Editing Ultramarines

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[[Image:UltramarinesRT.jpg|thumb|right|Fig.1.1: A Smurf.]]
The '''Ultramarines''' are a chapter of [[Space Marines]], probably the most famous and well-known (both within the [[Warhammer 40,000]] universe and without). [[Games Workshop]] considers the Ultramarines their chapter of choice, and the Ultramarines represent the standard upon which most other Space Marine chapters are based. They have an easily recognisable blue-with-gold-trim colour scheme - the blue colouration, coupled with the small size of the minis, has lead them to be nicknamed "Smurfs" by some. A squad of Ultramarines are the protagonists of the recently released 40k-based move (coincidentally titled "Ultramarines").
[[Image:Ultramarines.jpg|thumb|right|Cockmongler and Happy Negro, the typical Ultramarines .]]

The [[Primarch]] of the Ultramarines was [[Roboute Guilliman]], and it was he who wrote the famous Codex Astartes after the events of the [[Horus Heresy]], prescribing each Space Marine chapter to a mere thousand warriors to ensure that no one man would ever command the loyalty of a entire Space Marine legion again. Many, but not all, of the other Space Marine legions adopted the Codex and split up into multitudes of smaller chapters, and most Space Marine chapters today follow the practices found within it. Because they are an extremely successful and well-established chapter, and their gene-seed remains remarkably pure, it is the variety most commonly used to found new Space Marine chapters. Roboute Guilliman himself was mortally wounded by a poisonous attack from the traitor Primarch [[Fulgrim]], and he has been kept in stasis by the Ultramarines for thousands of years, where many claim that his wound is slowly healing (which is technically impossible, but you never know).

The Ultramarines are a very popular chapter in the general 40k fandom, but are widely hated by many denizens of [[/tg/]]. This may initially have been due to their popularity - the Space Marines in general suffer something of a backlash from fa/tg/uys because of their overwhelming popularity with the annoying young children that infest the hobby, and the Ultramarines are the most popular of them all - but of recent editions the blatant favouritism displayed by certain Games Workshop writers towards the chapter have earned them considerable ire, especially from fans of other Space Marine chapters that get slagged off in the process. This is mainly the fault of [[Matthew Ward]], responsible for the latest Ultramarines codex, which is full of ridiculous fanboyism and claims that every chapter strives to be like the Ultramarines and that the ones who don't are clearly aberrants who are dying out (this certainly comes as news to chapters like the [[Black Templars]] and [[Space Wolves]], who were doing perfectly fine the last time they checked).

Unfortunately for the Ultramarines, some aspects of their history from earlier editions are fairly well entrenched and can't really be changed now. This includes Roboute Guilliman falling hook, line and sinker for a diversionary trick that took him and the Ultramarines to the opposite side of the galaxy when Horus decided to launch his rebellion at Terra, and the entire Ultramarines 1st Company being wiped out by [[Tyranid]]s during a holding action in the Battle of Macragge. Had Mat Ward been responsible for writing these parts of history, they'd probably have seen right through the clumsy deceptions of the traitor legions and had Roboute Guilliman himself show up to save the Emperor after Horus mortally wounded him, and had a Terminator squad single-handedly hold off the entirety of the Tyranid siege on Macragge.

==In Bygone Days==
[[Image:Ultraknights.jpg|thumb|left|Ultrmarines, from the days of [[Awesome]].]]
[[User Talk:Jaimas|This]] grizzled [[Neckbeard]] recalls a time when they weren't retarded or hated. 

Before the time of stupid - before [[Matt Ward]].

There was an actual fanbase for this chapter once, one that once held deep reverence for the Ultramarines - not because of idiotic Matt Ward fluff, but because they were honest-to-goodness "Joe Everyman" heroes on the battlefield. Many players who stuck with Marines got their start with the Ultramarines, and there was ample fluff of the chapter taking its lumps and fighting on, like men - Maccrage, Black Reach, and more. Hell, even [[Dawn of War|Winter Assault]] harkened back to these simpler times, back when the Ultramarines were worthy of respect and whilst /tg/ simply disliked them before, it was mostly because of the population of newblets that arrived, and not because the [[fluff]] was [[Derp|retarded]] and portrayed them as SECOND TO TEH [[Emprah|EMPRAH]]. Armies like Matt Hudson's were examples of what an actually ''good'' Ultramarines group with deep fluff centered around every victory and loss could be like. Players reminisced over the Ultras because they were, for many, their starting army for 40K.

