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The God-Emperor of Mankind

2017-11-03T17:49:11Z

2A02:C7F:4006:2900:70D0:365F:B01A:862:

[[File:Lord of Mankind.jpg|400px|right|thumb|Liberating the galaxy is one thing, but he was so Fucking gay, he never once stopped looking ''fabulous'' while doing it. And [[Sigmar|manly]]]]
<div style="text-align:center;font-size:1.10em;font-weight:normal;font-style:normal;font-family:serif;margin-top:1em;margin-bottom:1em"> I have come to eradicate Religion as it is the bane of Man, warped in superstition, ignorance and fear! - The Emperor before the Treason of Horus''' </div>

<blockquote>We believe in one Lord, the Emperor, the Almighty, ruler of heaven and earth, of all that is, seen and unseen. We believe in one Lord, Emperor of Mankind, the only Lord of creation, eternally begotten of Humanity, Human from Human, Light from Light, true Lord from true Lord, begotten, not made, of one Being with Humanity; through him all things were made. For us and for our salvation he came down from heaven, was incarnate of the Holy Spirit and came among us. For our sake he has faced down Chaos; he withstood death and was enthroned. To this day he lives on in accordance with the Scriptures; he resides upon Mother Terra and is seated upon the throne of Humanity. He will come again in glory to judge the living and the dead, and his kingdom will have no end.

We believe in the Holy Spirit, the Emperor, the giver of life, who proceeds from Humanity and from Terra, who with Humanity and upon Terra is worshiped and glorified,
who has spoken through the prophets. We believe in one holy true and divinely guided Ecclesiarchy. We acknowledge one path for the defense against Chaos. We look for the justice for our dead, and the life of the worlds to come.
 ++ Ayhmen ++ 
-- the [[Imperial Cult|Creed]] of the Mankind's Council of Nicene of Holy Terra (Most Christian elegan/tg/entleman will recognize it as a bastardized version of The Apostle's Creed)</blockquote>

''"Wars begin when you will, but they do not end when you please."'' 
— Niccoló Machiavelli

''Pride goes before destruction, a haughty spirit before a fall.'' 
- Proverbs 16:18

''Is God willing to prevent evil, but not able? Then he is not omnipotent.'' 
''Is he able, but not willing? Then he is malevolent.'' 
''Is he both able and willing? Then whence cometh evil?'' 
''Is he neither able nor willing? Then why call him God?'' 
- Epicurus

''One cannot reign innocently: the insanity of doing so is evident. Every king is a rebel and a usurper.'' 
- Louis Antoine de Saint-Just

''"The dignity a God enjoys on Earth is splendid, but hard to achieve for the weak. Only He who sets his soul on this objective is worthy of becoming a King."'' 
— ''Nitisâra'', IV, 4. (It also applies to Spawns and [[Demon Prince]])

''"We sacrifice to the terrible Royal Glory ''havaêm hvarenô'' created by Mazda, the supreme conquering force of high action, to which are linked salvation, wisdom and happinness, in the moightiest destruction of all things."'' 
— ''Yašts''

''The Emperor loves no one man. He cannot afford affection - that is the honest practical for the impossible task that faces the Master of Mankind. He did not love His sons, He does not love men, but He does love mankind.'' 
- Roboute Guilliman

The '''God-Emperor of Mankind''', also known as '''The Emprah''', '''Emps''', '''Big E''', '''E-Money''', '''Augustus Imperator''', '''Deus-Imperator''', '''Primogenitor''', '''[[Imperial Fists|Him on Earth]]''', '''[[Space Wolves|All-Father]]''', '''Master of Mankind''', '''The Immortal Emperor''', '''The Empinator''', '''The Fresh Emperor of Humanity''', '''Space Jesus''', '''Lord of Bling''' or if you are of [[Heresy|different inclinations]], called '''The Anathema''', '''The Carrion Lord''', '''The False Emperor''', '''The Corpse Emperor''', '''That Twat with the Chair''', '''[[If The Emperor Had a Text-To-Speech Device|That Loony Shaman-Chassis]]''', '''Space Lenin''', '''[[Tyranid|giant crunchy psychic sandwich]]''' or '''The Corpse on the Throne''' is the figurehead ruler of the [[Imperium of Man]] in the [[Warhammer 40k]] universe and is the only sustaining [[Tzeentch|Hope]] for Humanity as Faster than Light Travel is [[Astronomican|entirely dependent on Him]]. The [[Administratum]] He established, continues to govern the [[Imperium]] in His name, but it is generally accepted that the absence of the Emperor's proper guidance is what has turned the Imperium into the [[/b/|hellish mess]] that it is. In the [[Imperium]], questioning whatever your superior yells at you, is "moronic" and [[heresy|heretical]], and is typically punished by [[blam|euthanasia]] (at least in the material realm). He created the 20 [[Primarchs]], who viewed him as their "father". However, he saw them more as tools, and instead of names, referred to them by numbers. It goes without saying that would The Emperor be up and about in the 41st millennium He would be very disappointed. Most fa/tg/uys expect Him to [http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0191520/bio speak in a generic deep, stentorian voice]. Though many also would expect him to speak more like another [[Kane|immortal who wishes to guide humanity to the path of Ascension, who may as well be one of his past guises.]] Clearly the cult of the extragalactic alien self replicating space rock thing didn't work out in the end so he had to try [[Grimdark|another approach]]. It would explain why he's so fond of impractically large tanks, walkers, mecha, incredibly unaerodynamic VTOLs and bling though.

Also wrote Pinocchio, which would make Carlo Collodi one of his aliases, He also began life as a two-bit undertaker in an obscure Middle-Eastern village.

==The Entire History of the Emprah==
===Early life===
[[File:Majestica.jpg|250px|left|thumb|Big E gets all the bitches.]]
The Emperor is a [[Perpetual]]; an immortal [[psyker]] with countless lifetimes' worth of knowledge and power and the ambition to use it. According to the fluff, the being that would eventually become known as The Emperor was born in 8000 BC in Anatolia (modern-day Turkey) on the banks of the Sakarya river to a tribe of proto-[[Wikipedia:Hittites|Hittites]]. From his own account, his path towards greatness was spurred on when his uncle (possibly the biblical Cain) murdered his father (possibly Abel); so kid-Emps did the responsible thing and gave his uncle a myocardial infarction. Kid-Emps then realised that humans needed laws, and good laws needed to be given by good leaders (which he defined to refer to himself specifically): setting him on the (xeno/geno)cidal path of self-righteousness and conquest that would continue for the next 38,000 years.

Allegedly, ''(according to 1st & 2nd edition fluff)'', his birth was the result of hundreds of human shamans committing ritual suicide to be reborn as a single individual capable of protecting humanity from the [[Chaos Gods]]. However, [[Skub|the validity of this fluff is frequently questioned]], given it hasn't been "official" since second edition. However, this theory seems unlikely, especially given that other Perpetuals are known to exist, [[Ollanius Pius|some of which]] may be even older than the Emperor, and they don't have godlike powers. The Chaos Gods apparently view the Emperor as an equal/rival due to his acquisition of powers at a later point ''(see below)''. Yet other fluff tidbits imply that he is some sort of flesh-construct from the Dark Age of Technology run amok and aping human affectation. This one seems to have some level of truth to it, as Constantin Valdor neither confirmed nor denied it when a shit-kicking Nord Afrikan minister mentioned it to him.

Lore also mentions that He guided humanity throughout history under a number of guises, and many of the probable identities of the Emperor in World History may include but are not limited to Hammurabi (the first man to invent the concept of Law), Alexander the Great (the most fabulous conqueror in all of History, with the philosopher [[Malcador the Sigillite|Aristotle]] serving as his Right Hand Man), Julius Caesar (guess why the Imperium spoke Latin), Jesus (as demonstration that He will sacrifice Himself for the progress of Humanity; which is a symbolic idea, [[Skub|as pre-retcon the lore leaned towards the Emperor being one of Jesus' disciples]]), Napoleon Bonaparte (to dismantle the old stagnating monarchies of Europe and replace them with Revolutionary ideals), and Abraham Lincoln (to bitchslap some [[Dark Eldar|racist slaveowners]] into knowing that [[Salamanders|blacks are Humans too]]) And, it ''has'' to be assumed, [[Conan the Barbarian]] ([[If The Emperor Had a Text-To-Speech Device|Yup, he used to be an asshole. A handsome, musclebound asshole.]] At least before he got wiser).

Sometime around the 11th or 12th century, He battled a shard of the [[Void Dragon]] in modern-day Libya. He eventually defeated it and locked it on [[Mars]], allowing the [[Adeptus Mechanicus]] to control machines... eventually. Of course, it's not entirely clear whether this is true or not -- it's entirely possible that ALL of the Emperor's history is a lazily-crafted lie He throws around because no one can debunk it. Although given how [[Awesome]] it sounds, we're going to say it is. Either that, or it's just another example of how [[Games Workshop|Geedubs]] can't be bothered to keep their stories consistent even about the most important parts of the setting.

Whatever his actual origins might have been, for the most part He more or less stayed out of the way of humanity's progress during the next 30,000 years of history, including the [[Dark Age of Technology]], though hot-off-the-press fluff indicates He might have been traversing outer space in old-style NASA rockets with the other Perpetuals, to eventually coming to find the planet [[Molech]], where He passed through a gateway that led ''directly'' to the fortresses of the four [[Chaos Gods]]. Here He either challenged, bargained, or stole portions of power from a source claimed by the gods as their own. This would earn Him the ire of the duped/defeated Ruinous Powers, who consider him as some sort of usurper or that he reneged on some kind of undisclosed deal we haven't been made aware of yet.

===Unification Wars===
He returned to Terra at the closing years of the [[Age of Strife]]. With Terra cut off from the rest of the Human empire and Terra itself ruled by warring "techno-barbarians", in a post-apocalyptic wasteland, E-money decided to reveal Himself, using His mastery of genetic engineering to create the [[Adeptus Custodes|Custodians]] and cheaper, easier to make [[Thunder Warriors]] ''(the predecessors of the Space Marines)''. Using "join-me-or-die" tactics, He managed to conquer the entirety of Terra during the event called Unification Wars. Then, He made contact with the Mechanicum of Mars and calling Himself the [[Omnissiah]], convinced them to build Him weapons and space-ships. Around this time, He also created a doctrine, the [[Imperial Truth]], which states that religion, faith, and superstition must be all banned, because they have never succeeded in unifying the human race during all of Emp's lifetime. Simply put: the whole "Peace, Love, and Religion" mumbo-jumbo has never worked and now must be eradicated (ignoring or forgetting what happened to [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Soviet_Union| real]-[https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pol_Pot| life] [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Religion_in_North_Korea| societies] that tried to throw faith and religion under the bus).

Exception where's He's not a perfect badass? [[The Last Church]]. It is permissible to substitute the voice of whatever angry militant atheist appeals to you most/least for the duration of this one (short) story. Also, according to that same story, this asshole wiped out Scandinavia, [[Viking|right when Scandinavia was getting fun again]]. According to the Horus Heresy books that mention the Unification Wars, He burned down a lot of things on a partially recovering Terra.

===Great Crusade===
But, before He set out to conquer the stars with the newly-formed Imperial Army (which contained both [[Imperial Guard|ground forces]] and [[Imperial Navy|space-borne fleets]]), He decided to create the twenty [[Primarch]]s, using Himself as the genetic template, while splitting the additional power He ''acquired'' from the Chaos Gods into 20 portions, infusing each piece with a fragment of His own personality, to allow them, in turn, to congeal and gestate (just like how daemons are born!) into the indomitable souls of His future Primarchs. Then, He bound each such vessel/soul to their godlike bodies/shells as they formed in their gestation capsules. Let this sink in: each primarch is basically a unique quasi-daemonic soul, bound to a super awesomely tough material body. Though with this power ''apparently'' stolen, The Big Four will inevitably and continually be pissed at Him for using their power for His own ends. So the Chaos Gods snatched the primarchs away (via time-travel-as-a-vision shenanigans, don't even try to explain it here, just read ''The First Heretic''), inside their incubator pods and all, from the secret lab underneath the Himalayas, to scatter them away across the galaxy. Luckily for the Emperor, some genetic samples were left over from each primarch, so from that He created 20 Legions to serve as the elites of His army: The [[Space Marine|SPEHSS MEHREENS]]. So, with His armies and space-ships complete (minus the Primarchs, which He hoped to find), He embarked upon the [[Great Crusade]], to restore mankind to its rightful place as rulers of the galaxy.

However, the Emperor himself states to Arkhan Land ''(the guy who discovered Land Speeders/Raiders)'' that he never considered the Primarchs to be his literal sons and saw them as well-crafted tools so he could get his work done. Likening himself to Geppetto ''(from 'Pinocchio')'' in that it is only natural for 20 wooden boys to think of their creator as "Father". Whether He felt any kinship between all of them or only some of them is not entirely known. But it seems like He was all like, "Yall think I'm a bad dad, but look, shit I just made these kids in a lab! I'm not really their dad!". Then again He puts on personas for every occasion (during the meeting, Land saw him as not as a gold armoured god, but as an utterly logical scientist and the Emperor had the whole shtick of people interpreting his words in the manner that made the most sense to them personally) who really knows when He's being genuine or not or how He feels.

On that note, Aaron Demski-Bowden has insisted that nothing the Emperor says in Master of Mankind should be taken at face value. Moreover, the Emperor is consistent in how He describes the Primarchs. While He uses numbers and "it" when talking to Ra and Land, at the end of a book He's referring to Horus by name and as a "he", not an "it". AD-B has doggedly refused to clarify, because he enjoys watching the arguments he's kicked off.

As He found each Primarch, He assigned them command of their respective Legions and to act as His generals, warlords and pantheon of heroes that humanity were meant to emulate, in the quest to unify humanity in the Great Crusade ''(although, at some point, one of them was executed and the other disappeared, leaving only 18 Primarchs and Legions after 100 years of the Great Crusade).''

A military campaign of a grand scale, this is also when the SPESS MEHREENS were most awesome and at their peak. [[just as planned|Just when things seemed to be going well]], the [[Horus Heresy]] took place, where 8.5 of the Primarchs and their respective legions rebel against the Emprah. In the end, the Emperor fought and slew [[Horus]] (who was daddy's favourite) but at a great cost. The Emperor was mortally wounded to the point that He had to be put permanently on a life support system known as the [[Golden Throne]]. On that day, an untold amount of manly tears was shed.

==="Modern" Day===
Subsequently, 10 thousand years later, without the Emperor's leadership, the Imperium eventually degraded into the theocratic, [[grimdark]] empire we all know and love today, in the 41st millennium. In the 500th year of the 41st Millennium (the exact middle of the millennium), which is a few centuries before the Time of Ending began, visions and signs reach out to all walks of life and social status to the Imperium of the Emperor crying, whether it's to lowly denizens of an underhive having dreams about it, to respected sanctioned psykers reading it from the Imperial Tarot, to shamans on feral planets instinctively knowing that the extra rain pouring down lately are tears of sadness from their "sky god".

While interred on the Golden Throne, the Emperor's psychic-essence prevents [[daemon|daemon kind]] from directly assailing [[Terra]], while additionally sustaining the psychic-beacon known as the [[Astronomican]], that makes warp travel within 50,000 light years around Terra possible.

A question remained unanswered is that, is the above thing the only thing he is capable of doing these days? Or can he communicate with others? It was said that the newly revived Guilliman had an audience with him for a whole day, so presumably he can. But then, what is he [[Black_Crusade| waiting for]] [[Emperor%27s_To-Do_List| before]] waking the [[Lion_El%27Jonson| sleepy beauty ]] up?

It is common knowledge, that the Emperor is the most powerful psyker alive, humbling even the [[Eldar]]. It is also suggested that He has guided humanity in a guise of people like Julius Caesar, [[Conan the Barbarian]], [[meme|Chuck Norris]], Christopher Lee and Jesus. It is uncertain as to whether or not His internment on the Golden Throne is a good thing. Some believe that if He were to die, the [[Imperium]] would truly fall into darkness, whereas others believe that if allowed to finally die, He would reincarnate and return to unify the galaxy once more, stronger than ever. Whatever the truth, [[Games Workshop]] are probably never going to advance the story, so speculation has little worth. Unless you take Warhammer Fantasy as an example, where the time-line ended. Badly.

