Editing Memories of a Stone Wall (section)

===Act XXXII: Ishigaki Mura===
:>I couldn't help stare as my home came into view.
:>Probably because there was a new building that looked suspiciously like an inn right where the old inn of Ishigaki Mura had stood.
:>Naomi giggled as I stared.
:>Surprise, Ishigaki-kun.
:>H-how did we afford all this?
:>Assistance from Satoshi-san's wife mostly. We will be paying her back for a while, so it may be some time before I can give you any real spending money...
:>But for now at least, we have some income to hire enough servants to look after the children and a Gokenin to run things while I'm away.
:>As we approached, the door to my home opened and a man I didn't recognize stepped out.
:>How bowed to us.
:>Welcome Home, master, mistress.
:>Ishigaki-kun, this is our new Gokenin, Kakeguchi Shino-san.
:>I am pleased to meet you at last, master.
:>I bowed to cover up for the fact that I had to search my memory for the name.
:>Oh, right! Kakeguchi was a Vassal family of the Hida, their founder had been one of the first to follow Hida, right along with Kuni, Kaiu, and Hiruma.
:>You could always count on a Kakeguchi for steadfast loyalty.
:>I looked at Naomi again.
:>Okay, when did you get all this done?
:>Well, the Yasuki I mentioned, who I knew could help get the sake works running, he handled most of the hands on things.
:>Like recommending Shino-san here.
:>Toshiro perked up a bit at the mention of a sake works.
:>Shino spoke up.
:>Sadly that will have to wait. It's a day to the nearest source of fresh water, save for the well here.
:>Naomi smiled, pleased that her plan to rebuild Ishigaki Mura had commenced.
:>I set all this in motion secretly before we left, I wanted to surprise you when we got home!
:>Well, I'm very surprised.
:>This is wonderfull, Naomi.
:>I meant it. I could care less about the income, but we needed it so we could provide for some ji-samurai to protect the children while we were away.
:>But of course, with more income came more expense just managing it all.
:>Money could become a vicious cycle.

:>We all got our things unpacked as the children ran about trying meet all the new people.
:>I was thankful I only heard "TITS!" once during all that.
:>Naomi frowned at me.
:>I thought I told you to handle that, Ishigaki-kun.
:>I shrugged at threw up my hands.
:>Best I could do!
:>She sighed.
:>Fine. I will have a talk with them.
:>I saw Naomi take the seeds Katsuie-sama had gifted her and go off.
:>Hey now, didn't you hire that Shino guy so you wouldn't have to work as hard?
:>She blinked at me.
:>Figuring out where to plant the tea leaves, and when, is not hard Ishigaki-kun...
:>Just, take it easy, okay?
:>Hai, Hai. I shall endeavor to obey, my husband.
:>She disappeared down the hall.
:>She was very good at ignoring me when it suited her.
:>Fortunately, it only rarely suited her.
:>Unfortunately, when it did it was usually because she felt I was babying her.
:>I mean, I was...
:>But given her health, and her condition, she deserved to be babied.
:>I went and sat down in the garden, watching the handful of servants go about tending to menial chores.
:>I was feeling just bit like a stranger in my own home.
:>Toshiro thumpdraged up beside me, saving me from having to think any more on this.
:>He had a bottle of sake with him.
:>So, Toshiro.
:>Yeah?
:>Since Naomi is really doing it, would you like to build a new home here?
:>He looked over at me.
:>I have a duty though.
:>Oh, right.
:>The lands of the Kuni family had been swallowed by the forces of the Maw, just as the lands of the Hiruma had.
:>But the Crab Clan had retaken the Kuni lands.
:>However, the mark of the time spent under the influence of the shadowlands had left the Kuni provinces deeply tainted.
:>So the family did the only thing they could.
:>They burned the taint from the land, killing it completely.
:>Now the Kuni family slowly, painstakingly, nurtured the kami.
:>Setting to the task of restoring the so called Kuni Wastes back to thriving, prosperous land.
:>After centuries, they had only just begun.

