Paradox poker - Revision history

Pachinko Man at 03:05, 25 August 2025

2025-08-25T03:05:01Z

← Older revision		Revision as of 03:05, 25 August 2025
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	Mortals such as [[Asdrubael Vect]], [[Lady Malys]], [[Ahzek Ahriman\|Ahriman]], and [[Eldrad]] Ulthran keep trying to peek in through the window to catch a glimpse at this sheer awesomeness but the guard [[Chaos Spawn\|Spawn]] around Tzeentch's bungalow deter everyone, lest they get nommed. A good thing too, since most mortals can't view this without... well, without imploding at the sight of this godly game.		Mortals such as [[Asdrubael Vect]], [[Lady Malys]], [[Ahzek Ahriman\|Ahriman]], and [[Eldrad]] Ulthran keep trying to peek in through the window to catch a glimpse at this sheer awesomeness but the guard [[Chaos Spawn\|Spawn]] around Tzeentch's bungalow deter everyone, lest they get nommed. A good thing too, since most mortals can't view this without... well, without imploding at the sight of this godly game.

	There is a dumbed-down version of this game for mortals called [[Munchkin (Card Game)\|Munchkin]] which involves great levels of dickery between players. [[If The Emperor Had a Text-To-Speech Device]] later stole the joke from [[/tg/\|us]] but decided the game was actually [[Yu-Gi-Oh]] of all things, after one of Alfabusa's friends introduced him to the game and how utterly absurd it can be. This leads to a special in which little Kitten utterly destroys fuckmothering Tzeentch himself at "Paradox-Billiards-Vostroyan-Roulette-Fourth-Dimensional-Hypercube-Chess-Strip Poker" in classic anime fashion; as a nice side effect, Kitten now owns [[Magnus the Red]]'s soul.		There is a dumbed-down version of this game for mortals called [[Munchkin (Card Game)\|Munchkin]] which involves great levels of dickery between players. [[If The Emperor Had a Text-To-Speech Device]] later stole the joke from [[/tg/\|us]] but decided the game was actually [[Yu-Gi-Oh]] of all things, after one of Alfabusa's friends introduced him to the game and how utterly absurd it can be. This leads to a special in which little Kitten utterly destroys his own Emperor and fuckmothering Tzeentch himself at "Paradox-Billiards-Vostroyan-Roulette-Fourth-Dimensional-Hypercube-Chess-Strip Poker" in classic anime fashion; as a nice side effect, Kitten now owns [[Magnus the Red]]'s soul.

	==The Players==		==The Players==

Pachinko Man at 03:04, 25 August 2025

2025-08-25T03:04:37Z

← Older revision		Revision as of 03:04, 25 August 2025
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	Every Saturday night, without fail, the [[God-Emperor of Mankind\|Emperor]], [[Tzeentch]], [[Cegorach]] and the [[Mephet'ran\|Deceiver]] get together with drinks and [[Meatbread\|snacks]] and sit down to enjoy another thrilling game of '''Paradox~~-Billiards-Vostroyan-Roulette-Fourth-Dimensional-Hypercube-Chess-Strip~~ Poker'''~~, or “paradox poker” for short.~~		Every Saturday night, without fail, the [[God-Emperor of Mankind\|Emperor]], [[Tzeentch]], [[Cegorach]] and the [[Mephet'ran\|Deceiver]] get together with drinks and [[Meatbread\|snacks]] and sit down to enjoy another thrilling game of '''Paradox Poker.'''

