Guidelines of the Space Marines - Revision history

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2023-06-21T14:40:37Z

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2601:585:8301:76D0:29A7:8950:815D:E28F: /* Guidelines of the Space Marines */

2021-03-06T02:21:14Z

Guidelines of the Space Marines

76.204.59.13: /* Guidelines of the Space Marines */

2020-10-11T11:49:11Z

Guidelines of the Space Marines

← Older revision		Revision as of 11:49, 11 October 2020
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	533: Thou shalt not inquire a Dark Angel about what happened to Caliban.		533: Thou shalt not inquire a Dark Angel about what happened to Caliban.

	534: Thou shalt not inquire a ~~Rave~~ Guard marine about the raptor project.		534: Thou shalt not inquire a Raven Guard marine about the raptor project.

	=== If thou is having a hard time remembering all the guidelines... ===		=== If thou is having a hard time remembering all the guidelines... ===

76.204.59.13: /* Guidelines of the Space Marines */

2020-10-11T11:48:31Z

Guidelines of the Space Marines

← Older revision		Revision as of 11:48, 11 October 2020
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	522: If thou are promised confections from a strange looking purple and black Chaos Space Marine in a Land Raider, get an adult. You already have a confection ration, it is not even needed in the first place.		522: If thou are promised confections from a strange looking purple and black Chaos Space Marine in a Land Raider, get an adult. You already have a confection ration, it is not even needed in the first place.

	523: Thou shalt not use a conversion beamer to "ray away the gay”. It doesn’t work. We tried it on the Harlequins...it just makes a mess.		523: Thou shalt not use a conversion beamer to "ray away the gay”. It doesn’t work. We tried it on the Harlequins...it just makes a mess.

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	530: Likewise, humming the “Baby Shark” theme around the scout company of the Carcharadons is now illegal under the Lex Imperialis, (Seriously, if I have to hear that song one more time!)		530: Likewise, humming the “Baby Shark” theme around the scout company of the Carcharadons is now illegal under the Lex Imperialis, (Seriously, if I have to hear that song one more time!)

	531: Thou shalt not "flip the bird" near Marines Malevolent, lest thou wishes to experience pain, unless the Salamanders are present in which case flip away		531: Thou shalt not "flip the bird" near Marines Malevolent, lest thou wishes to experience pain, unless the Salamanders are present in which case flip away.

	532: Thou shalt not tease Enginseers with toasters.		532: Thou shalt not tease Enginseers with toasters.

			533: Thou shalt not inquire a Dark Angel about what happened to Caliban.

			534: Thou shalt not inquire a Rave Guard marine about the raptor project.

	=== If thou is having a hard time remembering all the guidelines... ===		=== If thou is having a hard time remembering all the guidelines... ===

1d4chan>Death Korps of Krieg Soldier: /* Additional Guidelines to hold due to recent events. */

2020-07-05T20:48:53Z

Additional Guidelines to hold due to recent events.

← Older revision		Revision as of 20:48, 5 July 2020
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	520: Thou shall not remind [[Marneus Calgar]] that the Lord Commander pefers Cato Sicarius and [[Dante\|Lord Dante]].		520: Thou shall not remind [[Marneus Calgar]] that the Lord Commander pefers Cato Sicarius and [[Dante\|Lord Dante]].

	520: Thou shalt not refer to the custodians as "~~banannas~~ in ~~pyjamas"~~ nor shalt thou refer to the ~~empererors~~ personal companions as "~~bannana~~ strippers" or "cone heads" ~~thou~~ can however refer to the ~~aeldari~~ as such		520: Thou shalt not refer to the custodians as "bananas in pajamas” nor shalt thou refer to the Emperor’s personal companions as "banana strippers" or "cone heads". Thou can, however, refer to the Aeldari as such.

	521: Thou shalt not use thy Mechanicus-issued chainsword as a toothbrush...unless you are Sly Marbo in which case you may do whatever you please.		521: Thou shalt not use thy Mechanicus-issued chainsword as a toothbrush...unless you are Sly Marbo in which case you may do whatever you please.