:>Don't get me wrong Ishigaki-san, I'll come whenever you need me.
:>It's a slow process, so it's not as though I have to be constantly grooming the kami.
:>But still.
:>Yeah, I gotcha.
:>I watched someone I didn't know run down the length of the outer walkway, polishing the wood.
:>I gulped down my sake.
:>Toshiro refilled my cup and waited.
:>...
:>It feels odd.
:>Naomi is the one who set all this up, who is managing all this.
:>But still that person there is my servant as well. And I don't even know their name.
:>You'd just forget it anyway. You're terrible with names.
:>I am not!
:>Yeah? What's Monkey's name then?
:>Uhhh. Sa, shu... Shotokan?
:>Shugoki?
:>...Sadane!
:>Toshiro rolled his eyes.
:>I've been working on it, dammit!
:>My journals have everyone's name down!
:>Pfft. How often do you get the characters wrong?
:>Not... very often. I think.
:>I bet the fact that you get the names right at all is because you always go back to double check, isn't it?
:>...
:>...
:>... yeah.
:>Alright then.
:>I scowled.
:>I was going to at least get introduced to all these new faces.
:>I went and found Naomi and Shino.
:>Hey, Shino-san.
:>I'd like to meet all the servants.
:>Of course, Ishigaki-sama.
:>Oh, and the ones running the inn as well!
:>Hai!
:>One he had rounded them all up he introduced me one by one.
:>We had a half dozen servants for the household chores and babysitting, and another five ran the inn.
:>An elderly woman, a bit plump and blind in one eye, ran the inn. Her daughter and son in-law managed the kitchen and the other two cleaned rooms and whatnot.
:>After they were all introduced I bid them to rise.
:>Really didn't need Nana One-Eye to pull something like bowing to me.
:>I've been informed that i'm terrible with names, so if I forget yours or end up making a nickname for you don't think too much on it, okay?
:>A chorus of 'as you say great samurai' followed.
:>Now then, does everyone have a weapon?
:>By imperial edict, peasants may not carry weapons.

:>The exceptions being Ashigaru, who were soldiers, and budoka.
:>Budoka were peasants who would take up weapons and follow the code of Bushido, and answered to the Doshin, who were most often Samurai.
:>These two formed the lowest rung of law enforcement, and were the primary leg breakers when someone needed to be subdued.
:>But, as is often the case, things are a bit different in the lands of the Crab.
:>Every Crab peasant carries a weapon.
:>Kama, parangu, jo, sai, tonfa.
:>Simple one handed weapons, though of course never anything that is only for the hands of Samurai.
:>That's just what they carry on their person.
:>Every peasant also knows where the polearms and spears are kept.
:>If the things of the shadowlands get their hands on flesh to eat, they can settle into and are for some time.
:>And the Samurai sometimes have their hands full dealing with the worst threats.
:>If you see a Crab peasant, there is a good chance they have killed before.
:>It's a good thing to bear in mind, if you've a tendency to be cruel to peasants.
:>Everyone pulled out their weapons and showed me.
:>I nodded.
:>Even Nana One-Eye had a jo she used as a cane.
:>Old peasants always stoop over for some reason.
:>Okay then. All of you wait here a moment.
:>There was one last thing I wanted my peasants to have.
:>I went to the storeroom and opened the box where we kept our jade.
:>I got out 11 fingers.
:>Then put holes through one end of each, and put them on silk cords.
:>I came back and handed everyone their new finger of jade.
:>All of you wear those around your necks at all times.
:>For starters, it'll make it hard for hags and the like to infiltrate if everyone is always touching jade.
:>Understand?
:>Nods.
:>Good.
:>That's it.
:>They went back to their jobs.
:>Shino arched an eyebrow.
:>When the village truly begins to grow I do not believe we will be able to give jade to every peasant.
:>I know Shino-san.
:>But every servant in THIS house will, and I want it to be a custom at the inn that every guest gets tested.

:>Of course with all these new people about it was both easier, and harder to get private time with Naomi.
:>On the one hand, Daiko and Tetsute had several new playmates
:>On the other hand, the servants always seemed to find something to do, even if it was to scrub an already spotless floor.
:>I guess that they preferred working in a Samurai's home to working in a field or quarry, so they worked harder than they had to.
:>I told a few it was fine for them to rest if there was nothing for them to do in the moment.
:>Then nodded, bowed, and went straight back to work.
:>Alright, they were just going to pretend there was always something for them to do.
:>Well, that was fine I guess.
:>I made up for the lack of privacy during the day by viciously cuddling Naomi all night long instead.
:>Little by little she began to plump up.
:>Bit by bit her strength began to ebb.
:>Nana One-Eye came around with various dishes and concoctions she said could help with that.
:>I have seen many women swell up with babies in my long life, great samurai!
:>These will help her gain strength, and pass it on to the child!
:>Toshiro looked at one dish.
:>Hmmm. Looks awful.
:>He sniffed at it.
:>Bleah!
:>Smells even worse!
:>I stared at the concoction in horror.
:>Toshiro however, smiled.
:>Only good medicine could be that foul!
:>HAI! It is just as you say, great samurai!
:>I winced as the two took the contents of the Cauldron of Doom in to feed Naomi.
:>I couldn't bear to watch....

