Marines Malevolent - Revision history

37.228.206.198: /* Daily Rituals */ broke up marines malevolent entries into 2 or 3 entries, about how they disregard their orders, steal salamander gear and burn down imperial hive cities to kill a few orks and its stressed guiliman out to the point that he has a stomach ulcer, trolling the primarch so hard, now more marines malevolent wish to join the fight on armageddon

2026-06-20T19:08:41Z

Daily Rituals: broke up marines malevolent entries into 2 or 3 entries, about how they disregard their orders, steal salamander gear and burn down imperial hive cities to kill a few orks and its stressed guiliman out to the point that he has a stomach ulcer, trolling the primarch so hard, now more marines malevolent wish to join the fight on armageddon

← Older revision		Revision as of 19:08, 20 June 2026
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	08:30: Morning Battle Practice. Said servitors are destroyed with extreme prejudice with their families being sent messages about how worthless they were in life and death with pictures of their corpses attached to the letters.		08:30: Morning Battle Practice. Said servitors are destroyed with extreme prejudice with their families being sent messages about how worthless they were in life and death with pictures of their corpses attached to the letters.

	09:00: Armageddon force deployment: gleefully, obeying orders from Roboute Guiliman, the Marines Malevolent, will deploy in force with their shiney new(probably stolen) primaris gear, they happily roll out there new astraeus pattern super heavy tanks, Ballistus pattern dreadnaughts and spartan assault tanks(which were meant to go the Lamenters) into every maternity hospital, garden centre, and refugee camp on Armageddon, entire city blocks ~~are levelled~~ and the number of orks in these sectors is zero, ~~mostly because Captian Vinyar discovered a nearby prometheium refinery~~ and ~~learned what phosphex does~~, ~~much~~ to ~~the absolute horror of the salamanders deployed nearby~~, it is said that because of the ~~Marine's Malevolent's antics,~~ Roboute Guiliman ~~has a Primarch sized stomach ulcer and~~ has taken up smoking, much to the ~~trolling~~ amusement of the marines malevolent~~, more marines malevolent are arriving daily~~		09:00: Armageddon force deployment: gleefully, obeying orders from Roboute Guiliman, the Marines Malevolent, will deploy in force with their shiney new(probably stolen) primaris gear, they happily roll out there new astraeus pattern super heavy tanks, Ballistus pattern dreadnaughts and spartan assault tanks(which were meant to go the Lamenters) into every maternity hospital, garden centre, and refugee camp on Armageddon, using these areas as a shield they can level entire city blocks and the number of orks in these sectors is reduced to zero, and the number of imperial citizens left alive is also, reduced to zero, it is said that because of the stress of these "results" Roboute Guiliman has taken up smoking, much to the gleeful amusement of the marines malevolent

	09:30: Requests for aid from the marines malevolent: at this time, the marines malevolent will listen on every available vox and astropath for requests for aid from the imperium, this is pure comedy to the chapter, trolling, lying, faking aid, and making fun of the defenceless imperial		09:15: defence of Armageddon assets: on direct orders by Roboute Guiliman, marines malevolent have been deployed AWAY from imperial citizens, gaurd, mechanicus, lamenters, salamanders, navy personnel, sisters of battle, sisters hospitaller and anyone's sister, for that matter. their orders are to hold and maintain the Serestus prometheum refinery, "prevent it from falling into enemey hands" and to defend those workers employed at it, having being told what prometheum and phosphex do, it is said that Captian Vinyar had a big shit eating grin on his face, and at that moment every salamander librarian in the sector had a look of absolute horror on his face,

			09:20: abuse of armageddon assets: disregarding previous imperial orders, leaving the prometheium refinery defenceless, captian vinyar, having robbed the salamanders and stolen several their land raider prometheus, will take his battle brothers to fire bomb any nearby hive cities, with 1000s of orks dead and imperial casualties in the millions, the marines will gleefully drive off in their stolen vehicles to go pick up chicks, before being chewed out by roboute guiliman personally it is said that because of the Marine's Malevolent's antics, the avenging son now has a Primarch sized stomach ulcer, getting much giggles from chapter high command, more marines malevolent are arriving daily

