright hedonistic attitude, he still manages to be endearing and kindhearted when it matters. Molly grew to be an overall favorite amongst the fans and the party due to these traits, and for a time was ironically the party's moral center, balancing mischief and outrageous hijinks with a desire to not harm those who didn't deserve it. Brutally murdered in the 26th episode, and many a tear was shed. RIP.

'''Nott the Brave'''

A skittish, kleptomaniacal, booze-addicted female [[goblin]] [[rogue]] with an immense sense of racial self-hatred going on, Nott became a surprise hit on /tg/ due to her endearing personality and being a mainstream depiction of the "cute goblin" meme, with some hints from her players that she's even a canonical [[shortstack]]. Then it was revealed that Nott is actually a female [[halfling]] called Veth, who was cursed into the form of a goblin by a vengeful goblin shaman for killing said shaman's husband. She ultimately broke the curse and returned to her original form. Ironically, /tg/ generally considers it a ''downgrade'' in terms of attractiveness.

'''Yasha Nydoorin'''

Goth-styled female lesbian fallen [[aasimar]] barbarian with a tragic past involving her lover from another tribe being murdered when they tried to run away together. Has apparently become the Chosen One for the setting's [[Tharizdun]], which is ominous.

==Why Does /tg/ Hate Critical Role?==

That's a tough question. And probably the most honest answer is that /tg/ doesn't hate Critical Role per se, instead what they really hate is all the amazing talent in the show that isn't getting used at all. Critical Role has 2 seasons, the first is widely considered by /tg/ to be really good. Especially the earlier episodes which had a much lighter tone and seemed to truly be a home game brought on to the internet. However the 2nd is much more condemned. Campaign 1 is 115 episodes, with multiple arcs, boss battles, and two truly great "Save the World" quests. Campaign 2 has, well, a lot of filler, and is already in the early 100s. The cast decided to be more Chaotic Neutral then the last campaign and that has lead to a mostly aimless plot where the Mighty Nein try to avoid getting entangled in current affairs. So now we have the CR quality, with a murderhobo level party.

Another frequently levelled criticism ([[skub|rightly or wrongly]]) is that what is shown on screen in the series is a poor representation of an average p&p RPG session. Yet the series being popular and often the first introduction to non-vidja RPG's for potential new players, the show creates a lot of expectations that arent held up by the reality of the hobby... to the immense frustration of both the newcomers who expected something else, and the oldtimers becoming fed up of being unjustly compared to Matt Mercer.

==The Crunch==
Critical Role began as a [[Pathfinder]] game, and then moved to [[Dungeons & Dragons 5th Edition]] with some homebrewed mechanics, most notably the existence of a [[Gunslinger]] class.

Mercer may also be familiar with [[Dungeons & Dragons 4th Edition]], as certain influences from the [[Nentir Vale]] can be seen on Tal'dorei - most notably, the Tal'dorei pantheon is literally the [[Dawn War]] pantheon, but given new names.

In 2017, Mercer officially released a Tal'dorei campaign setting [[splatbook]] for 5th edition. He has also brought up the idea of doing other splatbooks for different parts of Exandria. 2020 saw this become fully official, as ''Explorer's Guide to Wildemount'' was confirmed to be published and released by Wizards in March of that same year.

==Gallery==
<gallery>
Nott's Two Faces.jpg|Nott on the left, Veth on the right.
Mollymauk.jpg|Molly, the Magnificent Bastard Himself. RIP
Yasha.jpg|Yasha, in her human form.
Beauregard.jpg|Beau, the disaster lesbian.
Fjord.jpg|Fjord. Not pictured: Crippling lack of self-worth.
Caleb.jpg|Caleb, the party's resident paranoid schizophrenic.
Jester.jpg|Jester, probably the most popular character of the Nein.
Caduceus.jpg|Caduceus. [[Meme|He's just happy to be here.]]
Nott.jpg|Nott, in the early episodes of the campaign.
Veth.jpg|Veth, Nott's original form.
</gallery>

[[Category:Approved Media]][[Category: Dungeons & Dragons]]

Alexis Polux

2020-09-01T10:16:05Z

2A02:1811:5180:A200:EC3D:29FD:FA1D:618: /* Early Life */

[[File:Polux.jpg|500px|thumb|right|The finest example of an Astartes who ever lived.]]
'''Alexis Polux''', also known as [[Awesome|'''David Duchovny in space''']] was the Captain of the [[Imperial Fists|Imperial Fist]] 405th Company, master of the Retribution Fleet at Phall during the [[Horus Heresy]] and the first Chapter Master of a - no, [[Crimson Fists|THE very manly and very much most Spanishest of chapters, ]] after the subsequent fracturing of the legions. A giant of a man, even for a Space Marine, he was known for his cold and extremely logical mind and demeanor. Unlike a lot of the famous marines from the heresy (especially among the Fists), he was never found wanting for glory or recognition. He simply did his job to the T and [[/tg/ gets shit done|got some serious shit done]] throughout the Crusade, the Heresy and the Aftermath. Never once failing in his duty to the Imperium. Making him the living embodiment of everything his [[Rogal Dorn|Primarch]] stood for.

In a galaxy full of some [[Astelan|truly]] [[Eidolon|and]] [[Perturabo|utterly]] [[Abaddon|incompetent]] commanders, he was one that could be relied upon to get the job done.

==History==
=== Early Life ===
Alexis was born on the Planet Inwit, the same icy hellhole that Rogal Dorn wound up on. Both he and his brother Helias were selected as potential candidates to become Space Marines, and were sent off into the wasteland with the other recruits to complete the trials. After saving Alexis from some kind of monster, Helias was left dangling off the edge of a cliff, holding onto a very badly wounded Alexis for dear life. Alexis, due to not being Bruce Wayne, couldn't pull him back up, but flat out refused to let his brother go. Deciding having the both of them die was not the smartest move, Helias released his grip and fell to his death. Alexis survived the trials and was made a fully fledged Space Marine. The events of the trails dramatically changed his outlook forever, believing that Helias, the stronger of the two, should have been the one to survive.
Despite proving to be an excellent Astartes and quickly reaching the rank of Captain, he always worked thinking he was never as strong or as qualified for leadership as his fellow Commanders (in particular [[Sigismund]]).

This perspective would shape his career with a humility that made him an excellent strategist and leader of his fellow Battle-Brothers. At some point in the Crusade, he came to the attention of Yonnad, one of the Legion's senior captains and its undisputed master of void warfare. He adopted Polux as his protege.

=== Horus Heresy ===
After the then Death Guard captain Nathaniel Garro told Dorn of Horus's swanky new Treachery party (and Dorn subsequently tried to rip Garro a new anus with his super-Chainsword), Dorn dispatched a fleet under the command of Sigismund to the Isstvan system to get the leftover Heresy cake. Sigismund then decided to remain behind on Terra, so command fell to Polux's mentor Yonnad. Yonnad then pulled a Frederick Barbarossa and died rather anti-climatically on the way, so command fell to Polux. Despite initial reluctance, he took up the mantle none-the-less and got to work. The event in question that killed Yonnad, was a very sudden and inexplicable surge of Warp Storms that had pinned the fleet in place. Polux chose to wait them out, ignoring his officers advising to brute-force their way out, suspecting that something about this seemed all too convenient and there was likely to be some kind of [[trap]] on the other end. Polux instead drilled the ever-loving shit out of his men in boarding actions while he waited, in an all or nothing gamble to curbstomp the awaiting forces in space before they could react.

=== Battle at the Phall System ===
Despite a lot of doubt from his underlings, the plan worked incredibly well and resulted in the EPIC [[Battle of Phall]]. The Iron Warriors, expecting the Fists to be under [[Sigismund]]'s command and to do the predictable thing of landing and fortifying their position, were completely unprepared for what came out the other end. Polux was ready for them and what should have been a roflstomp turned out to be anything but. Heavy casualties were inflicted on both sides, but once the initial assault was over, the Fists had absolutely gained the upper hand despite the Iron Warriors' numerical advantage.

During the battle, Captain Amandus Tyr informed Polux that the Iron Warriors' flagship was amongst the enemy fleet. Polux then thought 'What would [[Horus]] do?' and ordered Tyr to send a Strike Force right into the heart of the enemy, board the Iron Blood, and shoot [[Perturabo]] into oblivion (a fitting end). They came unbelievably close to killing Perty (in his own bedroom no less) but ultimately a Primarch is a Primarch and a royally pissed-off Pert repainted the walls of his chambers with Imperial Fist [[rip and tear|blood (and brains, and viscera, and armor parts...)]] This did cause Perty's paranoia to skyrocket which lead to a lot of problems for the Iron Warriors, so there is that at least.

Victory was almost at hand for the Fists, but then Dorn sent a Grindr message ordering everyone left back to Terra to help prepare for the [[Siege of Terra|final battle]]. Understanding that they had done what they needed to do, Polux pulled out and headed home, leaving the Iron Warriors with a hollow victory, a raging lunatic for a leader and not enough resources to make much more of a real impact for the remainder of the Heresy until the very end at the battle for Terra [[Perturabo#Iron Cage|and after Horus' death]].

Sadly enough, the signal the [[Navigator]]s picked up as the Fists retreated wasn't the Astronomican but the Pharos instead. Polux and his pals ended up in [[Ultramar]] where [[Roboute Guilliman|Granddaddy Smurf]] was [[Imperium Secundus|doin' some shady shit, yo!]] Polux didn't take it meekly and called Guilliman out on it but he was in the end too loyal an Imperial to go against a [[Primarch]] and he dropped the subject, especially when both [[Lion El'Johnson]] and [[Sanguinius]] seemed to be a-okay with Guilliman's [[heresy|practical solution]]. Polux stayed well-clear of the political bullshit, limiting himself to offer a couple of pointers about fortifications.

=== Battle of Sotha ===
Due to some Warp/Pharos-related shenanigans, Polux eventually ended up on the planet Sotha, where he proceeded to [[awesome|assist Warsmith Barabas Dantioch and his still-loyal Iron Warriors to lay down a beating on the Night Lords.]] What's that? Hating the Iron Warriors just because they were Iron Warriors? None of that. Both Polux and [[Barabas Dantioch]] were gifted with the rarest thing in 40K, namely common sense, and they worked together just fine, even becoming friends despite their Primarchs' hate of one another.

=== The Crimson Fists ===
After the Siege of Terra, [[Roboute Guilliman]] ordered all the Legions to break up into Chapters. Polux was given command of the newly founded [[Crimson Fists]], comprised of the more 'level headed' Marines of the Legion. While the more zealous [[Black Templars]] went off to spank the crying traitors all the way back to the Eye of Terror. Polux and his chapter were sent off to combat a Kabal of Dark Eldar, which would set the trend of the Crimson Fists being VERY good at killing Xenos.

800 years after the heresy (making him fucking old for a Space Marine) Polux met his end at the hands of a poison from a massed Scythian attack. But Polux wasn't one to die without getting the job done. With his final words, he gave to his successor instructions on how to eliminate the threat of the Scythians once and for all. With his last breath, Polux ensured the reduction of a formidable race of Xenos from an extremely dangerous enemy of the Imperium to an obscure and fractured band of Dark Eldar knockoffs.

==On The Tabletop==
[[File:Poluxmini.jpg|250px|thumb|right|Epic character. Epic rules. Epic Model. It's good to be loyal.]]
Polux was introduced to the Tabletop in Extermination, and [[Forge World]] did a bang up job of representing him. With his rules matching his [[fluff]] perfectly and also being a very [[Crunch|crunchy]] choice for any Imperial Fist army to boot!

He's a void-hardened power-armoured Praetor with -1 BS/A ''(BS5 with legion tactics though and his attacks stat is redundant - see below)'', but with ''S5'', a master-crafted Power Fist with a [[Pedro_Kantor|gauntlet mounted]] Combi-melta and a ''Vigil'' pattern Storm Shield for 3++. You'd normally need Terminator armor for that, but he's that strong. Also, as a master of void combat he lets you teleport in an Imperial Fist infantry unit of your choice via Deep strike and he allows his unit to pass/fail morale or pinning checks at his leisure. Lastly, if he is the warlord he can redeploy one unit in his army before the turn order is determined, with the option to even put it in or out of reserves.
A nifty special rule he has lets you drop the Unwieldy rule from his [[Fist of the North Star|mighty fist]] in exchange for dropping his attacks stat down to 1, but you still get 2 attacks on the charge! Who needs a Paragon Blade? Go around knocking characters out in one shot with his master-crafted fist, which rerolls to hit in challenges!

==Naming==
Castor and Pollux, the Dioscuri twins (aka the Gemini) were twins born from Zeus fooling around with some married mortal woman (as usual), [[Furry|disguised as a swan]], no less. In several versions of the myth, only Pollux had divine blood, and thus was immortal, while Castor wasn't. Castor promptly dies (not unlike Helias here), and Pollux asks to the gods to share his immortality with his brother, so they turn them into the Gemini constellation. Pollux from 30k managed to turn into a full-fledged marine, even a chapter master (of a [[Crimson Fists|manly spanish chapter]]), so you could say he achieved immortality, while his brother didn't.

{{Marines-Characters}}

[[Category:Space Marines Chapter Masters]]

Tank

2020-09-01T10:02:08Z

2A02:1811:5180:A200:EC3D:29FD:FA1D:618: /* Common Features of the Tank */

{{Topquote|'' Remember Comrades, we are tank!''
<br>''They take out treads, we are artillery!''
<br>''They take out main gun, we are pillbox!''
<br>''They take out machine gun, we are bunker!''
<br>''They take out armor, we are heroes!''
|A popular internet copypasta about a tank's various roles in a nutshell}}

''Were you looking for the MMO role that gets applied to tabletop games? If so, we have that under [[Combat roles]]''

[[image:Char_FT-17.jpg|thumb|300px|right|A French Renault FT-17 Tank, the first tank to have the rough layout that would be the norm for tanks (Crew in the front, top mounted 360 degree turret for main gun, engine in back)]]

A '''tank''' is a tracked, armored combat vehicle. The term is often limited to vehicles intended for direct combat, (e.g. as opposed to self-propelled artillery, which stay to the rear) or armored personnel carriers and infantry fighting vehicles, which are on the front line but are primarily tasked with carrying soldiers as opposed to fighting directly, and may not necessarily be tracked. Their invention revolutionized warfare in the 20th century, and any wargame set in or after that time period, or in alternate universes with similar or more advanced technology levels, will have plenty of attention devoted to them -- or to whatever made them obsolete (e.g. [[BattleTech]]).

The idea of an armored fighting vehicle dates back at least to [[wikipedia:Leonardo's fighting vehicle|Leonardo da Vinci]] and was explored by [[H. G. Wells]] and a few theorists, but the modern tank was proposed shortly before World War I, and was then spurred to production by the war itself. When the war on the Western Front got bogged down in trenches, the British Royal Navy, who had already had some success with mobile armoured car groups, had the idea to use tracked, armored vehicles with guns to break the stalemate. The name "tank" became attached to the vehicle as a codename to disguise the purpose of the large metal bodies being built. After the first tanks rolled onto the battlefield, other countries called them "battle wagons", "armors", "assault vehicles", and other more descriptive names, but the Anglosphere was stuck with calling them "tanks". (Interestingly, the original British Tank, which looked like a tractor with a metal box on top of it was called "Little Willy".)

==Common Features of the Tank==

Tanks were built with pretty much any set of features you could imagine, but over time, the militaries of the world settled on several key features:

# A large-caliber primary cannon for destroying enemy vehicles and defenses. This is partially why the Navy was the first branch of the British military to design and produce tanks during WWI, but mostly because the early designs demonstrated for the British army were unimpressive at best while First Lord of the Admiralty Winston Churchill saw their potential. Tanks armed with missiles instead of a main gun have been tried, but they have yet to take off.
# A turret to house the tank gun, to allow the tank to shoot at targets without having to pivot the entire vehicle. The French had this one figured out by 1918, and some tanks developed during the interwar period actually had more than one (though this proved impractical). Strictly speaking this one is not essential as [[Wikipedia:Sturmgeschütz_III|the German Stug]] proves, and indeed the lack of a turret does have some advantages thanks to how it lowers the profile, but the advantages of a turret are strong enough to render the benefits offered moot. The only guys ever serious about turretless tanks after WWII were [[Wikipedia:Stridsvagn_103|the Swedes]] and the germans but at the turn of the century they too went for a conventional turreted design. A turret-less tank is only really useful if you don't have the money to make a turreted tank, or you don't have the technology to mount a gun as big as you want in the turret.
#*As the why the Swedes chose to have a turretless tank, they had learnt from the studies of casualty reports from World War II and the Korean War which revealed that the risk of being hit in combat was strongly related to height, with more than half of tank losses being the result of the turret being penetrated. They therefore concluded that any new design should be as low as possible. [[Cheese|The radical solution was to eliminate the turret, which would also dispose of a vulnerable target area and make the tank much lighter.]] Like all "strokes of brilliance", this had it's own set of ups and downs (literally, since the STRV103 had a hydraulic suspension designed to help stabilize and aim the main gun that would make any modern pimp wagon cry tears of envious rage). Were one to combine min-maxing and a tank, this would be the result.
#**An additional reason for this weird Swedish min-maxing was the political climate of the time. While Sweden was [[Rules_lawyer|official neutral]] during the Cold War, they felt the Soviets were more likely to be an enemy than the Americans, especially since the Swedes had ties with the Finns. Hence, the Swedes decided a turretless tank would be better for the terrain of Finland and northern Sweden, where any Soviet attack would be fought off, due to the dense forests that make low-profile casemate vehicles better at ambush attacks. This is also the reason why they dropped their turretless design after the break-up of the USSR.
#*The Germans meanwhile realized they would be first in line should the Cold War suddenly get hot and remembering how effective their StuGs were in WWII (especially defensively which was the most probable scenario), kept their Kanonenjagdpanzer 90 (basically the lovechild of a Jagdpanzer IV and a M47 Patton) until at least 1990. As long as it works, don't fix it!
# A sloped, heavily-armored front face to absorb attacks, including those from enemy tanks. The reliance on thick front armor led to the development of anti-tank weapons like missiles and mines specialized to attack more vulnerable rear, underside, and top armor. All that said, sometimes designers choose not to armor their tanks. If the thickest armor you can put on a tank is going to get penetrated anyway then your best bet is not to armor it at all and focus on speed to make sure you don't get hit to begin with. During the Cold War, the French made heavy use of this designs, especially during the period when new HEAT shells had made steel armour less useful, but newer and stronger composite armour hadn't been invented yet. Modern tanks are a compromise trying to strike the right balance of both mobility and protection.
# Tracks with a profile as low as possible while meeting all-terrain mobility needs. A stopped tank is a dead tank, and running the tracks over the top of the body is begging for a mobility kill, no matter how cool the [[Wikipedia:Mark I tank|British Mark I]] looked. (Though to be fair to the Mark I, it needed its high tracks to cross trenches, and since it came first, there weren't really any weapons that could specifically take advantage of its exposed tracks at the time.)
# '''A radio!''' It can not be overstated how important a radio became to tanks. In both the battle for France and the early Operation Barbarossa the German tanks were under gunned and under armored compared to their opponents but thanks to their radios, they were able to outmaneuver the enemy and take them apart. Radios also became important inside tanks because, well, tanks are '''[[Noise Marines|LOUD]]''', and it's the only way for the crew to talk to each other without going hoarse yelling at each other. And it's not a joke: before the advent of intercom the commander often had to kick the driver on the left or right shoulder to indicate the direction he wanted him to turn because even yelling wasn't working with the ruckus of the moving tank. Soviet tank crews actually communicated mostly in kicks until well into 1943 because early Soviet radios were shit tier and tended to break in the first minute of every goddamn engagement.

Basically, tanks boil down to three features: mobility, defense, and firepower. You can generally speaking pick two at the cost of the third. The heavier your guns and armour, the slower the tank will be, for instance, while a vehicle made for mobility has to sacrifice either protection or the size of its guns. [[Imperial Guard|Unless you're the Russians, who tend to pick all three while sacrificing crew comfort instead.]]

==Useful Accessories for Tanks==
Particularly true of modern tanks, while the above features are considered absolute essentials, most tanks will come with a number of additional features to improve survivability and combat effectiveness.

===Offense===
*Machine Guns - These are useful for dealing with infantry in situations where a cannon is overkill or can't be brought to bear quickly enough. Your options on where to mount the machineguns are on the hull, use sponsons on each side, make the machinegun coaxial with the cannon, or stick one on top of the turret next to the hatch. The latter two are preferred for modern tanks as they're the most practical; the Coaxial can easily be used by the gunner without having to change stations, and the top-mounted gun has the best visibility around the tank. Besides reducing complexity, the main reason for this is that sticking guns in your hull means cutting a hole in said hull, making it more vulnerable. This is less of an issue when you stick a gun on top of your tank, or else add one where a hole already exists (the one for the main cannon).
**To be fair to WW1 designers, sponsons were the best option for the tactics at the time. Placing a machine gun and/or cannon in a sponson means it can clear a trench as the tank crosses it. Obviously, as soon as trenches fell out of favour, so too did sponsons. Additionally, as an enemy tank will never be in said trench, [[Land Raider|mounting an anti-tank weapon in the sponson is utterly retarded.]]
*Ammunition types - While almost all cannon shells explode, the way they explode affects their performance against specific targets. For example: a High Explosive Anti Tank round uses the Munroe effect to punch holes in steel, but is near useless against ERA, and must score a near hit on infantry for any effect. Conversely, anti-infantry rounds send shrapnel flying everywhere upon detonation to wound clusters of infantry and damage light vehicles around the explosion, but because they do not carry a big-enough payload and the force of the explosion just scatters everywhere; they cannot reliably threaten heavy-armored tanks. Thus, a tank needs different types of ammunition to engage different targets efficiently, otherwise its just wasting ammunition. And while theoretically you could annihilate the gun barrel, coax, and everything around the mantlet if you hit it with a HE shell, this occurrence is rare due to tanks having the thing known as APFSDS, or Armor Piercing Discarding Sabot. And for an HE shell of this size, you need Self Propelled Guns. Usually, just hide and shoot the side. More advanced shells are being made with computerized fuses, that allow skilled gunners to do things like fire a barrage of airbust shells that explode at different times to cover a wider area.
*Auxiliary Launchers - Even though you already have a cannon, having one or two of these on hand can still give you a leg up for any lopsided tank battles you may encounter. While most battle tanks eschew guided missiles due to their main gun being enough, lighter tanks typically use wire-guided missiles or dumb-fire rockets to give them an extra anti-armor punch when needed. Additionally, lighter tanks benefit from guided AT missiles as it allows them to reliably threaten heavier tanks, which could shrug off the shots from their low-caliber main gun. The downside is that missiles are limited to Shape Charge explosives, which can only threaten certain kinds of armor and not others. Only cannons can reliably penetrate armor through pure kinetic force. Furthermore, tank shells take up less room than guided missiles, meaning tanks carry more ammo and require less space inside of the turret.
**The exception to this rule was the Matilda Hedgehog. The Aussies took a page from the Germans' "mad genius" book and mounted a [[awesome|7-rounds 178mm spigot mortar]] on the back of a Matilda II tank, the idea being to give their infantry support tanks some serious close-range firepower for those cases something needed to be softened before an assault. While it unfortunately never saw action, considering the Hedgehog launcher was designed originally to kill submarines (yes, they too mounted a naval weapon on a tank) it would have been easily capable of fucking over a tank or bunker, as tests showed. The idea died out after WW2 though, since it was simply more cost-effective to let tanks do their tanky things and bring in artillery/a SPG/a plane do the really heavy shifting where needed.
**Though a trend has risen where lighter vehicles have automatic grenade launchers rather than MGs on the pintle mounts which is as scary to enemy infantry as the phrase "automatic grenade launcher" implies.

===Defense===
*Smoke Launchers - The little pipes you see on the turrets and hull of the tank are smoke launchers, which fire a single salvo of smoke grenades upon activation, and can be used multiple times. You may find the idea of trying to [[Creed|hide a tank]] ridiculous, but a good tank commander will know how to use smoke to mask their movements in case they need to make a hasty retreat. However, they're also really, really good at fouling up enemy laser guidance systems in an emergency situation or simply confusing AT infantry trying to get a bead on them. They also can block infrared due to the presence of White Phosphorus, which burns very hot. White Phosphorous is nasty in general, and will just as easily ignite some poor bastards along with the building they are shooting from.

*Reactive Armor - Reactive armor are boxes with a metal plate and a small explosive charge behind them (although modern variants have non-explosive versions for the safety of the friendly infantry around the tank, known as NERA). When the RPG or ATGM hits the ERA, the blast disrupts the shaped charge jet, and either stops it, or greatly reduces it. A way to bypass this is tandem charge, which one mini RPG goes [[Blam|BLAM]], setting off ERA, and then the real charge hits. Heavy ERA can also disrupt APFSDS to an extent, but usually not by much.

*Slat Armor - Due to how shaped-charge rounds work, they need to detonate at the right distance of the armor to punch through it. Something as simple as a metal cage surrounding you can prevent the shaped charge from doing much damage by just making it go off early.

*Improvised Armor - Just like its name says; its tank crewmen trying to bulk up their tank using unconventional things. Depending on their luck and resourcefulness, these can take the form of salvaged armor plates from other tanks, or nothing more than materials they find in the field, like sandbags or wooden logs. The latter two were popular in WW2, among other things. Improvised armor can protect the crew from some light anti-armor weapons to some extent, but does not fare well against heavy launchers and tanks with large main guns. This is often handy for smaller less tough vehicles, like APCs. A bit of wire fencing, a few metal rods, and a bit of welding may well save your ass.

*Active Protection System - An APS is a device that shoots down incoming anti-armor projectiles using a weapon. It works by having an active radar detect incoming AT rounds at the tank and then, depending on the type, will then fuck up its homing or guidance, or shoot at it to destroy it mid-flight. A great way to avoid damage altogether, but it is limited by its ammunition capacity and that it starts becoming less effective when faced with multiple AT rounds coming it's way. Some use shotguns, others interceptor plates.

*Spaced Armor - Spaced Armor is what it sounds like. Armor with a large gap. This gap helps dissipate the shaped charge, but does Jack shit for long rod penetrators, as, uh, air and two bits of metal ain't that fab for stopping a large mach 5 metal object. The best example are goofy-looking thin plates around a WWII German tank's turret and tracks (''Schürzen'' or skirts). Although they were initially designed to reduce the power of AT guns, but breaking up attacks in the gap, they proved just as efficient against HEAT charges later on.

===Support===
*Autoloaders - The main advantage to automating the loading process is that you could afford to have one less crew member, thus allocating better use of space and reducing crew complexity. That said, it does make your tank heavier, expensive, and more maintenance-intensive, and your autoloader goes along with your tank if its destroyed (a human has a chance of ejecting from the tank if destroyed and return back to his lines to man another tank in no time, the auto-loader has to be salvaged by an engineering team, just to assess if its still usable) while some (generally older) types make it slower to select ammo types on demand. Also, a human loader can do things besides loading, as the need arises and until recently could load as fast as the mechanism the first minute or so before tiring.

*Sensor arrays - Tanks have notoriously bad situational awareness, so people came up with solutions to improve it and avoid the tank crew sticking their head out and expose themselves to gunfire. In WWII, the Germans installed and armored cupola with vision slits atop the turret in order to improve the commander's sight while 'buttoned up'. Modern tanks get sensors and cameras to do the looking with minimal crew exposure.

*Remote Weapon Systems - The pintle-mounted gun is great for clearing out and suppressing infantry because it can rotate 360 degrees and is at the top of the tank, so it has a bird's-eye view of the area. Unfortunately, popping your head out to shoot at people makes you a prime target for snipers. A solution for this is by having the pintle gun be virtually controlled from the inside by a remote weapon system, so the gunner can still shoot at targets without threat of catching a bullet in the face the moment they peek out of the hatch. Granted the gun itself can still be shot, but its a lot easier to replace a machine gun than a trained crewman. The aforementioned blurb regarding replacing the MG with grenade launchers also apply here.
**The Russian T-14 Armata has reached another level with this, the entire turret being unmanned and remotely controlled.

*Automatic Fire Extinguisher. Fire? No problem. Tap a button or just wait a few seconds, and in the Abram's case, Halon gas at 7% puts it out.

*Blowout Ammo Compartment. A big problem in WW1 and 2 was tanks going up from the ammunition being detonated when hit (the remains of the crew would be... messy, to say the least. Frequently there wasn't anything left to bury besides vaguely body shaped ash). So we first came up with wet storage, which reduced and delayed such 'cooking off' tremendously. But since there was still some risk and with tanks costing more and more every generation, we invented blowouts for modern tanks. They're basically compartments that blow outwards when the ammunition is hit and begin to burn; they vent the bang away from the main body of the machine, thus saving the million dollar tank (and the squishy but almost equally expansive meatbags inside). Sure, the tank must retreat to restock ammo, a new storage bin and some tuning up; but it can still fight with a small repair... if your ammo storage compartment wasn't open the moment it was hit, that is, which is not unheard of, and had no HE or HEAT shells in it (the reason why M1 Abrams do not carry those).

