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Cult of the Redemption

2018-01-09T14:31:21Z

2A02:587:3A0A:6B00:E088:4BA2:4059:3AB1:

[[Image:Warhammer40k theredeemer 001.jpg|thumb|right|Thought [[Chick Tracts|Jack Chick]] was bad? '''GUESS AGAIN''']]

The '''Cult of the Redemption''' is one of the few signs that [[Warhammer 40,000]] still accepts that it has an understanding of the phrase "excessive", as the Cult of the Redemption is considered an extremist branch of the [[Imperial Cult]].

==Founding==
Formed on [[Necromunda]], the Redemptionists took a good look at the [[Hive]] they were living in and came to a rational decision for the first time in millennia: they realized that this place was ''Hell''.

Unfortunately, they stopped thinking clearly after that, as they soon decided that humanity was inherently evil (which is [[Humanity Fuck Yeah|open for debate]]) and could only find redemption in the eyes of the [[God-Emperor of Mankind|God-Emperor]] by killing all his enemies: In other words, [[psyker]]s, [[mutant]]s, and [[heretic]]s (which is anyone who decides to work against the Cult or its members). Unfortunately, the Redemption does not stop at mutants, witches, and heretics. Whenever Redemptionists manage to seize power, they immediately go on a psychotic killing spree, slaughtering the recognized mutant populations (which angers the administratum because it means that factories lose cheap labor), the Ecclesiarch priests (for not being part of the Redemption), nearly all officials (including the planetary Governor) for "Allowing Mutants and Heretics to Flourish", and even go on to attack and slaughter the Astropath Choir of the planet.

On Necromunda, they ended up finding a home in House Cawdor, where it became the official religion of the House.

===Diaspora===
Though originally confined to Necromunda, the Redemption Cult soon spread across the [[Imperium of Man]] thanks to members of the [[Ecclesiarchy]]. [[Commissar]] [[Ciaphas Cain]], '''HERO OF THE IMPERIUM''', noted in the novel ''The Traitor's Hand'' that there was a Redemptionist preacher on Adumbria, and believed his old [[Schola Progenium]] classmate Tomas Beije was either a member of the Cult, or at the very least a sympathizer.

The Ecclesiarchy has occasionally tried to use Redemptionist Zealots as a means to get around the Decree Passive preventing them from having "men under arms" and limiting their military forces to the [[Sisters of Battle]]. (<s>Emperor's balls, now even the Ecclesiarchy doesn't want the Nuns with Guns.</s> {{blam|FWOOSH! Silence, heretic! The Ecclesiarchy wants more warriors ''beside'' the noble women of the Adepta Sororitas to purge the unclean in holy flame!}}) In the novel ''Legion of the Damned'', a group of Ecclesiarchs end up getting into a pissing match with the [[Excoriators]] over authority long enough for the Marines to get bored and BLAM several Redemptionist militants.

[[Image:Mavel.jpg|2000px|thumb|left|Marvel Heroes of the 3rd Millenium Imperium]]

==Teachings==
The Cult of Redemption believes that the God-Emperor of Mankind is manifest proof of [[Humanity Fuck Yeah|mankind’s holy destiny to rule the stars]], but as they comprise of mostly poor citizens with limited education they very rarely factor in what the [[Xenos]] have to say upon the matter.
In their minds, the only thing keeping mankind from its destiny is its own sinfulness. So they take it upon themselves to "remove" the sins which are holding back mankind.

Crucially, the Redemption believes that three sins surpass all others:
*[[Mutant|Mutation]] is sin and corruption made manifest on the human body.
*[[Psyker|Witchcraft]] is the ability to use unnatural powers.
*[[Heresy]] is refusing the truth of the Redemption, which pretty much encompasses everyone not part of the Cult.

Redemptionists "on business" are relatively uniform wherever they appear, with a particular tendency to wear the colour red and full face concealing KKK masks and have a preference for wielding flame or chain weapons. Though when not on the job they can appear just as typical as the next Imperial citizen, though perhaps with a heightened sense of irritability and racism over and above that of your average Joe living in the 41st Millennium.

===The Ludmillan Dictates===
Someone in the [[Dark Heresy|Calixis Sector]] actually took the time to sit down and codify how Redemptionists need to behave, essentially turning the Cult from a slightly crazy social gathering of religious nutballs into an organised sect.

The ''(paraphrased)'' rules are as follows:
*Red is the colour of blood and therefore the colour of the Redemption.
*"Drugs are Bad M'Kay?" taking [[drug]]s is a sin, punishable by death.
*"Suffer not the Witch to live" punish them with death
*"Suffer not the Mutant to live" punish them with death
*"Suffer not the Heretic to live" make them [[Asmodai|repent]], then punish them with death
*When punishing sinners with death, you should wear red as it is the colour of the Redemption.
*When you take up the weapons of the Emperor, you are on His time and not your own, so [[Ninja|hide your face]].
*Self-Mortification should be done daily, as [[meme|it is a good pain]].

==Organisation==
There is no hard and fast "rule" when it comes to how the Redemption is organised, as the cult is not officially recognised by the Imperium at large its members can be drawn from all walks of life. In addition, very few individuals devote 100% of their time to the Redemption and take it up as their main vocation of choice, instead donning the hood whenever secretive meetings are held and returning to their original life leaving their friends and employers none the wiser.

===Necromunda (1995)===
Mechanically, they acted quite different from most other gangs both on the tabletop and in the between game phases:

'''Firstly''', they may never acquire territory like other gangs, due to the fact that its members may be members of other gangs in houses, or have commitments when they take the hood off. This means their income is entirely based on donations. This is actually useful to a player in some ways, because it negates the need to feed and shelter your cultists because they can eat at home, removing some of the paperwork. Unfortunately it does mean that credits come to you in a slow trickle and you may not be able to afford nice things.
'''Secondly,''' thanks to the huge number of faithful waiting for the opportunity to don the hood and start burning heretics, there is the possibility that you can get new gangers without having to pay for them. Whenever a ganger ''(of any type)'' dies, there is a 50% chance that a new devotee with a knife will join you for free.
'''Thirdly,''' they ''Hate'' Mutants, Psykers, Ghouls and Zombies, and they may not use hired guns of any kind unless the particular rules say so. Redemptionists are insular like that.
'''Fourthly,''' they may not ransom or exchange captured prisoners. They burn them at the stake unless the opposing player can mount a rescue mission. Having a Priest in your gang gives you the option to convert some captured gangers, but if that fails they'll burn the heretic anyway.

The unit types for Redemptionist Gangs are as follows:
*'''Priests:''' your typical gang leader. Gets access to the best stuff and all skill advance trees, comes with the ability to inspire his gang and convert captured enemies.
*'''Deacons:''' the right hand man of the Priest. Come with fewer skill trees than he does and have no special rules. However they do get access to the same range of equipment, and the Techno tree, meaning they are similar to Heavies in other gangs.
*'''Crusaders:''' your basic ganger, get access to basic weapons.
*'''Devotees:''' your Juvies - are shit, have access to fewer weapons than most other gangs and can only take skills from the ''Ferocity'' tree, unless they roll 2 or 12 on the advance table.
*'''Zealots:''' Psycho nut-jobs whose only purpose in life is to [[Rip and Tear]] heretics. Can only take from an exclusive list of melee weapons ''(which include [[Awesome|Eviscerators]])'' and they suffer ''Frenzy'', doubling their attacks but reducing your overall control of them.

There are two ways to build up your Redemptionist gang, and one could turn into the other several times throughout a campaign.

If you have a '''Priest''' then the gang becomes a '''Crusade''' and you are allowed to take '''Deacons''' who can buy from a larger list of ranged and special weapons, giving your gang much more versatility rather than "beat it to death". Having a Priest also allows you to use "Inspirations", which are practically a poor man's [[Sisters of Battle|Act of Faith]]. Allowing you to recover one ganger from pinning, reroll a failed leadership check or re-roll a recovery check once per turn. If you are running a Crusade, you must have one '''Crusader''' or '''Devotee''' for every '''Priest, Deacon''' or '''Zealot''' in your gang, therefore Deacons/Zealots cannot amount to more than half of your gang. If your Priest dies and you have no Deacons to replace him, the gang automatically becomes a mob.

Without a '''Priest''' leading them, they are made up of a '''Mob''' of citizens who make up for being shit with their enthusiasm: gaining additional leadership based on the number of individuals in the gang. Unfortunately they are not permitted to hire any '''Deacons''' ''(who would automatically become Priests in the absence of one anyway, so you are forced to just hire a new priest at full cost)'' The Mob rules represent a spontaneous uprising of the faithful, consisting of a lot of cheap, poorly armed fodder. Like the Crusade, Mobs come with restrictions: you must also have one '''Devotee''' for every '''Crusader''' ''or'' '''Zealot''' in your gang. So if you are using the Mob rules, half of your gang must be made up of Devotees. If they gain enough experience to be promoted, they stay where they are until a space opens up for them. This has deeper ramifications if you were demoted from a Crusade and had lots of Crusaders and Zealots, meaning that you cannot hire any new gangers ''(other than Devotees or a Priest)'' until the balance has been restored.

===RPG===
[[Dark Heresy]] alone introduced three ways for a citizen ''(read: character)'' to become a member of the Redemptionists and the rules for them were not all mutually exclusive either, so some people could go FULL crazy and take them all if they felt their character needed to be more one-dimensional like that,
although no where in rules does it say you cannot play mutant redemptionists, though your [[DM]] might cock-slap [[That Guy|you for doing it]], or [[Rocks Fall, Everyone Dies|force you to commit seppuku]] if you've also taken the elite advance that changes your behaviour, have fun:

*'''Cultist''' - basically what you took as an elite advance if being a member of the cult was done in your spare time. This broadly meant anyone can take up membership unless you were a mutant, psyker, tech-priest, priest of another denomination or disagreed with the cult in general. They are indoctrinated very heavily into the teachings of the cult, and have real difficulty from acting against the ludmillan dictates.

*'''Firebrand''' - Essentially a Cleric of the Redemption, taken as a background package at character creation. These would be the sect leaders of the cult, such as the deacons or pastors, they make it their job to spread the teachings of the redemption, either with a chainsword or a flamer and a whole lot of shouting.

*'''Redeemer''' - more correctly called the "Redemptionist", though is referred to in the text as Redeemer a couple of times which is less confusing for this article. A Redeemer is a professional Redemptionist, the sort of person who lives every day as a Redemptionist and doesn't go home for the evening after the sunday witch-burning. They can either be a Cleric - much like Klovis from the '''"Redeemer"''' comic books or they can be Assassins - like Silas from ''The Da Vinci Code''. Both all-round psychopathic zealots who get to perform [[Adeptus Sororitas|acts of Faith]] and perform practically supernatural feats while murdering heretics, but one focuses on bravado and leadership while the other focuses on killing efficiently and quickly.

===Notable Followers===
*'''House Cawdor''' - An entire Hive House that espouses the Redemptionist interpretation of the [[Imperial Cult#The Imperial Creed|Creed]], possibly an insightful look into what would happen if the Imperium adopted the extreme view of their own religion. They wear elaborate masks when outside of their house though they are not required to wear the colour red all the times. Funnily enough, extreme-extremists sometimes speak out against House Cawdor, since the Imperial Nobility is usually the hotbed of sinners that the cult seeks to purge. Though these particular voices tend to suffer {{BLAM}}, since Cawdor is one of the biggest fundraisers for the cult.
*'''Klovis the Redeemer''' - the most well known Redemptionist (to us at least); called the Arch Maniac by some, he is a notorious rabble rouser who endlessly crusades against sinners. He's pretty much the much noisier, [[grimdark]] version of Batman too, as he is originally a noble of House Cawdor and has a variety of gadgets to help him out; from the [[Awesome|Holy-combi-Eviscerator/Flamer]] called the ''Sword of Persecution'', a flaming mace called ''Mortifier'', and he even has his very own autocannon armed pimp-mobile called the ''Pulpitek.''
**'''Malakev''' - The Robin to Klovis' Batman, though far more useful. Malakev suffers ''Fear'' from everything in a fight if Klovis is outside of 6" and is armed with only a stub pistol and a knife. His job is to chronicle everything that Klovis does and carry around the Big-Giant-Book-of-Torture, said to be imbued with the power of the Emperor which grants him 5++ protection.
*'''The Arch Zealot''' - <s> the Grand Dragon of the K-</s> - the most well known Redemptionist on [[Necromunda]], more so than the Redeemer. Considered to be a prophet, he does not belong to any particular local cult, but travels between them, preaching the creed. He's no-where near as good a fighter as Klovis on the tabletop, but he's far more inspirational and makes his whole gang immune to bricking it and running away.
*'''Archdeacon Ludmilla''' - Leader of the redemptionists in the [[Dark Heresy|Calixis Sector]], which automatically makes her bigger than the Arch Zealot of Necromunda. She is the one who wrote the ''Ludmillan Dictates'' and she has made it her mission to get the Redemption incorporated into the Imperial Creed proper and become part of the [[Ecclesiarchy]]. To this end she sent gifts of burned or flayed sinners to the Cardinal of the sector, much like a pet cat bringing home dead animals.