As the Golden Throne is breaking apart, the Mechanicus and certain elements at the top of the Imperium tries to contact the Dark Eldar for knowledge on how to repair the thing. ''The Carrion Throne'' reveals that a [[Haemonculus]] did make it to Terra, he is hunted down by the Inquisitor and the Custodes. So yeah, a secret war is possibly about to happen for disagreement over how to save him.

==The Emprah Himself==
[[File:Climax.jpg|250px|right|thumb|A typical father-and-son chat between Empy and Horus.]]
:''"The Emperor was a brilliant scientist, a powerful warrior, and great psyker, but he was a terrible [[Venus' Burn|father...]]"
:- [[Roboute Guilliman]], giving a short, yet accurate biography of the Emperor. Though on the other hand, he would learn that the Emperor never saw himself as their father.

After He shaved his goatee, His chin radiated [[Astronomican|a brilliant light]] through the [[Warp]]. The [[Imperial Navy]] uses this light as a beacon to guide them through that beautifully terrible place. He is sometimes referred to as the Emprah, a joke derived from the voice acting in the ''[[Dawn of War]]'' game, ''[[Dawn of War: Soulstorm|Soulstorm]]'', specifically [[Indrick Boreale]]'s final speeches.

The Emperor is said to be so powerful that He could [[C'tan|destroy suns with ease]], though He has never actually done so (he however, ''made'' a golden sun which he put in the middle of his broken [[Webway]] gate to prevent daemons from spilling through, albeit needing to concentrate on powering it for the next ten thousand years. This would indicate that the Emperor does indeed have the power to destroy stars.). The [[Chaos Gods]] are scared as fuck of the guy, calling him respectively "The Anathema", as in the polar opposite to [[Chaos]]. The [[Eldar]] fear that if the Emperor were to die, a new [[Eye of Terror]] would pop out with Terra at its center and possibly a new Chaos God would be born.

He was also capable of summoning what can only be called an army of human souls (including every soldier who had died for him, Ferrus Manus included) to fight for him; an ability utterly unseen in the 40k universe and suggesting that he has some fundamental connection to human souls in the afterlife - a comforting thought compared to dissolving into the Warp to be eaten by daemons and giving some credence to the 40k era theory that when the Time of Ending...ends..the Emperor and all loyal human souls will join in one final battle against Chaos.

After He was nearly killed by His son, He was placed upon the Golden Throne and hasn't moved for the past 10 millennia. Most of the fluff maintains that His existence on a day-to-day basis since then is a living hell (by comparison, the torture astropaths go through when becoming one, would be like a trip to the dentist). It's the mother/father/uncle/2nd Cousin of all mindfucks, so bad that even an Inquisitor would likely go insane as a result (or anybody else for that matter) and yet He carries on. Why? He may be the universe's most powerful vegetable, but that doesn't mean that He will just take a sit and die. Oh no, it's exactly the opposite. It gives Him a fuckton of work to do, and along with being THE lighthouse in the Warp, guiding the Imperial Navy, He also needs to make the aforementioned astropaths, as well as keeping all the [[daemon|nasties]] of the Warp where they're supposed to be (i.e. not invading realspace to make the lives of all living things miserable). He also does it for the good of humanity (sounds kinda familiar, doesn't it?). In the last year of M41, tech-priests discovered that the Golden Throne is failing and the Emperor is dying. There is a chance of the Emperor returning to life, as well as the risk that He will die forever. If the latter would be the case, then everyone in the galaxy will become a Chaos sex toy/punching bag/plague vector/science experiment. Note that if the Emperor recovers, He'd be several hundred times more powerful. Emps was born of a group of psykers combining their might and souls in one ritual act. Maybe. Since then, Empy has probably gained about 365 gigafucktrillion souls (or about half the worlds' current pop.) since he got put on that Throne (see: leveling in Dark Souls), as he ''is'' the afterlife now, provided one excludes the veritable Hell that is the Warp. And all that stuff the Eldar get up to.

:''"He's been up to all sorts of things, our beloved father. Consorting with Xenos, resurrecting ancient technology. Don't believe that he is blameless in this...''
:- Magnus the Red

His desire to guide and protect humanity, in addition to His power, made the Emperor as close to a farseer as humanity was ever going to get. He declared humanity to be superior to all Xenos which was fair enough considering the collapse of the Eldar, planned to destroy every shard of religion by force of arms if needed in order to protect them from the whispers of Chaos (though he got the whole thing backwards, since said religions were starving the Chaos gods), planned to reunite humanity under His rule no matter what anyone else wanted/thought of that (again by force of arms if needed), cared little for the Primarchs being His actual sons (thinking of them as generals and tools rather than biological offspring, and screwing over several of them in His efforts to recruit them / making them follow orders (hence causing some of their later betrayals)), carried out many unorthodox, morally questionable experiments and much much more... All because this was the only way He could foresee humanity surviving the threats to come. Also known as the "Golden Path". Any other action He ever partook in, no matter how unorthodox or morally questionable or just outright horrific was secondary to the one and only goal: survival. For a being that's lived millennia, having foreseen as much as is possible to do so whilst not being an actual god, His way was the only way lest we all face extinction. Those were the options with the context of the universe He found Himself in. Time was against Him, and expediency was the order of the day; secure the physical safety of Mankind in the galaxy then safeguard their minds and souls. Everything else was a tool to be utilized in pursuit of that single purpose. It didn't matter how the godlike princelings felt, or how they were raised; it only mattered that they performed their allocated tasks as swiftly and efficiently as possible so that He could move on to the next phase of His Great Work.

His reign eventually [[Inquisition|killed more humans]] (not even counting those who were innocent) than the entire total of all of humanity's dictators in history (ironically that may have been past personas of the Emperor). Even during the Unification Wars, several Terran cultures were wiped out completely (Orioc on Antarctica, for example, was razed to the ground for being religious, just to make a point, even after its forces were defeated and its people ready to surrender), while simultaneously being pretty terrible at incorporating non-Terran elements. Because THAT is just how damn important and dire the circumstances were. An entire galaxy spanning empire needed to be constructed in little under two centuries when the cataclysm was foreseen to occur and ain't no one got time to fart arse about with treating people the way they deserve if the species won't survive.

Contrary to popular belief, he really did think the post-Ullanor phase through to some degree, Horus was the right choice as Warmaster for no other could command the respect of nearly all his brother better than Lupercal the First. And Dorn as Praetorian was as correct a decision as was possible to make considering that his talents were put to good use throughout the Heresy that followed. There was no need to put a Primarch in charge of the Council of Terra for the Primarchs were not made to rule, but to serve as generals in retaking the galaxy. Humanity was to be governed by humanity. Primarchs like say, Guilliman, though perfect as an administrator, was better suited and needed as a general for the Great Crusade. Honestly, it's bewildering that no one in the military saw the need for human administration. Having godlike Primarchs in charge at the top only serves to increase superstition in a secular galaxy when the idea was to rid humanity of religion and superstition in order to better protect it from warp predation.

To be fair, the whole reason humanity (and the Emperor) hates aliens is because during the Age of Strife numerous Xenos races exploited humanity's trust and either raided, lollygagged, looted or all of the above and were generally a nuisance the entire time. Then the Emperor comes along and decides that the best way to stop all that from happening again is to wipe out all Xenos that might even think to pose a threat to the fledgling Imperium. However, those few Xenos species that did not pose an immediate threat to humanity were usually made protectorates similar to the Tau government (unless they resisted, were in the way, possessed a planet, influenced human culture at all, or were intelligent at all, in which case [[Exterminatus|the results]] were predictable). Ever since His ascension, the Imperium forgot about the part where harmless aliens could be tolerated. But on the other hand, [[Orks|the]] [[Necron|most]] [[Tyranids|common]] [[Tau|xenos]] [[Dark Eldar|are]] [[Asdrubael Vect|massive]] [[Eldrad|dicks]] and aren't exactly willing to buddy up with the Imperium themselves. Plus, at least according to ''Horus Rising'', the idea of letting Xenos exist and then eventually grow stronger is wrong on every level to the Imperium (hence the whole mess with the [[Interex|Interex/Diasporex]].

To be even more fair (and meta), the triumvirate of Horus Heresy authors tend to have their own interpretation of the Big E. Graham McNeill generally portrays Him as competent and benevolent (if flawed), Dan Abnett portrays Him as competent but bloodthirsty, while Aaron Dembski-Bowden portrays Him as a vicious, needlessly cruel imbecile (and even this is counterbalanced by his portrayal in Master of Mankind, where he's interestingly a mixture of all the previous portrayals at once - which is kinda of appropriate really). Chris Wraight, as far as he has portrayed Him, has done so through the eyes of Jaghatai Khan, showing Him as deeply flawed and distant from His own sons, but also countering that He was working towards goals even the Primarchs couldn't fully grasp. Even in Path of Heaven, where the Khan gets close to learning the secrets of the Webway project, he's shown to not have all the cards (the Emperor's knowledge that humanity is evolving into a psychic race, for example).

On another note, [[Warhammer 40,000: Rogue Trader|long before the Horus Heresy novel series]], there were hidden gems [[Spiritual liege|Noobs]] are not aware of, such as a text describing the fight between Horus and the Emperor (although it wasn't written especially well), or Conspiracy Theories. One of them was actually the possibility that the Emperor was already dead when Rogal Dorn managed to reach him; however, in the aforementioned text, [[Luther|Horus had realised that he had been wronged and deceived]] by the [[Assholetep|Chaos Gods]], who immediately ceased to possessed the Warmaster and fled before the Emperor's final Force attack [[FATAL|bring woe to both of them]]. What if the Emperor had spared him or if the Warmaster survived somehow ? In Olden Fluff, all Primarchs were Psykers and originally supposed to be [[Grey Knight|shining examplars of Human free from the taint of the Empyrean]] which they failed to bare true potential due to their early contact with the Warp, via the Dark Gods abducting them pedobear style.

This in turn was what caused their mutations and unique characteristics and diversity which was more of a metaphor that each Primarch was an image of humanity themselves; in fact, much of the powers of the Primarchs, like the Emperor, would have come from their psychic abilities. It is known that [[Sensei]]'s powers include health, regeneration, greater athletic prowess and [[God Stat|overpowering their Strength stat]] when they try to attack something, thus it would not be surprising if it was also the case for Primarchs (baby Sanguinius was super healthy and immune to Baal's radiations, Curze crawled out of his molten drop-pod and crater while screaming in pain and fled immediately, instinctively, into the darkness, and later his body was fully healed) prior to the new fluff messing everything up, 'cause BL writers have trouble getting their shit together.

But back to where we are; the notion that the Emperor is dead forebodes a terrible possibility, in which [[Pretend|the corpse that Rogal Dorn took back on Terra's Imperial Palace was not Big E but of Horus being passed as the Emperor... and was worshipped as such for Ten Thousand Years]]. While [[Retcon|this has become highly unlikely]], it would both be a great and GRIMDARK [[Just As Planned|plot twist]] and an immense source of [[Lulz]] especially when you mix in the events of Gathering Storm 3 with [[Roboute Guilliman]]. While this would explain why some Fluff versions mentions that no one save for the Adeptus Custodes' Companions have entered the Throne Room, and keep maximum security all the time (to be fair, other sources mentioned exceptions everywhere, such as the psykers being needed as sacrifice for the Golden Throne, Grey Knights companies granted audience or certain high ranked Inquisitors such as their [[Badasious|High Lord]] and [[Hector Rex]]), this theory has since been disproven.

The truth is outright revealed in Dark Imperium - the first novel set after the Gathering Storm. Roboute Guilliman reflects upon his meeting with the Emperor, saying that he entered the Throne Room expecting to find the Emperor dead. The Emperor was a wizened corpse surrounded by banks of groaning machinery... '''but the Emperor was still alive and talked to him'''. Guilliman feels that the Emperor's psychic might has grown since his death, but that his humanity has gone as well, to the point that Guilliman thinks that even if he is a god he doesn't deserve to be worshiped. Nonetheless, in some impossible fashion, something of the Emperor has survived to M42.

===His Goals and Flaws===
*Lead and shape Mankind into a psychic race and surpass the Eldar by learning from their mistakes.
*Unite Humanity under one aegis and allow for instant communication and travel across all human inhabited worlds, thereby uniting the species in a way that it had never been before.
*Most importantly, prevent another calamity like the [[Age of Strife]] or [[Fall of the Eldar]].

In order to achieve this He had to:
*Reclaim every single human inhabited world, spacecraft or station;
*Purge all humans that had deviated from the normal strain of humanity (because they would not evolve into the predicted psychic species and threatened the Plan with their deviancy);
*Remove alien influence or control from human worlds;
*Eliminate external Xenos threats throughout the galaxy that might challenge or become a threat to Mankind's supremacy.
*Shelter and protect Humanity from the fell hand of [[Chaos]].

To achieve those secondary goals He had to:
*Create [[Primarchs|superhuman generals]] to bestride the galaxy and lead men to innumerable victories;
*Create [[Space Marines|superhuman soldiers]] powerful enough to retake the galaxy beneath the banners of said generals from any enemy;
*Remove the influence of religion from the collective psyche of the human species in order to protect them from the insidious whispers of Chaos (often mistaken for something supernatural and hence a gateway to disaster).

So in the pursuit of those tertiary goals, the Emperor undertook the Great Crusade. Once it was over, all the Primarchs were to have their place: Lorgar was to be the Emperor's Herald and shelter mankind from superstition through enlightenment so that if ever they heard whispers in the dark; they knew it was not natural and to be feared by it, thus denying its embrace. Magnus was to assist the Emperor in sitting on the Golden Throne of earth, thus powering the human Webway (somehow), becoming a key figure in Humanity's ascension. Horus was to protect Mankind from [[Tyranids|external]] [[Necrons|physical]] [[Orks|threats]] throughout the Galaxy as Humanity's general. Konrad was to be the enforcer of the Emperor's Laws. Mortarion, His watchguard of wayward deviancy etc.

But the Imperium was only one half of the Plan. The other was the Webway, allowing nigh-instantaneous travel and communication, limiting Mankind's reliance on the warp to almost nothing in the form of Warp travel and thus protecting them against the influence of Chaos. Therefore allowing Mankind to evolve in relative safety and security under the direct guidance and control of the Emperor. When Mankind would be ready, we'd be protected from the warp naturally. That was the final crowning achievement that would bring all the Emperor's plans to fruition and pull all the wayward goals into one singular perfect Great Work. All the sacrifice, all the death, all the heartache, the glory, the battles, the trials and tribulation, 48,000 years of history was culminating into that one Plan. And it all would've been worth it because Mankind would've been saved for all time. Worth any price, where the ends justified the means, or so he claimed.