There was a time where the Ultramarines were frankly more human, showing both the strengths and weaknesses of humanity all the stronger. They lost members to Chaos, and groups of their forces undertook penitence crusades. There was battles they lost, such as against the [[Necron]]s. They held Maccrage, but with a staggering toll in lives. They defeated the [[Alpha Legion]], but fell prey to the trap set by said legion and paid the price for Guilliman's hubris, something that Guilliman himself felt immense guilt for. They were ''fallible'' before Matt Ward got involved, and they were more characterful for it, as it made their victories ''that much more inspiring''.

The Ultramarines players that actually existed before Matt Ward were rarely given much more than mild indifference from /tg/ in the past. There is thus no one who hates their fluff in the new edition more than those who were long-term fans and players of the Ultramarines. Matt Ward's fluff was ''so'' bad, in fact, that it caused players to abandon the Ultras in favor of other Marine chapters, such as the [[Imperial Fists]], [[Salamanders]], and [[Raven Guard]] (the latter of which Matt Ward seems to have [[Butthurt|a personal vendetta against]]). Other players were so alienated that they either turned to [[Chaos]] or stopped playing Marines entirely.

[[Matt Ward|Thus is the hatred brought about by the hubris of one man]].

==Quotes to Rage By==
{{MattWard}}
[[File:Cato Sicarius.jpg|300px|right|thumb|One of the Ultramarines few shining moments of Awesome, an extrordinary rarity since the begining of the Ward Era.]]
"Chapters [not descended from Guilliman's geneseed] are disciples who owe their genetic inheritance to another Primarch, but follow the Codex Astartes as keenly as their divergent heritage allows. While primarily composed of successor Chapters, this group also includes several Chapters of the First Founding - notably the Imperial Fists, White Scars and the Raven Guard. These chapters can never be Ultramarines, for their gene-seed is not that of Roboute Guilliman. Nevertheless, they will ever aspire to the standards and teachings of the great Primarch.

[Chapters who do not emulate the Ultramarines] are aberrants; chapters who, through quirk of gene-seed, mutation or stubbornness, eschew the Codex Astartes in favor of other structural and combat doctrines. Some, such as the Blood Angels and their successors, strive to be worthy of Guilliman's legacy, but their recalcitrant gene-seed drives them ever further from it. Others, such as the Space Wolves and the Black Templars, remain stubbornly independent, looking to their own founder's ways of war and caring little of how they fare in the eyes of others. These aberrant Chapters were always few in number and their presence diminishes with each passing decade, for their gene-seed is no longer the source of fresh Chapters." - Matt Ward, Ultramarines player, codex writer (unfortunately). (Also note that the Black Templars actually outnumber the Ultramarines at a ratio of at least 6:1)

"Trust me, somewhere deep in the Eye of Terror, the Blood God himself weeps alone in the dark, for he knows in his heart of hearts: no matter what he may do, no matter what incomparable feats he may accomplish, no matter how infinite and unfathomable his glory...he can never be an Ultramarine." - Calgar, Chapter Master of the Ultramarines.

"This wouldn't be a problem if Horus was an Ultramarine. You know it's true." - The God Emperor of Mankind, remarking to Sanguinius during the Horus Heresy.

"My company and I alone have more victories and battle honors than do the entirety of other individual chapters!" - Cato Sicarius, captain of the Ultramarines 2nd company.

"Don't you know it? A shining battalion of Ultramarines, high on every wall around the palace, fought the unwashed hordes who dared to attack the Imperium. When The Emperor and Guilliman went to fight Horus they found the poor man had painted his armor blue and had glued horse shoes to his pauldrons. The Emperor was mortally wounded, but Horus had been no match for Guilliman. Sanguinius, who was also there, killed himself out of shame, realizing then that he would never be an Ultramarine." - A modestly confused historian.

"I am indeed so proficient at my work as a scout sergeant that other chapters borrow me to train their own scouts." - Torias Telion, scout sergeant of the Ultramarines.