:>One by one, the others began to arrive.
:>Mantis-san first, then Monkey.
:>Kitsuki-san was last.
:>I came out to meet him, as he stared at the inn.
:>Then he shot me a grin, pleased on my behalf.
:>I grinned back.
:>Akiko makes these delicious fried rice balls.
:>The outside is a lightly crispy, and the rice inside becomes very gooey and sweet.
:>The kids love it, and the best part is I don't know of any ninja technique to stay hidden in a rice ball that's being deep fried!
:>And? How's Naomi-sama doing?
:>... Better than when she had Daiko, but not by much.
:>He nodded somberly.
:>We went inside.
:>I explained as we walked.
:>The good thing about all these peasants is that Naomi always has someone to talk to about different things.
:>He arched an eyebrow at me.
:>I know there are some things she wouldn't want to discuss with me. Things I wouldn't understand, or things that she thinks would burden me.
:>Ah, yes, that does sound just like her.
:>I nodded.
:>Nana One-Eye has some old peasant remedies that Naomi swears help.
:>...Nana One-Eye?
:>The old peasant woman who runs the inn... you'll know her when you see her.
:>... I see.
:>And like I said, all the people to talk to keeps her from going stir crazy even though she can't move around very well.
:>How much longer, do you think?
:>Two months, two and half?
:>Do you have a lead, Kitsuki-san?
:>I had opted not to be present for the interrogation of the Soshitsukai.
:>As Shoji insisted, we waited for the jade petal tea to run it's course, once it had, she burned at the touch of jade.
:>Kitsuki-san decided to take care of the interrogation and the acquisition of her confession at the same time.
:>In Rokugan, a Samurai could not be punished for a crime until they had confessed.
:>Once enough evidence had been gathered though, it was permissible to...'persuade' the samurai to admit their guilt.
:>I had no problem with the brutality of war, the savagery of siege engines.

:>But battles were hot, the blood pounding in your head as your warrior spirit swells.
:>I had no taste for the cold, clinical application of pain.
:>Kitsuki-san nodded.
:>Yes, I think I do.
:>Everyone else is here already?
:>Yeah.
:>We entered into the room I shared with Naomi.
:>A table had been brought in, so that when she was feeling well everyone could gather around her.
:>She was certainly putting on quite the brave face for everyone.
:>Sitting up sipping her tea. Smiling and giggling at Mantis-san's stories and Monkey's antics.
:>But I knew that she had been up all night with a fever, sweating heavily.
:>I knew she was several shades paler than she should be.
:>I knew she was skinnier than a woman 7 months pregnant ought to be, no matter how many people assured me some women just never seem to put on that much weight.
:>Of course, everyone in this room knew all those things as well.
:>They just pretended they didn't.
:>Naomi didn't want to be fussed over too much, so they encouraged her by being normal.
:>What no one aside from Naomi, Toshiro and myself knew was that our new child was also not as energetic as their older siblings.
:>Naomi had joked that Daiko and Tetsute had been practicing juijutsu inside her, as often as they kicked and squirmed.
:>This one seemed to be saving their strength though.
:>Kitsuki-san bowed to Naomi.
:>Naomi-sama, you're looking quite energetic today.
:>Oh, hardly Takeshi-san, hardly!
:>But having all my dear friends about gives me more strength.
:>Daiko came up and gave Kitsuki-san a bow.
:>She held it only a hair's breadth too long, too.
:>Kitsuki-san returned the bow.
:>Well, hello there Daiko-chan! You've gotten even bigger now haven't you?
:>And how old are you now?
:>I'M THREE!
:>She stood up straight and proud, thrusting her tiny hand out with three fingers held up.
:>I'm a VEWY big girl!

