Editing Board-tans/biz

{{Template:Board-tan Index}}

'''Gender/Physical Description''': Male, late 20s. Full details of /biz/-tan's appearance are often disputed. He's usually a male and always in a suit or at least wearing a tie; in some versions he looks like a normal guy with glasses, other versions he's a 1980s businessman dad.

/biz/-tan's appearance is also totally dependent on his mental state at the time. [See below]


'''Personality/Habits/Hobbies/Behavior''': /biz/-tan is known for two things. One is his obsession with Cryptocurrencies and the other is his particular brand of Bi-polar disorder. This disease manifests itself in wild mood swings, often pegged to the market. When the market is up, /biz/-tan becomes manic. "No Coiners btfo!" and "We're all gonna made it lads!" echo throughout the halls. Fancy suits, lavish food and ostentatious accomodations adorn every corner of /biz/tan's room.  /biz/-tan will run up to other boards, throwing wads of cash around and bragging about his SICK GAINZ unmatched in any other area of finance. Most boards find this behavior to be a bit annoying, to say the least. This behavior will last anywhere from a day to weeks at a time, until the market takes a downswing.


In this event, /biz/-tan's demeanor (And appearance) will change entirely. He will take on a sickly pink color. His tailored Armani suits suddenly replaced with wifebeaters. There will also be screaming, a lot of screaming. "AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH" and "MOMMY OH GOD HELP ME AHHHH" is heard down the hall from /biz/-tan's room. Depression overcomes him. In /biz/-tan's mind, his chance to avoid wageslavery was dashed to the winds. Most boards avoid him at this time. Other boards sometimes take advantage of his mental state to assert the end of all cryptogainz. When the market goes up (As it always fucking does) /biz/-tan turns manic yet again. Money and good times are had by all as /biz/ sings praises to his latest 200% ROI shitcoin.

There is one useful effect from all this. One can accurately judge when to buy by how pink /biz/-tan appears at any given time. 

Lately, /biz/-tan has become worried about whether or not he can "cash out" of crypto. This should be interpreted as a symptom of his deteriorating mind. As /biz/-tan has cashed out of crypto many times in the past.

Recently, they began trading in NFTs as well, showing off the latest Bored Ape they just bought only to get thrown out by /ic/-tan.

'''Relationships''':/biz/-tan wants to be friends with /pol/, but he cannot understand why /pol/ does not appreciate crytpocurrencies. After all, they're the only way to escape the world wide jewish conspiracy. 

/biz/ is a NEET and often laments his inability to find a partner. /r9k/ can sympathize with these "feels"
[[Category:Board-tans]]