[[Category:Imperial]]
[[Category:Warhammer 40,000]]

Commissar

2018-01-09T11:03:09Z

2A02:587:3A0A:6B00:E088:4BA2:4059:3AB1:

[[Image:Comissar.png|frame|{{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*'''}}]]
:''But sir -- !
:{{BLAM|''*click* '''*BLAM!*''' If you will not serve in combat, then you will serve on the firing line!}}
:''-- but....your....zipper sir... it's open...
:{{BLAM|''*click* '''*BLAM!*''' Looking at my groin is Slaaneshi worship! <strike>And that's good!</strike> ''*click* '''*BLAM!*''' No! That's HERESY! Who let that damn cultist infiltrate the commissariat?}}

''"I am not afraid of an army of lions led by a sheep; I am afraid of an army of sheep led by a lion."''
-Alexander the Great

''"Kerls, wollt ihr ewig leben?" [Rascals, do you want to live forever?]
-Frederick II of Prussia, to his reluctant-to-attack soldiers, battle of Kolin

''"Last one to die's an Eldar!"
- A Commissar.

''"You're going back to the front lines and you may get shot and killed, but you're going to fight. If you don't, I'll stand you up against a wall and have a firing squad kill you on purpose. In fact, I ought to shoot you myself, you goddamned whimpering coward."
- George S. Patton to a shell-shocked soldier in the hospital

In the times long before these dark hours of the forty-first millennium, commanders of various Terran military entities and their successors in the colonial states of galactic expansionism remained in relative safety throughout the duration of various conflicts instead of charging the lines of their enemies with vitriol and froth issuing from their mouths in equal rabid measure. The instruments of the will of higher officers on the battlefield were men of inflexible will and intolerable zealotry, men greatly respected and feared by their underlings who inspired entire battalions with selfless example and were willing to sacrifice themselves for the success of their company and their empire. These times, while flawed, <s>were much better, more efficient and, perhaps, possessing greater sanity than this current era of strife.</s> {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!* HERESY!'''}} Regardless, these times have long passed.

In this current moment of the history of man, war has become a very different thing. Lasguns firing, explosives detonating, great beasts of unimaginable terror charging the trenches without fear, death of all sorts stalking behind every wisp of smoke... and that's just at the front. Behind every line of trembling conscripts is a man, sanctimonious, who fires not upon the hordes of the enemy, but his own troops.

That man is the '''Commissar'''.

They get a cool [[hats|hat]], a [[Nazi]]-esque longcoat, a sword or power fist they seem all too happy to hit the enemy with and their iconic bolt pistol which they use to boost the morale of their men, although they sometimes trade it for las or plasma pistols (but seeing your buddy's head explode or melt down does indeed motivate you better than just seeing a laser beam go through it). In reality however they're nothing more than a couple of faggots who overcompensate for their lack of fighting skill by executing their men to look tou{{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*'''}}. It's a well known fact that most of their morale enhancement (Unless they're [[Commissar Gaunt]], [[Ciaphas Cain]], or [[Commissar Yarrick]].) consists of being scary merciless bastards to rival the enemy merciless bast- {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*'''}}.

A Commissar that lacks any guardsmen to execute and is in the proximity of any vehicle proceeds to clamber on the said vehicle and threaten the crew into charging the enemy so he can hit the enemy with his close combat weapon. Hilarity ensues depending on the kind of closest vehicle, close combat weapon and closest enemy.

Commissars also have a tendency to get killed suspiciously far from the front lines. Fucking [[Catachan]] heretics... And yet, I cannot help but applaud the Catachans! You've got my support, Jungle Bo{{BLAM|'''*BLAM!* HERESY!'''}}

They also have mad shooting skills, some can even execute '''ENTIRE SQUADS OF COWARDS''' in the time it takes to drop their hats. If only they could shoot the enemies that fast, what with their phenomenal accuracy when shooting their own men and all.

<s>'''THEY'RE SONS OF BITCHES!'''</s> {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!* HERESY!'''}} <s>YOU SEE HE SHOT ME, WHAT AN ASSHOLE!</s> {{BLAM|'''QUIET, HERETIC! *BLAM*'''}} <s>I'm not dead!</s> {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!-BLAM!* DOUBLE HERESY! ONLY CHAOS INFESTED HERETICS REFUSE TO DIE FOR THEIR COMMISSARS'''}} <s>I FEEL FINE!</s>{{BLAM|'''*BLAM!-BLAM!-BLAM!-BLAM!-BLAM!-BLAM!*'''}} <s>I don't want to go on the cart!</s> {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!* SHUT THE FUCK UP!!!'''}} <s>[[Necrons|I'll be back!]]</s> [[Avenger Strike Fighter|BRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRTTTTTT!!!!]]

They are preceded with Discipline Masters in Great Crusade era.

[[Image:Mavel.jpg|2000px|thumb|left|Marvel Heroes of the 3rd Millenium Imperium]]

==On a more serious note==

Beyond their reputation as [[Khârn|team-killing fucktards]], the presence of Commissars make a lot of sense in the Imperial Guard. Copy-pasted straight from the Civil War Soviet real world commissars (save for the uniform) with a dash of Great War era "charge the enemy or i'll execute you" british army officer thrown in, they're political officers with everything that entails.

First of all, they are the warrants of doctrine. They will deal with any disciplinary issue coming up whenever a Guardsman misbehave. The punishment for cowardice and desertion is death and the Commissar will apply the sentence on the spot, but that is only the tip of the iceberg. As a Guard regiment travels around the Imperium, they will come in contact with other cultures and ideas. Ideas that could potentially be dangerous and morale-ruining (looking at you [[Tau]] propaganda, but not only). Just like they real-world counterparts made sure random Ivan remained true to the ideals of communism, the Imperial Commissar will ensure such heretical ideas are suppressed and the regiment remains loyal to the Imperium and fit for duty. Where to the simple Guardsman this translates into being constantly watched by a terrifying enforcer of discipline that does not hesitate to shoot a deserter on the spot, to the higher echelons of the Guard they're a (frankly necessary) constant reminder they're supposed to do their job as defined by [[High Lords of Terra|the old coots back home]] and not go rogue to seize a planet for their own or carve out their own little kingdom. Yeah, it takes a lot to become a Commissar, tactical and strategic training included: after all, they have to judge the competence of everyone, up to and including Lord Solars.

A second part of their job is to ensure cooperation between elements of the Guard. You see, the Imperium is vast. Extremely vast. And only very loosely unified as a whole. Hence what is considered quite normal on one world would have denizens from another throw a massive bitchfit, if not worse. Imagine the result of stuck-up [[Mordian Iron Guard]]s in the same room as rowdy [[Catachan Jungle Fighters]] unsupervised, you'll get the idea. Commissars will to make sure discipline is maintained and rules are adhered to (by force of arms if necessary), no matter the origin of the warriors under their care.

The third part is military counselling. Oficially, a Commissar is outside the chain of command and can only advise on military matters, the ultimate decision remaining in the hands of the commanding officer. But, as mentioned, they also have the authority to execute any soldier if they conclude they're severely derelict in the prosecution of their duties (this includes high ranking officers, as both Ibram Gaunt and Viktor Hark have demonstrated). This means that Commissars will most of the time stay close to the action and lead by example and that people will listen to what they have to say (and almost always agree outright) for fear of {{BLAM}}. One of the core tenets of the Imperial Creed is [[Humanity Fuck Yeah|Mankind's right to be the sole owners of the Galaxy]], and the Commissar is always ready to personally prove it to any [[Harlequin|particular]] [[Exodite|breed]] [[Corsair|of]] [[Eldar|Space]] [[Dark Eldar|Elf]], [[Ork]], [[Necron]], [[Tyranid|space bug]] or whoever was stupid enough to question Mankind's right to rule the stars with their existence that day. (They're helped by often being the most well-equipped and hardest motherfuckers in the squad.)

Should it come to pass that the leader of a squad or regiment has fallen (one way or another, either due to the enemy or {{BLAM}}), the Commissar will assume command himself. Most Guardsmen dreads when this happen for this all too often results in a <strike>pointless last stand for anyone involved</strike> {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!* HERESY! No death in the Emperor's name is pointless!'''}}; anyone attempting to retreat being helped to a bolter shell to the back of the head for cowardice. This is often all too true, but the Commissar has no choice: he simply cannot flee or order a retreat as he's well aware this would be the surest way for morale to collapse immediately, especially if he just executed the commanding officer. And in many cases the situation has already gone so FUBAR when he assumes command that standing his ground and taking as many enemies of the Emperor with him as he can is the only meaningful choice left to him and the men close to him; [[Fist of the North Star|for they are already dead]]. This said, it is not always a bad thing when it happens. [[awesome|The most famous example]], of course, is [[Commissar Yarrick]] assuming command of the defense of [[Armageddon]]; whose undaunted contest of Golgotha hive made [[Ghazghkull Thraka]] lose sight of the larger battle because he couldn't see it as anything but a personal challenge and answered in kind, leaving the flanks of his hordes wide open for the Imperial counter-attack.

Last but not least, the Commissars are also trained to look out for xenos or chaotic taint. Not all enemies of the Imperium [[Ork|conveniently charge at the Guard straight on]] but use much more insidious methods. So the Commissars are taught a little bit (just what is needed) about Chaos, Genestealers, Enslavers and all those kind of joyful things that could fuck over their regiment and how to look out for it, with the strict instruction to {{Blam}} anything they find out on sight. Any [[psyker]] in their regiment will be under their constant scrutiny because where Average Joe just has a vague knowledge he should 'abhor the witch', the Commissar know what would happen if he would get [[Daemonhost|possessed]]. Better safe than sorry.

With the above in mind, you easily understand why Commissars are at best tolerated and often hated with a passion by the men under their care. They are hard and pitiless men, but that is a sad necessity in the [[grimdark|just as hard and pitiless 40k universe where the alternative is even worse]]. It should also be noted, that not all Commissars are trigger-happy fucknuts. The intelligent ones that live long lives learn that the right words can often inspire men just as well, if not better, than a bolt to the head. These Commissars learn to tell the difference in situations. After all, the Commissars first job is to inspire the troops, through whichever means are most appropriate. Off course, the trigger-happy fucknuts do tend to spoil the bunch for the good ones.

==Choices of equipment==
*Badass longcoat, badass sash and even more badass hat straight out of Hugo Boss during the Nazi era.
*Mars-Pattern ceramite balls
*Flak armour- Standard guardsman issue Commissar armoured underwear.
*Carapace armor & Refractor field- A better armour and a force field for genre-savvy Lord Commissar.
*Camo-cloak. Serves to hide said badass garments and get less fire from the enemy and guardsmen.
*Special Mask for a Lord that weeps tears of blood near traitors! Oh and scares people. Also gives a force field.

*Saber- Often carried to swing towards enemies while riding a Leman Russ tank so that he could drive closer and hit enemies with his sword.
**[[Chainsword]]- For a sword that's actually useful more often than not.
**[[Power weapon|Power sword]]- For slaying armored enemies and hassle-free decapitations.
**Power fist- For punching through enemy [[METAL_BOXES|Metal Bawkses]].

*[[Laspistol]]- Clean, precise, and efficient working tool of the Commissar that doesn't waste ammunition. Less satisfying to execute people with though.
*Bolt pistol- Produces very satisfying {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*'''}}ming sound that raises self-esteem of the worthless ponce hold-{{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*'''}}, can also get through standard issue imperial flak armor if you need to blam someone in the chest on the battle field.
*[[Bolter]]- Good for shooting underarmoured enemies and your entire squad if you suspect them all of {{BLAM|HERESY}}.
*[[Plasma|Plasma pistol]]- Good for shooting armoured enemies dead. Bad for summary executions since it's poor form for it to over heat when trying to "inspire" your squad.
*Baleful Eye- [[Commissar Yarrick|Lasgun built in the eye socket to kill Orks with a glare]].
*Grenades & bombs.
*Titanium balls.
*Two pairs of balls, (see above)

==Reasonable Commissars==
Reasonable Commissars do not execute those who flee. However, they do carry a potent stun-gun to bring down those who break ranks and save the bolter shells for those who have willingly became servants of Chaos or Xenos. Afterwards, the accused is brought before a military tribunal to judge what the appropriate punishment will be. Reasonably Hard Labor is a common punishment. If an not-so-reasonable commissar is present the punishment is invariably a {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*'''}}-ing. The bas- {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*'''}}

Reasonable Commissars can often be found in units operating alongside [[Reasonable Marines]].