:>Naomi had begun to teach Daiko numbers and colors now, and was quite pleased with herself.
:>Daiko insisted on showing everyone how much she could do, what she had learned, every chance she got.
:>Tetsute, a year younger, was nevertheless trying to compete with his sister.
:>He also claimed he was three.
:>And held up all his fingers.
:>From both hands.
:>I hoped he grew out of that soon.
:>Sunda Mizu had special ways of dealing with students who overestimated their own abilities.
:>I had learned that the hard way.
:>Every student of Sunda Mizu carves their name upon the walls of that dojo.
:>Classes group up together, a show of solidarity.
:>It is considered auspicious if you can get your name near the name of a great hero of the clan.
:>When it came time for my class to carve their names, I made mine on an empty wall.
:>So that there would be plenty of space around my name when I became a great hero.
:>Sensei had smiled then.
:>And handed me a shovel.
:>I spent the next three days digging holes and filling them in again.
:>Sensei said it was training, to build up strong muscles and endurance.
:>This much is nothing for a great hero like yourself, after all!
:>Kitsuki-san glanced at me, and I nodded.
:>I had one of the servants take Daiko and Tetsute out to get some of those fried rice balls.
:>It was time to discuss some adult things.

:>Well then, let's get started.
:>The first thing we learned from the Soshi is that THEY are, in fact, bloodspeakers.
:>Well, we had suspected that, but now we know it to be true.
:>Of course, the different cells do try to limit their contact with one another.
:>For exactly this reason: if one should be caught they cannot tell what they do not know.
:>Nods from around the room. We had been struggling against that very fact for some time now.
:>Mantis-san spoke up.
:>So then, how much did that one know?
:>Not enough, not enough by far.
:>However, she did have some tidbits, mostly things she suspected.
:>And I've been working on piecing them together.
:>I think I may have identified another cell.
:>We all perked up
:>This one seems to be mobile.
:>There are outbreaks of strife, discord... bandits and peasant rebellions in places they just shouldn't be.
:>They quiet for a few months, then another outbreak nearby.
:>If I'm right, the cell should be making it's way into Kitsu lands soon, if they're not there already.
:>I frowned, and glanced at Naomi.
:>We have time yet, Ishigaki-san.
:>Like I said, it becomes quiet for a time. This cell covers it's tracks well, and lays low right after stirring things up.
:>Why do you think it took me this long to get just that little bit of information?
:>If we rushed in now, we'd only serve to scare them off.
:>Best to wait until their plans are in motion, so they are less likely to scatter at our arrival.
:>We want to strike as hard a blow as we can, after all.
:>Monkey shook his head.
:>Just like pulling weeds. You've got to get the whole root, or it's just going to grow right back.
:>Exactly, Satoshi-san.
:>Then Monkey brightened.
:>Well, that's good then! I didn't want to miss Ishigaki-san pretending to be a pregnant woman!
:>Who knows how many chances we'll get to see that?
:>Around the table there were emphatic nods of agreement.
:>Even Naomi giggled behind her hand.
:>I looked at Toshiro.
:>His lips and cheeks puffed up a bit, and he looked away from me.

:>The time for my act came sooner than it should have.
:>By nearly a month.
:>I was playing with Daiko and Tetsute in the garden when a cry came up from the house.
:>As I opened the door to enter, one of the servants was already there with a futon.
:>I shot a glance to our room.
:>It's too soon!
:>All the more reason for you to hurry, great samurai!
:>A child that comes early is even more at risk!
:>I grabbed to futon and got to work, all thoughts of embarrassment gone.
:>I had to distract and confuse the evil spirits. Toshiro would do his part as well, but he had his hands full attending the birth.
:>I felt glad for Nana One-Eye, as she had no doubt dealt with things like this many times in her long life.
:>The others set about helping to boil water, looking for anything to do so their nervous energy would have a proper outlet.
:>This time, my own faked bellows were the loudest thing in the house.
:>Always before, this part had been rather noisy.
:>I walked my patrol, luring kansen and other evil spirits away from my wife and child, and tried very hard not to think about what that might mean.
:>My moaning was interrupted by a servant.
:>It is over now, great samurai.
:>...
:>Try though I might, I could not hear the usual first cries of an infant.
:>I tossed aside the futon and ran into our room.
:>Past servants carrying out bloody bedding.
:>Inside I saw Naomi laying, unmoving and eyes closed.
:>Nana One-Eye was wiping sweat from Naomi's forehead, so my wife was alive, at least.
:>Then I saw Toshiro, holding a small ugly white blob.
:>He handed it to me without a word.
:>It was not nearly as much a blob as it should have been, and it certainly wasn't making any of the noises I'd come to expect small ugly blobs to make.
:>But it's eyes were open, and it looked at me.
:>I held out a finger.
:>It looked, then grabbed it
:>I felt almost no strength in that grip.
:>Yet the little blob did not let go.
:>It held on, clinging stubbornly, with everything it had.