	The very epitome of [[trolling]], dickery and [[awesome]] in all its glory, the game is an [[Commander\|intense battle of wits to outfuck your opponent's minds until only one remains.]] Since it is impossible for a point of space to maintain its form with so much concentrated [[Just As Planned]] in one spot, they create a new sub-reality to play their game in every week; since the reality collapses very quickly, no one ever truly wins at paradox poker and the intent is more of having a good time with some bros and keeping their minds sharp. Should anyone ever actually win... it is said that men would look good in ponytails, dogs would mate with cats, and Games Workshop would lower their prices shortly before the known universe implodes on itself.		The very epitome of [[trolling]], dickery and [[awesome]] in all its glory, the game is an [[Commander\|intense battle of wits to outfuck your opponent's minds until only one remains.]] Since it is impossible for a point of space to maintain its form with so much concentrated [[Just As Planned]] in one spot, they create a new sub-reality to play their game in every week; since the reality collapses very quickly, no one ever truly wins at paradox poker and the intent is more of having a good time with some bros and keeping their minds sharp. Should anyone ever actually win... it is said that men would look good in ponytails, dogs would mate with cats, and Games Workshop would lower their prices shortly before the known universe implodes on itself.
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	Mortals such as [[Asdrubael Vect]], [[Lady Malys]], [[Ahzek Ahriman\|Ahriman]], and [[Eldrad]] Ulthran keep trying to peek in through the window to catch a glimpse at this sheer awesomeness but the guard [[Chaos Spawn\|Spawn]] around Tzeentch's bungalow deter everyone, lest they get nommed. A good thing too, since most mortals can't view this without... well, without imploding at the sight of this godly game.		Mortals such as [[Asdrubael Vect]], [[Lady Malys]], [[Ahzek Ahriman\|Ahriman]], and [[Eldrad]] Ulthran keep trying to peek in through the window to catch a glimpse at this sheer awesomeness but the guard [[Chaos Spawn\|Spawn]] around Tzeentch's bungalow deter everyone, lest they get nommed. A good thing too, since most mortals can't view this without... well, without imploding at the sight of this godly game.

	There is a dumbed-down version of this game for mortals called [[Munchkin (Card Game)\|Munchkin]] which involves great levels of dickery between players. ~~Similarly,~~ [[If The Emperor Had a Text-To-Speech Device]] ~~also introduces~~ the game ~~as the focal point of an episode or two, where it's revealed to be~~ [[Yu-Gi-Oh]] of all things, ~~as a riff on many different aspects~~ of the ~~franchise (~~how ~~overpowered many builds~~ in ~~the~~ anime ~~would realistically be~~, [[~~Plot armor\|how fast~~ the ~~protagonist can turn them around with one draw~~]]~~, and the [[Skub\|~~'~~'seemingly'' increasingly complex nature]] of the game)~~.		There is a dumbed-down version of this game for mortals called [[Munchkin (Card Game)\|Munchkin]] which involves great levels of dickery between players. [[If The Emperor Had a Text-To-Speech Device]] later stole the joke from [[/tg/\|us]] but decided the game was actually [[Yu-Gi-Oh]] of all things, after one of Alfabusa's friends introduced him to the game and how utterly absurd it can be. This leads to a special in which little Kitten utterly destroys fuckmothering Tzeentch himself at "Paradox-Billiards-Vostroyan-Roulette-Fourth-Dimensional-Hypercube-Chess-Strip Poker" in classic anime fashion; as a nice side effect, Kitten now owns [[Magnus the Red]]'s soul.

	==The Players==		==The Players==
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	*[[Asuryan]] - His Fantasy counterpart used to be a semi-regular guest player before the End Times card was played and got him killed as a result, Part of Tzeentch hoped this wouldn't happen as he was pretty decent with his orderly and logical planning to contrast Cegorach's wild card antics; another part of Tzeentch thought that Asuryan was one knife-eared git with plans within plans too many and got with the other regulars. They managed to piss off Fantasy Khaine into doing his whole thing and eliminated Asuryan entirely for the time being, leaving all four cackling in the process.		*[[Asuryan]] - His Fantasy counterpart used to be a semi-regular guest player before the End Times card was played and got him killed as a result, Part of Tzeentch hoped this wouldn't happen as he was pretty decent with his orderly and logical planning to contrast Cegorach's wild card antics; another part of Tzeentch thought that Asuryan was one knife-eared git with plans within plans too many and got with the other regulars. They managed to piss off Fantasy Khaine into doing his whole thing and eliminated Asuryan entirely for the time being, leaving all four cackling in the process.
	*[[Lileath]] - While her 40K counterpart is still stuck in Slaanesh's gut, her Fantasy counterpart managed to get into the game through virtue of her incredibly dickish manipulations of everyone fighting for order, especially her own species and the Bretonnians. Her plays tend to be callous and highly emotionally manipulative. Eventually got outgambited and seemingly died, removing her from the game more or less until she's discovered in the new universe at some point.		*[[Lileath]] - While her 40K counterpart is still stuck in Slaanesh's gut, her Fantasy counterpart managed to get into the game through virtue of her incredibly dickish manipulations of everyone fighting for order, especially her own species and the Bretonnians. Her plays tend to be callous and highly emotionally manipulative. Eventually got outgambited and seemingly died, removing her from the game more or less until she's discovered in the new universe at some point

