Elf: Difference between revisions
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Elves are forest-dwelling sisses; the antithesis to the manly [[dwarf]] race. Elves are the chosen race of many [[Mary Sue]]s in the fantasy setting thanks to their pointed ears, slender builds and and ever-perky breasts. Though related, they are not in fact [[eldar]] due primarily that one is found in space with guns that shoot shurikens and the other live in forests and have bows that loose arrows. Unless you're playing something crazy like Spelljammer. | Elves are forest-dwelling sisses; the antithesis to the manly [[dwarf]] race. Elves are the chosen race of many [[Mary Sue]]s in the fantasy setting thanks to their pointed ears, slender builds and and ever-perky breasts. Though related, they are not in fact [[eldar]] due primarily that one is found in space with guns that shoot shurikens and the other live in forests and have bows that loose arrows. Unless you're playing something crazy like Spelljammer. In all actuality female elves are the more manly of the elven race since they're the only ones to ever leave the forests and attempt to do manly things. | ||
[[Image:elf.jpg|thumb|200px|right|Even this masculine elf is actually female.]] | [[Image:elf.jpg|thumb|200px|right|Even this masculine elf is actually female.]] | ||
Revision as of 08:14, 29 June 2008
Elves are forest-dwelling sisses; the antithesis to the manly dwarf race. Elves are the chosen race of many Mary Sues in the fantasy setting thanks to their pointed ears, slender builds and and ever-perky breasts. Though related, they are not in fact eldar due primarily that one is found in space with guns that shoot shurikens and the other live in forests and have bows that loose arrows. Unless you're playing something crazy like Spelljammer. In all actuality female elves are the more manly of the elven race since they're the only ones to ever leave the forests and attempt to do manly things.
Or that could be why they're always scantily-clad and the fantasy of neckbeards everywhere.
Typical Elven Traits and Habits
- Having long/pointed ears
- Hugging trees
- Eating granola
- Kissing bunnies
- Prancing in meadows
- Being sissies or girls
- Bringing useless cloth to your dwarven fortress
All elves are female until proven otherwise.
In much the same way that a single dwarf can kill ten orcs, ten orcs can easily rape an elf. Though it doesn't count, cause they're elves.
Uses of elves
- Slaves/pets.
- 35 elf bone bolts can be made from one elf.