==Crewmen==
Unlike a car or most combat airplanes, a tank isn't something that one person can fully operate alone (at least for today's standards). It is a large, complex machine that requires multiple people with specific tasks to keep it working. Never discount the importance of a well-trained crew, as they can be every bit as important as the selection of equipment. [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HV2nIkqnGBI While technically feasible] to operate a tank with only two people (a driver and a gunner, as was the case with the Renault FT), it’s much more practical to have more people per tank to divide the workload, especially since a successful tank battle is heavily determined by the time it takes to get off a successful shot. Early tanks were envisioned as 'landships' and had a crew of around ten men, but most tanks today have a crew of three or four, with some crewman having multiple duties to keep things as streamlined as possible.

*Commander - The commander is the one who issues orders to all crewmen. Their main responsibilities for the tank are navigating for the driver, spotting targets for the gunner, and coordinating everyone to work as one well-oiled deathmachine. They're also the one who typically mans the hatch-mounted machine gun when needed. In modern times, they are also responsible for the radio.
*Driver - Maneuvers the tank, but with a twist. Because the driver is typically near the bottom of the tank he only can see in front of him unless he sticks his head out of a hatch; his peripheral vision borders on inexistant. Because of that, they have to rely on the commander for precise maneuvers when the tank is traveling at full speed. That said, it is still possible for a driver to maneuver the tank on his own (yay for vision slits and/or cameras). In modern times, they also double up as the crew's mechanic.
*Gunner - Operates the tank's main cannon(s) and coaxial machine gun, again with a small twist. He's responsible for aiming the guns where they need to shoot and firing when appropriate. They can also double as a loader if one's not available. But because the gunsight is quite narrow they can only make fine adjustments on their own and so need the Commander to spot the target and give them the rough direction in which to point the gun in the first place for them to acquire it and blow it up. A tank typically only needs 1 gunner, but older models that have more than 1 main cannon (like the WW1 British Mark tanks) required a gunner for each gun.
*Loader - Assists the gunner by loading the appropriate ammunition into the main gun. Loaders are less common in modern tanks due to rise of autoloaders these days, but older tanks needed them to perform efficiently and the extra man has advantages his own. These include helping in field repairs and helping fuel the tank up and in the Abrams' case manning a second pintle gun.
*Mechanic - Responsible for fixing up the tank when it breaks down (well, the whole crew pitches in but he's the guy with the knowledge). In later years to ease space concerns; the driver typically doubles as the crew's mechanic.
*Radio Operator - Operates the radio and relays any orders and communications with friendly forces to the commander. Due to advancements in radio technology; radio operators are no longer needed in modern tanks as the commander can do that on their own these days.

==Types of Tanks==

Whether it's real or fantasy, tanks are classified from their weight and/or armament profile. A modern catch all term for all purpose built and improvised combat vehicles, not necessarily tanks, is Armored Fighting Vehicle (AFV). Here are the common ones:

===Not Actually Tanks===
Despite having treads and a gun, the following vehicles are not considered tanks. The difference is that tanks are designed for frontline Combat", while other vehicles with treads are designed to carry and support infantry (APC/IFV), bombard enemy positions with heavy artillery (SPGs), or act as general support weapon systems. Many of these vehicles are light enough to be deployed by aircraft, giving them an edge over tanks in response time to emerging threats. If it isn't a purpose built chasis, they are frequently based on the previous or current tank being used to simplify logistics.

*'''Armored Personnel Carrier''' - APCs are light vehicles designed to carry infantry and not much else. They're usually given a heavy machine gun to support the infantry they're carrying into battle and to defend itself, and not much else. They're designed to protect against small arms fire, not tank shells. Unlike IFVs, APCs are not expected to fight on the front due to their lackluster protection and armaments. However, they're sometimes also amphibious, something that the vast majority of tanks are not, allowing for both seafront assaults and quick getaways down waterways. Don't expect anything bigger than a HMG (that being under 20mm, usually also under or equal to 15mm) and a grenade launcher. Very rarely a low caliber (20 to under 25mm) autocannon may be present. May have a couple ATGMs (Anti Tank Guided Missile) to surpress the enemy but it isn't designed to stay in a firefight, an APC is first and foremost a transport.
Examples: [[Rhino]], [[M113 Armored Personnel Carrier|M113]], Namer (notably, it is based on the Merkava, an MBT, and has unusually tough armor)

*'''Self-propelled gun (SPG)''' - Vehicles armed with artillery weapons designed to bomb the enemy back into the stone age, ranging from howitzers, mortars, or missile systems. Typically built similarly to tanks, but sacrifice armor for their heavy guns since in normal circumstances they should be too far away to get shot at directly. Not to mention that some artillery pieces have a minimum range where they can drop their payload; thus, the SPG needs to put some distance between them and their target so that they can be in effective range. The advantage to having such artillery on an actual vehicle rather than being stationary, is that counter-battery fire can threaten static guns, while mobile guns can safely get out of the danger zone once they've delivered their payload. Self-propelled guns typically carry a 150+mm Howitzer, much larger than what any proper tank would carry. While mobile rocket platforms such as the [[BM-21 Hail]] or MLRS are more popular than Self-propelled guns and are capable of absolutely soaking an area in rocket spam, the SPG has the advantage of being able to sustain fire for longer periods of time. Besides that, most SPGs can also depress the barrel enough to engage something directly which can be useful in some situations (avoiding collateral damage, for instance). Do note that standard operating procedure for SPGs is to <s>leg it like a little bitch</s> tactically redeploy if the enemy close on their position: even if they carry a big gun, they are not front-line capable vehicles. Direct engagement is avoided even if a huge shell will ruin a punk's day just fine. May have a machine gun or two just in case (and theoretical anti-air in older models), or an autocannon if the armed force is particularly passive aggresive and has money to blow on useless overkill.
Examples: [[Basilisk Artillery Gun]], [[M109 Howitzer]]

*'''Self-propelled anti-aircraft gun (SPAAG)''' - Tank-like vehicles armed with weaponry designed to shoot aircraft out of the sky to provide mobile anti-air cover. There are only three real ways to shoot a very fast moving aircraft out of the sky. [[Dakka|First you can use as many rapid fire guns as you can to fill the air with as many bullets as you can and hope for one hit]]. Second, you can fire one big shell up into the air and at a certain height have it explode spraying shrapnel around it self to score the one hit you need, this are known as Anti Air Artillery, and are known in the English world by the name the Germans used during World War 2, flak. Both have been superseded by AA missiles which can track a target and put that shrapnel warhead closer to the target than just guess work and a slide rule can. Others use both guns and SAMs. As a sidenote, flak tanks (and half-tracks) equipped with heavy machine guns and small autocannons have a nasty reputation as being infantry trouncers as multiple barrels spewing lead at high speed will turn soft ground targets into mulch very quickly. Indeed, both the M19 MGMC and the M42 Duster were primarily used in this role despite having been envisioned as point-defense SPAAGs. That role had something of a heyday between WW2 and Vietnam, with the quad mount 50 cal M45's being nicknamed Kraut Mover and the twin 40mm's of the M42 being used to lumberjack VC hiding in treelines. Modern variants mostly have guided missiles and the BRRRRT variants are usually not mounted on tanks.
Examples: [[Hydra Flak Tank]], [[ZSU 23-4 Shilka]]

*'''Infantry Fighting Vehicle''' - Known as IFVs, these almost-tanks are capable of transporting infantry forces, while being armored and armed enough to be of support to the field, unlike light tanks. However, unlike true tanks, IFVs can't be expected to stand up to enemy armor. Modern IFV's can have anti tank missiles, but with their tin can armor, going toe to toe with a main battle tank is suicide and so it supports regular tanks or takes on enemy armor in emergencies. While APCs and IFV can share similar roles and armaments today, the main way to distinguish them is with their main gun: anything that has a main gun smaller than 25mm is classed as an APC, and anything higher is an IFV. IFVs are designed to stay and fight (though not toe to toe with enemy tanks) and act as direct fire support. Effectively, when comparing a squad with an IFV vs a squad with an APC, the later is an infantry squad with a transport, the former is a (light) tank that can dismount some of its crew.
Examples: [[Chimera]], [[Razorback]], [[BMP]], M2 Bradley

*'''Armored Reconnaissance Vehicle''' - In some ways they can be confused for IFVs in that these vehicles are similarly equipped and focus on mobility, and may even have limited troop capacities. But where they mainly differ is in doctrinal use: Armored Recon is mainly used to provide independent support to a recon team rather than support front-line troops. As such, troop carrying capacity isn't as necessary if it has any at all. See below the Infantry vs Cavalry Tank distinction as it can apply here as well, since modern cavalry units use such vehicles. Some IFV's share a base chasis with ARVs , those ARVs are usually called Cavalry Figthing Vehicles (CFV).
Examples: [[Salamander Reconnaissance Tank]], [[LAV-25]], [[M113 MRV]], M3 Bradley

*'''Tank Destroyer''' - Tank destroyers are specialist armor designed for one thing in mind: knocking out armor and not much else. Some are turreted, and some aren't. Most modern ones use guided missiles, all historical and some modern use cannons. What makes them not tanks is a matter of technicality. Tanks are designed for general military purpose (so useful for a range of tasks) while tank destroyers are for only one thing, destroying armor (especially on vehicles). After World War 2 we figured out that since tanks fought other tanks so often anyway tank destroyers don't really make sense so we upgraded the guns on regular tanks, while the role of “Light Anti-Armor Vehicle” was taken by ATGM carriers, which being mostly modified LAVs, have the ability to kill tanks while being very mobile and easy to transport. A handful of cannon-armed Tank Destroyers still exist, some tracked, others wheeled, but they're a rare breed. They tend to be considered for use with airborne troops in need of anti-armor capability (since a proper tank tends to be too heavy to airdrop) and for certain strategic mobility concerns.
Examples: [[Leman Russ Battle Tank#Destroyer Tank Hunter|Destroyer Tank Hunter]], [[Leman Russ Battle Tank#Leman Russ Vanquisher|Leman Russ Vanquisher]], [[M901 ITV]]

*'''Assault guns''', Similar to tank destroyers, assault guns differ in one important way: instead of an anti-tank gun, they're armed with a anti-building weapon, frequently a howitzer. These tended to be fairly big and fairly heavy compared to SPGs, because they're made to get in close to heavy fortifications. After World War 2 assault guns became light air-dropped weapons to support airborne troops if they encountered hard targets. They are comparatively very rare in modern orders of battle. Most that remain are in the Third World (usually WW2 Soviet vintage, they made a LOT of things).
Examples: [[Vindicator]], [[Leman Russ Battle Tank#Leman Russ Demolisher|Leman Russ Demolisher]]

===Proper tanks===
*'''Male/Female''': A very, Very, Very early design and designation of tank done only really during the first world war when the British were still trying to figure out how this whole tank thing worked. The difference is obvious, male tanks have cannons, and female tanks have only machine guns. In modern time however the terms are completely obsolete since, almost by definition a tank has a cannon so making tanks without cannons is a rather silly. Nether the less you can point to a few very light tanks as being in the same vein as the British female tanks, but only if small caliber autocannons count as 'machine guns.
Examples: [https://1d4chan.org/wiki/Land_Raider#Crusader_Pattern Land Raider Crusader] and [https://1d4chan.org/wiki/Land_Raider#Phobos_Pattern Phobos pattern] (female and male respectively)

*'''Tankettes''' - Less of a tank and more of an armored clown car with guns; these were in vogue for a while in the 1930s. They're essentially a one or two-person tank, armed with machine guns, flame throwers, or anti-tank rifles and not designed to move much faster than the infantry around them (except for the italians, whose [[Wikipedia:L3/35|cute lil' buggers]] could reach a respectable speed). They're generally made to act as mobile infantry support or anti-tank weapons. Needless to say, this idea didn't stick because when even a high-caliber machine gun (which WW2 was rife with) could penetrate the armor of the tank, making it useless in straight-up combat. Only the Japanese extensively used them during WW2, which made some sense as most of their combat theater is in jungles that would bog-down full-sized tanks (Plus their doctrine emphasized more on air and naval superiority, with them island-hopping during their conquests). Tankettes however, were still fielded in limited quantities after WW2 due to their light weight that allowed them to be safely air-dropped, mainly for non-front line use like tank destroyers, AA guns, and recon vehicles. The only tankette still in use is the German Sedan-sized Wiesel, an airdropped scout vehicle. In effect, the smallest of the tankettes with a crew of one were an attempt to make an individual soldier into a one man tank to allow them to support their comrades. [[Power Armour|Sounds]] [[Centurion Squad|familiar]], [[Terminator|doesn't]] [[Battlesuit|it]]?
Examples: [[Sentinel]] (effectively)

*'''Light Tank''' - These are lightly armored tanks that sacrifice armor and firepower for maneuverability. They are not meant to be front-line combat tanks, as their armaments are usually too underpowered to go against heavier vehicles, rather they're usually relegated to reconnaissance duties and infantry support. Light tanks would carry guns that ranged from 37mm-45mm, though some early German Panzers were only equipped with machineguns. Some modern equivalents serve as Scout Tanks which are usually capable of paradrops.
Examples: [[Siegfried]], [[M551 Sheridan]]

*'''Heavy tank''' - The big boys, armed with the biggest guns and the thickest armor. Heavy tanks are what you send to crack an enemy defensive line as they slowly (or not-so slowly, as German and American heavies could reach similar speeds as their mediums) rumbled forward, guns blazing, destroying anything in sight... Except eventually Medium tanks, which split the difference between light and heavy tanks having more firepower than the former and more mobility then the latter, are just more cost effective and Heavy tanks are not too much better than improved mediums, which evolved into the main battle tank. Some heavy tanks were actually variants of medium tanks with heavier armor and/or guns, most notably those of the M4 Sherman. Heavy tanks typically carried 88mm-120mm cannons.
Examples: [[Sicaran Battle Tank]]

*'''Main Battle Tank/Medium tank''' - Medium tanks, which were generally made to carry guns close to a heavy with mobility not far off a light, evolved into main battle tanks. These would become the primary tank for modern nations by combining high speed, adequate armor and most of all a powerful gun. MBT's are not as heavy as we could theoretically make a tank (although modern advances like reactive armor plates, have allowed them to still be as survivable as true heavies, while springing for a modern heavy could make it theoretically unkillable in a slugging match but vulnerable to guided munitions) but their speed makes up for it and they act as the spearhead of an assault force designed to create and exploit a gap in enemy defenses to allow massed mechanized forces to rush though the gap. Interwar and early WWII mediums usually had 37mm or 50mm cannons. WWII era medium tanks carried 75mm-90mm cannons, first generation (basically optimised mediums that still had a few optimised heavies accompanying them), second gen and the very first gen 3 MBTs typically had 105mm guns, and second gen retrofits and proper third gens (the modern generation of tanks, with the very newest named 3+ or 4) generally have a minimum cannon size of 120 mm or so, with the Russians coming in with 125's that can fire ATGMs and Rheinmetall building 130mm guns to counter them (there was also a test variant of the M1 Abrams with a 140mm gun).
Examples: [[Leman Russ Battle Tank]], [[M1 Abrams]]

*'''Infantry/Cavalry tank''' - A British and French design doctrine, the theory for the design goes like this. Infantry tanks support infantry, (hence the name) and therefore they don't need to go fast and can carry heavy armor while their guns did not have to be terribly strong to support the infantry. However they were too slow to use the line breaks they created (a problem in World War 1) hence the need for the Calvary tank. Cavalry or cruiser tanks were much, much lighter and were designed to move fast and rush though a gap the Infantry tanks made but could not use and create havoc behind enemy lines cutting communication, destroying supplies, etc. The idea was sound, however technology advanced so that Cruiser tanks could have the armor of a infantry tank without the slowness, and infantry tanks could have the speed of the Cruiser's meaning the distinction became meaningless. Before World War II, Russia had a similar idea for three different types of tanks, a breakthrough tank acting as an infantry tank, one tactical breakthrough tank, and a 'fast tank' to exploit gaps. The Cavalry tank role has been pretty much taken over by airdropped armored vehicles such as IFVs or Tank Destroyers.

*'''Flame tank''': a tank (going from tankette to heavy, all types were used in WWII) with a [[meme|werfer zat werf flammen]] instead of a big gun as main weapon. Only used in the 1920s-1950s as they were quickly rendered obsolete (it was more cost-effective and just as efficient to have standard tanks have a flamethrower as a coaxial gun), though incendiary weapons of various sorts are still used today, mainly in artillery roles. Typically unpopular with both forces using and opposing them for many reasons: the implications of this weapon were very harsh as the typical man-portable flamethrower has a range of 60 meters max (video games lied to ME?!) and their heavy mechanized versions could reach most of a quarter mile with their concentrated hydraulic spray of diesel fuel. Flame tanks were supposed to start with a "Wet fire", basically spraying the fuel without igniting it into bunkers or fortifications to get enemy units to realize just how hard they were fucked, really weren't protected from the coming blaze at all and in turn they would surrender before being cooked to death. Which a vast majority actually did when '''''hosed with gasoline'''''. The problem was that, due to either open fighting, soldiers that just wouldn't surrender or sadistic crews/commanders, the weapons were often fired outright the first time around to horrific physical and psychological impact on both sides - burning, screaming soldiers, the fumes making crews sick, thick diesel smoke inhalation or oxygen depletion asphyxiating those in poorly ventilated areas (especially caves in the Pacific Front) and the smell of burnt human flesh permanently seared in their minds meant that instant life derailing post-traumatic stress disorder was a very common side effect of witnessing a flame tank in action. Another was that flame tank crews that were captured were usually subjected to torture and summary revenge executions. In the end, flame tanks are remembered as a job nobody wanted to do, an enemy nobody wanted to face, a weapon that accomplished little that soldiers using the man-portable variety (which already had a bad rep' but was begrudgingly tolerated by soldiers as tactically necessary to avoid chemical warfare, nobody in their right mind wanted to clear caves out directly) could not do and pushed the propaganda and soldier's beliefs forward that the enemy truly were barbarians and made of evil, all pushed ahead because a Commissa -- I mean General far removed from the field said they were necessary. Real life Grimdark indeed.
Examples: L3/35 "Lanciafiamme", M3 "Satan", M4 "Crocodile", Flammpanzer III, Churchill Crocodile, Kliment Voroshilov model 8, OT-34, technically any tank with incendiary or thermobaric ammo

*'''Super Heavy Tank''' - Superheavies were conceived in World War I, essentially using the term "landship" literally. Armed with giant cannon (sometimes multiple ones, and usually reserved for artillery or battleships) and armor plating so heavy, you'd mistake it for a fortress; they were meant to be the ultimate line breakers. While some prototypes were fleshed out, none (except for the French [[Wikipedia:Char 2C|Char 2C]], although it arrived too late to be used in WW1 and was obsolete in WW2) were put into service because they were simply too impractical. They were often too heavy to be supported by most roads (and off-road would have been worse), and were a logistical nightmare since their engines guzzled gas like no tomorrow. There was also the combined problem of being so slow and so large that they were easy targets for artillery spotters and bombers and it was near impossible to hide in the field due to it's large profile, so it was easy to disable the tank even before it got into effective range (No matter how much armor you put on a tank, artillery designed to level structures will eventually turn it into an expensive hunk of scrap metal). Overall, commanders found out that it was much better to send out multiple medium/heavy tanks to do the job, than sending a single super heavy. Still, because the idea of a multi-turret warship on treads is universally hella cool, that didn't stop writers from including such weapons in the arsenal of their armies, just to show how powerful they are. Super-Heavy prototypes had cannons that could range between 120mm-280mm, with the Nazis having many of the more absolutely ludicrous designs *cough*''Ratte''*cough*''Maus''*cough*. At the end of the day, this whole concept ended up being a useless waste of money in real life, at least until technology improves sufficiently.
Examples: [[Baneblade]], Maus

==Tanks in Warhammer 40,000==

Since [[Games Workshop]] seems to think that tank development in the [[Warhammer 40,000]] universe stopped somewhere between the World Wars, most of the iconic fighting vehicles of the [[Imperium]] are a mish-mash of modern and historical designs. We can quibble that some of those vehicles are not really tanks but armored personnel carriers (e.g. the [[Land Raider]]) or other specialized classes of armored fighting vehicles, but GW's design team has a serious problem with looping their tracks all the way up and over the chassis for that 1918 flavor, and not even in the correct direction for what they were designed for. A variety of other vehicles in the 40k universe are referred to as tanks, but these are often hovering vehicles like those used by the [[Tau]] or [[Eldar]], and thus technically don't count.

==Real vs Fictional Tank Designs==

Its important to know that games like WH40K subscribes to the rule of cool, rather than logic. So while things like the [[Land Raider]] or [[Baneblade]] looks cool; in a real combat situation, these tanks would range from highly impractical to down-right detrimental for everyone involved. Here's a short list of why real-world tanks, aren't designed like most fantasy tanks.

===Profile===

Since WW2 and beyond, one of the main concerns of a tank designer has always been reducing a tank's profile as low as possible. This is for this main reason: it makes the tank harder to spot, and shoot at, at range. The others are mainly for mobility, like making the center of gravity lower so it doesn't flip over on uneven terrain, or smaller so its able to operate in various locales. Plus smaller tanks mean less material used, so that can be used on another tank or given to another project.

Sure it seems odd that this would be taken into account, given a tank is as large as a city bus; but since WW2: it wasn't really ''that'' hard to disable a tank (rocket launchers, mines, anti-tank guns, AT grenades, aerial bombers, artillery, better concealed tanks, to name the most common), if your opponent had the weapon to do so, and if they didn't: making a tank unnecessarily large just made it easier for your opponent to spot you. Thus, making your tank's profile as low and small as possible, contributed in making it less of an easy target, while still being able to act like a priority target for your opponent.

===Speed===

Like what we've described above: it wasn't that hard to stop a tank with the proper armaments (or at least avoid it once spotted) and once your opponent has the guns to stop it, your hulking behemoth will slowly turn into a liability soon enough. (And even if they didn't have the guns; that makes your tank too-slow of a threat, which beggars the question as to why have it there in the first place).

Tanks were also pretty vulnerable on their own, requiring infantry support to deal with targets at close range (the co-axial gun only had limited elevation and was slow to aim as the entire turret had to face the target, and the pintle-mounted gun was limited to the line of sight of the gunner) as a nutter with a powerful-enough explosive could easily run/sneak to an unsupported tank and blow it to smithereens, or disable it (which pretty much meant the tank is still toast).

Nazi Germany got around this problem by using mechanized infantry (troops transported in vehicles) to support their armored forces, so everyone picked up on that and started making tanks fast enough to keep up with infantry transports to create a combined-arms assault, allowing tanks to deal with hard targets while infantry dealt with other targets that were too small for the tanks to take care of.

So, people started distancing themselves from heavyweight tanks, and started using lighter, but more faster tanks in modern combat (plus advances in modern technology made it that even a medium tank could still be as survivable and powerful as a true heavy, while still retaining maneuvrability).

===Mobility===

An immobile tank, is a dead tank, so people have gone to great lengths to either reduce, or outright remove the many ways on how infantry could disable a tank from moving; but the most common of this is by taking out the tracks with mines or explosives. This was partly fixed by putting the tracks at ground level, covering the tracks with armor, and adding additional armor skirts to further guard it from attacks from the side, ensuring that little of the tracks were exposed to direct enemy fire. Sure it was still vulnerable up-close and mines can still do a number on it, but that's what your infantry support is for (you did bring them, right?).

While the British Mark 1's rhomboid-tracks looks cool; having that on a tank today made it ''incredibly'' easy for an opposing force to disable your vehicle, as the tracks could be easily targeted. Plus even if you were to cover it in armor; it made your tank unnecessarily bigger, and people wanted to make their tanks as low and small as humanly possible. It also made maintenance and repairs unnecessarily complicated (Have to repair the tracks? Too bad, now you gotta get on top of your tall tank to fix that. Hope snipers aren't watching.).

Also while the sponsor-mounted guns look cool, they're useless in modern tank combat. Apart from the obvious issues of being unable to bring your full-firepower to bear if your opponent isn't situated right infront of you AND that they have to be larger than the width of your tank: having two of your sophisticated weapon systems near ground level meant a plethora of reliability issues (went through water or muddy terrain? Pray to the Machine God your gun doesn't malfunction if you didn't clean that right away. Went through a building? Hope all that rubble didn't tear off anything important.).

Also note that this setup was done to for trench and fortification clearing, not tank vs tank combat (since WW1 focused on trench warfare than mechanized assaults). Having your turret in be centered with the hull itself, either with a turret or having it built into the tank itself to save on parts, was infinitely more effective. It also made weight distribution more balanced, which made it easier for tanks to maneuver in rough terrain.

===Logistics===

This should be an obvious point, but the Imperium of Man has only been able to create and maintain ludicrous super-heavy tank designs, because they have the aid of the Mechanicus (even if they've been reduced to a shadow of their former glory) to assist with creation and maintenance, plus having access to thousands of planets full of resources to get materiel and fuel from. Plus the creative liberties of simply accepting that: "It just works" and "THE FUTURE", because it'd be boring if we had to explain that a Forgeworld couldn't build a Baneblade because some mining world couldn't produce the output or the resources for it were earmarked to other projects, rather than something more exciting, like foul traitors constantly assailing their supply lines, or the techpriests needs some McGuffin stolen by the Orks.

Another design point for tanks is resource economy. It had (and still has) to be produced using, and maintained with, the least possible amount of resources whilst still being formidable in it's role. If an army would deploy superheavies today, just remotely near the scale of how Imperial forces do during wartime; they'd be bankrupt and end up with a lopsided army. If creation didn't eat up most of their supplies; the amount of resources they'd need to keep these war machines maintained would put the US Army to shame. Once they realize they can't keep it up; they'd start scrapping those and scramble to turn them into practical tanks (assuming they still had fuel left).

===Armaments===
Putting two cannons as your tank's main armament like C&C's Mammoth Tank looks neat like the, or [[Baneblade|UNLEASHING ELEVEN BARRELS OF HELL]] sounds awesome, but that had it's own set of problems. One is that putting a lot of main guns on your tank requires you to make the chassis bigger, as you need more room to accommodate the guns, ammunition, and larger engine (as you need more power to keep that sucker mobile), which already makes it a bigger target.

Another is that its a waste of resources; those other main guns, ammo, and materials, would be better put in making another tank, and two tanks are still more threatening than one. Its also either overkill, as the main guns of today's battle tanks can typically penetrate tank armor easily enough, or worthless since if you did meet a tank with armor too strong for you guns, having more of them is not typically gonna help. You don't really need multiple turrets going off at the same time. The probable rate-of-fire and firepower advantage you have over tanks with only one gun, would be easily off-set with auto-loaders, specialized ammunition, and/or a well-drilled gunner crew. That or an auxiliary missile launcher, which is loads more practical and cost-effective.

One more, is that in the event your tank is destroyed; that's a massive ammo-cookoff you're looking at, which can be dangerous to both the crew, and surrounding friendlies.

==Character Role==

''See also [[Combat roles]] for other roles''

In many role-playing games, particularly the online ones, the term "tank" has also arisen to describe a character whose primary purpose is redirect all damage from enemies to himself. This was one of the primary purpose of actual tanks as well; tanks, being as armored and threatening, are supposed to get most of the enemy's attention while the squishier units like infantry and light vehicles move into advantageous positions to deal more damage, without the threat of serious retaliation.

See, many enemies in RPGs have ''way too much health'', deal way too much damage for most classes to withstand, and fights with them are unlikely to be decided in one round unless they're uncharacteristically vulnerable to save-or-die rays (which almost never happens).

Furthermore, many of the classes that are best at dealing damage (assassin and wizard types, for example) often have very little survivability when it comes to being punched in the face, in order to balance out classes. If a class can both tank damage and deal high damage at the same time, they either render other classes redundant or can do neither as well as a dedicated tank or damage dealer. (This is where the gaming term differs from the historical/military term - a "pure" tank (unit role) is strictly something that attracts and survives damage, without much or even necessarily any of the punch a tank (vehicle type) has.)

Thus, demand is created for a character whose job is to redirect enemies' aggression away from the squishy members of the party and towards them instead, usually using their mastery of mind-control, irritating sound effects, imposition of dangerous effects for attacking anyone else, or simply cutting insults and rude gestures which draw attention to themselves. They also tend to have abilities that help them in resisting, mitigating, avoiding, or regenerating from some of the damage they suffer (and on occasion act as a secondary damage dealer). In most cases, tanks are also often reliant on healer classes as well to keep them alive while they do their thing, as enemies that require tanks can usually deplete a good chunk of their health in a few attacks. Making sure that chunk is constantly restored is required to make sure they can keep at it.