			09:45: Requests for aid from the marines malevolent: at this time, the marines malevolent will listen on every available vox and astropath for requests for aid from the imperium, this is pure comedy to the chapter, trolling, lying, faking aid, and making fun of the defenceless imperial

	citizens, making fun of orphans is popular, painting their Armor green and putting on astartes pattern blackface pretending to be the salamanders is also encouraged. suffice to say, that no aid will arrive and the marines malevolent will laugh and laugh while they troll entire sectors, probably being overrun by dark eldar haemonculi covens. captian vinyar, will then order a response be sent out, more often than not this is the astrophathic equivalent of "your moms a whore"		citizens, making fun of orphans is popular, painting their Armor green and putting on astartes pattern blackface pretending to be the salamanders is also encouraged. suffice to say, that no aid will arrive and the marines malevolent will laugh and laugh while they troll entire sectors, probably being overrun by dark eldar haemonculi covens. captian vinyar, will then order a response be sent out, more often than not this is the astrophathic equivalent of "your moms a whore"

37.228.206.198: /* Daily Rituals */ made some corrections to morning firing rights, and changed some things to armageddon force deployment, when marines malevolent discover phosphex and maternity wards, it absolutley horrifys the salamanders

2026-06-20T18:30:41Z

Daily Rituals: made some corrections to morning firing rights, and changed some things to armageddon force deployment, when marines malevolent discover phosphex and maternity wards, it absolutley horrifys the salamanders

← Older revision		Revision as of 18:30, 20 June 2026
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	08:00: Morning Meal. The Marines Malevolent eat a light meal of waffles and milk. Any slightly overcooked waffle demands the immediate conversion of ten serfs into servitors.		08:00: Morning Meal. The Marines Malevolent eat a light meal of waffles and milk. Any slightly overcooked waffle demands the immediate conversion of ten serfs into servitors.

	08:30: ~~Armageddon force deployment: gleefully, obeying orders from Roboute Guiliman, the Marines Malevolent, will deploy in force~~ with their ~~shiney new(probably stolen) primaris gear,~~ they ~~happily roll out there new astraeus pattern super heavy tanks, Ballistus pattern dreadnaughts and spartan assault tanks(which~~ were ~~meant to go the Lamenters) into every maternity hospital, garden centre, and refugee camp on Armageddon, entire city blocks are levelled and the number of orks~~ in ~~these sectors is zero, mostly because they discovered a nearby prometheium refinery~~ and ~~discovered what phosphex does, it is said that because~~ of ~~the marines malevolents antics, Roboute Guiliman has a Primarch sized stomach ulcer and has taken up smoking, much~~ to the ~~trolling amusement of the marines malevolent, more marines malevolent are arriving daily~~		08:30: Morning Battle Practice. Said servitors are destroyed with extreme prejudice with their families being sent messages about how worthless they were in life and death with pictures of their corpses attached to the letters.

	09:00: ~~Morning Battle Practice. Said servitors are destroyed with extreme prejudice~~ with their ~~families being sent messages about how worthless~~ they were in ~~life~~ and ~~death with pictures~~ of ~~their corpses attached~~ to the ~~letters.~~		09:00: Armageddon force deployment: gleefully, obeying orders from Roboute Guiliman, the Marines Malevolent, will deploy in force with their shiney new(probably stolen) primaris gear, they happily roll out there new astraeus pattern super heavy tanks, Ballistus pattern dreadnaughts and spartan assault tanks(which were meant to go the Lamenters) into every maternity hospital, garden centre, and refugee camp on Armageddon, entire city blocks are levelled and the number of orks in these sectors is zero, mostly because Captian Vinyar discovered a nearby prometheium refinery and learned what phosphex does, much to the absolute horror of the salamanders deployed nearby, it is said that because of the Marine's Malevolent's antics, Roboute Guiliman has a Primarch sized stomach ulcer and has taken up smoking, much to the trolling amusement of the marines malevolent, more marines malevolent are arriving daily

	09:30: Requests for aid from the marines malevolent: at this time, the marines malevolent will listen on every available vox and astropath for requests for aid from the imperium, this is pure comedy to the chapter, trolling, lying, faking aid, and making fun of the defenceless imperial		09:30: Requests for aid from the marines malevolent: at this time, the marines malevolent will listen on every available vox and astropath for requests for aid from the imperium, this is pure comedy to the chapter, trolling, lying, faking aid, and making fun of the defenceless imperial