1d4chan>Death Korps of Krieg Soldier: /* Additional Guidelines to hold due to recent events. */

2020-07-05T19:26:20Z

Additional Guidelines to hold due to recent events.

← Older revision		Revision as of 19:26, 5 July 2020
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	520: Thou shalt not refer to the custodians as "banannas in pyjamas" nor shalt thou refer to the empererors personal companions as "bannana strippers" or "cone heads" thou can however refer to the aeldari as such		520: Thou shalt not refer to the custodians as "banannas in pyjamas" nor shalt thou refer to the empererors personal companions as "bannana strippers" or "cone heads" thou can however refer to the aeldari as such

	521: ~~thou~~ shalt not use ~~their mechanicus~~ issued chainsword as a ~~toothrbush~~...unless ~~your~~ Sly Marbo in which case ~~go ahead sir!~~		521: Thou shalt not use thy Mechanicus-issued chainsword as a toothbrush...unless you are Sly Marbo in which case you may do whatever you please.

	~~522: if thou are promised confections from a strange looking purple and black chaos marine in a land raider get an adult, in fact get an inquisitor and a battlegroup!~~

			522: If thou are promised confections from a strange looking purple and black Chaos Space Marine in a Land Raider, get an adult. You already have a confection ration, it is not even needed in the first place.
	523: Thou shalt not use a conversion beamer to "ray away the gay”. It doesn’t work. We tried it on the Harlequins...it just makes a mess.		523: Thou shalt not use a conversion beamer to "ray away the gay”. It doesn’t work. We tried it on the Harlequins...it just makes a mess.

1d4chan>Death Korps of Krieg Soldier: /* Additional Guidelines to hold due to recent events. */

2020-07-05T19:22:56Z

Additional Guidelines to hold due to recent events.

← Older revision		Revision as of 19:22, 5 July 2020
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	522: if thou are promised confections from a strange looking purple and black chaos marine in a land raider get an adult, in fact get an inquisitor and a battlegroup!		522: if thou are promised confections from a strange looking purple and black chaos marine in a land raider get an adult, in fact get an inquisitor and a battlegroup!

	523: ~~thou~~ shalt not use a conversion beamer to "ray away the ~~gay!" it doesnt~~ work~~! we~~ tried it on the ~~harliquens~~...it just makes a mess		523: Thou shalt not use a conversion beamer to "ray away the gay”. It doesn’t work. We tried it on the Harlequins...it just makes a mess.

	524: ~~thou~~ shalt not punt ~~ratlings~~ and ~~squats~~....unless you have an ~~imperial~~ sanctioned scorepost and fill out ~~squat punting~~ form 817c first		524: Thou shalt not punt Ratlings and Squats....unless you have an Imperial-sanctioned scorepost and fill out Squat Punting form 817c first.

	525: ~~thou~~ shalt not go play "~~Hide~~ and go seek" with the ~~raven gaurd~~...unless thou wishes to be on the next deployment fighting ~~craftworld alaitoc!~~		525: Thou shalt not play "hide and go seek" with the Raven Guard...unless thou wishes to be on the next deployment fighting Eldar Craftworld Alaitoc.

	526: Thou shalt not replace the Commissar’s sanctioned bolt pistol with a Mechanicus-issued BB gun replica. Those men were meant to be executed.		526: Thou shalt not replace the Commissar’s sanctioned bolt pistol with a Mechanicus-issued BB gun replica. Those men were meant to be executed.

1d4chan>Death Korps of Krieg Soldier: /* Additional Guidelines to hold due to recent events. */ needs cleanup

2020-07-05T19:19:04Z

Additional Guidelines to hold due to recent events.: needs cleanup

← Older revision		Revision as of 19:19, 5 July 2020
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	** Other pieces of equipment exclusive to thine Primaris brethen are also forbidden. If thou wish to have them, undergo the conversion into a Primaris.		** Other pieces of equipment exclusive to thine Primaris brethen are also forbidden. If thou wish to have them, undergo the conversion into a Primaris.

	500: All guidelines related to usage and bad practices relating to Rhinos, Land ~~Riders~~ and Land Speeders hold true to Repulsors. ALL OF THEM.		500: All guidelines related to usage and bad practices relating to Rhinos, Land Raiders and Land Speeders hold true to Repulsors. ALL OF THEM.