''[[4th Edition Dungeons and Dragons| Fourth Edition]]'' refers to this role as the "defender," while ''[[Dawn of War 2]]'' vets will recognize it as the "[[Tarkus]]", and later the "[[Apollo Diomedes|Diomedes]]." While it is most obvious in online video games, the necessity of drawing fire away from squishier party members toward tougher ones who can take a beating exists in a variety of different games, from [[Sentinels of the Multiverse| cooperative card games]] to MOBAs. The wargame equivalent would be the [[DISTRACTION CARNIFEX]].

==See Also==
*[[Team Yankee]] - a tabletop game that revolves around late Cold War tank warfare, with plenty of info on real-world tanks.

{{Vehicle Warfare}}

[[Category:History]]
[[Category:Vehicles]]

Burning of Prospero

2020-08-31T20:13:30Z

2A02:1811:5180:A200:EC3D:29FD:FA1D:618: /* Endgame */

{{Infobox 40k Campaign
|title=The Battle of Prospero
|image=
|attacker= Imperial Censure Host
|defender= Thousand Sons
|commander1= The [[Primarch]] [[Leman Russ]], Constantine Valdor, Jenetia Krole
|commander2= The [[Primarch]] [[Magnus the Red]], [[Ahriman]]
|date=004.M31
|scale=Planetary
|theatre=[[Horus Heresy]]
|strength1= ~73,200 [[Space Wolves]], 5000 [[Sons of Horus]], 982 Custodians, 3000 [[Sisters of Silence]], over 54,000 human infantry from various regiments, 12 Battle Titans, 5 Psi-Titans, over 2000 Mechanicum Secutarii and Tech Adept staff.
|strength2= ~62,200 [[Thousand Sons]], the [[Prospero Spireguard|Prosperine Guard]] ''(~85,000 soldiers)'', Zhao-Arkhad Taghmata ''(~8000 warriors & automata)'', 12 Battle Titans, millions of citizen reservists
|casualties1= 49,000 total. 23,000 Space Wolves KIA and 23,000 Imperial Army KIA. Severe Custodes and Sisters of Silence casualties
|casualties2= Very heavy. 90% of the Thousand Sons KIA. 30 million Prosperine Spireguard and civilians wiped out
|status= Pyrrhic Space Wolf victory
|outcome= Razing of Prospero, withdrawal of the Thousand Sons to Sortiarius and the sundering of Magnus the Red.
}}
The '''Burning of Prospero''' was the entirely avoidable full scale invasion and destruction of Prospero, homeworld of the [[Thousand Sons]], by the [[Space Wolves]]. Also involved were the Custodes, Sisters of Silence, Titans, Mechanicum, Imperial Army and, for some reason, 5000 Sons of Horus. This battle was pretty significant in that this was the first time that an Astartes Legion fought another Legion (well maybe not the [[Primarch#Two Missing Primarchs|first time]]). It was also one of the first battles of the Horus Heresy.

==How Did This Happen?==
The Burning of Prospero had it's roots in the [[Council of Nikaea]] where the [[God-Emperor of Mankind|Emperor]] personally declared that [[Librarians]] and psychic powers were so last millennium and banned the Legions from using them. In a way, the Council was also the trial of [[Magnus the Red]], Primarch of the Thousand Sons, for he was accused of sorcery and dabbling with the warp when he had sworn not to. There was also a deep distrust of psykers which did make things a bit biased. Anyway the result of Council results in Librarians and the use of psychic powers were banned in the Legions. This caused a problem for the Thousand Sons who made extensive use of psychic powers in their conquests. So they did the most logical thing, ignore the ruling and continue messing around with the Warp. Nothing could go wrong.

==Things go wrong==
During his meditations, Magnus saw a vision where [[Horus]] turned against the Emperor and cause a giant civil war. Failing to stop Horus from turning traitor due to interference from [[Erebus|this piece of shit]], Magnus decided to use sorcery to call the Emperor and warn him. By doing this he could personally deliver the news to Big E and also prove just how essential psychic powers were (and validate the use of sorcery). Unfortunately, this fucked things up tremendously, as Magnus's phone call breached through psychic barriers of the Webway and allowed [[Daemons|friendly little critters]] to enter the Imperial Palace and start causing mischief. So not only had Magnus wrecked the Emperor's Webway Project but he had also broken the Edict of Nikaea which pissed the Emperor off to no ends, he banished Magnus from sight and ignored his warnings about Horus.
[[File:Prospero.jpg|500px|thumb|left|Russ and his legion cleanse Prospero.]]
Back on Prospero, Magnus realized that he had been manipulated by a [[Tzeentch|giant demon cuttlefish]] and saw how he had not only screwed over himself, but the Imperium as well. He decided to stop fucking things up and just waited passively for the retribution that was sure to come instead of doing any number of things. Like trying to talk to the [[Leman Russ|guy who was sent to get him]], who actually did try communicating with Magnus to find out what happened. (Magnus just refused to talk to him, although whether Russ would have believed Horus going full heretic is another bag of dicks). He also decided to hide any knowledge of the incoming Imperial Forces from the Thousand Sons so they wouldn't fight back and ruin their chance for redemption (the worst fucking idea in the world as it had the opposite effect). He also covered Prospero under a psychic shield that blocked astropathic communications and prevented the Legion Corvidae Sect from foreseeing the attack. Finally, he sent the Thousand Sons Fleet away from Prospero on some hidden mission.

Magnus wasn't wrong about incoming punishment as the Emperor decided that Magnus had broken the law and ordered [[Leman Russ]], Primarch of the [[Space Wolves]], to go arrest his brother and bring him back so the Emperor could spank his red ass. Unfortunately Horus, who had indeed turned traitor, intercepted the orders and changed the "arrest" to "kill" Magnus and the Thousand Sons, convincing Leman that trying to arrest Mr Strawberry would be a waste of time. Leman, who was never a fan of Magnus and his sorcery, agreed at the time.

To accompany the Space Wolves, the Emperor sent along Custodes, Sisters of Silence, some Imperial Army Regiments, 5 Psi Titans and a couple Mechanicum Taghmata. Horus also sent 5000 Sons of Horus and 12 Titans of the Legio Mortis. Constantin Valdor also came along, just to make sure everything went as planned.

The Imperial Fleet reached Prospero, which was still unaware of the incoming attack. Before beginning the attack, Russ tried to contact Magnus one last time to request he send away the civilians and surrender peacefully, as the order to kill him didn't sit right with hindsight, and independently he decided it would be a better idea to arrest his brother and figure out what happened. Magnus refused to answer his calls and thanks to Magnus' efforts, nobody else was able to communicate with the Thousand Sons, so after trying for a while and getting really pissed off, Leman ordered the attack to begin.

==The Attack Commences==
As Prospero had no fleet defending it, it only had the orbital defense batteries as protection. These batteries lasted mere moments against the Imperial Fleet. Once the last of the batteries were destroyed, the Imperials commenced an orbital bombardment on Prospero with magma bombs and mass drivers. The planet got fucked up so badly that moments after the bombardment started, Tizca, capital of Prospero, was the only population center left standing. This was because a group of sorcerers belong to the Raptora Sect managed to cast a psychic shield over the city. The Space Wolves kept bombarding the shield in an effort to overload it which gave the Thousand Sons commanders time to figure out what the fuck was going on. With Magnus being [[Corvus Corax|emo]], Chief Librarian [[Ahzek Ahriman]] took command and decided that if the Thousand Sons were going down then they were going to go down fighting.

With the bombardment proving ineffective against the psychic shield, Russ led his Legion down onto the planet. Deploying in assault boats of such numbers, the people of Tizca mistook the incoming wave for a large dust cloud. In their arrogance, the Thousand Sons hadn't bothered to put any anti-air defenses in Tizca so the Space Wolves had little problem deploying. The Prospero Spireguard and Tizcan Militia managed to finally respond and set up defensive positions. The Palatine Guard set up at the edge of the Space Wolves's deployment zone where their commander, Katon Aphea, positioned them with his tactical brilliance, ready to meet the invaders.

[[fail|Leman Russ and the Space Wolves overran Aphea's line in less than two minutes.]]

==The Battle continues==
By now the Thousand Sons had gotten their shit together and began counter attacking. With the help of their psychic powers, the Sons caught the Space Wolves off guard and inflicted heavy losses. Ahriman and the Scarab Occult even wiped out a large group of the furries. This happened across the city and soon the first defensive line was formed. Furthermore, Magister Khalophis of the Pyrae Sect went Pacific Rim and took control of the dormant Titan Canis Vertex and began raping the Space Wolves with large psychic fireballs. It looked like the line was holding.

But then things took a turn for the worst.

The Custodes arrived and started flexing on the Thousand Sons with their bling. To make matters worse, the Sisters of Silence made their presence known. Due to being [[blanks]], the Sisters had a devastating effect on the psychic Thousand Sons. While the Sons were able to eventually negate the Sisters' effect, Leman Russ had arrived and began teaching the Thousand Sons the way of rip and tear in person. Against a Primarch, the Sons stood no chance and skedaddled the fuck outta there.

Then things got even worse for the Thousand Sons.

The infamous Flesh Change, that had once threatened the Legion prior to the reunification with Magnus, decided to come back in force. Several Thousand Sons lost control of their powers and turned into [[Chaos Spawn|Chaos Spa- I mean... gribbly things]]. One Legionnaire's demise caused a pretty huge explosion which caught the Canis Vertex, causing it to overload and kill Khalophis with the feedback. It also toppled over and crushed a Pyramid. Understandably, the fact that several legionaries were turning into mutant creatures before their very eyes gave the Imperials hard evidence that the Thousand Sons had gone too deep with their sorcery and were truly damned. With their line in disarray, the Thousand Sons retreated to the Pyramid of Photep, Magnus's crib, and prepared to make a final stand.

==Endgame==
By now there were only 1,500 Thousand Sons Astartes left (before the retconned number anyway) and Leman Russ was closing in with a force that vastly outnumbered the Thousand Sons. In the ensuing battle, the Space Wolves deployed the [[Wulfen]] which horrified the Thousand Sons that the Wolves would deploy such abominations (though in fairness to the Space Wolves, the Thousand Sons were hardly in a position to accuse anyone of having abominations). With the Wolves tearing through the their lines, things were looking grim for the Thousand Sons. But then Magnus finally couldn't take the suffering of hios Legion any longer and got off hiss ass.

Magnus descended from his pyramid and began giving the fucking furries a piece of his mind, literally. His psychic powers caused havoc on the Imperials. He even killed tons of Space Wolves with a staring contest. He also took a minute to slow time and give Ahriman his book and some final instructions. Afterwards, he and Leman began some quality bonding time between brothers.

The duel between Magnus and Leman was very brutal. They fought each other alone, surrounded by onlookers shouting "Worldstar!" and recording the fight with their pict capturers. Russ broke Magnus's horn nipples, Magnus set Leman's hair on fire and both bitchslapped each other. At one point, Magnus even stabbed his arm into Leman's chest and stabbed one of his hearts, but then Russ broke said arm. At the climax of the duel, Russ blindly lashed out and struck Magnus's only weakness; his eye. Blinded, Magnus was helpless as the wolf king picked him up and crashed him down over his knee, breaking his back with such force that those watching reacted like so [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hHE6isPjdY4]. However before Leman could finish him off, Magnus decided to ragequit and teleported himself, the Thousand Sons and Tizca to [[Sortiarius]], aka the Planet of the Sorcerers. The Imperials had won.

==Aftermath==
Once they had finished wiping out the remaining Prosperine citizens, the Space Wolves enacted an [[Exterminatus]] on Prospero and left it a dead world. In his act of teleporting himself and his Legion away, Magnus shattered his physical form and became the first Daemon Primarch. The Thousand Sons felt they had been betrayed by the Emperor and thus joined Horus's merry gang of traitors. They would also bear a massive hate boner for the Space Wolves (unsurprisingly, Magnus didn't feel like telling them it was all his fault [[Skub|(because it was entirely the fault of the Space Wolves that they committed so may war crimes (the Nuremberg Defense is not valid))]]), finally taking "revenge" during the Siege of Fenris. The flesh change increased and started ravaging the Legion again. However Ahriman managed to cure it with his Rubix Cube but at the same time turned most of the Legion to dust. Understandably annoyed, Magnus exiled Ahriman for his act of stupidity.

In conclusion, '''local Primarch ruins everything.'''

{{40k-Timeline}}

Burning of Prospero

2020-08-31T20:11:54Z

2A02:1811:5180:A200:EC3D:29FD:FA1D:618: /* The Battle continues */

{{Infobox 40k Campaign
|title=The Battle of Prospero
|image=
|attacker= Imperial Censure Host
|defender= Thousand Sons
|commander1= The [[Primarch]] [[Leman Russ]], Constantine Valdor, Jenetia Krole
|commander2= The [[Primarch]] [[Magnus the Red]], [[Ahriman]]
|date=004.M31
|scale=Planetary
|theatre=[[Horus Heresy]]
|strength1= ~73,200 [[Space Wolves]], 5000 [[Sons of Horus]], 982 Custodians, 3000 [[Sisters of Silence]], over 54,000 human infantry from various regiments, 12 Battle Titans, 5 Psi-Titans, over 2000 Mechanicum Secutarii and Tech Adept staff.
|strength2= ~62,200 [[Thousand Sons]], the [[Prospero Spireguard|Prosperine Guard]] ''(~85,000 soldiers)'', Zhao-Arkhad Taghmata ''(~8000 warriors & automata)'', 12 Battle Titans, millions of citizen reservists
|casualties1= 49,000 total. 23,000 Space Wolves KIA and 23,000 Imperial Army KIA. Severe Custodes and Sisters of Silence casualties
|casualties2= Very heavy. 90% of the Thousand Sons KIA. 30 million Prosperine Spireguard and civilians wiped out
|status= Pyrrhic Space Wolf victory
|outcome= Razing of Prospero, withdrawal of the Thousand Sons to Sortiarius and the sundering of Magnus the Red.
}}
The '''Burning of Prospero''' was the entirely avoidable full scale invasion and destruction of Prospero, homeworld of the [[Thousand Sons]], by the [[Space Wolves]]. Also involved were the Custodes, Sisters of Silence, Titans, Mechanicum, Imperial Army and, for some reason, 5000 Sons of Horus. This battle was pretty significant in that this was the first time that an Astartes Legion fought another Legion (well maybe not the [[Primarch#Two Missing Primarchs|first time]]). It was also one of the first battles of the Horus Heresy.

==How Did This Happen?==
The Burning of Prospero had it's roots in the [[Council of Nikaea]] where the [[God-Emperor of Mankind|Emperor]] personally declared that [[Librarians]] and psychic powers were so last millennium and banned the Legions from using them. In a way, the Council was also the trial of [[Magnus the Red]], Primarch of the Thousand Sons, for he was accused of sorcery and dabbling with the warp when he had sworn not to. There was also a deep distrust of psykers which did make things a bit biased. Anyway the result of Council results in Librarians and the use of psychic powers were banned in the Legions. This caused a problem for the Thousand Sons who made extensive use of psychic powers in their conquests. So they did the most logical thing, ignore the ruling and continue messing around with the Warp. Nothing could go wrong.

==Things go wrong==
During his meditations, Magnus saw a vision where [[Horus]] turned against the Emperor and cause a giant civil war. Failing to stop Horus from turning traitor due to interference from [[Erebus|this piece of shit]], Magnus decided to use sorcery to call the Emperor and warn him. By doing this he could personally deliver the news to Big E and also prove just how essential psychic powers were (and validate the use of sorcery). Unfortunately, this fucked things up tremendously, as Magnus's phone call breached through psychic barriers of the Webway and allowed [[Daemons|friendly little critters]] to enter the Imperial Palace and start causing mischief. So not only had Magnus wrecked the Emperor's Webway Project but he had also broken the Edict of Nikaea which pissed the Emperor off to no ends, he banished Magnus from sight and ignored his warnings about Horus.
[[File:Prospero.jpg|500px|thumb|left|Russ and his legion cleanse Prospero.]]
Back on Prospero, Magnus realized that he had been manipulated by a [[Tzeentch|giant demon cuttlefish]] and saw how he had not only screwed over himself, but the Imperium as well. He decided to stop fucking things up and just waited passively for the retribution that was sure to come instead of doing any number of things. Like trying to talk to the [[Leman Russ|guy who was sent to get him]], who actually did try communicating with Magnus to find out what happened. (Magnus just refused to talk to him, although whether Russ would have believed Horus going full heretic is another bag of dicks). He also decided to hide any knowledge of the incoming Imperial Forces from the Thousand Sons so they wouldn't fight back and ruin their chance for redemption (the worst fucking idea in the world as it had the opposite effect). He also covered Prospero under a psychic shield that blocked astropathic communications and prevented the Legion Corvidae Sect from foreseeing the attack. Finally, he sent the Thousand Sons Fleet away from Prospero on some hidden mission.

Magnus wasn't wrong about incoming punishment as the Emperor decided that Magnus had broken the law and ordered [[Leman Russ]], Primarch of the [[Space Wolves]], to go arrest his brother and bring him back so the Emperor could spank his red ass. Unfortunately Horus, who had indeed turned traitor, intercepted the orders and changed the "arrest" to "kill" Magnus and the Thousand Sons, convincing Leman that trying to arrest Mr Strawberry would be a waste of time. Leman, who was never a fan of Magnus and his sorcery, agreed at the time.

To accompany the Space Wolves, the Emperor sent along Custodes, Sisters of Silence, some Imperial Army Regiments, 5 Psi Titans and a couple Mechanicum Taghmata. Horus also sent 5000 Sons of Horus and 12 Titans of the Legio Mortis. Constantin Valdor also came along, just to make sure everything went as planned.

The Imperial Fleet reached Prospero, which was still unaware of the incoming attack. Before beginning the attack, Russ tried to contact Magnus one last time to request he send away the civilians and surrender peacefully, as the order to kill him didn't sit right with hindsight, and independently he decided it would be a better idea to arrest his brother and figure out what happened. Magnus refused to answer his calls and thanks to Magnus' efforts, nobody else was able to communicate with the Thousand Sons, so after trying for a while and getting really pissed off, Leman ordered the attack to begin.

==The Attack Commences==
As Prospero had no fleet defending it, it only had the orbital defense batteries as protection. These batteries lasted mere moments against the Imperial Fleet. Once the last of the batteries were destroyed, the Imperials commenced an orbital bombardment on Prospero with magma bombs and mass drivers. The planet got fucked up so badly that moments after the bombardment started, Tizca, capital of Prospero, was the only population center left standing. This was because a group of sorcerers belong to the Raptora Sect managed to cast a psychic shield over the city. The Space Wolves kept bombarding the shield in an effort to overload it which gave the Thousand Sons commanders time to figure out what the fuck was going on. With Magnus being [[Corvus Corax|emo]], Chief Librarian [[Ahzek Ahriman]] took command and decided that if the Thousand Sons were going down then they were going to go down fighting.

With the bombardment proving ineffective against the psychic shield, Russ led his Legion down onto the planet. Deploying in assault boats of such numbers, the people of Tizca mistook the incoming wave for a large dust cloud. In their arrogance, the Thousand Sons hadn't bothered to put any anti-air defenses in Tizca so the Space Wolves had little problem deploying. The Prospero Spireguard and Tizcan Militia managed to finally respond and set up defensive positions. The Palatine Guard set up at the edge of the Space Wolves's deployment zone where their commander, Katon Aphea, positioned them with his tactical brilliance, ready to meet the invaders.

[[fail|Leman Russ and the Space Wolves overran Aphea's line in less than two minutes.]]

==The Battle continues==
By now the Thousand Sons had gotten their shit together and began counter attacking. With the help of their psychic powers, the Sons caught the Space Wolves off guard and inflicted heavy losses. Ahriman and the Scarab Occult even wiped out a large group of the furries. This happened across the city and soon the first defensive line was formed. Furthermore, Magister Khalophis of the Pyrae Sect went Pacific Rim and took control of the dormant Titan Canis Vertex and began raping the Space Wolves with large psychic fireballs. It looked like the line was holding.

But then things took a turn for the worst.

The Custodes arrived and started flexing on the Thousand Sons with their bling. To make matters worse, the Sisters of Silence made their presence known. Due to being [[blanks]], the Sisters had a devastating effect on the psychic Thousand Sons. While the Sons were able to eventually negate the Sisters' effect, Leman Russ had arrived and began teaching the Thousand Sons the way of rip and tear in person. Against a Primarch, the Sons stood no chance and skedaddled the fuck outta there.

Then things got even worse for the Thousand Sons.

The infamous Flesh Change, that had once threatened the Legion prior to the reunification with Magnus, decided to come back in force. Several Thousand Sons lost control of their powers and turned into [[Chaos Spawn|Chaos Spa- I mean... gribbly things]]. One Legionnaire's demise caused a pretty huge explosion which caught the Canis Vertex, causing it to overload and kill Khalophis with the feedback. It also toppled over and crushed a Pyramid. Understandably, the fact that several legionaries were turning into mutant creatures before their very eyes gave the Imperials hard evidence that the Thousand Sons had gone too deep with their sorcery and were truly damned. With their line in disarray, the Thousand Sons retreated to the Pyramid of Photep, Magnus's crib, and prepared to make a final stand.

==Endgame==
By now there were only 1,500 Thousand Son Astartes left (before the retconned number anyway) and Leman Russ was closing in with a force that vastly outnumbered the Thousand Sons. In the ensuing battle, the Space Wolves deployed the [[Wulfen]] which horrified the Thousand Sons that the Wolves would deploy such abominations (though in fairness to the Space Wolves, the Thousand Sons are hardly in a position to accuse anyone of having abominations). With the Wolves tearing through the their lines, things were looking grim for the Thousand Sons. But then Magnus finally got off his ass.

Magnus descended from his pyramid and began giving the fucking furries a piece of his mind, literally. His psychic powers caused havoc on the Imperials. He even killed tons of Space Wolves with a staring contest. He also took a minute to slow time and give Ahriman his book and some final instructions. Afterwards, he and Leman began some quality bonding time.

The duel between Magnus and Leman was very brutal. They fought each other alone, surrounded by onlookers shouting "Worldstar!" and recording the fight with their pict captures. Russ broke Magnus's horn nipples, Magnus set Leman's hair on fire and both bitch slapped each other. At one point, Magnus even stabbed his arm into Leman's chest and stabbed one of his hearts, but then Russ broke said arm. At the climax of the duel, Russ blindly lashed out and struck Magnus's only weakness; his eye. Blinded, Magnus was helpless as the wolf king picked him up and crashed him down over his knee, breaking his back with such force that those watching reacted like so [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hHE6isPjdY4]. However before Leman could finish him off, Magnus decided to ragequit and teleported himself, the Thousand Sons and Tizca to [[Sortiarius]], aka the Planet of the Sorcerers. The Imperials had won.

==Aftermath==
Once they had finished wiping out the remaining Prosperine citizens, the Space Wolves enacted an [[Exterminatus]] on Prospero and left it a dead world. In his act of teleporting himself and his Legion away, Magnus shattered his physical form and became the first Daemon Primarch. The Thousand Sons felt they had been betrayed by the Emperor and thus joined Horus's merry gang of traitors. They would also bear a massive hate boner for the Space Wolves (unsurprisingly, Magnus didn't feel like telling them it was all his fault [[Skub|(because it was entirely the fault of the Space Wolves that they committed so may war crimes (the Nuremberg Defense is not valid))]]), finally taking "revenge" during the Siege of Fenris. The flesh change increased and started ravaging the Legion again. However Ahriman managed to cure it with his Rubix Cube but at the same time turned most of the Legion to dust. Understandably annoyed, Magnus exiled Ahriman for his act of stupidity.

In conclusion, '''local Primarch ruins everything.'''

{{40k-Timeline}}

Burning of Prospero

2020-08-31T20:10:48Z

2A02:1811:5180:A200:EC3D:29FD:FA1D:618: /* The Attack Commences */

{{Infobox 40k Campaign
|title=The Battle of Prospero
|image=
|attacker= Imperial Censure Host
|defender= Thousand Sons
|commander1= The [[Primarch]] [[Leman Russ]], Constantine Valdor, Jenetia Krole
|commander2= The [[Primarch]] [[Magnus the Red]], [[Ahriman]]
|date=004.M31
|scale=Planetary
|theatre=[[Horus Heresy]]
|strength1= ~73,200 [[Space Wolves]], 5000 [[Sons of Horus]], 982 Custodians, 3000 [[Sisters of Silence]], over 54,000 human infantry from various regiments, 12 Battle Titans, 5 Psi-Titans, over 2000 Mechanicum Secutarii and Tech Adept staff.
|strength2= ~62,200 [[Thousand Sons]], the [[Prospero Spireguard|Prosperine Guard]] ''(~85,000 soldiers)'', Zhao-Arkhad Taghmata ''(~8000 warriors & automata)'', 12 Battle Titans, millions of citizen reservists
|casualties1= 49,000 total. 23,000 Space Wolves KIA and 23,000 Imperial Army KIA. Severe Custodes and Sisters of Silence casualties
|casualties2= Very heavy. 90% of the Thousand Sons KIA. 30 million Prosperine Spireguard and civilians wiped out
|status= Pyrrhic Space Wolf victory
|outcome= Razing of Prospero, withdrawal of the Thousand Sons to Sortiarius and the sundering of Magnus the Red.
}}
The '''Burning of Prospero''' was the entirely avoidable full scale invasion and destruction of Prospero, homeworld of the [[Thousand Sons]], by the [[Space Wolves]]. Also involved were the Custodes, Sisters of Silence, Titans, Mechanicum, Imperial Army and, for some reason, 5000 Sons of Horus. This battle was pretty significant in that this was the first time that an Astartes Legion fought another Legion (well maybe not the [[Primarch#Two Missing Primarchs|first time]]). It was also one of the first battles of the Horus Heresy.

==How Did This Happen?==
The Burning of Prospero had it's roots in the [[Council of Nikaea]] where the [[God-Emperor of Mankind|Emperor]] personally declared that [[Librarians]] and psychic powers were so last millennium and banned the Legions from using them. In a way, the Council was also the trial of [[Magnus the Red]], Primarch of the Thousand Sons, for he was accused of sorcery and dabbling with the warp when he had sworn not to. There was also a deep distrust of psykers which did make things a bit biased. Anyway the result of Council results in Librarians and the use of psychic powers were banned in the Legions. This caused a problem for the Thousand Sons who made extensive use of psychic powers in their conquests. So they did the most logical thing, ignore the ruling and continue messing around with the Warp. Nothing could go wrong.

==Things go wrong==
During his meditations, Magnus saw a vision where [[Horus]] turned against the Emperor and cause a giant civil war. Failing to stop Horus from turning traitor due to interference from [[Erebus|this piece of shit]], Magnus decided to use sorcery to call the Emperor and warn him. By doing this he could personally deliver the news to Big E and also prove just how essential psychic powers were (and validate the use of sorcery). Unfortunately, this fucked things up tremendously, as Magnus's phone call breached through psychic barriers of the Webway and allowed [[Daemons|friendly little critters]] to enter the Imperial Palace and start causing mischief. So not only had Magnus wrecked the Emperor's Webway Project but he had also broken the Edict of Nikaea which pissed the Emperor off to no ends, he banished Magnus from sight and ignored his warnings about Horus.
[[File:Prospero.jpg|500px|thumb|left|Russ and his legion cleanse Prospero.]]
Back on Prospero, Magnus realized that he had been manipulated by a [[Tzeentch|giant demon cuttlefish]] and saw how he had not only screwed over himself, but the Imperium as well. He decided to stop fucking things up and just waited passively for the retribution that was sure to come instead of doing any number of things. Like trying to talk to the [[Leman Russ|guy who was sent to get him]], who actually did try communicating with Magnus to find out what happened. (Magnus just refused to talk to him, although whether Russ would have believed Horus going full heretic is another bag of dicks). He also decided to hide any knowledge of the incoming Imperial Forces from the Thousand Sons so they wouldn't fight back and ruin their chance for redemption (the worst fucking idea in the world as it had the opposite effect). He also covered Prospero under a psychic shield that blocked astropathic communications and prevented the Legion Corvidae Sect from foreseeing the attack. Finally, he sent the Thousand Sons Fleet away from Prospero on some hidden mission.

Magnus wasn't wrong about incoming punishment as the Emperor decided that Magnus had broken the law and ordered [[Leman Russ]], Primarch of the [[Space Wolves]], to go arrest his brother and bring him back so the Emperor could spank his red ass. Unfortunately Horus, who had indeed turned traitor, intercepted the orders and changed the "arrest" to "kill" Magnus and the Thousand Sons, convincing Leman that trying to arrest Mr Strawberry would be a waste of time. Leman, who was never a fan of Magnus and his sorcery, agreed at the time.

To accompany the Space Wolves, the Emperor sent along Custodes, Sisters of Silence, some Imperial Army Regiments, 5 Psi Titans and a couple Mechanicum Taghmata. Horus also sent 5000 Sons of Horus and 12 Titans of the Legio Mortis. Constantin Valdor also came along, just to make sure everything went as planned.

