Editing G.I. Joe (section)

===COBRA=== 
[[File:Cobra logo.png|thumb|Crashing through the Sky, comes a Fearful Cry...]]
COBRA's official head honcho is the mysterious figure known only as '''Cobra Commander''', his face perpetually covered either by a blue cloth mask probably ripped off of Marvel's Baron Zemo, or a much more iconic and cool-looking helmet with featureless polished faceplate. He is generally depicted as a brilliant (if insane) and highly charismatic figure with great ideas but also terrible tempers and a raging ego. Even in the 80s cartoon, whilst best known for shouting "retreat" when it seemed battle was going against him, a lot of his plans were genuinely quite clever! The 80s animated movie presented an alternative origin for Cobra Commander, in that he was an exile from a lost civilization of biotech-using [[Serpentfolk]] hidden in the Arctic who planned to reclaim the world they had ruled before the destruction of the dinosaurs... most people prefer to forget this iteration exists, if only for the [[HFY]]ness of his 80s comic backstory, where he was a failed used car salesman who went mad after his family were killed in a traffic accident, and subsequently reinvented himself as a world-threatening supervillain.

Contrasting the Commander, '''Destro''' is a cold, calculating arms dealer hailing from Scotland, and looking like he should be dancing to Boney M in his spare time with his plunging neckline. Supplying COBRA and all other bad actors worldwide with weapons and mercenaries, Destro's most defining trait is the metal mask he wears to look like knockoff Dr. Doom. In universe, it's a tradition in his family after his ancestor was sentenced to have a mask fitted to his face after he sold arms to both sides of a medieval conflict. You'd think that with his money he could move on, but then the Scottish traditions should not be mocked.

The '''Baroness''' rounds out the top brass of COBRA, a blue-blooded aristocrat who's as much of a gifted genius as she is absolutely corrupt to the core. Her intelligence and personal wealth are of such a scale that it's very likely that she's the power behind the organization. She's also responsible for a lot of...[[Slaanesh|awakenings]] for many young boys in the 80's, considering she's evil, some sort of Central European, and typically wears spandex or leather and glasses.

'''Doctor Mindbender''' acts as the organization's resident mad scientist, though his topless outfit would have you wonder how that even was the case. See, he started off just making a device to numb pain for orthodontic procedures, only for it to go haywire and screw with his brain just enough to [[Haemonculus|delete his sense of morality]] and not render him a vegetable. With restraints such as ethics no longer being an issue, he decided to go further into the field of mind-fuckery and genetics to such a point that Cobra Commander gave him an offer.

'''Storm Shadow''' is pretty much a palette swap of Snake Eyes, being a ninja, except wearing white - and thus defeating the point of being a stealthy ninja. At least he's not utterly married to the outfit, so that's a point in his favor. He's of the same ninja clan as Snake Eyes, being a descendant of the clan's founder, but he decided to go renegade and get hired to act as Cobra Commander's personal bodyguard.

'''Serpentor''' is COBRA's alternative to having Cobra Commander as their head honcho; a genetically engineered super-soldier created by Dr. Mindbender using DNA harvested from some of history's greatest conquerors to produce one super-clone that would genetically inherit their combined tactical skills, charisma and personal fighting abilities. It... ''technically'' worked, but there's one teeny tiny little problem: he's fucking '''nuts'''! Yes, the guy has the respect of the troops for his willingness to fight alongside them, he's a legitimate badass, and he's capable of surprisingly brilliant schemes on occasion, but he's also incredibly aggressive, overbearing, shortsighted, demanding and impulsive. We're talking a man whose first plan upon taking charge was to launch a full-scale invasion of Washington D.C. and conquer it with nothing but the men he had available to him as COBRA's leader. Even '''Cobra Commander''' pointed out that this was a stupid idea, because they didn't have anywhere near the military forces to hold out when the ''entire US army'' came to kick them out of town! Mindbender officially blames the flaw on the fact he didn't get that one last DNA sample he intended to stabilize Serpentor's personality, but considering said DNA sample was from ''Sergeant Slaughter'', the more likely culprit is that Mindbender just screwed up on a fundamental level.

