Editing Paragon Warsuit

{{WTF}}

{{Fail}}

[[File:Paragon_Warsuit.jpg|300px|right|thumb|Looks like the [[Dreadknight]] had a daughter the whole time.]]

{{topquote|If its out time to die, it's our time.  All I ask is, if we have to give these bastards our lives, ''WE GIVE THEM HELL BEFORE WE DO IT!!!|Matrix Revolutions}}

Urgh...where the fuck do we begin with this bucket of doozy.

The Paragon Warsuit is a new unit released on our virgin eyes on January 2021. A device that straddles the line between [[Power Armour]] and [[Battlesuit|Mecha]], the Paragon Warsuit has garnered...well...let's just say that we have now a metric fuck ton of [[Meme]]s now.

== WTF Am I Looking At!? ==

The thing you seeing here is the new [[Sisters of Battle]] elite unit. This abomination is the first new sister unit since 2003 and it seem to carry on the Imperium's glorious tradition of [[Derp|strapping a fucking baby carrier and pushing them onto the front lines.]] Seriously, what the fuck is up with GW's habit of giving the Imperium fucking baby carriers? First we had the [[Dreadknight]], then the [[Invictor Tactical Warsuit]] and now ''this''. Thanks to this fiasco, we can finally conclude that the design of the Dreadknight may not be [[Matt Ward]]'s fault after all, go on our [[Spiritual Liege]], you're redeemed for now on this case.

And yes we did not have a typo up there. Ask any <s>Beardy</s> Matronly sisters of battle player and they will tell you the sisters of battle have never been one of game workshops favored armies and have over the years received very little support. As such from the Witch Hunter codex released in 2003 the Sisters of battle have not had '''one''' totally new codex option not counting the [[Repressor]], which was forge world not base codex, or special characters. Even the 2020 release had only [[Zephyrim Squad|Zephyrim]] and [[Mortifier|Mortifiers]] as new units, and both were variants of existing units, the [[Seraphim Squad|Seraphim]] and [[Penitent Engine]] respectively. As such the Paragon Warsuit is the first 100% original, not based on any existing unit so-we-can-sell-two-unit-kits option in the sisters line up in almost two decades. . .and. . .look at it.

As you know, ''everyone'' and I mean <u>'''''everyone'''''</u> [[EPIC FAIL|has taken the piss out of this thing.]] From comparisons to either the infamous Dreadknight or Ellen Ripley's loader suit in Aliens, to [[Neckbeard]]s [[Nurgle|projectile vomiting]] on the horrendous design choices such as ''where'' the Sister's feet is meant to go, and even folks [[Lulz|laughing their asses off]] over the fact that after decades of SoB players bitching for new armor, they finally got it in the form of a discount [[FAIL|Centurion warsuit.]]

Suffice to say, this literal walking ergonomic nightmare has become the butt of jokes at the Sisters' expense. [[Khornate Knights|But at least both Sisters and Grey Knight players could finally find something to bond over.]]

The funny thing is that, if GW wanted to give the sororitas some form of heavy support, they could have just gone for other, more plausible options. We do know that regular humans can don terminator armour, we have many examples of inquisitors doing just that, and considering how wealthy the Ecclesiarchy is, getting a special body of terminator-clad SoBs wouldn't be that implausible, even if they don't have the advantage of a black carapace. Another option would be a dreadnought-like design, and while that sounds absurd at first, we have the precedent of SoB dreadnoughts from the Rogue Trader days. Hell, they wouldn't have to go that far, they could use some sort of warsuit akin to the [[Invictor Tactical Warsuit]] that functioned as a dreadnought while being piloted by a regular battle sister. . . I mean that is what the Pargon is really, it just got some design issues that made us laugh like the sister's ostrich legs and that silly little left arm. 

So really they would have, you know, just design the warsuit better. Additionally this is part of an annoying trend for GW to force exo-arms on something, which have always been ugly and never looked good.

The Paragon is ''so'' silly that even the ''Regimental Standard'' [https://regimental-standard.com/2021/06/23/5-reasons-why-a-sentinel-is-the-only-warsuit-you-really-need/ pokes fun at it], comparing it very unfavorably to the [[Sentinel]]. It says a lot that some of the [[Imperial Guard|biased]] points they make are actually legitimately valid, such as the fact that there’s no risk of dropping a Sentinel’s weapons in combat when they’re bolted to the chassis itself, and that (Armoured) Sentinel pilots have actual head protection; proving that the Paragon is so stupidly designed that not even blatant Imperial propaganda (or GW itself) can defend it.

On top of everything else, as many of the more [[/m/|/M/anly]] members of /tg/ has commented, it looks like a discount [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Landmate Landmate], from Shirow Masamune's works.

==Equipment==
In terms of what these glorified flamingo walkers lug around, the Paragon Warsuit is equipped with firepower to rival a [[Space Marine]] [[Dreadnought]]. Their left arm incorporates a [[Heavy Bolter]], [[Heavy Flamer]], or [[Multi-Melta]] which is augmented by shoulder-mounted secondary weapons consisting of either twin [[Grenade Launcher]]s or [[Storm Bolter]]s. Its right arm wields a melee weapon consisting of a large [[Power weapon#Paragon War Blade|Paragon War Blade]] or [[Power weapon#Paragon War Mace|Paragon War Mace]]. Now, it looks stupid, but if it reaches melee, the poor idiots who failed to bring it down are quite screwed.

== Gallery ==

<gallery>

10hcsed7rcd61.jpg|GW's fetish with baby carriers truly mystifies us.

Sister of Bulk.jpg|Some anons quick photoshop proves that even [[/tg/]] knows how to make better models than [[GW]].

2f67q4lpy4d61.jpg

04xummq71cd61.jpg|HONK HONK!

B2c90rhhb7d61.jpg|Truly indomitable. Bet you can't unsee that now.

F71ilq7so9d61.jpg|Trust us, you don't wannna know.

Go70xetry3d61.png|Even [[Eldrad]] is in agreement. This shit makes the [[Eldar War Walker]] look good.

F90caierz8d61.png| Original character, donut steel.

Gthko9kn44d61.jpg

Tt2f04tkv3d61.jpg|Yeah its basically the Loader from Aliens but all 40k'ed.

Up16qesw55d61.jpg|The baby carrier's baby carrier.

I am your father.jpeg

Csylvtsdu3e61.jpg|Cheeki Breeki edition...

Sob-dreadnought.jpg|...And suddenly grimdark fanart explanation.

Patrick-star-paragon.png|Dem legs.

Kawaiigon-warsuit.jpg|Emprah knows how much kitbashing [https://1d4chan.org/wiki/Sisters_of_Battle#Painting_pretty_Sisters_of_Battle_faces_.28so_they_don.27t_look_like_manly_marines.29 and painting skill will take] to achieve this, we are not sure if they have a back-exoskeleton, use special fibers or those are cybernetic arms, and we can skip over the mechanized high-heels.

Kawaiigon-model.jpg|We leave to the skillful and elegan/tg/entlemen this grand challenge of kitbash and painting.

morvenn_vahl.jpg|And of course [[Morvenn Vahl|the new major character]] has to be in one. At least the personal one looks decent.

</gallery>

[[Category: Warhammer 40,000]]

[[Category: Imperial]]

[[Category: Sisters of Battle]]

[[Category: Vehicles]]

[[Category: Walkers]]

[[Category: FAIL]]

{{Sisters-of-Battle}}

{{40k-Imperial-Vehicles}}

{{40k-Armor}}