The Imperial Fleet reached Prospero, which was still unaware of the incoming attack. Before beginning the attack, Russ tried to contact Magnus one last time to request he send away the civilians and surrender peacefully, as the order to kill him didn't sit right with hindsight, and independently he decided it would be a better idea to arrest his brother and figure out what happened. Magnus refused to answer his calls and thanks to Magnus' efforts, nobody else was able to communicate with the Thousand Sons, so after trying for a while and getting really pissed off, Leman ordered the attack to begin.

==The Attack Commences==
As Prospero had no fleet defending it, it only had the orbital defense batteries as protection. These batteries lasted mere moments against the Imperial Fleet. Once the last of the batteries were destroyed, the Imperials commenced an orbital bombardment on Prospero with magma bombs and mass drivers. The planet got fucked up so badly that moments after the bombardment started, Tizca, capital of Prospero, was the only population center left standing. This was because a group of sorcerers belong to the Raptora Sect managed to cast a psychic shield over the city. The Space Wolves kept bombarding the shield in an effort to overload it which gave the Thousand Sons commanders time to figure out what the fuck was going on. With Magnus being [[Corvus Corax|emo]], Chief Librarian [[Ahzek Ahriman]] took command and decided that if the Thousand Sons were going down then they were going to go down fighting.

With the bombardment proving ineffective against the psychic shield, Russ led his Legion down onto the planet. Deploying in assault boats of such numbers, the people of Tizca mistook the incoming wave for a large dust cloud. In their arrogance, the Thousand Sons hadn't bothered to put any anti-air defenses in Tizca so the Space Wolves had little problem deploying. The Prospero Spireguard and Tizcan Militia managed to finally respond and set up defensive positions. The Palatine Guard set up at the edge of the Space Wolves's deployment zone where their commander, Katon Aphea, positioned them with his tactical brilliance, ready to meet the invaders.

[[fail|Leman Russ and the Space Wolves overran Aphea's line in less than two minutes.]]

==The Battle continues==
By now the Thousand Sons had gotten their shit together and began counter attacking. With the help of their psychic powers, the Sons caught the Space Wolves off guard and inflicted heavy losses. Ahriman and the Scarab Occult even wiped out a large group of the furries. This happened across the city and soon the first defensive line was formed. Furthermore, Magister Khalophis of the Pyrae Sect went Pacific Rim and took control of the dormant Titan Canis Vertex and began raping the Space Wolves with large psychic fireballs. It looked like the line was holding.

But then things took a turn for the worst.

The Custodes arrived and started flexing on the Thousand Sons with their bling. To make matters worse, the Sisters of Silence made their presence known. Due to being [[blanks]], the Sisters had a devastating effect on the psychic Thousand Sons. While the Sons were able to eventually negate the Sisters' effect, Leman Russ had arrived and began teaching the Thousand Sons the way of rip and tear. Against a Primarch, the Sons stood no chance and skedaddled the fuck outta there.

Then things got even worse for the Thousand Sons.

The infamous Flesh Change, that had once threatened the Legion prior to the reunification with Magnus, decided to come back in force. Several Thousand Sons lost control of their powers and turned into [[Chaos Spawn|Chaos Spa- I mean... gribbly things]]. One Legionnaire's demise caused a pretty huge explosion which caught the Canis Vertex, causing it to overload and kill Khalophis with the feedback. It also toppled over and crushed a Pyramid. Understandably, the fact that several legionaries were turning into mutant creatures before their very eyes gave the Imperials hard evidence that the Thousand Sons had gone too deep with their sorcery and were truly damned. With their line in disarray, the Thousand Sons retreated to the Pyramid of Photep, Magnus's crib, and prepared to make a final stand.

==Endgame==
By now there were only 1,500 Thousand Son Astartes left (before the retconned number anyway) and Leman Russ was closing in with a force that vastly outnumbered the Thousand Sons. In the ensuing battle, the Space Wolves deployed the [[Wulfen]] which horrified the Thousand Sons that the Wolves would deploy such abominations (though in fairness to the Space Wolves, the Thousand Sons are hardly in a position to accuse anyone of having abominations). With the Wolves tearing through the their lines, things were looking grim for the Thousand Sons. But then Magnus finally got off his ass.

Magnus descended from his pyramid and began giving the fucking furries a piece of his mind, literally. His psychic powers caused havoc on the Imperials. He even killed tons of Space Wolves with a staring contest. He also took a minute to slow time and give Ahriman his book and some final instructions. Afterwards, he and Leman began some quality bonding time.

The duel between Magnus and Leman was very brutal. They fought each other alone, surrounded by onlookers shouting "Worldstar!" and recording the fight with their pict captures. Russ broke Magnus's horn nipples, Magnus set Leman's hair on fire and both bitch slapped each other. At one point, Magnus even stabbed his arm into Leman's chest and stabbed one of his hearts, but then Russ broke said arm. At the climax of the duel, Russ blindly lashed out and struck Magnus's only weakness; his eye. Blinded, Magnus was helpless as the wolf king picked him up and crashed him down over his knee, breaking his back with such force that those watching reacted like so [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hHE6isPjdY4]. However before Leman could finish him off, Magnus decided to ragequit and teleported himself, the Thousand Sons and Tizca to [[Sortiarius]], aka the Planet of the Sorcerers. The Imperials had won.

==Aftermath==
Once they had finished wiping out the remaining Prosperine citizens, the Space Wolves enacted an [[Exterminatus]] on Prospero and left it a dead world. In his act of teleporting himself and his Legion away, Magnus shattered his physical form and became the first Daemon Primarch. The Thousand Sons felt they had been betrayed by the Emperor and thus joined Horus's merry gang of traitors. They would also bear a massive hate boner for the Space Wolves (unsurprisingly, Magnus didn't feel like telling them it was all his fault [[Skub|(because it was entirely the fault of the Space Wolves that they committed so may war crimes (the Nuremberg Defense is not valid))]]), finally taking "revenge" during the Siege of Fenris. The flesh change increased and started ravaging the Legion again. However Ahriman managed to cure it with his Rubix Cube but at the same time turned most of the Legion to dust. Understandably annoyed, Magnus exiled Ahriman for his act of stupidity.

In conclusion, '''local Primarch ruins everything.'''

{{40k-Timeline}}

Burning of Prospero

2020-08-31T20:09:46Z

2A02:1811:5180:A200:EC3D:29FD:FA1D:618: /* Things go wrong */

{{Infobox 40k Campaign
|title=The Battle of Prospero
|image=
|attacker= Imperial Censure Host
|defender= Thousand Sons
|commander1= The [[Primarch]] [[Leman Russ]], Constantine Valdor, Jenetia Krole
|commander2= The [[Primarch]] [[Magnus the Red]], [[Ahriman]]
|date=004.M31
|scale=Planetary
|theatre=[[Horus Heresy]]
|strength1= ~73,200 [[Space Wolves]], 5000 [[Sons of Horus]], 982 Custodians, 3000 [[Sisters of Silence]], over 54,000 human infantry from various regiments, 12 Battle Titans, 5 Psi-Titans, over 2000 Mechanicum Secutarii and Tech Adept staff.
|strength2= ~62,200 [[Thousand Sons]], the [[Prospero Spireguard|Prosperine Guard]] ''(~85,000 soldiers)'', Zhao-Arkhad Taghmata ''(~8000 warriors & automata)'', 12 Battle Titans, millions of citizen reservists
|casualties1= 49,000 total. 23,000 Space Wolves KIA and 23,000 Imperial Army KIA. Severe Custodes and Sisters of Silence casualties
|casualties2= Very heavy. 90% of the Thousand Sons KIA. 30 million Prosperine Spireguard and civilians wiped out
|status= Pyrrhic Space Wolf victory
|outcome= Razing of Prospero, withdrawal of the Thousand Sons to Sortiarius and the sundering of Magnus the Red.
}}
The '''Burning of Prospero''' was the entirely avoidable full scale invasion and destruction of Prospero, homeworld of the [[Thousand Sons]], by the [[Space Wolves]]. Also involved were the Custodes, Sisters of Silence, Titans, Mechanicum, Imperial Army and, for some reason, 5000 Sons of Horus. This battle was pretty significant in that this was the first time that an Astartes Legion fought another Legion (well maybe not the [[Primarch#Two Missing Primarchs|first time]]). It was also one of the first battles of the Horus Heresy.

==How Did This Happen?==
The Burning of Prospero had it's roots in the [[Council of Nikaea]] where the [[God-Emperor of Mankind|Emperor]] personally declared that [[Librarians]] and psychic powers were so last millennium and banned the Legions from using them. In a way, the Council was also the trial of [[Magnus the Red]], Primarch of the Thousand Sons, for he was accused of sorcery and dabbling with the warp when he had sworn not to. There was also a deep distrust of psykers which did make things a bit biased. Anyway the result of Council results in Librarians and the use of psychic powers were banned in the Legions. This caused a problem for the Thousand Sons who made extensive use of psychic powers in their conquests. So they did the most logical thing, ignore the ruling and continue messing around with the Warp. Nothing could go wrong.

==Things go wrong==
During his meditations, Magnus saw a vision where [[Horus]] turned against the Emperor and cause a giant civil war. Failing to stop Horus from turning traitor due to interference from [[Erebus|this piece of shit]], Magnus decided to use sorcery to call the Emperor and warn him. By doing this he could personally deliver the news to Big E and also prove just how essential psychic powers were (and validate the use of sorcery). Unfortunately, this fucked things up tremendously, as Magnus's phone call breached through psychic barriers of the Webway and allowed [[Daemons|friendly little critters]] to enter the Imperial Palace and start causing mischief. So not only had Magnus wrecked the Emperor's Webway Project but he had also broken the Edict of Nikaea which pissed the Emperor off to no ends, he banished Magnus from sight and ignored his warnings about Horus.
[[File:Prospero.jpg|500px|thumb|left|Russ and his legion cleanse Prospero.]]
Back on Prospero, Magnus realized that he had been manipulated by a [[Tzeentch|giant demon cuttlefish]] and saw how he had not only screwed over himself, but the Imperium as well. He decided to stop fucking things up and just waited passively for the retribution that was sure to come instead of doing any number of things. Like trying to talk to the [[Leman Russ|guy who was sent to get him]], who actually did try communicating with Magnus to find out what happened. (Magnus just refused to talk to him, although whether Russ would have believed Horus going full heretic is another bag of dicks). He also decided to hide any knowledge of the incoming Imperial Forces from the Thousand Sons so they wouldn't fight back and ruin their chance for redemption (the worst fucking idea in the world as it had the opposite effect). He also covered Prospero under a psychic shield that blocked astropathic communications and prevented the Legion Corvidae Sect from foreseeing the attack. Finally, he sent the Thousand Sons Fleet away from Prospero on some hidden mission.

Magnus wasn't wrong about incoming punishment as the Emperor decided that Magnus had broken the law and ordered [[Leman Russ]], Primarch of the [[Space Wolves]], to go arrest his brother and bring him back so the Emperor could spank his red ass. Unfortunately Horus, who had indeed turned traitor, intercepted the orders and changed the "arrest" to "kill" Magnus and the Thousand Sons, convincing Leman that trying to arrest Mr Strawberry would be a waste of time. Leman, who was never a fan of Magnus and his sorcery, agreed at the time.

To accompany the Space Wolves, the Emperor sent along Custodes, Sisters of Silence, some Imperial Army Regiments, 5 Psi Titans and a couple Mechanicum Taghmata. Horus also sent 5000 Sons of Horus and 12 Titans of the Legio Mortis. Constantin Valdor also came along, just to make sure everything went as planned.

The Imperial Fleet reached Prospero, which was still unaware of the incoming attack. Before beginning the attack, Russ tried to contact Magnus one last time to request he send away the civilians and surrender peacefully, as the order to kill him didn't sit right with hindsight, and independently he decided it would be a better idea to arrest his brother and figure out what happened. Magnus refused to answer his calls and thanks to Magnus' efforts, nobody else was able to communicate with the Thousand Sons, so after trying for a while and getting really pissed off, Leman ordered the attack to begin.

==The Attack Commences==
As Prospero had no fleet defending it, it only had the orbital defense batteries as protection. These batteries lasted mere moments against the Imperial Fleet. Once the last of the batteries were destroyed, the Imperials commenced an orbital bombardment on Prospero with magma bombs and mass drivers. The planet got fucked up so badly that moments after the bombardment started, Tizca, capital of Prospero, was the only population center left standing. This was because a group of sorcerers belong to the Raptora Sect managed to cast a psychic shield over the city. The Space Wolves kept bombarding the shield in an effort to overload it which gave the Thousand Sons commanders time to figure out what the fuck was going on. With Magnus being [[Corvus Corax|emo]], Chief Librarian [[Ahzek Ahriman]] took command and decided that if the Thousand Sons were going down then they were going to go down fighting.

With the bombardment proving ineffective against the shield, Lemon Rust led his Legion down onto the planet. Deploying in assault boats of such numbers, the people of Tizca mistook the incoming wave for a large dust cloud. In their arrogance, the Thousand Sons hadn't bothered to put any anti air defenses in Tizca so the Space Wolves had no problem deploying. The Prospero Spireguard and Tizcan Militia managed to finally respond and set up defensive positions. The Palatine Guard set up at the edge of the Space Wolves's deployment zone where their commander, Katon Aphea, positioned them with his tactical brilliance, ready to meet the invaders.

[[fail|Leman Russ and the Space Wolves overran Aphea's line in less than two minutes.]]

==The Battle continues==
By now the Thousand Sons had gotten their shit together and began counter attacking. With the help of their psychic powers, the Sons caught the Space Wolves off guard and inflicted heavy losses. Ahriman and the Scarab Occult even wiped out a large group of the furries. This happened across the city and soon the first defensive line was formed. Furthermore, Magister Khalophis of the Pyrae Sect went Pacific Rim and took control of the dormant Titan Canis Vertex and began raping the Space Wolves with large psychic fireballs. It looked like the line was holding.

But then things took a turn for the worst.

The Custodes arrived and started flexing on the Thousand Sons with their bling. To make matters worse, the Sisters of Silence made their presence known. Due to being [[blanks]], the Sisters had a devastating effect on the psychic Thousand Sons. While the Sons were able to eventually negate the Sisters' effect, Leman Russ had arrived and began teaching the Thousand Sons the way of rip and tear. Against a Primarch, the Sons stood no chance and skedaddled the fuck outta there.

Then things got even worse for the Thousand Sons.

The infamous Flesh Change, that had once threatened the Legion prior to the reunification with Magnus, decided to come back in force. Several Thousand Sons lost control of their powers and turned into [[Chaos Spawn|Chaos Spa- I mean... gribbly things]]. One Legionnaire's demise caused a pretty huge explosion which caught the Canis Vertex, causing it to overload and kill Khalophis with the feedback. It also toppled over and crushed a Pyramid. Understandably, the fact that several legionaries were turning into mutant creatures before their very eyes gave the Imperials hard evidence that the Thousand Sons had gone too deep with their sorcery and were truly damned. With their line in disarray, the Thousand Sons retreated to the Pyramid of Photep, Magnus's crib, and prepared to make a final stand.

==Endgame==
By now there were only 1,500 Thousand Son Astartes left (before the retconned number anyway) and Leman Russ was closing in with a force that vastly outnumbered the Thousand Sons. In the ensuing battle, the Space Wolves deployed the [[Wulfen]] which horrified the Thousand Sons that the Wolves would deploy such abominations (though in fairness to the Space Wolves, the Thousand Sons are hardly in a position to accuse anyone of having abominations). With the Wolves tearing through the their lines, things were looking grim for the Thousand Sons. But then Magnus finally got off his ass.

Magnus descended from his pyramid and began giving the fucking furries a piece of his mind, literally. His psychic powers caused havoc on the Imperials. He even killed tons of Space Wolves with a staring contest. He also took a minute to slow time and give Ahriman his book and some final instructions. Afterwards, he and Leman began some quality bonding time.

The duel between Magnus and Leman was very brutal. They fought each other alone, surrounded by onlookers shouting "Worldstar!" and recording the fight with their pict captures. Russ broke Magnus's horn nipples, Magnus set Leman's hair on fire and both bitch slapped each other. At one point, Magnus even stabbed his arm into Leman's chest and stabbed one of his hearts, but then Russ broke said arm. At the climax of the duel, Russ blindly lashed out and struck Magnus's only weakness; his eye. Blinded, Magnus was helpless as the wolf king picked him up and crashed him down over his knee, breaking his back with such force that those watching reacted like so [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hHE6isPjdY4]. However before Leman could finish him off, Magnus decided to ragequit and teleported himself, the Thousand Sons and Tizca to [[Sortiarius]], aka the Planet of the Sorcerers. The Imperials had won.

==Aftermath==
Once they had finished wiping out the remaining Prosperine citizens, the Space Wolves enacted an [[Exterminatus]] on Prospero and left it a dead world. In his act of teleporting himself and his Legion away, Magnus shattered his physical form and became the first Daemon Primarch. The Thousand Sons felt they had been betrayed by the Emperor and thus joined Horus's merry gang of traitors. They would also bear a massive hate boner for the Space Wolves (unsurprisingly, Magnus didn't feel like telling them it was all his fault [[Skub|(because it was entirely the fault of the Space Wolves that they committed so may war crimes (the Nuremberg Defense is not valid))]]), finally taking "revenge" during the Siege of Fenris. The flesh change increased and started ravaging the Legion again. However Ahriman managed to cure it with his Rubix Cube but at the same time turned most of the Legion to dust. Understandably annoyed, Magnus exiled Ahriman for his act of stupidity.

In conclusion, '''local Primarch ruins everything.'''

{{40k-Timeline}}

Burning of Prospero

2020-08-31T20:08:56Z

2A02:1811:5180:A200:EC3D:29FD:FA1D:618: /* Things go wrong */

{{Infobox 40k Campaign
|title=The Battle of Prospero
|image=
|attacker= Imperial Censure Host
|defender= Thousand Sons
|commander1= The [[Primarch]] [[Leman Russ]], Constantine Valdor, Jenetia Krole
|commander2= The [[Primarch]] [[Magnus the Red]], [[Ahriman]]
|date=004.M31
|scale=Planetary
|theatre=[[Horus Heresy]]
|strength1= ~73,200 [[Space Wolves]], 5000 [[Sons of Horus]], 982 Custodians, 3000 [[Sisters of Silence]], over 54,000 human infantry from various regiments, 12 Battle Titans, 5 Psi-Titans, over 2000 Mechanicum Secutarii and Tech Adept staff.
|strength2= ~62,200 [[Thousand Sons]], the [[Prospero Spireguard|Prosperine Guard]] ''(~85,000 soldiers)'', Zhao-Arkhad Taghmata ''(~8000 warriors & automata)'', 12 Battle Titans, millions of citizen reservists
|casualties1= 49,000 total. 23,000 Space Wolves KIA and 23,000 Imperial Army KIA. Severe Custodes and Sisters of Silence casualties
|casualties2= Very heavy. 90% of the Thousand Sons KIA. 30 million Prosperine Spireguard and civilians wiped out
|status= Pyrrhic Space Wolf victory
|outcome= Razing of Prospero, withdrawal of the Thousand Sons to Sortiarius and the sundering of Magnus the Red.
}}
The '''Burning of Prospero''' was the entirely avoidable full scale invasion and destruction of Prospero, homeworld of the [[Thousand Sons]], by the [[Space Wolves]]. Also involved were the Custodes, Sisters of Silence, Titans, Mechanicum, Imperial Army and, for some reason, 5000 Sons of Horus. This battle was pretty significant in that this was the first time that an Astartes Legion fought another Legion (well maybe not the [[Primarch#Two Missing Primarchs|first time]]). It was also one of the first battles of the Horus Heresy.

==How Did This Happen?==
The Burning of Prospero had it's roots in the [[Council of Nikaea]] where the [[God-Emperor of Mankind|Emperor]] personally declared that [[Librarians]] and psychic powers were so last millennium and banned the Legions from using them. In a way, the Council was also the trial of [[Magnus the Red]], Primarch of the Thousand Sons, for he was accused of sorcery and dabbling with the warp when he had sworn not to. There was also a deep distrust of psykers which did make things a bit biased. Anyway the result of Council results in Librarians and the use of psychic powers were banned in the Legions. This caused a problem for the Thousand Sons who made extensive use of psychic powers in their conquests. So they did the most logical thing, ignore the ruling and continue messing around with the Warp. Nothing could go wrong.

==Things go wrong==
During his meditations, Magnus saw a vision where [[Horus]] turned against the Emperor and cause a giant civil war. Failing to stop Horus from turning traitor due to interference from [[Erebus|this piece of shit]], Magnus decided to use sorcery to call the Emperor and warn him. By doing this he could personally deliver the news to Big E and also prove just how essential psychic powers were (and validate the use of sorcery). Unfortunately, this fucked things up tremendously, as Magnus's phone call breached through psychic barriers of the Webway and allowed [[Daemons|friendly little critters]] to enter the Imperial Palace and start causing mischief. So not only had Magnus wrecked the Emperor's Webway Project but he had also broken the Edict of Nikaea which pissed the Emperor off to no ends, he banished Magnus from sight and ignored his warnings about Horus.
[[File:Prospero.jpg|500px|thumb|left|Russ and his legion cleanse Prospero.]]
Back on Prospero, Magnus realized that he had been manipulated by a [[Tzeentch|giant demon cuttlefish]] and saw how he had not only screwed over himself, but the Imperium as well. He decided to stop fucking things up and just waited passively for the retribution that was sure to come instead of doing any number of things. Like trying to talk to the [[Leman Russ|guy who was sent to get him]], who actually did try communicating with Magnus to find out what happened. (Magnus just refused to talk to him, although whether Russ would have believed horus going full heretic is another bag of dicks). He also decided to hide any knowledge of the incoming Imperial Forces from the Thousand Sons so they wouldn't fight back and ruin their chance for redemption (the worst fucking idea in the world as it had the opposite effect). He also covered Prospero under a psychic shield that blocked astropathic communications and prevented the Legion Corvidae Sect from foreseeing the attack. Finally, he sent the Thousand Sons Fleet away from Prospero on some hidden mission.

Magnus wasn't wrong about incoming punishment as the Emperor decided that Magnus had broken the law and ordered [[Leman Russ]], Primarch of the [[Space Wolves]], to go arrest his brother and bring him back so the Emperor could spank his red ass. Unfortunately Horus, who had indeed turned traitor, intercepted the orders and changed the "arrest" to "kill" Magnus and the Thousand Sons, convincing Leman that trying to arrest Mr Strawberry would be a waste of time. Leman, who was never a fan of Magnus and his sorcery, agreed at the time.

To accompany the Space Wolves, the Emperor sent along Custodes, Sisters of Silence, some Imperial Army Regiments, 5 Psi Titans and a couple Mechanicum Taghmata. Horus also sent 5000 Sons of Horus and 12 Titans of the Legio Mortis. Constantin Valdor also came along, just to make sure everything went as planned.

The Imperial Fleet reached Prospero, which was still unaware of the incoming attack. Before beginning the attack, Russ tried to contact Magnus one last time to request he send away the civilians and surrender peacefully, as the order to kill him didn't sit right with hindsight, and independently he decided it would be a better idea to arrest his brother and figure out what happened. Magnus refused to answer his calls and thanks to Magnus' efforts, nobody else was able to communicate with the Thousand Sons, so after trying for a while and getting really pissed off, Leman ordered the attack to begin.

==The Attack Commences==
As Prospero had no fleet defending it, it only had the orbital defense batteries as protection. These batteries lasted mere moments against the Imperial Fleet. Once the last of the batteries were destroyed, the Imperials commenced an orbital bombardment on Prospero with magma bombs and mass drivers. The planet got fucked up so badly that moments after the bombardment started, Tizca, capital of Prospero, was the only population center left standing. This was because a group of sorcerers belong to the Raptora Sect managed to cast a psychic shield over the city. The Space Wolves kept bombarding the shield in an effort to overload it which gave the Thousand Sons commanders time to figure out what the fuck was going on. With Magnus being [[Corvus Corax|emo]], Chief Librarian [[Ahzek Ahriman]] took command and decided that if the Thousand Sons were going down then they were going to go down fighting.

With the bombardment proving ineffective against the shield, Lemon Rust led his Legion down onto the planet. Deploying in assault boats of such numbers, the people of Tizca mistook the incoming wave for a large dust cloud. In their arrogance, the Thousand Sons hadn't bothered to put any anti air defenses in Tizca so the Space Wolves had no problem deploying. The Prospero Spireguard and Tizcan Militia managed to finally respond and set up defensive positions. The Palatine Guard set up at the edge of the Space Wolves's deployment zone where their commander, Katon Aphea, positioned them with his tactical brilliance, ready to meet the invaders.

[[fail|Leman Russ and the Space Wolves overran Aphea's line in less than two minutes.]]

==The Battle continues==
By now the Thousand Sons had gotten their shit together and began counter attacking. With the help of their psychic powers, the Sons caught the Space Wolves off guard and inflicted heavy losses. Ahriman and the Scarab Occult even wiped out a large group of the furries. This happened across the city and soon the first defensive line was formed. Furthermore, Magister Khalophis of the Pyrae Sect went Pacific Rim and took control of the dormant Titan Canis Vertex and began raping the Space Wolves with large psychic fireballs. It looked like the line was holding.

But then things took a turn for the worst.

The Custodes arrived and started flexing on the Thousand Sons with their bling. To make matters worse, the Sisters of Silence made their presence known. Due to being [[blanks]], the Sisters had a devastating effect on the psychic Thousand Sons. While the Sons were able to eventually negate the Sisters' effect, Leman Russ had arrived and began teaching the Thousand Sons the way of rip and tear. Against a Primarch, the Sons stood no chance and skedaddled the fuck outta there.

Then things got even worse for the Thousand Sons.

The infamous Flesh Change, that had once threatened the Legion prior to the reunification with Magnus, decided to come back in force. Several Thousand Sons lost control of their powers and turned into [[Chaos Spawn|Chaos Spa- I mean... gribbly things]]. One Legionnaire's demise caused a pretty huge explosion which caught the Canis Vertex, causing it to overload and kill Khalophis with the feedback. It also toppled over and crushed a Pyramid. Understandably, the fact that several legionaries were turning into mutant creatures before their very eyes gave the Imperials hard evidence that the Thousand Sons had gone too deep with their sorcery and were truly damned. With their line in disarray, the Thousand Sons retreated to the Pyramid of Photep, Magnus's crib, and prepared to make a final stand.

==Endgame==
By now there were only 1,500 Thousand Son Astartes left (before the retconned number anyway) and Leman Russ was closing in with a force that vastly outnumbered the Thousand Sons. In the ensuing battle, the Space Wolves deployed the [[Wulfen]] which horrified the Thousand Sons that the Wolves would deploy such abominations (though in fairness to the Space Wolves, the Thousand Sons are hardly in a position to accuse anyone of having abominations). With the Wolves tearing through the their lines, things were looking grim for the Thousand Sons. But then Magnus finally got off his ass.

Magnus descended from his pyramid and began giving the fucking furries a piece of his mind, literally. His psychic powers caused havoc on the Imperials. He even killed tons of Space Wolves with a staring contest. He also took a minute to slow time and give Ahriman his book and some final instructions. Afterwards, he and Leman began some quality bonding time.

The duel between Magnus and Leman was very brutal. They fought each other alone, surrounded by onlookers shouting "Worldstar!" and recording the fight with their pict captures. Russ broke Magnus's horn nipples, Magnus set Leman's hair on fire and both bitch slapped each other. At one point, Magnus even stabbed his arm into Leman's chest and stabbed one of his hearts, but then Russ broke said arm. At the climax of the duel, Russ blindly lashed out and struck Magnus's only weakness; his eye. Blinded, Magnus was helpless as the wolf king picked him up and crashed him down over his knee, breaking his back with such force that those watching reacted like so [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hHE6isPjdY4]. However before Leman could finish him off, Magnus decided to ragequit and teleported himself, the Thousand Sons and Tizca to [[Sortiarius]], aka the Planet of the Sorcerers. The Imperials had won.

==Aftermath==
Once they had finished wiping out the remaining Prosperine citizens, the Space Wolves enacted an [[Exterminatus]] on Prospero and left it a dead world. In his act of teleporting himself and his Legion away, Magnus shattered his physical form and became the first Daemon Primarch. The Thousand Sons felt they had been betrayed by the Emperor and thus joined Horus's merry gang of traitors. They would also bear a massive hate boner for the Space Wolves (unsurprisingly, Magnus didn't feel like telling them it was all his fault [[Skub|(because it was entirely the fault of the Space Wolves that they committed so may war crimes (the Nuremberg Defense is not valid))]]), finally taking "revenge" during the Siege of Fenris. The flesh change increased and started ravaging the Legion again. However Ahriman managed to cure it with his Rubix Cube but at the same time turned most of the Legion to dust. Understandably annoyed, Magnus exiled Ahriman for his act of stupidity.