"I am positively and undeniably the most gifted of all tank commanders in the entire Imperium.  This is not a statement of arrogance, but rather one of verifiable fact." - Antaro Chronus, tank commander of the Ultramarines.

"Eldrad Ulthran voluntarily sacrificed himself to Slaanesh, for he had finally foreseen that even had they struggled for all eternity, the Eldar would never be the equals of Ultramarines, nor could they ever fully grasp the glorious legacy of Roboute Guilliman. Any torment She Who Thirsts could conceive would pale in comparison to living with this horrible truth, and in the end, maybe Slaanesh would take pity on the Eldar since she, too, shares the pain of never being able to reach the shining peak of superiority that are the true Sons of Guilliman." - An unidentified farseer of Craftworld Ulthwé.

"I have pierced the mind-crippling veil of the Hive Mind and can foresee their intents with such accuracy that many suspect only the Emperor Himself could have attained such a feat. It is without question that I am uniquely the most powerful psyker in the entire galaxy, perhaps even as powerful as the Emperor." - Varro Tigurius, librarian of the Ultramarines.

"In truth, Hive Fleet behemoth attacked ultramar because the Tyranid Hive mind wanted to become an Ultramarine and accept Roboute Guilliman as it's spiritual liege and Chapter Master Calgar as it's temporal master.  When it was turned down, it attacked in hopes of consuming Ultramarine geneseeds to become one of us...but deep down it knew that it could never become an Ultramarine." - Chaplain Varnus.  

"I single-handedly, casually, and easily bested a Bloodthirster of Khorne in hand to hand combat and sent it screaming back into the warp; other chapters would need to send an entire company of assault marines to have the smallest hope of defeating such a beast in close combat." - Chaplain Varnus.

"I was not a tactical genius. My Legion should follow another primarch instead and aspire to his teachings more than my own. My only regret is that thanks to my inferior gene-seed my sons can never be true Ultramarines." - Jagatai Khan, primarch of the White Scars.

"I supported the codex reformation from the beginning out of respect for Roboute Guilliman, who is my spiritual liege. Since my own knowledge of warfare is severely lacking I was overjoyed when my Legion was given the opportunity to learn from a more competent general's experience. My only regrets are that we, rather than they, were charged with protecting Terra, and that thanks to my inferior gene-seed my sons can never be true Ultramarines." -Rogal Dorn, primarch of the Imperial Fists.

"I may be one of the greatest of primarchs, warmaster, Imperium destabilizing traitor, embodiment of the ruinous powers. Yet even I have to admit that my dear brother Guilliman is clearly superior in every way. Hell... I specifically orchestrated the events of this treason so that the Ultramarines are on the other side of the galaxy. Why? Not because I knew they'd trounce us all within mere moments - which they would - but because the entire purpose of my actions was to weaken the Imperium just enough so that my brother, o prestigious Guilliman, could impose his superior ideology over our brethren. I knew I could never live up to his name, so I gave it up all for him, for you, my brother!" - Horus, primarch of the Luna Wolves/Sons of Horus. 

"You jealous little people just don't know what it's like to be so faithful, awesome, and praised by the Emperor! The rules for fighting against my chapter invented proper strategy, and then we wrote a proper book on strategy to show those bitches how it's done! Get a job!" - Roboute Guilliman, during an address to the stunned citizens of Ultramar.

"Indeed, it was Guilliman who would have the greatest lasting effect upon the now leaderless Blood Angels. Through the Codex Astartes - that great treatise on the restructuring and ordering of the Space Marines - Guilliman's legacy would reshape the Blood Angels Legion into the Chapters that defend the Imperium to this day." - Matt Ward, Ultramarines player, codex writer.

"[The Ultramarines] are one of the hardest working chapters out there... The Ultramarines are the most focused, proficient, and tactically aware force in the galaxy..." - Matt Ward, Ultramarines player, codex writer.

"The Ultramarines are undoubtedly the best Space Marines ever. Yes, really! Thanks to the heritage of Guilliman and their myriad heroic deeds, the Ultramarines are the exemplars of the Space Marines. With a few fringe exceptions... all Space Marine chapters want to be like the Ultramarines and recognize Marneus Calgar as their spiritual liege." - Matt Ward, Ultramarines player, codex writer.

