Editing Giant Space Hamster (section)

==The Diffuse Family Tree==
If there's one adage that rings true throughout [[Wildspace]], it's this: "you can always trust a [[Tinker Gnome]] to fuck something up". And, sure enough,  that applies to Giant Space Hamsters, too.

To start with, having successfully bred the basic hamster from the size of an overfed mouse to the size of a brown bear, some gnomish genius somewhere decided to reverse the process. And thus we ended up with the [[Miniature Giant Space Hamster]]. Now, if this was the be-all, end-all of minoi fuckery, nobody would mind, but of course they couldn't let it go at that. Thus a wide variety of horrible hamster mutants were unleashed upon the universe... and, luckily for you, because 1d4chan does what others don't, we're going to tell you about them all!

'''Subterranean Giant Space Hamster:''' This strain sports massive claws that allow it to dig through soil and even rip apart softer rocks in its drive to burrow. Aside from being capable diggers, they can actually defend themselves with vicious claw attacks.

'''Saber-toothed Giant Space Hamster:''' Whilst still omnivorous, as the name suggests, this strain has developed oversized incisors, giving it a bite to truly fear.

'''Rather Wild Giant Space Hamster:''' A perfect example of gnomish understatement, this strain is exceptionally aggressive for a giant space hamster, with a morale of 19 (compared to the 6 of a domesticated GSH and the 9 of a wild one) and a +2 bonus to its attack and damage rolls.

'''Invisible Giant Space Hamster:''' This strain can become invisible for 1d4+4 turns once per day, and remains invisible even whilst attacking.

'''Sylvan/Jungle Giant Space Hamster:''' Adapted for life in a more arboreal environment, this strain has a remarkable affinity for climbing.

'''Armor Plated Giant Space Hamster:''' Easily identified by its possessing a tough, rhino-like hide instead of fur, this strain is also very aggressive (morale 16) and should be regarded with caution.

'''Yellow Musk Giant Space Hamster:''' The bright yellow fur of this strain warns onlookers to stay away, as overactive musk glands secrete a protective cloud of noxious fumes that causes nausea, blindness and weakness in anyone who gets too close.

'''Ethereal Giant Space Hamster:''' Actually misleadingly named. This strain cannot enter the [[Ethereal Plane]]. But its flesh is permanently translucent, causing it to be mistaken for an animated giant hamster [[skeleton]] at first glance.

'''Carnivorous Flying Giant Space Hamster:''' Surprisingly quick-flyers, these predatory giant space hamsters are one of the truly dangerous strains.

'''Two-Headed Lernean Bombardier Giant Space Hamster:''' Why would you give a giant hamster two heads, the ability to regenerate damage like a troll, and the ability to unleash a stunning belch attack once per day? Answer: gnomes are idiots.

''' Fire-Breathing Phase Doppelganger Giant Space Hamster:''' If it's not bad enough that you have a giant hamster that can spit fire and shift between the [[Prime Material]] and the [[Ethereal Plane]] at will, but then you also give it the ability to shapeshift into any other "bear-sized mammal" as well as remarkably high intelligence for an animal (Int 5-7). Once again: gnomes are ''idiots''. 

'''Great Horned Giant Space Hamster:''' Equipped with a rhino-like horn, these giant space hamsters can make deadly charge attacks.

'''Abominable Giant Space Hamster:''' These white-furred giant space hamsters are adapted for life in arctic climates. They feed primarily on conifers, are immune to mundane cold, and halve magical cold damage.

'''Tyrannohamsterus Rex:''' There are some things that should bleedingly obvious. Such as, for example, taking the giant space hamster, already a neurotically timid and docile beast, and bulking it up into a 25' tall, 75 ton monster without augmenting its courage is a bad idea that should be avoided. Fucking gnomes. Still, at least the panicked rampages of the tyrannohamsterus rex annihilated the gnomish colony where it was bred, so they should be a dying race.

'''Giant Space Hamster of Ill Omen:''' This final strain is a beast of legend. Indeed, stories say there is only one such brute, a creature known and feared amongst gnomekind as "Wooly Rupert". Bigger even than a Tyrannohamsterus Rex, Woolly Rupert is said to possess a genius level intellect, a mastery of arcane magic, and a burning hatred of gnomes. The stories say that he has his own spelljammer, which he uses to scour wildspace, dreaming of annihilating all minoi everywhere. If these tales are true, then Woolly Rupert is good people.

Whilst the aforementioned are the strains mechanically different enough to the standard giant space hamster to warrant discussion, the fact is that breeding new subspecies of giant space hamster is something of a fixation amongst spacefaring gnomes. Most of the time, however, all you have is a cosmetic reskin of the standard giant space hamster. Known examples of these "lesser" strains include the woolly, mottled, ochre, Oriental, Occidental, chartreuse, spotted, not-quite-so-spotted, only-a-little-spotted, plaid, cave-dwelling, three-toed, lesser, greater, greater lesser, lesser greater, albino, and flightless giant space hamsters.