	~~== Foreign Company Players ==~~
	~~Noncanon, but still show up, usually uninvited.~~

	* [[wikipedia:Humphrey_Appleby\|Sir Humphrey Appleby]] - Never directly plays but tries to pretend to be one or another player's employee and steer the game from that position. Since the players are more clever and observant than British MPs, this usually doesn't work, but his ploys are usually entertaining and useful enough that he's not actually banned.
	* [[Batman]] - Some of the more [[Mary Sue]] versions of Batman sometimes show up in disguise, usually looking more for information on a case rather than to actually play.
	* [[Exalted \| Ebon Dragon]] - Usually winds up screwing himself over in the process of screwing everybody else. Theoretically banned but he somehow keeps on backstabbing.
	* [[Star Wars \| Sheev Palpatine]] - Mainly notable for being really hard to get rid of; the man is hardier then a Nurglite cockroach infestation. He is a surprisingly conservative player whose main weakness ''seems to be'' a great love of hearing himself talk. Be careful, though, as his double- and triple-bluffs are what keep him in the game; an easy way to make him ragequit is to mention the Disney canon and how he will never be as cool as in the old Expanded Universe.
	* [[/co/ \| Thanos]] - Tolerated mainly because he's a sucker whose plays are fascinating and entertaining in their ultimately self-defeating nature. Constantly tries to get some incredibly broken card into play - almost always fails.
	* David Xanatos - Usually plays penny-ante compared to the other players, but is used to being a minor player among the Big Boys; is tolerated mainly because each of the main players considers him one of theirs, although he winds up working with the Emperor and Tzeentch more than with the others.
	* [[Urza]] - Notable for making convuluted but workable combos out of trash and chaff cards, on the rare occasion that he gets naturally synergistic cards, he will pull off a broken and often infinite combo that only ends when everyone else tires of it or [[Khorne]] shows up to take his still living head and try to add it to his skull throne, forcing Urza to abandon the game for now and retrieve his head.

	== See also ==		== See also ==

imported>Administrator: 102 revisions imported

2023-06-22T14:20:45Z

102 revisions imported

← Older revision	Revision as of 14:20, 22 June 2023
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imported>Administrator: 1 revision imported

2023-06-19T02:54:32Z

1 revision imported

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47.5.179.247: /* Foreign Company Players */