'''Viper/Cobra Trooper:''' The basic grunts of COBRA, the Viper and the Cobra Trooper represent one of the many, many continuity snarls of the franchise. Though marketed with different names and uniforms, they are officially considered interchangeable by G.I.Joe's designers - different names for the same character. Fans instead prefer to view them as distinct ranks; Cobra Troopers are the green recruits, the lowest of the low, the cannon fodder, whilst Vipers have proven themselves loyal to COBRA and are now on the bottom rung of the promotions ladder, ready to begin reaching for the various specialist positions.

'''Aero-Viper:''' COBRA's pilots and air force; if it flies, these guys fly it. Specialists include the A.V.A.Cs (pilots the Firebat interceptor mini-jet), '''Air Devils''' (glider-operating commandos and aerial assault units), '''Gyro-Vipers''' (pilots the Mamba gunship), '''Heli-Vipers''' (elite battle copter pilots), '''Strato-Vipers''' (pilots the high-speed Night Raven jet) and '''Astro-Vipers''' (Strato-Vipers further trained for use in space warfare).

'''Alley Viper:''' Specialists in urban assault and urban warfare.

'''B.A.T:''' '''B'''attle '''A'''ndroid '''T'''roopers are cheaply made, readily disposable combat [[robot]]s fielded by Cobra in large units. Unfortunately, one of the things that makes them so cheap is distinctly lackluster programming and Friend/Foe Identifying systems: B.A.Ts basically just wander forward and shoot anything they register, with just barely enough processing power to reload their guns. Their mechanical nature means they can be mowed down en mass and blown to bits without loosing the PG rating.

'''Cobra Coils:''' Specialist drivers for Cobra's high-speed pursuit vehicles. Coils wear computerized speed suits with integrated voice activation tech, letting them control their vehicles with their voices.

'''Crimson Guard:''' The most elite troopers of Cobra's forces. They tend to be Cobra Commander's personal guard.

'''Cyber-Viper:''' [[Cyborg|Cybernetically augmented]] Vipers imbued with increased reflexes and thought processes. They work second to Dr. Mindbender, directing his '''Mega-Viper''' monster-trainers, and through them controlling his genetic freakshows, such as the '''Bio-Vipers''' and '''Monstro-Vipers'''.

'''Desert Scorpion:''' Pulling double duty, whilst the Desert Scorpions' official role is as Cobra's desert warfare branch, everybody knows this is also the Cobra equivalent of a disciplinary boot camp; Scorpions who fail to get through a year in the unit with a spotless record are promptly demoted even further to the rank of '''Toxo-Viper''', the one role even worse than being a Scorpion! Fear of ending up in the Desert Scorpions is one of the many sticks that Cobra high command uses to enforce some semblance of loyalty and discipline in the ranks.

'''Eels:''' Cobra's underwater operatives, specializing in marine engineering and subaquatic demolition. The best of the best are promoted to an elite sub-unit called the '''Lampreys'''. Other Eels are promoted to '''Sea Slugs''', who pilot the stealthy tactical submersibles that Cobra calls "Sea Rays". Dr. Mindbender's experiments in enhancing the human form has created three elite subdivisions; '''Hydro-Vipers''' have been surgically and chemically modified to better handle the stresses of deep diving, whilst '''Morays''' are Eels who have undergone genetic modification to improve their strength, endurance and swimming speed. Finally, '''Bio-Vipers''' have been infused with so many different genes from aquatic animals that they have been transformed into inhuman monsters that need neural control chips to be kept docile.

