Editing Memories of a Stone Wall (section)

===Act XXIX: Performers===
:>Plays always have roles few Crab warriors are keen on taking.
:>That's even assuming you can get them to overcome the embarrassment of being terrible actors in order to get them on stage in the first place.
:>A Crab gunso solved this problem, while also creating a way for his troops to relax, by inventing the concept of Draw Lot plays.
:>He took a popular play that most of the troops would know by heart, wrote the names of the roles down on slips of paper, then added enough blank slips that everyone in the squad would be able to pick one.
:>Mixed them up in his kabuto.
:>And forced the entire squad to draw.
:>The lucky ones that got roles would play those roles, no exceptions, no trading roles.
:>Since everyone had an equal chance to share in the embarrassment it was easier to get the warriors to risk it.
:>That is the Draw Lot Play of the Crab Clan.
:>An (often drunken) mess of overacting, flubbed lines, and burly giants trying to play effeminate housewives that will drive most playwrights to suicide upon learning their work had been defiled in such a manner.
:>We all gathered together in Katsuie-sama's room.
:>Aside from Katsuie, Toshiro and myself there was Yasuki Tamoko, her brother Tomoki, Hiruma Saji and Kaiu Makoto.
:>So, do you already have a play in mind?
:>Makoto looked up from where she was shuffling papers around.
:>They gave us a few different scenes to choose from... most of these are Crane written crap though...
:>We all crowded around her to look.
:>Young lovers struggle against fate.
:>Vengeance for murdered father.
:>Bumbling magistrates who solve cases by luck instead of skill.
:>Survivor of a losing battle trying to avoid capture while surviving in the woods.
:>And one of the tests of the Emerald Champion.
:>...
:>Tomoki broke the silence.
:>Wow. 
:>I know Tomo-chan.
:>Tomoki flushed at his sister calling him by his childhood nickname in public.
:>Saji solved our dilemma by producing a die from his fortunes and winds set.
:>Toshiro clapped him on the shoulder.
:>You're a genius.

:>We got the young lovers.
:>There were five roles to fill for the scene we had. 
:>The two lovers, the fiance, and the fathers.
:>So, two of the people in this room would be safe.
:>Risky odds, but with two women drawing lots and only one female role every guy was connived they wouldn't be the young woman.
:>With a prayer to Daikoku, we drew our lots.
:>...
:>No trading, no exceptions.
:>The first performance was a pair of Lion. Akodo Yoshi danced a Noh, while an Ikoma girl beat time on a kotsuzumi.
:>As the Lion danced, he spun his fan through a series of candles, snuffing them out one by one.
:>He revived quite a bit of applause when it was over.

:>I scratched at my beard.
:>That was a little hard to understand, but I got the feeling, since he was snuffing candles, that it had something to do with how short people's lives are.
:>Up next came a Kakita, I didn't remember ever seeing that one before. 
:>I realized there were a half dozen Kakita that didn't look like swordsmen in the Crane... army. 
:>There were just too many to justifiably call it an entourage.
:>The Kakita, in a fine display of humility, played a biwa and sang a song about how the Original Kakita invented the biwa and sang a song to make lady Doji fall in love with him.
:>Delighted at this reminder of how incestuous the Crane Clan families were, the crowd erupted in applause.
:>I had the thought to begin jotting my thoughts down.
:>I'd make a wonderful art critic.
:>Next, some servants brought a massive taiko drum.
:>I sat up a little straighter. 
:>The thunder of those drums always stirred my soul.
:>Out came Moto Li-Ta, dressed in proper drummer attire.
:>She bowed to the audience, then proceeded to beat the ever loving shit out of that drum.
:>As she did so, several other Unicorn leapt from the wings, whooping and hollering and dancing like mad.
:>There was a wild freedom in their performance, a sense of joy.
:>I wasn't sure what it was about, but I knew I liked it.
:>Naomi came out next, to offer a simple performance.
:>She played her Konto, and sang softly.
:>A soft lullaby she sang to the children before they slept.
:>The song itself perfectly captured the simple joy of watching your children sleep, and the pain of knowing they would one day grow up.
:>More than a few courtiers were wiping their faces discretely before she was done. 
:>Several Dragon performed a scene from a play about Matsu Hitomi. The scene they enacted was one depicting the Mirumoto Daimyo requesting her aid against the forces of the Crab.
:>I had to wonder if the Dragon remembered that once the Crab had been forced to withdraw the Mirumoto Daimyo betrayed her.