==History of the Ultramarines==
The Ultramarines have some of the most boring 1st founding histories for any Astartes Chapter in the Imperial history. 

Circa M29: The Unification Wars. The Emperor of Mankind unites Terra, and sets off to conquer the stars in a series of violent and bloody battles. The Ultramarines’ Primarch, Roboute Guilliman (Nicknamed Rowboat Girlyman for being an utter twat during the Heresy), is conveniently located on the other side of the galaxy when this occurs. 

012.M31-014.M31: The Horus Heresy. Almost half of all [[Space Marine]] legions [[heresy|betray]] the [[Emperor]] and turn to [[Chaos]]. The traitors lay siege to Holy Terra, and most of the Space marine legions suffer major losses. The [[Blood Angels]], [[Imperial Fists]], and [[White scars]] are forced to make a stand on Terra while the [[Dark Angels]] lose their homeworld to <s>renegade elements within their home planet</s>A COMPLETELY RANDOM ACCIDENT AND NOT HERESY, the [[Salamanders]], [[Iron Hands]], and [[Raven Guard]] are nearly destroyed, and the [[Emperor]] is crippled while battling Horus. The Ultramarines are conveniently located on the other side of the galaxy when this occurs. After the Heresy, Rowboat Girlyman created the Codex Astartes as we know it today, including the separation of the 10,000 strong legions into 1,000 strong chapters. Note that the Ultramarines didn't participate in the defense of Terra, didn't sustain crippling damage to their Chapter's manpower, and note that, best of all, when they arrived they were too fucking late. The war was already won, yet their primarch still was the first to create the new rules.

546.M32: 'The Beheading': The High Lords of Terra are all slain on the orders of Drakan Vangorich, Grand Master of the Officio Assassinorum. The rogue Master of Assassins is tracked down and slain by a [[Space Marine]] strikeforce drawn from the Imperial Fists, Halo Brethren and Sable Swords. Only a single [[Space Marine]] survives the campaign. The Ultramarines are conveniently located on the other side of the galaxy when this occurs. 

843.M35: Distress call from Grendel's World investigated. Planet discovered to have been attacked and all inhabitants slain by terror tactics of the Night Lords. The Ultramarines are conveniently located on the other side of the galaxy when this occurs.

Early M36: The Age of Apostasy and the Reign of Blood begin. Warp storms increase dramatically and [[Chaos]] and [[Ork]] attacks multiply. The Imperium falls into turmoil. An empowered Ecclesiarchy becomes more tyrannical. High Lord Goge Vandire becomes the most powerful member of the Senate of the High Lords of Terra, and manipulates a small sect, the Daughters of the Emperor(AKA: today the [[Sisters of Battle]]), into becoming his personal bodyguards, the Brides of the [[Emperor]]. Vandire rules largely unopposed and more and more bloody and tyrannical. Zhoros (Fire Hawks' world) thermal bombed. The Ultramarines are conveniently located on the other side of the galaxy when this occurs.

266.M36: Sebastian Thor is born on Dimmamar. He eventually becomes a threat to Vandire, who sends the Frateris Templar fleet to destroy Dimmamar. The fleet is completely destroyed by a warp storm, still existing today, named the Storm of the Emperor's Wrath in the Clax system. Vandire's armies are finally defeated by combined forces of the Tech Guard and several chapters of [[Space Marines]], organized under the banner of the Confederation of Light, led by Thor. Vandire is executed by Alicia Dominica, the leader of his own bodyguards, who reclaim their old name Daughters of the [[Emperor]] in a conspiracy involving the Adeptus Custodes and the [[Emperor]] himself. The Ultramarines are conveniently located on the other side of the galaxy when this occurs.

723.M36: The 5th Black Crusade begins. Doombreed, a prince of [[Khorne]] declares war on the Adeptus Astartes. The Warhawks and the Venerators are lost. The Ultramarines are conveniently located on the other side of the galaxy when this occurs. 

995.M40-000.M41 The Macharian Crusades. Lord Solar Macharius sets out to reconquer the Segmentum Pacificus for the [[Imperium]]. The Ultramarines are conveniently located on the other side of the galaxy when this occurs.

