Editing Hassan (section)

===Crazy Hassan and the Fremen===

There rumors of Mahdi's arrival were already being spread - the Harkonnen troops were scrambling in the fortified towns as the tribes prepared for the offensive. The battles would not take place until a few weeks have passed, but the whole sietch was prepared for when the signal would be given.

And suddenly, it arrived. The bat with the dis-trans signal was there, and the whole sietch was ready to move. The naib planted a thumper that would summon the worm to take the Fremen into the battle.

Lump... lump... lump...

lump... lump... lump...

lump... lump... lump...

Naib Samas was confused. The thumpers usually summoned a worm in a matter of minutes. Their thumper was working for half an hour and nothing, not even the smalles wormsign appeared. The whole tribe was looking at it, wondering whether the Shai'Hulud left them.

Lump... lump... lump...

lump... lump... lump...

lump... lump... lump...

Suddenly, one warrior spotted a speck of dust on a nearby dune. "Something is there!" he yelled in Chakobsa. Everyone turned, but Samas quickly spotted the flaw - the sand was not moving in a wave. In fact, it was more of a disturbance on the dune. "What in the name of-" he muttered. Suddenly, a small dot emerged from the top of the sand hill and started running towards them. Behind it was a large number of similar dots. As the shapes moved closer, a yell was heard. "CRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRAZY HASSAN HERE! YOU NEED TRANSPORT? CHEAP CAMEL! GIVE SOME DATES! BARGAIN!"

The Naib was frustrated. Not only was the figure (which was now pretty close) not wearing a stillsuit, it didn't even have the blue-in-blue spice eyes OR show any kind of exhaustion. They were deep in the desert with no water source - the nearest town was thousands of miles away. The man would have to brave sandworms and other treacherous dangers of the desert, not to speak of the large herd of the strange animals behind him.

"Should I take his life's water?" spoke one of the warriors. "No. I shall hear him out," said the naib, "for he has braved the desert. He is either a god or a madman". "HASSAN NO GOD!" yelled the figure. "HASSAN CRRRRRRRAZY! YOU NEED MOVE FAST, YES? NO LOOK FURTHER! HASSAN'S SLIGHTLY USED CAMEL EMPORIUM RIGHT HERE!". He was at the Fremen party at that time. He grinned a wide and friendly smile, showing off his snow-white teeth. He was a tall, dark man with a towel wrapped around his head and a small, red hat with a string on the end on top of it. He had a large, dark beard and was dressed in a most peculiar clothing.

"Yes... we need to move," said the Samas, "but I don't believe you can-" "HAVE CAMELS! FOR ALL! CHEAP! GIVE DATES AND SOME JACKETS!". Samas gave a silent prayer to Shai-Hulud. The message was urgent, the Harkonnen host in the fortress was strong. They needed to move fast. "Are these animals fast?" "FAST?" Hassan laughed. "THESE OUTRUN ANYONE! SPECIAL TRAINING! FASTER THAN EAGLE IN FLIGHT! MONEY BACK IF NOT TRUE! THIS DESERT! CAMEL LOVE DESERT! CAMEL BEST ANIMAL IN DESERT!". One of the warriors intruded: "The Shai'Hulud is mightier than any-" "WHAT SHAI'HULUD? IF NOT CAMEL, IT NOT GOOD!" yelled Hassan. "WORM TOO BIG, CAMEL SMALLER, CAMEL FASTER!" Naib could feel the rest of his warriors stabbing him with their eyes, but he had no choice. Someone would call him out sooner or later, and the battle had to be done. "Alright, what do you want for the-" "DEAL!" yelled the maniac and slapped his hand into the surprised Naib's. "YOU TAKE CAMELS! IS OKAY! FREE OF CHARGE!" he yelled. 

Hassan then mounted one of them and ran into a completely different direction, leaving the Fremen tribe with a large number of camels. They slowly mounted them and went into the direction of the battle.

It was a massacre, such that the Harkonnens never quite forgot their fear of camels.