2022-03-18T01:48:45Z

Foreign Company Players

← Older revision		Revision as of 01:48, 18 March 2022
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	* [[Exalted \| Ebon Dragon]] - Usually winds up screwing himself over in the process of screwing everybody else. Theoretically banned but he somehow keeps on backstabbing.		* [[Exalted \| Ebon Dragon]] - Usually winds up screwing himself over in the process of screwing everybody else. Theoretically banned but he somehow keeps on backstabbing.
	* [[Star Wars \| Sheev Palpatine]] - Mainly notable for being really hard to get rid of; the man is hardier then a Nurglite cockroach infestation. He is a surprisingly conservative player whose main weakness ''seems to be'' a great love of hearing himself talk. Be careful, though, as his double- and triple-bluffs are what keep him in the game; an easy way to make him ragequit is to mention the Disney canon and how he will never be as cool as in the old Expanded Universe.		* [[Star Wars \| Sheev Palpatine]] - Mainly notable for being really hard to get rid of; the man is hardier then a Nurglite cockroach infestation. He is a surprisingly conservative player whose main weakness ''seems to be'' a great love of hearing himself talk. Be careful, though, as his double- and triple-bluffs are what keep him in the game; an easy way to make him ragequit is to mention the Disney canon and how he will never be as cool as in the old Expanded Universe.
	* Thanos - Tolerated mainly because he's a sucker whose plays are fascinating and entertaining in their ultimately self-defeating nature. Constantly tries to get some incredibly broken card into play - almost always fails.		* [[/co/ \| Thanos]] - Tolerated mainly because he's a sucker whose plays are fascinating and entertaining in their ultimately self-defeating nature. Constantly tries to get some incredibly broken card into play - almost always fails.
	* David Xanatos - Usually plays penny-ante compared to the other players, but is used to being a minor player among the Big Boys; is tolerated mainly because each of the main players considers him one of theirs, although he winds up working with the Emperor and Tzeentch more than with the others.		* David Xanatos - Usually plays penny-ante compared to the other players, but is used to being a minor player among the Big Boys; is tolerated mainly because each of the main players considers him one of theirs, although he winds up working with the Emperor and Tzeentch more than with the others.
	* [[Urza]] - Notable for making convuluted but workable combos out of trash and chaff cards, on the rare occasion that he gets naturally synergistic cards, he will pull off a broken and often infinite combo that only ends when everyone else tires of it or [[Khorne]] shows up to take his still living head and try to add it to his skull throne, forcing Urza to abandon the game for now and retrieve his head.		* [[Urza]] - Notable for making convuluted but workable combos out of trash and chaff cards, on the rare occasion that he gets naturally synergistic cards, he will pull off a broken and often infinite combo that only ends when everyone else tires of it or [[Khorne]] shows up to take his still living head and try to add it to his skull throne, forcing Urza to abandon the game for now and retrieve his head.

47.5.179.247: /* Foreign Company Players */

2022-03-18T01:47:00Z

Foreign Company Players

← Older revision		Revision as of 01:47, 18 March 2022
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	* [[Batman]] - Some of the more [[Mary Sue]] versions of Batman sometimes show up in disguise, usually looking more for information on a case rather than to actually play.		* [[Batman]] - Some of the more [[Mary Sue]] versions of Batman sometimes show up in disguise, usually looking more for information on a case rather than to actually play.
	* [[Exalted \| Ebon Dragon]] - Usually winds up screwing himself over in the process of screwing everybody else. Theoretically banned but he somehow keeps on backstabbing.		* [[Exalted \| Ebon Dragon]] - Usually winds up screwing himself over in the process of screwing everybody else. Theoretically banned but he somehow keeps on backstabbing.
	* [[Star Wars \| ~~Papa~~ Palpatine]] - Mainly notable for being really hard to get rid of; the man is hardier then a Nurglite cockroach infestation. He is a surprisingly conservative player whose main weakness ''seems to be'' a great love of hearing himself talk. Be careful, though, as his double- and triple-bluffs are what keep him in the game; an easy way to make him ragequit is to mention the Disney canon and how he will never be as cool as in the old Expanded Universe.		* [[Star Wars \| Sheev Palpatine]] - Mainly notable for being really hard to get rid of; the man is hardier then a Nurglite cockroach infestation. He is a surprisingly conservative player whose main weakness ''seems to be'' a great love of hearing himself talk. Be careful, though, as his double- and triple-bluffs are what keep him in the game; an easy way to make him ragequit is to mention the Disney canon and how he will never be as cool as in the old Expanded Universe.
	* Thanos - Tolerated mainly because he's a sucker whose plays are fascinating and entertaining in their ultimately self-defeating nature. Constantly tries to get some incredibly broken card into play - almost always fails.		* Thanos - Tolerated mainly because he's a sucker whose plays are fascinating and entertaining in their ultimately self-defeating nature. Constantly tries to get some incredibly broken card into play - almost always fails.
	* David Xanatos - Usually plays penny-ante compared to the other players, but is used to being a minor player among the Big Boys; is tolerated mainly because each of the main players considers him one of theirs, although he winds up working with the Emperor and Tzeentch more than with the others.		* David Xanatos - Usually plays penny-ante compared to the other players, but is used to being a minor player among the Big Boys; is tolerated mainly because each of the main players considers him one of theirs, although he winds up working with the Emperor and Tzeentch more than with the others.