And yet at the same time, it was this very same pragmatism that ultimately led to his downfall:

*Though his pragmatism made him a superb ruler in wartime, the ultra-militarized society He had [[First Founding|created]] was entirely dependent on the Imperium being constantly at war. Even if the Great Crusade had proceeded exactly as the Emperor expected, it still would have run out of enemies eventually. And when you have a few trillion newly unemployed soldiers with no other skills beyond killing on your hands and no other purpose in life beyond said killing...well, they tend to get rowdy. He should have realized this already when he had to mop up the surviving [[Thunder Warriors]]. It remains unknown how the Imperium would have continued to look after the Great Crusade was completed and how the large military would be scaled down- or if such a feat could even be possible with a civilization he designed to work only in the presence of a steady stream of conquests. Sure, some of the primarchs and legions had other skills like Guilliman's political organization, but the rank-and-file? Or the likes of the [[World Eaters]]?
*The Emperor's concern for humanity as a whole belied his refusal to acknowledge that humanity was not just a species, but also a group of individuals with infinite variety and whose goals did not necessarily support His own. The fact that other human civilizations such as the Interex had already found ways to fight against Chaos on their own and were just as advanced as the Imperium (if not more so) meant nothing to him (or at least, to his Plan). In his mind, he alone knew what was good for humanity and anything short of total submission to the Imperium was grounds for destruction even (or ''especially'') if they were doing a better job than he was. In effect, all his efforts were performed in the name of an abstraction that arguably '''never existed in the first place'''.
*He made a critical mistake in that trying to erase religion without replacing it with secular ideals that had the same degree of universal appeal. Lacking the immortality and inhumanly grand perspective of the Emperor, it's a basic part of human nature to look for meaning and purpose in a cause greater than oneself, especially in the harsh and grimdark universe that was the [[Age of Strife|Old Night]]. The Imperial Truth tried to do this, but it didn't take into account that "reason", "logic", and "humanism" were by definition too mundane to be suited for the replacement of the old religions, as they were poor substitutes for finding individual meaning. The fact that the Imperial Cult took off so quickly after the Emperor's internment on the Golden Throne (and is arguably the only thing keeping the Imperium a remotely unified entity in the present) is proof that the Emperor was once again either too stubborn for his own good or too divorced from the "normal" human condition to understand the value of belief. In either case, all it accomplished was giving all four of the Ruinous Powers a reason to get rid of him, while also giving them an invaluable tool to do so in the form of Lorgar. And all while he was telling the Primarchs that daemons were just another Xenos race in an ill-advised attempt to dispense with their mythological appearance and obvious possession of supernatural powers. This attempt left them vulnerable for Chaotic corruption among themselves or their Legions. Yes, He gave them incredibly vague warnings, but those were not even close to the amount of information He needed to give them. Or, for those of us who think this sounds just a little bit religious for our tastes and don't want to get into a philosophical debate over the importance of belief, imagine the trillions of citizens who had gone their whole lives worshipping a belief only to have ol' Emps turn up and just say "No".
*For a guy who says he's trying to avoid the same mistakes the Eldar made, his obsession with human supremacy and the supposed "purity" of the human form (as defined by what, his own opinion?) are almost indistinguishable from the pre-Fall Eldar's certainty that they were the rightful rulers of the galaxy. Even if humanity did become a purely psychic race, nothing would stop it from making ''another'' Chaos God by accident. It's not a stretch to hypothesize that this was itself a ploy for him to use the collective psychic power of humanity to elevate himself to the status of godhood, where he could truly rule with infinite power.
**The only beings who knew how to create new parts of the Webway were the [[Old Ones]], and they're all dead. At best, the Webway project would've delayed the inevitable before the fact that nobody can figure out how to keep it working became obvious. And since the Warp already bleeds into the Webway at the best of times...well, the whole thing would've been rendered pointless if or when the Warp completely breaks through into the Webway.
**The so-called mistakes and subsequent "Fall" of the Eldar [[Lileath|may have been foreseen]] and [[Morai-Heg|apparently planned for]]. By the close of the 41st Millennium, the psychic gestalt of the conscious-dead Eldar have formed the new god [[Ynnead]], quite probably proving that willpower eventually counters [[Slaanesh|desire]] and completing the Eldar's psychic ascension as a species. The Emperor may not have been aware of this and humanity's own psychic awakening may not have been as tragic, but to give him credit, his own endgame is somewhat similar in wanting to nurture mankind's psychic ascension but without the catastrophe. He is possibly positioning himself to become the focus for humanity's willpower rather than needing enough souls to die before they gestalt together, becoming a guiding will rather than a collective one.
*Most damningly of all, his total disregard for the possibility that the Primarchs might actually have their own thoughts and feelings ended up being one of the key reasons why so many of the Legions ended up falling to Chaos in the first place:
**Lorgar's case (and the entirety of the Horus Heresy, at that matter) would have been entirely avoidable if the Emperor acted like a genuine father figure for once in his lifetime and explained to Lorgar why his Emperor worship had to stop (which the Emperor, with all his undeniable charisma could have achieved). Instead, he had to act like a total dick and utterly humiliate his son by having his grandest city utterly ransacked and ruined, all to prove a point (and just to be an even bigger dick; he had one of Lorgar's own [[Roboute Guilliman|brothers]] do his dirty work.). Yes the point was VERY important to make to Lorgar, but when you say "THIS WORSHIP WILL DESTROY US" without actually going into depth how bad shit can actually get, you leave a fanatic with an excuse to continue being a fanatic and a very good reason to hate you on a personal level.
**Angron's case is self-explanatory; honestly, if it weren't for Emps sending him into battle so often he would have rebelled sooner. Sure, he couldn't just let one of his Primarchs get himself killed in a slave revolt, but you'd think he'd send down some of the War Hounds or something instead of warping him away and earning Angron's undying hatred. Why a <s>man</s> <s>superman</s> Primarch (god damn it!) who knew only killing (not even war, just murdering people) should be controlling 100,000+ Space Marines is something only the Emperor and his divine ass can fathom.
**[[Fulgrim]]'s road to damnation started because he decided to loot a Slaaneshi-possesed sword. Knowing nothing about Chaos, Fulgrim had no idea he was using an incredibly dangerous warp artifact that that would lead to untold consequences. It didn't help that his strict xenophobic teachings prevented Fulgrim from taking [[Eldrad]]'s advice about the Laer Blade into account.
**Even with the Webway fuck-up (which itself could have been prevented had the Emperor not kept it a secret from the most important people in his plans) Magnus might have remained a loyalist if the Emperor had brought Magnus to the Great Work earlier, or had him stationed on Terra along with Dorn, or even just listened to his warning that Horus had turned traitor. Instead, he totally disregarded Magnus's entirely correct warning in favor of allowing Russ (the one Primarch who most wanted Magnus dead) to arrest him because he didn't like the way said warning was delivered. And with the door already broken, he could have simply psy-phoned Magnus to clear it all up instead of jumping to conclusions.
**Similarly to Angron, [[Mortarion]] always resented the Emperor for not letting him get to kill his adoptive father, and when the Emperor refused to give him an answer about the obvious piece of Warp-tech that was the Golden Throne he concluded that the Emperor was a hypocrite and the Imperial Truth was bullshit.
**The Emperor, being the wisest and most powerful human psyker in the galaxy of all people, should have been able to see that [[Konrad Curze]] was an unstable psyker who was on the fast road to devolving into insanity due to his uncontrolled talents. And if he already was aware of it, then at best he was being incredibly careless. And what with the whole Night Lords comprise of criminals, one must really question his divine quality control. Or maybe he is just totally rely on his <s>large</s> huge brain capacity to manage things, and simply dismiss things that can't fit in.
**Completely ignoring that [[Perturabo]] needlessly had one in ten men in his legion killed by decimation under flimsy pretenses. Coupled with the fact that Perturabo was originally a peaceful, diplomatic soul; these two should have triggered some alarm bells about his mental stability. While it was said that the Emperor considers the Primarchs more of tools and less of his children, in retrospect it was obvious that there was plenty of [[Rogal Dorn|favoritism]] going on.
**Horus himself was only pushed to fall because the Chaos Gods played on his worries that he wasn't fit to be Warmaster combined with the unrealized, greater fear that the Emperor never cared for him as a person and that he, the other Primarchs, and the Astartes as a whole would have no place in the Imperium after the Great Crusade's conclusion. (Horus likely being aware of what happened to the [[Thunder Warriors]] when they outlived their usefulness at the end of the Unification Wars probably stoked that particular fire nicely.) You'd have thought the Emperor's most beloved 'son' would at least have been shown the special rooms in the Imperial Palace the Emperor made specifically for the Primarchs to live in after the Great Crusade ended, or at least discussed what he had planned for them when they weren't needed as generals any longer, but no.
**Perhaps the biggest kicker to this is that if we're going to take all of Black Library into account, the Emperor never truly cared for the Primarchs at all (loyalist and traitor included), viewing them as nothing more than powerful but ultimately expendable tools to further the ambitions of Humanity's survival and ascendancy. As determined by the Emperor, of course.
***Although one can always argue that the remaining Primarchs stayed loyal either because they believed in his vision for humanity or were too loyal to be turned, there's no telling exactly how long that might have gone on after the Great Crusade's end - some of them showed signs of disloyalty to the Emperor even during the Heresy, only staying on his side either out of loyalty to Mankind as a whole (Guilliman and his [[Imperium Secundus]] come to mind here), by recognizing the other side as an even greater evil (like Jagatai), or only because the Imperium is on the winning side (if Curze's trolling was true; The Lion, which probably isn't true considering he stabbed him in the next paragraph and told Curze that he didn't care and that he was balls-to-the-wall loyal).
***To clarify the above point, after Guilliman's meeting with the Emperor following the Primarch's revival, he noted that while he loved humanity as a whole, the Emperor was practically incapable of caring about individual people, even his own Primarchs. Everything and everyone was just a tool to him. While some might interpret this as the Emperor simply being a dick, you have to understand his situation; he's an immortal superhuman with a plan to uplift humanity. The fact he's immortal means he would be unable to form any meaningful relationships with mortals, because he'll always outlast them in one way or another. His plan also involved tons of sacrifices for the greater good, when you're forced to sacrifice anything to continue your plans; you can't afford to be too attached to someone you might have to throw into the fire in a split second. The Emprah is cursed to always looking forward to the endless road of the future, he can never live in nor understand the concept of the present. As a result his plans failed to account for the fact others might not just meekly go along with his plans without question and became further detached from the real human condition.
*Overall, and quite ironically, the main reason why the Emperor's plan was doomed to fail in time was because while the Emperor understood the path on what humanity must take for a brighter future, he himself was either unable or unwilling to understand humanity. Instead, he chose to remain distant from them and act like he was above their understanding, and that they should just simply follow him because he's the Emperor and he alone knows what's best for humanity, because shut up or be on the receiving end of a boltgun. (Even more ironically, this was how the majority of the gods that humanity originally believed in acted as well, and at least they had the excuse that they really were divine. For all his efforts to remove religion, the Emperor played the part of a god hilariously well.). Lastly maybe the Emperor understood that his Primarchs were unstable and unreliable. Given the issues with the Thunder Warrior's he had to know all of this was coming eventually just from past experience. But it's possible he just didn't expect it to be in the form of a team death match. He could see Kurze being unstable enough eventually that he and his Legion would need to be removed but expected it to be individual Legions and Primarchs that would need censure but couldn't foresee his own flaws causing enough gulfs with each of his Primarchs that they would have a reason to band together. If that was the case he was a poor father and a poor leader not to see his own arrogance as a flaw in his design.

On another note, the fact his ossified self has managed to shed tears and there was an incident where everyone across the Imperium saw statues of the Emperor weeping tears of blood due the incoming disasters of the End Times may mean that he has finally started to realize how horribly he fucked up on every possible level. Or maybe it's hurting even more than ever to stay sit at the Golden Throne.

The latter is far more likely; according to Roboute Guilliman, when he met with the Emperor after his revival, He treated Guilliman as a mere tool without showing even the faintest display of affection or care for him as a person. One can only assume that 10,000 years on the Golden Throne has done absolutely nothing to make the Emperor be less of an asshole; in fact, he's described as being human in name alone, and Guilliman believes that even if he is a god he doesn't deserve to be worshipped.

===But what does all that mean for The Duel?===
Yeah...about that. Regarding the Emperor's duel with Horus, we're all reasonably sure we know the old story. The Emperor faces down Horus, and had the power to roflstomp him, but his love for his favourite son prevented him from going all out, which leads to Emps getting his ass kicked. It takes an extraordinarily callous killing by Horus to finally convince the Emperor that Horus is beyond saving, and Emps blasts him full power to put an end to the Horus Heresy. The rising problem here is that this version of events heavily relies on the Emperor's compassion (particularly towards his sons), compassion that the Horus Heresy books and Dark Imperium assert that he ''never had, either then or in the 41st millennium''. The Emperor for example put down his Thunder Warriors as soon as they stopped being useful, or safe for work, he did not even pretend to caring about Angron and his Butchers nails, asserting that he would keep him as long as he had a use for him, and so on. Without that, the scene in its current form simply does not work. After all Horus had done in the years before, in a room with the maimed corpse of Sanguinius, a loyal and beloved (as far as it goes with Big E, at last) son of his, there is really no way he would have gone all fatherly love on Horus and not just blasted him, or at least tried to. (Maybe the current form is Imperial propaganda trying to conceal the fact that Horus simply kicked his shiny golden ass for some reason?) So what the hell will happen? A very good question, at this point. [[Laurie Goulding]] has implied that when the Heresy books finally get to it, the final duel may play out ''very'' differently from how we think we know it. It certainly wouldn't be the first time it's been retconned.

Perhaps, or perhaps not, to have hesitated out of love for a son, the final weakness during the last test to save mankind, that would have shown why the Emperor couldn't afford to love anyone, not even his own sons, so yeah, perhaps now, finally, we have the complete picture of the Master of Mankind.

tl;dr He was a horribly flawed but well intended asshole with a "The needs of the many" outlook on life meaning he couldn't afford to show love or compassion to anything but mankind as a whole, not even his "sons."

== ADB on the Emperor in Master of Mankind ==
In response to criticisms on his portrayal of the Emperor, ADB posted this:

''That's true, and I definitely wanted to bring out a better understanding of his vision and what he was up against, but that's also lore I'd wager anyone with a deep knowledge of the setting already had a handle on to some degree, whether explicitly or not. What I wanted to avoid was too much "new" stuff. You have to put in something new, and thankfully what little newness I do introduce in my work is seemingly well-regarded, but I've always said our job (as I see it) is to illustrate the setting and show what it's like to live there, not to set it in stone. As much as the fandom adores "advancing the storyline", it's not something that interests me, by and large. I try my best to show things from the perspectives of characters on the ground level, bring a few perceptions of the setting through the lens of my own imagination and the insight I'm lucky enough to get endlessly talking about the setting with its creators and inheritors, and then get out. Most of my books are, to some extent, not definitive. They're about Some Guy, not the entire faction.

''Grimaldus in Helsreach has no bond to the wider war on Armageddon and hates that he's been left behind by the Black Templars, but he's (hopefully) a good example of what it feels like to be a Black Templar, and to think like one, and - crucially - what it feels like to be a human around them. Talos and the other characters of First Claw spend a trilogy unable to decide what the Night Lords Legion really was, and each of them remembers their glory days differently. I didn't want to speak for the whole Legion. Hyperion in The Emperor's Gift is a largely generic Grey Knight present in dire circumstances. HH-wise, I didn't want to show all of the Word Bearers and base a book around the expectations of Kor Phaeron, Lorgar, and Erebus, so I focused on the Serrated Sun in the middle of the changes taking place across the galaxy. Savage Weapons is largely about Corswain, not about Curze and the Lion. The Master of Mankind is about Ra, Zephon, Jaya, and Land in the heart of the Emperor's plans for the species, not about the Emperor himself. As much as I wrote about Angron and Lorgar, they get significantly less in-their-heads screen time than most other primarchs in most other books.''

''It's harder to do that with the Heresy, but - again - I do my best to present individual experiences and mindsets in characters like Khârn, Argel Tal, and Ra, rather than definitive looks at the entire Chapter/Legion/faction and setting its events in stone. I try to present a feel for how it is to live inside that culture and be part of the experiences they go through; it's about immersion into the Chapter or Legion, presenting them as believable and real, not definitively saying "All of Chapter X are like Y."
''
''So: I'm reluctant to talk about TMoM and the Emperor's perception in that book in any real detail, partly because the book is still new and there's a lot individual readers would do better discovering for themselves without my thoughts in public, and partly because everything I'd say is ultimately in the book. Anything I say will be taken out of context or weaponised one way or another somewhere, and used in a way that makes me sigh, cringe, or a dramatic melange of both that shall hereafter be called the sigh-cringe.
''
''(Plus, most of all, I have faith in readers. They don't need me defining anything, even if it might be interesting for a few peeps.)''

