Editing Dwarf Fortress (section)

==Creatures of Dwarf Fortress==
===Dorfs===
[[Dwarves|Dorfs]] (singular: [[Dwarf|Dorf]]) are awesome short beardy alcoholic manic-depressive guys that like to dig. They enjoy mining, drinking, money, and bashing goblin heads in. Shocking, I know.  
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Image:Dfcomic01.png|Dwarfs are known to come in packs. In packs of FUCKING USELESS <s>VAGRANTS</s> MIGRANTS!
Image:DF_Badass_1.png|Sometimes a proficient macedwarf is able to handle a Bronze Colossus single-handedly. Bronze Colossuses are actually ~7 times taller than dwarves and do not bleed. (That's probably actually a giant, but still impressive...)
Image:DF_Badass_2.jpg|Female dwarfs are the manliest females known to exist.
Image:Ironbeard dwarfbreath.JPG|Dwarfs will use surrounding items as improvised weapons, and become the last thing most fortress invaders ever see. Especially if the flood gate was [[The floor is lava|in use at the time.]]
Image:Hermitdorf.jpg|Standard dwarven hermit.
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====Nobles====
Nobles are the bane of the land. If a dwarven fortress gets big and wealthy enough, they will soon be infested with an unending stream of these pompous freeloaders. They require ridiculously luxurious apartments and develop the [[Slaanesh|weirdest fetishes possible]], then require you to make items out of materials neither you nor merchants can provide, such as [[LOLWUT|demanding you build glass windows in the middle of a freezing tundra]]. Should you fail to fulfill these desires, they will happily imprison or execute your most skilled workers. 

Because of these antisocial tendencies, [http://dwarffortresswiki.org/index.php/DF2014:Unfortunate_accident Killing nobles] in the most spectacular way possible is one of the most common forms of entertainment in Dwarf Fortress.
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Image:DF_Noble_Fetishists.png
Image:DF_Gentlenobles.jpg
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====Artifacts====
Dwarves get so-called "Strange Moods" once in a while. When in this state, they will claim a workshop for the job they are most proficient in, get some (often obscure) materials and start working on them. Artifacts can be quite literally any craftable item type in the game (including several that normally can't even be crafted by dwarves); examples include millstones, gates, boots, backpacks, and, of course, weapons and armor.  Once completed, you can 'view' your artifact; If you choose to do so, a page describing the attributes of the artifact and its name will appear. For example:

''"Trailmachines the Fellowship of Right"''

This is a adamantine plate mail. All craftsdwarfship is of the highest quality.
On the item is an image of Landslantern the fire imp and Kib Clinchworks the dwarf in Adamantine. Kib Clinchworks is striking down Landslantern. The artwork relates to the killing of the fire imp Landslantern by the dwarf Kib Clinchworks in Headshoots in the early autumn of 107.
On the item is an image of a dwarf in Adamantine. The dwarf is cheering.

The name of the artifact's creator and the date it was created will also appear.

If a dwarf does not get the materials he needs in time, he goes mad. Sometimes he will kill another dwarf and make the artifact out of the resulting corpse. If he does, he will create some hilariously described items.
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Image:DF_artifact_(1).jpg|The cup menaces with the spikes of steel!
Image:DF_artifact_(2).jpg
Image:Dire_Cake.jpg
Image:Trailmachines.jpeg|Trailmachines the Fellowship of Right
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====Fire Cults====
Dwarves have strong affection to fire, magma and generally anything that burns. The hotter it is, the better.

The only rational reason behind it can be some suicide [[Salamanders|fire worshiping sect.]]
<gallery>
Image:Elephant final solution.jpg|Drown the world with magma.  Its the only way to be sure.
Image:DF_Magma.jpg|Dwarf loev magma.
Image:Magmalever.gif|Urist, what do your dwarf eyes see?
Image:DF_Pants.jpg|Those pants are going to make a valuable addition to my Pants On Fire collection!
Image:Boatmurdered_flame.jpg|Dwarfs don't know that fire burns, so they pick up burning items and bring them to the stockpiles.
Image:DF_FIRE.png
Image:Dwarf_title_boo_radley_anonib.gif|A dwarf on fire. Completely unrealistic, in that the dwarf has noticed.
Image:Fire.png|He would put out that fire. But he's on break.
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===Elves===
[[Elves]] (singular: elf) are cannibal treehuggers, whose only redeeming quality is the effectiveness of elf bone bolts. In Fortress Mode, Elves may come to trade with your colony, offering herbs, clothing, livestock, and endless bitching about how many trees you've been cutting down. They will gladly accept payment in the form of gems or precious metals, but don't even think about presenting them in a wooden box. Despite being literal cannibals, the Elves view the killing of trees and animals as a serious offense, and offering them wood or animal products will [[Book of Grudges|seriously offend them]]. On the bright side, their exclusive use of wooden weapons usually makes Elven armies a pushover in combat, assuming they didn't bring a horde of [[Awesome|trained war elephants]] with them. If confronted with such a scenario, you must open your magma death trap and kill them all, or you will be [[DOOM: Repercussions of Evil|EAT BY ELFS.]] 

The only proper dorfy elf to ever exist is Cacame Awemedinade, an elf soldier serving in a dwarf-owned city who became king through a hilarious clerical error, then proved his worth by killing lots of things with a warhammer.
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Image:DF_Elf_Diplomat_1.png|Elves send diplomats...
Image:DF_Elf_Diplomat_2.png|...to ensure you don't cut down too many trees.
Image:DF_elf.jpg|Ha-ha.
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===Goblins===
[[Goblins]] are creatures of pure evil, who live in caves, dark pits, and sprawling underground lairs. Goblin civilizations are almost always led by a ''{{BLAM|Clown}}'' (see "Hidden Fun Stuff"), but thanks to their proclivity towards kidnapping children of all species, it is not at all uncommon to see humans, elves, or even dwarves among their ranks. Their only export is hatred, and their only import is Dwarven vengeance. [[Grimdark|As long as a single goblin draws breath, your fortress will never be safe]].

