Editing High Elves (Warhammer Fantasy) (section)

==A brief overview==
In [[Warhammer Fantasy]], the High Elves are the original [[elves]] and live on their Atlantis doughnut [[Ulthuan]] where they sang, built statues and temples, grew their hair, throw softcore orgies and rode monsters into the sunset and out of the sunrise again, all the things one would do in a perfect paradise made just for them.

[[FAIL|Then it all went to shit]].

The causes of this are threefold: Because the [[Old Ones]] didn't clean up after themselves, or lost a war against Chaos, or it's all according to plan, or whatever. [[Chaos]] flooded out like a pierced beer can into the world and were going to destroy it without a problem. The first Phoenix King, Aenarion, got his shit together and closed the gate thereby saving the world. Then a bunch of shit happened. Eventually his son Malekith got butthurt over not being picked the next king over some guy named Bel Shanaar and started the [[Dark Elves (Warhammer)|Dark Elves]]. Because the Dark Elves are the Sith of Warhammer they pushed really far into Ulthuan, but then Caledor the first came and Cosgrove'd Malekith back to the northern reaches of the New World. (Which means Canadians are Cenobites.) 

Caledor the second pissed off the Dwarfs, doing his bit to ensure that they didn't go too long without being bullied, but then he got himself killed and left his fancy [[Hats|hat]] behind, which is just bad play. Then Malekith came back and fucked shit up good so the High Elves elected Caradryel who realized that keeping colonies and making war on Dwarfs when you're about to be wiped out is stupid and ordered all non-Dark Elves to come home and defend the motherland, but the colonists who discovered pot and treefucking had better ideas and retreated into the woods, becoming Wood Elves. (Which means the Swiss are Ithorians.) 

The High Elves as we know them today are a dying race where every citizen is a soldier because there's so few left they can't support a standing army. (Although they still have high enough birth rate to make up for losses, because GW says [[Derp|there are always as many or as few elves as the plot for the book in question demands]]. So apparent consistency can suck it.) They're still the strongest force in the world, and if they get wiped out then the kinda dark and sorta grim Warhammer Fantasy becomes [[Grimdark|grimdarkness]] of Warhammer 40k. So yeah, they're kind of important if you aren't playing Daemons or Warriors of Chaos (or Beastmen goddammit!).

Of course, most High Elves are [[That guy|douchebags]] and most of the rest of the world are too, so everyone always has a reason to fight each other.