444.M41: First War for Armageddon. Chaos incursion led by Angron and World Eaters beaten back by [[Space Wolves]] and [[Grey Knights]] but only at a terrible cost. Only about a dozen of the grey knights survive the battle with Angron. The local planetary militia and the other citizens are [[Grimdark|mind-wiped, sterilized and put into work camps, to slave away for the rest of their short, miserable lives]] much to the horror of Logan Grimnar. The Ultramarines are conveniently located on the other side of the galaxy when this occurs.

742.M41 Damocles Crusade is launched against the Tau Empire due to the Imperium's ever growing Xenophobia, a small, strategically insignificant piece of nothingness, inhabited by weak fish people with minimal Faster-Than-Light Technology. The Ultramarines are thoroughly defeated along with the rest of the Imperial forces. Those "aberrants" known as the Black Templars come in and beat the hell out of the Tau after the Ultramarines leave for the:
 
745.M41: First Tyrannic War. Hive Fleet Behemoth attacks the Ultramarines' homeworld, Macragge. Most of the chapter is eaten by [[Nids]] and lost their entire 1st company, the Chapter's company of hardened veterans and Terminators. The second fight they get and they still blew it, lulz.

901-912.M41 Badab War. The Astral Claws, Lamenters, Executioners, and Mantis Warriors chapters rebel against the [[Imperium]], and are defeated by loyalist chapters. The Ultramarines are conveniently located on the other side of the galaxy when this occurs.

941-942.M41: Second War for Armageddon. The Ultramarines bump into an [[Ork]] Waaagh! while running away from the Tyranids. They are saved by the timely intervention of [[Commissar Yarrick]] and the [[Blood Angels]]. 

988.M41: The battle of Rynn's World begins. A large ork army, led by the Warboss Snagrod attacks the Crimson Fists and their homeworld. During the battle, a stray missile strikes the Fortress-Monastery of the crimson fists, killing most of the Marines. The survivors are wounded severely and are forced to rebuild their chapter. The Ultramarines are conveniently located on the other side of the galaxy when this occurs.

757998.M41: The Third War for Armageddon begins. Having learned from past mistakes, Imperial Commanders commit a ridiculous amount of forces to hold the world. It drags on for months in a bloody stalemate, and soon Ghazghkull grows bored and leaves his generals to finish the fight while he goes looking for other worlds to conquer. [[Commissar Yarrick]] joins a [[Black Templars]] Crusade and gives chase. The Ultramarines are conveniently located on the other side of the galaxy when this occurs.

5999.M41: Warmaster [[Abaddon]] launches the [[13th Black Crusade]]. The armies of [[Chaos]] Undivided lay siege primarily to [[Cadia]] but attack many of the surrounding worlds as well. Imperial Forces launch a massive counterattack, and eventually push back the tides of [[Chaos]], but only just barely, and at great cost. The [[Space Wolves]]' 13th Company are amongst the forces seen fighting against the forces of chaos. The Ultramarines are conveniently located on the other side of the galaxy when this occurs.

As an additional note of interest, there stands reasonable evidence that the Ultramarines are partially responsible for unleashing the Nightbringer on the galaxy in the current age. On the planet Pavonis, it was brought to the attention of Uriel Ventris, of the 4th company of the Ultramarines, that a group of revolutionaries were digging their way straight to the Nightbringer's sarcophagus while the Dark Eldar rounded up the keys to unlock the thing. Uriel was given a choice: he could either exterminatus the planet, burying the Nightbringer, revolutionaries, and Dark Eldar all at once in a single fell swoop, or he could boost his own ego by making a balls-first attack on the excavation site with nothing but chain swords and bolters. Unfortunately for the entire galaxy, Uriel chose the latter of these options, lost the fight, and let the Nightbringer get free.  Which in lay man's terms means that they made the single largest fuck up to end all fuck ups of all time.  Oops...

[[File:1280346485348.jpg|thumb|right|While most believe the story told by the Ultrasmurfs, eye-witnesses paint a different story...]]