:>I sat down next to Naomi, holding my little blob.
:>You've got another son, Ishigaki-san.
:>He was still hanging on to my finger.
:>He blrghbled at me, making little spit bubbles.
:>Then coughed.
:>One tiny little cough.
:>Nana One-Eye looked up at me.
:>Until I met you, great samurai, the largest boy I had ever known was born early and small.
:>I looked up, a little surprised.
:>How big he gets hardly matters to me.
:>I just want him to grow up.
:>I looked over at Naomi.
:>Toshiro answered before I could ask.
:>She's not in any danger right now.
:>But I think she should just rest for some time.
:>How much time?
:>Can't say. Months, at least.
:>I nodded.
:>I'd be lying if I said I didn't want more children.
:>But, three would be enough.
:>Yes, three will do just fine.
:>I glanced over to the door, and saw two little faces peering in.
:>I glanced at Toshiro, who nodded.
:>You two, come in and meet your little brother, Tsuyosa.
:>Toshiro and Nana One-Eye left us alone.
:>I moved Naomi's head to my lap, Daiko and Tetsute curled up on either side of their mother, and I cradled a sleeping Tsuyosa.
:>I was worried about Naomi and Tsuyosa, of course.
:>But I was also quite happy.
:>It could have been much worse.
:>Yes, this was more than enough.
:>If I could just keep this much I wouldn't dare ask for anything more.

:>Naomi had been terribly weakened by the birth.
:>It led to some awkward fumbling when it was time to feed Tsuyosa.
:>I ended up sitting behind Naomi, supporting her with my chest and holding my arms under hers, to help support him.
:>Ishigaki-kun, we both know you are the one really holding him. Just let go of my hands.
:>No.
:>He's your son too; you should hold him as well.
:>I'm your strength, as you are mine, Hana-chan.
:>She closed her eyes and smiled.
:>I glanced down when my arms started to cramp up.
:>Is he not full yet?
:>It would seem this one has just as large an appetite as his siblings.
:>Yeah, seems like it. That's good then.
:>Hai.
:>Tsuyosa finally let go. I laid him down just long enough to wipe the dribble up and close up Naomi's kimono.
:>Ow!
:>Sorry.
:>No, it's okay. It's just a little tender after meal time...
:>Tsuyosa had already began to squirm about by the time I scooped him up.
:>I could recognize when a baby needed good burping by now.
:>I held my son to my chest, his chin on my shoulder and gently patted at his back.
:>Blurrrghp.
:>...
:>Oh.
:>Oh my.
:>Naomi. Is that what it feels like?
:>Yes, it is.
:>Ah. yes. Naomi handled most of the burping herself, so I had completely forgotten how often that bit came along with it.
:>I wiped his little mouth and laid him down in Naomi's lap as I stepped out to get changed.
:>I almost knocked Toshiro over as I was leaving.
:>I must be very distracted, to have missed his thumpdraging.
:>He had a few sticks of incense in his hand.
:>Toshiro followed my gaze.
:>The smoke is medicinal. It will give strength to their lungs, help them get more Air.
:>That seems...counterintuitive, Toshiro.
:>I know. But it works. Some of the best medicine is stuff most people would never try.
:>Every hear of the Togashi monk that got poisoned by a Scorpion? Guy took MORE poison to cure himself.
:>I stared at Toshiro in horror.
:>Oh, don't give me that look.