''So, I'll just say this. The Master of Mankind is entirely from the perspectives of people that meet the Emperor in pretty specific circumstances. There are, obviously, other circumstances to come. Nothing in it is definitive, even less so than my usual work. Any definitive statement you can make about how the Emperor sees something or does something is almost always contradicted in the book itself. That's not an escape clause or an excuse. It's the point. Writing him definitively would've been the easiest and most disappointing thing in the world.
''
''(And on that note, remember, everyone views 40K differently. What Person X is absolutely certain is the truth of the Emperor and the best way to present him would be laughed off by Persons A, B, and C. The flip side to that is that not every perspective is founded in fact or understanding. The earliest "I've not read this yet, but..." criticisms and misunderstandings of TMoM in, ah, certain reddit/chan-style locations was regarded by GW IP folks as, I quote: "These angry people seem to be beholden to a version of 40K that has never existed...")
''
''But in all seriousness, I don't want to delve too deeply into explaining the ways the Emperor's contradictions matter or don't matter. They're there, and they're definitely formative - totally agree - if not exactly definitive. With the Emperor, a lot of interaction is about getting out what you put in. You get what you give. Your perceptions and expectations are reflected back on you because that's how the human brain perceives everything (a fact that cannot be overstated; the science behind it is fascinating and all-important), especially when you're talking about someone who exists on that plane of power. At one point the Emperor makes mention of the notion that he's not even speaking, that being near to him allows the conveyance of meaning through psychic osmosis, and communication telepathically. He's not even talking. It's raw understanding filtering through a mind, or just the way the mortal mind comprehends the aura of what the Emperor intends, or, or, or...
''
''That's what I mean. TMoM is littered with that stuff. Does he only address the primarchs by number instead of name? Some characters will swear he does that, and doesn't that just perfectly match their perspectives of the primarchs as either emotionally-compromised "too-human" things that think they're sons (Ra), or genetic masterworks that have become galaxy-damning screw-ups that have literally let the galaxy burn and brought the Imperium to its knees, leading people to be exiled from their homeworlds (Land). Do you think Sanguinius will agree? Or care that's what mortals think? The Emperor's portrayal on that isn't even consistent between Ra and Diocletian, two of his Custodians - and on PAGE ONE, the only time he interacts with a primarch himself, and the one and only thing he says to Magnus the Red is...?
''
"''Magnus''."

''Like... that's a pretty strong indication that the interactions which follow are playing by different rules. Ra sees the Warlord of Humanity, just a man, but a great mean, weary and defiant, burdened by responsibility. Daemons see their annihilation, and go insane in his presence. One of the Knights, as they're marching through the Throne Room, is caught in religious rapture, unable to do anything but stare at the glorious halo of the Emperor of Mankind on the Golden Throne. One of the Sisters of Silence, in the same room, literally just sees a man in a chair. Another character, not Imperial, asks a Custodian if the Emperor even breathes. She believes he's a weapon left out of its box from the Dark Age of Technology. (With thanks to Alan Bligh for that one, he adores that theory.)
''
''So I don't think it's exactly a spoiler to say that if and when I get to write a character like Sanguinius in the Emperor's presence, or Malcador, they'd have entirely different experiences than Ra and Land. I'd loved to have had that in TMoM, but as much as it would've given wider context, these aren't rulebooks and essays; it would've been self-indulgent for the sake of 'hoping people get it', and cheapened the story being told, which was ultimately in a very narrow and confined set of circumstances. Breaking out of that narrative would be offering a sense of scope and freedom I was specifically trying to avoid in a claustrophobic siege story. Because theme and atmosphere is a thing.''
''

tl;dr: Everyone whom speaks to the Emperor hears something different so nothing he says should be taken at face value.

==Worship of the Emperor==
[[File:646545.jpg|thumb|300px|What the Emperor looked like before Horus decided to [[Rip and tear|bitchslap]] Him so hard he ended up spending the next 10,000 years on the Golden Throne as a rotting corpse. Notice the giant skull. How did that skull get so big? Is it a plastic faux-skull, or is it an mutant or even an alien skull? <s>(What He doesn't want you to know is that The E is actually a midget, the armor is a mech and that that's a regular-sized skull)</s> [[BLAM| '''*BLAM!*''']] Anyway, back to the topic at hand. You don't get to see the Emperor out of armor very often. But he still looks ''fabulous'' without his armor.]]
:''"Did Horus not say that you sought godhood? He built a [[Horus Heresy|rebellion]] upon that claim. How he would gloat, to see the Imperium now"
:- [[Roboute Guilliman]]

The Imperium advocates worship the Emperor as the one true God through the [[Imperial Creed]]. This creed is propagated and its adherence is enforced by the [[Ecclesiarchy|Adeptus Ministorum]] and the [[Inquisition]]. All citizens and fighters of the Imperium have little-to-no say about their choice in faith (or lack thereof); they ''must'' worship the Emperor through the various Ministorum-approved faiths throughout the galaxy (due to varying cultures, many planets have their own way of worshiping the Emperor. Although these are heavily regulated by the Ministorum to weed out any heretical influences.), there is no middle road or compromise that doesn't involve the apostate being on the receiving end of a state-sponsored public lynching. Anyone who defies or deviates from the teachings of the Imperial Creed (or even is just perceived to defy it), whether willingly or unwillingly (after all, incompetence is inexcusable in the eyes of the Emperor), is condemned as a heretic and is executed (whether its going to be fast or excruciatingly slow is dependent on the person judging the condemned). Even if someone hasn't disobeyed the Imperial Creed but is deemed to have will be treated as if they broke the Creed. Forgiveness for one's sins is possible, although these cases are exorbitantly rare (at least the ones that doesn't end with the accused being condemned to a glorious death, and it usually is extremely painful.). It doesn't help that some of the members of the Ecclesiarchy and Inquisition are so batshit insane that they are killing countless innocent followers of the Imperial Creed for no reason.

Now, the only reason the Imperium worships the Emperor is that after His fight with Horus and His internment into the Golden Throne, they pretty much forgot what the Emperor taught them when He preached the Imperial Truth. Ol' Empy did not actually tell anyone of the Chaos Gods, withholding the information even from the Primarchs in hopes of protecting them from corruption by hoping that ignorance is bliss. Unfortunately, this became part of why the Horus Heresy happened in the first place. Some saw that the Emperor [[Mortarion|lied to them by holding the truth hidden]], some did [[Magnus|not know how to handle the temptation]] the Gods conveyed, some did [[Fulgrim|not even know that they were manipulated]] all this time and by whom, some would [[Lorgar|try to seek out something to place their faith upon]], not realizing what would needed to be done to become chosen in the eyes of the Gods. Plus, it's pretty damn hard to fight against something if you don't know that it exists. The Horus Heresy novels also mentioned the [[Interex]], another atheist empire who understood that threat of Chaos, but treated that information secularly and scientifically: they told every citizen everything that was known about "Kaos", and thus resisted the taint altogether (which basically shows how ineffective the Imperial Truth really was and how much the Emperor has screwed up.)

In the Emperor's long game, he knew that humanity was evolving into a psychic species with even more potential than the Eldar, and look what happened to them? E-money wanted mankind to be [[Star Trek|a utopia of science and reason]], by eliminating religion (and thus preventing the temptations of daemons), controlling psykers (and thus preventing random daemonic possessions), and eliminating warp travel by creating the Human Webway (and thus eliminating all human contact with Chaos when traveling through the Warp). He wanted to isolate humanity from the Chaos Gods, cause who gives a shit about the Ruinous Powers if they're stuck in the Warp with no way of getting out?

Regarding the religion angle: the Emperor very much realized that Chaos runs off emotion, all everyday emotion, and not ''just'' worship; the stronger the emotions, the stronger the Gods get, and the stronger the Gods get, the easier it is to corrupt others. The problem with religion is that it allows too many avenues for Daemons to exploit: a whisper here and a miracle there, then you get people praying to them without even realizing it, then shortly afterwards you get a planet turned inside out by daemons. His plan was not to starve the chaos gods of sustenance and ultimately defeat them, he knew it was impossible, his plan was just to prevent them from touching humanity ever again.

However, He made a critical mistake in disregarding the human need to believe in something greater than oneself, and despite His best efforts, nothing was enough to fill the place of religion in human society. Ironically, the best solution would be not to suppress faith but to redirect it towards something else, but because of his natural awesomeness, unmatched psychic powers and enigmatic nature, that "something else" ended up being the Emperor himself. After He went off being the most powerful psychic cucumber in the universe, and lost direct control of the Imperium, belief in Him sort of helped the Imperium stand together against all odds, even if it basically dropped 99.9% of humanity's IQ in the process. With the Warp being what it is, the act of worshiping the Emperor supercharged His power in the Immaterium to the point of being truly godlike, even while His body is still stuck in it's current physical state of near-death. The Imperium's faith in the Emperor is basically their biggest anchor of bravery and perseverance in a universe where humanity is constantly beset by:

*[[Tyranids|Unimaginably massive swarms of voracious space locust who exist only to feed and multiply it's biomass]]...
*[[Necron|Older-than-Chaos-itself zombie-terminator robots set on culling all life from the galaxy]]...
*[[C'Tan|Diabolical celestial beings literally as old as the stars, whose single desire is harvesting all living souls]]...
*[[Orks|A race of nigh-unkillable barbarians, genetically engineered to have pastimes, ambitions, job skills, and dreams only be about rip and tear]]...
*[[Tau|Technologically superior space communists wanting to assimilate everyone in their quasi heirarchical-Communist empire and who take after Billy Mays]]...
*[[Kroot|Humanoid wingless bird men cannibals who absorb traits from what they eat]]
*[[Vespid|Humanoid insects with claws capable of ripping through the toughest armour]]
*[[Eldar|Snooty and uncaring space elves that can read minds and who eat, sleep, and to have Heterosexual Sex in the Missionary Position in planet-sized battle cruisers]]...
*[[Dark Eldar|Psychotic, hedonistic space elves who routinely torture others to the point of death for sheer amusement before grinding their remains into refined cocaine]]...
*[[Chaos|Fanatical zealots that knowingly devote themselves to all that is insane]]...
*[[Daemon|Nightmare horrors made real who will rape and eat, usually simultaneously, any sentient being they get their goat-hooves on]]...
*[[Chaos Space Marines|Deformed, demented traitors clad in power armor and aided by the evilest forms of weaponry and sorcery ever conceived]]...
*[[Lost and the Damned|Tratiors who turn their backs on the Imperium and try to destroy it]]...
*[[Rak'gol|Homicidal alien, lizard, insect, cyborg type monster-pirates that horribly kill you for fun (and who may be the puppets of an older and even more malignant civilization)]]...
*[[Slaugth|Giant Swarms of Worms in cloaks who might be older than The Old Ones who are more sadistic that the Dark Eldar and More Manipulative than regular Eldar and Feed on Humans in the Most Disgusting and Painful way imaginable (Hint it Involves Maggots.)]]...
*[[Q'Orl|Massive insectoid hive mind filled to the brim with heavy firepower and has a slow but growing empire that is one of the largest in the galaxy, dwarfing the Tau several hundred times over and is seen as the next successor of galactic domination after humanities potential fall]]...
*[[Hrud|Humanoid Rats that cause anything thing, living or not, to rapidly decay through touch]]...
*[[Games Workshop|Malignant, omnipotent intelligence from beyond the cosmos, exerting all the power at their disposal to prevent any faction from breaking the stalemate or upsetting the dreadful status quo]]...
*[[Sly Marbo|And fuck knows who the guy in the cardboard box is]]...

Without their faith in the Emperor after His internment into the Golden Throne, the fragments of the Imperium would have fought against each other again like in the pre-Great Crusade days and subsequently devolved into what they were before the Emperor revealed Himself. So yes, much like IRL religion, it gives them hope and courage to fight on and survive in a universe that leaves the [[grimdark]] faucet running everyday and night.

It's worth noting that good ol' Empy wouldn't have had nearly as much of a problem with all this unwanted worship if He hadn't, just as a quick example, insisted on wearing horrifyingly ornate solid gold armour and a big glowy halo at all times. Or on carrying a flaming sword of righteousness. Or on building continent-sized monuments to His vanity. Or on decking all His personal troops and favored genetic experiments in as much bling as they could possibly carry. Or on being eleven fucking feet tall. Or on creating a functional pantheon of genetically engineered demigods, one of whom looked like and was referred to as a literal Angel. If you look like space-Jesus and act like space-Jesus, people are going to take those observations to their extreme conclusions, like what Lorgar did when he wrote the ''Lectitio Divinitatus'', which can be summarized as "Ordinary men can't blow up suns and carry big glowy halos at all times, only a God can, therefore the Emprah is God." This is made even more relevant given that the fluff very strongly implies that the Emperor '''was''' Jesus.

That said, to Games Workshop's credit His being [[Ultramarines|buttfucked by His own hubris and disregard for the humanity He claimed to be guiding]] in this manner was probably [[Grimdark|intentional as a classic tale of Greek Tragedy]].

==The possible death of the Emperor==
[[File:Emperor of mankind flaming sword armor.jpg|500px|right|thumb|Badass and glorious.]]
With the Golden Throne being consistently worn out, and the Tech-priests too power-armor-on-head rebooted to do anything about it, it is certainly possible that the Emperor may die one day, which will obviously result in all of the Imperial worlds and factions to cry tears of disappointment and subsequently devolve into chaos (maybe even with a capital "C"). There are however, 3 possible outcomes of what can happen if the Emperor eventually dies:

===[[Warhammer 50k|The new Eye of Terror]]===
Conventional wisdom and the [[Eldar]], says that in the event that the Emperor dies, a new Eye of Terror will be created with Terra at it's center, plunging Holy Terra and all nearby planets/systems(?) into the Warp. The current main rulebook says that all of reality will be plunged into the warp if the Emperor dies. Even the [[Ecclesiarchy]] agrees that if the Emperor were ever to die, humanity would be FUCKED at the barest minimum.

This is supported by the fact that the '''Golden Throne''' ''(itself a portal to the Webway)'' was broken by [[Magnus]], causing a warp tear to open on Terra, which the Emperor has had to spend every second for the last 10,000 years concentrating on to keep from getting any bigger (while the [[Adeptus Custodes]] have spent the same amount of time chopping up daemons that slip through the crack). They will not be able to stop a full daemonic invasion if the rift would open fully. Well except that a single squad of Custodes killed over a thousand members of the Thousand Sons legion during the Burning of Prospero. Given that there are ten thousand Custodes, it's like having a thousand Primarchs on hand to beat back any daemonic invasion. Actually, in hind-sight, getting off the Throne and letting the Custodes curbstomp everything and have the Grey Knights keep the rift shut with their Chaos-purging powers would probably be the best choice.

Additionally, a new Chaos God could be created (just like with the Eye of Terror and the Eldar), which will most certainly be a God of all the Grimdarkness in the galaxy, ensuring that it would eclipse all of the powers of the other Gods, as the Emperor would finally be the God of all. This is especially true, since nearly everything that is grimdark stems from Chaos and the entire WH40K setting is itself a massive pile of it... That or Malal would burst back into existence, which does have some possibility of happening, since Malal was/is the Chaos god of Atheism, which was the "truth"-part of the Emperor's "Imperial Truth" doctrine.

Some also fear that a fifth Chaos God's presence would just crush reality by merging the Materium (reality) and the Warp into a singular dimension. But that's unlikely, since the birth of the latest Chaos God, Slaanesh, did not destroy reality and he/she/it/xe was fueled by the near extinction of a race far more psychically powerful than humanity. On the other hand, [[Slaanesh]] was forced to battle [[Khorne]] and most of the Eldar Gods during it's first birth moments. That would not be the case if the 5th Chaos God would be born. Not to mention it would have also consumed the Emperor's power as part of its gestation. Seeing as how he was strong enough to ker-smash all of the big four Chaos gods at the same time with a ''thought'' at the end of his fight with Horus...a fifth Chaos god with that power would be veeeeeeeeeeeeeerrrrrryyyyy '''BAD'''. Unless it has the Emperor's purity powers and his mind remains dominant in it. That would be very good.

===Regeneration===
No, not the [[Doctor Who]] kind. The Horus Heresy novel 'Vulkan Lives', heavily implies that the Emperor is a [[Perpetual]], just like John Grammaticus, Vulkan, Oll Persson, [[Alivia Sureka]] and [[Anval Thawn]], all of who were able to survive multiple deaths that completely obliterated their bodies in the process. So all He simply needs to do is for his current material body to die normally, and wait a couple of hours/days and He'd be reborn again (in the "get up off the ground and dust Himself off" sense (Though one has to wonder why the Emperor would have had Himself interred in the Golden Throne in the first place if He thought He'd heal. Probably to power the Astronomican?)). All of this is still speculation (duh). Vulkan, for instance, was driven mad by the torturous experiences he had endured thanks to Night Haunter, and they were child's play, compared to sitting in unthinkable agony, unable to move or speak for ten thousand years while feeling Himself rotting away. And don't you forget [[If the Emperor had a Text-to-Speech Device|that nose itch]]. However, a more commonly held belief is that He will get up, re-establish the [[Imperial Truth]], and [[Great Crusade|just be]] [[Commissar|a cool guy]].