In conclusion, '''local Primarch ruins everything.'''

{{40k-Timeline}}

Chaos Escort

2020-08-31T14:08:05Z

2A02:1811:5180:A200:EC3D:29FD:FA1D:618: couldn't resist making the joke

''(This article is about the starships in a Chaos void fleet. For the other type of Chaos escort, look [[Daemonette|here]].)''

The smallest and most common type of warship available, '''Chaos Escorts''' are lightly armed and armored, but compensate for this by being extremely fast and manoeuvrable. As their designation suggests, they often accompany larger ships during fleet actions, screening them against torpedo attacks or enemy escorts.

In the [[Fleets of Chaos]], Escorts normally act as raiders, penetrating deep into Imperial Space to prey on vulnerable supply ships and transports. Weak individually, such Raiders group up in squadrons for both mutual protection.

Since Chaos fleets are generally very heavy on the Cruiser and rarely have anything between escort and capital ship, they wisely (wisdom should be Chaos heresy) have pretty powerful escorts for their size and cheap enough to come in ridiculously vast numbers. Pretty good at countering Imperial torpedo spam, too. Or rival Chaos fleets' attack craft.

Escorts fall under two broad types: the much larger ''Raider'', which is better-armed and protected, and the smaller ''Destroyer'', which is a lot nimbler and faster.

==Destroyers==
===Ordnance-boat===

====Iconoclast====

[[File:BFGAIconoclast.jpg|300px|thumb|right|Waaaay too common]]

A constant peril to shipping, roving squadrons of these Destroyers are a regular part of pirate fleets. Weak on their own, this is normally compensated by sheer numbers, and enough Destroyers working together can even bring down a Cruiser. Other than swarm tactics, they are usually seen engaging enemy escorts, destroying attack craft, and shooting down incoming torpedoes.

The Iconoclast itself is armed by a short-ranged Weapons Battery turret. Sooo...what are those tubes on the sides for if not guns or torpedoes? Chaos, that’s what. Being crazy-stupid for its own sake. Lore-wise it is actually a well-armed ship.

...This ship does look pretty cool, though. Rogue Traders like it.

*'''Length:''' 1.3km
*'''Mass:''' 6.1 megatonnes approx
*'''Crew:''' 16,500 crew, approx
*'''Acceleration:''' 7.2 gravities max sustainable acceleration
==Raiders==
===Basic===
====Infidel====
[[File:BFGAInfidel.jpg|300px|thumb|right|Underestimate at your own peril.]]
[[Meme|ALLAHU AKBAR!]]

Jokes aside, originating from the Monsk orbital shipyards, this was meant to replace the ''Cobra''-class Destroyer, the [[Blood Ravens|designs were found to have been stolen.]] A few years later, ships bearing the same description were reported to be attacking Imperial supply convoys. As a result of this, the class was redesignated as the '''Infidel'''.

Imperial efforts to reconstruct the stolen plans resulted in the development of the Falchion Escort class. In 938 or 939.M41, the two "sister" classes (the Falchion and the Infidel) would confront each other for the first time in a naval battle over Sabatine.

The Infidel is armed with front Torpedo tubes, as well as a short-ranged Weapons Battery in front.

*'''Length:''' 1.8-2km; approx

===Lance-boat===
====Idolator====

[[File:BFGAIdolator.jpg|300px|thumb|right|Your guess on the nature of these prongs are as good as mine.]]

A giant tuning fork with rocket engines.

Said to be the product of the [[Dark Mechanicus]] [[Forge World]] of Xana II, the '''Idolator'''-class Raider incorporate features and systems of possibly [[Heresy|xenos origin.]] These ships were also infamous for their incredible long-ranged gunnery, which points to a targeting system that the [[Adeptus Mechanicus]] cannot readily duplicate.

It is easily identifiable for its bizarre prong-shaped prow. Don't ask us why the forces of Chaos like to stick four flimsy-looking prongs at the front of their ship, it is not like it is reinforced to withstand a ram like their Imperial counterparts.

The Idolator is armed with a short-ranged front-facing [[Lance]] battery as well as a mid-ranged Weapons Battery.

*'''Length:''' 1.8-2km; approx

==In Battlefleet Gothic==

The cheapest and smallest ship type available, the Escorts are also some of the fastest and agile ships available. There is no limit to the number of Escorts that can be included in a list except points, so use them to round of a fleet.

That aside, use Escorts to screen your much more expensive units from Ordinance or Torpedoes, or harass isolated ships.

==In Battlefleet Gothic: Armada 1 & 2==

Much like their counterparts on the tabletop, Escorts are cheap and quick ships. Aside from their obvious role as Torpedo screens for much more expensive vessels, they've also been used as scouts and spotters.
{{40k-Chaos-Ships}}
[[Category:Warhammer 40,000]]
[[Category:Battlefleet Gothic]]
[[Category:Fleets of Chaos]]
[[Category:Chaos]]

AH-64 Apache Attack Helicopter

2020-08-31T14:02:06Z

2A02:1811:5180:A200:EC3D:29FD:FA1D:618: /* In Team Yankee */

[[File:TUBX21-03.jpg|300px|right|thumb|]]
[[File:TUBX21-10.jpg|300px|right|thumb|Longbow]]

{{topquote|Now if there's one thing you can be sure of, it's that nothing is more powerful than a young boy's wish. Except an Apache helicopter. An Apache helicopter has machine guns AND missiles. It is an unbelievably impressive complement of weaponry, an absolute death machine.|Sir Patrick Stewart from the film Ted.}}

You know it, you love it. Whether your a gamer, ever seen a few modern war films or just a military buff you should already know what it is. It's the fucking Apache helicopter in service of American (Boeing), British (AgustaWestland) and Israel Armed armed forces. Though Israel adopted them in 1990 and the Brits in 2004. It is currently fielded by at least seventeen nations. Obviously no Apache for anyone except America in Team Yankee. Nor anyone else who bought them long after 1986 for that matter. Unless Gale Force Nine wants to go full crazy for their alternate history game or wants some extra cash.

==In Team Yankee==
[[File:TUBX21-19.jpg|300px|left|thumb|Stats]]

As helicopters go, the Apache is a frightening beast. Along with Thermal Imaging, it has a 'take-all-comers' loadout of:
* Hellfire ATGMS and their 25 AT that will make short work of any tank it can get its sights on while it hovers well out of the range of AA.
* for infantry or soft vehicles (or if another helo tries to get rowdy), there's your M230 with ROF 6 AP 8 if you hover. I pity the non-armored fool that thing is pointed at...
* In case of artillery parking spot, once per game you can drop an AT4 Salvo onto their top armor of mostly zero. Not a sure kill, but it certainly will hurt a lot.

Like all NATO helo's it has the Hunter Killer special rule: use terrain as concealment and unless you fire, you're concealed and only being hit on a roll of 6+.

As is mostly the case with such units, the downside is cost: two Apaches will hurt you for 9, the full platoon of four for 18. They're expensive, but just like the [[AH-1 Cobra Attack Helicopter|Cobra]], in the right conditions they'll murder the hell out of any Soviet that has the misfortune of being in front of them.

==IRL==
[[File:XTuRieTnpjFpEk9TLTDKDGdM 2IsnouZtvvRKfKL8hE.jpg|300px|right|thumb| *insert your favorite early to mid 90s metal song here*]]

The Boeing AH-64 Apache strangely enough, shares its origins with the [[A-10 Warthog]]. Because USAF flyboys like to play fast and loose with the CAS mission [[derp|and believe every problem on the ground can be solved with strategic bombing.]] In the 1970s, Lockheed's compound helicopter the AH-56 Cheyenne made chair force generals shit their collective panties. As it would make them irrelevant and look bigger idiots than they already were.(see Century Series fighters, F-111 and lack of a gun on the F-4) This forced them to stop thumbing their noses at the Fighter Mafia's CAS proposal. Having no choice but to adopt Warthog in order to force the Army to can the AH-56.

The Army got what they wanted and than issued an RFP for a conventional Attack Helicopter. In 1975 Boeing's YAH-64 won the contract over Bell's YAH-63. The first combat mission was George HW Bush's illegal invasion of Panama. While the real test of the Apache's effectiveness came during the Gulf War. Out of 277, only one AH-64 was shot down during Desert Storm via a close range RPG. The only real issues the army experienced were logistics and workload. During operation Allied Force in 1999 other problems also cropped up. Since post 2000 variants don't have those issues. It was obviously due to the inferior tools, technology and training of the day.
The Apache biggest successes were during the Afghan and Iraq Wars. Many of the choppers that were shot down were eventually restored to working order.

The typical armament of the AH-64 is the M230 30mm Chaingun. A huge pain in the ass to reload. It can mount Hydra 70, CRV7 or APKWS rockets. Missile options consist of AGM-114 Hellfire, AIM-92 Stingers(obviously the A2A version of FIM-92) or Spike Missiles. Which is something the US Army adopted as an interim solution. Obviously because of America's Military Industrial Complex incompetence. The AH-64D Longbow variant has additional hardpoints for A2A Stingers.
The most significant upgrade is the AH-64E Guardian. Allowing the gunner to control RQ-7 Shadow or MQ-1C Grey Eagle drones for recon or additional firepower.

Proposed upgrades for the Apache are a laser weapon system(likely as an upgrade from the M230 because again reloading it sucks ass) and replacing the tail fan with a pusher propeller. The latter which will increase its speed to 185 knots and range to 460 NMI. From 158 knots and 257 NMI respectively. If the AH-64E Block 2 Compound were adopted it would be the ultimate irony. As the AH-56 Cheyenne the USAF whined about was one of the earliest compound helicopters. It would be Army metaphorically poking the flyboys in the eye with one hand while flipping the bird in the other.

The Apache will mostly likely serve along side and eventually be replaced with the Sikorsky–Boeing SB1-Defiant by the US Army in the 2030s. Another Compound Helicopter like the Cheyenne. The Defiant is the contract winner of the Future Vertical Lift program alongside the Bell V-280 Valor. A tiltrotor aircraft more advanced than the V-22 Osprey.

{{US Forces in Team Yankee}}

AH-64 Apache Attack Helicopter

2020-08-31T11:14:15Z

2A02:1811:5180:A200:EC3D:29FD:FA1D:618: L2topquote

[[File:TUBX21-03.jpg|300px|right|thumb|]]
[[File:TUBX21-10.jpg|300px|right|thumb|Longbow]]

{{topquote|Now if there's one thing you can be sure of, it's that nothing is more powerful than a young boy's wish. Except an Apache helicopter. An Apache helicopter has machine guns AND missiles. It is an unbelievably impressive complement of weaponry, an absolute death machine.|Sir Patrick Stewart from the film Ted.}}

You know it, you love it. Whether your a gamer, ever seen a few modern war films or just a military buff you should already know what it is. It's the fucking Apache helicopter in service of American (Boeing), British (AgustaWestland) and Israel Armed armed forces. Though Israel adopted them in 1990 and the Brits in 2004. It is currently fielded by at least seventeen nations. Obviously no Apache for anyone except America in Team Yankee. Nor anyone else who bought them long after 1986 for that matter. Unless Gale Force Nine wants to go full crazy for their alternate history game or wants some extra cash.

==In Team Yankee==
[[File:TUBX21-19.jpg|300px|left|thumb|Stats]]

{{clear}}

==IRL==
[[File:XTuRieTnpjFpEk9TLTDKDGdM 2IsnouZtvvRKfKL8hE.jpg|300px|right|thumb| *insert your favorite early to mid 90s metal song here*]]

The Boeing AH-64 Apache strangely enough, shares its origins with the [[A-10 Warthog]]. Because USAF flyboys like to play fast and loose with the CAS mission [[derp|and believe every problem on the ground can be solved with strategic bombing.]] In the 1970s, Lockheed's compound helicopter the AH-56 Cheyenne made chair force generals shit their collective panties. As it would make them irrelevant and look bigger idiots than they already were.(see Century Series fighters, F-111 and lack of a gun on the F-4) This forced them to stop thumbing their noses at the Fighter Mafia's CAS proposal. Having no choice but to adopt Warthog in order to force the Army to can the AH-56.

The Army got what they wanted and than issued an RFP for a conventional Attack Helicopter. In 1975 Boeing's YAH-64 won the contract over Bell's YAH-63. The first combat mission was George HW Bush's illegal invasion of Panama. While the real test of the Apache's effectiveness came during the Gulf War. Out of 277, only one AH-64 was shot down during Desert Storm via a close range RPG. The only real issues the army experienced were logistics and workload. During operation Allied Force in 1999 other problems also cropped up. Since post 2000 variants don't have those issues. It was obviously due to the inferior tools, technology and training of the day.
The Apache biggest successes were during the Afghan and Iraq Wars. Many of the choppers that were shot down were eventually restored to working order.

The typical armament of the AH-64 is the M230 30mm Chaingun. A huge pain in the ass to reload. It can mount Hydra 70, CRV7 or APKWS rockets. Missile options consist of AGM-114 Hellfire, AIM-92 Stingers(obviously the A2A version of FIM-92) or Spike Missiles. Which is something the US Army adopted as an interim solution. Obviously because of America's Military Industrial Complex incompetence. The AH-64D Longbow variant has additional hardpoints for A2A Stingers.
The most significant upgrade is the AH-64E Guardian. Allowing the gunner to control RQ-7 Shadow or MQ-1C Grey Eagle drones for recon or additional firepower.

Proposed upgrades for the Apache are a laser weapon system(likely as an upgrade from the M230 because again reloading it sucks ass) and replacing the tail fan with a pusher propeller. The latter which will increase its speed to 185 knots and range to 460 NMI. From 158 knots and 257 NMI respectively. If the AH-64E Block 2 Compound were adopted it would be the ultimate irony. As the AH-56 Cheyenne the USAF whined about was one of the earliest compound helicopters. It would be Army metaphorically poking the flyboys in the eye with one hand while flipping the bird in the other.

The Apache will mostly likely serve along side and eventually be replaced with the Sikorsky–Boeing SB1-Defiant by the US Army in the 2030s. Another Compound Helicopter like the Cheyenne. The Defiant is the contract winner of the Future Vertical Lift program alongside the Bell V-280 Valor. A tiltrotor aircraft more advanced than the V-22 Osprey.

{{US Forces in Team Yankee}}

Nassir Amit

2020-08-31T09:34:48Z

2A02:1811:5180:A200:EC3D:29FD:FA1D:618: clarification/typos

[[File:Temperusmaximus.jpg|400px|thumb|right|Anger management? Never heard of it.]]
'''Nassir Amit''' is a [[Space Marine]] that was first a [[Praetor|Captain]] in the [[Blood Angels]] Legion, then became the first [[Chapter Master]] of the [[Flesh Tearers]] during the [[Second Founding]]. He named his Chapter after his own nickname. He originally got said nickname from Khârn (of all people) when he saw how scary the dude was in the World Eaters' recreational gladiator pits, and just how generally bloodthirsty and angry he was even before the death of Sanguinius really made that a thing for all Blood Angels. Beyond being a predatory, hard as nails motherfucker, Amit was also a brutally honest warrior that hated deceit and having to lie about things, and unafraid to voice his opinions; [[skub|which made others either like him a bit and overlook his general brutality or hate him even more.]] His end was a truly sad one however. Although his deeds were great and many, and he led the Flesh Tearers to many victories, he sadly was overwhelmed by the Black Rage that completely consumed him.

He is basically the canon [[Angry Marine]] and the inspiration behind his /tg/-created counterpart [[Temperus Maximus]].

==Notable feats==
Nassir Amit is a bit of a sideshow character in the [[Horus Heresy]] novels, but he still managed to rack up some impressive accolades:
* He equipped his men with flaying knives instead of standard combat knives to make them even scarier.
* He was known to wear Terminator armour in battle, equipped with dual Chainfists with Storm Bolters mounted to the wrists, for optimal [[Rip and Tear]] capability.
* He earned his nickname from [[Khârn]] fighting [[World Eaters]] in their duelling pits. No holds barred duels to the death. And he won. Every. Last. One. He. Fought! (Though Khârn himself thought he could beat him... he’s probably trying his hand now.)
* He participated in the annihilation of the Nephilim along with his Primarch.
* He had no qualm about calling [[God-Emperor of Mankind|the Emperor's]] decision at Nikaea a stupid one (to the point [[Sanguinius]] had to kindly remind him the Emperor's word was law) and to offer asylum to any ex-Librarian in his company if their original one did not want them back. Not because he especially liked [[psyker]]s but because in his eyes it was a dick move and he wouldn't abide by dick moves.
**... The Emperor agrees with him on this now, but that probably has to do with [[Magnus The Red|Magnus]] falling to chaos.
*He showed the Alpha Legion how to eradicate [[Ork]]s properly in the Kayvas Belt.
*He was the first to realize (and dare voice) the existence of the [[Red Thirst]] and told Sanguinius straight-up that trying to cover that up was a mistake.
*He was the first to realize (and again dare voice) that Horus sent them into a trap in the Signus Cluster.
** Sanguinius (who up to that point was super-bro' with Horus) flat out backhanded him for this, and demanded he retract his statement... He didn’t because he’s just that ballsy.
*He was the first to realize (and yet again dare voice) that the [[Word Bearers]] had betrayed them.
**Very few were surprised by this prospect, unlike the situation with Horus.
*He has the dubious honour of being the first [[Blood Angel]] team-killing fucktard, succumbing to the [[Red Thirst]] and slaughtering a group of [[Space Wolves]] accompanying them in his fury.
**On the flip side, he volunteered to turn himself over to the Wolves and confess to said act and let them enact whatever retribution they wished upon him. Only [[Azkaellon]]'s concern about turning brother against brother even further made that a no-go, and he almost punched Azkaellon in the face for lying about the whole thing to Sanguinius. Whatever his flaws, the guy actually stood up for them!
**However this accidentally helped the Blood Angels by letting their Librarians use their powers without interference so ultimately this worked out.
* [[Awesome|He told Roboute Guilliman, to his face, that his Codex Astartes was a bad idea]]. Twice in a row! And [[butthurt|right after getting punched in the gut for saying it the first time]]. Amit would never forgive Guilliman for forcing the Codex upon everyone. Ever.
** Poetic irony: after waking up in the modern Imperium... Guilliman actually concurs. Amit’s probably laughing his ass off right now.
* He created the Reliquary of Amit, a container containing Sanguinius' last feather, suspended in stasis so it may never touch the ground, to express his sorrow over his Primarch's death. Being a bloodthirsty murder machine doesn't mean you can't weep manly tears.
* He was also old as fuck, as it was said that he personally declared Cretacia as the Flesh Tearers' homeworld despite the chapter being fleet-based for ''several millennia''. [[Dante]] probably doesn't hold a candle to him.
* He may be the only loyalist marine in the history of the Imperium to have been “gifted” [[Daemon Prince|apotheosis]], while still remaining loyal to the Imperium. That is the pinnacle of faith in the Emperor.
* He’s only The second known member of the entire Blood Angels legion to have overcome the Black Rage. (Unlike [[Mephiston]] he may have had [[Khorne|a bit of assistance]]. If you can call it that...)

{{Marines-Characters}}
[[Category:Warhammer 40,000]][[Category:Space Marines]][[Category:Space Marines Chapter Masters]][[Category:Blood Angels]]

Spanish Inquisition

2020-08-30T15:51:55Z

2A02:1811:5180:A200:EC3D:29FD:FA1D:618:

Unlike their [[Inquisition|Imperial]] counterparts, the '''Spanish Inquisition''' did not shove Inquisitorial retinues up people's asses for [[heresy|the slightest of offences]]. The Imperial Inquisition was, however, partially inspired by the Spanish Inquisition, or at least, the romanticized version of it and the one from the Black Legend, with the [[grimdark]] turned up more than a few notches of course.

== Background ==

The Spanish Inquisition wasn't the first such order to exist, it drew heavily from the Medieval Inquisition. The Medieval Inquisition as we know it was formally establishedby Pope Gregorius IX around 1230, its goal to fight religious dissent (like for instance Catharism) in an unified way across Europa. Important to understand here is that despite the modern depiction of bloodthirsty madmen (like in the novel '''The Name of the Rose''' bu Umberto Eco), the goal of the Inquisition was to protect the church and safeguard people's souls from heresy rather than punishment. Gregorius famously both endorsed and limited his inquisitors' authority in order to put a stop to the witch hunts that were little more than mob justice, and focus on redeeming those that erred through penance and pilgrimage.

== Origins ==

Fast-forward two centuries : the real-life Spanish Inquisition were a combined political/religious party formed in 1480 by the Spanish Monarchs Ferdinand II of Aragon and Isabella I of Castille. [[Skub|While the reasons for their founding have been debated by historians]], several clear goals (or more popular theories) are that it was intended to maintain Catholic orthodoxy in their kingdoms and to replace the Medieval Inquisition, which was under Papal control.

While the groundwork was laid in 1478, the Spanish Inquisition was officially formed in the year 1480. For context, the reason why the Spanish monarchy wanted their own Inquisition was because Spain was in the final stages of the Reconquista, conquering Moorish Grenada ten years later. Spain, being only very recently unified, wanted to maintain its existence through a strong central government supported by an orthodox system of laws & religion. All remaining Muslims were required to convert, but the monarchy wanted to make extra sure that they were being for realsies and wouldn't try to rebel or conspire with the Ottomans. They also threw in the Jews, because of the Jews traitorous actions during much of the reconquista, allying with the Moors and often fighting alongside them such as in the [https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Higueruela.jpg Battle of La Higueruela (notice the banners)] for one instance. The scope often changed with Spain's political agenda, Lutherans (who were making controlling the Netherlands more difficult) and unruly nobles often fell under investigation.

It is important to keep in mind that Inquisitions controlled by the Church (i.e. "actual" Inquisitions) were very different. For starters, they didn't kill people. The problem was that secular governments had their own laws about heresy...and were very torture and execution happy. This somewhat contributed to the end of the Inquisitions as Inquisitors weren't exactly enthusiastic about their jobs when they knew anyone found guilty faced horrific treatment but not finding them guilty so they could be forgiven by a priest would risk those people's souls. A real rock-and-a-hard-place situation. Catholic Inquisitors rarely decided there was enough evidence to go investigate an accusation and dismissed the claim as false. On the occasions they did investigate, they rarely found enough evidence for a trial. When the investigation did progress to a trial, the Inquisitors rarely found someone guilty. When someone was found guilty, they were given God's forgiveness and released. Torture was limited to about three minutes or so per day and no permanent damage of any kind was permitted. Often, Inquisitors refused to use torture or outright decried torture as sinful. The Catholic Inquisitors set standards of practice which grew into the modern day ideas of the humane treatment of prisoners and modern police investigative practices.

The politically-controlled Inquisitions were basically "you're guilty and I'm going to hurt you until you admit it" if you were a political enemy of the State, but were generally actually pretty good at their jobs when you were a random Joe.

== Goals ==
The Spanish Inquisition was created during a time of high political development in Spain. At the end of the 15th Century, the Catholic Monarchs, Elizabeth I of Castilla and Ferdinand II of Aragon, were trying to unify all peninsular kingdoms into a single state that they might recover the legacy of the Visigothic Kingdom of old. However, it was still the Middle Ages, and this meant that pretty much all territories had their own set of laws, organizations and, of course, nobles that pretty much controlled most of the land. Medieval kings were not absolute rulers, after all; they were bound by quite a lot of law with regards to their range of action, much more than many would assume. If Elizabeth and Ferdinand were to create an unified kingdom controlled by them and them alone, this massive division had to be overcome. And for that, this new Kingdom would need an organization that had authority everywhere.

It is always important to remember that the Spanish Inquisition was a political tool first and foremost (like the Gestapo). Alongside the Spanish Royal Guard (one of the first attempts to create a modern and stable army in Europe after the fall of Rome), the Spanish Inquisition was one of the organizations that were needed for the creation of a unified State in the whole Iberian Peninsula. The Inquisition targeted people and ideas that might have broken with the growing structure of Spain, and it just so happened that a religious organization was the perfect body to do so. Spain was an incredibly religious country at the time; centuries of Reconquista had seared in the medieval Spaniard's mind the idea of Christianity's right for the land over the infidel. The Spanish Inquisition worked for the Spanish monarchy, targeting cases of [[heresy]], [[/d/|moral misconduct]], treason, political dissidence... and all other similar crimes, while most of the time hiding them under a blanket of religious condemnation. Nobles not that loyal to the new monarchs? Accuse them of some religious misconduct, and you'd have the Inquisition keeping them under serious scrutiny. Printing books that have been deemed "problematic" by the Inquisition? You better watch out. Practice Muslim beliefs and sympathies (under a Christian façade) that might evolve into harbouring Tunisian pirates or the dreaded Ottoman Turks, or even forming a 5th column if war ever broke out? You got a visit from the Inquisition. Trying to bring Protestantism to Spain and risk having the shitshow of the 16th and 17th century religious conflicts? I hope you like barbecue... Witchcraft was usually laughed at as baseless superstition: The Inquisition hired some of the smartest and most prepared individuals at the time, so they were pretty enlightened about ignoring the magical and focus on the political side of things. Hollywood, popular media, and general knowledge (i.e. "common idiocy") led modern peoples to widely believe that the Witch Hunts were Catholic. They were actually Protestant; Catholicism has always held that witches do not exist (demons don't give a fuck about any deals). ''Witchcraft'' does but not witches (summon demon, get soul stolen instead of making a deal, no deal = no witch).

Remember than an accusation and investigation of the Inquisition could ruin someone's life, and that was intentional. Not only could the nobility lose everything they have (riches, titles and land that would go right into the crown's hands), but also end up ostracized from the community if they were ever condemned and punished. Fortunately, most of the guilty verdicts did not end with an execution, but rather a fine and/or incarceration. Yet the Inquisition were the ones who decided if the person was guilty or not and the local authorities were the ones who had to carry out the punishment for the crime themselves. And if that could happen to nobility, [[Grimdark|imagine what they could do to regular peasants...]] Also, because they were a religious corps in charge of (theoretically) rooting out heresy, they couldn't act against those who weren't Christian. They had no authority over Muslims and Jews because they were not heretics, "merely" unbelievers. The solution to that came in the form of the massive forced conversions to Catholicism during the later part of the 15th Century. Now everyone was under scrutiny.

== Reputation ==

The Spanish Inquisition is often stated in popular media and medieval history as an example of Catholic intolerance and repression. Notably the first major authors of this idea were Protestants who disapproved of the Catholic Church and Heads of State at odds with Spain. Modern historians now question or disagree with earlier accounts concerning the severity of the Inquisition. Henry Kamen asserts that "the 'myth' of the all-powerful, torture-mad inquisition is largely an invention of nineteenth century Protestant authors with an agenda to discredit the Papacy". But due to a little thing called the printing press that the Spanish government (among others) didn't take seriously at the time, the Protestants happily made the Inquisition look as awful as they possibly could and by the time the Inquisitions stopped the "black legend" was there to stay (it didn't help that Spain was at the peak of its power and had plenty of rivals who were eager to drag its reputation through the mud).

After The Enlightenment and from the 20th century onward, this was exacerbated by various groups of people [[Edgy|prejudiced against Christianity]] or [[Imperial Truth|religion in general]] who took the narrative of a violent, oppressive Spanish Inquisition and ran marathons with it until at least the late 2010's (even in comedic works; for example, the memetic "No one expects the Spanish Inquisition!" originated from the British series "Monty's Python's Flying Circus" and at least one of the series' creators, John Cleese, has a low opinion of religion). Pop cultural references to the Inquisition inevitably ignore the distinction between the Church-controlled Inquisition and the state-controlled ones because a fair and reasonable system typically makes for a dull movie or they had an axe to grind.

There is an important life lesson to be had here: if you believe something because you saw it in a movie, a TV show, a game or you heard or read it somewhere, you shouldn’t assume it’s true. You should research it. And no, articles and such that just say “yeah, that’s the truth” are not research. Articles that explain the practices and history along with citing journals and such from that time is research. If someone argued “everyone knows it” then remember that truth is not a democracy.

== Punishments ==

Despite popular media and perception of them as a blood soaked organization, execution was a far less common punishment for crimes. Most of punishments the Spanish Inquisition inflicted on people declared guilty was merely paying a fine or a short jail sentence. It's important to note that torture was not the punishment, torture was officially a means (and on paper at least a last resort) to extract a confession.