1d4chan>MrPhantom: /* Common Guests */

2021-10-28T08:37:21Z

Common Guests

← Older revision		Revision as of 08:37, 28 October 2021
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	*[[Cypher]] - Constantly tries to rig the game whenever he shows up by seeing the cards everyone else plays then travelling to an earlier timeline and trying to counter them. This causes Tzeentch to rage despite the fact that the gods all have better cards in their hands than Cypher. The Deciever combos with Cypher to pull some impossible shit that gets everyone else scratching their heads. Some people think he's rigging the game in the Emperor's favour; others think he keeps trying to position himself next to Big Emps to poke him with a sword. No one is entirely certain though, nor do they know how his head hasn't exploded despite his mortality.		*[[Cypher]] - Constantly tries to rig the game whenever he shows up by seeing the cards everyone else plays then travelling to an earlier timeline and trying to counter them. This causes Tzeentch to rage despite the fact that the gods all have better cards in their hands than Cypher. The Deciever combos with Cypher to pull some impossible shit that gets everyone else scratching their heads. Some people think he's rigging the game in the Emperor's favour; others think he keeps trying to position himself next to Big Emps to poke him with a sword. No one is entirely certain though, nor do they know how his head hasn't exploded despite his mortality.
	*The [[Primarchs]] - All of the Primarchs, at one point or another, have had a go at their old man's hobby. [[Horus Heresy\|It usually ends badly for everyone involved]], especially when [[Alpharius]] was invited and defeated, only for it to turn out that it was just a random member of the [[Alpha Legion]] while everyone else was actually Alpharius in disguise, leaving the real players locked outside Tzeentch's bungalow, bewildered and confused. [[Magnus The Red\|Magnus]] in particular has a surprising penchant for the game on par with both of his adoptive fathers, though [[Lorgar Aurelian\|Lorgar]], [[Corvus Corax\|Edgar Allen Primarch]], and even [[Leman Russ\|wolfman]] are all talented in their own ways. (That last one causes Magnus a great deal of discomfort.)		*The [[Primarchs]] - All of the Primarchs, at one point or another, have had a go at their old man's hobby. [[Horus Heresy\|It usually ends badly for everyone involved]], especially when [[Alpharius]] was invited and defeated, only for it to turn out that it was just a random member of the [[Alpha Legion]] while everyone else was actually Alpharius in disguise, leaving the real players locked outside Tzeentch's bungalow, bewildered and confused. [[Magnus The Red\|Magnus]] in particular has a surprising penchant for the game on par with both of his adoptive fathers, though [[Lorgar Aurelian\|Lorgar]], [[Corvus Corax\|Edgar Allen Primarch]], and even [[Leman Russ\|wolfman]] are all talented in their own ways. (That last one causes Magnus a great deal of discomfort.)
	*The [[Horned Rat]] - While technically coming from another universe, the Horned Rat often finds himself invited for games. When the Horned Rat loses rounds it's because the cards he plays have a nasty habit of stabbing each other in the back, but this is mitigated by only the Hive Mind throwing more cards down than him. He finds ways to put himself out on top in the end and isn't afraid of making temporary truces with other players to get what he wants. He earned his status of major chaos godhood thanks to some tricksy hands and clever bets made during ~~a game~~, earning quite a lot of grumbling from Tzeentch who regards the vermin god as a dirty upstart.		*The [[Horned Rat]] - While technically coming from another universe, the Horned Rat often finds himself invited for games. When the Horned Rat loses rounds it's because the cards he plays have a nasty habit of stabbing each other in the back, but this is mitigated by only the Hive Mind throwing more cards down than him. He finds ways to put himself out on top in the end and isn't afraid of making temporary truces with other players to get what he wants. He earned his status of major chaos godhood thanks to some tricksy hands and clever bets made during the [[End Times]] tournament closing out the Old World campaign, earning quite a lot of grumbling from Tzeentch who regards the vermin god as a dirty upstart.
	*[[Nagash]] - Not invited often because he still needs to get his "just as planned" game up, Nagash is nevertheless a very patient player who isn't afraid of spending assets in huge amounts. His primary weakness is that he often lets himself be suckered into ego plays that prey on his tendency to get pretty mad when things don't go his way. If he can keep his cool, he can flip seemingly valueless assets into much better cards, like when he took the wastrel Arkhan and made him into one of the greatest human sorcerers to ever live. He also has a habit of seemingly losing a round only to end up ahead of where he was anyway and never seeming to be more than temporarily set back by defeats, managing to play his cards right and win the true godhood deck even during the [[The End Times\|End Times Tournament]].		*[[Nagash]] - Not invited often because he still needs to get his "just as planned" game up, Nagash is nevertheless a very patient player who isn't afraid of spending assets in huge amounts. His primary weakness is that he often lets himself be suckered into ego plays that prey on his tendency to get pretty mad when things don't go his way. If he can keep his cool, he can flip seemingly valueless assets into much better cards, like when he took the wastrel Arkhan and made him into one of the greatest human sorcerers to ever live. He also has a habit of seemingly losing a round only to end up ahead of where he was anyway and never seeming to be more than temporarily set back by defeats, managing to play his cards right and win the true godhood deck even during the [[The End Times\|End Times Tournament]].
	*[[Lord Kroak]] - Collectively representing the Slann is Lord Kroak, who in fact died so he could spend more time playing the fantasy version of the game. When the old world went kaputt and he ascended to godhood he started getting invitations to Tzeentch's bungalow as well, though he's often busy with the plans within plans the Slann are working on. Lord Kroak tends to rely more on divination and having the right card at the right time and place over luck to win rounds, and very often seeming defeats turn out to have been the plan the whole time.		*[[Lord Kroak]] - Collectively representing the Slann is Lord Kroak, who in fact died so he could spend more time playing the fantasy version of the game. When the old world went kaputt and he ascended to godhood he started getting invitations to Tzeentch's bungalow as well, though he's often busy with the plans within plans the Slann are working on. Lord Kroak tends to rely more on divination and having the right card at the right time and place over luck to win rounds, and very often seeming defeats turn out to have been the plan the whole time.