Reasonable Commissars understand their duty is to instill courage within the Imperial Guard, not to instill discord and discontent. Thus they lead by example and be the first to die and last to retreat.

Reasonable Commissars only exist because there are Commissars who are *ahem* ''dicks''...such as Commissar Jericho of the 8th Cadian Whiteshield division:

:''Lil' Timmy: "Commissar? My helmet won't fit. Can you please help me fasten it?"''

:''Jericho: "IF YOU CANNOT FASTEN YOUR OWN HELMET, YOU'RE AN INEFFECTIVE SOLDIER! AN INEFFECTIVE SOLDIER IS THE SAME AS A HERETIC IN MY BOOK! SUMMARY EXECUTION FOR YOU!" {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*'''}}''

:''Jericho: "SO. ANY OF YOU OTHER CHILDREN WANT HELP WITH SOMETHING? WHAT ABOUT YOU, OLIVER? DO YOU STILL WANT MORE PORRIDGE? OH WAIT, YOU'RE DEAD! HAH! GET BACK TO FIGHTING YOU LITTLE PIECES OF SLIME!"''

::''- from the records of Inquisitor Murtho''

To some extent, they do actually exist in Warhammer canon, with [[Ciaphas Cain]] ('''HERO OF THE IMPERIUM!!!''') and [[Colonel-Commissar Ibram Gaunt|Ibram Gaunt]] being the most iconic examples, the fact that they became tremendously famous (OK, Gaunt - not so much) and idolized is implied to have led to many newer Commissars using their less trigger happy and more reasonable methods. Proof that sometimes, you can make a positive difference in Warhammer.

It could be argued that all Commissars are reasonable as most don't hold malicious intent when killing their own, or don't kill their own unless in extreme (Read: Chaos) circumstances, since most of the time shooting your own men can be counterproductive when they're light infantry fleeing from a Super heavy tank. Or if they, you know, have orders to pull back. Obviously they are evil fucks for killing their own men but usually it is done because it has to be done. Rules are rules, heresy is heresy, and Commissars have to show some authority. Not saying that they are necessarily nice guys but no Commissar ever sleeps well at night, except Gaunt, he was pretty fucking cool!

==Female Commissars==
A female Commissar is a rare sight, except by the Vostroyans, otherwise, there is little to no representation in the fluff.

Females of the [[Schola Progenium]] are far more likely to end up in the [[Adepta Sororitas]] and when they are becoming guardswomen, they are far more likely to be put in auxiliary and support roles than front lines combat, thus reducing their chances to be sent to a Schola and becoming either a Storm Trooper or an Inquisitor, when they don't get transferred to the Sisters. Nevertheless they do exist and perform the same functions on the battlefield as their male counterparts, and have been known to be even more nasty than your regular commissar if the regiment is mostly made up of men for obvious reasons.

However, there have been all female regiments of guardswomen, and they only had female Commissars.

In the recent [[Lemartes]] novel, there was a Female Commissar Stromberg attached to the [[Mordian Iron Guard]]--she died like she lived, making and infantry charge against motherfucking [[Skarbrand]] of all things before being ripped into 3 bits with one axe swing. Buying enough time for the Blood angels to regroup and therefore get all the glory of banishing the Daemon. Typical.

[[Commissar Raege]] is one of the rare cases of a female that became a Commissar.

==Commissar in Squat Regiments==
It was considered a common occurrence for a Commissar to be grouped with a [[Squat]] regiment when they were still relevant in 40k lore. However unlike in the Guard, the Commissars being stationed with the stunties act as advisers rather than a force of morale. That is mainly because to keep an eye on the Squats. Of course a Commissar is forbidden in {{BLAM|Blamming}} a Squat since while he has a Bolt/Laspistol, you basic [[Squat Trooper]] has Plasma Guns, Conversion Beamers and captured [[Eldar]] D-Cannons as their flashlight equivalent. So if the Commissar is a idiotic prick and thinks he/she has near impunity with the Squats he is stationed with, he will soon find his face kissing the barrel of a Squat Melta Gun.

Wish we still have some of our Dorfs back, then we can teach these red-capped bastards on what it is like on the firing li-{{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*''' insulting a Commissariat is ''HERESY''! BLAM! BLAM! BLA-}} '''*FFSSSHHHHHOOOOOOOOOMMMMMM!* Oi! Ye Boltshell hit Grimmly in the eye! Your payment for harming us is swift ye Red-Capping Boggort!'''

Yeah, the Space Dorfs did not fuck around back in the day. Commissars act not only as advisers but also supporting leaders. But their leadership is often ineffectual when compared to that of [[Squat Warlord]], [[Guildmaster]] or heck, even a [[Living Ancestor]].

==What not to do around a commissar==

[[Image:Commissar_NO.jpg|thumb|200px|right|If you have to ask...]]
Unless you have a death wish (since you're drafted into the Guard, we already KNOW you have a death wish) these are the things you should avoid doing around your Commissar unless you want to be shot for a number of reasons:

*Do not retreat until he says so.
*Do not look like you will retreat before he says so.
*Do not think about retreating before he says so.
*Do not think about thinking of retreating before he says so.
*Do not retreat even WHEN he says so.
*Do not refuse to retreat when he says so because you will later be shot for insubordination.
*Do not be incompetent in battle, he'll execute you for being useless.
*Do not move too far away from a Commissar attached to your squad, he might think you are retreating without his command.
*Do not fap to the women that are [[Shlicktau|xenos]], [[Cultist-chan|heretics]], or [[Furry|mutants]] while in the field of battle... or outside.
*Do not fap to [[-4_Str|human women]] either, he'll execute you for dereliction of duty. Also, Slaanesh worship.
*Do not fap '''AT ALL''' Because it is heresy. No! Fap to the Corpse-Empero- wait, I kinda gave that away, didn't- {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*''' HERESY!!}}
*Do not mock anyone in the upper command structure, social status and organizations. It's the same as treason and treason, kids, is [[HERESY]].
*Do not look at your commissar with a [[grimdark]] look, he'll assume you want to kill him. Unless you're a Catachan. He doesn't need to see the look to know you want to kill him.
*Do not pretend to listen to your commissar.
*Do not pretend to pretend to listen to your commissar.
*GODAMMIT LISTEN TO YOUR COMMIS- {{BLAM|'''*CRACK*'''}} Oops my lasgun misfired. Sorry Commissar... (not really)
*Do not interrupt him while speaking, he'll execute you for the insubordination.
*Do not change your underwear. Tzeentch worship.
*Do not neglect to change your underwear. Nurgle worship.
*Do not bring up the paradox of changing underwear. Malal worship. (There is no paradox as long as you follow the correct procedure. First remove and burn the tainted garment while reciting the litany of blessed hygiene. Instead of "Changing" your underwear, proceed to replace the purged garments with identical standard pattern guard issued underwater.)
*Do not worship the [[Chaos|ruinous powers]], even if your commissar is-{{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*''' Commissars are loyal servants of the Emperor!}}
*Do not look like you are worshipping the ruinous powers.
*Do not think about worshipping the ruinous powers.
*Do not think about thinking about worshipping the ruinous powers.
*Do not think '''AT ALL''' or he'll think you are thinking about worshiping the ruinous powers.
*Do not find out about the Ruinous Powers. Best you can hope for is being sterilised and mind-wiped.
*Do not fall ill. Nurgle worship.
*Do not fall seriously ill. Serious Nurgle worship.
*Do not think about getting ill. More Nurgle worship.
*Do not think abou- To Hell with this, you are already thinking about getting ill! {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*'''}}
*Do not watch "My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic", that is both Tzeentch and Slaanesh worship. (and if the excessive cuteness makes you sick than it's also Nurgle Worship.)
*Do not openly question his orders.
*Do not question his orders behind his back either.
*Do not suggest your orders are suicidal.
*Do not suggest that said "''suicidal''" Commissar should join the enemy, if he is able to kill his squad so quickly.
*Do not suggest anything, lest he take it for Heresy.
*Do not mention that the Ministorum Priests are better motivators. {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*''' Insubordination!}}
*Do not mention that the sanctioned Psykers scare you more than him. <s>{{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*''' Insubordination again!}}</s> {{BLAM|Actually that's acceptable, the mutant witch must be thoroughly abhorred and constantly monitored for [[heresy]].}} '''UNBLAM!''' Commissar did I just see you execute a guardsmen and than bring him back to life? Could that perhaps be a bit of chaos sorcery? *Flashes Inquisitorial Seal* I think we need to have a little chat back aboard my ship. Seize this Commissar on suspicion of [[Heresy]]!
*Do not mention that he is the most useless unit to have in a command squad. {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*''' Insubordination again! Why won't you die!?}} Oh Holy Terra your Unblamming made him a [[perpetual]]. Take this guardsman back to the ship as well and tell the captain to prepare for [[Exterminatus]] this whole page is corrupted.
*Do NOT interrupt him while attempting to execute someone <s>unless you have a pretty good reason</s> as he'll execute you along with the one about to be executed.
*DO NOT UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES challenge him or her in a western shootout. Why? Because they'll {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*'''}} kill you all in LESS than a splitsecond, now get back to the front, or you'll join him.
*DO NOT UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES give your commissar a new bolt pistol for his birthday. Just think of how fast he can {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*'''}} your squad if he goes Akimbo...
*Do not ask a Commissar for a bullet in the head. He ''will'' have you flogged for cowardice.
*Do not ask a Commissar for a flogging. He '''''WILL''''' have you shot in the spine for being a Slaaneshi Cultist. Not that that's a bad thing, being a Sla-{{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*''' HERESY!}}
*Do not, in any way, shape, or form, give a zealous Commissar an Assault Cannon. You will have no unit.
*Do not, under any circumstances, give a zealous Commissar a Deathstrike Missile Launcher. You ''will'' have no army.
*Do not give a Commissar a cookie, or he'll think you are trying to poison him. You chaos worshipping freak.
*Do not be bald, then you are a Genestealer.
*Do not be balding, then you are becoming a Genestealer.
*Do not think about balding, then you are thinking about becoming a Genestealer.
*Do not think about thinking about balding, you don't wanna become a Genestealer.
*Do not add to this list, or else he will have you shot for insubordination. He- Yes, Sir!... No, sir... Sir? {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*''' HERESY!}}
*<strike>THIS LIST NEEDS MORE CHAOS!</strike>{{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*''' HERESY!}}!!
*Do not use an axe as a last-ditch weapon. Khornate behaviour. Only acceptable if having said "For the Emperor!" and dying soon afterwards for the Imperium.
*Do not eat your rations in a particularly vigorous manner. Khorne worship.
*Any alteration of the standard uniform shall not be tolerated. Tzeentch worship.
*Growing facial hair in the pres- {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*'''}}. More Tzeentch worship.
*Do not cut yourself while shaving your facial hair. More Khorne worship.
*Surviving a life threatening injury at the hands of the enemy. Serious Tzeentch worship.
*Do not bring prostitutes to the base while your unit is on leave. Slaanesh worship (and just plain improper behavior).
*Waking up lat- {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*'''}}. Cowardice.
*Do not give a zealous Commissar a spacecraft. You will have [[Exterminatus|lost a planet]].
*Do not deface or lose your Imperial Infantrymen's Uplifting Primer. (even though any veteran guardsman will tell you most of pages are complete bullsh- {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*''' HERESY!}} )
*Calling your self a member of the "Astra Militarum" {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*''' HERESY!}} we are and always have been the Imperial Guard: Hammer of the Emperor!
*Do not lose your issued Lasgun. Unless it's loss is unavoidable in{{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*'''}} A proper Guardsman would never lose his Lasgun.
*Do not remind him that technically Commissars are outside the chain of command and cannot order you. So next time a fraking com- {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*'''. Cursing Commissars is HERESY!!!}}
*Do not try to take the easy way out with suicide. Malal worship. {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*''' HERESY! MALAL DOES NOT EXIST!}}
*Do not kill heretics. Malal worship