'''Fast Blast Viper:''' If you know your military history, you'll know that the blitzkrieg is a pretty devastating tactic, so of course Cobra wants to be able to use it themselves. Fast Blast Vipers are Cobra's ultimate blitzkrief specialists, trained to hit fast and hit ''hard''. Basically, take a [[ninja]], give them a rocket launcher, then install a chip in their brains that eliminates fear responses and heightens aggression. So not that much like a ninja, really...

'''Flak-Viper:''' Infantry troops armed with anti-aircraft weaponry.

'''Frag-Viper:''' Cobra's grenadiers, outfitted with a helmet that sports an electronic range-finder, which is handy, and a special hurling implement based on the cesta, which is... well, why not just use a normal grenade launcher?

'''H.E.A.T Viper:''' Anti-tank troopers armed with advanced rocket launchers that feature heat suppression technology, which improves the trooper's stealth capabilities and ambushing skills, and a sophisticated targeting system built into their helmets.

'''H.I.S.S Driver:''' Despite the name, these guys, also known as ''Tank-Vipers'', are Cobra's armored infantry division, piloting Cobra's arsenal of armored vehicles and even the F.A.N.G helicopters.

'''Incinerator:''' Flame weapons are cool, but they're not exactly practical. Incinerators are Cobra's attempt to make burning shit on the battlefield more viable, equipping specialist troopers with both highly advanced flamethrowers and flame-survival gear that borders on being a suit of [[Power Armor]]; it's air-conditioned, non-flammable, has a built-in air supply, and is bulletproofed for good measure. Luckily for the Joes, these suits ain't cheap. Their less prestigious counterparts are known as '''Shock-Vipers'''.

'''Jungle Viper:''' Guerilla operatives trained for jungle warfare.

'''Laser-Viper:''' As the name suggests, these are Cobra's specialists in experimental laser weaponry.

'''Motor-Viper:''' All of Cobra's generalist vehicle operatives as well as their reconnaissance and patrol troopers are lumped together under the simple term "Motor-Viper". More glamorous sub-divisions get associated with more specialized vehicles, including the '''Tank-Vipers''' (who pilot the H.I.S.S), '''Ice-Vipers''' (who pilot the W.O.L.F), '''Track-Vipers''' (who pilot the H.I.S.S II), and '''Nitro-Vipers''' (who pilot Detonators).

'''Night Vulture:''' Gliders have their place in the army for aerial reconnaissance and covert ops, and so even Cobra finds a use for glider pilots, who form the Night Vultures squad. Like many other Cobra squads, the training is hellish; prospective recruits are taken to a spot five miles out from Cobra Island, put into their glider, then shoved out. If they don't fall into the shark-infested waters, they're in.

'''Night-Viper:''' Armed with the most advanced sensory augmentation tech that Cobra can cook up, the Night-Vipers are its ultimate night fighting team.

'''Neo-Viper:''' Every looking for an advantage, Cobra has naturally turned to bio-enhancement and genetic engineering. Whilst Mindbender's experiments have produced many horrible monsters, his successes include the Neo-Vipers; genetically modified with superior body temperature control and heightened reflexes that allow them to operate in even the nastiest climates.

'''Pit-Viper:''' Cobra's specialists in strealth, evasion and infiltration. Wait, don't the Night-Vipers already fill that role? Is night fighting really that different to being an infiltration trooper?

'''Range-Viper:''' Cobra's wilderness combat & survival branch. These are the hardcore wilderness enthusiasts of Cobra's ranks, a necessity, as their job entails being dropped out in the wilderness and fending for themselves by hunting, raiding, and stealing. '''Monstro-Vipers''' are Dr. Mindbender's attempt to "improve" on Range-Vipers by infusing them with DNA from grizzly bears, [[werewolf|werewolves]] and [[sasquatch]]es, creating hulking mammalian beasts that are only kept obedient by computer controllers implanted in their brains.

'''Rock-Viper:''' The mountain infantry division of Cobra.

'''S.A.W-Viper:''' Heavy weapons troopers, typically sporting a modified mini-chain gun, from which they take their name.

