Editing Harry Potter (section)

===Main Cast===
[[File:Harry-potter-characters-book-vs-movie.jpg|thumbnail|right|400px|Dramatis Personae]]
* '''Harry Potter''': The Boy Who Lived and main protagonist. [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Books_of_Magic An unassuming English kid with glasses that obtains a pet owl, and takes up his preordained destiny to enter a secret world of magic hidden in plain sight]. The Dark Lord tried to kill him when he was a toddler, but his parents loved him and the spell bounced and made the Dark Lord vanish instead (if that raises questions you've probably already put more thought into it than the author did). Went to stay with his abusive aunt and uncle and didn't notice he was a Wizard until  [https://www.wikiwand.com/en/Obi-Wan_Kenobi#Original_trilogy_(1977%E2%80%931983) an hobo came to his house and told him.] Not the smartest knife in the drawer, and for much of the series he's actually more hated than loved by the wizardry world due to him being an angsty kid and the author catering to the needs of the angsty kid audience. In-universe much of that hate stems from Harry being a very normal teenager instead of the magical titan they expect (even though that should be blatantly obvious). Also has a nasty habit to pull lucky deus ex machinas out of his own arse to save himself.  But that part is at least self-acknowledged in the books, where Harry repeatedly tries to impress on his classmates that they don't have his plot armor and most of the things he did probably shouldn't have worked. He's also a rich trust-fund kid, having received a lot of gold form his parents and inheriting more from the Blacks. Despite that he very often lives rent-free at the expensed of the much poorer Weasley family, destroys their car and never gives them even one penny because fuck you poor people. 
* '''Hermione Granger''': Smart nerd girl and probably your first erection. When she gets a magical object that allows her to travel through time she uses it to study more instead of, for example, [[Old Man Henderson|solving every problem ever]]. Out of the blue she decided to bone the Comic Relief character at the end of the last book despite treating him as a dimwit for 7 years. The author has later admitted this was a mistake, even going as far as to say their relationship would be tumultuous. In the books she tries to end the enslavement of the Elves and got mocked for it because... erhm... Slavery good? Mercifully the author decided to suddenly make the whole plot line vanish without even a throwaway line before it got ever more embarrassing.
* '''Ron Weasley''': Redhead comic relief. That's about it. Once he had a pet rat that was an old hairy man in disguise and slept with him. His brothers, due to the Marauder's Map (a magical object that shows the location of everybody in Hogwarts, [http://eggabase.com/wp-content/uploads/Easter_Eggs/Movies/Harry_Potter_and_the_Prisoner_of_Azkaban/Naughty-Marauders-Map-MI-350x300.jpg with all the unfortunate implications]), probably knew about this and was totally ok with it. Bangs a chick way out of his league due to contrived plot reasons.
* '''Voldemort''': aka Magical Hitler but with the brush moustache swapped for complete hair loss and a snake face and swastikas replaced with snakes. No, really. He wants to eliminate everyone with muggle ancestry, wizard or not. Why? Because his mother date-raped his father with a love potion, said father abandoned them after getting off the potion and she died giving birth to him.  That sucks, but no need to take out your issues on the rest of mankind. For half of the series he's in a ghostlike state until he gets himself a new body (he was noseless before, it was a side-effect of splitting his soul and putting the pieces in soul jars), thanks to the fact that he [[Lich|split his soul up into a bunch of different objects]]. Is finally killed for real when Harry destroys all the Horcruxes - himself included. WHAT A TWIST! But then Harry's still alive because he's the master of the Deathly Hallows! DOUBLE TWEEST!
* '''Albus Dumbledore:''' Headmaster of Hogwarts, most powerful wizard in the world and all around cool old coot. Initially considered a bit of an airheaded old codger who was none the less nice and supportive, but as the books progress, we learn he'd been playing 5D time travel diamond chess against the forces of Voldemort, secretly and clandestinely pulling the strings of all other characters in the series, like a noblebright [[A Song of Ice and Fire|Littlefinger]]/[[Lord of Change]]. Dies, but it’s okay, because he [[Just as Planned|planned around it]].
* '''Alan Rickman:''' As <s>Severus Snape</s> himself.  Ron Weasley's actor was legit terrified of him for the first couple movies. Once, the kid drew an unflattering picture of Rickman and got caught. Alan made him sign it, then kept the picture until the day he died because he thought it was funny.