37.228.206.198: /* Daily Rituals */ changed the place the marines malevolent deploy so it doesnt look like they "only" use orphans as shields but in fact will deploy anywhere including maternity wards and garden centres

2026-06-20T18:05:58Z

Daily Rituals: changed the place the marines malevolent deploy so it doesnt look like they "only" use orphans as shields but in fact will deploy anywhere including maternity wards and garden centres

← Older revision		Revision as of 18:05, 20 June 2026
Line 108:		Line 108:
	08:00: Morning Meal. The Marines Malevolent eat a light meal of waffles and milk. Any slightly overcooked waffle demands the immediate conversion of ten serfs into servitors.		08:00: Morning Meal. The Marines Malevolent eat a light meal of waffles and milk. Any slightly overcooked waffle demands the immediate conversion of ten serfs into servitors.

	08:30: Armageddon force deployment: gleefully, obeying orders from Roboute Guiliman, the Marines Malevolent, will deploy in force with their shiney new(probably stolen) primaris gear, they happily roll out there new astraeus pattern super heavy tanks, Ballistus pattern dreadnaughts and spartan assault tanks(which were meant to go the Lamenters) into every ~~orphanage~~, refugee camp ~~and senior citizen activity centre~~ on Armageddon, entire city blocks are levelled and the number of orks in these sectors is zero, mostly because they discovered a nearby prometheium refinery and discovered what phosphex does, it is said that because of the marines malevolents antics, Roboute Guiliman has a Primarch sized stomach ulcer and has taken up smoking, much to the trolling amusement of the marines malevolent, more marines malevolent are arriving daily		08:30: Armageddon force deployment: gleefully, obeying orders from Roboute Guiliman, the Marines Malevolent, will deploy in force with their shiney new(probably stolen) primaris gear, they happily roll out there new astraeus pattern super heavy tanks, Ballistus pattern dreadnaughts and spartan assault tanks(which were meant to go the Lamenters) into every maternity hospital, garden centre, and refugee camp on Armageddon, entire city blocks are levelled and the number of orks in these sectors is zero, mostly because they discovered a nearby prometheium refinery and discovered what phosphex does, it is said that because of the marines malevolents antics, Roboute Guiliman has a Primarch sized stomach ulcer and has taken up smoking, much to the trolling amusement of the marines malevolent, more marines malevolent are arriving daily

	09:00: Morning Battle Practice. Said servitors are destroyed with extreme prejudice with their families being sent messages about how worthless they were in life and death with pictures of their corpses attached to the letters.		09:00: Morning Battle Practice. Said servitors are destroyed with extreme prejudice with their families being sent messages about how worthless they were in life and death with pictures of their corpses attached to the letters.

37.228.206.198: /* Daily Rituals */ added in a bit parodying guilimans view on marines malevolent in which they deploy all their heavy armor to armageddons orphanages and hospitals, they follow guilimans orders, theirs no orks, theirs nothing else left either. as a result of their antics now even the primarch has an ulcer from stress

2026-06-20T18:03:44Z

Daily Rituals: added in a bit parodying guilimans view on marines malevolent in which they deploy all their heavy armor to armageddons orphanages and hospitals, they follow guilimans orders, theirs no orks, theirs nothing else left either. as a result of their antics now even the primarch has an ulcer from stress

← Older revision		Revision as of 18:03, 20 June 2026
Line 107:		Line 107:

	08:00: Morning Meal. The Marines Malevolent eat a light meal of waffles and milk. Any slightly overcooked waffle demands the immediate conversion of ten serfs into servitors.		08:00: Morning Meal. The Marines Malevolent eat a light meal of waffles and milk. Any slightly overcooked waffle demands the immediate conversion of ten serfs into servitors.