Due to their large numbers and propensity for violence, goblins are a common enemy in both Fortress and Adventure mode. A goblin army may seem threatening to new players, but veterans of the game have come up with several ways to extract riches and entertainment from these unwanted guests. Some uses of goblins include target practice, gladiator fights, and the refining of a resource called [[Loot|"Goblinite"]]. The last of these can be done by luring the invading force into a room full of traps, pulling the lever, and then [[just as planned|sending in your dwarves to separate the goodies from the resulting piles of gore]].

===Cats===
[[Cats]] are the bane of a fortress' existence. You must slaughter all of them before they outbreed you and either cause your dorfs to suffocate (since all the air is filled with cats), or cause your computer to destroy itself due to the sheer amount of cats it has to render on-screen. Even the most powerful server-grade processor chokes and dies the minute someone forgets to sterilize their cats.
<gallery>
Image:DF_Cats_1.png
Image:DF_cats_2.png
Image:DF_Cats_3.png|Trust your feelings, you know it to be the only solution.
Image:1194770522105.jpg|[[Artist]]'s rendition of a "catsplosion;" from beginning to devastating end.
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===Pigs===
Unlike most other livestock, pigs don't need to graze, and thus each pig can be assigned to a 1×1 pasture without any grass. In other words [[awesome|they dont need a food source]]. Their population can grow fast like cats, but unlike cats, you can milk pigs!
<gallery>
File:PigPen.png|thumb|Dwarf stares menacingly at pig.
File:PigHorde.png|thumb|The result of keeping too many pigs.
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===Forgotten Beasts===
[[Carp|Forgotten Beasts]] are procedurally-generated monsters found in the depths of the caverns. Depending on how the RNG gods are feeling, they can either be [[Tyranids|a skinless monstrosity covered in claws and eyes]], or a blob of water/blood/vomit that [[Fail|falls apart as soon as a dwarf touches it]]. On average, though, they tend to be more of the former, and the meaner ones would make a [[Tarrasque]] look like a crying little girl. If any dwarf draws near a cavern, they are immediately at risk of being consumed by the horror. If a Forgotten Beast spawns near your fortress, your best bet is to WALL IT OFF IMMEDIATELY OR SUFFER THE CONSEQUENCES.

===Carp===
Common freshwater fish, considered "Honorary Forgotten Beasts" for killing many a Fisherdwarf in older versions. They are now much more benign (unless you mod the deadly carp back in, of course). Stay away from the river.

<gallery>
Image:Dfcomic03.png|Getting fishdwarfs lost to carp can bring the fortress down in one huge outburst of violence.
Image:DF_Carp_1.jpg
Image:DF_Carp_2.jpg|Magma is the answer. Magma is [[Boatmurdered|''always'']] the answer.
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===Elephants===
'''Elephants''' used to be demonic creatures of the plains. They mercilessly killed your Dwarves and then killed the Dwarves that rushed out of the fortress to loot the bodies of their fallen comrades. Elephants never forget, and never forgive, and they never sleep. They spend every moment of every day plotting the downfall of your fortress.

Elephants were turned into much more peaceful beings in the newer versions of the game, so now you can settle near a savanna and have your revenge. The vacant place of dwarf-murderer was taken by the vicious [[Dwarf_Fortress#Carp|Forgotten Beasts]]. In a strange turn of events thanks to a later update, Elephants have fallen from the noble title of "bane of dwarves" to [[Derp|a creature that literally starves to death while eating 24/7,]] thanks to some coding...flaws. Said bug has since been fixed, and now they're strong but don't attack dwarves- or at least, not very often. 

Ironically, despite the game making them more peaceful, real-life Elephants are more like the original "train of pachyderm death" portrayal (particularly the African elephants, which are bigger, more aggressive and have longer tusks than the Indian ones).

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Image:DF_Elephant.png|That's how it all happens.
Image:DF_Elephant_Engraving.jpg|Fortress Walls are engraved with this kind of pictures.
Image:Dwarf_dorf_anonib.png
Image:DF_Skeletal_Elephant.jpg|Skeletal Elephant. Deadly death of death.
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===Giant Sponges===
A more recent addition to Dwarf Fortress, the '''giant sponge''' has become more feared than even the carp. A giant sponge can easily wipe out an entire army of dwarves with a single charge, which is rather peculiar as they are completely immobile. However, they're virtually invincible, as their lack of any organs or blood allows them to harmlessly absorb blows that would kill anything else several times over. How they are able to kill anything with their soft, squishy bodies is a mystery nobody is willing to risk trying to solve. 

While common Giant Sponges can "drown" out of water, ''undead'' Giant Sponges are [[Nagash|fucking immortal]]. Setting it on fire will just create a giant torch of undead death. If you see one, say your last farewells to your <s>crazy stupid</s> brave dorfs.

In more recent versions, giant sponges are now hilariously vulnerable to getting flattened by mundane attacks, such as being crushed with a maul. They're still just as lethal, but they're essentially glass cannons now. In addition, since undead are now vulnerable only to getting pulped instead of randomly dying after enough hits, undead giant sponges are basically normal sponges, only amphibious.

<gallery>
Image:Sponge.gif|Without a nervous system, the only thing it can feel is ANGER!
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