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===The Fools' Guild=== ''"Dico, Dico, Dico"'' ("I say, I say, I say") Perhaps the single most depressing place on the Disc. The Fools' Guild is gravely serious about silliness, reducing jokes and slapstick routines to rote, carefully memorized, and rigidly executed performances. Custard pies must arc through the air at specific angles, rubber chickens must be slapped upside the face and not down, a set allotment of "hee-hees" and "hahs" must be recited at the correct predetermined moments, and under no circumstances is anyone to tell a joke that hasn't been through the Guild approval process. As a result, the Fools' Guild is a collection of terminally unfunny and morose clowns, each with their own signature face-paint pattern (regarded as their real face). It is implied that the guild is more than it seems: hiding under the guise of bad comedy, a small percentage of the Fools go to every court on the Disc, becoming spies that collect intelligence to be sent back to the guildmaster for unknown purposes while projecting the illusion of near-terminal harmlessness. As such, the Guild retains a measure of quiet political power below that of the other major guilds but potent nonetheless. The guild also teaches miming; however, any mime caught performing in Ankh-Morpork will find themselves sentenced to be cast into a scorpion pit by Lord Vetinari, who detests them, claiming that the world already has "enough men silently trying to escape invisible boxes." Make of this what you will.
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