	501: Thou shall not use the Heavy Plasma Incinerator's generator extension to charge the battery of other non-commisioned devices, such as datasleets, smartphones or recreational handheld devices.		501: Thou shall not use the Heavy Plasma Incinerator's generator extension to charge the battery of other non-commisioned devices, such as datasleets, smartphones or recreational handheld devices.
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	525: thou shalt not go play "Hide and go seek" with the raven gaurd...unless thou wishes to be on the next deployment fighting craftworld alaitoc!		525: thou shalt not go play "Hide and go seek" with the raven gaurd...unless thou wishes to be on the next deployment fighting craftworld alaitoc!

	526: ~~thou~~ shalt not replace the ~~commisars~~ sanctioned ~~Bolt~~ pistol with a ~~mechanicus~~ issued bb gun replica~~, its not funny, those~~ men were meant to be executed		526: Thou shalt not replace the Commissar’s sanctioned bolt pistol with a Mechanicus-issued BB gun replica. Those men were meant to be executed.

	527: ~~when~~ a ~~dreadnaught~~ or ~~sentinel~~ engages a ~~tyranid hive tyrant~~, ~~norm queen~~ or "~~super heavy creature"~~ thou shalt not yell out "~~get~~ away from her you BITCH!"		527: When a dreadnought or Sentinel engages a Tyranid Hive Tyrant, Norn Queen or any other “Super Heavy Creature", thou shalt not yell out "Get away from her you BITCH!"

	528: ~~thou~~ shalt not throw dog biscuits at the ~~space wolves, wolfen~~ are ~~ok however~~		528: Thou shalt not throw dog biscuits at the Space Wolves (Wulfen are fair game though).

	529: ~~thou~~ shalt not hum the ~~jaws~~ theme around the Carcharadons, that is their sacred battle hymn and we got a very nasty letter from their ~~chaplians~~ last month asking us to stop~~, its~~ not funny~~(actually it is)!~~		529: Thou shalt not hum the “Jaws” theme around the Carcharadons, that is their sacred battle hymn and we got a very nasty letter from their chaplains last month asking us to stop. It is not funny.

	530: ~~likewise~~, humming the ~~baby shark~~ theme around the scout company of the ~~carcharadons~~ is now illegal under the ~~lex imperialis~~, ~~seriously~~ if i have to hear that song one more time!		530: Likewise, humming the “Baby Shark” theme around the scout company of the Carcharadons is now illegal under the Lex Imperialis, (Seriously, if I have to hear that song one more time!)

	531: ~~thou~~ shalt not "flip the bird" near ~~marines malevolent~~, lest thou wishes to experience pain, unless ~~either or~~ the Salamanders are present in which case flip away		531: Thou shalt not "flip the bird" near Marines Malevolent, lest thou wishes to experience pain, unless the Salamanders are present in which case flip away

	532: Thou shalt not tease Enginseers with toasters.		532: Thou shalt not tease Enginseers with toasters.

1d4chan>Death Korps of Krieg Soldier at 18:52, 5 July 2020

2020-07-05T18:52:46Z

← Older revision		Revision as of 18:52, 5 July 2020
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	357. Thou shalt not refer to thy [[Salamanders\|Salamander]] brethren as; 'niggers', 'blackies', 'slaves', 'monkeys', 'niggershits', 'homeboyz' nor 'shitskins'.		357. Thou shalt not refer to thy [[Salamanders\|Salamander]] brethren as; 'niggers', 'blackies', 'slaves', 'monkeys', 'niggershits', 'homeboyz' nor 'shitskins'.

	358. ~~Provided thou art a Salamander thyself, thou may disregard~~ rule 357 ~~at thy discretion~~.		358. Breaking rule 357 is punishable by death.

	359. Thou shall not refer to the Emperor as 'My Undead Homeboy'		359. Thou shall not refer to the Emperor as 'My Undead Homeboy'

← Older revision		Revision as of 02:21, 6 March 2021
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	10. Thou need not check to see if thy bolt pistol is loaded by looking down the barrel!		10. Thou need not check to see if thy bolt pistol is loaded by looking down the barrel!