:>A presentation from the Phoenix came next.
:>Another play, this scene was the Shiba family daimyo and Phoenix Clan Champion urging the Council of Masters to keep the Isawa well back from the front lines of a war.
:>The man spoke for a long time, about the oath Shiba swore to Isawa, and how the power of the Clan's shugenja should only be unleashed in times of dire emergency.
:>Real subtle there Shoji, even I can see what you're driving at with that one.
:>I noticed considerable agitation among the Mantis delegates, before they waved off a servant.
:>I guess they weren't in the mood to participate.
:>Given that one of their courtiers had been murdered and another was now missing, I could see why.
:>Two more crane performances back to back. One a Noh, the other a kabuki.
:>At a certain point, quantity began to drown out quality from the Crane, at least to my mind.
:>The other audience members seemed to enjoy both performances though.
:>Then another performance from the Lion. Another play about Matsu Hitomi, this one covering the time when the Mirumoto Daimyo ordered her to attack the castle of a Lion lord, effectively betraying her.
:>I leaned over to Katusie-sama.
:>So, that seemed very blunt. Or am I just overthinking things?
:>No, I think your suspicions are correct, Ishigaki-san.
:>Okay.
:>I can be a bit thick so I just wanted to make sure.
:>Then came the Scorpion.
:>Amano sang a simple song, without any accompaniment.
:>About Akodo Godaigo betraying Matsu Hitomi, his lover, after she took her vengeance on the Mirumoto Daimyo.
:>Katsuie-sama sat straight up and scowled when that was done.
:>Um, Katsuie-sama?
:>His eyes narrowed. 
:>That was a warning to the Lion. 
:>I felt a cup pressed into my hand.
:>Ah. We were going to be up next.
:>Yes, it's not a proper Draw Lot Play if the actors are sober.
:>Kanpai.

:>Once we were good and drunk we stumbled out onto the stage.
:>Toshiro, me, Tomoko and Tomoki and Makoto were the lucky winners.
:>As the father of the bride to-be, I got to be the asshole in this play.
:>Toshiro was my old friend whose son, played by Makoto, was to marry my daughter, Tomoki
:>With Tomoko the brash young samurai who was going to interrupt the wedding and declare his true love for Tomoki.
:>What was supposed to happen was just as Tomoki and Makoto were exchanging vows, Tomoko was to enter the room, and declare her love. Toshiro and I would raise a fuss, Tomoki would admit his true feelings, Toshiro and I would raise more fuss, Makoto and Tomoki would take their stance, and the scene would end because the original playwright was a massive ass who loved to make audiences argue over what happened next.
:>But this was a Draw Lot Play.
:>Most of the time, we did try to do it right.
:>It's just that the actors are a bunch of bushi with no artistic talent whatsoever.
:>But over time, a certain type of Draw Lot Play gained popularity.
:>One that EMBRACED the butchery of the play.
:>And when you're dealing with Crabs performing a play none of them were familiar with and didn't even like very much...
:>There was no question in our minds how this would go.
:>I sat nodding in approval as Tomoki and Makoto began swearing their marriage vows.
:>HOLD IT RIGHT THERE!
:>Tomoko came storming in.
:>Listen up, all ah yah!
:>Tomoko wove her way drunkenly over to us.
:>And grabbed her brother's chest.
:>These are my boobies! Hands off you bitch!
:>You could hear the silence as those who had never heard of a draw lot play were made painfully aware of what they were in store for.
:>Bah! 
:>Makoto fired back.
:>Then yanked Tomoki from his sisters arms.
:>Tomoki is MINE! as if she'd want some limp wristed geisha like you!
:>Tomoko wasn't backing down.
:>I'll have you know I killed an ogre during my gempukku!
:>Well I killed an ONI!
:>Well I killed Oni no Akuma!