			08:30: Armageddon force deployment: gleefully, obeying orders from Roboute Guiliman, the Marines Malevolent, will deploy in force with their shiney new(probably stolen) primaris gear, they happily roll out there new astraeus pattern super heavy tanks, Ballistus pattern dreadnaughts and spartan assault tanks(which were meant to go the Lamenters) into every orphanage, refugee camp and senior citizen activity centre on Armageddon, entire city blocks are levelled and the number of orks in these sectors is zero, mostly because they discovered a nearby prometheium refinery and discovered what phosphex does, it is said that because of the marines malevolents antics, Roboute Guiliman has a Primarch sized stomach ulcer and has taken up smoking, much to the trolling amusement of the marines malevolent, more marines malevolent are arriving daily

	09:00: Morning Battle Practice. Said servitors are destroyed with extreme prejudice with their families being sent messages about how worthless they were in life and death with pictures of their corpses attached to the letters.		09:00: Morning Battle Practice. Said servitors are destroyed with extreme prejudice with their families being sent messages about how worthless they were in life and death with pictures of their corpses attached to the letters.

37.228.203.93: /* Daily Rituals */ added in a bit about the marines malevolent esentially parodying the pollution ads of the 1970s but they dump their rubbish on exodite and maiden worlds, and throw beer cans at aeldari exodites

2025-10-31T11:04:45Z

Daily Rituals: added in a bit about the marines malevolent esentially parodying the pollution ads of the 1970s but they dump their rubbish on exodite and maiden worlds, and throw beer cans at aeldari exodites

← Older revision		Revision as of 11:04, 31 October 2025
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	14:15: force deployment and glory stealing: at this point the marines malevolent will listen in on subsector command on who is "winning" and will casually drop in at the last second(after all the hard work is done by other imperial forces) and kill steal every chaos lord, or ork warboss whos already defeated, broken or about to be killed by those chapters who put in the work, they will then demand a portion of the glory, relics, and a statue to captian vinyar be put up in their capitol before absconding off with the war spoils meant for the lamenters, ocasionally stealing the odd relic vehicle or two		14:15: force deployment and glory stealing: at this point the marines malevolent will listen in on subsector command on who is "winning" and will casually drop in at the last second(after all the hard work is done by other imperial forces) and kill steal every chaos lord, or ork warboss whos already defeated, broken or about to be killed by those chapters who put in the work, they will then demand a portion of the glory, relics, and a statue to captian vinyar be put up in their capitol before absconding off with the war spoils meant for the lamenters, ocasionally stealing the odd relic vehicle or two

			14:30: Waste Management. To demonstrate their unwavering care for the Imperium, the Marines Malevolent casually dump their garbage, nuclear sludge, and melted promethium barrels onto nearby Exodite worlds, filming a single crying xenos for the finale of their “environmental awareness” propaganda video. battle honors to any scout who can nail an exodite with a beer can from a landspeeder.

	15:00: Afternoon Battle Practice. Realize they wasted all that time pointlessly, and so take it out on the chapter serfs by either killing them or burning the cotton they collected. May also fight any Salamanders that happen to be nearby (and usually get beat up by said Salamanders).		15:00: Afternoon Battle Practice. Realize they wasted all that time pointlessly, and so take it out on the chapter serfs by either killing them or burning the cotton they collected. May also fight any Salamanders that happen to be nearby (and usually get beat up by said Salamanders).

37.228.203.93: /* Daily Rituals */ i added in a bit about how the marines malevolent are a chapter of kill stealers who would drop in at the last second pretend to be big heros steal the loot and do the space marine equivalent of "putting their name on the project without doing any work" and build a statue of captian vinyar

2025-10-25T13:13:19Z

Daily Rituals: i added in a bit about how the marines malevolent are a chapter of kill stealers who would drop in at the last second pretend to be big heros steal the loot and do the space marine equivalent of "putting their name on the project without doing any work" and build a statue of captian vinyar

← Older revision		Revision as of 13:13, 25 October 2025
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	14:00: Scamming the imperium: the marines malevolent, will run various ponzi schemes to get rich quick, the current scam is called "established high lords of terra" in which they fool hapless imperial citizens to buy a plot of land on holy terra under the pretence it'll make them a high lord or an inquisitor. many imperial citizens lost their retirement funds to this scam.		14:00: Scamming the imperium: the marines malevolent, will run various ponzi schemes to get rich quick, the current scam is called "established high lords of terra" in which they fool hapless imperial citizens to buy a plot of land on holy terra under the pretence it'll make them a high lord or an inquisitor. many imperial citizens lost their retirement funds to this scam.