:>Look, the point I'm making is that because of him the rest of us now know the difference between poison and medicine is often just a matter of how much you take.
:>And I know you know that. You've learned enough about medicine because of Naomi-san's illness that you do.
:>I sighed, then shook my head.
:>You're right, Toshiro. You're always right.
:>Thank you for indulging my baseless fears.
:>Hey.
:>He looked me in the eyes.
:>I don't blame you.
:>So it's no big deal.
:>I nodded.
:>I turned to head down the hall, ignoring the 'whoa!' that came from over my shoulder.
:>After I got changed and handed my soiled kimono off to a servant, I joined the others for a lunch of my own.
:>Monkey asked first.
:>How are they?
:>I sat down with a sigh as Mantis-san passed me a bowl of rice.
:>Naomi is quite weak. Can barely sit up on her own.
:>Tsuyosa is eating a lot, at least. Good appetite, like Daiko and Tetsute.
:>Monkey gave me a encouraging grin
:>Yeah, you're the toughest guy I know!
:>No way your kid would let a little thing like being born early keep him down!
:>It was still far to soon to predict something like that, but I wasn't about to invite bad luck by pointing it out.
:>Instead I looked over at Kitsuki-san.
:>How long until we need to leave?
:>... three weeks would be ideal, but I came here prepared to wait another five.
:>We'll leave in three then.
:>... You sure?
:>Yeah.
:>Naomi and I had already talked about this.
:>We both knew there was no way she would be ready to go chasing after a bloodspeaker cell on Kitsuki-san's time frame, even if everything had gone perfectly.
:>And she would blame herself if he waited around on her account and that delay cost people their lives.
:>Kitsuki-san looked at me evenly.
:>Okay then.
:>I finished up my lunch, then found Daiko and Tetsute.
:>We played until the two were exhausted.
:>I went back to our room, a sleeping child under each arm.
:>Naomi was asleep, Tsuyosa beside her.
:>I put the two I had down in a little pile next to her and covered them up.

:>I sat and sipped a cup of sake, letting the rice wine warm my body as I watched my family sleep.
:>Tsuyosa woke up first, squirming a bit.
:>Cough.
:>Just that one little cough.
:>I scooped him up before he could wake any of the others.
:>There were tears in Naomi's eyes.
:>I took Tsuyosa outside.
:>He was pale, more fair skinned like his mother so I kept him out of the sunlight directly.
:>Fortunately for him, a six foot plus slab of papa makes a real good piece of portable shade.
:>I sat down next to the koi pond with him, holding him so his feet were in the water.
:>He giggled and kicked at the sensation.
:>I always enjoyed the look on my children's faces when they found something new.
:>Well then, Tsuyosa, we need to have a talk. Man to man.
:>Gubwha?
:>Yes, you're right. I see you're a bright boy aren't you?
:>Then you understand why I need to know if you have what your mother has.
:>If you do, then bushi school is right out.
:>His head began to droop a bit, so I laid him down on the grass, stretching out beside him.
:>My body cast a shadow over him, keeping him cool.
:>He trashed his arms and legs in the grass, smiling and making spit bubbles.
:>And then one little cough.
:>You see? Right there.
:>There's no question you're sick.
:>Yet you hardly seem bothered at all by it.
:>You are a direct descendant of the Fortune of Fire and Thunder, so it shouldn't bother you at all.
:>You are a Hida, and we're predisposed to big frames and big muscles.
:>I tickled his side and he laughed.
:>You're a bit tiny, but you also came earlier than you should have...
:>And of course, our clan has a deep connection to the Earth.
:>And then there's all the medicine from Toshiro and Nana One-Eye. They're both quite experienced, and Toshiro has been helping to look after your mother for some time now.
:>I had one other thought, one I wouldn't say out loud.
:>Not even to a garden that was empty save an infant still incapable of understanding words.
:>And a few boringly sober fish.

:>That thought was, of course, about how much care Naomi would really have received for her illness during her childhood.
:>Given what I knew about Shoji, I was almost certain the answer was: None at all.
:>So, it could very well be Tsuyosa had inherited his mother's illness.
:>It seemed equally likely that he would not be as severely affected by it.
:>I spoke to my son again.
:>So, I think we should keep you away from any bushi schools, but beyond that...
:>What do you think, Tsuyosa?
:>Courtier? Send you off to train with the Yasuki?
:>Kaiu? Hmmm. What do you think of being one of the Kaiu battlemasters? Fine strategists, every General in the Crab armies has at least one battlemaster on their personal staff.
:>Or, would you like to train as a shugenja?
:>I imagine we'd have little choice but to give you over to Toshiro for that. Could you handle the earth kami, even though you're a bit sick?
:>Little to soon to be thinking about things like that, I'd say.
:>Toshiro thumpdragged his way into the garden and sat down beside us both.
:>Tsuyosa had worn himself out squirming about at all these new feelings, and had drifted back to sleep.
:>I scooped him up and cradled him in my lap.
:>It's all part of my strategy Toshiro.
:>Wat.
:>If I can just get him to tell me what he wants to be when he grows up, then I can make him promise that he'll grow up...
:>Toshiro looked at me.
:>Didn't you just get done listing off all the reasons why he'll be fine?
:>Yeah, I did.
:>Didn't help.
:>I know you're a good shugenja, I know you've got practice. I know between you're earth magic and Naomi's water magic there's very little the two of you can't treat.
:>But...
:>Toshiro nodded.
:>Emotions are a real pain in the ass at times. Never listening to reason.
:>You got that right, Toshiro.
:>...
:>And that only made me wonder what I was going to do for Naomi.
:>I took Tsuyosa back to the room and took a nap along with my family.
:>All this worrying was wearing me out.