:>Wait.. wait... did you just say you had two gempukku?
:>YEAH! 
:>Tomoko pulled back the sleeves on her kimono and flexed her thin arms.
:>One for each of these manly arms of mine.
:>Mokoto reached out felt Tomoki's almost nonexistent biceps.
:>Whoah! Those are impressively manly!
:>Toshiro looked over at me.
:>Aren't we supposed to say something here?
:>He said it loudly enough the audience could hear.
:>I just smiled, chin resting on my hand.
:>I think so, but I'm having too much fun watching this...
:>Toshiro shrugged.
:>Fine, whatever...
:>Um...
:>Tomoki tried to speak up.
:>Makoto and Tomoko both wheeled on him and spoke in unison.
:>WHAT?!
:>Um.... I uh. I think I like Tomoko better, to be honest...
:>Toshiro elbowed me.
:>I think everyone saw.
:>Okay, fine fine...
:>I got up, almost lost my balance, and lurched over to the arguing trio.
:>I put my hand on Tomoki's shoulder
:>Tomoki, my beautiful daughter, you cannot marry Tomoko!
:>But why not father?!
:>Because... because... he's your sister!
:>I couldn't help but break out laughing as I said that, and then I really did lose my balance.
:>Toshiro stood up.
:>I'm not drunk enough for this.
:>Saji decided to get in on the act, and ran in with a cup of sake for Toshiro.
:>Thanks.
:>Toshiro downed it and threw the cup over his shoulder.
:>Okay, fuck it. We're all samurai here.
:>You and you.
:>He pointed to Makoto and Tomoko.
:>Just fight already. Winner gets the little girl.
:>Right!
:>Got it!
:>The two punched each other in their faces at the same time and fell over.
:>Toshiro looked around.
:>Well, since I'm the last one standing, guess I win.
:>Come on wife, let me show you your new home.
:>He grabbed Tomoki's hand and pulled him off the stage.

:>I looked out from where I had fallen at the audience.
:>The Unicorn were laughing so hard they had to hold their sides lest their guts come bursting out.
:>Everyone else was staring with the vacant look of one who has witnessed the aftermath of a battle for the first time.
:>I hoped at least one Crane would have nightmares about this the rest of their lives.
:>We all managed to get to our feet and bow to the audience.
:>The motion was too much for Tomoki, who vomited.
:>The perfect end to a perfect draw lot play.
:>Katsuie-sama was chuckling when we rejoined him.
:>I didn't think you would be quite so rough with the source material!
:>It was bland crap anyway Katsuie-sama!
:>He smiled.
:>I can't help but wonder how many courtiers are trying to figure out the hidden message right now.
:>Makoto looked at Katsuie-sama in surprise.
:>There was a hidden message?
:>He snorted. 
:>Of course not.
:>All they saw were a bunch of drunken Crabs butchering a script.
:>But courtiers have minds like mazes, and they cannot accept things are as simple as they seem.
:>He laughed out loud then.
:>No doubt we've muddied the waters quite a bit with that show!
:>Saji grinned.
:>Your suggestion to do a draw lot play was wonderfull, Katsuie-sama.
:>I looked over at Toshiro.
:>Did you hear that?
:>I did.
:>You think maybe the point was that there was no point?
:>If you just said what I think you just said, then I think you're right...
:>I have no idea what you just said, Toshiro.
:>We should go sleep this off.
:>Yeah, we should.
:>So we did.

:>I awoke with an impressive hangover.
:>Not even close to the Double Mind Fuck hangover, but still one worth remembering.
:>Naomi helped me to sit up, and gave me some water.
:>I gulped it down.
:>That was... an interesting performance.
:>Did you win?
:>No, it was the Crane Kabuki actors who did so.
:>It should have been you.
:>I love that song.
:>I know you do, that is why I chose it.
:>Do you think you want to join everyone for breakfast?
:>Yeah, I have to ask about last night.
:>Did you drink that much?
:>No, not that. Just want to make sure I didn't miss anything, is all.
:>I see.
:>You are certain you will be alright Ishigaki-kun?
:>I feel fine now.
:>The instant I stepped into the room where everyone was getting breakfast I had to run out onto the balcony and lean over.
:>I almost hit a peasant.
:>I pulled my head back while he was still staring in confusion, before he could think to look up.
:>Toshiro grinned at me.
:>Snuck up on you, didn't it?
:>A bit.
:>I drank some more water
:>So, let me see if I've got it right.
:>Last night the Dragon asked if the Lion want to join them.
:>The Lion said no.
:>And the Scorpion warned them to stay out of it altogether then...
:>Is that about right?
:>Kitsuki-san nodded.
:>Yes. 
:>Amano shot Kitsuki a look.
:>Most children could follow that much, were they training to be courtiers. there's no harm in confirming for him what everyone already knows.
:>I suppose you're right.
:>Amano ate some rice, then mused.
:>The Unicorn are guileless as always.
:>Kitsuki-san nodded.
:>I grunted. Probably why they had one of the better performances.
:>You call that wild jumping a good dance?
:>No, I suppose I should not be surprised.
:>I had thought you had at least some basic appreciation for art, after all.
:>I fired right back at Kitsuki-san.
:>I like honest art that doesn't try to hide what it's saying.
:>People at court are pretentious enough as is.
:>Making their art pretentious is just going overboard.
:>Kitsuki-san snorted.