	11. Thou shalt not go on panty raids into Sister of Battle monasteries.		11. Thou shalt not go on panty raids into Sister of Battle monasteries, lest thou wishes to be the first human to cross the galaxy without the aid of a spacecraft.

	12. Thou shalt not use thy scope for anything outside of battle. Anyone caught using them to spy out life mates shalt lose privileges.		12. Thou shalt not use thy scope for anything outside of battle. Anyone caught using them to spy out life mates shalt lose privileges.
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	17. Thou shalt not attempt to imitate heathen noise marines with "heavy metal" or "death metal" through thy com-speakers.(''Only permitted if aforesaid music venerates the God-Emperor'')		17. Thou shalt not attempt to imitate heathen noise marines with "heavy metal" or "death metal" through thy com-speakers.(''Only permitted if aforesaid music venerates the God-Emperor'')

	18. Although tempting, do not attempt to give a Tau a "high-five”.		18. Although tempting, do not attempt to give a Tau a "high-five”, they will respond violently.

	19. Thou shalt not laugh at how small IG men are.		19. Thou shalt not laugh at how small IG men are.
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	21. Thou shalt not tap the glass on the Dreadnought.		21. Thou shalt not tap the glass on the Dreadnought.

	22. Thou shalt not feed the Orks.		22. Thou shalt not feed the Orks, they will attempt to eat you instead.

	23. Thou shalt not transmit images of unclothed Sisters through the Astropaths.		23. Thou shalt not transmit images of unclothed Sisters through the Astropaths.
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	29. Thou shalt not use thy bolter to kill bees.		29. Thou shalt not use thy bolter to kill bees.

	30. Thou shalt not sniff warp fumes.		30. Thou shalt not sniff warp fumes, anyone caught doing so will be given the emperor's mercy.

	31. Thou shalt eat thy rations, and only thy rations unless other nourishment sources are the only options avaliable, and only on thy commanding officer's permission.		31. Thou shalt eat thy rations, and only thy rations unless other nourishment sources are the only options avaliable, and only on thy commanding officer's permission.
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	37. Thou shalt not use bug bombs against the 'nids. It doesn't work anymore.		37. Thou shalt not use bug bombs against the 'nids. It doesn't work anymore.

	38. Thou shalt not play Internet games with Tzeentch.		38. Thou shalt not play Internet games with Tzeentch (does not apply to the [[Blood Ravens]]).

	39. Thou shalt not e-mail the Emperor.		39. Thou shalt not e-mail the Emperor.
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	42. This is not the answer.		42. This is not the answer.

	43. Thou shalt not spray paint armour to make it look cool. Only the chapter livery is allowed. ([[Raven Guard]] are allowed of camouflage.)		43. Thou shalt not spray paint armour to make it look cool. Only the chapter livery is allowed in order to distinguish friend from foe. ([[Raven Guard]], and their successor chapters are allowed camouflage.)

	44. Thou shalt not have water gun fights with lasguns. (The Guard needs them.)		44. Thou shalt not have water gun fights with lasguns. (The Guard needs them.)
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	45. Thou shalt not juggle power weapons.		45. Thou shalt not juggle power weapons.

	46. Thou shalt not hide video links in the Sisters of Battle's monastery. <s>(What if we share them with The Emprah? Dude needs something to watch.)</s> The Emperor is above such things.		46. Thou shalt not hide video links in the Sisters of Battle's monastery. <s>(What if we share them with The Emprah? Dude needs something to watch.)</s> The Emperor is above such things.<s>[[If The Emperor Had a Text-To-Speech Device\|no he isn't]]</s>

	47. Grenades are not water balloons.		47. Grenades are not water balloons.
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	55. Barney is not a Tyranid.		55. Barney is not a Tyranid.

	56. Digimon are not in the ~~40K universe. Really~~.		56. Digimon are not affiliated with the Necrons.

	57. ~~Digimon~~ are not ~~affiliated with the Necrons.~~		57. Pokemon are not Digimon!