==What to do around a Commissar==
[[File:Oh Lawd.png|150px|right|thumb|Nothing escapes the vigilant eye of a commissar (except everything)]]
*Worship the Emperor
*Talk fairly loudly about how the chaos gods suck. (Except for slaanesh who is just bad damn thing dosen't need to suck any more. Besides, saying Slaanesh sucks could be considered worship, resulting in a {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*'''}}ing.)
*Make sure all your gear is organized, cleaned, maintained, and free of non-standard issue modifications.
*Do go into [[rage]] mo-{{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*''' Getting angry is Khorne worship! (Raging over the filthy xenos is acceptable though.)}}
*Praise him on a job well done when circumstances are right- {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*''' Kissing ass is borderline Slaneesh worship!}}
*Shine his laspistol when he isn't using it.{{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*''' Handling your superior officer's weapons is grand treason!}}
*Give him a blowjo-{{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*''' SLAANESHI HERETIC!}}
*Charge towards Khorne Berserkers even if you don't want to.{{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*''' Suicidal charges are borderline Khorne worship. Neglecting to charge however is disobeying orders. So either way you get '''*BLAM!*'''ed.}}
*Go to battle even if you're feeling sic-{{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*''' Spreading sickness to your comrades is serious Nurgle worship!}}
*Compliment his marksmanship skills.{{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*''' WHAT DID I SAY ABOUT KISSING ASS!!?}} Pff, missed m- {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*''' Easily enough to fix.}}
*Let him know in advance when you're having a sick day so he won't execute you for dereliction of du- {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*''' NURGLE WORSHIPER!}}
*Have your uplifting primer on your person. Failure to present it on request will result in {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*'''}}.
*Bring him [[An Eldar's Ears|a captive Eldar]] {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*''' XENOS LOVING FILTH!!}} ([[Love Can Bloom|"I'll be happy to take that captive off your hands commissar."]])
*When the rest of your squad looks like they are gonna fall back, step away from the Commissar's general direction as he might choose to execute you to make an example for the rest of the men.
*When the rest of your squad looks like they are gonna fall back, step towards the Commissar's general direction as he might choose to execute you to make an example for the rest of the men.
*When you are about to do something that can only be described as batshit insane and a Commissar's around suggest it to him, if you survive said suicide mission he'll probably favor you a bit, which probably means that he MIGHT actually think about who's he shooting at.
*If you're the guy at the wheel of a transport, DRIVE HIM CLOSER! HE WANTS TO HIT THE ENEMIES OF THE EMPRAH WITH HIS SWORD!
*Prior to giving him wargear, make sure that you ''haven't'' cleaned it, most Commissars prefer the bloodstained wargear look. {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*''' failure to clean blood off of your weapons or uniform is an offence against the Departmento Munitorum policies!}}
*Make sure you're the only man left in the squad other than the Commissar when retreating, the Commissar rulebook says that if the squad he is attached to only has one man left, he isn't allowed to make his face blow up because he'd end up looking stupid and it's a waste of ammo since there is nobody to inspi {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*''' The Commissar does what he wants!}}
*If the Commissar looks pissed read (or at least pretend to read) an Imperial Creed book or something, he can't shoot you because you're reading Imperial Creed stu-- {{BLAM|'''*BLAM*''' Now you are no longer reading it. Situation resolved.}}
*Bring an RPG or other Big Fucking Gun in case he tries to blam you. Make sure you say "you've been bla- {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*''' HERESY!}} (pssst! Make sure you say "You've been BLAMMED!" ''after'' you kill the Commissar and know there aren't more on the battlefield. [[Just As Planned|WHO'S LAUGHING NOW COMMISSARS!?]]){{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*''' HERESY!}}
*If your Commissar has a bolt pistol make sure there that when he starts {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*'''}}ing that there are 10 people closer to the Commissar then you. That way after he's done blaming the rest of your platoon he might think you 'suitably inspired' so as to not blam you. {{BLAM|'''*CLICK*'''}} See it works! {{BLAM|'''*BLAM*''' RELOADING IS ONLY A TEMPORARY INCONVENIENCE TO THE AGENTS OF THE IMPERIUM!}}
*Be born on [https://1d4chan.org/wiki/Catachan_Jungle_Fighters Catachan] those over dressed foreigners don't have the balls to shoot you. {{BLAM|HERESY!! '''*KABOOM*'''}} "Why no sarge, I have no idea why the Commissar decided to do a patrol, through a mine field, in the dead of night.
*Be a member of the Karauvan Conservators. Vance Motherfucking Stubbs loves his motherfucking men. Also because no Commissar wants to {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*'''}} people who can {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*'''}} a Living Saint to death with flashlights.
*Instead of ''DYING'', try to acquire the Enemy's head. Minor kudos for a Grunt, some kudos for an NCO Equivalent, and perhaps at least a bit of respect from the Commissar him/herself for an enemy Commander, or said Commander's Lieutenants. Possible points if you shout out: ''"DEATH UNTO THE ENEMIES OF MA-..."'' <strike>{{BLAM|'''*BLAM*''' Borderline Khorne-Worship!}}</strike> ('''ALL''' foes of mankind must be cleansed. Punishing such actions is heretical in of itself Commissar.) '''Unblam''' {{BLAM|Re-'''*BLAM*''' RESURRECTING THE DEAD IS SERIOUS HERESY!!}}
'''Inquisitorial Decree:''' Commissars are henceforth forbidden from '''Unblamming'''. The practice of resurrecting the dead is chaos sorcery. Loyal imperial citizens who have been accidentally {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*'''ed}} can take solace in the fact that their souls will spend eternity basking in the Emperor's divine light.

==Notable Commissars==
*[[Colonel-Commissar Ibram Gaunt]] (<s>Who?</s>) {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*''' HERESY!}}
*[[Commissar Yarrick]] Da orkiest humie eva!!
*Commissar [[Ciaphas Cain]] HERO OF THE IMPERIUM!!!!! Secretly believes himself to be a coward. The truth of that is up for debate.
*Commissar-General Delane Oktar: Ibram Gaunt's mentor and substitute father-figure. He should have died better.
*[[Commissar Fuklaw]] is tired of putting up with your heretical bullshit.
*[[Commissar Dan]]
*[[Commissar Koulick Krieg]] attached to the famed storm trooper regiment known as the Redemption Corps and an agent for the Adeptus Ministorum. Never officially trained as a commissar, but field promoted from storm trooper on behalf of the Eclesiarcy to infiltrate the "heretical" regiment that was the free thinking Redemption Corps, eventually turning on his masters and becoming a full part of the Corps instead.
*[[Heretical Love|Commissar Max]] the Lovemachine of Yagis V. (It should be noted that he was actually a guardsman who picked up Commissar regalia and weapons.)
*[[K59|Commissar K59]]
*[[Holt]] {{BLAM|'''*SLAP*''' Commissar Holt!!!}}
*[[Commissar Raege]]
*<strike>[[Kharn|Kharn]] [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LRVcdLPqoHg| The Commissar]</strike> {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*''' Major Khorne worship!}}
*[[Colonel Greiss]] Formerly a Commissar; became a conventional officer through necessity.
* [[Commissar Lord Bernn|Commissar LORD Bernn]] (always put LORD in ALL CAPS -bold is optional-, not doing so is Heresy.) Known for making entire armies completely invincible as long as he has people to execute and beating Mega-Daemon Princes, Hive Tyrants, Land Raider Redeemers, Battlewagons, Deranged Khornate Chaos Champions (if you're so far off your rocker that other Khornates think you're crazy, you may be a wee bit nutters), and Eldar wraithlords to death with a power fist. Also notable for being able to one-shot any infantry, from lowly Ork boyz to TERMINATORS with his laspistol. He needs no words to show he's a badass.
*'''Commissar "Colonel" Schaeffer''' He had his arm shot off by a plasma gun '''AND GREW IT BACK''', had his spine rebuilt after being crushed by a tank and made a full recovery, had his eyes replaced after his other ones were destroyed and has survived being thrown into suicide mission after suicide mission for over 300 years '''LIKE A BOSS''', he gets down and dirty and is usually seen in front of his men in the battle rather than behind them. He's still brutal as fuck to deserters though. *why doesn't he have his own pag- {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*'''}}
* '''Commissar Jaes "Jellyfish" Quallen'''. Fragile, stuttering, clumsy, prone to disease, about as intimidating as a wet kitten. His enlistment was a cruel wager between two of his rich aunts to see if he would survive. He barely made his commission as commissar, and he was discarded to the Catachan 217th infantry to get rid of him. And yet he's still alive today. What's more, he leads his men from the very front, utterly fearless when the jagged teeth of Chaos spawn ('''OH GOD NOOOOOOAAAAAUUUUUUUGHHHHHHH!!! GRRAAAAAAAAAGH!!!!''' {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*''' Mercy killing; continue.}}) are inches from his face, humming to himself in the middle of the shitstorm that is every battlefield. Atypical for a Catachan company, his men are quite loyal to him, well-liked for leading by example instead of inspiring fear behind the lines ... although they do tease him off-duty by playing keepaway with his hat.
*'''Commissar Viktor Hark''' - The Commissar for the Tanith First (and Only). Pretty bad ass dude with a cybernetic arm to beat heretics and a plasma pistol to melt faces with. Pretty reasonable for a Commissar, preferring {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*'''}} only when it can have the most effect on a units morale, which in some cases means {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*'''}}ming the guy in charge.
*'''Commissar Flint''' was abruptly reassigned to the reconstituted 77th Vostroyan Firstborn Dragoons, whose first mission was to quell a bloody rebel uprising at a penal facility on Furia Penitens. Leading a picked team of escaped convicts and Firstborn, Flint infiltrated the vast creepy facility, wrecking Stalkers, slaying giant mutants with his power sword and slaughtering literal rebel scum by the dozens, all while keeping his execution-count impressively low and displaying many feats of epic badassery. Not bad for a commissar who gets his own book who isn't Gaunt or Cain.
*'''Commissar Fenstrum Holt''': A supporting character in the ongoing '''Eagle Ordinary''' [http://www.eagleordinary.com/chapters/77723/planetfall/]webcomic. NOT to be confused with (though he constantly is, even by his own junior, Commissar Talon Gunner) that ''other'' Holt *SLAP* [[Commissar Holt]]. '''This''' Holt is an elderly badass with a creepy bionic eye who manages to beat up trigger-happy aristocratic officers despite being only 5'6. Although introduced in the comic's first page engaging in the Commissariat's trademark pastime {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*-ming'''}} Guardsmen, his character is so well-written and drawn he might just be the fan favorite. Might just be the only adult in the whole comic as well.

==Commissar Mortality==
Commissars, at least those attached to an imperial guard regiment, do not exactly have a high life expectancy (well, not that anyone in Imperial Guard have). Next to the many horrible fates that await your average "balls of steel" Guardsman in the [[grimdark]] WH40K universe, the Commissars have some additional aggravating factors leading to a quick demise.

Some reasons:
* A commissar's uniform is very different from those he is working with, add to that he is shouting things at people and possibly {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*'''}}-ming them, probably without fire being returned at him, and is probably carrying different weapons than those around him. It doesn't take a genius to figure out he is an obvious High-Value Target which any sniper worth the name would take note of.
* Aforementioned uniform offers little to no head protection, head protection is for cowards and cowards get {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*'''}}-med. (However, a Commissar's lack of headgear can get him {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*'''}}-med by the enemy).(subverted for death korps as they have helmets under their hats)
* {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*'''}}-ming cowards, and especially {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*'''}}-ming non-cowards, often has a side effect of *accidentally* getting shot, repeatedly, sometimes even far from the front lines. This fate is particularly common for those attached to Catachan units.
* Even when not getting *accidentally* shot/dropped in a pit/run over/... by his own troops, few Guardsmen will risk their lives to save a Commissar should he get into trouble with the enemy.
* Some Commissars both lead by example and expect their men to perform acts of suicidal courage, resulting in performing collective suicide in the name of the Emprah.
* Lots of Commissars like big flashy bolt pistols. Bolt pistols, [[Dakka|being roight flash bitz of dakka]], naturally attract orks like sugar water attracts flies, and unlike laspistols eventually run out of bolts.
* According to their most recent models some unusually ballsy Commissars carry plasma pistols, and as such possess a statistical lifespan of six shots at maximum.