:>Toshiro and I went to check up an Ayame.
:>She was practicing her basics, swinging a bokken over and over before the statue of Bishamon.
:>Such a thing would be pleasing to the fortune of strength.
:>So we held back, out of sight, until she finished.
:>Once she had returned to her neutral stance and held it for the proper length of time, she collapsed.
:>I've seen that before, plenty of times
:>Toshiro and I moved over to her.
:>Ishigaki-sama, Toshiro-sama?
:>Looks like she couldn't bring herself to use an improper honorific under the direct gaze of Bishamon, even though I had told her I preferred -san, if she had to honorific me at all.
:>Well, even Toshiro insisted in -saning me, even though he never corrected me when I addressed by name only.
:>I was the odd one here, preferring to be informal beyond even what most Crabs would find acceptable.
:>Oh well. 
:>Ayame-san, can you hold out your arm for me?
:>Uh, yes.
:>She did so. Her arm shook visibly.
:>Toshiro looked into her eyes.
:>Mm hmm.
:>What, what is it, Toshiro-sama?
:>Exhaustion.
:>You've pushed yourself far too hard.
:>How long have you been at it?
:>...
:>All night...?
:>Ayame looked away, a bit embarrassed.
:>I am sorry, I was worried about the possibility of the dreams returning so I could not sleep...
:>You need to sleep from time to time too, you know?
:>Yes, I am sorry.
:>I will try and get some sleep now, I am quite tired...
:>Good.
:>Once we were away Toshiro looked at me.
:>I think she's wrong.
:>Huh?
:>About why she couldn't sleep.
:>I nodded.
:>I see.
:>So, you had a plan to find the Tsukai?
:>Before Toshiro could answer angry shouts exploded from one the rooms we were passing.
:>We looked at one another, then went in to see what was going on.

:>Inside we found an Ikoma and a Soshi yelling at one another.
:>It was that same Soshi who spoke to me during the painting contest.
:>Both had long since abandoned any pretense, if there had ever been any to begin with, and now freely and openly insulting one another.
:>Well, a duel or two is not uncommon in a winter court. Samurai being samurai, tempers were bound to flare up sooner or later.
:>It was the Ikoma who drew his wakizashi first.
:>Drawing your blade when you're going to demand a duel to satisfy your honor is a fairly normal thing. 
:>Drawing your blade and stabbing someone who has upset you is not.
:>I reached out and grabbed his arm, just in case. 
:>He glared at me for a moment, trying to understand.
:>Then his rage cooled just enough that he did, so I let go.
:>I can bear your lies no longer Scorpion! I will have satisfaction!
:>It was at that exact moment the heads of the Scorpion and Lion delegations entered the room.
:>Well, that was far too convenient, especially when there's Scorpion involved.
:>The Soshi smiled. 
:>Then, if Bayushi-sama will allow it, I accept your challenge.
:>All eyes turned to Bayushi-sama.
:>Hands folded inside of sleeves, a voluminous Kimono concealed everything else.
:>And Bayushi-sama wore a wedding veil for a mask.
:>I'll allow it.
:>That voice could have belonged to a man, or a woman...
:>Toshiro leaned in and whispered to me.
:>How much you want to bet that there is no 'Bayushi-sama' and that all the Scorpion take turns in that outfit?
:>Hah. Wouldn't surprise me at all if you're right. 
:>The Soshi woman nodded.
:>Then Bayushi Kentaro will be my champion.
:>As long as Ikoma-sama gives his permission for this duel, of course.
:>The younger Ikoma looked at his senior.
:>Ikoma-sama had a long thin beard down to his chest, that he stroked a few times, while he tried to work out what the Scorpion were up to.
:>He nodded at last.