'''Secto-Viper:''' Pilots of the Cobra BUGG amphibious vehicle, Secto-Vipers are specialists in amphibious operations and marine surveillance, making them Cobra Island's first line of defense as they patrol its shoreline. 

'''Snow Serpent:''' When Cobra says they want to conquer the world, they mean they want to conquer the ''world''. Not even the frozen wastes of the Arctic, Antarctic or Siberia are beyond their vision. Hence, Snow Serpents; former Eels trained in arctic combat conditions to serve as Cobra's cold weather environment specialists. Specialist pilots for the W.O.L.F snow tank are known as '''Ice-Vipers'''.

'''Techno-Viper:''' Cobra's battlefield technicians. These are the guys who control the B.A.Ts and fix up Cobra's various vehicles, when they're not performing other feats of battlefield engineering.

'''Tele-Viper:''' The communication officers of Cobra's forces, ensuring the Vipers get their marching orders. They have super-advanced transmission receiving - and jamming - equipment, but other Vipers regard them as a joke. Especially since their LED displays are visible on their visors; that cracks up the rest of Cobra's forces.

'''Toxo-Viper:''' Officially dubbed the "Hazardous Environment ", everyone in Cobra knows what they ''really'' are - the penal battalion. The Toxo-Vipers are where you end up if you ''seriously'' screw up, or if even the Desert Scorpions can't straighten you out, working around toxic chemicals and noxious compounds with cheaply made "protective" armor that has earned them the nickname "The Leaky Bucket Brigade". Subunits include the '''Sludge-Vipers''' (armed with chemical weaponry), '''Heavy Water Vipers''' (deal with ''radioactive'' material & weaponry) and '''Toxo-Zombies''' (Toxo-Vipers transformed into hideous [[mutant]]s and/or mindless [[zombie]]s by exposure to Mindbender-knows-what).

'''V-Troops: ''' A program by Dr. Mindbender to engineer supersoldiers for Cobra by infusing animal DNA into humans, building on the bio-enhancement programs he had used to create Bio-Vipers and Monstro-Vipers. '''Coil Crushers''' are Jungle Vipers spliced with snake DNA, giving them venomous spittle and superhuman gripping strength. '''Electric E.E.Ls''' are Morays further spliced with genes from their namesake animal, so they can produce deadly electric shocks, jam sonar and radar, and even bio-luminesce. '''Razor Troopers''' are former Alley Vipers whose tiger gene-splicing is bolostered with nervous system tweaks, heightened pain tolerance, and retractile blades. '''Sand Scorpions''' are Desert Scorpions infused with scorpion DNA and further boosed with biomechanical implants. '''Snow Wolves''' are Snow Serpents inused with DNA from arctic wolves. '''Swamp Rats''' are infiltrators given innate stealth and survival abilities through infusion of swamp rat DNA, including superior disease resistance and the ability to squeeze through unnaturally small spaces.

'''W.O.R.M.S:''' Taking their unfortunate moniker from the acronym for "Weapons Ordnance Rugged Machine Specialist", these guys are Cobra's artillery specialists, and usually found manning the Maggot.

In the toylines, COBRA traditionally gets the weirder, more science fictiony vehicles, such as the Pogo; a one-man vehicle that mounts a dual-linked [[lascannon]] and uses a combination of a rocket booster and four spring-loaded legs to bounce around over even the rockiest terrain.

====Vehicles and Bases====
'''H.I.S.S Tank:''' The most iconic of Cobra's armed vehicles are the H.I.S.S Tanks; there have been at least ''five'' distinct models (H.I.S.S I-V), with most of those also having multiple specialized sub-models.

'''Rattler:''' Cobra's most iconic flying machine, the Rattler is the basis of Cobra's air forces. Its prototype was the '''Diamondback''', which seems to have been derived from the French-built Mirage jet fighter.