			14:15: force deployment and glory stealing: at this point the marines malevolent will listen in on subsector command on who is "winning" and will casually drop in at the last second(after all the hard work is done by other imperial forces) and kill steal every chaos lord, or ork warboss whos already defeated, broken or about to be killed by those chapters who put in the work, they will then demand a portion of the glory, relics, and a statue to captian vinyar be put up in their capitol before absconding off with the war spoils meant for the lamenters, ocasionally stealing the odd relic vehicle or two

	15:00: Afternoon Battle Practice. Realize they wasted all that time pointlessly, and so take it out on the chapter serfs by either killing them or burning the cotton they collected. May also fight any Salamanders that happen to be nearby (and usually get beat up by said Salamanders).		15:00: Afternoon Battle Practice. Realize they wasted all that time pointlessly, and so take it out on the chapter serfs by either killing them or burning the cotton they collected. May also fight any Salamanders that happen to be nearby (and usually get beat up by said Salamanders).

37.228.203.93: /* Daily Rituals */ added in a bit about the calls for aid being a source of comedy for the marines malevolent, dressing up as salamanders, making fun of the poor and helpless, defencless and then astropathically calling those same people who called for aid's moms a whore like a 12 year old boy. i also added in a bit about how they keep trolling the inquisition and pretending to be the celestial lions, similar colorscheme which might explain their bad luck suffice to say they find it funny

2025-10-23T12:11:15Z

Daily Rituals: added in a bit about the calls for aid being a source of comedy for the marines malevolent, dressing up as salamanders, making fun of the poor and helpless, defencless and then astropathically calling those same people who called for aid's moms a whore like a 12 year old boy. i also added in a bit about how they keep trolling the inquisition and pretending to be the celestial lions, similar colorscheme which might explain their bad luck suffice to say they find it funny

← Older revision		Revision as of 12:11, 23 October 2025
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	09:00: Morning Battle Practice. Said servitors are destroyed with extreme prejudice with their families being sent messages about how worthless they were in life and death with pictures of their corpses attached to the letters.		09:00: Morning Battle Practice. Said servitors are destroyed with extreme prejudice with their families being sent messages about how worthless they were in life and death with pictures of their corpses attached to the letters.

			09:30: Requests for aid from the marines malevolent: at this time, the marines malevolent will listen on every available vox and astropath for requests for aid from the imperium, this is pure comedy to the chapter, trolling, lying, faking aid, and making fun of the defenceless imperial

			citizens, making fun of orphans is popular, painting their Armor green and putting on astartes pattern blackface pretending to be the salamanders is also encouraged. suffice to say, that no aid will arrive and the marines malevolent will laugh and laugh while they troll entire sectors, probably being overrun by dark eldar haemonculi covens. captian vinyar, will then order a response be sent out, more often than not this is the astrophathic equivalent of "your moms a whore"

	10:00: Midday Battle Practice. The chapter gathers to talk shit on the majority of the Imperium. This takes a large portion of the day, as the Mechanicus, Militarum, Ecclesiarchy, Inquisition, Iron Hands, Ultrasmurfs, Black Templars, Salamanders, half the population of their planet, and Angry Marines are all talked copious amounts of shit. This time is also set aside to defend the chapter when someone hears that they were talking shit.		10:00: Midday Battle Practice. The chapter gathers to talk shit on the majority of the Imperium. This takes a large portion of the day, as the Mechanicus, Militarum, Ecclesiarchy, Inquisition, Iron Hands, Ultrasmurfs, Black Templars, Salamanders, half the population of their planet, and Angry Marines are all talked copious amounts of shit. This time is also set aside to defend the chapter when someone hears that they were talking shit.

	11:00: Beat up the elderly: the marines malevolent will cruise around in skimmers and rhinos and get into fights with the planets elderly, typically going to retirement homes to beat up veterans of first and second war for Armageddon, beating up orphans is also encouraged, old orphans get beat up twice as much!		11:00: Beat up the elderly: the marines malevolent will cruise around in skimmers and rhinos and get into fights with the planets elderly, typically going to retirement homes to beat up veterans of first and second war for Armageddon, beating up orphans is also encouraged, old orphans get beat up twice as much!