==Notable Members==
*[[Marneus Calgar|Papa Smurf]], the current Chapter Master of the Ultramarines and plated with heavy duty, fanboy-grade plot armor. Apart from being thoroughly ripped apart by a Tyranid (by that we mean all his limbs, a large portion of his body and his eye) and surviving with the help bionics, single handedly holding off an Ork Waaagh for 9 days all by himself and killing a daemon prince with only a squad of Terminators then again by stabbing him with a warp-touched dagger named "The shard of Erebus": his crowning Mary-sue moment is by beating an Eldar Avatar of Khaine in 1vs1, hand-to-hand combat, which is typically killed by the same effort it takes to kill a Khornate Bloodthirster.

*Captain Sicarius, the captain of the Ultramarines Second Company, is [[Mary Sue|suicidally brave]]. He and his company alone have held off over 10,000 Orks at once, using only knives and [[plot armor]] favoritism to survive, and he is stated to command "the finest fighting unit in this [ultramarines] or any other Space Marine Chapter". He once divided his company into thirds to defeat an entire tomb world, was only wounded as a result, and still managed to blow up the planet.

*Ortan Cassius, a chaplain of the Ultramarines, is one of the oldest Space Marines alive and [[Bjorn the Fell Handed|not yet placed in a Dreadnaught]]. His public speaking skill is perfect, so much so that it makes the Eldar weep. Though the Ultramarines are already [[Mary Sue|supremely and undeniably perfect enough - undefeatable to the point of being boring really; it's like watching Superman: "Oh, no! Not a continent made out of Kryptonite! What's Superman going to do? Oh! I guess he throws it into space! I was on the edge of my seat!"]] - Cassius is such a great Chaplain that he can push his men to even more god-like feats of brilliance.

*Varro Tigurius, the Ultramarine's Chief Librarian, is the most special snowflake of all the Imperium's psykers. He is so amazingly powerful that he can predict an enemy's entire battle plan before the fight begins, allowing him to counter any attacker from the start. His Mary Sue presence is so great that he can do unbelievable things, such as communicating with the Tyranid Hive Mind, allowing him to understand and predict the plans of untold numbers of inhuman monsters all thinking and acting as one. Supposedly his powers rival those of the Emperor, put Eldar Farseers to shame and yet place him in no real danger of being tempted or being violently possessed by the Ruinous Powers, considering his soul has to shine like a motherfucking lighthouse in the warp with all the powers he's capable of dishing out. '''Please note that before Matt Ward, this guy had LD 9.''' 

*Torias Telion (aka. Shawn Khanerry made [[Grimdark]]), the Ultramarine Scout Sergeant, is the best sniper currently alive in the Imperium. His ability is so beyond realistic that he can shoot a target so far away that ''planetary curvature'' must be taken into account. He's so great that other chapters prefer to borrow him to train their scouts instead of using their own sergeants. He once killed a Tau ethereal and cadre commander in one sitting using only two bullets from extreme range. He is also bald. Yes, as in [[Indrick Boreale|Indrick Baldeale]] bald. Still though, he isn't as awesome nor as [[grimdark]] as the [[Blood Ravens|hair-etical scout sergeant who morbidly bitches about everything in the universe]].

*Captain "Tits" Titus is a Smurf Captain of who the fuck knows company.(Probably second)On a forge world called gayah,(Grey-ahhh) trying to keep a whole waaagh from stealing all the bitz for themselves while keeping a probably radical Inqusitor happy. Also theres a portal to the warp opening letting out Deamons and chaos marines on a pub crawl. On top of that he only takes with him a defeatist little shitstain and a crusty old man who is jealous that he is not the captain.[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xgryw5cZrHg]] Here you can wach him fuck over some chaos marine. Also, he's voiced by Mark Strong. 

*Chaplain Varnus, an Ultramarines Chaplain dispatched to Lorn V. He bansished a Bloodthirster of Khorne back into the warp in melee combat within a matter of seconds of swinging his Crozius Arcanum; something that would typically need a squad of grey knight terminators to do over the course of several minutes of protracted combat, an armored division of Heavy tanks or 'bout.....5 squads of heavily equipped Space Marines led by the, bravest balls-on-head suicidal, Commanders who can stand up against a giant, cow-dog daemon of death with a FUCKHEUG mace. Yeah, Plot armor tends to do that. In the fagged-up writings of C.S. Multilazor, he was actually a vile Alpha Legion Chaos Space Marine. Of course, this is obviously false, for how can the [[Mary Sue|oh so perfect, virtuous, noble and indeed, holier-than-thou Ultramarines]] possible be profane servitors of Chaos?!

