Los Tiburon: Difference between revisions
1d4chan>NotBrandX Created page with "{{story}} This is a story by BROther Laughing Man !!6Ltud83uedY . Playing half-orc monk. Decided to play something beyond weeaboo 'i am master of martial arts.' Spent..." |
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{{story}} | {{story}} | ||
This is a story by BROther Laughing Man !!6Ltud83uedY . | This is a story by {{Anonymous|BROther Laughing Man|!!6Ltud83uedY}}. | ||
Playing half-orc [[monk]]. | Playing [[half-orc]] [[monk]]. Decided to play something beyond [[weeaboo]] 'i am master of martial arts.' Spent 100gp on an inlaid mask with intricate tribal designs sewn on the sides with a 'fin' on top. Thus I became '''LOS TIBURON''', THE SHARK OF THE LAND, MASKED WRESTLER. I took all my feats revolving around grappling. Grappled EVERYTHING. EVERY. FUCKING. THING. including, but not limited to, a [[bear]]. | ||
master of martial arts.' | |||
tribal designs sewn on the sides with a 'fin' on top. Thus I became LOS | |||
TIBURON, THE SHARK OF THE LAND, MASKED WRESTLER. | |||
revolving around grappling. Grappled EVERYTHING. EVERY. FUCKING. THING. | |||
including, but not limited to, a bear. | |||
Final part of the campaign: OH SHIT DRAGON. | Final part of the campaign: OH SHIT DRAGON. [[Dragon]] acts like a faggot, ducking into the water and popping out for breath weapon. Fuck that; I'mma charging its ass. My brother was playing a [[warforged]] [[fighter]] and assists my MIGHTY LEAP into the air, where I pose mid-air and shout about the HONOR OF THE MASK. That's how I TACKLED A FUCKING DRAGON. Dealt unarmed damage, latched on, and took a deep breath to prepare for the underwater struggle. | ||
ducking into the water and popping out for breath weapon. Fuck that; | |||
I'mma charging its ass. My brother was playing a warforged fighter and | |||
assists my MIGHTY LEAP into the air, where I pose mid-air and shout about | |||
the HONOR OF THE MASK. That's how I TACKLED A FUCKING DRAGON. | |||
unarmed damage, latched on, and took a deep breath to prepare for the | |||
underwater struggle. | |||
Dragon goes up. I forgot they can fly. | Dragon goes up. I forgot they can fly. DM gives me the option to let go before dragon takes off. Fuck that! I'm still wrestling! 200 FEET IN THE AIR, STILL WRESTLING A DRAGON AND DEALING UNARMED DAMAGE! Dragon actually starts hurting me; I need a plan. That's when brilliance strikes me: | ||
before dragon takes off. Fuck that! I'm still wrestling! | |||
THE AIR, STILL WRESTLING A DRAGON AND DEALING UNARMED DAMAGE! | |||
actually starts hurting me; I need a plan. | |||
strikes me: | |||
"I roll to pin." | "I roll to pin." | ||
The entire table fell silent. | The entire table fell silent. I roll to 'pin' the dragon's wings behind its back, so it can't fly anymore. THE ENTIRE TABLE LEANS FORWARD TO WATCH THIS ROLL OF DESTINY. NATURAL. FUCKING. [[d20|TWENTY]]. I pin the dragon's wings, sending it and me hurtling into the ground. I have one combat round left to make my final statement. | ||
its back, so it can't fly anymore. | |||
WATCH THIS ROLL OF DESTINY. NATURAL. FUCKING. TWENTY. I pin the | |||
dragon's wings, sending it and me hurtling into the ground. | |||
combat round left to make my final statement. | |||
"I AM LOS TIBURON! AND I... AM... A LUCHA!!!" | "I AM LOS TIBURON! AND I... AM... A LUCHA!!!" | ||
Dragon's neck snaps on impact. Through sheer luck or GM fiat -- possibly | Dragon's neck snaps on impact. Through sheer luck or GM fiat -- possibly both -- I survive at -4 HP. The party cleric brings me bacup up to 1 HP, picks me up, and holds one arm into the air. My brother the fighter immediately bangs his shield twice, making the bell noise. Party's [[bard]]/diplomancer announces "And the winner is... Los Tiburon!" | ||
both -- I survive at -4 HP. The party cleric brings me bacup up to 1 HP, | |||
picks me up, and holds one arm into the air. My brother the fighter | |||
immediately bangs his shield twice, making the bell noise. Party's bard/ | |||
diplomancer announces "And the winner is... Los Tiburon!" | |||
And that's how I made it to level four. | And that's how I made it to level four. | ||
Revision as of 01:25, 2 July 2013
This is a story by BROther Laughing Man !!6Ltud83uedY.
Playing half-orc monk. Decided to play something beyond weeaboo 'i am master of martial arts.' Spent 100gp on an inlaid mask with intricate tribal designs sewn on the sides with a 'fin' on top. Thus I became LOS TIBURON, THE SHARK OF THE LAND, MASKED WRESTLER. I took all my feats revolving around grappling. Grappled EVERYTHING. EVERY. FUCKING. THING. including, but not limited to, a bear.
Final part of the campaign: OH SHIT DRAGON. Dragon acts like a faggot, ducking into the water and popping out for breath weapon. Fuck that; I'mma charging its ass. My brother was playing a warforged fighter and assists my MIGHTY LEAP into the air, where I pose mid-air and shout about the HONOR OF THE MASK. That's how I TACKLED A FUCKING DRAGON. Dealt unarmed damage, latched on, and took a deep breath to prepare for the underwater struggle.
Dragon goes up. I forgot they can fly. DM gives me the option to let go before dragon takes off. Fuck that! I'm still wrestling! 200 FEET IN THE AIR, STILL WRESTLING A DRAGON AND DEALING UNARMED DAMAGE! Dragon actually starts hurting me; I need a plan. That's when brilliance strikes me:
"I roll to pin."
The entire table fell silent. I roll to 'pin' the dragon's wings behind its back, so it can't fly anymore. THE ENTIRE TABLE LEANS FORWARD TO WATCH THIS ROLL OF DESTINY. NATURAL. FUCKING. TWENTY. I pin the dragon's wings, sending it and me hurtling into the ground. I have one combat round left to make my final statement.
"I AM LOS TIBURON! AND I... AM... A LUCHA!!!"
Dragon's neck snaps on impact. Through sheer luck or GM fiat -- possibly both -- I survive at -4 HP. The party cleric brings me bacup up to 1 HP, picks me up, and holds one arm into the air. My brother the fighter immediately bangs his shield twice, making the bell noise. Party's bard/diplomancer announces "And the winner is... Los Tiburon!"
And that's how I made it to level four.