Editing /tg/ History (section)

==Shit Sandwich II: All You Can Eat Buffet (1939–1945)==
'''What Happened:''' Remember how everyone thought World War 1 would be the last world war? Remember how everybody figured that they could keep kicking Germany and it wouldn't come back to bite them at all, because Germany wasn't allowed to have a military anymore? 

They were wrong. 

In the first year of this period, [[Khorne|Germany]] and the Soviet Union sign an agreement to not fight each other. It's totally just a non-aggression pact guise. Nothing in here about us taking over six other countries, nope, not at all. So in September of 1939, Germany and the Soviets spitroasted Poland (for the fourth time), jumpstarting the next great shit sandwich. Next thing you know, the Soviets are getting their asses handed to them in Finland (Whom Germany was kinda sorta helping out), the Germans are invading Denmark... and so are the British by way of Iceland, which at the time pledged to the Danish monarch. Japan and Italy decide that because they didn't get much play in the last war, it's time for them to fuck around.  [[Slaanesh|Japan]] went and sent its troops into Korea, China, and Southeast Asia to rape, massacre, and enslave everything in sight. Italy [[FAIL|became even more of a laughingstock]] but secured a pact with the Nazis. 

Things seem to calm down for a bit. The French are pretty sure they've got themselves covered, when suddenly it's "Güten täg, Frankreich!" And then there was just Great Britain, alone. Hitler figured that fighting a war on just one front just wasn't manly enough, so he went and knocked on Russia's side of Poland. "Hey, you remember when we lied to everybody about that non-aggression pact that was actually an agreement to share the Balkans? I was lying about the non-aggression part too."

Meanwhile, the United States had its head up its ass, plugging its ears and saying, "LALALALA I CAN'T HEAR YOU NOTHING IS WRONG!!". But hey, at least the Brits have Russia on their side! <s>(Wait, didn't Russia attack Poland too, which was the whole reason England went to war with Germany the first time?)</s> Yep, it's [[Axis & Allies|the evil despicable Axis versus the very good allies]]! 

Meanwhile, Germany's buddy Japan was continuing its own world domination and torture spree. Japan and the US engaged in a lot of Pacific pissing contests, and the Empire finally decided that they'd have to fight the US sooner or later, so they might as well kick them in the balls before they know what's what. Pearl Harbor goes down, but it turns out the Americans had taken their balls out for the day, and Japan missed their biggest strategic targets in the strike. Instead of crippling the American fleets with a power shot to the nuts, they just spat in their face.  The US dropped into [[barbarian|RAGEMODE]], entering the war with Japan, and with Germany too because "oh right, those guys are kinda our allies whoops."

The Russians turn shit around at Stalingrad after years of slow grinding retreat. The Brits with a little help from the US take Italy, and set up for D-Day.  War wise, it's just a long grind from there to the end of the whole deal. Germany loses and surrenders and it looks like the Japanese won't follow suit. That is, until the US hits them with the biggest ball-busting ever delivered by a pair of airplanes. Thus America showed Japan and the world; If you're going to surprise someone with a sack-tap, you better make sure it works. 

*'''Themes to Use:''' There's a reason we have so goddamn many movies and video games set in this period. There's so many great stories in so many different places. There's the single greatest villains ever available. We've got the start of modern espionage, we've got the horrors of the final solution, and the whole thing has an epic good versus Evil thing going on. It's hard to look at this time period and ''not'' find an interesting story to tell. 

*'''Notable Works Set In This Period:''' The old Breed, Saving Private Ryan, Kelly's Heroes, Inglourious Basterds, Fury, Band Of Brothers, Schindler's List...