1d4chan>Tsabo7 at 00:45, 7 September 2021

2021-09-07T00:45:32Z

← Older revision		Revision as of 00:45, 7 September 2021
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	The very epitome of [[trolling]], dickery and [[awesome]] in all its glory, the game is an [[Commander\|intense battle of wits to outfuck your opponent's minds until only one remains.]] Since it is impossible for a point of space to maintain its form with so much concentrated [[Just As Planned]] in one spot, they create a new sub-reality to play their game in every week; since the reality collapses very quickly, no one ever truly wins at paradox poker and the intent is more of having a good time with some bros and keeping their minds sharp. Should anyone ever actually win... it is said that men would look good in ponytails, dogs would mate with cats, and Games Workshop would lower their prices shortly before the known universe implodes on itself.		The very epitome of [[trolling]], dickery and [[awesome]] in all its glory, the game is an [[Commander\|intense battle of wits to outfuck your opponent's minds until only one remains.]] Since it is impossible for a point of space to maintain its form with so much concentrated [[Just As Planned]] in one spot, they create a new sub-reality to play their game in every week; since the reality collapses very quickly, no one ever truly wins at paradox poker and the intent is more of having a good time with some bros and keeping their minds sharp. Should anyone ever actually win... it is said that men would look good in ponytails, dogs would mate with cats, and Games Workshop would lower their prices shortly before the known universe implodes on itself.

	Mortals such as [[Asdrubael Vect]], [[Lady Malys]], [[Ahriman]], and [[Eldrad]] Ulthran keep trying to peek in through the window to catch a glimpse at this sheer awesomeness but the guard [[Chaos Spawn\|Spawn]] around Tzeentch's bungalow deter everyone, lest they get nommed. A good thing too, since most mortals can't view this without... well, without imploding at the sight of this godly game.		Mortals such as [[Asdrubael Vect]], [[Lady Malys]], [[Ahzek Ahriman\|Ahriman]], and [[Eldrad]] Ulthran keep trying to peek in through the window to catch a glimpse at this sheer awesomeness but the guard [[Chaos Spawn\|Spawn]] around Tzeentch's bungalow deter everyone, lest they get nommed. A good thing too, since most mortals can't view this without... well, without imploding at the sight of this godly game.