==Quotes==

* "Fear me...'''''but follow!'''''"
* "You can give the Emperor your loyalty, or I can take it from your corpse."
* "You DARE shoot at me?...{{BLAM|'''AT ME?!'''}}
* "What I cannot crush with words, I shall crush with the tanks of the Imperial Guard."
* "Fear ensures loyalty! Where do you need me?"
* "Trooper, the enemy ''may'' kill you, but if you try to run I '''will''' kill you!"
* {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*'''}}
*"It is our duty to muster the Guardsmen's courage and loyalty under fire and it is our duty to - '''GET THE FUCK BACK HERE!'''"{{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*'''}}{{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*'''}}
*"WHO GAVE YOU PERMISSION TO DIE?! 'CAUSE I SURE AS HELL DIDN'T!"
*[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xrrCY7dgaqs Drive me closer, I want to hit them with my sword!]
* "Follow my example or I will MAKE YOU ONE!"
* A compilation of some -if not all- of DowII Commissar quotes can be found: [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=isLz_8ppLig here].
* <s>Heil Hitler!</s> {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!* HERESY!!!'''}} Heil Emperor!
** Wouldn't it be "Heil der Gott-Kaiser"? {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!* HERESY!!!''' It is "Heil dem Gott-Imperator!" Good job on the hyphen, though.}}
*** Also wasn't the Emperor Hitler back in the 1930s? {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*'''}}
* "If you will not serve in combat, ''then you will serve '''on the firing line!'''''" {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*'''}}
* "SHUT UP ZATHRAS"
*"GLORY TO THE FIRST MAN TO DIE!"
*"DO NOT FAIL UPON MY RETURN!"

==Gallery==
<center><gallery>
Image:Commisarmoti.jpg|The real reason why Guardsmen do not revolt en masse.
Image:Closer.jpg|Commissars never let practicality get in the way of their awesomeness.
Image:Commissar Surfing.jpg|Again, practicality is never a hindrance.
Image:Comissar_Promotions.jpg|Imperial Guard Promotion policy, you either get promoted or {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*'''}}-med, no exceptions.
Image:1230024061774.png|Reasonable Commissars know that summary execution is not always needed to motivate anyone.
Image:Thenewcommissar.jpg|[[Kharn]] during his traitor commissar days with the Red Rivers traitor guardsmen.
Image:Romantic_Commissar.jpg|Commissars can be romantic. It's just that they are too busy {{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*'''}}-ming Guardsmen.
Image:Penguin_Commisar.jpg|Do not approach the Commissar under any circumstances, no matter how cute he may be.
Image:Komissar_by_kriegsmachine14.jpg|Why so serious? Let's put a smile on that face...
Image:Commissarpoke.jpg|Don't let this one's slow demeanor make you too confident.
Image:1207335821953.jpg|[[Commissar Dan]] on the blaze of glory run
Image:Commissar-Fuck_Yeah.jpg|Imperial Guard, FUCK YEAH!
Image:Commissar_Badass.jpg|[[Ciaphas Cain|HERO OF THE IMPERIUM!]]
Image:Fixedhat2.jpg|The Commissar is here to ensure your loyalty.
Image:CommissarCos.jpg|{{BLAM|'''*BLAM!*'''}}
Image:Commissar Hansen.jpg|Guardian of all imperial [[loli|lolis]].
Image:Emote-commissar.gif
</gallery></center>
{{Promotions}}
<center><gallery>
Image:Comissar-by-Chink-1.jpg|Chink loev commissar
Image:Comissar-by-Chink-2.jpg|[[Rule 63]] spares no one.
Image:Yarrick_by_Chink_1.jpg|[[Commissar Yarrick]] by Chink
Image:Yarrick_by_Chink_2.jpg
Image:Feb.jpg|Commissar from the ill-fated /tg/ calendar project
Image:Atra concept.jpg|Much Sexier Version
Image:Daemonette commisssar.JPG|One of these is not like the others.
Image:1226746378911.jpg|Squad morale restored.
Image:powerfists_commissar.jpg|If you're wondering how she's "coping" with those things, don't ask us, for we have as good an idea as you do.
</gallery></center>
{{Template:Imperial-Guard}}
{{Militarum-Tempestus}}
{{Template:Squats}}

[[Category:Commissars]]

Ciaphas Cain

2018-01-09T01:30:28Z

2A02:587:3A0A:6B00:E088:4BA2:4059:3AB1:

[[Image:cain.jpg|300px|thumb|right|Hero of the Imperium, fighting the grim-derp since 2002]]
{{Topquote|I learned that courage was not the absence of fear, but the triumph over it. The brave man is not he who does not feel afraid, but he who conquers that fear.|Nelson Mandela}}

'''Ciaphas Cain, (Accidental) [[Hero of the Imperium|HERO OF THE IMPERIUM]]!!!''' was a famous [[Commissar]] of the [[Imperium of Man|Imperium]] and is the protagonist of the eponymous series of novels by [[Sandy Mitchell]]. The GRIMDARK Flashman to [[Colonel-Commissar Ibram Gaunt|Gaunt's]] Sharpe. He spent most of his career in active service attached to [[Imperial Guard]] regiments from the ice world of [[Valhalla]]—most notably the 597th, and accompanied by his aide [[Jurgen]]. He retired to become a professor at a [[Schola Progenium]] later in life, but this did not mark the end of his exploits, being recalled into active service during the [[Black Crusade#13th Black Crusade|13th Black Crusade]]. He was also called upon at many points throughout his life to assist the [[Alienhunters|Ordos Xenos]] [[Inquisitor]] [[Amberley Vail]], who is almost certainly his lover.

The novels are presented as extracts from Cain's personal, unofficial memoirs, edited by Amberley—published only to and kept under lock and key by the [[Inquisition]] as they present a vastly different story to all the official Imperial propaganda about his adventures. Contrary to the heroic image he cultivated to the Imperium at large, Cain described himself as a self-serving coward in his memoirs, spending most of his time trying to ensure his own comfort and survival, only becoming a hero by accident. However, despite his self-deprecation, he routinely demonstrates great bravery and compassion in the stories, leading many to believe he is a much better person than he would admit to himself. In any event, he always subscribed to the long-term version of cowardice, often taking courses of action that appeared extremely dangerous on the basis that they gave him a better chance of survival in the long term, if not the short one.

He is also well known for being one of the few commissars to earn the trust and respect of the Guardsmen he served with—aided by his heroic reputation, but mainly because he persistently demonstrated care and concern for the soldiers of his regiment. Despite repeated insistence in his memoirs he merely did this to get on their good sides, there's a great deal of evidence that his feelings were genuine.

Cain himself was an extremely skilled combatant, being an excellent shot with his trusty [[laspistol]] and highly proficient in the use of his [[chainsword]] in melee. Amongst other things, he defeated an [[Ork]] [[warboss]] and stood up to two [[Chaos Space Marines]] in single combat, both incredible feats for an ordinary man, especially as the only bionics he possessed were a few replacement fingers. Not to mention going toe to toe with ''two'' [[Tyranid]] [[Hive Tyrant]]s, and wounding them both before his men can help him. Mind you, even ranged Hive Tyrants can rip up an [[Assault Squad|Assault Marine]] and eat him without too much effort. Further exploits include holding his own against a fucking [[Daemon]] Princess pretty well (with Jurgen's help, but still he did better than most would have), defeating [[Genestealer]]s in close combat (one of which could kill two [[Word Bearers]] and severely injure a third in a matter of seconds), and standing his ground against a fucking Genestealer Patriarch/[[Broodlord]]. He also has the honour of being forever listed on "Active Battle Duty", according to official records, despite being buried with full battle honours in the early M42's; this is because, in the course of his exploits, he had been assumed to have died only to reappear later so many times that the [[Administratum]] couldn't keep up with the paperwork and simply issued a general order that his recorded status not be changed despite any evidence apparently to the contrary. Of course, his legacy is such that saying he's still in service to the Imperium wouldn't be far wrong...

[[Image:Mavel.jpg|2000px|thumb|left|Marvel Heroes of the 3rd Millenium Imperium]]

==The Novels==
Essentially, George MacDonald Fraser's [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Harry_Paget_Flashman The Flashman Papers] and McAuslan stories transplanted into the 41st Millennium, though, while Cain is more of a Coward with a Heart of Gold, Flashman can best be described as a Jerk with a Heart of Jerk, Braised in a Jamaican Jerk Sauce, then Dried out into Jerked Jerk Jerky.

Whilst the books are quite well-written, [[Sandy Mitchell]] is a big fan of recycling - even down to specific sentences. Hence each book ''is guaranteed'' to feature exactly the same descriptions of his aide [[Jurgen]] as all the others, someone doing something with "almost indecent haste", and about half a dozen variations on the theme, "Of course, if I knew what I was getting myself into by doing [x], I'd have rather charged into the [[Eye of Terror]] with nothing but a rusty fork."

They are also notable for the Jurgen Ex Machina, where most of the dramatic fights are ended by the intervention of Cain's aide Jurgen armed with a [[melta]]gun and his powers as a [[psyker]]-disrupting "[[blank]]". Over the course of the series, Jurgen has racked up more kills than the rest of the Valhallan 597th put together, and has yet to have any character development whatsoever. But that's fine, because Jurgen is 125% distilled [[awesome]].

While it's unclear if this is an issue with Cain or Mitchell, the books also can't seem to tell the difference between a heavy bolter and a storm bolter, using the terms interchangeablly to the point where it can sometimes be difficult to figure out which particular weapon is actually being described.

Also features psychotic lesbian Valhallans, Orky Gargants crumpin' dose [[Necron]] gits, a grinning, friendly neighborhood Inquisitor (who you should flee from at all costs), psychotic psykers who wear dresses too small, savants that are barred from entering casinos, [[World Eaters]] getting killed by "mere" humans, surviving a starship crash, playing ''[[Space Hulk]]'' for real, blue facepainted [[Tau]] supporters yelling that you can take their lives, but not their freedom, and the Harriers getting the goddamn cup, didn't get it though. [[Awesome|And Space Daemon Werewolf Psyker Hitler being kicked over a dam by a solid boot to the arse]].

==Cain Books and Collected Short Stories==
[[File:CAIN-TRUEHERO.jpg|300px|thumb|right|Cain, summed up in all his glory. (The actual SCENE is from ''The Traitor's Hand''.)]]
*''Hero of the Imperium'' (Contains ''For the Emperor'', ''Caves of Ice'', and ''The Traitor's Hand'', as well as three short stories)
**''For the Emperor!''
**''Caves of Ice''
**''The Traitor's Hand''
**''The Beguiling''
**''Fight or Flight''
**''Echoes of the Tomb''
*''Defender of the Imperium'' (Contains ''Death or Glory'', ''Duty Calls'', and ''Cain's Last Stand'', as well as two short stories)
**''Death or Glory''
**''Duty Calls''
**''Cain's Last Stand''
**''Traitor's Gambit''
**''Sector Thirteen''
*''The Emperor's Finest''
*''The Last Ditch''
*''The Greater Good''
*''Old Soliders Never Die(Seemingly the last Ciaphas Cain book as it appears that Sandy Mitchell has stopped working for the black library to everyone's sadness.)
*''The Smallest Detail'' is a standalone short (9 pages) story starring Jurgen, rather than Cain himself.

==Trivia==
* He is essentially the "Edmund Blackadder" of the ''Warhammer 40k'' universe. More specifically, he is the Captain Edmund Blackadder of ''Blackadder Goes Forth'' for ''Warhammer 40k'' universe. Like Captain Blackadder, he is always trying to avoid combat, escape death, and retire from the Imperial Guard. Jurgen can be considered as Cain's "Baldrick" - dirty, disregarded, not all that bright but a good dogsbody to Cain. (Though a slightly more intelligent and significantly more badass Baldrick; think a cross between Baldrick from series 1 and the later Baldricks, but with a melta. Also, Cain respects Jurgen.)
* Alternately, he is the Sir Harry Paget Flashman (VC KCB KCIE) of the 'Flashman' series of novels for the ''Warhammer 40k'' universe. Flashman was a key inspiration for Edmund Blackadder (although not of the first series; that was different). Seriously, look those books up. They're fantastic.
* Juren can be thought of as Fraser's other classic character Private McAuslan, J., 2nd Gordon Highlanders, Dirtiest Soldier in the World, the Tartan Caliban and the Highland Division's Answer to Peking Man. Think Pigpen in a kilt. Jurgen, however, appears to be smarter and has a Russian rather than a Glaswegian accent.
* According to the narrator of his books (no, really) he uses the Lord Commissar rules on the tabletop, but this has become impossible in 8th edition sinc Lord Commissars (and normal Commissars) cannot wield chainswords or laspistols.
* He is so [[awesome]] that to this day he remains the only entity in the galaxy to bypass [[Games Workshop]]'s invisible barrier on moving the setting forward to the 42nd Millennium until the Gathering Storm happened.
* He is also so awesome, that even when dead and buried in front of thousands as a war hero, he is permanently marked as being on active duty because of the number of times he was believed to be dead only to come back from Emperor knows where.
* A pretty good fanfic called ''Tales from the Black Millennium'' has Edmund Blackadder in command of an Imperial Guard regiment. Its sadly unfinished sequel ''More Tales from the Black Millennium'' drags Ciaphas Cain into the mix.