In fact, a whole faction of the [[Inquisition]]: '''Thorianism''' exists to investigate this possibility; looking for possible signs that the Emperor's consciousness can be transferred elsewhere, allowing Him to walk among his children once more. (That said, they don't know about the existence of Perpetuals and would rather look for a new body to place the Emperor's soul into.) That being said: This may be the best option if they can keep the Emperor powering the [[Astronomican]] with one body while having his mind in a different body wandering around.

Opponents to Thorianism generally see that encouraging this is a terrible idea, as having the Emperor rise in a physical form would only cause a schism in the Imperium, as many people would not believe it to be true, having been ruled and brainwashed by the Ecclesiarchy over thousands of years, which would lead to another major [[Horus Heresy|civil war]].

But think about it: when Malcador took up the Throne so that the Emperor could fight Horus, the device consumed his vitality; and Malcador was not as blessed as the Emps with regen abilities to recover. Now imagine a weakened, crippled being, who's top priority immediately after killing His son is to stop the Webway gate from spilling forth. You don't have time (and nor does the galaxy) to recover from your wounds. So you sit upon the Throne and it consumes you slowly from that point onwards. The chair is stopping any sort of healing factor.

===The Star Child===
Although years of GW-marketing and [[retcon|fluff "upgrades"]] have made the third claim rather dubious, many fa/tg/uys and optimists still hold out on the theory stating that when the Emperor screwed Horus's soul to the wall, part of the Emperor's soul was also cast into the Warp. This Soul Fragment is called the Star Child, a god waiting to be reborn, or perhaps be reincarnated back into a human body (anyone call for one scout Mkvenner). If the remains of the Emperor were ever to die, the tiny spark of soul left in his body would re-unite with the greater whole within the Warp, and according to [[fluff|prophecy]], for the four Chaos Gods into stalemate, while the races of the galaxy would be left to battle it out in one last great Ragnarök scenario (called the End Times).

This theory is tied closely to the Illuminati, a group of either supremely enlightened individuals or dangerous mutant heretics (depending on which side of the [[Inquisition]] you're on). The Illuminati plan to catch all of the Sensei and sacrifice them upon the Golden Throne at the moment of Emperor's death.

In a bizarre fusion of new and old fluff, it has been revealed that the Illuminati were a minor Tzeentch cult and the Sensei were effectively brainwashed soon-to-be sacrifices in an attempt to bring Tzeentch to the materium. Needless to say, they have been purged by the Inquisition. The fluff in the Jac Draco books revealed that the Ordo Hydra (a small splinter faction of the Illuminati who seek to turn humanity into a psychic hive-mind) is a Tzeentch cult, but that the general Illuminati population - including many Ordo Malleus Inquisitors and the Exorcists [[Chapter]] (as well as their unknown successor chapters) are genuinely incorruptible by Chaos and are freely permitted to access the Black Library along with Harlequin Solitaires. Ultimately, all this would be rendered irrelevant as the Inquisition Trilogy was retconned away. It's just like that frustrating moment you experience when you don't know if the Squats have been nommed by Tyranids or have never existed in the first place.

===Beyond the Emperor===
As stated in ''The Master of Mankind'', the Emperor himself considers he already lost the game to save Mankind's from consuming itself into the Warp while attempting to give the evolutionary jump, with the loss of the Webway he seems to have concluded the only thing that remains is a long decline and there is nothing else to do but to wage an ever losing war. Or is it? The Emperor himself recognized He isn't omniscient, His foresight can't reach all.

During recent years the writers of Games Workshop have been hinting at a few facts, let us consider the following:
* The future is not absolutely written, and this comes from Chaos itself; even [[Tzeentch]] can't predict everything perfectly.
* The fall of the Imperium may be inevitable, mankind may live on. Given the sheer scope of the human exodus, it's perfectly likely that some remnant of the Dark Age of Technology has continued unchanged from its original height.
* The [[Cadian Pylons]], while destroyed, were developed by beings that still exist. The fact the [[Necrons]] are still around opens the possibility that they may yet be capable of building replacements, and thanks to [[Trazyn the Infinite|Trazyn]] we know they are capable of closing of warp storms. Oh, and it seems like [[Belisarius_Cawl|Uncle Cawl]] is working on that.
* The Akashic Records truly exist and are somehow linked to [[STC|Ark Mechanicus ships such as Speranza]], this simple fact means all already existing knowledge is never lost forever, but merely incredibly hard to acquire.
* Creating humans immune to Chaos is a reality, both the [[Exorcists]] and the [[Grey Knights]] are evidence to this, and while the process is excruciatingly slow, highly prone to failure and prohibitive in resources it means Mankind can achieve through artificial means a sort of new evolutionary step.
* Not all Eldar died during the Fall, even if we are talking about 1 percent of the race it's still a great deal of individuals, and the fact they have managed to kick-start [[Ynnead|an anti-Chaos god]] is something no one, not even the Emperor managed to foresee (assuming he did not know that is what the Infinity Circuits were fore, which he no doubt did considering how old he is). [[Eldrad]] has ultimately demonstrated there are other ways to fight Chaos.
* And thanks to Eldrad waking Ynnead up early (if only barely), Roboute Guilliman was awakened from stasis. Now he is preparing a [[Primaris Marines|new generation of Super Space Marines]] along with some awesome new gear to help take down chaos. Plus some of the other loyalist Primarchs are still out there, and there is a possibility that they could return to help lead the Imperium fight it's many enemies.
* And for that matter, Eldrad declared by the end of The [[War of The Beast]] that the futures of Mankind and the Eldar are irrevocably interlinked. Add to that the fact the necrons too have given the Imperium a hand a few times and you suddenly notice there are more parties than the Emperor interested in not letting the human race fall. Despite the Imperium's hatred of xenos, they may be mankind's best chance of survival.
*Nobody saw the Tyranids coming because they hadn't even noticed the Galaxy was inhabited until the whole mess with the Pharos device. Not the Chaos Gods, not the Emperor, not the Eldar (though [[Orikan the Diviner|Orikan]] saw them coming), and the Tyranids are both an outside context issue for the galaxy (being the only faction with galactic pull that is completely and unambiguously disconnected from the War in Heaven or the Horus Heresy that serves as everyone else's origin stories) ties and a wild card in the fate of the Galaxy.
* Finally, there is humanity itself. While He failed to take into account the fact that humanity is a mass of individuals rather than an abstraction, He also underestimated how this could work for good as well as evil. For every traitor and heretic, there is an equally devoted believer in the inherent goodness of mankind willing to stand against the Ruinous Powers, and it is on the individual level that the struggle between the Ruinous Powers and humanity is ultimately fought and decided upon.
* And one last thing, there is a chance that if the Emperor dies, he might just resurrect or incarnate (and Ynnead is still out there) so he might still have a second chance. This is further aided by the fact we don't know how quickly he would resurrect himself, being a perpetual. If it is quick enough (or if he remains potent while his soul is in the Warp until he revives), he can probably prevent or perhaps even close the Terra warp rift. Then he's back in the game ready to put his powered armor on and kick ass.

Yes, the Emperor failed to avoid mankind's inherent flaws to hinder His Great Work (ironically, because He was guilty of several of them as well), but He also failed to see a lot of the good things mankind can bring in. In yet another twist of irony, his incapability to predict us may even thwart his own prediction of humanity's doom.

Indeed, this is [[Warhammer 40,000]], a cautionary tale about the End of Empires, but so was Warhammer Fantasy Battle, and, although we won't like the AoS-ification of the setting, there may still be more than [[Abaddon|just a complete failure]] for the future of Mankind and the Emperor.

== Gallery ==
<center><gallery>
Image:Golden Throne-Imperial Webway.jpg|The Big E upon the Golden Throne (before the decay set in)
Image:Emperor of Mankind Classic Portrait face.jpg|The guiding light in the Imperium of Man shines forever bright. He's also Arnold Schwarzenegger. Try unseeing that now bitches.
Image:1220179589932.jpg|The Emperor protects man from all.
Image:Horus and the Emperor.jpg|<s>Son, I am disappoint.</s> Empy's disappointment occurred well before this moment.
Image:Wh40k-emperor.jpg| Yearbook photo.
Image:When you ruin his groove by Lutherniel.jpg| His groove, do not ruin it. Or you'll get schooled.
Image:Emperor_Decree.jpg| Emps laying down some rules, mid combat from the looks of it
Image:Go Ahead Make My day Emperor.jpg|That is EXACTLY the same look that's on Batman's face when he's about to put the beatdown on someone!
Image:Emperor of Mankind model action figure.jpg|He makes for one helluva action figure
Image:8.jpg|The Em-purr-or of all Catkind! Nyah!
Image:God-Emperor_Goldlich.jpg|Death is no excuse to stop bein' pimp.
Image:God_Emperor_Interred_On_Golden_Throne.jpg|Thinking to himself, "I really, REALLY hate Horus!" Then again he never liked Horus in the first place.
Image:The Immortal Emprah.jpg|The Emperor isn't looking good here.
Image:Emperor_miniature.jpg|Roll d6; stays on the field on seven or less
Image:emperor_old.jpg|A real man never dies, even when he's killed.
Image:emperor.png|Down but not out.
Image:Emperormini.jpg|In all His miniature glory
Image:Carrionlord.jpg|<strike>The Carrion Lord with his two left arms.</strike> {{BLAM}} how the fuck did that heretic get past the custodes?
Image:Painting.jpg|This painting sold for $900, that lucky ca/tg/url...
Image:Emperor_model.jpg|Probably the best model of him yet
Image:slowemperor.jpg|Oh God-emperor, how did this get here? I am not good with computers.
Image:Emperor_Sagan.jpg|Search your feelings, you know it to be true.
Image:EmpsVSigmar.jpg| You all know you wanna see how this pans out!
Image:Emprasque3.jpg|How do you kill what can not die?
Image:Slavegirl Emperor.jpg|Emperor [[Rule 63]]! NO EXCEPTIONS!
Image:Femprah.jpg|Not actually the God-Emperor; besides it is Heresy to believe that The Immortal God Emperor looks like Cher. {{BLAM}} {{BLAM|'''HERESY!'''}}, no make that [[Extra Heresy|extra Hersey]]
Image:Femprah_by_Mr-Culexus.jpg|Oh, give it a fucking rest...
Image:GodEmpress.jpg|On second though... this one is... nice. - {{BLAM}} {{BLAM|'''Heresy!'''}}
Image:Emperor_upon_his_other_throne.jpg|Yeah. We get it. The Emperor sits upon the Golden 'Throne'.
Image:1377291976783.jpg|Unbeknownst to many 40k fans, ol'Emps is actually fairly amicable when he meets an elf/eldar who isn't a complete and utter failure.
Image:Rainbow Emperor.gif| The Emperor in Rainbow Form
Image:Konya.jpg|The symbol of the town Konya in Turkey. In Central Anatolia. Emprah's birthplace. CONNECTION, BITCHES!
Image:Hittite eagle large.jpg|The symbol of ancient (1600BC) Hittite Empire from Anatolia, which, unknown to many, is Emperor's first try at conquering the world. CONNECTION, BITCHES!
Image:Emperor mao.jpg|In alternate universe 32-B, Mao Zedong rules the People's Republic of Mankind
Image:NotSureIfWant.jpg|The Emperor has just discovered [[Rule 34]].
Image:1393390057238.png|The Emperor is a man of simple tastes.
Image:Emperuh.jpg|The Emprah is watching you Masturbate!
Image:Emperor blackwhite.jpg|The very first image of the Emperor, dating back to Rogue Trader.
Image:God_Emperor_Numen_Kawai_Onii-chan.jpg|[[Drawfags|Kawaii]] [[End Times|Emprah teaching]] us about the evils of [[Heresy|heretics]], while displaying his mighty [[Pauldrons]].
Image:First_Founding_Problems.jpg|Perhaps with a better armor design (or if he actually cared about him), The Big E might not have been late for all of [[Horus]]'s after school soccer games and things might have turned out a lot differently.
Image:1271118030729.jpg|Just imagine what would had happened if the Chaos Gods didn't scatter the primarchs through out the galaxy and The Emperor didn't have to go and look for them... Wait a minute, where is that little scamp Omegon? (he's just off picture, sneaking up behind Guilliman)
File:Emperor of Mankind Contemplation.jpg|"Why IS IT that hot dogs come in packs of 8, and hot dog buns come in packs of 12? So people will have to buy 3 packs of hot dogs and 2 of hot dogs buns, hereby promoting imperial production of course! Ketchup sold separately!"
</gallery></center>

==See Also==
* The [[Imperium]], for the empire he founded.
* [[Malcador the Sigillite]], the Emperors best bro.
* The [[Primarch|Primarchs]], the Emperors "sons".
* [[Sigmar]] Unbroken, his [[Warhammer Fantasy Battles]] counterpart.
* [[Emperor's To-Do List]]
* [http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/25959559/ This thread] which makes the Emperor even cooler.
* [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z_2nM1GEllg/ A series on Youtube, it shows what would happen if the Emperor had a Text to Speech device.]
* [[If the Emperor had a Text-to-Speech Device]]
* [[Heresy from the Emprah’s point of view]]
* [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RBpijRDDOxQ His reaction to the] [[Extra Heresy|"God Emperor Trump" forced meme"]]
{{Imperium}}

[[Category:Gods]][[Category:Awesome]]

Ork

2017-11-03T17:46:11Z

2A02:C7F:4006:2900:70D0:365F:B01A:862:

{{awesome}}
'''''"WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!"''''' 
:-Da Orks, all da zoggin' time.
[[File:Orks attack3.jpg|600px|thumb|right|'Ere we zoggin' go, let's break sum' 'eads!]]
{{Topquote|War means fighting, and fighting means killing.|Nathan Bedford Forrest}}
{{Topquote|War is the business of barbarians.|Napoleon Bonaparte}}

The '''Orks''' are a race in [[Warhammer 40,000]]. Commonly known as "Greenskins" or "the Green Tide", they're probably the most numerous and infestive race in the entire 40K setting, or at least on par with the [[Tyranids]]. They have a ''[[Warhammer Fantasy]]'' equivalent, the only major differences being that fantasy Orks are now called Orruks, and they have a (slightly) lower level of technology relative to the setting.

==Overview==
[[File:Ork_Boy.jpg|200px|thumb|left|[[Ork_Boy|The original Boy]]. This guy has been around since 2nd ed.]]
Orks are the most successful race of the [[Warhammer 40,000 | 41st millennium]]. Despite their entire lack of structured education or training, they seem to be very proficient with all kinds of technology, which they inevitably utilize for their armaments (of which firearms and vehicles are the most common). This is explained away in the fluff by their origins: they were created by the [[Old Ones#Warhammer 40,000|Old Ones]] to be a warrior race called the ''Krork,'' and some of them (the Mekboyz) were genetically hard-wired to have a pre-programmed proficiency for technological engineering. Unfortunately, the Old Ones died before they could finish their little science project; specifically the psychic control mechanism. The ancient Krork were known to have fought the ancient Eldar empire when the latter was at the peak of its power and were implied to have been a considerable threat (a Harlequin in M32 compares the nearly invincible hordes of the Beast as being like children compared to them).
This means that such war machines simply fight everything, everywhere, all the time. In principle, Orks can loot just about anything: the minor greenskins, such as "Grotz" ([[goblin]]s) can construct several working vehicles and machines out of mere scrap (They actually can't but orks believe they can so it happens see: a few paragraphs below).