	There is a dumbed-down version of this game for mortals called [[Munchkin (Card Game)\|Munchkin]] which involves great levels of dickery between players. Similarly, [[If The Emperor Had a Text-To-Speech Device]] also introduces the game as the focal point of an episode or two, where it's revealed to be [[Yu-Gi-Oh]] of all things, as a riff on many different aspects of the franchise (how overpowered many builds in the anime would realistically be, [[Plot armor\|how fast the protagonist can turn them around with one draw]], and the [[Skub\|''seemingly'' increasingly complex nature]] of the game).		There is a dumbed-down version of this game for mortals called [[Munchkin (Card Game)\|Munchkin]] which involves great levels of dickery between players. Similarly, [[If The Emperor Had a Text-To-Speech Device]] also introduces the game as the focal point of an episode or two, where it's revealed to be [[Yu-Gi-Oh]] of all things, as a riff on many different aspects of the franchise (how overpowered many builds in the anime would realistically be, [[Plot armor\|how fast the protagonist can turn them around with one draw]], and the [[Skub\|''seemingly'' increasingly complex nature]] of the game).

1d4chan>Tsabo7: /* Foreign Company Players */

2021-09-06T22:03:57Z

Foreign Company Players

← Older revision		Revision as of 22:03, 6 September 2021
Line 71:		Line 71:
	* Thanos - Tolerated mainly because he's a sucker whose plays are fascinating and entertaining in their ultimately self-defeating nature. Constantly tries to get some incredibly broken card into play - almost always fails.		* Thanos - Tolerated mainly because he's a sucker whose plays are fascinating and entertaining in their ultimately self-defeating nature. Constantly tries to get some incredibly broken card into play - almost always fails.
	* David Xanatos - Usually plays penny-ante compared to the other players, but is used to being a minor player among the Big Boys; is tolerated mainly because each of the main players considers him one of theirs, although he winds up working with the Emperor and Tzeentch more than with the others.		* David Xanatos - Usually plays penny-ante compared to the other players, but is used to being a minor player among the Big Boys; is tolerated mainly because each of the main players considers him one of theirs, although he winds up working with the Emperor and Tzeentch more than with the others.
	* [[Urza]]		* [[Urza]] - Notable for making convuluted but workable combos out of trash and chaff cards, on the rare occasion that he gets naturally synergistic cards, he will pull off a broken and often infinite combo that only ends when everyone else tires of it or [[Khorne]] shows up to take his still living head and try to add it to his skull throne, forcing Urza to abandon the game for now and retrieve his head.

	== See also ==		== See also ==

2600:1700:9756:490:B171:3AD8:6549:AB3 at 07:52, 29 May 2021

2021-05-29T07:52:59Z

← Older revision		Revision as of 07:52, 29 May 2021
Line 5:		Line 5:
	Mortals such as [[Asdrubael Vect]], [[Lady Malys]], [[Ahriman]], and [[Eldrad]] Ulthran keep trying to peek in through the window to catch a glimpse at this sheer awesomeness but the guard [[Chaos Spawn\|Spawn]] around Tzeentch's bungalow deter everyone, lest they get nommed. A good thing too, since most mortals can't view this without... well, without imploding at the sight of this godly game.		Mortals such as [[Asdrubael Vect]], [[Lady Malys]], [[Ahriman]], and [[Eldrad]] Ulthran keep trying to peek in through the window to catch a glimpse at this sheer awesomeness but the guard [[Chaos Spawn\|Spawn]] around Tzeentch's bungalow deter everyone, lest they get nommed. A good thing too, since most mortals can't view this without... well, without imploding at the sight of this godly game.