==Stats==
===Commissar Ciaphas Cain, Hero of the Imperium!===
{| border="1" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="5" align="left"
!
!Pts
! WS
! BS
! S
! T
! W
! I
! A
! Ld
! Sv
! Unit Type
! Composition
|-
| Ciaphas Cain
| 175
| 6
| 5
| 3
| 3
| 3
| 3
| 3
| 10
| 4+
| Infantry (IC)
| 1 Lord Commissar
|-
|}
 
*'''Unit Type:''' Infantry (unique) ((uses the Lord Commissar special rules along with those listed here.))
*'''Wargear:''' Carapace armour, Laspistol, Cain's Chainsword, Refractor Field.
{| border="1" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="5" align="left"
!
!S
!AP
|-
| Cain's Chainsword
| +2
| 3
|-
|}
 
*'''Special Rules:'''
**'''Aura of Discipline, Eternal Warrior, Independent Character, Night Vision, infiltrate'''
**'''Hero of the Imperium!:''' Ciaphas Cain's heroic reputation (regardless of whether it is fraudulent or not) inspires those around him to follow his example. When accompanying a unit, Ciaphas Cain, and the unit he accompanies, are Stubborn. Additionally, all units within 12" of Cain (including one he accompanies) automatically pass tests to Regroup, and may move, shoot (or Run), and declare charges normally in the turn in which they Regroup.
**'''Leader of Men:''' Even though he is a Commissar, Ciaphas Cain can never use Summary Execution, as this would mean one less body standing between him and danger. He may still execute a Psyker that failed Perils of the Warp test, as per the It's For Your Own Good rule.
**'''Pintle Gunner:''' While Ciaphas Cain is embarked on a transport vehicle, that vehicle may fire one pintle weapon using Ciaphas Cain's Ballistic Skill, even if the weapon would otherwise fire at Ballistic Skill 1 (firing snap shots, for instance). The other weapons it is normally allowed to fire do so at their normal Ballistic Skill.
**'''Survival Instincts:''' Commissar Cain's focus on personal safety, and experience in surviving dangerous situations allows him, and any unit he joins, to avoid danger. Cain and any unit he is attached to add 1 to their cover saves. This operates as, and stacks with, the stealth special rule. When he is embarked on a transport, the transport gets the same benefit. The transport may not gain 6+ cover save if it does not have one.
**'''Defensive Fencing Technique:''' Ciaphas Cain developed his own unique fencing style, which revolves around defensive stances, evasion, counter-attack, and running away. Ciaphas Cain adds 4 to his WS when determining how difficult he is to hit in melee. Furthermore, anyone attempting a Glorious Intervention to get him out of a challenge automatically succeeds.
**'''Run Like Frak!''' - Ciaphas Cain, and any unit he is attached to, has the Hit and Run special rule, except that they only roll 2d6 inches for the fleeing distance (he can only run so fast!) and always use Cain's Initiative +2 for the test (he's *always* ready to leg it).
*'''Options:''' Commissar Ciaphas Cain may be accompanied by Gunner Jurgen (130 pts.)
*'''Transport:''' Commissar Ciaphas Cain may take a Chimera or a Salamander as dedicated transport.

===Gunner Jurgen===
130 pts
{| border="1" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="5" align="left"
!
!Pts
! WS
! BS
! S
! T
! W
! I
! A
! Ld
! Sv
! Unit Type
! Composition
|-
| Gunner Jurgen
| 130
| 3
| 4
| 3
| 3
| 2
| 3
| 1
| 9
| 4+
| Infantry (IC)
| 1
|-
|}
 
*'''Unit Type:''' Infantry (unique)
*'''Wargear:''' Carapace armour, Lasgun, Meltagun, Frag and Krak grenades.
*'''Special Rules:'''
**'''Look Out - Aargh!, Preferred Enemy (Orks)'''
**'''Commissar's Aide:''' Gunner Jurgen counts as an Independent Character, but must always accompany Ciaphas Cain, joining and leaving units together with him. If Cain is removed as a casualty, Jurgen drags him off the field, and is also removed.
**'''Inconspicuous:''' Gunner Jurgen may not issue challenges, or be the target of a challenge. He may only enter a challenge via the Stand Back, Commissar rule below.
**'''Robust Driving Style:''' While Jurgen is embarked in a transport vehicle, that vehicle is not required to take difficult terrain tests, and treats dangerous terrain as difficult. Additionally, the vehicle may move an additional 3" during its movement phase, and is a Tank if it was not one already.
**'''Robust Body Odor and Psoriasis:''' When a unit successfully Falls Back from melee with Jurgen or a unit he is attached to, it adds 1" to the distance it flees.
**'''Psychic Blank:''' Psykers and Daemons, friend or foe, within 12" of Gunner Jurgen have -3 Leadership, do not generate any Warp Charge (i.e. they do not add dice to their owning player’s Warp Charge Pool in the Psychic phase) and only harness Warp Charge points on a 6.
**'''Stand Back, Commissar (aka Jurgen Ex Machina):''' Gunner Jurgen may not enter a challenge other than through Glorious Intervention to replace Commissar Ciaphas Cain, and he automatically passes the Initiative test to do so. Instead of making a close combat attack, at Jurgen's Initiative turn, he may make a ranged attack with his meltagun. Note that since the enemy will be within 2" of Jurgen, Melta rule for target within 1/2 weapon range applies.
**'''Scrounger:''' Jurgen's voluminous collection of odds and ends can come in handy for offering that one unexpected edge. Once per game, Ciaphas or Jurgen may reroll any one die they are called upon to roll.

==See Also==
[[If I Had Known...]] - A tentative story about Warhammer 40k's three most famous Commissars (Incomplete: Still at Prologue)

==External Links==
*[http://wh40k.lexicanum.com/wiki/Ciaphas_Cain Lexicanum page on Cain]
Cain now has his own (well sculpted) mini: https://www.google.com/search?q=heroic+commissar+miniature&tbm=isch&tbo=u&source=univ&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwisyqWcwKLWAhXiy1QKHXACAIQQsAQIKA&biw=1680&bih=931#imgrc=wGzaajMxETE5BM:&spf=1505317380502

{{IG-Characters}}

[[Category:Commissars]][[category:Literature]]

Ciaphas Cain

2018-01-09T01:30:02Z

2A02:587:3A0A:6B00:E088:4BA2:4059:3AB1:

[[Image:cain.jpg|300px|thumb|right|Hero of the Imperium, fighting the grim-derp since 2002]]
{{Topquote|I learned that courage was not the absence of fear, but the triumph over it. The brave man is not he who does not feel afraid, but he who conquers that fear.|Nelson Mandela}}

'''Ciaphas Cain, (Accidental) [[Hero of the Imperium|HERO OF THE IMPERIUM]]!!!''' was a famous [[Commissar]] of the [[Imperium of Man|Imperium]] and is the protagonist of the eponymous series of novels by [[Sandy Mitchell]]. The GRIMDARK Flashman to [[Colonel-Commissar Ibram Gaunt|Gaunt's]] Sharpe. He spent most of his career in active service attached to [[Imperial Guard]] regiments from the ice world of [[Valhalla]]—most notably the 597th, and accompanied by his aide [[Jurgen]]. He retired to become a professor at a [[Schola Progenium]] later in life, but this did not mark the end of his exploits, being recalled into active service during the [[Black Crusade#13th Black Crusade|13th Black Crusade]]. He was also called upon at many points throughout his life to assist the [[Alienhunters|Ordos Xenos]] [[Inquisitor]] [[Amberley Vail]], who is almost certainly his lover.

The novels are presented as extracts from Cain's personal, unofficial memoirs, edited by Amberley—published only to and kept under lock and key by the [[Inquisition]] as they present a vastly different story to all the official Imperial propaganda about his adventures. Contrary to the heroic image he cultivated to the Imperium at large, Cain described himself as a self-serving coward in his memoirs, spending most of his time trying to ensure his own comfort and survival, only becoming a hero by accident. However, despite his self-deprecation, he routinely demonstrates great bravery and compassion in the stories, leading many to believe he is a much better person than he would admit to himself. In any event, he always subscribed to the long-term version of cowardice, often taking courses of action that appeared extremely dangerous on the basis that they gave him a better chance of survival in the long term, if not the short one.

He is also well known for being one of the few commissars to earn the trust and respect of the Guardsmen he served with—aided by his heroic reputation, but mainly because he persistently demonstrated care and concern for the soldiers of his regiment. Despite repeated insistence in his memoirs he merely did this to get on their good sides, there's a great deal of evidence that his feelings were genuine.

Cain himself was an extremely skilled combatant, being an excellent shot with his trusty [[laspistol]] and highly proficient in the use of his [[chainsword]] in melee. Amongst other things, he defeated an [[Ork]] [[warboss]] and stood up to two [[Chaos Space Marines]] in single combat, both incredible feats for an ordinary man, especially as the only bionics he possessed were a few replacement fingers. Not to mention going toe to toe with ''two'' [[Tyranid]] [[Hive Tyrant]]s, and wounding them both before his men can help him. Mind you, even ranged Hive Tyrants can rip up an [[Assault Squad|Assault Marine]] and eat him without too much effort. Further exploits include holding his own against a fucking [[Daemon]] Princess pretty well (with Jurgen's help, but still he did better than most would have), defeating [[Genestealer]]s in close combat (one of which could kill two [[Word Bearers]] and severely injure a third in a matter of seconds), and standing his ground against a fucking Genestealer Patriarch/[[Broodlord]]. He also has the honour of being forever listed on "Active Battle Duty", according to official records, despite being buried with full battle honours in the early M42's; this is because, in the course of his exploits, he had been assumed to have died only to reappear later so many times that the [[Administratum]] couldn't keep up with the paperwork and simply issued a general order that his recorded status not be changed despite any evidence apparently to the contrary. Of course, his legacy is such that saying he's still in service to the Imperium wouldn't be far wrong...

[[Image:Mavel.jpg|800px|thumb|left|Marvel Heroes of the 3rd Millenium Imperium]]

==The Novels==
Essentially, George MacDonald Fraser's [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Harry_Paget_Flashman The Flashman Papers] and McAuslan stories transplanted into the 41st Millennium, though, while Cain is more of a Coward with a Heart of Gold, Flashman can best be described as a Jerk with a Heart of Jerk, Braised in a Jamaican Jerk Sauce, then Dried out into Jerked Jerk Jerky.

Whilst the books are quite well-written, [[Sandy Mitchell]] is a big fan of recycling - even down to specific sentences. Hence each book ''is guaranteed'' to feature exactly the same descriptions of his aide [[Jurgen]] as all the others, someone doing something with "almost indecent haste", and about half a dozen variations on the theme, "Of course, if I knew what I was getting myself into by doing [x], I'd have rather charged into the [[Eye of Terror]] with nothing but a rusty fork."

They are also notable for the Jurgen Ex Machina, where most of the dramatic fights are ended by the intervention of Cain's aide Jurgen armed with a [[melta]]gun and his powers as a [[psyker]]-disrupting "[[blank]]". Over the course of the series, Jurgen has racked up more kills than the rest of the Valhallan 597th put together, and has yet to have any character development whatsoever. But that's fine, because Jurgen is 125% distilled [[awesome]].

While it's unclear if this is an issue with Cain or Mitchell, the books also can't seem to tell the difference between a heavy bolter and a storm bolter, using the terms interchangeablly to the point where it can sometimes be difficult to figure out which particular weapon is actually being described.