*Many others. If there is a tactic or important role that is occupied in an army, there is a spehul snowflake in the Ultramarines who has mastered it with such gravity that he makes the rest of the Imperium, or more likely the entire galaxy, redundant.

== Movie ==
*"And the greatest of them all are the Ultramarines." [[Rage|FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF-]]
(To be honest however, were John Hurt speaking of a different chapter, our responses who still be congruent.)
The movie, written by the capable Dan Abnett, actually gives probably the most realistic interpretation of the Ultramarines. Simply put: they get fucked up. The geniuses decided to put scouts in their first combat deployment wearing power armor and not knowing how to use their guns. Their Force Commander is a cocksure moron who charges into battle against a daemon prince alone. The only sane man in the squad is a geriatric Apothecary who everyone ignores. After the Force Commander dies, command is given over to a paranoid trigger happy lunatic. The Force Commander, who is OBVIOUSLY NOT A DAEMON POSSESSING HIS BODY comes back and kills everyone, and only two Marines survive the entire encounter. 

Yep. Humanity's greatest all right.

==Reasons Every Other Chapter Is Better==
There are ongoing reasons that every other chapter of both Loyalist and Traitor legion are better than the Ultramarines. Here are but a few:

* They did not fight against the traitor legions on the walls of the Imperial Palace, fighting with all they had to defend Terra against horrors the likes of which had never been seen before in the history of the Imperium.
** That award goes to the [[Imperial Fists]].

* They did not lose half of their chapter to [[heresy]] and engage on a millenia-long crusade of penance to clear their name in the eyes of all other chapters, a never-ending quest that causes them to heroically go up against all odds in order to restore their chapter's shattered honor.
** That award goes to the [[Dark Angels]].

* They do not have the balls to ignore what their Chaptermaster wishes, realizing that a chapter with a decentralized command structure is far more effective, choose instead to, like [[Black Templars|a few other badasses]], do their own thing. This means they head around the galaxy and [[/tg/ gets shit done|openly lending their aid to any Imperial Guard, Planetary Government, or Space Marine unit that needs their assistance]] in sabotage, covert ops, and assassination, which [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LdRbiJ29VkM includes an assault on a heavily-fortified Tau outpost that captures the ethereal and leaves hundreds dead via a covert strike of a single squad].
** That award goes to the [[Raven Guard]].

* They did not wind up taking a heavily-defended city that had dug in with fifty marines after it had 2 weeks to prepare its defenses because taking it the quick way with hundreds of casualties "would have been too easy."
** That award goes to the [[Alpha Legion]].

* They did not wind up having a Primarch fighting alongside the Emperor deep into Horus' battle barge during the Horus Heresy, only to wind up in a doomed battle that he himself could not win - but fought nonetheless knowing full well that death awaited no matter what course he took.
** That award goes to the [[Blood Angels]].

* They are not kickass vikings in space with a Primarch that fucking kicked that [[Furry|Faggot]] Horus' ass in a duel and are so manly that the [[Imperial Guard]] named a tank after him.
** That award goes to the [[Space Wolves]].

* They are not crafted from the Emperor's Gene-Seed and are privy to knowledge that would destroy lesser men, tasked with the all-important mission of having to destroy the most powerful entities ever brought about from the warp or die in the attempt.
** That award goes to the [[Grey Knights]].

* They are not angry enough to shit plasma grenades and then punch someone in the face with one just to show you just how awesome they are.
** That award goes to the [[Angry Marines]].

* They are do not capable of blending in for more than 3 seconds and resolving conflicts simply by talking to their opponents instead of shooting them.
** That award goes to the [[Reasonable Marines]].

* They are not Space Marine Space Pirates that are out for the plunder, wenches, and cool hats.
** That award goes to the [[Red Corsairs]].

* They are not angry enough to contest the Angry Marines' claim on being the angriest whilst having the support of an almost-as-angry god, while also being the best melee fighters in the setting.
** That award goes to the [[World Eaters]].