	There is a dumbed-down version of this game for mortals called [[Munchkin (Card Game)\|Munchkin]] which involves great levels of dickery between players. Similarly, [[If The Emperor Had a Text-To-Speech Device]] also introduces the game as the focal point of an episode or two, where it's revealed to be [[Yu-Gi-Oh]] of all things, as a riff on the [[Skub\|''seemingly'' increasingly complex nature]] of the game.		There is a dumbed-down version of this game for mortals called [[Munchkin (Card Game)\|Munchkin]] which involves great levels of dickery between players. Similarly, [[If The Emperor Had a Text-To-Speech Device]] also introduces the game as the focal point of an episode or two, where it's revealed to be [[Yu-Gi-Oh]] of all things, as a riff on many different aspects of the franchise (how overpowered many builds in the anime would realistically be, [[Plot armor\|how fast the protagonist can turn them around with one draw]], and the [[Skub\|''seemingly'' increasingly complex nature]] of the game).

	==The Players==		==The Players==

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	The very epitome of [[trolling]], dickery and [[awesome]] in all its glory, the game is an [[Commander\|intense battle of wits to outfuck your opponent's minds until only one remains.]] Since it is impossible for a point of space to maintain its form with so much concentrated [[Just As Planned]] in one spot, they create a new sub-reality to play their game in every week; since the reality collapses very quickly, no one ever truly wins at paradox poker and the intent is more of having a good time with some bros and keeping their minds sharp. Should anyone ever actually win... it is said that men would look good in ponytails, dogs would mate with cats, and Games Workshop would lower their prices shortly before the known universe implodes on itself.		The very epitome of [[trolling]], dickery and [[awesome]] in all its glory, the game is an [[Commander\|intense battle of wits to outfuck your opponent's minds until only one remains.]] Since it is impossible for a point of space to maintain its form with so much concentrated [[Just As Planned]] in one spot, they create a new sub-reality to play their game in every week; since the reality collapses very quickly, no one ever truly wins at paradox poker and the intent is more of having a good time with some bros and keeping their minds sharp. Should anyone ever actually win... it is said that men would look good in ponytails, dogs would mate with cats, and Games Workshop would lower their prices shortly before the known universe implodes on itself.

	Mortals such as [[Asdrubael Vect]], [[Lady Malys]], [[Ahriman]], and [[Eldrad]] Ulthran keep trying to peek in through the window to catch a glimpse at this sheer awesomeness but the guard [[Chaos Spawn\|Spawn]] around Tzeentch's bungalow deter everyone, lest they get nommed. A good thing too, since most mortals can't view this without... well, without imploding at the sight of this godly game.		Mortals such as [[Asdrubael Vect]], [[Lady Malys]], [[Ahzek Ahriman\|Ahriman]], and [[Eldrad]] Ulthran keep trying to peek in through the window to catch a glimpse at this sheer awesomeness but the guard [[Chaos Spawn\|Spawn]] around Tzeentch's bungalow deter everyone, lest they get nommed. A good thing too, since most mortals can't view this without... well, without imploding at the sight of this godly game.

	There is a dumbed-down version of this game for mortals called [[Munchkin (Card Game)\|Munchkin]] which involves great levels of dickery between players. Similarly, [[If The Emperor Had a Text-To-Speech Device]] also introduces the game as the focal point of an episode or two, where it's revealed to be [[Yu-Gi-Oh]] of all things, as a riff on many different aspects of the franchise (how overpowered many builds in the anime would realistically be, [[Plot armor\|how fast the protagonist can turn them around with one draw]], and the [[Skub\|''seemingly'' increasingly complex nature]] of the game).		There is a dumbed-down version of this game for mortals called [[Munchkin (Card Game)\|Munchkin]] which involves great levels of dickery between players. Similarly, [[If The Emperor Had a Text-To-Speech Device]] also introduces the game as the focal point of an episode or two, where it's revealed to be [[Yu-Gi-Oh]] of all things, as a riff on many different aspects of the franchise (how overpowered many builds in the anime would realistically be, [[Plot armor\|how fast the protagonist can turn them around with one draw]], and the [[Skub\|''seemingly'' increasingly complex nature]] of the game).