'''Night Raven:''' More advanced than the Rattler, the Night Raven is a supersonic jet fighter that makes up the elite of Cobra's air forces.

'''Piranha:''' A Cobra fast attack boat, armed with machine guns, depth charges, missiles and torpedoes.

'''S.N.A.K.E:''' Depending on the continuity, these lumbering humanoid tanks with their two modular weapon arms have been portrayed as both [[Power Armor]] and combat [[robot]]s similar to (but tankier than) the B.A.Ts.

'''Adder:''' Basically a mobile missile launcher.

'''Liquidator:''' An advanced tactical jet fighter aircraft.

'''Maggot:''' A self-propelled artillery piece consisting of two interconnecting components; a forward attack vehicle and a combination mobile command center/long-ranged artillery tank that is towed behind it. Maggots are piloted by specially trained 4-man teams of Cobra technicians known as W.O.R.Ms.

'''Mamba:''' Cobra's primary helicopter gunship.

'''Mantis:''' One-man submarines equipped with subaquatic missile launchers and gripper arms, typically piloted by Morays.

'''Moray:''' Not to be confused with the elite underwater operatives of the same name! The Moray hydrofoil is a heavily armed high-speed interceptor craft, a torpedo/missile boat intended for for amphibious operations, littoral combat, and high-speed pursuit. Very useful, but you gotta wonder if Cobra agents ever get the names mixed up.

'''Battle Barge:''' Despite the fancy name, these are basically floating bunkers deployed to protect the waters around Cobra Island. Three-man teams spend long hours bobbing in the waves in all conditions, manning the radar and waiting to blast any intruders with the laser cannons. Not exactly a job that most Cobra troopers are jumping to do.

'''Bugg:''' An amphibious fire-support vehicle, the Bugg may look stupid with its twin bubble-dome cockpits, but it carries a ridiculous amount of firepower.

'''Buzz Boar:''' Up there with the kookier Cobra vehicles, the Buzz Boar is basically a subterranean assault machine, resembling a giant mechanical tire with a buzzsaw-like array of tunnelling teeth arranged around its rim. When powered on, the spinning of this "buzzsaw drill" lets it either propel itself along the ground, or chew through the earth below it, and a skilled pilot can burrow into and out of the earth as they drive along. It also carries two .50 caliber repeating machine guns and two short-range missiles, but let's face it, having one of these run you over is gonna be a real bad day.

'''C.A.T:''' The '''C'''rimson '''A'''ttack '''T'''ank is the personal armored vehicle of Destro's private military, the Crimson Guard.

'''C.L.A.W:''' Formally called the '''C'''overt '''L'''ight '''A'''erial '''W'''eapon, the C.L.A.W is basically a mechanized jet-powered hang-glider. Strapped to the user's back, this rocket-propelled wing is also equipped with machine guns, bombs and missile launchers.

'''Night Adder:''' A sleek, futuristic-looking jet aircraft.

'''Night Landing:''' Despite the fancy name, it's just a standard infiltration boat; auto-inflated bulletproof nylon/polyskin, an outboard motor, and an air-cooled .45 caliber machine gun.

'''Paralyzer:''' A fast-attack tank.

'''Parasite:''' A heavily armed APC capable of carrying up to 17 soldiers, though 11 of those will have to ride the exterior running boards. Carries a rotating quad-laser chaingun, two front-mounted dual revolving machine guns, a rear-mounted multi-barreled revolving machine gun, and a mega-blast bomb-firing catapult mounted on the roof.

'''Pogo:''' Not even pretending to be a realistic armored vehicle, the "Ballistic Battle Ball" is basically an armored cockpit strapped to powerful rocket booster and a very strong suspension that doubles as a giant jumping spring, created for ground-targeting offensives in difficult terrain. It jet-bounces along, launching homing bombs and blasting things with an underslung twin-barreled armor-piercing machine gun. As if you needed more proof the designer of this was off his meds, these weapons are officially subtitled the HOBO ('''Ho'''ming '''Bo'''mb Systems) and the BONK '''B'''alanced '''O'''perational-'''N'''egation '''K'''inetic Weapon).