They are often associated with (or reviled for) using torture in popular perception and media. Torture was standard operating procedure for courts, secular or not, inside or outside the Spanish Inquisition, at the time. Methods of torture included:

*Strappado: binding the victims hands behind their back and suspending them by their wrists. Sometimes a series of drops would be added, jerking the victim up and down and forcing their arms out of their sockets. Weights could be added to the victims body to make the hanging even more excruciating.
*Toca, or [[waterboarding]]: securing the victim to an inclined board and binding them so that they cannot move. Then the victim is gagged and has a cloth placed over his or her face, and water poured over it. Toca gives the victim a feeling of drowning, even if no water enters the nose or mouth. CIA agents go through it as part of their training and on average last only 14 seconds before begging to be released.
*The Rack: often considered the most painful of tortures by contemporaries. The victim had their hands and feet bound to rollers at opposite ends of a frame. In theory, the torturer would turn the rollers and the chains attached would dislocate the joints of the victim. In theory if the torturer continued to turn the rollers the victim's arms and legs would be torn off (probably not true, tendons and ligaments are incredibly strong. Reports of people being pulled apart by horses mention that they have to be helped by cutting the joints a bit to get the process started. Who knows though, maybe ratchets are just that effective, and some people spent a long time on the rack, which might loosen them up some).

Many other torture devices associated with the inquisition are thought to be later inventions by the Victorians, such as the infamous Iron Maiden, a spiked coffin that victims would supposedly be stuffed inside. Another one, the Brazen Bull, actually comes from Ancient Greece; basically, a victim was stuffed inside a hollow bronze bull, fitted with an internal horn. As the bull was set on fire, the victim’s tortured screaming would sound like a bull’s roar. As you can see, comparing these examples with actual torture devices, the real ones tended to be less focused on grotesque conceptual horror and more simple in design and use.

There were, however, regulations for the Spanish Inquisition on how far the torture could go; no removing body parts and nothing that resulted in death. While it's a commonly publicized fact that the first head of the Spanish Inquisition (the infamous [[Torquemada Coteaz|Torquemada]]) made frequent use of torture, a less known fact is that that [[Noblebright|the Pope at the time went to the King and Queen of Spain to try and rein in his cruelty]] (and as an example of problem with political elements in the Inquisition [[Grimdark|the King and Queen pressured him in various ways to keep his mouth shut about it]]). Despite this, the Spanish Inquisition are known to have been fairer, and used torture less often, than the secular courts at the time. There were several cases of people on trial in secular courts for lesser crimes who would blaspheme in the courtroom, just so they could be tried by the Spanish Inquisition instead, who would give them a fair(er) trial.

In a particular instance of "shit that wouldn't sound out of place in 40k", in 1256, Pope Alexander IV decreed that inquisitors could clear each other from any wrongdoing that they might have performed during torture sessions... [[Derp|except this decree was for the Medieval Inquisition, and predated the Spanish Inquisition by over 150 years]].

== Death Toll ==

Modern estimates based on incomplete but detailed records put the total number of people trialed from 1540 to 1700 at around 87,000, with 2,070 people being sentenced to death. With these death sentences, the numbers that ended with an execution ''in persona'' (the person is actually executed) is around 1,300. Some managed to escape the Inquisition before they were executed so instead they were executed ''in effigy'', as in an effigy of the accused was burned in their place; "executions" in this manner (again, from 1540 to 1700) numbered at around 770.

This gives the Spanish Inquisitions trials during this period a death rate of less than 1-in-40, and this is before factoring in whether or not the death sentences were actually warranted given the Spanish Inquisition dealt with numerous crimes besides heresy, contradicting - if not debunking - the blood-soaked reputation the Spanish Inquisition is often given even to this day.

== Later Years and Disbandment ==

The Spanish Inquisition began to lose influence in its later years, and was formally disbanded in the early-mid 19th century in the year 1834. While Napoleon's occupation of Spain had disbanded it 1808, his defeat and the return of Ferdinand the VIIth to the country meant that Napoleon's law became moot. Though, to be fair, Ferdinand didn't reinstate the Inquisition either, it was unpopular and pretty ineffective at this point, so it was supplanted by ''Juntas de Fe'', a much smaller organization that was basically an Inquisition-lite. The Regent for the queen Elisabeth IInd of Spain, Maria Christina of the Two Sicilies, finished the organization once after all in 1834, as a political maneuovre to win the liberal's support against the carlists.

So the Spanish Inquisition was in power for a total of 356 years (using 1478) or 354 (using 1480) and hasn't existed since it was disbanded '''166 years before the 21st century''' (despite how much certain people complain about them).

== "The Inquisition Still Exists" ==

Yes, it does. But only sorta. The main Catholic Church's version, the [[wiki:Congregation for the Doctrine of the Faith]] <ref>As it is ''currently'' known; it's gone by several names, historically, mainly because of the bad press the Spanish one had, and a few reorganizations.</ref> on which the Spanish one was based, still exists. But the most they can do is excommunicate you. For more detail, see about the Church controlled Inquisition in the Origins section, above.

To continue from there, because they served a continuing valid purpose, and were usually fairly light hands, the main Inquisition never really went away. And with the removal of "heresy" from criminal law, any secular power they had was gone. Nowdays, they're only a concern if you work for the Catholic Church.

== Relating to /tg/ ==

[[Monty Python|The Spanish Inquisition is not to be expected.]] (Despite the fact that in real-life they were legally obliged to give thirty days notice.)

As noted previously, the current Inquisition of the Imperium of Man owes a lot of its concept to a popularized depiction of the Spanish Inquisition, right down to having their own Torquemada.

Also, Victoria Lamb makes some pretty badass Spanish Inquisitorial models.

[[Category:History]]

ZSU 23-4 Shilka

2020-08-30T11:07:58Z

2A02:1811:5180:A200:EC3D:29FD:FA1D:618:

[[File:Shilka .jpg|300px|right|thumb|DAKADAKADAKADAKA]]
{{topquote|We don't fly and we're not letting anyone else, either!|Unofficial motto of Russian anti-air corps}}

The '''ZSU 23-4''' is a SPAAG made by the Soviet Union. Its basically a light tank with 4 autocannons to shoot down aircraft and any infantry unlucky enough to be in it's sights.

Its NATO designation is "Shilka", although the West has occasionally called it "Zeus", inspired by its Soviet designation. That designation is not just military word salad though and has real meaning: ''ZSU'' is an acronym for ''Zenitnaya Samokhodnaya Ustanovka'' and means (in russian) ''anti-aircraft self-propelled (weapon)system'', 23 is the caliber of it's barrels and 4 is how many it has.

==In Team Yankee==
[[File:Shilka Stat Card.jpg|300px|left|thumb|The Stat Card]]
The Shilka is the only Soviet SPAAG in Team Yankee at the moment (yet we have literally 3 SAM (Surface to Air Missile) vehicles), and is quite a decent little machine. Like all SPAAGs, the Shilka gets the Dedicated AA and Radar Rules, which means that it can engage aerial threats with its full ROF out to a range of 16"/40cm without adding +1 to hit.The increase of the range from 50cm to 80cm during AA shooting of the 23mm 2A7 AA gun comes from the radar taking over aiming when the target is in the sky rather the gunner using the Mk. 1 eyeball on the ground.

The Shilka is <s>okay at dealing with ground targets</s> comparable to an autocannon on steroids. Despite AT6 making M113s and IFVs a tough nut to crack, 6 shots with a 5+ FP are enough to comfortably defeat most APCs, vehicles, and infantry in the open. For a comparable amount of firepower, most countries would be paying double the points! Though with an all-around armour rating of 1, don't expect them to do well against things like the .50 cal that almost every American tank has bolted to the top, or anything bigger than that. You should be using this thing to defend your tanks against attack helicopters though, not putting large numbers of small holes in APCs and other light vehicles.

This thing is arguably the best anti-air unit in the game due to its brutal cost-efficiency thanks to the sheer volume of firepower it can bring to bear. The fact that this unit can engage ground targets with vicious results makes it an auto-include; nothing is safe from its 4 barrels of hell (apart from tanks). It may not beat the Gepard in a ring fight, but it will make it points back far more easily than the Gepard.

Shilkas can be taken by East German, Polish and Soviet Armies at 1 point per vehicle in a platoon of 2-4 as company level support independent of the missile air defence slot which the Gaskin and Gopher compete for. The Czech version costs 2 points for a pair, or 3 points for 4 Shilkas.

===Israel===
[[File:IZZSU.jpg|300px|left|thumb|]]
For the Israeli commander, this unit is in direct competition with the American VADS. Its main gun has near identical stats; except that the Shilka has 1 less shot while stationary (ROF 6 vs 7). It also features weaker armor from the front and sides which is only relevant for autocannon fire: anything heavier like a LAW will be going through your soft-skinned chassis. Additionally, the Shilka features much worse dash speeds.

As a SPAAG unit, these forces might be used as heavy autocannons to engage enemy soft-skins. However, you do gain top armor 1 which can make a HUGE difference. The smart player will try to pick off your support units from the safety of a mortar pit, and 1 point of armor can make a huge difference when most players are packing AT1 and AT3 artillery such as 60mm and 120mm mortars.

Like many other borrowed Israeli units, it mostly features a better trained crew, without improvements to the physical vehicle. It does get amphibious, but with water terrain being about as common as a tank victory against Milan spam... Yeah.

TL;DR:
+1 to courage, assault, counterattack. +2 to skill.
Slower ROF than the VADS and slower movement, gains top armor 1.

{{clear}}

==IRL==
[[File:Zsu 23 4 shilka.jpg|300px|right|thumb|DAKADAKADAKADAKA ]]
The ZSU is one of the more popular armoured fighting vehicles made by the Soviet Union, traditionally armed with a quad-linked 4x23mm autocannon array, a search light, and radar equipment. Its primarily designed to shoot down low-flying aircraft like helicopters and occasional fighter craft, but its guns were also powerful enough to tear through lightly-armored vehicles and infantry aswell. Infact it was a common practice for Soviet soldiers to bring ZSUs whenever possible in anti-infantry operations due to their sheer lethality. In this regard, the ZSU found major use in the Invasion of Afghanistan, where often it would protect conveys within the hilly, mountainous terrain of the country. The Insurgents soon found out that quad 23mm cannons had much higher elevation than the weapons on the BMPs, BTRs and T-52s, allowing it to engage them from their ambush points on high ridges and hilltops. A special variant was deployed for that use in this conflict, lacking the AA radar in favour of increased ammunition capacity, turning the AA tank into a meat chopper. That said, the ZSU was never meant to be a front-line vehicle, so it's armor is woefully light, even concentrated heavy machine gun fire to it's flimsier side and rear armor could potentially wreck it's day, which is understandable as it was designed doctrinally to avoid direct ground combat. They were also employed in the conflict in Chechnya to combat insurgents firing from upper floors of tall apartment block. These floors were too high and the street too narrow to be engaged by BMP-2 autocannons so ZSU's would be employed instead. Obviously they were horribly vulnerable to rocket fire from above, but 4 23.s firing at you tends to dampen your enthusiasm for hanging out a window with an RPG..

That said: the reason for the high rate of fire is that by the 1960's aircraft move ridiculously fast, going from world war 2's "''ludicrously fast''" to "there is a mosquito-shaped hole in my teeth". You have seconds to shoot at a target, so you need as high a rate as fire as possible to try and ensure you get at least one hit and at those speeds one hole in the air frame will do the trick to down a target by itself. This means that the whole concept of cannons or machine guns against aircraft from the ground is a bit of a flawed concept (except they work so obviously it isn't flawed, and loading shells with shrapnel helps when that's done on various weapons). Missiles do better due to their ability to track a target. However the ZSU has served with all Soviet states and their allies as the go-to SPAAG from its inception until today. It is mainly used today only by armies unable to field better equipment, though it can definitively ruin the day of any helicopter due to their lower speeds and operational altitudes. They’re also what you want to use guns instead of missiles on, since any low-flying vehicle is difficult to get a proper target lock on.

{{Soviet Forces in Team Yankee}}
{{East German Forces in Team Yankee}}
{{Polish Forces in Team Yankee}}
{{Czech Forces in Team Yankee}}
{{Iraqi Forces in Team Yankee}}
{{Iranian Forces in Team Yankee}}
{{Israeli Forces in Team Yankee}}

[[Category:Vehicles]]

Cannibalism

2020-08-30T10:11:18Z

2A02:1811:5180:A200:EC3D:29FD:FA1D:618: /* History & Biology */

Usually defined as "eating your own species" or "eating a creature who, when alive, could carry on a conversation", '''cannibalism''' is an occasional feature of /tg/-related media.

==/tg/ Applicability==
Given how disgusting this topic is, and a [[/pol/|history of racism]] associated with talking about cannibalism, you'd expect tabletop games writers (and writers in general) to avoid focusing on cannibalism in their works, even in very grim settings. And they generally do.

But some don't! Exceptions include:
* [[Always Chaotic Evil]] races or monsters practicing cannibalism on the species, cultural, or tribal scale.
* Alternately, a well-trodden cannibalism plot point is human (or demihuman) flesh being passed off as some other meat, perpetrated by some malevolent industry insiders or especially callous authorities.
* The other main group of exceptions are "horrific magic" situations, where the myth of "gaining the power of what you eat" is played upon, near-universally with the caveat that doing so is a ''very'' evil act.
* The smallest class of exceptions just involves cannibalism as part of a horrific murder. Basically, there's nothing cultural or mystical about cannibalism here. The person in question is just a sick fuck.

===Specific /tg/ examples===
As a Tribal/Cultural/Species practice:

*In mythology (and thus freely used by tabletop games):
** [[Ogre]]s are categorically man-eaters (with a preference for eating babies), as well as [[giant]]s on many occasions.
** [[Vampires]] (both classical blood-drinkers and proto-zombie flesh-eaters) might also be classed as cannibals, though since they are undead, we tend to think of them as no longer being human to begin with.
** [[Ghoul]]s are fairly straightforward examples originally taken from Arabic mythology; their main identity is "graveyard dwelling man-eaters".
* In keeping with it's edgelord sensibilities, [[Warhammer 40k]] has a lot of examples. Here's just a few:
** The [[Dark Eldar]] feed their slaves with processed corpses of dead slaves, among other things. The Dark Eldar themselves may also indulge in the cannibalism of other species if they feel like it, [[grimdark|sometimes with their meal still alive and conscious so that they can additionally savor their agony]].
** The [[Kroot]] need to eat sentient beings in order to remain intelligent and regularly eats certain individuals to evolve specific traits.
** The entire [[ork|orkoid race]] is one big food chain in itself, and bigger/complex life forms will eat the smaller/less-abled ones below them if needed/they feel like it. A special mention however, goes to the eating [[squig]], an simple orkoid life form that is solely made for the orks to cultivate, harvest, and eat.
** Most orkoid species will also eat other beings if it fancies them, especially the orks themselves and larger combat squig species.
** The Imperium feed people Corpse starch (made from processed human bodies). While it could be an extreme example of waste not want not (as this typically happens in Hive Worlds, where resources are stretched thin as it is), it is a bit [[grimderp]] too. The rejuvenate drug that was used by high imperial nobility and officers are made out of human fetus, guess that's unavoidable if one wishes to live longer.
** Uncivilized Feral Worlds may have cannibalistic rituals within the tribes, especially if they're tainted by Chaos. Even if they're brought under the heel of the Imperium and the [[Imperial Creed]] is spread, this does not 100% guarantee that feral worlders will shrug off cannibalism completely.
** Due to their [[Gene Seed|Omophagea]], Space Marines can consume the the brains of fallen enemies to take in their knowledge. Some astartes chapters also incorporate cannibalism into their chapter rituals in some way (such as the [[Blood Angels]]' blood drinking rituals). The [[Sons of Malice]] chapter is one notable example, except they were declared a heretic as a result (reasonable since they having been consume a lot of chaos worshipers corpses during their services around the [[Eye of Terror|pinky hole of all obvious evil]]). This makes one wonder the point of giving Spess Muhreens such an ability, given most of their enemies would be likely to corrupt via eating them. On the other hand, having the ability to sustain on any being's flesh while fighting far away without supply for a long time is a convenient but situational ability for survival, truly just how the Emperor intended.
** The forces of [[Chaos]] regularly indulges in various forms of cannibalism (Nurgle followers for example, brew the corpses of defeated enemies into a variety of concoctions for consumption, and Khorne regularly involves the consumption of blood and other bloody gibs to worship him). Fluff however, tends not to not mention them too often, or in too much in detail when they occur.
** The [[Tyranids]] are a race of blind, ravenous consumption and will eat anything and everything, including themselves if needed. Hell, some of their [[Tyranid_Bio-Weapons#Fleshborer|weapons]] fire living projectiles that attempts to devour their target within their short lifespan. Although since they are not sentient creatures, hell, they are not even individuals, it is hardly cannibalism. More like predatory behavior. In DOW: retribution, there's a scene where the hive tyrant let it self consumed by the digestion pool in order for its mind to reappear somewhere else in the sector.
* Similar to 40k, [[Warhammer Fantasy]] (and by extension [[Age of Sigmar]]) uses the concept of cannibalism to add extra grimdark.
** [[Orcs & Goblins]] are as cannibalistic as their 40k counterparts.
** Ghouls are former humans who have been deformed into monsters by the act of cannibalism. In AoS they're part the [[Flesh-Eater Courts]], who have the added distinction of being deluded into believing they're being gallant knights when they devour people.
**The Mourngul is another monster created from men driven to cannibalism, because for some reason the setting really needed two monsters with the same gimmick.
**The [[Ogre Kingdoms|Ogres]] are a race whose most distinctive feature is their constant hunger. Given that Ogres generally don't have a concept of morals, cannibalism is common amongst them.
** The human worshipers of [[Khorne]] in Age of Sigmar are often shown as being cannibals.
** Cannibalism is a big part of the Skaven. To them life is cheap, food is expensive and often someone can serve you better as lunch than as a wounded slave or as a backstabber.
* [[Dungeons and Dragons]] have many "true omnivores"; we won't count them unless they are intelligent.
** Xanxost the Slaad, a frequent narrator in various [[Planescape]] books, would usually discuss the taste of some of the (sentient) species he was discussing. Usually as a punchline.
** The "Flinds", a tribe or subspecies of [[Gnoll]] that eats other Gnolls, along with just about all the other races.
** The halflings of [[Dark Sun]] eat only other races; but they're called "cannibals" anyway.

* [[Paranoia]] has a few scenarios centering either around it, or the implication that Friend Computer's Food Processors use deceased Citizens of Alpha Complex as an input.

As a "Horrific Magic":

* Diablerie, from [[Vampire: The Masquerade]] and [[Vampire: The Requiem]], which involves eating another vampire's ''soul'' through their blood.
* The Devourers of the Flesh, from [[Mage: The Awakening]], a Left-Handed Path that are more or less exactly what their name claims.

==Standard Cannibalism Jokes==
There are a few standard jokes or items referred to in word-play associated with cannibalism:

* The name "Long Pig" or "Long pork", from the semi-euphemistic description of the dish by certain Polynesian tribes.
* The actual taste of human meat has been compared to either pork or veal, depending on who you ask, and how it's prepared. Human musculature more resembles that of young cows, but our diet more closely resembles that of pigs (cows being obligate herbivores, pigs being omnivores).
* "Soylent Green" is the other favorite name for processed human flesh, after the movie of the same name and the book it was based on, "Make Room! Make Room!"
* [[The Lord of the Rings|LOOKS LIKE MEAT'S BACK ON THE MENU BOYS!]]

==The Reasons It's A Touchy Subject==
There are five main reasons why most modern media either avoids cannibalism, or downplays it:

#Most mammals (that includes you!) are instinctively predisposed to avoid cannibalism (barring ''severe'' stress such as starvation), since, as mentioned above, cannibalism is a '''really''' great way to spread disease.
#Eating people generally involves human corpses, which begs the question of where the corpses came from. Most people find the idea of someone being murdered to be eaten highly disturbing.
#Native tribes were frequently accused of being cannibals or portrayed as being cannibals when they weren't. Many tribes who did practice cannibalism were mis-attributed as to when they practiced it. Given the subsequent abuse of the accusation by [[/pol/|blatant racists]] to dehumanize natives, most modern works try to avoid the subject entirely to not be accused (even by double proxy) of propagating racist stereotypes.
#There are some already [[/d/|rather disturbing people]] who find cannibalism a quite arousing subject. Any sane author who knows about this wants to keep a great deal of distance between their works and [[Furry|said]] [[/d/|people]].
#That shit's disgusting, yo.

==History & Biology==
Multiple cultures throughout history have practiced cannibalism, more for mystic/cultural reasons than out of necessity. The most common notion behind ritual cannibalism is that by consuming an enemy's flesh, a person would gain their strength. That being said, the practice was near-universally banned by nearly every group that had enough food (read: protein) to go around, for fairly obvious ethical, moral and hygienic reasons. Eating your own species is a '''really''' great way to spread disease, and not a very polite thing to do to a stranger.

A prominent example of a disease spread by cannibalism: A particularly nasty consequence of cannibalism is Kuru, a prion-based neurodegenerative disease which affected the Fore people of Papua New Guinea through their tradition of consuming their dead as part of the funeral rite (it was thought to free the spirit of the deceased). Symptoms include muscle tremors, loss of coordination leading to the inability to walk or even sit without support, emotional instability, and certain death. Things like this probably helped lead to the idea of ghouls and other such degraded man eaters.

More common is cannibalism by desperation. If fields burned before harvest lie under snow, storehouses plundered by passing armies, what little escaped pillage is either locked away in hordes or rationed out in sub-subsistence portions, game (including sparrows and rats) is running thin and people will kill each other for a sack of turnips, turning the remains of a dead enemy patrol into warrior-burgers and knight-steaks so you might make it to till the land again beats an otherwise assured miserable death. This sort of thing, while still unpleasant, is not so much evil as tragic.

Further, cannibalism was enough of an occasional feature of nautical life (almost always in fairly extreme circumstances involving a lack of food) to be somewhat regularly discussed when the subject came up. This side of the subject is probably beyond the nature of this article, save to note that it kept "civilized" people from being ''too'' high-and-mighty about the practice.

Also of particular interest, as it gets cited in /tg/ related discussions of the subject: the mating habits of certain insects, the females of which may eat the males after mating--although, by most biologists' accounts, many such species do so regularly only when in captivity and the male cannot escape and it happens much less frequently in the wilds. One has to make a distinction between two possibilities:

- The first, and most common happenstance, is when the male gets eaten before copulation can occur because the female sees him as threat and attacks the invader in her home.

- The latter, much rarer, is when the male gets eaten after copulation. In some insect species (like for instances bees) the act of mating rips the reproductive organs away from the male, leaving him to die in short order afterwards and his body as easy nutrition for the female.

[[Category:History]]

Cannibalism

2020-08-30T10:10:59Z

2A02:1811:5180:A200:EC3D:29FD:FA1D:618: /* History & Biology */

Usually defined as "eating your own species" or "eating a creature who, when alive, could carry on a conversation", '''cannibalism''' is an occasional feature of /tg/-related media.

==/tg/ Applicability==
Given how disgusting this topic is, and a [[/pol/|history of racism]] associated with talking about cannibalism, you'd expect tabletop games writers (and writers in general) to avoid focusing on cannibalism in their works, even in very grim settings. And they generally do.

But some don't! Exceptions include:
* [[Always Chaotic Evil]] races or monsters practicing cannibalism on the species, cultural, or tribal scale.
* Alternately, a well-trodden cannibalism plot point is human (or demihuman) flesh being passed off as some other meat, perpetrated by some malevolent industry insiders or especially callous authorities.
* The other main group of exceptions are "horrific magic" situations, where the myth of "gaining the power of what you eat" is played upon, near-universally with the caveat that doing so is a ''very'' evil act.
* The smallest class of exceptions just involves cannibalism as part of a horrific murder. Basically, there's nothing cultural or mystical about cannibalism here. The person in question is just a sick fuck.

===Specific /tg/ examples===
As a Tribal/Cultural/Species practice:

*In mythology (and thus freely used by tabletop games):
** [[Ogre]]s are categorically man-eaters (with a preference for eating babies), as well as [[giant]]s on many occasions.
** [[Vampires]] (both classical blood-drinkers and proto-zombie flesh-eaters) might also be classed as cannibals, though since they are undead, we tend to think of them as no longer being human to begin with.
** [[Ghoul]]s are fairly straightforward examples originally taken from Arabic mythology; their main identity is "graveyard dwelling man-eaters".
* In keeping with it's edgelord sensibilities, [[Warhammer 40k]] has a lot of examples. Here's just a few:
** The [[Dark Eldar]] feed their slaves with processed corpses of dead slaves, among other things. The Dark Eldar themselves may also indulge in the cannibalism of other species if they feel like it, [[grimdark|sometimes with their meal still alive and conscious so that they can additionally savor their agony]].
** The [[Kroot]] need to eat sentient beings in order to remain intelligent and regularly eats certain individuals to evolve specific traits.
** The entire [[ork|orkoid race]] is one big food chain in itself, and bigger/complex life forms will eat the smaller/less-abled ones below them if needed/they feel like it. A special mention however, goes to the eating [[squig]], an simple orkoid life form that is solely made for the orks to cultivate, harvest, and eat.
** Most orkoid species will also eat other beings if it fancies them, especially the orks themselves and larger combat squig species.
** The Imperium feed people Corpse starch (made from processed human bodies). While it could be an extreme example of waste not want not (as this typically happens in Hive Worlds, where resources are stretched thin as it is), it is a bit [[grimderp]] too. The rejuvenate drug that was used by high imperial nobility and officers are made out of human fetus, guess that's unavoidable if one wishes to live longer.
** Uncivilized Feral Worlds may have cannibalistic rituals within the tribes, especially if they're tainted by Chaos. Even if they're brought under the heel of the Imperium and the [[Imperial Creed]] is spread, this does not 100% guarantee that feral worlders will shrug off cannibalism completely.
** Due to their [[Gene Seed|Omophagea]], Space Marines can consume the the brains of fallen enemies to take in their knowledge. Some astartes chapters also incorporate cannibalism into their chapter rituals in some way (such as the [[Blood Angels]]' blood drinking rituals). The [[Sons of Malice]] chapter is one notable example, except they were declared a heretic as a result (reasonable since they having been consume a lot of chaos worshipers corpses during their services around the [[Eye of Terror|pinky hole of all obvious evil]]). This makes one wonder the point of giving Spess Muhreens such an ability, given most of their enemies would be likely to corrupt via eating them. On the other hand, having the ability to sustain on any being's flesh while fighting far away without supply for a long time is a convenient but situational ability for survival, truly just how the Emperor intended.
** The forces of [[Chaos]] regularly indulges in various forms of cannibalism (Nurgle followers for example, brew the corpses of defeated enemies into a variety of concoctions for consumption, and Khorne regularly involves the consumption of blood and other bloody gibs to worship him). Fluff however, tends not to not mention them too often, or in too much in detail when they occur.
** The [[Tyranids]] are a race of blind, ravenous consumption and will eat anything and everything, including themselves if needed. Hell, some of their [[Tyranid_Bio-Weapons#Fleshborer|weapons]] fire living projectiles that attempts to devour their target within their short lifespan. Although since they are not sentient creatures, hell, they are not even individuals, it is hardly cannibalism. More like predatory behavior. In DOW: retribution, there's a scene where the hive tyrant let it self consumed by the digestion pool in order for its mind to reappear somewhere else in the sector.
* Similar to 40k, [[Warhammer Fantasy]] (and by extension [[Age of Sigmar]]) uses the concept of cannibalism to add extra grimdark.
** [[Orcs & Goblins]] are as cannibalistic as their 40k counterparts.
** Ghouls are former humans who have been deformed into monsters by the act of cannibalism. In AoS they're part the [[Flesh-Eater Courts]], who have the added distinction of being deluded into believing they're being gallant knights when they devour people.
**The Mourngul is another monster created from men driven to cannibalism, because for some reason the setting really needed two monsters with the same gimmick.
**The [[Ogre Kingdoms|Ogres]] are a race whose most distinctive feature is their constant hunger. Given that Ogres generally don't have a concept of morals, cannibalism is common amongst them.
** The human worshipers of [[Khorne]] in Age of Sigmar are often shown as being cannibals.
** Cannibalism is a big part of the Skaven. To them life is cheap, food is expensive and often someone can serve you better as lunch than as a wounded slave or as a backstabber.
* [[Dungeons and Dragons]] have many "true omnivores"; we won't count them unless they are intelligent.
** Xanxost the Slaad, a frequent narrator in various [[Planescape]] books, would usually discuss the taste of some of the (sentient) species he was discussing. Usually as a punchline.
** The "Flinds", a tribe or subspecies of [[Gnoll]] that eats other Gnolls, along with just about all the other races.
** The halflings of [[Dark Sun]] eat only other races; but they're called "cannibals" anyway.

* [[Paranoia]] has a few scenarios centering either around it, or the implication that Friend Computer's Food Processors use deceased Citizens of Alpha Complex as an input.

As a "Horrific Magic":

* Diablerie, from [[Vampire: The Masquerade]] and [[Vampire: The Requiem]], which involves eating another vampire's ''soul'' through their blood.
* The Devourers of the Flesh, from [[Mage: The Awakening]], a Left-Handed Path that are more or less exactly what their name claims.