The Orks derive much of their success from their reproductive process: Orks are, essentially, a psychosensitive hybrid of animal and fungi, not unlike a very complex version of a lichen. One advantage is a redundancy of vital organs, making them able to easily survive events such as head transplants and the fact that it's not easy to kill an individual Ork since they could very well shrug off injuries that would put a human to a crippled state. In fact there is a [[Valhalla|Valhallan]] folktale about a relative finding an Ork, [[Carnifex#Old_One_Eye|thawing it out only for it to attempt to kill them]]. Another advantage is their ability to grow larger as they win more battles (due to the aforementioned psychosensitivity): an Ork who is winning a fight is enjoying himself, which causes fluctuations in the gestalt field that all Orks generate. These fluctuations supercharge the Ork's physiology, causing the Ork to gain muscle mass and evolve. Consequently, if an Ork should somehow be incapable of fighting (like being imprisoned); they will actually ''devolve'' instead, causing the Ork to become pudgy and lethargic. This was observed during [[Xenology]] where a captive Ork was eventually found morbidly obese when the Inquisitor brought him out for dissection. Hence,the saying: "Orkz iz made fer fighten' and winnin'" applies literally in their case, as the incentives of fighten' and winnin' are what makes or breaks an Ork.

In addition, the fungal part of their physiology allows Orks to reproduce asexually en masse through underground fungal colonies that act as self-sustaining ecosystems. Reproductive spores enter the topsoil, produce fungal mycelia that assimilate base nutrients and could exchange genetic information with other mycelia, putting normal Human sexual reproduction to shame, and eventually produce lesser Orkoids: squigs and Grotz. The Grotz cultivate the protein-rich squigs in preparation for the emergence of the greater Orks, which take longer to develop. All in all, this cycle was designed to fight against the Necrons, which sterilized a planet to its bacteria. Orks can terraform a barren planet into a veritable paradise this way, though what defines "paradise" is a point of discussion; if you like endless wars and tribal conflicts in a mushroom rich planet, it probably is. IS YOU SAYIN' DERE'S FINGS WHAT DON'T LIKE FIGHTIN' FEREVER? DEM UMIES IS REEL GOOD AT MAKIN' FORTS FER US TA KRUMP, SO DEY MUST LIKE FIGHTIN'...

Though all Orks discharge reproductive spores throughout their lives, the most significant and numerous emissions occur when an Ork ''is dismembered or dies.'' This means that, for Orks, combat and death are their principal means of reproduction and genetic exchange, and a Space Marine/Guardsman chainsawing/shooting/artillery-bombarding an ork just results in ten thousands, if not millions, of Orks coming for ya, kinda like [[tyranids]]. Nice Job chainsawing it, Space Marine. Due to this, an Ork infestation is incredibly hard to handle if kept unchecked since it won't take them long to get enough boyz to launch a full-scale WAAAGH! to overrun an entire planet and necessitate [[Exterminatus]]. We can use flamethrowers, [[Plasma]], nukes, [[melta]] weapons or anything high-energy to eradicate any spores and fungi, saving the world from the eventual Exterminatus, but then again, efficiency ain't manly n' [[grimdark]] enough compared to good ol' spore-releasing bolters, chainswords and artillery.

Orks only have two popular combat doctrines: [[Choppa|choppy]], which involves giving your opponents a good stomping up close, and [[dakka|shooty]] which involves spitting out as many bullets as possible with an assortment of shootas, and the faster it shoots; the better. That said, a good shoota should also still be able to kill enemies ''while'' putting out a lot of dakka, otherwise it wouldn't be killy (and woe betide an Ork who isn't killy). Because of the Ork's naturally low penchant for accuracy; they typically get around this problem in two methods: the first one is to have a gun that simply shoots bullets as fast as Orkily possible that the wielder ''should'' be able to hit something eventually (strapping two or more shootas together is a crude but effective way to go about this). The second one is to make the gun really killy every time it shoots, like putting a dangerously high-explosive shell in a kannon that can obliterate an entire building in one shot.

Orks are commonly believed to be stupid and superstitious by the other races of the 40k world, but they can also be cunning and quick on the draw. Orks are always ready for a fight and while you can trick them, they quite like the idea of tricking people back.

Their philosophy of DA RED WUNZ GO FASTA is the ultimate truth: because of the aforementioned gestalt field, Ork vehicles painted red will, ultimately, go faster than Ork vehicles that are ''not'' painted red because the Orks believe that Red makes everything go faster:
DIS 'UMIE GIT THINKZ DAT DA RED WUNZ DON'T GO FASTA? DEY DON'T KNOW DAT ANYFING PAINTED RED MAKES IT DA BEST AN' MAKES IT GO FASTAAAA COZ RED IZ BEST! '''*WHAM!*''' NO IT AIN'T, YA BLEEDIN' SQUIG, '''GREEN''' IZ BEST! '''*Boots up the bog*''' SHUT YER GOB, 'E WAS TALKIN' 'BOUT DA TRUKKS, YA GIT!

We can assume that this cuts both ways, with enemies such as the Blood Angels and White Scars gaining the same boost due to their use of red paint.

A hallmark of Orkoid, for lack of a better term, civilization is the WAAAGH!. Pronounced similar to "war" as the "GH" is silent. Always written in all-caps, with at least three "A"s and an exclamation point, the WAAAGH! occurs when an Ork population reaches critical mass and a dominant Warboss appears. A Warboss is an Ork Alpha who is bigger than all the other Orks and have proven his right to lead by either his sheer size or krumpin' all the other big Orks that thinks otherwise. Lesser Orks sense the presence of the Boss in the Orks' psychic field and follow him on what is often described as a combination of pub riot and holy war with a dash of genocide. The WAAAGH! accomplishes two things: it weeds out weaker Orks, keeping the species strong; and it facilitates genetic exchange and reproduction as the Orks die and release spores.

The Ork economy is based on teef, more information on which [[toof|can be found here]].

Ork religious beliefs also help manage their population. Orks believe in two gods, [[Gork]] and [[Mork]]. One is the god of cunning brutality and the other is the god of brutal cunning, the difference being that one hits you when you aren't looking and the other hits you harder when you are. Unfortunately, no one can decide which god is which, nor can the Orks decide which is better: cunning brutality or brutal cunning. These differences of opinion tend to lead to Gigantic Brawls, yet another method of keeping the Ork race strong, warlike and in check. Their division also keeps them perpetually divided, for it has been theorized that if the Orks were to ever unite in one big WAAAGH!, their gestalt reality-warping field might just as well turn omnipotent and crush all opposition

Ork society is effectively the perfect society. Its society is a Kratocracy (A Government ruled by the strongest, fitting for Orks) in maturity as all disputes are settled fairly quickly and painfully (just the way they like it). The economy is steady, as teef grow and rot at a reliable rate. Once a Boss is in charge, mostly everyone falls into place, and the Orks go and [[/tg/ Gets Shit Done|get shit done]].

Also, they probably killed the Imperial Fists. All of them.

Fun fact: The orks use black and white on their shock troops, because it reminds them of the Luna Wolves who destroyed them at Ullanor. The orks do not fear death, but they do fear the Luna Wolves. That is right, Horus traumatized them as a race more than the fucking grim reaper. Note: Why would you fear death, if death usually results in you being reborn into several thousands of yourself? Horus probably swept the spores up post battle and that's why they fear him. Though it's also worth mentioning that Orks harbor a natural fear of Commander Farsight too, whom they know as "Da Red Commit". Though given that the Dawn Blade consumes the souls of those it kills, it's likely that any Orks cut down by Farsight do not reproduce. But then again he was committing Ork genocide long before he found the blade so...

==Ork Teknology==

[[File:Dat zoggin bigmek by majesticchicken.jpg|220px|thumb|left|A perfect example of Ork tech. Powered by make-believe and the essence of love, and patched together with duct tape and chewing gum, the emperor himself has truly never seen finer craftsmanship or innovation.]]

Ork technology works mainly because the Orks think it does. The official explanation is that the subconscious gestalt psychic field that all Orks generate enables their technology to function; the stronger the field, the more unlikely their technological achievements become. In older versions of the fluff, if you hand an Ork a pipe and convince him it's a gun, it WILL shoot bullets. They're like reality-warping Physical "Gods", only weakened by their stupidity and their preference to fight each other instead of uniting, hence why the Imperium still manages to survive in these dark times. In later versions, this has been toned down from "impossible" to merely "unlikely" because GW won't keep anything canon that's that [[derp|badass]]. If Ork technology is held together by spit, duct tape, and hope, then the Orks' psychic field provides the hope.

For example: a Wartrukk with a mob of Orks in it sputters and dies. Da boyz hop out and have a look.
One of da boyz examines the readouts and says to the Nob driver, "Da bloody fing is outta gas!"
Said Nob hits the offending Ork in the face so hard that he falls unconscious. "Look 'ere, I'z da boss, and I sez I filled this fing up righ' before we left!"
The rest of da boyz look at each other, halfway convinced. He ''is'' the biggest Ork among them, and he ''did'' just prove it. Maybe he ''did'' fill it up right before they left. That's the sort of thing one does when one's in charge. Da boyz begin to file back into the Wartrukk, and with a satisfied nod, the Nob gets in and cranks her up. Because da boyz believe that there is plenty of fuel in the truck, one drop does for ten, and the Wartrukk and da boyz arrive just in time for the next fight.

The purpose for this sort of thing is primarily to compensate for the Orks' technological disadvantage by comparison with races like the [[Tau]], [[Necron]]s, or the [[Eldar]]. For example, a meat cleaver in the hands of an Ork can tear through the toughest ceramite armor if the Ork believes it will; for anyone BUT an Ork, a power weapon or the equivalent would be required to do so. This tends to work well for them, but not for the other races of the galaxy: Imperial observers note that Ork weapons generally will not function in the hands of a non-Ork. The only reason the Orks haven't exploited the limits of their generated gestalt field by creating easily made but devastatingly powerful weaponry that could eclipse the weapons of the other races is that they themselves do not know nor understand that they create said field, they believe that their equipment works because that's how the universe wants it to work, not because they themselves are making it work. Which I guess makes it true. This, in turn, makes for an interesting paradox: If orks managed to understand the physical universe as it is, they would not believe their "weapons" work, thus, stripping them of their psychic advantage. If there is a little ounce of disbelief, this would wreck their ability to... believe hard enough so as to manipulate reality.

This said, Orky know-wots DO have a say in stuff that the Orks build. Mekboyz build much of the stuff they do because they have been genetically ingrained with the knowledge on how to make and maintain their technology. While much of their tech runs because they want to, the basis is that the Orks ''can'' actually build a conceptually working frame to get all Orky on. This explains how Orks can build such technological wonders as the Shokk Attack Gun, which propels [[Snotling|Snotlings]] through the Warp and into the armor, tanks, [[Rape|and bodies]] of their enemies. Also, there ''have'' been instances of Ork tech working well in the hands of other races,( at least for a time till it blows up). Be careful though, most Ork players have ''very'' deep-set opinions on how Orky tech works, and [[skub|debates]] between them can generate much [[RAGE]].

Occasionally, if a "tech-caste" gets into control of an Ork society, ridiculous constructions can result. Best example we know about is the Telon Reach Empire and its central stronghold Gorro. A "scrapworld", Gorro was full of things that shouldn't have worked at all (Horus notes that individual bits of architecture inside were just too mad for any human to contemplate) and could withstand the normally planet-killing weapons on the Vengeful Spirit and Emperor's own flagship. The Orks defending it were far more advanced than most (everything from their augmententations to the accuracy of their ships' weapons) and had actually built a plasma reactor to hold their world together. Their function mostly relied on the Orks' gestalt, as the core began to fail as the Emperor, Horus and their respective posses carved through the population. Once the Emperor killed the resident Warboss and psychically burned the rest of the Orks (a preview of what he'd eventually do to Horus) the system went into total meltdown.

===Special Note on Orky Vehicles===
To properly describe what Ork vehicles are like is a difficult prospect, or perhaps an overlooked opportunity. Either way, few actually attempt to clarify in tangible terms what orkish vehicle-makers create.

Let's start with the venerable Trukk. Keep in mind that the standard Ork Boy is a hunched, monstrous, 7-foot-tall Hulk Hogan. Now, the Trukk is essentially an over-sized, skeletal pickup truck, with armored bus tires and a spiked ram-plate for a bumper. The frame is then covered in all manner of inch-thick armor plating, the basic standard in orkish vehicle armor. No Ork vehicle with more than two wheels has an engine smaller than a V8, and the trukk is no exception. A common brag for a trukk owner, "I'z put twelve silenderz in dis 'ere kart" (when not met with the classic "You shoulda sprung fer forteen!" comeback), is similar to a human saying he put an extra two cylinders in his car and overhauled his transmission.

Larger orkish vehicles, like the Big Trakk, often use V14 engines that any human would say belongs on a fishing trawler. Alternatively, some vehicles use turbine engines for extra torque (which is always a good thing) and a higher top speed (also a good thing), or crackling electrical engines (less popular than a good-old combustion engine, but can "accidentally" taze pesky Lootas or enemies who get too close (i.e. rammed)). Big Trakks are literally the size of a heavy tank, but are completely open-topped to provide a chassis for hauling Boyz or insanely big gunz into the fight. They have banks of fat-tired wheels or, most likely, four-plus-foot-wide treads. They have as much torque as a Battle Wagon and fear no infantry.

==Orks and the Emperor==

One theory of the [[Emperor|Emprahs]] continued existence (despite the fact his throne is in serious need of an MOT) is the fact that the Orks BELIEVE it to be so. As any self-respecting Weirdboy will tell you, what da boyz fink will 'appen (see below), so if they think the Emperor is still alive then alive he will be. Probably cos they're not stupid enough to realise he's a corpse more fucked than a Slaaneshi cultist at Ciaphas Cain's place.. 'ANG ON A SECOND.. I FINK DEY BE MAKIN FUN OF US...WELL.....MAYBE WE OUTTA GO STOMP SUM HUMIES! (that's right, the "chaos boys" are messing with you orks, go stomp them in the name of the Emp... For the WAAAGGGHH!. aehm..)

==Special Groups of Orks==
Apart from the regular Boyz, there are several groups of Orks who specialize in a specific task or doctrine. Called Oddboys (if they are relatively normal when fighting time rolls around) or Weirdboys (when they shoot lighting out of their eyes, gunz or eye-gunz). The most common ones are:

===[[Oddboys|Oddboyz]]===
This category is filled with Orks who express genetic predispositions to certain tasks. Here are your Mekboys (engineers), Painboys (doctors), Weirdboys (psykers), Madboyz (psychos), Slaverz (take care of grots, snotlings and slaves), [[Dorfs|Brewerz]] (makers of alcohol; retconned), [[Noise Marines|Rockaz]] (musicians; also retconned), and Shoutaz (communications experts).

====Kult of Speed====

[[File:Kult o speed by majesticchicken.jpg|250px|thumb|right|'''WAAAAAAAAGHHHOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!''']]

[[Speed freeks]] who commonly go into the battlefield on bikes hyped up on dakka and flashy bitz, as their name suggests, they'z like goin' faster dan fast. On tabletop, they're okay, since they're really shooty for Orks and fairly cheap. These guys field the classic Mobile Ork Army, which causes loads of [[Butthurt]] and [[Rage]] when people go up against them. Just look out for Lascannons.
*'''[[Deff Skwadron | Flyboys]]''' - Crazed pilots that like fast vehicles, death defying stunts, and lots of dakka. The better pilots, fighta aces, are held in great esteem only by other flyboys and tend to give themselves crazy-cool nicknames.

====[[Burna Boyz | Burna boyz]]====
Burna boyz are similar to standard orks in ability, possessing no unique qualities except every one of them being a pyromaniac. These boys are the type who would burn their own mother alive if she tried to stop them from playing with matches, even though Orks technically don't have moms. As such, they regularly burn their own comrades for the hell of it (to see them 'do da burny dance'). Their obsession with fire is of course, genetically coded, and this has a particular disadvantage during periods of time where stealth is of the essence. In fact, this pyromania coupled with the rate of accidental deaths among Orks may explain why Burna boyz aren't more common; after all, an Ork that accidentally burns himself to death wouldn't be able to spread his spores so easily. On a more lighthearted note, they are also quite fond of fungus cigars! GREEN IZ BEST

====[[Mekboy|Mekboys]]====
Meks are Orks who are capable of making the ramshackle yet effective weapons and vehicles the Orks use. They're primarily the ones who makes the warband's wagons, restore salvaged vehicles, and create/modify weapons. An Ork who lead bands of Mekboys is called a "Big Mek", and is a bitch to kill on tabletop if he's kitted out. [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tZQdaEFa_60 Five-up cover saves for everyone!] 'Ho says we aint smart 'n' such! Only fing betta den an ork is an ork wif a good bit of technorkology 

====[[Tankbustas]]====
Many Orks enjoy the odd explosion. These guys like that so much that they decided what better way to get their kicks than to get into a nice squad of 5-15 boys and try blowing tanks sky high with their rokkits. They also train Squigs to run into tanks while strapped to the hilt with explosives. And if neither of that works, run into close-combat and strike the tank with a rokkit attached to a metal stick. They get so high off this that they will enter the broken vehicle, eat any survivors, and drink the motor oil in a ritual act known as "GETTIN' TANKED!" 