			11:15: troll the inquisitors: at this hour the marines malevolent will paint their shoulder pads blue and troll and annoy any and every inquisitor, vox phone calls, scams, stealing the inquisitors wife, deep faking, noosphere scams, promises to help deathwatch, promises to send marines to help ordo xenos capture new and leathal tyranids, stealing corvus blackstar jets for their own use, drinking all the beer and sending the tab to Gregor eisenhorn, or conducting another "tactical panty raid" on a nearby sorirtas convent, all of which, will be blamed on the celestial lions, much to the delight of the marines malevolent.

	12:00: Memorial desecration hour: for the next hour the marines malevolent will go to any planets that they know have statues dedicated to the salamanders, lamenters, yarrick or emperors spears and desecrate their memorials! statues of Vulkan are a prime target, any civilian who says "your desecrating a war memorial" will be given an astartes sized kick up the ass		12:00: Memorial desecration hour: for the next hour the marines malevolent will go to any planets that they know have statues dedicated to the salamanders, lamenters, yarrick or emperors spears and desecrate their memorials! statues of Vulkan are a prime target, any civilian who says "your desecrating a war memorial" will be given an astartes sized kick up the ass

37.228.203.254: /* Daily Rituals */ i added in a bit about the marines malevolent using captured sonic weaponry to basically troll the imperium with the equivalent of boomboxes and loud music at the worst hours imaginable and giggling about it

2025-09-03T21:19:39Z

Daily Rituals: i added in a bit about the marines malevolent using captured sonic weaponry to basically troll the imperium with the equivalent of boomboxes and loud music at the worst hours imaginable and giggling about it

← Older revision		Revision as of 21:19, 3 September 2025
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	05:00: Enforcement of Morale. Said hunter missiles are launched to awaken the local populace. They always try to aim for adult care centers or hospitals.		05:00: Enforcement of Morale. Said hunter missiles are launched to awaken the local populace. They always try to aim for adult care centers or hospitals.

			05:15: heretical weapons testing: after recently defeating an emperors children's warband marines malevolent have confiscated many sonic blasters, Doomsirens and other emperors children weaponry, rather than hand them over to the inquisition or mechanicus

			they've decided to "test" them out, unfortunately, in what could best be described as "the imperium's worst case of noise pollution" the marines malevolent have aimed their awful boombox weaponry at every meditation centre, maternity ward, psych hospital and shift worker they can find much to the rage and fury of the very tired imperium, the marines malevolent get much giggles and trolling out of this at five in the morning.

	06:00: Morning Prayer. The chapter serfs are sent to collect cotton in the fields whilst the Marines Malevolent pray to the Emperor. These prayers are usually outright ignored.		06:00: Morning Prayer. The chapter serfs are sent to collect cotton in the fields whilst the Marines Malevolent pray to the Emperor. These prayers are usually outright ignored.

37.228.203.254: /* Daily Rituals */ i added in a bit about how marines malevolent handle hostage situations, with massive amounts of firepower in narrow spaces, killing every hostage and target, then i made it encouraged parodying dirty harry on the school bus how the marines would just blow it to bits, and get promoted for it

2025-09-03T21:04:32Z

Daily Rituals: i added in a bit about how marines malevolent handle hostage situations, with massive amounts of firepower in narrow spaces, killing every hostage and target, then i made it encouraged parodying dirty harry on the school bus how the marines would just blow it to bits, and get promoted for it

← Older revision		Revision as of 21:04, 3 September 2025
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	13:00: take a wish: on many imperial worlds they have something resembling the ancient Terran "make a wish" foundation, using a combination of librarians, mechcanicus and the emperors tarot they will steal this wish from orphans to take it for themselves! much to the impotent rage of their human parents!		13:00: take a wish: on many imperial worlds they have something resembling the ancient Terran "make a wish" foundation, using a combination of librarians, mechcanicus and the emperors tarot they will steal this wish from orphans to take it for themselves! much to the impotent rage of their human parents!