==Standard Cannibalism Jokes==
There are a few standard jokes or items referred to in word-play associated with cannibalism:

* The name "Long Pig" or "Long pork", from the semi-euphemistic description of the dish by certain Polynesian tribes.
* The actual taste of human meat has been compared to either pork or veal, depending on who you ask, and how it's prepared. Human musculature more resembles that of young cows, but our diet more closely resembles that of pigs (cows being obligate herbivores, pigs being omnivores).
* "Soylent Green" is the other favorite name for processed human flesh, after the movie of the same name and the book it was based on, "Make Room! Make Room!"
* [[The Lord of the Rings|LOOKS LIKE MEAT'S BACK ON THE MENU BOYS!]]

==The Reasons It's A Touchy Subject==
There are five main reasons why most modern media either avoids cannibalism, or downplays it:

#Most mammals (that includes you!) are instinctively predisposed to avoid cannibalism (barring ''severe'' stress such as starvation), since, as mentioned above, cannibalism is a '''really''' great way to spread disease.
#Eating people generally involves human corpses, which begs the question of where the corpses came from. Most people find the idea of someone being murdered to be eaten highly disturbing.
#Native tribes were frequently accused of being cannibals or portrayed as being cannibals when they weren't. Many tribes who did practice cannibalism were mis-attributed as to when they practiced it. Given the subsequent abuse of the accusation by [[/pol/|blatant racists]] to dehumanize natives, most modern works try to avoid the subject entirely to not be accused (even by double proxy) of propagating racist stereotypes.
#There are some already [[/d/|rather disturbing people]] who find cannibalism a quite arousing subject. Any sane author who knows about this wants to keep a great deal of distance between their works and [[Furry|said]] [[/d/|people]].
#That shit's disgusting, yo.

==History & Biology==
Multiple cultures throughout history have practiced cannibalism, more for mystic/cultural reasons than out of necessity. The most common notion behind ritual cannibalism is that by consuming an enemy's flesh, a person would gain their strength. That being said, the practice was near-universally banned by nearly every group that had enough food (read: protein) to go around, for fairly obvious ethical, moral and hygienic reasons. Eating your own species is a '''really''' great way to spread disease, and not a very polite thing to do to a stranger.

A prominent example of a disease spread by cannibalism: A particularly nasty consequence of cannibalism is Kuru, a prion-based neurodegenerative disease which affected the Fore people of Papua New Guinea through their tradition of consuming their dead as part of the funeral rite (it was thought to free the spirit of the deceased). Symptoms include muscle tremors, loss of coordination leading to the inability to walk or even sit without support, emotional instability, and certain death. Things like this probably helped lead to the idea of ghouls and other such degraded man eaters.

More common is cannibalism by desperation. If fields burned before harvest lie under snow, storehouses plundered by passing armies, what little escaped pillage is either locked away in hordes or rationed out in sub-subsistence portions, game (including sparrows and rats) is running thin and people will kill each other for a sack of turnips, turning the remains of a dead enemy patrol into warrior-burgers and knight-steaks so you might make it to till the land again beats an otherwise assured miserable death. This sort of thing, while still unpleasant, is not so much evil as tragic.

Further, cannibalism was enough of an occasional feature of nautical life (almost always in fairly extreme circumstances involving a lack of food) to be somewhat regularly discussed when the subject came up. This side of the subject is probably beyond the nature of this article, save to note that it kept "civilized" people from being ''too'' high-and-mighty about the practice.

Also of particular interest, as it gets cited in /tg/ related discussions of the subject: the mating habits of certain insects, the females of which may eat the males after mating--although, by most biologists' accounts, many such species do so regularly only when in captivity and the male cannot escape and it happens much less frequently in the wilds. One has to make a distinction between two possibilities:
- The first, and most common happenstance, is when the male gets eaten before copulation can occur because the female sees him as threat and attacks the invader in her home.
- The latter, much rarer, is when the male gets eaten after copulation. In some insect species (like for instances bees) the act of mating rips the reproductive organs away from the male, leaving him to die in short order afterwards and his body as easy nutrition for the female.

[[Category:History]]

Cannon

2020-08-30T08:49:43Z

2A02:1811:5180:A200:EC3D:29FD:FA1D:618: /* Types of cannon ammunition */

After the [[China|Chinese]] worked out the basics of gunpowder, they began to experiment with how to use it on the battlefield. As such, during the Song Dynasty people invented basic bombs, rockets and [[firearm]]s for use in combat. Eventually someone decided that their firelance was a good idea, but it could become an even better idea by making it even ''bigger''. Thus were born the first '''cannons'''. By an odd quirk of fate this design process apparently happened in reverse in Europe when gunpowder got around to them, with cannons being built first which were then scaled down into man portable handgonnes/hand-cannons.

Not to be confused with [[canon]], though they do share the same word root which refers to a tube/pipe.

== Cannons in Warfare ==
[[image:TurkishBombard.jpg|thumb|300px|right|The Great Turkish <s>Penis Compensator</s> Bombard, when you absolutely positively need to conquer Constantinople, accept no substitutes]]
The history of the cannon is written in blood-- in its first chapters often the blood of their users along with their targets. The first generations of cannons were crude affairs made by people with rudimentary metallurgy working things out by trial and error, with error often ending with the poor sods manning the gun getting a face full of iron shards, if not vaporized by the blast outright. This was made all the worse by the crude gunpowder available at the time and mishandling by inexperienced crews. In this initial period history Cannons were used for two purposes: small wall mounted defensive weapons in fortifications and large siege weapons to get through city walls. While they were powerful, cannons were simply too inaccurate in the early times, which was especially true for the heavier offensive guns. The big siege guns would usually be carted into a fixed location and be set there. Even if nothing went wrong they could only get off a couple shots an hour. Early cannons fired a variety of shot from spears to rough rocks, though eventually cast iron balls became the most common as things progressed. While early cannons were dangerous and unreliable in terms of accuracy or lifespan, they were more easy to cast and maintain compared to the wood and rope used to make catapults and ballista; with the latter prone to warping and decay from humidity and weather.

Eventually the art of cannon making improved as time went on and things became more reliable as gunmakers and gun crews got more experienced in handling their weapons (partially as the stupid ones got their jimmies blown off) and tried and true designs were replicated. As this happened, it prompted a change in fortification design. Tall and comparatively thin walls with high towers might be imposing and good at fending off attempts to scale them with ladders and siege towers, but they could not take that many salvos from a besieging enemy. Walls instead became shorter and thicker, reinforced with heavy earth ramparts to absorb the shock of cannonballs, with pointed battlements better suited for mounting defensive cannon and bouncing shells.

An even bigger development was the matter of cannons at sea. Though some people tried using catapults, ballistas, and the occasional flamethrower ([[Standard Template Construct|until the Byzantines forgot how they worked thanks to Emperors keeping the recipe and well...a coup and a couple of dead folks later, no one remembered where they put it.]]) as ship-mounted weapons, naval battles were up until this point settled by ramming or boarding actions. By the late 1400s potential of naval guns soon became obvious, damaging or destroying the wooden enemy ships outright, and navies began adapting their ship designs to carry guns. In 1571 the naval forces of the Holy League faced off against those of the Ottoman Empire off the coast of Greece at Lepanto. Though the Ottomans had a slight numerical advantage in terms of galleys and soldiers, [[Dakka|the Christians had more that twice as many cannons as well as better trained gun crews which could get off two shots for every volley]] the Ottomans could which was a big factor in the crushing defeat that the Ottomans suffered that day. Even so, the days of the galley were done and the age of sail had begun. Purely sail driven warships might not have the short range speed advantage or the shallow water maneuverability of a Galley, but where a galley would have ranks of rowers manning oars and a five or so frontal cannons a sailing ship would have a broadside with dozens of cannon.
[[image:24_pounder_gun.jpg|thumb|300px|left|A 24 pounder Long Gun from the age of Sail]]

From about 1400 to 1800 there were two main materials used to make cannons: Bronze and Iron. Bronze was an easier material to cast guns out of and it had a fair bit of give to it. In Europe the fact that there was a long tradition of making church bells and bronze statues meant that developing a bronze gun industry was fairly easy. Additionally, unlike Iron, Bronze takes much less energy to recast, so it was much easier to smelt down a worn gun (or statues or church bells) into a cannon. (Next time you're in Europe, take a shot every time you find a church-bell older than 200 years. It sucks as a drinking game, since you won't end up drunk at the end.) Bronze guns are also lighter than Iron guns of a similar size, making Bronze more mobile on the battlefield. Furthermore Bronze has some give to it, which means you have some warning if the gun is going to blow up. When an Iron gun is about to blow up, it doesn't give any warning when it's no longer safe, but a Bronze one will bulge first letting you know when you're starting to push your luck.

The problem was that copper and tin were fairly rare and in short supply and the cannon makers were not the only ones who wanted the stuff, so the number of Bronze guns you could make was limited. Iron, by contrast was more common and harder. That said, it took more fuel to smelt, it was much harder to melt and reforge, it took different and less-common craftsmen (since you couldn't just conscript the various bell-makers in your given nation), and if you didn't have a good metallurgist you would end up making a brittle gun that was liable to explode in your face. However an Iron ''IS'' the stronger material thanks to it's hardness, thus an Iron gun will last longer than a Bronze one (which it has to since you can't melt back down as easily). It's just easier to make a big thing like a cannon out of Bronze than Iron. As a general rule, Iron became more and more common as time went on and with it the need for artillery increased and metallurgy improved (in particular the use of coke instead of charcoal and the development of puddling was a big deal in the history of cannon making). It was only around the late 1600s that it became expected that a cannon foundry would produce more working guns than failures that burst in test firings.

When it came to making your cannon your best option was [[Casting]], be it cannons or models of cannons, the process is pretty much the same (and the best).

Of course Iron and Bronze were not the only things we made cannons out of. In a pinch or on the cheap, you could use wood to make a cannon, but wooden guns need much thicker walls than a metal one, limiting the size and weight of your shot and how much powder you can use. Another material experimented with was copper bound with leather, first toyed with by Gustavus Adolphus of Sweden against Poland. They were... less than successful, and replaced with 3-pound bronze guns.

You might ask why Gustavus decided to make a cannon out of leather in the first place? The answer is that as time went on and cannons became quicker firing and more accurate, people began wondering about other uses for cannons besides blasting apart castles and ships. Armies back then formed up their infantry into large, blocky formations of arquebusiers (men armed with pre-musket guns), halberdmen, swordsmen and pikemen. Against such foes, the old and massive castle-crackers were overkill. Beyond that they were still slow-firing and a massive pain in the butt to move around. What was needed against those targets were smaller, lighter, (a cannon that can shoot a 3 pound ball is still very heavy, though much lighter than one that shoots a 12 pound ball which is why Gustavus tried leather to make a light gun) guns that could quickly be moved into position, loaded and fired. Thus, bit by bit Gustavus developed the idea of Field Artillery for antipersonnel use and would end up attaching 12 or so field guns to each of his brigades (a military unit he himself invented) to support his infantry. This made Gustavus army devastatingly effective against the Catholic forces in the 30 years war. Just not with the leather cannons.

In any case by 1700 it was made clear that field artillery was a critical part of any army on the march. This development also meant that armies began to shift their tactics away from blockish formations but to long firing lines. You see, you can aim a cannon ball so that when it reaches the ground it bounces off of it in front of the formation so that it would fly though a block formation of thirty or more pikemen and musketeers at hip level, killing and maiming until it went out the other side. This was called the grazeing shot and warhammer fantasy players are likely well aware of how effective this could be on thick blocks of troops. The same would apply to a three man thick line of soldiers, though with only a tenth the casualties.

As technology got better, shells started to become more common. A cannon ball can only kill people it hits or those nearby (the later due to the fact that [[Khorne|the bones of the people hit spray fragments everywhere]]), but a shell can spray shrapnel and lethal pressure waves over a much wider area. This made direct fire much less effective since a cannon needed to have a high muzzle velocity, meaning the shell had to leave the barrel going very fast. So to make a explosive shell for a cannon the designs had to balance explosive payload with the thickness of the shell walls so it could survive being shot. Additionally because the destructive power of the shell was now disconnected with it's speed, meaning a faster shell did not do more damage, cannons were phased out of use and armies switched to howitzers as the dominant form of artillery. Because Howitzers get their range from the angle of their shot rather than muzzle velocity they can shoot shells with more explosive (or other fragile materials like gas) than a cannon can. Additionally Howitzers don't need direct line of sight to hit a target meaning you can now lob shells behind the lee of hills while your safely entrenched behind the lines, and on top of everything else they have longer ranges due to their higher firing arc. Unlike cannons however, hitting anything was more difficult since you are often firing blind at the target and it is impossible to aim directly. Yes, you can use math to put your shell in an area near the a target, but aiming a shell you've just lobbed almost two miles into the air and three miles forward of you to land directly on anything smaller than a castle is pretty much impossible, but of course if you have a HE shell you're more likely to damage the target even if you're off target a bit. Which is why in world war one they used weeks of saturating bombardments to try and destroy fortifications. Though it often did not work, 1,738,000 shells were fired at the German lines before the battle of the Somme and enough Germans were left alive to kill 26,000 of the attacking British (Empire) and French on the first day. What was needed was a way to get a cannon in place to hit a target directly and allow the accurate destruction of fortifications. . . which lead of course to the invention of the [[tank]] and the modern infantry mortar to allow much closer range accurate fire support.

That pretty much leads us to today: though the propellent for modern artillery changes, tactics for Howitzers still have traces of the first world war in them. More and more however gun Artillery are getting a bit out classed. Not as accurate, hard to deploy, with far less range than a plane with a smart bomb and without the ability to barrage a target as hard as rocket systems. Howitzers however still have a role, in video games terms they are the DPM, they don't hit as hard as other weapons, but they can fire for much, much longer. Additionally howitzer shells and guns tubes are very cheap compared to planes with bombs or Multiple rocket launching systems. Cannons remain common and widely in use, but only for tanks at this point. Modern cannons are built to destroy other tanks and leave anti infantry work to their machine guns, and a select amount of special shells like canister or high explosive, but thanks to the cannons higher muzzle velocity, they tend to have HE shells that are much less effective than howitzer shells. Mortars remain very common and are a effective weapon for supporting infantry at close ranges. Their much smaller shell size means it's safer to use them, thanks to their smaller blast radius and their light weight means that you can carry them to where you need them easier.

Between Cannons and Small arms, cannons are the ones more likely to be replaced with a high tech system like a laser or rail gun. The reason the US navy have done rail gun research is only battleships really have the ability to carry the power generators needed to get them to work. However, much like regular firearms, these projects have yet to provide a system that can compete with the power of a chemical reaction since you don't need to "power" them in the same way you do a laser.

== Cannons in Fantasy ==
[[image:Emp great cannon 1434013374.jpg|thumb|300px|right|One of the [[Empire]]'s cannons, proving that you can mix fantasy with gunpowder weapons]]
Fantasy writers are a bit more accommodating to cannons than firearms: in part because they became more practical earlier on. Also they were crew served devices ill suited to use of a single warrior (unless he/she had fantastic powers to begin with) and cannons are the go to solution when someone says "thrilling non modern naval action". Even so there is some reticence about their use as it implies that sooner or latter someone is going to figure "Hey, why don't we take these things and scale them down?".

Many cannons in fantasy settings have some fancypants adornment with bores made into the mouths of roaring lions, dragons and similar and they are rarely even primitive breech loaders. Fantasy authors also have dislike of making their guns out of Bronze since we like the idea of a big black iron gun. Cannons also tend to exist in isolation, you don't see mortars or howitzers for example . Cannons also tend to be somewhat underpowered (compared to their real life counterparts) in settings where they have to coexist with monsters. To put another way, if a cannon can knock a castle down from 490m away, then I don't care how big your dragon is, one direct hit and it will be down for the count. Mind you, getting that direct hit is going to be a bitch and a half and they are not the easier things to lug around.

== Types of cannons ==
Note: for easy of use only list black powder weapons so we don't talk about every gun that ever existed.
*'''Cannons/Howitzers/Mortars''': The difference between these weapons is in how their projectiles are fired. Cannon projectiles follow fairly flat trajectory, Mortars are fired in high steep arcs that drop the round directly onto the targets head, while Howitzers are between the two firing upward but not as steeply as a mortar. These types of artillery are among the few still in use today, with mortars relegated as a portable infantry support weapon, cannons being mounted primarily on armored vehicles, and only howtizers still being used as static weapons.

*'''Quaker "Gun"''': Named after the Quakers, a group of christian pacifists, and alternatively called "Dummy Guns". A Quaker gun is a gun mock-up (typically made of wood), made to look like real guns from a distance in order to deceive enemies you were more threatening than you actually were. Quaker guns found several instances of success throughout the ages and has negated battles that would have otherwise been an easy victory for the opposing side who didn't realize the guns they were scouting were fakes. These were particularly popular in the US civil war and were reported to have been used until WW2 by both the Allies and Axis powers. Advances in modern reconnaissance technology has largely rendered dummy guns ineffective, except in conflicts where the combatants both have low levels of technology.

*'''Disappearing gun''': Guns have recoil; a Disappearing gun uses the recoil to "blow" itself out of the line of fire after it shoots allowing safer reloading and harder counter battery fire on the now out of view gun. Later versions were mounted on retractable platforms for the same effect.

*'''Bombard''': An early cannon, a Bombard is a big iron wide bore cannon that fired massive stone balls at castle walls in order to break them down. Unlike later cannons bombards don't tend to have carriages and have to be fixed in place wooden frames, though a few bombards did have wheels.

*'''Culverins''': 15th and 16th century cannon that fired a ball weighing between 20 and 14 pounds. Used a slow match fuse.
**'''Hongyipao''': The name literally translates to ""red barbarian cannon" and was introduced to Korea and china by the Portuguese, however in most regards it was pretty much just a Culverin.

*'''Chongtong''': Not "really" cannons but this entry was here before the rocket page existed and these were fired out of a cannon. The Congtong was a Korean cannon, or rather, cannons since there was more than one type. The four types were the "Cheonja", "Jija", "Hyeonja", and "Hwangja", the names being roughly equivalent to Cannons A, B, C, and D. The Cheonja was the largest with a 130mm bore able to fire 30 pound rocket out to just over a kilometer. The other three types were pretty much the same, only shrunk down, the Jija had 100mm bore, the Hyeonja, 80mm while the Hwangja was very similar to a European hand cannon. (Wait a minute, barreled weapons that fire self propelled rockets... [[Bolter|Why does that sounds familiar?]])

*'''Saker''': A smaller version of the Culverin from the 16th century that fired a five pound ball.

*'''Minion ''': Minion is the french word for "cute" and it most certainty was. A 17th century version of the Saker it too fired a five pound ball. Used on ships as a weapon to repel boarding parties.

*'''Demi-cannon''': An 18th century cannon that fired a ball less than 42 pounds, while being bigger than the saker. Replaced full cannons in the British navy due to them being too unwieldy. First rate ships (Google it if you're curious what it is, but all you need to know now is that we're talking a big ass ship), mounted 100 such cannons in 50 gun broadsides.

*'''Falconet''': A light cannon that fired a one pound ball. Though invented for land use, it was common on ships and both the Americans and British used them in the revolutionary war. A breech loading version was invented in the 1620's

*'''Carronade''': The mathematical formula to determine how hard something hits with how much force is mass times acceleration. So to get a cannon ball to hit harder you have two options: shoot it faster, or make it bigger. The carronade takes the second option. The carronade was invented by the British navy and they are short, almost sawed off, cannons that fired reduce powder charges, but with a much bigger ball, while the cannon itself was lighter due to being shorter. They had a much reduced range, but god help you if you got broadsided by a ship with a whole side of these.

*'''Canon obusier de 12/Napoleon''': A French gun that revolutionized gunnery when it was invented in 1853. It was portable, yet able to destroy fortifications almost a mile away. Used by the French and both Americas in their civil war and were the last bronze cannons used in an American army.

*'''Parrott rifle''': A US civil war cannon, the Parrott rifle was, well, rifled. What made the Parrott special was that is used iron, not steel, to forge it but had a additional band of iron applied to the breech of the gun to strengthen it. Nevertheless, they had a distressing tendency to burst.

*'''Hook Gun''': Or Hakenbuechse, an oversized musket, that was always classified as an artillery piece, this weapon was popular in 16-18 century Eastern Europe and was usually used either in sieges or as a proto-sniper rifle.

**'''Abus Gun''': An Ottoman artillery piece, similar to a Hook Gun, the Abus gun was small, but still hard to move about and was fired from a tripod and shot a roughly 5 pound cannon ball.

*'''Basilisk''': A medieval big, big gun, the basilisk was a bronze cannon that was ten feet long, weighted up to 4 thousand pounds, had a five inch or 130mm bore (the [[M1 Abrams]] today is armed with a 120mm cannon) and fired a ball up to 160 pounds in weight. The basilisk was too big however, and it was phased out in favor of lighter more maneuverable guns.

*'''Swivel gun''': Essentially small cannons on stick, swivel guns were mostly used on ships and were mounted on the decks. While ineffective against all but the smallest boats, against boarding parties they could be very effective. Thanks to their small size, swivel guns were the first breech loading weapons, with such versions existing by the 16th century.

**'''Pierrier à boîte''': A french breech loading swivel gun made of Wrought iron. The Pierrier à boîte breech, though allowing it to fire more rapidly than other guns, still had issues and had a tendency to leak leading to a loss of power and additional danger to the gunners.

**'''Lantaka''': A (usually) bronze swivel gun developed by the Philippine Moros, firing a half-pound ball or charge of grapeshot. Mounted on the fronts of boats and on the walls of earthwork forts. Saw much use against the Spanish conquistadors, but was defeated by the howitzers and mortars brought by the American infantry.

*'''Double barreled cannon''': An idea that sounds good on the drawing does not always means good in real life. Case in point, US Confederacy double barreled cannon. The idea was to load the guns with chain shot, two cannonballs connected by a chain, and then fire both barrels at the same time, so that the twin cannon balls would fly in such a way that not only would each ball kill the enemy, the chain between the ball would as well. The problem was in step two of the plan, getting both barrels to fire at the same time. To put it simply, it could not. It was tested three times. The first time the balls flew off target and tore up a corn field before the chain broke. The second time it missed again and tore holes in a nearby pine forest "like mowing machine" a witness said. Third time it was fired, the chain broke apart instantly and one ball flew off hitting a chimney, and the other killed a cow. The over optimistic inventor considered these tests a success. That the gun was lost for over ten years and found under a pile of rock speaks to how much the confederates thought of the thing.

*'''Krupp Gun''': Krupp is an old German company that has been making guns and working iron for centuries, but it really made its name known in the mid 19th century when it worked out a system to load a cannon from the rear. The idea of loading a cannon from the breech rather than cramming everything down the muzzle had been toyed around with before, but there had been problems which prevented it from being fully practical. In 1859, Krupp solved these problems by introducing a sliding block system on an all cast steel cannon able to fire explosive shells. Long story short, there was a block in the back of the cannon which could be fastened into place and unfastened and slid out of the way to load it. These guns let Otto von Bismarck unite Germany under his banner and let him beat the muzzle loader using French in the Franco-Prussian War despite the French having better rifles, airships, and primitive machine guns.

*'''System de Bange''': Yes that's it's real name. No, it doesn't mean 'Bang System', instead 'de Bang' was its inventor, [[Skub|though that arguably makes it funnier.]] Essentially a very efficient breech loading system. After the Germans beat them with Breech Loading Cannons, the French wanted their own such guns if those Germans came back. The solution they settled on was to make a cannon with a steel plug which screwed into the back, but with the screw's thread being removed on two quarters of the length of the plug/bore so it could be secured and opened by rotating it 90 degrees with a washer of asbestos to get a good solid seal. The system worked very well and (with a few tweaks) is still in use today.

*'''Armstrong gun''': The Armstrong gun is, like the Bange and Krupp guns, a breech loader. What makes it special was that it was a "built up gun" which means if you cut a Armstrong gun in half, you see that it was built up in layers, an inner barrel made out of a wrought iron or mild steel, surrounded with more wrought iron coils that were shrunk to keep the tube compressed. Though common use for the big guns of the time period's dreadnoughts, it was not as common for smaller pieces. Armstong used a screw breech, so to load the gun you had to open it like the door on a ship by spinning a wheel to unscrew it. Armstrong guns were made in a wide range of calibers, from 6 pound horse guns to 110 naval artillery. Used widely by the British in their colonial wars and Japan in the Boshin War. The most famous Armstrong guns are the 100-ton guns used to defend Malta, capable of obliterating ships that are barely visible over the horizon.

*'''Autocannon''': Essentially an automatically loading gun that is too small to be considered a field gun (i.e. between 20-40mm). Designed for light weight mobile vehicles such as Aircraft and Armored Vehicles that are expected to take on targets either indirectly or of equal (or less) ability. The Autocannon came into it's heyday during the second World War. They commonly come in two flavors. Revolver and Rotary Cannons. With the former having a slightly lower of rate of fire but are less expensive, takes up less space and have a faster spin up time. Chain cannons and their issues are best left aside. The most common Autocannon is the Bofors 40. Just about every country that was involved in World War 2 and the Cold War had their own version of it. At the 40mm size (the bare minimum for artillery) Sabots, HESH and HEAT rounds can damage the armor of Main Battle Tanks and Warships. With a fire rate of 330 rounds per minute.

*'''Licorne''': Meaning 'Unicorn' in French, the Licorne was the earliest form of gun-howitzer and so named due to the unicorns carved into the original models. It didn't really catch on and thus only the Russians used it extensively.

*'''Secret Howitzer''': The result of pure Russian autism and [[Munchkin|min-maxing]]. This 'weapon' was a howitzer modified to have an oval barrel, [[Wat|in the hope that it would spread grapeshot more effectively.]] The drawback was it was useless for any other purpose and not much better at its intended one. Of course, the Russians being who they were, it was decided that the penalty for talking about these guns was to be death, hence the name. [[Fail|This policy becomes more ironic when you discover that the only response to their enemies, the Prussians, finding out about these weapons was a collective WTF and having the captured units melted down for scrap.]]

=== Noncannon guns worth mentioning ===
There have been numerous inventions in the history of firearms that use a cannon's limbers and caissons to mount a weapon that was not quite cannon, and was often used in a way most cannons were not. What they all had in common was that they were all "artillery" in the sense that they were static, mounted firearms that could fuck up enemies in ways that infantry-portable firearms could not, much like your average cannon.

*'''Da Vinci Cannons''': included in this section because, as far as we know, they were never actually built or used in battle. If they were ever used, we have no record of them, and you’d think it would be a big deal if they were successful. The famous inventor Leonardo understood the emerging importance of cannons, and sought to improve on its design. He had an early version of breech-loaders, but like a true mad scientist, that was just the beginning. Not only did he design a triple-barreled cannon, [[Steampunk|steam-powered]] cannons, and his own version of the Ottoman Bombard, but also a ''33-barreled'' cannon that had three rows of 11 small-caliber barrels set on a rotating axle, and each row would be fired in volley by rotating the row into firing position. [[The Empire (Warhammer Fantasy)|Certainly reminds you of a certain gun from a certain tabletop game, doesn't it?]]

*'''Ribauldequin''': Don't ask us how to say it (Ri-bow-de-kin, pretty much like it's written. Just ignore the 'l'). A simpler name is “Organ gun,” because the gun barrel arrangement looks like a pipe organ. The Ribauldequin is troubling to list as a "cannon", since it has a number of small barrels rather than one big one. Rather than a cannon, thinking of it as a bunch of guns on a cannon carriage may be more accurate. Of course, the downside to being able to fire a bunch of guns at once is that, in the age of muzzle-loaders, you had to take even longer to reload it. And compared to having a bunch of guys individually aiming an loading a single barrel, you had maybe one or two guys doing all the loading. Still, if you could take the enemy out in a single volley, or at least create an opening for the rest of your guys, it could be an efffective force-multiplier and morale weapon. After all, it wasn’t called the “infernal machine” for nothing.

*'''Mitrailleuse''': French for "grapeshot" (though thanks to this weapon the word now means machine gun in general) was a weapon that looked like a cannon, only instead of one big hole in the muzzle it had 25 13mm barrels. However, like many such rapid fire weapons, despite working fine, the Mitrailleuse was used and treated like a cannon, not a close support machine gun, and as such it's use in the Franco-Prussian War was less than stellar.