'''Detonator:''' Using the same basic chassis as the Adder, the Detonator has been outfitted with new weapons for a role as a long-range anti-aircraft assault vehicle, making them integral to Cobra's air defense teams.

'''Rat:''' A high-speed attack hovercraft created for use in swampy environments. It wards off enemy aircraft with two flak rotor launchers, and any infantry that survive being blasted by the twin double-barreled rotating machine guns then risks being chopped to pieces by the two front-mounted gyrating barbed slicer blades; normally used to cut through dense waterweed and bank grass, they also make a mess out of any grunt dumb enough to stand in the Rat's way!

'''Riptide:''' An enormous and heavily armed deep sea attack submarine that also doubles as a mobile underwater base.

'''Earthquake:''' As if to prove that the [[Transformer]]s weren't the only ones who could weaponize construction vehicles, Cobra made this thing, basically taking a bulldozer, super-charging the engine and strapping multiple missile launchers, laser cannons, mortars and a machine gun to it.

'''S.M.S:''' Seemingly derived from the H.I.S.S Mk I, the Sentry and Missile System consists of a tank that also tows along a missile launcher, letting it fill the role of fire support.

'''F.A.N.G:''' The Fully Armed Negator Gyrocopter is a is a small lightly armed and armored one-man helicopter best used for covert and fast-attack operations. It was eventually replaced by the turbo-prop air vehicle known as the F.A.N.G II.

'''Scorpion:''' Officially classed as a Desert Attack Vehicle, the Scorpion is basically a jeep with a rotating missile launcher and a gatling gun strapped to it.

'''S.E.A. Legs:''' Standing for Surprise, Engage and Attack Legs, these are basically Cobra [[Sentinel]]s.

'''Sea Ray:''' Cobra's Airborne Submersible Delivery System., though it's also described as a glider with a purpose of submersible transport.

'''Septic Tank:''' An "Anti-Environment Assault Tank", the Septic Tank is a repurposed H.I.S.S assigned to units of Toxo-Vipers and Sludge-Vipers that launches chemical weaponry.

'''Ferret:''' Cobra's ATV of choice, this is basically a quad-bike with rocket-launchers, .50 calibre machine guns and a grenade launcher strapped on. Typically used by the light infantry and security details.

'''Firebat:''' Cobra's interceptor of choice, this "light assault jet" is bascially little more than a seat, a minigun, and assorted mines/bombs strapped to a rocket engine.

'''Stellar Stiletto:''' Cobra's own personal space fighter, essentially what happens when a jet fighter shags a spaceship.

'''Flight Pod:''' Basically a seat with jet thrusters, a machine gun and long-ranged missiles strapped to it and a (hopefully) bulletproof glass dome over the top of it, this airborne 1-man assault craft has earned the nickname "Trubble Bubble" from G.I.Joe troopers.

'''Sting Raider:''' A missile-armed hybrid of submarine and VTOL jet.

'''Stinger:''' A 4-WD jeep with a back-mounted rocket launcher, favored for use in nocturnal assaults.

'''Stun:''' A high-speed ground vehicle that resembles a motorcycle that wants to be a tank, created to serve as a patrol and pursuit vehicle for Cobra.

'''Hammerhead:''' A "Submersible Sea Tank", this heavily armed amphibious vehicle can cruise along underwater, then run up on land to attack with its various weaponry. It also carries multiple small one-man detachable sea sled scout crafts and attack submarines.

'''Hurrican:''' A VTOL fighter jet created to replace the Rattler and the Night Raven as Cobra's air fighter of choice.

'''Hydro-Sled:''' A jet-propelled, low-slung two-man attack vessel intended for marine skirmishes.