Also features psychotic lesbian Valhallans, Orky Gargants crumpin' dose [[Necron]] gits, a grinning, friendly neighborhood Inquisitor (who you should flee from at all costs), psychotic psykers who wear dresses too small, savants that are barred from entering casinos, [[World Eaters]] getting killed by "mere" humans, surviving a starship crash, playing ''[[Space Hulk]]'' for real, blue facepainted [[Tau]] supporters yelling that you can take their lives, but not their freedom, and the Harriers getting the goddamn cup, didn't get it though. [[Awesome|And Space Daemon Werewolf Psyker Hitler being kicked over a dam by a solid boot to the arse]].

==Cain Books and Collected Short Stories==
[[File:CAIN-TRUEHERO.jpg|300px|thumb|right|Cain, summed up in all his glory. (The actual SCENE is from ''The Traitor's Hand''.)]]
*''Hero of the Imperium'' (Contains ''For the Emperor'', ''Caves of Ice'', and ''The Traitor's Hand'', as well as three short stories)
**''For the Emperor!''
**''Caves of Ice''
**''The Traitor's Hand''
**''The Beguiling''
**''Fight or Flight''
**''Echoes of the Tomb''
*''Defender of the Imperium'' (Contains ''Death or Glory'', ''Duty Calls'', and ''Cain's Last Stand'', as well as two short stories)
**''Death or Glory''
**''Duty Calls''
**''Cain's Last Stand''
**''Traitor's Gambit''
**''Sector Thirteen''
*''The Emperor's Finest''
*''The Last Ditch''
*''The Greater Good''
*''Old Soliders Never Die(Seemingly the last Ciaphas Cain book as it appears that Sandy Mitchell has stopped working for the black library to everyone's sadness.)
*''The Smallest Detail'' is a standalone short (9 pages) story starring Jurgen, rather than Cain himself.

==Trivia==
* He is essentially the "Edmund Blackadder" of the ''Warhammer 40k'' universe. More specifically, he is the Captain Edmund Blackadder of ''Blackadder Goes Forth'' for ''Warhammer 40k'' universe. Like Captain Blackadder, he is always trying to avoid combat, escape death, and retire from the Imperial Guard. Jurgen can be considered as Cain's "Baldrick" - dirty, disregarded, not all that bright but a good dogsbody to Cain. (Though a slightly more intelligent and significantly more badass Baldrick; think a cross between Baldrick from series 1 and the later Baldricks, but with a melta. Also, Cain respects Jurgen.)
* Alternately, he is the Sir Harry Paget Flashman (VC KCB KCIE) of the 'Flashman' series of novels for the ''Warhammer 40k'' universe. Flashman was a key inspiration for Edmund Blackadder (although not of the first series; that was different). Seriously, look those books up. They're fantastic.
* Juren can be thought of as Fraser's other classic character Private McAuslan, J., 2nd Gordon Highlanders, Dirtiest Soldier in the World, the Tartan Caliban and the Highland Division's Answer to Peking Man. Think Pigpen in a kilt. Jurgen, however, appears to be smarter and has a Russian rather than a Glaswegian accent.
* According to the narrator of his books (no, really) he uses the Lord Commissar rules on the tabletop, but this has become impossible in 8th edition sinc Lord Commissars (and normal Commissars) cannot wield chainswords or laspistols.
* He is so [[awesome]] that to this day he remains the only entity in the galaxy to bypass [[Games Workshop]]'s invisible barrier on moving the setting forward to the 42nd Millennium until the Gathering Storm happened.
* He is also so awesome, that even when dead and buried in front of thousands as a war hero, he is permanently marked as being on active duty because of the number of times he was believed to be dead only to come back from Emperor knows where.
* A pretty good fanfic called ''Tales from the Black Millennium'' has Edmund Blackadder in command of an Imperial Guard regiment. Its sadly unfinished sequel ''More Tales from the Black Millennium'' drags Ciaphas Cain into the mix.

==Stats==
===Commissar Ciaphas Cain, Hero of the Imperium!===
{| border="1" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="5" align="left"
!
!Pts
! WS
! BS
! S
! T
! W
! I
! A
! Ld
! Sv
! Unit Type
! Composition
|-
| Ciaphas Cain
| 175
| 6
| 5
| 3
| 3
| 3
| 3
| 3
| 10
| 4+
| Infantry (IC)
| 1 Lord Commissar
|-
|}
 
*'''Unit Type:''' Infantry (unique) ((uses the Lord Commissar special rules along with those listed here.))
*'''Wargear:''' Carapace armour, Laspistol, Cain's Chainsword, Refractor Field.
{| border="1" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="5" align="left"
!
!S
!AP
|-
| Cain's Chainsword
| +2
| 3
|-
|}
 
*'''Special Rules:'''
**'''Aura of Discipline, Eternal Warrior, Independent Character, Night Vision, infiltrate'''
**'''Hero of the Imperium!:''' Ciaphas Cain's heroic reputation (regardless of whether it is fraudulent or not) inspires those around him to follow his example. When accompanying a unit, Ciaphas Cain, and the unit he accompanies, are Stubborn. Additionally, all units within 12" of Cain (including one he accompanies) automatically pass tests to Regroup, and may move, shoot (or Run), and declare charges normally in the turn in which they Regroup.
**'''Leader of Men:''' Even though he is a Commissar, Ciaphas Cain can never use Summary Execution, as this would mean one less body standing between him and danger. He may still execute a Psyker that failed Perils of the Warp test, as per the It's For Your Own Good rule.
**'''Pintle Gunner:''' While Ciaphas Cain is embarked on a transport vehicle, that vehicle may fire one pintle weapon using Ciaphas Cain's Ballistic Skill, even if the weapon would otherwise fire at Ballistic Skill 1 (firing snap shots, for instance). The other weapons it is normally allowed to fire do so at their normal Ballistic Skill.
**'''Survival Instincts:''' Commissar Cain's focus on personal safety, and experience in surviving dangerous situations allows him, and any unit he joins, to avoid danger. Cain and any unit he is attached to add 1 to their cover saves. This operates as, and stacks with, the stealth special rule. When he is embarked on a transport, the transport gets the same benefit. The transport may not gain 6+ cover save if it does not have one.
**'''Defensive Fencing Technique:''' Ciaphas Cain developed his own unique fencing style, which revolves around defensive stances, evasion, counter-attack, and running away. Ciaphas Cain adds 4 to his WS when determining how difficult he is to hit in melee. Furthermore, anyone attempting a Glorious Intervention to get him out of a challenge automatically succeeds.
**'''Run Like Frak!''' - Ciaphas Cain, and any unit he is attached to, has the Hit and Run special rule, except that they only roll 2d6 inches for the fleeing distance (he can only run so fast!) and always use Cain's Initiative +2 for the test (he's *always* ready to leg it).
*'''Options:''' Commissar Ciaphas Cain may be accompanied by Gunner Jurgen (130 pts.)
*'''Transport:''' Commissar Ciaphas Cain may take a Chimera or a Salamander as dedicated transport.

===Gunner Jurgen===
130 pts
{| border="1" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="5" align="left"
!
!Pts
! WS
! BS
! S
! T
! W
! I
! A
! Ld
! Sv
! Unit Type
! Composition
|-
| Gunner Jurgen
| 130
| 3
| 4
| 3
| 3
| 2
| 3
| 1
| 9
| 4+
| Infantry (IC)
| 1
|-
|}
 
*'''Unit Type:''' Infantry (unique)
*'''Wargear:''' Carapace armour, Lasgun, Meltagun, Frag and Krak grenades.
*'''Special Rules:'''
**'''Look Out - Aargh!, Preferred Enemy (Orks)'''
**'''Commissar's Aide:''' Gunner Jurgen counts as an Independent Character, but must always accompany Ciaphas Cain, joining and leaving units together with him. If Cain is removed as a casualty, Jurgen drags him off the field, and is also removed.
**'''Inconspicuous:''' Gunner Jurgen may not issue challenges, or be the target of a challenge. He may only enter a challenge via the Stand Back, Commissar rule below.
**'''Robust Driving Style:''' While Jurgen is embarked in a transport vehicle, that vehicle is not required to take difficult terrain tests, and treats dangerous terrain as difficult. Additionally, the vehicle may move an additional 3" during its movement phase, and is a Tank if it was not one already.
**'''Robust Body Odor and Psoriasis:''' When a unit successfully Falls Back from melee with Jurgen or a unit he is attached to, it adds 1" to the distance it flees.
**'''Psychic Blank:''' Psykers and Daemons, friend or foe, within 12" of Gunner Jurgen have -3 Leadership, do not generate any Warp Charge (i.e. they do not add dice to their owning player’s Warp Charge Pool in the Psychic phase) and only harness Warp Charge points on a 6.
**'''Stand Back, Commissar (aka Jurgen Ex Machina):''' Gunner Jurgen may not enter a challenge other than through Glorious Intervention to replace Commissar Ciaphas Cain, and he automatically passes the Initiative test to do so. Instead of making a close combat attack, at Jurgen's Initiative turn, he may make a ranged attack with his meltagun. Note that since the enemy will be within 2" of Jurgen, Melta rule for target within 1/2 weapon range applies.
**'''Scrounger:''' Jurgen's voluminous collection of odds and ends can come in handy for offering that one unexpected edge. Once per game, Ciaphas or Jurgen may reroll any one die they are called upon to roll.

==See Also==
[[If I Had Known...]] - A tentative story about Warhammer 40k's three most famous Commissars (Incomplete: Still at Prologue)

==External Links==
*[http://wh40k.lexicanum.com/wiki/Ciaphas_Cain Lexicanum page on Cain]
Cain now has his own (well sculpted) mini: https://www.google.com/search?q=heroic+commissar+miniature&tbm=isch&tbo=u&source=univ&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwisyqWcwKLWAhXiy1QKHXACAIQQsAQIKA&biw=1680&bih=931#imgrc=wGzaajMxETE5BM:&spf=1505317380502

{{IG-Characters}}

[[Category:Commissars]][[category:Literature]]

Ciaphas Cain

2018-01-09T01:29:31Z

2A02:587:3A0A:6B00:E088:4BA2:4059:3AB1:

[[Image:cain.jpg|300px|thumb|right|Hero of the Imperium, fighting the grim-derp since 2002]]
{{Topquote|I learned that courage was not the absence of fear, but the triumph over it. The brave man is not he who does not feel afraid, but he who conquers that fear.|Nelson Mandela}}

'''Ciaphas Cain, (Accidental) [[Hero of the Imperium|HERO OF THE IMPERIUM]]!!!''' was a famous [[Commissar]] of the [[Imperium of Man|Imperium]] and is the protagonist of the eponymous series of novels by [[Sandy Mitchell]]. The GRIMDARK Flashman to [[Colonel-Commissar Ibram Gaunt|Gaunt's]] Sharpe. He spent most of his career in active service attached to [[Imperial Guard]] regiments from the ice world of [[Valhalla]]—most notably the 597th, and accompanied by his aide [[Jurgen]]. He retired to become a professor at a [[Schola Progenium]] later in life, but this did not mark the end of his exploits, being recalled into active service during the [[Black Crusade#13th Black Crusade|13th Black Crusade]]. He was also called upon at many points throughout his life to assist the [[Alienhunters|Ordos Xenos]] [[Inquisitor]] [[Amberley Vail]], who is almost certainly his lover.

The novels are presented as extracts from Cain's personal, unofficial memoirs, edited by Amberley—published only to and kept under lock and key by the [[Inquisition]] as they present a vastly different story to all the official Imperial propaganda about his adventures. Contrary to the heroic image he cultivated to the Imperium at large, Cain described himself as a self-serving coward in his memoirs, spending most of his time trying to ensure his own comfort and survival, only becoming a hero by accident. However, despite his self-deprecation, he routinely demonstrates great bravery and compassion in the stories, leading many to believe he is a much better person than he would admit to himself. In any event, he always subscribed to the long-term version of cowardice, often taking courses of action that appeared extremely dangerous on the basis that they gave him a better chance of survival in the long term, if not the short one.

He is also well known for being one of the few commissars to earn the trust and respect of the Guardsmen he served with—aided by his heroic reputation, but mainly because he persistently demonstrated care and concern for the soldiers of his regiment. Despite repeated insistence in his memoirs he merely did this to get on their good sides, there's a great deal of evidence that his feelings were genuine.