*'''Gatling Gun''': More or less a contemporary of the Maxim Machine Gun, seeing deployment two decades earlier. It is named after a guy who created this pretty cool weapon during the American civil war. It is a heavy weapon firing repeating barrage of bullets on the field. It has a multiple barrel which each barrel takes its turn to fire everytime they rotate in a cylinder fashion. This configuration allowed higher rates of fire to be achieved without the barrel overheating and the basic weapon would eventually be coupled with a motor to allow for so high a rate of fire that each of the guns "dakkas" blur into each other to become one long "BZZZZZZZZZZZZ". The earliest gatling gun however required a person to crank it like a pepper grinder, so it's not like it can be fired automatically by some sandwich eating Russian. It was mounted on a cannon's two wheel cart, or Caisson, that generally required horses to move it over long distance. When first invented, the Gatling gun had some teething issues due to the paper cartridges of the day, but once metal ones were invented the Gatling gun quickly hit its stride. Notable for its use in Zulu and the Boshin war, slaughtering those <s>pre-historical savages</s> unlucky per-industrial indigenous like no tomorrow. Electric versions of the gating gun existed before their widespread use in aircraft, but at the time, only naval warships were able to have portable electric generators, limiting their use. While modern machine gun mechanisms have largely replaced the Gatling gun as a main weapon, the Gatling design is still used for weapons that require a very high rate of fire, [[A-10_Warthog|particularly aircraft]].

*'''Puckle Gun''': Possibly the earliest repeating revolver; invented in 1718, before the gatling gun mentioned above. Just like the Gatling gun, it required a person to crank it like a pepper grinder. It was desired for use by the [[ecclesiarchy|Christians]] to slaughter the [[heresy|false believers]] like the Muslim Turks and it had a choice of round bullets for use against fellow Christians and square bullets that were considered to be more damaging. The Puckle gun however was unpopular because of its some what finicky flint lock and other mechanical issues, since it was revolver made 100 years before colt made his first revolver in a calibre over three times bigger. The technology to allow this sort of weapon was not there yet, which made its feasibility even worse when you allow religious fucktards to overcomplicate military logistics by demanding two different ammunitions which have absolutely no difference, unlike [[Bolter]] shell variations.

*'''Dynamite gun''': In the early days of high explosives, there were no explosives stable enough to be fired from a gun without blowing up, and high explosives were far more powerful than low explosives like gunpowder. Hence, the Dynamite gun, the most steam punk weapon ever deployed. Dynamite guns worked like a big air gun, only instead of a BB they fired a shell full of Dynamite or other high explosives and instead of air they used compressed steam if on a ship, or smokeless powder used to indirectly propel a gas into the barrel to launch the shell.

*''' Maxim gun''' The first successful weapon that can be considered a machine gun and one of the earliest recoil operated weapons. As such the origins of the autocannon can be easily traced back to the Maxim. When it was scaled up for larger calibers. QF 1-pounder pompoms(37mm) and the QF 2-pounders(40mm) were adopted by nations as soon as they were aware of them or had been on the receiving end, essentially converting the machine gun design into auto cannons. The QF 1 started out as a field gun before it was used on warships as an anti aircraft weapon, Just like the Gatling gun years earlier. The Maxim along with it's descendants made field charges and line combat impossible, ushering in the era of trench warfare, with only [[Katanas_are_Underpowered_in_d20|mall ninjas]] and [[/pol/|other idiots]] lamenting the loss of those tactics.

== Types of cannon ammunition==
*'''Round Shot''': the first type of cannon ammo, Round shot is, as the name suggests, a round ball made of either stone or later iron. Don't knock a Stone Cannon ball because on impact they have a tendency shatter producing shrapnel. Round shot was best used against fortifications and infantry in the open. When firing at infantry the ideal use of round shot was to fire just in front of the infantry and let the ball bounce up and through the formation like a bowling ball from hell. This is replicated in cannon mechanics in Warhammer fantasy. This is also one of the reasons why armies stopped fighting in deep formations and switched to lines.
**'''Hot Shot''': Against wooden ships that were full of black powder and other flammables, often the best solution is to light them on fire. As such an attempt to do this was to take an iron cannon ball, and heat it up so that it glowed red and then fire it. . .carefully. As you can imagine sticking a red hot cannon ball down the barrel of an iron tube full of explosive was careful work in order to pull it off they had to put a plug of wet clay between the ball and the powder. This is word is the modern origin for the term "Hot Shot" as some one who is renowned for their skill and courage- like the people who could load said red hot cannonballs without blowing themselves up in the process.

*'''Chain shot''': used mostly at sea, Chain shot was either two small cannon balls linked with chain, or one single cannon ball that broke into two halves connected by a chain after firing. Chain shot covered a larger area and was used to target the rigging of enemy ships (though as the tv series 'The Borgias' shows, it could also be quite useful in mowing down infantry). As steamships become more common however, chain shot became less and less useful.

*'''Canister shot''': Canisters shot is a collection of small iron musket balls, that was jammed down the barrel in a tin can. Upon firing it turned the cannon into a massive shotgun, spraying the area in front of it with hundreds of musket ball; in a day and age where fighting was done shoulder to shoulder, Canister shot was lethal. '''Grape shot''' was similar but used bigger balls and was loaded in a bag, not a can (supposedly the bulges the balls made in the bag looked like a bunch of grapes, hence the name) and was more common on ships since it could better punch though wooden hulls. A cannon loaded with canister shot could and has stopped an infantry charge dead in its tracks. Canister rounds were made all the way to the modern age, and in many cases are still used for clearing out infantry at close range, but only with special tank cannons. For the same reason shotguns are smoothbore, rifled cannons have problems with canister shot since the grooves impart spin on the balls. However, the use of smoothbore cannons in modern anti-tank guns, canister shot is now a more viable weapon. Artillery-style canister shot, however, fell out of fashion even in the days of smoothbore field artillery in favor of...

*'''Shrapnel rounds''': You know how a person invents a thing and get his name attached to the invention so completely that if you tried to use it today as a name it just sounds strange? Well Henry Shrapnel was so successful with his invention that all types of flying debris now has his name. Shrapnel rounds were invented in 1784, and they're basically canister shot, with a fuse so that the shell explodes in mid air rather then only at the muzzle of the gun almost tripling the range of the anti personal round. Round shot for use against infantry became a thing of the past. Shrapnel rounds were used all the way up to the modern age and some countries still make Shrapnel rounds for their tanks.

*'''Shells''': A bullet that's hollow and has stuff in it. Typically explosives but chemical payloads are also known. While Shells have been known to exist ever since the 14th century, it was not until the modern day when accurate fuses came about that Shells became more common then solid shot. Shells come in a wide variety of munition types, but the most common versions are High Explosive, Armor-Piercing, High-Explosive Anti-Tank (combines HE with a shaped charge), and even guided shells.

*'''Carcass shot''': No, not something a [[Awesome|necromancer with a cannon]] would use. Carcass shot was a high flammable material with an iron shell around it and some vents to spray the chemical after firing. it was called Carcass shot because, supposedly, the shot looked like a human Carcass thanks to the holes. Carcass shot was used mostly out of lower velocity mortars and Howitzers and was one of the first chemical weapons to be used. It was especially useful at night as the glow allowed it to be used to spot for the gun.

*'''Junk''': Obviously if you're out of proper ammunition you could just shove anything you want down the barrel and hope it works. Supposedly a Uruguayan ship fired stale cheese out one of their cannons and shattered the mast of a Brazilian ship. Blunderbusses and similar man-portable weapons could also be loaded with scrap when nothing better was available. Contrarily to the common portrayal, however, the practice was discouraged as it would quickly wear the barrel of the weapon out and render it unusable.

*'''High Velocity Armor Piercing (HVAP)''': Also known as Armor-Piercing Composite Rigid (APCR) if you're a Brit or 'Hartkern' (hard core) if you're German. When World War 2 and its bigger and bigger tanks that could shrug off the fire from small calibre cannons came along, all nations were faced with the same problem of stopping those monsters. Without going into the physics of it, there were three solutions to the problem. First, the time-honored one of bringing a bigger gun, but that was often impossible. Second, lengthen the barrel of the gun so the gases can impart more energy to the projectile, but again this was limited in its execution. Third, make the projectile itself out of heavier, tougher material. That's HVAP/APCR/Hartkern. Same overall shell size, but the weight of the projectile is 'concentrated' in a smaller core made out of tungsten fitted with a lightweight aerodynamic cap that will do more damage than a larger, softer shot.

*'''Sabot (Old)''': Sabots (french for clogshoe and pronounced like "Sah-bo") were used in the 19th century with weapons like the Paixhans gun, one of the first naval guns designed to fire an explosive shell. A sabot is a container made of a light material that fits the barrel and contains the actual munition but falls away after leaving the barrel, leaving just the sub munition to fly toward the target. It was used to center the projectile and trap the gases of the explosion behind it, allowing to fire a shell smaller then the diameter of the gun (shooting a 20mm shell out of a 40mm cannon for example) and also back in the days to prevent a catastrophic explosion of the shell along with the powder. Advances in metallurgy and the invention of the driving band (and the generalized use of copper casings for smaller weapons) have made such sabots obsolete. Buuuuut...

*'''Sabot (Modern)''': Remember the HVAP above, where we said 'core made out of hard material to deal more damage'? Well the modern sabot rounds take this one level further. A small, very heavy projectile is encased in a much bigger shell casing, and the whole casing is discarded the moment it exits the barrel leaving only the core to fly toward the target. This allows the small core to be fired from a substantially large-bore gun, giving it a lot of kinetic energy while avoiding the poor ballistics of such a large shot. This has led to modern main battle tanks being armed with a 120mm cannon while shooting what basically amounts to a ballista bolt made of depleted uranium or tungsten at one another. Sabots are frequently used for armor-penetrating rounds that would be far too heavy to fire at full-size. When used against soft targets like car bombs, they tend to swiss cheese them.

*'''High-Explosive Anti-Tank (HEAT)/High-Explosive Anti-Tank Fin-Stabilized (HEAT-FS)''': A modern round (it was introduced in WW2) that uses the Munroe effect to defeat hevily-armored targets, like a tank. In essence, all the force of the explosion is concentrated into a 'jet' that forces/melts/vaporizes its way through the armor and incinerates anything behind. These rounds were developed spocifically to deal with tanks, and while extremely effective, they have the drawback of needing to detonate at just the right distance and angle from their target to be effective. the fin-stabilized version is a later improvement that (as the name indicates) uses fins to stabilize the shell's flight and improve the chance of hitting at exactly said right angle/distance.

*'''Tandem Charge''': HEAT, when introduced, was a game changer and everyone scrambled to find ways to protect their tanks from them. The counterspell to the opponent's counterspell, a tandem charge is exactly what its name implies: a first small HE charge fucks up whatever HEAT countermeasures are installed to allow the secondary HEAT charge to strike true. It has since been broadened to different combinations of charges for different applications, but the general idea is always the same. [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q6j9wEF1sf8 See here for a demonstration of a builing-clearing AP/HE combo.]

{{MedievalWeaponry}}

Trap

2020-08-29T20:32:40Z

2A02:1811:5180:A200:EC3D:29FD:FA1D:618: Undo revision 690532 by Saarlacfunkel (talk)

[[Image:Ackbar.jpg|thumb|right|The quote that made Admiral Ackbar legendary.]]

A '''trap''' is a form of underhanded attack intended to catch targets off-guard, granting the trapper the initiative and advantage over their opponent. Traps can also be security features designed to prevent entry into certain areas by making sure that trekking through them is a perilous affair.

Speaking of affairs, the beardiest of us have established that a woman is the perfect physical representation, the definition, of a trap. Not always deadly, but definitely the most effective, as there is no possible way of freeing yourself without internal or external damage.

In-game, traps can either be devices designed to strike opponents unexpectedly like pitfalls and landmines, cunning tactics like ambushes and assassinations, or fighting moves like riposte or feinting. The main gist of traps, however, is that they must not be discovered before they are needed. Otherwise, most people can avoid traps and render them useless before they do their work. It may even work against the trapper and put themselves in a dangerous position instead.

In RPGs, a trap can either be a devilishly evil contraption that the GM placed into a campaign to trick the players or to somehow outsmart them (and hopefully kill them later) or a piss poor trick that a lobotomized retard could see right through.

A rather badass type of trap is a bear trap; either a pair of spring loaded mechanical jaws, or a trap that releases a hungry bear.

==In DnD==
Traps are a staple in [[Dungeons & Dragons]]. They can take the form of anything from a spring loaded blade on a door, a pit full of spikes covered up by a net, an illusory wall or many others. It is generally used to screw with the players. The [[rogue]] in 3.5 and down is, pretty much, the only class that can deal with them, while in [[4e]] anyone can effectively if they choose to work on that [[Skills|skill]]. [[Dungeons & Dragons 5th Edition|The latest edition]] lets anyone with thieves' tools proficiency go to work on 'em, though rogues and bards both get specialized tricks to make them ''best'' at it.

==IRL==
[[Image:And so it is written.png|thumb|right|Remember, there's nothing wrong with liking dicks.]]
[[File:Trapfumeme.jpg|thumb|right|Like actual traps: its successful if you fell for it before you noticed it was too late.]]
Traps have become a widespread term used in places like /a/, /b/, /cm/, [[/d/]], and /h/ to describe young crossdressing males, who outwardly appear to be a cute girl. The trope has slowly but surely gained more and more popularity in [[anime|anime]] over the years, and has [[skub|divided the fans']] stance on the topic, with some staunch detractors and adherents from all walks of life.

Less common is the "reverse trap": an extremely tomboyish girl whose generally small curves allows her to, intentionally or otherwise, pass herself off as a man.

The [[Weeaboo|Japanese]] term for this is 男の娘 (''otoko no ko''), literally "daughter that is male" (not "Daughter of Man," it's a common newbie mistake to think "no" always means "of"). This is a pun on 男の子, which is pronounced the same, but is just a catch-all term for "boy", literally meaning "child that is male".

[[Category:Roleplaying]]
[[Category:Meme]]

AMX-30

2020-08-29T12:27:51Z

2A02:1811:5180:A200:EC3D:29FD:FA1D:618: /* IRL */

[[File:TFRAB1-04.jpg|right|300px|thumb|Le deh de gloire est arrivé!]]
{{topquote|Take care that none of them escapes.|Charlemagne}}

Unfortunately for the French, their tank was the red-headed stepchild of the NATO family and has the worst traits of the Chieftain and the Leopard. Thankfully, these stepchildren come in droves and serve as the NATO counterpart of the East German tank hordes.

==In Team Yankee==
[[file:TFRAB1-32.jpg|left|300px|thumb|Les stats, Monsieur]]

The AMX-30 is the main tank for the French army, who decided that a tank should be killing units and rolling about rather than tanking for the rest of the battlegroup.

Constructed using steel and chiffon, it has a side armor of 4 and lacks bazooka skirts, meaning side shots from light anti-tank weapons (LAWs, RPG-18s) will automatically penetrate while massed autocannons will eventually go through; 6 shots are needed at point-blank range to reliably kill one tank. It is also much more vulnerable to artillery than any other tank, with only 1 top armour making it as durable as an M113.

The AMX-30 is the most spammable tank for NATO at the moment. Cheaper than the ANZAC and Canadian Leopard 1s, you can bring 3 tanks for 8 points or 4 tanks for 10 points, while your HQ platoon can only take 1 command tank at 2 points. If you decided that PACT tactics and NATO equipment are for you, French armoured squadrons will fill that niche very nicely.

While AT19 without HEAT will find it impossible to destroy any 3rd Generation tanks (but will ignore Chobham, BDD or skirts on side shots compared to the [[AMX-10 RC]]), it will serve nicely when engaging most 2nd generation tanks (T-55s, M60s, Leopard 1s) while turning light armoured units inside out. Brutal guns allow massed AMX-30 fire to pulverize infantry platoons, even if they are dug in. Unfortunately, their ROF drops from 2 to 1 when moving and so you should use these units as stationary pillboxes for maximum hurt. They also lack stabilizers, so moving above 10 inches means no shots whatsoever.

Compared to the AMX-10RC, the AMX-30 loses ''Scout'' and ''Spearhead'', but gains enough armour to take a peppering of artillery or autocannon fire. The main gun also loses HEAT, meaning that anti-tank duties will probably require you to get in close unless going for side shots. This is perhaps a bit odd since the AMX-30 was armed with an advanced (for the time) HEAT round known as ''"Obus G"''. You do also get an autocannon of your own with ''Anti-Helicopter'', perfect against infantry in the open, helicopters, soft-skinned vehicles or anything that you'd rather suppress than murder.

Notably, the AMX-30 has one of the worst cross ratings of NATO tanks at 4+. Do not expect them to get through rough terrain without breaking down.

As with other French units, do not let them take casualties unless you can justify losing the unit. Use your superior firepower to deliver the alpha strike and keep attacking: the French are at their weakest when enemies can shoot back.

==IRL==

You might wonder why the French didn't (and don't) use the same Leopard tanks most of Europe does. The Leopard has rightfully earned its place in history as a Damn Fine Tank that in part defined what a second generation MBT should be like. Also, if all of NATO shared a tank it would make ammo and parts much easier to get if the commies did come a-knockin'. So why reinvent the wheel and not just use the German tank? Between 1940 to 1945, they ''did'' just use German tanks. Advances in armor design rendered all French tanks in service in 1940 obsolete, not to mention France <s>surrendered immediately</s> got overrun in a hurry, compelling Free French troops to make do with whatever they could get their hands on, from American M4 Shermans to German Panthers. There was even at least one Tiger I that was captured, turned around, and used by its Free French crew as they fought all the way to the German border.

[[File:Amx30-amx30 01.jpg|300px|right|thumb|Pierre, I think we're lost....]]

The answer to that is rather complex, but if you oversimplify just a bit, the main part of it is a certain General Charles de Gaulle. De Gaulle... hated Germans, despised the English and was adamant his France would *not* become an American protectorate like Roosevelt had envisioned at first (leading to some major political clashes during WWII, but that's another story). The embarrassment of World War II combined with that legendary French pride meant that the French Army insisted that any new French tank (or globally materiel) would be a FRENCH tank (materiel), built by Frenchmen in France (in the city of Roanne for the tanks, to be exact). It is a testimony to their stubbornness that to this day, France is one of the very few countries with their own tanks, airplanes, carrier, subs and nukes; so it did somewhat pay off in the end (at the cost of being seen as insufferable cunts by NATO, but I digress again...)

Back to post-WWII: their first attempt at an indigenous tank, the ARL-44, was a failure: too big, too heavy, not enough firepower, not integrating the many design advances from the war. De Gaulle had to swallow his pride and make do with 'secondhand American cast-offs' (his words) for a while, the french army being equipped with Pattons at first. But the French are nothing if stubborn and eventually they managed to come up with two solid designs: the AMX-13 light tank and the AMX-30 MBT. The AMX-30 is so far the only NATO tank with an Autoloader (something the French were forerunners in), at least till the Leclerc tank came around 1991. The vehicle's armour is light, as it was designed in the heyday of the HEAT round, when it was thought that the best way to prevent <s>HEAT death</s> death to HEAT was to not get hit: hence the need for speed.

You might expect at this point for us to mention how ''"the AMX-30 was not the most modern tank in the French arsenal and to expect another one"'', the way we do on the T-72 and Chieftain pages, but the thing is: the AMX-30 was the most modern tank France had in 1985. The AMX-30's replacement was the AMX-56 Leclerc(shortened to just the Leclerc), which was introduced in 1993. At first glance this might seem to suggest that the French are out of luck as far as new models go, but that's not quite correct. In 1983 the Franks produced a prototype tank, the AMX-40 (the main difference between the AMX-40 and the AMX-30 is that the former was supposed to have a 120mm gun), which never took off in our timeline, but with a Soviet Union invasion could actually see the light of day in Team Yankee.

{{French Forces in Team Yankee}}

[[Category:Vehicles]]

BRDM-2

2020-08-29T10:44:52Z

2A02:1811:5180:A200:EC3D:29FD:FA1D:618: /* IRL */

[[File:BRDM-2.jpg|300px|right|thumb|Its like a boat and a Russian car had a one night stand.]]
The '''"Boyevaya Razvedyvatelnaya Dozornaya Mashina-2"''' or "'''BRDM-2'''" for short, is a Soviet-made amphibious scout car. A good example of Soviet design doctrine: equipment designed for a specific purpose that it accomplishes well, but nothing more; it was an improvement over it's predecessor the "BRDM-1". The "BRDM-2" was fully sealed to allow it to operate in NBC environments, came with a sealed turret, and had more options for electronic equipment to allow it to do it's job better. While it could technically be operated by only 1 person at the wheel (or two if the gun is needed), it's combat crew consisted of 4 people: driver, assistant driver (read: radio operator), gunner and tank commander to coordinate the whole; just like in a tank.

==In Team Yankee==
[[File:BRDM-2 Stats.jpg|300px|left|thumb|Da Stats]]

The BRDM-2 is a passive recon unit open to all PACT forces with one job: expand your deployment area and bail out immediately afterwards.

At a piddly 1-2 points for 2-4 BRDMs, you get a scout car that has a measly frontal armour of 1, armed with a 14.5 MG. The lack of armament and small unit size means that this is an easy kill point for your opponent, especially without the scout special rule. It does have AT5 which can cut through artillery pieces, but using them on the offensive is very situational.

Depending on your playstyle, you may prefer BMP recce if you want all your units to have the chance of making their points back or contributing to the battle as it goes on. If you simply need recon as cheaply as possible, the BRDM-2 is unit for you. Note that you may not take both: a battalion has a single recon platoon slot and you can either get a BRDM or BMP-1 Recon platoon (or BMP-2 if you are playing the Soviets.)

As utility units, you are buying these for their special rules and NOT the weapons they bring to the table. Keep them out of sight and get the hell out of there as soon as possible.

==IRL==
[[File:BRDM-2 IRL.jpg|300px|right|thumb|'Comrade, is we lost again?']]
Weighing in only at 7 tons, the BRDM-2's V8 engine was capable of propelling it to speeds 100km/h on solid land (and 10km/h when wading through water), easily allowing it to traverse the terrain with ease to monitor enemy positions and movement. However, as it's main shtick was speed, rather than combat, it's armour is woefully lacking and the only weapons it had were a 14.5mm heavy machine-gun and co-axial 7.62mm medium machine gun, so at best it was only reliably capable of engaging other scout vehicles or infantry (who were not lucky enough to bring anti-armour weapons, at least. Although even then, grenades and AP rounds loaded in their rifles could still potentially wreck a BRDM if shot in it's weaker sides). That said, it was fast enough that what it couldn't out-gun it could out-run instead; and it was exactly what it was supposed to do in case it came under fire: leg it and report the enemy's position to the rest of the Soviet forces!

On a sidenote: despite being introduced in 1962, the BRDM-2 is still going strong today, almost sixty years later. Some countries still use the modernised version as scout cars, others have used the sturdy and proven base to create lightweight ATGM carriers and/or point-defense AA vehicles.

{{Soviet Forces in Team Yankee}}
{{East German Forces in Team Yankee}}
{{Polish Forces in Team Yankee}}
{{Czech Forces in Team Yankee}}
{{Iraqi Forces in Team Yankee}}

[[Category:Vehicles]]

BRDM-2

2020-08-29T10:31:25Z

2A02:1811:5180:A200:EC3D:29FD:FA1D:618: /* IRL */

[[File:BRDM-2.jpg|300px|right|thumb|Its like a boat and a Russian car had a one night stand.]]
The '''"Boyevaya Razvedyvatelnaya Dozornaya Mashina-2"''' or "'''BRDM-2'''" for short, is a Soviet-made amphibious scout car. A good example of Soviet design doctrine: equipment designed for a specific purpose that it accomplishes well, but nothing more; it was an improvement over it's predecessor the "BRDM-1". The "BRDM-2" was fully sealed to allow it to operate in NBC environments, came with a sealed turret, and had more options for electronic equipment to allow it to do it's job better. While it could technically be operated by only 1 person at the wheel (or two if the gun is needed), it's combat crew consisted of 4 people: driver, assistant driver (read: radio operator), gunner and tank commander to coordinate the whole; just like in a tank.

==In Team Yankee==
[[File:BRDM-2 Stats.jpg|300px|left|thumb|Da Stats]]

The BRDM-2 is a passive recon unit open to all PACT forces with one job: expand your deployment area and bail out immediately afterwards.

At a piddly 1-2 points for 2-4 BRDMs, you get a scout car that has a measly frontal armour of 1, armed with a 14.5 MG. The lack of armament and small unit size means that this is an easy kill point for your opponent, especially without the scout special rule. It does have AT5 which can cut through artillery pieces, but using them on the offensive is very situational.

Depending on your playstyle, you may prefer BMP recce if you want all your units to have the chance of making their points back or contributing to the battle as it goes on. If you simply need recon as cheaply as possible, the BRDM-2 is unit for you. Note that you may not take both: a battalion has a single recon platoon slot and you can either get a BRDM or BMP-1 Recon platoon (or BMP-2 if you are playing the Soviets.)

As utility units, you are buying these for their special rules and NOT the weapons they bring to the table. Keep them out of sight and get the hell out of there as soon as possible.

==IRL==
[[File:BRDM-2 IRL.jpg|300px|right|thumb|'Comrade, is we lost again?']]
Weighing in only at 7 tons, the BRDM-2's V8 engine was capable of propelling it to speeds 100km/h on solid land (and 10km/h when wading through water), easily allowing it to traverse the terrain with ease to monitor enemy positions and movement. However, as it's main shtick was speed, rather than combat, it's armour is woefully lacking and the only weapons it had were a 14.5mm heavy machine-gun and co-axial 7.62mm medium machine gun, so at best it was only reliably capable of engaging other scout vehicles or infantry (who were not lucky enough to bring anti-armour weapons, at least. Although even then, grenades and AP rounds loaded in their rifles could still potentially wreck a BRDM if shot in it's weaker sides). That said, it was fast enough that what it couldn't out-gun it could out-run instead; and it was exactly what it was supposed to do in case it came under fire: leg it and report the enemy's position to the rest of the Soviet forces!

{{Soviet Forces in Team Yankee}}
{{East German Forces in Team Yankee}}
{{Polish Forces in Team Yankee}}
{{Czech Forces in Team Yankee}}
{{Iraqi Forces in Team Yankee}}

[[Category:Vehicles]]

BRDM-2

2020-08-29T10:31:13Z

2A02:1811:5180:A200:EC3D:29FD:FA1D:618: /* IRL */

[[File:BRDM-2.jpg|300px|right|thumb|Its like a boat and a Russian car had a one night stand.]]
The '''"Boyevaya Razvedyvatelnaya Dozornaya Mashina-2"''' or "'''BRDM-2'''" for short, is a Soviet-made amphibious scout car. A good example of Soviet design doctrine: equipment designed for a specific purpose that it accomplishes well, but nothing more; it was an improvement over it's predecessor the "BRDM-1". The "BRDM-2" was fully sealed to allow it to operate in NBC environments, came with a sealed turret, and had more options for electronic equipment to allow it to do it's job better. While it could technically be operated by only 1 person at the wheel (or two if the gun is needed), it's combat crew consisted of 4 people: driver, assistant driver (read: radio operator), gunner and tank commander to coordinate the whole; just like in a tank.

==In Team Yankee==
[[File:BRDM-2 Stats.jpg|300px|left|thumb|Da Stats]]

The BRDM-2 is a passive recon unit open to all PACT forces with one job: expand your deployment area and bail out immediately afterwards.

At a piddly 1-2 points for 2-4 BRDMs, you get a scout car that has a measly frontal armour of 1, armed with a 14.5 MG. The lack of armament and small unit size means that this is an easy kill point for your opponent, especially without the scout special rule. It does have AT5 which can cut through artillery pieces, but using them on the offensive is very situational.

Depending on your playstyle, you may prefer BMP recce if you want all your units to have the chance of making their points back or contributing to the battle as it goes on. If you simply need recon as cheaply as possible, the BRDM-2 is unit for you. Note that you may not take both: a battalion has a single recon platoon slot and you can either get a BRDM or BMP-1 Recon platoon (or BMP-2 if you are playing the Soviets.)

As utility units, you are buying these for their special rules and NOT the weapons they bring to the table. Keep them out of sight and get the hell out of there as soon as possible.

==IRL==
[[File:BRDM-2 IRL.jpg|300px|right|thumb|'Comrade, is we lost again?']]
Weighing in only at 7 tons, the BRDM-2's V8 engine was capable of propelling it to speeds 100km/h on solid land (and 10km/h when wading through water), easily allowing it to traverse the terrain with ease to monitor enemy positions and movement. However, as it's main shtick was speed, rather than combat, it's armour is woefully lacking and the only weapons it had were a 14.5mm heavy machine-gun and co-axial 7.62mm medium machine gun, so at best it was only reliably capable of engaging other scout vehicles or infantry (who were not lucky enough to bring anti-armour weapons, at least. Although even then, grenades and AP rounds loaded in their rifles could still potentially wreck a BRDM if shot in it's weaker sides). That said, it was fast enough that what it couldn't out-gun it could out-run instead; and it was exactly what it was supposed to do in case it came under fire: leg it an report the enemy's position to the rest of the Soviet forces!

{{Soviet Forces in Team Yankee}}
{{East German Forces in Team Yankee}}
{{Polish Forces in Team Yankee}}
{{Czech Forces in Team Yankee}}
{{Iraqi Forces in Team Yankee}}

[[Category:Vehicles]]