* They are not created by having a lesser daemon posses them and exorcised later as so to be more resistant to daemonic corruption, which would normally result with most Space Marines going insane.
** That award goes to the [[Exorcists]], a chapter that stemmed from the Grey Knights.

* They aren't that awesomesauce enough to create 2 memes in a single game.
** That award goes to the [[Blood Ravens]], specifically to [[Indrick Boreale]].

* They don't have a thick-enough plot armor to have no more but 4 Space Marine squads stand up to a Tyranid invasion and Chaos intrusion, all while nearly having no heavy armor support other than a senile Dreadnought.
** That award again goes to the [[Blood Ravens]].

* They don't have a [[DURR|''Hair''-etical]]-enough commander and sergeant with a hairstyle that makes them look like Vanilla Ice.
** The award ''also'' goes to the [[Blood Ravens]].

* They do not go around "acquiring" a very large number of priceless artifacts from a dozen other Space Marine Chapters, the Adeptus Custodes, the Inquisition, and even from Chaos.
** That award also <s>goes to</s> was stolen by the [[Blood Ravens]].
* They didn't manage to troll an entire marine chapter by having them assault a heavily fortified fortress, and then ambushing them in said fortress after it was but a trap.
** That award goes to the [[Iron Warriors]].

* They didn't have the balls to defy the Codex Astartes and have more than 1000 marines in a single chapter in-order to commence a never-ending crusade of awesomeness that resulted in numerous victories, purged millions upon millions of filthy heretics, mutants, and Xenos, while doing it in a medieval-esque fashion that involves them rushing their target with the intent to go CQC as much as possible.
** That award goes to the [[Black Templars]].

* They did not successfully troll the [[Ultramarines]] into not only abandoning Terra on a fool's errand, but kicking the smurfs' asses in the process.
** That award also goes to the [[Alpha Legion]].

* They are not badass black marines that kicked the shit out of foul xenos with flamer and melta weapons even after shreds of their chapter went [[Chaos|dumbshit]].
** That award goes to the [[Salamanders]].

*They did not achieve this feat while remaining fundamentally decent human beings in a universe that pisses [[grimdark]].
** That award also goes to the [[Salamanders]].

*They do not have a very large amount of master crafted and artificer wargear because they give their artificers extra time to make them since each marine maintains his own wargear.
** The third award that goes to the [[Salamanders]]

* They were not capable of getting entire star systems to unconditionally surrender via the mere ''mention'' that they were approaching a system.
** That award goes to the [[Night Lords]].

* They did not turn traitor to protect priceless bits of lore because [[Emperor|daddy]] wanted to be a fuckwit and decided to hate on Psykers.
** That award goes to the [[Thousand Sons]].

* They did not simultaneously tell both Chaos and the Imperium to fuck off due to Tzeentch and now go around the galaxy in a Space Hulk fighting everyone in the name of the Emperor led by a [[Awesome|half spider Chapter Master]].
** That award goes to the Soul Drinkers.

* They did not have two homeworlds destroyed, been brought back from the brink of extinction many times, then finally have the entire Chapter disappear in the warp, only to come back with a different paint job and name, to help Imperials in their time of need, while battling a warp disease that destroys their sanity but gives them incredible strength.
** That award goes to the Fire Hawks/Legion of the Damned.

* They do not manage to be tactically competent and even come off as likable and relate-able to the normal people of the Imperium despite being superhuman warriors.
** That award goes to the Iron Snakes.

==Gallery==

<gallery>
File:Spacemarine.jpg|PLOT ARMOUR HO!!1!
File:Warhammer ultramarine take 2 by faroldjo.jpg|Its hard work holding up a banner on the wrong end of the galaxy
File:Ultramarines concept by Malkavian7515.jpg|Not everything can be made of awesome
File:Ultramarines vs Tyranids.jpg|Horus during the siege of Terra
File:Ultramarinesgt.jpg|Honoured Brother Ward banner
</gallery>

==See also==
*[[Mary Sue]]
*[[Fluff]]
*[[Who Watches Them]]
*[[Macragge heresy]]

[[Category:Imperial]][[Category:Warhammer 40,000]]