====[[Lootas]]====
Lootas are Orks who are obsessed with pimping out their shootas by salvaging bitz from their enemies. Lootas are critically important to Orkish mechanical industry, because they head salvage operations and assist Meks where Grots can't. They're also the ones who loot wrecked tanks and vehicles after a battle to use as Looted Wagons, with the help of Mekboys, which means Orks can remobilize rapidly, and scale up to match tank-driving foes. <strike>When not fighting or looting, Lootaboyz are a menace to Orky society, stealing, swindling, making trouble, and being the reason other Boyz can't have nice things.</strike> WOT?! YIZ SAYIN' DERE'S TIME WHEN DA ORKZ AIN'T FOIGHTIN' OR LOOTIN'?! I OUTTA GIVE YA A STAMP!!!

====[[Flash Gitz]]====
<strike> DA PIMPIEST ORK IZ DA BESTEST ORK!!!!!!</strike> Dat is why dey arrogant Gits. They are another group of shoota-obsessed Orks known as "Flash Gitz"; rich, obnoxious Bad Moonz gits who buy powerful weapons and upgrades using their large stockpiles of [[toof|teef]]. They love nothing more than showing off their wealth and (supposedly associated) martial power. They do things like wearing ''FABOLOUS'' clothing, sporting huge banners declaring their awesomeness (shogun-style), and plating everything they have in gold, silver, platinum, or any other shiny metal they have at hand (although gold is preferred). Goldz iz da bestest. Flash Gitz boast the shootiest kustom shootaz in all of orkdom, sometimes known as "snazzgunz", which makes them an invaluable asset to their clan. Conversely, due to their boasting and attitude problems they often alienate pretty much every other Ork they work with, and are prone to getting their arrogant asses booted out of their group the moment they become less useful than annoying.

====[[Freebooterz]]====
Orks who raid and pillage the galaxy as MOTHERFUCKING PIRATES. And just to add to their awesomeness, they'll usually dress and/or speak like pirates. (W)AAARG! Well-known individuals include Kaptins Badrukk and Bludflagg.

====[[Ork Kommando|Kommandos]]====
Orks who managed to figure out that charging a gunline isn't always the best option, so dey'z da sneakiest of da Orks. They typically paint themselves purple, which Orks believe is the sneakiest color (and because Orks are Orks, purple does in fact make them harder to see ... don't ask how the fuck that one works, it just does Hav you eva seen a purpul ork? Course not, dey's too sneaky . Kommandos rely on stealth tactics rather than balls-out firepower, and achieve this by using crude camouflage techniques, Speshul Forces equipment such as NVGs, various types of grenades, and all those other gubbins that makes them all sneaky. The concept of Orks using tactics beyond drowning their enemies in corpses and bullets is so completely out there that a lot of Imperial commanders [[Skaven|do not believe that Kommandos actually exist]], but nobody laughed when a Kommando unit suddenly [[Blood Ravens|hi-jacked]] a unit of 3 [[Deathstrike Missile Launcher]]s inside a Mordian regiment's lines drove 1 to the front and proceeded to launch it at the their front lines, killing thousands, including a [[Baneblade]] (Except for the Orks, who laughed their faces off as this was happening). Meanwhile, the Kommandos ran off with the remaining one and 2 extra missiles.

Kommandos are typically distrusted by Orks due to their chosen battle strategy. They view as sneaking about rather than getting to a fight, right and proppa as "Muckin' about". The enjoyment of the color purple among them is also considered right strange. As there aint no such thing as a purple ork!

In practice, all of this boils down to a fairly simple difference in tactics. Whereas a normal Ork Boy will see the enemy and immediately [[WAAAGH|shout]], run up to him, and smash him in the head, a Kommando will see the enemy, hide behind a nearby [[Catachan Jungle Fighters|bush]]/[[Dorf|barrel]]/[[Creed|lamp-post]] and wait for the enemy to get close like 5 feet to 2 meters, THEN shout, run up to him, and smash him in the head.

An ork asked about Kommando groups. "I dinna see anyfing... Do you?"

====Feral Orks====
Hidden away in GW fluff are these guys. These guys are what happens after a WAAAGH! has left your planet. They crop up in wildernesses and form tribes. They don't have technology (like shootas) or any kind of mekboys or even good resources to build junk. They are roughly on par with your [[Warhammer Fantasy|Fantasy]] Orks, so you can just use your Fantasy army in 40k if you can fluff your army right. Not like it matters, it's the same tactic either game. They tend to have Grots, Kommandos and Weirdboys coming out of their ears, and love to ride big squigs. If you don't prune them back to the forest well enough, they might sic buttloads of squiggoths on you. Snakebites love these guys, and if space-born Orks pick them up, Feral Orks usually become Snakebites anyway.

They breed a special kind of Oddboy, the Pigdok, who is a combination of a Mek and a Dok, but excels at neither. They do surgical procedures like a stereotypical medicine man, wander around covered in robes and talismans given to them by the Weirdboy Shamans, and head the construction of things like ballistas and catapults, all the way up to magical stompy Idols and the [[Titans_40k#Orky_Titans|Steam Gargant]].

====[[Weirdboy | Weirdboyz]]====
Weirdboyz are Orks who are active psykers. All Orks are passive psykers, emitting their gestalt field, but Weirdboyz are the only ones who can decide they're gonna blow another Ork's face off with a mean look and a lightning bolt (well, the only Orks who can decide to do it and it'll happen). They tend to be crazy and can blow up if they're not careful. Even when they are careful. Sometimes blowing up is the preferred/expected option for a Weirdboy.

==Retcons==
All following Ork Oddboys have been retconned, at least by GW's word. They live on in our hearts (and custom-models) as:

===Rokkas===
[[Rogue Trader]] Orks with a penchant for hard rock, metal, leather armor, and overgrown hair squigs. While still technically retconned, they do seem to keep cropping up in the fluff. Also known as Goff Rokkas, these boyz tend to come out of the Goffs exclusively, but it isn't completely unknown for other Clans to spit out one of these crazy green "musicians". They play machine gun guitars and [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L_wdRy7x4Sc PARTY 'ARD!!!]
It should be noted that Rokkas were invented in the Eighties, so they don't play things like Death Metal as much as they do generic Metal, 80's Metal, electric guitar ballads, and Hard Rock. It should also be noted that they are still available on Games Workshop's site. PARTY ON!
===Shoutas===
These orks have over-developed lungs and super-strong vocal cords so that they can [[Derp|yell really loud.]] Yes, you heard me right. They yell across Gargant-tops and over battlefield din to act as a telecommunications array. <strike>See, not all things that were retconned were too good to last.</strike> '''SHUDDUP STOOPID HUMIE, WHUT DO YOU KNOW?!?!?! SHOUTAS IZ DA BEST!!!!!!!'''

'''YOU'Z CALL DAT SHOUTIN'? YOU'Z AIN'T A REEL SHOUTA, YA GIT!'''


'''A REAL SHOUTA'''

'''DROWNS OUT DA'''

'''COMPUTISHUN!'''

'''I Konkur!'''


'''I'z prefur sneekin' up to some hummie and shoutin' in iz ear from reel gut close.'''


Anyone caught messing with this section again will get their shit handed to them. Do you know how fucking hard it is to make sure this shit is right? I can't do this AND dodge those fucking Orks. I'm a janitor, not a FUCKING BENDY PENIS!

'''See, iffin' you'z had sum of dat purpley paint, dis wouldn' be a problem now, would it?'''

''' 'e got youz good, e' did. aneewayz da squigs ated da inturn again. Git ta cleenen dat wod ya.'''

===Brewerz===
Again, not technically retconned, but never mentioned after about 3rd Edition. Brewerz, or Brewer Boyz function much like Mekboys or Mad Doks do, knowing the inns and outs of brewing through genetically inherited inntuition. They make alcohol out of squigs. Made everything from beers to malts to meads to liquors to scotches. Yes, certain squigs can be made into scotch. No, no grains are involved in the process. No, they've never don this in Scotland. No, you may not question this.
SQUIGGIE WALKER - RED LABEL! COS IT ZOGZ YOU IN DA BRAIN FASTA!
''Eend out of mashrooms too booss!'' 
[[What|Basically, they brew babies into beer sometimes.]] 
 
<strike>'''HERESY, ORK HERESY, ANY IMPERIAL CITIZENS WILL BE MURDERED ON SIGHT AFTER READING THIS.'''</strike>''' *WHAM* OY BOSS, DEM HUMIES IZ TRYN'A TAKE AWAYZ OUR SQUIG JUICE!
'''

''' Zoggin DAMN'IT! NOT AGAIN!'''

===Female Orks===

MY EYES!!!! THEY BURN!!!

Vaguely referenced in older fluff and glimpsed during Blood Bowl, sacrificed because nobody wants to see those canonized saggy Ork tits (Except [[/d/]]), and fucking whores (and ye mum). Suffice to say, some drawfags will still draw them and several on [[/tg/]] will doubtlessly [[Faptau|fap]] to it. Considering how many random mutations are seen amongst the Orks, the possibility is [[Meme|more likely than you'd think]]. In normal canon, Orks are asexual, popping out of fungal growths in the ground...

...but in the older fluff, when the Orks were basically Fantasy Orcs in space, there ''were'' female orks. Later fluff [[retcon]]ned this, so that in later parts of their life cycle Orks would temporarily develop sexual characteristics and go bang one another. For the sake of Games Workshop's writers' self-respect, this too was also retconned. And all but the drawfags are happy for that. All in all though, the idea of female orks or goblinoids of any sort is much more readily accepted across most genres involving greenskins of any sort, so the decision may more likely have been to make the Orks dependent on getting blown up to repopulate along with being hardlined for blockbuster style war (though, as with all evolution, this is mutable to change, as there are Orks like the Blood Axes who understand ideas like trading with da' humies', peace, and using functional armor and weapons that don't stop working just because da' mob' believes dey are useless. SEE, HUMIES ARE GUD' F'R SOME FINGS BUT NOT EVERY FING!).

 Oi'm twalf an' wots dis? 

===Brain Boyz===
Brain Boyz is how the Orks call the Old Ones. The retcon is that the Orks' origin has shifted around a few times, such as the Brain Boyz being the ancestors of the Snotlings (although the Orks still believe that, but it's no longer the official explanation it was in Rogue Trader).

(Dat'z still canon! Codex 7th ED 2014 and we'z seen it in the one before dat un!!!! What shrooms did ya zoggin' gits eat?!)

==Ork Klanz==
Oi, listen up ya gits. Dere's six diverant majah clanz of Ork, and dey's all right 'ard. Da clanz waz made way back by [[The Beast|the biggest, baddest warboss dere eva waz]], startin' out as his specialist boyz before dey became dey own klanz.

<ul style='color:green;font-size:100%'>
* Dere's da '''Snakebites''', and dey'z a buncha fundie gits what won't use any teknowlogy more complicated den a [[choppa]] an' warpaint. Anytime dere's a world dat a WAAAAAGH smashed up, it gets full o' fundie boyz. When we pick em up, dey run off ta da Snakebites anyway instead o' learnin how ta fight propa. But dey got squiggoths, an' every WAAAAGH needs really big killy tings. Snakebites wear brown, like a buncha zoggin' Amish folk.
* Da '''Bad Moonz''', what gotz lotsa teef 'cause dey grow faster den any other orks, so dey'z a buncha rich gits. 'at meanz dat dey's got da best squigs and dakka, but since dey'z such lazy gits, dey's [[Tau|no good at choppin' an' stompin']], so other orks can always just find a Bad Moon and stomp his teef out. Bad Moonz wear Yella, da color a big booms and shiny bits.
* '''Goffs''' are a buncha gloomy gits what don't ever have any fun and don't give a grot's toss about dakka, but dey'z somma da 'ardest of all da orks. [[Ghazghkull Mag Uruk Thraka]] himself wuz a Goff. Dats why he's so big, 'ard, an mean. Goffs wear black, da color a bein' DED 'ARD!
* Da '''Evil Sunz''''re all part a da Kult a Speed, and dey've got da most Meks, so dey're always muckin' about with teknowlogical equipment an speedy karts. Deyz big believas in da color red, cuz RED 'UNZ GO FASTA!
* '''Deffskullz''' are a buncha teevin', lootin' gits what'll grab anyfing <del>what's not nailed</del> if it's nailed down they'll loot the nails den loot da fing that was nailed down an' make it orky. [[Looted|Anyfing]]. Even in da middle of a scrap. Da mekz loves em, though, cuz nobody'z got more bitz and gubbinz than a Deffskull Loota. Deffskullz all seemz ta have some kinda technikal know-wotz, dough. Deffskullz wear da color Blue, cuz Blue's a lucky color.
* And, last of all but not least, dere's da '''Blud Axez'''. Dey're da ones what've been hangin' around da stinkin' humies fer ages too long, and gone and developed all sorts a un-orky tings like ''taktiks'' an' ''recownasense'' an' ''camo'flage'' an worse of all da magikal and feared cry of ''retreat''. Dey've even got a sayin' bout it: ''"If we runs for it, it don't count as losing, cuz we can also come back for anuvver go, see?"'' Dey'z mocked as cowardly gits by most of da boyz, but cause dey be dead cunning dey'z da main source of da best warbosses in WAAAAAAAGH! time (Next ta Da Prophet him self). An' its '''alwayz''' WAAAAAAAGH! time, ya git! Blud Axez wear cammerflage, but at least they paint it nice an' bright so's you can see'em coming.

Later, when da humies learned dat der was six Beasts, and each lead a lejun o Boyz, dey started tinking dat each o da Clanz were da rem-re-leftovers o each Beast's lejun.</ul>

===Ork Non-Klanz===
<ul style='color:green;font-size:100%'>
* Den dere's da '''[[Freebooterz|Freebootaz]]''', boyz wut left deir klan ta become merks an' piratz an' dat, Freebooterz iz often kicked o' deir klan for likin' sumtin' dat izn't violence more dan violence, like [[Kaptin Badrukk]] (teef), [[Wazdakka Gutsmek]] (goin' fast), or [[Zodgrod Wortsnagga]] (snotlings), but some leave o' deir own accord for similar reasons, like [[Kaptin Bluddflagg]] (loot). Freebootaz will even work for stupid 'umies for shinies (or hats), though dat don't mean dey won't turn 'round an 'ave a go at dem too.
* '''Feral Orkz''' are like Snakebites, but coz dey don't have a choice, what with not 'avin' access to Ork kulture seein' 'az dey don't have space travel. Often join the Snakebites as soon as dey'z recruited by a WAAAAAAGH.
* '''Speed Freekz''' is what you call da members o' da '''Kult o' Speed''', a klub any Ork what likes goin' fast a lot can join, not just da Evil Sunz.
</ul>

==Ork Daily Life==

[[File:Wh40k online concept.jpg|thumb|300px|right|Your average Ork home. Quite cozy when it comes down to it, really.]]

Morning.
GET UP! Doesn't matter when . But usually in the mid morning, -unless a nob kicks him in the face cause he is late for something, which he usually is. Next eat. Either the breakfast his pet grot brings him or the grot it self. Orks dont much care it all tastes the same dipped in mud and fried on a stick chased with some fungus beer.
Hit the drops. Yes the communal act of using the local bog. Literally. He might get a scar on his duff to show off if the Squigs are feisty that morning. Then swagger about and try to find new things to kill. Or new ways to kill things. This lasts till about noon.