:>The young Ikoma smilled.
:>Then I will have Akodo Yo-
:>Ikoma-sama cut him off.
:>No, you will not.
:>Yoshi-san is far too busy with other duties to spend time on such a trivial matter.
:>Toshiro whispered again.
:>In other words 'I don't know what the Scorpion are up to so I'm not letting you put our best warrior in harm's way'.
:>The young Ikoma stared, open mouthed.
:>He looked around.
:>Judging by his expression, most of the other Lion must be only fair duelists.
:>Since Shoshi had named Kentaro without hesitation, he was likely very good.
:>I saw Kakita Sakurada begin to stand up.
:>Then I saw the Soshi smile, faintly, before turning her face back to a blank slate.
:>Well shit, they'd walked right into it.
:>Before Sakurada could speak, I did.
:>I'll be your champion.
:>Heads whipped in my direction, I was surprised I didn't hear the sound of breaking necks.
:>Toshiro was staring at me as I'd just peeled of my stolen Ishigaki skin and revealed myself to be a bog hag.
:>The Ikoma looked me up and down.
:>You?
:>Yeah. Me.
:>And why would I choose you?
:>Because there isn't anyone in this room who thought I would offer.
:>Not.
:>One.
:>The young Ikoma realized what I was getting at.
:>He nodded.
:>Very well then!
:>I leaned in, putting my head next to the young Ikoma's ear, with my back turned to the Scorpion.
:>Ask her to be very specific with the terms.
:>I know.
:>Now then, your right as the challenged?
:>Isn't it obvious? Iaijutsu to the first blood!
:>Those are your only terms then? Fine.
:>Our champions shall meet outside in fifteen minutes! 
:>I headed for my room.
:>It took twenty five minutes to complete the ritual to don one's armor.
:>Skipping steps was dangerous, as the ritual also made sure the pieces would overlap properly.
:>And of course, it invited bad luck.
:>Unless, of course, you were a Crab.
:>Ten minutes later, I was fully dressed and on my way outside.
:>This wasn't cheating, not really.
:>It was the Shoshi's fault for not specifying whether or not armor would be allowed.

:>Of course I was stretching it. 
:>That was just a technicality, and I was insulting the spirit of the Iaijutsu duel.
:>Worst case scenario the aggrieved Crane have to have a flower arranging contest to see who gets first crack at me.
:>But then I arrived and realized I was safe.
:>A figure in dark, blood red and black armor was already waiting for me.
:>Bayushi Kentaro.
:>Hah, so the Scorpion didn't specify no armor because they had the same plan as I did.
:>So now I look like a genius for figuring out their plan and countering it.
:>I didn't, but I had no problem letting everyone think I did.
:>We took up our positions.
:>Shit.
:>He wasn't just relying on his armor.
:>It was still early morning, the rising sun was behind his shoulder.
:>With his dark armor all I could see was a silhouette.
:>Well, whatever.
:>I am Hida Ishigaki, student of the Hida Ryu and Defender of the Wall.
:>I am Bayushi Kentaro, of the Bayushi Ryu, and one of Saigo's blades.
:>I wonder what that meant.
:>We took our stances.
:>As I suspected, I was heavily outclassed.
:>But Kentaro was in a suit of O-Yori. It would slow him down just a bit.
:>And this was a duel to first blood, not the first hit.
:>I focused myself, seeking out that perfect harmony.
:>And then Kentaro hit me.
:>Strike first, strike last.
:>He was a master, that was obvious.
:>But as his blade passed, there was no blood on it.
:>As I had hoped. He couldn't quite cut me.
:>I returned the strike.
:>I dimly heard a few people already shouting foul.
:>Kentaro hadn't let his guard down, and he twisted around as I attacked.
:>I missed.
:>Nimble little shit, and fast.
:>We stepped back from one another as spectators shouted.
:>I shouted back.
:>I'M NOT BLEEDING!
:>The young Ikoma I was championing shouted then.
:>Look at Kentaro-san's blade! No blood!
:>So we had to keep going.
:>My position was improved, but not by much.
:>Damn he's fast!
:>But we were no longer trying to outdraw one another.
:>I covered up, and deflected his swings.

:>I backed away and circled, getting the sun out of my eyes, while allowing my training to guide me.
:>Kentaro pressed on, shifting from two hands to a one hand and back..
:>I gave ground before his assault.
:>And found what I was looking for.
:>My foot slid, just a bit, on a patch of ice hidden under the snow.
:>Kentaro began to circle around me again, putting the sun behind him once more.
:>Then, I didn't just deflect his attack.
:>I caught it on my own blade.
:>And I shoved. Hard.
:>He stepped back from my push.
:>Onto the ice.
:>As his foot skidded out from under him, I attacked.
:>His armor would shield him, so I attacked with all my might.
:>I had to make him bleed, here and now.
:>I wouldn't get another chance.
:>As I struck, my momentum pushed him on the ice, and he fell.
:>I pulled my blade back, and felt flesh, not metal beneath it.
:>Red droplets fell to the snow from my katana.
:>...
:>...
:>...
:>I just pissed of the Scorpion.