			13:15: counterinsurgency and force deployments: being the good neighbours that the marines malevolent are, they are quick to lend aid to any and all hostage or insurgency style problems the imperium has, typically, this resembles a cross between a game of counterstrike and a Michael bay movie, marines malevolent will deploy their ENTIRE devastator company in narrow spaces, with crowd killing, anti personnel weapons, heavy plasma weaponry, incinerators, heavy bolters, conversion beamers in use. this takes about 5 minutes and by the end of it, their aren't any insurgents left...or any buildings standing either, or any hostages, or anything else, any battle brother who suggests the use of kraken rounds or phosphex weaponry, will be immediately removed from the battle line, and put in for promotion as brother Horrigan was after the "school bus incident".

	14:00: Scamming the imperium: the marines malevolent, will run various ponzi schemes to get rich quick, the current scam is called "established high lords of terra" in which they fool hapless imperial citizens to buy a plot of land on holy terra under the pretence it'll make them a high lord or an inquisitor. many imperial citizens lost their retirement funds to this scam.		14:00: Scamming the imperium: the marines malevolent, will run various ponzi schemes to get rich quick, the current scam is called "established high lords of terra" in which they fool hapless imperial citizens to buy a plot of land on holy terra under the pretence it'll make them a high lord or an inquisitor. many imperial citizens lost their retirement funds to this scam.

37.228.203.254: /* Daily Rituals */ i added in 3 entires, one in which they beat up the elderly in retirement homes, because they cant fight back. the next one is parodying make a wish, because stealing from children seems very on brand for marines malevolent and last but not least scamming the imperium parodying established titles from scotland seems like a thing that the marines malevolent would do and laugh about it

2025-08-09T13:54:38Z

Daily Rituals: i added in 3 entires, one in which they beat up the elderly in retirement homes, because they cant fight back. the next one is parodying make a wish, because stealing from children seems very on brand for marines malevolent and last but not least scamming the imperium parodying established titles from scotland seems like a thing that the marines malevolent would do and laugh about it

← Older revision		Revision as of 13:54, 9 August 2025
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	10:00: Midday Battle Practice. The chapter gathers to talk shit on the majority of the Imperium. This takes a large portion of the day, as the Mechanicus, Militarum, Ecclesiarchy, Inquisition, Iron Hands, Ultrasmurfs, Black Templars, Salamanders, half the population of their planet, and Angry Marines are all talked copious amounts of shit. This time is also set aside to defend the chapter when someone hears that they were talking shit.		10:00: Midday Battle Practice. The chapter gathers to talk shit on the majority of the Imperium. This takes a large portion of the day, as the Mechanicus, Militarum, Ecclesiarchy, Inquisition, Iron Hands, Ultrasmurfs, Black Templars, Salamanders, half the population of their planet, and Angry Marines are all talked copious amounts of shit. This time is also set aside to defend the chapter when someone hears that they were talking shit.

			11:00: Beat up the elderly: the marines malevolent will cruise around in skimmers and rhinos and get into fights with the planets elderly, typically going to retirement homes to beat up veterans of first and second war for Armageddon, beating up orphans is also encouraged, old orphans get beat up twice as much!

			12:00: Memorial desecration hour: for the next hour the marines malevolent will go to any planets that they know have statues dedicated to the salamanders, lamenters, yarrick or emperors spears and desecrate their memorials! statues of Vulkan are a prime target, any civilian who says "your desecrating a war memorial" will be given an astartes sized kick up the ass

			any space marines who say that to the marines malevolent will invoke a full chapter wide war!

			13:00: take a wish: on many imperial worlds they have something resembling the ancient Terran "make a wish" foundation, using a combination of librarians, mechcanicus and the emperors tarot they will steal this wish from orphans to take it for themselves! much to the impotent rage of their human parents!

			14:00: Scamming the imperium: the marines malevolent, will run various ponzi schemes to get rich quick, the current scam is called "established high lords of terra" in which they fool hapless imperial citizens to buy a plot of land on holy terra under the pretence it'll make them a high lord or an inquisitor. many imperial citizens lost their retirement funds to this scam.

	15:00: Afternoon Battle Practice. Realize they wasted all that time pointlessly, and so take it out on the chapter serfs by either killing them or burning the cotton they collected. May also fight any Salamanders that happen to be nearby (and usually get beat up by said Salamanders).		15:00: Afternoon Battle Practice. Realize they wasted all that time pointlessly, and so take it out on the chapter serfs by either killing them or burning the cotton they collected. May also fight any Salamanders that happen to be nearby (and usually get beat up by said Salamanders).