	58. Pokemon are not ~~Digimon!~~		58. Pokemon are not fun to play with.

	59. ~~Pokemon~~ are not ~~fun to play with~~.		59. C'tan shards are not Pokemon.

	60. Thou shalt not steal candy from babies/orks/gretchin/Commissars. Serfs shall provide them.		60. Thou shalt not steal candy from babies/orks/gretchin/Commissars. Serfs shall provide them.
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	63. Don’t play “Hangman” with the Inquisitor or Berserker.		63. Don’t play “Hangman” with the Inquisitor or Berserker.

	64. Thou shalt ignore strange voices in your head.		64. Thou shalt ignore strange voices in your head, if you do not you will be given the emperor's forgiveness.

	65. Thou shalt not put a cork in the Inquisitor's pistol.		65. Thou shalt not put a cork in the Inquisitor's pistol.
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	104. Thou shalt not put "Ecstasy" in the punch when Battle Sisters arrive for a formal meeting with the Chapter's Authorities. Refer to guideline number 97 as to why.		104. Thou shalt not put "Ecstasy" in the punch when Battle Sisters arrive for a formal meeting with the Chapter's Authorities. Refer to guideline number 97 as to why.

	105. Thou shalt not practice vampiric tendencies despite your urge to do so. [[Blood Angels]] are exempt.		105. Thou shalt not practice vampiric tendencies despite your urge to do so. ([[Blood Angels]] and successor chapters are exempt.)

	106. Thou shalt not howl when the Chapter Master bends over. [[Space Wolves]] are NOT exempt. (Full Moon Out Tonight!)		106. Thou shalt not howl when the Chapter Master bends over. [[Space Wolves]] are NOT exempt, and shall be given the emperor's mercy if seen doing so.
			(Full Moon Out Tonight!)

	107. Thou shalt not dare others to eat that squiggly thing.		107. Thou shalt not dare others to eat that squiggly thing.
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	113. The lab research Tyranids are not for emergency rations.		113. The lab research Tyranids are not for emergency rations.

	114. Thou shalt not take the Emperor Titan for a spin. [[Captain Titus]] is an exception.		114. Thou shalt not take the Emperor Titan for a spin. (watch [[Captain Titus]] is trained in operating them and is therefore an exception.)

	115. Thou shalt not use a flamer to cook a whole cow and leave none for the others. Thou shall share with thine squadmates at least.		115. Thou shalt not use a flamer to cook a whole cow and leave none for the others. Thou shall share with thine squadmates at least.
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	139. Thou shalt not jump out in front of the Rhino to get into the fight whilst still in motion...wait for orders to disembark!		139. Thou shalt not jump out in front of the Rhino to get into the fight whilst still in motion...wait for orders to disembark!

	140. Thou shalt look both ways before crossing the street. ~~Propiety~~ damage to civilian transports are still a diplomatic issue.		140. Thou shalt look both ways before crossing the street. Property damage to civilian transports are still a diplomatic issue.

	141. Thou shalt not try to "steal" assaults away from battle-brothers....they are allowed some fun too!		141. Thou shalt not try to "steal" assaults away from battle-brothers....they are allowed some fun too!
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	168. Thou shalt not swap your battle-brothers gun with a waterpistol.		168. Thou shalt not swap your battle-brothers gun with a waterpistol.

	169. Thou shalt not participate in any intoxication (i.e. alcohol) contests with Imperial Guards. (It's a sin to cheat the common man! And that ~~also~~ goes for sisters of battle!)		169. Thou shalt not participate in any intoxication (i.e. alcohol) contests with Imperial Guards. (It's a sin to cheat the common man! And that goes double for sisters of battle! see guideline 97)

	170. Thou shalt not ask a Sister if her armour isn't too small.		170. Thou shalt not ask a Sister if her armour isn't too small.
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	181. Thou shalt not use Servitors to catch your paper.		181. Thou shalt not use Servitors to catch your paper.

	182. Thou shalt not play "fetch" with Tyranids using grenades.		182. Thou shalt not play "fetch" with Tyranids using grenades...they no longer fall for it.

	183. Thou shalt not yell “catfight!” when Sisters argue.		183. Thou shalt not yell “catfight!” when Sisters argue.