:>I was awakened from my nap by three hungry children
:>I took the two older ones to the kitchen and got them some lunch/dinner/growing child snacktimething.
:>I left them there, happily munching away, and returned to check up on Naomi and Tsuyosa
:>I crept up as quietly as I could.
:>Not very, all things considered.
:>But then the person I was sneaking up on, if I was right, had a lot on their mind and would be very distracted.
:>I peered in through the door.
:>Sometimes I really hate being right.
:>Naomi was feeding Tsuyosa, and weeping openly.
:>I could just make her sobbing 'I'm sorry' to him, over and over.
:>Well...
:>Great.
:>I could sit out here and think all day and never figure out the magic words to make her feel better, so I just went on inside and hugged her, hugged them both, from behind.
:>I really did catch her off guard; Naomi looked over her shoulder in complete surprise, tears running down her cheeks.

:>Ishigaki?
:>What are... why...?
:>Obviously, Naomi had thought she could keep her feelings hidden from me.
:>Now she was struck speechless in surprise that I had caught her red handed.
:>I answered her by giving her very light squeeze with my arms.
:>The squeeze forced more tears, and she broke out sobbing again.
:>Let me go!
:>Squeeze.
:>I do not deserve your love!
:>Squeeze.
:>Stop...!
:>Squeeze.
:>Look what I did to our son!
:>Glance.
:>Tsuyosa had finished eating already, and was nuzzled into her breast, fast asleep.
:>Oh no how horrible.
:>Wha?
:>Letting him nap using the best breasts in the Empire as a pillow.
:>Huh? What?
:>Squeeze.
:>There had been just a tiny note of hope in that last what.
:>I understood what was going on now.
:>All those years that Naomi had been used as a punching post by her father had with a seriously damaged sense of self worth.
:>It had taken not just me, but all of us, years to get her to stop saying she was a burden on us.
:>Now confronted with Tsuyosa's illness, she had slid back into those old habits.
:>Damn you Shoji.
:>Not even here and still fucking things up
:>This wound Naomi bore was an emotional one.
:>An ephemeral thing, difficult to treat.
:>But I had to try, lest she spiral down into one of the Nine Types.
:>There was much I could endure. But the way my body reacted at just the thought of her receiving the treatment for that told me that was NOT something I could endure.
:>I lifted the sleeping baby from her arms and laid him gently down, covering him with a light blanket.
:>I wiped his slobber off her and closed up her kimono.
:>She didn't protest, or do much of anything really.
:>That bit of hope I heard, that desire to be reassured this wasn't her fault, had given me hope.
:>But the reality was she was even worse off than I thought.
:>Tsuyosa squirmed a bit, gave one tiny cough and the settled back into his sleep.
:>The second he did so, she clutched at her chest as though she had been shot with an arrow.
:>Ah. I see.

:>Naomi was the kind of person who would endure great pain without a word of complaint.
:>Indeed, she would push herself TOO hard if you let her, and put her own well being at risk.
:>Yet she could not bear the sight of someone else suffering from so much as a stubbed toe.
:>Now she was reliving all the pain her own disease had caused her, and imagining Tsuyosa going through that.
:>No wonder she was so distraught.
:>Well, it also gave me a place to start.
:>I pulled her back into a hug, holding her head against my chest.
:>Do I look like your father to you?
:>She looked up at me, confused by my rhetorical question.
:>You heard me Naomi.
:>I want to know:
:>How much of the pain of your childhood was caused by your illness?
:>And how much was caused by your father's rejection?
:>Ah...!
:>I gave her a squeeze to drive the point home.
:>How many times must I explain this to you?
:>Some people, like me, have strong bodies and weak minds.
:>Squeeze.
:>Some people, like Kitsuki-san, have the opposite, strong minds and weaker bodies..
:>Squeeze.
:>Many people are like you and Toshiro, with a great strength in one or two elements, while being weaker in the others.
:>Squeeze.
:>Strength and weakness come in many many different types.
:>What truly matters is strength or weakness of CHARACTER.
:>Squeeze.
:>Are you planning on raising our son to be a shallow, selfish asshole?
:>NO!
:>I pulled her chin up to look me in the eyes.
:>THEN YOU HAVE NOT WRONGED HIM.