Noon
LUNCH! Fungus rums and beers. Squig pies and mushroom fries. Plenty of fights break out at lunch usually from a loota stealing another Orks 'sweet-squig' dessert. Or some nob mouths off when drunk. Either way LUNCH! Next nap time/ wrekreation. Most Orks, having spent a very busy day trying to think up new ways to kill or new things to kill, will take a nap. Usually the average rank and file lad who has nothing better to do. It is around now that the more specialized Orkoids shall gather in their respective mobs and set about spending afternoon and early evening doing what they do best. Be it practicing blowing crap up if tankbustaz. Racing around the camp as speed freaks. Helping the meks if lootas or burnas. <strike>Hiding in plain sight if kommand-</strike> Move along, nofink to see 'ere.

Evening
WORK TIME! The boss or local big mek or Warp'ead bullies most every one around the camp center and gets up on his WAAAGH!!! Banner-tower and starts to bark out orders on what they will attack that night, or where they will hit to steal material to build his next projekt, or give a flashy psycho-pyrotectic light show during a prophetic chant. (though sometimes if no one got up till half past 5 they plan it during the early morning.) Depending on the Clan majority this can be as simple as "Smash dis!" (A goff) to "Ok Dis team needs ta be 'ere right when da rockets hit Or we wont-" <strike>(Yeah Blood axes dont know when to shut up) </strike> '''*THUMP*''' ZOGGIN' 'Umiez.

Midnight
DA ORKING HOUR! Do what was stated in the evening until they get tired and go home to bed. It don't count as failing cause they will try again tomorrow. Or pull it off and party all night (to the dismay of the defeated) until they pass out.

Even the Daily Life of the Ork is a miniature WAAAGH!!!

==Reasons it Rokks to be an Ork==
# We'z gotz a shiney new 7th ork-dition Codex-fingy!
# We'z da biggest an' da strongest.
# We'z made fer fightin' an' winnin'.
# We'z got more boyz dan anyone else.
# All an ork eva wantz to do fo'eva iz to keep fightin', winnin', an' lootin'.
# Dem mekboyz can loot anyfing an I mean [[Looted_Emperor|ANYFING]]!!
++''{{BLAM| Previous record has been made of note to Ordo Xenos for immediate actions to be taken. The Emperor Protects}}''++

Ummm, wot woz dat? Zog, I've lost count of da resuns for being an Ork!
# We'z already know everythin' wotz wort' learnin'.
# We'z da 2nd least [[grimdark]] race in da galaxy. BUT DA BEZT GREENDARK hur hur hur!
# Da painboyz can fix ya up right'n proppa, even if yer bloody 'ead'z chopped off.
# We'z got da shiniest bitz, or we'z 'bout to krump da git dat does.
# The longa ya fite, the bigga and stronga ya get.
# Teef's legal tenda. Punchin' sum git in da face getz youz a day'z meal.
# If da mekboy can finks it, he can build it.
# An' if he sayz it workz, he's roight.
# We'z da orkz an' dey iz not.
# Dem 'umiez and marine boyz screamin' "FER DA EMPRER", an dem spikey boys yellin' "BLOOD FO' DA BLOOD GOD!" is nofin' kompared to "WAAAAAAAAAGH!"
# Da red wunz will '''alwayz''' go fasta.
# Purple iz da sneekiest colah.
# Yello' iz da 'splodiest colah.
# Blu iz da lukiest colah.
# Green iz da orkiest colah.
# I haz a hole in me chest an' a choppa stuck to me leg? Didn' notice it while I wuz krumpin dem spiky boyz.
# Unlike dem 'umiez, greyskins, an' panzees, anyone can be a warboss usin' nofin' more den a choppa an' a litl bit o' dakka.
# Even if all da boyz get krump'd, we'z still win. Da only way da gits can zog us off is by [[Exterminatus|dakkain' da 'ole bludy planet]].
# You'z can trade in yer dakka fer moah choppa, or vice versah, and you iz still Orky enuff.
# You'z kan build an army of serial [[METAL BOXES|bawkses]] an' duk' tape an' maybe a bit o' spikez an' bitz and still look reel smart an' orky.
# Rolling a double six with Shokk Attack Gun.
# Some Git shootz 90% of Your squad, but the Nob smackz one boy on the 'ead and everybody iz doing good.
# You'z kan talk legally like a retard.
# Giving da boyz a frying pan on the 'ead and a fender on the shoulda makes dem 'arder.
# Putting dem in a fridge makez dem mega'ard.
# You'z kan use every armiez gunz, but none kan use Yourz.
# If you die you get proppa afterlife wiz lotta fighnin' an' booze, instead of being raped by laffin' daemons for eternity.
# Youz don't havta Hate everfink dat's not a Ork.
# You WILL die of laffin' if You play orkz.
# Eiff Edishun iz da horde edishun! We'z can field more boyz dan dem 'humies or bug fingies!
# Lastly, an' most importantly, da mane reezun it rokkz ta be an Ork iz dis:
WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


==Reasons it sucks to be an Ork==
# You're the one species that is actually dumber than humanity. <strike>{{BLAM|HERESY!}}</strike> *THUMP* LOK BOSS I GOT MEH WUN UH DEM UMIES!!!!
# Your war cry "WAAAGH!" is overused by everyone. LIEK IF "FOR DA EMPRAH!!!" IZN'T OVERUZZED AZ 'ELL
# No matter how hard you try, you will never achieve enough dakka... and if you did, it'd end up destroying you too. A TRAGGADY, DAT IS!
# Despite having some awesome-looking guns, you can't shoot things for shit. Your standard Ballistic Skill is 2 (which means at best hitting things on a 5+), and when you ''do'' shoot somebody successfully it's probably due to sheer volume of bullets more than anything else. YOU SAY DAT LOIKE IT'S A FUKKEN BAD THING! 
# Your sole purpose in stories is to distract the Space Marines and the Imperial Guard from more dangerous threats like Chaos, Tyranids or Necrons. BUT WE'Z GET TA HAVE A REAL GREAT FIGHT WHILEZ BEIN' A DISTRAKSHUN. SO IT'Z STILL ALL GOOD. ALSO HAV YOU EVEN READ DA BEAST ARISES WE ZOG DEM HUMMIES UP. 
# Your army falls apart at the seams the minute your Warboss dies. NAH, WE'S JUST GOT TA FIGURA' OUT WHUZ IN CHARGE NEXT, DAN WE COMES BACK AROUND TA FUMP EM AGAIN! <strike> Hiss! By that time we've NOMNOMNOMNOM'D on you </strike> '''*CRUNCH*''' ANUDDA 'EAD FER ME POINTY STIKK!
# Anytime you use anything, from your smallest pistol to your [[Battlefleet Gothic|largest space ship]], you have the same chances of surviving its use as a grot snuggling an overcharged standard issue Imperial [[Plasma Weapons|Plasma Gun]]. Offset by the fact you can survive 4th degree burns, decapitation, being septic, and acquiring space tetanus. OY, DOK. WUTZ DIS TETANATHINGY? CAN WE'Z SQUISH ET?
# In Second Ed there was an alarming risk that your entire army might die before the battle actually started because almost no Ork units had sealed armour. ORKZ DUN' NEED ARMER! NOT WEN ORKZ GOT DAKKA!! SMASH DEM GITS WITOUT'IT!
# You have a mushroom and two spore pods dangling between your legs, and Kroot find it a delicacy. <strike> GOOD MEAT BAKKAWW! </strike> *THUMP* I DUNNO WUT DIS DUN SAID BUT IT URT ME EYES SO I KRUMPED IT!!!!
# You're part of [[Squad broken]]. WELL, UH... ZOGGIT. WE GOT NUFFIN CLEVA TA SAY BOUT DAT. MAYBE SUMFING ABOUT IT BEING MADE BY DEM NECKBEARDED GROTZ WIV DA FEDORAZ AN STUFF
# <strike>You haven't had a new codex since 4th edition. And it's starting to show.</strike> SHUT IT YA GIT, WE'ZE DA ORKS AND YOU'Z A BUNCH O PANSY GITS! B'SIDES, WE IZ GOING TA GET NEW CODEX DIS 6TH ED! OI BOSS WEZ GOT A SEVENF EDISHUN CODEX BEFORE THE PANSY GITS DID! N NOW WE'Z GOTZ A SHINEY NEW 7 ORK-DITION CODEX-FINGY! ZOGGIN' GORK! DIS EYFF EDISHUN KODEX IS DED KILLY! 
# <strike>There is a slight chance that [[Matt Ward|Mattard]] is going to write 6th edition codex. If so, in the next codex you'll read something like this: "The Orks insatiable thirst for violence is, really, just a way of coping with the angst they feel that no matter what they do, they will never be Ultramarines."</strike> WHO KEEPS LETTIN' DEZ' HUMIES IN 'ERE! WE'Z BLOODY INFESTED! GET DA BURNAZ! <strike>(Also [[Matt Ward|Mattard]] is apparently too busy with pestering Forge world for more Space marine resin collections to be converted into plastic for the main product line to be bothered with our humble bumbling green skins.)</strike> Tipakill 'umie bee'ayevyohr dat iz. Alwayz ignorin' da orky fingz in loif an' only payin' attentchuhn to zoggin' 'umie fingz. Downroight shaymfol dat iz. Da onlee REEL orky 'umie dere iz iz dat Kaptuhn Yarik; Gork - or eh, iz it Mork? - bless 'iz 'eart. (Trust us greenskin, Matt Ward ignoring you is a good thing.) But waznt 'e fired fur being an annoying grot? I GOT DA BURNAZ!! WE HAVIN A BBQ?? MAKE MINE CRISPY AN DUN FORGET DA EXTRA SQUIG SAUCE
# Orks do not draw psychic power from the [[Warp]], [[Derp|but still take Perils of the Warp]]. DEM WEIRDBOY GITZ JUST ORK'D TOO 'ARD!
# <strike>if dere ain't any Stormboyz, yer army k'n get krumped by da Blu Gitz real easy like. No not [[Ultramarines|DEM]] blue gits The [[Tau|udda ones]] wif da nice dakka and puny stompas.</strike>'''*CRUNCH*''' OI! WHO LET DA GROT DO DA TALKIN?! WE JUS' SMASH DEM BLUEBOYZ WIT 'ARE CHOPPAS WHEN WE GET CLOSE, AN' IF DAT DON'T WORK WE JUST MATCH DERE AMOUNT OF DAKKA WIT SOME PRETTY KILLY SHOOTAS. UNLESS DEY SEND DA RED COMMIT THO... GOOD FING DEY GOT RID OF HIM!
# Even doh dere is [[Yarrick|wun humie]] dat foights good and ard and iz real ded killy, ee iz da greatest enemy ov da Orkz. *THUNK* DA GREATEST ENNEMY OF DA ORKS IZ DA RED COMMIT! DAT BLUE BOY'S STOMPA IS FREE TIMES FASTA DAN A REGULAR WUN!
# <strike>You probably dont have a penis. You can piss on Space Marines, only to die a short while later.</strike> IZ DAT BAD FING? OOMIEZ SAYZ DAT IT VERY HURTZ WHEN WE 'IT EM IN IT? Wait... Dat what dey call the mushroom'n'spore pods? Poor suckas! Dey have PAIN nerves down dat way? No WONDER dey scream so bad when we kick em there. 
#<strike>Even (some) vegetarians will eat you</strike> NOT IF WE EAT DEM FIRST! HAH! 
# You all piss yourselves at the very mention of the name of a certain [[Farsight|Red Armored Swordsman]]. WE'Z JUST BE SO EXCITED CAUSE DAT BLUE-BOY ACTUALLY PUTS UP A FIGHT! More so than the Orks did against an old Ethereal with a pointed stick! *KRUMP* SHUT IT YA GREAT LANKY BLUE GROT 

== See Also ==
* [[Grot]]
* [[Snotling]]
* [[The Beast]]
* [[The War of The Beast]]
* [[Ghazghkull Mag Uruk Thraka]]
* [[Gorgutz_%27Ead_%27Unter|Warboss Gorgutz 'Ead 'Unter]]
* [[Deffboss]]
* [[WAAAGH]]
* [["Da Tragedy of Hamlet, boss of Denmark" by Shake-da-boss-pole]]
* [[Makbeff]]
* [[Warhammer 40,000/Tactics/Orks(7E)|Tactics/Orks]]
* [[Warhammer_40,000/Tactics/Orks/Dred_List|Dreadnought List]]
* [[Codex Orks: Space Odin Edition]]
* [[Ork Gunz]]
* [[Gargant]]
* [[Stompa]]
* [[Deff Skwadron]]
* [[Scraplootas]]
* [[Da Chopshop]]
* [[Ork Trek]]
* [[Ironjawz]] for one of their Age of Sigmar counterparts.
* [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=whxcq4I0kAo Da Ork Song]
* [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JXCLtD5batc Dem Ork Boyz Song]

==Gallery==
<center><gallery>
Image:Ork flowchart.png|WAAAAGH flowchart
Image:WAAAAGH.jpg|WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH
Image:Ork_WTF_is_this.jpg|WOT'Z DAT
Image:Orks_are_made_4_rokkin.jpg|ORKZ IZ DA ROKKINEST
Image:WOT_DA_ZOG.jpg|DA PAINBOSS IZ GONNA WANT TA LOOK AT DIS WOTEVA IT IS
Image:Disguise_1.jpg|Orks are the best at disguises
Image:Disguise_2.jpg|Stoopid [[beakie|beakies]]
Image:Disguise_3.jpg|Weeabork
Image:Orktaku.jpg|A different sort of Weeabork
Image:Samurork4.jpg|The truest of Weeaborks
Image:Da_warboss_Lincoln.jpg|The assassination of warboss Lincoln.
Image:GorknMork.jpg|Gork and Mork
Image:Ork_Fortress.jpg|WE'Z AMUZED BY ENTIRE PUNY 'UMIE IMPERIUM
Image:Pimp_Ork_1.jpg|PompadOrk
Image:Pimp_Ork_2.jpg|EY YOU GITZ WE 'EARD YOU LIKE TA MAKE IT ORKY SO WE ORKYFIED YER ORKY SQUIGOFF SO YOU'Z CAN WAAAGH WHILE YOO'Z WAAAGHIN'
Image:Killskata.jpg|Jet Grind RadiOrk
Image:Gorkken_Morkann_by_Jaekyu.jpg|'OO DA 'ELL DO YA FINK WE IS?!!!
Image:Finking_wiz_siantz_2.jpg|IT'Z TIME FER SUM IKSPERIMINTS
Image:Ork_teaparty.jpg|No reason we can't be civil
Image:Finking_wiz_siantz.jpg|SIANTZ. It works.
Image:Oldboyz.jpg|Oldboyz can Waaagh! too. They just need a nap afterwords.
Image:Orkpoke.jpg|SlowpOrk
Image:Ork_Anatomy.jpg|Inaccurate (but in-universe) depiction of orky gubbinz.
Image:Orkspekta_gubbinz.jpg|Orkspekta Gubbinz iz on da case!
Image:Orkishbeprepared.jpg|<strike>Jeremy Irons is orky, right?</strike> COURZE 'E IZ! E'Z ZO ORKY YOU'Z CAN'T LISTEN TA DA ORIGINAL SONG WIWOUT 'EARING DIS!
Image:Green.jpg|Supagreen
Image:1229746903774.jpg|[[Deff Skwadron]]. Zoggin' bootiful.
Image:Proud'n'Bootiful.jpg
Image:1239594444871.jpg|Transform and WAAAGH! (Holyshit this thing actually transforms.)
Image:1258887158852.jpg| Essentially....this is the best thing ever.
Image:mythbusta.jpg
Image:Ork_love_potion.jpg|Love Can WAAAGH!
Image:Ork with Lego shootah.jpg
Image:Squig_drops.jpg
Image:Eldars_are_orky.jpg|[[Eldar]]z iz da most orky race evar, ya gitz!
Image:Ork Powuz.png|An alternate explanation of how a WAAAGH works.
File:Mork and gork orks warhammer 40k 1334752549083.jpg|Brutally cunning or cunningly brutal?
File:CoDorks.jpg|Only Orks are capable of making something utterly godawful into something completely Orky.
File:SmurfOrks.jpg|Orks, mastaz uf stelff'en
File:Bork_Kube.jpg|A viable Ork space ship design
</gallery></center>

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[[category:Warhammer 40,000]][[Category:Orks]]
[[Category: Xenos]]