Cain himself was an extremely skilled combatant, being an excellent shot with his trusty [[laspistol]] and highly proficient in the use of his [[chainsword]] in melee. Amongst other things, he defeated an [[Ork]] [[warboss]] and stood up to two [[Chaos Space Marines]] in single combat, both incredible feats for an ordinary man, especially as the only bionics he possessed were a few replacement fingers. Not to mention going toe to toe with ''two'' [[Tyranid]] [[Hive Tyrant]]s, and wounding them both before his men can help him. Mind you, even ranged Hive Tyrants can rip up an [[Assault Squad|Assault Marine]] and eat him without too much effort. Further exploits include holding his own against a fucking [[Daemon]] Princess pretty well (with Jurgen's help, but still he did better than most would have), defeating [[Genestealer]]s in close combat (one of which could kill two [[Word Bearers]] and severely injure a third in a matter of seconds), and standing his ground against a fucking Genestealer Patriarch/[[Broodlord]]. He also has the honour of being forever listed on "Active Battle Duty", according to official records, despite being buried with full battle honours in the early M42's; this is because, in the course of his exploits, he had been assumed to have died only to reappear later so many times that the [[Administratum]] couldn't keep up with the paperwork and simply issued a general order that his recorded status not be changed despite any evidence apparently to the contrary. Of course, his legacy is such that saying he's still in service to the Imperium wouldn't be far wrong...

[[Image:Marvel.jpg|800px|thumb|left|Marvel Heroes of the 3rd Millenium Imperium]]

==The Novels==
Essentially, George MacDonald Fraser's [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Harry_Paget_Flashman The Flashman Papers] and McAuslan stories transplanted into the 41st Millennium, though, while Cain is more of a Coward with a Heart of Gold, Flashman can best be described as a Jerk with a Heart of Jerk, Braised in a Jamaican Jerk Sauce, then Dried out into Jerked Jerk Jerky.

Whilst the books are quite well-written, [[Sandy Mitchell]] is a big fan of recycling - even down to specific sentences. Hence each book ''is guaranteed'' to feature exactly the same descriptions of his aide [[Jurgen]] as all the others, someone doing something with "almost indecent haste", and about half a dozen variations on the theme, "Of course, if I knew what I was getting myself into by doing [x], I'd have rather charged into the [[Eye of Terror]] with nothing but a rusty fork."

They are also notable for the Jurgen Ex Machina, where most of the dramatic fights are ended by the intervention of Cain's aide Jurgen armed with a [[melta]]gun and his powers as a [[psyker]]-disrupting "[[blank]]". Over the course of the series, Jurgen has racked up more kills than the rest of the Valhallan 597th put together, and has yet to have any character development whatsoever. But that's fine, because Jurgen is 125% distilled [[awesome]].

While it's unclear if this is an issue with Cain or Mitchell, the books also can't seem to tell the difference between a heavy bolter and a storm bolter, using the terms interchangeablly to the point where it can sometimes be difficult to figure out which particular weapon is actually being described.

Also features psychotic lesbian Valhallans, Orky Gargants crumpin' dose [[Necron]] gits, a grinning, friendly neighborhood Inquisitor (who you should flee from at all costs), psychotic psykers who wear dresses too small, savants that are barred from entering casinos, [[World Eaters]] getting killed by "mere" humans, surviving a starship crash, playing ''[[Space Hulk]]'' for real, blue facepainted [[Tau]] supporters yelling that you can take their lives, but not their freedom, and the Harriers getting the goddamn cup, didn't get it though. [[Awesome|And Space Daemon Werewolf Psyker Hitler being kicked over a dam by a solid boot to the arse]].

==Cain Books and Collected Short Stories==
[[File:CAIN-TRUEHERO.jpg|300px|thumb|right|Cain, summed up in all his glory. (The actual SCENE is from ''The Traitor's Hand''.)]]
*''Hero of the Imperium'' (Contains ''For the Emperor'', ''Caves of Ice'', and ''The Traitor's Hand'', as well as three short stories)
**''For the Emperor!''
**''Caves of Ice''
**''The Traitor's Hand''
**''The Beguiling''
**''Fight or Flight''
**''Echoes of the Tomb''
*''Defender of the Imperium'' (Contains ''Death or Glory'', ''Duty Calls'', and ''Cain's Last Stand'', as well as two short stories)
**''Death or Glory''
**''Duty Calls''
**''Cain's Last Stand''
**''Traitor's Gambit''
**''Sector Thirteen''
*''The Emperor's Finest''
*''The Last Ditch''
*''The Greater Good''
*''Old Soliders Never Die(Seemingly the last Ciaphas Cain book as it appears that Sandy Mitchell has stopped working for the black library to everyone's sadness.)
*''The Smallest Detail'' is a standalone short (9 pages) story starring Jurgen, rather than Cain himself.

==Trivia==
* He is essentially the "Edmund Blackadder" of the ''Warhammer 40k'' universe. More specifically, he is the Captain Edmund Blackadder of ''Blackadder Goes Forth'' for ''Warhammer 40k'' universe. Like Captain Blackadder, he is always trying to avoid combat, escape death, and retire from the Imperial Guard. Jurgen can be considered as Cain's "Baldrick" - dirty, disregarded, not all that bright but a good dogsbody to Cain. (Though a slightly more intelligent and significantly more badass Baldrick; think a cross between Baldrick from series 1 and the later Baldricks, but with a melta. Also, Cain respects Jurgen.)
* Alternately, he is the Sir Harry Paget Flashman (VC KCB KCIE) of the 'Flashman' series of novels for the ''Warhammer 40k'' universe. Flashman was a key inspiration for Edmund Blackadder (although not of the first series; that was different). Seriously, look those books up. They're fantastic.
* Juren can be thought of as Fraser's other classic character Private McAuslan, J., 2nd Gordon Highlanders, Dirtiest Soldier in the World, the Tartan Caliban and the Highland Division's Answer to Peking Man. Think Pigpen in a kilt. Jurgen, however, appears to be smarter and has a Russian rather than a Glaswegian accent.
* According to the narrator of his books (no, really) he uses the Lord Commissar rules on the tabletop, but this has become impossible in 8th edition sinc Lord Commissars (and normal Commissars) cannot wield chainswords or laspistols.
* He is so [[awesome]] that to this day he remains the only entity in the galaxy to bypass [[Games Workshop]]'s invisible barrier on moving the setting forward to the 42nd Millennium until the Gathering Storm happened.
* He is also so awesome, that even when dead and buried in front of thousands as a war hero, he is permanently marked as being on active duty because of the number of times he was believed to be dead only to come back from Emperor knows where.
* A pretty good fanfic called ''Tales from the Black Millennium'' has Edmund Blackadder in command of an Imperial Guard regiment. Its sadly unfinished sequel ''More Tales from the Black Millennium'' drags Ciaphas Cain into the mix.

==Stats==
===Commissar Ciaphas Cain, Hero of the Imperium!===
{| border="1" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="5" align="left"
!
!Pts
! WS
! BS
! S
! T
! W
! I
! A
! Ld
! Sv
! Unit Type
! Composition
|-
| Ciaphas Cain
| 175
| 6
| 5
| 3
| 3
| 3
| 3
| 3
| 10
| 4+
| Infantry (IC)
| 1 Lord Commissar
|-
|}
 
*'''Unit Type:''' Infantry (unique) ((uses the Lord Commissar special rules along with those listed here.))
*'''Wargear:''' Carapace armour, Laspistol, Cain's Chainsword, Refractor Field.
{| border="1" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="5" align="left"
!
!S
!AP
|-
| Cain's Chainsword
| +2
| 3
|-
|}
 
*'''Special Rules:'''
**'''Aura of Discipline, Eternal Warrior, Independent Character, Night Vision, infiltrate'''
**'''Hero of the Imperium!:''' Ciaphas Cain's heroic reputation (regardless of whether it is fraudulent or not) inspires those around him to follow his example. When accompanying a unit, Ciaphas Cain, and the unit he accompanies, are Stubborn. Additionally, all units within 12" of Cain (including one he accompanies) automatically pass tests to Regroup, and may move, shoot (or Run), and declare charges normally in the turn in which they Regroup.
**'''Leader of Men:''' Even though he is a Commissar, Ciaphas Cain can never use Summary Execution, as this would mean one less body standing between him and danger. He may still execute a Psyker that failed Perils of the Warp test, as per the It's For Your Own Good rule.
**'''Pintle Gunner:''' While Ciaphas Cain is embarked on a transport vehicle, that vehicle may fire one pintle weapon using Ciaphas Cain's Ballistic Skill, even if the weapon would otherwise fire at Ballistic Skill 1 (firing snap shots, for instance). The other weapons it is normally allowed to fire do so at their normal Ballistic Skill.
**'''Survival Instincts:''' Commissar Cain's focus on personal safety, and experience in surviving dangerous situations allows him, and any unit he joins, to avoid danger. Cain and any unit he is attached to add 1 to their cover saves. This operates as, and stacks with, the stealth special rule. When he is embarked on a transport, the transport gets the same benefit. The transport may not gain 6+ cover save if it does not have one.
**'''Defensive Fencing Technique:''' Ciaphas Cain developed his own unique fencing style, which revolves around defensive stances, evasion, counter-attack, and running away. Ciaphas Cain adds 4 to his WS when determining how difficult he is to hit in melee. Furthermore, anyone attempting a Glorious Intervention to get him out of a challenge automatically succeeds.
**'''Run Like Frak!''' - Ciaphas Cain, and any unit he is attached to, has the Hit and Run special rule, except that they only roll 2d6 inches for the fleeing distance (he can only run so fast!) and always use Cain's Initiative +2 for the test (he's *always* ready to leg it).
*'''Options:''' Commissar Ciaphas Cain may be accompanied by Gunner Jurgen (130 pts.)
*'''Transport:''' Commissar Ciaphas Cain may take a Chimera or a Salamander as dedicated transport.

===Gunner Jurgen===
130 pts
{| border="1" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="5" align="left"
!
!Pts
! WS
! BS
! S
! T
! W
! I
! A
! Ld
! Sv
! Unit Type
! Composition
|-
| Gunner Jurgen
| 130
| 3
| 4
| 3
| 3
| 2
| 3
| 1
| 9
| 4+
| Infantry (IC)
| 1
|-
|}
 
*'''Unit Type:''' Infantry (unique)
*'''Wargear:''' Carapace armour, Lasgun, Meltagun, Frag and Krak grenades.
*'''Special Rules:'''
**'''Look Out - Aargh!, Preferred Enemy (Orks)'''
**'''Commissar's Aide:''' Gunner Jurgen counts as an Independent Character, but must always accompany Ciaphas Cain, joining and leaving units together with him. If Cain is removed as a casualty, Jurgen drags him off the field, and is also removed.
**'''Inconspicuous:''' Gunner Jurgen may not issue challenges, or be the target of a challenge. He may only enter a challenge via the Stand Back, Commissar rule below.
**'''Robust Driving Style:''' While Jurgen is embarked in a transport vehicle, that vehicle is not required to take difficult terrain tests, and treats dangerous terrain as difficult. Additionally, the vehicle may move an additional 3" during its movement phase, and is a Tank if it was not one already.
**'''Robust Body Odor and Psoriasis:''' When a unit successfully Falls Back from melee with Jurgen or a unit he is attached to, it adds 1" to the distance it flees.
**'''Psychic Blank:''' Psykers and Daemons, friend or foe, within 12" of Gunner Jurgen have -3 Leadership, do not generate any Warp Charge (i.e. they do not add dice to their owning player’s Warp Charge Pool in the Psychic phase) and only harness Warp Charge points on a 6.
**'''Stand Back, Commissar (aka Jurgen Ex Machina):''' Gunner Jurgen may not enter a challenge other than through Glorious Intervention to replace Commissar Ciaphas Cain, and he automatically passes the Initiative test to do so. Instead of making a close combat attack, at Jurgen's Initiative turn, he may make a ranged attack with his meltagun. Note that since the enemy will be within 2" of Jurgen, Melta rule for target within 1/2 weapon range applies.
**'''Scrounger:''' Jurgen's voluminous collection of odds and ends can come in handy for offering that one unexpected edge. Once per game, Ciaphas or Jurgen may reroll any one die they are called upon to roll.

==See Also==
[[If I Had Known...]] - A tentative story about Warhammer 40k's three most famous Commissars (Incomplete: Still at Prologue)

==External Links==
*[http://wh40k.lexicanum.com/wiki/Ciaphas_Cain Lexicanum page on Cain]
Cain now has his own (well sculpted) mini: https://www.google.com/search?q=heroic+commissar+miniature&tbm=isch&tbo=u&source=univ&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwisyqWcwKLWAhXiy1QKHXACAIQQsAQIKA&biw=1680&bih=931#imgrc=wGzaajMxETE5BM:&spf=1505317380502

{{IG-Characters}}

[[Category:Commissars]][[category:Literature]]