:>She was clutching at my kimono.
:>I could tell Naomi wanted to believe me.
:>Now that the skirmishers had lured the enemy to the field of my choosing, it was time to send in the heavy infantry.
:>Didn't you once tell me that there must be balance in all things?
:>Um, yes?
:>I nodded.
:>Right, you said that in order for a Fortune to give their blessing to someone, they MUST curse someone else.
:>Didn't you say that knowing another person would be able to live a long, healthy life made your illness bearable to you?
:>That is because it does!
:>I nodded again.
:>So, then. Jurojin MUST pass our blessings and curses equally because that's just how the universe works.
:>She nodded.
:>Look at him, Naomi.
:>She looked at Tsuyosa.
:>Yes, he was born early and small.
:>Yes he coughs.
:>But it's only ever one cough.
:>I've not yet seen him spit up blood, have you?
:>No.
:>So don't you think a Hida, a descendant of Osono-Wo, will be able to bear an illness far better than a Phoenix girl?
:>Especially when he has a loving family that will see to it he gets the very best care and medicine from the very beginning?
:>She looked up sharply.
:>She was reeling. Time to strike the final blow.
:>I braced myself.
:>I was going to have to be cruel to be kind.
:>What? It hasn't ever occurred to you?
:>Naomi, Toshiro is an Earth Shugenja, but your father is an Earth Tensai.
:>Toshiro may be a smart man, but the Phoenix clan prides itself on KNOWLEDGE, not just it's magical power.
:>Did it really never occur to you that if he was able to discover a better medicine for you in as short a time as he spent looking in to it, that your Clan would not have been able to do so as well?
:>Naomi.
:>You illness is as bad as it is now because you father did not get you treated properly.
:>Tsuyosa will not have to endure that.
:>She pulled herself back into my chest.
:>No. No he will not.
:>The fact that she didn't protest told me she had thought of it before.
:>She just refused to admit it was possible, until now.

:>Toshiro was right, of course.
:>Emotions did not listen to reason.
:>Nothing I could ever say would stop Naomi from harboring guilt over Tsuyosa's illness.
:>Just like I would always jump a little every time one of them coughed, or would wonder the posible deeper meanings behind every yawn, every drop of sweat that would come from my son and my wife.
:>But reason could help you see those feelings for what they were, and that would give you the strength to push them aside. To refuse to act upon them.
:>I suppose I should be grateful to Naomi.
:>There was no faster way to get me to cast aside my own doubts and fears that to present me with someone who needed me to be strong for them.
:>I chuckled a bit, as I realized Naomi and I were quite similar in that respect.
:>The days passed, and under the combined care of Toshiro, Naomi and Nana One-Eye Tsuyosa's coughs became even less frequent.
:>They didn't stop altogether, but they were also never severe.
:>In fact, Tsuyosa was gaining strength faster than Naomi.
:>As days turned to weeks, I spent more and more time with my family.
:>The others did not intrude, and handled all the preparations for our journey themselves.
:>I was rocking a sleeping Tsuyosa while Naomi practiced her calligraphy.
:>One of the sticks of medicinal incense was burning.
:>The smoke didn't smell like any incense I'd smelled before, and there was an odd sharp odor just at the back of it.
:>It was an odd thing, like an afterthought, or seeing something out of the corner of your eye.
:>But with your nose.
:>Does that really help?
:>Oh yes, proper calligraphy takes very fine muscle control. When you are weak or tired it will show in the character.
:>I meant the incense.
:>Oh!
:>Yes, it really does help. It's like... like how I can seem to breath easier in cool open air, during autumn.
:>Huh.
:>Toshiro has been preparing them for us.
:>It does not take many to last a day.
:>Really, only one for Tsuyosa, and two or three for me.